"Shit Happens: Chocolate Lovers Deliver the Scoop on Poop" (Hustler Magazine June 2001

by Dan Kapelovitz Illustration by Easel Peetz Houdini, an acquisitions-and-mergers analyst from East Meadow, New York, has been eating feces since his first day of kindergarten, when a female classmate pooped in her hands and dared him to lick her fingers clean. "I don't recall her shit tasting all that bad. In fact, I rather liked it," Houdini says. "When the teacher saw the mess, she yelled at us. We both cried and were taken to the nurse's office, and our parents were called to take us home." Houdini, now 42 years old, has been fascinated with beautiful women's bowel movements ever since that first day of poo-poo play; for him, scat appeals to all five senses. "It's visually stimulating to watch a lady's asshole expand and have a very large load slowly exit her body," Houdini says. "Second, I'm drawn to the texture. It feels mushy in my hands or on my face or on my erect penis. Next, I'm drawn to the smell. It still fascinates me that when a halfway decent-looking lady takes a shit, it can stink so badly. I also enjoy the crackling sound of shit

" *** Human toilets often trace their unsettling eating habits back to an early childhood experience. a female's pee is her holy water. "I began shitting my panties. A clean scat is an anusto-mouth transfer of excreta that involves little or no smearing. Feeders refers to those who supply crap to the dookie munchers of the world. Germany. A fan of the messy scat prefers to play with the poop before devouring it." Shit-eating is known as coprophagy among clinical psychologists. Many finicky log swallowers prefer their shit to be dark brown. Caviar is often employed as a euphemism for feces. is new to the scat scene. almost black. and was having trouble holding it. "I had to go to the loo very badly. and a female's shit is her sacrament. The orgasm I had when I smeared the mess over my cunt was unbelievable. which I accept and wish to drink from her directly. but doo-doo devotees favor the term recycling. a 38-year-old mother of two who works as a translator in a small town outside of Munich. taste and color of the turds they consume.coming out of a lady's rearend. Fudge freaks are fanatically particular about the size. Eating a bag of Oreo . As for the taste—to me. The warmth and the feeling of shit running down my legs aroused me so much that I emptied myself into my knickers completely." Heidi recalls. but Heidi.

Bananas are said to produce flavorful." recalls Ed. scat providers often eat sugary foods to achieve fecal sweetness. a black compound). the active ingredient in the famously pink stomach reliever. aromatic stools. In the taste department. or a large quantity of Dutched cocoa." Dung gobblers avoid red meat. a fudge man who frequents Internet scat rooms. combines with sulfur in the gut to form bismuth sulfide. Creamed onions make the sweetest and best shit I ever tasted. A select band of porn stars makes a living by catering to coprophiliac jackoffs.cookies. will achieve this end. "Man. which yield foul-smelling and tasting craps. but I finished them just to be polite. The most famous scat queen is Veronica Moser. the Cindy Margolis of shit. "My host served creamed onions at Thanksgiving—not my favorite. the resulting turd will be especially large. oh man. cheese. and then pinch back a loaf for as long as possible before finally taking a dump. as will chugging Pepto-Bismol (bismuth. meaty coil of night soil will instruct his or her feeder to eat a huge meal. were they good the next day. A crap connoisseur in the mood for a long. but shit invariably tastes like shit (which is said to resemble ripe Camembert by fecal gourmets). beans and dark beers. A Web surfer who comes across .

Born in a small town in Austria. "Pretty soon. I opened my mouth. you can see in my movies." Moser's oeuvre is impressive indeed. "There was one fellow who wanted to shit on me. Being a good girl. shit into it every morning and ate it. then nude modeling and. diligence and an admirable work ethic made Moser the woman she is today. who has made some 120 XXX flicks since 1987. and I dreamt of being covered with the shit of a lot of men. and I spit it out. many of them scat-related. In Kaviar Dinner. Moser worked for years as a secretary. but this was too-strong stuff for me then." Moser recalls. my own caviar wasn't enough for me. eventually broke into modeling. finally. In Der Kaviar Express. "Always getting more extreme and a willingness to learn resulted in giving caviar a try." Moser says. Veronica shows neophytes how to . Xrated movies. the potty-porn vixen craps on a man's cock. In Sperrgebeit 2. the human toilet chews and swallows a log straight from a brunette's ass. then sucks his fudgesicle clean. What became of me." Though the game starlet was initially repulsed by the taste of human waste. Munching butt brownies soon followed. "I took a bowl.an image of a blonde with blue-gray eyes and naturally large breasts gobbling caca is most likely gawking at Moser.

E. even your own. "Eating fecal material. a . Cage endangered her unborn child.acquire a taste for stools by eating a man's feces out of a bowl with a spoon. An appreciation for erotic shit play seems to be inversely related to general cultural repression. I learn philosophy in an important university. appears to be airing its messy side by way of a particularly large scat industry. South Carolina. a physician at Harbor View Hospital in Columbia. "Feces carries parasites. has been playing "dirty games" since she was six years old. in which she swallowed shit. Mel Sarikian. but she demonstrated abysmal mothering skills by starring in Pregnant Hard Shit Games. law. piss and puke straight from a male costar—while she was six months pregnant. the 25-year-old queen of French poo-poo porn. another anally retentive society." Sarikian says. "When I don't eat shit and don't have sex. Notoriously fussy Germany pumps out an impressive array of shit-themed films and periodicals. Cage may be educated. According to Dr. bacteria and viruses. can be hazardous to your health. but a video store with potty erotica on the shelves could find itself fighting an obscenity rap with local prosecutors.S. Shit flicks aren't specifically outlawed by U. Alexia Cage. coli. Japan." Cage says.

feces and urine are not designed for consumption and can have a repulsive effect. "Like any other sexual act. where complete ignorance of health-and-safety basics appears to be the rule. an underground U. cholera and bad breath). but hell. can be life-threatening. which passes after a few hours. founder of Scatmania.-based Web site.bacterium. I've had the same result from bad Chinese food. Their only question regarding the practice is likely to be: Do scat fans have a screw loose? . but scat sex between two uninfected parties is harmless. resulting in vomiting and an upset stomach. You can also expose yourself to STDs. can be passed through feces as well. such as gonorrhea and even HIV. in the case of bloody stools. but she doesn't anticipate health problems. "Naturally.K. Hepatitis A and B." Heidi says." Dookie-lover Heidi enjoys smearing shit on her pussy before balling her boyfriend." A cavalier attitude toward hygiene is common in the scat community." insists Angel X. the threat of sexually transmitted disease is always there. "The only negative experience up to now has been a slight allergic skin reaction my boyfriend gets sometimes. Most people don't need to consult a doctor to know that eating shit is dangerous (it's linked to typhus. both very dangerous.

it's entirely possible that she's full of shit." Heidi theorizes. when too much fuss is made about toilet training. "All of us are actually born with this attraction. "It's the way we are raised that puts a taboo on fetishes. so they make a battlefield out of toilet training. (This article originally appeared in the June 2001 issue of Hustler Magazine) Click here to go back to articles page. but a restrictive society represses our natural affinity for fudge love. She believes that shit is inherently sexy. They know that mother is upset if she finds the child painting with feces or smearing it around the bathroom or on the wall. any increase in the numbers of poop enthusiasts in the world would be a sign of success in the ongoing fight against sexual repression. "A child who doesn't feel loved would rather have negative attention than no attention at all. or on sex in general. . "It comes about primarily in early childhood." Heidi pooh-poohs this notion. Joyce Brothers has a theory about coprophilia that has become standard among mental-health experts." Brothers says. Of course." If Heidi is correct.Famed psychologist Dr.