Rabbi Weinberger 5773 Kina 31 ‫אש תוקד בקרבי‬

The Interrupted Journey

The contrast between the way things started when we left Mitzrayim and the disappointment as to what happened is so sad. What could have been and unfortunately it didn't work. Things became twisted and perverted. Initially we had Az Yashir and then left with a Kina of Yirmiyahu. This is the kina which contrasts the optimism of ‫ בצאתי ממצרים‬and finishes with the sadness of ‫בצאתי מירושלים‬. ‫במדבר פרק י‬ ‫(כט) ויאמר משה לחבב בן רעואל המדיני חתן משה נסעים אנחנו אל המקום אשר אמר יקוק אתו אתן לכם לכה אתנו‬ :‫והטבנו לך כי יקוק דבר טוב על ישראל‬ :‫(ל) ויאמר אליו לא אלך כי אם אל ארצי ואל מולדתי אלך‬ :‫(לא) ויאמר אל נא תעזב אתנו כי על כן ידעת חנתנו במדבר והיית לנו לעינים‬ :‫(לב) והיה כי תלך עמנו והיה הטוב ההוא אשר ייטיב יקוק עמנו והטבנו לך‬ :‫(לג) ויסעו מהר יקוק דרך שלשת ימים וארון ברית יקוק נסע לפניהם דרך שלשת ימים לתור להם מנוחה‬ ‫(לד) וענן יקוק עליהם יומם בנסעם מן המחנה‬ Rav Soloveitchik (who will be referred to as the Ruv from here on in) said a drasha on Parshas Behaloscha in the 60s which doesn't mention this kina, but the entire drasha reminds Rebbe of this kina and helps us feel this pain of what could have been vs the way it turns out. Moshe was trying to convince Yisro to stay with the Jews . The offer was ‫נסעים אנחנו אל המקום‬. Moshe said come with us to the special place and we will be good to you. Moshe was filled with optimism and certainty. He told Yisro you must come with us. The lack of doubt Moshe displayed is amazing. He thought the entire generation who left Mitzrayim will enter Israel in 3 days. The Ruv always gets upset when he reads these psukim. We will build the Beis Hamikdash and bring Mashiach. Moshe thought he would lead the Jews to an era in which there will be Yovel and Shmita etc. It will be an era without war, peaceful and quiet where the Kedusha of Hashem will be obvious. They were marching and singing in celebration with the blowing of the chatzotros. There was no talk of meraglim. Suddenly everything changes. There are the misoninim, complainers people talking about the good times in Mitzrayim, reminiscing about the fish back in Egypt. Then we have Parsha of ‫ויהי‬ ‫בנסע ארון‬. Everything becomes displaced. A journey of 3 days becomes a journey of thousands of years. Even when we are there we don't have everything. The Ruv describes the scene as a sudden change in the march. What happened? The Parsha of ‫ ויהי בנסע ארון‬is displaced and the journey becomes long. Moshe felt that the great march came to an end. There wasn’t a gezeira yet but Moshe knew it wouldn't be simple. Intuitively Moshe knew that the ‫ בצאתי ממצרים‬was done. The Ruv then got personal. The Ruv doesn’t have to say Moshe was a great Navi but here he knew even tough not revealed, The Ruv says he felt that way when his wife got sick. She was sick for four years but he was convinced that she would be able to overcome. He lived with hope and faith but something changed in the Ruv’s hope which was not in her health. Last1 year Yom
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The Ruv said this drasha the year after his wife and brother died

Rabbi Weinberger 5773 Kina 31 ‫אש תוקד בקרבי‬

Kippur the Ruv was holding a Sefer Torah during Kol Nidrei and when he gave a Talmid the Sefer Torah to place back in the Aron Hakodesh. When he put it back in it fell in the Aron Kodesh. The Ruv said then I knew that nothing would help my wife. ‫במדבר פרק יא‬ :‫(טו) ואם ככה את עשה לי הרגני נא הרג אם מצאתי חן בעיניך ואל אראה ברעתי‬ Back to Behaloscha. When people began to cry and weep about meat and Mitzrayim even though they saw the miracles Moshe knew this was the end. He knew he wouldn't see Eretz Yisroel . Moshe declares if this is what it is kill me. Why do I have to go through this whole business with them. ‫ואם ככה את עשה לי הרגני נא הרג‬. Chazal say by Eldad and Medad were prophesying in the camp. Yehoshua got angry. What did they say; Moshe will die and Yehoshua will take over. In short what it means ‫ נוסעים אנחנו‬will never happen even though he said it 24 hour earlier. Moshe knew that what Eldad and Medad said would be true. Then Parsha of ‫ ויהי בנסע ארון‬is displaced as shown by the two inverted Nuns. The march was inverted. The whole trip was inverted and Jewish history became inverted. We could never say ‫נוסעים אנחנו‬. Our entire life of Galus is inverted nuns. The Ruv was explaining the root of Tisha B’av. Expectations and hope and the shattering of hope. Contrast of hope and how quickly that becam unraveled. That is Galus. It begins with the optimism of ‫ בצאתי ממצרים‬and finishes with the sadness of ‫בצאתי מירושלים‬. Chasan and Kalah under a Chupa are at the beginning of a journey. ‫נסעים אנחנו‬. They go through the dancing and are anxious to start their lives. Then the same Chasan and Kalah are in Beisdin scheming against one another. The reality is the nuns are now inverted. The ‫ נסעים אנחנו‬has become the ‫ מתאננים‬and the ‫ בצאתי ממצרים‬has changed to ‫בצאתי מירושלים‬.. The same Kalah who used to brag to her friends is now ranking on the husband.. Another interrupted journey. Happy couple. They stay ‫בצאתי ממצרים‬. They have a kid and he has a great name. Kid goes to a great cheder. Turn the page. The boy is now 15 and the mother discovered the boy left his iPhone out and it is filled with shmutz. ‫בצאתי מירושלים‬. Baal tshuva was on their way and ‫ נוסעים אנחנו‬and now a disaster. Yesterday Rebbe got a call for a woman in Eretz Yisrael. They have a son in the army and when he came home for Shabbos he announced he doesn't believe in Hashem anymore. The optimism of ‫ בצאתי ממצרים‬is replaced with the sadness of ‫בצאתי מירושלים‬. In 1967 Rebbe remembers his father sitting with a transistor radio. Mordechai Gur announced Har HaBayit Byadeinu. Every Jew was on fire. People thought lets daven and learn the end of the Ramabm Hilchos Melachim and the Galus is over. And what became of that2. The precious children are stabbed to death. It still hasn't worked out.

2

Rebbe referenced quicky Tehilim kpitel 31 but I missed it

Rabbi Weinberger 5773 Kina 31 ‫אש תוקד בקרבי‬

‫איכה פרק א‬ ‫ ס‬:‫(טו) סלה כל אבירי אדני בקרבי קרא עלי מועד לשבר בחורי גת דרך אדני לבתולת בת יהודה‬ When we see a child dying it is another example of the galus. ‫קרא עלי מועד לשבר בחורי‬. Young kids get cancer. ‫ בצאתי ממצרים‬has changed to ‫ בצאתי מירושלים‬when the child is in the cancer ward. The deaht of young and righteous is more difficult than the destruction of the Beis Hamikdash. ‫סילוקן של הצדיקים יותר מחורבן בהמ"ק‬. Rav Shlomo Zalman Aurbach used to tell kids you don’t have to go to Tzfas to daven by Kivrei Tzadikim you can go to Har Herzel where all the dead are 18. Its hard to repair because the Nuns are inverted. It was a Journey interrupted. Rebbe visited Auschwitz and Birkenau where there was one huge room behind glass filled with suitcases. There were also dolls behind the glass. Rebbe couldn't forget or forgive the interrupted journey. The disappointments in life, overcoming difficulties in life. all go back to inverted nuns. This is Tisha Bav. We have to feel the pain of the interrupted journeys and the inverted nuns in history. Davening to Hashem that we should see the day when the suitcases are replaced, the soldier will believe and the 15 year olds brain will delete the memories of the shmutz on his Iphone.

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