2317, Monday, 2013-07-22 1 st journal, Mayan day 9 Ben / Reed
Shifting ~ Loving Self
HeartMath Science & Research Mind is Unkind – Loving the Self Free – Mastering Self-Talk WTF is Happening? July 2013 – Inelia's blog Video Journal
Frankly, friends, this one is written to check in with myself – to touch bases and discover what has changed since I last journaled. We can go on and on in our everyday consciousness – or even centered within a good bit – and yet not be in touch with our deep inner changes. That often takes either meditation or journaling, which to me is a form of meditation all its own. So what is going on? I've been feeling really different , but nothing I can precisely pin down. Haven't had loads of energy, that's for sure, so I've been getting a bit of extra rest , but not all that much. Haven't felt called to journal, though, so I haven't. Am experiencing a surge of energy, now, so I'm celebrating that by journaling this. For one thing, this 21-days-of Joy experiment of Inelia's (see previous journa l) has really brought about a shift in me. No wait – not the experiment, itself, but my chosen response is what brought on the shift. For years, now, I have lived in the flow of Heart energy, staying reasonably Now-centric and empty. Don't think that means all the time, though – it does not. “Reasonably” is the key word.
So, as I shared previously, rather that official participating, what with the daily vlogging it entails, I chose to participate by choosing Joy all the time . I set out to do what amounts to a 21day Joy meditation, devoting every Present moment to my intent to be in Joy. I've got to tell you, that's a big shift. Personal will , though still alive here, is very weak, so many things having just fallen away. More and more emptiness had been the way of it until Inelia's experiment came on the scene. It was just too good to miss, so that provided the fuel for this change. At this point I have no idea about the “future” - whether this new way of being will carry through into that or not – nor do I care, for that plays no part in Self & NowHere in Heart , so it falls off the radar for me. All I know is how things are going, now. And as I've started to write, I realize this is the main change I've been experiencing – that which has made the whole feel of my life so different, of late. Interesting. I don't know what I think of personal will anymore, either. While I firmly believe in choice and free will , I feel that there is a huge variety of ways that can be interpreted . Of course it starts out with the “ Who am I ” question, and how one answers that makes all the difference. When I answer that I am the divine , I am Source, that leads to interesting results. The personal I isn't the one making the bulk of my choices, these days. Instead, they tend to come from a deeper place – from Intuition Central, from Heart. So stepping into that mix with this choice for intentional Joy – well, it's just different. It's not a way I'm used to being. Not that I'm having any trouble with it – I am not. Things are going along just fine. It feels a bit awkward at times, though, as it's redefining me, in a way. Do you see? I hope I've made that plain enough. This is almost like cutting Source or Heart off at the pass and saying, “No thanks, I'll drive, now.” It's not really that – that's just how it can seem , since as you've often heard me say, Joy, a deep, internal Joy, is something that's available to us all , 24/7. It just takes a good, solid centering down to step into it. I promise, it is always available, always there.
So clearly, Source has nothing against being intentionally in Joy – else it wouldn't be so ever-present or at least available, within. I guess that reminding the self to keep touching down into that Joy has me a bit off-kilter, simply because I'm not used to it – to this way of being, this way of taking the reins. That's all that feels strange – but it's enough. I have found that it brings up some old subconscious stuff that had me thinking we needed to suffer more, or something – I'm not really clear on that, yet. Have to do some more quiet selfobserving before I can tell just what those old belief weeds are. There's no way we can pull the weeds until they're clearly identified – at least, that's been my experience of things. So we watch. It's really the seeing , the actual perception of things that is key in my life. Once things are seen and seen pretty clearly, then the alchemy , the magic can take place. I suppose it's ongoing in the background – or “underground” in the subconscious – all along, but that's not accessible – yet – to the conscious mind. So we watch. I am more and more aware of how very happy I am – yes, even in the midst of the physical pain that so far forms a backdrop for this life. I am deeply sincere when I share with you that I am one of the richest, wealthiest beings on the planet, just with the inner treasures I've managed to uncover. Yet these same treasures are available to us all. I love that part! It's still too early to say what the overall outcome of the Joy experiment will be for me. One of my greatest motivating factors for even being here, on this earth at this time, is Compassion of a very deep kind. So it delights me no end to recognize, when the thought appears now and then, that by my Joy I am feeding that in to the Group Mind, thus supporting every living being on earth, and even beyond, fractally. That's a great comfort to this particular Heart. Discovering what is really and truly and deeply important to us – that's a beautiful treasure that the daily grind will keep from us if we let it. Finding, or rather carving out that quiet time , that self time, is an evidence of true Love for the self – and we all require that. I don't see ascension happening without it, since simply
everything starts within. How are you doing on Self Love ? Do you consider the self worthy of such Love? If you ask the brain, it will likely say, “no” - so don't ask it! Go to Heart for this, and all such things. We've got to get away from so much attention to mind , and place that attention deeper within. Let us all remember, together, that what we focus on grows and expands. If we want the mind's hold on us to expand, then let's keep thinking . Otherwise, let's make the shift from the head into the Heart . That's my choice, anyway. What is yours? How many steps into real Self Love have you taken, recently? Forget the past – let's stay more with the NowHere , and simply start taking those steps. Come on – we all know how to love . We all have a spouse, a child, a dog or a mouse – something that we love ever so deeply. We know how that feels , and how that motivates us to treat that one – the little thoughtful things we do to express it. As we set our powerful intent – for, as Source, your intent is powerful – to Love the Self, let us self-observe the results of that. Watch for them! It can be fun. One thing is to give yourself more rest time. Mind is always driving, pushing, always out ahead with the next thing, and the next, and the next – it never ends. We can turn that off now and then. We don't have to be perfect at it, but even five minutes here and there can make a serious difference over time. You won't know until you do it, though. Another thing you'll discover the self doing is stopping mind in the midst of its self -abuse . Come on – you know mind is unkind . It can't help it – yet – since it was brought up to be like that. Now that we're reprogramming the self, however, those things are changing right under our noses. We're getting kinder to self. We're refusing to take the abuse. There are all sorts of ways, little and large, you can discover once you get serious about this self-observing stuff. It's really a very useful key to bringing yourself back into the NowHere – just being observant, with the focus turned within , instead of without. Observing what's on the outside isn't a very good idea. It doesn't
pack the punch that turning inward delivers. Check it out. You may even find that you're far less interested , these days, in the news and what the major media delivers via TV and radio, and even Internet. You may discover yourself cruising the alternative media more and more. That's another way of loving, not only the self, but the whole world, as well. Whatever decisions we make to be kinder, more loving toward the self, can also be seen as ways we're being kinder to Life – to the All . Though the conscious mind forgets it at times, the fact is we're all fractally linked up, very interconnected . We can't help influencing all of Life by whatever we do. It's just built in. So that part is nice, too. That doesn't mean we don't honor our less than stellar feelings , though. Notice, now – I said feelings, not thoughts. I dishonor my less than stellar thoughts quite regularly. It is our feelings that count for a whole lot more than thought. Our feelings are much closer to heart. By the way, did you know you have four hearts ? Yeah, I added them up the other day, and came up with four. Can you name them? The first one, to me, would be the cosmic sort of portal or space I'm calling capital-H Heart . Love that spot. Next would be the heart chakra , if we're traveling down in the dimensions. Right with that one would be what is called the High Heart , another chakra in the area of the thymus gland. Finally, we can't leave out the physical body's heart , which is hugely powerful. For those who don't know, it's magnetic field is roughly 5,000 times greater than that of the brain. It's electrical field is hundreds of times greater – forgot the precise number. These (figures on electrical & magnetic field strengths) are from HeartMath , by the way, so they are from science, not metaphysics. So all in all that makes four hearts. Who'd a thunk it, huh? What a trip! Yet there you go, and we've had them functioning all along , without us being aware of more than one or two, in most cases. Pretty darn neat, if you ask me. I'm loving that. Four is the number of earth , of Gaia, of matter, itself – the square, the four directions, etc. It is both sacred and such a solid, grounded and grounding number. I think it's great that it's
associated with heart. It goes to show us how very grounding being in heart – in any of them – can be. Times are challenging , folks. We all know that. But do we cut the self any slack in the midst of it all? I'm learning to do a lot more of that, and I'm loving it. It's a really great feeling , all around. As we get more and more out from under the domination of the unkindness of mind, life is simply better , all around. We have much more freedom – more breathing room :) Namaste ~♥~
The Great Shift, intentional Joy, move head to Heart, what is most important to you, reprogramming mind, focus of attention, subconscious & unconscious, Self & NowHere in Heart, personal will, choice & free will, Breathing Room, mind is unkind, 21-day Joy experiment, vision is magic or alchemical, Source God or Spirit, OWN being divine, watch and observe, awaken or enlighten, flexible perspective, live from Heart, surrender beliefs, abandon expectations