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JULY 2013, VOL. 11 ISSUE 5

This husband and wife team now offer Baton Rouge and Ascension Parish a complete line of dermatology services. Dr.Massengale has over a decade of medical and surgical dermatology experience while Dr Zedlitz offers the latest in cosmetic dermatology/skin rejuvenation. Together, they will share office space in both Prairieville and Baton Rouge.

Acne Treatment

Coolsculpting Procedure






Skin Rashes Eczema Psoriasis Acne Rosacea Contact Dermatitis Warts/Molluscum

Nevi Moles Benign (non-cancerous) Skin lesions Malignant (cancerous) Skin lesions

• One on One Skin Consultations • Computerized Skin Analysis • Chemical Peels • Exilis

• Intense Pulsed Light (IPL) • Non-Ablative Skin Resurfacing • Ulthera • Fractionated CO2 Laser Resurfacing

• Coolsculpting • Botox, Xeomin, Dysport • Fillers • Customized Facials

Publisher / Editor Mike Strong Sales Manager Dottie Godberry Staff Photographer Jimmy Dunkley

Table of Contents
DREAMS COME TRUE ...........4 ASCENSION HOUSEWISE .....10 SWEET EYES W/ TANYA.... ....12 ASK YOUR REALTOR ............. 18


Contributing Writers Bill Delaune Marilyn Bowman Linda Melancon Calvin Bessonett

ASCENSION ECONOMICS.................22 JAMMIN’ WITH GOOSIE........ 25 BILL DELAUNE........................26 THOUGHTS FROM BULLY ....34 SWAMP POP INTERVIEWS.... 38

Ron Baratini Bully
Goosie Guice Orhan McMillan Kellie Seymour Tanya Stilley Roland Doucet Karlin O’Neal Jimmy Dunkley

For Advertising Information Please call: 225-622-1324

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Note: Features in this publication labeled “advertorial” are paid for editorials. All Rights Reserved. Opinions expressed are not necessarily those of the publisher, editor or staff of Ascension Magazine

18386 Little Prairie Rd. Prairieville, LA 70769

Dreams Really Can Come True
Publishers Note: As a cancer survivor I can relate to the struggles of a life threatning illness, however, I am a grown man. I can’t even imagine what these kids endure. With the assistance of Becky Prejean of Dreams Come True, I received these remarkable stories and photos of heroic kids. Next month the 17th Annual Dreams Come True Fundraiser

Dreams Come True Fundraiser Dance will be held at Lamar Dixon. On Saturday, August 17th.
Even thou many of these kids recover from their illness, the side effects from the treatments can have life long consiquences. These young warriors battle on-and-on the rest of their lives. As a father I can’t imagine the torment that these families go through. Fortunantly, my son and family arebhealthy and count my blessings. About 6 years ago I got involved in Dreams Come True

Dance will be held at Lamar Dixon. On Saturday, August 17th. The doors open at 6 and the dance starts at 7 till 11. The Na Na Sha Band will perform to raise money for these kids and families that have been struck with a traumatic illness. Dreams Come True is an organization that helps kids receive wishes that are nomally out of reach for the families during their time of crisis.

What a great dream. Her mom and dad both work at a school in St. Amant.

Abigail Ragusa is 19, started her dream when she was 17; for various reasons the dream kept getting pushed back. Her dream was to just practice with WICKED. Due to various situations the dream was finally granted and it was so worth

it!!! WICKED came to New Orleans and not only did they let her practice, they let her perform in an evening show at the Mahalia Jackson Theater. Abigail has Lymphoma and

was diagnosed in 2012. We hope she continues progress and that by helping her dream come true everything she ever wanted comes true.

Here is an awesome dream to come true. Kaylon is a 18 years old. We did a shopping dream for

was avery touching ceremony and his principle attended. On MAY 31, 2013 Kaylon received a heart!!!! He is doing well, progressing slowly but on the road to recovery. He is still in New Orleans for a few more months. On May 25th Ochsner gave him a graduation. He was still waiting for a heart and could not go back to his home and graduate with his class mates. It 4

him when he was 17. We made this happen because he was in New Orleans at Ochsner Hospital and could not leave New Orleans because he was waiting for a heart. We did his dream in June of 2012.

and it has been a wonderful, rewarding experience. The fundraiser needs help raising as much money as possible to provide the dreams and wishes of these kids. The dance has 3 different level sponsorships that companies or individuals can purchase. These are the Dream, Gold and Silver Sponsorship. Dream Sponsorship - $1500 This monetary donation funds a child’s dream. This will entitle you to an opportunity to participate in the presentation of a child’s dream, official recognition, a plaque, and 10 reserved VIP dance tickets and front row table hostess, and 20 general admission tickets. (Must have VIP ticket at the door to enter the VIP section.) Gold Sponsorship - $1000 This will entitle you to official recognition, a plaque, 10 reserved dance tickets and one reserved table, along with 10 general admission tickets.

Donovan wanted to go to Disney. He and his family just returned. He has a great family. Both parents work hard and it was a pleasure to assist Donovan with his dream.

Donovan Duncan is 6 and was diagnosis with Wilms Tumor, and he is doing great. This kid has so much energy. His dad manages a shoe store at Tanger Outlet. He loves soccer, video games, puzzles, Reese’s peanut butter cups and Math. His favorite

color is green. His favorite super hero is the Incredible Hulk. His biggest dream is to be an architect when he grows up.


Rachael is a local resident of Ascension Parish and lives on Bluff Road. When Rachael was interviewed she requested a 17th birthday party. WOW, Dreams Come True provided her with a party she will not forget. The theme was "Role out the Red Carpet" and everyone had a great time. Louisiana State Police provided a limousine to escort Rachael and her date to the party. Rachael was diagnosed with a Brain Tumor and now she is doing great.


We performed her dream when she was 2 ½ years old. She was not expected to live to see her third birthday and thank you Jesus she is still with us. With the help of State Police Troop A, we gave her a Princess Party!!! OMG, It was unbelievable, The Hyatt next to

Ralph and Kacoo’s donated the facility and state police picked her up in a limo and escorted her to the Hyatt and had all the TV Stations there waiting for her to get out the limo. Dzyrie’s diagnosis is: Idiopathic Pulmonary Hemosiderosis and she is a miracle. This is what Dreams Come True is all about.

Silver Sponsorship - $500 This will entitle you to official recognition at the dance, a plaque, and 20 general admission dance tickets. Dreams Come True could use your help. Whether you can donate or volunteer, your help will be truly appreciated. Contact Becky Prejean at 614-8197 or Max Himmel at 673-8777 or cell 715-2881.




First Impressions ALWAYS Count!
Whether your foyer is small or large, entrance areas to your home should be interesting and present an exciting preview of what’s to come. One of the most important considerations in designing a foyer space, is to keep in mind how much of the surrounding rooms you see from the foyer. Here are a few do’s and don’ts to help you make your home’s entry space a memorable first impression! Mirrors? Yes! And don’t skimp on the size! A handsomely framed mirror over a chest or table is always an excellent design option. If your entry way is small, consider

mirroring closet doors. And in situations where your front door opens into the living space, try to create a foyer with a mirrored folding screen.

Drama? Yes! Do something dramatic and exciting with your walls. If your wall space is somewhat limited, consider

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your home’s other rooms! Luxury? Yes! Have you ever considered adding portieres at your foyer doorway? Portieres are drapery panels that not only provide privacy and warmth when closed, but softness and luxury when opuened. Portieres are a great design option to consider when your foyer opens to an adjacent room via a wide doorway. splurging on an exquisite wall covering to set the stage. And how about continuing your wall covering pattern on the ceiling! What a great way to incorporate the other colors and mood of Try following these do’s and don’ts and you’ll be well on your way to having a grand entrance that will certainly make a lasting impression!

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This 3250 square foot, mediterranean style home features four bedrooms and four bathrooms situated on the sixth pin of the beautiful Lakes Golf Course. Great three way split floor plan with bonus room and attached bath upstairs. This home features open floor plan with arched openings into the formal dining, and the family den area. Crown molding featured throughout the home. Next to the large kitchen lies an open breakfast area. Large picture windows frame the west side of the home for amazing sunsets. The den features a granite fireplace with custom cabinets and 14 foot ceilings in the main living area. The kitchen boasts granite counter tops, stainless steel appliances, convection oven, an eat in island, and gas cooktop. Adjacent to the kitchen is a sparkling butler’s pantry. The large laundry room features a sink as well as large food pantry and linen closet just down the hall from the fourth bedroom. Off the large master bedroom lies the master bathroom which has a sitting area, his and her granite countertops, separate shower and jetted tub. Just off the master bath is a large walk in with built in cabinets. Just past the foyer are two bedrooms with a shared bathroom and walk in closests. The large master bedroom faces the gorgeous back yard which is accentuated with wrought iron fencing, large covered patio space, relaxing water fountain, lush landscaping, salt water pool and ceiling fan. Tropical landscaping gives this home excellent curb appeal. It also offers a three car garage and ample storage.

Features: 3250 living square feet • 2 story with golf course view • 4 BR 4BA • Saltwater pool with stained concrete • Perfectly situated on the Lakes course • Built in bookcases and entertainment center • Gas fireplace in main living • Stainless steel appliances, gas cooktop and convection oven • Granite throughout kitchen and master bath • Formal Dining Breakfast nook • Butler's Pantry • Tropical landscaping • Bonus room with attached full bath • New Paint throughout interior


wetting your hair, try Phyto’s Protective Sun Veil, available online for around $22.00. This gives your hair and scalp ultra violet protection without weighing it down. It smells great and also adds a lot of shine to your hair. Just make sure if you sweat a lot or swim, reapply.

It’s All About the Hair!
Benefits of Biotin
I’m on a mission to grow some hair. Yes, I have the kind you buy and clip in, but it’s just not the same. Every time I put in my clip ins and a breeze blows, you see the the clips and then there’s no hiding! Biotin is sometimes known as a B vitamin or vitamin K. It’s in the group of B complex vitamins and help your body to process energy and carry carbon dioxide through your body. Bitotin can also help with blood glucose production, which is why some some physicians actually prescribe Biotin to help with metabolism. Biotin known primarily to create strong hair skin and nails, but more specifically, it can reduce hair loss, create thicker hair in areas where it was formerly thinning, grow stronger and healthier hair, and add more shine to your hair. But did you know that it is also a catalyst in a number of metabolic reactions? Biotin will help maintain healthy blood sugar levels; therefore, higher doses are often recommended to diabetics. Biotin also helps maintain a healthy heart by reducing cholesterol levels in the body, revitalize the skin, combats eczema, and dandruff.

The recommended dose of Biotin is 5,000 mcg taken daily. It’s suggested that you take 50% at breakfast and 50% at supper. Don’t feel like purchasing a supplement? You can find Biotin in liver, cauliflower, salmon, carrots, bananas, soy flour, cereals, and yeast.

Sun, Sand and Strands
I always talk a lot about protecting your hair. That’s really important during the summer months, when you’re more likely to put your strands through a lot of damage due to chlorine, wind, salt water, and lots of sun. One day in the past few weeks, I looked at myself in the mirror and all my hilights had gotten so light, I looked like a cotton top. So, I had to go get some low lights and boy what a difference that made. Just goes to prove what a tremendous impact the sun can have on your locks. UVA rays can damage the hair cortex's that give hair its strength and elasticity. It can also damage the color pigments that create natural hair color, which is why I got my cotton top! Rays can also burn the hair cutile and burn the scalp when unprotected. For a quick and easy to use product that doesn’t require

If you do partake in lots of sun and sand, which who doesn’t, try to deep condition right after. Products like, It’s A Ten really makes your hair soft and smooth. It’s a deep conditioning treatment and available at retail outlets like CVS and Walgreens and it’s usually around $30.00. The instructions on this product states to wash your hair, apply the product, leave in for at least 5 to 10 minutes and rinse. For extra damaged hair, I like to apply the product to dry hair, put hair in a bun and sleep with it overnight. That really works! This summer also try to let your hair dry as much as possible. You can also protect those locks putting your hair up in a braid, a high pony tail or chignon! These styles are sheik, cool, and they protect your locks from all that sun damage. For quick and easy tutorials, go to or pinterest and manage your locks in no time!

Keepin' it real
The newest hair products are great but I always like to end my column on a "real" note. Don't get hung up on your hair or yourself. Every time I think I have a bad hair day, I think about the women that don't have hair because of chemotherapy, alopecia or some other disease or skin condition. You are NOT your hair, you are not your make up, you are who you are to the core. It's all about the heart that's important. When you're beautiful on the inside, real and genuine people see that and nothing else. Take care of yourself, but love who you are in a healthy way from the inside out.


Thalia "Tex" Seggelink, one of the authors, graduated from LSU's Fine Arts program in theater. Kim "Blaze" Ritchie Spencer never lived here, but has relatives and has loves Louisiana. I'd like to share a letter that a New Orleans mother, Rainna Moran, wrote to WWL about the tour: According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), as of April 2013 the latest figures for the rates of Autism are 1:50 children, 1:33 boys. This number has continued to rise at an extremely alarming rate. It has risen 600% in my lifetime! Unfortunately, I now know more than I ever wanted to know about Autism. My youngest son was diagnosed at 22 months old and we have been through a difficult journey thus far. Having your child receive this diagnosis makes you feel very alone and I found myself reaching out to other mothers and fathers on FB to try and relate to someone. That's when I found The Thinking Moms' Revolution. They are a group of 23 moms (and one awesome dad!) from Montana to Malaysia that have come together to write a book titled "The Thinking Moms' Revolution: Autism Beyond the Spectrum". In each chapter of the book a different mom discusses her family's journey through Autism along with the personal struggles and successes. This book offers hope and is not just for people affected by Autism in their life. It's for everyone! You'll laugh, you'll cry, and most importantly your heart will be touched and moved to help us take action for our kids. These moms speak for us parents. They were brave enough to put their stories, and hearts and souls out there for the world to see and judge. The chapters of this book are filled with very inspiring stories of love and determination. TMR authors will be here in Louisiana this month for a book signing tour! On July 18th they will be Uptown at Garden District Book Shop from 6-7:30pm. On July 19th they will be in Mandeville at Barnes and Noble from 7-9pm. On July

20th they will be in Baton Rouge at (Citiplace) Barnes and Noble from 1-4pm. This will be an excellent opportunity for parents of children with Autism who live in this community to connect with each other and to relate to others that

are going through some the same struggles that ASD presents in our lives. Books will be available for purchase on the day of the event, but you can also order online. Please contact me if you are able to air this story. The two authors who will be in town for the signing would also love to be on air for an interview. They both have lots of experience with television appearances. As the parent of a child on the spectrum who lives in this community, I think this information could be extremely helpful for you to at least air the dates and times of the events.

Here are the dates: Thursday, July 18th 6-7:30 PM

Garden District Book Shop in New Orleans 2727 Prytania St., New Orleans, LA 70130 (504) 895-2266

Friday, July 19th at 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm Barnes and Noble in Mandeville 3414 Hwy 190, Mandeville, LA 70471 (985) 626-8884

Saturday, July 20th 1-4 pm

Barnes and Noble in Baton Rouge (Citiplace) 2590 Citiplace Ct., Baton Rouge, LA (225) 926-2600



By Linda Melancon
Louisiana, most married couples are subject to the regime and they own at least some of their joint property as community property and they also have debt that is considered community debt. They may also have separate property and separate debt even though they are married. With regard to property, if the property is acquired by one spouse prior to the marriage, it remains the separate property of the spouse who purchased it even after they are married. This can be a trap for the unwary. Oftentimes, one spouse will purchase a house before marriage that will become both spouses home after they marry. Both spouses income will often be used to pay the mortgage, make improvements to and maintain the home. However, these payments will not change the nature of the property from separate to community and the spouse who did not own the house prior to marriage but who has used their income for house expenses, may find their rights to the home limited if the spouses divorce or if the spouse who purchased the property before marriage dies. To prevent this from happening, the spouse who owns the house can donate one-half of it to the

other spouse to make it community property. Then upon either divorce or death, the non-owner spouse will have rights to the house. As an alternative, the owner spouse can execute a will leaving a usufruct (or right to use) to the non-owner spouse. This would provide protection upon death but not divorce. Property that is acquired during the marriage by inheritance or by gift to only one spouse is also classified as separate and not community property. Additionally, money that is paid to a spouse during the marriage for pain and suffering arising out of an accident is the separate property of the spouse who had the pain and suffering. Property that is acquired during the marriage with the separate funds of one of the spouses is also considered the separate property of the spouse whose funds were used to acquire it. Other than these instances, almost all other property acquired by either spouse during the marriage is classified as community property that is subject to special community property laws. These community property laws are particularly important when planning your estate because you can only transmit what you own upon your death. For most married couples, that means when one spouse dies without a will, onehalf of the community property – one-half of the house, the vehicles, the bank accounts, etc. – will pass

to the deceased spouse’s children with the surviving spouse receiving a usufruct over that one-half. This is often not what married couples want to happen. Therefore, they may want to execute a will giving their surviving spouse ownership of their one-half of the community property. If a spouse without a will dies with separate property, it will pass to his or her heirs without the surviving spouse receiving a usufruct over it. This can also be changed by a will if that is the desired result. As you can see, classification of property as separate or community can make a big difference in what happens to it upon the death of a spouse. When you are planning your estate, you need to make sure you inform those you are working with whether your property is owned as community property or separate property and you should work with professionals who are well-versed in the differences between the two.
Ms. Melancon has engaged in the practice of law in Louisiana for the past 14 years. The primary focus of her practice is estate planning, special needs planning, elder law and probate. She is also accredited by the VA to give advice regarding veterans’ benefits. For more information, please contact her at 744-0027 or visit her website at or her facebook page at: ville-La/Legacy-Center-ofLouisiana/267942070212.

Last month, we discussed the basics of community property law and how vital it is to classify property as community or separate. We learned that if you are married, unless you opt out of community property law in Louisiana, it will apply to you. This month, we are going to examine some other attributes of community property such as what property is classified as community and what property is classified as separate and learn some common pitfalls that occur as a result of these classifications. Since the nature of the community property regime is automatic upon marriage or relocation to


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Hey Dr. Rob, I Love What You Do for Me.


with Marilyn Bowman

r o t l Rea

Most of us schedule an annual personal physical with our family doctor. When you consider the amount of time your family spends at home, it makes total sense to give your home an annual physical as well. Here is a list of some basic healthy house issues to assist you in performing your home’s physical. Set aside some time to review the following:

gas logs used in many homes in the south. - Security Systems. All too often homeowners disengage their security alarm to avoid nuisance calls. This puts them at a security risk. If this is the case in your home, check with an alarm company to see if other options are better suited for your family.

• Humidifiers.

Prepare these essential items for routine activities or emergencies: - First Aid Kit - Family Contact List - House Equipment Maintenance Information - Babysitter Information - Emergency Evacuation Kit - Medial and Financial Records Every house is different, but there are some common elements every homeowner can include on their annual physical of their home. • Check the grading and drainage around the foundation • Seal driveway and walkway cracks • Check fencing and gates • Check and trim trees near the house • Check for deteriorating/ damaged siding • Check for loose, damaged, or missing roofing and flashings • Clean all gutters and leaders • Check weather-stripping and seals on all windows and doors • Insulate water lines that are subject to freezing • Check condition of the water heater • Check ventilation openings for nests, blockage. • While this list is not comprehensive, it’s a good start to identifying some potential trouble spots in any home.


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Humidifiers add moisture to house air and are typically needed when a warm air heating system is operational. - This moisture control device should be checked regularly during usage periods. - Check to make sure there is no leakage or overflowing of water onto the heating system and all drain lines properly dispose of the water.

• Alarms/Detectors
Check all safety and security alarms regularly; replace older alarms (after five years or as otherwise recommended by the manufacturer): - Smoke/Fire Alarms. These are your family’s first line of defense/warning in the event of a fire/smoke emergency. Change the batteries in all of your smoke/fire alarms at least annually. Set a regular date when all are changed each year. - CO Monitors. Carbon Monoxide is odorless and colorless. A CO detector is the only way to identify elevated levels of CO in your home before physical injury occurs. If you don’t have CO monitors protecting your home from this toxic gas, you should act immediately and install them in strategic locations near the sleeping areas and other points recommended by the manufacturer or local officials. Check that presently installed units are operational. These CO monitors have become increasingly popular with ventless


Louisiana Residents serve a Dose of Humanity
America, home of the free, brave and home of 12 christians that answered the calling of a community in need. There were 12 humble men that went as the Cooking For Christ Ministry, from Healing Place Church in Baton Rouge, La. They served over 17,000 hot meals over a period of 4 days. In feeding the community huge pots were required and needed. Each pot would serve 750 plates each. They cooked north of Moore near Oklahoma City and delivered the food in huge ice chest to a distribution center south of Moore. From there the Harvest Church boxed the food in plates and delivered them to people in need. After debris was cleared, the group was given a tour of the destruction. (1-1/2” miles wide x 18 miles long). It was heart breaking to see miles and miles of lumber tangled like spaghetti. The Cooking For Christ Ministry cooked Jambalaya, Chili, Dirty Rice, Porking Beans, Pulled Pork, Barbecue Chicken, White beans, ect.

The flag is this photo was flown in New York when Cooking For Christ Ministry cooked for 911.

The Louisisana community is always ready to assist other communities in need. Lord knows we have our share of disasters but our commitment to family, Christ and humanity keeps us centered and willing to help when ever needed. Good luck to our many Oklahoma friends and if you need help again, give us a call.

By Calvin Bessonet, DDS,FAGD

much of the procedure. • Deep sedation -- you are on the edge of consciousness but can still be awakened. • General anesthesia -- you are completely unconscious.

Does the thought of having your teeth fixed make your entire body tense with fear? Would you rather endure the agony of a toothache than step foot in a dentist's office? You're not alone. A lot of people are so phobic about going to the dentist that they prefer not to have any treatment. For people who avoid dentists like the plague, sedation dentistry may take away some of their anxiety. Sedation can be used for everything from invasive procedures to a simple teeth cleaning. How it's used depends on the severity of the fear.

What Types of Sedation Are Used in Dentistry?

What Is Sedation Dentistry?

Sedation dentistry uses medication to help patients relax during dental procedures. It's sometimes referred to as "sleep dentistry.” The levels of sedation used include: • Minimal sedation -- you are awake but relaxed. • Moderate sedation (formerly called "conscious sedation") -You may slur your words when speaking and not remember

The following types of sedation are used in dentistry: • Inhaled minimal sedation. You breathe nitrous oxide -otherwise known as "laughing gas" -- combined with oxygen through a mask that's placed over your nose. The gas helps you relax. Your dentist can control the amount of sedation you receive, and the gas tends to wear off quickly. This is the only form of sedation where you may be able to drive yourself home after the procedure. • Oral sedation. Depending on the total dose given, oral sedation can range from minimal to moderate. For minimal sedation, you take a pill. Typically, the pill is Halcion, which is a member of the same drug family as Valium, and it's usually taken about an hour before the procedure. The pill will make you drowsy, although you'll still be awake. A larger dose may be given to produce moderate sedation. This is the type of anesthesia most common-

ly associated with sedation dentistry. Some people become groggy enough from moderate oral sedation to actually fall asleep during the procedure. They usually can, though, be awakened with a gentle shake. • IV moderate sedation. You receive the sedative drug through a vein, so it goes to work more quickly. This method allows the dentist to continually adjust the level of sedation. • Deep sedation and general anesthesia. You will get medications that will make you either almost unconscious or totally unconscious -- deeply asleep -- during the procedure. While you are under general anesthesia, you cannot easily be awakened until the effects of the anesthesia wear off or are reversed with medication. Regardless of which type of sedation you receive, you'll also typically need a local anesthetic -numbing medication at the site where the dentist is working in the mouth -- to relieve pain if the procedure causes any discomfort.

Sedation dentistry may also be appropriate for people who: - have a low pain threshold - can't sit still in the dentist's chair - have very sensitive teeth - have a bad gag reflex - need a large amount of dental work completed Sometimes, children are given sedation if they are terrified of going to the dentist or refuse to cooperate during the visit. Nitrous oxide tends to be safe in children, and just about any dentist can administer it.

Can Any Dentist Perform Sedation?

Sedation is most appropriate for people with a real fear or anxiety that is preventing them from going to the dentist.

Who Can Have Sedation at the Dentist's?

Many states require dentists to hold permits in order to perform sedation. It's important to make sure that your dentist is trained and qualified to administer the type of sedation you will be receiving. The dentist should monitor your vital signs during the procedure following the American Dental Association's guidelines. The dentist should also have oxygen -- artificial ventilation -- and drugs that reverse the effects of sedation on hand in case you need them.

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Mis-spelled and Mis-defined
According to the dictionary the word camp is any tent, hut, or other simple shelter to live in for a short period of time to enjoy an outdoor lifestyle. I recently ran into a friend of mine at a convenience store one evening. He and I had gone on several offshore fishing trips in the past. When asked if he had gone fishing lately, he mentioned that he had bought a camp in the Lake Verret area. Because he had been working on the camp, he had not been fishing in a while. I can't tell you how many people I know that spend their weekends working on their camps. If you're the kind of person who enjoys seeing hard work being done, then go around an area that has a lot of camps. Someone is always hammering, sawing, cutting grass, burning trash or doing some other type of strenuous activity. In a matter of twenty-five years, myself and a few other people actually built five camps in the marsh at Venice, LA. Although these camps were primitive, there was always some work that had to be done each time we went to them. About every five years we would have to rebuild because of hurricane tides or Mississippi River flooding. During those years we were also involved in working on camps in Belle River, Tensas, and at hunting lease camps that we belonged to. After the fifth camp at Venice was destroyed by Hurricane George, I was pushed by my other two partners to help rebuild. I told them that it was over for me. I wasn't rebuilding any more camps and I would just be staying in a hotel for my trips to that area. I'm glad I made that decision because Hurricane Katrina came three years later. I must admit that the years at the camp in Venice were undoubtedly the best years of my life. All night long you could hear ducks and geese squawk back to each other along with fish splashing in the water. You could fish or crab from the bank in the morning, paddle a pirogue a couple hundred yards and kill your limit of ducks. Most nights included a great meal and a full blown jam session along with guitars, harmonicas, drums made of buckets, pots and pans, and a bass made from a bucket, nylon string and willow limb. It was not uncommon to wake up in the morning and find someone sleeping in the mud or in the boat, with a raccoon sleeping on the side of him. It was incredible! Being at the camp and living in that environment was a fantastic feeling, one that I haven't experienced since those days. Today I am still involved with work days around the camp at one of my hunting leases. Although I'd rather be fishing or doing something else on those days, I do understand that these things need to be done. Comfort and enjoyment depend on it for the upcoming hunting season. I do believe that the word camp has been misspelled and misdefined. It should have been called "work" and defined as an effort in doing or making something- something to do- a particular task, job, or undertaking. The definitions are a long list and it did include accomplishment but nowhere did I see the word enjoyment.....
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Until next time. "Gotta go to the hunting camp To make a WORK day... See you later!" James "Goosie" Guice
Ascension Outdoors Air Times
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Doug & Sally

“Aside from that, Ms. Lincoln, How Did You Enjoy the Play”
by Bill Delaune

At 5:10 p.m. on Tuesday, June 18, at Ameritrade Park in Omaha, Nebraska, LSU’s last gasp of breath in the College World Series-already on life support-went flatlined. And to paraphrase the shortest verse in the King James Bible (John, chapter 11, verse 35 for ye of little faith) -Omaha wept. The texts started to pour in around 5:15-the first from my lovely daughter-in-law Macy who only two days earlier had sent me a sweet Father’s Day message… “Dear Mr. Bill, When the Tigers go back to Omaha, I respectfully ask you to stay home.” The next from my former player and White Road neighbor Kurt… “U can NOT go back!!” Then from my ex-catcher and tailgating buddy Mike… “U are officially banned from Omaha!”

And even an anonymous… “Black cat, black snake-you name it. You are officially the biggest Raven of all time!” Boy, my first time to Omaha and I get the blame for dead bats, bad bunts and a park bigger than Yellowstone. Why not blame Skip Bertman for sticking his name on that field with war hero Alex Box? Aren’t you supposed to die first? That question was once posed to the inimitable Yogi Berra after a St. Louis park was named after him. “Yeah, but my arm died in 1962,” deadpanned Yogi. But this story is not about the games. This is about the Omaha Odyssey and the adventures. As Homer (the Greek, not what you can’t hit in the CWS) once said, “It is not the destination that is important, but the journey.” And mine began on…

Friday, June 14 My desperate situation was almost like the atheist’s epitaph“All dressed up and nowhere to go”. With some help from my brother-in-law Jack and a military connection in Omaha, I had- as that great philosopher Al Kling used to say-fallen into two CWS tickets backwards. The only problem was I didn’t have a ride. With the Beatles’ classic “Ticket to Ride” pounding in my brain, I tried to trade-well-one ticket for a ride to Omaha. One by one, my possibilities slipped away leaving me with the song’s first line-“I think I’m gonna be sad, I think it’s today…” Enter my brother Nick who had regaled us with stories of his 2009 CWS experience and the brother of one of his friends who had generously opened up his home to Nick and company. “Call this number in Nebraska,” instructed my now

favorite brother. “Tell him you know me.” I did as coached and then listened-a bit speechless for once in my life-as a total stranger Tom Stringenz offered me everything but a key to the city. Tom: “So you’re coming for the first two games?” (Nick was holding off for the championship series.) Me: “Uh, yeah…” Tom: “So you’re staying with us (a statement, not a question). Me: “I-I guess…” Tom: “And we’ll pick you up at the airport Saturday-just call when you get in. Me: “Okay, I just…” Tom: “Then it’s all set. See you tomorrow.” Great-now with the money I’d saved on gas and hotel rooms, I had enough money to fly-if there was an available flight at this late date. Not to worry. My make-


things-happen wife Priceline Pam was already booking me on the last seat of a Delta flight leaving New Orleans the next day. I never ate the “Last Mango in Paris” or took “the last plane out of Saigon” like Jimmy Buffet’s old rounder in the song. But I got the last seat on the last plane for Omaha on… Saturday, June 15 And who to my wandering eyes should appear across the aisle from me but some veteran Tiger tailgaters dating back to the 80’s including Baton Rouge judge Brick Wall. “Hey, Bill, you got tickets? Where are you staying? Who’s picking you up?” came the usual questions from the bench. “Not in hand. I don’t know. I’m not sure.” I stuttered unsurely. “Gee, Bill, you haven’t changed a bit,” was the verdict. There was also a nice lady from N.C. State on the flight from Atlanta who showed us a Wolfpack cheer and guaranteed a win over rival North Carolina in LSU’s side of the bracket. “It took those (expletives deleted) 18 innings to beat us in the ACC Tournament and we owe those (expletives deleted) a good ass-whipping,” she declared not so demurely. I called Tom when we landed and he picked me up in a black Escalade and whisked me away to a raucous party scene in downtown Omaha. LSU didn’t play until the following night but the Tiger colors were everywhere. In a battle of two basketball powers, Indiana had just beaten Louisville (“We hit our free throws down the stretch,” joked one happy Hoosier.) and the Big Ten joined the party. Speaking of the Big Ten, Tom and his lovely wife Mandy pointed out the incredible number of Nebraska (and Creighton) supporters who had been in and around the ballpark despite not having a local rooting interest. With that beautiful park and the Mardi Gras atmosphere added to the rabid local support, it’s no wonder Omaha has the CWS locked up for the next 25 years. Sunday, June 16 I woke up in Papillion (rhymes with Ma-million-not like the Steve McQueen movie), about 20 miles south of Omaha, and looked out my window to see-a beach? It was not a mirage but there was sure enough sand in the

backyard to create a desert effect. And at the edge of the sandy expanse was a boat, some jet skis and a party barge-or a pontoon as it’s called everywhere except Diversion Canal-complete with scattered inner tubes, life jackets and everything you’d need for a day on the river-unless you happened to live on a beautiful Nebraska lake. And I thought Omaha Beach was a code name during the Normandy Invasion. “We’re going to do some Father’s Day things and then coming back here to ski and you’re welcomed to come along,” said Tom flanked by Mandy and their three high-schoolers Matt, Scott and Heidi. If it had been six months later, it would have made the perfect Christmas card. I thanked him but said I needed to get to town where I was sure the LSU party had already begun. “Okay,” he said, “here are the keys to your car. And I typed you some directions.” Now these people had known me a total of approximately four waking hours and they were turning over the keys to family auto to me. “They gave you a car!” my wife shrieked incredulously when I called her to inform her of my situation. “You’re not even allowed to drive on Highway 73, Highway 42 and most roads in Ascension Parish after dark. How are you going to find your way to Omaha and back?” “They gave me a map,” I replied rather sheepishly. And a rather good one, I might add, as I navigated my way to Barrett’s Barleycorn Pub and Grill-the official LSU bar of the CWS-without much trouble at all. It’s not easy to miss. The LSU flags fly outside and inside the building and some variation of a Tiger cheer or song goes off every 15 minutes. “Big Ragu (a legendary Tiger tailgater) used to make them play ‘Hold that Tiger’ every so often in the old days-now they have it programmed. Ain’t technology wonderful?” marveled my former grammar student Hilton LeBeau to his son Gunner, the first people I had met when I stepped out of my loaner in the parking lot. I still remember the first words they spoke when they saw me-“Who gave you a car?” We moved to another Omaha watering hole-McFly’s-where you can play Keno-a numbers game that looks like you can’t lose and that you really can’t win-and then on to the

corporate circus of tents out by the ballpark. Robert King-still another voice from the past-secured some VIP passes to the Tito Vodka area where we watched State dismantle North Carolina (just as the Wolfette had predicted) while quaffing free beer and Moscow Mules. Needless to say, we were in high spirits by game time and the vast majority of the 26,000 fans pulling for LSU were ready to explode. I had met Jack’s friend Larry who had hooked me up with tickets 20 rows behind the Tigers’ third base dugout and all was right with the world. Then, the unthinkable happened. We lost. Not only did we lose, we lost to the smallest of the small ballers UCLA. Bunt, bunt and bunt again. Somewhere Earl Weaver was spinning in his grave. As we headed back to Barrett’s, wallowing in self-pity and disbelief, another disturbing thought occurred to me. Nine sobering innings had not been enough to sober me up sufficiently to drive a strange car 20-something miles down a strange route back to my benevolent hosts’ abode. Even if Tom was the popular Public Defender of Sarpy County and Mandy a successful plaintiff attorney, I doubted that those two, Perry Mason and the entire case of L.A. Law could get me off if I got behind that wheel. I had texted Tom in the seventh inning but my phone had gone deader than LSU’s bats about that time so I had no idea if he’d received my s.o.s. But the cavalry-consisting of Tom and his neighbor-had already arrived to save the day and were waiting for us when we got back to Barrett’s. “Tommy, I’m really sorry to inconvenience you…” I began. “It’s okay,” he said cheerfully. “Nick had told us some stories about you so we were sort of expecting to be on call.” My reputation had preceded me to Omaha. Monday, June 17 If the Strigenz clan is the Great American Midwestern Family-I like to think of them as “Leave It to Beaver” on jet skis-then the Lesoles are Omaha’s Great Italian Family. The owners of the best Italian restaurant in the citynamed “Lesole Mio” of course-are huge Nebraska fans and Husker coach Bo Pelini is a frequent customer. But when 27

LSU comes to the CWS, the Big Red colors give way to Purple and Gold. Which is why we found ourselves on a party-oops-a pontoon out on Hansen Lake at a Monday afternoon soiree hosted by Don and Dino Lesole and family for Tiger supporters. The mood was surprisingly upbeat at the gathering with the popular sentiment being we’d still come back through the losers’ bracket and win the whole thing. “The team would rather play than practice any way,” philosophized Judge Wall through a large link of Italian sausage he could have used for a gavel. Of course, it’s hard not be in a good mood when you’re out on a lake on a Monday afternoon stuffed with Italian goodies, beer and red wine. I guess the question that begged to be asked was, “Besides the obvious economic impact-why all the love for LSU?” Don answered that over the years, LSU’s numerous trips to the CWS had created friendships that had endured even when the Tigers hit a dry spell. He also pointed out a common ground that I should have realized earlier-a fierce passion for one’s college team-especially football. Don and Dino had even attended a night game in Tiger Stadium as guests of New Orleans restaurant owner Mike Serio who of course was on the cruise. “We went out until 3 a.m. on Bourbon Street and then Mike said he’d pick us up at 6:30 for the game which started at eight that night. I figured that would give me time to recover until I realized he meant 6:30 the next morning,” he laughed. Another common thread was the mutual dislike for Texas. “We loved it in ’09 when LSU beat Texas for the title,” said Dino. “We’d had some trouble with some of their fans in Austin after a Big 12 football game when they jumped me and my friends. The cops let the Longhorns go but we’ll get ‘em back one day.” Then he said something in Italian that one of the cousins translated for me-“Revenge is a dish best serve cold.” When asked about the vacant lot on the side of the camp, Don explained that his nephew’s July 4th fireworks display had blown up a cabin that was there. “It took us a year to get the felony charges reduced to a misdemeanor and a 200 dollar fine, but we did it,” smiled

Don. There were more stories of the old Nebraska-Oklahoma rivalries during the Tom Osborne-Barry Switzer years and too soon it was time to go. I was assigned to ride back with Dino but he had one important duty left to do. “I have to kiss my mother before we go,” he said. I started to ask him if there was anyone’s ring I needed to kiss. Tuesday, June 18 Robert tried in vain to get us back in the Tito’s tent before the game with UNC but was informed that Yahoo had bought that spot for the day. “Damn technology,” said Hilton who had bragged on Barrett’s set-up the day before. Instead we headed for a tailgating party hosted by Serio and John Marie which even had former LSU lineman Robert Dugas helping out with the cooking. Some N.C. State fans stopped by to wish us good luck and one was fairly adamant. “It’s time to send those (expletives deleted) home!” he implored. I get the feeling they really don’t like one another. I met Larry, got my great seats again and…

The Ascension Sun Devils' 9-and-under AAA ... You Guys Rock

We lost. LSU-LSU-Two and through and barbecue. Just like that my fantasy land adventure of beaches, beer and baseball was over. Beaten, busted, disgusted we did what every Tiger fan does when he’s down on his luck. We headed for the casinos across the river. I started to plop down at a blackjack table at the Horseshoe when I noticed a tunnel leading outside. “Where’s that go?” I asked the dealer. “To the live dog racing and simulcast horse racing,” he answered. Casinos, dogs and horses all under the same roof? Maybe I’d found Nirvana after all. I got a beer and lost a trifecta with the dogs by a cold nose and a trifecta with the horses by a long neck and went back to the bar for a refill. That’s when I discovered the only glitch in the place. “I’m sorry,” said the barmaid. “You have to wait six more minutes before your next drink. Iowa casino laws dictate 20 minutes between drinks.” Twenty minutes? I’ve seen my golfing buddies Pete and Randall consume a six-pack in less time than that after a hot, summer round. I limped back to my table like a scolded dog and scolded some dogs of my

own when I missed another tri. Maybe it is time to get back to Louisiana. Wednesday-Thursday, June 19-20 The Omaha World sports columnist had a message in Wednesday’s paper for LSU fans. “Even though the flags at Barrett’s are flying at half-staff, we would invite the legions of LSU fans to adopt a team and spend the rest of the week here. The drinks, and aspirin, are on us.” I spent the day packing and getting reacquainted with the teenagers as they went in and out to their various activities. Matt, a senior at prestigious Creighton Prep, told me he played the euphonium for which I’ve tried to think of a euphemism without much luck. Heidi, a freshman, had a full scholarship offer from the Prep school, and decided to go to the local public school where she will lead cheers and play soccer. Made my old public school heart beat a little prouder. In the middle was Scott who plays guitar and ukulele. He showed me a few chords on the uke and in a little while, I could play a passable version of

“Blue Hawaii”. “Play that one out on your beach and you’ll get all the girls you want,” I told him. “You sure about that?” he asked. “It always worked for Elvis,” I answered. I didn’t hit any trifectas at the track but I’ve got one for you that can’t lose. When you’re travelling through the Midwest in the next couple of decades and you run into the grown-up version of this threesome, I’ll bet there’s a doctor or lawyer and even senator in front of their respective names. That’s as close to a sure thing as I will ever give you. We went out for Omaha steaks Wednesday night and Tom took me to the airport early Thursday morning to go back to reality. If you’ve never been to the CWS, do yourself a favor. Go to Omaha. I’ve been to a Notre Dame football game, the Kentucky Derby, the first Jambalaya Festival and the last Dutchtown Eagle graduation and the Omaha experience ranks right up there with all of them. Go to Omaha-and try and win some games.

The Ascension Sun Devils' 9-and-under AAA team placed third in the USSSA World Series in Dallas, Texas, over the July 4th weekend. The Devils won four games and reached the finals of the winners' bracket before losing 5-4 to the eventual champion Top Dawgs of Texas. Despite being seeded 10th in the 15 team tournament, the Devils used a determined team effort to overcome several teams with a decided talent advantage. Pictured from left are: Dylan Brown, Austin "Boogie" Villenurve, Brandt Zeller, Cade Pizzalato, Gabe Hitzman, Kyle Hertel, Will Delaune, Will Dotter, Dagan Villenurve, and Presley Sheets. The head coach was Jerry Hitzman and the assistants were Brian Villenurve and Brad Sheets. 28

Pictured : Jenny Heroman (EATEL) and Board Members James LeBlanc, Dawn Ewen, Donna Villar, Volunteer Ascension Director Sherry Denig, Amy Colby, Caroline Conerly, Jessica Lambert, President Josh Dencausse, Donna Whittington, Chad Bates, Gwen Price, Mike Dixon, Cathy Waggenspack Landry and President Elect Charlotte Guedry.

EATEL’s “Making Change” program, which began three years ago, has been very successful – more than doubling its first-year contribution. EATEL customers who have enrolled in the program automatically contribute each month by “rounding up” their bill to the next whole dollar amount. From July 2012 to July 2013, the program raised $1815.74 for Volunteer Ascension thanks entirely to the participation of generous EATEL customers. “This is a unique opportunity for EATEL to partner with our generous customers to make an impact for local schools,” said Ashley Phillips, EATEL Chief Operating Officer. “By simply rounding up their EATEL bill each

month, our customers can prove that together, hundreds of people can truly make a difference.” Monthly contributions can be as small as one penny, but never more than 99 cents. The “Making Change” money donated to Volunteer Ascension will help with several important community projects including the School Tools and School Uniforms programs. To participate in the program, EATEL customers can enroll by calling an EATEL customer service representative at 225.621.4300 or by visiting “We understand that not everyone is able to make a large donation, so with the ‘Making Change’ Program, we’ve been able to suggest an affordable (and EASY) option that won’t break the bank!” said Sherry Denig, Volunteer Ascension Executive Director. “We are so grateful to EATEL for providing such a simple way for customers to help those who are in need in Ascension Parish.”

Remeber the Ones that Love You the Most

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Sam’s Club Grant Awarded to St. Elizabeth Hospital’s Asthma Education Program
The Siegen Lane Sam’s Club awarded a $1,000 community grant to St. Elizabeth Hospital for its Asthma Education Program. Ronnie Zacharias presented the grant check to representatives of the hospital on July 10, 2013. According to Kevin Buckels, AE-C, Certified Asthma Educator and Coordinator for the hospital’s Asthma Education Program, the grant money will be used to fund diagnostic equipment and supplies for use especially in the hospital’s outreach to Ascension Parish schools. Asthma is a condition which frequently goes undiagnosed. Untreated, the condition can lead to further complications later in life. “This is why testing for Asthma at a young age is so important, and why the Sam’s Club’s grant is significant,” said Buckels. “We are very grateful to Sam’s for helping with this program and the people of our community.”



Monday Monday

Useless Random Facts
with Kellie

Tuesday & Wednesday
DJ MUSIC / KARAOKE Tues. $5 Double Wells Weds. Special $4 Vegas Bombs

Almost all heavy ele ments (ever y thing but Hydro gen, Helium, and a bit of Lithium) comes from stars that have gone super nova. You are made of stars.

Pepsi Cola was orig i nally known as “Brad’s Drink”

8/1 8/8

$4 Jager Shots









The word “trivia” comes from the latin tri-vium, mean ing the inter sec tion of three roads. In the Mid dle Ages, local towns would post their news on bill boards nearby that were at the inter sec tion of three or more roads, so as to max i mize the num ber of trav el ers who would see it. Ran dom, obscure facts that were picked up while trav el ing then became known as “trivia.”

A group of goril las is called a shrewdness.

7/19 ... TRUE


8/2 ... AFTER

8 8/9 ... TRUE SPIN


The sound you hear before water starts to boil is actu ally the first water vapor bub bles form ing at the bot tom and implod ing as they reach colder water just above. The sound you hear is the shock wave that is cre ated from the cav i ta tion that occurs.




The cells that make up the antlers of a moose are the fastest growing animal cells in nature.

Every Sunday
E V E R Y D AY AT H A P P Y H O U R , T R Y Y O U R L U C K AT R O L L - A - D AY !

A hippo can run faster than a man can.

Ever y year, Mexico City sinks about 10 inches.

A rainbow can only occur when the sun is 40 degrees or less above the horizon

Visit our

“ L I K E ” U S O N FA C E B O O K

It takes one fifteen-to-twenty-year-old tree to produce seven hundred paper grocer y bags.

1711 S. BURNSIDE • GONZALES • 644-8901

Impotence is legal grounds for divorce in 24 American states.

This month with

Spotlight on the 2013 World Champ:
A monthly News Report from the Jambalaya Festival Association
This month I had the privilege to visit with our newly crowned World Champ and his helper and wife Kellie to get the inside scoop on how being the World Champion has impacted his life. Scott Duplechein is no newbie to competing in the coveted World Champion Jambalaya Cook-off. He competed 5 years as helper to Jeff Parent, who took home the Golden Paddle and World Champion title in 2007. It was then that Scott got “bit by the bug” so to speak. He spent the year with Jeff traveling and cooking as Champion Helper and little did he know just 6 short years down the road he would be the World Champion himself. After having cooked with Jeff for many years and defending their World Title in 2008 Scott’s wife, Kellie, told Scott

she wanted to help him win the Championship. He was surprised yet grateful for her willingness to go through all of the heat to help him win. Scott and Kellie won the Swamp Pop Festival Cook-off in 2009. That taste of victory was sweet and only made them want the “big” one even more! Scott and Kellie are the second husband and wife pair to win the Jambalaya World Championship following behind Mike and Tootsie Gonzales in 2006. Scott and Kellie’s reaction to hearing their winning ticket number called was one of raw emotion and pure adrenalin. After looking at his final pot of 32

rice Scott was very confident and hopeful going into the final round of judging. As the winning number was being called Scott said his heart rate rose with each number and time began to slow down as if the world was in slow motion. Scott screamed with excitement and Kellie burst into tears upon realizing they had just won THE big one. I asked Scott what his first few months as Champion have been like and he told me, “I have had hundreds of texts, emails, phone calls, and handshakes from people throughout the parish and I am still amazed how many people

as queen and something that Scott learned long ago. Visiting with Scott’s beautiful family in their home it is clear – Jambalaya is a huge part of their life. Scotts wall of fame which once housed Jambalaya Festival posters past and present

A few upcoming events you can expect to be served this World Champion’s Jambalaya would be at the COEA Dancing for a Cause, and for the Commodities Food Drive both at Lamar Dixon this month.

stop and congratulate us at Wal-Mart or even at the ball park!” Scott’s daughter told him “Its official, you’re famous!” after a complete stranger approached Scott in the grocery store to congratulate him. This is a perfect example of how wonderful and close-nit our Parish is and how the Jambalaya Festival and Association has impacted this community. It was with the spirit and charism of the JFA that Scott felt he had found an outlet to act on his passion for volunteerism. Scott was able to get a taste for cooking and serving others through much of his year on Jeff Parent’s Champion Team. It was with this opportunity that Scott truly saw how much the JFA actively serves the local community all year long and why he has remained an active member of the association.

After speaking with Kellie, Scott’s lovely wife and helper, I learned a little more about how the Jambalaya Festival truly has changed Scott’s life. Before having been on the 2007 World Champion Team Scott was quiet and soft spoken – but that is not so much the case today.

As a World Champion you have to be able to go out in to your local and state community and speak to people and to serve as a voice for this festival. It is something I learned in my year

(only just relocated to a different part of the home) now houses his beautiful Golden Paddle with his name freshly engraved alongside all 45 other World Champions, his winning tickets, and World Champion plaque. Seeing this touched my heart because I know that this festival, community, and everything it stands for has become a huge part of his life and the life of his family as it has to mine. I was lucky enough to be standing fairly close by when Scott and Kellie’s winning number was called and struggled to catch the first few pictures of their reaction on my camera because of my own tears. I have never been so excited for someone especially who is so deserving of everything that comes with being the World Champion.

Scott jokingly told me, “I hope I didn’t go on too long, but I can talk about Jambalaya all night!” I second that statement and will end my article with those exact words from the Champ himself! Congratulations again Scott! Jambalaya love always, Meredith Conger

JFA in the Community
• Cooking for the Quad Area Good Giveaway, July 10 • Cooking for Dancing For a Cause benefitting the Arc of East Ascension COEA, July 13 • Swamp Pop Festival Cook-off benefitting the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation, July 19-20


Thoughts from Bully
I printed this article last month and sentences in the last paragraph was compromised by cyber space. I am re-running it with the punch line at the end. If you read the article last month and wondered how the story ended just read the last paragraph. If you didn’t read it get your butt to reading because it is a pretty funny story.

JOIN US and the Baton Rouge Affiliate of Susan G. Komen Baton Rouge at Pelican Point Golf Club for Ascension Parish’s signature breast cancer event! July 25th.
Sponsorship opportunities available. Contact Komen Baton Rouge at 225-615-8740 or


Who Wears the Pants in Your Family?
To quote Forrest Gump, “I’ve worn lots of shoes.” In my life I’ve worn lots of pants. I’ve worn paint pants, ripped pants and striped pants. White pants, black pants, I’ve even wore polka-dot pants. Knickers and slickers are lots of fun. I have some pants that hold my gun. These pants have varied through the years in waist size. Thin sized, medium sized and now they are X-tra large sized. They’ve been saggy, baggy and Raggedy Ann like to. However they have never been dangling off my back-side like the pants-on-the-ground do. I’ve had the pants scared off of me and have been caught with my pants. Not literally but an unprepared moment in time. I’ve had to put on my big boy pants. I’ve been asked to take my pants off. I’ve panted

because my pants are too hot. I’ve shivered because my pants weren’t hot enough. I may have had a woman or two tell me, “you look Hot in those pants”, however I’m old and can’t remember. That would be nice to remember. Once, when I went streaking, I definantly had to take my pants off. I waited till dark so no one would be hollering, “put them back on!” I once was married to a sweet lady who happened to work in Field Collections for the IRS. Guess who wore the pants then? I’ve had girl friends who couldn’t keep their pants on. Too bad I wasn’t around when they took them off. The origin of the worn pant, mid 19th century, was an abbreviation for pantaloons. Thank God they are not pantaloons these days. I don’t think I would wear a pantaloon. There was one time I learned the lesson of my life. I was dating a lady that like to keep things in order and thought it was her duty to take care of me. She’d wash and fold my cloths. She’d lay out what she thought I should wear. She’d buy me clothes that I had to wear. I never knew how I’d look from day-to-day. One afternoon, after showering, my cloths were layed out next to hers on the bed. I proceeded to get dressed. That’s when it

happened. She entered the room and started screaming at me like crazy. I’m befuddled. With a glare in her eye she said, “I will kill you if you snap those pants!” “What?” What was she thinking? Did I miss some advances that she made? Were we suppose to have some fun time before I got dressed? She repeated, “If you snap those pants you are a dead man!” With her hands on her hips and steam flowing from her ears she screamed, “Those are my pants and you fit in them. Take them off.” At the time I thought I’d take the opportunity to make light of the situation and be a smart ass. “Hey Baby, Do these pants make my butt look big?” Oh Boy, that was the wrong

thing to say. Have you ever seen the top draw from the dresser get removed in a split second and whop you up side the head. I have. Lesson learned. Stay away from the fat jokes while wearing your girl friends pants or you’ll be wearing the curtain rod around your neck. I’ve avoided this story for years because I was affraid she might follow through with some of the threats. However, she lives in another parish and has a new boy friend. Ironically, when we broke up she left some cloths behind, including those jeans. They’re my favorite pair to wear these days. However, they are little roomey in the hips.

I ran into a television celebrity while enjoying the Jambalaya Festival. It’s ‘Shorty’ of Swamp Pawn. He’s pictured here on the left. I can tell you the lips tattoo on his neck is real and I see how he got his nickname.


Millie Goes Fishing with Nana & Uncle Bully


Cooking Gourmet at Home with SNO’S SEAFOOD & STEAKS

Dill Shrimp Crostinis
Prep Time: 20 minutes Servings: 15 servings

Ingredients: • 1 pound fresh boiled gulf shrimp (90/110 count) • 1 medium red onion (diced) • ½ cup dill weed (finely chopped) • 2 cups mayonnaise • 1 cup sour cream • 4 ounces cream cheese (softened) • 3 loaves French bread (10-12 inches) • ¼ cup Olive oil • Juice of 1 lemon • Salt and Pepper to taste Method:

Executive Chef Ben Jarreau &  Sous Chef Brandon Kling

Heat your oven to 400 degrees. Thinly slice French bread then lay on baking pan. Drizzle the olive oil over the sliced bread, then bake for 5 minutes or until bread is golden brown. Let the bread cool for 10 minutes. In a mixing bowl combine the shrimp, diced onion, chopped dill, mayonnaise, sour cream, and cream cheese then mix well. Season the mixture with salt and pepper. Squeeze in the lemon juice and mix well. Allow to sit in the refrigerator for 5 minutes before serving. When you are ready, generously spread the mixture on the toasted crostinis and SERVE!! 37

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Chee Weez, Big Luther, Chris LeBlanc, Eddie Smith Band, T.K. Hulin and Blue Eyed Soul Revue rocked the house with many more with a touch of Hai Karate. Enjoy the photo spread of the best music and musicians in the state. Roland Doucet
Guaranty Broadcasting

This years Jambalaya Festival carried a wide variety of entertainment that showcased Swamp Pop and Swamp Rock. There were so many bands I couldn’t get to all of them. GG Shinn, Boogie King All Stars, NaNaSha, Van & Grace, Kenny Cornett and Kenny Fife.

100.7 FM WTGE



JOIN US and the Baton Rouge Affiliate of Susan G. Komen Baton Rouge at Pelican Point Golf Club for Ascension Parish’s signature breast cancer event!

Registration & Survivor Breakfast ......................... 7:00 a.m. Shotgun Start .................................. 8:30 a.m. Lunch & Awards .............................. 1:00 p.m.

Enjoy breakfast and celebrate survivorship with area breast cancer survivors

Sponsorship opportunities available. Contact Komen Baton Rouge at 225-615-8740 or

Jeremy Langlois, Executive Chef

Houmas House Plantation & Gardens Invites You to Experience

Latil’s Landing

Daily Tours:
Monday, Tuesday 9AM - 5 PM Wednesday-Sunday 9AM -7 PM

Cafe' Burnside:
11 AM- 2 PM daily

Latil's Landing:
Wednesday through Saturday 6 PM- 9 PM, Sunday Brunch 11 AM - 3 PM; Reservations Required

RIVER ROAD, BURNSIDE, LA • 225.473.9380 • 42

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