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incident occurs later on where your feelings or emotions have had to suffer deeply then you must check this list of symptoms. If one or more of those symptoms are presently in your life, then that incident may have been forgotten but not resolved. Behind the scenes it still is influencing your behavior, your attitude, your capacity to relate to people and your efficiency at your job or daily activities. It is like a fire fed continuously with gasoline. It is difficult to be ignited. That unsolved incident has created a pattern in your behavior. Eventually it has become a habit. It can not be overcome through regular methods such as: education, the power of will, avoiding certain circumstances etc. A special approach to this situation is needed. Symptoms of Emotionally Wounded People: • People pleasing • Addiction to approval • Performance • Rescuing • Chronic problem solving • Addiction to attention • Chronic problem to gain attention • Manipulation • Lust for control • Alcohol abuse • Eating disorder • Kleptomania • Gambling addiction • Perfectionism • Chemical abuse • Sexual addiction • Child abuse • Shopping addiction • Workaholic Under stress reactions: • Rage • Uncontrollable fear
Depression • Phobias • Distrust • Defensiveness • Inability to receive criticism • Blaming • Inability to be intimate • Relational isolation • High levels of anxiety • Panic attacks • Thoughts of suicide • Thoughts of violence • Desire to run away • Abusive behavior •
Real Sources of Healing The teaching from the Bible about God must be combined with an atmosphere
and a climate where the experienced character of the parents and significant adults is consistent with the described character of God in the Bible. If there has been contradiction between the two, there will be emotional ruin , damaged love receptors, and spiritual dilemmas. Spiritual Dilemmas can not be fixed with doctrinal teaching only. They are the direct consequences of unhealthy interpersonal relationships. Healing of Memory is the only treatment that is effective. Here are some of spiritual dilemmas emotionally hurt people may face: 1. The inability to feel forgiven 2. The inability to trust or surrender to God 3. Intellectual questions and theological doubts Lets talk about each one a little bit: 1 The Inability to Feel Forgiven To feel forgiven means an inner knowledge and confidence that we are forgiven children of God… This is a direct result of faith since Jesus death did took place 2000 years ago and you will applied today for your present sin. Also is His death in behalf of your guilt. All of this becomes efficient when the need for forgiveness is accompanied by faith in the heart of transgressor. However to have faith or trust in someone or something is the most difficult thing for
emotional victims. Their ability to trust has been drastically diminished. But keep in mind you are trusting God for something that has happened in the past which can positively affect your future, but not negatively. So take the chance. Another difficulty presents itself. Low self esteem which many times is present in the experience of emotional victims. They think they don’t deserve something, anything; consequently they must do something to receive forgiveness. It could not be their only by believing. The victims of abusive behavior (verbal or physical) have also a tendency to blame themselves for everything is happening with such vigor that they think for them there is no chance at all to be forgiven. What they have done is too bad to be forgiven (they have as a proof of this, when previously in their lives, they have been severely punished for even little mistakes they have made.) On the other hand, due to their experience their love receptors are damaged and their ability to feel loved and accepted is minimal. They understand mentally God’s love and forgiveness but have a hard time accepting it and experiencing it. They experience the same thing in regarding other people. As a direct consequence of not feeling forgiven they live under the pressure of a continued guiltiness which creates a state of mind described as irascibility and irritability. Even though they manifest that irritability in present circumstances, the real reason has nothing to do with the present situation but with their past. The inability to feel forgiven. It is very difficult to live, work, associate with such a person. And that accentuates and makes their behavior worse since they feel rejected. They are in a vicious cycle. The only way out is to take enough time in prayer for forgiveness before God to allow time for the Holy Spirit to deal with their problem. In my experience, sometimes it takes an entire night in agonizing prayer in order to overcome this condition. But it is worth it. Next day they are so different that people hardly recognize them. Mary Magdalene lesson: We have much to forgive but also have much for which we need to be forgiven. 2 The inability to trust or surrender to God God created us to be afraid and not trust everything or everyone we are afraid of or we don’t know. So as long as you are afraid of God you will not be able to develop a trustful relationship. You need to work on knowing God better than you did know Him until now. Take the chance and get involved into a program that will help you to build your communion with God. God is the Father you always desired. He is the Friend you always dreamed about. He is the Spouse you always seek. He is the trustful person you never found. He loves you and has been waiting for you. Take a moment and understand yourself:
Often the inability to trust and surrender to God is only a result of your failure to recognize your own faults. Rarely may you hear those people apologizing. And even though you may apologize you only do it generally. And almost with no exception even before God you say something like: “if I did something wrong…” Or before God you say: “God please forgive me for I may have done something wrong” The major problem is that you are not accepting your mistake. You feel you are too perfect to need leadership. You always know what must be done. You try to impose your opinion on others and are controlling. You only need Jesus once in a while. You question others and question God as well. Bringing new doctrinal information is not helpful for to you. You need to resolve the root of your problem. Your emotional problem is due to your past. You may not be able to point to a specific incident but you have been exposed to a very controlling parent, sibling, friend or teacher. Or you were forced to live with a step parent whom you have never been able to know well enough to trust. You may have trouble trusting in God because you have experienced in your life a relationship with an unpredictable, undependable, always absent or apathetic parents / significant adults / spouse (later on). Now if you are in this situation you need to check up which may be the root of your problem and resolve it through the mechanism listed below. This is your responsibility toward yourself and your loved ones. You need to separate yourself from the past; break the vicious cycle. Start the program of healing your memory. Accept your part of fault in your behavior. In the beginning it was their fault but you have chosen to continue and behave badly against innocent people who love you. They don’t deserve this treatment. Then assume the risk and build a relationship with God. As soon as that is made real, your ability to trust in God will increase and your relationship with others will be also improved. Saul the king and Gideon; same problem, different conclusion. 3. Intellectual questions and theological doubts Our faith is greatly affected by our feelings. Illnesses – even something as simple as the common cold, affect our faith, our prayer life, our patience, and how we think and feel about God ourselves and others. Negative feelings accentuate the doubts and question we may have about God. Remember that religious and theological doubts which are emotionally rooted cannot be solved by theological arguments. Not all theological questions and doubts are a sign of disbelief, unbelief or rebellion. In many instances, they are symptoms of the need for a deep, inner healing. Only after this takes place such people are able to reshape their faulty doctrines. So how does an emotionally wounded person receive healing?
Follow these steps:
Start the process of healing your memory by 1. Totally forgiving those who hurt you in the past, each and every day! Click here for Forgiveness Prayer 2. Accepting your part of the fault. Your poor behaviors with others. Ask God to forgive you. Accept God’s forgiveness to you! 3. Choose to leave the past behind. Do not rehearse it in your mind. If you remember hurtful events, choose to separate yourself from your past. Do not repeat hurtful events to others. See If you have Totally Forgiven Article 4. Build a relationship with God by prayer and reading His Word daily. 5. Acknowledge that God loves you. You have amazing worth to Him! He wants you to live a life of happiness and free of bitterness, resentment, and anger over your past hurts or injustices. 6. Trust God with all your heart and accept His healing day by day by exercising your faith. Simply choose to believe His Word. 7. Thank God every day for His healing in your life!
Click here for Prayer for Emotional Healing
For more articles on this subject go to: http://relevantlifesolutions.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=75&Itemid=85 For more helpful articles, links and resources go to: http://relevantlifesolutions.org
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