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Christina Sponias Chatzidimou

All rights reserved by the author. It is expressly
forbidden to copy and/or distribute this ebook or any portion
thereof by any means, whether digital or conventional,
without written consent from the author

If you would like to offer this ebook as a gift to someone

in need of guidance, please refer them to my website at or drop me a line and
I’ll be more than happy to assist that person.

Christina Sponias Chatzimidou, Author


I'd like to dedicate this inspirational ebook to my

adored friend, Arnold Balcarce, who was lost through an
act of suicide when he was just 28 years old. His example
guided me through the dangers of the unknown truths I
discovered through the interpretation of my dreams, and
allowed me to avoid his fatal mistakes.

Though he was also searching for knowledge and

truth, he failed. However, his failure was very important
for me, otherwise I wouldn't have encountered success on
my journey.

C h r i s t i n a S p o n i a s Chatzidimou


Christina Sponias Chatzidimou

Knowledge and ignorance everywhere, without
distinction… if you think this place is a living hell, you’re
absolutely right; if you don’t, then you’re naïve. In any event,
with the help of my lesson about happiness within a living
hell, you can smarten up, starting right now!

Do you think you can find happiness in a living hell?

I doubt it! Hell is hell! You need to change it if you want

to be happy. But, who can correct a living hell, where
everything is awful and so completely wrong? Only a hero…

Would you like to be a hero? Yes? You’re silly!! No? I

thought not! But now you’re being cowardly, aren’t you?

Nothing is ever really perfect. There is no magical

solution for any of your problems. You need to suffer! Do I
sound too simplistic? Then be simplistic like me, but don’t
lose your hopes. Keep them in a safe place, because you’ll
need them regularly during life’s journey.

If you have no hopes, you’d better acquire some: it’s

easy and it’s free. You can, for example, hope to become
rich. Don’t just hope to be or to have something that doesn’t
exist however, because it sounds ‘crazy’. You must hope to
see the impossible happen to you, even if it does exist.

If someone considers you a bit ‘crazy’, don’t pay them

any mind. You can consider them person crazy as well.
Opinions are only opinions…

If you don’t have any courage left and only want to die,
you are being exactly like billions of people in this world!
Nothing original… but if you commit suicide, you are going to
hurt all of the people who care for you, and you’ll lose the
opportunity to be happy in hell, after making it look like

Nothing is really easy, though… after all, hell is hell!

Do you want to try to be a hero?

No? I’m sorry, but you have to. To be and to remain alive
today is a task of epic proportions, and it requires real
heroes! Heroes can’t die without suffering themselves and
creating or leaving more problems to the problematical world
in which we live. Death… is not a solution, so forget it!

If you die now, your enemies will take advantage of the

situation and steal everything you acquired during your life.
Don’t be naïve; no one is going to suffer for you, really.
Everyone will forget you in a while… but you’ll ruin many
people’s lives if you abandon the journey in this selfish way.

Perhaps you don’t care about anything or anyone. Ok, but

you better care about yourself and change your mind. Suicide
is the worse mistake a person can make!

No, this is not poetry. This is reality!

Nothing ceases to exist on our planet; energy passes

through many transformations. How can we expect to stop
existing when we die? We don’t just cease to exist!

And who can guarantee that things’ll be better if we give

up living? Perhaps we’ll feel worse after death, instead of
feeling better because we’ll have abandoned the painful
situations of our lives.

You should fear ignorance and a worse hell if you

abandon the one where you are now. Things can always be
worse, no matter how horrible they already are! Being so,
you have to find ways to be strong and continue the battle of
life. There is no other possible solution. Forget the idea of
killing yourself! You have to live and suffer.

Don’t complain about it though; after all, you’re not the

only one who suffers, here on Earth! Think about those who
suffer for very serious reasons in our planet. Here is not a
place to be happy as we imagined when we were children. Be

I’ve lived many years wanting to die, but I understood I
couldn't do it. I studied dreams, trying very hard to learn how
to interpret them until one day, I discovered their hidden
meaning! I documented my dreams during a period of two
years, in three notebooks; though I didn't really understand
much of what they revealed.

One fine day, things began to fit together like the pieces
of a puzzle and I could see the whole image produced by my
unconscious. At first, it was great to be able to understand
my dreams and their messages… but then, the messages I
received were very disappointing! My subconscious revealed
my schizophrenia, so I now had to fight against craziness,
too! I hadn’t completely lost my human conscience, but it was
difficult to wage this battle; I had to do the impossible… so I
became a hero!

I really just wanted to die, but I understood my

responsibility. If I was to fight schizophrenia and win, even
though it seemingly impossible to succeed, I would be offered
the opportunity to save other desperate people who have no
hope to be cured of their craziness… and that’s exactly what
happened! It happened because I was a good student and a
very serious patient. I followed my subconscious directions; I
studied hard, worked hard and became a hero!

In so doing, I managed to conquer my schizophrenia,

though I knew it couldn’t completely just disappear. I
nonetheless discovered that it could be controlled…

If you are struggling with the compelling urge to take the

easy ticket out, you should follow my example because you
need to continue living to do your part. You’ve got something
to offer humanity, as well. You have something to do here, in
this place; you aren’t just here on a vacation! You are not
free to waste your life as you please. Your life doesn’t just
belong to you, but also to the society where you belong, to
the people that depend on you, to the God that created you,
hoping that you would do something to help Him put an end
to this hell in which we live, in search for happiness!

You have a moral obligation to accomplish the impossible,
to be a hero, to teach something important to humanity, just
like me. Everyone shares this obligation because the hell we
share is dangerous and we all suffer, though differently!
Some may seem not to suffer at all, but they do, of course, if
only because they are alive! If you are alive, then you have
needs to fulfill in order to feel satisfied. These needs are not
only material…

You need to be accepted by society, to love and feel

loved, to give and to receive, to trust somebody, to have
good friends, to live peacefully and to achieve your goals…
many things!

It’s not easy! Not at all… but you’ve got to be a hero! If

you refuse to do what’s necessary, you could become crazy
someday, and not be able to do anything. Once your human
conscience has been destroyed, it cannot be recovered.

If you commit suicide, then you will forever lose your

human conscience because you won’t be able to care about
anyone else. You may think that those who surround you
don’t deserve your sacrifice, but it’s not only for them; it’s for
yourself, as well! You won’t enter a paradise after a suicide!

You won’t even rest as you imagine; you’ll suffer even

more! So, don’t be foolish! Accept to live and continue your
journey in life, no matter how much you are suffering right
now. Later on, things will get better for you… if you have
courage and always respect your moral principles.

Always be human with everyone, and you’ll see

compensation in your life, because we all receive what we
give. This physical law applies universally to all things, living
or not ( for every action there is an equal reaction ).

If you want to die because of the disappointment or

desperation experienced because of someone’s actions or
indifference to your suffering, you need to understand that
human beings are not as human as they see themselves to
be. In fact, human beings possess little human conscience,

deriving most of their intuition from their wild side, void of
structured thought and human feeling. Like a lion in the wild,
it’s a monster that kills its prey. When a person loses their
human conscience, their wild side surfaces and controls their
behavior. That’s why people become crazy.

I clearly recognized this tragic reality while fighting

against schizophrenia. I won because I believed in God, in
good and the true meaning of human existence. I knew that I
was fighting against insanity, but most people do not. You
need to forgive your enemies and have pity of them, since
their ‘wild’ side has robbed them of their human side.

As I stated before, people cannot totally recuperate their

human conscience after having lost it. This is a tragic reality,
as yet ignored! We are not as human as we believe…

I became a scientist to help me solve many of the

problems I faced, after continuing Carl Jung’s research into
the ignored side of the human psychical sphere. What I
discovered discouraged me, because I saw the wild side of
our psychical sphere – what I call ‘the real demon’. That’s
what can turn a schizophrenic into a murderer.

Our selfish and proud society cannot accept this reality,

as it couldn't accept the fact that monkeys are our distant
relatives, but the scientific world will have to understand that
we are basically wild demons with a thin human conscience.

If you know the truth, things become easier. Truth allows

one to understand the reasons why well behaved individuals
suddenly become monsters. It explains why our world is a
living hell, governed by the laws of violence and hypocrisy.
Don’t lose hope, because apart from the tragedy, there is a
God to help us! The problem is that we won’t obey Him. We
don’t want to suffer…

Of course, we have to if we want to live peacefully. Why?

Because we need to suffer in order to respect our moral
principles. This is the only way we can keep our human
conscience alive forever! However, we very easily abandon

our moral principles when we want something or someone
enough. We don’t care about anything else; we only care for
our own selfish desire. That’s how we lose our human
conscience. The wild and cruel side of our psychical sphere
gets to take our place and control our behavior…

You need to have pity on your enemies and on everyone

you know because no one here is perfect. We are distanced
from perfection and psychical health - you too, of course! So,
why not learn how to beat your craziness and how to be good
so that you might help those who don’t understand. If you
want to die, it’s because you know that this place is hell. This
is the first step to real knowledge and wisdom!

You’ll see that here, nothing has the value we imagine.

You’ll understand how hopeless it is to live like common
people do, not caring about their spiritual evolution. If you
feel desperate, it is because you are right; you are not
naïvely submerged in illusions, like most people in our world.

So, what you need to do is to adopt a serious attitude

and gain the strength to help other people win against
despair and depression, as you will. Humanity needs you! You
need to open people’s eyes to show them the tragic reality;
you need to become an example for others to emulate; you
need to develop a mature vision of our world.

If we want to live happily on Earth, we need to overcome

obstacles like craziness. We need to put an end to misery. We
need to eliminate violence, immorality, hypocrisy and futility.

Your problem is not only yours. The whole world shares

the same problem. Everyone here lives, though wanting to
die at many points during their painful journey…

Since I began helping desperate people, I’ve seen the

despair that exists in each life! Most people live under
unbearable conditions, and face unbearable situations! How
can someone achieve psychical health this way?

Everything here is wrong, and everyone here is a selfish
coward! You should pity God too, because He suffers more
than anybody else, trying to cure our global craziness!

I can scientifically prove His existence to the scientific

world, but this is not enough to convince everyone that we
should only obey God’s directions. The human being wants to
do what his own selfish conscience tells him to do!

First of all, most people in our world are atheistic or only

pretend to believe in God.


Our wild side is very powerful and prevents us from liking

goodness. It makes us prefer to be completely free of the
obligation to respect a wiser spirit that can illuminate us with
wisdom. We prefer to make mistakes, following our own
conscience, than to obey God and save our spirit.

Most people hate to talk about God and the spiritual life,
thinking this is only stupidity. Most people even feel a kind of
pleasure in declaring that they believe in the material world
which can be seen and touched. They consider those who
believe in the existence of God and of a human spirit as naïve
souls who believe in fairy tales.

However, if we want to be objective and see the truth,

independently from our personal opinion, we need to admit
that there are unexplained phenomena in our world that can
only be explained through the admittance of God’s existence.

A group of scientists clearly demonstrated this reality

through the results of their research. One of the questions
raised is: ‘How can we explain the existence of so many
different organisms on Earth, if we consider our planet’s age?’
The necessary combinations that allow for the development
of the first live cell could not have been tried by chance on
our planet; otherwise the live cell would not have appeared
yet. Our planet is too young! All of the possible combinations
would not yet have been tested.

Another intriguing point is the ability of the organism,
from the first days of life and without having learned how to
do so by observing the same reaction in other organisms of
the same species, to defend itself against its enemies. This
indicates that the defensive reaction is inherited and ready to
function in the organism’s knowledge base. The organism is
already programmed to react in a certain way.

So, we come to the following question: ‘Who programs

everything?’ We need a superior brain to organize and
prepare the function of everything. It’s naïve, in my view, to
try to explain everything through the natural combination of
factors that occurred only by chance!

So, you can see how things really are, and how we
imagine them to be, according to the way we learn to
consider them in our ignorant world.

If you recognize how horrible the reality is where we are,

you are starting to understand why this world needs you! At
least you can see how impossible it is for us to live happily in
a world like this! At least you can try to do something to help
desperate people like yourself find not only a way to survive,
but a way to overcome despair forever on Earth!

We need you in order to live peacefully! We need you to

help save the poor and the weak that have no rights in our
world. We need your example, your thoughts, and your
intervention! So, please, don’t abandon this world only
because it is a living hell! We need you that see this tragedy,
so that we may influence this tragic reality and transform this
place into one where human beings can live in peace! We
need you that are temporarily unhappy in your own
environment, alienated and indifferent to what is
happening to the rest of the world!

Please find, in the necessity to help others that are

weaker than you, a reason to live! Please discover your own
power and your intelligence, because you are not foolishly
involved in illusions like most in this apathetic society!

As a matter of fact, the truth is that a depressed person
is nearer psychical health than an apathetic person, even
though this is not the opinion of the majority. In our ignorant
and selfish world people believe they should only care for
their own lives without caring about how other people live.
This is considered a healthy attitude. But is it really? Do you
honestly believe that a person who turns a blind eye to the
suffering masses in our world, caring only about his own
family and friends, possesses psychical health?

This is craziness! Your health is in much better shape

then theirs! At least you don’t agree with all the horrors that
exist in our world! At least you exist, and can protest against
indifference to other people’s suffering!

We need you! Please… live! Live to show the world what

you think of it! Live your life and try to change it, even
though it may seem impossible…

I began my career as a psychologist, achieving what was

impossible to be achieved. I overcame the demons of
schizophrenia! But that was not enough… that’s why I
continued… I needed to achieve other impossible things! This
was but the first. In spite of the many humiliations I had to
swallow, I found the courage to face them by having pity on
my ignorant enemies!

Out of consideration for those I’ve helped, I cannot

reveal the intimate details of their cases, but there is one that
I’d like to mention. There was a dentist who committed
suicide when her baby was only 4 months old… I knew her
brother very well, because I had helped him face his divorce.
His sister seemed to be very strong and balanced. She
provided him with support, advice and help. Her suicide was a
very big shock to those who knew her!

I visited her husband twice per week for about 18 months

after her death. I interpreted his dreams, providing him with
insight into the reasons his wife died. In the end, he better
understood; accepting them and the tragedy. Though he
loved her, the problems that were frightening her could have

easily been solved, but she unfortunately lost hope. She
abandoned everyone and everything…

Don’t be like her! Don’t lose hope! Don’t just assume and
accept that things will be so awful forever - that there can be
no solution to your problems. Don’t hide from the people who
love you, especially if you are seriously thinking about
committing suicide. Tell them how you feel; request help -
they have a moral obligation to provide it for you! Don’t allow
craziness to ruin your mind and push you to suicide!

This is a crazy world where almost everyone is selfish and

indifferent to the feelings of others, but there are exceptions!
You’ll find help if you’ll look for it!

Courage! You have a lot to learn and a lot to do!

To those who truly believe, the pages of this ebook offer peace, comfort and relief
from suffering, no matter how great. It was originally conceived and penned to
help a group of friends… one suffering from long term psychosis, a visually
challenged individual, a Parkinson’s sufferer and some who’d lost loved ones.

My intent was to help those who believe in the existence of God and His efforts to
save us from the consequences of our mistakes; those who’ve understood that
we can draw peace and wisdom from our pain, transforming our beastly nature
into what we’ve come to know as human nature.

These poems offer great social value. As a soothing balm on an open wound,
they are like medicine to the injured soul. In the first poem, entitled: “The Light
of Truth,” a visually challenged individual demonstrates the darkness of ignorance
and the illumination of wisdom. “The Reply,” reveals God’s response to sinners
who complain of their suffering, while the third and final instalment of this poetic
trilogy, “The Resurrection,” features a soul who explains the true meanings of life
and death.

Find peace, comfort, support, courage and wisdom in the pages of this
ebook for only 7.50 euros.