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I first wanted to get into the rave scene when i was only 12 years old. we learned about “club drugs” in health class. one of the scenes in the video we watched was of a rave. they showed this guy “rolling” dancing like crazy having the time of his life. this is when i knew ecstasy was the drug for me. Only being 12 years old i had no idea where raves were taking place or how to find them. and for most raves you needed to be 18. but i knew what electronic music was. i called it techno at the time. i would go home and try and find electronic dance music online. not knowing what it was actually called i would search google; DJ, or techno. trying to get into the scene. i was only able to find old school happy hardcore songs. the only DJ i was able to come across was Tiesto. Tiesto happened to be the number 1 DJ in the world. i downloaded some of his songs. but honestly at the time i wasn’t really digging them. but i listened to them anyway hoping they would grow on me, because i wanted to get into the scene. they never did. so i continued listening to mainstream radio. but techno was always in the back of my mind. A few years later still trying to get into the scene. i would youtube “DJ” still trying to find names of DJs and where they would be playing. i came across a youtube mix called DJ ravines happy hardcore mixes. This was a start. i now know of 2 DJ’s and a genre called happy hardcore. happy hardcore is a very fast paced form of dance music. when you think of techno you’re probably thinking of happy hardcore. so i would listen to this guys mixes. they were sweet. i actually liked techno now. so we’re making progress. unfortunately this guy was from australia. so i never saw him. after watching DJ ravines mixes on youtube i wanted to start mixing. i looked into buying turntables knowing absolutely nothing about them, except the ones i was looking at were around $1,000. being 14 at the time, these were out of the question. throughout highschool i still wanted to get into the scene. i knew all about the scene, the whole “PLUR” peace, love, unity, respect thing. the coming together of outsiders and how everyone was accepted. eveyone just wanted to dance and enjoy the music. nothing but positive vibes. this was right up my alley as i was an outsider in highschool. i was the kid everyone knew but no one really talked to. i think i had maybe 6 or 7 actual friends in highschool. one of them being my best friend Drake. he was the one that introduced me to all of my other 6 or 7 friends. high school was rough for me. having little friends and going though a lot psychologically i was very withdrawn and kept to myself. i never really got bullied, but in class kids would throw pencils and erasers at me. it didnt really bother me but whatever just get me out of this class. this was most of my highschool career. Finally senior year 2011, my 6 or 7 friends went to a music festival called bonaroo. they asked if i wanted to go, but i didnt feel like driving 14 hours (from michigan to tennesee) to see a few bands or artists. i stayed home. they came back and had a blast. they were telling me all about it. i was like okay i probably should have gone, fuck. They loved the music festival and wanted to go to another one immediately. well electric
forest was coming up. it was only 3 hours away and in 2 weeks. they asked if i wanted to go. i looked at the lineup. who did i see? Tiesto. i had to go. i was so down.
2. Electric forest finally comes. we (Drake, Sam, and I) pack all our stuff and were off to a four day party in the woods. i had no idea what to expect. All i knew was that there was electronic music and this was my first experience with the scene. so im pumped. we get there and set up our camp site. i didn’t help at all. i cant build a box with 4 pieces of wood. so setting up a tent and canopy was out of the question. so i was in charge of handing them them the poles to hold up our tent. we set up camp and had a few hours to kill before the festival gates opened. so were smokin mad doobies just chillin. there was a joint or blunt in rotation at all times. they asked me if i wanted to try “molly” i was like “whats molly?” Molly is the purest form of ecstasy, MDMA. yes, yes i want to try molly. so i have no idea how much i bought but i bought enough. it was in a powder in a bag. they told me to take “dips” basically get some on your finger and eat it. ok easy enough. The festival gates finally open. We’re high as fuck just wandering around the festival. it was amazing. we came across a booth called “Spirithoods.” which are these really cool hats with a scarf and pockets. i tried one on and i had to have it. i bought the panda one. high as fuck i dropped $150 of my $200 that i brought with me for the weekend. Im now out of money on the first day. 100% worth it. Everyone loved my new hat. people were coming up and petting me. it was amazing. im accepted here. random strangers are coming up and starting conversation with me. this feels great as no one really talked to me in high school. im in love. this is the scene for me. i met so many amazing people it was ridiculous. this was all during the day. the music didn’t start until 12am. i was planning on seeing excision and kaskade that night. Around 10pm clouds start rolling in. im gettin nervous. At the time i was terrified of thunderstorms. it ended up storming like crazy, tornado sirens were going off, with hail the size of golf balls. i book it back to the tent. however there were probably 10s of thousands of tents. im lost as fuck, scared out of my mind. This girl came up to me sensing i was not having a good time. she helped me look for my tent. im about to cry and every where i look all i see are tents. everything looked the exact same and to help us out it was pitch black. the thunder and lightning are coming down like crazy. the hail is coming down in buckets luckily i had my hat on so it didnt really hurt to much. finally i see a flag in the air. “wait a minute i recognize that flag! over here its somewhere in this general area.” i told the girl. she was like “ok fuck yeah.” so i find my tent and she goes to find hers. thank you stranger. im in the tent still scared out of my mind. i hear someone on a walkie talkie walking by say that there are tornadoes and everyone needs to take cover. i about shit my pants. at this point i decided im going to go to sleep. if i wake up its over. if i die, i die in my sleep and have no idea it happened. My friends come back to the camp site
around 5am. They wake me up and we smoke a blunt in the tent. This was my first day of electric forest. Day 2, Friday, here we go. smokin blunts all day, the usual routine. my friends were talking about how crazy last night was, but they felt really bad about my first experience. i told them not to worry about it i still had a blast. i was wearing my hat and some sunglasses during the day and Sam told me i looked boss as fuck. after this statement plus all the random petting the day before, this hat was not leaving my head. during the day we wander around the festival some more and went into the forest. holy shit. this forest was crazy all decorated with different pieces of art. hammocks everywhere you could just lay in. we found 3 hammocks next to each other and chilled most of the day. well while we were in the hammocks i dropped my bag of molly. fuck. it was funny though. we’re high as fuck so whatever. my friends end up giving me some of theirs. Finally night rolls around and Tiesto is up first. 12am. i start taking mad dips out of my bag of molly. it tasted awful. it just tasted like you were eating chemicals. im listening to tiesto. and i feel sober. i didnt feel like i was rolling at all. i just couldnt stop dancing. at the time i was not the dancing type. so i knew i was feeling it. Im having the time of my life. i’m dancing like there is no tomorrow. i’m whipping out dance moves i could have never imagine i would be whipping out. i was dancing so hard i decided i needed some more room to bust out all my new moves. so i head more to the back of the crowd where i could dance more freely. the back is where i still hang out until this day. So im by myself dancing the night away. everyone around me is dancing, this is great. we’re all having the time of our lives. This was home for me. i finally found where i belonged. Once tiesto ended i came down from my roll. Once you come down you’re done. the night is over. for me at least. so I'm freezing cold now, one of the side effects of MDMA. so i head back to my tent. i remembered where it was this time thanks to the flag and went to bed. i got all snug in my blankets. I'm at pure bliss right now. i slept like a baby. So tiesto was my first electronic experience. I couldn't have asked for a better first experience. Day 3, Saturday, we wake up early around 7am or 8am. so we didnt get much sleep but when your tent is around 100 degrees fahrenheit you aren’t sleeping much longer. Daily routine, we spark a joint. today is an exciting day, our other friends showed up; Amy, Ian and Dawn. they couldn’t make it for the whole four days because they had shit to do. So they just got a 2 day pass. so they showed up and we’re talking to them about how crazy its been for the past 2 days. we start talking about the previous night, and how they lost me. i told them “no guys its straight i needed more room to dance so i moved more towards the back” and that i had a blast and met so many amazing people. Ian, Dawn, and Amy are pumped after hearing all our amazing stories. Honestly i don’t remember them right now, just that they were amazing. So during the day were showing Ian, Dawn, and Amy around the festival and they’re reactions were great because we experienced what they were experiencing 2 nights ago. they’re in love. we’re chilling in the grass just relaxing cause Drake, Sam and
I are dead tired. We’re about to roll up a blunt and Ian asks “you wanna put some bubba hash in there?” “yes, yes we do” so we roll up a fatty and thats just what we needed. I pass out almost immediately. Im out for like 4 or 5 hours. It was completely acceptable too. just taking a nap in the grass at main stage, listening to some String Cheese Incident. I wake up and have no idea what time it is or where my friends are. Whatever ill find them later. Im refreshed and ready to party. so i just kinda wander around waiting for 12am when the DJs start playing. Tonight we had bassnectar on the lineup. im pumped. ive never listend to bassnectar but ive heard of him and a lot of people love his music. bassnectar finally goes on. the lights are amazing people throwing glowsticks in the air. Im having like a panic attack im so excited. I start taking mad dips out of my molly. probably took 3 or 4 dips, not a lot but for a first timer it was a good amount. Im having a blast i’m jumpin up and down. i feel fuckin amazing. i feel euphoric. i didnt feel the euphoric the night before cause i didnt know what to expect. im loving life. life is amazing. but im seeing all the glow sticks being thrown in the air at every drop. Im pissed, i dont have any glowsticks. i start wandering around the crowd staring at the ground trying to find glowsticks. i ended up collecting about 20-25 glowsticks. I am ecstatic. The drop comes and throw those glow sticks in the air like im trying to throw them to the moon. talk about amazing. i start telling everyone “ dude i threw some glow sticks” now everyone wants glow sticks. Im now on a mission; find more glowsticks so i can share the excitement with my fellow ravers. i wander around the crowd some more for like 10 minutes trying to find more glow sticks. i have about 50 of them now. i go back to the group i just met with my glow sticks. they’re pumped as fuck i came back. We all screamed in excitement waiting for the drop so we could throw our glow sticks. One of the girls got too excited and threw hers before the drop. When the drop comes we jump high as we possibly can and throw those glowsticks like were pissed at the world. it was amazing. Im now partying with this new group of people i just met having a blast. i offer them some molly. they’re all for it. they’re faces lit up like a candle in the dark. they’re happy as can be. so now were all on the same level rolling balls, throwing glow sticks, dancing and partying like no tomorrow. i start wandering through the crowd, “ill catch you later guys!” As im wandering around the crowd. who do i run into? My friends Ian, Dawn, and Amy. Holy shit. talk about fucking magical. our faces light up, we didn’t know what to do so we jump and scream “fuck yeah!” i can promise you there is no better feeling in the world than when you’re at a festival rolling hard as fuck and you run into you’re group of friends that you lost hours ago. I chill with my friends for the rest of bassnectar. we had a blast. bassnectar ends and i come down from my roll. so im done for the night. back to the campsite i go. I remember the flag, that one of the campsites had so finding the tent was much easier than the first night. i got to bed freezing cold all snugged in my blankets.
Day 4, Sunday, wake up with the usual routine 8am spark a blunt. we are exhausted. we just lay around camp all day. sleeping in the sun just relaxing. we’re sick of sleeping on the ground. we just want a good night sleep in our own beds. and its only a 3 hour drive. so we decided that before we went out to the festival we were going to pack up all our stuff and drive home after pretty lights. bad idea. this day was mostly just chilling in the grass smoking blunts and napping. but 12am DJs start playing and first up was pretty lights. Ian’s pumped cause pretty lights is Ian's’ favorite. pretty lights is about to go on we all take the last of our molly. we’re feelin good. we’ve been sleeping all day so were ready to party. pretty lights goes on and his visual light show was crazy he had all these buildings set up on the stage like a city. it was really cool. a bunch of lasers shooting out into the crowd. definitely the coolest light show of the weekend. so we’re partying, dancing having a blast. even though our bodies were exhausted we had drugs, our artificial energy. pretty lights ends and were still rollin, were feelin good. its 2 or 3 in the morning after a 4 day weekend of little sleep and a lot of partying. Its a bad idea but Sam tells us he’s straight to drive home. he wasn’t. we’re all dead tired and once we sat down in the car the tiredness hit us. i didn’t care though i wasn’t driving, so getting home was Sam’s problem. i was sleeping. once again, my mindset was; i wake up and were home, or i die in my sleep. I passed out immediately. about 30 minutes later i hear a loud rugged sound. i wake up like what the fuck was that? Sam fell asleep and almost went off the road. we all wake up terrified. i didn’t care i was alive and thats all that mattered. Drake decides he’s going to drive the rest of the way home. We stop at a gas station, Drake fills up on some coffee and we drive home. We didn’t get home until 5 or 6 in the morning. but we got home and thats all that matters. 3. The rest of the summer all we could talk about was electric forest and how crazy it was. Talked about our favorite sets, all the cool people we met, our stories from the storm. It was great. My favorite set was tiesto. He killed it, and it being my first electronic experience it absolutely crazy. Sam and Drake told us the story about how they had share a porta potty to get out of the storm. They said it was rough and they got some weird looks when two guys walked out of a porta potty. i needed to know when the next rave was though. im in the scene now and i dont want out any time soon. The month of July went by and we didnt know of any raves coming up, but we were still recuperating from the forest so that was ok. August rolls around we find out about a rave with Flux Pavillion and Doctor P was that night. we bought our tickets and about an hour later they sold out. lucky us. This show was crazy one of the best shows ive been to this day. It was 16+ but whatever. My friend Drake went to the bathroom and he heard these 2 parents talking (must have been theyre kids first concert or something) he over hears them say “its like a giant party in here” that is exactly what it is a giant fuckin party. Everyone just having a blast. we lost Sam early on in the show. About an hour later i see him flying over the crowd crowd surfing. One of the camera men actually got a perfect picture of him flying through the crowd pointing at the camera. The venue put it on their website. It was one of the coolest pictures ive seen. i was sober for this show. i didnt know where to find molly. I still had a blast. This
was good. i showed myself I could have fun without the drugs. i remember i was at the bar getting some water and i was talking to this guy about the artists that were playing and he was like “yeah i saw them back in May and it was crazy” i thought that was the coolest thing in the world, that hes seen them before. i wanted to be able to say “ yeah i saw them back in...” so bad. this is when i decided i wanted to go crazy and go to just about every show that came to town.
4. Identity fest was up next on our rave calendar. i was obviously going to wear my hat. Identity fest was a one day festival i think it was 8 or 9 hours of nonstop music. there were i think 3 stages. the main stage had seats which was really lame. but this is where i saw le castle vania, kaskade, and Steve aoki all for the first time. and those are 3 of my favorite DJs to this day. we got there around 2pm right when doors opened, there was no one there. it was dead. we were like fuck i hope it fills up, which it did. Le castle vania was the first DJ we saw. he was on main stage with the seats. there were maybe 50 - 60 people in the crowd. some people were sitting down. this is when i fell in love with le castle vania because he had so much energy and love for what he was doing you would have thought he was playing in a stadium pack with thousands of people. but there werent there were 50. Not only did he have a lot of energy his music had a lot of energy and you couldnt help but dance. Even though the seats got in the way. After le castle vania we just kinda wandered around. i didnt know of any of the DJs cause i was still new to the scene. so we pretty much just went where our friend Trevor said would be bangin. we ended up at the rockstar stage which was in the parking lot, for most of the day, no seats. This is where we saw Steve Aoki for the first time. i thought he killed it. he had an inflatable raft that he would put people in and they were crowd surf in it. i thought this was the coolest thing in the world. i remember one girl was in the raft having a blast, fist pumping and dancing in the raft, and i was a little jealous. later during the set this girl comes up to me and was like “that was me in the raft!” i was like “oh my god thats awesome!” and gave her a hug. She petted my hat. One of those amazing moment you have at a rave, with the cool people you meet. After Steve Aoki we saw kaskade, and honestly i dont remember a thing from kaskade, and i was sober. weird. All i remember is there were seats and there wasn't a lot of room to dance. Still had a lot of fun though. 5. Next show wasn’t until september. Guess who it was. Tiesto! No one wanted to go so i ended up buying Drakes ticket for him so he would go with me. We had molly for this show. some really good molly. you measure molly in tenths of a gram like .1 or .2. most caps have .1 in them. the average amount for one person is .2 or 2 caps/pills. we each had 2 caps. This show was a life changer. I wasnt going to wear my hat to this show because it was inside and i was worried about overheating. i brought it though. We got there and i didnt wear it, the entire time we were in line Drake was telling me i should have worn the
hat. So we went back to the car and got it. Then i decided no, no, ill get hot. back in line we went. then i decided i wanted to wear it again. we made like 3 trips back to the car before going in about wearing this hat. so we Drake some attention to ourselves while having drugs on us. not a good idea. but i finally wore the hat. we get through security, it was scary. but they didnt find our molly. We get in and i pop mine immediately. I Go to the bathroom and get a water. right when i got my water it hit me. Im rolling the second hardest i have ever rolled until this day. we sprint to the crowd, there was dancing that needed to be done. We get down there porter robinson is opening for tiesto and drops Daft punks Around the World. This is one Drakes favorite songs. we had a blast. i lost Drake early into the night. but were used to losing eachother by now and we know we’ll find each other later, and my hat is kind of hard to miss. Drake finally makes it back to me. He made some friends; Kent and Greg. They were brothers and they were also at electric forest. we hung with them the rest of the night. we became good friends. i still talk to them to this day, 2 years later. i was peaking when tiesto dropped the song “Feel it in my Bones.” i remember standing there like “oh my god” this song is amazing. So now everytime i hear that song i think about the bond me and Drake had after the show. When you’re rolling you tend to have heart to heart conversations with each other and Drake being my best friend we had a heart to heart. We were still rolling after the show so we went back to his place and just listened to music and talked about our friendship and how much fun we had that night. it was really magical. This show was a game changer because i wore my hat and didnt over heat. so now im wearing it to every show.
6. Our next show was in october. we had a back to back. deadmau5 was friday and avicii was staurday. Honestly i didnt like deadmau5 before i saw him live. his music is more melodic and technical and i heard a few of his songs and wasnt sure how you could dance to it because there was no drop which i was used to. but i knew he wore a giant “mau5head” on stage and i wanted to see that live, i thought it was the coolest thing in the world. So were at deadmau5, Nate and 2 other girls joined us. i felt bad for Nate. he bought the wrong ticket so he got stuck by himself on the balcony. mistakes were made. But that was not about to effect our time. We’re getting ready to leave the car making sure everyone has they’re drugs hidden. going through security with drugs is so scary, but once you make it through you’re like “Hell Yeah!” We all get in safely everyone has their drugs. Nate has to go up stairs, it was kind of depressing. But he had molly so he still had a good time. I pop my molly, 2 caps right when we get in. On the way to the dance floor i see this guy with a giant home made mau5head on. it lit up in different colors and everything. honestly it was almost as cool as deadmau5s. i had to talk to this guy and tell him how sick his mau5head was. it turns out this guy was known as Detroitmau5. We go to the dance floor and funkagenda is playing. Never heard of this
guy before, but once again still kinda new to the scene. he was doing alright, i was rolling so was having a blast either way. I lost Drake again. And guess who he comes back with. Greg and Kent! amazing absolutely amazing. we chilled with them the rest of the night and formed a friendship. we kept in contact and talked about what other shows we were going to. this was great we needed to know of some more shows. Deadmau5 comes on, hes behind this giant cube, with a giant mau5head on his head (kind of looked like mickey mouse) and the eyes lit up. Okay im in love, this is the coolest thing i have ever seen. I was able to dance to his music too which i didnt think i was going to be able to do. i was rolling but starting to come down. this is not good, he just went on. so about 3/4 of the way through his set i was done i came down i wanted to go home. i chilled at the bar the rest of the night and talked to this one guy about how crazy deadmau5’s visuals were. We both agreed they were the best we’ve seen. We compared them to pretty lights and agreed deadmau5’s were better and that deadmau5 puts a lot of time and money into his stage production. we appreciate this. walking out of the venue i see this guy passing out cards. i was like “whats this” so i took one. it said “Detroitmau5” on it with a facebook link. i checked it out and it was a fan page for the guy in the mau5head. this was the coolest thing ever. i actually became friends with him and are still friends to this day. (you make a lot of friends in this scene) After the show we’re walking back to the car and this girl comes up to me “Panda Man!” i was kinda confused i was like “what?” but she was like “I saw you at Tiesto and recognized youre hat”! I was like “oh hell yeah, whats up” she was like “nothin just saying hi.” That is what started my rave career as “Detroit Panda Man” Avicii. We saw avicii in a warehouse with like 2000 people. 6 months later he was headlining Ultra, one of the biggest music festivals in the world. All because of one song; Levels. Levels is the greatest dance song of all time. i dont care what anyone else says. But it got over played and everyone hates it now. I still love it though. we’re at avicii, in this warehouse in a pretty shady area of Detroit. doors open at 8:00pm we get there around 9:00pm. we’re tired. we had deadmau5 the night before, were still kinda new to the scene, were tired. security was easy as fuck, it was a warehouse that eventually got shut down. they didnt care about anything. This is the coolest most underground venue i have ever been too. It was literally a warehouse with a stage and a bar. the bathrooms were porta potties outside. This is awesome. I didnt take my molly when i first got in thank god. After coming down at deadmau5 i decided i’m gonna take my molly right when the headliner comes on that way i can roll through the entire set. He didnt end up going on until 1:30am. We got there at 9:00pm so were just kinda walking around dead tired like lets go were trying to roll here. I met this one girl, Kathy, were still friends to this day, actually she’s Sam and Ians Roommate at college. She taught me the handshake to trade kandi. kandi is bracelets made of pony beads that a lot of ravers wear. It was the “PLUR” handshake,
peace, love, unity, respect. The coolest thing ive ever seen. Im trading kandi with everyone now. showing people the handshake. Avicii finally goes on, we pop our molly, and were feelin great. He’s killin it and he drops levels. holy shit i have never seen a crowd react the way they did when he dropped this song. there were no lyrics but people were singing along to the beat jumping like crazy. It was amazing. im dancing hard as fuck, i dont give a fuck how tired i am, the energy from his set along with my rolls, we are set! During Aviciis set another girl comes up to me and calls me panda man. she saw me at deadmau5 the night before. i was like “hell yeah, i was totally there!” we talked for a little bit, she was really cool. couldnt tell you her name but she was dope. the night finally comes to an end and we go home at like 4 in the morning. were dead tired. i dont think we said a single word on the way home we were so tired. but totally worth it. we had a great ass weekend. 7. Panda Man? dope people know me as panda man, this is awesome. i was like what if someone made me a facebook page? how dope would that be? thatd be hella dope. i was like no what if i make it myself. so i made myself a facebook page “Detroit Panda Man.” i used detroit because i assumed that everyone with a panda spirithood got called panda man. i thought my facebook page was the coolest thing in the world. All my friends thought it was cool/funny. they nor i had any idea what it would turn into. So i have this facebook page and i got like 20 “likes” from all my friends, this is awesome. so im trying to figure out how i can expand this panda man page. and i remember the card that Detroitmau5 gave me. i was like “oh good idea, good idea” So i made business cards with my picture and my facebook link on them and i passed them out by the doors at the end of shows. a lot of people looked at it like “the fuck is this?” a lot of people dropped them on the ground. a few people kept them. one person asked me he was like “what is this?” i told him its my facebook page. he was like “thats stupid” and dropped the card. I noticed after each show i was gaining around 10-15 likes on my page. Im ecstatic. i ran into my first “fans” at datsik. Jane and Nicole. This is when i had my first picture taken. it was a terrible picture, the flash didnt go off and barely all three of us fit in the picture. but i still have that picture to this day. and im still friends with Jane and Nicole to this day. i actually just saw them the other day. 8. Zeds Dead was up next. Zeds Dead was dope. the music was alright but i met some cool people. the 16 year old. i like the 16 year old. im chillin dancing to zeds dead and this kid next to me looks young as fuck. i ask him “dude, how fuckin old are you?” he goes “16” hell yeah dude 16 year old out at a rave on a school night how dope is that. This kid loves electronic music. unfortunately hes to young for most shows. so he can only go to the all ages and 16+ shows. but hes the highlight of my all ages shows is seeing him. hes dope as fuck. reminded me a bit of myself.
In high school Drake and i would go to concerts during the school week and everyone asked us the same question “how old are you guys?” so i like the 16 year old. i also got to know one of the camera men that worked at the Middle Oak venue. he would always take my picture, and tell people “dude this guy has his own facebook page!” i would just smile yeah, like what do you say to that, thanks? but he was cool. i still see him at shows today and he always takes my picture. 9. Skream and Robga. This was the first show i went to that i didn’t really enjoy. it was all old school dubstep and im not a huge dubstep fan. but my friend Chris from high school got really drunk and ended up having to go to the hospital. he was incoherently drunk. he couldn’t walk and his friends had to hold him up on the dance floor. everyone was asking if he was ok. finally and luckily, they decided he was not okay and that he needed to go to the hospital. that saved his life. they said if he hadn’t gone to the hospital he probably would have died. i never found out if it was just alcohol or if he was on other drugs. 10. Shazzzam was our next event, in november. Kent and Greg told us about it. This was the most underground event i have been to. It was at that shady warehouse where we saw avicii back in october. Shazzzam wasnt a DJ it was a party, but there were 8 or 9 DJs that played. This is where i saw mord fustang and dirty phonics for the first time. both names have gotten pretty big since seeing them in a wear house. This party was dope. I didnt roll this night. i had molly but didnt take because it went til 5 and i didnt want to come down early. still had a blast though. There were fire spinners, girls dancing in cages, there might have been maybe one or 2 security guards, that was it. We went here with Drake, Rob, Robs Brother Austin, and Donnie. Rob almost didnt get in because he didnt have any money and their ATM wasn’t working. We all got in and were waiting on Rob but weren't sure what was taking so long, and Donnie was like “cmon guys lets just go” we were like “no, fuck you dude we have to wait for Rob.” good thing we waited because we ended up having to throw him money because the ATM was broken. But he got in and thats all that matters. i ended up seeing my friend Stacy there. i have no idea how i know her. we were friends in highschool but she didnt go to my school i met her through friends of friends, but were actual friends now. she happened to be at identitiy fest. She asked me “were you at ID fest?” i was like “yeah i was.” “i totally saw you there! i wasnt sure if it was you or not though.” i was like “ah dam!” we chilled for a little bit it was awesome. We ended up leaving around 3:45am and good thing cause the cops showed up at 4:00am and shut it down. I don’t remember why though. but we got lucky because i didnt take my molly so i would have had drugs on me. bad news bears that would have been. They didnt have a shazzzam the next year because it got shut down. But they’re having another one this year. its at a different venue though. ive never been there before. but i hope its dope.
11. our next show was bassnectar at an arena. i went with Drake and Nate. it was pretty close to home so i was pumped. i was sober for this show so thats good. having fun without the drugs. bassnectar killed it as normal. big gigantic opened for him. they’re kind of like a jazz electronic. they have a lap top, a drum set, and a saxophone. they were pretty good. i was digging them. when bassnectar went on it was next level shit. straight killed it. it was at an arena though and it was first come first serve for the main floor. so some of my friends had to sneak down, but it wasnt hard, they just couldn’t go to the bathroom or get water once they got down. they found us cause of my hat. i remember i moved to the side and this girl was like “great now i have a panda in front of me and cant see.” i turned around apologized and gave her a piece of kandi. she smiled, she was no longer mad. we chilled for some of the night. it was cool. At the end of the show Drake and I were in the lobby looking for Nate. while waiting for Nate this guy comes up to me and asks if i was the “Detroit Panda Man” i chuckled “yeah thats me” he was like “oh my god dude, im from Minneapolis and see you’re shit all over facebook, can i get a picture?” i was like “of course.” Drakes jaw dropped and started laughing like holy shit. i was a little in shock as well. Minneapolis thats some out of state shit. The guy thanks me for the picture and leaves. i look at Drake “dope dude, dope” he was like “fuck yeah thats dope, thats crazy as fuck.” we told Nate and Nate was probably more excited than i was. “holy shit thats fuckin crazy bro, i wish i would have been there for that!” The ride home we were all just like holy shit Minneapolis. 12. Fast forwarding to december. Le castle vania was coming back to town. he was playing at the grime, which is more of an underground venue. this was my first time there. it was December 23rd two days before christmas. This venue was grimey as fuck. (but eventually becomes one of my favorite venues) I walk in there and theres 2 rooms theres a front room with a small stage and a bar and a back room with just a stage. Im walking to the back room through this hallway and im thinking to myself “i feel like im in a heroin documentary” it was grimey. so im gettin some weird vibes. This was our first time at this venue. It was Drake, Nate, Ian, Sam, Jake, and I I believe. Then we met some friends there. we didn’t know what time he was going on because it was our first time at this venue. we got there around 12:00am he went on at 1:30. i actually saw him wandering around the crowd. so i went up and talked to him for a second. Real cool guy. Down to earth, he was awesome. there were maybe 30 people here. Another small crowd when we saw him. We took our molly, 2 caps again. Our friend took 3. i thought he was nuts. i was like dude you’re gonna die (later 3 becomes a joke for me). Le castle vania goes on. We’re literally like right on top of him we were so close. it was awesome and just as before he had the energy as if he was playing in front of a stadium of thousands. he became my one of favorite DJs, probably second after Tiesto. We’re rollin balls going hard as fuck to his dirty electro set. it was nuts. We’re pretty much talking to him while he spins. we had a blast, one of my favorite shows.
We’re still rolling as the show ends. There was a snow storm. Drake was driving (after our electric forest incident with Sam, Drake likes to be in control of the wheel) maybe 15-20 mph. it was not straight to drive but whatever we wanted to get home. we watched 2 cars slip off the side of the road. Now we’re all back seat drivers. “careful Drake, stay slow, stay slow.” We finally get home. took us like an hour should have only taken us 30 minutes. but we made it home safe so we don’t give a fuck. We’re home safe thats all that matters. its like 4 or 5 in the morning. now we have to drive home from Drakes place to my place. no big deal we made it home so we’re straight. That was Jakes first show. even though there wasn’t a huge crowd he was rolling and he had a blast. So hes happy. 13. Now we’re in 2012. no new years eve party (that i knew of). i was kinda pissed ive always wanted to go to a new years eve party. Especially since Kaskade played a 12 hour set in vegas for new years, 12am-12pm. you could have gone home went to bed and came back in the morning and he would have still been playing. crazy. Now we’re at like 200-300 likes on facebook. So were doing good. i decided to email spirithoods about how they’re hat (its actually called a hood but whatever) has changed my life. I basically told them about how i went from having 6 or 7 friends in highschool to random people coming up and petting me and wanting to start conversation with me. I told them “i was like yeah everyone asks me where i got my hat and i tell them proudly that its a spirithood and every hood you buy spirithoods donate 10% of theyre profits to different animal charities.” spirithoods emailed me back. i was surprised. i didnt think they were going to email me back. but they did. They offered me a spot in their brand ambassadors program. basically i have a code and if people use that code to buy a spirithood they get a 15% discount and i get 15% commision. Holy shit. I couldn't have asked for a better response. This helped out immensely. So i made new business cards with my info on one side and the spirithood info on the back. i passed these out at shows now and i got a lot of great responses. one i remember, this kid was like “whats this?” i told him “its a discount for spirithoods.” he was like “hell yeah my girl wants one so bad and her birthday is coming up, you’re the best dude!” This made me feel great. People were still dropping my cards but not as many. i got my first check from spirithoods. i thought it was going to be like 50 bucks. hell no. it was nearly 400 (and that was my smallest check from them, i got checks monthly) Im ecstatic. i end up making more money from spirithoods going to shows than i was working. Life is good. 14. Our next show was Avicii again, some time in early january. Now hes playing at The Mill which is one of the bigger venues in Detroit. Because of what? Levels. This time it was Drake and I in a car and Nate and few of his other friends in different car. Nate got shafted again. it was on a thursday and the one girl that drove with Nate had to be home at 11. so he had to leave early. I wasn’t happy. I felt bad for Nate. He might have saw half the show. So we meet up in the parking lot and the kids Nate went with
wanted to get there early. We usually get there late so we don't have to wait in line and right when we get there the headliner usually goes on. so were there super early just kind of walking around the music hasn't even started yet. Drake and i are just kind of rolling our eyes at each other but whatever. This was a dope show. i dont remember who opened for him but, he wasnt that great. we just wanted to see avicii. i actually ended up running into some kids from high school there. i was surprised to see them. i wasn't friends with them but i talked to them, after all, unity. avicii went on at 11. (remember this i will get back to it when i talk about kaskade) Nate told his friend “sucks for you were not leaving yet.” i dont blame him. he ended up leaving around 12 or 12:30 i believe. Avicii opened up with levels. he walks up on stage, puts his hand up in the air, and we hear “oooooohhhhhh sometimes gotta get a good feelin” that was the chorus of the song levels, the greatest dance song of all time. The beat dropped and the whole crowd starts jumping in unity. if there was no music you would have thought there was a stampede of elephants. it was magical. holy shit. you look around everyone jumping with a huge smile on their face just having a blast. everyone just loves the music. we dance all night. i think it went until 1:00 or 1:30. i was chillin with Nate when he had to leave and this girl comes up to me. “Are you panda man?” i smile “yeah thats me” she was like “oh my god i like you on facebook, can i get a picture?” “yeah of course” this was the first time Nate witnessed someone recognizing me. he was pumped. Just like “hell yeah dude, thats dope as fuck!” After Nate left i went to find Drake and we partied the rest of the night. We had a blast this was the second time seeing Avicii so i was talking to someone and guess what i said. “yeah i saw him back in october and he fuckin killed it.” i always wanted to say that and finally i could say it. i felt cooler than ever. “yeah I've seen this guy before.” why i thought i was cool i don't know. but i did. 15. January comes to a close and there wasn’t a show that we knew of until the end up february. so we we’re going through withdrawls. but it was another back to back. We had Steve Aoki followed by Big gigantic, the guys that opened for bassnectar. These were pretty much the last shows Drake went to, i dont know why. Steve Aoki was dope. I love Steve Aoki. He’s an entertainer. he gets really involved with the crowd. i really liked this about him. he started a new thing at this event. he would throw cake at people. Everyone wanted to get cake thrown at them. Fuck that not me, if he threw cake at me i would have been pissed. So i stayed away from the front. we (Drake, Sam, Ian, and I i believe) get to Steve Aoki, snuck our rolls in we’re good. Datsik opened for him. when we got there Datsik was playing, not a huge fan of Datsik but he was killing it. so were just dancing waiting for Steve Aoki. once datsik ended and i popped my molly. So im feeling great. i had a blast, like i always do. Steve Aoki comes on and hes doin his thing. either his light show was crazy as fuck or there were bad drugs going around because 3 people had seizures. it was scary I've never seen someone has a seizure before. the person dropped to the ground and everyone
spread out around him and was calling for security. security rushed in there and got them out as soon as possible. it was kind of a buzz kill honestly, but i still had a blast. i remember when he went “white raver rafting” thats what he calls it when he rides in the raft. remember from identity fest? he climbed these huge speakers, probably 20 foot speakers, and jumped off of them onto the raft. i thought this was the coolest thing in the world. I was like “damn thats crazy.” After Steve Aoki we had big gigantic the next night. It was just Drake, Sam and I. they wanted to drink so i was the designated driver. i wasn't a huge fan of big gigantic this time. i just wanted the show to end so i could pass out my cards to be honest. We ran into our friend from high school lauren. we havnt seen her in a while because she went to school in chicago, so seeing her was really cool. she has a spirithood. she actually used my code to get it. so that was dope. she thanked me for the discount. i told her she was more than welcome. I also met this one girl, she had the skrillex haircut (half of her head shaved) so shes cool as fuck. her name was Helen. we talked for a little bit, couldnt tell you what we talked about because i honestly dont remember. i basically just told her that her hair was cool as fuck. big gigantic finally fuckin ends. so im pumped cause i can go pass out my cards and get my name bigger while giving out discount codes for spirithoods. once again people were thanking me cause spirithoods are pretty popular in the rave scene but they're expensive. but lucky for these people i can get them a discount. so people love me. i feel great about myself. spreading the love. thats what im all about, is spreading the love, helping people out. After tonight im at around the 350 - 400 “likes” on my facebook page. making progress. This unfortunately was the last show i went to with Drake for a long time. i dont know why. i guess he grew up or something. he just wasn't down to party anymore. but i wasn't done. shit i was just getting started. 16. I beleive the next show was porter robinson. its the middle of march. i hit up Drake “yo porter robinson is in a couple weeks.” he says “ im gonna pass” “pass? the fuck you mean you're gonna pass?” he was out porter was playing at a club called NightLife in the same city where Ian and Sam went to school. so we hung out during the day and went to the show that night. this is when i met Collin. Collin was Ian and Sam’s friend they met at school. he later becomes their roommate. Collins cool as fuck, i like Collin. smart as fuck too he was going to school for engineering. we were smoking weeds and Collin decided we were gonna make something, i don’t remember what they called it, but he invented it as far as he knows. he basically wrapped a joint paper around a bowl so the bowl was as wide as a normal bowl but it was as tall as a joint. probably fit 1.5 - 2 grams in this bowl. i was like holy shit dude. it was really cool. it fuckin worked too. We’re just walking around campus i have my hat on and feel out of place. everyone we see is smart as fuck going to one of the top colleges in the state, U of M. I
was currently going to a community college at the time. i was high fuck. when im high i get really insecure and paranoid about myself. thats why i dont really smoke weed but i like smoking it with my close friends cause i know they’re not judging me. we end up hanging out with their friend Kathy, Kathy was the girl that taught me the handshake at Avicii, and her friend Helen, the girl i met at big gigantic with the Skrillex haircut. small world i was being kind of awkward i was high as fuck and out of my comfort zone. but it was still fun. we ended up going to Kathy and Helen’s dorm and hung out for a while. they had one of those special dorms where they had their own bathroom and everything. Sam, Ian, and Collin were jealous cause they had a normal dorm. Night time finally rolls around, we start getting all of our drugs together and what not, getting ready for the night. we decided we could have walked a few miles to the club or take the bus. no fuckin way was i walking. because then you have to walk back at 2 in the morning dead tired. i dont think so. We ended up taking the bus. which was fine on the way there. We get to the club around 11:00pm small line. most people were already inside. I met this one guy there who had an American flag bandana on. he was pretty cool. no idea what his name was though. we get inside and you have to walk up these stairs to get to the dance floor. i thought it was really cool, until i saw the crowd. bros on bros on bros. Bros are the dark side of the rave scene. the rave scene is all about dancing and enjoying the music. bros dont give a fuck about the music they just want to hit on girls and get laid. rave girls dont like this other ravers dont like this either. bros tend to stand out. they tend to wear neon tank tops that promote molly and have big muscles. i just ignore bros. some are nice don't get me wrong but they're in the scene for the wrong reasons. but porter finally goes on. i take all my molly at once. this way it all hits me at the same time and i roll hard as fuck. im rolling so i don't care about the bros I'm just trying to dance my ass off. Drake and I saw the end of porter when he opened for Tiesto. This time we saw Porter it was just him and he destroyed the dance floor. hes crazy good at mixing he was mixing 4 songs together at once. it was ridiculous. best mixer ive seen to this day. Hes my age. at the time he was only 18. his birthday is actually a few weeks before mine. so that means he was 18 opening for Tiesto and Tiesto is pretty much the number 1 DJ in the world. some people will argue that but whatever. Porter drops every banger of the year. the whole time was just banger after banger after banger non stop. i loved this. i like a lot of energy in my sets. even though some times you get tired. but, molly. theres no breaks when you’re rolling on molly. porter comes to an end at 2:20am he went 20 mintues over cause he liked our energy. what a great guy. so its like 2:30 in the morning im soaking wet from sweat. im tired and im coming down. i want to go home. we get on the bus and it is jammed pack. im standing in the aisle way extremely uncomfortable, because i get claustrophobic so this 20 minute bus ride felt like an hour.
Finally back to the dorm i say my good byes “nice raving with you guys” and im out. i get home around 3:30am i live like 40 minutes away. i take a shower because im soaking wet and im cold from the molly. This shower feels fuckin amazing. i stood under the water until the hot water ran out. finally got in bed freezing cold i had like 6 blankets, i slept like a baby. then i had class at 9:00am, yeah i didn't go. 17. Its still march. and we find out about the electric forest 2012 lineup. the excitement of a festival line up for ravers is basically like a 6 year olds christmas morning. there were some bangers on this lineup but honestly compared to the first year electric forest this lineup was a joke. if only i realized how dope the previous years lineup was last year. but it was my first electronic experience so i had no idea. there were a few names we weren't s sure of so we checked them out on youtube. dada life. we checked out dada life. holy shit. we needed to see these guys. 2 guys from sweden obsessed with bananas. if you wore a banana suit they would bring you on stage. this was awesome. these guys were a must see. well it turns out they were playing at this new EDM club called Bright City the following week. we were excited. we kinda wanted to wait to see them for the first time at the forest. but fuck that we couldn't wait. we all bought our tickets that day. dada life finally rolls around. i drive all the way out to ann arbor 40 minutes to meet with my crew. it was Ian, Sam, Dawn, Collin and I. we head out to Bright City. it was like an hour drive but whatever. on the way there we were on the highway and this car next to use is clearly filled with ravers i stick my head out and yell to them. they start yelling back “Dada Life!?” “Fuck yeah dada life!” i almost lost my hat sticking my head out the window. i would have been pissed. We’re all like holy shit dude what are the chances! we get to the Bright City club and there were a shit ton of people. the parking lot was full so we had to find a different place to park. we park the car and Collin decides he wants to roll for the first time. okay fuck yeah dude. we all take a little bit out of each of our bags and give it to Collin. Collin also wore a banana suit and we also brought bananas to throw in the crowd cause dada life loves bananas so it fit. we get inside and someone immediately recognizes me and wants a picture. so we took a picture and i gave them a card “send it to me ill put it on my facebook page” i started saying this to everyone that wanted a picture. the place is packed. we were way in the back and could barely move. but it was still sweet. within 10 minutes of being in there our bananas went from green to brown it was so hot and humid in there. Dada life goes on at 12am, its a club so 12am-2am. it was a 2 hour set. cant complain with that. its like 11:30 so were just waiting for dada life. i notice a lot of spirithoods. there were a lot of ravers at this club so i was pumped. not nearly as many bros as the NightLife club. There were also a lot of banana costumes, Collin being one of them. Dada Life finally goes on. the lights flash and the music starts. its loud as fuck. the whole crowd goes crazy. we lost Collin within minutes. Collins rolling for the first time so who knows what he's doing. we’ll find him later. dada life throws the fuck down. they
open with happy violence. this is the song we saw online that made us want to see them. so right off the bat were going hard as fuck. were all rolling dancing having a great time. thank god we weren’t in the front because they were spraying champagne all over everyone. if they got champagne on me i would have been pissed. so luckily we were in the back. we decide we should probably try and find Collin. there were a bunch of banana suits so we started with them, Collin obviously had to be one of them. getting through the crowd with a train of 4 was difficult becasue it was so crowded. we made it about 10 feet and got stuck. so we chilled there like fuck it. who was in front of us? the guys we saw on the fuckin highway! it was magical. i slapped him on the back, he turns around i was like “what up dude!?” he was like “oh my god its you guys!” we had a bro hug and made small talk with them for a minute. no idea what we were talking about, it was loud as fuck, you could barely hear yourself think. about half way through their set maybe a little further in. they started bringing the banana costumes on stage. who do we see? fuckin Collin! Collin was on stage in his banana suit. he is clearly having a blast. we’re all laughing our asses off like fuck yeah go Collin. hes up there doing this awkward dance like “i have no idea what im doing right now but i love it.” We’re telling everyone around us “thats our friend, its his first time rolling!” everyone gave us high fives. the show finally ends and we meet up with Collin. we’re all ecstatic for Collin. we get back to the car and ask Collin “how was rolling?” Collins like “i didn’t really feel it” we all burst out laughing “Collin at porter robinson you barely moved. tonight we lost you and found you on stage.” “okay you're right i totally felt it, that was fuckin awesome” we finally get back to ann arbor after an hour drive. then i have to drive another 40 minutes to my place. im dead tired so a shower and my memory foam bed never sounded so nice. i get home around 4:00am jump in the shower get my six blankets and im off to bed. luckily there was no class in the morning. so i wouldn't feel guilty for not going. 18. April. April was a good month. we had Rusko, Feed Me, and Laidback Luke. Rusko was first. All my friends had seen rusko, but this was my first time seeing him. so i was pumped. i went with Ian. we had a blast. i was sober for this show so that was good. rusko killed it. he had a lot of energy on stage. he was probably going harder than the crowd was. it was either rusko or feed me that i met Tron. i dont know his actual name he just told me it was Tron. cool guy i still see him at shows today. he had a spirithood so i had to talk to him. he was part of the “tribe.” if you have a spirithood you are part of the tribe. ruskos light show was pretty cool. it was no pretty lights or deadmau5 but it was still cool. there were light up letters that moved around behind him that spelt out “rusko” pretty cool, nothing crazy but still cool. it was just me and Ian at this show but we still had a blast. i dont remember why the rest of the crew didnt come but they didnt. no big deal
Next was feed me. Drake came to this show so that as dope, i havnt partied with him in a few months. But Drake saw feed me at electric forest the first year and loved him so he came. i had never seen feed me before but i liked his music. feed me’s light show was really cool. it was like a giant creepy smile that he was behind and the teeth had screens on them that showed different visuals along with blood dripping down the teeth. it was sweet, but not as sweet as i thought it was going to be. the teeth needed to be bigger. but still dope. im sure it was expensive though. feed me is where i met this guy Papa Cuz. Here is why i love the rave scene. he was up front and i only saw him from the back. i actually thought he was the guy from NightLife with the american flag bandana. so i work my way up to him and slap him on the back “whats up dude!?” he turns around and looks at me like “who the fuck are you?” “sorry i totally thought you were someone else.” he was like no “its straight dude.” We talked, i told him the story about who i thought he was. and we became friends. i see him at shows all the time now. Thats what i love about the rave scene we all go to the same shows and get to know each other its amazing. one giant rave family. A rave family is basically your crew who you see at every show. the bonds you make with people. its great. pretty much every raver has a rave fam. if you dont have a rave fam you dont go to enough shows. or youre shy. but even if youre shy people will come up and talk to you. everyone in the rave scene is nice as fuck. we just want to have a good time. and if one persons not having a good time we change that immediately. Laidback Luke was up next. ive wanted to see him for a while now. i heard his essential mix online. An essential mix is basically an hour long set of music a DJ makes for a radio station called BBC radio 1. his essential mix was my favorite so i was pumped to see him. He played at the club NightLife with all the bros trying to get laid. Laidback Luke was Ian, Sam, Collin, and I. Drake didn't want to go unfortunately. so i hung out with Sam, Ian, and Collin during the day and we partied at night. during the day we didnt do much just kind of hung out and talked about how excited we were for laidback luke. We get to the club at 11:00pm and the line is long as fuck. we didnt get in until like 12:15am so we missed the beginning of Laidback luke. i was a little upset but whatever. so we get in there and i start taking dips out of my bag of molly imediately. the taste is horrid. it tastes like chemicals, because thats what it was a bunch of chemicals. i start rolling and, im not really feelin the music. every drop was the same and it was a drop i didnt really like. a drop is basically when they drop the beat and everyone starts dancing. around 1:00am i fight breaks out. i roll my eyes you've got to be kidding me. im pissed. god dam bro starting a fight because someone was dancing with the girl he was trying to get with. There is no fighting in the rave scene. everyone loves everyone. but we’re in a club where there are a lot of bros. bros are the anti christ of the rave scene. and this is why. a fight, really? Laidback Luke ends and i was disappointed. i love his music but those drops were all the same and i wasnt feeling them. he deserves another shot though. so if he
comes back to town i’m obviously seeing him again. At this point were around 900 “likes” on facebook. 19. May. may was a relaxed month. avicii was supposed to come to town but ended up canceling. i was pissed. i really wanted to see him again. At the end of may was DEMF Detroits Electronic Music Festival. its actually called movement i believe, but everyone calls it demf. i only went the last day because my friends were busy and i didn't want to go by myself. so i ended up going just the last day with Sam We finally reached 1,000 “likes” on facebook. Sam thought this was nuts. DEMF is awesome though its a lot of old school house music. and a lot of huge name DJs started out playing DEMF. skrillex, bassnectar, and deadmau5 all played DEMF previous years, and those are some of the biggest names in dance music. Monday. i meet Sam and our friend from high school, Jay, at Sam’s place. we cruise down to detroit and meet up with Kathy at her dorm. she was taking summer classes at wayne state. we pick up Kathy then we go and get our molly. we’re in detroit in a neighborhood we should not have been in. Sam goes into this house by himself. im nervous im like “Sam be fuckin careful.” the dealer didn't want anyone else coming in to hide his identity. Sam was in there for like 15 minutes. im very uncomfortable. theres people walking around with pit bulls. kind of looking at our car. i look at Jay, “Sam needs to hurry up.” these 15 minutes felt like hours. finally Sam comes out in one piece. “Sam that was risky.” no dude its fine thats my friend. okay whatever lets get to the festival. We get to the festival and the line is long as fuck. luckily someone in line recognized me so we went and cut in line with him. made small talk until we got in. they searched us but we hid our molly well. we were good to go. we get in and Sam starts yelling “Detroit Panda Man 1,000 likes on facebook!” i was acting kind of awkward like, what do you say to that? thanks? yeah im awesome? i didnt know. but it was pretty cool i guess. i lost Sam, Kathy, and Jay almost immediately, but we’ll find them later. i did a lot of socializing with my “fans” more than i was seeing music being played. this was fine though i didn't mind. i love meeting new people. i was going to see Dillon Francis but someone told me he pre records his set. so i decided not to see him. i should have though because i end up really liking him in the future. he apparently killed it too. i saw zeds dead again. they were sweet i really enjoyed them. but claude von stroke was my favorite, i rolled for his set so thats probably why. but i ended up seeing my friend Stacy there, the girl from shazzzam. she loves claude von stroke. i ended up chilling with her for pretty much all of his set. his stage was really cool. it was facing the water of the detroit river and the crowd was on the grass. i love being in the grass so im pumped. he laid down a dirty set. i couldnt find him on stage because there were so many people up there dancing. they must have gotten VIP tickets or something i dont know. but it took me like a half hour to finally find him on the stage. I finally found him and was like “boom! there he is.” i was really excited i finally found him. he closed out the festival with a banging set.
i was really pumped for the after party it was afrojack. i love afrojack but he never comes to detroit. but just like avicii, it got cancelled. i was really bummed I've wanted to see Afrojack for a while now. 20. Its finally summer mom tells me i need to find a job, and that i cant rely on spirithoods for the rest of my life. well a walmart was opening up just around the corner from my house. so i applied. they called me back and wanted an interview. so im at the hiring center for like 3 hours. because they actually called all 3 of my references and couldn’t get a hold of the one because they changed their number or something. so they asked if i had any other references i said only family and on the application they said you couldnt be related to your references. they said whatever thats fine because ive been in the waiting room for 3 hours now. so they’re interviewing me and they said they had an opening for cart pusher. i was like are you serious? i applied for every position except cart pusher and maintence. but whatever i took the job. i actually ended up loving it. i was outside all day there were no managers watching me so i could do whatever i wanted as long as the carts weren’t over flowing the corrals. my boss was a dick though, his name was mike. he would always try to intimidate you like he was better than you. i understand his frustration though, because he was the co manager and he was in probably his early to mid 50s and our store manager was 30. i can see why he would be frustrated. he didnt like me though, the store wasn't open yet, we were still stocking all of the shelves and everything. it was the day before we opened at 4:00pm we all went home at 5:00pm. we were moving these boxes of watermelons and he asked me to grab a pallet jack and help. well i have never used a pallet jack before so im struggling just trying to get this thing to move, let alone move a giant box of watermelon. we end up spilling and dropping probably 20 watermelon busting open all over the floor. his hands fly in the air “this is what i get for working with rookies” alright fuck you too buddy. ever since that incident he treated me like dirt. I told myself when i found this job, i will not miss a rave because of work. i dont care how tired i am i will not do it. 21. Its now june and our next show is nervo at the Bright City. i love nervo I've wanted to see them for a while. nervo is 2 twin sisters. i have a crush on the one twin, Mim. it was a glo out so it was a black light party. bros on bros on bros. we’re like fuck. but whatever. it was Sam, Ian, Collin, Dawn and I. we walk in and there is a make up artist air brush painting peoples faces and bodies. i had to get my face painted. i was the only one of my friends that got painted. i got polka dots, i have no idea why. i rolled really hard at this show. i started with .2 but then Sam let me have the left overs of his. so im having a blast. nervo comes on and they open with “the way we see the world.” this was the one song Sam wanted to see but he was in the bathroom. unlucky Sam. Nervo’s killin it. there weren’t a lot of people there cause it was a sunday
night. but im front row goin hard as fuck. mim blows me a kiss and my heart drops. i feel like a school girl. i turn to my friends “you guys just see that!?” they were like “fuck yeah we saw that!” so im pumped, this night was a success. The following friday was Felix Cartal at the same club. we didnt end up going because in 2 weeks he was going to be playing at electric forest. so we passed on him and just saw him at the forest. 22. Electric Forest 2012 rolls around. its the last weekend in june. we all crash at Sam’s place and get ready to leave in the morning. we went with a much bigger group this year and i hated it. ill explain in a second. i think we had 3 or 4 cars at Sam’s then we were meeting people in east lansing to follow us. im pumped our friend Jeff came with us. this was his first electronic experience. i was like “Jeff i was in your position last year, you’re about to have a fuckin amazing time.” Jeff is pumped. he's going to roll for his first time too. im probably more excited for Jeff than he is. We leave in the morning around 7:00am. This year i brought 2 grams with me. my friends had a bunch more, they were planning on selling a lot of it. which they did. we had lsd, and 2cb on us as well and we’re smokin blunts the whole way there. i keep telling Sam “drive straight dude, we have multiple felonies on us” im paranoid as fuck. i don't like smoking in the car and we had a 3 hour drive ahead of us. this was a long 3 hours. i was paranoid/nervous the entire time. smoking was a bad idea. we’ve almost made it to the forest. and the cops are randomly pulling cars over and searching them. im about to shit my pants. our drugs were hidden, but still scary shit. we ended up making it past the cops so they didn't search our car, thank god. we finally get near the gates of the festival and they were “searching” vehicles. they literally opened our trunk and shut it. didnt touch a thing. so we’re like fuck yeah. were in a gridlock so everyones out of there cars chilling getting pumped for for the festival. people are walking around passing out beers, and joints. we’re having a good time. people are playing hacky sack, frisbee. life is good. we finally make it through the gates and are following this guy to our camp site. we get our 7 or 8 cars together and we immediately claim camping territory. we set up all of our tents and canopies...in the fire emergency aisle. fuck, we now have to move everything. it didnt take long but it was just a hassle. we get everything set up and we sit in our chairs under the canopy. we we’re in 3 circles. each group had their own circle. own blunt rotation. we were not one big group. i did not like this. so you're telling me we stopped to pick you guys up and you’re just going to use our shit? fuck i didn't know like 3 of the people and no one introduced us. im pissed. but whatever. this was my second year at the forest so i chilled at the campsite most of the day instead of wandering around checking everything out. i mean i still wandered around just not as much as the previous year. i ended up leaving the campsite around 7:00pm and i think wolfgang gartner went on at 9:00pm Jeff really wanted to see him so im obviously chilling with Jeff. its his first festival and first time rolling. were at wolfgang gartner we start dipping our molly. Jeff
doesnt like the taste. i let him have some water. wolfgang goes on and Jeff goes nuts. i lost him fairly quickly. losing friends tends to happen a lot. but he’ll be fine. wolfgang destroys it. afterward i head toward the back to sit down for a second. i meet up with Sam, and Trevor. they’re like “wheres Jeff?” “i lost him” Jeff comes sprinting. “oh there he is.” Jeff is having a blast running around loving everything. after wolfgang we end up just wandering around. and we passed borgore. not a huge fan of borgore and my friends hate borgore. but we walked passed him and we were about to enter the forest. you could still hear borgore and he was killing it. i was like “sorry guys i gotta check out borgore” and sprinted to the ranch stage which is main stage. i get there and im having a blast. take a couple dips of molly and we’re good. i got to the middle of the crowd where there was a good amount of room to dance and move around, and borgore says “ i better see a mosh pit for this song” ok first of all we’re on a hill second of all this isn’t a heavy metal concert. everyone looks at him like hes retarded. i talk to the kid next to me. “fuck that dude” he was like “yeah fuck that” i like this guy. were on the same page. i give him a dip of molly. he’s pumped. “Thanks dude” “yeah no problem i got you.” so we chill for the rest of borgore. after borgore i just wandered around rolling balls going wherever the music took me. i dont remember who else i saw that night but i had a blast. this year i stayed out until the festival closed. unlike last year when i went back to camp once i came down from my roll. i went and checked out the spirithood booth. to say hello to them because ive never actually met them I've only talked to them through email with the brand ambassador program. so i talked to them for a while i told them who i was and how i was an ambassador for them. we made small talk for a minute and they were like “oh we just talked to another ambassador, she was just here a second ago. she had a black wolf hood on” so i went and met up with the other ambassador. she was really cool. i dont remember her name though. but we sat in the grass and talked for a few minutes. then she went to catch up with her friends. the festival was coming to a close so i went back to camp. Day 2, friday. we woke up early as fuck again cause it was so hot, 7:00am or 8:00am. we wake up and spark a joint our typical routine. Jeff wakes up and everyone asks Jeff how his first night was. barely awake doesnt even have his glasses on yet, he smiles “fuckin awesome” i was like “yeah Jeff i saw you running around like you in wonder land.” “i was in wonder land” Jeff is a fan of molly. the rest of the day we pretty much just chilled at the camp smoking and taking naps cause we were tired. we talked all about our first night. it was everyones first electric forest except for the crew and i that went last year. everyone loved it. they loved walking through the forest all lit up at night with the hammocks and different pieces of art. clouds start rolling in and it looks like its going to storm. im nervous and happy at the same time. im nervous because i dont like thunderstorms and my experience last year was not great. but im happy becasue i would rather it rain during the day when nothing is going on than at night. it ended up raining for like 2 minutes but you bet your ass i was in the tent, hiding, smoking a joint.
Trevor's laughing “you do not like thunderstorms.” i was like “no, no i dont” the rain ended then Ian and Sam joined me in the tent to smoke a joint. i like smoking in the tent. its like a fort. it got a little warm but the rain cooled it down a bit. The festival gates opened at like 4 i think. we went and checked out Das Racist at 6 i believe. we were just laying in the grass my friends were smoking opium. i wasnt because the only drug i use is molly because “its not addictive.” so i was just chillin with my friends, and Jane, my first “fan” comes running over. “what up panda!?” “oh sup Jane!” she chills with us and joins in on the opium fun. we talk and chill watching das racist for probably an hour or so. it was nice seeing her again i haven't seen her in a while. she said she doesnt go to shows to much anymore because they’re all at that new Bright City club with a bunch of bros. like i said “bros are the anti christ of the rave scene.” a die hard raver who drove to Tennessee to see bassnectar is not going to shows anymore because of the bros. After das racist ended i went over to the ranch area, and saw ghostland observatory. they’re a band. i hate live instruments. here a perfect example of why. im with Drake and were right in the front and we ended up finding Greg and Kent. they had a giant lion friend finder. some people call them totems, i call them friend finders. a lot of people have them at festivals its actually really cool. but we found Greg and Kent, Drake hasnt seen them in a while because of his abstinence. so they were really excited to see eachother. Ghostland Observatory finally goes on and we can hear every instrument but not the vocals. everyone is yelling “turn it up!” this is why i hate live instruments, something always goes wrong, whether it be over powering instruments or just bad in general live, something always goes wrong, with my experience. the beat was pretty cool though but i wanted to hear the vocals. after about 15 minutes Greg and Kent decide they’re going to go somewhere else. about 5 minutes after that Drake leaves. then i leave. fuck this. well it turns out pretty much right after we left Ian showed up and everything was fine. fuck you Ian! i just wandered around enjoying myself until dada life came on. dada life was playing at tripolee. originally dada life and bassnectar were scheduled to play at the same time. this did not go over well. everyone was pissed. luckily they changed it for bassnectar to play sunday though. so im chillin at the tripolee stage. the tripolee stage is right by the gates when you walk in, you cant miss it. dada life comes on. im sober for this show. not sure why, but i was having more fun giving out dips than dipping myself. free dips for everyone! im walking around through the crowd giving out dips. who do i see? the guys we saw on the highway when we saw dada life back in march. holy shit. i slap him on the shoulder “Sup dude!” he turns and looks at me closes his eyes and opens them real wide “woah! its you!” i hold out my bag “have a dip bro.” “hell yeah, thanks dude. hey guys check it out its this kid.” he points at me over his shoulder. this is crazy what a small world. dada life plays their remix of the big bad wolf and everyone starts howling “hooooooooowwwwwlllllll!” i tell these guys “peace out.” and continue wandering. this time someone slaps me on the shoulder. i turn around “oh fuck!” its Amy, Ian, Dawn,
and Alex.” so once again the most magical feeling in the world is finding your friends. so i chill with them and we’re all howling at the moon. having a blast. we’re pretty close to the front and they start spraying champagne everywhere. i was not about to get wet so i crouched down until they were done. im not about to get all sticky and wet from champagne fuck that. this hat was expensive. they finish spraying the crowd with champagne and then they throw giant blow up bananas and monkeys into the crowd. i got to hit one, success! After dada life was major lazer. major lazer has a hype man. hype men are annoying as fuck. all they do is yell on the mic “jump!” or in major lazers case “girls lets see those shirts in the air!” annoying as hell. they were closing out the night though and i was kind of tired so i said fuck it and went back to camp. i was the first one back at camp. it was pretty quiet, kinda eery. but you could hear other camps partying still. i could have went over and made small talk but i wanted to sit down. so i sat down in a chair. shortly after i sat down Amy and Alex showed up. “sup guys” they both say “ugh fuckin major lazer and their annoying ass hype man. i like theyre music but cant stand their hype man” i was like “i feel you guys on that one i cant stand that guy. i really want to see just Diplo” they agreed Diplo by himself would be dope. Jeff shows up “what up guys?” we all go “how was it Jeff?” “fuckin amazing” Jeff informs us. wolfgang gartner was still his favorite though. he was diggin wolfgang. and i dont blame him wolfgang killed it. and for a first experience wolfgang was a good one. i don think it was quite as great as my tiesto but it was still great. everyone else shows up and we’re all talking about our night over a blunt. Ethan shows up last and gives us a buzz kill. we’re all smoking a blunt most of us still rolling a little bit and Ethan throws at us “you guys hear about the guy that died?” really dude? you’re bringing this up now? i guess there was a guy that showed up by himself, he was neighbors with Ethans friends and he offered them all these drugs that they have never even heard of. they told him no thanks were good. he ended up taking a nap in his car with a blanket during the day and over heated i guess. that’d kind of tweak you out as a neighbor. that would be more of a buzz kill than the story, obviously. could you imagine that, watching the medical team taking this guy out of his car on a stretcher? and hes dead. its like 4 or 5 in the morning and the blunts out. im about to hit the hay and call it a night. i was the first to go to sleep. i change my shirt cause its all wet from sweating. i snug in my blankets cause im freezing cold. not from the molly this time. i stayed sober this night. but when your shirt is all wet and we’re in michigan so even though its summer the nights can still get a little chilly especially if you’re wet. so i go to sleep on my deflated air mattress. its extremely uncomfortable so i lay one of my blankets down underneath me. not great, but better. sweet dreams Day 3, saturday. i wake up from the blistering heat around 9:00am a little later this morning because we were tired as fuck. fuck the heat im sleeping still. i get out of my tent and Jay is awake already. “morning Jay” “sup Steve” (my name is Steve, i dont think ive addressed that yet.) i sit in a chair and rest my head on my hand cause im tired
as fuck. i dont even want to sit in the chair. i lay on the ground. this is much better. i pass out. i wake up and its probably noonish. im not really sure my phone was off to save battery incase of an emergency. everyones awake now except Sam. Sam tends to sleep the longest. i dont know how he does it in the blistering heat but hey he can do it and im a little jealous. i sit up and hit the blunt. at festivals blunts and joints tend to be in rotation at all times. its part of the camping life. for us at least. i didnt do much during the day just laid around and slept. i was exhausted. Steve Aoki is playing tonight. im trying to see him. i turn my phone on and check the app on my phone and it says he's playing at the sherwood court stage. at 2am i believe. but on the schedule they passed out at the gates it said he was playing at tripolee. we’re all trying to figure this out, all day. we finally figure out he was playing at tripolee because thats where all the other dim mak artists were playing. dim mak is Steve Aokis record label. so dusk rolls around and i head to the festival, tripolee is literally right there when you walk through the gates. so i didnt have to go far. first guy i saw was felix cartal. the guy that was playing at the Bright City club a few weeks ago but we were waiting until the forest to see, thats this guy. i was with Drake. i was diggin this guy, i really liked his set. Drake wasn't feeling it he said every drop was the same. i liked the drop so this didn't bother me. but i understand how he feels because of my experience with laidback luke. after felix was datsik, same stage. we were at the tripolee stage all night. i went and sat down in the grass for a while. im not a huge datsik fan. this guy comes up to me and we start talking. we talk for like 3 hours. he was from canada and drove 8 hours by himself to meet his friends. “here have a dip” “thanks dude” he was telling me about all the different festivals that he has been to. he said electric forest was one of his favorites but he was telling me about this one in canada. i dont remember what it was called. but he said it was the greatest festival hes been to and hes been to some of the biggest festivals like Electric Daisy Carnival (EDC) and ultra. those are 2 of the biggest dance festivals in the world, and are the 2 biggest in the country. we talk about dance music for like 3 hours. i like this guy. i could talk about dance music all day. we talk about some of our favorite artists. our favorite songs. this guy is great. i never got his name though. but thats whats magical about the forest. this complete stranger comes and sits next to me. 3 hours later were still talking. its amazing. we kept taking dips while we were talking, we’re having a blast. rolling balls talking about our favorite thing in the world, dance music. this guy has been in the scene a lot longer than i have but we both have a great understanding of what this scene is about. we end up talking about deadmau5. i told him my experience with deadmau5. i told him honestly i wasnt a big fan of deadmau5s music but i wanted to see his mau5head on stage. so i went. and i had a blast. i told him after that i decided you cant judge a DJ until you've seen them live. he says “exactly” live and on record are completely different. we agree. we agree on a lot of stuff.
datisk ends and zeds dead is up next. i tell this guy “ugh ive seen zeds dead like 4 times in the past year and a half, i’m kind of sick of zeds dead.” he shrugged his shoulders “eh i don’t mind zeds dead” i didn't mind them the first few times i saw them but anymore its like ok ive had enough of this. he understands. we continue talking through zeds dead. we talk about the forest and how amazing it is and how much time they must have put into it. every tree was lit up, and every art display was very unique. and there wasn't a single bug. we just realize this and are amazed. “youre right, there are no bugs!” we converse about how they may have went about killing all the bugs. we never make it to a conclusion. “another dip?” “hell yeah thanks dude.” zeds dead finally ends and Steve Aoki is up next. a lot of people are waiting for him at sherwood court. they’re pissed. they realize hes at tripolee and they sprint literally across the entire festival to tripolee. “alright dude im about to go up there for Steve Aoki, it was nice talking to you and if i dont see you enjoy the rest of your festival and get home safe.” “will do, you too.” “one last dip? make it a big one” “fuck yeah thanks dude.” im rolling pretty hard now so i pull a Jeff and sprint to the crowd. i start jumping and spining in circles like a figure skater. im feelin good. i get into the crowd and im goin hard as fuck. i really like Steve Aoki and i was pumped to see what crazy shit he had in store for us this time around. the music was dope but his stage presence, i was a little disappointed he didnt stage dive once. i thought for sure he was going to do something crazy but he didnt. whatever it was still a great time. my friend Trevor and his girlfriend Gail waited at this stage all day to get front row. Gail wanted to get caked. getting caked is this new thing he does where he throws a cake at your face. honestly id be pissed if he threw a cake at me. more pissed than the champagne. but Gail wanted to get caked. hes got his cake in hand lookin throughout the crowd. who do i throw this at? Gail is cheering “me! me!” and the girl next to her gets caked. so close! she got some cake on her but it wasn't to the face it was on the shoulder. i saw one girl in the crowd she had a sign that said “its my birthday take me raver rafting” so he pointed at her and brought her on stage and she jumped in the raft. it was so sick! i wanted to ride in that raft. i never got to, but dam did i want to. fuck the cake put me in the raft! Steve Aoki drops an unreleased track that was a collaboration with him and knife party. this song went hard as fuck. im lovin this song. im jumping and doing whatever the fuck dance moves i was doing like no tomorrow. ive noticed a lot of my dance moves originate from the Macarena. Steve Aokis set ends, im still rolling pretty hard. but the night is over so i head back to camp. this was my third time seeing him and i loved it. but was also disappointed at the same time. i loved the music. that knife party collaboration was crazy. but i was disappointed with his stage performance. he had a lot of energy but he didn’t do any crazy stage dives which he is pretty much known for. i was expecting something crazy since it was a festival and he was closing out the night. but whatever ill still see him again. we get back to camp and were starting to come down. someone rolls up a blunt and the rotation begins. we’re all talking about our night and Gail is pumped and
bummed at the same time. they waited at that stage all night to try and get caked and she got so close! but she still had a blast. but if she was one more foot to the left. boom cake to the face. but why you would want to be caked at a 4 day camping festival where there are no showers is beyond me. but i didnt ask. that blunt knocks me out and i hit the hay. “night guys” Day 4, sunday. the final day of electric forest 2012. we’re all exhausted and want to sleep in our own beds but don’t want to go home. all day we’re trying to figure out whether we want to leave tonight or leave in the morning. everyone has different opinions. but everyone ends up wanting to go home except for Gail and Trevor i believe. so we pack up all our shit before we head into the festival. taking down camp on the last day when you’re dead tired sucks, and its depressing because you know the weekend is over and you have to go back to participating in real life. this day sucked for me. i got sick. i was fine most of the day. but when dusk hit i started feeling nausea so i saw the beginning of Richie Hawtin then i headed back to camp. i had about a half gram of molly left. i didnt want to bring it home so i go up to this guy and gave him a half gram for free. “here.” he was like “seriously?” “yeah i dont want to bring it home with me.” “fuck yeah thanks dude!” and he runs to his camp site “Guys guess what i just got!?” im glad hes happy. i make it back to camp and everything is taken down except one chair and a blanket. i use both and try and fall a sleep. i couldnt do it. so i ended up just sitting there for like 3 or 4 hours. until the rest of the crew got back. i ended up missing bassnectar which i was kind of bummed about. but he didnt even close the festival big gigantic did. i thought bassnectar should have, but whatever. big gigantic actually ended up playing a 5 hour set and played until 5am. luckily none of my crew went to big gigantic. so they get back to camp around 12:30am - 1:00am all our shits pack we’re ready to go. the car doesnt start. fuck. are you serious? the battery somehow died. we have no jumper cables and everyone is still at the festival. so we have to wander around trying to find anyone at their camp that can help us out. luckily we found someone within like 15 minutes. awesome. im not feeling well, im not in the mood for this shit. we get the car started fairly quickly and were off. i fall asleep immediately and wake up when we’re almost home. lucky me. we get back to Sam’s house and we’re like fuck it we’ll unpack in the morning. good idea. i go home. i go to bed immediately and the strangest thing happened. i was laying in bed listening to my ipod trying to fall asleep. and every 10 to 15 second i hear a whoomp sound. im like “the fuck was that?” then i hear it a few more times. “alright, the fuck is going on right now? i end up getting convinced aliens are trying to communicate with me and i rip my headphones out terrified. i start breathing heavily. the fuck was that? i didnt even take any drugs today/night. so i lay back down without my headphones. i roll over and i think/ feel like im hovering next to my bed. i freak the fuck out and go to rollover but im against the wall. now im really like what the fuck is going on right now!? now im scared to fall a sleep. i have never experienced something like this
before. i ended up falling a sleep and i woke up in the morning so we were fine. but it was the strangest thing. weird. 23. i wake up at like 3:00pm. “hi mom.” “so how was it?” crazy as fuck i actually stayed out the whole night this time so it was ridiculously crazy. i had a blast. i tell her about Jeff, and how much fun Jeff had. shes happy for him. she asks me where my stuff is. i told her i was about to go get it from Sam’s. we got home at like 5 in the morning and the last thing we wanted to do was unpack. so i headed to Sams and got my stuff. wasn't a lot. a couple of blankets. a duffle bag. i left my deflated air mattress at the forest becasue i couldnt roll it up small enough to fit in the car and got frustrated so i said fuck this shit and kicked it on the ground. i felt much better. the next few days are recovery days because i’m exhausted. a lot of laying around listening to music and thinking of memories past. still thinking about what happened to me that night when i got home. i didnt tell my mom about it. i didnt want her getting suspicious of drug use. so she didn't need to know about my alien encounter. i told Drake and Sam about it though. they had no idea, they thought it was crazy too. 24. the next show was a few weeks away it was a triple header. it was above and beyond with wolfgang gartner, followed by knife party, followed by identity fest. i was still tired from forest and didn't want to be tired for identity fest so i didn't go to the first 2 shows. i should have though because none of them came back within the next year. identity fest rolls around. its at a different venue this year. which is good because there were no seats this time. this time i knew just about everyone on the lineup. i ended up going with Nate. we get there the line is pretty long. but luckily for us we see Jane pretty close to the front. she calls us over, fuck yeah. so we cut with Jane and chit chat for a minute while were in line. we talk about the forest because it was crazy and it just ended. she went off about bassnectar. she loves bassnectar. i told her how i missed him becausse i got sick, i was pissed. she told me thats unfortunate because he killed it, like always. we get to the front of the line. “what up panda man?” the security guard recognized me. awesome. he searches our camel baks to make sure they’re empty. if you're going to a festival bring a camel bak. its a backpack that holds water and has a straw you can drink out of. extremely convenient. we get into the festival and us and Jane part ways. “catch you later guys” “later Jane” theres 2 stages theres one inside of the new EDM club Bright City and theres one outside in the parking lot. we wander on inside and who do we run into? le castle vania. we talk to him for a second shake it hand and hes off. he leaves and we both look at eachother “Fuck!” we should have gotten a picture. oh well. nothing we can do about it now. inside we catch a duo called dvvbs whatever that means i have no idea. but they have a hype man. “ugh.” hes not nearly as annoying as major lazers though. it was at least tolerable major lazers hype man makes you want to leave. its still not to packed, the festival just started but its an all ages event so someone taps me on the shoulder and its the 16 year old. im pumped, i turn around “what up dude!” i introduce him to
Nate. they make small talk for a minute then the 16 year old is off to find his friends. i love seeing the 16 year old at shows. hes actually proabably 17 now cause i havnt seen him since november at zeds dead. but im always going to call him the 16 year old. it gives him character. after dvvbs inside is le castle vania. its starting to get pretty packed wich is sweet cause i everytime ive seen him it was a real personal show. ive always wanted to see him in a packed crowd. he gets on stage and destroys it. there was a mosh pit. im pissed. i hate mosh pits but it pushes me all the way up to the front, cool. im dancing having a blast to le castle vania and he has just as much if not more energy than he has had at every other show. the crowd is going crazy, i’m happy for him. one of my favorite things he does is when he drops daft punks “around the world” he gets on the DJ table and puts his headphones over his eyes like he’s thomas from daft punk. daft punk are like the gods of electronic music, they havnt toured in years but every raver would kill to see them live. i know i already told myself if they tour ill drop $500 on tickets without hesitation. i don’t care where there playing. at the end of le castle vania’s set he says his thank you’s and goodbyes and that he’ll be doing a meet and greet by the merch booth. i find Nate “lets go!” we had a second chance at our picture. and we got it. as we were walking to the merch booth we ran into Drake and Ian. they just got here because they had to work. we went to the merch booth and were like the second ones there. we got our picture. Nate went with Drake and Ian to the outside stage i went back inside because i wanted to see madeon. madeon was only 17. he technically wasn’t even allowed in the club he was playing at. how cool is that? madeon was sweet. nothing crazy but he was only 17 so i thought it was cool as fuck. i dont know why i just thought it was so cool how young he was. after madeon was excision. he was on the outside stage, the rockstar stage i beleive it was called. excision had just gotten new 100,000 watt amplifiers. so this shit was loud as fuck. talk about feeling the bass. i catch up with all my friends and we’re to the left of the stage probably 20 feet away from one of the speakers. he goes on and we’re so close to the speakers we can feel our hair blowing in the wind from the speakers. this shit was loud you can feel it throughout your entire body. it didnt hurt my ears though surprisingly. his stage set up was pretty cool it was like a giant X but honestly i wasnt paying much attention to the stage set up cause this bass was ridiculous. i eventually had to take a step back because i felt like i was going to throw up from the bass pounding on my chest. i wasn’t complaining though. i walk back to about the middle of the crowd. i lean to the person next to me “i had to step back i felt like i was going to throw up from all the bass, how dope is that?” “yeah same here dude, this is fuckin crazy. i actually bought ear plugs from that booth right over there.” he points to the booth. excision comes to an end and has everyone talking. not only did he destroy the dance floor but no one has experienced bass of these proportions before. your walking through the crowd and all you hear is people saying “that bass.” “you could feel it
through your entire body” “it kinda hurt my ears” “i almost threw up.” hey so it wasn’t just me that needed to step back. after excision i go inside to catch Eric Prydz who was closing out that stage. i wanted to see Eric because he doesn’t come to America that often because i guess he’s not a huge fan of planes. so i check him out for about 15 - 20 mins. honestly im not feelin it. so i go back outside with my friends and catch nero. nero is different from nervo. i wish it was nervo. but its nero. nero is killin it. i go catch back up with my friends. they’re still to the left side near the speakers. “what up guys?” “oh hey you’re back.” “im back.” im diggin nero a lot more than i was Eric prydz. nero closes out the festival and identity fest was a success. if you went to identity fest there was a free after party at the Bright City club where the festival took place, with cedric gervais. Nate and i were tired we’ve been dancing since 2:00pm its now 11:00pm so we decide to pass and go home. we get in to the car and the parking lot is a gridlock. were sitting there for 10 minutes and decide fuck it want to just go to the after party? were not leaving here anytime soon. so we decide to go to the after party. we weren’t there long. i left my gps on and plugged into my car and i asked Nate “dude i left my gps on and plugged in, do you think it will drain my battery?” “i honestly dont know.” “fuck it lets not risk it.” “good idea” we get back to the parking lot and there wasn’t a car around. we were inside 10 minutes and the gridlock that we thought was going nowhere had vanished. hmph perfect. we leave. great day/night. 25. Work. 9:00am pushing the carts. theres no one here its early so im basically just walking back and forth across the parking lot. im fine with this. we get a new guy today. Hes my age. his name is Craig. real cool guy, i like Craig a lot. we become good friends. we are at new walmart so were pretty slow. so Craig and i just dick around in the parking lot all day bullshitting and talking. Craig’s really into technology and the new iphone 5 was coming out soon so this was a topic of conversation Craig enjoyed. he convinced me to get the new iphone. he talks about all of these cool features and what it can do. i was do for a new upgrade so fuck it i got the new iphone. this plays a big factor in my life and party career. i get this new iphone and im looking through the apps and there is a stock app. i start watching it not knowing anything about it besides prices go up and prices go down. i talk to Craig at work about the stocks hes mildly interested as well. we start watching the walmart stock. we work for walmart so it seemed fit. Craig and i continue to dick around in the parking lot talking about any and everything continuing to watch our walmart stock “oh did you see it went up today?” a few days go by and i tell Craig “dude i might start investing in stocks. think about it how much more fun would it be if we were watching these stocks but making money at the same time.” he agreed that would be dope. i talk to my dad and he talks to his broker to see if he could get me in on the stock game. i meet with my dads broker and theres a giant 60 inch screen tv in his office with a bunch of charts and numbers. im in love, i think this is the coolest thing in the world. i
end up talking to him for about an hour and a half if not 2 hours. i end up buying a mutual fund. a mutual fund is basically a group of stocks/companies rather than 1 stock or company. i immediately start following these mutual funds on my stock app. i go to work the next day but Craig wasn’t working, it was just me today. fuck. i want to tell him about my investing. the day drags on but does eventually end. im checking my stocks like every 10-15 minutes. im more focused on my stocks than i am work or anything else. im off the next day but Craig works. you’ve gotta be kidding me. finally Craig and i work together again. i tell Craig all about my stocks and hes excited for me. all i want to talk about are these stocks. i know nothing about them but god dammit i want to talk about them. Craig and i talk like we know what were talking about, but we have no idea. days go by and Craig and i are now good friends. we learn each others schedules so we no longer have to hope and pray we’re working together. we will know a head of time. quinitn was taking classes on tuesdays and thursdays so those were his days off. my days off were usually fridays and sundays. so we worked together mondays, wednesdays, and saturdays. the days i didnt work with Craig sucked. they dragged on forever and just weren’t enjoying. i like to enjoy myself. so i liked working with Craig. working with Craig wasnt even work we just hung out in the parking lot and dicked around. all the managers were busy inside, they may have checked on us once a day. but we always had the lot clear of carts so they didn’t really care to much. i eventually said fuck not working with Craig. so i told my manager i got a second job and that i worked at my second job tuesdays and thursdays and that i needed to change my hours of availability. Craig and i are now on the same schedule. we both have tuesdays and thursdays off so every time we worked it was with each other. i love work now. i look forward to work. it was almost therapeutical. we talked about everything good bad or otherwise. we complained about our boss, we talked about the news, we checked out hot girls that came into the store. life is good. 26. Kaskades “Freaks of Nature” tour comes to town, august 4th. one of my favorite quotes is from kaskade about his freaks of nature tour. “we’re all really different people, whatever, lets just come here an have a party.” that there is the definition of the rave scene. kaskade understands. Drake loves kaskade so he came out tonight. Hes playing at The Mill. when we saw avicii at this venue back in january he went on at 11, during the school year, on a thursday. so we assumed kaskade would go on around the same time, if not later since it was a saturday during the summer. we were wrong. we get there around 10:00pm and theres a very short line. we sneak in our molly very easily. i run to the bathroom and get a water. then were off to the dance floor. walking down to the dance floor i notice the lights are very bright and the music is very loud. i ask someone “who is this?” he looks at my like im retarded “kaskade” what!? kaskade is on already?? i pop my molly immediately and run to the dance floor. i had a surprise for this show. i had custom balloons made that said “Detroit Panda Man” everyone likes hitting the balloons and
what better way to get your name out there than having a bunch of balloons floating around with your name on them? marketing. This was the best idea i have ever had marketing wise. now everyone in the entire crowd sees my name. Drake reads them and laughs, he helps me blow them up. im watching the balloons float around and one of kaskades lasers popped the balloon. okay im not even mad because that was awesome. the molly kicks in around 10:20 ok enough with blowing up balloons lets dance. ive got some ground to make up since we missed the beginning of his set, so im going hard as fuck. im having a blast, i can feel my peak coming up. im in heaven, smiles dancing, nothing but love. i run into this one guy, i never got his name but ive seen him before. we have a bro hug and he dances with us. 11:00pm “thank you guys, you were amazing!” “thank you guys? the fuck you mean thank you guys?” im thinking no way can this be over i just started peaking.the lights come on, fuck. everyone starts leaving i look at Drake “dude, the fuck? im peaking” “yeah me too” we’re standing there trying to figure out what we’re going to do. “oh what up guys!?” its Kent and Greg. we’re ecstatic to see them. we inform them that we are peaking and dont know what to do. so we hung out with them for a bit until security kicked us out. we talked about how lame it was that it ended so early. Greg and Kent were like “yeah he went on at 9:30pm” i was like really? we were still at the house at that time. lame. kaskade was a blast for what we saw of him. wish we would have known what time he was going on but whatever. i have yet to successfully see kaskade. the first time i saw him at identity fest in 2011 there were seats and for some reason don't remember it very well. and the second time we only saw the last half hour of his set. so we end up just driving around detroit for a few hours listening to music waiting for our roll to die down. we still had a blast. you cant not have a good time when you're rolling, it just doesn't happen. 27. Our next show was claude von stroke. it was a free show in some park in detroit. Drake and Sam were in greece so it was just Ian and i. we get there and the line is around the corner. it was free so anyone and everyone is here. we wait in line for a while we almost get to the front. and they stop letting people in. sorry its full as people leave we will let more in. fuckin dammit. we’re literally like 4 people away from the front of the line. no ones leaving, why would they? everyone in line is pissed. so everyones like fuck you and starts climbing the fence. i wasnt going to climb the fence i was like no, no im almost in the front ill just wait. then i said fuck it and climbed the fence. i felt like a bad ass, james bond 007. i run into James. ive seen James at a few shows before. he finds me and introduces me to his friends “this is the detroit panda man, i see him at every fuckin show i go to!” i smile “sup guys” i feel pretty cool at this point. people are introducing me to their friends as the detroit panda man, dope. i blow up a bunch of balloons and other people start asking if they can blow some up. of course you can. theres now like 15 balloons in the air with my name on them. i feel like a boss.
Stacy, the girl from DEMF and Shazzzam, finds me, and runs up to me “Steeeeeve! i saw your balloons, those are the coolest things ever!” i laugh “thank you, how have you been? we talk and groove for a while. i tell her about how we had to climb the fence to get in and she thinks thats awesome. i once again feel like a bad ass. claude von stroke was a success it was a lot of fun. Ian and i say our good byes and were out. now were at roughly 1,100 “likes” 28. i find out about the group krewella. i randomly found them on youtube. i need to see these guys. they were coming to the NightLife club in october. i hit up my friends and they decide they’re gonna go to shows less often and save up their money for festivals in the summer. fuck, my crew is out. i like festivals but i like shows more. festivals are exhausting and im not a huge fan of camping, or driving far distances. i end up missing krewella because i didnt want to go by myself. i dont know what to do now. zedd (not to get confused with zeds dead) was coming up. i needed to see zedd. but my crew is out. so i went by myself. i was thought to myself the past 2 or 3 months every show ive gone to someone has recognized me, im sure ill see someone there i know. zedd was on my dads birthday. i left dads birthday dinner a little early to catch the show. dad was fine with this all his friends were there and no one was really talking to me anyways, and dads really proud of this whole panda man thing. he thinks its the coolest thing in the world, and it actually means a lot to me. my dads really supportive with everything i do no matter what, i really appreciate that. So im off to zedd, it was at Bright City. this was my first time going to a show by myself. i was a little nervous to be honest. i get in line “sup panda” that was quick. it was James. i ended up hanging out with James most of the night. he asked me for my number. a few people before have asked me for my number but i never wanted to give it out. but i gave it to James. i liked James i see him all the time and considered him a friend. zedd kills it. this is when clarity just came out so no one was sick of it yet and it was amazing. zedd threw the fuck down. there was a confetti drop, i love confetti drops. i was blowing up my balloons and James was like “give me some of those” so he helped me blow them up. i love watching the balloons float in the air and watching everyone trying to hit them. but there was always that one bro that caught the balloons and popped them. god dammit those balloons were expensive. but whatever cant do anything about it now. zedd drops clarity and the whole crowd sings a long. i really like this song, along with just about everyone else. zedd comes to a close and going to my first show alone was a success. i actually kind of like it better becasue i can wander around and meet new people where with a group you feel kind of confined to that group. so i like going alone. i can show up and leave whenever i want. next show is a halloween party called freaky deaky. its at the Bright City where i just saw zedd. its krewella and zeds dead. ok ive seen zeds dead like 6 times now, so im mostly pumped about krewella. i didnt wear a crazy costume i just threw on a cape. i liked my cape, i felt like a super hero.
i get to the club and the line is pretty long. everyone is dressed up in costumes, its really cool. its the end of october now so its starting to get a little chilly when you wait in line. but we finally get inside, it took about a half hour. we’re inside and ready to party. my knee hurts though. i dont know why so im a little bummed. but i stuck in there. i ended up seeing my cousin, well second cousin, Billy there. we saw each other “oh, what up dude” i didnt know he was in the scene. we make small talk for a minute and go our separate ways. we dont really know eachother to well, we see each other like once a year at the family reunion and it was just a hello type of deal. but i actually become good friends with him. krewella goes on around 11. im sober and my knee hurts. so im trying to dance but its difficult. so i do more standing and watching. im really digging the music and wish my knee didnt hurt. krewella is a guy and two girls. the girls are sisters. before seeing them live i originally thought the guy did most of the mixing and the girls did the singing. but to my surprise the girls actually did a lot of the mixing. props to them. after krewella ended zeds dead comes on. honestly im sick of zeds dead, i dont even like they’re music all that much, and my knee hurts. so i leave limping. tonight sucked. it would have been great but because of my knee it was terrible. i don't even know what i did to it, it only hurt that day the next day it was fine. 29. Our next show was bassnectar at The Mill, where we saw avicii and kaskade. the whole crew goes to this show, fuck yeah. its been a while since the whole crew went to a show together. its Drake, Sam, Ian, Collin, and i. im feeling a little risky tonight so im taking .3 molly this time. usually i only take .2. so im excited cause i know im about to roll hard as fuck. but im a little nervous though cause ive never taken this much before and think i could possibly overdose. (.3 becomes a joke. no way was i about to overdose) im looking at this cap and theres a lot of molly in it. im starting to think maybe i shouldn’t. but as we’re walking up to the venue i say fuck it and pop my molly. this way i dont have to sneak it through security. we get in there and bassnectar goes on minutes after we get in, perfect. im waiting for the molly to kick in so i blow up my balloons. this is Sam’s first time seeing the balloons and he’s amazed. each of my friends want to blow up some balloons. so now theres like 7 or 8 balloons flying through the air. like usual i feel like a boss. the molly hits me, and it hits me hard. im swaying my head back and forth, i have long hair so my hair brushing against my face feels utterly amazing. ive never rolled this had before, and im having a blast. i dont stop dancing for a second, not one. we’re more towards the back of the crowd. this is where i like to be because theres more room to dance and its not as hot. bassnectar is killing it and before i know it its over. holy shit. i had a blast. i cant stop thinking or talking about how much fun i had. my friends all had a blast too. they only took .2 molly but they were feeling it. The next day i go on facebook and check out my panda page were now at around 1,200 “likes” Jane posted it on it “i saw your balloons but couldn't find you.” another girl posted a photo of her holding one of my balloons. i smile like fuck yeah. i
think this is the coolest picture in the world. so i saved it to my computer and started a facebook photo album titled “balloons” and encouraged more people to send me pictures of them with the balloons. around this time, its early november. skrillex announces he's having a new years eve party in detroit. I about shit my pants. ive always wanted to go to a new years eve party. honestly i wasnt a huge fan of skrillex though. but fuck it, it was new years i bought tickets the second they went on sale. dropped $150 on a ticket for a DJ i didn’t even like that much, no fucks given. i was going to go by myself i didnt care. i was going to this new years eve party. but my mom for christmas bought me another ticket so i could take a friend. thanks mom. i asked Nate if we wanted to go, i havnt been to a show with him in a while cause he’s always working. Nate needed to have some fun. he worked at little Caesars at the time. he totally wanted to go but he said no one was allowed to request that day off since it was a busy holiday for them. instead the boss drew names out of a hat and if your name got called you could have the day off. well lucky for us Nates name gets drawn. fuck yeah, he txts me saying he can go. im excited, and hes excited. new years is finally here. skrillex here we come. i bring a .4 bag of molly with me. it was in a powder so i was going to be taking dips all night. which was better because it went until 4:00am. so i could extend my roll by taking dips rather than coming down before 4:00am. we get there early and no ones there, sweet no line, and security was easy as fuck. Nate was getting a little nervous cause police officers were patrolling around inside. i wasn't overly worried about it. we weren't doing anything wrong we just had drugs on us, but they didn’t know that. We meet up with this girl Emily and her friend Andy. i never met him before but he knew who i was through the whole panda man thing. we hung out with them all night. they were cool. flosstradamus and boys noize opened for skrillex. during flosstradamus we were walking around just scoping out the venue. i wish we would have saw them but no big deal. we didn’t go down to the main floor until boys noize went on. on our way down there i see Tron. i havnt seen him in a while so i had to say hi. he was pumped to see me, i was pumped to see him. so we make it down to main floor and there weren’t a lot of people down there, i mean tickets were $150 so i can see why. but we chilled in the back the entire time where we had more than enough room. i start taking dips along with Nate. we’re feeling good. boys noize goes on and his stage set up is dope hes playing on top of this giant skull with light up red eyes. it was sweet. i couldn't wait to see skrillexs stage set up though. (I assumed skrillex would go on at midnight since it was new years eve.) boys noize killed it though i never really listened to boys noize before but i really enjoyed his set. boys noize is over and theres a countdown on the screen to midnight. i was right skrillex was going on at midnight. so i take a few more dips and im feelin great. im rolling harder than i was at bassnectar. Nate ran out of molly and was like “fuck! i wanna be on your level right now.” so i gave him a dip. sharing is caring.
while we were waiting for the countdown i blew up some balloons and this kid Mitch comes up to me. we make small talk then he’s off. we later become good friends. the countdown is down to a minute so i quickly finish the rest of my molly. i suck on my finger to get the powder off, pucker my face cause it taste so bad, then were good. i let Nate lick the rest of the bag. im jumping up and down pumped for skrillex, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2 1. the lights flash and theres a confetti drop. i throw my hands in the air like fuck yes bring on the music. skrillex throws the fuck down. after 2 songs i decided skrillex is my boy and he becomes one of my favoirtes. like i said before don't judge a DJ until you’ve seen them live. im fucked out of my mind spinning and jumping like a figure skater again. im in love. i love life. i love my friend Nate. i love skrillex. i love everything. skrillexs stage was called the mother ship. it looked like a giant star wars space ship. it was really cool. the visuals were crazy too. during one of the songs on the screen was a call of duty montage. it so sick. sooo sick. Nate and i were into Call of Duty at this time so we thought it was was so cool, were laughing just having a blast. i look at the ground and start swaying my head back and forth so my hair brushes against my face again. i stop and look up skrillex is gone. where did he go? he’s 20 feet in the air now. my jaw drops, i am so amazed this is ridiculous, i fuckin love skrillex, i fuckin love new years. i fuckin love life. my $150 was 100% worth it. skrillex ends around 2:00am. there were 2 after parties. one upstairs and one downstairs the one downstairs was $20 the one downstairs was free. Nate didnt have any money so we went to the free one upstairs. huge mistake. it was bumpin but later we find out the one one downstairs was dog blood. which is skrillex and boys noize back to back.(back to back basically just means they play together) fuck, had i known that i would have bought Nate his ticket. but whatever. we went to the upstairs one. around 3:00am we both start coming down so we decide to leave. we had a great night im glad Nate was able to come. and Nate was just as happy and thankful for the ticket. 30. Work, its now january. Craig puts his two weeks in at work because he’s going back to school. im bummed, work is going to suck with out him. so we make the last 2 weeks worth it. im now obsessing over the stock market trying to learn as much as possible. im learning to read charts and the stock market vocabulary. i talk to Craig all about this. i ended up finding classes online about how to trade in the markets. hell yeah. i go to this seminar on the stock market class. and i love every second of it. the instructors were talking about why they trade in the stock market. “its the freedom life style, i can work from home, i can go on vacation when i want, i can sleep in when i want, im my own boss.” this is Rick talking to the class. he adds “i sit at the computer for 3 hours a day, 4 days a week, i dont work in fridays, and avergae $800 a day.” $800 a day, thats right up my alley. I'm all for making $800 a day. i sign up for the class. Craigs 2 weeks come to an end. hes gone. i say my goodbyes, but we keep in touch. work sucks now, and im taking these stock market classes. i decide fuck work im going to be making $800 a day. i quit.
i drop out of college and quit my job to party and learn the stock market. huge risk. but, no risk no reward. i have about 10 grand in the bank and i still have spirithoods for an income. so i decide; alright im pretty good at money management so i can make this 10 grand last until i learn and understand the stock market. about a week later i get an email from spirithoods. they decide to end the brand ambassador program. fuck. i now have zero income what so ever. 31. The next show is krewella, seven lions, and figure in Middle Oak. im pumped i really like krewella and my first experience with them wasn’t that great because of my knee bothering me. i show up to the show and theres a really long line. luckily for me a group of kids recognized me who were relatively close to the front. so i cut with them and make small talk. we get to the front of the line and security searches us. i hate getting searched whether i have drugs on me or not. i carry so much shit in my pockets its ridiculous, i have my phone, wallet, balloons, my cards, my keys, gum and sometimes jolly ranchers. so taking all this shit out of my pockets is a hassle. i don't have drugs on me so this search is just an inconvenience. we get inside and people immediately recognize me and want to take pictures. we take our pictures, they thank me and we go our separate ways. im walking through the crowd and this guy is whispering “molly, molly.” this guy looks shady as fuck, your stereotypical drug dealer. he had a long coat on, a beanie, and just looked shady as fuck. i buy molly off of him, .2 or 2 caps. cost me 20 bucks. molly is usually $10 for .1 or a cap. sometimes its $15 if you run into a middle man and not an actual dealer. so im happy i have my drugs. i dont take them yet. i wait until krewella goes on because i dont want to come down before it ends. im just wandering around the crowd meeting people. i love meeting new people so im having a blast. seven lions is killing it, i really like seven lions. i start blowing up my balloons and people around me ask if they can have some. so i give them some balloons to blow up, they're happy. theres probably 6 or 7 balloons floating through out the crowd. im just chillin where im at dancing, watching the balloons. this guy comes up to me “dude, i saw your balloons and had to find you!” i was like fuck yeah, and handed him a balloon. he's happy like hell yeah and blows it up. finally krewellas about to go on so i pop my molly. they go on and right after they go on it hits me, and it hits me hard. this shady guy has really good molly. im rolling hard, loving life. im really excited about taking this stock market class and all i think about is how much im going to learn and im motivated as fuck to learn every last thing about the market. i end up pretty close to the front, it was really packed and hard to move. but i see this other guy rolling harder than i am. hes having a blast. but this kid next to him keeps pushing him and getting angry cause the guy rolling keeps bumping in to him. i go up to the angry kid, “dude leave him the fuck alone. hes having a blast, if your going to be a little bitch about it YOU fuckin move.” he kind of shoves me and throws a little hissy fit, but does end up leaving the rolling guy alone. its to crowded up front so i step back so i have more room to dance. i chill more in the back for the rest of the show dancing with
myself. krewella throws down hard as fuck. this experience was much better than the last. krewella comes to and end and we had a blast, like usual. i leave and head back to the parking garage to find my car. one thing i struggle with is parking, i never remember where i parked. so i pretty much just wing it and wander around until i find my car. it took me like 20 minutes. i thought i parked on blue level 3. it turns out i parked on green level 3. fuck me right? 32. Boregore comes to town. hes playing at the Bright City. of course i go. i loved borgore at the forest so im pumped. a few days before borgore Jake txts me saying he wants to party. alright lets party, borgore is friday. friday rolls around and Jake comes over, he asks if i have any molly. i told him no i dont like driving with her in my car so i usually just find her at shows. so we get to the club, the lines not that long, takes us 5 minutes to get in and they don’t search us. thats one thing i do like about clubs is that they dont search you so the line goes by much faster and i dont have to empty all my pockets. we get in i run to the bathroom and Jake goes outside to smoke a ciGarette. i get out of the bathroom and go to the patio to see if i can find Jake. i walk around, not for very long because its freezing cold out, and i cant find him. back inside i go. its pretty packed inside, borgore is a pretty big name, im actually surprised hes playing at this club. i cant find Jake so i start looking for molly. finding molly was fairly simple i asked like 4 people. unfortunately for me i find a middle man so he wants $15 a cap. whatever i dont care. i buy .2, costs me 30 bucks. i start wandering around trying to find Jake. i wander around the back where theres more room and i don’t see him. well maybe he's up front. its pretty packed so i dont even bother. im in like the middle of the crowd and borgores about to go on. i quickly pop my molly and im ready to dance. borgore goes on, the lights flash and you feel the bass. i look into the sky and hold my hands up enduring the vibrations of the bass. i love feeling the bass, ill admit I've been a speaker hugger before. A speaker hugger is basically someone whose so fucked up they just hug the speakers because the bass against your chest or back feels amazing. waiting for the molly to hit you, you get really ansy and excited cause you know youre about to feel amazing and have a blast. so im jumping with excitement waiting for the molly to hit me and the music is amazing so i know im in for a good night. 15-20 minutes go by and i still dont feel the molly. now im like fuck did i just pay 15 a cap for bogus rolls? no, shortly after i think this it hits me. here we go! the molly hits me and not one but two mosh pits break out. im pissed. like really dude, a mosh pit? this is not the scene for a mosh pit. bros. bros tend to start the mosh pits, and were at a club so there are bros, lots of bros. i head towards the right side of the crowd away from the mosh pits, and i see Jake. hes pretty close to the front but i try and get up to him. i try and wiggle my way up there but i cant do it. its too crowded. i take one of my bracelets off and throw it at him trying to get his attention. boom headshot. i hit him right in the head. he turns around like what the fuck just hit me. im
jumping and waving my arms in the air trying to get his attention but he doesnt see me. whatever ill catch up with him later. i head to the back where theres more room to dance and i can see the stage better. i do my favorite dance move which is the swinging my head back and forth feeling my hair across my face. im rolling hard now so it feels utterly amazing. i chill here for the rest of the night borgore ends and during his last song he starts throwing cupcakes into the crowd. i was in the back so i wasnt to worried about getting hit. i continue with my head swinging. i look down and i see cup cake right next to my foot. phew it just missed me. i would have been pissed if i got hit with a cup cake. the show comes to an end and i meet up with Jake and Brett who Jake ran into at the show. we went to high school with Brett so i know him and we make small talk for a second about how sick the show was. Jake decides hes going to go to an after party with Brett. i was like ok cool i catch you guys later, and i peace out. we had a great night. i go home and check my facebook page, we’re at like 1,400 “likes” now. 33. the next show is dj bl3nd. i ended up having to miss this show because my stock market class started. i learn a lot in my class. im stoked, im convinced im about to make millions. i learn all these different chart patterns and when the stock should go up and when it should go down. i learn all this insider information on the markets and realize how dangerous and dirty the financial world really is if you dont know what youre doing. im taking classes so i should know what im doing. class is 9:00am to 5:00pm its all day but its only a week long every couple of months. i eventually learn trading stocks is extremely expensive and you need a lot of money to make money in the markets. i dont have a lot of money so my councilor talks to me about trading futures. futures is the way to go if you dont have a lot of money. so i sign up for the futures class they offer at the end of june. my class ends and i can start trading at home. i trade simulated so its fake money, just to practice and understand it better for when i take my futures class. im still really motivated to learn everything about the markets. 34. The next show is terravita. its a mardi gras party. my friend Al tells me about it. i honestly have no idea where i met Al i just randomly remember being friends with him( this happens with a lot of my friends). i just know i met him from going to shows. my friend Spencer hits me up and tells me he wants to party so i go with him to terravita. terravita is at this venue called The Mages Corner. we get to terravita and when we buy our and tickets they give us a free beads, awesome because i forgot mine. we get inside and immediately. this girl comes running up to me and gives me a hug. “do you know who i am!?” this girl is beautiful, holy shit. im thinking i have no idea who you are but i want to know you. “im Mitch’s friend” “okay fuck yeah i love Mitch, where is he?” she tells me he couldnt make it. she then asks if im rolling. i told her no but im looking for some. “give me money ill find you some” “okay fuck yeah how much is it?” “$10 a cap.” i give her 20 bucks and shes off to find me drugs. she comes back a few
minutes later with 2 pills. “fuck yeah thanks” she asks me for my number. i give it to her obviously. i find out her name is Heather. we actually become good friends. i pop my molly real quick because it turns out there was a conflict with the schedule and terravita ends up going on first instead of last. this sucks because once terravita ends pretty much everyone leaves. i try and find Spencer. Spencer is tripping his balls off on acid. i find Spencer and hes with his friend Dan that he found. Dan went to high school with us. i didnt know he was into the rave scene. we talk for a minute then im off to go wander around. im a wanderer i like to wander around and meet new people. wandering around i run into Papa Cuz. Papa Cuz is the guy i met at Middle Oak when i thought he was someone else. what a great way to meet someone. thats why i love the rave scene. “sup dude?” we make small talk for a few minute and then the molly hits me. this is some really good molly. its around 11:00pm at the time. so i run into the crowd ready to dance. im having a blast. i run into Al, the guy who told me about this show, and his friend Kim we’re both excited to see eachother and he introduces me to Kim. “this is the detroit panda man” Kim goes “oh ok yeah ive seen you at shows but never actually talked to you before” Kims really cool, i like Kim. im rolling hard right now so a conversation is not something im trying to have right now. but Al and Kim are like come with us. we make our way to the front by the speakers. they guide me to put my back against the speaker. rolling balls this is amazing. im a speaker hugger. i hang out in the front with the speakers the rest of the night. i have to find Spencer though so he can experience this amazing feeling. i find him, he looks lost as fuck tripping on acid. “come with me.” i guide him to the speakers, his eyes roll into the back of his head and has a huge smile on his face. he give me the thumbs up. i laugh and go to Al “he likes it” terravita comes to and end and its only like 12:30am, the show goes until 4. a lot of people leave but im rolling hard as fuck still so we stay hugging the speakers. we end up chilling with Kim and Al the rest of the night. showing everyone that stayed the power of the speakers. i havnt seen Heather in hours so i go on a mission to find her to show her the speakers. i look around for her for like 20 minutes and i cant find her. i guess she left. so i head back to the speakers. there’s now like 15 people standing against the speakers fucked out of their minds enjoying the bass. 3:30am rolls around and i start to come down. dam, i just rolled hard as fuck for like 4 hours on just 2 caps. tonight was a good night. i find Spencer and we’re both ready to leave. we say buy to everyone and were off. we’re hungry and Spencer informs me he wasn't supposed to go out tonight and cant go home until his mom leaves for work in the morning at 5:00am. so we go to taco bell and chill in the parking lot eating our tacos. Spencer really likes psychedelic art so he's showing me all these really cool trippy pictures. we end up looking up trippy pictures until he can go home. 35. the next show is carnage. carnage is playing at the Bright City. hes a trap DJ, trap music is basically hip hops influence on dance music. at the time im not a huge trap
fan, but i went anyway. i end up seeing Mitch, Heather, and their friend Penelope there. this is my first time meeting Penelope. Penelope is really cool. i dont become good friends with her until later, but shes cool as fuck. they end up chilling outside on the patio, i chill with them for a minute but its cold outside so i go back inside. at this current time im sober and haven’t found molly, definitely trying to find molly because im not a huge trap fan and i feel like i should get fucked up in order to enjoy it. im walking around, this isn't a huge show so there isn't nearly a many people as say borgore. so I’m like fuck, molly may be a little bit harder to find. its not, i find molly fairly quickly. i tend to be pretty good at finding molly. what ive learned through experience is that most dealers wear something on their head, whether it be a hat or a bandana. they usually have something on their head. the molly i find at this show isnt that great. but whatever, you win some you lose some, espeically when you have no idea what youre buying, youre just told its molly. so i dont roll very hard at this show but its still fun. i end up hanging out with Mitch and them most of the night. we have a blast. 36. after carnage is excision, at the end of march. its at The Mill where we saw avicii and kaskade. im pumped for this show. i saw excision last summer at identity fest and im telling everyone about how amazaing his 100,000 watt amplifiers are. i end up going with Nate and Jake. but we meet Drake and some of his friends there. Drake came with Austin and his friend from work. his friend from work supports his entire family and was going to roll for the first time. i was a little nervous about this. are you sure someone that supports his entire family should be fucking with drugs? but whatever he wants to roll let him roll. i lose Nate and Jake fairly quickly. i dont know where they went but they weren't in my site. so i end up chilling with Drake, Austin and his friend from work for most of the night. excision has this new stage called the executioner stage. its pretty sweet, im not sure whats its supposed to look like, but it looks like a giant mountiain and he’s in the middle of it. i pop my molly once he goes on. i wait for the molly to kick in so i blow up some of my balloons. i was really hoping his 100,000 watt amplifiers would pop my balloons. but they dont. guess the venue wouldn’t let him turn his amps up all the way. bummer. i feel bad because ive been telling a lot of people how crazy his bass is. so now i feel bad because his bass is not that loud. i mean its loud, but its not heart pounding im gonna throw up loud. im rolling pretty hard but honestly im more interested in Drakes friend from work, how his roll is going. hes going hard as fuck. he clearly feels/likes it. i decide im going to wander around, cause thats what i do, I’m a wanderer. I’m wandering around taking pictures with people and making small talk. my balloon are still floating in the air, and i hear this one kid say to his friend. “oh they say detroit panda man, whats a detroit panda man?” what perfect timing. im like “sup guys, those are my balloons.” “oh youre detroit panda man?” “yeah thats me” “what do you do?” “i just go to a bunch of shows” “thats awesome”
i continue my way around trying to find Nate and Jake. i end up finding them but they are on a floor lower than me and its packed as fuck where they are. so im like fuck it and go back to Drake, Austin and Drakes friend from work. Drakes friend is having a blast. i dont even think he realizes i left and came back hes rolling so hard. i look at Drake and say “hes having a blast” Drake says “yeah he is” excision comes to an end and none of my balloons were popped from the bass. a little disappointed but he still killed it and i had blast. i really wanted him to drop jaguar or sleepless. he might have but i dont remember, i was rolling pretty hard. needless to say i had a blast along with everyone else. i find Nate and Jake at the end of the show. they had a blast, as did i. i told them “i totally saw you guys but couldnt make it up to where you guys were it was so packed.” “yeah dude it was really packed where we were but it was crazy as fuck.” we meet up with Drake and his crew before we leave. i ask his friend from work “so how was it?” “holy shit crazy as fuck, you gotta let me know when the next one is.” i smile, fuck i dont want him to get suckered into the world of drugs and partying when he's supporting his entire family. i look out for people. the drugs are great but don’t lose control. dont let the drugs control your life. you control your life. 37. Excision was march 30th so its now april. april fools. i dont play an april fools joke on anyone because i don't want them to play a prank on me in revenge. shave my head or something while im sleeping, not about that. id be pissed, madder than hell. ive been growing my hair out for 2 years and i love it. the next show is showtek at the Bright City. im really excited, they’re hardstyle DJs. i have never seen a hardstyle DJ so im really looking forward to this show. i get to the club and i see Mitch, Heather, and Penelope there. Mitch is now my best rave friend. Mitch is cool as fuck. I'm starting to form a crush on Heather, and Penelope i still dont know that well but she appears cool. i hang out with them most of the night talking and just hanging out at the club waiting for showtek. we’re all rolling have a great time. showtek finaly goes on and Heather wants to dance so we rush to the floor and start dancing. we’re not grinding on each other fuck that shit, not about the grinding life. so we’re just dancing, rolling, having a great time. life is good. im starting to crush on Heather so im happy as fuck, like fuck yeah. we get tired so we go back to find Mitch and Penelope, they're back against the wall, and Mitch is giving people light shows. a light show is, there are these gloves with lights that blink at the finger tips and the glover moves their hands in crazy ways forming patterns and tracers for the person thats receiving the light show. it looks really cool if you're rolling or tripping on acid. im up next in line for a light show. i put my back agains the wall and just stare straight ahead. Mitch is pretty good at light shows so im in awe. a bunch of colors surrounding my body to the beat of the music. this is amazing. the lights get really close to my face, this is my favorite move that glovers do. i have no idea what this move is called, if it even has a name. but im feelin good in my own little wold with the lights
taking me to another world. Mitch ends the light show and i give him the thumbs up cause he did really well. showtek comes to and end, and honestly i was a little disappointed with the music because i was expecting a hardstyle set and they played an all house set. but i dont care, i was dancing with Heather most of the night, i was happy. i start txting Heather and we become good friends, and not only is she beautiful, she’s really fuckin cool. we say our goodbyes and i leave. we’re now at around 1,550 “likes” 38. the next show is mimosa. i txt Heather to see if she going to be there, and she is, hell yeah. i decide tonight im going to tell Heather i have a crush on her and see where it goes. so im pretty anxious for this show, i really like mimosa but im more excited to see Heather. the night of mimosa finally arrives. i get to the Bright City, and im more excited than ever. im in the line “sup panda man” its the line security guard “ oh what up dude?” im here so often the security guards now know who i am. i get inside and i see Mitch, “what up dude!” bro hug. “wheres Heather?” “ i dont know shes around here somewhere.” i go looking for Heather. and i hear this guy mumbling “molly, molly.” “oh you got molly? let me get 2 caps” i get my molly and the hunt continues. i finally find her both our faces light up and we give each other a hug. “lets go dance!” Heather shouts. so we head to the dance floor and start dancing. im like fuck here we go! i give her a huge hug, look her in the eyes and tell her i have a pretty big crush on her. she kinda shys away “no you dont.” fuck. she clearly does not feel the same. and she wanders off. i was a little upset but im not going to let it ruin my night. i pop my molly and start wandering around thinking “fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. i run into Mitch and im like “duuuude, im totaly crushing on Heather hard, i told her and she was not feelin it.” “yeah, i dont know what to tell you dude.” i laugh “ yeah it sucks, whatever though” now i just hope our friendship doesnt become awkward now because shes cool as fuck and id hate to ruin our friendship because of stupid feelings.” The rolls are kicking in so i go and dance. the night ends and im crushed. but im still rolling so life is good. i get home and in bed all i can think is how i should not have told her i had a crush on her and i fucked up. i end up falling a sleep after hours of over thinking my problem. i wake up in the morning and i txt Heather “sorry about last night.” she responds with “its fine dont worry about it.” i guess this sounds pretty good. no. our relationship goes to shit. its not awkward but its not nearly as strong as it was before. we go from dancing and hanging out all night to a hello hug and thats it. 39. our next show is mord fustang. Mitch calls me during the day “dude mord fustang isnt showing up so the show is free tonight if you RSVP.” i was like “really dude why isnt he showing up?” “i dont know.” i start thinking i might not go, i wanted to see mord fustang. but i also still want to party though, so we go. i get to the Bright City early because i like to socialize. i get in line and just randomly start talking to this group of people, Ryan, Lucas, Mason, Larry, and Alyssa. i
find out they are from toledo. i was like “thats awesome, how long of a drive was it?” “like 2 hours” i think its really cool when people drive long distances to a show. they’re all really cool and end up chilling with them all night. mord fustang didnt show up so the opener, milk and cookies headlined. they were actually really good. even though mord didnt show up i still had a lot of fun and made from friends from ohio. the night comes to an end and its time to say good bye to the toledo crew. i ask them if they come up here often, they said they're starting too. so we exchange number and keep in touch. 40. next shows are dada life at the Bright City and funtcase and cookie monsta at The Call Hall. they're on the same night. i decide to go to dada life because dada life was my favorite set at the forest and i was sober for it. so i choose dada life. this is where i meet my dealer sean. i get to the Bright City and im driving around the parking lot looking for a place to park and i see the toledo crew walking up to get in line. i stick my head out the window “what up guys!” “oh its panda man!” i park my car and go cut with them in line. the line is pretty long so this works out well. the perks of knowing everyone in the scene. we talk “how have you guys been?” “good yourself” “I've been pretty good.” but we’re all excited for dada life. we get inside and there a bananas everywhere. one of those bananas was Jeff, my friend Stacy's boyfriend. i haven’t seen Stacy in a while so seeing her and Jeff was great. the place is packed. im chilling in the back with Ryan and the rest of the toledo crew. they ask me if i have any molly, i told them no i have to find some still. about 5 minutes later they go outside to smoke a ciGarette, this guys walking through the crowd asking if anyone needs molly. i was like “oh fuck yeah, let me get 2 caps and follow me my friends are looking for some, they just stepped outside.” im making small talk with this guy while we’re looking for the toledo crew. we find them outside and they each buy 2 caps as well. “thanks dude.” “yeah no problem you know anyone else looking send them my way.” “okay dope.” people tend to ask me for molly all the time so i start sending them his way. im not a drug dealer, i will not touch the money or the drugs. but i can guide you in the right direction. the toledo crew and i head back inside and a few people ask me if i can find them molly. “yeah come with me” we go on a hunt to find that guy. it turns out his name is sean. i like wandering around so helping people out is fun for me. i have a train of like 4 people with me. i find sean, and he’s outside, “yo dude, help all these guys out?” “yeah i got them.” i head back inside to catch up with the toledo crew and sean comes up to me asking if i can buy him a drink, i was like “nah dude i get X’s on my hands, but my friend Ryan can help you out.” “hey Ryan you wanna buy sean a drink?” “yeah ill buy him a drink.” this is what starts our friend/dealer relationship. dada life goes on and i pop my molly. they open with happy violence. this is one of their more popular songs. it’s not my favorite but i do like it a lot. i start blowing up my balloons waiting for the molly to kick in. a couple other people ask me for a balloon. of
course i give them one. the molly hits me relatively fast. i roll, and i roll hard. im in lala land swaying my head back and forth feeling my hair brush against my face. this is an amazing feeling, hence me doing it all the time. im fucked out of my mind for all of dada life. I'm dancing, swaying, doing whatever the music tells me too. i come down about 15 minutes before the end of the show, and i still haven't heard my favorite song “feed the dada” they end up closing with it. i hate when artists close with their best songs because you’ve either come down from your roll or your just tired from dancing all night. in this case i was both. i was tired and i came down. so i didn't get to enjoy my favorite song as much as i had wanted too. the show ends and i say good bye to the toledo crew. “what show are you guys going to next?” “probably DEMF.” “okay hopefully ill see you guys at DEMF, get home safe.” i leave. in the parking lot i run into Stacy and Jeff. they ask “how was your dada life?” “amazing, i was a little disappointed they closed with feed the dada though, cause i came down and was tired. i was really hoping to be peaking for that song.” “we feel you on that one.” “alright im out of here guys ill catch you later!” “peace out panda.” now we’re at like 1,700 “likes” 41. im at home thinking about this whole panda man thing and how dope it is that i was able to build a name and establish a “fan” base for myself. so i have this great idea to make new cards. instead of just having my facebook url on them i decide to make “enlightenment cards” i call them. they say “your fuckin awesome and i think your beautiful.” then my facebook url at the bottom. just trying to spread the love. make people smile and feel good about themselves. i order 1,000 of them to pass out to people. the cards are a huge hit, people love them but people point out to me i used the wrong “your” instead of “you’re” fuck, are you serious, i ordered a thousand of them. so i come up with this comeback that “its the beauty of imperfection.” boom! take that haters. i get a lot of good feedback from these cards. people are telling me; “i keep it in my wallet at all times.” “i have it on my bathroom mirror so every morning i know im beautiful.” “i keep it on my dashboard in my car so i see it every day.” people love these cards. i love seeing people faces light up when i give them one. they go from a confused “what is this?” look, to a big smile “aww thats cute.” look. the cards are a success. some people start asking me if they can have a few to pass out at shows. “yeah go for it.” spreading the love and my name around for me, go for it. my favorite is when people come up to me and introduce their friend to me who is at his/her first show. i always give these people a card. what a great first rave experience. someone giving you a card telling you that you're beautiful. its very important they understand that the rave scene is all about love and not bros getting their dick wet. so these cards help out in that aspect.
42. cedric gervais comes to town. this is where i meet John. John becomes a good friend of mine. i get to cedric gervais and im on my hunt to find molly. i come across sean. “what up dude you got any molly.” of course he does. i buy .2. at this show i didnt do much wandering or anything i met John and literally talked to him the entire time. cedric gervais goes on and im in the back about to pop my pills and i end up talking to this guy next to me. his name is John. were both rolling pretty hard but we aren’t dancing or anything. we were just talking. we talked for like 3 hours straight. i dont remember what we talked about other than it being 1:30am and he had to be at work at 5:00am. i told him just don't think about it. if you go to bed thinking you're going to be tired in the morning you're going to wake up and the first thing you think is fuck im tired as hell. so your mind is automatically going to think you're tired. if you wake up like its a normal day your first thought wont be how tired you are and you'll be more awake. i used to do this all the time when i was working. cedric comes to an end and it was an alright show, im not a huge cedric fan but i met John and John is cool as fuck. we exchange numbers and keep in touch. i peace out.
A Ravers Best Friend
43. the next show is candyland its at the Bright City, they have this new summer thing called bass mission which is a patio party every wednesday. i originally wasn't going to go but my friend from high school, Donnie asked if i was going. so i decided to go. im glad i went because bass mission is dope and i went to every one all summer except for 2. i get to bass mission and its a little chilly out so i wore a long sleeve shirt. bad idea it was pretty hot, but whatever. i get there and im looking for molly immediately. i find sean. “what up dude, you got any molly.” “yeah.” “ dope let me get 2 caps.” life is good. we’re outside at a patio party and i have molly. i wander around the patio thinking “dam this is dope as fuck.” people keep asking me for molly so i send them to sean. sean lets me know “dude you bring me a lot of traffic, if you keep bringing people my way i can throw you some caps for free.” perfect! this is great. sean is now my go to guy. i go inside and end up meeting tom. tom is the part owner of the club. i go to introduce myself and he goes “i know who you are, you’re here all the time.” dope. i kind of smile to myself, awesome. we make small talk and i tell him how dope this patio party is. he was like “yeah its gonna be loud too. those speaker are only turned up 40%. so its gonna be bangin.” “hell yea dude thats dope. alright tom ill catch you later.” next i run into Henry. Henry is in charge of the marketing and the promoters for the club i believe. i start talking to him and hes like “yeah, just let me know whatever show you plan on going to and i can put you on the guest list.” okay fuck yeah, thanks Henry.” coming to bass mission was a great idea.
im on my way to the bathroom to fill up my water bottle and i see this girl at the bar. holy shit this girl is gorgeous, absolutely stunning. i have to give her a card. i go up to her and give her a card. her name is Grace. i really fuckin like Grace. we make small talk for a second, give a hug and im off to fill up my water bottle. i come back from filling up my water bottle and walk by Grace. as im walking by i give her the point and smile. she smiles and waves. Grace is fuckin awesome. i dont end up seeing her for the rest of the night though. i dont know where she went. but oh well. hopefully ill see her at other shows. i meet up in the middle of the crowd with Donnie, my friend from highschool. i nudge him “i feel it, you feel it bro?” “yeah i feel it.” “how much did you take?” he took .4. “oh shit dude you’re having a blast.” “fuck yeah i am.” i continued my wandering around, i met a lot of people and took a bunch of pictures with people. im passing out my new cards and people love them. some people go and find their friends and tell me i have to give them a card, i give them a card. their face lights up. this reaction never gets old. i run out of cards fairly quickly. i didn’t bring enough, i didn’t think i was going to pass out as many as i did. i lose my water bottle so i go to the bar to get another one. i make small talk with the bartender Aubrey. she’s really cool. she has a bunch of tattoos. i noticed the 2 birds on her collar bones first, they were my favorite. she tells me she sees my balloons all the time but has never actually gotten to meet me. so i gave her a card. she reads it “these are awesome.” i respond with “thank you.” Aubrey is really cool im glad i got to meet her. she becomes my first friend that works at this club. i got back outside and continue to party. i meet troublmakr. troublmakr is really cool hes a local DJ that plays at this club often. hes really good but at this time i haven’t seen him play yet. hes pretty drunk, im rolling balls. we get along well. he has a green mohawk. he doesn't spike it though he usually wears a hat. we talk and i tell him how dope this patio party is and how i plan on coming every wednesday. he agrees that this is dope as fuck. the show comes to an end and it was sweet as hell. i had a blast, and im really glad i went. wednesdays are now my favorite day of the week. i make a lot of my close friends on wednesdays during bass mission. we pretty much have our own bass mission family. 44. next show is the following wednesday minnesota at bass mission. followed by designer drugs, followed by micheal woods, followed by DEMF. minnesota is first. ive only heard a couple of songs by minnesota but its bass mission so i go anyway. im pretty exited for this show like i am any other show but especially this show because its bass mission and Stacy and Jeff are going to be there. i hit up Henry to ask is he can put me on the guest list. hes got me. hell yeah. i get to the show and meet up with sean to get my drugs. i buy .2 like usual. we make a little more than small talk. we’re becoming friends now. hes really cool, it turns out hes younger than i am and makes more money than he knows what to do with. i ask him roughly how much he makes a night, just out of curiosity. he told me he averages
$500-$700 a night. wow, holy shit. im still talking to sean and Heather comes up to me we say hello and give our hello hug and shes off on her way. i go to the bar to get my water and chit chat with Aubrey for a little bit. i really like talking to Aubrey. shes really cool. i dont know what we end up talking about but i talked to her for a good 15-20 minutes. she introduces me to the other bartender Brooke. Brooke is also really cool. i meet so many cool people in the rave scene its ridiculous. i walk back outside and i see Heather, im still crushing on Heather, and i see her kiss this other guy. my heart drops. im crushed inside. there is no worse feeling than watching your crush kiss another guy. im dead inside and want to go home. but i dont. i pop my molly instead. i start using molly to cope with my problems. this is not good. i go to sit down and wait for my molly to kick in. im ansy and sad at the same time. the molly kicks in and i go to wander around. im still hurt on the inside. another dealer comes up to me asking if i need molly. “yes let me get 2” i pop those immediately. im not too worried about over dosing like i was before because Donnie was on .4 the other night so im not worried at all. i continue wandering and another dealer comes up to me. “yes let me get 2.” im now 6 pills deep. and still a little upset, ok im not upset becasue im rolling pretty hard but Heather kissing that other guy is still on my mind. im wandering around the crowd rolling balls and look in my wallet and i have 10 bucks left. im like fuck it, im gonna find sean and by another cap. im on a mission to find sean and i meet garret. garrets looking for caps too so i tell him to follow me. garret and i become good friends. we find sean and im like “yo dude can i get 1 more, and this is garret hes looking for some as well.” he hooks both of us up. ive now taken .7, 7 pills of unknown chemicals from multiple dealers are now in my body. panda dont give a shit. finally Heather is no longer on my mind. im rolling face and end up chilling with garret all night. we have a blast were dancing harder than ive danced before, and my swaying dance feels like a million bucks. im happily fucked out of my mind. i feel great about myself. garret and i end up pretty close to the front on the left against the wall, we end up chilling here most of the night. actually im not sure what we end up doing most of the night because i cant really remember, but leaning against the wall with garret sticks out in my mind. we talk about drugs and hes a fan of tripping on LSD. i told him molly is the only drug i fuck with because its “not addictive” and i have an addictive personality. the night comes to an end and I've had the most fun I've ever had, and i made a new friend. im a little upset that its over and have to say goodbye to everyone. i tell garret “im peacin out.” we exchange numbers and keep in touch. i go and say bye to Henry and thank him for the guest list spot. “no problem dude, just let me know whenever you plan on coming out.” i really like Henry. Henry is really cool. designer drugs is the next day. i hit up John to see if hes going and he is. i get to the club and theres literally no one there. the red wings were in game 7 of the semi finals so everyone stayed home. there might have been a total of 40 people at this show if that many.
the opener is dogfingaz. I've never seen him before but he lays down a dirty trap set and im diggin it. he played one song that really stuck out to me and i needed to know the name of it but no one knew what the name of it was. dogfingaz eventually ends and i see him walking around the crowd so im like fuck yeah im going to ask him what song that was. unfortuneatly i dont remember how it went. fuck me right? but i tell him he killed it and that i was really diggin his set. he thanks me and i go back up to John and chill with him. designer drugs goes on and they’re pretty good. nothing really to say about this show. the next day, friday, we have michael woods. i show up to the Bright City ready to party. i get inside and this guy Owen comes up to me “dude are you panda man?” “yeah thats me.” “oh fuck yeah ive wanted to meet you for a while! lets get a picture.” we take our picture and we talk for a minute. he tells me he gets mad bitches. i laugh fuck yeah gettin bitches. i dont know much about gettin bitches, im not much of a player. later that night i end up meeting a guy named cola. cola is a real cool guy we end up chilling for most of the show. show comes to an end. it was an alright show but i met some cool people, Owen and cola. so i would say tonight was a success. i get home and laying in bed, im still pissed that Heather now barely talks to me. so i txt her “haha sucks for you *stick out tongue emoji*” she responds “why?” i txt her back “cause i dont have a crush on you anymore *stick out tongue emoji*” she resonds “*sad face emoji*” this is great. she now talks to me again. were back to being good friends. mission accomplished. Heather is too cool of a girl to lose over something as stupid as a crush. 45. DEMF. were now at around 2,000 “likes”. a thousand more than last year so we’re doin good. DEMF is saturday through monday on memorial day weekend. its quite cold this weekend like hoodie weather cold. i decide to wear long sleeves. i get to DEMF around 3:00pm i think the doors open at like 2:00pm im not exactly sure. i get to heart plaza where DEMF is being held and theres a long line almost around the corner. but before i can get in line i have to find a place to park. i drive around in circles looking for a parking garage and i finally found one down the road a little bit. its $3 all day, you cant beat that. so i park there. im walking up to the line and its long. but luckily i see the toledo crew in line. fuck yeah, i cut with them and they're fairly close to the front. we get up to the front where security is searching everyone and they search us, everything out of our pockets. they pat us down and let us through. we make it through security and start walking to one of the stages. we get about 150 feet past the gates and this security guard calls out to me “hey panda hat! you got anything on you that you dont want me to find?” im thinking “fuck you buddy why do you have to call me out, out of everybody here.” but i tell him no i dont. i didnt have any drugs on me so he can search me all day i dont give shit. he didnt end up searching me, he bluffed. what an ass.
finally the guy leaves us alone and we can continue towards the festival. i turn me head and the toledo crew is gone. no idea where they went. whatever ill find them later. so im on my own. im walking by the vendor booths and i see Sophia. i dont remember what show i met Sophia at but i haven’t seen her in forever so seeing her was exciting. she’s wearing a cat in the hat type costume with her nose painted black and whiskers on her cheeks. we talk and catch up. we end up talking for like a half hour and i give her one of my cards. she smiles “aw thank you.” i continue wandering around. i decide to go to the underground stage which is literally like a giant room underground. its perfect for a stage. what they do with this giant underground room when DEMF is not happening i have no idea. but its prefect for DEMF. im not down here long. i was down there for like 20 minutes then headed to the electric forest stage. this is the stage i hung out at for pretty much the entire festival. im on my way to the electric forest stage and i see this guy sitting by himself with a chess board. i walk by and he asks if i want to play. he was by himself so sure ill play. “alright loser pays out 5 bucks.” alright fuck you buddy im not playing. i continue to the forest stage. i get to the forest stage and i see a blue hat in the crowd. its blue hat Blake. i have no idea what show i met blue hat Blake at, but i see him all the time. i like blue hat Blake. i quickly make my way to blue hat Blake to say whats up. “oh fuck yeah!” were both pumped to see each other. we chill and dance for a minute. i dont remember who was playing at the time but it was pretty groovy i guess. i go to wander around the crowd some more and i txt Mitch to see where he's at. he's off to the side on the grass with Penelope. okay im on my way. i get to the grass and i cant find them. i call Mitch “where you at?” its hard to hear him with the music playing. while im on the phone trying to hear where he's at i see them “okay i see you guys, bye.” they were sitting down. i sit next to them. i love sitting in the grass and i never turn down a chance to sit in the grass. so i sit with them and we talk. this is when i actually start becoming friends with Penelope. shes going to spring awakening in a few weeks and she's really excited for it. so we talk about that for a while. i would have liked to have gone but i didn't want to drive there. if spring awakening was in detroit and not chicago i would have gone. i have to go to the bathroom so i head to the porta potties that are just on the other side of the grass. im walking to the bathrooms and hear someone call out “panda!” i turn around and its Jane. “yes!” i love Jane. i get distracted from going to the bathroom and sit down with Jane for a minute. i ask her how her DEMF is going and she's enjoying it just wishing it was warmer. i agreed it was pretty chilly outside. like hoodie weather chilly. she introduces me to her boyfriend. i dont remember his name it was a unique name. he's really cool though. a real happy guy, he does a lot of yoga and you can tell he does a lot of yoga just by looking at him and by his personality. i keep working my way to the bathroom and theres a line. so i sit on this statue that has ledges around it. i sit down on the ledge next to this tall guy. “sup dude?” “not much just resting my legs.” i end up talking to this guy for like an hour. i find out his
name is Thomas. we talk about space and the stars. i hate talking about space because i have so many questions no one has answers for, i find this very frustrating. but we talk about space. our different theories on the stars and what not. the big and little dipper. this was a very interesting conversation hence it lasting for an hour. you know thats what i love about the rave scene. random guy on a ledge and i can talk to him for an hour about whatever the fuck crosses out mind. i like Thomas. we become friends. i think he's from ohio but i don't remember exactly, but i know he’s not from around detroit. i had a good talk with Thomas but finally i make it to the bathroom. on my way back to the forest stage i run into a guy named Nolan. he has a green spirithood on. i make comment about his hood, and we start talking. not for very long but we talk. i finally make it back to the forest stage and i see Heather and her sisters, Maria, and Bailey. we hang for a while, but they wanted to go up front. im not part of the whole lets go to the front crowd. i like my space to dance. i don't want to stand squished like sardines at a dance festival. i want to dance. but i end up going pretty close to the front with them anyway. we start on the side and cut our way across the crowd sideways rather than starting in the back and trying to move forward. on our way across the crowd i run into Stacy and Jeff. i tap Heather on the shoulder ‘im chillin here.” “okay.” she didnt make it much further so were still basically next to each other. i chat with Stacy and Jeff for a while, and they're both tripping on acid. so they’re all giggly enjoying the visuals. i start getting a little claustrophobic so i start working my way to the back of the crowd. i see the toledo crew so i go catch up with them. “oh what up guys, im back.” “where'd you go?” “where'd i go? where'd you guys go?” “we went to toki monsta at the red bull stage.” i laugh “oh shit, i went to the underground stage.” we all laugh, miscommunication. but its all good. i don’t remember who exactly we saw but i chill with them for the next couple of artists that play the electric forest stage. the festival is about to close for the day and square pusher is closing out the red bull stage. my friend Sam told me to see him so i saw him for a little bit. he was pretty good. he wore this like t.v thing on his head which was really cool, i thought. but it was kind of small and hard to see what was being played on it. it looked like it was the same visuals they had on the screen in the background. it turns out that is what it was. i wish the tv was a litle bit bigger because that was a really cool feature. not as cool as deadmua5’s mau5head though. one does not simply top deadmau5’s mau5head. i check out square pusher for like 20-25 minutes then i leave because i want to beat traffic getting out of the festival and parking garage. theres nothing worse than getting stuck in traffic after a show/festival when you’re dead tired. DEMF day 1 was a success. i ended up passing out all of my cards and met a lot of awesome people. Day 2, sunday. i end up getting to heart plaza around 3 ish. same as the first day. i park in the same parking garage because its cheap and i know where its at. its kinda far, well no its not, its like a 6 or 7 minute walk from the garage to the festival. im walking to the gates and the line is just as long if not longer than it was yesterday. luckily for me someone notices me “what up panda!” i cut in line with this guy. “not much ready to get into the festival.” we end up talking until we get through security. “alright it was nice
talking to you panda, peace.” “peace out bro.” i give him a card and he holds it “fuck yeah.” i head to the bathrooms. it turns out there are actual bathrooms at the underground stage. so i use those. fuck the porta potties. i wander down to the underground stage and this really small girl maybe 4 foot tall, with crutches, there must have been something wrong with her legs, i don't really know i didn't want to ask incase she didnt want to talk about it. her and her friend come up to me and ask for a picture. i was like yeah totally but this girl needed a card first because she was fuckin awesome and i thought she was beautiful. she was different. she had something not a lot of people had, crutches and she was really short. she was unique. being unique is something special whether its something you're proud of or not. people say everyone is unique. its bullshit, not everyone is unique. everyone is different, not unique. this girl was unique, this girl was awesome, this girl was special. this was one of the happiest girls I've met too. i get in the bathroom and this huge kandi kids (a kandi kid is someone that wears a bunch of pony bead bracelets and necklaces. i used to be a kandi kid but got annoyed with making bracelets all the time) face lights up. “are you detroit panda man?” “yeah thats me.” “oh my god can i trade kandi with you?” i was like “i dont have any kandi but if you want to give me one ill keep it forever.” “okay, okay, ill give you this one.” we did the hand shake; peace, love, unity, respect. and he slipped it on my wrist. i still have his kandi. i have every piece of kandi anyone has ever given me in a box in my room. im already at the underground stage so i chill there for a minute. i run into Mitch, his friend Bailey, and Eva. Eva is dressed as a “rave girl” wearing almost no clothing and im pissed because she’s underage. shes like 16 or 17. shes still in high school going to class like “yeah I'm cool i went to DEMF here was my outfit.” (i dont know if this is what she actually said, I'm just mocking her.) you're not cool you're jail bait, put some clothes on. we don’t chill at the underground stage for very long Mitch and them wanted to catch some act. i don’t remember who it was, he told me but i couldn't hear him because it was so loud. so they leave. i leave shortly after to go back to the electric forest stage. i make it to the electric forest stage and I'm kind of tired so i take a nap in the grass, not a long nap, maybe 45 minutes. i wake up and there was a girl playing at the electric forest stage. i don't remember her name but honestly i wasn't diggin it, it was to slow for me. but whatever shes about to end. i meet this kid named Cooper. hes a kandi kid. not as big of a kandi kid as the guy i met in the bathroom but still a kandi kid. we talk and both of us are not digging this girls set on stage. so i tell Cooper alright I'm going to go to the bathroom real quick. the next guy comes on stage. his name is milkman. he talks on the mic “alright guys i gotta a little bit more energy for you.” “i tell Cooper ok ill check this guy out for a second, then ill go to the bathroom” this guy destroys it, absolutely destroys it. every song he dropped was a banger. i look at Cooper. “ive never heard of this guy before but he is killing it right now.” before i know it milkmans set is over and i never
ended up going to the bathroom. so i really have to go now, but boy am i glad i didn't miss that set. that actually ends up being my favorite set of the weekend. after i go to the bathroom i find Heather again. she’s super fucked up and cold. it was really cold this day and the sun was starting to go down. noisia was going on next at the forest stage but Heather is super fucked up and cold so i play nurse and try and help her out. we go sit down in the grass for a minute, but she’s really cold and shivering. i didn’t have a jacket or anything to give her so i suggested lets go to the underground stage it will be warmer there. so we go to the underground stage and i end up losing Heather, whoops. so i try and find her and i cant do it, i have no idea where she went. so i don’t know if i should leave and catch the end of noisia or if i should try and find Heather. i ended up running into one of her sisters who was looking for her. “i don’t know where Heather went i turned around and she was gone, she should be down here somewhere but i have no idea.” so i end up looking for Heather a little longer with her sister. we split up, i cant find her and her sister is looking for her so i go and try and catch the end of noisia. Heather will be fine. i get back to the forest stage and noisia is over. i missed them. but someone in the crowd was selling E pills. I've taken molly before but never an E pill. so i buy one i want to try and E pill. it was a white dove he called it. so i buy it for 10 bucks. fuck yeah i decide to save it for tomorrow. i run into John and i tell him how i found an E pill and that im pumped to try it tomorrow. John knows more about E pills than i do and he tells me white doves are good. so im excited. the rest of the night i just wandered around and met a bunch of people. Day 3, monday. monday had the best lineup at the forest stage, paper diamond, griz, gramatik, and big gigantic all played that night. however monday was the worst day. it was cold and rainy. so before i left to go to the festival i stopped at walmart and bought a nice ass poncho with a zipper, a hood, and pants. im not getting wet. and i figured if i bought a $30 poncho with my luck it wouldn't rain. i head to the festival with my poncho and camelbak. i forgot my camelbak the first 2 days. ive got my poncho very tightly packed in my camelbak. security makes me take it out and i have a hard time putting it back in. i was pissed, but i knew they were going to take it out so i dont even know why i put it in there before i went through security anyways. but try to get the pancho back in my camelbak. its chilly the clouds are low. its totally going to rain later. so i put on my poncho now so i dont have to put it on later and because im getting frustrated trying to put it back in my camelbak. i leave the poncho unzipped for now so i dont get to hot since its not raining yet. i work my way to the forest stage and i meet up with a bunch of my friends from high school that i see there. we chilled under a tree for most of the day. E pills last a lot longer than molly does so i take my white dove early. im excited and very ansy to roll hard as fuck on this E pill. i think i start to feel it after about 15 minutes. so im really excited. it turns out i was imagining things. after about 2 hours i still have not rolled. so i bought a bunk E pill. fuck. you win some you lose some i guess. well now i want to roll. so i go on a hunt for molly. i run into my friend Smalls. hes a big guy, real big guy. but he goes by Smalls. we
went to high school together and i know he usually sells molly. but he doesnt have any. i chill with him for a while though cause he’s one of the nicest guys I've ever met. we end up becoming good friends. i continue my hunt for molly, im looking for sean but cant find him. but i end up finding some anyway. i dont know who the guy was but he helped me out. i bought a half gram or .5. its not in caps its in powder so he gives me a bag with it. it costs me 50 bucks. thats the going rate so i dont complain. sean will usually hook me up with .5 for $40 but thats because i help him, he helps me. paper diamond is about to go on so i start taking finger dips. eventually i say fuck it and just take the whole bag. becasue we’re trying to roll face after that E pill didnt work. the molly tastes awful. after all you are eating chemicals so obviously its not going to taste good. the molly hits me in about 25 minutes right when paper diamond goes on. it also starts raining so i put my hood up and zip my poncho. physically I'm miserable, i hate the rain. but mentally I'm amazing, i feel phenomenal. i just took a half gram so I'm feeling good. I'm dancing and loving life. paper diamond is dope. i saw him for a second and at electric forest 2011 and i wasnt diggin him. but this time he killed it and not just because i was rolling. well maybe it was because i was rolling but i think the rolls just added even more greatness to it. im freezing cold even with my poncho on. its now down pouring. if i wasn't rolling id be finding shelter where i can stay dry. paper diamond ends and finding shelter is exactly what i did so i head to the underground stage along with just about everyone else at the festival. it was packed down there. but once i got down there the 16 year old comes up to me. im ecstatic “fuck yeah dude whats up!?” “i saw you and had to say hi.” “good!” he only came on monday he couldn't make saturday or sunday. which is unfortunate because its raining in buckets. but other wise monday was going to be the best day. he just wanted to say hi then he was off to find his friends. i run into this guy Levi. i met him before but i dont remember which show, i just remember it was at the Bright City. i was telling him about my E pill experience. “have you ever heard of a chicago mint?” “no whats that?” “its basically compressed molly, they're fuckin crazy. theyre like the number one E pill. if you ever find one buy it immediately.” “okay i will.” sounds great i want to try a mint, so i keep my ears open in case i hear of any coming to town. after i talk to Levi i meet this soldier in the air force, it being memorial day, i shook his hand and thanked him for his service. then gave him a card. we start talking. and somehow we get on the topic of the stock market. im all about this topic. ill talk to you about the stock market all day. he tells me how his buddy works on wall street and has his own helicopter. my jaw drops. dam i want my own helicopter. we talk for a good 1520 minutes. then he leaves to go do his own thing. after i talk to him i run into Bridgette. Bridgette works at the Bright City. i eventually know just about everyone that works there. Bridgette is really cool she has blue and black hair and is spinning poi when i ran into her. poi is these balls that light up on a string and you swing them around and make cool patterns with the lights. I've personally never spun poi but a lot of people do so it must be some what fun.
the festival ends in like 2 hours and im freezing cold so i say fuck it im leaving. so i peace out. the festival was a blast but monday sucked it was awful. the rain completely ruined it for me. i cannot stand the rain. everything about the rain i hate. its now monday and we’ve gone to a show/festival every day since wednesday. im exhausted. i go home and go right to sleep. the partying continues in 2 days on wednesday for bass mission. i need to rest. 46. wednesday, bass mission. team bayside high are playing tonight. i hit up John to see if he’s going. he is, hell yeah. John is part of the bass mission family. hes one of the people that are there every week. the thing i love about bass mission is that its a smaller crowd but a much cooler crowd than you’re typical club scene crowd. the real ravers come out during the week. i get to bass mission and i meet up with John. we’re both looking for molly. we look for a while but its early still so there aren't a lot of people here yet. but eventually i see sean. “what up dude?” “not much you lookin for molly?” “yeah let me get .4” we took .7 the other day and survived so we’re not too worried about .4. .4 is now my warm up roll. every time i roll i start with .4 and usually end up buying more. we got our molly so we’re happy. i go to get a water and chit chat with Aubrey and Brooke. they’re happy to see me, im happy to see them. i like Aubrey and Brooke. we dont really talk about anything important just a friendly chit chat. i go back outside and wander around. i end up meeting this girl Alexa. she’s really cool and has dreads. we talk. i give her a card, and i continue wandering. garret shows up. im pumped to see garret, i really like garret. he also becomes part of the bass mission family. we hangout in the back by the couches with Henry and them until team bayside high goes on. Henry introduces me to his fiance Alice. shes really cool she has a bunch of tattoos and cool hair. i congratulate them on getting married. they start telling me their story they were at cochella which is a music festival out in california. Henry told all his friends he was going to propose to her during pretty lights. how awesome is that? so when pretty lights went on all their friends formed a giant circle around Henry and Alice. Henry then got down on one knee and he asked Alice to marry him. she said yes, obviously. “thats an awesome story.” garret and John agree thats fuckin awesome. “do you guys know when youre getting married?” i asked them. “yeah next year at EDC (Electric Daisy Carnival).” EDC is one of the biggest electronic dance music festivals in the country if not the world. i tell them “fuck yeah that is so sick! congrats guys thats fuckin awesome.” “thanks, we’re really excited.” we end up chilling with them for a while until it starts getting more packed. its now like 11:30 its pretty packed and team bayside high goes on at 12:00am so i pop my molly. so by the time it hits me team bayside high will be going on. i go wander around and dance waiting for the molly to kick in. the molly hits me and i start dancing through the crowd spinning in circles having a blast with my arms wide as if im singing in a musical.
i meet these 2 girls; Oracle and Charm. I've seen them before but never actually talked or got to meet them. they’re total hippy ravers. they both have dreads and you just know they smoke a shit ton of weed. Oracle and Charm are not their actual names but this is what they told me their names were when i first met them so thats what i call them. i always forgets Charms name but she shows me that she has alphabet beads in her hair that spell “Charm” okay thats awesome. thats how i remember her name from now on. i run into Mitch and Penelope. Mitch is my best rave friend at this point so i hang with them for most of the night. Heather's around somewhere but who knows where. were standing against the wall and Penelopes really excited to spring awakening because its next week or coming up. we chill against the wall talking about molly. im a fan of molly so i enjoy this conversation. shes not sure if she wants to bring molly and risk driving to chicago with it, or find it there. i personally would find it there. fuck that im not going to drive 5 or so hours with a felony in my car. i tell her about chicago mints since shes going to chicago. “yeah i here they’re fuckin amazing.” tell her. shes heard of them but has never had one. i told her “im definitely trying to find mints at the forest” “aw lucky youre going to the forest?” “hell yeah im going to the forest.” she couldnt make going to the forest she had to work or something. i dont exactly remember why she wasn’t able to go, but she couldn’t make it. we talk about the forest i tell her she needs to go next year. the forest is magical. its the only large festival ive been too. DEMF is a pretty big festival but its not huge, people don’t come from all over the country for DEMF. People do for the forest. she agrees that she has to go next year. i randomly tell her “this bass mission thing is dope as fuck, wednesdays like my favorite day of the week now.” i tend to do that when im rolling ill just randomly talk to you about something. she totally agrees that bass mission is dope. sometimes she has to come late though becasue she works. she usually ends up getting down here around 11:00pmish. i usually try and arrive around 10:00pm-10:30pm i have to get there before 11:00pm in order to get in for free from the guest list that Henry puts me on. i talk to Penelope for quite a while. i really like Penelope. i go wander around some more dancing through the crowd doing whatever the fuck im doing. i see Alexa, the other girl with dreads. im rolling really hard now and just want to talk to someone about anything really. so i grab Alexa and tell her to come sit down with me. first thing i say to her “woo, i am rolling balls right now.” we talk for probably a half hour about absolutely nothing. but it was a good talk. we became friends after this. i see her quite often at bass mission. bass mission comes to an end and we say our good byes to everyone we met tonight and we go home. tonight was a great night. along with just about every other night we roll really hard. 47. the next show is actually a festival and its on my birthday, its the weekend of june 9th. its Metallicas music festival, orion festival. its on belle aisle. i only go because they have an entire stage for dance music. its called the sanitarium stage. some big
names are playing, bassnectar, borgore, 12th planet, datsik, destroid, dillion francis adventure club. theres a good line up for DJs. but the rest of the acts are heavy metal. i hate heavy metal. its a saturday-sunday festival. i go with Drake. i havnt been to a show with Drake in like 4 or 5 months so im pumped that we’re going together. instead of driving down to detroit both days we just got a hotel. its about a mile down the street from belle aisle. saturday comes around so we drive down to detroit, and check into our hotel. we meet some of the other people staying at the hotel that are also going to the festival. they’re metal heads but they were cool. they were most excited to see gogol bordello, same with Drake. gogol bordellos has been Drakes favorite band since like 10th grade back in high school. i dont mind gogol but they’re not my favorite and im definitely not going to be missing a DJ to see them. we take a shuttle bus to the ticket booth where you then ride a bus to the island of belle aisle. we get to the ticket booth i believe it was at the Cobo center but im not 100% sure. we see probably 3-4 thousand people in line. we’re praying to god this was not the line to get on the bus. we ask people in line “what is this line for?” they tell us “will call.” oh thank god. we already have our tickets. for some reason they came in the mail. pretty much everyone else got will call. we ended up talking to people that had to wait in the will call line, they had to wait 5 hours for their ticket. thats almost half of the first day. they were pissed. they drove 6 hours to get here and paid $750 for a vip ticket. i was like holy shit i would be madder than hell. they were, they were not happy. i feel bad for them and tell them im sorry. we start walking to the bus stop to get on a bus. the line is around the corner. luckily i saw Leo in about the middle of the line. Leo is a kandi kid. im not sure where i met Leo but ive seen him at a bunch of shows before. so we cut with Leo, quite a few people are making fun of me in line because i have a panda hat, a pink tie dye shirt,and shiny disco pants on. remember were at a heavy metal festival. i find it quite comical that they’re making fun of me because they’re your stereotypical asshole metal heads. i definitely don’t fit in at this festival. we get on the bus and its like a 5 minute bus ride to the island. we get off the bus and have to walk a little ways to get to the festival. as we’re walking up to the gates a news reporter stops me and asks if he can interview me for the news paper. yeah sure why not. he asks me where i was from and who i was most excited to see. i told him i was most excited to see destroid because it was only their second live show and they wear crazy predator costumes on stage. he thanks me and i give him a card. he reads it “detroit panda man? okay. this card is awesome. you have a great day.” i laugh “thanks, you too.” we make it to the gates and the search us. “turn around, ok you’re good to go.” that was it, we didnt have to empty our pockets or even lift our shirts. we just had to turn around. we get inside and Jane immediately notices me and runs up and give me a hug. i introduce her to Drake. she says “you look familiar.” i interrupt “yeah you smoked opium with him at the forest last year.” she laughs quite hard. “i knew i recognized you.” Drake
laughs “yeah that was me.” Jane goes back to her friends and we continue towards the music. this kid comes up to us and tells us he's got it all. he had ketamine and molly. oh yeah hes “got it all” i joke with him about this. he finds it funny “but serisouly you guys need any molly or K.” “yeah let me .5 of molly” we sit in down so he can get it out of his back pack. we’re making small talk he tells us he's from chicago. i immediately ask if he has any mints. he said “usually i do but not today.” “dam! i hear they’re crazy.” “oh yeah you want to roll face you eat a mint. the things are ridiculous.” i get my molly and we say our good byes. he says “yeah ill be at the sanitarium stage if you need anymore.” “alright ill find you.” Drake asks where im headed. i tell him im going to be at the sanitarium stage all weekend. hes trying to see some bands so we split ways and catch up later. i head over to the sanitarium stage and Kent, the guy we used to see at every show with his brother Greg, calls me. “hey are you and Drake at orion fest?” “yea! are you?” “yeah, where are you guys?” “im at the sanitarium stage Drake went so see some band.” “ok ill find you.” i meet Kent at the sanitarium stage. im excited to see him, i haven't seen him in forever. i meet up with Kent, he goes “dude, i went through all this hassle of hiding this fifth by taping it to my leg and they didn’t even search you.” i laugh. “i know dude it was great, i hate when they search you it takes so long.” “yeah, hey wheres Drake?” “hes seeing a band called foals i believe.” “okay im going to go find him.” “alright ill be here all weekend so come find me.” dirty phonics is playing. i haven’t seen them in 2 years. i saw them for the first time at shazzzam in that warehouse back in 2011. im really liking dirty phonics. its a group of 4 or 5 people. i go ahead and take some rolls, i bought 5 but i only pop 3. im wandering around the crowd waiting for the rolls to kick in and this one metal head is up front diggin the fuck out of this set. he’s head banging like he’s pissed at the world. but he’s a metal head so you know his angry head banging is a sign that he likes it. one of the members of dirty phonics stands on the DJ table and starts talking into the mic. i don’t really know why but i like when DJs stand on the table. i mean its really not that cool, but for some reason i really like it, strange. “what up belle aisle!” he shouts into the mic. i continue you wander around the crowd as the molly hits me. i end up in the back where i see Henry and Alice. “oh what up guys.” i hang with them for a little bit and we talk about the bullshit will call line. they agree it was complete bullshit and they needed to fix that. i dance with them for a while. then i continue on my way. my cousin Billy and his friend show up. ive seen Billy at a few shows before and now we’re pretty good friends. so i go and chill with him in the grass for a little bit. his friend has molly and asks if i need any. no i dont, but i will later so i go ahead and buy a $30 sack. he hooks me up with a half gram. you cant turn that down, thats a great deal. i thank him. “no problem bro you’re Billy’s cousin, i got you.” i continue to chill with them for a minute until i venture off again. i have to pee really bad so i go to the porta potties. theres a line and i end up talking to this one guy. hes diggin my pants. so i give im a card. he smiles and thanks me. i get into the porta potty and im thinking “the fuck? it smells good in here.” smelt like
someone was burning a cinnamon scented candle. i try and pee but nothing is coming out. ok so i try some more. still nothing. ok whatever ill try again later. dirty phonics ends and borgore is up next. i like borgore so i go up into the crowd. Billy and his friend, i actually think its his roommate stay chilling in the grass. “hey you know anyone thats looking for anything, come find me.” “will do!” i go up into the crowd and find blue hat Blake. i like blue hat Blake. so i chill with him for most of borgore. there ends up being a mosh pit. i fuckin hate mosh pits but we’re at a heavy metal festival so its kind of inevitable. blue hat Blake and i are pissed. so we jump in the pit and turn it into a dance circle which is the ravers mosh pit. the metal heads kind of look around like “who are these faggots?” needless to say the mosh pit stops and probably 4 or 5 other people join us in the dance circle. the rest of borgore was very nice though. no moshing and he played a dope set. there was one song he played that i had never heard before but really wanted to know the name of. it was an unreleased song i ended up having to wait a few weeks before i could find out the name of it. Drake and Kent end up coming back to the sanitarium stage not for very long though. they find me and ask whose playing i tell them borgore “okay fuck that.” Drake hates borgore and they go back to a different stage. i end up catching them later. borgore is almost over. borgore ends and Drake and Kent come back. they’re both hammered drunk. after borgore was dillon francis. i really like dillon francis but missed him at DEMF the previous year because someone told me he pre records his sets, which im pretty sure is bullshit. so im pumped for dillon francis. i pop the other 2 caps that i didnt take earlier. and i still have that half gram from my cousins roommate in my pocket. so we’re good to go. dillon goes on and kills it. Kent’s not a bro but he does enjoy dancing with the ladies. so hes trying to dance with a girl all day, and hes having bad luck. i laugh at him and make jokes. “fuck you dude, ill get one.” about 5 minutes later he’s dancing with 2 girls. one of them offer him a dip of molly. he accepts. then she asks if i want a dip. i also gladly accept. i take a small one because its free and not mine. she makes fun of me and tells me to take a big one, and while my finger was in the bag she squeezes it. my whole finger is now covered in molly. i like this girl. i suck on my finger to get all the molly off of it and it tastes horrible. but it’ll be well worth it in a half hour or so. dillon francis is about to end and theres only one act left after him which is bassnectar. so i go ahead and eat the other half gram i had in my pocket. we’re now roughly a gram deep. im feeling great. dillon francis ends and there is like a 30 minute time gap in between sets. why, i dont know. i decide to go chill with my cousin in the grass. ive been standing and dancing all day, my legs are tired. so sitting in the grass sounds splendid. I'm talking to Billy and his roommate for a minute and my friend Miles finds us. he comes to sit down. and asks if i can get him molly. i point to Billy’s roommate. “you can help me out?” “yeah how much you lookin for?” “let me get a $40 bag.” he hooks him up with a half gram. not as good of a deal that i got but im special cause im his roommates cousin. “thanks dude.” this older guy probably in his late 30s to 40s, an old school metallica fan, comes up to us. “hey what are you guys doin? are those drugs?” “yeah its molly.” “oh can i get
some im trying to party, what do i do snort it.” “you can snort it or you can eat it, id recommend eating it.” “ok awesome what can i get with $50?” i can give you .5.” “is that a lot?” “yeah.” he hooks this guy up and he’s happy as can be. bassnectar is about to go on so i head back up into the crowd with Drake and Kent. they both have beers in their hands. “you guys finish that fifth?” “oh yeah, we finished that shit hours ago.” i laugh “nice guys nice.” bassnectar goes on and i start blowing up my balloons. Kent goes “oh dude give me some of those.” he blows one up and goes around giving the other ones to girls. such a player. bassnectar goes on and i have no idea whats going on I'm rolling so hard. my swaying dance move when my hair brushes against my face feels absolutely amazing. its indescribable how great this feels. before i know it bassnectar is over. fuck i thought it just started. he killed it though. i was really digging his set. bassnectar never disappoints. so thats it for the sanitarium stage. theres only one act left and its red hot chili peppers at the main stage. i honestly don’t give two shits about red hot chili peppers but Drake likes them and they’re playing a two hour set. im rolling really hard still and a fuckin fight breaks out right next to us. when you’re rolling the last thing you want to do it fight, cause you love everyone you don’t want to hurt them. 3 guys beat the shit out of one guy. i dont know what he did but these 3 guys are not happy with him. Drake and i decide to move. the red hot chili peppers are about to go on and i look to my left and see Ian and Sam. i couldn’t believe it. “what up guys! when the fuck did you guys get here?” i give Ian a hug then Sam. Sam is soaking wet. “why the fuck are you all wet.” “okay get this we just had to sneak in.” “oh shit really.” Sam says “yeah, we waited in that will call line for an hour and said fuck this.” i interrupt “the will call line is still long.” “yeah its complete bullshit, but get this. we had to cross a river to get to the festival. Ian is shimmying across this little ledge on the bridge. while me and Collin are up to our shoulders in this river walking across.” my jaw drops. “dam you guys are crazy! wheres Collin?” “he got tackled. but anyways so we get across miss muddy river, i ended up losing my shoes, and find an opening in the fence around the festival. but theres a security guard there. we tap her on her right shoulder and she looks to her right and the 3 of us book it! i turn around and i see Collin get tackled by this huge black guy. i make it to the crowd and i ask this guy, can i please have you're hoodie dude i just swam across a river to sneak in and they totally saw me i need to change my appearance. this guy thinks this is bad ass as fuck and gives me his hoodie. then we found you guys.” “okay that is the most bad ass story i have ever heard.” “yeah it was crazy. im freezing cold though and lost my shoes in the river.” im absolutely amazed by this story. red hot chili peppers goes on and i honestly don’t care at all. all im thinking about is how Ian and Sam snuck in to the festival. thats nuts. Miles ends up finding us. “dude that molly you’re cousins roommate gave me is really good dude and he gave me a half gram for $40. thank you so much!” “yeah hes a good guy he’s not going to rip you off.” red hot chili pepper is finally about to end. Kent asks if we’re going to the after party cause he has an extra ticket. my friends we’re going to some guy called baths. ive never heard of him before but i dont see my
friends that often anymore cause they all go to school and shit. so i decide to go with them to baths. Kent went to the after party with dillon francis, adventure club, and 12th planet. the festival ends and we start leaving. our hotel is only a mile down the road and the entire rest of the festival is taking buses. so we walk so we dont have to wait for the bus. we’re on our way back to the hotel and a bus drives by and someone yells “panda man!” Sam runs his hand through his hair. “did someone just yell panda man?” i laugh “yeah” “that is fuckin crazy dude! how many likes on facebook do you have now?” “around 2,000” “thats fuckin awesome dude.” we stop at a tubby’s to get some food. Drake and Ian go inside, Sam and i sit on a ledge outside. Sam cant go in because he doesn't have any shoes on. while Sam and i are stitting on this ledge this kid comes up to us, looked like he was 17 maybe 18 tops. “hey you guys got any heroin? ill trade you for some really good blow.” “no sorry dude we dont have any heroin.” “awe man really?” “sorry dude.” he left and i look at Sam. “dam dude, that kids like 17 he should not be fucking with heroin.” Drake and Ian come out and we tell them what just happened “dam thats fucked up, i hear detroit has really good heroin though.” Drake said. i say “i would have no idea, ive never done heroin, plan on doing heroin, or even know where to get heroin.” we continue our way to the hotel and meet up with Collin. i ask him “dude what happened.” he responds “okay they just put me in the back of a cop car and drove me out of the festival.” “thats it” “yeah luckily they didnt search me cause i have molly on me.” “you got lucky there.” “yeah i got tackled and fucked up my shoulder though.” i chuckle “yeah i heard about that.” we make it back to the hotel say bye to Kent and that we’ll see him tomorrow. Sam comes up to the hotel and puts on some shoes. then we head to the after party. im still rolling pretty hard. we get to the after party and this was not an after party. this was a joke. it was a guy on a piano. i put my hand on my forehead. “you’ve got to be kidding me, i should have went with Kent.” but whatever i wanted to be with my friends that i dont really get to see that often. luckily we showed up late and only caught like the last 20 or so minutes. but we ended up running into our friend Asher. he goes to school with Ian, Sam, and Collin. i say hi to him. he asks “what are you doing here?” i respond “i have no idea what im doing here.” he talks to the rest of the crew and all i can think of is Kent at the official after party. my roll ends quite quickly after listening to this pianist. so im ready to leave. luckily it ends pretty much right after i come down. we say bye to Asher and we leave. we get back to the hotel say bye to Sam and them. and i pass out almost immediately. we wake up in the morning around 11:00am. (today is my birthday. i turned 20. i get to be at a music festival on my birthday how dope is that?) the festival doesn’t start until 2:00pm so we go and get some lunch. we went to some bar near tigers stadium. there was a tigers game today so there were a lot of tigers jerseys being worn inside of the bar. Drake orders some big sandwich. i just order fries. i have celiac disease so i cant eat gluten or i get really sick, its basically like food poisoning, it sucks. i dont eat a
whole lot and pretty much live off of french fries, ice cream, and nachos all summer. we get our food. and shit, these fries are delicious. Drake agrees his sandwich is bomb as fuck too. we like this bar but have no idea what the name of it is. we head over to the bus stop to get on the shuttle that takes you to the festival after we finish our lunch. we get to the festival and run into our friend Parker from high school and his friend Charlie. we hang out with them for a while until the music starts. this was my first time meeting Charlie but i had spanish class with Parker. they ask us if we went to the after party last night. “no we went to some fuckin pianist, it sucked.” Drake agrees it was terrible. “aw man that sucks the after party was wild it went until 4 in the morning and datsik, borgore, and dirty phonics showed up, everyone was there! it was so sick.” i reply “fuck you dude thats sound so sick, fuckin i was rolling balls at a fuckin piano recital.” they laugh “yeah man that sucks.” 12th planet is about to go on in a half hour or so and i need to find some molly. im lookin around and txt my boy sean to see if he was going to be there. he unfortunately wasn’t. so im asking around looking for molly. i txt my cousin to see when him and his roommate are coming down. they were on the bus so they should be here shortly. i meet up with my cousin and his roommate and buy a gram off of him. cost me like 60 bucks. another great deal, grams usually go for around $70 or $80. 12th planet is about to go on and im finger dipping the fuck out of this molly bag. probably dipped through .3 or .4 in the matter of minutes. im ready to roll. 12th planet goes on. ive never seen 12th planet before so im pretty pumped to see him. im in like the middle of the crowd dancing enjoying life. i find a 21+ wristband on the ground. im like fuck yeah. i dont drink that often and have molly so i give it to a cute girl. i see Drake and Kent walking up to me. im thinking “fuck. i totally should have given that wristband to Drake.” but he had Kent to buy him drinks so its not that big of a deal. Kent and Drake chill with me for a while, they and myself are diggin 12th planet. im dancing, rolling really hard, just having a blast. I’m dancing through the crowd but still staying with Drake and Kent. my wandering is around a 2-3 yard radius. these two guys whip out a hacky sack. im really good at hacky sack but dont play because im rolling really hard. Kent and Drake play though. so they have a circle in the middle of the dance floor, with like 8 or 9 people playing hacky sack. thats fuckin awesome. they end up playing for like 2.5 hours. 12th planet ends and he stands on the DJ table “thank you orion, you guys were fuckin amazing!” everyone cheers. Drake and Kent are still playing hacky sack. 12th planet ends and adventure club is about to go on. i saw them at DEMF a few years ago and i want to see them again. i still haven’t gone pee so i go to try again, my bladder is extremely uncomfortable because i have to pee so bad. i make it to the porta potties, this one doesn’t smell as nice as the one yesterday. i still cant go, and im trying my hardest. im about to shit my pants im trying so hard. nothing. whatever i head back to the crowd to catch adventure club. they just went on. i go back to the middle of the crowd near the sack circle. “panda come play with us!” “no, no, no im rolling way to hard to play hacky sack.” “c’mon dude, we’re hammered drunk and doing just fine.” “okay.” i try and play hacky sack but
all i can think about is dancing. so i kick the sack maybe once and im out. so i dance and wander around meeting new people. life is good. adventure clubs set comes to an end and they killed it. i really enjoyed their set. Kent and Drake are still hammered drunk playing hacky sack. someone asks me if i can find them molly so i tell them to follow me. i go back to the grass to find my cousin and roommate. they were sitting in the grass again. “what up guys? you wanna help this guy out?” “yeah how much you lookin for?” the guy is looking for .4, .2 for him and .2 for his girlfriend. “is it good shit?” i look at him and nod my head. “its good.” i end up chilling with my cousin and roommate for a while during datsik. a couple of people recognize me and come sit down with us as well. “hey panda.” “what up guys?” they introduce themselves to my cousin, his roommate and i. they end up being pretty cool and chit chat with us for a minute. “dude i am diggin your pants.” i chuckle “thanks dude, they’re actually really comfortable too. have i given you guys a card?” “no, i want a card.” i handed them a card. they read it and they say “you’re fuckin awesome dude. these cards are sweet.” “yeah heres a few more, give them to a cute girl.” “oh for sure i will dude thanks.” he says this laughing. they leave and go do whatever it is they were about to do. Billy says “dude everyone knows you, i always ask people if they know you and they always do, i always tell them you’re my cousin. and they’re like no way!” i say “yeah its really taken off this past year or so.” Billy says “dude i know people that aren’t even in the scene that know you!” “really? thats nuts, dam. kind of cool though, i mean, im just a guy in a hat that was able to establish a name and fan base for himself.” “yeah dude its cool as fuck.” i tell them I'm about to go back and dance. ill catch them later. i get back into the crowd and theres Kent and Drake still playing hacky sack. its probably been an hour and half by now. “you guys are still playing.” Drake goes “yeah dude everyone in this circle is really good, its awesome. join us.” “no im good.” datsik ends and they’re still playing hacky sack. they played through half of 12th planets set, all of adventure clubs set, and all of datsiks set. thats awesome. but next is destroid. when destroid goes on they stop playing. destroid was the coolest thing i have ever seen. im roughly a gram deep, 10 pills. im rolling really hard but when destroid went on i couldn’t dance i just stood there and watched. it was the coolest thing. they get on stage and they have like robot-predator (the alien thing from the movies) costumes on that light up. they dont have a DJ booth they’re actually a band but electronic. instead of guitars they had guitar shaped midi pads, which is how they control the music, and a drummer. these guys are the coolest thing ive ever seen. they had lights that outlined their suits that changed colors from red to green it was awesome. so sick. right when they go on everyone, and i mean everyone including myself raise their phones and are either filming or taking pictures. i took a shit ton of pictures because this is the coolest thing ive ever seen. as dope as it was though there isn't much to say about it. i didn't do anything but stand there and watch the whole time. destroid ends and it was amazing. absolutely mind blowing. they were the last act for the sanitarium stage. up next is metallica to close out the festival. we head over to
metallica and we sit in the back. we dont give two shits about metallica. metallica goes on and we are not digging this so we say fuck it and leave after like 15 minutes. on our way leaving the festival this girl comes up to us. “panda! free pop up after party at The Mages Corner. Its datsik and 12th planet and goes til 4:00am” “okay fuck yeah, you guys wanna go to that?” Drake and Kent say “yeah lets fuckin go.” our legs are dead tired and we really dont feel like walking a mile. luckily Kent is a player. he goes and talks to this random girl for literally 10 minutes and she ends up giving us a ride to our hotel. we get in the car and Kent’s spittin his game at this girl and shes diggin it. hes making her laugh and smile. Kents a good guy. we’re guiding her to our hotel. “its just down the road about a mile on the left, there it is.” we get to the parking lot “shit we actually need to go to my car” Kent says. she laughs, smiles “okay.” Kent “goes yeah i totally knew that but wanted to spend more time with you.” i look at Drake and whisper under my breath/chuckle “dam.” she flirtingly hits him “oh stop it. okay where am i going.” Kent directs her to his car. we get to his car and say goodbye. Kent tells her “we’re going to an after party at The Mages Corner, you should come.” okay ill try.” “alright hopefuly ill see you there.” we get out of the car. Drake and i start laughing. “holy shit dude you talked to her for 10 minutes and got her to give us a ride across the city.” “yeah man she was a nice girl, i hope she actually goes to the after party.” we get in Kents car and i call shot gun. Drake sits in the back. someone calls Drake and they have an emotional conversation. i have no idea what they talked about but Drake starts crying. i have never seen Drake cry before and he's been my best friend for like 8 years. we ask if he just wants to go back to the hotel or if he wants to go to the after party. he decides to still go to the after party. we get to the venue and he’s feeling better. this guy comes out of the venue and comes and talks to me. “you are at everyone of our shows. can i get you’re information?” this ends up being Arthur the guy that runs the promotion company decibel that brings in most of the DJs and shows. so i gave him a card and we keep in touch via facebook. he hooks me up with free tickets sometimes and lets me hold contests to give away tickets. i post on twitter that there is a free after party with datsik and 12th planet. they end up playing back to back. which basically means they are playing together taking turns mixing songs. we head inside and chill in the lobby. Neil tweets me asking if its 18+ or not because hes only 17. i told him ‘i dont know but they didn’t check our IDs so you might be straight. he decides he's gonna risk it. good for him because they didn’t check and he got in. we go upstairs to the venue and theres another show going on so we just kinda chill and wait for it to end. it ends and i believe calico went on to open for datsik and 12th planet until more people showed up. we’re chillin and this kid comes up to me “oh my god are you detroit panda man?” “yeah thats me.” “okay i have to get a picture with you.” this kid ends up following me around all fuckin night wanting to take like a hundred pictures. i was getting annoyed. i dont mind taking pictures but you dont need 50 of them. he then tells me “you owe me dude,i made you famous.” “what? no, no, no. this whole panda man thing, this was me and only me, you didnt do shit.” “no dude i posted
you on my blog thats why you blew up.” “dude i have never seen you before and you did not post me on you’re blog i did all this shit myself.” i finally end up losing this kid, and he did not get a card. i talk to Neil and im like “yeah dude i haven’t peed in like 2 days, im getting a little worried.” “dam dude, yeah thats not good.” “nothing i can do about it though. ill just go to the doctor tomorrow.” Neil says “good idea.” i go to try and go to the bathroom again and i see Grace. i went and talked to her and found out her name was Grace. we ended up talking for like 10-15 minutes she's cool as fuck and she bumps her hair. she's absolutely gorgeous. i make it to the bathroom. and i still cant go. fuck. I’m extremely uncomfortable because i have to pee really bad. i get out of the bathroom and i see sean. i say “what up dude.” he asks if i need any molly. i buy a $40 sack. i get 4 pills. i eat them immediately then chill with sean for a bit. he’s my friend, i like sean. we wander around talking about the festival and what not. i tell him about destroid and how sick they were. 12th planet and datsik go on. everyones pumped. 12th planet asks on the mic “who just saw us at orion?” the crowd cheers. “who didn’t see us at orion?” the crowd cheers but not as loud. datsik and 12th planet start playing. and i go dance. i run into Tron. i was like “dude you look exactly like 12th planet.” “dude thats what everyone tells me! i dont think i do.” i say “no. you do dude, exactly like him.” i wander around the crowd and Drake is feeling better he's out dancing so thats good. i love Drake, i miss partying with him all the time. he was my wingman we went to every show together. so its like old times again. hell yeah. i see Kent dancing with this girl. beleive it or not it was the girl that gave us a ride to Kent’s car! i tap Drake “look she came, such a boss.” Drake laughs and we continue dancing. someone asks me for molly so i go and try and find sean. i end up finding him outside and tell him to talk to this guy. the kid buys .2 or 2 caps/pills (whatever you want to call them) sean thanks me. i chill with sean a little more and he has to leave i guess something came up. i tell him “alright ill catch you later dude.” “yeah, peace out.” i run into Mitch and Penelope. “oh fuck yeah guys whats up?” Mitch says “rolling face i found an e pill hook.” i say “oh shit nice dude, have you heard of chicago mints?” “yeah dude i wanna try one of those!” i tell Penelope “you should try and find some when you go to spring awakening.” she says “yeah im going too.” that kid comes back and wants more pictures. god dammit dude we’ve taken a shit ton already. but whatever i take another picture with him. he keeps insisting it was him that made me “famous” i roll my eyes at Mitch and Mitch laughs. finally the kid leaves and i tell Mitch “dude that kids annoying as fuck we’ve taken like 50 fuckin pictures and he keeps saying hes the reason panda man got so big.” “haha yeah that sucks.” its now like 2:00am Kent leaves with that girl and Drake wants to head back to the hotel. i want to stay so i go over to Mitch and see if he can give me a ride back to the hotel afterwards. he says he can. so i tell Drake “alright im gonna stay and my friend Mitch is going to give me a ride back to the hotel afterwards.” so we say goodbye and Drake leaves.
i run into Bailey, Heathers sister. she taps me on the shoulder and says “what up dude.” “not much wheres Heather i thought she loved datsik.” “i dont know she stayed home tonight for some reason.” i say “well thats lame, party pooper.” i think this is strange because Heather is not a party pooper. Heather parties harder than anyone i know. but whatever i guess she wasn’t feeling it tonight. the show ends up ending at 3:00am it was supposed to go until 4:00am but whatever it was free and they played for 3 hours so you really can’t complain. i find Mitch since hes my ride home. i run into that kid and he wants more pictures but his phone is dead so he asks Mitch to take pictures with his phone and send them to him. so we take like 3 more pictures. whatever i just want to leave its 3:00am and my legs are tired as fuck. we get in the Mitch’s car, its Mitch Penelope this kid i didnt know and myself, and honestly i have no idea how to get to my hotel from where we are at so we wing it. Mitch knows detroit pretty well. the only thing i knew is it was down the street from hart plaza where DEMF was. so i tell Mitch to drive to hart plaza. they’re smoking a blunt and ask if i want to hit it. “no im straight, i dont really like smoking weed to much anymore and especially not in the car because i get super paranoid. we get to hart plaza and i tell him “ok im pretty sure its that way.” so we go that way. i was right, about a mile or two down the road we find my hotel. i thank Mitch a lot for the ride. say good bye to everyone and up to my hotel room. i get in the room Drake is passed out sawing logs. i change my clothes and get ready for bed. i end up laying in bed all night staring at the wall because i couldn’t sleep. i dont know why, i was exhausted but couldn’t sleep so i just laid there thinking about everything. 6:00am rolls around and Drake kind of wakes up i say. “sup dude.” he does a half a sleep mumble “hey dude.” then goes right back to sleep. i continue thinking and staring at the wall. theres a little bit of light now coming through the window. im staring at this fire alarm thing on the wall and i kind of start hallucinating. the fire alarm thing starts like waving like waves are going across it. im like okay this is kind of cool i guess. gives me something to do until Drake wakes up. so i just stare at this thing until like 9:00am or 10:00am until Drake wakes up. im not sure why im hallucinating because i don’t fuck with hallucinogens. maybe its the lack of sleep. im honestly not sure but its not effecting me negatively so i dont really care. Drake wakes up around 9:30am he sees im already awake. “did you sleep last night.” i respond. “no, i dont know why, i just couldn’t sleep.” Drakes awake so i decide to take a shower. i didnt want to take one last night because Drake was sleeping. im in the bathroom and my hair is in knots from wearing my hat all day and night. so i have to brush my hair, there’s snarls everywhere. i get out of the shower and dammit i hate blowdrying my hair, its such a pain in the ass and i have long hair so takes forever to dry. ladies know how i feel. i end up saying fuck it and not blowdrying it. i just shake my head like a dog and dry it with a towel. Drake and i pack up all our shit and go to check out of the hotel. i still have my disco pants on and i have my hat resting on my shoulders. the guy at check out says “i meant to ask you if i could take a picture of you the other night but forgot. do you mind if
i take your picture now?” i laugh, Drake laughs. “yeah you can take my picture.” i put my hood on and smile. he snaps the pic. “thank you so much my wife is going to love you’re outfit. do you wear that everyday?” i chuckle. “no only to shows.” “oh you guys went to that thing on bele isle didn't you.” “yeah, it was really cool.” we then tell him about the will call line and how pissed people were, then check out and say good bye. we drive home and our bodies are exhausted. i still haven't slept but i feel fine. im not tired, crabby, or anything. we get back to my place and Drake drops me off. “thanks for the ride dude. i had a fuckin blast, i missed going to shows with you.” Drake says “yeah it was awesome, we’ll have to go again next year.” i walk inside and mom greets me with the news paper. “look is that you.” its my quote saying i was most excited to see destroid with detroit panda man written on it. every other person they quoted had a picture to go along with it. i didn’t get a picture. i guess im not special. “yeah thats me.” “so how was it?” it was a lot of fun. i then tell her all about it and the will call line. she said “yeah that was in the paper a lot of people were not happy with that will call line.” “no they weren’t.” i tell my mom i need to schedule a doctors appointment because i haven’t peed in 2 days. the doctor was able to squeeze me in at 1:30pm. and around 1:00 i finally pee. so the doctors appointment was a waste of time but i go anyway. i get to the doctors office and i tell them what was wrong and that i peed about a half hour ago and everything is fine. they still check for kidney stones and want a urine sample to test it. i got a little nervous for a second because i wasn’t sure what they were going to test and i ingested so much molly that weekend that could have been cut with shit its ridiculous. I ended up peeing in the cup and everything was fine. 48. molly is now dead. molly goes mainstream with Miley Cyrus and rappers now rapping about molly. everyone wants in on the molly game now. bathroom chemists are now making chemicals that are similar to molly but isn't molly. molly is now methylone, research chemicals, and anything else that is a white powder in a capsule. but the dealers tell you its molly so you still buy it. the effects are quite similar so you barely even notice if you bought molly or methylone. the next show is in a couple of days on wednesday. its bass mission. this bass mission was kind of lame because it rained so there was like no one there and it got moved inside. garret, John, Penelope and Mitch still showed up though so we just hung out with them all night. after bass mission on wednesday, on friday we had laidback luke. it was at the Bright City. Charlie was there, the kid that was friends with Parker that we met at orion. i end up chilling with him most of the night. i was on a mission to find molly first though. no one had any and sean was at spring awakening so im strugglin. Smalls says he’s coming though and he sells molly. so we wait for Smalls to show up. im kind of ansy, worried im not going to be able to roll tonight. but finally Smalls shows up. he shows up late, around 11:15pm but he shows up and it was great, like 6-7 people swarm him trying to get molly. right now he’s the only one in the club with molly. Smalls says “guys, guys, guys, i just got here give me a second. i dont want all these people swarming me.” so i
tell him “alright im going to go dance, find me.” about 15 minutes later Smalls comes up to me “hey due what do you need.” “thanks dude let me get a $40 sack” “okay here you go.” “thanks dude.” he hooks me up with .6, 6 pills. laidback luke goes on in like 20 minutes so i eat all 6 pills. i go and try and find Charlie and this guy comes up to me all excited “dude are you panda man!?” i chuckle “yeah i am.” “dude i have to get a picture with you, dude you’re a fuckin icon in the scene!” im thinking “an icon? dope im an icon now. i went from a guy in a hat to an icon.” not sure what to say to this so i say “hell yeah dude, here have a card.” hes ecstatic and we take our picture. “thank you so much dude.” “not a problem, party safe dude.” (i say this quite often “party safe.” its kind of hypocritical because i dont party safe at all, i put just about anything in my body if I'm told its molly. ive never overdosed or had any serious problems though so its whatever.) and i continue on my way to find Charlie. i find Charlie and right when i find Charlie the molly hits me. Charlie has never seen laidback luke before and asks what kind of music he plays i told him its house music. he asks me to describe house music. i have no idea how to describe it so i told him it kind of makes you jump. “okay dope im pumped.” laidback luke goes on shortly after our conversation. he goes on and hes killing it the crowd is jumping. so i must have described it right. about 10 minutes into his set Charlie goes to me “yeah dude this is dope i like this guy.” i say “jumping house music, i decribed it right?” “yeah you described it right.” Charlie is also rolling pretty hard so he's really feeling the music, not sure how much he took though. i end up chilling with Charlie the rest of the night. we actually become good friends, fast too. laidback luke ends and we had a blast. Charlie loved it. he’s a fan of house music now. he’s still relatively new to the scene. i asked Charlie “whatd you think?” “dude it was crazy, i couldn’t stop dancing or jumping.” i look at him with a grin on my face. “house music.” the next show is the following wednesday, bass mission. i dont go because electric forest starts on thursday and we needed to get up early. 49. thursday. electric forest day 1. i meet up with my friends from high school that we always go to electric forest with and a few others. we stay the night at Amy's and leave from her house in the morning. we pack the car and we’re ready to go. i don't bring a giant air mattress with me because the last 2 years it deflated on me. so this year i brought a tiny blow up mattress you can blow up yourself. so we pack all of our shit and we’re off to east lansing to pick up the rest of the crew. we get to east lansing and meet with Sam and a few of his friends. i think we had 6 or 7 cars in our train this year. so it was a decent sized group. bigger than last years. a lot better than last years too. i hated last years group(s). (the “s” is in parenthesis because it was more like 3 groups sharing our shit.) Sam ends up leading the way because he knows how to get there. on our way there we ended up losing one of our cars. luckily they had a GPS. they never end up catching back up to us but still end up camping with us. we’re behind Sam. its Amy, her boyfriend Alex, Drake and I.” we call Sam because one of his tail lights is out. theres
nothing we can do about it so we just make sure to stay behind Sam so a cop doesn't pull him over. well a cop does pull him over. we’re all really nervous because Sam had 2 full sheets of acid on him and whatever other drugs he brought with him and knowing Sam he was probably smoking multiple joints in the car. we keep driving though praying to god Sam plays it straight. about 20-30 minutes later Sam calls us. he wasn’t smoking joints and he was straight as fuck, he played it cool and the cop just gave him a ticket. what a relief. scary shit right there. thats multiple felonies. we pull into a gas station to wait for Sam to catch up to us. we’re all out of the car talking like thank god Sam played it straight. Sam finally shows up “we’re good guys!” we’re all like “fuck yeah!” we continue on our journey. we’re about an hour or so away from the festival. we finally reach the line of cars getting off the highway to go to the forest. we’re probably 2 or 3 miles away from the exit ramp then another mile away from the festival and once you get into the festival its roughly a 2 hour wait to get your car searched and shit. so we have along wait ahead of us. probably at least a 4 hour line. we dont care though we’re pumped for electric forest. a bunch of car are driving past us and cutting in line. im thinking why the fuck don’t we do that. but i dont say anything. and good thing because about 10 minutes later a cop flags us and a bunch of other cards down to follow him. he takes us to VIP entrance. theres no line what so ever. but we stil had to wait roughly an hour because none of the volunteers knew what was going on when all these cars showed up. finally they figure everything out and they searched our car. the last two years they opened our trunk and shut it. not this year. “you guys have anything illegal on you.” “no.” “ok have a good time.” and he drew a happy face on our car showing they searched it. fuck yeah. we get through the gates and are on our way to our camp site. our camp site was in the back but we got to skip a 4 hour line so we don’t give 2 shits that we’re in the back, and honestly it wasn’t even that far away from the festival maybe a 15-20 minute walk max. we set up camp fairly quickly. i tell everyone “alright I'm on a mission to find chicago mints.” i know ill be able to find them, its electric forest. fuck half the time the drugs find you from dealers coming to your tent. so im on a mission. i go around to each camp site asking if they have any mints. no one has any. fuck! took me about an hour but i found them. i asked this one camp site if they had any. “no but someone over there does.” someone over there. that helps a lot, theres tents everywhere. so i tell him “come show me ill buy you one.” “really?” “yeah lead the way.” “okay fuck yeah, i think she was over here.” took him about 5 minutes to recall where he saw the girl that had them. but we find her camp site. and she’s gone. her friends are there but she went off to do something. but they call her for us and she comes back. they were $20 a piece so i bought 11. 10 for me and my friends 1 for the guy that showed me where this girl was. “fuck yeah, thank you.” i get back to camp “fuck yeah guys i got them.” im pumped as hell to try these mints. they were blue. everyone is around camp just chilling wait for the festival gates to
open. this year i decide im going to be inside of the festival most the time. last year i chilled at the camp most of the day then came out at night. they start a joint rotation to pass the time. i dont smoke weed anymore so i just chill. i don’t know why i just kind of stopped smoking weed. so im sober during the day and roll at night. the gates finally open and i meet up with Heather. i told her about the mints and gave her a couple. we decided we we’re going to roll together during above and beyond on saturday. i hang out with Heather for a while then she goes back to camp and i chill in the festival and we’ll meet up again later. i decide to check out the forest because i heard they made the forest a lot bigger. so i wander around the forest. its huge a lot of cool art sculptures and designs. it was awesome. i end up in a hammock for most of the day. the hammocks are all over the forest and they’re very comfortable. dusk is approaching so i go to the ranch area which is basically like main stage to catch morgan page. i meet up with Drake first though. he has his molly i check to make sure i have my molly and my mints. i brought 2.5 grams of molly with me then i bought those mints when we got there. my schedule for tonight was supposed to be morgan page, then madeon, then i was supposed to catch rl grime for a little bit before Benny Benassi. so morgan page is about to go on so i pop one of those chicago mints. its been about 20 minutes and im still no feeling it. so i take a few dips out of my 2.5 bag. i get tapped on the shoulder and its the 16 year old (hes actually probably 17 by now but i still call him the 16 year old) im ecstatic to see him i introduce him to Drake and give him a dip. i starting to gradually feel my roll coming on. im getting jumpy and really excited. it doesn’t just hit you all at once like normal molly does, its gradual. about half way through morgan pages set I’m rolling harder than i have ever rolled before. I’m doing dance moves i never knew existed. im pullin some of these, doin some of those. im loving life. life is the greatest thing in the world and im in love. some clouds are starting to come in like it might rain. i dont give a shit though. not one shit is given by me. ill dance in the rain for all i care. thats how good im feeling because i hate the rain. actually apparently there was a storm this night but i had no idea. i thought it just sprinkled. morgan page ends and it does start raining. so Drake and i go sit under a tree. Drakes my best friend so i chill with him all night. i love Drake. under the tree we stayed some what dry. we just talked. we talked our hearts out. we had the deepest, realest conversation I've ever had. i don’t remember what it was though. we hear music start playing and madeon just went on. its still raining but not as hard so we go watch madeon. on our way through the crowd we run into the toledo crew. “oh what up guys!” “panda! its you!” i introduce them to Drake and Drake to them. we end up chilling with them for most of madeon. im peaking now. im so fucked up right now its ridiculous. Ryan from the toledo crew laughs at me “you alright dude, you look like you’re strugglin a little bit.” “no, not at all. i found chicago mints and i feel fucking fantastic.” Ryan laughs
“okay just makin sure.” madeon does alright. i think i liked him more at identity fest because he was only 17. now hes 18 so its not as cool and exciting. madeon ends and we were supposed to go catch part of RL grime at the tripolee stage before Benny Benassi. but we’re freezing cold, wet, and were both rolling. you tend to get really cold when you roll. so we go back under the tree and fill up our camelbaks. we talk about life and what not. im grinding my teeth like fuckin crazy. you’re supposed to chew gum when you roll because you grind your teeth. sometimes you’ll see kids with light up baby binkys, its so they don’t grind their teeth. Benny Benassi goes on so we head back to the stage area. i was strugglin pretty hard and the only thing i remember from Benny Benassi was when he dropped the skrillex remix of cinema. thats one of my favorite songs so i was pumped. Drake hates that song so i looked at him and smiled. thats all i remember from Benny Benassi and he eventually ends and we just wander around and hang for the rest of the festival. everyone is talking about RL Grimes set. i guess it ends up being like the best set of the weekend. i sigh, fuck. i forgot about RL Grime. but I’ve wanted to see Benny Benassi for years so i had to see him. and he killed it, but i guess not as much as RL Grime did. but i dont care i was with my best friend that i don't get to see as much anymore. so i was happy. Its now like 4:00am and the festival is over so we head back to camp. im still rolling really hard and its been like 6 or 7 hours. we get back to camp and our tent mates Bella, Amy, and Alex are already sleeping. so we try and be very quiet and crawl into our beds. im freezing cold so i snug up in a bunch of blankets and a sweatshirt and go to sleep. i slept like a baby. i had an air mattress that was literally maybe an inch thick if that thick. and i slept like a rock. i slept so good. those mints were crazy, just as i had been told. Heather txts me in the morning. “holy shit those mints.” i just smile cause i understand exactly what she’s talking about. Day 2, friday. we actually get to sleep in a little bit because its not scorching hot like it was the last 2 years. i wake up around 10:00am but just lay in the tent until around noonish. i was tired. finally get out of the tent and everyone was around camp just hanging out talking about the night before and who they’re most excited to see tonight. on my schedule was milkman, followed by baauer, then kill the noise, noisia, and krewella all on the tripolee stage. we’re hanging out at the camp and someone asked me how those mints were. i told them they were the most amazing thing in the world. i rolled for 6 or 7 hours straight with no come down what so ever. the molly come down sucks. it just disappears no hints what so ever, ok maybe theres a slight hint, just all of sudden you’re sober. so im a fan of these mints. these are great. Heather would agree. Ian and i decide to go walk around and get some lemonade. i got some yesterday and it was the best lemonade I've ever had. well worth the $5 that it cost. it was freshly squeezed not to sour not to sweet, it was perfect. we’re walking around the camp grounds looking for the lemonade stand and i could have sworn it was along the let side of the camp grounds next to the woods. but it was not there. a smoothie stand was there but god dammit i could have sworn yesterday it was a lemonade stand. so we end up
going to the main road of the campgrounds where all the vendor booths and food stands are. maybe one of the food stands will have the lemonade. which they do, perfect. we buy our lemonade and i finish mine before Ian could even get his it was so good. Ian finally gets his and decides its fuckin delicious and was worth the $5. we get back to camp and Ian lets Sam try the lemonade. Sam loves it. “see what’d i tell you the shits delicious.” Sam agrees that its amazing. everyone else wants to try it now. sorry Ian. everyone else also agrees its the best lemonade they have ever had. the festival gates open around noonish today i beleive. the first person i want to see is milkman at 6:30pm. milkman was my favorite at DEMF so seeing him is a must. i end up going into the festival just to walk around and do whatever around 3:00pm milkman goes on in 3.5 hours so we have time to do whatever. i decide im going to go to the ranch area and take a nap in the grass. i love sitting/laying in the grass so im happy as pigs in shit. i pass out for like 2 hours. i wake up to this girl building like a fort around me to give me shade so i dont get sun burn. what a beautiful person. i thank her and continue to lay there a little longer so her fort doesn't go to waste. i end up laying there for another half hour or so. i thank her for the shade, she smiles at me and waves. i gave her a card. milkman goes on in like 45 minutes so i start heading over to the tripolee stage and i run into Sophia and Gordon. Sophia i saw at DEMF but her boyfriend Gordon i haven’t seen in forever. they’re all dressed up looking like they just came out of the game candy land. i ask them “why are you guys all dressed up?” “we’re trying to win king and queen of electric forest.” “how do you do that?” “you have to find the king and queen and at the end of the festival they choose who was the most dressed up.” “thats awesome i hope you guy find them.” “thanks we’re trying! we’re going to keep looking for them.” “okay ill catch you guys later. good seeing you guys again!” “you too!” I start walking to the tripolee stage which is the first stage right when you get through the gates. the ranch stage is in the middle, which is where im coming from, the forest stage is in the forest, and the sherwood court is way in the back. i get to tripolee just in time for milkman. he gets on stage and tells us who he is and demolishes the turn tables. he had a great set. i don’t know which one i liked better though his DEMF set or his forest set. they were both good. after milkman was polish ambassador but i decided to go back to camp for a little bit to get some food and just relax. just as i get there Jeff, who rolled for his first time last year during Wolfgang Gartner, was leaving to see polish ambassador. i tell him “oh i just came from there.” Jeff leaves and now its only me at camp. so i decide to go back to the festival and ill just hang around. so i end up going to the forest to lay in a hammock. i get to the forest and i cant find a hammock to save my life. but i keep looking around. i finally see one in the distance but by the time i get to it its taken. rats! so i say fuck it and go back to tripolee. baauer should be going on soon. i start walking back to tripolee. i get to tripolee and this guy is tripping his balls off. he running around happy as can be yelling “i love life! i love life!” he then gets on the ground like hes praying still yelling “i love life.” i smile at him this guys having a blast. then his friend comes out of
nowhere and tackles him. the fuck you doin dude? he calls over the security guards to help him. the security guards come over like the fuck you want us to do? “hes super fucked up he needs to go to the hospital” so they’re trying to tie his hands together behind is back so they can strap him on a stretcher that they can then take him to the medical tent or where ever they were going to take him. while they’re tying him down he’s just yelling “its so good! its so good!” i assume he’s talking about the drugs he took. clearly they were amazing. they take him away on the stretcher in a golf cart. i go up to the security. “the fuck was that about? why did you take him away he was having the time of his life.” the security guard agrees and has no idea why his friend wanted him to be taken away. what an asshole friend. after all of this madness stops baauer goes on. i dont really feel like dancing and i haven’t taken my rolls yet so i just chill in the back laying down in the grass listening. i really enjoyed baauers set even though i was being lazy and just laying down in the back the entire time. after baauer i go to catch up with my friends at the ranch seeing the string cheese incident. they really like cheese i dont really like jam bands but i do enjoy some cheese. i like napping to cheese. so thats what i do, i take a nap to cheese until kill the noise comes on in a couple of hours. i dont actually fall asleep i just rest my eyes for a while. tonight the festival goes until 3:15am so i take my mint around 10:00pm so i roll for kill the noise, noisia, and krewella. its around 11:00pm and i head over to kill the noise. i get to the tripolee stage and its intermission in between clockwork and kill the noise. kill the noise goes on and the first thing he says into the mic “who is here with their best friend in the entire world?” i got a little teary eyed cause thats exactly who i was here with, Drake, my best friend in the entire world. he wasn’t with me during kill the noise but i was with him all night last night and it was just like old times. Drake and i used to do everything together. up until this past year i can’t remember doing something without him since like 9th grade. he was the only one that ever invited me to parties in high school. he was the only one that visited me in the hospital back in high school. Just about all my memories from the past 8 years are with Drake. Drake stuck by me through everything. i almost left to go find him but i knew i would never be able to since he didn’t have his phone on him. everyone cheers as the music starts. this entire set im not even listening to the music all im thinking about is my best friend in the entire world, Drake, and the rest of the crew. i about bawl my eyes out cause we’re slowing drifting apart as everyone goes away to school and goes about their lives. I used to see Drake just about every day. now i see him 2 or 3 times a month and its only for a couple hours at a time. kill the noise was an emotional set for me. after kill the noise is noisia. im pumped for noisia because i missed them at DEMF. they play drum n bass. which is very fast paced. i didn’t really like them it was too fast paced making it hard to dance to. so i sat against the sound booth. rolling but not nearly as hard as the day before. i sit here for their entire set just listening. i like listening to it, its just hard to dance too because its so fast paced. im not exactly sure
what exactly the average beat per minute is for drum n bass though. noisia ends and krewella is up next. i really like krewella. krewella goes on at 2:00am im still rolling but its not nearly as intense as it was yesterday. krewella goes on and about 10 minutes into their set they lost power. i dont know what actually happened but it was all back and silent for 5-10 minutes. i go to ask the person next to me if they knew what happened. i look to my left and its Greg! Kents brother “oh what up dude! i havnt seen you in forever!” Greg goes “ i know dude, its been forever! ive been standing here for like 15 minutes though waiting for you to notice me.” i give him a little nudge in the arm and smile “fuck you dude, great to see you again.” the music finally comes back on and this guy is wandering around the crowd with a bag of joints. there were probably 50-75 joints in this bag, and hes passing them out for free just asking for donations. Greg nudges me “you wanna smoke a joint.” im rolling “yeah ill smoke a joint.” Greg goes “yo dude ill take one.” “here you go. its free but ill gladly accept donations.” Greg throws him $5. what a great guy, passing out free joints. Greg goes “you got a lighter.” i shake my head “nope.” he asks the guy behind us “you got a lighter.” the guy behind us does. Greg asks if he wants to smoke a joint with us. and he does. this guy ends up being a huge festi (basically someone that goes to a bunch of festivals). this guy knows all the tips and tricks. i hit the joint and cough my fuckin lungs up. the festi asks if i want some water. my camelbak is running low so i accept. “damn dude your water is like freezing cold. where did you get the cold water at?” “i went up to the food booth threw them 5 bucks and asked if they could put ice in my camelbak.” “thats smart as fuck dude.” this guy knows all the tips and tricks. hes been going to festivals for like 10 years he said. krewella ends and they were sweet, but i thought they did better back in january, the last time i saw them. i say bye to Greg and go back to camp. i get back to camp and im the first one back. i sit in a chair and just relax. shortly after i sit down everyone else gets back. we talk about our nights and what not. they spark a joint and we just relax. it was a good night. Day 3, Saturday. we wake up around 6:00am because someone is banging on a pan yelling “lets go guys the party’s not over yet!” you hear like 6 people yell back at him “shut the fuck up!” eventually everyone falls back a sleep and doesnt end up waking up until around 9:00am so we got 3 more hours of sleep. we get up and hang out around camp. same old same old. spark a joint and chill. i end up sleeping and just laying around most of the day until i go into the festival. above and beyond is tonight. Heather and i are supposed to roll together for that show, so im looking forward to that. above and beyond plays trance music. i have no idea how to describe trance music, but i really like it. ive never seen a trance set live. i saw tiesto who used to play trance but now plays house. and i saw ferry corsten but he played a house set as well. so i have never experienced trance music live before. i end up laying around camp until around 6:30pm. i head to the festival. im waiting in line and these guys behind me ask if im panda man. i tell them yeah thats me. “dude we know your cousin jake, we went to high school with him.” i laugh, small world “thats awesome.” we continue to talk until we get through the gates. while were in line
this girl has a seizure. im not sure what caused it but probably drugs to be honest. everyone starts yelling for security. “move, move, move,” security rushes through the giant crowd of people trying to get to the girl. I’ve never seen someone up close have a seizure, she’s shaking and foaming at the mouth i almost throw up, i had to turn away. i was sick to my stomach. i felt so bad for her. i honestly don’t even know what happens when you have a seizure i just know they clearly aren’t a good sign. they take the girl to the medical tent. i look to the two kids next to me, i never got their names, “thats scary, i hope she’s alright.” we make it through the gates and i can hear the tripolee stage bumpin some beats that im diggin. i wait for those two kids “lets go check out the tripolee stage.” we head over to tripolee and its a trap DJ. this starts my love for trap music. the beats are dope and the lyrics are usually sampled from from rappers, and they’re so bad you can help but smile/laugh to yourself. “she got a big booty so i call her big booty” thats one of the samples. you smile because you’re basically laughing at these rappers that think they’re lyrical geniuses. this set is dope. i still don’t know who this is, and i have to pee really bad. but i dont want to miss any of this set. i end up staying for the whole thing i have to bee really bad so i dont do alot of dancing i do more rocking/swaying back and forth. his set comes to an end and he ends up being Nick Catchdubs. im definitely going to check him out when i get home. i head over to the bathrooms which are right across from the stage. im in the porta pottie and im reading this sign, it says “if used more than 250 times in a work week it is considered unsanitary.” i laugh. this thing probably gets used more than 250 times in a couple of hours. i go chill with my friends at cheese until 3lau comes on in an hour or so at the sherwood court stage. i lay in the grass listening to cheese. Jeff says he’s trying to roll i told him i had a mint left if he wanted it. he thinks about it then decides he wants it. im not a drug dealer so i give it to him for free. he says “no, no thats not fair.” so he trades me 3 caps of molly. fair enough, im not complaining. Jeff takes the mint and goes dancing. a lot of people are dancing. a lot of hippies. thats what i love about the forest. theres jam bands which draw in the hippies and theres also DJs that bring in the ravers. and all these hippies and ravers together is pure bliss. ravers are basically the new age hippies. so all around the most amazing vibes you’ll ever experience. perfect example; when the girl built me a fort so i wouldn’t get sun burned. i tell my friends peace out cause im going to try and catch 3lau. i get to the sherwood court stage and i lay in the back in the grass and just listen. you don’t have to be dancing to enjoy the music. especially on day 3 of a 4 day party in the woods. you get tired. i lay down for probably half of his set then go dance for the second half. i was really diggin 3lau. i decide to take my last mint because i gave my other one to Jeff. its only day 3 but for some reason i didn’t feel like rolling on the last day. so i dont really care that i gave it to Jeff, he’s my friend, i want him to have a good time. 3lau ends and i attempt to meet up with Heather. yeah good luck with that one. im fucked out of my mind on this mint, and she was probably more fucked up than i was.
so we dont end up rolling together for above and beyond but whatever no big deal. i end up meeting up with Drake and Jeff instead. we get pretty close to the stage, we’re a little off to the right side. above and beyond goes on and im rolling pretty hard but decide i want to roll even harder so i take those 3 caps Jeff traded me. above and beyond is sweet, they had the lyrics to their songs on the screen behind them so i was reading those a lot. they actually play a trance set. and its not really dancing music. its more listening and enjoying music. i dont know, but it definitely wasn’t my favorite set of the forest. i would still love to see tiesto play a trance set. about three quarters of the way through above and beyonds set Drake and Jeff go to catch empire of the sun i believe, i dont remember exactly, but they leave. so i wander around the crowd and run into Cooper, Cooper is the kandi kid i met at demf during milkman. “what up Cooper! did you catch milkman yesterday? he fuckin killed it!” “hell yeah i caught milkman!” i hang with Cooper for a bit then i continue wandering. im wandering through the crowd and i walk past this guy whose right in front of the sound booth. “are you the detroit panda man?” “thats me whats up?” “oh dude you have to smoke a bowl with me.” “alright im down lets smoke a bowl.” we sit down against the sound booth fence and we end up smoking like 6 bowls in like a half hour. im high as fuck and rolling my balls off. the weed intensified the roll by like 100. holy shit. i chill and talk to him for a bit, through the end of above and beyond and intermission. then knife party goes on and i tell him “alright im gonna go dance. ill catch you later, thanks for smoking with me.” “oh not a problem, ill catch you later panda.” i gave him a card and wandered on. i walking/dancing whatever the fuck im doing i have no idea. im so fucked up its ridiculous. and who do i fuckin see? Kent. i completely forget i saw him a few weeks ago at orion, and im ecstatic. i feel like i haven’t seen him in years. “what up Kent!” “sup panda?” hes tripping his balls on acid he said he took like 7 hits/tabs. so i hang with him the rest of the night. we check out knife party for a couple minutes. “wheres Drake?” “i think hes at a-trak at the tripolee stage.” “wanna go find him?” “yeah lets go find Drake.” we leave knife party and walk across the entire festival, tripolee is in the very front, sherwood court where we were at was in the very back. its roughly a 30 minute walk from one stage to the other. so we walk back to tripolee and we’re having a blast i have no idea what we were talking about but it was amazing i used to see Kent at almost every show and before orion i haven’t seen him in over a year. we arrive at tripolee and look for Drake, magically we find him. Drakes ecstatic him and Kent are good friends. we chill with Drake for a bit then decide we’re not digging a-trak and want to go back to knife party. another magical 30 minute walk across the festival and through the forest. i still have no idea what we talked about but the connection i felt with Kent was unreal. we end up getting lost in the forest for like 20 minutes. whatever we’re having a blast im rolling harder than i have ever rolled before and Kent is tripping harder than he ever has before. we make it out of the forest and arrive back at knife party. they just ended. “i guess we’re going back to a-trak.” “lets go!” another half hour walk through the forest and across the festival. still no idea what we talked about but we had the craziest
conversation ever. we make it to a-trak and we catch his last song and he closes out the festival that night. dam the last 2-2.5 hours of the festival i spent wandering around the festival fucked out of my mind with Kent. honestly it was the highlight of my forest. that was my favorite part. i haven’t seen Kent in forever and we were reunited by the magic of the forest. the music stops playing but apparently the festival was still open for another hour or so. so we go wander around the forest some more. i run into Jonny and his friend who i met at bass mission. i introduce them to Kent. all 4 of us are fucked out of our minds, we’re having a blast. i dont know where it came from but all of a sudden i remember the lemonade. “you guys have to try the freshly squeezed lemonade, its fuckin delicious.” all the stands are closed but the food booths are still open. we find one and i keep telling them how good the lemonade was, so they’re pumped to try it. they buy some lemonade and its not the same as i got before. this lemonade is awful. they try some. “isnt’ it good?” “oh yeah its delicious.” i ask to have some. i take a sip. “ oh no, this is not good. this is not the same lemonade i had earlier.” they respond “okay yeah its really not that good but you hyped it up so much we didn’t want to tell you we didn’t like it.” i say “okay guys promise me tomorrow you will buy some from one of the stands.” they respond “okay we will.” the festival closes and we have to head back to camp. i say goodbye and i head back to camp. its like 4:00am or 5:00am. i get back to camp and everyone is sleeping. im not that tired but im freezing cold from the mint and the molly so i go lay in bed and eventually fall a sleep. tonight was an amazing night holy shit. day 4, sunday. i wake up around 8:30am and im feeling great. im still rolling. oh fuck yeah. i didnt know you could wake up still rolling. i know ive woken up still high before but never rolling. so im feeling phenomenal. i end up rolling until like noon. thats awesome, i love mints. waking up rolling i decide that i do want to roll tonight. but im out of mints and money. luckily there is an ATM. i talk to Jackson one of the kids we came with. he has molly for sale. $10 a cap and there’s .15 in each cap. awesome. he really wants to get rid of them and doesnt want to bring any home so he hooks me up with 7 caps for $50. cant turn that down. i thank him. im exhausted its day 4 of pretty much non stop partying at electric forest. im having the time of my life though. nervo plays tonight. i love nervo. i fell in love with them when i saw them last year at the Bright City, when mim blew me a kiss. i made them a sign. they love when people hold up signs in the crowd so i made one that said “ i fuckin love nervo” but it was all pictures. and the name nervo was their logo/icon thing. so im excited to hold up my sign. they were playing at tripolee at 11:15pm unfortunately at the same time as pretty lights who is headlining the entire festival. i want to be front row for nervo i camp out at tripolee all day. i was there for like 4 or 5 hours with my sign in my camelbak. it worked out though because i ended up seeing le castle vania, who i love, and tommy trash, who i saw open for tiesto and he was dope too.
early in the day the stage wasn’t that packed so i didn’t have to worry about being up front. so i sat against the sound booth where i ran into Oracle one of the hippie ravers. she wasn't with Charm though. i talked to her for a while, shes really cool. i really like her voice if that isn’t weird. then she was off to go find her friends, i assumed Charm but i have no idea. once Oracle leaves the toledo crew stands in front of me off to the right a little bit. so i obviously have to go talk to them. “what up guys?” “oh panda! how you doin?” i told them “good.” Ryan asks “how was you’re madeon? you looked like you were strugglin pretty hard.” i smile “was definitely not strugglin, it was phenominal.” “you sure? cause you looked pretty fucked up.” “oh i was fucked out of my mind, but i was good.” i hang with them for a while until le castle vania goes on. whoever was on before him was pretty groovy and this one older woman, i dont want to call her a gradma, but she looked like she was well into her 70s, was dancing having a blast. i kept trying to film her but every time i went to record her she would stop. of course, that never fails. le castle vania goes on and i tell the toledo crew im going to work my way up to the front so i can hold up my sign for nervo. i work my way up to the front and it was relatively easy, there were a lot of people there but they were all spread out. so i made it to the front, checked my camelbak and i still had my sign. good. le castle vania just got signed to deadmau5’s record label mau5trap. which is awesome im really happy for him, he deserves it. so he played a lot of his new stuff and it was dirty. i was lovin it. dirty heavy electro. i love le castle vania. le castle vania ends and were stil waiting for nervo. tommy trash is up next. tommy trash kills it. he did a lot better this time than when he opened for tiesto. i popped 2 or 3 caps so i could get a little bit of a roll going for tommy trash. im rolling pretty hard enjoying the music and he plays this one song called reload. i dont know why but i completely stopped everything i was doing and had a flashback of the entire festival. Drake and i under the tree, smoking 6 bowls with that one guy against the sound booth, walking back and forth with Kent for 2-3 hours, getting to fucked up to find Heather, smoking a joint with Greg at krewella, all the cool people i met. all of this enters my mind. holy shit. i have no idea why im having this flashback but it was amazing i ended up getting the chills. no song has ever hit me like this before. it was the most magical thing i’ve ever experienced. this song is now my anthem to my 2013 electric forest. i still get the chills to this day when i listen to this song. tommy trash ends and i pop the other 4 or 5 caps of molly, each had .15 in them so i ended up taking around .7 all at once, and then that .3 or so about an hour before. so we’re feeling good. nervo finally goes on and i go to get out my sign and its gone. my heart drops, talk about a buzzkill. someone either took it out or it fell out. i look around and don’t see it on the ground anywhere or anyone holding it so i don’t know what happened to it. but im bummed so i say fuck it and go find my friends at pretty lights. i call Ian “yo im coming to pretty lights where are you.” “we’re a little in front of and to the left of the sound booth. look for the green laser.” “okay dope i see it, ill be there in a minute.” i work my way through the crowd and i shit ton of people end up recognizing me im working my way through the crowd “sup dude.” “what up” “what up” as i work my
way to Ian and and Drake. i finally make it to them and Ian’s tripping balls and Drakes fucked out of his mind on who knows what. “What up guys!?” “sup dude.” i look at Drake hes got this serious look on his face kind of moving his head forward and backwards kind of like a giraffe, his hands are in fists he’s kind of looking like he slightly pounding a drum. i put my arm on his shoulder “what up dude?” he goes “groove, just groove.” i fuckin love Drake. i dont know what the fuck im trying to do but Drakes tryin to groove. so i turn around and start talking to this girl behind me. her name is taylor she’s from chicago. shes really cool i end up talking to her the rest of the night. pretty lights ends and im still talking to taylor so we decide to try and catch the end of beats antique whose closing out the festival. im hoping they play an extended set like big gigantic did last year. Drake and Ian go back to the campsite. i tell them alright im going to chill with taylor for a bit and go to beats antique. we’re on our way to beats antique having a blast, her boyfriend doesn’t seem to like me very much but whatever sucks for him. we get to beats antique and they end pretty much right as we get there. im still rolling hard so im not trying to go back the campsite its the last day of electric forest. so i end up going back to her tent with her. we get there and try and light one of those chinese candle things, the ones that float in the air. we are very unsuccessful and almost start a fire. she decides shes going to bed so i say good bye and that it was nice meeting her, she tells me to put my number in her phone. her boyfriend doesn’t look happy. i tell her to txt me so i have her number. she does. im still rolling pretty hard and decide im going to buy some weed. i dont know why i don’t really smoke weed anymore but i buy some anyways, from a guy whose campsite was on the way to mine. its 4:00 am and i just bought 2 grams of weed that i intentionally plan to smoke all tonight. i start walking back to camp and im asking peope around if they have bowl and if they want to smoke some weed. i find these russian guys. cant understand a word they are saying, but they have a bowl with no weed. i have weed with no bowl. we’re like a jigsaw puzzle. we fit. so we end up smoking 3 or 4 bowls. i come down and im ready to go to bed. i tell the russians im out. i think they say bye I'm not sure they were hard to understand. i get back to camp and its like 5:00am Collin is still up so we smoke a bowl and go to bed. i don’t know why i bought this bag of weed at 4:00am i dont smoke weed and dont want to bring this home in the morning. so i leave it on one of the coolers for someone to find. early bird gets the worm. i go to bed and pass out immediately. in the morning everyone is very sluggish trying to pack everything so we can leave. a few people left last night but we decided to leave in the morning because we had bad experiences leaving at night. we get all our shit together and leave. we get back to Amys unpack all of our shit and i go home. im pretty tired. i get home and just lay around all day. my parents ask how it was i tell them amazing but we’ll talk about it more tomorrow. 9:00pm rolls around and im exhausted. so i go to bed. i fall asleep pretty quick. i have another crazy experience while in bed after the forest. in the middle of the night i just sat up with my legs crossed and kind of hunched over, for about a minute and
couldn’t move i was trying to lay back down but it was like i was stuck. then finally i laid back down and it felt like i was falling through a vortex. it was really weird it happened 2 or 3 time that night. it was the strangest thing. i woke up in the morning and txted Drake about it. he thought it was weird too. 50. the next show is entrance 2 which is actually more of a party than a show. its at the grime, where we saw le castle vania in 2011 during the snow storm. i want to go but i know like 3 or 4 friends whose cars have been broken into down there and one of them had their windows was shattered. so i dont want to drive my car down there. this one girl on twitter though her name is Zoe. she kept trying to get me to come down but i wouldn’t do it. my car is not getting broken into. so i end up not going. i should have gone though there were like 600 people there which is a lot for this venue, its actually a shit ton, usually on a good night theres around 300. this is a smaller venue so there doesn’t need to be thousands of people for it to be packed. we’re at roughly 2,200 “likes” on facebook 51. the next show is wednesday, bass mission. 2 days after electric forest. we’re pretty tired but we still go because i love bass mission. i get to bass mission pretty early, i usually get there around 10:00pm or 10:30pm Henry and Alice are already there because Henry works for the club and Alice is a promoter for it. so i chill with them and some of the other promoters. cookie and Ava. cookie tells me to call him cookie because he always wears something with cookie monster on it whether it be his hat or a shirt. something will have cookie monster on it. i become pretty good friends with cookie. Ava is more of a shy kind of quiet girl. shes cool though i like her, she has green hair, i think its awesome. i chill with them for a while, thank Henry for the guest list spot. i asked Henry and Alice how their forest was. they loved it. Henry tripped for his first time and had a bad trip at pretty lights though. i guess when everyone was throwing the glow sticks he thought it was a volcano erupting. so i can see why he would have been scared. but other than that they loved it. i chill with them for a bit then i go wander around. i end up finding sean and i buy a $40 sack. he gives me .4 or 4 caps. Garett txts me asking if i was going to bass mission tonight. i txt him back “im already here get down here.” Garett shows up about a half hour later. until then i chill with sean and run into Heather. the first thing she says to me “dude those mints you gave me were fuckin crazy.” i go “oh i know, i seriously rolled for 6-7 hours with no come down.” “i know! it was amazing, thank you so much.” she says. i laugh “you’re welcome.” garret shows up around 11:00pm same with John. their both looking for molly so i point them to sean. sean hooks them up. we pop our 4 caps and go dance. i run into Mitch and Penelope, they ask how forest was. i tell them it was amazing and that i found mints. i tell them how amazing these mints were. they’re jealous they wanted to go but couldn’t for some reason. but they definitely want to go next year. i introduce them to garret, John, and sean. we hang out for pretty much the rest of the night.
the show ends and its time to go home. another successful night. we’re at around 2,300 “likes” on facebook now. 52. the next show is datsik at the Bright City, its saturday. this is a huge show. its gonna be dope as fuck. it ends up selling out. this is the only time ive been to this club when it sells out. i luckily got my ticket early. its around 9:00pm and people on twitter are talking about how theres already a line when doors open at 9:30pm so i leave a little earlier than normal and i end up getting there around 9:30pm right when doors open. i park my car and get my molly out of the trunk. very rarely do i buy molly outside of a show but i wanted a gram so i got it a head of time. i put my molly in my pocket and go to get in line. some kids are standing in the parking lot asking if anyone has an extra ticket. i shook my head “sorry dude.” i go to get in line its almost around the corner. but i see Leo whose in like the middle of the line so i cut with him. they start letting people in and the line goes pretty quick because everyone already has tickets and its a club so they don’t search us. we’re inside in like 10 minutes. i get inside and see Mason. Mason has a spirithood as well. he’s the only person i know that has been to the biggest dance festival in the world tomorrowland in belgium. he says its crazy. i take a dip of my molly and i thought it tasted a little funny. i asked Mason about it, i told him to try it and tell me what he thinks. he tastes it. “no dude it tastes just like mine and mine is pure because i have a test kit.” ok sweet. just making sure. theres already a lot of people here. i wander around and socialize with people. im pumped for datsik. i end up running into my cousin Billy. hes like “we got a booth up stairs if you wanna chill with us.” i go up there. it was pretty cool. especially if you have a lot of friends that come you can just chill in the vip booth. my cousin tends to get booths often. i chill up there for a little bit then i go back down stairs. i run into Mitch and Penelope. i end up hanging out with them most of the night. i ask them where Heather is. she was outside strugglin. i go talk to her, she can barely stand. i guess she ended up drinking a bunch of alcohol and took a shit ton of molly. i already played nurse with her once i’m not doing that again. but we chill with her for a bit. then i go back inside. this one kid comes up to me “what up dude?” its Caleb. i went to high school with him. i was very surprised to see him here. i didn’t know he was into the rave scene. i actually had gym class with him my senior year of high school. i was going to ask if he wanted a dip of molly but i thought to myself. no, no way does this kid roll. the first opener ends and i take a couple of dips to get my roll going. i probably took around .5 at this point. i don’t remember exactly who the opener was but he was dope. the whole lineup for tonight was dope. it was a bangin show. at the time i thought it was going to be the best show of the summer. i wander around some more doing whatever the fuck im doing until datsik goes on. datsik goes on so i eat the rest of my molly. i end up with Mitch and Penelope again we’re chilling by the bar on the hand rails next to the sound booth. we chill here all
night doing more talking than dancing. but it was still a lot of fun. at this point i start rolling more for a social aspect rather than a dancing aspect. i really enjoy rolling balls and just talking to people. datsik ends and it was dope. i say bye and go to leave. im in the parking lot and this guy calls me over “panda!” i walk over there and its cola, i met him at michael woods. he tells me i should start coming to the grime. i told him i would but i know friends whose cars have been broken into. he goes“no, no they have a security guard now.” “oh, really? whens the next show down there?” he responds “next saturday.” “okay hell yeah, ill probably see you there.” we take a picture and i leave. i get home and go straight to bed. i had a blast like usual. 53. we chill until bass mission. on wednesday. i txt sean to see if hes going. hes not but he says he’ll meet me outside if i want. so we do that. we decide to get there around 10:00pm i get there at 9:50pm i hate being late for things. hes a drug dealer and if you’ve ever dealt with a drug dealer you know they are never on time. i hit up John while i wait to see if hes going to be there. he is, but hes waiting for his friend. sean ends up getting there around 10:30 i meet him down the street in front of a bank. i see John and hes with Caleb the kid from gym class. it turns out we’re all waiting on sean. he finally gets there and gives us our drugs. he walks with us a for a minute and we talk, he’s not just our dealer, he’s our friend. he tells us he has to be careful because the club security has their eye on him. i guess someone ratted him out so they took him to the back room and searched him at datsik. but they couldn’t find anything. i told him “shit dude, be careful.” he responds quite confidently “no im fine they wont catch me i just have to be careful.” he goes back to his car and the rest of us go inside. we get inside, well outside actually because its on the patio, and go chill in our spot in the back by the couches and tables. the whole bass mission crew is there; garret, John, Caleb, Mitch, Penelope, Heathers not there but she’s around here some where with her sister Maria, Henry, Alice, Aiden, Liam, usually sean but he’s laying low right now. and a couple others but this is the crew thats here pretty much every week. we all just hang out we might go dance for a few minutes but for the most part we’re hanging out in the back. this is how i hang out with people. instead of having them come over we meet at shows and just hang out. its fun. we’ve all become good friends because we party together week after week. if it wasn’t for shows and our mutual love for partying we wouldn’t know/be friends with each other. 54. the next day Ryan from the toledo crew hits me up “yo dude, are you going to youngsta tonight?” i respond “where at?” he txts back “the grime.” i remember cola telling me they have a security guard now so i txt him back “yeah, ill go.” “dope see you there.” i get to the grime around 11:30pm 12:00am i get inside and there isn’t a whole lot of people here but i meet up with the toledo crew and hang with them for a while. talk about our forest experience it was fun. i go to look for molly and i ask one person and hes got some. hell yeah. i buy .4 like usual.
i go outside on the patio and Grace gives me the point and smile. i almost didn’t recognize her because i haven’t seen her in like a month and she didn’t bump her hair but i realize its Grace and my face lights up. “what up Grace!” “hiiiii” we hang out the rest of the night. i really like Grace, i feel like we click, i can talk to her about anything. hanging out with her all night, it almost felt like she was a long lost best friend. we just clicked. it was amazing. i end up rolling pretty hard and just having a blast with Grace. it was great. we’d hang out on the patio and talk, go dance, then over to the bar we we’re all over together all night it was great. i introduced her to the toledo crew and we just hung out. i really like this girl. the show ends at like 4:00am and its time to go home. i give Grace a hug and get her number then i say bye to the toledo crew. 55. the next show is saturday, at the grime, the party cola told me about. i show up around 11:00pm and head inside. at this venue the party is on the patio. most of the time here you roll and hangout outside socializing. im at the point where i like to roll for a social aspect so this is perfect. im out there for 2 minutes talking to cola and this girl Hailey comes up to me. “hey you’re the panda man.” im already rolling pretty hard “yeah thats me. i just started coming here, i used to not come down here because i have a few friends whose cars have been broken into. but they have a security guard now.” “yeah they have a security guard now. but hey im glad you come down here now. im part of this promotion company and we’re throwing a party next saturday, you should come, i can put you and a +1 on the guest list.” “okay fuck yeah, ill come.” “sweet ill see you there.” i wander around the patio socializing some more and i run into Nolan the guy i met at DEMF with the green spirithood. he always tries to start a chant “Detroiiiiit pandaaaa man!” i never know what to say/do when he does this so i get a little embarrassed. but its funny. he does it every time. i talk to Nolan for a little bit then i go to sit down against the wall on this ledge everyone sits on. i sit next to this kid named Jayden. he asks if i want to smoke a bowl. remembering how much weed intensified my roll at the forest im totally down to smoke a bowl or two. Jayden is a real laidback guy, a total stoner hippie. we sit and chill for minute high as fuck fucked out of our minds laughing, talking, just having a good time. i go inside to dance for a little bit theres a good amount of people inside dancing but for the most part the party is on the patio. i meet one of the photographers taking pictures for the party, her name is waffles. i love waffles. waffles is a great name, and she is a real cool girl. we talk for a little bit, and she takes a picture. she hands me a card so i can find the photo online. we talk a little more and venture our way back outside on the patio. i run into minion. i met him at one of the bass missions, he’s just starting out as a DJ and he was playing his first set tonight. he goes on at 3:00am to 4:00am i tell him ill definitely stay to check it out. he tells me “yeah its going to be filthy. im really excited.” i tell him “hell yeah dude ill be there.” 3:00am rolls around and a bunch of people go into the front room to watch minion play. he does really well especially for it being his first set. im impressed, along with
everyone else. there were actually more people in the front room (the small stage) for his set than the back room (the main stage). minions set comes to an end and everyone congratulates him and tells him he did well. its now 4:00am im still rolling so i go wander around. i meet this girl she tells me her name is rave squirrel. this name fits perfect because she kind of looks like a squirrel. real nice girl, very happy cheery. i end up chilling with her until the night is over, which is around 5:00am i run into Noah. hes one of the promoters for the Bright City. i talk to him for a minute i tell him “dude this place is dope, i just started coming here. im getting kind of sick of Bright City though you know what i mean?” he responds “oh believe me i know what you mean, im a promoter there, im there every fuckin day.” we both agree this venue is much better. its now 5:00am and the party comes to an end. i talk to Hailey and tell her that her party was dope. she thanks me for coming out. its 5 in the morning and someone asks me if i can hook them up with a half gram. im thinking damn its 5 in the morning. what are you doing buying a half gram? the night is over.people are looking for an after party though. im thinking “its 5:00 in the morning the night is over, im not going to an after party.” so i went home. 56. bass mission is on wednesday. i show up to the Bright City around 10:00pm i walk inside and one of the security guards call out my name “yo panda.” i respond “hey what up dude.” he introduces himself as Will. “minion and i are throwing a field party out in (i dont remember the city but it was like 2 hours away) but you should come.” im thinking to myself no, im not driving 2 hours for a field party that may or may not be bangin. but i tell him “ill see if i can make it.” i go outside to find my bass mission family and they’re all already here even sean, and Caleb who i had gym class with. this is the first time I've seen him at bass mission but he quickly becomes part of the fam. i go to sean “you got any caps?” he says “yeah just hold on a sec i gotta be careful, they’re watching me.” i was like “oh shit okay.” so we swap goods very sneakily. i get the usual $40 sack and he hooks me up with .5 or 5 caps. “sweet thanks dude.” we’re socializing just hanging on the couches having a grand ol time. i go wander around a little bit and run into Noah. i talk to him for a while, he also sells molly and asks if i needed any “yeah sure let me get .2” so he hooks me up with .2, cost me 20 bucks. i pop his molly and I'm on my way. about an hour later i get really, really sad. i dont know why but i just want to bawl my eyes out. but i cant, like there were no tears in my body or something. im not feeling good. im sad and rolling. i didnt think you could do that. but apparently you can. so i go and sit down with Penelope back by the couches. i tell Penelope whats going on “i dont know Penelope im just really sad right now, like i dont know why. its weird.” “are you rolling?” i respond “yeah im rolling really hard but for some reason feel like crying. i just want to bawl my eyes out. but i can’t.” she asks “why can’t you.” “i dont know its like theres no tears in my body or something. its really strange.” she adds “that is strange.”
i end up chilling with Penelope on the couches the rest of the night. i want to bawl my eyes but i don’t want to talk about it anymore so Penelope and i talk about whatever else comes to our minds. bass mission ends and i go home. i say bye to everyone and i head home. i get home and go to bed, still wanting to bawl my eyes out. so i try crying but can’t do it. now im even more sad and confused. i finally end up falling a sleep. the beginning of tonight went well but the end was a disaster. 57. the next party was at the grime. i get there around 11:00pm. right when i get there i run into minion. he tells me about that field party Will was talking about. i tell him ill try and make it. “ill invite you to the event page on facebook.” “okay sounds good.” and i continue to enter the venue. i stop at the bar and get a water. then i head to the patio because thats where the parties at, its on the patio. i walk out there and i see Grace. i run up to her and give her a hug. she introduces me to her friend Maddy. “hi Maddy, im Steve.” “hi Steve, nice to meet you.” i end up hanging out with them all night bullshitting and just having a good time. but first i have to find some molly. i talk to the gas mask kid if he can find me molly. he’s got me. “here give me some money ill be right back.” i give him 60 bucks. he comes back with 6 pills. “sweet thanks dude.” i pop my molly and go find Grace and Maddy. Grace is smoking a ciGarette. i walk up to her “found my molly we’re good.” she laughs “okay, when im done with this ciGarette lets go dance.” “fuck yeah im down.” i go sit against the wall with Maddy until Grace is finished with her ciGarette. i talk to Maddy for a little bit, i look at her “Grace’s fuckin awesome, i really like Grace.” “yeah she talks about you all the time.” “thats awesome.” i change the subject with how dope the grime is. “the first time i came here i felt like i was in a heroin documentary.” “oh i know.” she agrees. i add “but once you get to know the people its awesome and the vibes are amazing.” Grace finishes her ciGarette and we go dance. there were’t a whole lot of people inside so we didn’t dance for to long. but it was still fun. we head back outside to the patio and this shorter girl with black hair comes up to me. she says “hi.” and goes to shake my hand. i give her a hug. she tells me “i’m Zoe. i talked to you on twitter about coming down here for entrance 2. “ooohhhh that was you? yeah i didn’t come down here because i didn’t want my car to get broken into but they have a security guard now, and i like this place.” she says “yeah this place is awesome, im glad you could make it.” Zoe becomes a good friend of mine, she always comes to me when she’s having relationship problems and i like to help her. i like when people come to me with their problems it makes me feel like they appreciate me as a friend. “okay i just wanted to introduce myself, ill catch you later.” i laugh “alright it was nice meeting you Zoe, ill see you around.” i go back to chill with Grace and Maddy. its around 3:00am now and they’re getting ready to leave. we hug and say good bye “alright ill catch you later.” a friendly “love you Grace!” “no i love you!” we bear hug. i give Maddy a hug and say good bye. “see you later Maddy, it was nice meeting you.” “you too!” they leave.
im still rolling pretty hard so i go sit on the ledge next to this kid Joe. we randomly start talking and some how got on the topic of chicago mints. hes like “dude i want to try a chicago mint so bad.” “i was like dude, i found them at the forest and it was the greatest thing in the world, 6-7 hour roll, no come down.” Joe says “yeah i hear they’re fuckin crazy.” i tell him what someone told me. “if you find them buy them immediately.” Joe says “oh believe me i will.” i end up chilling and talking to Joe for the rest of the night.” the night ends i start saying bye to everyone and go say by to minion. “next saturday, field party, be there!” “alright ill try!” i say bye to Joe and i leave. 58. wednesday is bass mission where i chill with my bass mission fam. i end up buying the usual $40 sack and just chill in the back with the bass mission fam. its always a good time but nothing too exciting happened. the next day is marty party and butch clancey in Middle Oak. Arthur the guy from decibel asked me if i wanted to hold a contest on facebook (we’re at like 2,600 “likes now”) to give a way 2 tickets to this show and then he would put me and a +1 on the guest list. so of course i did it. for the contest on facebook i asked “what was the best thing you’ve done at a show to help spread the love?” a bunch of people had really great stories so it was hard to decide which one was the best. but i ended up choosing the one about this guy who left a show an hour early to help this girl who was too fucked up get home. i ended up going to marty party and butch clancey with my friend Nate, who went to skrillex with me. we also met Charlie and a few of his friends there. i kept telling Charlie how Middle Oak was one of my favorite venues but i haven’t been there in forever. so Charlie is pumped because he's never been to this venue before. we get there and they don’t have the air on. they have 2 fans and thats it. its hot and humid as fuck in here. it was terrible. we meet up with Charlie. and now im trying to find some molly. sean doesn’t txt me back so i dont know if hes going to be here or not so i find it from someone else. it doesn’t take me long at all, like 5 minutes. i bought the usual $40 sack. he hooks me up with 4 caps. i put them in my pocket and go find Nate and Charlie. “you find you’re molly?” “yup.” im happy “that was fast.” “yeah i asked like 2 people.” sean finally txts me back “yeah im in line now.” i respond “alright let me know when you get inside.” he gets inside and calls me. so we meet up. i buy another $40 sack. he hooks me up with .5 or 5 pills. we chill for a minute. and then he’s off to find his girl. i go back to chill with Charlie and Nate. Charlie is not digging this venue because its so god damn hot and humid. we talk and complain about the air situation even though theres nothing we can do about it. i go up to the bar to get a water so i don’t over heat or get dehydrated. the bar tender hands me my water and takes my cap. i tell her “can i please have that cap its hot as fuck in here.” “are you the panda man?” “yeah thats me.” “okay only cause you’re
the panda man.” she hands me the cap. “thank you.” i thank her immensely and give her a card. i go back to Nate and Charlie and tell them im goingto go up closer to the front and dance for a bit. they stay back. i get down to the lowest level. and we dance. i end up walking into a huge group of “fans” we take pictures and dance for a minute. they’re all looking for molly. and ask if i know where she’s at. “yeah follow me.” i have a train of at least 8-10 people. i find sean, hes dancing with his girl. i awkwardly stand there until he notices me because i dont want to interrupt him. he notices me fairly quickly. i point to this huge train of people. all of these guys are looking, you wanna help them out?” he kind of tilts his head back “yeah.” im extremely hot up front so i step back. i don’t see Nate and Charlie so i just wander around. the floor is wet and slippery because its so hot and humid in here. so i start runnning and sliding like im on ice skates. it was fun but i almost fell once so that was enough of that. i pop the rest of my molly, so were like 9 pills deep now. we’re feeling good. i head back towards near the bar to go to the bathroom and i run into Heather. i talk to Heather for a minute, give her a hug and i go to the bathroom. theres a security guard in the bathroom. probably to make sure no one is selling drugs. i ask him “its hot as fuck in here dude. why don’t they have the air on?” he says “i don’t know but its hot in here and im pissed.” i go to the bathroom. i finish going to the bathroom and start walking down towards the dance floor. i run into Mitch and Penelope. Mitch and i are fading for some reason. we’re not as close as we were a few months ago. he doesn’t go to as many shows anymore for some reason, and we’re just kind of fading, it sucks. so seeing him was nice. i chill with them for a little bit, we complain some more about the air situation. it sucks because you can’t go outside to cool off since its summer its just as hot if not hotter outside than it was inside. but i show them my cap on my water bottle. “lucky how’d you get that?” i laugh “im special.” butch clancey goes on. i was actually more excited for him than marty party. so i go dance. im rolling really hard so im having fun. i try and go up front but its just too hot. i blow up some balloons and pass them out to some people around me. people really like the balloons, they were a good idea. butch clancey throws down a pretty sweet set. but honestly i think people were more concerned about the air situation than the music. everyone you talked to was complaining about the air. marty party goes on after butch clancey. i wander around a little bit and i see this girl siting on the stair hunched over clearly not doing well. i go talk to her to make sure shes ok. she says she’s fine but i sit next to her for a minute to make sure. she really looks like she’s struggling. i talk to her for a couple minutes she doesn’t really want to talk. so i gave her a card and left. she reads it and as I'm leaving, she thanks me. marty party ends and its like 12:30am. we want to go to an after party so we go to the grime. we get there around 1:30. we walk inside and i see Grace. fuck yes. i run up to Grace and give her a hug. i introduce her to Nate and Charlie. we go outside on the patio and just hang out. we have a blast she jokingly says shes going to marry me. i
smile “hell yeah, lets get married.” i tell her we should hang out sometime; walk to the movies or something. she says “lets get dinner.” i get all excited. “okay fuck yeah even better, lets get dinner.” we never ended up getting dinner, we tend to get really fucked up and make a bunch of plans together but never end up following through with them. the night comes to an end and we say our good byes. i say bye to Grace and give her a bear hug. i ask her “whats the next show you’re going to?” she wasn’t sure “alright well im sure ill see you around. love you Grace!” she laughs “i love you, get home same” find Charlie and Nate and we leave. 59. we get home and i can’t sleep. so this is day one of no sleep. its around august im not sure where exactly but we’re somewhere around the beginning of august. the next show was the following day which was friday. its DJ bl3nd i was looking forward to DJ bl3nd because i missed him last time he was here. he wears like a chuckie mask on stage. pretty cool i guess. im pretty tired i didn’t sleep last night but the partying does not stop simply because you’re tired. Charlie is really excited for DJ bl3nd. i end up meeting him there. i was pretty tired and didn’t feel like rolling so i was going to stay sober for this show. i get to the Bright City and its pretty packed. i meet up with Charlie and chill with him until DJ bl3nd goes on. i see the gas mask kid. i met him at the grime the first time i went back there once they got the security guard. i go talk to him and he has molly. last time he found me molly i rolled my face off so im not about to turn down this opportunity. i buy .4 or 4 pills. it costs me $40. i always start the night off with .4. DJ bl3nd goes on in like a half hour so i pop my pills. and im ready to party. the opener was my friend troublemakr the guy i met at bass mission with the green mohawk. Charlie asks who this is thats playing. i told him its my friend troublemakr. “dam, hes really good.” “yeah he is, ill tell him you said that.” Charlie laughs. DJ bl3nd goes on and i start rolling. i watch him for like 10-15 minutes. im not feeling his music. i just started rolling and i want to go socialize and talk to someone. so i head outside and see the gas mask kid. im rolling pretty hard and decide i want to go to the grime after this. so i buy 2 more pills. it cost me 20 bucks. im outside and dogfingaz is playing. i really like dogfingaz so im happy outside. i end up chilling outside the rest of the night. i run into Mitch and Penelope. they were against the wall just groovin having a good time. i hang out with them, im rolling pretty hard. Mitch decides he wants to roll so i point him to the gas mask kid. now Mitch is rolling. im not sure if Penelope was or not. i ask them “are you guys going to the grime after this?” they say “i dont know should we?” “ive never been there.” Penelope adds. “yeah you should, i love the grime.” they decide they’ll go. i run into Caleb the kid in my gym class. i ask if he’s going to the grime. “how much is it?” “im not sure, either $10 or $15” all he has is a $10. “dude if its $15 ill throw you five. go.” “really? thanks dude.” yeah i got you bro. its around 1:30 and im getting ready to go to the grime. i tell Mitch and Penelope im leaving. “alright we’ll meet you there.” i go and find Charlie ask if he wants to go. he
decides him, his brother, and his brothers friend will meet us there. i tell him “alright see you in a bit.” and i leave. once i sit in the car i realize how tired i am since i didn’t sleep last night. im on my way to the grime and my car speakers fuck up. there’s no music just the bass. i have subwoofers so all you hear is loud banging and rattling of my trunk. fuckin dammit dude. im rolling balls i just want to listen to some music. so end up just listening to the loud obnoxious bass but it makes my seat vibrate so it feels pretty cool and its kind of funny listening to just the bass. i get to the grime and its $10. hell yeah Caleb will be able to get in. so i txt him. i get inside and i see sean. he comes up to me. “dude thank you so much for marty party, dude you made me so much money that night, you brought me like 20 people.” i laugh at him “any time dude, your my friend i like you.” he throws me a couple pills as a thank you. i thank him. i think he threw me 3. so i pop them im now 9 pills deep. i walk around and run into garret. i really like garret. he hands me his bag of molly “here dude go in the bathroom and take as much as you feel is a fair amount.” “fuck yeah thanks dude.” i go to the bathroom, i only took a dip cause im already nearly a gram deep and its not mine. it was a decent size dip though, big enough to feel but not small enough to where its a waste. i walk out of the bathroom and go find garret to give him his molly back. i thank him and we go hang outside. Mitch and Penelope are out there. im thinking shit when did you guys get here you must have walked right by me. then i realized i was probably in the bath room. i go talk to Mitch and Penelope they’re sitting on the ledge against the wall. “so Penelope what do you think?” she's not a fan. she's kind of tweaked out and wants to leave. so they weren’t there very long. i tell her “i know how you feel, the first time i came here i thought it was dirty as fuck, which it is, but once you get to know the people, the vibes are amazing. you should definitely give it another shot.” she says “yeah i dont know im just tired i guess.” i give her a hug “alright ill see you guys later, get home safe.” Charlies crew finally shows up they’re more into the music so they go inside and dance. i stay outside and socialize for a little longer. Caleb shows up and chills with garret and i. garret introduces us to his friend Michael. ive met him before at bass mission and we’re friends but garret forgot cause he’s on who knows what. Caleb’s looking for molly “oh shit you roll dude!” “yeah i just started.” “hell yeah dude thats awesome. mollys the greatest drug in the world.” we all agree. we go find sean and Caleb buys some molly. i decide to go dance with Charlie and his crew for a bit. its like 3:30am now. Charlie goes “alright i guess they want to leave so we’re out of here.” i tell him “oh dude if you wanna stay i can give you a ride home, you live just around corner from me.” “oh, really dude? ill go tell them.” so Charlie stays and hangs with us. Charlie, Garret, Caleb, Michael, sean, and i dance in the front room for the rest of the night until 5:00am. the night ends and we all leave. Charlie and i get in the car and go home. Charlies rolling a little still i cant tell if im rolling or just extremely tired. its a quiet ride
home with my speakers being broken. but we finally get home Charlie thanks me for the ride and i go home. 60. i get home and lay in bed, im dead fucking tired i can barely feel my legs. but i have this problem, if i stay up til 5:00am i usually can’t sleep that night. so i end up staying awake all night. day 2 of no sleep. my cousin txts me in the morning, its now saturday, saying his friend is having a farm party for his and my cousins birthday. its going to be a rave he said. he invites me to the event page on facebook and its titles “project x farm party” 99 people were attending. im thinking okay project x? sure, yea right. but i tell him ill go. im so tired right now i feel weak. my bones feel like they’re hollow and my body has like the chills. these past 3 days i have put more drugs in my body than i have food. i lay around all day thinking about this party. he says its going to be a rave so im trying to decide if i want to wear my rave attire, my hat and disco pants or just normal clothes. i decide i will wear my rave attire. i don't plan on being at this party long maybe an hour or two, wish my cousin happy birthday and peace out. night comes and im on my way to this party. it was like a 45 minute drive. im tired so i stop at the bank and get some money and go to the gas station to buy 2 red bulls. these ought to keep me awake. im driving out there i had to bring my headphones so i could listen to music since my speakers were broken. i get to this party and the GPS says im here but theres a security guard asking me for $10 apparently you had to pay to park. he puts an x on my hand. i park my car and i call my cousin. “yeah i dont know where i am but i just had to pay to park.” Billy tells me “yea come to the back by the bond fire.” i get back there and wish him a happy birthday. i didn’t think i was going to know anyone here. i know just about everyone here. this is dope. im talking to people that went to my high school thinking “how the fuck do you guys know Billy?” this party is dope as fuck. this is a project x party holy fuck. they had a bond fire outside with a DJ. then there was like a basement type thing. but to get down there you had to have an X on your hand. there was a bouncer checking. im like holy fuck im definitely staying here longer than 2 hours. i get down stairs and theres a bar with like 3 kegs a bunch of liquor. they’re not fucking around. i scope out the basement theres beer pong a couple of couches a fuckin mini half pipe. lasers, black lights. this shit was a like a rave just as Billy said. its also like project X. this party is like the shit you see in the movies. next to the mini half pipe they had stand where DJs would play. this shit is ridiculous and the DJs aren’t just friends that have turn tables. the DJs that were playing i think there were 3 of them, are residents at the Bright City. im in awe right now. like fuck. this is the craziest house party ive ever been too. i dont go to a lot of house parties because the cops always show up. but this still tops the charts. im down stairs like holy fuck just checking everything out and i see Lily. i talk to her for a bit i tell her how impressed i am with this party. she agrees its dope as fuck. it turns out this is a giant molly party. fuck yeah, my kind of party. but fuck i should have brought more money, only if i had known. we’re at someones farm so they obviously
don’t have an ATM. but i had 60 bucks with me but i had to pay $10 to get in. so i have $50. i buy some molly, i bought a half gram .5. im out of money now. i take a couple of dips to get my roll going. theres probably 150-200 people here. its fuckin dope. im still amazed how sick this party is. i end up talking to this guy sorry. thats what he told me his name was. ive seen him around before, ive talked to him before. we sit down on one of the couches, im exhausted i haven’t slept in like 3 days im running on artifical energy; red bull and drugs, we talk he agrees this party is the best party he’s been to as well. he says “yeah fuck the Bright City dude, this is where its at.” i was like “yeah dude this is fuckin awesome, holy shit.” sorry says “yeah dude I’m candy flipping for the first time.” (candy flipping is when you take acid and molly together so you’re rolling and tripping) “oh yeah how you like it?” he goes “like it? i fuckin love it.” i laugh fuck yeah dude. i get up and go wander around to meet some new people. i end up talking to this girl Ella. i tell her “lets go sit down i haven’t slept since wednesday and i can barely feel my legs.” we go sit down on the couch. her boyfriend is one of the DJs playing tonight. she tells me about the nitrous bar she works at. “you should come down some time we’re open til 6am. i talked to you about it on facebook before.” i was like “oooooh okay i remember you. nice to meet you.” at this point in time i have never done nitrous. we talked for a while. then she got up to go somewhere. i stayed on the couch. im sitting on the couch and i find $20 in my pocket. i close my eyes and whisper to myself “fuck yes.” i go to find Billy’s roommate for more molly. i find him and he’s out. fuck. “go to the bar tell them i sent you and you’re looking for a $20 sack.” “okay fuck yeah thank you.” i head to the bar and Lily is there. i talk to her for a minute until the guy at the bar is done pouring drinks. “yo do you have any molly? Billy’s roommate told me to ask you.” he holds his finger up. “yeah give me a second.” i continue talking to Lily. the guy gives me some more molly, 2 pills. i head back outside to sit by the bond fire. and cool off. its a little warm down there. im at the bond fire dead fuckin tired. i chill out for a second and cool off. sorry is out there so i talk to sorry for a minute. hes trying to smoke some weed. “you wanna smoke some weed?” i say “yeah lets smoke some weed.” i wouldnt mind intensifying my roll a bit. sorry says “okay i have 10 bucks lets see if we can find some weed.” we go on a hunt for some weed. we wander around for probably a half hour asking people for weed. no one has any, all people have is molly. we head back down stairs and a bunch of people are dancing. so i join them “hey sorry, if you find some weed come find me.” sorry says “ i will.” i dance for a while having a blast, i take another dip. i have no idea how much ive taken but not too much i need this to last me all night, im out of money. sorry comes back to me. i ask “you find any?” he goes “no,no ones got any.” i say “fuck, what are we gonna do?” sorry doesnt know. someone comes down stairs saying the cops are here. im like oh fuck im not about to get caught with this shit. i dig into my pockets in panic mode struggling to get this bag of molly out of my pocket. took me like 30 seconds. 30 long seconds. i get it out and start eating it. sorry asks “you got
anything i can eat?” i hand him a pill just trying to get rid of everything. “yeah eat this.” he thanks me calm as can be not worried at all, im freaking out. i eat all the molly and throw the bag on the ground. im not getting caught with shit. so im good i have nothing on me i can relax now. i ate probably a half gram, .5, during this moment of panic. i start asking people why the cops are here. no one is quite sure. we’re in the middle of nowhere, there might have been one or two houses on the same road. so you wouldn’t think it was the neighbors but it could have been. everyones quiet. this one girl is freaking out “i cant get in trouble i have a warrant out for my arrest.” i look at her “well thats not good.” she’s panicking more than i was. and i dont blame her. “no its not, im so fucked.” i add “if you don’t have anything on you then you should be fine.” i sense a little bit of anger in her voice, probably because she’s scared out of her mind “no, i wont be fine, there is a warrant out for my arrest.” “alright im sorry then, i guess you’re fucked.” someone comes down stairs “cops are gone!” the party continues. no one knows why they came or why they left. its around 2:30am or 3:00am everyone is rolling hard as fuck now because everyone just ate their molly so they wouldn’t get in trouble. i give the scared girl a hug “you’re good! lets party.” shes pretty much out of breathe “i was so scared there for a second.” “yes i know you were, you got a little snappy with me when i was trying to help you feel more comfortable.” she laughs “ i know im sorry about that.” i tell her “apology accepted.” i find sorry “phew, that was a close one.” sorry is all smiles “yeah it was, thanks for that molly it really boosted my trip i was starting to come down.” i laugh and jokingly say “fuck you dude” sorry is no longer looking for some weed. he decides hes trying to find some more molly instead, he says if he finds any he’ll share with me. “okay dope find me, more than likely i will be on this couch.” this guy with a huge afro, Peter, comes up to me “whats up panda, why are you sitting down?” i tell him i haven’t slept since wednesday and i can barely feel my legs.” “oh shit really, since wednesday?” “yeah im so tired right now its ridiculous.” his girlfriend sits down next to me and starts talking to me. “ so whats it feel like being famous as the detroit panda man?” i laughed “famous?” “yeah dude, you’re a fuckin legend everyone knows you.” i tell her “honestly, i don’t feel famous at all. i just feel like a guy with a lot of friends. i mean im just a guy with a hat that anyone in the world can buy. but the best part is i can go to any show and know people there, and everyone is really nice to me.” she says “thats really cool.” we talk about block party, she asks if im going. i told her “hell yeah im going to block party thats about to be dope as hell.” “okay hopefully we’ll see you there.” then she leaves to dance. sorry comes back “i found some.” i get excited. “where is it?” “i ate it.” i laugh and look up at the ceiling “fuck you sorry.” i dont really care though. i would like to be rolling a little harder but its not that big of a deal i’ve taken so much molly these past few days its ridiculous. im still sitting on the couch, its like 5:00am and theres still a good 20-30 people dancing. but the party is starting to slowly die down. but theres still a good amount of people here im watching the people dance and im dancing through them. i dont feel like
getting off the couch because ive been awake for nearly 72 hours. so i just listen to the music and pretend im dancing with everyone. i use my imagination. the music stops playing around 5:30am. everyone starts leaving, im trying to find my cousin to wish him happy birthday and say good bye. i couldn’t find him so i sit by the bond fire for a minute. i start talking to this one kid, i don’t remember his name. we start making fun of the cops since they showed up to a giant molly party and had no idea about it. we laugh our asses off. i ask “why did they show up? she shrugs his shoulders “i dont know.” i ask “do you know why they left?” he shrugs his shoulders again. “no idea. but they did and thats all that matters.” one of the DJs that played tonight came up and started talking to me. i told him i was diggin his tunes. “thanks, im taylor, well robert, but call me taylor.” i say “okay, what up taylor? im Steve.” he tells me “yeah i see you at the Bright City a lot, i usually play on the patio.” i add “oh okay i’ve probably seen you then before.” “yeah ill be playing there for bass mission one of these weeks.” i say “okay ill definitely see you then. i fuckin love bass mission.” he pats me on the shoulder “hell yeah ill see you there.” then continues loading his truck. my cousin comes out from around the corner. “oh what up Billy, im about to get out of here. happy birthday, this party was fuckin ridiculous.” he thanks me “yeah we’re probably going to have another one, ill let you know.” i say “dope, peace out dude.” Billy thanks me for coming. its now like 6:00am and im driving home. im so tired its almost scary. i turn on my music so the obnoxious banging of just the bass keeps me awake. i get home and dad is getting ready to leave for golf. he says “late night?” “it was dope as fuck, but im going to bed im dead tired.” dad leaves for golf. this was the craziest party i have ever been to. it was definitely a “project x” party. i was only going to stay for an hour or two and ended up there until 6:00am. time to sleep. 61. groundfest is on monday which is this event minion started, its every monday at this metro park, its from 10am-10pm. a bunch of local DJs play and just hang out. i don’t go though because im still exhausted. i dont leave my bed for like 3 days i was so tired. wednesday rolls around and its bass mission. i meet up with my bass mission fam. and we party on the couches in the back. bass mission is my favorite because theres like 20 of us that are there every week and just hang out and have a good time. we dance, go sit down, dance some more, go sit back down. its a great time. thursday we have off then friday we start partying again. friday we end up at the grime. this is one of my favorite venues now. the party is always on the patio so i dont know what we’re going to do come winter when its cold out. we get there around 11:00 - 11:30. i walk outside on the patio and everyones here. the whole grime gang is here. i say hello to everyone and Mackenzie comes up to me. Mackenzie is a cool girl. she has a lot of energy and a very short attention span. so i don’t talk to her long but shes tripping on something, not sure what it was but she tells me shes a pandacorn. which is a mix between a panda and a unicorn. the panda part i
understand she has a panda hat similar to mine. the unicorn part, i have no idea. she tells me this then she runs off. i go say hi to everyone else and Penelope is back. i sit by Penelope. “you’re back i see.” “im back.” “im glad you gave it a second chance. what do you think so far?” “you were right. the people and vibes here are amazing. “told you, it takes 2 visits to understand. i thought the same thing when i came down here for my first time.” i see Caleb who i had gym class with, hes sitting down against the fence hittin it off with some girl. i give him the smile and nod. he flips me off. i laugh and say “fuck you dude!” then i leave him alone. i head inside to get a water and see if i can find molly. im successful. i buy a $40 sack and get 4 pills. i get my water then i eat the pills. back outside i go. i walk by Caleb, hes still hittin it off with that girl so i walk by him without looking at him and give him the thumbs up as i pass. i talk to minion. he’s hammered drunk and is telling me about that field party tomorrow, its called electric field and they changed the location. its now in the middle of detroit where the old tigers stadium was. i tell him “ok im probably going to go then.” he’s pumped “yeah dude tell everyone.” so i do, i tell a bunch of people except for i don’t have all the details so when i tell them, i tell them to go talk to minion. i talk to John about it and he’s really excited for it. he says “yeah dude im going, i think its going to be dope.” i ask him what time it starts. he says “it starts at 6pm and goes until everyone leaves or it gets shut down.” i say “thats awesome dude. im going to go.” John says “yeah you should it'll be a good time.” i end up finding sean and i buy 3 more pills. i eat them and talk to sean for a while. we talk about absolutely nothing. its basically me rambling on about whatever crosses my mind at the time. but i do tell him about the electric field party. he seems interested but doesn’t end up going. its around 4:00am i decide im going to leave so i can try and get some sleep, these past few weeks i haven’t been sleeping for days at a time. i say bye to everyone and i leave. i get home and still can’t sleep. 62. today is electric field. i didn’t sleep last night so i decide im going to get to electric field right when it starts before a bunch of people show up. im going to bring a blanket and hopefully take a short nap before its gets bumpin. it ends up raining all day so thats not going to happen. the rain stops around 4:00pm electric field starts at 6:00pm i no longer need to get there early because the grass i going to be wet. so i try and take a nap before electric fields. it doesn’t happen. i just end up laying in bed until 8:00pm then i decide to go to electric fields. i stop at the gas station and get a red bull so i have energy. this place doesn’t have an address so i cant put it in the GPS my only directions are its down the street from the grime. okay this helps a little but not a whole lot. i go to the grime and i call John. “John, where the fuck am i going.” John says “its just down the street and take a right.” i end up finding it after driving in 3 or 4 circles. i park on the side of this street and walk to the field. its like 8:30 and there are a good amount of people here. im impressed. i see Sophia and Gordon who i haven’t seen in a
while. they’re both tripping on acid. Sophia is hula hooping Gordon is dancing. i talk to them for a minute then go say hi to everyone else. minion and Will the two people that told me about this party were on the turn tables. i go say hi to them let them know i showed up. just about everyone is here. i go talk to Caleb from my gym class. he seems to really be into the music so i assume he’s rolling but i ask anyways. he points to his eyes. “do you see my eyes? do you see them? im fuckin rolling. took .4” i laugh out loud and look at his eyes. “oh shit dude you’re pupils are huge.” he nods his head. “yeah, im fuckin rollin.” i go talk to John for a bit. hes doing good, rolling as well. i talk to Nolan the guy with the green spirithood. Nolan tends to always be walking around. i’ve never seen him sit or stand for long. hes always walking around, wandering like a lost soul. hes a socializer, like me. Nolan’s a real nice guy, i really like Nolan. i meet lorand. i’ve seen him around before but never actually met him. lorand is one of the nicest, most laidback, peaceful guys I've ever met. i talk to lorand for a while and i like lorand. i go to dance some and around 10:00pm is when it got really bumpin there around 75-100 people there i would say. everyone is dancing having a good time. im dancing and Penelope comes up to me. im surprised to see her i i didn’t know she was coming. she introduces me to her sister Mia. Mias cool she has dreads. we talk for a minute and i ask her where Mitch is. “He’s at work.” i ask if hes coming afterwards. “i dont know i hope so.” call him tell him to get down here. about an hour later Mitch shows up. good. its now around 1:00am and theres still around 75-100 people here. its awesome. the news shows up. Owen, the guy i met at michael woods who gets mad bitches, comes up to me. he grabs me and says “come with me dude.” i was like alright. he brings me to the news reporter guy. he says to the news reporter “this is who you want to talk to, talk to this guy.” the news reporter says “okay come with me. we’re going to walk away from the event so the mic doesn’t pick up all the music.” im like okay. im a little nervous, i’ve never talked in front of a camera before on the spot. he hooked a mic up to my shirt and stood me in front of the camera with the the party behind me. he started asking me questions. he asked me what this was. i told him “this is what they call electric fields. its just a party a few of our friends put together.” he asked “how long have you guys been here? i told him “they’ve been here playing music since 6:00pm and we’ll be here until everyone gets tired and leaves” he asks “do you guys know each other?” i tell him “yeah we all go to a bunch of shows all the time and after seeing each other week after week we all became friends. i know just about everyone here and same with everyone else.” he asks one last question “what is it you guys do?”
i tell him. “we all just love electronic music, we party everywhere. if theres music we’re there partying. we party at clubs, venues, bars, warehouses, fields, parking lots, if there is electricity and music we’re there partying.” i end up rambling “we’ve all become good friends. we don’t care where you came from, we don’t care about your past, we don’t care what you look like. we’re not going to judge you. if you love the music and you love to dance you’re one of us. everyone is accepted here. its all about the coming together and love of the music. we show nothing but love for one another. if one of us are having a bad time, all of us are having a bad time. so everyone will try and make sure everyone else is having a good time. its all about the positive vibes. these are some of the nicest people ive met and i wouldn’t have met them if it wasn’t for electronic music.” the interview is over. i was a little nervous being on the spot but i think it went well. i ask him if its going to be on the news. he wasn’t sure yet it might be. i walked back to the party and a bunch of people we’re asking if it was going to be on the news. i told them “they weren’t sure yet, maybe.” the gas mask kid ends up going and talking to reporter and asks him if he would email him if its going to be on the news. i go back to dance for a little bit im still tired since i didn’t sleep last night. i end up leaving around 2:30am and there were still a good amount of people there. i say bye to everyone and i leave im dead tired. i get home and go to bed. i end up sleeping all day sunday and monday. so i still haven’t gone to groundfest. my mom comes in my room and asks if everything is alright because I've been sleeping a lot lately. i tell her i’ve just been really tired from staying out so late so often recently. i don’t dare tell i’ve been staying up 2-3 days at a time because i don’t want her getting suspicious about drug use. 63. the next show is the biggest rave of the year, meltdown 3, kennedy jones and hulk are headlining it. ive heard good things about meltdown but have never actually been to one. so im excited. i go with Nate and his friend flozzy. then we’re meeting Charlie and his car there. its flozzy’s first show. i tell him “dam dude your first show i going to be the biggest rave of the summer if not the year. you’re about to have a blast. there’s going to be 4 stages and 32 DJs all in one night.” he’s excited. he’s rolling for his first time too. we get there and security doesn’t even attempt to search us. they barely checked our tickets. we get inside and this is a rave. there’s a shit ton of lasers, a bunch of kids with light up gloves giving light shows, kids have light up toys, everyones dressed in bright clothing, a shit ton of kandi kids. this is fuckin awesome. i look at flozzy “welcome to the rave scene.” immediately i see the gas mask kid. i haven’t heard from sean if he’s coming or not so i bought a gram off the gas mask kid. it cost me 80 bucks. i thank him. i head to the bathroom and a guy is selling E pills he’s got them all. he had a bag of probably at least 50 of them, all different colors, red, green blue, you name it he had it. i’m like “dude, if you would have found me 5 minutes earlier i totally would have bought one, but i just bought a gram of molly.” i wash my hands and go back to meet up
with Nate and them. we wander around i wanna check out all the stages. there’s the main stage thats in the middle, that ones kind of hard to miss. then theres one in the far right corner. theres one in the far left corner on your way to the patio, and then the last one is on the patio. we end up on the patio because the party is always on the patio, i dont know why, maybe so people can smoke. i dont know, but we always end up on the patio. we hang out on the patio for a while and i pop a few pills. i have ten of them i took like 3. i see sean and talk to sean for a while a bunch of people are asking me for molly and since I'm with sean all i have to do is point at him. right off the bat like 6 kids ask me for molly and i tell them to talk to sean. sean hooks them up. wandering around the patio is getting a little more difficult as its becoming packed. i pop a few more pills. then a few more after that. im like 6 or 7 pills deep. party of the year we’re going hard as fuck. Nolan spots me and starts chanting his classic “deeetroiiiit pandaaaa maaaaan” go dammit Nolan. i never know what to do when he does this so i end up blushing and saying “what up Nolan” “not much how are you?” Nolan brought a light up laser gun that he pretends to shoot people with. we happen to be next to one of the photographers so we strike a pose of him shooting me with the laser gun and im leaning back pretending to get shot. it was actually a really cool picture. whoever this DJ is on the patio right now is killing it he’s got everyone groovin. Nates up close dancing so i go dance with him for a minute. i look to my right and rave squirrel is standing against the fence. i haven’t seen her in a while so i go talk to her. she has pink hair extensions in her blonde hair. i comment on them and show her all my feathers and hair wraps i have in mine. (i look like a total hippie without my hat on) she thinks they are cool. i talk to her for a minute. then go back and dance with Nate. i have no idea where flozzy went. hes around here somewhere i asked Nate what flozzy thought of the rave scene so far “oh flozzy fuckin loves it hes been here an hour and is having the time of his life, im pretty sure hes already rolling too.” i laugh and say “fuck yeah he is!” i go and try to my way back inside to find Charlie. on my way out of the patio 3 friends ask if i can find them molly. i tell them to come with me. they get all excited “yeah he can help us out.” i go inside and call sean to see where he’s at. hes at main stage so i head to main stage. i find him and ask him if he wants to help these kids out. he does and throws me 3 pills. we thank each other. i pop the pills, we’re now 10 pills deep and its not even 12:00am this rave goes until 4:00am. the group of friends thank me. i continue trying to find Charlie and no luck. i run into garret and Caleb from my gym class though. im pumped to see them they ask who im looking for i told them i was looking for my friend Charlie but now I'm just kind of wandering around. they wander with me. we chit chat and bullshit and end up back outside on the patio. i introduce them to Nate. Nate knows Caleb from my gym class, he's surprised to see him here. they talk for a minute then do whatever it is they do. i pop a few more pills we’re now 12 pills deep. im feeling amazing. im having the absolute time of my life. i see Smalls enter the patio. i rush my way over to him and say
hi. we talk for a couple minutes. i tell him to hold on a second and i get Nate. “Nate Smalls’ here” “oh really where?” Nate follows me. they talk for a while and im off again wandering around. its now like 12:30 i go to go back inside and as im going inside i run into Heather. “what up Heather?” i give her a little scratch on the head and continue walking. im rolling really hard i have very little idea of what im doing right now. Heather calls out “hey, do you know where mollys at?” i tell her to follow me. we go and find sean. she knows sean and sean hooks her up. im at main stage now and my cousin comes up to me. asks “what up dude?” i was like “oh fuck yeah dude you made it!” i say hi to his roommate and he asks me if i need any molly. i think yeah sure ill have some. “let me get a $30 sack.” he ends up hooking me up with a half gram, 5 pills. i go ahead and eat them all. 1.7 grams, 17 pills i have no idea what im doing anymore. im dancing hanging with my cousin and his roommate for minute and Billy gives me a few pieces of candy. “thanks dude.” its weed candy. hell yeah. i go wander around some more and 4 or 5 people are asking me for molly. “yup, follow me.” i go find sean he’s in the front at main stage still. i point to the train of people. he smile and nods his head. then hooks me up with 3 more pills. i save them for when kennedy jones goes on at 1:00am i go wander around some more. i end up outside and i see flozzy. hes with a girl. i ask him what he thinks. he says “ we’ll talk about it over a joint.” so we find Nate and smoke a joint. flozzy fuckin loves this he is having a fuckin ball. he asks when the next one is. Nate and i tell him. “the rave scene is fuckin amazing but we don’t want you to get let down, not every rave is like this, this just happens to be the biggest and craziest one of the year.” i hit the joint twice and im fucked out of my mind. i thank them for smoking a joint with me but i gotta get inside kennedy jones is about to go on. Nate joins me so flozzy finishes his joint with the girl he met. we get inside and i pop the last 3 of my pills. im on 2 grams, 20 pills of unknown chemicals from 3 different dealers not knowing if they could have a reaction, i put in my body. im so fucked up right now its ridiculous. im surprised i can still walk. we get to main stage and kennedy jones just went on. Nate wants to go to the front so i join him. the crowd is packed but theres still rom to move around and dance. this is perfect. we get up front and we finally find Charlie. Charlie asks “how you feelin?” “amazing, how are you feeling.” “same.” we dance for a while then i have to take a step back the bass hurts my chest and makes me feel like im going to puke. so i jump, dance and spin in circles my way around the crowd. im having so much fun right now i dont know what do with myself. hence me jumping and spinning in circles. i run into the toledo crew. im ecstatic im so happy to see them. we hang for a while and Ryan from the toledo crew sees im fucked out of my mind and asks if im alright. “i tell him yeah im just rolling really hard.” i feel amazing but apparently i looked like a zombie most of the night. i sure didn’t fee like a zombie though. Ryan says “alright just be careful with the molly you go to a shit ton of shows, more than anyone i know.” i tell him its straight. i start dancing around as if I'm in a field of daisies.
i go back up with my friends Nate and Charlie. i get up there and Nate and Charlie both agree kennedy jones is sick as fuck. he lays down a dirty set. i dance with them up there for a little bit but the bass hurts my chest again so i take a step back. we’re right in front of 100,000 watts of bass, its fuckin loud. i dance more in the middle of the crowd now doing whatever the fuck i was doing. Heather and her sister Maria come up to me and they chill with me for a minute. kennedy jones ends and we go back outside. i go outside and sit down for a minute. i need to relax for a second. its now like 2:30 and i hear someone say cops. im like fuck i look for Nate, flozzy and Charlie. so we can peace out of here. i see Heather sitting down. “Heather cops are here!” she gets up and gets the fuck out of there. i find everyone i came with and we leave. we’re all rolling really hard and dont want to go home yet. luckily there is an after party at this place called TK its a new club. its a nitrous bar. so we go there along with a lot of other people. we get there and there wasn’t a parking lot you just park on the side of the road. we’re in a really shady area of detroit. we get up to the doors and its $10 to get in. we walk inside and its a giant room with maybe one dim light. there’s a stage and a bar in the corner where you can buy balloons. i’ve never tried nitrous before but i give it a shot. why not? nitrous is laughing gas, it comes in a tank and they fill up balloons with the nitrous. you don’t buy balloons you buy tickets and then give the bartender the tickets and he’ll give you a balloon. its $5 a ticket or 6 for $20. obviously you do the 6 for $20 deal. i go up to wait in line and i see Smalls. i talk to Smalls while i wait in line. there was a pretty long line i tell Smalls i have never done nitrous before. he tries describing it to me. “everything sounds really funny.” ok that doesn’t sound to bad. i finally get up there and i get my 6 tickets i tell him to give me one balloon for now. i go back with my friends. Smalls comes with me. Smalls is telling me how to do it. you kind of inhale then exhale a couple times. i inhale once and hold it in. i have no idea what im doing. everything starts sounding funny Smalls was right. i feel wavy. so i get a little more daring and inhale then exhale 4 or 5 times. i suck in the balloon then i blow back out. i suck in and blow back out i do this as many times as possible. i start laughing really hard. nitrous is an indescribable feeling. the best way to describe it is a massive head rush with visuals. i “fish out” thats what its called when you’re on nitrous. im laughing my ass off and everyones talking to me sounding really weird so i laugh even harder. this lasts for about 20 or so seconds. it feels a lot longer though. i come back into reality and everyone is hovering over me asking if im okay. im laughing still “yeah im fine.” well i realize i fell over and was on the ground. i stand up and i have no idea what just happened. it was dope though. i decide i like nitrous. i go to get more balloons. i run into Garret and Henry. we go up and get more balloons. i get 3 more this time instead of just 1 that way i dont have to make as many trips to the bar. i go back to my friends around this pool table. a whole bunch of people were at this pool table. i decide im going to sit down this time so i don’t fall over. i give Smalls a balloon because he didn’t have any money so i share with him. “oh thanks dude, you didn’t have too.” i said “i want you to have fun.” i sit on the pool table and go to
fish out. i puff on the balloon until i literally cant anymore. everything starts sounding funny then i fish out, laugh my ass off i fall back so good thing i sat down, and let go of both of my balloons. im fishing out and im trying to figure out what is going on, like how do i describe this to someone. im fishing out and i figure it out i as im coming back into reality i repeat what was going through my head while i fished out. “what the fuck, what the fuck.” i keep repeating “thats it! what the fuck. thats what causes me to fish out, what the fuck.” i write this down in my phone. these are actual thoughts that were going through my head while fishing out i wrote them down. - “what the fuck turned into hahahahaha” “nitrous lets your subconcious take over your body.” “ my secret code to my subconscious mind is “what the fuck” too the death. is the next level of subconious after what the fuck, then hahahaha” “purple giraffes” “We look like circus animals blowing up balloons.” “i remember i remember that why i can’t remember.” “and then i can remember it then i can’t remember it.” “i life my hands then i can’t remember.” “i am the only one who understands myself.” i end up going through $140 in like 2 hours on balloons. we’re all out of money and its like 7:00 in the morning. so we leave. theres still a lot of people here when we leave. we walk outside and its light out we look around, we are in a really shady area of detroit. we should definitely not be here. like 50 yards down the road. is a neighborhood, if you want to even call it that. every other house was boarded up or vacant. theres weeds over growing everything. fences are half ripped down. i was a little nervous leaving. we get home and my parents are in the kitchen drinking coffee. fuck. im still so fucked up right now its ridiculous. i walk by them and try not to have a conversation with them they ask how my night was. i tell them “good im dead fuckin tired though. im going to bed.” i get in bed and honestly i thought i may not have woken up in the morning. the way i was laying in bed, my upper body was on my back and my legs were curled up next to me like in the fetal position and my arms are out to the side. i couldn’t feel a thing. my body was kind of tingly. i almost started txting people saying i love you. but if i did wake up i didn’t want to have to explain myself. so i took the risk and just went to sleep. i ended up waking up around 4:00pm
64. i finally make it to groundfest on monday. its at a metro park, its a free event you just have to pay $5 to get into the park. it goes from 10:00am until 10:00pm. i wasn’t going to go because its an hour away and it was raining all day but it eventually stopped raining so i went. people have been talking about it a lot lately so im pumped to see what its like. i get there around 7:30pm and there’s probably around 100 people here on a rainy day, so imagine a sunny day. i get there and people are in hammocks in trees.
people are dancing. people are playing frisbee, everyone is just hanging out having a good time enjoying the free music. it was dope. the first person i see is Zoe. she looks pissed. “whats your problem?” i ask her. her and her boyfriend i guess were in a fight. she ends up venting to me about it for a good 10 minutes then wanders off. i go wander around and talk to people, i see cola. colas talking to Nolan. they’re both tripping on shrooms. Nolan asked me how i liked nitrous. i told him “i fuckin loved it.” mike says “yeah you freaked everyone out when you fell over.” i say “yeah sorry about that it was my first time.” cola interrupts “you fell over!?” and laughs at me. he continues “dude the russians man, the russians have the best nitrous. you want good nitrous talk to the russians.” he talks about the russians to himself for like 10 minutes because Nolan and i stop listening.” we continue to talk about meltdown and the nitrous. we all agree meltdown was definitely party of the summer if not the year. it made the datsik party look like a joke. i go walk around and say hi to minion because he’s been telling me to come for a few weeks now. he’s happy to see me i tell him this is dope as fuck. he’s in the middle of playing a set so he can’t really talk right now. i go back to talk to cola again and he’s still going on about the russians. they must have really good nitrous. before i know it, its around 9:20pm and it ends. i thought it went until 10:00pm but i guess the park closes and everyone has to be gone by 10:00pm so they end it with enough time to pack everything up and leave. i head home and groundfest was dope, im definitely going every monday from now on. next monday rolls around and i decide im going to get there earlier today. so i get there around noon. i get there and there’s a good amount of people here already for how early it is. usually it doesnt get really bumpin until around 6:00pm once everyone gets off work, remember its a monday. groundfest is really cool. during the day its more like a family reunion/picnic we all know each other we’re a giant rave family. everyone we party with is here. people are laying in hammocks in the trees, playing catch, just hanging out. i get there and immediately see garret, this is garrets first groundfest. i talk to him and he likes it so far. he got here at 10:00am right when it started. next i see Heather. i go talk to Heather and she’s already downed a fifth. i chill and talk to Heather and garret for a while. theres still not a lot of people here but more than i thought would be for 12 o clock. Heather goes and runs off, who knows where she’s going or what she’s doing. its Heather you never know with her. garret and i go sit at this picnic table with a bunch of other people and Ben whips out a hookah. im so down to smoke hookah. we get it all set up and we have everything but the coals. dammit. Ben calls his friend whose on his way and tells him to pick up some coals on his way. so i sit down and talk to Joe. Mackenzie is standing dancing on top of the picnic table already. Mackenzie is a wild one. i chill here for about an hour just talking and kicking it with my friends waiting for the coals to show up. they finally show up and we can smoke the hookah. we smoke hookah and chill for like an hour. i decide to go check up on Heather. she’s struggling in the car. its like 1:30pm, i go check on her. i give her a hard time “alllll aboarrrrrrd, the strugge bus!” she flips me
off. i laugh i try and talk to her for a second on just a friendly level not giving her a hard time or anything but she doesn’t want talk she’s pretty fucked up. i decide im hungry so i go to my car and get some beef jerky. i bring some back to Heather. she’s not interested. so i leave her alone “im going to come check on you in a little bit, you hang in there.” i talk to Maria, her sister for a little bit when Caleb the kid from my gym class shows up. he joins our conversation. i reunite with Garret. he’s tripping now. so we go sit on the swings. we chill for a while on the swings and talk about his shirt. he spray painted it. its like a stencil of a dinosaur and says “rawr”. its a pretty cool shirt, especially since he made it. we hang out on the swings for probably a half hour. we meet this girl marz. she offers us some chewy sweetarts, they’re delicious. after we swing on the swings we decide to go back and check on Heather. she’s out of the car so thats good. she’s laying on a blanket and Garetts friend Michael and this girl he met at meltdown are taking care of her. so we tell Heather to hang in there and go wander around. its around 2:15pm theres probably around 150 people here now. i go to the bathroom and run into lorand. arms wide “what up lorand?” we give a bro hug and i continue to the bathroom. i get out of the bathroom and John shows up i go talk to John and say hello. he’s telling me the evolution of groundfest. hes been coming to groundfest since the first one. he said the first one there were only like 25-30 people here. now there’s like 200 people and its only around 3:00pm i go back to check on Heather and she’s sitting up now so thats good. i ask her if she wants some beef jerky now. she doesn’t, but i do. so i go back to the car and get some more. in the parking lot Nolan, garret, and a few other kids are skateboarding. i used to skateboard and i used to be pretty good. i ask if i can try. the trucks are really loose. i like tight trucks and i haven’t been on a skateboard in probably 5 or 6 years. i can barely stand on the thing. i try to do a trick and don’t even come close. but hey i tried. i get my beef jerky and drink some water. then i go back to the grass where everyone is at. i see Owen, the ladies man who gets bitches, just get out of his hammock i ask if he’s done using it, if i could lay in it for a little bit. he says yeah go ahead. being respectful of someone else's hammock i take off my shoes before getting in. wow this thing is comfortable. i love hammocks. i could lay in this all day. i lay in it for a good 20 to 30 minutes. then i feel like im over staying my welcome. so i tell Owen he can have his hammock back. its around 4:00pm now its its getting packed theres probably 250-300 people here. i find John i’m like holy shit dude look around look how many people are here when there were only 25-30 at the first one which was like 5 weeks ago. John said “yeah its pretty much doubled every week.” Caleb from gym class comes up to us. “guys look what i just bought. he shows us this pipe its like a claw. its really cool. i ask where he got it from. “theres a few vendors over there, they were selling pipes.” we go check them out. they had some pretty cool ones but the one Caleb bought was the coolest. he really wants to smoke out of it but
can’t for a few weeks until he’s off probation. i know what its like to get a new pipe and not be able to smoke out of it, it sucks. its like a tease. i tell him “fuck it dude smoke some tobacco out of it thats what its made for.” he laughs at me. “no seriously dude, do it, you can’t buy a brand new pipe and not test it out.” he tells me i’m right. and tests it out. he’s glad he did. “oh yeah, that hits nice you gotta try this, dam it hits hard.” i give it a try and he’s right it does hit pretty hard. he tells us “here dude if you want to smoke some weed out of it you can.” i tell him “thanks dude i don’t have any weed right now but if i find some ill come find you.” i go and find garret again. i find him and ask “how dope is this?” he says “dude this is dope as fuck.” we both look around “theres like what would you say? 400 people here.” i agree “somewhere around there.” i tell Garett what John told me “i guess the first groundfest there was only like 30 people here, now look at it.” theres people everywhere. we’re all friends too everyone here knows just about everyone. we see each other at shows all the time. it honestly feels like a giant family reunion. you see people you haven’t seen in a while its great. cola comes up to us “dude they’re selling pieces.” “yeah did you see the one Caleb bought?” we go check them out. cola ends up buying a chillum. cost him like $10 it was pretty cheap. i tell cola we gotta try out his new chillum. so we go looking for weed. we know Nolan has some we just have to find him. takes us about 20 minutes but we find him. i throw down $20 and cola throws down $20 mike hooks us up with like 4 grams of sour diesel. i tell cola “we’re smoking all of this by the way.” Cola says “i kind of want to take some home.” “alright take out what you want now and we’ll smoke the rest.” he takes out little more than half a gram. i tell him “alright lets find Caleb he just bought a dope new piece too and wants someone to test it out for him.” we find him and borrow his claw. we sit down and smoke the entire eighth in like an hour. we had a huge circle with like 3 or 4 bowls going around. everyone that walked by i asked if they wanted a hit. we pack bowl after bowl after bowl. we’re high as fuck. i start fishing out a little bit. thing start getting a little wavy. i noticed that after i tried nitrous other drugs give me slight nitrous effects. definitely not complaining. i give Caleb his piece back. cola Garett and i just start walking around high as fuck. cola informs us he’s rolling. “oh that sounds great.” so i go buy some rolls from Oliver. he’s talking to this girl whose trying to convince him to sell her drugs with coupons. shes like “okay, i have $4 dollars then these 2 half off camel cigarette coupons.” i burst out laughing i had to walk away, this is the funniest shit i’ve ever seen. this girl is trying to buy drugs with coupons. im almost in tears. if you’re buying drugs with coupons you might, just might have a problem. she walks away empty handed i go up to Oliver still laughing my ass off. “did she just try to buy drugs off you with coupons?” he goes “yeah, is she retarded? i dont even smoke. why would i want you’re cigarette coupons?” im still laughing “hey dude let me get a cap of molly.” he hooks me up. i go sit down on the bench with Garett and cola. i end up talking to this kid who calls himself scoobie. definitely does not look like he would be in the drug scene but he’s
telling me this story how he pretty much brought molly into detroit and that he was pushing heavy loads of it like 2 years ago. im very intrigued by his story. and want him to continue, but i see everyone running. i have no idea whats going on but i assume the cops are here or something and book it. i go see where everyone is going. a huge brawl breaks out. im the highest i have ever been in my life and i see his kid on the ground having a seizure. everyone is swinging, throwing punches, yelling, its fuckin crazy. i gasp holy shit, holy shit, the fuck is going on right now? i tweak the fuck out and leave. i fuckin leave. i get in my car and peace the fuck out. i drive to a mcdonalds down the street. and just sit in the parking lot drinking a pop to calm down. i try calling garret to see what happened. i guess these 5 bros showed up. no one had any idea who they were so why they we’re here who knows. i guess one of them tried to hit this girl so Ron stepped in and was like “the fuck are you doing dude?” the bro knocks ryan in to a seizure then all hell breaks loose. ryan was having a seizure and they we’re stlll trying to kick him. Will steps in. he’s one of the bouncers at the Bright City. he has pepper spray on him and sprays kids then throws a few punches to get them to back off. the cops show up, 2 ambulances, absolute madness. Ron ended up having to go to the hospital. the 5 kids try running and the entire groundfest fam chases them down. the cops finally get 3 of the kids, the other 2 got away for now. needless to say, that was the end of groundfest. 5 bros ended our weekly rave family reunion. groundfest was amazing. RIP. Will is going to law school so he tries to investigate who these guys were. he finds their facebook pages and they’re bragging about it. Will prints it out and takes it to the sheriffs office. but this, this is why we don’t like bros. now not all bros are bad, but you see my point. 65. the next show is on saturday, toadfest which is going to be a pretty big party at the grime. im looking forward to it. its saturday night and my family and i are about to go to dinner. i go to the bathroom before we leave, i pee blood and get really nausea. i dont say anything because i don’t want my parents to get suspicious of drug use, because im pretty sure its from the drugs. we get to dinner and we’re waiting for our name to be called. i feel like shit, and im nervous. so i tell them “i think i need to go to the hospital.” their faces light up in panic. “why, whats wrong?” i tell them i just peed blood and feel really sick. “okay lets go to the ER.” it happens to be right across the street. we get there and i feel awful. we wait in the waiting room for around 20 minutes. they finally call my name. the nurse takes my blood pressure and ask what brings me in the evening. i tell her. she asks if i use any recreational drugs. i tell her no. probably should have told her the truth but whatever. she takes me to my room and i put the gown thing on. my parents come back to keep me company. the doctor finally shows up after like an hour. he does his check up stuff, listens to my heart, “deep breath.” i tell him whats wrong he taps my sides. “did that hurt?” “no.” he thinks it might be a kidney stone but he’s not sure. so he runs an ultra sound. and one other test but i can’t remember what it was called. for some reason he didn’t want to
do x-rays because of radiation. they dont find anything from the tests they ran so they discharge me. i go home and go to bed. i was in the ER for like 4 hours. the next morning, its now sunday, i wake up in the most excruciating pain i have ever felt. i dont know how to describe it for girls but for guys, it felt like someone was stabbing me in the side and squeezing my nuts as hard as they could non stop. i have never been in so much pain in my life, i thought i was dying. i don’t know what to do besides cry. i bawl my eyes out until i get back to the hospital and they inject me with pain medicine. it took like an hour or so until i got to the hospital and got my pain medicine. Its a different doctor that treats me this time. he asks what brought me in this morning and i told him how much pain i was in. he thought it sounded like a kidney stone but was confused of why the ultra sound and the other test didn’t detect it. so he decides to do x-rays. i have to wait in my room for a good 45 minutes until the x-ray machine is available. im no longer in pain thanks to the pain medicine. its just uncomfortable now. finally the nurse wheels me down to the x-ray room. i lay on the table. “lay on your back please with you knees facing that way.” i do. “okay hold your breathe, 1, 2, 3,” the machine makes a noise. “okay you can breathe now.” she asks me to lay on my side. she aligns the machine up with where my kidneys are at. “okay hold your breathe, 1, 2, 3 and you can breathe. okay thats it. the doctor will bring the results back to your room.” she wheels me back to my room. the doctor comes back fairly quickly, maybe 20 minutes later. the doctor walks in the room with my x-rays in his hand. “okay it is a kidney stone like i thought. its a pretty big one 7mm, the average kidney stone is around 2mm and people said they feel like they’re dying so i could only imagine the pain you’re going through. it didn’t show up on the ultra sound because its in between your kidney and your bladder.” im thinking 7mm? thats huge. its like the size of a bb pellet. the doctor says “okay you’re not going to be able to pass this so you’re going to want to go to the urologist to have it surgically removed. there’s 2 ways they can remove it. they cant use a stint, or they can sonic blast it with sound waves to break it down so you can pass it. but before you go to the urologist you’re going to have to see your primary doctor for a referral.” the doctor prescribes me 500mg of Vicodin and they discharge me. of course its labor day weekend so the doctors aren’t open on monday. i have to wait until tuesday to see the doctor. im a little worried because excision is on wednesday and block party is on friday. i’ve been looking forawrd to both of these shows for months. i got my tickets on presale. monday im in a lot of pain but i have the Vicodin. the pain comes in waves, it hurts really bad for a little bit then it fades, then it comes back. monday was a long day, but its finally tuesday and i can see the doctor. i don’t know why i had to waste my time coming to my primary doctor and couldn’t just go to the urologist. i see my primary doctor for literally 10 minutes just so he can give me the referral. he understands im in a lot of pain and tells the urologist that its urgent and i need to see him immediately. the urologist squeezes me in that same day.
im at the urologist and theres probably 15 people in the waiting room. im thinking great im going to be here all day, he’s squeezing me in so i assumed all these people were in front of me. i check in and sit down. i feel like i have a lot of time to kill so i start downloading games on my phone. luckily for me though i only had to wait around 20 minutes. i thought for sure id be waiting for at least an hour. the nurse comes into the lobby and calls my name. she asks me all the standard questions, what brings you in today? i tell her i have a 7mm kidney stone. “thats no fun.” she finishes checking all my vitals and everything. “the doctor should be in shortly. while you’re waiting for him would you mind peeing in this cup?” i pee in the cup. there’s still blood in my urine, a lot too. i get nausea from seeing the blood. i get back to my room and lay down, the vicodin is helping tremendously. it no longer hurts it just feels kind of uncomfortable. the doctor comes in, real young guy, looked like he was 30 tops. he checks me out. “cough.” i hate doing the cough, that shits so uncomfortable. he talks to me about my options of removal. “we can insert a stint through your urethra and take it out that way or we can sonic blast it.” i tell him he can do the sonic blast. he describes to me what the sonic blast is and the whole history behind it. dude i don’t care just get this thing out of me. he tells me that the sonic blast has a 70%-80% success rate and if it doesn’t work we will have to use the stint method. im praying to god this works. but he does tell me, once its out you’ll feel back to normal immediately. this is good news. we discuss when we will plan the surgery. i told him “as soon as possible please.” wednesday and thursday he is on the other side of town at his other office and the next time he’ll be on this side of town is friday. my heart drops. i sigh, thats the same day as block party. we schedule the surgery for 2:00pm he tells me to arrive 2 hours early so they can check me in and get everything ready. i shake his hand and leave. he hands me a plastic urinal and a sand grater thing. “here go to the bathroom in this incase you do pass it.” i tell him i will. its wednesday and im not going to be able to make it to excision. im bummed, it was Heather's birthday and i wanted to see her and Grace. i txt my boy sean, i remember him saying he wanted to go at bass mission last week, and see if he had a ticket or not. he didn’t so i gave him mine. he greatly appreciated it. i told him why i couldn’t go and he felt sorry for me. thursday comes and im still in a lot of pain, ive been peeing in this urinal for the past day and it’s a huge pain in the ass and no stone is coming out. i lay in bed in pain pretty much all day. the pain is almost unbearable once the vicodin wears off, i immediately take another vicodin once the previous one wears off. it takes a good 15 to 20 minutes for the new vicodin to kick in. those are some long and painful minutes. finally its friday, block party. my surgery is at 2:00pm thats the same time block party starts. block party goes until 11:00pm and they just announced diplo is having an after party until 4:00am so im definitely trying to go to block party after this surgery, the doctor said once the kidney stone is removed i would feel better. we get to the hospital around noon to get checked in and everything. it did, it took almost 2 hours on the dot to get everything ready. they wheel me to a bed in the back and hook me up to an IV. i ask the nurse if she think’s ill be able to make it to a concert
that night. she laughs thinking im joking. she says “you’ll have to ask the doctor but i know you won’t be able to drive because of the anesthetics. but ask the doctor.” the doctor comes in and i ask him. he also laughs at me and says “no, you should not go to block party. you’ll need to rest.” my parents were in the room to hear him say this too. so im almost positive i wont be able to go to block party. that completely killed my mood. I'm bummed now. the nurse hooks me up with anesthetics im excited i want to go into la la land and get this surgery over with, im still going to try and make it to block party. fuck what the doctor said, ill just take it easy. i get really cold from the anesthetics and start to go into la la land. the nurse wheels me back to operating room. there’s a giant machine and they lay me on this table. thats all i remember. i wake up back in my room they had me in earlier. i was out for about an hour. the procedure took about 45 minutes. the nurse comes to check on me and tells me everything went well but we need to take more x-rays to make sure the surgery worked. she wheels me back to the x-ray room and takes x-rays. im still kind of out of it so she helps me get on the table and takes my x-rays. she wheels me back to my room and my parents are there. we wait about 10 minutes and the x-rays come back. the surgery worked. my parents ask me how i feel. “i feel great.” i said with a smile. they say “that machine was loud, we could hear it all the way in the lobby.” i ask if they were done with everything. they were but i needed to be under watch for the next hour to make sure everything was ok with the anesthetics and everything. an hour later they discharge me. we get home and i feel great. i feel 100% back to normal. its around 4:30pm and im trying to get to block party, hard. i ask my parents if i can go. they mom said no, dad who is really proud and supportive of the whole panda man thing. says “fuck it you can go.” my mom gives him this look “no the doctor said he needs to rest.” i tell her “mom i feel fine. the doctor said once it was gone i would feel 100% back to normal.” finally dad and i convince her to let me go. she says “fine but you cant drive because of the anesthetics. you have to find a ride there and back home.” i get the biggest smile on my face and start calling people. the only problem is its almost 5:00pm and everyone that i know is going is already there. my dad notices my determination and says he’ll drive me if i can find a ride home. “fuck yes, thank you dad!” i call garret. hes at block party and answers, im yelling into the phone so he can hear me. “dude if i find a ride to block party can you give me a ride home?” garret yells “what? i cant hear you” i repeat myself. he yells “yeah dude i totally got you!” he says to someone he’s with “panda mans coming. I'm on the phone with him right now.” i tell dad “lets go i found a ride home.” i throw on my rave outfit, my hat, and disco pants. and we’re off. block party is in the parking lot of the Bright City and the after party is at the Bright City. we get there and dad drops me off. “thanks dad. you’re the best.” i get out of the car and go call garret on my way to will call to pick up my ticket. he meets me at the entrance. at will call i run into Alice she’s surprised to see me since i had surgery just 4 hours ago. i tell her “yeah the doctor told me not to come but fuck him i feel fine and not about to miss block party over a simple kidney stone.”
i get my ticket and go meet garret. “what up dude! how’d your surgery go?” i tell him the same thing i told Alice. “hell yeah dude. you want a cap?” i tell him “no i have to stay sober tonight because of the anesthetics i don’t know how my body will react mixing the two drugs.” he says “oh you’re right good idea.” i get inside and see Maria and a few other people. they all ask me how my surgery went i tell them the same thing i told garret and Alice. they’re glad i made it. we wander around for a while talking to everyone, i sound like a broken record player telling everyone the same story. im on a mission to find Aubrey the bar tender. today is her last day then she’s moving across the state and i want to say bye. i never ended up finding her unfortunately. i find my friend Nate though. i hang with him for a while, him and Drake are moving to school next week. so i try and chill with Nate for a bit. im going to miss them. him and Drake are the only people i’m comfortable hanging out with since like junior year of high school. i don't know, im weird about hanging out with people. i turn my head and Nate disappears. oh well we’ll find him later. i end up finding the toledo crew. they’re ecstatic i made it. im just as happy to see them. i love the toledo crew. we talk about my surgery and how it went. “you’re a die hard dude. you’re a trooper.” i laugh. “no way am i missing block party dude, over a silly kidney stone? yeah right.” i ask them if they’re going to the diplo after party. they weren’t they were going to the one next door. “dam, you guys should have gone to the diplo one.” they wanted to see keys n krates though. it was good seeing them again i tell them im going to go wander im walking through the crowd and everyone is pumped to see me they’re all amazed that i came just 4 hours after my surgery. i see Alexa. the girl with dreads from bass mission. i haven’t seen her in a while so i was pumped to see her. we chilled and talked for a bit. she just moved into a new apartment so she hasn’t had the money to go to shows lately. i give her a hug tell her its nice to see her again and i continue wandering. dillion francis goes on. im pumped i thought i was going to miss him because he was supposed to go on earlier while i was still at the hospital but his plane got delayed. so i got to see him that was exciting, a nice surprise. i end up finding Nate again and chill with him for most of dillons set. dillon dropped his new song “without you.” garret showed me this song about a week ago and i love this song. i call garret and have to go find him. he was by the bathrooms i hurry my way over there. “dude! its that song.” hes like “oh fuck yeah” and we go up into the crowd. it ended up being his last song. after dillon was major lazer. i really like major lazers music but they have a hype man that always talks on the mic and its really annoying. it completely ruins the set. i chill with garret and we go sit against the fence with Nate. major lazer goes on and its terrible. the music is really good but the hype man completely ruins it. we only stayed for about 15 minutes then decided to go to the after party. Nate wasn’t going to the after party so i said bye to him and that ill still see him before he leaves. he asks “are you going to zedd?” “yeah ill be at zedd.” he says “dude its Megs 18th birthday and shes
getting a limo, you should come with us.” “okay fuck yeah ill totally go.” we say bye and give a bro hug. garret and i go to the after party. it doesn’t start until 11:00pm and its like 10:00pm right now and theres already a long line. we wait in line and chit chat for a bit. i thank garret again for giving me a ride home. i tell him “ill fill up your gas tank dude.” he thanks me. we get inside and i see sorry, the guy from the project x party. hes looking for molly. i told him my boy was in line and to wait a few minutes. sean gets inside and i tell him to talk to sorry. garret and i go outside on the patio and see taylor. the DJ i met at the project x party. we talk to him for a minute but he’s about to start DJing on the patio so we don’t talk long. we go sit on the couches in the back of the patio where we usually chill for bass mission. we chill there and talk. sean comes to sit down he chills with us. im talking to sean. “you probably made a shit ton of money tonight.” he ended up making a round 2 grand. i was like “holy shit dude thats crazy.” he had to go back to his car twice to empty money out of his pockets. Caleb from my gym class shows up. sean fronts him a bunch of molly. they talk business. i guess Caleb is going to sell molly at the after party next door. im thinking “dam be careful dude, he rolls for his first time a month later he’s selling.” i thought to myself. i nudge sean. “dam dude, you do realize you’re shits going around at two shows at the same time right now,right? thats fuckin awesome.” he smiles “yeah it is. i just sit back and collect the money.” i tell him “just be careful dude.” he says “oh no dude im fine, im so careful.” Garett and i go wander around some more. we meet this one guy. i never got his name but he’s tripping balls. garret says “dude so am i.” they talk for a good half hour about LSD. i go wander around some more and i meet this girl Kayla. she has a bunch of tattoos and is a model. she’s like a horror model, she takse photo shoots covered in blood. she shows me a picture. “that i the coolest thing i’ve ever seen.” we talk for a minute. then she wanders off. i end up talking to Emma, the shot girl. i like the shot girl. i talk to her at bass mission all the time. we chit chat but not for long its pretty packed in here and she has to sell shots. i wander back to garret and that one guy, and they’re still talking about tripping. i go to go sit back down with sean but some people took over our couch. so i go sit on the ground with garret and the other guy. i don’t know much about tripping because i don’t fuck with hallucinogens but i listen because what they are saying is interesting. diplo is about to go on so i tell them im going to go inside. i go inside and see my cousin Billy. his friend got a VIP booth, and Billy invites me in. i hang out with him for a while. i really like Billy. im glad we became closer from seeing each other at shows all the time. sitting down i see Oracle. one of the hippie ravers. i talk to her for a while. Billy passes us his G pen. a G pen is what you use to smoke hash oil which is pretty much pure THC i think. i hit it then pass it to Oracle, surprisingly she’s never hit a G pen before. so i showed her how to do it “hold this button down and inhale.” she does. G pens get you high as fuck. i talk to Oracle about weed. we both agree sativa is better than indica. sativa is a more energetic high. indica is a
more relaxed high. i tell her im going to go dance and it was nice seeing her again. i tell Billy ill be back later. i get out of the booth and diplo just went on. i run into flozzy whose first rave was meltdown 3. hes looking for molly. i tell him to come with me. im looking for sean and i see Caleb. “i thought you were next door selling?” “they kicked me out. there was a security guard in the bath room and he looked over the stall and saw me getting out molly. he told me i could either give him the drugs or he’d kick me out. i said fuck that you’re not getting my drugs, and left and came back here.” i was like “oh shit dude, you gotta be careful. but this guys looking for molly talk to him.” he bought .2. sean walks by and looks confused and comes up to us. he says” i thought you were next door.” Caleb says “i was but they kicked me out.” sean makes a surprised/mad face. “what!? you got kicked out?! sean isn’t so much mad as he is worried. Caleb “yeah sorry dude.” he then tells sean the story he just told me. sean tell him “alright dude just be fuckin careful.” flozzy thanks him. i go on to the dance floor and see Eli. Eli is really cool. i have no idea where i met him though. he’s not supposed to be here. he’s only 17 but has a fake id. i chill with him for a bit. he makes music and you can tell he’s a producer because he’s not really dancing he’s very intently listening to every part of the song. it was good seeing him. i see Lily and this guy is dancing with her and i can clearly tell she isn’t digging it. so i go right up to her while this guy is trying to dance with her and start talking to her. we talk and the guy leaves her alone. “i could tell you didn’t want to dance with that guy.” she smiles “thank you.” she’s friends with my cousin Billy. so i take her into his VIP booth so she can say hi. they talk for a while and i head back outside. im walking around and my friend Hunter, he works for insomniac who hosts music festivals such as EDC, comes up to me. “panda, if i can’t find this girl you’re coming back stage with me.” i say “okay fuck yeah.” right as i say this. someone comes up to me and asks for a picture “yeah ill take a picture.” he says “dude i cant believe you came after you’re surgery, thats dedication.” i smile “i love electronic music.” he thanks me. “dude you just made my night.” i laugh “thats awesome dude, hell yeah.” i turn around and Hunter is gone. i couldn’t find him anywhere. oh well, at least i made someones night. i head back inside and diplo is sweet, but honestly, i didn’t feel like i was at a show, i just felt like i was in a club. but it was still fun. diplo ends and everyone starts leaving. its only 3:00am and it goes until 4:00am the last hour was just local DJs. the patio was more bumping than the inside so i chilled outside. dogfingaz was playing and you could tell he was dead tired. he’s been at block party since 2:00pm so i dont blame him. i chill with Kayla for a little bit. but im getting tired. garret comes up to me and he’s tired too. we said our good byes and we left around 3:30am. garret gives me a ride home and i throw him $40 to fill his gas tank. we get to my place i thank him again and go to bed. tonight was a great night. im glad i went. thanks dad. The next morning i go on instagram and i see a video diplo posted. it was a video of Hunter singing the song started from the bottom now we’re here! i was like holy shit dude thats dope as fuck.
~ zedd comes to town and its Megs birthday. we all meet at Megs around 7:00pm. we hang out for a little bit. i wish her a happy birthday and thank her for letting me come with them. i talk to Nate most of the time because Nate has been one of my best friends since like 3rd or 4th grade. he lives like 6 houses down the street from me, and hes going away to school with Drake tomorrow. he’s really excited to move into their new apartment. i tell him “its going to be so dope.” the limo shows up and we get in. we end up drinking and smoking the whole way to zedd. im talking to Nate and he asks me if im rolling tonight. i told him “hell yeah im rolling tonight.” Nate pats me on the knee “just be careful dude, you don’t want to become a burn out.” this is the second time someone has talked to me about my drug use. first was Ryan at meltdown. i tell him i only roll at shows im straight. but what he said sticks in the back of my mind. we get to zedd and there’s a really long line around the corner, so we stay in the limo drinking until the line dies down. i don’t drink that often and i’m a light weight so im hammered drunk and high as fuck. we chill for probably an hour or so before we get in line. i honestly don’t remember waiting in line. we get inside, it was a sold out show but wasn’t that packed. there was plenty of room to dance it was great. i end up finding molly pretty quick. i bought .4. i pop my pills and im feeling great. this is my first time drunk rolling, holy shit its amazing. but you don’t remember shit. this guy Victor comes up to me and is looking for molly. i help him look. i like wandering around so it works out great. we talk and joke around looking for the guy i just bought from. Victor and i become friends. i find the guy with molly and tell him to talk to Victor. Victor buys .2. Victor ends up chilling with us for a while. zedd goes on and kills it. he drops this animals remix and its dirty as fuck. that was my favorite part of the show. Lily comes up to me and chills with us for a bit. im hammered drunk, rolling, and high as fuck. i have no idea whats going on right now. but im having a blast. im talking to Lily and we decide were going to go to a nitrous bar after this. i tell her “ok i came in a limo with my friends for her birthday and im hammered drunk. so i cant drive. could i give you my address and meet me at my house and then drive to the nitrous bar?” she’s down. she’ll do it. im surprised. “fuck yeah Lily you’re awesome! Nate comes up to me and tells me we have to leave. zedds set is only like half over. i guess they only rented the limo until 12:00am and it was now 12:30 am whoops. im fucked out of my mind so i don’t really care, whatever im down for anything right now. so i tell Lily we have to leave and to txt me the shows over so i can give her my address. i say bye to Victor and get his number. we go back to the limo and the driver is not happy. he drives us back to Megs then Nate gives me a ride home because im way to fucked up to drive. i get home and chill in my room until Lily txts me. she ended up txting me around 1:00am so we didn’t miss to much of the show. i give her my address and she comes over. she ends up getting here at like 1:30. im still fucked out of my mind. i get in the car and give her a hug. we go to the Shack. which is a much nicer nitrous bar than TK. TK you’re in there thinking to yourself “i should not be here right now.” the workers at the Shack are a lot
nicer too. at TK they’re money hungry, they just want you’re money. nitrous bars are 100% illegal by the way. we get to the Shack and there’s a good amount of people there. we go up to the bar and get tickets for balloons. its usually 6 tickets for $20 which is the going rate. sometimes they give you 7 tickets for $20 depending on how busy they are. but they hook me up with 9 tickets for $20 because they know me as the detroit panda man. i end up talking to T.Y who i met at the Bright City before, i don’t remember which show it was though. he’s one of the owners, real nice guy. he thanks me for coming out. i tell him how this place is a lot better than TK. he thanks me again. i go sit down with Lily so we can fish out. i have to sit or ill fall over, i tend to do that a lot. we fish out and i end up letting go of my balloons like always but we think its hysterical. we end up doing balloons until like 5:00am. we drive home both dead tired. we get back to my place i thank Lily for the ride, say bye, and give her a hug. she goes home and i go to bed. 66. the following saturday is loadstar and mantis. everyone is looking forward to this show. it’ll be a good one. i show up and meet most of the rave fam in the parking lot. garret parked right next to me actually. i buy 5 caps of molly from Joe. so does garret. the rave fam chills for a while in the parking lot before we go inside. we all eventually go inside. we get in and we end up on the patio. the party is always on the patio for some reason. we hang out there for a bit and socialize. i end up going back inside wandering around. i run into Maddy. i talk to Maddy for a bit. then Grace comes up and gives us a hug. im pumped to see Grace, i really like Grace, shes awesome. the 3 of us chill and groove for a bit. i pop my molly and we’re feelin good. Grace goes outside to smoke a cigarette, i end up staying inside dancing chilling with Maddy. Victor comes up to me. “what up dude?” im surprised to see him i completely forgot i told him about this show at zedd i chill with him for a bit and hes looking for molly. so we go on the patio to buy more molly. we walk by Grace i scratch her on the head and give her the point and smile. she smiles and points back. i tell this guy to talk to Victor. Victor buys .2. i end up buying .4 more. i pop them and now we’re feeing even better. mantis goes on. i go up and tell Grace because she really likes mantis. she says she’ll meet me in there when she’s done with her cigarette. i head inside and start dancing. Grace comes in and we dance for a bit. then end up going towards the back and talking and bullshitting just having a good time. we make more plans that we never follow through with. i showed her the tattoo on my hand. she laughs and says “we should get matching tattoos!” excitedly i respond “you want too!? fuck yeah lets get matching tattoos! what do you wanna get?” shes all giggly “lets get a heart and key.” im down for this. i say “okay you get the heart, ill get the key!” she says “yeah lets do it!” “when?” i ask. she says “next week!” sounds like a plan, hell yeah bout to get matching tattoos with Grace. i am so down. loadstar goes on. im pumped for loadstar but end up outside hanging out most of the time. Grace goes to meet up with Maddy and i head outside. i sit next to Nolan and
garret to chill with them for a while. Nolan asks if i want to hit his G pen. hell yeah i want to hit his G pen, to intensify my roll. i hit it and i get really, really sad again. i just want to bawl my eyes out. so i go back inside to hang with Grace. i go up to her “dam, i should not have smoked that weed.” she says “yeah i don’t like weed, why.” “yeah i don’t really smoke weed either anymore but it usually intensifies my roll but for some reason it made me really sad.” i just want to bawl my eyes right out. garret comes up to me and says a bunch of people are going to a tank party, which is a nitrous party. i tell him okay “im gonna chill here ill hit you up afterwards.” i chill with Grace the rest of the night. the night ends i give her a bear hug and tell her she should come to this tank party. she says she’ll ask Maddy. i say bye to Grace and Maddy and i go to the tank party. the GPS couldn’t find the road where this tank party was on so i had to call garret and he had to come find me. he gets in the car and we stop at the ATM to get money. we head back to the tank party and this is dope. there were probably 50 people with balloons in their mouths. people hanging in hammocks. it was great. it was very welcoming. unlike nitrous bars where its always dark. i end up buying 2 more caps of molly. then i head to the guy working the tank it was your standard 6 tickets for $20 or $50 for unlimited balloons. i got the unlimited balloons. i get my balloons and go sit down by garret. i tell him “dude this is dope as hell.” he gets excited “i know dude we have 4 tanks too!” i sit down “oh fuck yeah.” i go to fish out. im puffing on the balloon until i can’t anymore. i fish out and let go of my balloon as usual. i fish out and figure out whats happening. im starting to come back into reality “garret! i figured it out! i know why i let go of the balloons!” he laughs “why?” i respond “ok so basically there’s another world inside the balloon and im trying to bring that world into my world. there a bridge between the balloon and myself. when i let go of the balloon the bridge connects, i bring the balloon world into my world and then i fish out.” “dude! that makes perfect sense!” im excited as fuck “i know dude! i finally figured it out, that shit was driving me nuts!” we end up doing nitrous until like 7:00am it was great. a much better experience than at a nitrous bar. nitrous bars are shady. this was very welcoming. the tanks are all out and i say bye to everyone. 67. i get home and go to bed. i wake up in the morning like fuck, i took 2 caps at that kids loft party. i had one rule when i started using molly. if i ever used it outside of a show i would tell someone. so i txt Drake. “dude i promised myself if i ever used molly outside of a show i would tell someone. so this is me telling someone.” this is what he says: “well that is ironic that you’ve brought that up. ive been meaning to talk to you about all the drugs you’ve been doing. i figured out by your attitude and how you present yourself. i could see changes in you. for example you seem to have lost interest in tie dye. Nate, Austin and i have also talked about it. thinking that you should stop going to shows for at least a month. they’re fun and all but its obvious that the temptations are to much for
you. also its very unhealthy activity not only for your body but for your mind. after a while that substance will start to really slow you down. i agreed with him he was right. i decide im done going to shows for a while. i now have no job, i have no money, my only 2 friends just moved. im now depressed.
afterwards: i start listening to songs that first got me into the scene before the drug use. and this is what i fell in love with, the music. im the biggest dance music fan in detroit. i eat, sleep, live, and breathe electronic music. i cant just give that up. but i can give up the drugs. i end up rolling one last time, and took a gram im really depressed and talk to Grace about it. i open my heart to her i tell her everything thats been going on and through my head. it turns out she is having problems of her own that she talks to me about. we both help each other out now. Grace ends up being the only one trying to help me with my drug problem. for the next month or so i only go to shows that she’s going to because i know i wont roll if she’s there or ill feel bad. i end up becoming friends with detroitmau5 who soon becomes detroit kryo, which is a giant light up robot with lasers, nitrogen, and fire works. hes trying to help me get a deal going so i can get paid for my first show. my next stock market class is in a month. my cousin Billy and i start hanging out. my parents have no idea about any of this, they think i was sober the entire time. i dont know if i want to tell them about this book or not. rave squirrel starts a new trend. there is now rave skunk, rave hound, monstercat, and ravefly
2 other detroit “rave icons” show up; raving gumby and silky slender or silky slim (i dont remember exactly)
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