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Tuesday, November 19, 2013
Man feels brother held hostage by bipolar wife
By Bernice Bede Osol
HI AND LOIS
Dear Annie: My sister-in- that. What I don’t get is that law, “Marie,” has been diag- this event isn’t offering any nosed as bipolar, but doesn’t meals. That means dinner is take any medication. For 25 on us, and we will have to pay years, it has caused serious for drinks at the party. I think trouble. Marie is this is just plain a spiteful, evil, wrong. controlling human We are a small being. You can’t family and very find a single perclose. I have inson in town with vited my brother a kind word to to numerous dinsay about her. Her ners here over the own daughters try years. I suggested to keep their disthat we celebrate tance. his birthday with a My brother is family dinner at my afraid to leave her house, and he said, and instead seeks Annie’s Mailbox “That is not going the company of to happen.” I don’t other women. He’s had many know what to think. — Party affairs during their marriage. Pooper, Santa Cruz All of the men he works with Dear Party: We are conare aware of this and even en- fused by the words “hosting courage it because they see a party” when the guests are how awful his wife is. paying for everything. NoneAs brothers, we were al- theless, your brother can have ways close, but Marie has the party of his choosing in managed to sever our rela- the location he prefers, and tionship. My brother is not a you get to decide whether or healthy man. He works extra not to attend. Determine how hours in order to stay away important it is for you to be from home. His latest girl- there. If your brother would friend is a beautiful, kind, be hurt by your absence, sweet woman. He adores her, please go if you can afford to but is afraid of what Marie do so. might do. She has threatened Dear Annie: This is for to destroy his life if he ever “Searching for Answers,” leaves her. Her threats are whose wife of 11 years real. doesn’t want sex. She works While we do not condone in a profession, maintains a his cheating, the family has home, runs five miles a day witnessed his painful mar- to keep herself in shape and is riage. What can we do? — raising three young kids. I’d Brother to Brother like to offer him my insight Dear Brother: Marie of 73 years, 46 of which have should not be allowing her been spent married to my bipolar disease to control wonderful wife. her behavior. It would help if Sex is like the frosting on a your brother could get her to cake. It tops off a good thing. see a doctor and find a medi- But frosting without the cake cation that works for her. If is not satisfying. Those who she refuses and your brother marry in order to have an easy is truly afraid to leave because source of sex should work out of her threats, this would be some other way to satisfy considered emotional abuse. their needs. A marriage where Suggest that he contact the sex is the prime motivation Domestic Abuse Helpline for will become tedious and dull Men and Women (dahmw. or will not last. org) at 1-888-7HELPLINE. Marriage consists of many Dear Annie: My older things, some good, some bad. brother will be 60 this year, It is living day to day in a quiand he and his friends are et routine. It means that you hosting a group party in an- have a close companion with other state. His entire family whom you can share a sunset. lives here, including his son. Think before you throw in the That means for the major- towel on your marriage and ity of the guests, attending give up the cake for the frostwill include travel and ho- ing. — An Old Guy Who’s tel expenses. I am fine with Been There
WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 20, 2013
Take the necessary measures to secure your financial position. Make personal investments that are unique to you and do not require other parties to be involved. Your intuitive perceptions will increase your confidence and enable you to move forward in a pragmatic and precise manner. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) -- Discuss sensitive issues, and you will find workable solutions. A personal relationship will benefit if you take a unique approach to domestic duties. Follow your heart. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) -- Altering where or how you live may lead to an emotional situation, but once you do, it will eventually prove to be a good choice. Don’t let anyone manipulate you. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) -- Make your move. Strategy coupled with insight and a little luck will lead to victory. Put personal relationships first. Pay attention to what your friends and family respond to most favorably. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) -- Don’t ignore the facts. Listen and assure anyone who has concerns that you are aware and willing to compromise, but you won’t take the brunt of the responsibility alone. PISCES (Feb. 20-March 20) -You will have the upper hand. Don’t stop when there is so much to gain. Wheel and deal until you get what you want. An emotional relationship will be best dealt with passionately. ARIES (March 21-April 19) -- Everything will be dependent on how you get along with others. Reach for equality, and you will find common ground that will bring you closer to your goals. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) -Shop around and look for bargains. Heading for a destination that offers information and a chance to share with someone you enjoy being with should highlight your day. GEMINI (May 21-June 20) -- Work toward getting whatever is expected of you out of the way. You will discover a talent you didn’t know you had if you offer to help someone in need. CANCER (June 21-July 22) -Expand your interests and explore what life has to offer. Subscribe to something that will help you broaden your perspective and choices. Follow your heart and make a positive change. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) -- Make the changes you desire, but do so discreetly. The less people know about what you are up to, the less interference you face. Don’t take on responsibilities you cannot handle. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) -- Getting in touch with people you have worked with in the past will bring about new opportunities. Mix business with pleasure, and you will please everyone and secure your position. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) -Share your concerns, but don’t try to lay down the law. Compromise and keeping the peace will be your ticket to getting what you want. Change will be inevitable. Go with the flow. DISTRIBUTED BY UNIVERSAL UCLICK FOR UFS
HAGAR THE HORRIBLE
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