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Inside this New Fuel Beer

Issue of Cells Review


World News
Volume 87, Issue 11 March 7, 2007


in Brief
On Tuesday, a magnitude
6.3 earthquake was felt off
the coast of the island of A CSM Professor Is Mourned
Sumatra, Indonesia. The
deaths of two children Zach Aman February 18 at the Chapel at Red
Editorials Editor Rocks in Morrison, Colorado.
have been reported, and
Andre Dogan, Pierre’s son, re-
the quake was strong called; “He spent a lot of time grading
On January 30, 2007 Pierre Dogan,
enough to be felt in Singa- the papers at depth. He cared a lot
a professor of five years in the Engi-
pore and caused several neering Department at the Colorado about individual students from both
evacuations. School of Mines, passed away in San an academic viewpoint and personally
Diego, California. – who they were and what was going
Late Saturday night, a A memo from Dr. David Munoz, on in their lives. He was very happy
friend told the tabloid The also a Professor from the Engineering to be able to contribute back through
News of the World that a Division at CSM, said; “I knew that academia to the community and really
he had an accident while paragliding what he saw were the future leaders of
former pop-idol made an
in southern Mexico and sustained a the world.”
attempt on her own life According to Munoz, Pierre was
head injury. His wife, Anne-Marie,
with the claims that she is a superb instructor, going so far as to
had called from Mexico to let us know
the antichrist. Paramedics that he would not be able to teach the call students up if they were having
found her with a sheet tied Multidisciplinary Engineering Labora- trouble in his class. Andre Dogan said;
around her neck and the tory this spring. She indicated that he “He really enjoyed interacting with
other end tied to a light, would be in Mexico for a few weeks the students. He was passionate about
since then she has been convalescing before they could move learning and improving one’s abilities
placed on suicide watch him back to the US. At that time I and knowledge of the world. So, he de-
fully expected Pierre to recover. After rived a lot of personal satisfaction from
at the Promises Rehab
hearing nothing for several weeks, I bringing his knowledge to students and
Clinic in Malibu. helping them grow their perception of
tried to call his home in Morrison but
reached only a voice mail message. the richness of the world.”
On Monday, negotiators The card announcing his death came Andre Dogan also added that his
began discussions in New in the mail.” father spoke six languages and enjoyed
York to end the nuclear The accident occurred on January a variety of sports, including paraglid-
program in North Korea 8. According to Munoz, Dogan had ing, ice climbing, scuba diving, and
in exchange for aid and Courtesy Anne-Marie Dogan been coming down fast and steep and mountaineering. “He was really an
Pierre Dogan, a professor in the Engineering Department at Mines, his legs hit an object, making his head exceptional guy,” Andre noted.
“normalcy.” The Bush
passed away in late January after sustaining a serious head injury hit the ground.
administration is wary of while paragliding in Mexico.
expectations considering The funeral was held on Sunday,

Intermodal Transportation at CSM

North Korea’s sponsor-
ship of known terrorism.

Ivan Safronov, 51, of the

Kommersant newspaper Alexandra Harker compliments efforts by students, intermodal transportation fee does Quality (CMAQ) funding. The City of
died after a five story Guest Writer faculty, and staff at CSM to support not dictate the funds be used for RTD Golden is eligible for the same fund-
fall from his apartment intermodal transportation at Mines. service alone. In subsequent years it ing, and with cooperation from CSM,
building. The military-af- Popular support for an open house The recent completion of a campus- might be used for other transportation a circulating bus can become a reality.
fairs columnist and ag- on sustainability hosted by the City of wide transportation survey has led to demand management measures, for Following the model of other local
gressive critic commit- Golden on February 28th kept the doors a vote this spring that could give CSM example, towards funding a circulator cities, once a city-supported route
ted suicide, according to open, with standing room only, past students an RTD bus pass. On the bal- bus around the City of Golden. is established for a few years, RTD
9pm in the city chambers. The event lot for campus elections at the end of From 1996 to 1997 there was a cir- is then able to provide some level of
Russian investigators, but
was a forum for Golden residents to March, CSM students will have the culating bus around Golden that went matching funding.
colleagues strongly chal- opportunity to vote on an intermodal by the name GUS, an acronym for Many Golden organizations are
voice their vision for a sustainable
lenged this conclusion, transportation fee. Golden Urban Shuttle. Even though already discussing increasing trans-
future for Golden.
especially considering he As opposed to including only the GUS bus was discontinued, there portation options for Golden residents
Sustainability is defined as serving
lives on the third floor. current needs without sacrificing the cars in campus planning, intermodal are several reasons why a similar bus and visitors. The idea of a circulator
needs of the future. Led by Mayor planning links different transportation would be successful now. bus to serve Golden was suggested
Sacramento Kings’ For- Charles J. Baroch, the City of Golden networks for the highest effective- One reason is a circulating bus both at the city sustainability meeting
ward, Ron Artest, was ar- has embarked to become a leader ness with given resources, promoting would be able to link CSM students and at the Golden Urban Renewal
rested Monday on charges in sustainable policy and practices. modes of transportation that reduce and Golden residents to the coming Authority (GURA) meeting earlier the
Former Colorado School of Mines dependency on the car alone. ASCSM FastTracks light rail station at the same week. At both meetings citizens
of domestic violence and
president Ted Bickert emphasized supported the idea, proposed by Jefferson County Courthouse. An- expressed concerns with connecting
preventing the victim from graduate student Jonathan Meuser and other major incentive is the federal Golden to the coming light rail. Also,
the importance of this effort at the
reporting the crime. Artest undergraduate student Thomas Wells, grant money available for this type individuals expressed frustration with
meeting, calling the attendees to think
has been known for his voting 22-0 last month to approve the of project. In other Denver-area cit- lack of airport and regional bus ser-
about how current practices will affect
violent behavior with his the future generations of our children vote this spring for the fee increase. ies, local buses were not initially vice. The Golden Chamber of Com-
notorious brawl with fans and grandchildren. If passed, the intermodal transpor- funded by RTD but through a grant merce has begun to discuss transporta-
that resulted in a 73 game Recent interest in institutionalizing tation fee will be used to purchase an from the Denver Regional Council of
suspension. sustainability by the City of Golden RTD college pass for all CSM students Governments (DRCOG) that distrib-
in the 2007-2008 school year. The utes Congestion, Mitigation, and Air See BUS, Page 2

News - 2 Features - 5 Entertainment - 10 Editorials - 12 Sports - 14 Fool’s Gold - 15

Page 2 March 7, 2007

Bus Pass Back FE Meets Biology

bus with a short wait could provide a
more cost-effective solution. To those
students that cannot or will not take a
bus, those that can and will take bus

For Student Vote

will each leave one more parking Chemical Engineering department is
Lily Giddings
space available. working to change the requirements so
CSM Campus Architect, Paul
Staff Writer
that students will have to take Biology
Leef, has been working to keep in I to earn a degree.
communication with both the city The Fundamentals of Engineering
exam is one of two tests that engineer- These changes are coming about as
Continued from Page 1 and school groups with recent interest
that CSM has the ability to signifi- ing students must take before they a direct result of the rising importance
cantly contribute to the effort. in sustainable transportation alterna- of biology in many aspects of engi-
tives in Golden. For now, passing an become accredited engineers. The
tion options in Golden through an ad The reality is if alternate solutions neering. Engineers must now consider
intermodal transportation fee will test is administered by the National
hoc committee. One product of the for increased demand in parking are the effects of their products on not
give CSM students another chance of Council of Examiners for Engineering
City of Golden’s sustainability meet- not found, then parking structures will only the consumer, but also on the
securing an RTD college pass for next and Surveying, and covers the topics
ing was the formation of a committee be the only option. The cost for fund- environment, the resources available,
year and potentially keep the cost of most involved in engineering.
to address Golden’s sustainability in ing a parking structure would fall on and the potential long term effects.
driving to CSM reasonable in both the Until now, that list has included
terms of transportation. students and other potential parking Chemical Engineering professor
near and distant future. math, chemistry, computers, physics,
RTD route organizers have also structure users. The relatively small Dr. David Marr says; “Biology is
If you are interested in support- mechanics, economics, and ethics,
spoke to the potential benefits of a size of CSM’s student body makes becoming a big part of engineering.
ing the intermodal transportation among other topics. The test has
local route in Golden. In a recent financing parking garages an expen- It’s becoming as essential as chemistry
fee effort, or working with the CSM lately been revised to include a biol-
meeting hosted by students from sive endeavor. and physics.” The Chemical Engi-
Student Sustainability Committee on ogy portion.
CSM Student Council on Sustain- This short-term solution would neering department agrees: they are
other projects, look at the website at This change might pose a prob-
ability, RTD officials suggested that likely bring parking fees in the hun- looking into creating a new degree for lem to engineering students at the
in the long-term, CSM may be able dreds of dollars. Like many schools Chemical and Biological Engineer-
to find information about upcoming Colorado School of Mines, as few
to promote sustainable transportation that have taken this path, the plan dealt ing. Marr asserts: “We really need
meetings. Also, if you are interested biology classes are offered to students,
options for the Golden area most ef- with the parking problem. The high to make a home for bioengineering
in finding out more about options and most majors do not require that
fectively by working with the City of cost of driving gets most people to find at Mines.”
for parking demand at CSM see the students take a biology class.
Golden to promote a local circulator. other means like taking a local bus, Currently the bioengineering
CSM Parking and Analysis of Options This will be changing soon, in
By voting for the intermodal transpor- walking, or biking. This can create classes that Mines students can take
report available for download at the many departments on campus. Aside
tation fee now, students are increasing cash flow problems when it comes to are offered at Red Rocks Community
same site. from the exam, ABET-accreditation
options for students in the short run, paying for the parking structure. College. Hopefully soon, even within
standards are being changed to require
but also showing the City of Golden With around 70% of CSM students the next year, bioengineering will be
that engineers have at least a rudimen-
and their potential funding partners living in the local zip code, a local offered at Mines.

Spaceport For Orbital Flights Taking Off

tary understanding of biology. The

Kim Vo son’s Virgin Group which focuses Rutan. Rutan was also the designer that a Virgin Galactic flight would patiently to see if Branson’s flights are
Staff Writer on commercial space flights. For two of the SpaceShipTwo’s predecessor, be “many times safer” than a NASA successful. If Virgin Galactic proves
hundred thousand dollars, a ticket the SpaceShipOne, which won the space flight. to be successful, space vacations can
Virgin customers everywhere could be purchased to Ansari X Prize of $10 Morgan Gerber, freshman, says; become possible and space flight
now have the opportunity to fulfill board Virgin Galactic’s “The first com- million for the first non- “The idea of the flights would be would not just be limited to govern-
SpaceShipTwo and orbit government organiza- scary at first. It’s not very often we ment researchers, but for the wealthy
the earth for 2.5 hours. mercial flights tion that could launch a
their wanton dreams—dreams to be
an astronaut, that is. On January 27, send people up there, so sending mass and curious.
2007, Virgin Galactic made the an- The cost also covers two are scheduled reusable manned flight numbers of people could really be Adam Shoemaker, junior, has re-
to three days worth of into space. dangerous. But they will probably marked; “There are a lot of potential
nouncement that they were allying
with Spaceport Sweden in order to flight training. The first to begin in According to BBC find a safe way to accomplish it.” markets in that area. Space flight
open a space port in Kiruna, Sweden. commercial flights are 2009 from New News, Branson states Junior Andrew Ferguson says; could be the new fad that kids will
Not only would this open the doors scheduled to begin in that customers “…can “There’s government supervision on want. It’ll eventually be on that show
for more European customers to brave 2009 from New Mexico. Mexico.” experience weightless- the launching and FAA guidelines to Sweet Sixteen by MTV!”
space, but the new port could open up The SpaceShipTwo is ness, they will check guarantee a safe flight. It’s going to For more information on Virgin
the opportunity for space flights into designed to comfortably sit six pas- out that the Earth is round and enjoy be safe.” Galactic spaceflights, visit: http://
the Aurora Borealis. sengers and two pilots on plush leather space.” Though some skeptics are With the much anticipated Virgin
Virgin Galactic is a subsidiary seats with wide open windows. The worried about the safety of such Galactic flights scheduled to depart
company within Sir Richard Bran- SpaceShipTwo was designed by Burt commercial flights, Branson states in 2009, space lovers have to wait

Google Expands Its Uses

& Spreadsheets” include slow upload- a friend is on vacation, but you need
ing, slow saving, a bland and basic help editing that MEL Lab write-up,
interface, and few tools to choose Google is the way to go. All the cre-
from. Picture sizes are also restricted ator has to do is invite their colleagues
Mike Stone like your Biology paper or your Quant Another benefit is the ability for to 2MB. Most of this, however; will be or friends to view their work with an
Staff Writer Lab Report.) the user to go back through rough eliminated with future version releases email address.
Some critics claim the site is drafts and see the revisions they have as the site is new and still working The site can be found at docs.
For those tech-nerds at Mines that Google’s attempt at recreating Mi- made. Since the document is available out the glitches. In time, it should be where more web based
don’t already know, Google released crosoft Word, but why not? Word is on the internet, it can be accessed from advanced enough to compete with programs from Google await. These
“Google Docs & Spreadsheets” on a great tool, user friendly and useful, anywhere and you will no longer need Microsoft Word as “Google Word.” include the famous Gmail and new
October 10th of last year. The web- but Google goes above and beyond that flash drive in your pocket. Finally, One of the best and biggest reasons Picasa Web Album manager.
site is a program where users can log that to facilitate the man on the move. once the document is finished it can be to use the site is under the collabora- Final note: This article was made
in from anywhere with internet and With Google Docs, all the user’s files posted on the internet, added to your tion tab. With this feature enabled, using “Google Docs & Spread-
create, edit and post rich text files for are arranged in a neat fashion just blog, or sent to your friends with the people can view and edit the document sheets.”
free. (This would include anything like email. click of a button. simultaneously from across the coun-
The down sides to “Google Docs try with real time updates. So, when

Laser In New Light

made, but THEL is a chemical laser,
which depends on a constant source of
reactants and is considerably bulkier.
If a 100 kW SSHCL is achieved,
E-Days Highlight
the team at Lawrence Livermore be- Rebecca Hubis a huge success.”
Chase Hoffman size on a one inch steel target, we blow This year the committee strived to
a hole through it in seven seconds.” Its lieves that if can be fitted into a simple E-Days Committee
Assistant Editor-in-Chief put together an E-Days with history,
application could mean a significant 30 ft. trailer.
E-Days is only a few short weeks tradition, entertainment, food, fun, and
At the Lawrence Livermore Na- tactical advantage in the battlefield an overall awesome weekend.
with the ability to destroy targets up away! It’s time for everyone to get
tional Lab (LLNL) a new record has excited! One big accomplishment was
been achieved for a to kilometers away. signing Flogging Molly to be the
The goal is to reach The committee has been work-
solid state laser. This ing tirelessly over the past couple headliner band. Concert chair Richard
laser, also called the the 100 kW mark, which Barnes felt Flogging Molly was a
should be sufficient to months to put together an E-Days
Solid State Heat Ca- Courtesy LLNL that will blow previous E-Days out good choice.
pacity Laser (SSH- dismantle and destroy “They are an upbeat band that
targets easily in combat. of the water.
CL), can produce a Derek Morgan, director of Student gives off a lot of energy, which is what
pulsed beam at 200 Higher energy lasers students really want to see. Nobody
have been achieved with Activities and Advisor of the E-Days
Hz that has an aver- committee, feels that this year’s E- wants to go to a concert and stand
age power output of the THEL (Tactical High around, they want to jump, dance,
Days will be at a whole new level.
about 67 kW. Courtesy LLNL Energy Laser) which can sing, etc. It’s hard to be energetic
produce a continuous “The students, faculty, and com-
In comparison, Dr. munity have some fairly high stan- when the band just acts like it is a job.”
Yamamoto of LLNL said; “In our 25 wave (cw) laser with an
output power in the megawatt range. dards for E-Days,” said Morgan. “But
kW configuration and our 2.5 cm2 spot I have no doubt that this year will be Please see SAFAR-E on Page 3
Several successful tests have been Courtesy LLNL
March 7, 2007 Page 3

Greek Weekend Recap

The Greek Life Office would like to thank the following chapters and individu-
als for their dedication to the CSM Greek Community and recognize their
outstanding achievements.

A Look At The Outstanding Fraternity of the Year – Sigma Alpha Epsilon

Outstanding Sorority of the Year – Pi Beta Phi
Festivities In Greek Man of the Year – Marc Guerra (SAE)
Pictures Greek Women of the Year – Alli Nold (Sigma Kappa)

Best Philanthropy Program – Pi Beta Phi

Best Single Philanthropy Event – Beta Theta Pi
Best Recruitment & New Member Program – Sigma Phi Epsilon
Best Scholarship Program – Phi Gamma Delta (FIJI)
Best Outreach Program – Sigma Nu

Most Improved Chapter – Alpha Tau Omega

Best Advisor – Megan Hessee (Sigma Kappa)
Courtesy Jen Doane
Members from the fraternities and sororities Outstanding Graduating Senior – Justin Chichester (SAE)
participated in the Plato with Play-duo contest Most Active Greek – Brent Koren (Kappa Sigma)
as part of Greek Weekend 2007 events. The IFC Man of the Year – Nick Pfeffer (SAE)
theme this year was “Mines Olympus” and the Panhellenic Women of the Year – Coree Javernick (Pi Beta Phi)
slogan was: “Who Needs Olympus, When You New Member of the Year – Daniel Morris (SAE)
Have Zion?” Alpha Phi took second place in Courtesy Jen Doane
the competition with their sculpture of Marvin Over $500 were raised in this year’s Penny Greek Weekend 2007 Champions – Alpha Tau Omega
the Miner. Wars, an annual Greek Weekend event. The
money was donated to the Beta Theta Pi Ski- Thank you to all chapters for contributing to Penny Wars. Over $500 was
a-thon, which raises money for the St. Anthony raised and donated to the Beta Theta Pi Ski-a-thon supporting the St.
Helmet Program. Anthony’s Helmet Program.

Courtesy Jen Doane

Greek Weekend committee
members, Ryan Lowen and

GOLDEN Coree Javernick, sort and count

change after the end of Penny

Courtesy Jen Doane

Use your BlasterCard and receive a Greek chapters battled each

other during the Greek Feud

FREE order of Domino’s Breadsticks*!

competition held Friday night.
Chapters also participated in a
Knowledge Bowl.
*Cinna Stix, Cheesy Bread or Brownies NOT Valid w/ offer

Please have your C W I D # available when placing your order

$4.99 – One Small 1-topping Courtesy Jen Doane

Students zoomed down West
pizza + a 20oz Coke Campus Road as part of the
Chariot Races held on Saturday
$6.99 – One Large 1-topping pizza of Greek Weekend. Beta Theta Pi
and Alpha Phi won first place with
NEW! - ADD A SIDE OF GARLIC DIP SAUCE FOR $0.50 their red and blue chariot.

Buy ANY Pizza at regular menu price and receive a 2nd

Courtesy Jen Doane
pizza of equal or lesser value FREE Members of Alpha Tau Omega
pulled their way to victory and
not only won Greek Olympics,
One Pizza with up to 3 – toppings but were Greek Weekend Cham-
Small - $5.99 Medium - $6.99 pions.
Large - $8.99

3 Medium 1-topping pizzas for $5 EACH

*Minimum of 3 ordered to get special price
Safar-E Days Soon
Continued from Page 2 E-Days!
Buy a Large 1-topping pizza for $9.99 Last year, the packages (which
Richard also wanted to announce that included a t-shirt, a coconut cup,
& receive an order of Breadsticks for Single File will be the opening band. and tickets) sold out before the
FREE If you’re curious about their sound, weekend even started. So this year,
check out their Myspace profile. don’t hesitate! Packages will go
Kris Illi, the E-Days Chair, was on sale the week before E-Days,
Hours: asked what she felt would be the says Illi. “The packet is $25 and
Monday – Thursday 11am – Midnight “don’t miss” event this year at E- includes an official Safar-E-Days
Days. T-shirt, an 18-oz water bottle with the
Friday & Saturday 11am – 1am “I can’t answer this question,” logo, concert ticket, charity BBQ ticket,
Sunday 11am – 11pm she replied. “The whole weekend is Comedian Ticket, and a cou-
going to be frickin’ AWESOME. But ple of other safari goodies.
if I must try, I’d have to pick between They will go on sale Monday,
Having a Meeting, Party or Special Event? Domino’s Pizza proudly accepts ALL Flogging Molly at the concert, the March 19th, at 11 AM in the student
Colorado School of Mines FIELD PURCHASE ORDERS. ever-growing fireworks show, Myth- center.”
busters giving a lecture, and the field Make sure you get out there and
*** Special pricing available on orders of 5 pizzas of more! Call today for a price quote. *** events because there’s always so much experience some of the magic that will
going on.” be Safar-E-Days. Check back here to
©2006 Domino’s Pizza LLC. Not Valid with any other offer. Valid only at participating stores. Cash Value 1/20¢. Prices may vary. Minimum purchase required. So with only a few weeks left, get the latest E-Days 2007 updates!
Our Driver’s carry less than $20. Limited Delivery area. Delivery Charge may apply. Customer pays sales tax where applicable it’s time to start planning for Safar-
Page 4 March 7, 2007

Distributed Intelligence at CARDI

networks, which focus only on sensor technology and wave propagation
networks, “we want to do more than through the mine, while the computer
just sense stuff, we want to do some- scientist will focus on routing data.
thing about it,” said Dr. Moore. With mobile ad-hoc networks like
As a result, “CARDI is about the one in the Edgar Mine, a group of
not just about putting information sensors is located far away from a re-
systems together, but must also ceiver. To save power, these sensors
consider the phenom- send their data
enology—the physi- “Language is the big- to a progression
cal phenomena—in- gest challenge of inter- of other sensors
volved in the pro- disciplinary research... which eventually
cesses we try to con- reach the base.
trol,” said Dr. Moore, When everyone’s sit- Most sensors in
again pointing to ting down and looking these networks
the need for inter- at the same differential have a radio to
disciplinary efforts, send and receive
which must include equation, it turns out to data and a battery
domain specialists be the same thing. The to power it.
who understand the language of science An example
Photo Courtesy of Warner Brothers physical phenomena of an application
isn’t uniform.” is a series of sen-
Hilary Brown
cross-disciplinary projects. at the same differential equation, it One project fo- - Dr. Kevin Moore sors placed on a
Features Editor cuses on autonomy- ski mountain. If
Dr. Kevin Moore, director of turns out to be the same thing. The
CARDI, mentions robotics as an ex- language of science isn’t uniform,” assisted tele-operation, which in- the snow starts melting at one spot,
Mines students learn early that to ample of an interdisciplinary research said Dr. Moore. He added that despite volves controlling robots remotely. the data can be sent to the base and
solve a complex problem they have area. “Robotics is too broad for any the challenges of interdisciplinary It combines mobile robotics with help to predict an avalanche. This
to cooperate with one another, not one discipline to deal with. You research, it is also rewarding, because computer-assisted video recognition application highlights the interdis-
only within their area of expertise, but need mechanical design, electrical everyone has a common goal and a to create a robot that can navigate ciplinary focus because electrical
also across disciplines. The Center for engineering, and you need computer common understanding of that goal. through a building while an operator engineers are needed to design the
Automation, Robotics, and Distrib- science to provide intelligence-type Funding for CARDI comes from monitors its field of vision remotely. electronics, computer scientists
uted Intelligence (CARDI) is known algorithms that tell the robot how to government and industrial organiza- “We want to let the robot do what it design the data transmission, and
for its interdisciplinary approach to act and behave. It’s hard to find a spe- tions, including the National Science does best: open doors, navigate, and geophysicists determine how the data
research. cialist in all three” said Dr. Moore. Foundation (NSF), the Defense Ad- collect things. This allows the remote can predict an avalanche.
CARDI comprises seventeen “From a big picture, robotics used vanced Research Projects Agency operator to focus on recognizing pat- Other activities include meetings
members that represent at least five to be just a robotic arm mounted to a (DARPA), and Lockheed-Martin. terns and danger,” said Dr. Moore and colloquia. CARDI members at-
different disciplines—Engineering, wall. Then, just mechanical engineer- Three major areas of CARDI Another project in the Edgar Mine tend a monthly meeting to discuss
Mathematics and Computer Science, ing and electrical engineering was research are mobile manipulation, explores the use of autonomously current research, potential research,
Metallurgical and Materials Engi- enough. Now, it is moving towards activity recognition, and distributed reconfigurable systems. Twelve radio and budget use.
neering, Environmental Science and autonomous mobile systems and you networks for sensing and control, nodes will be placed in the mine by CARDI exemplifies interdisci-
Engineering, and Geophysics. need computer science for that,” said though there are currently more than August, with hopes to install up to plinary research, while advancing the
Areas of interest include robotics, Dr. Moore. ten projects. A major thrust of the 100 by next year. Future application application of automation, robotics,
sensor/actuator development, smart “Language is the biggest chal- CARDI lab is in distributed intel- would allow sensors to reroute the and distributed intelligence systems.
materials, intelligent control, ad- lenge of interdisciplinary research. ligence, with a focus on distributed airflow and close passages if there “When deciding whether or not to
vanced signal processing, computer As an electrical engineer, I use ‘time networks of sensors and actuators. was a toxic gas leak, for example. work at Mines, I looked at CARDI
vision, networking and distributed constant,’ but a chemist will probably These networks sense the state of a The project will be jointly com- and felt that it was a very viable
intelligence. An interdisciplinary use the word ‘relaxation rate.’ When system and then try to control it. pleted by an electrical engineer, a group. I think it is an asset to the
approach is necessary to complete everyone’s sitting down and looking Unlike a number of other univer- computer scientist, and a student. The institution,” said Dr. Moore.
sity research programs in distributed electrical engineer will focus on radio

Seeking Ideal Design at the Colorado Fuel Cell Center

Jason Fish
News Editor to the cell. By electrochemical half
reactions between the two reactants,
New research is happening at an electrical current is produced and
the Colorado Fuel Cell Center, the tapped for use much the same way
new lab on campus in the General as a standard Duracell™ battery.
Research Laboratory building. The biggest difference between fuel
Starting last semester, Ryan cells and conventional batteries is
O’Hayre, CSM alum and new as- the only by-product is water, which
sistant professor in is what makes the
the Materials and “We want to try and un- mainstreaming of
Metallurgy depart- derstand performance fuel cells so ap-
ment began work pealing.
o n s m a l l - s c a l e effects related to ambient Some of the
air-breathing fuel climate. It’s hard to design challenges in fuel
cells. a package that can handle cell development
O’Hayre is aided deal with support
in his work by two Sahara Desert as well as systems. “You see
undergraduate stu- Seattle conditions.” the stack of actual
dents. A.J. Tupper, -Ryan O’Hayre fuel cells surround-
a Mechanical Engi- ed by a lot of tubes,
neering major, has fans, pumps, and Photo Courtesy of Toyota Motor Corp.
been setting up the fuel cell testing tanks, so it gets bulky,” said O’Hayre.
station in the CFCC. The other is “The actual stack is only a small part
Bryan Babcock, from the Electrical of the whole system.” ent climate,” said O’Hayre. “It’s hard powering. and graduated in 1999 with a Bache-
Engineering department, who has His projects are focusing on a to design a package that can handle Another aspect being addressed is lor’s degree in Materials Science and
been working on new fuel cell proto- simple, passive design for a fuel cell Sahara Desert as well as Seattle keeping the cells cool while operat- Engineering and obtained a minor
types. “These guys have been doing that can give out the most power conditions.” ing. “These cells give off quite a bit in Public Affairs from the McBride
a great job and really deserve some possible while remaining stable in The small size of these fuel cells of heat when running at full power,” Honors Program. Upon graduation
recognition,” said O’Hayre. the surrounding environment. limits their powering capabilities, said O’Hayre. The research on this he attended Stanford University in
The official name of O’Hayre’s The fuel cells O’Hayre is develop- but they are useful in a wide variety subject is considering heat fins in- California, receiving his PhD in
work is Material Devices for Energy ing are sensitive to temperature and of small electronic devices such as corporated into the fuel cell structure. Materials Science and Engineering in
Conversion. According to him, one humidity changes. With the new test- handheld radios, cell phones, PDAs, Different kinds of materials for the 2004. Heading east, he applied for a
of the most important goals in this ing station, he and the students under and laptop computers. basic construction with more ideal position at Mines. “I really wanted to
new project is to minimize support him will be embedding sensors in the Some new ideas O’Hayre and his thermal properties are also being come back here,” said O’Hayre.
systems, size, and, cost. “We want to fuel cell material to test the effects of group are working on now include a considered and tested. “We want to The research continues at the
use cheap processes,” he said. changing temperature and humidity wicking system that can be attached be clever about thermally designing CFCC and the development of fuel
The idea behind these new over time, to find an ideal design. atop the cell to move the water pro- the cells to dissipate heat efficiently,” cells remains a hot field in the search
fuel cells is a process combining “We want to try and understand duced away from the components said O’Hayre. for cleaner sources of fuel for today’s
oxygen from the surrounding air with performance effects related to ambi- of both cell and the device it is The new professor attended CSM world.
a reservoir of hydrogen connected
March 7, 2007 Page 5

A Semester in Aarhus
Michael Hoban talks about his semester in Denmark
Jason Fish enrolled in classes he could transfer income and sales taxes run by the roommates included several students burger, drink,
News Editor back to Mines. Among his socially democratic set from Spain, Germany, Lithuania, and and dessert
courses he took Aerody- up of Denmark’s gov- Romania. you could
Denmark can often be character- namics, Steel Structures, ernment. “The Spanish kids were definitely spend around
ized by its long, windy winters and Vibrations, and a class on “You would pay a crazy,” said Hoban. “They would twenty dol- Courtesy Michael Hoban
frequently overcast skies. But, as computer aided design. lot on your taxes but party starting at eleven at night and lars easily.”
Michael Hoban found out, it is an The way classes are the state benefits and not stop till four or so in the morning The public transportation system
interesting country with many fasci- run and how higher educa- welfare system were then not go to class because it was was much different than that in Colo-
nating traits, especially for a student tion is generally viewed in very extensive,” said too cold out.” rado. Bus lines were extensive with
on international exchange. Denmark differs markedly Hoban. “School was The exchange program at the uni- frequent routes, making waiting time
Hoban is a junior in the Mechani- from CSM. good and important, versity focused on giving the visiting minimal. Bicycles are also a dominant
cal Engineering department at the “You had homework, but definitely not pri- students time off to explore the coun- form of getting around. “I rode my
Colorado School of Mines and took but they never collected ority one for the stu- try and surrounding nations. bike nearly every day,” said Hoban.
last semester to study abroad at the it,” said Hoban. “Your dents.” “I went to Norway, Sweden, “They had specific lanes for bicycle
Engineering College of Aarhus in whole grade for the se- The college as- Germany, the Netherlands, Hungary, traffic with their own lights and rules
Aarhus, Denmark as a foreign ex- mester was based on one signed Hoban a hous- and Austria,” said Hoban. He even and there were bike rush hours on the
change student. test.” Students in one of his ing arrangement upon met up with another CSM exchange streets everyday.”
“It’s a college town with about classes were also required his arrival. He shared student and friend, Amy Dubetz, who The social life around Aarhus
40,000 students and several differ- to meet with the professor a suite-style dormitory was attending a college in Budapest, was geared towards students. Bars
ent universities,” said Hoban. The regularly to demonstrate with ten other exchange Hungary the same semester. would host international student
engineering college contained about on a blackboard that they students as part of the While life was more relaxed nights and the drinking age is cur-
1500 students and Hoban was one of understood the material Courtesy Michael Hoban university’s exchange in Denmark than in the states, the rently 15, and so added a dynamic not
only two Americans. covered and could perform example program. standard of living demanded a higher found for most students at CSM.
Rather than taking a break from calculations. “I had my own bedroom and price. Overall, Michael greatly enjoyed
the CSM curriculum like some ex- For Danish citizens, all education bathroom, but we all shared a living “It’s an expensive society,” said his experience and recommends such
change students do abroad, Hoban is state-funded, a trade-off for higher area and kitchens,” said Hoban. His Hoban. “If you were to go out for just a an experience to any Mines student.

Adventures in Colorado
Henrik Persson talks about his semesters at Mines
Hilary Brown final exam that makes up our grade for Denver. Later I bought a car, and it’s Sweden,” said Persson. He added that a totally dif-
the whole class. Of course so much cheaper and “Americans are more open at the first ferent plane
Features Editor
we get homework during easy to have a car here; step, but harder to really know on a in Sweden,
Henrik Persson is widening his the semester, but usually the gas is 1/3 of Swed- deeper level.” and so much
scholastic opportunities through a we don’t have to hand it ish prices and it’s not Relationships with family mem- more natural Courtesy Henrik Persson
semester (or two!) at Mines. Origi- in – instead it’s our own that many complicated bers are also much different. “I have for us,” said Persson. “The American
nally from Sweden, Persson began responsibility to learn what rules and yearly tests really had problems to understand way of camping have got me laughing
his studies here last fall. Most students we need for the final.” of the cars here,” said how you can accept your overprotect- many times, you can pretty much go
who study abroad do so for only one He is active in many Persson. ing parents you have here! Curfews anywhere only with a credit card.”
semester. clubs on campus, includ- When asked how and restrictions don’t apply in that Persson has traveled both inside
Unlike those students, Persson is ing the kayaking club, he felt about Mines way in Sweden. Your own responsi- and outside of Colorado during his
the midst of his second semester. “I the bike team, and the students, Henrik said; bility and behavior is vital in Sweden, stay. He climbed a “fourteener” for
went home for Christmas, but when ballroom dancing club. “Well! I can’t com- freedom under responsibility!” the first time and traveled on road trips
I got the chance to stay here for an “Generally I try to hook plain at all! You all Persson says that studying at with friends.
entire year, of course I wanted to do up with people, whatever do a great job with Mines has changed his outlook on Persson found a place to live
that! That gives me a chance to experi- fun is happening, and also school and are really life—“especially it got me to consider through the help of Mines and the
ence the entire year with all seasons come up with fun things to nice to me, despite what balance I want between work and International Student Office. “It’s
and its weather shifts, and it also do with people. I go rock your burden.” fun in my life. It has also taught me generally more expensive here, and
make it easier to make friends here,” climbing, swing dancing “[People] are gen- how much some people really can be the conditions are often cleaner in
said Persson. socially and with a troop Courtesy Henrik Persson erally, at a first glance, ‘into’ the school here and how they Sweden. It isn’t that usual in Sweden
Persson is taking four classes this in downtown Denver, ski- much nicer here, and treat their lives (or lack of) outside to share a house, like a lot of students
semester: algorithms and design, ing, hiking, running…. you name it,” easy to get in touch with. After a while school.” do here,” Persson said, while compar-
prob-stats, info systems, and wireless he said. though, it feels different to keep up “I miss the coast and sea where I ing living conditions.
communication. “I realized it’s very difficult to re- the relation I get with people, maybe grew up and the nature (forest) is ev- “Golden and CSM feel a little like
“The biggest difference is that it ally ‘live’ here without my own car. because the culture makes me expect erywhere in Sweden. We have right of a closed happy bubble. It’s nice here
is so many [classes] but short lessons Taking the bus is time consuming so more out of friends and the way we common, to access all non-private ar- and you have most facilities you need.
here with homework all the time. We I rarely do that. The first months, I usually talk to each other. But that eas as long we don’t destroy anything, But the nearness to Denver is really
only take two lessons in parallel in did find rides with friends or took my may also be because I associate with so being in the woods and living in nice and supplies another dimension
Sweden, and after 8 weeks we have a bike when I had to go to downtown younger people here then I do in symphony with the environment is on of things to do and people to meet.”

On the Banks of the Danube

Amy Dubetz talks about her semester in Hungary
“The classes were definitely not urban Budapest, close to the banks of student at the university that disdain public trans-
Jason Fish
as difficult as the ones at the Danube River and for America is more of a social fad portation sys-
News Editor near the university.
Mines,” said Amy. “They than a fundamental philosophy. “It tems for 10
Straddling the Danube River, the were all about memo- Amy said the housing has been trendy to hate America,” said U.S. dollars.
capital of Hungary, Budapest, sits as rization and not much was nice and comfort- Dubetz. “You are labeled as weird if The city Courtesy Amy Dubetz
it has for centuries. Last semester, synthesis.” able, costing about 200 you don’t hate America.” also held
this bustling city was home to Amy According to Dubetz, U.S. dollars a month Budapest has a long history, domi- some exciting times for Amy during
Dubetz, an exchange student from the finding living in Budapest for all rent and utility nated by periods of occupation by her stay. On Monday, October 23,
Colorado School of Mines. was an adventure from expenses. the Roman, Mongolian, and Ottoman 2006, a riot took place in downtown
Dubetz is a junior double-majoring the start. Enrolling at the Away from the empires as well as Austrian and Soviet Budapest. Amy and her roommates
in Chemistry and Chemical Engineer- university with about 150 classroom Amy trav- control. The most recent conquerors, had been out at the time and were
ing along with pursuing a minor in other exchange students, eled nearly every the Russians, left much of the city close to some of the action as they
Public Affairs through the McBride mostly from other Europe- weekend, visiting in ruins with bombing and siege traveled back to their apartment. “That
Honors Program. an countries, Amy had to eleven different coun- campaigns in the mid 1900s. Despite was the first time I ran away from tear
She returned to CSM this spring ask around for roommate tries around Europe. the damage to large parts of the city, gas to get home,” said Amy.
after completing a semester studying groups seeking housing. “Everything is so including many old and beautiful The experience of a semester
at the Budapest University of Technol- “I went there kind of cheap over there com- buildings, Amy said she still found it abroad was a very enjoyable one for
ogy and Economics. scared, not being familiar pared to the States,” very intriguing. Amy as she was immersed in a dif-
Amy enrolled in a myriad of with anything there,” said Courtesy Amy Dubetz said Dubetz. “They are rebuilding a lot of the ferent culture and lifestyle. “People
courses including Probability and Dubetz. While traveling, old city and there are still intact castles are a lot more patient and calm over
Statistics, History of Central Europe, She was eventually able to find Amy said she found a predominant and houses from a lot of different time there,” she said.
Hungarian language, and a class on housing by asking a group of four ex- attitude of dislike for Americans periods,” said Dubetz. Amy went on to say some of this
society and technology to substitute change students if they needed a fifth coming from her fellow exchange stu- Budapest has an extensive public attitude ‘rubbed’ off on her and she
in her McBride course flow. roommate. Her arrangement consisted dents and in other countries. “There’s transportation system of four sub- has retained that mental perspective
While she found the coursework of students from Australia, Finland, definitely a stereotype of the apathetic, ways, multiple tram lines, and a bus on life as she continues her educa-
interesting, especially the Hungarian Portugal, and Italy. “I got along great selfish, and ignorant American,” said network with regular night busses for tion at Mines. “It was amazing,” said
language, the style and pace were dif- with my roommates,” said Amy. Dubetz. after-hours travel. University students Dubetz.
ferent from CSM academics. Their apartment was located in She later found out from a German could buy monthly passes covering all
Page 6 March 7, 2007

Doesn’t Taste
Like Spit
Chris Phillips
Business Manager
This issue, we look at Moose well, and I felt that
Drool Brown Ale – Big Sky Brewing the two tastes played
Company’s best seller. off of each other very
Appearance – Moose Drool pours well, and the flavor
with over 3 fingers worth of head. A was consistent.
finger’s worth is retained for quite Mouth-feel – This beer was car-
awhile, so expect to get some of it as bonated well. It could possibly use
you drink the beer. The beer itself is a little more, but not too much. This
dark brown with a little bit of a red- need is also offset by the fact that the
dish color to it that you can only see beer is somewhat heavy. I found it to
if you hold it up to the light. It’s truly be a smooth, non-watery beer.
inviting for someone who likes a good Drink-ability – This is definitely
dark ale, stout, or porter. something that I would have again.
Because Aunt Joan needed more Botox®*. Smell - This has a good, strong It is not, however, a beer that you
smell. It is semi-sweet, with a definite can drink very quickly. It requires
She got a facelift, you got the tuition bill.
flavoring of both malt and hops. These that you provide enough time in the
Not to worry: a Campus Door student loan can mix well, and it smells like what I mouth and take small enough gulps
cover up to 100% of your education costs,
think of when I hear “beer.” You can as you drink it.
with online approval in less than a minute.
All without the painful side effects. get various smells from the beer at Overall – I really enjoyed this beer,
different times – chocolate, hops, and and I look forward to having another
some that I couldn’t quite recognize. one. I would recommend that anyone
Taste - The taste was overall very looking for good brown ale find a
pleasant. Slightly bitter, but I didn’t bottle of this!
feel that the bitterness took away Note: Neither The Oredigger nor
from the beer. In fact, it added to it the Big Sky Brewing Company pro-
in the brown-ale style. Also, the malt motes or condones the consumption
*Botox® is a registered trademark of Allergan, Inc.
added sweetness to the beer. This of alcohol by anyone less than 21
Like this poster? Download your own printable PDF version at
sweetness offset any bitterness very years of age.
All loans are subject to credit approval. Programs, rates, terms and conditions are subject to change without notice. Other restrictions apply.
Trade/Servicemarks are the property of Campus Door Inc. and/or its affiliates. Lender is Lehman Brothers Bank, FSB. ©2006 Campus Door Inc. All Rights
Reserved. Equal Opportunity Lender. Quick Facts:

Geek Week
Brewer – Big Sky Brewing

of Company, Missoula, MT.

Style – Brown Ale
Alcohol Content–5.3% by volume
...Rob Donley, Senior
A Saucy Surprise
Charlie Frost
Staff Reporter
[Oredigger] When did you
first realize you were a “geek”?

Bandanas’ southern-style
[Donley] When I was little, I
used to take apart remote control
cars and wire the batteries in series
and in parallel. I didn’t know what
the terms meant at the time. All
BBQ a big hit
I knew was that I kept winning Andrew Aschenbrenner I decided to order a combo plat-
demolition derbies. Editorials Editor ter to sample as much as possible.
What is the geekiest item Bandanas cooks and serves their meat
you own? I’ve always considered good, af- sauceless and with a dry rub, and pro-
My Lego car. It’s got a working fordable restaurants in Denver to be vides you with four sauces to choose
V8, manual transmission and four few and far between. One food catego- from at your table. It was nice not to be
wheel steering. ry that has been missing near Golden served meat drenched in sauce. I was
Do you own any 20 sided is barbeque. This has changed with the happy with the portions, which are
die? arrival of Bandanas Bar-B-Q. plenty for the average appetite.
Actually, yes. Does anyone re- Bandanas is a restaurant enterprise The service was fast, and the food
member the game called Magic?! based in St. Louis, MO. The company took only about 15 minutes to come.
Most definitely. When was has seventeen franchises in the St. The pulled pork was so-so, but the
the last time you pulled out the Louis area, but its Lakewood loca- beef was very good and the chicken
Magic cards? tion (one block north of Union and was excellent. The ribs also stood out
They have been in plastic sheets Alameda) is the only one in Colorado. as they were better than the ribs at
since the last day of sixth grade. They specialize in barbeque, and the most other places. Fried corn as a side
When it comes to music, do minute that I got out of my car, I is also really good. In total, a meal for
you geek out on heavy metal? could “smell that smoke.” Bandanas two should run about $15-$25.
MEGADETH! And Tool. Lat- has a 9.0 rating on Citysearch, and is Bandanas had great food for an
Courtesy Rob Donley
eralus. Enough said. highly recommended in all but one affordable price, and the service was
Rob Donley began his journey to “geekiness” with toy cars.
Who is your favorite member user review. good. For those of you over 21, they
of Weezer? you think of it? Barbeque is a food category that also have a “happy hour” from 3-
As cool as Sonic the Hedgehog
You know, I think Beck is more Didn’t see it, although, Samuel varies by region, and Bandanas 6:30pm. It’s a good place for lunch or
is, who can beat the Super Nintendo
geeky than Weezer. You don’t have Jackson is the baddest ass mother advertises “Southern Style BBQ.” dinner, and take-out is available if you
bazooka? There’s no topping Mech-
to be a geek to like Beck. You have $%@#! of all time. Pork, beef, ribs, turkey, chicken, and don’t have time to sit down for a meal.
Warrior. And when you get tired of
to be a geek to be Beck. Favorite pickup line to use on smoked sausage are their core menu I definitely recommend Bandanas as
that, there is always Zelda, which is
Computer languages. Are you the ladies? items. According to their website an all-around good place to eat.
like my virtual alter-ego.
multilingual? I don’t know. I guess I don’t use (, their pork and To get to Bandanas, take Highway
Fortran and MATLAB save my
Do you think one of beef is smoked for fourteen hours 6 to Union/Simms and go south to
“lines”. With my current girlfriend, I
ass on a daily basis. believe it started with “are you gonna your friends is Geek- and the ribs and chicken are smoked Cedar. Turn right on Cedar, and the
Windows or Mac? finish that?” of-the-Week material? for five hours in real wood smokers restaurant is on your right past the
Neither. Linux. One last question. Super Nin- Send nominations to which operate 24 hours a day. gas station.
Snakes on a Plane. What did tendo or Sega Genesis?
March 7, 2007 Page 7

Money Worries Ambassadors to the World Lily Giddings bassadors

Joanne Lambert helps with a smile Staff Reporter are there to
Kevin Duffy give pro-
The first visit to a college is one of spective stu-
Staff Reporter the most important deciding factors dents candid
Nestled in the foyer of Guggen- for many prospective students. The answers,
heim Hall sits Joanne Lambert, ready students get to experience a part of things they
to take on the challenges of the day. college life, decide if they feel like need to
Students come to visit Joanne when they fit in, and enjoy the campus. know about
they have a problem with their fiscal Therefore, colleges take the first visit the school.
account, so they are often on edge. Her very seriously. They are a
personable and understanding charac- The Colorado School of Mines big part of
ter quickly makes all who walk into is no exception. They take pains to the admis-
her office at home, as she works with ensure that prospective students have sions pro-
students to remedy any situation. the best opportunity to experience cess; they
For the past three and half years, the campus. “The most effective way can really
Joanne has worked at CSM, manag- to see if you fit in on campus is to help the new
Kevin Duffy/ Oredigger
ing student accounts. Although many actually visit and see for yourself if student con-
Joanne Lambert helps stu-
students come into fiscal services you are comfortable,” says Sarah An- nect to the
dents with fiscal services.
complaining about money, Joanne’s drews, Student Ambassador Program school in
favorite part of her job is the personal Joanne expressed her mindset: “You coordinator. a different
interaction she are sitting with a per- The student ambassadors are way.”
has with stu- “I understand what son who has self-worth; given the responsibility of ensuring Student
dents. Joanne it is like to be a college I honor and respect their that the students who come to visit ambas-
exclaims; “I views as an individual as get all the information that they need sadors are
student under a lot of I work with them to solve to make an informed college choice. hired start-
what it is like pressure, I try to make their problems. Most im- Ambassadors lead individual student ing the sec- Courtesy Sarah Andrews
to be a college things as easy as possible portantly, though, I greet tours throughout the year, as well as ond semes- “It gives me the opportunity to spread my Caribbean
student under a people with a warm smile large group tours of the campus and ter of their warmth and friendliness,” said Indar Singh, a Student
for the students.” and strive to be a good departments at the Preview CSM and f r e s h m a n Ambassador, working at Discover CSM.
lot of pressure,
I try to make listener.” With students as Discover CSM programs. year. “I love
things as easy as possible for the the top priority, it is clear to see why “CSM is unique for its individual being an Ambassador because it They are able to connect with the
students.” This give and take manner they always leave her office with a tours. Many colleges only offer group shows prospective students that there students on a different level, sharing
allows her to approach situations from smile. tours. This way, it’s more personal, are indeed girls at this school,” said their own experiences at Mines to give
the student’s point of view. and the students can really get a feel Marilou Canon, a freshman Student a deeper perspective to the visit.
Joanne knows that finances are for the aspects of Mines that they are Ambassador. Currently, the program “I joined the Ambassador pro-
often a very emotional issue. The
root of many problems, however, is
CALLING most interested in,” said Andrews.
Aside from the tours and programs,
has 60 ambassadors, including senior
ambassadors, who help train new
gram to give prospective students an
“insider’s” perspective of the School

a lack of information. Whether it’s student ambassadors do direct mail- hires. Student ambassadors are from of Mines. As an incoming fresh-
about CSM billing procedure, student ings, to keep contact with interested all age groups and majors at Mines. men, I would have loved to know

refunds, or just general questions, students, as well as phone-a-thons, They are friendly people who enjoy the best places to study and eat, for
she is ready to work with students in calling accepted students to allow for the social aspect of the job. Britton Es- example. As an Ambassador, I can
finding an answer. She also acts as a yet another coe says; “I think the share that advice with potential stu-
student advocate in financial matters, Please send Poetry opportunity “I joined the Ambassador pro- ambassadors really dents,” said Chris Peters, a Student
making sure everyone receives fair to ask ques- gram to give prospective students like the opportunity Ambassador.
and equal treatment. Corner submissions to tions about
an ‘insider’s’ perspective of the to talk to the new Friendly faces, candid answers,
When asked what her secret is the school students.” and the sincere interest that student and voice School of Mines.” ambassadors demonstrate has a major
for keeping the positive energy alive, The ambassadors
concerns. are focused on the impact on the impression that prospec-
According to Andrews; “The am- impressions of the incoming students. tive students form of CSM.

Aria in White: 1st Movement
Piece by piece, the slate is wiped clean:
Nature’s blank canvas with a shimmering gleam.
Marching quietly towards the ground at night,
Skier’s domain comes back to life.
As the white blanket is unfurled,
The travelers’ bane constricts their world.
Unassembled artillery for many a war,
Changing the landscape near and far.
Melting clay in the craftsman’s hands,
Purity destroyed by the shifting sands.
~Benjamin M. Weilert
Page 8 March 7, 2007

The ost Disting

The Best EPICS Professors

Robert Knecht
The Best McBride Professors
Graham Closs
Ted Smathers The Best Math Professo
John Curtis
Heather Barker
Meridee Cecil Michael Colagrosso
Qi Han
The Best NHV Dinesh Mehta
The Best Economics and
Toni Lefton
Business Professors
Dan Miller
Cigdem Gurgur
Rose Pass John Tilton
Michael Heeley
Sue Tyburski Michael Walls
Ed Balistreri

The Best Chemistry

The Best Physics I Professor:
Chris Kelso
Daniel Knauss
The Best Physics 2 Professor:
The Best Chemical
Vince Kuo
Engineering Professors:

Ronald Miller
The Best Earth and Environmental
Annette Bunge Systems Professor:
(tie) Chris Shorey
Month 7, 2007 Page 9

guished Professors
TOP 10 This data was ac-
surveys. The “Ten
ALFRED W. EUSTES III PE502 Most Demanding
ors LINCOLN CARR PHGN499 Instructors” were
chosen by taking
JORG DREWES ESGN603 a ratio of students
professor “Very
SOCTT KIEFFER MNGN408 Demanding.” The
“Best Professors”
EDWARD CECIL PH350 were chosen by tak-
D.H. GORDON LIFL118 ing a ratio of stu-
dents who said their
LINDA BATTALORA PEGN310 professor was “Su-



Professors in the above list were ranked “Superior” across the board by every student in at least one class.
Page 10 March 7, 2007

Nightlife Wisdom DVD Releases

March 6th
Case Stays Cold
Sean Kelly a big interest
-Borat (R)
Staff Columnist in solving the
-Fast Food Nation (R) code. When
Hello everyone! My name is Sean about all these venues is that the under -Let’s Go to Prison (R) he does, co-
Kelly and until I graduate in May, I will 21 crowd can partake as well. Now, ON worker Paul
be giving you my words of nightlife TO DENVER! March 13th Avery (Rob-
wisdom learned in the last five years of I know it’s can be difficult to get into ert Downey
my existence. In these articles I will do downtown Denver, but trust me, it is well -Casino Royale (PG-13) Jr.) takes no-
my best to educate you as to the nightlife worth it. If you want to meet some girls -The Holiday (PG-13) tice.
offered in Golden and Denver. I won’t (or guys) in bulk, I strongly recommend -Shortbus (unrated) The killer
have time to cover everything I know Croc’s on Blake Street. It’s got a great calls himself
about Boulder, Ft. Collins, and Summit Mexican food offering and a dance floor Zodiac, and
County nightlife so I’ll keep it close to so you can grab some grub and get your
home and focus on my personal favor-
ites. That being said, I strongly encour-
groove on. This place is famous for their
cheap drinks and laid-back atmosphere.
CD Releases the language
Courtesy Paramount Pictures of his notes
age all of you to take what little free time This is the kind of place where you can March 6th with his confessions creates panic.
Andrew Aschenbrenner
you have and spend it productively. So if dress real nice or real simple and no one The movie largely fails to capture
you’re ready to put down the homework, cares. It’s also a great place to learn to Entertainment Editor
-Finger Eleven this, instead focusing on the details
turn off the video games, and get social dance. The dance floor gets packed and Them vs. You vs. Me The Zodiac murders took place in of the crimes and the characters of
I offer my knowledge. there will be plenty of intoxicated indi- -KoRn the San Francisco bay area in the late those involved.
If you want to stay close to home viduals nearby so feel free to look like MTV Unplugged 1960s and early 1970s. They were Mark Ruffalo plays David Tos-
and hang out with the friends, check an idiot on the floor. Just one word of -Relient K never solved, and the ciphers that chi, a San Francisco homicide de-
out the local scene. At Table Mountain advice: if you dance badly and someone Five Score And Seven the killer sent to local newspapers tective assigned to the case. Toschi
Inn you can partake of the happy hour smiles at you, pretend you’re doing it on Years Ago continue to puzzle and fascinate. battles with Avery and struggles
specials Monday through Friday from purpose, try to make them laugh, then -Notorious B.I.G. Paramount Pictures’ new movie against information barriers between
3-6p.m. This happy hour consists of strike up a conversation. Croc’s has Greatest Hits Zodiac attempts to capture that police departments as he tries to
$4 food, $3 mesa margaritas, and $2 the most consistently friendly people fascination. The movie’s story is solve the case.
draft beer and well drinks. If you want you can meet at a big place in Denver. March 13th based on actual case files and San Zodiac promises a thriller with
to head to something a little later with Lastly, this place has my favorite drink Francisco Chronicle cartoonist a cold case twist. What is delivered
more to do for the sub-21 crowd check specials, beers are usually a couple bucks -Modest Mouse Robert Graysmith’s book about the instead is a rambling character drama
out Jillian’s happy hour at the Colorado for domestics and you can get a hold of We Were Dead Even Before killings. that never heats up. It’s a very well
Mills mall. From 4-7p.m. (M-F) and a strong Tokyo Iced Tea for about $5 The Ship Sank Jake Gyllenhaal plays Gray- made movie, but it ultimately leaves
again at 10p.m.-midnight they have $2 (just don’t drink these in bulk, I know -Aqualung smith, a young cartoonist at the the viewer unsatisfied as it fails to
bowling games with $1 shoe rentals. this from experience). Although Croc’s Memory Man time of the first murder. When the develop the story. If you’re inter-
During the earlier happy hour you can is a wonderful place full of fond (and -James Morrison Chronicle receives the first Zodiac ested in the case, it’s worth seeing,
also grab a pool table for $3/hour, along forgotten) memories, if you want a little Undiscovered letter and cipher, Graysmith takes but don’t expect to be wowed.
with $1 Coronas, $2.50 draft beers, and more class you need to clean up a bit and

Arriving Shortly
$3.50 house wells and wines. Speaking head elsewhere.
of bowling, I highly recommend calling If you see the suburban Denver
up the friends and heading to Golden lifestyle and all the pretty people, I’ll
Bowl from 9-11 PM Monday nights tell you where to party with them. The
for College Bowling. During this time Lure on 15th and Blake has amazing
you can get $1 shoe rentals, $1 draft food, a very nice interior. It can be March 16th inspiration. That creepy doll thing
domestics, and $2 games. It has been pricey, but if you come on a Tuesday isn’t exactly a new concept, but this
refurbished in the last year or so and is night they extend happy hour until Premonition will be good enough to confirm your
a good place to relieve that stress from 10pm. If you want to check out a nice Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer previously unjustified distrust of
CAPA. Last, but definitely not least, is large club, go to Rise. Rise is two levels, Drama creepy old puppets.
the Yardhouse. If you haven’t been to has professional dancers (what little Rated PG-13
this gem you are truly missing out. Daily clothing they have stays on) and decent I Think I Love My Wife
from 3-6p.m. and Friday and Saturday techno music. If you want to check out Starring: Sandra Bullock, Julian Fox Searchlight Pictures
from 10p.m.-close you can enjoy one something more upscale and intimate, McMahon, Amber Valletta Comedy
of their 115 draft beers for $3.25/pint. head over to Hush. This place doesn’t Directed by Mennan Yapo Rated R
Well drinks are $4.25, and the 20+ house have a sign, so look for the velvet ropes Summary: Linda (Bullock) suffers
martinis are $5.25 (and delicious). They on Larimer and 14th. If you want to sip the terrible and untimely death of her
also have an extensive list of very tasty martinis make your way to Tryst. Tryst husband, only to find him alive the
half price appetizers. Out of all the local is a classy lounge with good music, a lot next day. Each time she sleeps, she
places this place is my personal favorite; of people, and great tasting drinks. The transfers between two realities before
the atmosphere is nice but still down to Jet Hotel is always jumping on Friday and after the death of her husband.
earth so jeans and a hoody are good for and Saturday nights, and if you can get Frantic and suspicious, Linda rushes
when you want to have a couple beers yourself into the downstairs you will not to solve the ‘inconsistencies’ of her
and watch some sports. The great thing be disappointed. husband death before it becomes real
in both realms.
Impression: It’s a clever little plot
Chase Hoffman and all. Sandra ain’t bad either. But
this just isn’t that exciting. Anyone
Asst. Editor-in-Chief
with all 46 chromosomes can figure
out the ending half way through this
March 9th
Dead Silence
Universal Pictures
Horror Courtesy
Warner Bros. Pictures
Rated R
Action Epic
Rated R Starring: Chris Rock, Kerry Wash-
Starring: Ryan Kwanten, Amber
Valletta, Donnie Wahlberg ington, Gina Torres
Starring: Gerard Butler, Lena Directed by Chris Rock
Directed by James Wan (also
Headey, David Wenham Summary: Richard (Rock) and
directed Saw)
Directed by Zack Snyder (also Brenda (Torres) are a happily married
directed Dawn of the Dead) couple with little excitement. Along
There was a ventriloquist, Mary
Summary: A re-account of the bat- rolls Nikki (Washington), an old
Shaw; Who had no children, only
tle of Thermopylae, a defense of 300 friend and crush of Richard. Richard
Spartan Warriors led by King Leoni- starts day-dreaming of his single days
One day, a boy strangely disap-
das against the Persian Empire bent on and thinks to himself, “I love my
peared; When it came to blame, she
conquering the known world. wife…I think I love my wife.”
was volunteered.
Impression: Probably the most Impression: The plot is thin, but
They cut out her tongue and buried
important element here is contribution don’t mis-underestimate (that’s for
her dead; Her dolls slept next to her
of Frank Miller and the style that his you, G-dub) the innovation of Chris
eternal bed.
graphic novels demand. Sin City was Rock. I know, Mr. Rock’s filmogra-
Since then, this town is shaded by
an eye-popper and an instant classic phy is less than impressive, but give
witchery; Constantly plagued by vile
among many. The hopes are to dupli- the man his due. He does have more
cate that success here with an equally creative control here, which is good
Impression: This is the same dude
badass story, famous throughout the for everyone.
who made Saw happen. Apparently,
that creepy talking doll was a bit of
March 7, 2007 Page 11

Reel Geek Oscars a Snooze

A film geek writes about geeks on film Andrew Aschenbrenner
Entertainment Editor
Jen Schneider The 79th Academy Awards were pretty Martin Scorsese finally won an Oscar,
dull, in case you didn’t watch. A year with and The Departed took home four statu-
many great movies and tough competition ettes. Pan’s Labyrinth missed out on the
One of my film students said he longer than to blink, she’d threaten to in hope. suggested a more exciting ceremony, Best Foreign Film award, but won three
saw Little Miss Sunshine last week. pull that car over, dammit. The themes of the films are similar: but instead the Oscars felt like a simple others, including Cinematography.
When I asked him what he thought of In short, she made us completely both feature slightly rotund, bespec- parade of people across the stage. As for the Oredigger picks from the
it, he replied; “It made me squirm.” I miserable. tacled little girls besieged by the weird- First-time host Ellen DeGeneres tried February 7th issue, Chase led the way
hadn’t seen the movie Plus, we all shared ness of their families. Both deal with her best to inject life into the subdued by picking thirteen categories correctly.
yet, but I had heard its hotel rooms at every difficult issues present underneath the event, but she fell short. To be fair, she Bruce and I picked nine correctly, and
premise, and figured I nightly stop (Ruby surface of many, if not most, American didn’t have much to work with. The Adam picked eight correctly.
knew pretty well what was loaded, but she families: despair, distance, failure, order of the awards left five of the six Here’s hoping for many great films in
he meant. was also extremely neglect. And both have the “squirm” major honors to the end, and it’s always the year ahead, and a better, more exciting
I remember being frugal). Ruby’s a big factor (I don’t think Solondz has made boring to watch filler sketches in between 80th Academy Awards.
ten years old or so, and gal, so she snored a film that doesn’t). presentations of technical awards.
being packed into my all night long, then The difference is that Solondz’s
grandmother Ruby’s rudely roused us from film is bleak: it leaves us with no easy
Plymouth station wagon our beds at 6am so resolution, no happy coming together
for a road trip from we could get on the in the way Sunshine does. We are left
Boise, Idaho, to San road. with a perverse taste of disquietude at
Diego, California, with There are more the end of Dollhouse, the future of Dawn
stops planned all the details to this trip that Weiner (Heather Matarazzo) uncertain.
way down the coast. I won’t bore you with Furthermore, we are certainly left with
She let me bring my here--one involving the sense that something disturbing is
best friend Vicki Parker, some not-so-virgin happening beneath the façade of the ma- N E W E XT E N DE D
and tricked out the back Courtesy terial wealth and airbrushed appearance
Mai-Tais, another
of the wagon with a scratchy wool involving Clint Eastwood in Carmel, of the suburban 1990s family.
blanket and pillows for us to lay on, a California. Anyway, my point is that And it probably was. We all have
stack of People magazines, and a cooler when I saw Little Miss Sunshine—the eccentricity and liminal figures in our MON-FRI 3-7p.m.
with cans of coke, cool ranch Doritos, ultimate family roadtrip movie—I didn’t families (the story above is the tamest $1.50 16oz Domestic Drafts $1.50 Thin Cheese Slices
and Oreos. Me and Vicky were pretty feel squirmy. I felt at home. of Ruby tales). So I’m glad Solondz is $1.75 16oz Import Drafts $3.95 10 Piece Wings
dang excited. I hate to give too many details about telling these stories. It’s important to
Ruby is seriously eccentric, but she’s Sunshine here, because its beauty is in see our own realities represented in the 10% Off With Student I.D. *Not Valid With Any Other Special*

Huge Slices &Pie

also loaded, so we figured we’d prob- its details: the horn that won’t stop culture—it can help us feel less isolated,
ably score some good souvenirs. And honking, the mute teenage son, the less fringe.
Disneyland was on the itinerary. What amazing final dance routine (watch But I don’t enjoy Solondz’s stories

gg e r
the way I did Little Miss Sunshine,

ten-year-old wouldn’t be thrilled? out, Napoleon Dynamite). The meat of

E v e n B
What I hadn’t counted on was be- this movie is in its characters and their whose happy ending neither disap-
ing wickedly carsick the entire time. struggles and triumphs, rather than in the points nor cloys. We know the family’s

All I wanted to do was sleep so that I plot itself, which is why it can get away awkwardness will persist. We know
wouldn’t barf every five minutes, but with so many continuity errors. more strangeness is to come. But we
that was a total affront to Ruby’s sense No, I won’t summarize the plot. also know that families can overcome
of what a road trip sightseeing adventure
was supposed to be. She made sure
Rather, I think it makes more sense to
compare Sunshine with another film
their individual weirdness to bond to-
gether as one, to support and love one
2 One Topping Slices
we were fully appreciating every red- about modern American family angst: another in the face of the larger culture’s & A 16oz
wood, every freeway exit, every coastal the 1995 Todd Solondz film Welcome weirdness.
Domestic Draft

feature. If I even dared lean my head to the Dollhouse, and to talk about why Even if it is to load Grandpa’s cold, NOT VALID WITH ANY OTHER OFFER

against the window, or shut my eyes one ends in cold cynicism, the other dead body into the back of the van.
Colorado School of Mines Students

Just show your current Colorado School of Mines I.D.

Hours M-F 8-9; Sat. 8-5; Sun 10-4
( Safeway Center Behind Burger King)

$9.99 Haircut
Welcome Back

601 16 th st.

Golden, Co.

Offer expires: 03/28/2007

Page 12 March 7, 2007

Editorials Policy

The Oredigger is a
designated public
forum. Student
editors have the
authority to make
all content decisions
without censorship
or advance approval.
Shaemus Gleason, Editor-in-Chief Chase Hoffman, Assistant Editor-in-Chief Sara Post, Copy Editor Zach Aman, Editorials Editor
Hilary Brown, Features Editor Bruce Bugbee, Sports Editor Konrad Klett, Assistant Sports Editor Jason Fish, News Editor
Chris Phillips, Business Manager Andrew Aschenbrenner, Entertainment Editor

Oscars Gone Political Duffy’s Corner

Adam Freeland and the claims of science, I try to avoid gree of accuracy, the past 30 or so years,
the “fads”. The current mentality be- and is capable of predicting for at least Kevin Duffy usual “fluff” that occurs in many
Staff Writer
hind Global Warming seems to play the next 10-15 years with a reasonable Staff Writer interviews. Unfortunately, Resi-
Al Gore, who “used to be the next on the guilt that people are so ready degree of accuracy. If the model fails The Resident Assistant selection dence Life has made it a standing
President of the United States” (despite to feel. With a more secular society and needs to be modified, we would process at the Colorado School of policy to base their decision solely
saying in 2000 “I offer my concession”), pulling forward, and religion taking a need to restart the time period. We need Mines is broken. The process seeks upon this criterion. Several business
was the star of his own film in which back seat, it is not hard to see how this a model good enough to predict, not one to filter out the numerous applicants professionals, not associated with
he used the word I more time than I ideology could take root. That aside, we so good that it could have predicted. into a pool of deserving and capable CSM, almost fell over laughing, in
can count. He proceeded to lecture his need to look at the science and politics With this model, we would then be individuals. The CSM community both amusement and disgust, at the
audience, both in the film and in the behind it. better able to assess the situation. If deserves to know that this process notion of a professional interview
theatre, on how the end of what we call Global Warming is, most likely, we are at fault to a reasonable degree, is performed under the leadership of being conducted in this manner. One
our society is at hand. Global Climate happening. That is not the dispute. The and action needs to be taken, we would fifth and sixth year seniors through a executive who wished to remain
Change (formerly Global Warming), dispute lies in the human contribution then know precisely what action. If we system of innuendo and trivial con- anonymous said, “…if I were asked
not the wrath of God, is going to lead to it. There is not a uniform scientific are not at fault, then we can move on. demnation. Responsible leadership to interview in this manner for a
us to our end. consensus. There is, however, a uniform Premature action based on a perceived is called for in student life. position, I would pack my bags and
Al Gore, in more ways than one, print media consensus. There have been scientific consensus has yielded horrible The RA’s perform the fundamen- go work for their competitor. Un-
reminded me of the stereotypical “end numerous documented cases of scien- results before. From the early 1900s to tal job of keeping order and sanity in fortunately the students of CSM do
times” minister. He spoke of a horrible tists being threatened, with their jobs just after WWII many states had poli- a hall of 20 plus screaming freshman. not have that luxury. It is not as if
future that awaits us if we do not repent and grants, if they attempt to publish cies of sterilizing “imbeciles” in order For their service, they are awarded you can apply for in RA position in
now. He used religious-like guilt to anything contrary to human-caused to prevent their reproduction. Over 65 a contract with CSM valued at over Boulder, you must demand change
make us feel that we are solely respon- Global Warming. I do not claim that thousand were sterilized against their $5,000. Clearly, this amount displays and accountability in your own
sible. He showed us a way to avoid all scientists speaking out do not have will; all because science said that they the level of seriousness the adminis- organization.”
that horrible future. And, perhaps most ulterior motives. For us to have good were inferior. Politicians, then and now, tration places on the role of the RA. Further compounding this disas-
important, he has no intention of follow- science, especially in an area that could are all too eager to be on the side of sci- One would assume then, that such trous process is the fact that trained
ing his own preaching. For all of this, have such dire economic and global ence. Science is not bad; it has bulled a position of prestige and responsi- administrative faculty of CSM are
he received an Oscar (along with his consequences, we need to have blind us form a small 175 foot first flight in bility would demand an interview not directly involved with the pro-
movie’s song). This, along with ‘Fahr- science. Scientists need to not know 1903 to sending a crew to the moon in process based on substantive criteria, cess. The RA selection process is
enheit 911’ has led be to conclude that where their grant money is coming from, 1969. Science will save us, but the pos- judged by qualified individuals. The completely handled by the RA se-
you need to make a leftist propaganda whether it is an oil company or a politi- sible over-publicized pseudo-science current system, however, leaves lection committee, which is chaired
film to win Best Documentary, or just cian. We need them to come up with a much to be desired. by current Hall directors and staffed
and rush to judgment of global warming
be really, really fat. model that both would have predicted The current selections process in- by returning RA’s. While everyone
Looking back on the last 100 years has a potential to ruin the American
climate alterations, to a reasonable de- volves a paper application and three agrees that the Hall directors should
economy. We must be careful.
separate interviews with current Hall have input in the process, the idea

What McBride Stands For

Directors of Residence Life. The of giving them absolute control
idea behind so many interviews is to over who receives the contract is
weed out candidates in a progressive sickening. Bluntly put, they do not
manner until the staff is finally able possess the professional discipline
to award contracts. This seemingly to differentiate personal bias and
Dr. Loring Abeyta the humanities and social sciences on of the McBride pedagogy and curricu-
just process is shattered when one social innuendo with the skills nec-
Op-Ed Author a science and engineering campus, lum. This allows McBride scholars to
examines the specifics. The first essary to perform the duties of the
Jane’s mother was curious about how explore in depth the complex issues
interview, dubbed the “large group position. Rejecting a highly qualified
On Thursday, Feb. 22, I had a the Program staffs courses for a minor that exist at the intersection of science,
interview,” is an evening of 30 or individual at the first stage of the
delightful meeting with a high school in Public Affairs. I explained to both engineering, and human communi-
more individual candidates play- interview process because they do
Junior and her mother, whom I will Mrs. Doe and Jane that the Program ties. The outcome is that after their
ing get-to-know you games such as not feel an immediate social bond,
call Jane and Mrs. Doe, regarding the has a Tutorial Committee which is graduation, McBride alums enter the
telephone and charades. The Hall is not an acceptable answer to the
McBride Honors Program in Public comprised of faculty from across the world of public affairs (including
Directors and their RA followers CSM community.
Affairs for Engineers. Jane and her CSM academic and administrative industry, government, non-profit,
herd the applicants around like cattle, The ultimate goal in Residence
mother were “college shopping,” and departments. While it is expected and other civic organizations) with
directing them to various stations. Life is to create an elite assemblage
Jane’s outstanding accomplishments that Tutorial Committee members the dual advantage of expertise in the
One station, for example, invites of individuals who laugh all the way
in a New England high school put her will teach McBride courses during language, method, and contributions
the applicants to draw their favorite to the bank; knowing their social
in a position of being able to choose their terms of service, the Program of science and engineering as well as
animal and describe why they are eccentricity unjustly catapulted
among any number of top-ranking also brings in adjunct faculty experts public affairs. They can then serve
represented by it. Yet another station them to success. It is time to get
colleges in the nation. The Colorado from the surrounding community of the public good by “interpreting”
invites the applicants to envision real, and take off the boxing gloves.
School of Mines was on their itinerary, colleges, industry, and professional between the world of science and en-
they are stranded on the opposite The students of CSM deserve and
and they were particularly interested organizations to lead seminars as Prin- gineering – which has an increasingly
side of a raging river and must use demand better than this; we insist
in the McBride Honors Program. As cipal or Associate Moderators. The prominent place in the discourse of
wooden blocks to cross safely. on accountability.
the Interim Principal Tutor and Direc- credentials and experience of these public affairs – and the world of civic
On a certain level, this foolish- Please send Duffy your
tor of the McBride Honors Program, faculty experts make them valuable involvement in which they have been
ness can simply be dismissed as the local concerns:
talking about the Program with pro- contributors to the learning environ- educated through the McBride Honors
spective students is one of my regular ment for McBride scholars. In any Program.
duties that I particularly enjoy since given semester, the Tutorial Commit- This is what is unique about the
I get to meet young people who are tee will be comprised of science and McBride Honors Program, and what McBride graduates are different introduces them to a common founda-
among the top students in their high engineering faculty as well as faculty gives it the vitality for which it has than typical college or university tion of knowledge that will retain its
schools and are clearly motivated to with expertise in political science, been noted over 28 years on the CSM graduates who go into public affairs relevance through the three and a half
achieve excellence in their college economics, international relations, campus. The McBride Program serves and have majored in, for example, years that they are in the Program.
careers. or other areas in the liberal arts. The as a “nexus” within which some of the political science. McBride students In their Junior and Senior years, the
Many of the details that I discussed proportions of the represented disci- most vital dialogue about the interface major in the sciences and/or engi- students have choices among courses,
with Jane and Mrs. Doe can be found plines will vary from one semester to of science, technology, and human neering, and are starting at a different thus allowing them to follow a track
at the McBride Honors Program web the next, depending on the moderators communities occurs. Dr. Robert E. point of inquiry about public affairs that appeals to their future career
page, located at http://www.mines. that we bring in from outside the cam- D. Woolsey, a member of our Tutorial and public policy because they are interests more directly. For example,
edu/academic/mcb_honors/. Howev- pus, but there is always a mixture of Committee a number of years ago and entering the field from a completely students choose between participating
er, I do want to highlight some of the science, engineering, social science, a Mines Emeritus Professor, said that different vantage point than their peers in a foreign area study that allows
features of the Program that I covered and humanities faculty. the McBride Honors Program “…is who are liberal arts majors. them a cultural, academic, and social
with Jane Doe and her mother. These diverse faculty members of founded on the ideal that pure techni- During the course of their studies, immersion in another country, or the
Mrs. Doe had questions that any the Tutorial Committee team up to cal problems do not exist – only those McBride scholars do have a curricu- students go on a one-week trip to
parent would ask about the governance teach seminar courses that emphasize embedded in political, cultural, ethi- lum that all enrolled students follow, Washington, D.C. as part of a seminar
and professional oversight of the Mc- student discussion and active learning. cal, and moral problems. Our purpose as would be expected of any honors on U.S. foreign and domestic policy.
Bride Honors Program. Particularly From the Program’s inception, the is to produce a graduate who will both program at the college level. The
students take a Freshman seminar that See MCBRIDE, Page 13
because this is an honors program in seminar format has been the hallmark know and act on this reality.”
March 7, 2007

Letters to the Editor

Dear Editor, Skateboarding on campus is against still pick it up on occasion, just to see
McBride Program
Continued from Page 12 Committee meetings. While admin-
I wanted to share information on Both trips are partially subsidized istratively they don’t have a vote, they
campus rules and you can be ticketed for if it had gotten any better. This week’s
Autodesk’s latest commitment to fur- by the McBride Honors Program, certainly have voice, and have made
it, something that has been sent multiple article definitely swayed me away from
thering design and engineering educa- meaning that the students have an valuable contributions to our Program
times in emails to the entire student your publication.
tion. I understand your school has a large opportunity for in-depth study through discussions of curriculum, the role of
body. Jumping on your friend’s bumper In specific, as I turned to the 2nd page
student population interested in pursuing domestic or international travel at a the McBride Program on the CSM
and riding there while he is moving is of the article, and found the paragraph
careers in engineering. Students can fraction of what it would cost them campus, and student involvement.
illegal. Parking in a no-parking zone describing Mr. Francisco’s DUI charge
log on to if they engaged in these activities This McBride student commitment
is illegal. Parking in a reserved space and probation, I simply rolled my eyes at
for free software downloads, tutorials, independently. is exemplified by Hilary Brown’s edi-
without the proper parking permit is a the irrelevant revelation of this fact.
job postings and other ways to connect As my meeting with Jane and Mrs. torial. Her summary of concerns took
ticketable offense. Mr. Francisco’s life outside of the
with peers and faculty across the world. Doe came to an end, I emphasized much thought and effort. While there
The people in this group claim that Mines campus has absolutely nothing to
If anyone on your editorial staff is inter- that the McBride Honors Program are some inaccuracies in her editorial
public safety has harassed them, when do with anything, and is of no concern to
ested in knowing more about the latest inspires a high level of commitment there are many valuable points, as
all of the complaints seem to be about anybody but Mr. Francisco, his family,
Autodesk technology for students, please to the Program on the part of McBride well. What is important to note about
getting in trouble for breaking the law. and the Jefferson County court system,
contact me at julieanna.little@edelman. students. We have many alumni who Ms. Brown’s editorial is that she wrote
Now, I’m not saying that public safety and in the event that it relates to terms
com Many thanks! continue to contribute to the Program, it in the best of the McBride tradition.
never makes a mistake, or never crosses of his employment, then to his Superiors
Sincerely, both financially and through their She is voicing her concerns through
the line, they’re human, they make mis- at Mines.
JulieAnna Little Edelman for Au- participation in McBride events. For one of the most important institutions
takes. However, I feel that this group Bringing up Mr. Francisco’s record
todesk example, our guest speaker at the of any free democratic society: an
needs to take a step back, look at the has no purpose, and does nothing to con-
Freshman Reception in November, uncensored media. She has raised is-
situation with unclouded eyes and decide tribute to this article but to be a cowardly
2006 was a notable McBride gradu- sues that are indeed of concern to all
if the action they are proposing is the swipe at him. Mr. Aman’s abuse of the
Dear Editor, ate. In 1982, Dr. Dean Thomas was stakeholders in the McBride Honors
proper action. If they have a legitimate Freedom of Press has further disgusted
I logged on to Facebook the other a member of the original graduating Program. In writing the editorial,
grievance against public safety, then they me with the overall poor quality that
morning. I always take the time to read class of the McBride Honors Program. Ms. Brown has exemplified for her
should start by going to Nan Braddock, your publication passes on as well writ-
that first page after you login that tells He went on to receive his doctorate at peers one of the primary outcomes
Director of Public Safety, and voicing ten news reporting and has removed any
you what you’re buddies have been up the Institute for Theoretical Physics at that we hope to see in our McBride
their concern. If Director Braddock interest I ever had in reading it. If Mr.
to. And I find that one of my buddies the State University of New York, and Honors Program students: the will-
cannot resolve the issue, then they need Aman had a problem with Mr. Francisco,
joined a group titled “I have been ha- is now on the staff of the Institute for ingness and courage to “project and
to find out who the next person up the then using the Oredigger to “get back at
rassed by Mines Public Safety.” Now, Defense Analysis. Dr. Thomas has test the moral and social implications
chain of command would be and go talk him” by means of publicizing private
I have no problem with folks wanting remained dedicated to the McBride of their …professional judgments
to them. I truly doubt that it would ever misdeeds is certainly an inappropriate
to go somewhere and complain about Honors Program over the years, which and activities” (as stated in the CSM
become necessary to spread slanderous way of making retribution.
anything. However, it is this group’s has been demonstrated by his return undergraduate bulletin description of
gossip to the news agencies, dean, or If your goal is to uncover all the
stated goal to gain enough support to go to the CSM campus on two occasions, the McBride Honors Program). In
board of trustees if the grievance is “dirty secrets” that relatively unpopu-
to the dean, board of trustees, and all lo- including this most recent visit, to speaking her mind, Ms. Brown has
legitimate. lar faculty and staff may have, and
cal news stations in an effort to discredit speak to McBride students. done just this.
Sincerely, if you simply wish to continue the
Mines Public Safety. This group sees a Our current McBride students In that regard, I do hope that after
Christopher Ekberg “good riddance” cry in response to Bob
problem with Public Safety doing their exemplify their commitment to the leaving our meeting at the McBride
Francisco’s departure, then I wish you all
job. I hate to be the one to rain on their McBride Honors Program in various House, Jane and Ms. Doe found that
the ill will in the world, and I hope that
parade, but if you break the law, you ways. We have a very active group week’s copy of the Oredigger and
Dear Editor, your pitiful little mudslinging tabloid is
deserve to be punished. of student representatives to the were able to see the McBride Program
I was less than impressed with your simply laughed at and eventually fades
I read down the wall, reading their Program, and these student represen- “in action” through the contributions
cover article “Student Life Sees More into obscurity.
complaints, and there may be one tatives are given the opportunity to of one McBride student to the arena of
Changes” published in the most recent Sincerely,
legitimate complaint in a list of 15. participate in the Program’s Tutorial public debate on the CSM campus.
issue of the Oredigger. While I’ve never Andrew J. Martin

Rolling through stop signs is illegal. been a big fan of the Oredigger, I would

J u s t S t o p Ta l k i n g In the editorial entitled “Improv-

ing McBride: A Great Program With
McBride Honors Program and this
is not true. Dr. McBride was the
Andrew Aschenbrenner pro-gay rights, and anti-gun, Giuliani has Gonzales.After eight U.S. attorneys were
Room to Improve” that ran in the President of the Colorado School of
Entertainment Editor taken the lead among Republicans in the fired at the end of last year despite good
race for the nomination. performance reviews, his Department February 21 issue of The Oredigger, Mines during the program’s found-
What would a rant be without a of Justice has come under scrutiny. there were two factual errors. ing. Dr. Tom Philipose worked with
First of all, this is in no way suggests
that the people mentioned have no right criticism of another stupid quote from The scandal-in-the-making has drawn First, the statement that regard- multiple faculty members across
to say what they said. Free speech is the our President? Bush recently added to Congressional subpoenas for Gonzales, ed the 28 McBride “moderators” many departments to create the pro-
greatest element of this country, and his many statements of incompetency. who has replied that he was too busy to was actually talking about the 28 gram. Dr. McBride had always been
all forms must be allowed, however He must have decided that his utter denial respond to those pesky legal demands for members of the McBride Tutorial a strong supporter of the program
threatening. This is merely a rant and a of reality wasn’t enough. Comparing the information. Said Gonzales, “I think the Committee ( and it was renamed in his honor in
suggestion that the people mentioned war in Iraq to the Revolutionary War is American people would lose...if I spend mcb_honors/committee.html). the mid-1980s.
would be better off if they just kept their like comparing Bush to Ronald Reagan. all my time responding to subpoenas.” Second, Dr. McBride was re- The Oredigger apologizes for
mouth shut. Sounds nice, but it just doesn’t work. How Translation: “I’m too busy to follow the garded as the “founder” of the these errors.
It’s been an interesting time of quotes about you try comparing quagmires to law.” What a surprise, it’s another Bush
and events, but let’s start with James quagmires, and traitorous fools to traitor- administration official denying that they

A Note from the Editorials Board

Cameron. Saying that you’ve found the ous fools? have any responsability for anything. It’s
tomb of Jesus without undeniable justifi- Also making the headlines, this time ok. I can rest easy in the knowledge that
cation is not smart or respectful. Cameron for a rather tame quote, is Ann Coulter, if I ignored a subpoena, I would be held
The article regarding Bob Fran- Oredigger for the past 87 years to
decided that he wanted to make a movie everyone’s favorite faux-conservative in contempt and arrested. What a nice
firebrand. Her quote at the Conservative present from the person who is supposed cisco that printed in the February 21 abide by the highest journalistic
more ridiculous than Titanic, and call it a issue of The Oredigger discussed
Political Action Conference (CPAC), to symbolize law in America. standards in all situations.
documentary. Mr. Cameron, call me back
which referred to Democratic Presidential Finally, we have one of my favorite multiple, and factual, aspects of In this situation, we chose to
when you have a reliable script.
Next on the list is John McCain, who candidate John Edwards as a faggot, was people of all. For those of you who don’t Bob’s tenure at Mines. print only the information that we
has recently decided that he can make almost funny. The use of the word and the know, Michelle Bachmann is a newly We have worked with Bob on had multiple, confirmed sources for,
everyone in the Republican party forget accusation wasn’t the funny part. What elected U.S. Representative from Min- multiple occasions and always found though we easily could have added
everything on his voting record. Mc- was funny was that Coulter used the slur nesota. I first learned who she was when I him to be courteous and helpful; we the entourage of additional stories
Cain has looked like a fish out of water, to gain attention. Apparently insulting watched her grab the President following can assure you that our actions in no we uncovered. Furthermore, we felt
and managed to declare his candidacy 9/11 widows isn’t enough to keep up me- the State of the Union address, not letting way represented an attempt to “get it would be immoral to intention-
in the same breath in which he made it dia coverage. Maybe she’ll start spewing go for 30 seconds, until he paid her just back at” him. ally withold information from the
irrelevant. He told David Letterman’s raw sewage soon. a little bit more attention. Upon further It has been the goal of The student body.
audience, “We wasted a lot of our most Joining the fun at CPAC is fellow research, I learned that she is generally
precious treasure, which isAmerican lives wacko Newt Gingrich. Newt was recently regarded by her former colleagues in the
over there.” WastingAmerican lives. Nice in the news for advocating limitations on Minnesota Senate as a nutcase. It isn’t
touch. Especially when you have been re- First Amendment rights, specifically free hard to understand why. Her voting record
ferred to as your party’s “war candidate.” speech. Wow, Newt! That would make defies logic. Quotes like “...The black

Letters to the Editor?

Mr. McCain, you might want to decide America, let’s see, NOT AMERICA. tsunami that went across our nation on
on a platform before running around and People like Gingrich deserve to be November 7th” and her recent stunner
trying to make everybody like you. implanted with magnets and forced to prove to me that she’s the biggest nutter
Jumping on the Presidential-candi- undergo an MRI. At CPAC, Newt said in Congress (Katharine Harris RIP). She
date-with-Tourettes bandwagon is Mitt that the residents of the 9th ward of New was quoted by the St. Cloud, Minnesota
Orleans were “so uneducated and so Times as saying, “[Iran is] going to get
E-Mail “”
Romney, who announced that he was
enjoying the Hillary-Obama feud before unprepared, they literally couldn’t get out half of Iraq, and that is going to be a
attacking his fellow Republican candi- of the way of the hurricane.” Sensitive! terrorist safe haven zone where they can
dates. Apparently he was enjoying the
feud so much he decided to start his own.
To top it off, Gingrich declared that this
was a “failure of citizenship.” Doesn’t
go ahead and bring about more terrorist
attacks in the Middle East region and or go to
and click on
Maybe it’s because Romney is so behind this guy know how to think and speak then to come against the United States
in the polls, he felt like his only chance all at once? because we are their avowed enemy.”
was to lower everyone’s poll numbers. Making the list from the Bush cabi- Wow, Michelle. The next time you want
Good luck with that. Since attacking
Rudy Giuliani for being pro-abortion,
net is the most powerful lawyer in the
country: your Attorney General, Alberto
to open your mouth, reconsider. Or better
yet, just stop talking.
“Letters to the Editor.”
Page 14 March 7, 2007

CSM Baseball Off to Rocky Start in RMAC

Orediggers End Three-Game Losing Streak; Improve to 4-7 Overall
By Chris Phillips the mound. looked like it was going to end in
Business Manager CSM’s next series was another much the same way as the second
four-game series, but against Central game of the series until the eighth in-
The Colorado School of Mines Washington. This series was played ning. CWU led the game 15-6, but the
Baseball team has started the 2007 in Pueblo from Feb. 16 – 18, and the Orediggers rallied to score four runs
season with a 4-7 start (2-1 RMAC). Orediggers went 3-1 yet again. They in both the eighth and ninth innings.
The season opened on a sour note for opened the series with an 11-10 win, Despite the rally, the Orediggers
the Orediggers with three straight and then lost their last three 14-1, 3-2, weren’t able to overcome the nine-
losses, but their recent 2-1 series win and 16-14 respectively. The opener run deficit in time. CSM was led by
over Regis may be indicative of things was won by the Orediggers in the 10th Revielle with three RBIs. Rudkin,
to come. inning. The score going into the inning Naccarato and Walker all posted two
The opening series for CSM was was 9-9, and Central Washington’s RBIs apiece, and Deal, Gremmer and
played at Eastern New Mexico from Michael Johnson brought in what Hensley all had an RBI.
Feb. 9 – 11. The Orediggers lost the could have been the game-winning Conference play proved to be more
first three games of the series 3-2, 9-2, run before CSM went up to bat. The profitable for the Orediggers. In their
and 5-4, but came back to win the final Orediggers came back to win off of RMAC opening series on Mar. 3-4
game 16-12. During the first three a throwing error and a sacrifice bunt against Regis, the Orediggers went 2-1
games, CSM was led by first baseman by Naccarato. Revielle, playing left with the scores being 6-4, 17-5, and
Mike Deal (Highlands Ranch) with field for the game, led CSM with 10-3, respectively. Pitcher Cris Rog-
four runs batted in and one home run. three RBIs. Catcher Anthony Siderius ers earned his first career win for his
Center fielder Nick Walker (Denver) (Castle Rock) and Gremmer each had performance in the opening game. He
and right fielder John Naccarato one RBI for the day. Marshall Schuler had five strikeouts and allowed four
(Parker) both had two RBIs. (Anaheim, CA) earned the win with runs (one earned) and six hits during
The Orediggers’ scoring exploded one hit allowed during his one inning eight innings. The hitting was led by
during the fourth game of the series. of play. Rudkin, Walker, Deal, Gremmer and
Deal had six RBIs and two home runs, The next game proved to be dif- Owens, all of whom had one RBI.
and Naccarato had one RBI to his ficult for CSM. CWU had 12 RBIs Walker had the game-winning run
name. Designated hitter Stefan Revi- in the first part of their double-header after Rudkin drew a two-out walk in
elle and third baseman Matt Owens vs. Mines, whereas the Orediggers the ninth to set it up.
both had two RBIs. The scoring for were only able to score off of an RBI The second win of the series al-
the Orediggers was rounded out by provided by Walker. Later the same lowed the Orediggers to split the
one RBI each from second baseman day, CSM lost 3-2. They went into double header. Rudkin and Hensley
Caleb Rudkin, shortstop Aaron Grem- the seventh propelled by RBIs from had three RBIs apiece in the 10-3 Courtesy CSM Athletics
mer and catcher Scott Hensley. Matt Deal and Naccarato and with the score win. Revielle put up two RBIs, and Caleb Rudkin had three RBIs in the series against Regis
Thome pitched the winning game for tied 2-2, but CWU’s Tyler Farrington both Walker and Deal added one RBI
the Orediggers with two strikeouts, posted a two-out single RBI to bring each. Schuler earned the win to bring earned) off of seven hits during the day at 7:00 PM against CSU-Pueblo.
two earned runs (six runs total) and in the game winning run. him to 3-0 on the season. He had four seven innings that he pitched. They will be hosting a four-game
seven hits during his five innings on The fourth game of the series strikeouts and allowed three runs (one CSM will return to the field on Fri- series over the weekend.

CSM Men’s Playoff Hopes

Fall With Season-Ending Loss
CSM Women Reign
By Mike Stone Mines made All-RMAC teams. Senior
in Season Finale
Staff Writer guard Franklin Ryk was on the Honor- style have turned the program around.
able Mention All-East Division Team With a record of 4-23 the year before
The Colorado School of Mines while Senior Forward Ian Elseth and Krueger arrived, she quickly took
Men’s Basketball Team finished Sophomore guard Kyle Pape made charge bringing the team to a record
up their season two weekends ago the All-RMAC East Division Second of 12-16 her first season and appearing
with a record of 14-13. A part of the Team. These players were essential in playoffs the next three years.
Rocky Mountain Athletic Confer- to Mines’ success this year as they In the 2004/05 season, the Oredig-
ence (RMAC) East Conference, the showed leadership on the court with gers had their best performance in
team has had a long and productive statistics and character. Every one program history with a 19-9 record
year, but couldn’t make it to the of the graduating seniors will be and 13-6 in the RMAC. That year, they
RMAC Shootout. missed. lost to Fort Hays State in the quarter-
Over the year, CSM Basketball Another honor received by the finals 81-53. Last year, the team made
had some strong showings and a team was having players on the All- it all the way to the finals, facing off
few upsets. In December, Mines Academic Teams. Seniors Ian Elseth against CSU-Pueblo. With the score
beat Texas A&M Commerce 84-80, and Davey Iverson made the Men’s 34-33 at half, Mines pulled ahead and
and, just a month later, squeezed out Second Team, while Junior Ben was up 50-47 with 8 minutes to go.
a win over Chadron State 59-58. Mohr, Sophomore Casey O’Hayre After holding on, the Orediggers made
Their greatest spread of the season and Sophomore Grant Gunhus were a few key mistakes and lost 65-54.
was against Western N.M., winning named to the Honor Roll. This year, two members of the
by 29 points, 79-50. Mines even Last season, the Orediggers had squad made All-RMAC teams. Senior
beat Regis 81-55 in February, and a record of 15-14 and made it to the center Angela Pearson received an
Regis went on to win the division semi-finals of the RMAC Shootout Honorable Mention All-East Division
last weekend. Tournament. Their quarter-finals win Team spot, while Senior guard Iva To-
Mines’ hope for playoffs faded against Fort Lewis was their first mova made the First All-East Division
in the last weekend of the season RMAC Shootout victory since 1996 Team. Pearson led the team with 6.1
when the Orediggers lost to Colora- and showed the RMAC that Mines Courtesy CSM Athletics rebounds per game and managed two
do Christian 66-53 and first-ranked was a team to be feared. Mines will Senior Iva Tomova helped CSM reach a 15-13 season double-doubles in the season. Tomova
Metro, 81-71. This became a slow loose 5 graduating Seniors this year led the team in assists, steals, and
end to a successful year for Mines including Ryk and Elseth. Next year an average of 16.7 points per game.
but they still ended up finishing with is sure to be tough, but well worth the By Mike Stone though always trailing, kept making This is her second appearance on an
a winning season. surprises to come from a predomi- comebacks to Metro’s power style All-RMAC team.
Staff Writer
This year was head coach Pryor nantly Junior-based team. and getting within 4 points several As for the All-Academic teams,
Orser’s 6th season as the Head A few noteworthy statistics from times and within 2 points at 9:17 in the Junior Emily Przekwas, Junior Liz
The CSM Women’s Basketball
Coach of Mines. With a record this season include a record of 11-1 game. At the foul line, the Orediggers Jeffries, and Sophomore Julie Mar-
Team finished their season this year by
of 75-88, Orser has made drastic when scoring 70 points or more. couldn’t take advantage of opportu- shall received the Honor Roll Team
making an appearance in the quarter-
changes to Mines basketball after Mines is also the top team in the con- nities. Metro state got 21 points on positions.
finals of the Rocky Mountain Athletic
a first season record of 5-20. Indi- ference in scoring defense (64.2 ppg) fouls and Mines only 2. Metro went Mines will loose 3 graduating
Conference (RMAC) Shootout last
vidual players as well as team talent and blocked shots (3.4 bpg). When on to the Finals, but lost to Regis on Seniors this year. Hopefully, next
Wednesday. Sixth-seeded Orediggers
have improved greatly. There has three players scored at least ten points March 4th. year Mines can pull off a RMAC title,
lost a frustrating game to third-seeded
been no word of Orser ever leaving, in a game, the Orediggers wer 13-2. The Head Coach for the Women’s given that 3 starters this year were
Metro State, 69-56. The team finished
he is deeply committed to the team Finally, Mines was 11-4 at home this Team is Paula Krueger. She is in her freshmen and with another year of
with an overall record of 15-13.
and the sport of basketball. year and 42-10 over the last couple fourth year of coaching Mines basket- experience comes a lot of talent and
Mine’s loss against Metro was
This year, three players from of years. ball. Her talents and unique coaching team blending.
a “nailbiter,” as the Orediggers,
March 7, 2007 Page 15

U of Michigan
announces plans
to buy the “M”
Adam Freeland
NCFE Executive Investigator

A series of events set in motion by Zion “M.”

the recent storms has put the Colorado This did not come as a surprise to
School of Mines into severe debt. The many readers of Higher Education
storm itself delayed construction of and Out-Of-State Expansion Weekly
the new Recreation Center both at magazine. The University of Michi-
the construction site and in the supply gan has been, for the past 4 years,
chain. At last month’s National Col- buying large scale “M” paraphernalia.
legiate Financial Executives (NCFE) The policy started when a graduate of
Chase Hoffman/Oredigger
convention, this dire financial situa- Montrose High School, Jason Hall, at-
The Prestige of the ‘M’ could bear new meaning to alumni away from home
tion became evident. It was during tended the University of Michigan and
this discussion that the University of then went on to become the Student apolis Community College “M.” of the University of Michigan when department graduations at Michigan.
Michigan made its move. In what Body President. Jason persuaded the Webb has assured the Mines climbing to the “M”. Perhaps the This may never happen, though, as
Dillon Webb, the Michigan NCFE board of directors of the school to community that the proposed offer most drastic changes would not be Howard K. Stern has claimed to be
representative, called an “offer for purchase the Montrose High School would only slightly alter the current seen until the traditional countdown the biological father of our “M” and
the future,” “M.” The policy has continued as the tradition of the school. Incoming to commencements on the mountain. is suing for custody.
Webb announced the intention of University purchased the Miami Tech freshmen would be required to wear This tradition’s timing would be
his university to purchase the Mount “M” and, most recently, the Minne- hard hats that bear the official seal altered to coincide with the various

Ritter, Global
Warming Scientists Confirm Link between
Mike Stone
Senior Hotness Expert
Fighting and St. Patrick’s Day
Governor Bill Ritter announced Mike Stone
Sunday that he is “Pro-Global Warm- Chief Correspondent
ing.” This came as a shock to political on Beeranomics
analysts across the state, noting it was
political suicide. There are several Scientists at Guinness Laborato- proponents of St. Patrick’s Day are Scientist McFlanigan commented beer, the men started fighting over the
“hot topic” issues in the upcoming ries have discovered a shocking truth Boston, New York and Chicago, where on the discovery process, noting the woman while the control room played
elections. They include the Iraqi behind St. Patrick’s Day and drinking businesses are closed, parades occur, trial involved a control room with 4 Scrabble.
War, illegal immigration, Star Wars alcoholic beverages. According to lead and rivers are dyed green. These three men and 1 woman with water. The Ivan and Connor McMannis from
Episode 7, global warming, etc., but Scientist Patrick Shamus Nickerson cities along with Dublin are where 2.7 experiment room involved 4 men Boon Dock Saints offered no com-
no one foresaw the support of global McFlanigan, 97.5% of all fights on St. of the 3.3 billion fights occur. There and 1 woman in a room with 5 kegs. ment on the correlation of beer and
warming by Ritter. Patrick’s Day are related to alcohol. has been no public outcry to stop Sure enough, after several pitchers of fighting.
Bill Ritter grew up on a farm Overall, fights rise from an average of the drinking and
East of Aurora and was the 6th of 12 2,000 per day internationally to nearly fighting, but po-
children. It is believed that he first 3.3 billion on March 17th. McFlanigan lice are cracking
became interested in the atmosphere says the jump is due to celebratory down.
and aerosol sprays in the fields. His drinking on St. Patrick’s Day all over Boston Po-
hair was perfect as a child. “I became the world. lice Chief Brian
Governor to make a difference. With St. Patrick’s Day is a day of re- Roberts claimed,
Colorado’s help we can speed up membrance for missionaries all over “This yeah, the
Global Warming,” stated Ritter. He the world. It is celebrated on what is Boston police
went on to note that Colorado is the believed to be the day St. Patrick died. depahtment will
worst state in the country for produc- He was known to drive the snakes out arrest anyone
ing salt-water fish. His plan is to of Ireland on a single day by drinking seen drinking in
increase this number by making the a keg by himself, chasing them naked Hahvahd Yahd,
ocean come to Colorado. through the streets and jumping in the driving their cah,
“Imagine it- Surf sunny Colorado freezing Dublin River. or naked in the
by day and ski its mountains at night. Guinness Laboratories’ announce- pahrade.” This
Colorado’s economy will skyrocket!” ment has sent shock waves through comes at the out-
claimed the Governor. When asked the entire Irish community. The Irish rage of AA re-
about all the states and countries at People’s Free Libertarian Youth (I.P. jects and drink-
lower elevations, he offered solace in Freely) spokesman Thomas O’Shea ers everywhere.
Colorado for all seeking great hotels responded sternly saying, “St. Patrick’s Kerry Marie of
and fabulous tourist attractions. Day is a day of remembrance and not a Boston shouted,
The announcement came after a day of drinking. Very few Irish people “There’s no rules
second month of snow storms around have drinks on March 17th.” on St. Patty’s,”
Colorado causing snow plow logisti- The Irish people are known for in- and: “Every-
cal nightmares. Ritter finished the venting beer and in the process, doom one’s Irish on
press conference saying; “I’ve been civilization. St. Patrick’s.”
so cold lately, I just want it to be warm Mike Stone/Oredigger
In the United States, the biggest Onsite investigation showing the natural pugnacity associated with alcohol.
again and summer is too far away.”
Page 16 March 7, 2007

Potent Quota-babb
Number Theory
“I don’t kno
w whether
we’ll find hi
m. I don’t
know that i
1423 important,
t’s all that

Days since the declaration of “mis-

sion accomplished”

-Army chief of staff Gen. Peter Schoomaker on the impor-

tance of capturing or killing Osama bin Laden

$775,773 per “ I wa
s g o i ng to
o m m
few c
student ha v e
o t h er D e m o crat-
on th i a l c a
p r e s ident r d s , but
The endowment per student at
ic Edw a
Princeton University 4
J o h n have
date s out y o u
it t u r n
a b i f you
g o i n to reh g got,”
to “ f a
t h e w ord im-
use o f a n
87.7% so I — s o
a n’t r e a l l y talk
pas s e , a r d s.”2
Ed w
The percentage of post-docs
awarded in the engineering field
to men as of 1996 4
- The always vocal conservative pundit Ann Coulter, talking
about the candidates on the Democratic side at the recent
annual CPAC

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