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I like monkeys. The pet store was selling them for five cents a piece.

I thought
that odd since they were normally a couple thousand. I decided not
to look a gift horse in the mouth. I bought 200. I like monkeys.
I took my 200 monkeys home. I have a big car. I let one drive. His name
was Sigmund. He was retarded. In fact, none of them were really bright.
They kept punching themselves in their genitals. I laughed. Then they
punched my genitals. I stopped laughing.
I herded them into my room. They didn't adapt very well to their new
environment. They would screech, hurl themselves off of the couch at high
speeds and slam into the wall. Although humorous at first, the spectacle
lost its novelty halfway into its third hour.
Two hours later I found out why all the monkeys were so inexpensive: they
all died. No apparent reason. They all just sorta' dropped dead. Kinda'
like when you buy a goldfish and it dies five hours later. Damn cheap
monkeys.
I didn't know what to do. There were 200 dead monkeys lying all over my
room, on the bed, in the dresser, hanging from my bookcase. It looked like
I had 200 throw rugs.
I tried to flush one down the toilet. It didn't work. It got stuck. Then I
had one dead, wet monkey and 199 dead, dry monkeys.
I tried pretending that they were just stuffed animals. That worked for a
while, that is until they began to decompose. It started to smell real
bad.
I had to pee but there was a dead monkey in the toilet and I didn't want
to call the plumber. I was embarrassed.
I tried to slow down the decomposition by freezing them. Unfortunately,
there was only enough room for two monkeys at a time so I had to change
them every 30 seconds. I also had to eat all the food in the freezer so it
didn't all go bad.
I tried burning them. Little did I know my bed was flammable. I had to
extinguish the fire.
Then I had one dead, wet monkey in my toilet, two dead, frozen monkeys in
my freezer, and 197 dead, charred monkeys in a pile on my bed. The odor
wasn't improving.
I became agitated at my inability to dispose of my monkeys and to use the
bathroom. I severely beat one of my monkeys. I felt better.
I tried throwing them away but the garbage man said that the city was not
allowed to dispose of charred primates. I told him that I had a wet one.
He couldn't take that one either. I didn't bother asking about the frozen
ones.
I finally arrived at a solution. I gave them out as Christmas gifts. My
friends didn't know quite what to say. They pretended that they like them,
but I could tell they were lying. Ingrates. So I punched them in the
genitals.
I like monkeys.

The Word of Wrath


Artist - Sunstorm Interactive
Here it is translated from Wrath's french, back to English, to German and
once again back to English. (I am really bored today):)
love I drop hammer. The memory of the domestic animal sold it for five
hundred per piece. I thought that connects odd, since they normally were
thousands. I decided not to regard me a horse of the gift in the opening.
I bought 200. I love drop hammer.
I took along my 200 drop hammers to the house. I have a large auto. I left
a reader. Its name was Sigmund. It was delayed. None was real actually it
lighting up. It maintained in their Genitals to be punched. I laughed.
Then they punched my Genitals. I heard to laugh on.
I lived it in the troop in my space. They did not adapt very well to their
new climate. They screech to discharge excluded function of the couch with
the rates and striking out raised into the wall. Although fully with
tendency at the start, which destroyed play its innovation in the center
in its third hour.
Two hours later I discovered, why all drop hammer were, if not very much.
No obvious reason. It that whole sorta even ' completely diminished. Kinda
' as, if you buy goldfish and cubes to him newer five hours. Faults
inexpensive drop hammer.
I did not know which to form. There was 200 dead drop hammer, those
everywhere my section, on the bed, in the planner, while my library are.
It resembled me had 200 covers jet.
I tried to empty to the lower surface the toilet. That did not operate. It
was squeezed. Then I had a dead and wet drop hammer and 199 dead, dry drop
hammer.
I tried to pretend this which was them right the filled animals. That
operated during one moment, which is, until they began to break above. It
began to believe false truth.
I had to form small piece, but there was a drop hammer, which was died in
the toilet and I did not want to call the plumber. I was brought in
embarrassment.
I tried to slow down the fragmentation down by freezing it. Unfortunately
there was only sufficient section for two drop hammer, at the same time
therefore, which I had to modify her every 30 seconds. I had to eat it
from all food in the freezing machine therefore also, which all did not go
the false.
I tried to burn it. Little, which I knew that my bed were flammable. I had
to extinguish myself fires.
Then I had a dead and wet drop hammer in my toilet, two died, the drop
hammer, in my freezing machine frozen those, and 197 died, the drop
hammer, which carbonized in a batch on my bed. The smell did not improve.
I became excited with my inability, in order to reject my drop hammer and
use the bathroom. I struck severly one my drop hammer. I smelled better.
I tried to throw it but the man of the waste said that one the city of the
rejection the carbonized primacies not permitted. I said to him that I had
wet. It could not not take this also. I took the trouble not to question
even from the locally determined.
I came finally to a solution. I gave it outside like Christmas gift. My
friends knew not completely which to say. They have pretend that they like
them, but I could say that they found me. Ungrateful. Thus I punched it in
the Genitals.
I love drop hammer.
Anyone want to try portugese?
english-french-english-german-english-portugese-english version:
hammer unit of the drop of love I. the memory of the domestic animal sold
it for five one hundred for the part. I thought that he connects odd,
since that I was normally thousand. I decided me not to consider me a
horse of the gift in the aperture. I bought 200. I love I hammer of the
drop.
I made examination throughout mine 200 hammer units of the drop to the
house. I have a great automobile. I left a reader. Its name was Sigmund.
It was been slow. No real age really it lighting above. It kept in its
genitals to be punched. I laugh. Then they had punched mine genitals. I
heard me to laugh on.
I lived it in the troop in my space. They did not adaptaram well its new
climate very. Screech to unload itself had excluded the function of couch
with the taxes and to hit for it are raised in the wall. Although entirely
with trend in the start, that destroyed the game its innovation in the
center in its third hour.
Two hours later I discovered, because all the hammer unit of the drop was,
if not very very. No obvious ratio. It who sorta entire exactly '
diminished full. Kinda ' as, if you to buy it goldfish and the cubes one
five new hours. It criticizes the cheap hammer unit of the drop.
I did not know which to the form. He had inoperative hammer unit of drop
200, those in all part my section, the bed, in planner, when my library
will be. He resembled himself had me the spurt of 200 covers.
I tried to empty to the surface lowest the toilet. This was not operated.
It was

espremido.

Then I had I hammer inoperative and wet of the drop and


199 inoperative, dry hammer unit of the drop.
I tried to dissimulate this that was they right the fulled animals. This
was operated during a moment, that is, until them started to break above.
It started to believe the false truth.
I had that to give form to the small part, but he had a hammer unit of the
drop, that was died in the toilet and I did not want to call plumber. I
was brought in embarrassment.
I tried to delay for below the spalling congealing Infelizmente low I only
had a enough section for the hammer unit of two drops, at the same time
consequently, that I had that to modify each 30 seconds. I had that to all
eat it of the food in the machine congealing itself consequently also, the
one that all had not been the false one.
I tried to burn it. Little, that I knew that my bed was inflammable. I had
that to extinguish itself fires.
Then I had I hammer inoperative and wet in my toilet, two of the drop I
died, the hammer unit of the drop, in my machine congealing myself
congealed those, and 197 died, the hammer unit of the drop, that
carbonized in a group in my bed. I smell it did not improve.
I became excited with my inability, the end to reject my hammer unit of
the drop and to use the bathroom. I hit severly one my hammer unit of the
drop. I smelled more better.
I tried to play it but the man of wastefulness said that one the city of
the rejection primacies carbonized not allowed. I said to it that I had
wet. He could not also make examination of this. I made examination of the
problem not to question exactly of the definitive one local.
I came finally to a solution. I gave it outside as the gift of christmas.
My friends had known not full that to say. They have to dissimulate that
they like d, but I could say that they had found me. Ungrateful. Thus I
punched it in genitals.
I love I hammer of the drop.

[Edited by starfall (04-28-00)]

� Madrona Park, Inc., 1998.

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