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What's life in a cult

Former member Sabrina tells 38 reasons why she will never join Scientology again.

1. Not allowed to see my mom but once a day when I 15. After Scientology events we were all assigned a
was six. Was only permitted to see her at dinner for number of books or tapes we were suppose to sell
one hour. to the public. We had to make our quotas before we
were allowed to go home. I started selling books
2. My mom was made to work 12 hour days and was
when I was 15. Sometimes we had to call from lists
only paid $50.00 a week and given room and board.
we were given to make our quotas. Most of these
3. I was made to live in a dorm at the age of six, lists were to Scientologist who were out of the state
separate from my mom or dad, with three other or out of the country.
girls my age.
16. The staff was not allowed to eat the nice food put
4. I was made to believe from a very early age that out for public after events. It was only for the
Scientologist were the better than other people, and public, we would get in trouble if we were caught
if you were not in it, you were not good enough. eating it.
5. I was told to only tell my grandparents good things 17. The staff was not allowed to socialize with the public
about myself when I visited, to not let on if I was after events, only to sell books, we could not join
behind in school, but just make them think I am a them on the dance floor, or in the auditorium.
great student.
18. The Hacienda (apartment complex where the staff
6. Scientologists constantly refers to people outside of live) is set up so that staff can not just get up and
their "religion" as "Wogs". A derogatory term used leave when they want to. The Premises is
commonly by members in it. surrounded by a large gate and bushes so that
people cannot see in easily. There are several
7. I was made to join staff when I was 14. I had to
cameras around the complex to keep an eye on the
sign a billion year contract because of their beliefs in
staff. There is a security guard at the front gate at
all times to let people in and out. Staff may not
8. I had to stop attending school when I was 14, to leave without first explaining where they are going
join staff. I could only attend school one day a week and what they are doing to the security guard.
on Sunday for about 10 hours.
19. Sea Org staff are not allowed to own televisions,
9. I was made to live in a two-room apartment with mine was confiscated when I was 14 or 15. Staff are
seven other women when I was 14. Overcrowding is not allowed to watch TV ever. Movies are only
commonplace. I live like that for most of my seven allowed on the weekend if you get approval to have
years on staff. time off. Movies are not allowed on weekdays.
10. I had 30 minute lunches, breakfasts and dinners. If 20. Most staff do not have cars or cell phones because it
I was late back to work I would get in trouble. costs to much money to own them. If you have a
car, you have to check with the security guard if you
11. I was working 10 hour days, six days a week, from
want to leave, if he is suspicious he will not let you
the age of 16. I was not getting paid overtime. I
was only making $50.00 a week.
21. The only days staff are allowed to celebrate and
12. The only time I would have off, was every other
dance together is the Christmas party and Beer and
week, if my production was good enough.
Cheese party. Twice a year. Don't ask, neither of
Sometimes I would go a month without even one
these celebrations make much sense.
day off.
22. I was forced to cut all ties with my dad when I was
13. When I joined, I would not see my mom for days at
15. He was declared a Suppressive Person by
a time. She lived in a different dorm than I did, and
Scientology, and that meant I could no longer talk
had a different eating schedule than me.
or associate myself with him at all.
14. At the age of 15 I was made to stay up until 12 pm
23. My mom died of cancer when I was 16. She was still
every Thursday and Friday to attend Scientology
on staff at the time, and she wrote in her will she
meetings and clean their facilities with all the other
wanted my brother and I assigned the guardians of 30. They made me sign a 10,000.00 waiver, promising
Rusty and Linda Hilton, both on staff at Flag. that I would never talk out about my experiences
with Scientology. I had to sign it before they would
24. Once I joined staff I could no longer visit my
let me leave.
relatives or grandparents for even a weekend
without prior approval. At times my once a year 31. I was assigned handlers when I wanted to leave. I
request was denied for whatever reason, or no one could not leave any of the buildings or walk outside
had the time to look at it. without one of them. There are security guards
assigned to each building, video cameras at each
25. I was not allowed to socialize with anyone outside of
building entrance and exit, so if I wanted to leave
the staff. If I did I was reported on and pulled in for
without my handler, they would know.
32. I returned to Clearwater about a year after they
26. I was put on the e-meter once a week, along with
sent me away. I was approached by one of their
all the other staff, to see if I had a clean or dirty
security guards and asked what I was doing here. I
needle. Clean meant I was OK, dirty meant I was
was on a public street on my lunch break. I just
hiding something. If it was dirty I was pulled in for
ignored him and walked away. They still thought
questioning, and made to write up stuff I thought I
they could control me, even though I was no longer
was hiding
on staff.
27. After each live success story we were suppose to
33. When my brother found out I was talking to my dad
stand up, clap, and say hip hip hooray three times
again, he refused to talk to me anymore. Now that I
to LRHs picture. This was daily. After each course
have associate myself with my dad, I am also
completion in Scientology we had to tell everyone in
declared, which means my brother can't talk to me.
our class our successes, once we were done we had
to clap and say hip hooray to LRHs picture. His 34. Once I left, my "legal guardians' have never
pictures are everywhere in their buildings. It was contacted me or spoke to me, even before I was
not optional you had to do it. declared.
28. I had to get a divorce while I was in Scientology 35. I do not have one single friend I knew before I left
because my husband wanted out, and I did not. I Scientology (2002). They have all chosen to write
was actually not told he was leaving until the day he me off because I no longer am a Scientologist. Once
left. He didn't even tell me, I was told by someone I was declared, I was deleted from about 15 peoples
who knew him. It is against their rules to speak or myspace page. I did not delete them, they deleted
mention to anyone in Scientology you are leaving me.
staff. If you do, you can get kicked out and never be
36. I am not allowed to talk to my Scientology school or
able to talk to your friends in it again.
teachers. They will also no longer talk to me. Once I
29. When I finally decided I wanted to leave because I left staff, they no longer thought it necessary to
missed my ex husband too much, I was not allowed associate themselves with me.
to just go. They made me work in the galley
37. I did not have a High School diploma when I left in
scrubbing pots and pans. They said I could not
2002. I was 20 years old. Once I was married, they
mention to anyone I wanted to leave, but everyone
said I was now considered an adult and I no longer
pretty much knew what I was doing. It took me
needed to attend school. I was only 17 when I
three months of being separated from the group, all
my friends, being put on the e-meter (lie detector)
for two weeks straight and asked if I intend to 38. I never learned to drive, I now have a car, but
contact my dad when I leave. I finally was allowed driving was something they did not think was
to leave, but was told I was moving to New Mexico necessary.
to work for a Scientology school. I was told I could
not return to Clearwater at all.

Sabrina grew up in Scientology from the age of six and left at the age of 20 with no
education, no money, no friends. She is still healing from the experience.
She feel is her mission now to educate people on the dark side of this tax-exempt cult.

For additional info on the cult of Scientology visit the ex-scientologist message board: HTTP://

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