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Table of Contents

Chapter 1: Introduction .......................................................................................................... 1 1.1 The Perfect Evening ..................................................................................................... 1 1.2 Book Objectives .............................................................................................................. 1.! Cu"ing #uick$% Is Co""on and Curab$e ..............................................................& 1.' Book Overvie( ..............................................................................................................1) Chapter 2: *echanics ........................................................................................................... 1! 2.1 The +nato"% of Ejacu$ation .................................................................................... 1! 2.2 Causes Of Pre"ature Ejacu$ation ......................................................................... 1 2.! ,o( Can Tantra ,e$p- ..............................................................................................2! 2.' .h% /ot Ejacu$ate- .....................................................................................................20 2. . The 1$ti"ate +pproach .............................................................................................2& Chapter !: 2o$o Prep .............................................................................................................') !.1 Practice 3uide$ines ......................................................................................................') !.2 4esensiti5ing ..................................................................................................................' !.! 6e$a7ing ...........................................................................................................................'8 !.' Opening 2enses ............................................................................................................. 1 !. *easured 2e$f9P$easuring .......................................................................................... : !.0 PC Pu"p ..........................................................................................................................02 Chapter ': 2o$o *aster% ........................................................................................................0: '.1 Peaking.............................................................................................................................0: '.2 Interrupting Ejacu$ation ............................................................................................8! '.! 2e7ua$ Breathing ...........................................................................................................&) '.' P$ateauing ........................................................................................................................&: Chapter : Partner Prep .........................................................................................................:2 .1 ;a$se E7pectations .i$$ <i$$ =ou ...........................................................................:2 .2 Partnering 3uide$ines .................................................................................................:! .! Turning Each Other On ............................................................................................1)) .' Taking Turns................................................................................................................1)8 . 4oing Each Other +t The 2a"e Ti"e .................................................................11! Chapter 0: >ove"aking ...................................................................................................... 11 0.1 Patience? * % ;riend ................................................................................................. 110 0.2 2e7ua$ Positions ....................................................................................................... 11& 0.! +pproaching 2$o($%..................................................................................................12) 0.' *oving E7ercises ...................................................................................................... 12 0. The +rt Of ;ucking...................................................................................................1!) Chapter 8: Tantric *aster% ............................................................................................... 1!: 8.1 The Tantra @ision..................................................................................................... 1!: 8.2 Tantric >ove P$a%..................................................................................................... 1 ! 8.! *oving Energ% ......................................................................................................... 1 8.' E7ercise: Creating The 2pace ;or Tantric >ove P$a% .................................. 1 8 8. E7ercise: 2hangri9>a .............................................................................................. 1 : Chapter &: ;ina$ Thoughts ................................................................................................ 102

&.1 +nother 2tor%.............................................................................................................. 102 &.2 ,ands9On Coaching .................................................................................................. 10' &.! 2"art 2e7 .................................................................................................................... 10 &.' Bib$iograph% ................................................................................................................ 108 &. *usic 6eco""endations ......................................................................................... 181 &.0 3$ossar% Of Ter"s .....................................................................................................18'

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Chapter 1: Introduction
I want to tell you a true story about a typical sexual encounter between me and the sexiest, most passionate woman I've ever met. Of course, passion is only one of the reasons I married Jeffre. I hope reading it turns you on as much as writing it turned me on. If you play with yourself while visualizing this story, I would be honored. We're here to en oy sex, right! I ust want you to remember that, no matter how insecure you are about your ability to master e aculation, this story is about someone who was one of the w or l d ' s c h a m p i o n s a t c u m i n g f a s t , n a m e l y m e . I n e v e r e n t e r e d O l ym p i c f a s t cuming trials "do they still have that event!#, but I bet I could have placed high w ithout even tr ying. $o, I could have won a gold medal while tr ying m y damnedest not to cum. %hat's how I used to be. I'm different now as the following story illustrates. &nd it's not ust with this one wonderful woman.

1.1 The Perfect Evening


. e a $ ( a %s d o o u r b e s t t o " a k e $ o v e i n t h e " o " e n t ? ( i t h n o s t r e s s i n t h e perfect surroundings. That evening (as no e7ception. It (as ear$% enough that (e (erenAt e7hausted fro" the da% and had no ti"e $i"it. .e b at he d e ac h ot he r ca re fu $$ % to ( as h a( a % th e ou ts id e ( o r$ d. . e e nt er ed our private Tantric te "p$e Bour bedroo"C ( hich ( as decorated ( ith hare" fabrics and appointed to heighten our senses. .e $it cand$es? spra%ed perfu"e? and arranged f$o(ers to add a sensuous touch. +s usua$? (e carefu$$% se$ected three of our "os t s ens uous "us ic C4 s to "atch our "ood. .e titi $$at ed a$$ of our senses fro" a distance $ong before our $ove p$a% began. +s (e sat cross9$egged on our big bed? I "arve$ed at ho( desirab$e the g$inting cand$e$ight "ade her ever9%oung9 $ooking bod% appear. D ust then? that fa"i$iar

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t i n g $ e t h a t p r e s a g e s a n e r e c t i o n b e g a n . I n " % ) s ? I d o nA t s p r i n g t o a t t e n t i o n as eas i$ % as I did in "% ear$ier %ea rs . But aging has done $itt$ e to Eue$$ the i n t e n s e s e n s i t i v i t % t h a t A s a $ ( a %s " a d e " e c u " i n a n e %e b $ i n k . T o n i g h t ? I $ooked for(ard to continuing as $ong as (e both (anted. .e bo(ed fro" the (aist (ith hands in pra%er over our hearts? touched foreheads? and took a deep breath together. The appreciation and $ove just t u " b $ e d o u t o f e a c h o f u s ? " a k i n g u s s h a r e s ( e e t e v e r %t h i n g s i n h u s h e d ? reverent tones. The (ar"th that spread fro" "% heart to "% $oins suggested that pass ion ( ou$d soon gus h forth. 2 o "uch s e7ua$ energ % ( as f$o( ing and (eAd hard$% touched each other %et. Sensuous Massage * % be$oved as ked for s ens uous "as s age? firs t ( ith rabbit fur and then ( ith scented oi$. .e had no agenda and no ti"e fra"e so I touched her ever so soft$% and s$o($%. ,er "oans confir"ed ho( she enjo%ed "% attentions. 2he ( r i t h e d a n d v i b r a t e d ( i t h p a s s i o n ? s t r e a "i n g o r g a s "i c e n e r g % a $ $ o v e r h e r bod%. I tuned into her energ%? opening "% channe$s? and savored her s(eet s e n s a t i o n s c o u r s i n g t h r o u g h " % b o d %. T h e o $ d " e c o u $ d h a v e c u " s o " a n % ti"es a$read %. +nd so far IAd just brus hed her %oni $ight$% once or t( ice ( ith "% fingertips BF%oniF is Tan tric for vaginaC. The "us ic added to our s e$f9induced trance. I kept up the s ens uous cares s es $ong after s heA d s topped as king for "ore. .hen she begged to touch "e? ho( cou$d I refuse- 2he scratched? tick$ed? and "assaged "e s$o($% a$$ over unti$ I ( a s ( r i t h i n g a n d s c r e a "i n g ( i t h d e $ i g h t " %s e $ f . C a n %o u t e $ $ t h a t n e i t h e r o f us is Euiet? inhibited? or restrained (hen it co"es to sacred se7ua$ p$a%.hen she put her "outh on vajra BTantric for penisC? I thought I (ou$d co"e (ith the first subt$e $ick. But she is a Tantric $over (ho goes s$o($% to thorough$% de$ight in each "o"ent. .e (ere both fee$ing ever%thing so deep$% (ith a$$ our senses open? not rushing head$ong to(ards so"e envisioned future orgas".

Cuming All Over I b r e a t h e d ? r e $ a 7 e d ? a n d c i r c u $ a t e d t h o s e d e $ i c i o u s s e ns a t i o n s u p a n d a ( a % fro" "% genita$s. I kne( those other parts of "% bod% Bfeet? nipp$es? headC cou$dnAt ejacu$ate? but it sure fe$t $ike I (as cu"ing a$$ over. Instead? the in te ns e ur ge t o r e$ ea s e c a$ "e d a nd I c ou $d re $a 7 in to "o r e i nt en s e s t i "u $ at i on of vaj ra. Odd$ %? the s $o( er s he ( ent? the s tronger the s ens ations ( ere. + nd I $oved the"G 2o "uch p$easure fro" severa$ inches of hard throbbing f$esh. .ho ( ou$d ( ant this to end Euick$ % in a fe( seconds of e7p$os ion- /ot "e? I (as $ooking for(ard to hours of (orship. +fter (ho kno(s ho( $ong? I turned over? touched? kissed? and then $icked her no( ( et %oni de$icate$ %. 2he had "u$tip$e orgas "s ( ith "% fingers and then ( ith "% tongue? each one rocking "e to "% core. , er energ % pu$s es "ade "e ( a n t t o c u " ( i t h h e r . @ a j r a h i d i n g b e t ( e e n " % $ e g s s t a %e d h a r d a s s h e c o n t i n u e d t o s t r e a " e c s t a s % i n t o " % b o d %. 2 t r e t c h e d o u t ( i t h " % " o u t h bet( een her $egs ? it ( as as if s he ( as pu"ping p$eas ure right do( n into "% bod% H "aking "e ju"p ( ith e$ectricit%. .e (ere both rocking and "oaning ( ith s o "uch p$eas ure that ( e cou$d have continued forep$a % $ike this a$$ evening (ith soft? subt$e? s$o( touching. /o hard hitting here $ike in +"erican footba$$. +gain? ho( cou$d I resist (hen "% juic% dar$ing sa%s FIAve got to have %our big hard cock inside "e no(GF Instead of ju"ping her forcefu$$% $ike "% hor"ones de"anded? vajra entered her engorged %oni ever so reverent$%. 2$o($%? s$o($% I "oved? not so "uch to tease? but to appreciate ever% "i$$i"eter intense (ith p $ e a s u r e . I j u s t ( a n t e d t o s a v o r e a c h s e n s a t i o n f u $ $ %. . i t h e v e r % s u b t $ e "ove"ent? (e cou$d fee$ each otherAs $itt$e orgas"ic e7p$osions. .e ca$$ the" i"p$osive energ% orgas"s? the po(erfu$ spas"s of cu"ing (ithout the sEuirting. +nd $ike (e$$ trained Tantrikas? (e both be$$o(ed (ith ecstas%. Engulfed By Vibrations It s ee"ed a $itt$ e $ifeti "e pas s ed unti$ vaj raAs s $o( s ha$$o( 9at9 firs t thrus ts reached inside her fu$$%. .e both tried to be sti$$? but the interna$ vibrations si"p$% engu$fed both of us together. These spas"s that spread a$$ over (ere so de$ightfu$ that (e just $et the" run their course. + coup$e of ti"es (e cou$dnAt

h e $ p f r o " $ a u g h i n g h %s t e r i c a $ $ % t o g e t h e r . , o ( c a n s o " e o n e f e e $ s o " u c h p$easure a$$ over fro" such a s"a$$ part of the bod%+ s the energ % s pread a( a% fro" "% throbbing vaj ra and the po( erfu$ urge to cu" subsided again? I began to thrust in and out s$o($% and gent$%. Each $itt$e stroke (as ecstatic a$$ b% itse$f? creating intense fee$ings of p$easure. It see"ed that the p$easure fro" each "ove"ent (as so intense that I cou$d have stopped after an% one of the" and fe$t se7ua$$% co"p$ete. 2o"eti"es (e "oved i nt o e ac h ot he r d ee p$ %. 2 o "e t i "e s ( e a$ te rn a te d $ %i n g s t i$ $ ( a it in g fo r th e otherA s pre9orgas "ic breaths ? "oans ? and g%ra tions to subs ide. .e varied the thrus ts fas ter then s $o( er? then Euick s ha$$o( burs ts of "o tion? then deep sensuous grinding unti$ (e (ou$d both shake (ith ecstas%. .e (ere so in tune p$a%ing each otherAs instru"ents $ike virtuosos in a trance% 5one. Over and over (e rose to just before the point of no return. .hen one of us s topped? (e vibrated ( ith orgas "ic ( aves riding the s urges of ecs tas % jus t before that (onderfu$ precipice. Our $ove "aking ( as $ike s top9ti "e "us ic? a f e ( c h o r d s a n d t h e n s i $ e n c e ( h e r e ( e r e $ a 7 e d i n t o t h e e n e r g % s t r e a "i n g i n ? out? and bet(een our (ho$e bodies. Oh Those Glorious Contractions 2o often I fe$t such po(erfu$ surges of p$easure that "ade "e "oan and screa" $ike an ani"a$. Dust $ike she (as doing. +t ever% peak I (as just the s $ightes t s $ip a( a % fro" cu"ing? and ( ou$d have if this s tor % began before I $ e a r n e d ( h a t A s i n t h i s b o o k . I ns t e a d ? I p a c e d " %s e $ f t o r e a c h a n d r e $ a 7 i n t o each ne( p$ateau. O h? thos e g$orious contractions in "% genita$s each ti"e I re$a7ed and sucked the energ% up a(a% fro" "% dancing vajraG +nd? (hat a gift? after each ascent to a high peak? "% e7cite"ent dropped sudden$%. +fter a "o"entAs rest? I cou$d begin pu"ping again (ithout e7p$oding. I (as supre"e$% "otivated to keep the p$easure going on and on. ,o( "an% ti"es- 1)- 2)- .ho kno(s? (e (erenAt counting. .e (ere too bus % enj o %i ng ours e$ves to think about an%th ing e$s e. , o( $ong did ( e reach peak after peak? f$oating in the ti"e$ess void of ecstas%? and then s$o($% "oving

to another higher high- I rea$$% cou$dnA t s a%? but I do re"e"ber that three C4s in our p$a%er started over. 4 id ( e have a "ind9 bogg$ing? record9 s etting? earth9 shattering "utua$ eruption of orgas "s at the end- 2 o"et i"es ( e do? s o"eti "e s ( e donA t But? hones t$ %? I c a n A t r e " e " b e r i f ( e d i d t h i s t i " e . 4 o %o u b e $ i e v e i t ( h e n I s a % i t d o e s n A t " a t t e r t o " e a n %" o r e - . h e n %o u e 7 p e r i e n c e e n d $ e s s s $ o ( s e n s u o u s p $ a % b e i n g f a r a n d a ( a % " o r e e c s t a t i c t h a n r e a c h i n g a n % o r g a s " i c g o a $ ? %o u A $ $ probab$% fee$ the sa"e (a%.

1.2 Book Ob ectives


/o( that (eAre both rea$$% turned on b% the prospect of the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution? (e can get started. To begin (ith? thanks for bu%ing this book. *ore than an%th ing e$s e this is "% pers ona$ s tor % that I ( ant to s hare ( ith %ou . If %ouA r e interes ted enough to read this book and change %ou r $ove $ife b% practicing? then (eAre not so different? %ou and "e. Practicing (hat IA" going to suggest (i$$ be (e$$ (orth %our (hi$e $ike it (as for "e. Before $earning (hatAs in this $itt$e vo$u"e? I canAt te$$ %ou ho( often I fe$t hope$es s about cu"ing too Euick$ %. .hat IA " going to s hare ( ith %o u has changed "% $ove"aking dra"atica$$% and forever. +nd I kno( itAs not a f$uke because I have "u$tip$e $overs (ho derive incredib$e p$easure b% "aking $ove (ith "e. It can do the sa"e for %ou (ith dedication? ti"e? and regu$ar practice. I m O! And "ou re O! The firs t thing %o u need to be$ieve is that thereA s nothing (rong ( ith %o u. C u " i n g i s a g o o d t h i n g . O < ? i t d o e s n A t a $ ( a %s h a p p e n ( h e n %o u ( a n t i t t o . Dust cons ider it a ti"ing prob$e" (hich in the over(he$"ing "aj orit % of cases is easi$% corrected (ith training. I kno( because I did. BB% the (a%? there is a v e r % s "a $ $ c h a n c e t h a t %o u h a v e a "e d i c a $ c o n d i t i o n c a u s i n g %o u r t i "i n g prob$e". ItAs not a bad idea to have a doctor check out %our eEuip"ent if %ou suspect an%thing $ess than robust hea$th.C

I A " n o t a s e 7 u a $ a t h $ e t e o r r e c o r d s e t t e r . > i k e " o s t g u %s ? I h a v e a h i d d e n fantas % of being the ( or$dA s greates t cocks "an. .hen I $ook deep ins ide? I rea$i5e that j us t is nA t "e. Even ( ith a$$ IA ve $earned? IA " s ti$$ $earning. To be s ur e? IA " a "u ch b et te r O r ga s " * as t er ? "% t er " f or s o"eo n e ( ho ca n ch oo s e the t%pe? ti"ing? and nu"ber of orgas"s the% have. But I sti$$ cu" so"eti"es (hen IAd rather not. 2o IAve $earned to face "%se$f and $ike (ho I see? kno(ing IA" just a sensitive gu% (ith a sensitive dick. .hich b% the (a%? I $ove. P $ e a s e b e $ i e v e "e t h a t b e i n g s e ns i t i v e i s a g o o d t h i n g . . o u $ d %o u r a t h e r b e n u " b a n d n o t f e e $ t h o s e d e $ i c i o u s s e n s a t i o n s - / o ? o f c o u r s e n o t ? %o u d o n A t (ant fee$ $ess and thus b$ock %our potentia$ for ecstas%. The 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2 o$ution is nA t about fee$ing $es s ? itA s about fee$ing "ore. ItA s about creating "ore p$easure and "astering its ups and do(ns so %ou can "ake vajra go on forever. This $itt$e book is "ost$% "% stor% about "% $ove re$ationship (ith "% vajra. I h o p e i t ( i $ $ s p r e a d t o %o u r r e $ a t i o n s h i p ( i t h %o u r s . P $ u s I A $ $ t h r o ( i n a $ i t t $ e he$p fro" ta$ented friends and an e7pert here and there so %ouA$$ get the (ho$e stor% fro" ever% ang$e IAve discovered. In fact? hereAs one no( . * % be$oved friend? 2 ha"a? a ( is e and j uic% fe "a$e Ta nt ra c oa ch i n 2 o ut he rn Ca $i fo rn ia ? s a %s F In " % ( o rk ? IA ve f ou nd t ha t "e n ( ho p re "a tu re $ % ej ac u$ at e ar e v er % pa s s i on at e a nd h av e a ( on de rf u$ in te ns it % o f e 7 c i t e "e n t a n d f e e $ i n g . I t A s j u s t t h a t d u e t o t h e i r p r e v i o u s p r o g r a "" i n g ? the%A ve for"ed a habit that $ocks the" out of an% other choices. The%A re taught to eat? e$i"ina te? drive a car and progra" their @ C6. But cra5i$ % enough? so"eho( it has not been oka% in our societ% to teach "en about the po(er and be au t % av ai $a b$ e t o t he " i n th ei r b od ie s a nd s e7 ua $ en er g %. I t ea ch th e " ho( t o b e g i n t o u n d e r s t a n d ? $ i s t e n ? "o n i t o r a n d c o n t r o $ t h a t a $ i v e n e s s ( i t h i n t h e bod% Btheir vehic$esC to "aster the use of it in a$$ circu"stances? inc$uding the se7ua$.F Boo# Ob$ectives ,ereAs a si"p$e c$ear state"ent of (hat this book is about. It presents... I both "odern and ancient proven secrets of pro$onged $ove"aking for "en?

a step b% step approach to beco"ing an Orgas" *aster? ho( to have 2.E.J. BthatAs 2ubt$e Energ% eJchangeC? a s " o r g a s b o r d o f p h %s i c a $ t e c h n i E u e s t h a t c a n s t o p %o u f r o " c u " i n g ( h e n %ou donAt (ant to cu"? practices that can per"an ent$% change %o ur orgas"ic response? and Bof courseC the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution to pre"ature ejacu$ation. T ha t $a s t obj ec ti ve "a % s o un d $i ke a n in f$ at ed gr an di os e p ro "is e? bu t th at A s O < . C ontrar % to ( hat %o u "igh t have heard fro" gu%s (ho te$$ %o u to think a b o u t b a s e b a $ $ o r %o u r g r a n d " o t h e r t o k e e p f r o " s E u i r t i n g ? t h e 1 $ t i " a t e E c s t a t i c 2 o $ u t i o n i s a b o u t * O 6 E e c s t a s %? n o t > E 2 2 s e n s a t i o n . T h a t A s ( h e r e Tantra co"es in? the ancient science and practice of sacred se7ua$it%. T h o u s a n d s o f %e a r s a g o ? o r d i n a r % " e n i n I n d i a ? C h i n a ? a n d T i b e t " a s t e r e d ( h a t %o u A $ $ r e a d h e r e . = o u c a n t o o . = o u A r e p r o b a b $ % h e a $ t h i e r a n d " o r e evo$ved than the"? right- ItA$$ just take a $itt$e fun practice. The e7perts sa% that se7ua$ response has three stages: e7citation? p$ateau? and o r g a s " . O u r a i " h e r e i s s i " p $ % t o $ e n g t h e n t h e p $ a t e a u p h a s e i n d e f i n i t e $ %. T h a t A s ( h % t h i s b o o k i s a b o u t O r g a s " * a s t e r %? n o t a b o u t c o n t r o $ . C o n t r o $ i"p$ies sta%ing under tension? a$(a%s being carefu$? and not trusting %ourse$f t o r e $ a 7 . T h a t A s t h e o p p o s i t e o f t h e d i r e c t i o n ( e A r e "o v i n g h e r e . . i t h t h i s progra" %ouA re going to $earn ho( to re$a7 and enj o% se7 "ore. =ou donA t (ant to a$(a%s be on guard? (ound tighter than a spring? do %ouOrgasm Mastery This book is about ho( to be a "as ter? at choice? to enj o % $ots "or e p$eas ure for an e7tended period of ti "e. + dditiona$ $ %? %ouA re going to $earn to have different Fkinds F of orgas "s than %o uA re us ed to? as "an % as %o u (ant for as $ong as %o u choos e. /o( does nA t that s ound $ike "as ter %- = ouA re going to discover Bif %ou donAt a$read% kno(C that ejacu$ation doesnAt a$(a%s have to acco"pan% orgas". ThatAs ho( those ( hoA ve $earned thes e techniEues have "u$tip$e orgas"s? spas" after spas" that see" to go on forever but (ithout the sEuirting that for "ost of us ends the p$a%ti"e.

=ou "ight have heard that Tantrikas Bpractitioners adept at TantraC and other Eas tern gurus give up ejacu$ation entire$% or beco"e ce$ibate. .e$$? IA " not going to suggest that %o u take an% vo(s. +s an Orgas" *aster? %o u can choose to cu" or not. B u t $ e t " e ( a r n %o u ? a f t e r s o " e " o n t h s o f e 7 t e n d e d p r a c t i c e ? %o u " a % n o t (ant to cu" "uch an%"ore. ItAs O< if %ouAre thinking? Fno (a%? I enjo% s hooting "% ( ad too "uch.F IA " not going to argue ( ith that des ire s ince IA ve sure been there "os t of "% $ife. 2 ince %ouA $$ be the "aster? %ou can choose to do (hat gives %ou the "ost p$easure. Dust $et "e ask %ou this: F.hat (i$$ %ou choos e if %o u $earn to trans for " orgas "ic energ% into an un$i"ited ti "e$ es s ( ho$e bod%9 "ind9 s pirit a$tered s tate that fee$s so "uch better and reaches s o "uch higher than a fe( seconds of re$ease-F = es ? s ir? %o uA ve ju"ped on a train ( hos e des tinat ion is continuous ecs tatic fee$ings that are better than a Euick f$ash in the pan. But donAt (orr% about that no(. .hen %ou arrive at that e7a$ted station? %ouA$$ be ab$e to decide (hat %ou (ant to do.

1.! Cu"ing #uickl$ Is Co""on and Curable


+ s I "ention ed a$read %? cu"ing Euick$ % does nA t "ean that %o uA re broken. In f a c t ? i t A s " o r e c o " " o n t h a n %o u " i g h t t h i n k . I t A s j u s t n o t t h e k i n d o f t h i n g "ost gu%s discuss over a co$d one? is itOnly % Minutes& +ccording to so"e esti"ates? about !) percent of +"erican "en reach orgas" ear$ier than the%A d $ike. +$fred <inse%? one of the ear$iest (e$$9kno(n se7 researchers? found that 8 K of the "en he tested ejacu$ated (ithin t(o "in u t es o f va gi na $ en tr %. Th at s o un ds p re tt % Eu ic k? bu t IA ve b ea t th at r ec or d. =eah? once (hen I (as $earning to put a condo" on....oh? forget it? %ou probab$% donAt (ant to hear about that kind of sob stor%. +s 2ha"a te$$s c$ients... F*% first response is to assure "en that thereAs n o t h i n g A ( r o n g A ( i t h t h e " o r g a n i c a $ $ %. T h e % n e e d t o h e a r t h a t t h e i r s e 7 u a $

10

habits are a natura$ product of the (a% the% have Anot been taughtA to e 7 p e r i e n c e t h e i r s e 7 u a $ i t %. I t i s " e r e $ % e d u c a t i o n a n d p r a c t i c i n g n e ( h a b i t s that can transfor" their se7ua$ e7perience.F I read one as tro$ogica $ s tud% that s a%s cu"ing Euick$ % is a characteris t ic of s o " e 2 u n s i g n s . > u c k % "e ? I A " a 2 a g i t t a r i u s . I f I b e $ i e v e i t ? t h a t " e a n s t h a t IA$$ a$(a%s ejacu$ate too soon because the stars "ade "e that (a%. 2orr%? I just donA t bu% thes e e7p$anat ions that convince us ( eA re s tuck the (a % ( e are. + nd I donAt (ant %ou to accept an% e7cuse that sa%s %ouA$$ never $earn to be a $ong9 $asting $over. This book is a proven process for changing a$$ of that? no "atter ( h e n %o u ( e r e b o r n ? t o ( h a t p a r e n t s ? ( i t h ( h a t g e n e s . = e s ? t h e 1 $ t i "a t e Ecstatic 2o$ution is an eEua$ opportunit% e"p$o%er. B% the (a%? se7 therapists officia$$% ca$$ this condition Finvo$untar% ejacu$ationF to better describe (hat happens (hen the ti"ing of %our ejacu$ation is different t ha n %o u r pa rt ne rs . + c tu a$ $ %? th is ( h o$ e pr ed ic a "en t i s s i"p$ % a $i tt $e g ap i n %our $earning? not a ph%s ica$ disabi$it%. 6esearchers have sho(n that itAs :) to : K curab$e. >asting $onger is ver% possib$e to $earn? %ou just have to (ant to. = o u d o ? d o n A t %o u - = o u s i " p $ % n e e d t o s p e n d s o " e t i " e r e p r o g r a " " i n g %ourse$f and deve$oping so"e ne( ski$$s. 'hat 'omen (eally 'ant 2ha"a sa%s F*en over$ook signa$s $eading to ejacu$ating because the%Ave been conditioned to be$ieve that (o"en desire constant? hard? and fast $ove"aking ( hich defines %ou as a rea$ "an.F .eA re gonna tr% to change %o ur "ind about t h a t . I h a v e n A t d o n e a s c i e n t i f i c s t u d % B %e t C b u t " % e 7 p e r i e n c e p r o v e s " o s t (o"en (ant so"ething "ore Tantric. That "eans s$o(? sensuous? and fro" the heart as (e$$. +nd (hi$e (eAre on the subject of ti"ing? %ouAre (e$$ a(are that it takes t(o to Tango? right- That re"inds "e of a gir$friend I had ( hen I ( as in "% 2)s . + t that ti"e? $ike "ost "en? I (as "uch "ore e7citab$e than I a" no(. One night (e counted (hi$e (e (ere "aking $ove. 2he had 1) orgas"s in ha$f9an9hour. /ative +"ericans ca$$ this a Fdeer (o"an.F I guess because she (as ver% fast.

11

/ o ( %o u re a$ i5 e? th is is t he s a "e gu % B"eC ( ho s e p re vi ou s ( if e di dn A t ha ve vagina$ orgas"s? no "atter (hat (e did. 2ure? I fe$t it (as "% prob$e"? but in retrospect I did ever%thing I cou$d. In rea$it%? it (asnAt "% fau$t? just $ike %our ti"ing prob$e" "a% not be a$$ %our fau$t. *an% (o"en BIAve read esti"ates up to 8 KC donAt have orgas"s through intercourse. 2o if %ouAre driving %ourse$f cra5% tr%ing to do the i"possib$e? $ighten upG IA" not tr%ing to ta$k %ou out of $earning the ski$$s in the book to better enj o% intercourse. IA " jus t tr%ing to inject a $itt$e rea$it%. If %ou $earn to "ake $ove for hours? so"e (o"en "a% $ove i t b u t n e v e r h a v e t h e k i n d o f e 7 p $ o s i o n s o " e g u %s s e e " t o c r a v e . D u s t a c c e p t the fact? O<I kno( s o"e (o"en "eas ure their s e7ines s and s e$f9( orth b% their abi$it % to "ake a "an cu". +nd "an% of us "a$es have been progra""ed to be$ieve (eAre on$% viri$e if (e can $ast forever and cu" "an% ti"es a night. I do kno( gu%s $ike that. +s for "e? I donAt choose to be that kind of $over (ith those kind of partners. It doesnAt (ork for "e and doesnAt give "e p$easure $ike the f o $ $ o ( i n g p r o g r a " d o e s . B e c a u s e I k n o ( ( h a t I $ i k e a n d ( h a t ( o r k s f o r "e ? IA " pickier about ( ho I share p$eas ure ( ith. 4 oes nA t that s ound "ore $ike "aster% than being $ead around b% "% $itt$e head-

1.% Book Overvie&


=ou rea$i5e that IA" not pro"ising a Euick fi7 for a $ong9ter" situation? right6 at he r? th is bo ok of fe rs a $o ng 9t er " c ha ng e i n h o( %o u "ak e $o ve . > et "e brief$% (arn %ou (hatAs co"ing so %ouA$$ kno( (hatAs in store... Table Of Contents Chapter 1 9 I/T6O41CTIO/: .e just about finished the introduction. =ouAre "aking progress a$read%. Chapter 2 9 *EC,+/IC2 is about the "echanics of orgas"s? ejacu$ation? and se7ua$ energ%. It defines this bookAs "ethod? 6+*PE6. The $etters stand for 6e$a7? +(areness? *easure? Pace? Energ% circu$ation? and 6ide the (ave.

12

C hapter ! 9 2 O >O P6EP gives %o u individua$ e7ercis es that prepare %o u for greater se7ua$ sta"ina. C ha pt er ' 9 2 O >O * + 2 TE 6= t ea ch es i nd iv id ua $ "a s t er % t ec hn iE ue s th at c an stop %ou fro" going past the point of no return. C hapter 9 P + 6T/ E6 P 6EP gives %o u dua$ preparation e7ercis es %o u can do (ith a partner to deve$op the ski$$s for $onger $ove"aking. C hapter 0 9 >O @ E*+ < I/3 teaches s e7ua$ e7ercis es %o u do ( ith a partner to deve$op greater $ove"aking sta"ina and orgas"ic potentia$. C h a p t e r 8 9 T + / T 6 I C * + 2 T E 6 = p r e s e n t s t h e 1 $ t i "a t e E c s t a t i c 2 o $ u t i o n f o r tota$ Tantric Orgas" *aster%. Chapter & 9 ;I/+> T,O13,T2 is the conc$usion? inc$uding a g$ossar% of ter"s? resources? and fina$ advice. P$ease $ook here if an% ter"ino$og% confuses %ou. Tantric Terms I prefer to us e Tantric ter "s for our erogenous 5ones becaus e the % have de$ightfu$ pos itive connotations . 2o"e are traditiona$? so"e ca"e fro" our teacher *argot +nand? and others I "ade up. The%Are a$$ in the g$ossar% at the ver% end of the book but here are the "ain ones... Tantric .ord @ajra 2hiva $inga" 4eva"ani 6osetta =oni C$io Bod% Part penis an erection ba$$s? scrotu"? L testic$es a n u s ? assho$e vagina c$itoris Origin 2anskrit for divine thunderbo$t The ,indu god 2hiva is a$(a%s erect 2anskrit for divine ge"s? je(e$s? or pear$s *argotAs preferred na"e +ncient ,indu (ord *argotAs preferred na"e

13

"our Schedule C h a p t e r s ! t h r o u g h 8 c o n t a i n a b o u t ) e 7 e r c i s e s . I t "a % s o u n d $ i k e a $ o t ? b u t i t A s n o t r e a $ $ % t h a t d a u n t i n g . I n p $ a c e s I g i v e %o u t h r e e o r f o u r "e t h o d s t o choose fro" to $earn one ski$$. 2o"e of the practices %ouA$$ do on$% once. + fe( a r e o p t i o n a $ . * a n % %o u A $ $ r e p e a t s e v e r a $ t i " e s u n t i $ %o u " a s t e r t h e s k i $ $ s presented. 2o"e? I hope? (i$$ beco"e part of %our routine? as the% have for "e. IAd $ike to be ab$e to sa% ju"p around and do (hat fee$s right. But I canAt. The e 7 e r c i s e s a r e c u "u $ a t i v e ? ( h i c h "e a n s $ a t e r o n e s b u i $ d o n e a r $ i e r o n e s . T h i s isnAt to sa% %ou canAt b$o( through so"e of the stuff thatAs eas% for %ou ver% E ui ck $ %. 3 o ri gh t a he ad ? j us t t r % e ve r %t h i ng a nd s e e if %o u A v e go t th e kn ac k first. IA " as king %o u no( to co""i t to the $ong hau$. Idea$$ %? this is a !9"onth progra". If %ou practice an hour a da%? %ou "ight get through it in 2 "onths. *ore $ike$%? %ouA$$ practice severa$ ti"es a (eek and take ' to 0 "onths. Can %ou arrange that to beco"e an Orgas" *asterI reco""e nd agains t j us t an hour a ( eek. ItAs not enough to deve$op the "o "e n tu " ( h er e %o u r "a s t er % of on e s ki $$ bu i$ ds o n t he p re vi ou s o ne . IA v e been persona$$% doing this progra" for about a %ear and sti$$ continue "an% of the e7ercises regu$ar$%. 2o I kno( the va$ue of (hat IA" advising.

14

Chapter 2: 'echanics
Before (e get started (ith practices that (i$$ "ake %ou an Orgas" *aster? $etAs brief$ % cover a fe( of the "echani cs of the approach %ouA $$ $earn. , ere ( eA $$ revie( the anato "% of ej acu$ation? ( hat caus es it to happen before %ou ( ant? (h% Tantra is re$evant to this assign"ent? (hat %ouA$$ gain fro" "astering the 1 $ti "at e Ecs tatic 2 o$ution? and the for"u $a for "ak ing it ( ork. I kno( %ou donA t need to be ta$ked into the advantages of ti "ing %ou r cu"ing better? but %ou need to appreciate the incredib$e benefits that (i$$ be avai$ab$e to %ou (hen %ou "aster this "ethod.

2.1 The (nato"$ of E aculation


I t h i n k i t A s a g o o d b e t t h a t %o u A r e f a " i $ i a r ( i t h t h e o v e r a $ $ e 7 p e r i e n c e o f ejacu$ating. 6ight? %ou get e7cited? rea$$% turned on? sEuirt? and then %our dick gets soft. But thereAs "ore to it that %ou need to grasp? so to speak. IA" ta$king about the ver% p$easurab$e ten9second invo$untar% "usc$e contractions that (e ca$$ "a$e orgas". 2o"eti"es the% start "i$der and get s t r o n g e r ? b u t o n c e %o u p a s s t h e p o i n t o f n o r e t u r n ( i t h t h a t f i r s t s p a s " ? re$easing se"en to the outside ( or$d is inevitab$e for "os t of us. Be$ieve it or n ot ? %o uA r e go in g t o "a k e th os e i nv o$ un ta r % "us c$ e co nt ra ct i on s r es po nd to %our po(er of choice. .eAre a$$ a(are of the outco"e of an e7p$osive orgas". To be an Orgas" * as t er ? %o u n ee d be co "e "uc h "o re a ( a re o f t he i nt er na $ pr oc es s $ ea di ng up t o c u " i n g ? as ( e $ $ a s t h e a n a t o " % b e h i n d i t . T h e n %o u A $ $ b e i n a p os i t i o n t o c ha ng e th e s eE ue nc e o f ev en ts th at $ ea d to s Eu ir ti ng . 2 o"e o f th e s %"p t o "s t h a t p r e c e d e o r g a s " i c c o n t r a c t i o n s t h a t %o u A $ $ b e c o " e " o r e s e n s i t i v e t o inc$ude... %our breathing speeds up to the point of panting? %our heart rate and b$ood pressure increase rapid$%?

15

%our $egs and butt tens e up? and %our pe$vic "usc$es tighten? %our deva"ani Btestic$esC e$evate and dra(9up against %our bod%? %ou beco"e ob$ivious to the outside (or$d for a $itt$e (hi$e.

4id %ou kno( cu"ing is rea$$% a t(o9stage process- E"ission and e7pu$sion. Emission )hase* =our prostate g$and? that va$uab$e (a$nut9si5ed g$and a $ong9finger9(idth i n s i d e %o u r r e c t u " ? a u t o " a t i c a $ $ % c o n t r a c t s a n d e " p t i e s s e " i n a $ f $ u i d i n t o %our urethra. ThatAs the tube that carries se"en and urine through %our genita$ s%ste" and out the head of %our penis. E+,ulsion )hase* 6 h %t h " i c ( a v e $ i k e s o f t 9 " u s c $ e c o n t r a c t i o n s p r o p e $ t h e s e " e n d o ( n %o u r u r e t h r a a n d o u t t h e h e a d o f %o u r p e n i s ( h e r e t h o s e $ i t t $ e s ( i " " e r s h a v e a brief fight for s urviva$ and us ua$$% $os e. Thes e contractions of %ou r pe$vic "usc$es that cause the actua$ re$ease of se"en are a$so the "ain ones that cause the fantastic p$easure. /o( hereAs the good ne(s: b% strengthening those "usc$es and heightening %ou r s ens itivit % of this ( ho$e proces s ? %o u can avoid the e"is s ion phas e a$together and sti$$ enjo% the (onderfu$ ecstas% of the e7pu$sion spas"s ( ithout the sEuirting. .hen I do this ? "% vaj ra gets des ens iti5ed brief$ % so I can pu"p vigorous$% again for a (hi$e before repeating the (ho$e c%c$e as "an% ti"es as I (ant. +"ongst (e se7 professiona$s? our technica$ ter" for this is dr% orgas". Dust kidding? I rea$$ % donAt kno( (hat doctors ca$$ it. 4 id %ou ever e7perience oneI a c t u a $ $ % h a d a f e ( d r % o r g a s " s s o " e %e a r s a g o b e f o r e I k n e ( ( h a t ( a s happening. >ater? ( hen I ( as $earning O rgas " * as ter %? the gu % in the ne7t r o o " b r a g g e d h e h a d 0 ) d r % c u "s i n t h e f i r s t t h r e e d a %s o f o u r ( e e k 9 $ o n g c o u r s e . = e s ? I h a t e d h i " a t t h e t i "e . + n d I ( a n t e d t o n a i $ h i s g i r $ f r i e n d t o o ? but ho( cou$d I (ith such a stud in the sadd$e first- /o( I $ove hi" because

16

he cha$$enged "e to $earn the sa"e thing. +nd %ou can too. B% the (a%? thanks? *arco. O<? thatAs the end of the anato"% $esson. But thereAs another even better (a% to describe (hat cu"ing is a$$ about fro" a Tantric perspective. =ou bui$d up s e7 ua $ t en s i on th ro ug h "or e a nd "o re ar ou s a $ u nt i$ %o u s ee "i ng $ % h av e n o other option but to re$ease the se7ua$ energ% through ejacu$ating. In fact? the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution to "astering dr% orgas"s and un$i"ited sta"ina is recircu$ating the energ% (ithin %our bod%. If %ou can spread the e7cite"ent a$$ over? not on$% does it fee$ great? but the urge to sEuirt subsides. This is the rea$ po(er and reEuires using Tantric practice (hich (eA$$ get to short$%.

2.2 Causes Of Pre"ature E aculation


I f i t bu "s %o u o ut t o th in k ab ou t a$ $ t ha t g oe s ( r on g ( h en %o u cu " to o s oo n? %o u " i g h t b e t e " p t e d t o s k i p t h i s s e c t i o n . B u t d o n A t . T h o u g h I A " s u r e %o u kno( so"e of the"? IA$$ bet %ou arenAt a(are of a$$ of the factors that can cause too rapid ti "ing of %o ur orgas ". In fact? after a $ong career of ej acu$ator % "as t er %? so"e "en acEuire this condition te"porar i$ % becaus e one or "ore of these causes rear their ug$% head. - The .rge To Cum I (ant to hit the biggie right on the head at the outset here. .hen (e get turned on? s o"ething ins ide takes over and convinces us to j us t $et go. ThatA s ( h a t I c a $ $ t h e u r g e t o c u ". T h e r e a $ ( a %s u s e d t o b e a r a t i o n a $ i 5 a t i o n i n " % head that see"ed to "ake sense in the "o"ent (h% I shou$d b$o( "% (ad. I usua$$% regretted it $atter. It "a % s ound $ike circu$ar reas oning to s a% that the urge to cu" is the reas on %o u c u " t o o E u i c k . . e a $ $ h a v e t h e u r g e t o o r g a s " ? r i g h t - . e $ $ ? o f c o u r s e . + nd for a "i cros econd I donA t ( ant to give %ou the idea that thereA s an%th ing (rong (ith it. The craving for p$easure is (hat $ife is about. <eep that up? for 3od and 3oddessAs sake. But (hat kind of orgas" are (e ta$king about seeking here- =ours? a Euickie? %our $overAs? or a fu$$ bod% "u$tip$e one- The bio$ogica$ urge to cu" circu"vents %our po(er of choice in the "atter.

17

+s a resu$t of over !) %ears he$ping peop$e change their behavior? IA" convinced th at fe ( s u cc ee d a t 2 T O P P I/ 3 s o"et h in g th e % d on A t ( a nt t o d o. Th e s e cr et is to rep$ace ( hat %ou donA t ( ant ( ith so"ething better that %ou do ( ant. ; ortunate$ %? the 1 $ti"a te Ecs tatic 2 o$ution is s o"ething s o "uch better that once %o u deve$op the knack of inner orgas " fro" the e7ercis es in this book? %ouA$$ never (ant to go back and spra% %our seed outside. Over/ helming E+citement This "ust have happened to a$$ of us at $east once if not freEuent$ %? as it did ( i t h "e . = o u A r e r e a $ $ % a t t r a c t e d t o t h a t c o " p $ e t e $ % s e 7 % t h i n g ( h o a c t u a $ $ % ( ants to have s e7 ( ith %ou . =ouA re s o turned on b% the ( ho$e pros pect that before %o u kno( it? %o u cu" in %ou r shorts or? even ( ors e? a$$ over her s kirt. 3od? I hate re"e"bering those e"barrassing ti"es and (ou$dnAt "ention it if I (asnAt confident this (i$$ soon be a thing of the past for %ou. Being over(he$"ing$% e7cited is akin to being a red9b$ooded hea$th% "a$e. The %ounger a "an is? the "ore e7citab$e he tends to be. ItAs co""on that the first fe( ti"es %oung? ine7perienced "en have se7 (ith a partner? the% have troub$e c o n t r o $ $ i n g t h e i r r e s p o n s e . 2 i n c e ( e h a v e n A t b e e n t a u g h t a n % o t h e r ( a %? ( e j us t b $i nd $ % fo $$ o( t he n at ur a$ f$ oo d s ur gi ng i ns id e us a nd s o on ou r p an ts a re ( et. 2o "an % of us jus t havenA t $earned that there is another ( a% to dea$ ( ith t h e h u g e e n e r g % b u i $ d 9 u p . I f %o u A r e p a t i e n t a n d ( i $ $ i n g t o ( a i t a d e c a d e o r th re e? hi gh e7 ci ta b i $i t % ( i $$ "e $ $o ( ( it h ag e. I f %o u A d $ ik e a s o $u ti on s oo ne r? read on. Tension 0 An+iety The secret Bcan I trust %ou (ith it-C to ejacu$ator% "aster% is re$a7ation. There a r e s o "a n % t h i n g s t h a t c a n c r e a t e t e n s i o n a n d a n 7 i e t % i n t h e s c a r % a r e n a o f se7? IA" actua$$% astounded ho( "an% "en $earn to pace the"se$ves in the sack. ,ere are just a fe( of the co""on stresses that can cause too9rapid cu"in g... ti"e pressure se$f9doubt

18

re$igious gui$t? thinking se7 is bad? dirt%? or i""ora$ fear of getting caught tiredness or sickness re$ationship stress (orries about pregnanc% or 2T4s Bse7ua$$% trans"itted diseasesC perfor"ance an7iet% Ba" I good enough to satisf% "% partner-C

tr%ing not to cu". Can %ou be$ieve that $ast one- Thinking about not sEuirting can actua$$% "ake %ou "ore $ike$% to b$o( too soon. =es? a"a5ing? but true. Conditioning To Go 1ast 2e7 therapists c$ai" that c$i"a7ing Euick$% "a% begin during %outh and then beco"e an unconscious? ph%sica$$% ingrained habit that persists $ater in $ife. ,avenAt "ost of us gro(n up being afraid of getting discovered having se76e"e"ber? "an% of our first se7ua$ encounters (ere rushing it in the back seat of our dadAs Chev% or on the $iving roo" couch (ith the fo$ks due back an% "inute. .e (ere so (orried about getting caught in the act? that se7 (as often hurried and unsatisf%ing. + nd ( hat about "aking it ( ith our firs t true $ove 9 our hand- B; or "e? itA s "% $eft for sure.C To $i"it our chances of being found out? "asturbating for as Euick a re$ease as possib$e (as the nor". 2ha"a sa%s F*en are progra""ed to be$ieve that itAs best not to be caught "as turb ating for a "%ri ad of reas ons . This is often done in s tea$th and Euick$ % to obtain p$easure and re$ease. It a$s o tends to set up a certain habit of tens ion in the bod%? (here se7ua$ "atters are concerned? that beco"es the pattern for o t h e r s e 7 u a $ e 7 p e r i e n c e s $ a t e r o n . 2 o f i r s t ? "e n " a s t u r b a t e a n d c u " E u i c k $ % in the sho(er or in their beds? hoping not to get caught. Then the% "ake $ove ( ith their gir$friends in the back s eat of the car or in their roo"? s ti$$ hoping not to get caught. +nd the% carr% this into the rest of their $ives and "arriages? not kno(ing that there can be an% other (a%.F IA" not even going to "ention the conditioning of the circ$e jerk if %ou (ere so fortunate as to have participated in that kind of evo$ved ath$etic event.

19

- Goal of Orgasm .e $ive in a (or$d structured around goa$s? standards? and $iving up to e7pectations. .hatAs the "edia9driven perfor"ance standard for the idea$ "a cho "a $e $over- = ou kno( ( o"en so ( e$$ that %o u p$eas e an% and a$$. = ou p$a% each one so (e$$ unti$ the% $ose contro$ and their desire overpo(ers the". 1 nti$ the % go co"p$e te$ % bers erk ( ith pas s ion? %ouA re the s trong s i$ent t %p e. T h e n ? i n a ( i $ d r e $ e a s e p r o v i n g t h a t %o u A r e t h e b e s t ? %o u h a v e a " o n s t r o u s orgas" si"u$taneous$%. ; ace it? gu %s ? the Big O Ba s trong e7p$os ive orgas "C is ( hat our s e7ua$$ % repressed and unevo$ved societ% "easures us against. .eAre raised (ith the be$ief that the purpos e of "aking $ove is to re$eas e a$$ that pent9up s e7ua$ energ % ( ith the "os t intens e orgas " poss ib$e. O ften ( e get trapped in our partnerAs si"i$ar be$ief driven b% $ong periods of being unsatisfied se7ua$$%. +s (onderfu$ as that e7perience is? %ou "ight be surprised to $earn ho( i"portant "an% other things are Bcudd$ing? caring? sensitivit%C to the average (o"an. I read a s tud % recent$ % that Euoted 8)K of ( o"en (ou$d choos e inti"ac % over se7. .eAre progra""ed to rush head$ong to(ard orgas" as fast as (e can go. In o u r h a s t e ? ( e "i s s s o "a n % s e n s a t i o n s a n d e 7 p e r i e n c e s a $ o n g t h e ( a %. T h e . e s t e r n v i e ( o f s e 7 i s a r a c e t o t h e c $ i " a 7 a f t e r ( h i c h $ o v e r s p h %s i c a $ $ % co$$apse. The 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution is c$oser to the Eastern vie( of ph%sica$ $ove (hich s$o($% brings both partners to higher and higher heights of ecstas% ti"e and ti"e again. ThatAs (hat (eAre ai"ing to "aster (ith Tantra. - The Mind .ithout a doubt? the "ind is a po(erfu$ se7 organ. *% be$oved friend and popu$ar Tantra teacher in 2an 4iego? 4r. +nastas ,arris? teaches that F(here attention goes? energ% f$o(s.F ;ocus on p$easure and %our e7perience beco"es "ore intense. Think about not cu"ing and %ou (i$$ do it an%(a%.

20

.e a$$ attract ( hat ( e focus on. ; or e7a "p$e? if %o ur ( ho$e attent ion is on %o u r g e n i t a $ s ? t h a n %o u r s e 7 u a $ e n e r g % h a s n o ( h e r e e $ s e t o g o b u t o u t t h a t $itt$e ho$e in %our $itt$e head. If %ouAre intent on the goa$ of giving %our partner an orgas"? then %ouAre $ike$% to attract one too soon 9 na"e$% one of %our o(n. Case histories of ps%cho$ogica$ reasons for pre"ature ejacu$ation abound. This approach is the 1 $ti"ate Ecs tatic 2 o$ution so that %ou $earn to enj o% s e7 even "ore (hi$e "anaging ejacu$ation. The "indAs tricks 9 goa$s %ouAre tota$$% absorbed in or pervading "enta$ i"ages 9 get in the (a% of %ou tuning into the p r e s e n t " o " e n t . . i t h t h e s e c o n s u " i n g i n t e r n a $ d i s t r a c t i o n s ? h o ( c a n %o u tru$% appreciate (hatAs happening no(- Instead? %ou need to shift %our a t t e n t i o n t o %o u r s e n s es ? %o u r ( h o $ e b o d %? f e e $ i n g s a n d s e ns a t i o n s 9 a $ $ t h e sources of p$easure i"aginab$e. >ots "ore about this $ater. The ess ence of this 1 $ti "a te Ecs tati c 2 o$ution is to get out of %ou r head and into %o ur bod%. 6e$a7 and s ta % in the "o "e nt? tuning into thos e ( onderfu$ f e e $ i n g s e " a n a t i n g f r o " %o u r s e n s i t i v e p $ a c e s . 4 r o p a $ $ %o u r s t a n d a r d s a n d goa$s and just ride the ( ave of energ%. 4onAt pus h %ours e$f or %our partner for the B ig O . .hen %ou $earn to s urf %ou r s e7ua$ energ% ( ithout atte"pting to c on tr o$ th e ou tc o "e ? %o u A $ $ b e ab $e t o go ( i th t he f $o ( i n a $ oo s e an d na tu ra $ (a% indefinite$%. - Se,arate 2ot 3oint E+,erience In our societ%? for the "ost part? se7 is a private e7perience because itAs a taboo s ubj ect. .e hide our ins ecurities ? "ake rude jokes ? and donA t ta$k about it open$ %. Too "an % of us obs es s about (hen to "ake the firs t "ove? or ho( to initia te ( ith a $ong9ti"e partner ins tead of jo %o us $ % enj o %i ng verba$ forep$a%. /o (onder so "an% of us bui$d up the an7ieties and tensions (e ta$ked about ear$ier that can cause pre"ature ejacu$ation. .eAre not taught that se7 is co""union bet(een sou$s e7pressing their basic nature through the divine gift of bodies. ;e( of us $earn to p$a% these i n s t r u " e n t s i n h a r "o n % t o p r o d u c e a " a 5 i n g e c s t a s %. . h e r e d o ( e $ e a r n t h a t se7 is an energ% e7change bet(een conscious beings (ho (ant to both give and receive p$easure-

21

.hen %o uA re des ired and accepted for ( ho %o u are ( ithout big e7pectat ions a b o u t h o ( %o u n e e d t o p e r f o r "? t h e n %o u c a n r e $ a 7 a n d $ e t n a t u r e t a k e i t A s s e 7 u a $ c o u r s e . T h a t A s p a r t $ % ( h % t h e 1 $ t i "a t e E c s t a t i c 2 o $ u t i o n r e E u i r e s FpartneringF ( ith %o ur $overs . This "e ans being a( are of %o ur needs and r e a c t i o n s ? t a $ k i n g h o n e s t $ % a b o u t t h e "? h o n o r i n g t h o s e o f %o u r p a r t n e r ? a n d p$a %i ng together as eEua$s . Ins tead of A doingA %o ur partner? %o uA $ $ need to do ne(9age things $ike sharing together. BCo"e on? donAt gag? be open to dra"atic change? budd%. =ouAre here because %ou chose to beco"e different? right-C B % t h e ( a %? e v e r %t h i n g i n t h e 1 $ t i " a t e E c s t a t i c 2 o $ u t i o n i s c o " p $ e t e $ % app$icab $e to s a"e gender s e7. Tantra has a $ot to s a% about %in and %a ng energies? (hich ( e nor"a$$% ass ociate (ith fe"a$e and "a$e genders. But e7perienced practitioners $earn that ( e a$$ have both energies ( ithin and can act on both if ( e practice. IA ve tried to "ake the $anguage inoffens ive to ga % and $esbian partners but I probab$% havenAt done a perfect job. 2o p$ease accept this dis c$ai"er that ever%th ing inc$uded is app$icab$e and intended for %o u to o. I n f ac t? 2 .E .J . b ei ng 2 ub t$ e En er g % eJ c ha ng e p ro ba b$ % ap p$ ie s "or e for sa"e se7 partners. 4ifferent partners have different se7ua$ responses. IAve been (ith (o"en (ho cou$d cu" ver% Euick$%? but "ost need $ots of sti"u$ation. *%se$f? I a$(a%s $ike $ots of touching a$$ over "% bod%. If vajra gets too "uch attention too Euick$%? itAs a$$ over for both of us. 2o (hoAs responsib$e for seeing that each partner gets the things that bring the" the "ost p$easure- .e each are fu$$% r e s p o n s i b $ e . P a r t n e r i n g " e a n s s p e a k i n g %o u r n e e d s a n d h o n o r i n g t h o s e o f %o u r pa rt ne rs . I f ( e d o an %t h i n g e $s e? ( e s e t u p th e d %n a "i c s th at p ro du ce stress? "%ster%? and tension 9 a surefire prescription for b$o(ing %our (ad une7pected$%. If %ouAre sing$e and searching for a partner to satisf% se7ua$$%? this (ho$e vie( of se7 as co""union "a% sound even "ore cha$$enging than finding so"eone ( i $ $ i n g t o j u "p i n t h e s a c k . B P $ e a s e ? n o p a p e r b a g j o k e s . C I f %o u e 7 p e c t t h a t %ou a$one (i$$ be ab$e to satisf% an% (o"an (ithout their cooperation? %ouAre $aboring under a big de$usion? friend. 4rop the (ho$e concept that itAs %our job a$one to satisf% %our partner. This is a "utua$ dance and thatAs the (a% "ost

22

( o"en $ove it. >ater? IA $$ s ho( %o u ho( to broach this de$ica te s ubj ect ( ith potentia$ partners that (i$$ "ake %ou see" "ore desirab$e to the"? not $ess. )rostatitis Being part of the first e"ission phase of ejacu$ation? the prostate g$and is a vita$ co"ponent of %our se7ua$ eEuip"ent. If itAs inf$a"ed or en$arged? ca$$ed prostatitis? it can easi$% "ake %ou "ore sensitive to sti"u$ation and "ore $ike$% t o c u " a t a " o " e n t A s n o t i c e . I f %o u A r e v e r % s e n s i t i v e d o ( n t h e r e o r h a v e troub$e peeing? see %our ph%sician for a referra$ to a uro$ogist to check %ou out. +nd if %ouAre taking an% prescription drugs? discuss se7ua$ side effects that %ou cou$d be e7periencing. ; ortunate$ %? there are s o"e natura$ re"edi es that can i"prove %ou r pros tate h e a $ t h . I t a k e 2 a ( P a $ "e t t o a n d P %g e u " d a i $ %? t ( o n a t u r a $ h e r b s %o u c a n g e t at the hea$th food store. 6esearch has sho(n these supp$e"ents can he$p %our prostate significant$%. I regu$ar$% hear about ne( ones and tr% the" a$$. . h i $ e ( e A r e o n t h e s u b j e c t ? t h e r e a r e s o "e o t h e r c o "" o n s u b s t a n c e s ( h i c h can inf$a "e %ou r pros tate and "ake %ou "ore s ens itive to cu"ing. Can %ou g u e s s ( h a t t h e % a r e - 6 i g h t ? IA " t a $ k i n g a b o u t c a f f e i n e ? n i c o t i n e ? a n d a $ c o h o $ . If %ou s"oke and drink coffee and a$coho$? %ou (ou$d be (e$$ advised to avoid the" during this progra". B e$ieve "e? IA " not a "ora $is t tr %i ng to convince %o u of %o ur evi$ ( a%s . IA ve tried "ost ever%thing and be$ieve in (hatever brings p$easure. .hen IA" (arning %ou about irritating %our prostate? itAs just a "edica$ fact. +$coho$ and s "oking are the nu"ber one reas on that "en over !) have erection prob$e "s . Other "edications and recreationa$ drugs can have significant affects on %our s e 7 u a $ "a s t e r % a s ( e $ $ . T h e 1 $ t i "a t e E c s t a t i c 2 o $ u t i o n ? b e i n g c o "p $ e t e $ % natura$? (i$$ go better if %ou eat (e$$ and avoid an% of these sti"u$ants. General 4ealth 2e7 reEuires energ% (hich is dra(n fro" %our "etabo$is". IA" not just ta$king a b o u t ( i $ d a t h $ e t i c f u c k i n g . , i g h s t a t e s o f a r o u s a $ a n d t h e p h %s i c a $ c h a n g e s

23

that resu$t $ike faster breathing and higher b$ood pressure can be ver% draining. Being fatigued or dep$eted can contribute to higher9than9 average c$i"a7 sensitivit%. ConseEuent$%? if %our hea$th is $ess than ste$$ar? %ou "a% be "ore $ike$% to cu" invo$untari$ %. 2o"e over( eight "en a$s o tend to be cu" "ore easi$%. The kind of food %ou eat can be "ore draining than energi5ing. E7perts advis e that a hea$th % diet that nouris hes the bod% can contribute to s e 7 u a $ ( e $ $ 9 b e i n g . * o d e r a t e e 7 e r c i s e h e $ p s b % s t i "u $ a t i n g t h e " e t a b o $ i c path( a%s %ou dra( on during se7. If %ouA re tr%ing to fi7 one c%$inder of a @& engine? it "a% never run s"ooth$% at top speed if the others are (eak. )sychological Bloc#s I A " t a k i n g t h e o p t i " i s t i c v i e ( ( h i c h ( o r k s "o r e t h a n : K o f t h e t i "e . T h a t vie( is that using the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution is si"p$% a retraining process. B ut I do ( an t to a$ er t %o u to th e s "a $ $ c ha nc e th at s o "e t h in g d ee pe r i n t he "ind can b$ock %our progress . There is a s eg"ent of "en (ho freEuent$% cu" too Euick$% because of unreso$ved ps%cho$ogica$ issues. 2o"e of the therapies (hich can he$p reso$ve these b$ocking energies are... Persona$ Counse$ing Trau"atic Incident 6eduction 6e$ationship Counse$ing Tantric 2e7ua$ ,ea$ing.

If %ouAre not "aking progress through the practices (hich fo$$o(? or if %ouAre having troub$e s ta%ing the cours e (ith the progra"? cons ider consu$ting ( ith a s e7 therapist or appropriate professiona$. Deffre and I (ork (ith c$ients of a$$ t%pes? so"eti"es $ong9distance b% phone. =ou can e"ai$ "e for so"e introductor% $ong9distance advice at "ai$to:2o"rajMTantra+tTahoe.co" and "a %be ( e can Euick$% pinpoint ( hat %o u need to breakthrough. If not? IA $$ suggest ho( %ou can acce$erate %our progra" through therap%.

24

.ith that s$i" chance "entioned? forget about it. IA" confident that fo$$o(ing the progra" (i$$ be just (hat %ou need.

2.! )o& Can Tantra )elp*


B eing an ancient s piritua$ s cience of s acred s e7? ho( can Tantra he$p- The pri"ar % ans ( er is that Tantra is about "as tering %o ur o( n energ %. IA " not referring to so"e obscure i"aginar% ne( age air%9 fair% pheno"enon here. IA" ta$king about ph%sica$ stuff %ou fee$ a$$ the ti"e. ,o( do %ou beco"e a(are of being turned on? or angr%? or nervous? or in $ove- =our interna$ energ% causes s e n s a t i o n s i n %o u r b o d %. I t A s ( h a t a c u p u n c t u r i s t s a n d " a s s a g e t h e r a p i s t s (ork (ith ever% da%. To be sure? at first the energ% that Tantric adepts (ork (ith see"s finer or s u b t $ e r t h a n a p u n c h i n t h e f a c e o r a "o u t h s u c k i n g %o u o f f . B u t u $ t i "a t e $ %? subt$e energ% can be "uch "ore po(erfu$ than hard fast pu"ping. That re"inds "e of a reserved fe"a$e business associate at her first Tantra (orkshop (ho e7perienced an hour of po(erfu$ non9stop orgas"ic vibrations shaking her (ho$e bod% just fro" a basic breathing e7ercise. 2o"e sa% that (o"en are genera$$% "ore sensitive to energ%. *a%be so? but of c o u r s e g u %s f e e $ i t ? s o "e o f u s s t r o n g $ %. . h a t c a u s e s g o o s e b u " p s - + c h i $ $ d o ( n %o u r s p i n e - 2 h i v e r s o r t i c k $ i s h n e s s - O r " o r e d i r e c t $ % o n o u r s u b j e c t ? ho( about that ting$% (ar" fee$ing in %our crotch (hen %ou see a ver% shape$% fe"a$e for" s(a%ing a (ide path do(n the side(a$k.hen (e refer to energ% in Tantra? (e "ean the nervous sti"u$ation and ph%sica$ e7citation that causes these fee$ings. =ou fee$ energ% strongest just before an orgas"? thus the ter" Forgas"ic energ%.F But itAs a$$ the sa"e e$ectrica$ or "agnetic stuff in %our bod%. 6egard$ess of (hatAs causing %our dissatisfaction (ith %our $ove"aking ski$$s? energ% is at the root of it. Tantra teaches ho( to conjure up orgas"ic energ%? heighten %our senses of its effects? "agnif% its i"pact? and circu$ate it around t he b od %. .h % bo th er $ ea rn in g h o( t o ch an ne $ e ne rg %- Be ca us e if i t a$ $ s ta %s in %our cock? the easiest direction for it to "ove is out(ards. +nd then %ou

25

c u". 2 pr ea d t ha t s e7 ua $ en er g % ar ou nd a nd %o u fe e$ gr ea t a$ $ ov er ( it ho ut a s udden big gus h. +s a res u$t? %ou can have $ots of $itt$ e energ% gus hes (hich get bigger and bigger and bigger? cu$"inating in a $ong series of dr% interna$ energ% orgas"s. =ou have so "uch e7uberance bubb$ing inside %ou. Ce$ebrate that (onderfu$ orgas"ic energ% that "akes %ou cu". If %ou can "aster the "ove"ent of this po(erfu$ energ%? (h% $i"it these (onderfu$ desires that spring to $ife- +$$ %ou need to $earn is directing that po(erfu$ urge to cu" in(ard instead of out(ard. ThatAs (h% this is the 1$ti"ate EC2T+TIC 2o$ution? $earning to distribute and e7tend that ecstatic energ%. 2o %ouA$$ kno( (hat to e7pect? $et "e introduce %ou to so"e of the basic Tantra princip$es %ouA$$ find appearing in this approach over and over... 6e$a7 and go (ith the f$o(? a$$o(ing natura$ forces to run their course. 4onAt be inhibited and resist hea$th% i"pu$ses? Be supre"e$% conscious of ever%thing (hi$e (atching and enjo%ing. B e pres ent in the "o"ent and open %our ph%s ica$ senses. *ake $ove on "u$tip$e $eve$s: se7? heart? and spirit. ;ocus on p$easure in the "o"ent? not si"p$% on achieving the big O? =ou are responsib$e for %our o(n p$easure and responses. <no( (hat %ou desire? (hat %our boundaries are? and voice the". E " p t % %o u r " i n d o f g o a $ s a n d a n 7 i e t i e s ? $ e t t i n g s e 7 b e c o " e a t i " e $ e s s b$issfu$ "editation. + $$o( orgas " to beco"e a s acred energ% event? 2 EP+ 6+ TE fro" ph %s ica$ ejacu$ation. /o( doesnAt that sound "uch better than $earning tight contro$? a$(a%s (atching %ourse$f? tr%ing not to s$ip? and fee$ing bad (hen %ou doCh a#ras *an% ancient cu$tures? particu$ar$% in the East? studied our subt$e energies and devis ed "ethods to gain greater "as ter % over the". Co""on to "an % practices are the FchakrasF. These are energ% centers or vortices inside the bod%? residing fro" the botto" of the spine to the top of the head. Though

26

energ % is energ%? ( hen itA s generated in a s pecific chakra or s ett$es in one? it fee$s uniEue and affects %ou different$% than if it ca"e fro" another p$ace. .h% s hou$d %ou care- ;or t( o "ain reasons... 1C *ost $ove partners (ant "ore than just a $ust connection fro" the se7 c h a k r a a n d " e r g i n g e n e r g % a t " u $ t i p $ e c h a k r a s s a t i s f i e s t h e " i " " e n s e $ %. +nd... 1C .eA$$ use the invisib$e channe$ that connects the chakras? the inner f$ute? to "ove orgas "i c energ% a( a% fro" %ou r genita$s s o it (onA t "ake %ou cu" too soon. ,ere are the co""on definitions of the seven chakras... N 1st 2nd !rd 'th th 0th 8th >ocation Perineu" Bbase of spineC Be$$% B2 inches be$o( nave$C 2o$ar P$e7us ,eart Throat ;orehead B!rd e%eC Cro(n Btop of headC ;unction 2e7? surviva$ Bod%? sensations Po(er? (i$$ >ove? co"passion Creativit%? e7pression Perception. consciousness 4ivine connection

Energy Tools +gain and again? %ouA$$ receive advice in this book about using the four CO6/E62TO/E2 of ecstas% through Tantric practice... presence Bre$a7ation? "enta$ focus? and concentrationC? breath? sound? and "ove"ent. These "a% see" $ike si"p$e ph%sica$ ski$$s? and the% are. .hen %ou use the" conscious$% to get %our se7ua$ "otor running? the% can be ecstatic too$s.

27

= ou "ight think that %o u a$read % kno( ( hat kind of ph%s i ca$ attributes Btits ? a s s ? c r o t c h ? e t c . C t u r n %o u o n . B u t t h o s e a r e e 7 t e r n a $ s t i " u $ i . T h e f o u r cornerstones are interna$ too$s %ou can use to energi5e %our o(n p$easure and s t e e r %o u r o ( n e 7 c i t e " e n t . I n f a c t ? ( e A $ $ u s e t h e s e t o o $ s t o s i " u $ a t e a n d u$ti"ate$% create the fee$ings of orgas": intense focus on sensations? deep breathing through the "outh? sinuous bod% vibrations (ith pe$vic thrusts? and "oans of p$easure. *ore i"portant$%? (eA$$ use these four cornerstones to spread the over(he$"ing e7citation of se7ua$ p$a% a(a% fro" the genita$s. *an% of the e7ercises in the co"ing chapters direct$% uti$i5e these four cornerstones. >et "e reco""end a great (a% to practice the" and deve$op %ou r s ens itivi t % to and "as ter % of energ%. ItA s a "oving "edi tat ion ca$$ed C hakra B reathing. I havenA t inc$uded it here becaus e it reEuires a C4 ( ith d %n a " i c " u s i c t o g u i d e t h e a c t i o n . I t h e $ p s %o u c $ e a n s e a n d e n e r g i 5 e %o u r c h a k r a s ? b e c o " i n g "o r e a t t u n e d t o t h e s u b t $ e r f r e E u e n c i e s ( e A $ $ b e ( o r k i n g (ith throughout the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution progra". =ou can easi$% get the C4 through the resources section of our (ebsite http:OO(((.tantraattahoe.co"Oresources.ht" . If %ouAre (i$$ing to spend a fe( e 7 t r a b u c k s t o s p e e d %o u r p r o g r e s s i " " e n s e $ %? I s t r o n g $ % u r g e %o u t o d o Chakra Breathing severa$ ti"es a (eek.

2.% +h$ ,ot E aculate*


I kno( I donAt have to convince %ou that $asting $onger is a great idea. But $et " e j u s t " e n t i o n t h a t %o u c a n A t e 7 p e r i e n c e t h e k i n d o f e c s t a t i c ( a v e ( e A r e seeking here if %ou rush head$ong to(ards orgas" or tr% to ho$d %ourse$f back. =ou have to $earn to re$a7 into intense p$easure in order to go higher and higher. 3 u %s a r g u e ( i t h "e a $ $ t h e t i "e a b o u t t h e i r c o n f u s e d i d e a t h a t T a n t r a "e a n s not cu"ing. It does nA t have to be that ( a% or an% ( a %. .hen %o u $earn to go higher and higher forever? the si"u$taneous orgas" (ith %our partner (i$$ be incredib$ e. * ore i"port ant$ %? ( hen the ecs tas % of the ride is greater than the brief s purt at the end? %o u "a % never ( ant to cu" again. But ( onA t it be nice ( hen itA s %ou r choice and %o u can decide to s Euirt or not as the "ood s trikes %ou-

28

+n%(a%? IAve inc$uded a $ist of benefits %ouA$$ receive b% $earning this s%ste" so %ou can appreciate ho( po(erfu$$% it "a% i"pact %ou. ,ereAs (hat "an% of us $ose b% cu"ing too Euick$%... *an% (o"en are "u$ti9orgas"ic because their energ% isnAt dep$eted b% orgas". =ou donAt (ant to cu" (hen sheAs read% for "ore. *an% "enAs erections donAt spring back to $ife after cu"ing. In "% )s? it

s o " e t i " e s t a k e s " e a c o u p $ e d a %s t o r e c o v e r " % a b i $ i t % t o s t a % h a r d f o r $ong. 2e7 therapists ca$$ this the Frefractor% period.F 2o having an orgas" ( ithout ej acu$ating $ets %o u repeat $ove"aking as Euick$ % and often as %ou (ant. * an% "en re$eas e $ots of energ% ( hen the % ej acu$ate ( hich "ak es the" di s t an t? s $e ep %? an d e7 ha us te d. 4 o nA t cu " a nd %o u ca n s ta % en er ge ti c a$ $ night $ong. *an% "en $ose the desire to continue "aking $ove (hen the% b$o( their (ad? sudden$% $osing that c$oseness and inti"ac% (o"en crave. 2o"e describe it as if a po(er s(itch (as turned off. * a n % " e n s h u t d o ( n e " o t i o n a $ $ % a n d " e n t a $ $ % a s ( e $ $ a s p h %s i c a $ $ %? c u t t i n g o f f t h e c o " " u n i o n a t "u $ t i p $ e $ e v e $ s t h a t T a n t r a c a n h e $ p %o u achieve. +nd just to $eave %ou (ith the positive aspects? b% not cu"ing %ou can... , ave hours of orgas "ic p$eas ure ins tead of j us t a fe( s econds of intens e re$ease. E7perience continuous ecstas % at its peak throughout %our (ho$e bod%. 2ta% connected (ith %our partner $onger? deeper? and at "ore $eve$s.

29

< eep %ou r entire bod% energi5ed. BThe Taois ts be$ieve that retaining %o ur se"en is high$% nourishing.C

;u$$% satisf% %our partnerAs unfu$fi$$ed se7ua$ desires. 2atisf% "u$tip$e partners one after the other (ithout a break. Pro"ote hea$th? vigor? and "enta$ c$arit% b% retaining %our energ%. , a v e b i g g e r s t r o n g e r $ o n g e r 9 $ a s t i n g o r g a s "s ( h e n %o u f i n a $ $ % c h o o s e t o cu".

.o(G Dust going over the $ist re"inds "e of the three "ain princip$es of 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution success: practice? practice? practice.

2.-. The .lti"ate (pproach


T h e a p p r o a c h t o $ e a r n i n g t h e 1 $ t i "a t e E c s t a t i c 2 o $ u t i o n i s c a $ $ e d 6 + * P E 6 (hich stands for... 6e$a7? +(areness? *easure? Pace %ourse$f? Energ% circu$ation? and 6ide the (ave.

> e t " e i n t r o d u c e %o u t o t h e i " p o r t a n t a s p e c t s o f e a c h s o %o u A $ $ k n o ( ( h a t %ouA$$ be practicing beginning in the ne7t chapter. ( 5 (ela+ = ou re "e"ber ( hat nor"a $$ % happens to our bodies (hen ( e cu "- .e tens e a n d c o n t r a c t o u r p e $ v i c "u s c $ e s ? e s p e c i a $ $ % a r o u n d t h e b u t t ? a n u s ? s t o "a c h ? and $egs. .hat do %ou think (ou$d happen if %our "usc$es sta%ed co"p$ete$% f$accid Bsorr%? thatAs a scar% (ord for gu%sC (hen %ou (ere high$% e7cited- =ou probab$% (ou$dnAt cu". This is the si"p$est techniEue and the hardest to

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$earn. +fter si7 %ears of practice? IAve fina$$% gotten prett% good at it. 2o"eti"es a$$ I need to do to avoid cu"ing is sta% sti$$ inside and out. 2o a funda"enta$ feature of the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution is re$a7ing. .h%Because ca$" and re$a7ed is the idea$ state for $ove"aking. Tension b$ocks %our b$ood f$o( and %our fee$ings? not to "ention the f$o( of orgas"ic energ%. .hen %our channe$s are b$ocked? %our energ% co$$ects in %our genita$s. +s it bui$ds up (ith no(here e$se to go? %ou fee$ "ore and "ore pressure to ej ac u$ at e . T he en er g % s e eks t he p at h o f $e as t r es is ta nc e? o ut th e t ip o f %o u r vaj ra. .hen %o u re$a7 ins tead? open %o ur inner channe$s ? and $et the energ% "ove up %o ur inner f$ute? %ou can "ore eas i$ % rep$ace the rus h to c$i "a7 ( ith the desire to savor the sensations in ever% "o"ent. T a n t r i c $ o v e "a k i n g i s o n a v e r a g e "u c h s $ o( e r t h a n t h e f a s t p u "p i n g %o u s e e in porno f$icks. Dust b% going s$o(er %ouA$$ be "ore re$a7ed. ,o( do %ou $earn to re$a7 (hi$e e7cited- ;irst? b% doing (hatever %ou can to e$i"inate tension during se7ua$ encounters. 2o "uch tension co"es fro" perfor"ance an7iet% or s e$f9doubt. If %ou can get out of %ou r head Bthe big one IA " ta$king about hereC? %ou can re$a7 "uch easier. Often this reEuires the co""unication and partnering (ith %our $over that (eA$$ ta$k about $ater. B ei ng i n %o u r he ad "e an s h av in g e7 pe ct at i on s a bo ut ( ha tA s g oi ng to h ap pe n and ho( %ou ( ant to perfor". T, I/ < I/ 3 s e7 is a$( a%s $es s fu$fi$$ing than ; EE>I/3 se7. 3etting out of %our head "eans $etting go of so "an % of the (orries that nor"a$$% acco"pan% se7? even (ith $ong ti"e partners. It "eans f o c u s i n g o n n o ( i n s t e a d o f t h e s $ i d e 9 s h o ( o f p i c t u r e s f $ a s h i n g i n s i d e %o u r brain. +nd it "eans dropping goa$s. If %ou p$an to "ake %our s(eetie cu" big t i " e ? o r $ a s t t ( o h o u r s i n s t e a d o f %o u r r e c o r d o f o n e h o u r ? o r b e t ( i c e a s t ur ne d on as $a s t t i "e? t he n %o uA r e s e tt in g u p "en t a $ go a$ s . * a %b e t hi s ( or ks (e$$ for %ou in business. But (hen it co"es to "anaging energ% inside? it can (ork against %ou b% taking %our a(areness out of the "o"ent.. 6e"e"ber? "% be$oved +nastas teaches that energ% f$o(s (here attention goes. 2 o if %ou have an% of these goa$s in %our "ind? %ouA$$ be co"paring %our perfor"ance against that picture %ou created in %our head. This is the e7act anato"% of tension. The 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution? contradictor% as it

31

sounds? is based on $etting go of the need to contro$ the outco"e of %our $ o v e " a k i n g . = o u r a i " i n s t e a d i s t o r e $ a 7 a n d e n j o %. O n c e %o u $ e a r n h o ( t o sta% $oose? deep$% co"fortab$e? and drift (ith the natura$ f$o( of juic% energ%? %ouA$$ soar (ith p$easure instead of $osing it. ,o( can %ou $earn to re$a7- In the A2o$o E7ercisesA chapter (hich fo$$o(s? IA$$ s h o( %o u p h %s ic a $ te ch ni Eu es t ha t as s i s t %o u r "e n t a$ r e$ a7 at i on . = ouA $$ $e ar n ho( to sEuee5e %our "usc$es to re$a7 the"? especia$$% %our se7ua$ "usc$es. IA$$ re"ind %ou to keep %ou r tongue on the roof of %ou r "outh s o %o u donA t tens e up one of the "ost i"portant parts of %our bod%? %our ja(. ;ore"ost a"ongst these re$a7ation techniEues is breathing. 6e"e"ber (hat h a p p e n s t o %o u r b r e a t h ( h e n %o u c u " - = o u s t a r t b r e a t h i n g r a p i d $ % a n d panting. .hat do %ou think (ou$d happen if %ou kne( ho( to breathe deep$% and s$o($% even (hi$e being s( a"ped ( ith ecs tatic fee$ings- = ou got it? %ou (ou$d be (ashed inside and out (ith orgas"ic energ% (ithout re$easing %our precious $itt$e s(i""ers. . es te rn er s br ea th e s ha $$ o( $ % an d u nc on s c io us $ %. Co nt ra s t t ha t ( it h = og a "as ters. 2 o"e are so a( are that the% can shut their breathing do( n to a$"os t nothing and sta% in a state of suspended ani"ation for e7tended periods. 4 onA t get "e ( rong? IA " not tr %i ng to convert %o u into an% s piritua$ practice o t h e r t h a n s e 7 a s " e d i t a t i o n . B u t d o %o u g e t t h a t t h e 1 $ t i " a t e E c s t a t i c 2o$ution is "ore $ike f$oating (ith the current than fighting %our (a% upstrea"6e$a7? and %our se7ua$ energ% (i$$ set %ou free. =ou can Euote "e on that. A 5 A/areness If %ouAre thinking about "aking %our partner cu" and ho$ding back %our o(n ej acu$ation? %o ur a( arenes s ( i$$ be cons u"ed ( ith orgas "s . The 1 $ti"ate Ecs tati c 2o$ution he$ps %o u generate incredib$e "utu a$ orgas "s ? but ( ithout d ir ec t$ % ta rg et in g th e ". + s re $a te d e ar $i er ? %o u r fo cu s n ee ds to b e on p$ ea s u re in the "o"ent. If %ou can appreciate ho( great %our vajra fee$s no(? %ouA$$ be "ore (i$$ing and ab$e to re$a7 and go s$o(.

32

.hen Deffre and I are "aking $ove? (e stop ever% fe( strokes and just fee$ ho( good it is . 2 ee"s $ike ( e do this over and over for hours. If (e (ere pushing f or he r to ha ve t he B ig O ? it in s t ea d "ak es "e ha ve a $i tt $ e s Eu ir t a nd vaj ra goes into forced retire"ent. To beco"e p$easure9centered? %ou need to heighten %our sensate focus. That " e a n s t u n i n g i n t o a $ $ %o u r s e n s e s : t a s t e ? t o u c h ? s i g h t ? s o u n d ? a n d s " e $ $ . I t "eans de$ighting in ever% sight? basking in ever% fragrance? and savoring ever% s e n s a t i o n . I f %o u b e c o " e " o r e s e n s i t i v e t o e v e r %t h i n g t h a t A s h a p p e n i n g a $ $ around and a$$ over %our bod%? %ou (onAt have the co""on situation of untrained $overs: tota$ focus on the genita$s. Instead %ou can distribute that de$icious energ% to a$$ %our chakras. +s (e just discussed? re$a7ation he$ps %ou to a(aken %our senses and e"brace the s ens ations in ever% "o"ent. If %ou havenAt $earned to go ( ith the f$o( and be in the "o"ent (ithout goa$s or e7pectations? "enta$ tension (i$$ shift %our attention a(a% fro" the fee$ings of the "o"ent. The e7ercises of the ne7t chapter "a % not s tart ver% s e7ua$$%? but I hope %ou can see ho( es s entia$ the % are to %our success. *ore i"portant$%? though? "ost of us (ho cu" too Euick$% arenAt rea$ great at recogni5ing the interna$ signa$s that cou$d (arn of us i"pending ejacu$ation. If %ou $earn to register ever% $itt$e nuance of ever% $itt$e fee$ing? going s$o($% and digesting a$$ their energ%? then %ouAre $ess $ike$% to trip over the point of no return. .hen %ouAre enjo%ing ever% breath? sound? and "ove"ent? %ouA$$ be supre"e$% conscious of %our o(n $eve$ of e7cite"ent. +nd %ouA$$ be ab$e to respond to that e7cite"ent before it beco"es too hard to "anage? pushing %ou over the c$iff into a sEuirting p$unge do(n the chas". , o( can %ou "anag e %ou r energ % f$o(s if %o uA re not co"p$ ete $ % tuned in to t h e " - = o u c a n A t . * a k e i t %o u r " i s s i o n t o f o c u s o n %o u r f e e $ i n g s . B e i n g present to the "o"ent is one of the four vita$ cornerstones of Tantric energ% "as t er % and it direct$ % i"pac ts %o ur abi$it % to re$a7. 2 o heighten %ou r s ens es ? fee$ %o ur fee$ings ? enj o % %o ur p$eas ure ( ith no agenda? and %o uA $ $ gradua$$ % $earn to sta% out of %our head and into %our bod%.

33

B % the ( a%? due to tens ion and s ocia$ pres s ure? "an % of us find ours e$ves part%ing (ith recreationa$ drugs and a$coho$. +gain I donAt intend to "ora$i5e? $etAs just be prag"atic. +$though so"e be$ieve that drugs and a$coho$ can s$o( %o u r ej a c u $ a t o r % r e s p o n s e ? t h e %A $ $ a $ s o k e e p %o u f r o " d e v e $ o p i n g t h e b o d % a(areness that (i$$ a$$o( %ou to change %our $ove"aking sta"ina per"anent$%. 3etting high "a% fee$ good te"porari$%? but it "akes it "uch harder to "aster ej acu$ator % ti"ing. Thinking about other things 9 $ike footba$$ or %our $atest (eekend project 9 can be counterproductive too? for the sa"e reason. *ore a(areness is the prescription for "ore "anageab$e p$easure? not $ess. M 5 Measure "our 6evel Of Arousal B % no( %ouA ve heard again and again %ou have to tune in to %our s ens es and sensations. 2o (hat do %ou do (ith this sharpened a(areness- The * in 6 + *P E6 "eans to "onitor and "eas ure %o ur $eve$ of arous a$. This is not jus t a s c i e n t i f i c e 7 p e r i "e n t ? b u t a "e t h o d o f "a k i n g %o u "o r e s e n s i t i v e t o ( h a t " a k e s %o u e 7 c i t e d . I f %o u k n o ( ( h e r e %o u r e 7 c i t e " e n t $ e v e $ i s a n d ( h a t causes it? then %ou can p$a% spontaneous$% (hi$e stretching out %our enjo%"ent and %our partnersA. Then %ou can take responsibi$it% for %our o(n p$eas ure? guiding %o ur $ove"ak ing s o that %o u get rea$$ % turned on and s ta % there (ithout going too far a$$ of a sudden. + rous a$ a( arenes s is co"p $e7 ( ith $ots of s ubt$et %. ItA s "ore $ike a rainbo( than b$ack and (hite. The forces that turn us on arenAt a$(a%s obvious in the "o "e n t? an d ch an ge f ro " ti "e to t i "e. 2 o th e * s te p is a $$ a bo ut $e ar ni ng to read %ourse$f so %ou can kno( (here %ouAre at no( precise$%. * a n % s e 7 t h e r a p i s t s r e c o " " e n d u s i n g a 1 ) 9 p o i n t s c a $ e f o r " o n i t o r i n g %o u r $ e v e $ o f a r o u s a $ d u r i n g p r a c t i c e a n d s e 7 p $ a %. T h i s i s o n e o f t h e " a i n t h i n g s (eA$$ be focusing on in the co"ing e7ercises. BB% the (a%? $eve$ of arousa$ "a% not correspond to the strength of %our erection at an% given "o"ent. ,ave %ou ever cu" (hi$e soft- I have.C ,ereAs "% version of the sca$e... ) P no arousa$ 1 P t(inge at base of penis

34

2 P occasiona$ $itt$e surges of p$easure ! P starting to fee$ good ' P stead% hu" $o( $eve$ arousa$ P fee$ing rea$$% good? "etabo$is" increases 0 P rea$$% into it? donAt (ant to stop 8 P continuous rush of p$easure? fast breathing & P bu55ing inside? face f$ushed? heart pounding : P intense p$easure? outside (or$d is far a(a% :.: P point of no return? e"ission phase begins 1) P ejacu$ation Be7pu$sion phaseC + s %o u p r a c t i c e ? %o u A $ $ $ e a r n t o " e a s u r e %o u r $ e v e $ o f a r o u s a $ a s i t c $ i " b s to(ards :.:? the point of no return. =ou kno( the fee$ing of ti"e stopping? $ike the "ovie c$ip that sudden$% goes into s$o( "otion as %ou (atch the car careen over the c$iff- =ouAve been enjo%ing %ourse$f i""ense$% and "a%be even fee$ing far fro" sEuirting (hen a$$ of a sudden %ou fee$ those invo$untar% contractions a r o u n d % o u r p r o s t a t e a n d %o u k n o ( % o u A r e g o n n a c u " . T h a t A s t h e o f t e n uninvited guest? :.:? budd%. + "ajor part of se$f9"onitoring during %our individua$ practices (i$$ be $earning ho( c$ose %ou can go to :.: (ithout sEuirting. This is a tough thing to accept? gu%s? but %ouAre going to have to p$a% (ith %ourse$f over and over again as %ou $ ea rn th is s %s te ". Bu ""e rG B % t he ( a %? us ev o$ ve d T an tr ik as do nA t r ef er t o such divine p$a% as "asturbation? (hich has hidden and dirt% connotations. .e ca$$ it se$f9p$easuring? (hich is a (onderfu$ and sacred thing. If %ou donAt a$read%? %ouAre going to have to $earn to enjo% giving %ourse$f p$easure. 2orr%? doctorAs orders. ) 5 )ace "ourself O<? %ouAve re$a7ed. =ouAve beco"e "ore sensitive. =ouAve "easured ho( good it fee$s. .i$$ thes e change %our s ta"ina dra"atica$$ %- .e$$? "a%be. But rea$$% the 6 + * part of 6+ * P E6 is s i"p$ % vita$ preparation for the P s tep. P s tands for pacing %ourse$f.

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/o? I take that back. P s tands for P $eas ure. If %o ur focus is on p$eas ure not orgas "? then %o u (onA t be rus hing head$ong to( ards a des tinat ion. = ou (onA t be in a race to(ards the finish $ine. =ou (onAt have a schedu$e to "eet. =ouA$$ just s$o( do(n and enjo%. ThatAs a big part of pacing. +nd if %ou $earn ho( to "ake the p$eas ure %ou enj o% greater than an% Euick dribb$e %ouA ve ever e7perienced? %ouA$$ (ant to pace %ourse$f for "ore? *ore? and *O6EG .eA$$ ta$k $ater about partners (ho get so e7cited that the% donAt $et %ou pace %o urs e $f. 2ure? that happens and in their rus h to orgas " the%A $ $ drag %ou over the precipice. +nd if %ou both cu" together $ike Deffre and I do s o"eti"es ? (onderfu$G But (hen pus h co"es to shove? (hat "ost $overs rea$$% (ant is for %ou to go a$$ night. 2o eventua$$%? (ith the right kind of guidance? the%A$$ $isten to reason. IA$$ sho( %ou $ater ho( to so$icit their ecstatic participation. The 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution is a$$ about $earning to ride the edge? that fine $i ne b et ( e en ab s o rb in g a $$ t he p$ ea s u re %o u ca n t ak e? a nd ta ki ng to o "uc h a $$ at once and cu"ing. >ike I "entioned before? %ouA$$ rare$% hear "e ta$k about contro$ for this reas on. Contro$ "akes %ou tight? tens e? and rigid? the oppos ite of re$a7ation. Contro$ reEuires %ou to set standards and (atch %ourse$f a$$ the ti"e? s topping the f$o( of %ou r energ% to pu$$ %o urs e $f back fro" the brink. 6iding the edge is re$a7ed? "ore $ike skipping fro" (ave top to (ave top than fighting the surf (ith strong steering "otions and $ots of big thrott$e adj us t"ents . .hen %ou ride the ( ave? %o u re$a7? s avor the s ( eet s ens ations ? and gradua$$% and gent$% add $itt$e bits of arousa$ as %ou can take it. The ke% to FP P Pace =ourse$fF is t(o "ore P (ords? peaking and p$ateauing. Peaking is... +djusting the sti"u$i that give %ou sudden surges of arousa$ so %ou co"e back do(n (ithout going over the top. I f %o u g r a p h e d p e a k i n g i t ( o u $ d $ o o k $ i k e a s t e e p a s c e n t a n d t h e n a s t e e p descent. .hich is (here it got its na"e. P $ateauing is the advanced s ki$$ that %ou $earn once %o u get good at peaking. P$ateauing "eans...

36

>earning to "aintain a high $eve$ of arousa$ (ithout backing off. /o( %ou see (hat re$a7ing? a(areness? and "easuring (i$$ do for %ou- The%Are the essentia$ too$s %ou use to recogni5e (hen %ouAre reaching a peak thatAs too c$ose to the point of no return. This heightened sensitivit% in that "o"ent $ets %ou s top s oon enough. .hen %ou "as ter getting c$os e to :.: and backing off? t h e n %o u A $ $ $ e a r n e v e n s u b t $ e r a d j u s t " e n t s s o c a n e n j o % p $ a t e a u s f o r $ o n g periods of ti"e. 2o"e ca$$ these Fva$$e% orgas"sF because their arousa$ curve f$attens out instead of peaking up sharp$%. Oh %eah? thereAs an i"portant section in this book ca$$ed FInterrupting Ej acu$ationF ( hich as s is ts %ou ( ith $earning to peak. It ( i$$ s ho( %o u "ore t h a n h a $ f 9 a 9 d o 5 e n p h %s i c a $ t e c h n i E u e s t o s t o p s E u i r t i n g ( h e n %o u s t r a % t o o c $ o s e t o : . : . ; r a n k $ %? t h e s e a r e n A t " % f a v o r i t e t e c h n i E u e s f o r t ( o r e a s o n s . ;irst? stopping so"ething fro" happening isnAt rea$$% Tantric? (hich preaches going (ith the f$o(. 2 econd? I have to ad"it that IA" not too good at the". *a%be the%A $$ he$p %ou a $ot so IAve inc$uded the (ho$e stor%. But for "e? the 1 $ti "at e Ecs tatic 2 o$ution is "ore about energ% circu$a tion than interrupting the e"ission phase. E 5 Energy Circulation E s t a n d s f o r e n e r g % a n d c i r c u $ a t i n g i t a ( a % f r o " %o u r g e n i t a $ s . B u t i t c o u $ d a $ s o s t a n d f o r E c s t a s %. I n f a c t ? % o u " i g h t c o n s i d e r t h e 1 $ t i " a t e E c s t a t i c 2o$ution teaching about 2.E.J. (hich is rea$$% 2ubt$e Energ% eJstac%. B ecaus e "os t of us are progra ""ed to rus h to( ards the Big O ? ( e co"e into the arena of $ove p$a% freEuent$% te"pted to re$ease our se7ua$ energ% through e7p$osive genita$ orgas"s. ItAs (hat books? f$icks? and $ocker roo" ta$k g$orifies. ThatAs the accepted concept of good se7 in "ost peop$eAs "inds. .ho a"ong us has been fortunate enough to be initiated reverent$% and open$% into the higher di"ensions of sacred se7- ;e(? if an%. 2o hereAs a vita$ part of %our initiation? %ou $uck% stiff. Instead of shooting for the Big O? as %our arousa$ bui$ds? spread %our energ% up? around? and

37

throughout %our bod%? a$$o(ing it to carr% %ou to higher and higher $eve$s of p$easure. 2o"e sa% it (i$$ fue$ %our brain (ith cos"ic energ% and give %ou p s %c h e d e $ i c v i s i o n s . . h a t e v e r . / o t o n $ % ( i $ $ i t f e e $ e c s t a t i c ? b u t s i n c e %o u (onAt be dep$eting %our energ%? %ouA$$ be ab$e to $ast and $ast and $ast. ,o( do %ou do it- 2i"p$% e7p$ained? %ou channe$ %our se7ua$ energ% up %our i nn er f$ ut e fr o" %o u r f ir s t c ha kr a Bt he s e 7 ce nt er a t t he ba s e of t he s pi ne C s o %our $itt$e head doesnAt e7p$ode in a gush of ejacu$ation. =ou redirect %our orgas "i c energ % pri"ari $ % b % us ing the four corners tones ? pres ence? breath? sound? and "ove"ent. +d"itted$%? $earning it "a% not be as si"p$e as des cribing it. It took "e "onths ? thatA s for sure. ThatA s a big reas on ( h % there are so "an% e7ercises is this book. ; or so"e it co"es natura$$%. * % dear friend? 6ick? for e7a"p$e? kne( ho( to run energ% instinctive$% as a teenager. Of course? ever%one? his big brother p ar a "o un t a "on g t he "? to $d h i" he ( as ( ei rd . 2 o i ns te ad of a ct in g F cr a5 %? F he suppress ed his natura$ abi$it% for %ears . ;ortunate$ % toda% heAs using his natura$ ta$ent and is one of the bes t and $onges t $as ting $overs IA ve ever "et. B,e asked "e to put his phone nu"ber here (ith the "essage F;or a good ti"e ca$$ 6ick...F but I didnAt think %ou gu%s (ou$d be interested.C O nce %o u $earn to circu$ate B"ove? run? channe$C energ %? %ou e7perience a"a5ing$% po(erfu$ sensations. I"agine (hat it fee$s $ike (hen that e7citation "ak i ng vaj ra pu $s e an d t hr ob i nf us es o th er pa rt s o f %o u r b od %. T ha t re "i nd s "e of the first ti"e I e7perienced "oving energ% out of "% genita$s (ithout e7p$oding. I (as in one of *argotAs sacred se7ua$it% (orkshops practicing se$f9 p$easuring. 4oes that picture see" a $itt$e (eird to %ou? a bunch of "en and ( o"en doing the"s e $ves - * a %b e s o? but thatA s (hat ( e ( ere a$$ doing. O f cours e? our ai " ( as nA t to shoot our ( ad. O n the contrar %? it ( as to run that energ% up our inner f$utes. IA d never fe$t orgas "ic energ % an %( here e$s e before. 2 udden$%? I ( as hot and ting$% a$$ over. *% feet fe$t $ike throbbing vajras. *% head (as on fire. *% b o d % ( a s u n d u $ a t i n g a n d j a c k k n i f i n g ? s h a k i n g ( i $ d $ %. I " u s t h a v e b e e n s crea"ing becaus e "% throat ( as s ore after(ards. Bo% oh bo%? I didnA t (ant it to end. It (as just $ike that intense spas" of p$easure during ejacu$ation. But

38

I ( asnAt cu"ing (et$% ( hi$e the surge of ecstas % p$a%ed on and on. + fter an hour (hen the practice session (as over? I (anted to keep going. I cou$d have circu$ated that juic% fee$ing throughout "% bod% indefinite$%? or at $east unti$ I co$$apsed fro" e7haustion. ThatA s probab$ % ( hen I got the idea to ( rite this book. Becaus e if I cou$d e7perience that? so cou$d an%one. 2 o ? t h e E o f 6 + * P E 6 i s t o c h a n n e $ %o u r o r g a s "i c e n e r g % e $ s e ( h e r e i n %o u r bod%. .here does it go and (hat does it do- .e$$? first off? it "oves to %our heart and energi5es %our $ove center. =ou kno( ho( (o"en are a$(a%s sEua(king about finding a sensitive gu%- The%A$$ $ove %ou (hen %our heart is activated b% se7ua$ energ%. +nd ( hen one of %our chakras is rea$$ % turned on? %ou can f$ood %our partnerAs eEuiva$ent chakra (ith %our energ%. Circu$ating energ% then beco"es a sharing e7ercise as (e$$ as an interna$ one. *% be$oved friend 4oc 2teven is the "aster of this. I asked hi" once? after observing his $ove e7p$oits for over a %ear? (hen (as the $ast ti"e he ca"e. ,e thought for a (hi$e and said he thought it ( as three %e ars ago. , o( do %o u do i t- I a s k ed . , is a ns ( e r F I $ ov e ( o "e n s o "uc h? t ha t i tA s t ot a$ $ % n at ur a$ f or "e t o "ov e t ho s e s e7 ua $ j u ic es to "% he ar t? an d t he n I $ ov e t he " "o re . + n d th e % go (i$d for a co"passionate? caring sensitive $over (ho on$% (ants the" to fee$ ecstas% above a$$ e$se.F .eA ve ta$ked about the four orgas "ic ke%s 9 pres ence? breath? s ound? and "ove"ent 9 to a"p$if% %our energ% and fee$ "ore passion. These are the pri"ar % too$s of running energ% 9 vis ua$i5ing that juice s preading ins ide? breathing deep in the be$$%? "oaning (ith p$easure? rocking %our hips? and s E u e e 5 i n g %o u r s e 7 u a $ " u s c $ e s 9 ( h i c h p u " p s e n e r g % u p %o u r i n n e r f $ u t e . + fter $ots of practic e? IA ve rea$$ % proven to "%s e $f that uttering $ove sounds re$eases energ% that (ou$d other(ise just sett$e in "% genita$s. If %ouAre the "a cho s i$ent t %p e? it "a % take so"e getting us ed to. But itA s ( e$$ ( orth it. Be$ieve "e? %our partners (i$$ $ove to hear ho( turned on %ou are. +s discussed previous$%? the net i"pact of running energ% is $earning to separate ejacu$ation fro" orgas". .hen %ouAre re$a7ed inside and super

39

turned on? the contract ions around %ou r pros tate that initiat e the e"is s ion of s e"en donA t have to be activated. .hen the energ% beco "es intens e? %o u can s t i $ $ h a v e t h o s e p o( e r f u $ p e $ v i c "u s c $ e c o n t r a c t i o n s t h a t f e e $ s o ( o n d e r f u $ . ThatA s ( hat caus es a dr % orgas "? a $ong s eries of s $o( p$eas urab$e s pas "s (ithout ejacu$ating and (ith a rush of energ%. I ca$$ these Fi"p$osive orgas"sF becaus e the energ% gets pu"ped back ins ide and can circu$ate over and over again. The best ne(s of a$$- .hen I have a dr% i"p$osive orgas"? a$$ of a sudden "% a r o u s a $ d e c r e a s e s d r a " a t i c a $ $ %. O n t h e o t h e r s i d e o f t h a t p e a k ? I A " s u d d e n $ % $ess sensitive. 2o I can stroke faster and $et "% e7cite"ent bui$d s$o($%. B% circu$a ting "% energ% (hi$e IA " peaking? "% c$os enes s to :.: co"es and goes . If I p$a% it right? it "akes "% $ove sta"ina virtua$$% un$i"ited. ( 5 (ide The Orgasmic 'ave .hen %ou retain %our energ% inside? %our p$easure rises to higher and higher $ e v e $ s . T h a t A s ( h % t h e a c r o n %" 6 + * P E 6 i s s o a p t ? d e s c r i b i n g h o ( %o u r p $ e a s u r e r a "p s u p . T h o s e o f u s ( h o c u " E u i c k $ % n e v e r e 7 p e r i e n c e t h e s e esca$ating p$ateaus. .e never deve$op our capacit% to absorb "ore and "ore p$easure. .hen (e fina$$% do? it fee$s $ike ecstatic (aves surging inside. .hat (as a : on the arousa$ sca$e ha$f9an9hour ago no( beco"es so "uch "ore. ThatAs (hat 6 is about. ,ereAs (hat "% be$oved (ife? Deffre? sa%s about se7... '(traight pumping is boring and ma)es me numb. I really love to go slow, li)e pum p, pum p, pum p, and r elax. I us t let the ener gy was h over me. %hen a few more stro)es and the orgasmic waves, little implosive orgasms, roll through me. *y doing this over and over again and again, I eventually get to higher and higher plateaus.' =ou see ho( the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution is ecstatic (hen a$$ the pieces co"e t o g e t h e r - = o u r e $ a 7 a n d h e i g h t e n %o u r a ( a r e n e s s o f %o u r s e n s e s t o o p e n %ourse$f to subt$e energ%. B% "easuring %our arousa$? %ou $earn to pace? peak? and p$ateau. This bui$ds up intense energ% (hich %ou circu$ate around %our

40

bod% instead of e7p$oding in a Euick ejacu$ation. Then the (ave takes %ou? and %ou just f$oat. .hen %our energ% rises to %our spiritua$ centers? the higher chakras? %ouA$$ find a n a t u r a $ c a $ " i n g a n d b $ i s s f u $ f e e $ i n g e n g u $ f %o u . I t A s a s i f %o u r o r g a s " i c e n e r g % i s f u e $ i n g %o u r s o u $ A s p s %c h i c n a t u r e . T h i s i s ( h % ( e c a $ $ T a n t r i c $ o v e "a k i n g s e 7 u a $ " e d i t a t i o n . 2 o "e d e s c r i b e t h i s a s f e e $ i n g $ i k e a h o $ $ o ( ba"boo ( ith a never9ending supp$% of energ% running bet(een the earth to the sk% through %our bod%. Tantric $ove "aking us es the s a"e bod % parts and erogenous 5ones %o u s ee in J9rated f$icks. But the actions inside and out are vast$% different. Tantric $ove"aking? being eEua$$% spiritua$ as ph%sica$? is s$o( and conscious. ItAs not f oc us ed on or ga s "? bu t on bu i$ di ng p$ ea s u re a nd "ak in g it $a s t f or ev er . Th is takes har"on%? openness? and $ots of co""unication bet(een partners. + s %ou p$a% "ore and "ore ( ith the sa"e partner? %o uA $ $ undoubted$ % $earn " o v e s t h a t p $ e a s e t h e " a n d c u e s t h a t t i p %o u ( h e n t o u s e t h e ". . h e n %o u "editate se7ua$$% together? %ou "us t each be tota$$% centered and respons ib$e f o r %o u r o ( n p e r s o n a $ e 7 p e r i e n c e . > o v e r s ( a n t d i f f e r e n t t h i n g s a t d i f f e r e n t ti"es. Even the "ost ski$$ed $overs canAt a$(a%s predict the (hi"s and c ha ng es e ru pt in g i n s po nt an eo us $ ov e p$ a %. 2 o bo th pa rt ne rs "us t be tu ne d i n t o t h e "s e $ v e s a s ( e $ $ a s t o e a c h o t h e r . T h i s o n $ % ( o r k s ( h e n %o u ( e $ c o "e guidance fro" %o ur $over? ( hether verba$ or subt$e. Tantric $ove partners are tru$% a tea"? tota$$% in s%nc (ith each other. If %ouAre sing$e and tr%ing to attract a partner? or have one (hoAs into a tota$$% different e7perience? riding the kind of orgas"ic (ave IAve just described "a% conjure up prob$e"s. IA" good at orgas"ic "aster%? but (hen IA" (ith a p u "p ? p u "p ? p u "p ( i $ d p a r t n e r ( h o i s n A t i n s %n c ( i t h "e ? I A $ $ c u " E u i c k $ % too. There are different st%$es of $overs and (eAre not a$$ co"patib$e (ith each other. >ater IA$$ sho( %ou ho( to "otivate? encourage? guide? and coach p o t e n t i a $ o r c u r r e n t s e 7 p a r t n e r s s o %o u c a n b u i $ d a T a n t r i c $ o v e t e a " . B u t this "a% not be (hat so"e $overs (ant and %ou "a% have to si"p$% accept that the%Are not for %ou.

41

Chapter !: /olo Prep


6ead% to practice- I bet. Enough ta$k a$read%? $etAs get do(n to business. Chapter ! is the first of t(o that present so$o e7ercises. =ou kno(? ones %ou do b % %o u r s e $ f ev en i f %o u ha ve a $ ov e pa rt ne r. Th is ch ap te r c on ce nt ra t es on preparing %ourse$f? deve$oping basic sensua$ ski$$s? and bui$ding the foundation %ouA$$ need to beco"e an Orgas" *aster. + fter so"e genera$ guide$ines for practicing and? if %ou have one? guiding %o u t o $ e t %o u r p a r t n e r k n o ( ( h a t A s g o i n g o n ? I ( a n t t o " a k e a f e ( c o " " e n t s about the $east effective "ethods for success? na"e$% desensiti5ing vajraAs E ui ck re s p ons e. Th en IA $ $ s ho( %o u h o( t o pr ac ti c e 6+ * ? th e f ir s t th re e pa rt s of 6+*PE6. .eA$$ start (ith re$a7ing? "ove to (a%s to heighten %our senses Ba( arenes s C? and focus in a big ( a % on $earning to "eas ure %ou r arous a$. Oh %ea h? out of s eEuence IA " gonna thro( in a vita$ e7ercis e to s trengthen %ou r pe$vic "usc$es so %ou can start practicing dai$%. =ou need to start these right a(a% because the strength of these "usc$es (i$$ beco"e a vita$ part of %our "aster%.

!.1 Practice 0uidelines

E+ercise )rogram ; i r s t o f a $ $ ? t h i s i s a n e 7 e r c i s e p r o g r a " . I t A s $ i k e g o i n g t o t h e g %" t o ( o r k various "usc$e groups. Of course? in this case %ouA$$ be deve$oping %our se7ua$ ref$e7es (hich are defined b% 6+* P E6. * % point is that %ou need to p$an for the $ong gradua$ approach as opposed to the one shot dea$. +bove a$$? take %our ti"e. It doesnAt "atter ho( fast %ou (ork through these e7ercis es as $ong as %ou keep at it for an hour or s o ever % da % or t( o? or as c$ose to that as %ou can "anage. To change %our se7ua$ $ife dra"atica$$%?

42

%ouA $$ need to sta% (ith this progra" for severa$ "onths. /o one can guarantee that %ouA$$ change a $ife$ong pattern overnight. If %ou (ent to the g%" to start bui$ding %our upper bod%? (ou$d %ou start (ith the "a7i"u" (eight *r. 1niverse can $ift- 1n$ess %ouAre +rno$d 2 c h ( a r 5 e n e g g e r ? o f c o u r s e n o t . E v e n h e s t a r t e d s $ o ( $ % a n d g r a d u a $ $ %. I f %o u p u s h %o u r s e $ f t o t h e $ i " i t ? %o u c o u $ d s t r a i n %o u r s e $ f r i g h t a t t h e b e g i n n i n g . That kind of short9ter" setback (onAt prevent %ou fro" succeeding a$$ b% itse$f? but %ou cou$d get so de"ora$i5ed that %ouAd Euit. 2o start Tantrica$$%? s$o( and eas%. 2ince (eAre on the subject? (e "odern .esterners are preconditioned to e7pect i ns ta nt g ra ti fi ca t i on . = o u kn o( ( h at I "e a n: FI ( an t i t a nd I ( an t i t n o( .F I canAt b$a"e us for having this "enta$it%? $iving as (e do (ith "odern "edia? techno$og%? and advertising bo"bard"ent. It just doesnAt (ork ver% (e$$ in the T an tr ic be dr oo ". * a %b e th at A s pa rt of t he re as on ( h % t ho s e o f us s ens it iv e sou$s (ho havenAt given and received sufficient se7ua$ p$easure cu" rea$ Euick$%. .e (ant a$$ the p$easure i""ediate$%G Slo/ 7o/n 2o %our first g$oba$ assign"ent is to s$o( do(n. P$ease donAt start out (ith e7pectations for instant resu$ts. =ou "ight have so"e a"a5ing changes Euick$ %. * an % do? but donA t bank on it. E7pecta tions ( i$$ jus t add to %o ur an7iet% $eve$ and decrease the first step of 6+*PE6? na"e$% re$a7. Instead? start s$o($%? fee$ good about doing a $itt$e and then a $itt$e bit "ore? and good things (i$$ happen eventua$$%. ; or the "ost part? these e7ercises bui$d on each other. ThereA s no gospe$ about the perfect order? but IAve arranged the" in a seEuence that "akes sense about (hat to "aster first. The $earning strateg% here is a gradient? deve$oping basic ski$$s first and bui$ding "ore and "ore co"p$e7 actions on top of the" ( ith s "a$$ steps. ;or e7a"p$e? %ou need to re$a7 before practicing peaking becaus e if %ou donAt re$a7 at just the right "o"ent %ouA$$ b$o( right past the point of no return.

43

*an% of these practices %ouA$$ (ant to do over and over to sta% in shape. ;ro" others? %ouA$$ get a kind of breakthrough (hich %ouA$$ incorporate into %our $ife as a natura$ part of %o ur s ens uous p$a %. 2 o %ou r e7ercis e progra" ( i$$ go through phases (hich IA$$ e7p$ain as (e progress. Tantric A,,roach 4o %ou understand that %ou need to begin this progra" (ith a Tantric approach- That "eans re$a7ing into the "o"en t and fu$$ % appreciating ever % $itt$ e ne( thing %ou $earn and tr%. /ot pus hing %o urs e$f? not forcing progres s ? not beating %ourse$f up if things donAt go according to so"e schedu$e %ou "ake u p i n %o u r he ad . It "a % s o un d $ ik e a co "p $ e t e pa ra do 7? b ut be $i ev e "e : t o go as fas t as poss ib$e? drop a$$ thos e goa$s about ( here %o uA re going. D us t take it step b% step? O<+nd %ou need to a$$o( roo" for error. If %ou create a p$an and define stringent perfor"ance standards? %ouA$$ put pressure on %ourse$f to perfor". .e a$read% covered ho( "uch that can contribute to invo$untar% ejacu$ation. 2o drop those "enta$ pictures too? O<T o c r e a t e t h e r i g h t k i n d o f p r a c t i c e s e t t i n g ? %o u A $ $ ( a n t a s t r e s s 9 f r e e environ"ent (ith privac% and (ithout fear of being interrupted. ; ind or create a c$ean? co"fortab$e roo" (here %ou fee$ re$a7ed. + roo" (ith a "usic s%ste" or (here %ou can $ug a boo"bo7 (i$$ he$p? as the right kind of "ood "usic can enhance %our e7perience. ; or e7a"p$e? us e "editative "usic for the re$a7ing and a(areness e7ercises at 6+* Bre$a7? a(areness? "easureC? and "ore rh%th"ic sounds for the sensua$ e7ercises at PE6 Bpace? energ%? ride the (aveC. Chapter & and the resources section of our (ebsite have so"e e7a"p$es of our favorite "usic. =ou "a% need to b$ock so"e ti"e ever% da% or t(o fro" %our (eek$% schedu$e so %ou re"e"ber to practice often and "aintain %our focus. If %ou canAt "ake t hi s ap po in t "en t ( i th %o u r s e $ f ev er % ti "e %o uA v e s c he du $e d it ? d onA t s ( e at i t. Dust "ake sure %ou practice severa$ ti"es a (eek. + ha$f9an9hour a (eek isnAt enough. +nd b% the (a%? tr% not to sEuee5e a fe( "inutes in bet(een pressing

44

dead$ines (hi$e %ouAre on the run. the better? O<-

Th e $ es s ti "e c ru nc h a nd "e n ta $ pr es s ur e

B as ica$$ %? j us t have fun and enj o % %o urs e$f. 4 onA t turn a progra" of s e7ua$ ecs tas %9 bui$ding into arduous ( ork. , eck? in a fe( pages IA " going to as k %ou to p$easure %our vajra. =ou (ant that to beco"e a chore- I hope not. To Cum Or 2ot To Cum =es? our goa$ is for %ou to "aster orgas"s and separate the" fro" ejacu$ating. B u t t h i s ( h o $ e p u r s u i t i s a b o u t p $ e a s u r e a n d e n j o %" e n t . T h e e n d s d e f i n i t e $ % d o n o t j u s t i f % h a r s h ? u n p $ e a s a n t "e a n s . 2 o a f t e r a s o $ o p r a c t i c e s es s i o n o f s ti"u $at ing %ou rs e$f? %ou "a % ( ant to cu". IA " not going to preach about this in the instructions for ever% e7ercise. Take this guide$ine to heart right no(. =ou "a% have so "uch juice and se7ua$ energ% bui$t up that the e7p$osive r e$ ea s e "a % be j us t ( ha t %o u r bo d % n ee ds . .o nd er fu $G = o u "a % b e s o t ur ne d on that %ou fee$ %ouA ve got to b$o( %o ur ( ad. ; ineG O r %o u "a % enj o% it s o " u c h t h a t %o u f e e $ %o u d e s e r v e a r e ( a r d . 3 r e a t ? g o f o r i t G 2 o " e t i " e s I d o . Dust re"e"ber? $ike "e? to appreciate %our fantastic 3od9given ta$ent for giving %ourse$f p$easure. ItAs a gift. Taoist te7ts e"phasi5e ho( "uch energ% %ou $ose b% re$easing %our seed. The% preach that too often is bad for %ou . The 2 ecrets O f The D ade Bedroo"? ( hich I think is one of their ancient te7ts? reco""ends a hea$th% ejacu$ation freEuenc% for "en of various ages. If %ouAre a hea$th% 1 %ear9o$d? it suggests %o u c a n c u " t ( i c e a d a %. + s %o u a g e ? i f %o u A r e h e a $ t h %? h e r e a r e t h e b o o k A s genera$ guide$ines... .hen =ouAre !) ') ) 0) 8) =ou Can Cu" Once Ever% 1 da% ! da%s da%s 1) da%s !) da%s.

45

The book reco""ends doub$ing that freEuenc% if %ouAre sick? high$% e"otiona$? or under undue s tress . 6egard$ess of (hat %ou choose to do at an% ti"e? $etAs face a botto"9$ine rea$it% r ig ht n o( . = o u . I> > g o o ve r t he t op a cc id en t a $$ % an d cu " "o re t i "es th an %ou intend. +s %ou $earn to dance and f$o( (ith this po(erfu$ force? %ouA$$ s$ip over the point of no return. If %ou donAt? %ouAre not getting c$ose enough. 2o e7pect so"e unintentiona$ sEuirting before %ou "aster pro$onging %our ecstas % as $ong as %ou (ant. .hen %ou do cu" une7pected$%? donAt beat %ourse$f up? enjo% it. ThatAs (hat this (ho$e ga"e of se7 is about? right)artner Briefing If %ou have one pri"ar% $ong9ter" partner or severa$ $overs that %ouAre inti"ate (ith? I strong$% reco""end %ou brief the" on (hat %ouAre doing here. This is part$% because secrec% can create tension that contributes to invo$untar% e7p$os ions of the s e"ina$ variet %. Chapters ! and ' dis cuss so$o p$eas uring because refining %our arousa$ pattern is e7citing enough in private. If so"eone e$se is present? it cou$d be too e7citing at first? or too e"barrassing to re$a7. + t this point? before %o uA ve begun %o ur practice progra"? I donA t s ugges t %ou s a % a ( ho$e $ot. ThatA s ( h% IA ve ca$$ed this a Fbriefing.F If %ouA ve found our (ebsite? together? thatAs idea$. =ouAve started as a partnership and have a $ r e a d % t a $ k e d a b o u t i t . 3 r e a t G = o u A $ $ s t i $ $ ( a n t t o a $ e r t %o u r p a r t n e r t h a t %ouAre starting a series of private e7ercises so the%A $$ understand (hat %ouAre up to (hen %ou disappear ever% da% or so. If %ouAre partner isnAt %et a(are of (hat %ouAre doing? here are so"e suggestions about ho( to approach %our short ta$k... 'I found an interesting website recently about improving our lovema)ing. It's based on %antra, an ancient spiritual practice that uses sexual energy to raise consciousness. 'I want you to )now that I' ll be doing s om e s olo s ens uous exer cis es in private for a few wee)s. %hey're designed to help my personal

46

development. I'll let you )now how it' s progressing and hope to get you involved soon. '+o you want to read about %antra on , www.%antra&t%ahoe.com- so you'll understand more about what I'll be doing!' T h e " o r e f o r t h r i g h t %o u A r e c o " f o r t a b $ e b e i n g ? t h e b e t t e r . I f %o u ( a n t t o b e "ore specific at this stage? %ou can a$so sa%... 'I'm reading .ltimate / aculation 0astery, the .ltimate /cstatic (olution 1or 2remature / aculation. I believe that by using this program I'll be able to really lengthen our lovema)ing. &re you interested in reading the manual that describes what I'll be practicing!' If this is difficu$t for %ou? it (ou$d be a good idea to ta$k to a se7 therapist or c o u n s e $ o r a b o u t c h a n g i n g %o u r r e $ a t i o n s h i p d %n a " i c s . T h e "o r e s u p p o r t %o u get fro" %o ur partner? the fas ter %o ur res u$ts ( i$$ be. If %ouA r e near Tahoe? Deffre and I are "ore than (i$$ing to he$p in person. If %ouAre farther a(a%? (e can he$p (ith phone counse$ing.

!.2 1esensiti2ing
4 es en s i ti 5i ng "e an s u s i ng pr od uc ts o r t ec hn iE ue s t o "a ke v aj ra te "po ra r i $ % $ess sensiti5e. E7perts report $itt$e $ong9ter" progress (ith ejacu$ator% "aster% b% using these "ethods. In fact? the (ho$e idea is repugnant to a Tantric $over ( h o a i "s t o h e i g h t e n s e n s e s ? n o t r e d u c e t h e ". B u t i t A s a n u n d e r s t a n d a b $ e pre"ise that "a% even he$p a given situation in the short ter". )re8Masturbation P r e9 "a s t ur b at i on "e an s h av in g s e 7 a $o ne ab ou t t( o t o fo ur ho urs be fo re t he b i g e v e n t . T h e " e t h o d i s b a s e d o n t h e f a c t t h a t "o s t o f u s a r e $ e s s s e n s i t i 5 e and have $ess des ire after cu"ing. +re %o u- I kno( I a ". + s IA ve a$read % " e n t i o n e d ? i n " % ) s I s o " e t i " e s c a n A t g e t a n d s t a % h a r d f o r h o u r s o r d a %s after ejacu$ating.

47

The prob$e" (ith this techniEue is that oneAs $eve$ of arousa$ is on$% part of ( hat contributes to invo$untar % s Euirting. If %o uA re s ti$$ $ead around b% %o ur $itt$ e head and its h %p noti c urge to cu"? %ou A $$ on$% gain a fe( "inut es . ItAs t r u e ? i t " a % t a k e %o u a b i t $ o n g e r t h e s e c o n d t i " e b e f o r e %o u a p p r o a c h : . : . But if %ouAre not inti"ate$% a(are of %our $eve$ of arousa$ at each "o"ent? %ou "a % have the s a"e troub$e s $ipping over the edge once %o ur arrive. If %ou havenAt "astered peaking just short of the point of no return? %ouAre $ike$% to arrive and depart at the cu"ing s tation Euick$%. If pre9"as turbation doub$es %ou r ti"e of $as ting fro" five "inutes to ten "inutes ? %ou "ight cons ider it progress. But face it? itAs far short of (hat Tantric "aster% (i$$ a$$o( %ou to do. Creams 4 esens iti5ing crea"s are products (hich c$ai" to $ess en the s ens ations fe$t b% "e n d u r i n g i n t e r c o u r s e s o t h a t t h e % c a n $ a s t $ o n g e r . I h a v e n A t t r i e d t h e "? b u t i t " a k e s s e n s e f r o " a p u r e $ % p h %s i c a $ p o i n t o f %o u ? d o e s n A t i t - + s h o t o f /ovocain in the dickhead is enough to scare an%one a(a% fro" cu"ing. But if one of these crea"s (orks on %ou and "akes se7 $ess p$easurab$e b% decreas ing s ti"u $at ion? itA s kind of a s e$f9defeating ( in9$os e victor %. It "ight f e e $ g o o d i n %o u r " i n d i f %o u c a n $ a s t $ o n g e r ? b u t i f i t A s o n $ % f u n f o r %o u r p a r t n e r ? h o( o f t e n ( i $ $ %o u ( a n t t o d o i t- . o u $ d n A t %o u r a t h e r h a v e "o r e intense sensations $asting for hours if %ou cou$d s(ing it- 2ounds $ike a "uch better (in9(in to "e. Condoms If %ouAre carefu$ about safe se7 $ike "ost ever%one I kno(? %ouAre a(are that c o n d o " s d o r e d u c e t h e a " o u n t o f s t i " u $ a t i o n %o u e 7 p e r i e n c e d u r i n g s e 7 . 1sing condo"s to protect against 2T4s and un(anted pregnancies a$read% "ake the" high$% reco""ended. BB% the (a%? thereAs so"e va$uab$e i nf or "a ti on i n Ch ap te r & ab ou t $e s s en in g %o u r ri s k an d "ak i ng s e7 s "ar t. C 2o"e "en find that (earing a condo" he$ps the" $ast $onger b% $o(ering their arousa$. IAve even heard that so"e "en use "ore than one condo" to decrease their sensitivit% even "ore.

48

+gain? it can take %ou $onger to get to the point of no return? (hich is good. B u t ( h en %o u ar ri ve at th e ed ge of t he c$ if f ( i th t ho s e ( on de rf u$ fe e$ in gs s(ir$ing around %ou? ( i$$ %ou be ab$e to hand$e it an% better- I find not. 2o %ouA$$ sti$$ need the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution.

!.! 3ela4ing
=our ejacu$ation "aster% e7ercises begin (ith the 6 of 6+*PE6? for re$a7ing. .eAve a$read% covered (h% this is vita$? because ejacu$ation is often triggered b% tension in the pe$vis? butt? or "ind. Ca$" and re$a7ed is the idea$ state for $ove"aking? so that thereA$$ no tension to prevent the natura$ f$o( of orgas"ic en er g %. .h en %o u re $a 7 a nd a( ak en %o u r s ens es ? ( h ic h ( e A $ $ ( or k o n n e7 t? %o u can "ore eas i$ % rep$ace the rus h to c$i"a7 ( ith the des ire to s avor each sensation in ever% "o"ent. E+ercise* Cor,se )osture ThereAs a =oga position ca$$ed the corpse posture (hich is a good p$ace to start "aking re$a7ation a sensua$ discip$ine. 1C >ie do( n on %our back and c$ose %our e%es . 1s e a pi$$o( under %our knees and neck if needed for co"fort. 1C 2 pread %ou r $egs s $ight$ % and $et %ou r ar "s fa$$ a( a% fro" %ou r bod % ( ith %our pa$"s up. 2C I"agine the (eight of %ou r bod % pres s ing do( n into the earth (hi$e being entire$% supported a$$ around. 2C Dust $et a$$ the tension in %our bod% go co"p$ete$%? a$$o(ing a$$ %our "usc$es to re$a7. >et %our "ind to f$oat free. C ; ocus on the s $o( s tead% natura$ rh %t h" of %ou r breathing. >et that be the on$% thing %ouAre a(are of (hi$e %our "ind re$a7es.

49

0 C D u s t f $ o a t t h i s ( a % f o r 2 ) "i n u t e s ( h i $ e %o u ( i t n e s s ( h a t %o u r "i n d a n d bod% e7perience. =ou can practice this regu$ar$% before other e7ercises or an%ti"e %ou (ant to diss o$ve an% of the s tress es that %ou accu"u$ate during nor"a$ $ife. 2o"e find that b% recording these instructions on an audio tape and $istening to the" in their o(n voice he$ps the" re$a7 "ore and faster. E+ercise* Muscle (ela+ation In this e7ercise? %ouA$$ s%ste"atica$$% iso$ate? tense? and then re$a7 each "usc$e g r o u p i n %o u r b o d %? s t a r t i n g ( i t h %o u r t o e s . . h e n " u s c $ e s a r e t e n s e ? i t A s co""on for "ost of us to c$ench our ja( "usc$es. 2o a good tip for a$$ e7ercises in this book? especia$$% the re$a7ation ones? is to keep %our tongue on %our pa$ate $ight$% touching the roof of %our "outh. Then %ou canAt unconscious$% bite do(n hard or gnash %our teeth. 1 C > a % d o ( n a n d c $ o s e %o u r e %e s i n t h e c o r p s e p o s t u r e o r a n % o t h e r ( a % %o u fee$ co"fortab$e. BIf the corpse posture isnAt co"fortab$e? find another $%ing or even sitting position (here %ou can tota$$% re$a7.C 2C ; ocus %o ur a( arenes s on %o ur toes ? tens e the" tight$ % for a "o "e nt? and then re$a7 the" for severa$ breaths. ! C ; o c u s %o u r a ( a r e n e s s o n %o u r f e e t ? t e n s e t h e " t i g h t $ % f o r a "o " e n t ? a n d then re$a7 the" for severa$ breaths. 'C Continue doing the sa"e (ith %our $o(er $egs? thighs? genita$s? butt? sto"ach? $o(er back? chest? upper back? hands? forear"s? upper ar"s? shou$ders? neck? and ja(. C I f %o u f e e $ t e n s i o n r e " a i n i n g a n %( h e r e ? r e p e a t t h e c %c $ e u n t i $ %o u f e e $ re$a7ed a$$ over. 0 C T a k e a f e ( "o "e n t s j us t b r e a t h i n g g e n t $ % a n d f e e $ t h e c o "p $ e t e s e n s e o f re$a7ation sink in deep$%.

50

.ith enough re$a7ation practice? %our bod% (i$$ re"e"ber the sensation and %ouA$$ be ab$e to go into this f$oating state Euick$% and easi$% at (i$$. In Chapter ? (eA$$ discuss other re$a7ation techniEues such as "assage (hich reEuire a partner. E+ercise* Sitting Meditation *% intention is not to convert %ou into so"e kind of "odern =ogi or spiritua$ g u r u . B u t t o b e c o "p $ e t e $ % h o n e s t ? "e d i t a t i o n i s o n e o f t h e "o s t p o ( e r f u $ (a%s to re$a7. 2o IA" inc$uding this optiona$ e7ercise (hich I hope %ouA$$ tr% at $east a fe( ti"es to see ho( po(erfu$ it can be. * editation is s i"p$ % s itting and e"p t %i ng the "ind. 2 ince %ou canA t force thoughts a(a%? this is "ore cha$$enging than it sounds. 3urus have deve$oped "an % "edi tat ion techniEues that can he$p %ou Euiet the "ind and enter a Fno "indF condition. IAve tried "an% and the% a$$ seek to create a deep inner peace fi$$ed (ith sti$$ness. T he s i"p$ e "e th od I pr es en t he re j us t gu id es %o u t o ( a tc h %o u r br ea th . It A s good preparation for (hatAs co"ing? because conscious breathing is one of the Tantric ski$$s used in the e7ercises that fo$$o(. 1 C 2 it in a co "f or t ab $ e pos it io n in a Eu ie t un in te rr up te d s p ac e. = es ? %o u h av e to turn off %our phone? pager? and T@. 1C The c$assic posture is the $otus position (ith one $egs crossed over the other. I c an A t ge t a $$ t he ( a % "%s e $ f ? a nd it "a % n ot be e as % f or %o u e it he r. 3 et as c $o s e a s %o u ca n to t hi s p os tu ri ng ? in s u ri ng a t $e as t th at %o u s it u pr ig ht . I u s e a F5afu?F a round D apanes e "editation pi$$o( thatAs rather fir" and s haped $ike a fa t p an ca ke ? to k ee p " % p e$ vi s h ig he r t ha n "% s e"i9 c ro s s ed $ eg s . = ou c an a$so "editate sitting straight in a co"fortab$e chair or sofa. !C * editation is not doing an %t hi ng 9 itA s s i"p $ % being. 2o donA t s et an% goa$s or preconceptions of (hatAs going to happen. Dust sit for a "o"ent and re$a7.

51

'C +s %ou sett$e in to a co"fortab$e state? %ouA$$ undoubted$% discover that %our " i n d i s b u s %. 4 o n A t d o a n %t h i n g a b o u t i t ? j u s t $ e t i t h a p p e n . . i t n e s s i d e a s f$oating b% $ike c$ouds in a brisk (ind. ' C T o E u i e t t h e " i n d ( i t h o u t f o r c e ? ( a t c h %o u r b r e a t h c o " i n g i n a n d o u t . 4onAt change %our breathing conscious$%? just pa% attention to it. C =ouA$$ probab$% find %our concentration (andering a(a% fro" %our breath. 4onA t beat %ou rs e$f up becaus e itA s natura$. .hen %o u rea$i5e %ou A ve s tra %e d? just co"e back to (atching %our breath. C 3urus advise 1 "inutes sitting $ike this "orning and afternoon. 2ince %ou shou$dnAt be (atching the c$ock? IA" not sure ho( %ou shou$d ti"e it. I usua$$% just re"ain sti$$ unti$ I re$a7 and "% "ind sett$es. If %ou incorporate regu$ar "editation into %our $ife? %ouA$$ find that itAs a great (a% to re$ieve s tres s. ItAs suppos ed to be good for %ou ph%s ica$$ % and "enta$$% too. .eA re "os t $ % concerned here ( ith ho( it he$ps %o u ( ith the 1 $ti "a te Ecstatic 2o$ution. +$$ I can sa% is that tension "akes %ou cu" "ore easi$% and re$a7ation is vita$ to $as ting $onger. * editation practice is nA t es s entia$ but it can be a great too$ to re$ease tension and re$a7. E+ercise* Breathing .hen the average person gets c$ose to cu"ing? their breath beco"es shorter a n d f a s t e r ? " a %b e e v e n p a n t i n g u n c o n t r o $ $ a b $ %. 2 o ? o n e o f t h e b e s t ( a %s t o re$a7 (hen e7cited is to $earn to breathe s$o(er and deeper. ;urther? it he$ps to interrupt the stress response %ou "a% e7perience during e7citing or an7ious "o"ents of $ove"aking. *ost of us take breathing for granted. .e breathe sha$$o($% as a ru$e. .e cou$d a$$ benefit fro" "as tering the art of Tantric breathing: re$a7ed? through the "outh? and deep into the be$$%. This kind of fu$$ breathing $o(ers the heart rate and can he$p dissipate the tension of arousa$. Breathing through the "outh is "ore ph%sica$ and sensua$ as opposed to breathing through the nose (hich tends to put the attention in the "ind.

52

1C >a % do( n in a co"for tab$e pos ition $ike the corps e pos ture and c$os e %ou r e%es. 1C 6e"ain co"p$ete$% sti$$? re$a7ing a$$ %our "usc$es? especia$$% %our ana$ and genita$ "us c$es . P res s %o ur tongue gent$ % agains t the roof of %o ur "outh to keep %our ja( re$a7ed. 2C .ithout conscious$% changing an%thing? (atch ho( rapid$% %ou breathe and fee$ ho( deep$% each breath goes. 2C To begin "astering Tantric be$$% breathing? open %our "outh and breathe r h %t h "i c a $ $ % "or e d ee p$ % an d s $ o( $ %. I "a g in e th at %o u r be $$ % i s a n e "p t % ba$$oon that fi$$s and e"pties (ith each re$a7ing breath. !C P ut %our hand on %our be$$ % and (atch it "ove in and out as %ou breathe. If %our hand isnAt "oving? conscious$% force the air do(n deeper. *ake sure that %our breath is "oving %our hand? not the e7tension of %our sto"ach "usc$es. !C To take it a step further? i"agine %our breath going do(n into %our pe$vis? ( ashing? c$eans ing? and sti"u$ating. +s %our breath trick$es out? i"agine it $eaving ever% "usc$e tota$$% re$a7ed. 2 $o( deep be$$% breathing is an ess entia$ co"ponent of the 1 $ti"ate Ecs tatic 2 o $ u t i o n . P r a c t i c e t h i s a s $ o n g a n d a s o f t e n a s %o u n e e d . C o n t i n u e p r a c t i c i n g it unti$ %ou can easi$% and rh%th"ica$$% fa$$ into s$o( re$a7ing be$$% breathing through the "outh.

!.% Opening /enses


T he s e ne 7t e7 er ci s e s a re a$ $ ab ou t d ev e$ op in g t he + o f 6+ * P E6 ? n a"e $ % a ( a r e n e s s o f %o u r b o d %. T h i s i s h o ( %o u ( i $ $ $ e a r n t o b e " o r e p r e s e n t a n d focus in the right direction. 4o %ou re"e"ber that presence and visua$i5ation together are one of the four cornerstones of ecstatic se7-

53

4id an%one ever suggest to %ou that the (a% to avoid cu"ing (as b% thinking about bas eba$$? ( ork? or %o ur grand"o ther- .e$$? this part of the 1 $ti "ate E c s t a t i c 2 o $ u t i o n i s t h e e 7 a c t o p p o s i t e . I t A s a b o u t p a %i n g "a 7 i "u " a t t e n t i o n to the sensations that arise in ever% part of %our bod%. B% opening %our senses "ore? %ou can enjo% each $itt$e "o"ent of p$easure to the fu$$est. O f cours e? this reEuires s $o( ing do( n and re$a7ing into the e7perience. = our ai " is to engage a$$ of %ou r erogenous 5ones and %o ur ( ho$e bod %. .hen %ou re$a7 into fee$ing the e7citation in %o ur head? feet? butt? and nipp$es ? jus t to s ugges t a fe( s ubt$e erogenous 5ones that IA ve $earned to "ake "e ver% hot? %ou shift %our focus a(a% fro" %our genita$s. This is a basic pre"ise of the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution? spreading the energ% a(a% fro" the genita$s? so %ou can have (ho$e bod% orgas"s (ithout an e7p$osive ejacu$ation fro" %our one9 e%ed p$easure stick. I kno( that itA s one thing to practice b% %ourse$f and another (hen %ouA re ( ith a ( i $ d $ % b u c k i n g p a r t n e r . B u t b e $ i e v e "e ? "o s t $ o v e r s r e a $ $ % ( a n t t h e s $ o( sensitive savoring attention that opening %our senses brings. >etAs start so$o a n %( a % an d ( o rr % ab ou t e ng ag in g pa rt ne r co op er at io n o nc e %o u A v e "a s t er e d the basics. E+ercise* Vi,assana Meditation This is a sensor% "editation designed to open "u$tip$e senses at once. Practice this e7ercise in a safe p$ace outside (here %ou (onAt be interrupted B%our back %a r d ( h e n n o o n e i s h o " e - C o r i n s i d e i f n e c e s s a r %. T a k e %o u r s h o e s o f f i f %ouAre inside or if itAs safe outside to (a$k barefoot (here %ou practice. =ou can (ear c$othes for this e7ercise? but itAs a$so great if %ou can do it in the nude? especia$$% outside if %ou enjo% that. 1C C$ose %our e%es and stand sti$$ co"fortab$%? (atching %our breath for a fe( "inutes unti$ %ou fee$ re$a7ed. 1C ; ee$ the $eve$ of tens ion and re$a7at ion in ever% "us c$e s tarting ( ith %ou r feet and "oving up to the top of %our head.

54

!C /e7t? (hi$e "aintaining tota$ a(areness of %our bod%? %ouAre going to "ove around ver% ver% s$o($% (ith "a7i"u" consciousness. 4onAt open %our e%es co"p $et e$ % but keep the " s oft$% focus ed so %ou donA t hurt %o urs e$f. .a$k as s $o( $% as %ou can? fee$ing the "inute "ove"ents of ever% "usc$e as %ou $ift e a c h f o o t a n d $ e g . T h e n f e e $ t h e p r e s s u r e a n d " o t i o n o f %o u r ( h o $ e b o d % a s %ou s et it do( n and shift %ou r ( eight? fee$ing the te7ture of the gras s or f$oor? or the hardness and evenness of the ground. 'C +fter a fe( "inutes of co"p$ete focus on the ph%sica$ sensations of (a$king? add pa%ing attention to %our s ens e of sight. Obs erve s $o( $% and in detai$ (hat %ou see: shapes? te7tures? and co$ors. *aintain tota$ a(areness of %our bod% (hi$e (a$king. If %ou accidenta$$% shift %our attention entire$% to %our sense of s ight? re"ind %o urs e$f to keep fee$ing ever%th ing happening in %o ur bod % as (e$$. C . h e n %o u A r e r e a d % f o r "o r e ? a d d %o u r s e n s e o f h e a r i n g . > i s t e n f o r a n % a n d a $ $ s o u n d s a r o u n d %o u . I f %o u A r e o u t s i d e ? %o u " i g h t h e a r t h e ( i n d ? t h e r u s t $ e of $eaves ? birds ? and cars . If %ou A re ins ide? %o u "ight be a"a5ed at a$$ the a"bient sounds a$$ around %ou: creaking (a$$s and f$oors? p$u"bing and heating? and nois es fro" co"put ers and app$iances . / o( %o uA re s ens ing %o ur bod%? sight? and hearing a$$ together. 0C ;ina$$%? add %our sense of s"e$$. If %ouAre outside in the spring? there (i$$ be "an% (onderfu$ scents on the (ind. .henever and (herever %ou are though? inc$ude an%thing %our nose picks up. I d onA t k no( a s a fe ( a % b % %o u rs e $f to a dd th e s ens e o f ta s t e. ; o r th at ? %o uA $ $ have to visit us for a Tantric initiation or e7change 2ensor% +(akening 6itua$s ( it h a p ar tn er . BT hi s is d es cr ib ed i n d et ai $ i n % he & r t O f ( ex ua l / cs ta s y , b % *argot +nand on page :0. ItAs avai$ab$e through the resources section of our ( ebs it e ht tp :O O( ( ( .t an tr a a t ta ho e .c o "O r es ou rc es .h t ". C +t so"e points in this e7ercise %ouA$$ probab$% tune out and forget to focus on o n e o r " o r e s e n s e s . 1 n $ e s s %o u A r e a = o g a "a s t e r ? e 7 p e c t i t a n d d o n A t ( o r r % about. Dust keep practicing ever% da% or so unti$ %o u can spread %o ur attention throughout a$$ the sensor% input reaching %ou for a fe( "o"ents.

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=ouA$$ be a"a5ed ho( "uch this (i$$ increase %our p$easure during $ove"aking? (hether so$o or (ith a partner. +nd itAs essentia$ to be ab$e to "aster %our ejacu$ation response. E+ercise* E$aculation A/ areness =ou no( get to start one of "% favorite parts of this progra"? se$f9p$easuring vaj ra. The firs t e7ercis e is des igned to heighten %ou r a( arenes s of %o ur ejacu$ation response: the point of no return? e"ission? and e7pu$sion. + ctua$$ %? it be$ongs in the ne7t s ection? but IA ve put a cop% here in cas e %ou cu" during the re"aining e7ercises. This (a% %ouA$$ kno( ho( to take fu$$ advantage of this jo%ous e7perience and $earn fro" it (henever it happens. IA " not kidding about prais ing the ver % thing %o uA re tr%in g to contro$. P art of this e7ercise is to enjo% the intense p$easure of ejacu$ating so %ouA$$ kno( (hat energ% and sensations to spread throughout %our bod% to pro$ong $ove"aking. O<? got it- 2o read this e7ercise no( but (ait unti$ $ater to practice intentiona$$%. B % the (a%? thereAs no pena$t% for doing this e7ercise "u$tip$e ti"es? p$anned a nd un p$ an ne d. Th e "or e %o u $ ea rn a bo ut %o u r b od %A s r es po ns e s ? t he be tt er %o u A $ $ b e at th e 1 $ ti "a te Ec s t at i c 2 o $u ti on . + s ( e d is cu s s e d ea r$ ie r? th er eA s a price to $earning ho( to p$a % on the edge of cu"ing. The good ne( s Obad ne(s is that %ouA$$ undoubted$% s$ip freEuent$% unti$ %ou deve$op the knack of f$irting (ith the edge. Part of this e7ercise is to take the attitude that %ou (i$$ accept and enjo% the e7perience instead of dreading it. 1C 2e$f9p$easure vajra s$o($%? fee$ing a$$ %our sensations fu$$%. 2C +s %ou reach the point of no return? stop a$$ "otion. !C 6 e$a7 b % taking deep breaths and focus %ou r attent ion on a$$ parts of %ou r bod%? especia$$% %our genita$s. 1 C + s %o u c u "? f e e $ t h e s e "e n "o v i n g f r o " %o u r d e v a " a n i B t e s t i c $ e s C t o t h e base of vajra (ith s"ooth "usc$e contractions Be"ission phaseC.

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C /otice the de$a% bet(een phases and then the invo$untar% sEuee5es of %our pe$vic "usc$es (hich cause the se"en to sEuirt out Be7pu$sion phaseC. C / o ( f o c u s o n ( h a t %o u $ e a r n e d a n d g i v e t h a n k s t h a t %o u c a n e 7 p e r i e n c e such intens e p$easure. E +ercise* 'h ole Body Sen sory 1ocus + genera$ ai" of the 1 $ti"a te Ecs tati c 2 o$ution is to beco "e "ore a( are of %ou r bod % and ho( %ou res pond during s e7? fro" initia$ e7cite"ent? through fu$$ arous a$? to the ti "e %ou reach orgas ". In this e7ercis e? %ou A $$ us e gent$e se$f9"assage a$$ over %our bod% to achieve this e7p$oration. 1C 2it or $ie do(n nude in a re$a7ed posture in a safe? co"fortab$e? uninterrupted space. 1C Take a fe( deep be$$% breaths to re$a7 and $et go of an% stress %ouAve been carr%ing. 1C 1sing one hand at first? $ight$% and s$o($% touch %our (ho$e bod% e7c$uding %o u r g e n i t a $ s . = o u ( a n t t o u s e ( h a t s o " e c a $ $ a F t a k i n g t o u c h F ( h i c h " e a n s to fee$ as "uch (ith the touching hand as (ith the part thatAs being caressed. 2C E7p$ore a$$ parts of %our bod% gent$% and s$o($%? e7cept %our genita$s? as if %ou (ere a %oung chi$d (ith a ne( to%. E7peri"ent (ith different strokes on different bod% parts? fee$ing each sensation as if for the first ti"e. !C =ouAre sti$$ breathing deep$% and s$o($% in %our be$$%? right'C /e7t? do the sa"e (ith %our genita$s. =es? I "ean %our vajra as (e$$ as %our deva "ani and an%( h ere around there that turns %ou on. E7p$ore %ou r favorite p ar ts in t he s a "e ch i$ d$ i ke ( a % $i gh t$ % a nd s $o( $ % ( i th ou t t r %i n g to "a ke %ourse$f cu". B.eA$$ get to that part of the e7ercise $ater.C B% the (a%? if %ou do go past the point of no return? enjo% it. If it takes %ou a (hi$e to recharge %our

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s ens itivit %? %o u "ight (ant to take a break for a ( hi$e before res u"ing this e7ercise. 8C Then? inc$ude %our (ho$e bod% in the sa"e (a%? e7c$uding nothing. &C If this turns %ou on and %ou f ee $i ng s fu $$ %. , o( d oe s be in g hair? nipp$es ? deva "ani? vaj ra? different to the hands taking touch get hard? (e$$? thatAs greatG ;ee$ those e7cited t ur ne d9 o n af fe ct d if fe re nt p ar ts of %o u r bo d %: etc. ,o( do a$$ the parts of %o ur bod% fee$ (hen %ouAre e7cited-

E+ercise* Self8)leasuring 7iscovery The 1 $ti "at e Ecs tatic 2 o$ution is about increas ing p$eas ure of a$$ kinds . Tantrikas honor? a$ "os t ( ors hip? p$eas ure as a divine gift. 2 o %ou ( onA t find "e us ing the ter" "as turb ation? s ince thatA s got a$$ kinds of hidden? gui$t %? dirt% connotations. This e7ercise is about se$f9p$easuring? giving %ourse$f the gift of the "a7i"u" p $e as ur e t ha t %o u r bo d % af fo rd s . + n d d is co ve ri ng ( ha t %o u $ ik e b es t ( h i$ e fee$ing ever%thing deep$% and open$%. O<? it sti$$ "eans rubbing %our cock? but %ouA r e suppos ed to do it ( ith the Tantric attitude : open? accepting? and appreciating. 2ince this is an appreciation e7ercise? I havenAt reco""ended using $ubrication $ike @ as e$ine ( hich increas es s ens itivi t %. >ater? IA $$ reco""en d us ing an oi$9 bas ed $ubricant to heighten the s ti"u$ation. * an% peop$e us e "as sage oi$ or bab% oi$. If %ou prefer co"p$ete$% natura$ things? tr% o$ive oi$. *% favorite is +$bo$ene? a "ake9up re"over %ou can get at big drug stores. There are $ots of options at se7 shops. *ost of "% partners prefer (ater9based $ubricants during intercourse. Thes e (ork ( e$$ at first for se$f9p$easuring unti$ the% dr% out? (hich is Euick$%. If %ouAre rea$? rea$ sensitive? %ouA$$ probab$% (ant to do 2e$f9P$easuring 4iscover% dr% no(. >ater (hen I ask? %ou can use so"e kind of se$f9p$easuring crea". ItAs up to %ou. 1 C ; i n d a c o "f o r t a b $ e ? s a f e ? u n i n t e r r u p t e d p $ a c e t o p r a c t i c e i n t h e n u d e . I enjo% se$f9p$easuring ritua$s sitting on the f$oor cross9$egged in "editation

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position in front of a fu$$ $ength "irror (ith cand$es burning and sensua$ "usic p$a%ing. 2C .hi$e observing %our bod% fro" above or in a "irror? begin deep s$o( be$$% breathing to re$a7 and charge %our energ% s%ste". 2C 2tart p$easuring %ourse$f (herever fee$s good. I often $ike to gent$% rub "% chest? head? and feet before approaching vajra. E7peri"ent to find (hat arousa$ pattern (orks best for %ou. !C .hen %ou begin s troking vaj ra? re"e "b er to go s $o( $%? re$a7? and enj o%. O p e n a $ $ %o u r s e n s e s ? c o n t i n u i n g t o b r e a t h e T a n t r i c a $ $ %. 4 o n A t b e i n a h u r r %G 3ive %ourse$f those (onderfu$ juic% turned9on fee$ings and e7perience each s ens ation fu$$%. +nd donA t forget the res t of %our bod%. 6e"e"ber to use %our other hand to arouse different parts of bod%: nipp$es? deva"ani? pubic bone? perineu" Bbet( een %our anus and deva"aniC? and anus . / othing is off $i"its if i t t u r n s %o u o n . + g a i n ? %o u r a i " i s t o f e e $ " o r e ? n o t t o c u " . B u t i f %o u d o ? (e$$? greatG Dust co"e back and finish the e7ercise (hen %ouAre read%. ' C E 7p er i "en t ( i th d if fe re nt s t ro ke s ? s p ee ds ? an d p re s s u re s to f in d o ut ( ha t creates (hat sensations and (hatAs "ost intense$% p$easurab$e. IA" right9 h a n d e d ? b u t f o r s o "e r e a s o n IA v e a $ ( a %s p r e f e r r e d " % $ e f t a r o u n d v a j r a ( i t h pa$" up. 6ecent$% IAve $earned to appreciate the right9handed overhand approach (ith "% pa$" do(n. ,ere are so"e things to tr%... +$ternate hands to see (hich fee$s better. Tr% up strokes? do(n strokes? thu"b for(ard and thu"b back. Concentrate on the shaft? on the head Bg$ans or cro(nC? and the frenu$u" Bthe sensitive underside of the headC. 1 s e %o u r t h u " b a n d f o r e f i n g e r a s a r i n g u p ( a r d s a n d d o ( n ( a r d s ( ith thu"b for(ard and back. 6o$$ vajra in bet(een both hands? and use both hands fro" "id9 shaft out or fro" top and botto" to "idd$e. 6 u b v a j r a A s u n d e r s i d e ( i t h t h e f $ a t o f %o u r h a n d ? a n d p r e s s o r r o $ $ vajra against %our be$$% or thigh. Pu$$ or tick$e %our deva"ani (ith the other hand.

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I 1se the corkscre(? rotating %our hand as it s$ides up? and the pop9off? s E u e e 5 i n g ( h i $ e %o u s u d d e n $ % p u $ $ %o u r h a n d u p a n d o v e r v a j r a A s head. 2o"e of these "a% be rough or unco"fortab$e (ithout $ubrication. If %ou find t ha t to be t he ca s e ? d o th e c o"fo r t ab $ e o ne s fi rs t an d t he n us e a n oi $ or c re a " for the re"aining ones. / o ( ( a s n A t t h a t f u n - 4 i d %o u $ e a r n a n %t h i n g n e ( - I f n o t ? d i d %o u a t $ e a s t re$a7 and enjo% %ourse$fE+ercise* Self8)leasuring Vocally 2 o u n d i s o n e o f t h e f o u r c o r n e r s t o n e s o f s e 7 u a $ e c s t a s %. B e c a u s e "o s t o f us are conditioned to be Euiet during se7? fe( rea$i5e the potentia$ po(er of sound to sti"u$ate and regu$ate e7cite"ent. 1sing the sounds that natura$$% e"anate fro" %our bod% (hen itAs fee$ing p$easure is a great (a% to circu$ate energ % and s pread the urge to cu". This e7ercis e is the s a"e as the previous one (ith one change? %ou get to verba$i5e. 2 o"e peop$e find this difficu$t at firs t? becaus e itA s s o different fro" ( hat t h e %A r e a c c u s t o " e d t o d o i n g . B u t t h e n %o u A v e a $ r e a d % a c c e p t e d t h e i d e a t h a t %ou need to change dra"a tica $$ % to be a * as ter of Orgas "s ? right- , ereAs a great (a% to reinforce %our co""it"ent to transfor" %our se7ua$it%. Besides? "ost $overs rea$$% $ove an e7pressive? passionate partner in the sack. 1C ;ind a practice space (here thereAs no chance of being overheard. If %ou $ive (ithin thin (a$$s around others? this "ight "ean a hike into the (i$derness for practicing. 2C 6epeat the 2e$f9P$easuring 4iscover% E7ercise? concentrating on %our favorite "oves. =ou kno(? the things %ou $earned that give %ou the greatest p$easure. !C ;ee$ (hat %ou are doing and a$$o( each sensation to beco"e itAs o(n sound. 1 s e "oans ? groans ? grunts ? gro( $s ? cries ? s ighs ? ( hines ? or even $aughs . To e"phasi5e %our earth% nature? visua$i5e ani"a$s and "ake the kind of sounds the% "ake.

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'C One at a ti"e? practice using the vo(e$s: +? E? I? O? 1. 2o"e (ork great for e7pressing different p$easurab$e fee$ings. C Once %ou get accusto"ed to converting fee$ing into sounds? practice "aking %our verba$i5ations t(ice as $oud. =ou "a% have to force it at first? but give it a tr%. Then doub$e the vo$u"e again and again unti$ %ouAre screa"ing. 0C =ouAre sti$$ breathing deep$% IA" s ure becaus e %ou canAt be voca$ (ithout breath. @ is ua$i5e the breath going into %o ur erogenous 5ones ? fue$ing the p$eas ure %o uA re creating. + nd then vis ua$i5e the s ound "oving that e7cited se7ua$ energ% up? around? and out. 4oes it "ake sense (hen I sa% these e7ercises are cu"u$ative- .hat I "ean is that each $itt$e ski$$ adds up to Orgas" *aster%. 2o %ou shou$d natura$$% be i n c o r p o r a t i n g e v e r % t h i n g %o u $ e a r n i n t o $ a t e r e 7 e r c i s e s . ; r o " h e r e o n o u t %ouA r e going to re$a7? breathe s $o( $ % and deep$ % in the be$$ %? keep a$$ %ou r s ens es open? "ake s ounds that e7pres s ho( %o uA re fee$ing? and enj o% %o urs e$f at a$$ ti"es. =ouAre doing a$$ that no(? right- If not? practice this e7ercise so"e "ore and be sure %ou fo$$o( these guide$ines fro" here on out. ;or the "ost part? I havenAt to$d %ou ho( "an% ti"es to do each e7ercise or for ho( $ong. ,o( "uch %ou need or (ant depends on %ou. Part of the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution is deve$oping %our o(n judg"ent about ho( %ouAre doing and (hat (arrants "ore practice. =ou "a% (ant to repeat so"e of these e7ercises freEuent$% or routine$%. <eep doing the ones (hich "ake %ou fee$ good. ;ro" here on? if %ou find %ouAre not re$a7ed or canAt focus a$$ %our senses during the co"ing practices ? go back and continue the re$a7ing and opening e7ercis es ear$ier in this chapter.

!.- 'easured /elf5Pleasuring


/o(? (eAre going to add the * 9 "easuring %our arousa$ $eve$ 9 to the re$a7ation and a( arenes s %ouA re deve$oping. 6e"e"ber "% 1) point sca$e for "onitoring %our e7cite"ent $eve$-

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) P no arousa$ 1 P t(inge at base of penis 2 P occasiona$ $itt$e surges of p$easure ! P starting to fee$ good ' P stead% hu" $o( $eve$ arousa$ P fee$ing rea$$% good? "etabo$is" increases 0 P rea$$% into it? donAt (ant to stop 8 P continuous rush of p$easure? fast breathing & P bu55ing inside? face f$ushed? heart pounding : P intense p$easure? outside (or$d is far a(a% :.: P point of no return? e"ission phase begins 1) P ejacu$ation Be7pu$sion phaseC ,ereAs (here (e start using this sca$e intensive$%. +s %ou practice the fo$$o(ing se$f9p$easuring e7ercises Band $ater (ith a partnerC? continua$$% "onitor %our position on the sca$e. E+ercise* E$aculation A/ areness .hether %ouAve cu" during the previous sensua$ e7ercises or not? itAs ti"e to c o n s c i o u s $ % p r a c t i c e f e e $ i n g a s "u c h a s %o u c a n ( h i $ e s E u i r t i n g . T h i s i s a r e p e a t o f ( h a t I i n c $ u d e d i n t h e p r e v i o u s s e c t i o n ? b u t a t t h i s p o i n t %o u A r e supposed to "aster it. The e7ercise is si"p$e 9 get %ourse$f off and enjo% it. 2ince Ejacu$ation +(areness is designed to increase %our consciousness of the p h %s i ca $ ch an ge s %o u r bo d % e 7p er ie nc es d ur in g e 7p $o s i ve or ga s "? %o u s h ou $d do this as s$o($% as possib$e. ,ave %ou ever tried to "ake it $ast as $ong as p o s s i b $ e - . e $ $ ? n o ( %o u ( i $ $ . I " a g i n e %o u A r e a ( i t n e s s t o a s c i e n t i f i c e7peri"ent. =our assign"ent is to "enta$$% record the input %ou receive fro" a$$ %our senses. ThatAs (h% %ou spent that ti"e practicing open senses. 1 C 2 e $ f p $ e a s u r e s $ o ( $ %? f e e $ i n g a $ $ %o u r s e n s a t i o n s f u $ $ %. 1 s e $ u b r i c a n t t o heighten %our sensitivit% if %ou (ant. 1C +s %ou use different strokes to turn %ourse$f on? si"p$% notice %our $eve$ of arousa$ rising on the 1) point sca$e.

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!C +re %ou a(are of changes in %our bod%- ,eart rate? "usc$e tension? breathing? tight deva"ani? etc.!C .hen %ou reach :.:? the point of no return? stop a$$ "otion. 'C 6 e$a7 b % taking deep breaths and focus %ou r attent ion on a$$ parts of %ou r bod%? especia$$% %our genita$s. C +s %ou cu"? fee$ the se"en "oving fro" %our deva"ani to the base of vajra (ith s"ooth "usc$e contractions Be"ission phaseC. 0C /otice the de$a% bet(een phases and then the invo$untar% sEuee5es of %our pe$vic "usc$es (hich cause the co$$ected se"en to sEuirt out Be7pu$sion phaseC. ' C / o ( f o c u s o n ( h a t %o u $ e a r n e d a n d g i v e t h a n k s t h a t %o u c a n e 7 p e r i e n c e such intens e p$easure. 4 id %ou notice the changes %ou r bod % e7perienc ed as %o u got c$os e to :.:Cou$d %ou fee$ the point of no return and the interna$ e"ission contractions of %our pros tate before the e7pu$s ion caus ed b% %our pe$vic "us c$es- If not? ( h% d o n A t %o u t r % i t a g a i n ( h e n %o u A r e r e a d %. 6 e p e a t t h e e 7 e r c i s e u n t i $ %o u c a n rea$$% fee$ (hatAs happening do(n there. E+ercise* Self8)leasuring By The 2umbers + "ajor part of se$f9"onitoring during %our individua$ practices (i$$ be $earning h o ( c $ o s e %o u c a n g o t o : . : ( i t h o u t s E u i r t i n g . 1 p t o t h i s p o i n t ( e h a v e n A t "ade a big dea$ about avoiding cu"ing or contro$$ing %our $eve$ of e7citation. /o(? to deve$op greater a(areness and "aster% over %our orgas"s? (eAre going to repeat the previous e7ercise (ith a nu"erica$ t(ist. ,opefu$$%? %ouAve been noticing %o ur $eve$ of arous a$ at each "o"ent during the previous e7ercis es . /o(? 2e$f P$easuring B% The /u"bers asks %ou to e7cite %ourse$f to a specific $eve$ and then stop. Of course? (eA$$ be upping the ante at each step getting

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c$oser and c$oser to the top. *a%be %ouA$$ go over the top and "a%be %ou (onAt. It doesnAt "atter as $ong as %ouAre tuning in to %our $eve$ of arousa$. 1 C 2 e $ f p $ e a s u r e s $ o ( $ %? f e e $ i n g a $ $ %o u r s e n s a t i o n s f u $ $ %. 1 s e $ u b r i c a n t t o heighten %our sensitivit% if %ou (ant. 2 C . h e n %o u r a r o u s a $ $ e v e $ r e a c h e s ' ? s t o p a $ $ " o t i o n ? r e $ a 7 e v e r % ( h e r e i n c $ u d i n g %o u r p e $ v i s b % t a k i n g d e e p b r e a t h s ? f o c u s %o u r a t t e n t i o n o n %o u r entire bod%? especia$$% %our genita$s? and drink in the p$easure. 1C .hen %o ur e7cite"en t drops to 2? s tart s e$f9p$eas uring again. This cou$d be a fe( seconds or a fe( "inutes. 2C .hen %ou reach 0 on the sca$e? stop? re$a7? breathe? and enjo%. !C .hen %our e7cite"ent drops to 2 again? begin again. 'C .hen %ou reach &? stop? re$a7? breathe? and enjo%. C .hen %our e7cite"ent drops to 2 again? begin again. 0C .hen %ou reach :? stop? re$a7? breathe? and enjo%. :C If %ou choose? repeat this c%c$e over and over? pausing at each point on the sca$e B!? '? ? etc.C and seeing ho( c$ose %ou can skirt :.: (ithout cu"ing. +ctua$$%? thatAs a$$ there is to the * of 6+*PE6. =ouA$$ probab$% (ant to repeat this practice unti$ %ouA r e rea$$ % c$ear on each of the nu"bers . * ake up %ou r o(n definitions if that he$ps %ou identif% the e7cite"ent at each $eve$.

!.6 PC Pu"p
.eA ve "ade great progres s ( ith 6? + ? and * of 6+ * P E6? but I (ant to s kip a h e a d t o a v i t a $ s e r i e s o f e 7 e r c i s e s t o s t r e n g t h e n %o u r s e 7 u a $ "u s c $ e s . 1 s i n g %ou r interna$ pe$vic "us c$es is a vita$ part of E? a ke % "e thod of circu$a ting energ%. ThatAs because toning the "usc$es at the f$oor of %our pe$vis is critica$

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t o t h i s p r o g r a " a n d i t d o e s n A t h a p p e n o v e r n i g h t . I ( a n t %o u t o a d d s o " e o f these e7ercises to %our dai$% routine no( so %ouA$$ get the benefit $ater (hen (e need the". IA " t a$ ki ng ab ou t %o u r P C "u s c $ e? s ho rt fo r pu bo co cc %g e u s . I kn o( t ha tA s a "outhfu $ but itA s eas % to identif %. P ut one of %o ur hands on %o ur pubic bone? the inside one thatAs above %our vajra at the botto" of %our tu""%. /o( reach around behind and put %our other hand near the top of %our crack at the ver% botto" of %our spine. ThatAs %our cocc%7. The PC "usc$e snakes do(n around %ou r ros etta Bas s ho$eC and genita$s and connects thes e t( o bones p$us %ou r sitting bones and $egs. I tA s e ve n "or e i"po r ta n t t o id en ti f % th e "us c$ e fr o" t he i ns id e. It A s th e o ne %ou tighten (hen %ou (ant to sEuee5e out the $ast fe( drops of pee or need to s top "ids tr ea". Tr% s Euee5ing it no( . 4 id %ou "ake %o ur vaj ra ju"p- If %o u canA t is o$ate it? take a break and go the bathroo" right no( . 2 tart peeing and stop in the "idd$e. .hen %ouAre finished? tr% to sEuee5e the $ast fe( drops out. The "usc$e %ou used to stop "idstrea" and sEuee5e at the end is %our PC. .hen %ou start practicing as described be$o(? %ou "a% find that %ouAre a$so tightening %o ur s to"ach "us c$es . 4 onA tA (orr % about it for no( . .ithin a fe( da%s or (eeks? %ouA$$ $earn to iso$ate %our "usc$e contro$ so %ouA$$ on$% f$e7 the pe$vic f$oor (here the PC resides. B % the ( a%? if %ouA v e been invo$ved in a (o"anA s recover% after chi$dbirth? %ouAve probab$% heard of <ege$s. These are si"i$ar e7ercises deve$oped b% a g%neco$ogist in 1: 2 na"ed of a$$ things 4r. +rno$d <ege$. ,e taught (o"en to f$e7 their P C "us c$es to res tore tone after the trau "a of chi$dbirth and he$p the" regain contro$ of their urinar% ref$e7es. .e gu%s are "ore interested in ho( PC pu"ps BthatAs (hat (e usua$$% ca$$ a$$ these re$ated sEuee5e e7ercisesC benefit the "a$e anato"%. +s (ith an% ph%sica$ ca$isthenics? i"proved tone gives %ou better "usc$e contro$. .hen a "usc$e is (eak? it instead fee$s $ike "ush after a $itt$e e7ercise. If %ou deve$op a strong PC "usc$e? %ou can have stronger erections? "ore po(erfu$ orgas"s? and spread the se7ua$ energ% of e7p$osive orgas"s up throughout the bod%.

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The PC pu$ses rh %th"ica$$% during intercourse and rapid$% during the e7pu$s ion phas e of ej acu$ation. If %o u s trengthen and tone it sufficient $ %? %o u can $earn to regu$ate its contractions ? cons cious $ % "ak ing the" s $o( er. This e 7p an ds o rg as "ic s e ns a ti on d ur in g $ ov e "a k in g a nd s pr ea ds t he p$ ea s u re o ut . *ost s ignificant$ %? it reduces the urge to e7p$ode. 2o"e be$ieve that thes e e7ercis es a$s o "as s age %ou r pros tate and keep that vita$ organ hea$thier 9 a great side benefit. +s far as IA" concerned? thatAs a$$ (e$$ and good as $ong as it gives us greater contro$ over the ejacu$ation response? (hich it does. E+ercise Guidelines 2i7 e7ercises designed to strengthen and tone %our PC "usc$e fo$$o(. 2 t a r t b % d o i n g t h e f i r s t e 7 e r c i s e t ( i c e a d a %? g r a d u a $ $ % i n c r e a s i n g %o u r repetitions? and then adding the other e7ercises one at a ti"e as e7p$ained be$o( . If %o u can practice each e7ercis e three or four ti "es a da %? itA s even better at the s tart. D us t donA t pus h it too fas t and "ake %o urs e $f sore. I kno( %o u A r e a t o u g h g u % ( h o c a n h a n d $ e a $ i t t $ e p a i n n o ( a n d t h e n . P a i n d o e s n A t he$p a Tantric progra". 1se p$easure instead. =ou need to deve$op a successfu$ dai$% regi"en so %ou donAt forget. + coup$e of paragraphs ago I to$d %ou to deve$op %our judg"ent about (hat %ou need to practice ( hen. That app$ies to "os t ever %t hi ng in this progra"? e7cept P C pu"ps are different. ThatAs because ever%one needs to keep the" in shape for opti "u" s e7ua$ perfor"an ce. B% the (a %? be sure to do thes e practic es naked or (ith $oose c$othing so thereAs no constriction do(n there around the "usc$es %ouA$$ be (orking. ;ind a ti"e and p$ace (here %ouA$$ re"e"ber to do %our PC pu"ps. +fter I deve$oped "% "usc$es (ith severa$ dai$% sets? I chose a dai$% ritua$ in "% $ife for "% "aintenance progra" 9 soaking in the hot tub. ThatAs (here I do "% PC pu"ps ever% da%. =ou "ight use the beginning of %our co""ute to and fro" (ork? as %ou stop for traffic $ights? (hen %ou check %our e"ai$? during T@ c o " " e r c i a $ s ? o r ( h e n %o u s t a r t %o u r ( o r k o u t a t t h e g %" . . h a t e v e r %o u choose? do it regu$ar$% so it beco"es an integra$ part of %our $ife routine. 2ince

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it does nA t s ee" to "att er ( hat pos ition %ouA r e in for thes e e7ercis es ? %o u can choose (henever and (herever best jogs %our "e"or%. 6 e " e " b e r ? d o n A t p u s h %o u r s e $ f a n d s t r a i n %o u r g r o i n a t t h e o u t s e t . I n s t e a d use the Tantric approach and bui$d up gradua$$%. 1se be$$% breathing to he$p sti"u$ate %our energ% f$o( (hi$e %ou practice. 6e$a7 ever%thing e$se (hen %ou do PC pu"ps. If %ou tend to tense up? put %our tongue on %our pa$ate so (onAt c$ench %our ja(. , ere I a " again re"ind ing %ou about the firs t 6 of 6+ * P E6. ThatA s re$a7? re"e"ber- These e7ercises "a% be about sEuee5ing %our PC "usc$e? but the r e $ a 7 i n g i n b e t ( e e n e a c h c o n t r a c t i o n i s v i t a $ . I f %o u A r e t e n s e ? %o u r s e 7 u a $ e n e r g % g e t s t r a p p e d a n d c a n A t f $ o ( . C o n s e E u e n t $ %? t h e u n f $ e 7 e d " o " e n t s bet( een pu"ps are as i "portan t as the s trengthening. 2ure? get into the habit of sEuee5ing to tone the "usc$es? but put as "uch attention on re$a7ing tota$$% bet(een f$e7es. E+ercise* )C 1le+ 2 E u e e 5 e a n d r e $ e a s e %o u r P C " u s c $ e a t t h e r a t e o f %o u r h e a r t b e a t ? ( h i c h "e ans ho$d it each ti"e for about a s econd. 2 tart ( ith 2) contractions t( ice a d a % a n d b u i $ d u p t o a t $ e a s t 8 p e r s e t . . h e n %o u A r e d o i n g 8 t ( i c e a d a % easi$%? add the PC C$ench. E+ercise* )C Clench / e7t? practice c$enching %o ur PC ( hi$e inha$ing. B % c$enches I "e an to ho$d the s Euee5e for a $onger period of ti"e. 2o"e e7perts sa% ! seconds? so"e sa% 0? so"e sa% 1 . * a%be the%A re a$$ right so I suggest %ou start ( ith ! and ( ork up to 1 seconds per c$ench. To do c$enches? inha$e and c$ench %our PC? ho$ding it tight$%. Then push it out a n d r e $ a 7 f o r t h e s a " e a " o u n t o f t i " e b e f o r e %o u r n e 7 t c $ e n c h . 6 e p e a t t h i s c%c$e 2) ti"es t(ice a da% at first. +s (ith f$e7es? bui$d up to 8 reps t(ice a da%.

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The c$ench? contracting ( hi$e inha$ing and ho$ding? is the t %p e of P C P u"p %ouA$$ be using ver% soon to "ove se7ua$ energ% up out of %our genita$ region. .hen %ouAre co"fortab$e doing f$e7es and c$enches? add 6osetta Contractions. E+ercise* (osetta Contractions T h i s e 7 e r c i s e b e g i n s ( i t h t h e p a r t o f %o u r P C "u s c $ e a r o u n d %o u r r o s e t t a B a s s h o $ e C a n d s p r e a d s t o %o u r ( h o $ e P C . . e A r e a i "i n g t o c o n t r a c t t h e P C around the s phincter that %o u us e to s top a bo( e$ "ove"en t? but? at the s tart? "ost of us a$so contract our $o(er sto"ach "usc$es? too. B egin b% s i"p$ % re$a7ing and focus ing %ou r attent ion on %ou r ros etta. Take a ha$f9 breath? fi$$ing %ou r $ungs about ha$f ( a %? and pus h the air do( n as far as %o u c a n . , o $ d %o u r b r e a t h a n d t i g h t e n %o u r a n a $ s p h i n c t e r a s f i r " $ % a s %o u can. This shou$d cause %our rosetta to open a bit or push out(ard. /o( e7pand the contraction fro" the anus through the pe$vic f$oor to the genita$s. .hen %o u get the hang of it? %o u shou$d fee$ a definite tug on %o ur tes tic$es . ,o$d ever%thing tight for a fe( seconds and then re$a7 on %our outbreath. +gain? start (ith 2) t(ice a da% and (ork up fro" there. .hen ana$ contractions beco"e eas%? add 4eva"ani E$evations. E+ercise* 7evamani Elevations / o ( f o r t h e ( e i r d e s t s o u n d i n g o f a $ $ t h e P C e 7 e r c i s e s ? d e v a "a n i e $ e v a t i o n s . =es? %ou can deve$op the "usc$e contro$ to raise and $o(er %our ba$$s. E7cept for just another pecu$iar (a% to strengthen and tone %our PC? (h% do %ou care= ou care becaus e %o ur deva "ani e$evate before %ou can ej acu$ate. =ou canA t f i r e a g u n i f t h e h a " "e r i s n A t c o c k e d ? r i g h t - 2 o i f %o u h a v e t h e "a s t e r % t o $ o ( e r %o u r t e s t i c $ e s c o n s c i o u s $ %? %o u p r e v e n t o r d e $ a % ( h a t u s e d t o s e e " inevitab$e. 4eva"ani e$evations "a% see" difficu$t at first so %ouA$$ probab$% be using a$$ of %o u r P C ? f r o n t a n d b a c k ? i n a d d i t i o n t o %o u r a b d o " i n a $ " u s c $ e s . T r % t h i s practice (hi$e standing (ith %our feet shou$der (idth apart. Or %ou can sit on the edge of a bed or coffee tab$e (hi$e practicing. ItAs easier in the sitting

68

position to cup the botto" of %our ba$$s or "ake a thu"b9forefinger ring above %our testic$es so %ou can fee$ the" "oving s$ight$%. B egin b% doing a coup$e of sets of 2) per da%? (orking up to 8 each ti"e. ItAs a$so interesting to practice (ith a shiva $inga" Ban erectionC. One e7pert even reco""ends practicing bouncing a to(e$. That (ou$d be a great trick to sho( off at cocktai$ parties? donAt %ou agree.hen %our deva"ani are e$evating and dropping easi$%? add PC ;$utters. E+ercise* )C 1lutters T hi s e7 er ci s e is bas ic a$ $ % t he s a"e as th e f ir s t on e? P C ; $ e7 es ? j us t f as t er . T o d o f $ u t t e r s ? %o u c o n t r a c t a n d r e $ a 7 %o u r P C a s f a s t a s %o u c a n . + t f i r s t ? %o u "a % not be ab$e to go "uch fas ter than %o ur heartbeat? but ( ith practice %ou can speed up the sEuee5e and re$eas e. I s uggest %ou donAt count thes e but just ( ork up to f$uttering for s evera$ nor"a$ breaths before re$a7ing tota$$ %. 4 oing 2) s ets of thes e t( ice a da% shou$d be great. .hen %ou can f$utter $ike a bird? add PC C$a"ps. E+ercise* )C Clam,s PC C$a"ps are si"p$% $ong c$enches. .ork up to ho$ding %our c$ench for t(o "in u t es or "o re 2 ) t i "es ea ch s et . 6e "e "b er t o r e$ a7 co "p $ e t e$ % at $ en gt h bet(een these $ong c$a"ps. +nd re$a7 if %ou start to hurt or get sore. This can be a ver% intensive regi"en if %ou go fu$$ out. I suggest going s$o($% ( hi$e fee$ing %ou r (a % as %ou continue on ( ith $ater e7ercis es . Once %ou deve$op s trength and tone in %ou r P C after s o"e ( eeks of practice? %ou can back off to a "aintenance $eve$ of e7ercises. +fter a coup$e %ears of intense practice? I donAt do ever% e7ercise ever% da%. Eventua$$% %ouA $$ deve$op the fee$ of (hatAs right to "ake %our PC strong and keep it there. ThereAs an even "ore e7tensive progra" of PC e7ercises on a ver% interesting "e "b e r s h i p ( e b s i t e c a $ $ e d P e n i $ e E n h a n c e "e n t . T h e % r e c o " "e n d h u n d r e d s per set and have other e7ercises to strengthen %our "usc$es and increase the

69

si5e of %our vajra. I havenAt done the $engthening regi"en but their c$ai"s and testi"onia$s are i"pressive. If %ou (ant "ore? check it out at Qhttp:O O (((.Peni$e;itness.co" R. .e$$? that ( raps up the 2 o$o E7ercis es Chapter. = ouA ve $earned to re$a7? be "ore sensitive? breathe? "ake sounds? "easure? and pu"p. =ou cou$d spend a fe( "on ths rea$$ % perfecting a$$ thes e foundations of O rgas " * as ter%. , opefu$$ % %o uA ve at $eas t s pent s evera$ ( eeks getting to (here %o u can app$ % these funda"enta$ ski$$s auto"atica$$%. /e7t? (eA$$ e"p$o% these e7act too$s to s t r e t c h t h e t i " e %o u c a n " a i n t a i n e 7 c i t e " e n t a n d $ e a r n t o s a v o r p $ e a s u r e (ithout (orr%ing too "uch about fa$$ing over the c$iff. I f %o u ha ve an in ti "a t e p ar tn er a nd h av en A t do ne it a$ re ad %? i tA s ti "e to r ep or t in. Brief$% e7p$ain (hat %ouAve practiced? ho( itAs "ade %ou fee$? and ho( %ou e7pect it (i$$ u$ti"ate$% change %our $ove"aking.

70

Chapter %: /olo 'aster$


.ith the basic e7ercises (e$$ in hand B%es? that (as a doub$e entendreC? %ouAre read% for 2o$o *aster%. This chapter is about $earning to sta% at the point of no return indefinite$%. Interested- I betG Chapter ' begins b% teaching peaking? ho( to go fro" 1 on the 1)9point arous a$ s ca$e s teep$% up to : or s o and back do( n again Euick$ % ( hi$e s e$f9 p$easuring. The second section is a series of both "odern and ancient ph%sica$ techniEues to interrupt ejacu$ation (hen %ou get too c$ose. ThatAs fo$$o(ed b% a series of pure$% Tantric e7ercises (hich teach se7ua$ breathing? a "ethod of using the four cornerstones of ecstas% to sti"u$ate and stabi$i5e %our p$easure. ;ina$$%? Chapter ' presents p$ateauing? ho( to "aintain a high $eve$ of arousa$ (hi$e continuing sti"u$ation. + s %o u " i g h t e 7 p e c t ? t h i s c h a p t e r i s p r i " a r i $ % c o n c e r n e d ( i t h t h e P s o f 6 + *P E6 9 pacing? peaking? and p$ateauing. Though the % be$ong "ore to E? energ% circu$ation? IAve thro(n in so"e breathing e7ercises before p$ateauing. B ecaus e the breath is s uch a vita$ force to channe$ s e7ua$ energ% a( a% fro" %ou r genita$s ? it rea$$ % is funda"enta $ to $earning to f$oat in the p$ateau of ecs tas % for $ong periods of ti"e. The sooner %ou incorporate that into %our practice? the better? if %ou ask "e. The directions for the fo$$o(ing e7ercises get right to the "eat of the "atter (ithout $ots of pre$i"inaries. Though I donAt specif% it each ti"e? IA" r e " i n d i n g %o u t o a $ ( a %s s e t u p a s a f e c o "f o r t a b $ e u n i n t e r r u p t e d s p a c e f o r p r a c t i c e ? u s e a p p r o p r i a t e b a c k g r o u n d " u s i c ? r e $ a 7 ? c $ e a r %o u r " i n d ? a n d breathe first. =ouA$$ re"e"ber? (onAt %ou-

%.1 Peaking
P e a k i n g i s a $ $ a b o u t $ e t t i n g %o u r e 7 c i t e " e n t r i s e t o a h i g h $ e v e $ a n d t h e n i""ediate$% drop back do(n. If %ou graphed %our arousa$? the $ine (ou$d $ook

71

$ i k e a "o u n t a i n c $ i "b e r s c a $ i n g a s t e e p "o u n t a i n p e a k ? s t e e p $ % u p a n d t h e n precipitous$% do(n. IA " going to s ho( %ou a spectru " of techniEues to sudden$ % reduce %o ur e 7c it e "e n t. O bv io us $ %? r e$ a7 at io n a nd fi ne $ %9 t un ed s e ns e s ar e e s s e nt ia $ t o $earning peaking. Breath (i$$ p$a% a big part? too. .eA$$ begin (ith stopping s t i " u $ a t i o n a $ t o g e t h e r j u s t b e f o r e : . : . T h e n %o u A $ $ $ e a r n h o ( t o d o r e d u c e vajraAs e7cite"ent $eve$ (ith subt$e changes in ho( %ouAre sti"u$ating %ourse$f. E +ercise* Sto, 88Start )ea# in g In 2top92 tart P eaking? %ouA $$ practice e7tending the ti"e %ou can s ti"u$ate %ou rs e$f ( ithout cu"ing. This e7ercis e ( i$$ be fa"i $iar becaus e it begins j us t $ i k e t h e 2 e $ f 9 P $ e a s u r i n g B % T h e / u "b e r s o n e %o u d i d i n t h e $ a s t c h a p t e r . + t first? ai" for 1 "inute practice sessions? "aintaining an erection (ithout ejacu$ating. =ouA$$ (ork up to !) "inutes of se$f9p$easure (ithout sEuirting b% r e p e a t e d e 7 e r c i s e s . E 7 p e r t s s a % i f %o u c a n k e e p i t u p B t h e c o c k r u b b i n g ? I " e a n C f o r ! ) " i n u t e s ? %o u c a n " a i n t a i n f o r " u c h $ o n g e r . / o " a t t e r h o ( sensitive %ou are? this is possib$e through practice. 1C 2e$f9p$easure vajra (ith a dr% hand unti$ %ou reach an arousa$ $eve$ of 0. 1 C I " " e d i a t e $ % s t o p a $ $ s t i " u $ a t i o n ? o p e n %o u r e %e s ( i d e ? r e $ a 7 a $ $ %o u r "us c$ es ? take s $o( deep s $o( breaths ? and ( ait unti$ %ou r e7cite"en t drops to '. 2C 6epeat B1C and B2C five "ore ti"es. 2C C ontinue the e7ercis e b% repeating thes e s teps up to an arous a$ $eve$ of &. .hen %ou reach the peak? (ait unti$ %ouAve dropped to 0 before continuing. !C C ontinue the e7ercis e b% repeating thes e s teps up to an arous a$ $eve$ of :. .hen %ou reach the peak? (ait unti$ %ouAve dropped to 8 before continuing. !C / o( e7tend %ou r p$eas ure s ta"ina us ing s topping and s tarting. + gain and again? p$easure vajra up to : and then stop for a "o"ent before continuing.

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8 C 6 e"e "b e r? if %o u s $ ip o ve r t he ed ge an d cu "? r e$ a7 an d e nj o % it . I tA s go od n e ( s t h a t %o u A r e p u s h i n g %o u r $ i "i t s . = o u "i g h t h a v e t o p r a c t i c e "a n % t i " e s t o d e v e $ o p t h e s e n s i t i v i t % a n d t i " i n g t h a t %o u ( a n t . B u t %o u c a n d o i t G O < ? no( that "% pep ta$k is over? pick up the e7ercise (here %ou $eft off. =ouA$$ probab$ % be $es s e7citab$e after a $itt$ e sEuirt s o deve$oping the s top9s tart ref$e7es shou$d be easier. 8 C . h e n %o u c a n " a i n t a i n s e $ f 9 p $ e a s u r i n g f o r ! ) " i n u t e s b % s t o p p i n g a n d s ta rt in g ( i th ou t c u"i ng ? r ep ea t B1 C th ro ug h B 0C ( it h a $ ub ri ca t ed ha nd . B6 ef er t o t he s ug ge s t io ns ab ou t $ ub ri ca t io n i n th e 2 e$ f9 P $e as ur in g 4 is co ve r % e7 er ci s e in section !.' in the "idd$e of the $ast chapter.C 2top92tart Peaking si"u$ates (hat %ouA$$ be doing soon (ith a partner. <eep practicing to stretch the ti"e %ou can enjo% p$easure $onger and $onger (ithout e7p$oding. Once %ou get the hang of it? %ou "a% (ant to practice getting c$oser and c$os er to :.:. I kno( ( hen IA ve practiced? IA d enj o% a $ong p$eas urab$e session up to and back do(n fro" the $o( :s. Then IAd push it? kno(ing IAd e ve nt ua $ $ % cu ". I tr ea te d t ha t a s "% re ( a rd f or a j ob ( e $$ d on e. 2 o $i te ra $ $ % sEuee5e ever% $ast drop of p$easure out of vajra. .hen %ou can p$easure vajra to high peaks (ith $ubrication for !) "inutes or "ore? "ove on to the ne7t e7ercise. E +erc is e* S ub tle Ad $u s tm en ts )ea# in g , opefu$$ % %o uA ve practiced 2 top9 2 tart P eaking enough that %o uA re deve$oping the confidence that %ou can back off (hen %ou need to. But (hat if %ouAre (ith a partner ( ho is s o e7cited that %o u donA t (ant to interrupt the f$o(- , ereA s (here 2ubt$e +djust"ents Peaking can he$p. /o(? %ouA$$ repeat the previous e 7 e r c i s e e 7 c e p t % o u A $ $ " a k e s " a $ $ c h a n g e s i n h o ( %o u A r e p $ e a s u r i n g v a j r a ins tead of stopping entire$ %. 2o"eti"es? "iss ing a s troke? s$o(ing a bit? or g $ i d i n g u p a n d d o ( n %o u r p $ e a s u r e s t i c k " o r e s h a $ $ o ( $ % ( i $ $ a $ $ o ( %o u t o "aintain %our arousa$ $eve$ (hen %ouAre "aking $ove. 1C 2e$f9p$easure vajra s$o($% up to 0 (ith a dr% hand.

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2 C I n s t e a d o f s t o p p i n g s t i " u $ a t i o n ? v a r % ( h a t %o u A r e d o i n g t o r e d u c e t h e e7cite"ent a fe( points Bfor e7a"p$e? fro" 0 do(n to 'C. 2$o( do(n or $ighten the pres s ure of %ou r s trokes . Change direction. If %o uA re on the head? "ove to the shaft. If %ouAve been enjo%ing $ong strokes? shorten the". !C ; o$$o( the s a"e regi "en as 2 top92 tart P eaking? repeating each s eries s i7 ti"es up to 0? &? and : or "ore. ' C / o ( e 7 t e n d %o u r p $ e a s u r e s t a " i n a u s i n g s u b t $ e a d j u s t "e n t s . + g a i n a n d again? p$easure vajra up to : and then interrupt the ascent for a "o"ent before continuing. C .hen %ou can continue p$eas uring vaj ra for !) "inu tes us ing s ubt$e a d j u s t " e n t s t o d r o p %o u r e 7 c i t e " e n t $ e v e $ a f e ( p o i n t s ? r e p e a t t h e ( h o $ e process (ith a $ubricated hand. 2ubt$e +djust"ents Peaking (i$$ co"e in hand% soon since %ouA$$ use it during i n t e r c o u r s e $ a t e r i n t h e p r o g r a ". Is i t o b v i o u s h o ( c r i t i c a $ t h e s e $ a s t t ( o e7ercis es are- * as ter the " co"p$e te$ % through repetition before "ov ing on. .hen can get to : and back off ( ithout s topping or cu"ing for !) "inut es ? %ouA r e read % to inc$ude the Tantric techniEues that fo$$o( . But before %ou do? take a "o"ent to appreciate %our progress. B% getting to this point? %ouAve transfor"ed %our se7ua$ pattern into one that a$read% c$ose$% rese"b$es the $ove"aking rea$it% %ou (ant to create. E+ercise* Breath )ea#ing 1 $ t i "a t e $ %? t h e 1 $ t i "a t e E c s t a t i c 2 o $ u t i o n i s a T a n t r i c p r o c e s s i n ( h i c h %o u bas k at high s tates of arous a$ circu$at ing s e7ua$ energ% throughout %o ur bod% and e7changing it (ith a partner. ThatAs (h% I reco""end %ou start practicing the energ%9oriented version of peaking here. Breath Peaking is one of the ke% subt$e "ethods of reducing %our e7cite"ent during $ove"aking. 2 ince (e a$$ t en d to b re at he th ro ug h th e "o ut h du ri ng o rg as "? %o u A r e go in g to s ( it ch t o nasa$ breathing here because itAs $ess arousing.

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1C 2 e$f9p$eas ure vaj ra s $o( $% up to 0 ( ith either a dr% or $ubricated hand? depending on ho( sensitive %ou fee$ and ho( (e$$ %ouAve done (ith previous "aster% e7ercises. 2C Instead of stopping sti"u$ation? s$o( do(n s$ight$%. Open %our e%es (ide? inha$e "or e deep$ % into the be$$ %? but this ti"e through the /O 2 E? and ho$d %our breath. 1C 6e$a7 co"p$ete$% as %ou e7ha$e? visua$i5ing %our se7ua$ fire strea"ing out of vajra? and "oaning (ith p$easure to re$ease energ%. 2C Inha$e again through the nose? visua$i5ing p$easure energ% "oving up vajra through %our pe$vis to %our heart or even higher. !C C an %ou fee$ %our e7cite"ent $es sen si"p$ % b% s$o(ing %our breath- P $a% ( ith it unti$ %ou can? us ing s top9start and subt$e adj us t"ents as needed. !C ;o$$o( the sa"e regi"en as (ith the peaking e7ercises? repeating each series si7 ti"es up to 0? &? and : or "ore. 'C +$ternative$%? so"e peop$e report that fast panting re$eases energ% sudden$%. Tr% it. C +s %ou practice and get c$oser and c$oser to cu"ing? see if %ou can back %our e7cite"ent off just b% s$o(ing and deepening %our breath through the nose.

%.2 Interrupting E aculation


In this section IAve co$$ected both ancient and "odern techniEues that %ou can use to interrupt ejacu$ation (hen %ou get too c$ose to :.:. IAve inc$uded this in t h e s p i r i t o f c o "p $ e t e n e s s ? k n o ( i n g s o "e t h i n g s ( o r k b e t t e r f o r s o "e g u %s than others . O <? this rea$$ % is a confes s ion. Though IA " good at the other e 7e rc is es i n th is b oo k? IA " n ot ve r % g oo d a t th es e in te rr up ti on t ec hn iE ue s . *a%be I havenAt practiced the" enough because the%Are not essentia$$% Tantric. Tantra sa%s donA t resist things ? f$o( (ith the energ% thatAs rising? and enjo% it. I a$(a%s tr% to put "%se$f in a position (here I donAt have to concentrate on

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s topping an%th ing. 2o "a %be "% heart has nA t been in it (hen practicing thes e e7ercises. ThatAs probab$% the $ousiest pep ta$k %ouAve ever heard. In spite of that? I (ant %ou to tr% a$$ of the". +$$ %ouAve got to (aste is a $itt$e sper"? right- These "ethods rea$$% are different versions of the stop9and9start "ethod (e did in the peaking s ection. IA " hoping that one or "or e ( i$$ (ork rea$$ % (e$$ for %ou s o %ou can add too$s to %our $ove"aking arsena$. IAve presented the" as separate e7ercises? but fee$ free to tr% severa$ of the" at once if that (orks for %ou. E+ercise* )erineum )ress The perineu" is the part of %our pe$vic f$oor bet(een %our deva"ani and anus. Be$o( the base of vajra? thereAs a soft spot through (hich %ou can app$% pres s ure to %ou r pros tate. >ogica$ $ %? ( e ca$$ the e7terna$ pros tate s pot the P ros tate P oint. 2 ince "% shiva $inga" BerectionC e7tends a$"ost to "% rosetta? " % P r o s t a t e P o i n t i s v e r % n e a r " % a n u s . B u t t h a t A s n o t t h e c a s e f o r e v e r %o n e . I f %o u d o n A t k n o ( ( h e r e %o u r s i s ? t a k e a $ i t t $ e b r e a k n o ( a n d s e a r c h f o r t h e $itt$e indentation do(n there that has $ess resistance to pushing in and up. It shou$d fee$ good deep inside (hen %ou find it and press hard. BThatAs ( h% this is ca$$ed a hands9on progra".C 2o"e ca$$ the prostate the "a$e eEuiva$ent of a (o"anAs 3 spot. ,ave %ou ever h a d a n e r o t i c p r o s t a t e " a s s a g e e i t h e r e 7 t e r n a $ $ % o r t h r o u g h %o u r r o s e t t a Though the interna$ variet % takes so"e h%gi ene precautions $ike i""e dia te finger disinfecting or use of rubber g$oves? the p$easure it gives can be incredib$e once $earned. B% the (a%? IA" in no (a% ta$king about those insensitive e7a"s doctors give? shoving their finger up their to check the si5e of %our prostate. O c c a s i o n a $ f i r " r h %t h " i c p u $ s i n g p r e s s u r e o n %o u r P r o s t a t e P o i n t c a n b e high$% p$easurab$e if app$ied (ith ski$$ and sensitivit%. 2troking vajra and %our 3 9 s p o t a t t h e s a " e t i " e c a n b e i n c r e d i b $ e ? $ e n g t h e n i n g a n d i n t e n s i f %i n g a $ $ kinds of orgas"s? especia$$% the e7p$osive ones. 2o"e sa% prostate "assage is g o o d f o r %o u r h e a $ t h t o o ? b u t o u r " a i n c o n c e r n h e r e i s h o ( t o i n t e r r u p t sEuirting. ;ortunate$%? it he$ps (ith that? too.

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P ros tate s ti"u$ ation is reported to reduce %o ur $ike$ihood of e7p$oding invo$untari $ % s ince it purges the g$and of the f$uid neces s ar % for e"is s ion. If %ou pus h hard on %ou r Pros tate P oint right before the point of no return? it b$ocks the e"ission phase. The Perineu" Press prevents se"ina$ f$uid fro" entering the urethra$ cana$ (hen the spas"s start. Even if %ou have orgas"ic contract ions ? the s e"en re"ains and is reabs orbed. This is a great ( a % to e7perience dr% orgas"? p$easurab$e contractions (ithout ejacu$ating. But $ook out? if %ou sti"u$ate %our prostate? %our anus? the buried base of vajra? or %our deva "ani too $ate? it can pus h %ou over the edge. ThatA s e7act$ % ( hat I did recent$% (hen I (as practicing this techniEue (hi$e (riting this book. 1C 2e$f9p$easure vajra using a dr% or $ubricated hand as %ou prefer. 1C .hen %ou reach 0? s top a$$ "o tion? $ocate %o ur P ros tate P oint? and pres s u p ( a r d f i r " $ % i n o n e s t e a d % " o t i o n f o r 1 ) t o ! ) s e c o n d s o r u n t i $ %o u d r o p do(n a fe( arousa$ points. 2 C . h e n %o u r e 7 c i t e " e n t d r o p s ? c o n t i n u e s e $ f 9 p $ e a s u r i n g u p t o & ? s t o p ? a n d press again. !C 6epeat the e7ercise up to & again. This ti"e? ho(ever? see if %ou can continue stroking (hi$e pressing on the point and having %our arousa$ drop. 2C <eep practicing the e7ercise using the Perineu" Press? seeing ho( c$ose %ou can get to :.: and sti$$ back off. !C If %ou havenAt s$ipped over the edge and cu" %et? p$easure %ourse$f up to :.: and see if %ou can interrupt the e"ission phase just before it starts using the Perineu" Press. .ith a $itt$e $uck and repeated practice? %ou shou$d be ab$e to e7perience dr% o r g a s "s ( i t h t h i s t e c h n i E u e . B u t n e v e r f e a r i f t h e k n a c k e $ u d e s %o u . T h e energ % e7ercis es %ou A $$ $earn $ater are high$ % effective in teaching "en to e7perience "u$tip$e orgas"s.

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E+ercise* )C S9uee:e Once %ouAve strengthened %our PC "usc$e through severa$ (eeks of c a $ i s t h e n i c s ? %o u h a v e a " o r e c o n v e n i e n t ( a % o f i n t e r r u p t i n g e j a c u $ a t i o n . ThatA s ( hat I us ed in the s tor% at the beginning of Chapter 1. Tightening %o ur PC fir"$% has a si"i$ar effect on %our prostate to the perineu" push. ItAs $ike putting on the car brakes (hen %ou find %o urs e $f on the verge of s $iding over o ne o f t ho s e re a$ $ % s t ee p 2 a n ; ra nc is co r es id en ti a $ s t re et s . . he n %o u "as te r PC 2Euee5es? %ouA$$ have another "ethod? a ver% p$easurab$e one? to peak %our e7cite"ent $eve$. +nd itAs $ess obtrusive to use (hi$e %ouAre "aking $ove. 1C To (ar" up before sti"u$ating vajra? do !) PC pu"ps to tone %our "usc$es a nd "a s s ag e %o u r p ro s t at e. B 2 o "e be $i ev e t hi s in te rn a$ "a s s ag e a $$ b % it s e $f can de$a% ejacu$ator% spas"s fro" s(eeping over %ou Euick$%.C 2C 2e$f9p$easure vajra using a dr% or $ubricated hand as %ou prefer. 1C .hen %o u reach 0? s top a$$ "o tion? ho$d %o ur breath ( ith %o ur e%es ( ide o p e n ? a n d c $ a " p d o ( n a s t i g h t a s %o u c a n o n %o u r P C " u s c $ e u n t i $ %o u r arousa$ subsides severa$ points. 2C 2 ti "u$at e %ou rs e$f again up to 0? but this ti "e pu"p %o ur P C repeated$ % ( h i $ e %o u c o n t i n u e s t r o k i n g . 4 o t h e s e p u " p s e 7 c i t e %o u " o r e ? o r d o t h e % spread the energ%- This e7peri"ent (i$$ he$p %ou choose %our preferred PC pu"ping techniEue. !C 6epeat the se$f9p$easuring? continuing this ti"e unti$ %ou reach &. 1se one $ong hard s Euee5e? t( o "ediu" sEuee5es ? or s evera$ Euick P C s Euee5es 9 (hichever (orks best for %ou to reduce %our e7cite"ent. 'C <eep practicing the e7ercise using the PC 2Euee5e? seeing ho( c$ose %ou can get to :.: and sti$$ back off. 8C If %ou havenAt s$ipped over the edge and cu" %et? p$easure %ourse$f up to :.: and see if %ou can interrupt the e"is s ion phas e j us t before it s tarts us ing the PC 2Euee5e.

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E +erc is e* ( oot 6oc# + branch of Chinese Taois" offers "an% "ethods of spiritua$ and energetic se7ua$it% (hich are si"i$ar to Tantra. + po(erfu$ one is the 6oot >ock? (hich rese"b$es the PC 2Euee5e in so"e (a%s. To perfor" a 6oot >ock? ho$d %our breath "o"entari$% and push %our pe$vic " u s c $ e s o u t $ i k e s t r a i n i n g t o e " p t % %o u r b o ( e $ s . + n c i e n t T i b e t a n s c a $ $ i t c $ o s i n g t h e $ o ( e r g a t e . T h e % a d v i s e %o u t o t i g h t e n %o u r r o s e t t a ? t u r n %o u r t o n g u e a n d e %e s u p ( a r d ? c o n t r a c t t h e j o i n t s o f %o u r f e e t a n d h a n d s ? t i g h t e n %o u r f i n g e r s s t r o n g $ %? a n d p u $ $ i n %o u r s t o " a c h t o t h e b a c k b o n e . = o g a a d d s that (hi$e e7pe$$ing the breath through %our nose? contract %our ana$ "usc$es dra(ing the" in(ard and up(ard. The% a$$ (ork together? e7cept so"e sa% push out and others sa% pu$$ in. >etAs tr% it both (a%s. 1C 2e$f9p$easure vajra using a dr% or $ubricated hand as %ou prefer. 1 C . h e n %o u r e a c h 0 ? s t o p a $ $ " o t i o n a n d d o a 6 o o t > o c k . E 7 p e $ a $ $ %o u r b r e a t h a n d h o $ d i t ? k e e p %o u r e %e s ( i d e o p e n $ o o k i n g u p ( a r d ? p u s h %o u r t o n g u e o n t h e r o o f o f %o u r "o u t h ? t i g h t e n %o u r f i n g e r s ? h a n d s ? a n d f e e t ? a n d push out on %our rosetta unti$ %our arousa$ subsides severa$ points. 2 C 2 t i " u $ a t e %o u r s e $ f a g a i n u p t o 0 ? d o a n o t h e r 6 o o t > o c k ? b u t t h i s t i " e contract %ou r ana$ "us c$es in( ard and up( ard ( hi$e pu$$ing %o ur s to"ach to(ard %our spine. .hich (orks better for %ou? in or out2 C 6 ep ea t th e s e$ f9 p $e as ur in g? c on ti nu in g th is ti "e u nt i$ %o u r ea ch & ? an d th en do %our preferred 6oot >ock. !C <eep practicing the e7ercise using 6oot >ocks? seeing ho( c$ose %ou can get to :.: and sti$$ back off. 'C If %ou havenAt s$ipped over the edge and cu" %et? p$easure %ourse$f up to :.: and see if %ou can interrupt the e"is s ion phas e j us t before it s tarts us ing the 6oot >ock.

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E+ercise* Va$ra S9uee:e IA" sure %ouAre a(are that (hen %ou get sti"u$ated? b$ood f$o(s into vajra and causes a shiva $inga" Ban erectionC. If %ou sEuee5e in the right p$ace? %ou can force b$ood out of vaj ra and reduce the erection. This he$ps "an % "en de$a % their e7p$osive orgas"s. If %ou do a @aj ra 2 Euee5e jus t before the point of c$i "a7? e7perts report that %ou can ess entia$ $ % cance$ the orgas ". 2 o"e reco ""end the tip? s o"e the "idd$e? and others the base. +gain? I think itAs (orth(hi$e to practice ever %t hi ng to s ee ( hat ( orks bes t for %o u. I jus t canA t figure out ho( to reach the tip or "idd$e easi$% (hen IA" stroking inside a %oni. 1C 2e$f9p$easure vajra using a dr% or $ubricated hand as %ou prefer. 1C .hen %ou reach 0? s top a$$ "otion and sEuee5e %our ;6E/1 >1* behind vajraAs cro(n and under his head? using %our thu"b and forefinger? unti$ %our arousa$ subsides severa$ points. This can take fro" 1) to !) seconds. 2C 2ti"u$ate %ourse$f again up to 0? this ti"e sEuee5ing the *I44>E of vajra (ith %our thu"b and inde7 finger. !C 2ti"u$ate %ourse$f again up to 0? this ti"e sEuee5ing the TIP of vajra (ith %our thu"b and inde7 finger. .hich (orks better for %ou2 C 6 ep ea t th e s e$ f9 p $e as ur in g? c on ti nu in g th is ti "e u nt i$ %o u r ea ch & ? an d th en do %our preferred "ethod of @ajra 2Euee5e. !C <eep practicing the e7ercise using @ajra 2Euee5es? seeing ho( c$ose %ou can get to :.: and sti$$ back off. 8C If %ou havenAt s$ipped over the edge and cu" %et? p$easure %ourse$f up to :.: a n d s e e i f %o u c a n i n t e r r u p t t h e e " i s s i o n p h a s e j u s t b e f o r e i t s t a r t s u s i n g a @ajra 2Euee5e.

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E +ercis e* 7 evam an i )u ll . h e n %o u e j a c u $ a t e ? %o u r d e v a "a n i B b a $ $ s C e $ e v a t e o r "o v e u p c $ o s e t o %o u r bod% as %o ur s crotu" tightens . I think this app$ies the press ure to the s per" reservoir that responds to the contractions around the prostate. .hat do %ou think (ou$d happen if %our testic$es didnAt e$evate- 6ight? %ou (ou$dnAt sEuirt. ThatAs the theor% of the 4eva"ani Pu$$. 1C 2e$f9p$easure vajra using a dr% or $ubricated hand as %ou prefer. 1 C . h e n %o u r e a c h 0 ? s t o p a $ $ " o t i o n a n d h o $ d v a j r a i n o n e h a n d . . i t h t h e ot he r h an d? "a ke a r in g ( it h %o u r t hu "b a nd f or ef in ge r ab ov e %o u r de va "an i and pu$$ do(n fir"$%. Be carefu$ not to sEuee5e %our testic$es. .ait unti$ %our arousa$ subsides? (hich can take fro" 1) to !) seconds. 2C 2 ti"u$ ate %o urs e$f again up to 0? this ti "e gras ping %o ur s crotu" bet( een %our deva"ani (ith %our thu"b and forefinger and pu$$ing do(n fir"$%. 4oes this (ork better than the ring "ethod!C 2 e$f9p$eas ure again up to 0. .hen %ou s top this ti "e? s ee if %o u can c o n s c i o u s $ % r e $ a 7 % o u r e n t i r e g e n i t a $ r e g i o n a n d d e $ i b e r a t e $ % $ o ( e r %o u r deva"ani a( a% fro" %ou bod%. Can %ou reduce %our e7cite"ent $eve$ pure$% (ith "usc$e contro$ this (a%2C 6 e pe at t he s e $f 9 p$ ea s u ri ng ? co nt in ui ng t hi s t i "e un ti $ %o u re ac h &? a nd t he n do %our preferred "ethod of 4eva"ani Pu$$. !C <eep practicing the e7ercise using 4eva"ani Pu$$s? seeing ho( c$ose %ou can get to :.: and sti$$ back off. 8C If %ou havenAt s$ipped over the edge and cu" %et? p$easure %ourse$f up to :.: and see if %ou can interrupt the e"ission phase just before it starts using a 4eva"ani Pu$$. *an% Taoist techniEues are based on Chinese "edicine? (hich (orks (ith energ% $ike acupuncture. The% c$ai" that %ou can avoid ejacu$ation b% c$osing

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t h e " o u t h ? r o $ $ i n g t h e e %e s $ e f t a n d r i g h t ? h o $ d i n g t h e b r e a t h ? g n a s h i n g t h e teeth? "oving the hands up and do(n? and pressing the Ping9I acupoint one inch above the right nipp$e ( ith the inde7 and "idd$ e finger of $eft hand. It see"s to he$p "e? but then "a%be itAs just distracting "e "o"entari$%. The <a"a 2utra? the fa"ous Indian $ove guide? a$so suggests a potent re te nt io n te ch ni Eu e in ( h ic h %o u r pa rt ne r s $a ps %o u r bu tt a nd ch es t ( i th a n open pa$". This is a hard one to practice on %ourse$f? I think? but heck? give it a tr% if %ou (ant. ,opefu$$% b% a$$ this stroking? %ouAve found so"e "ethods that %ou can use in e"ergenc% situations. If not? I hope %ouAve had $ots of fun and fine9tuned %our judg"ent of %our arousa$ $eve$s. +n%(a%? if %ou ask "e? the energ% re$ated practices (hich fo$$o( are "uch "ore po(erfu$.

%.! /e4ual Breathing


Th is s e ct io n t ea ch es %o u t o co "b i ne "an % of th in gs %o u a$ re ad % k no ( h o( t o do in a (a% that prope$s the "ove"ent of orgas"ic energ% in %our bod%. .eAre so$id$% in the E ca"p of 6+*PE6 no(? the rea$" of energ% circu$ation. 2 e 7 u a $ B r e a t h i n g i s t h e k i n d o f b r e a t h ? s o u n d ? "o v e "e n t ? a n d "e n t a $ f o c u s that happens (hen the average person has a t%pica$ e7citing e7p$osive orgas". .eAre going to practice these too$s (ithout se7 for the "ost part so %ou can deve$op "as ter % over thos e bod%O "i nd functions that happen invo$untari$ % d u r i n g a c $ i " a 7 . . h e n %o u c a n u s e t h e " t o t u r n %o u r s e $ f o n ? %o u c a n u s e the" to turn %ourse$f off? too. 4oesnAt that "ake sense; or the "os t part? ( eA $$ be dea$ing here ( ith s ubt$e energies . + t firs t? donA t e7pect that %ouA$$ be f$ipping one of those big high9vo$tage contro$ $evers (ith huge sparks that (i$$ thro( %our bod% across the roo". 6ight a(a%? if %ouAre ver% re$a7ed and sensitive? or hopefu$$% soon through practice? %ouA$$ beco"e a ( a r e o f a $ i t t $ e ( a r "t h ? e $ e c t r i c a $ t i n g $ e ? o r p $ e a s u r a b $ e t i c k $ e . I t A s $ i k e $ e a r n i n g t o t u n e i n t o a "u c h h i g h e r f r e E u e n c % s o u n d t h a n %o u A r e a c c u s t o " e d to. =ouA ve got to c$ear %our "ind and $is ten acute$% to reach it. Once %ou $earn to tune %our receiver to subt$e se7ua$ energ%? it beco"es a po(erfu$ force. =ou

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can direct and regu$ate it for "agnified passion? $ighting a s$o( burn instead of an over(he$"ing eruption. C an %o u unders tand ho( an% "ent a$ or ph %s ica $ tens ion can prevent %ou r progress at this stage- =ou can force %our (a% around so$id obstac$es (ith the "as cu $ine force of ( i$$. But to us e s ubt$e energ % %o u have to re$a7? breathe? and fee$ ever% $itt$e sensation. Tension (i$$ b$ock the door(a% to fee$ing and "oving these energies. I f %o u r e $ a 7 ? d o n A t ( o r r % a b o u t h o ( f a s t %o u g o ? a n d n e v e r d e s p a i r ( h e n i t takes $onger than %ou think it shou$d? soon %ouA$$ get ink$ings? then surges? and fina$$ % ( aves that ( i$$ bo( $ %ou over. Be patient. = ouA $$ probab$ % need to practice nu"erous ti"es for severa$ (eeks before the "agic (i$$ occur. 2 e7ua$ B reathing "a % not appear to be direct$ % dea$ing ( ith vaj ra and his Euickness on the dra(. But itAs an essentia$ part of %ou putting a$$ the pieces together (ith this progra". The success of 6+*PE6 depends on %our abi$it% to distribute throughout %our bod% the intense se7ua$ energ% that natura$$% c o $ $ e c t s i n v a j r a . . h e n %o u s i " u $ a t e t h e p h %s i c a $ a n d "e n t a $ c o n d i t i o n s o f o r g a s " t h r o u g h t h i s p r a c t i c e ? %o u A $ $ r e a $ $ % h a v e a $ e g u p o n e j a c u $ a t i o n "aster%. E+ercise* Breathing 0 )um,ing = o u k n o ( h o ( t o b r e a t h e p r o p e r $ % a n d p u " p %o u r P C a $ r e a d %. / o ( ( e A r e going to co"bine these too$s. =ouA$$ (ant to do a$$ these energ% e7ercises n a k e d o r ( i t h $ o o s e c $ o t h i n g . ; i n d a E u i e t u n i n t e r r u p t e d s p a c e ( h e r e %o u ( o n A t b e i n t e r r u p t e d . P $ a % s o " e s u i t a b $ e s $ o ( s e n s u o u s r h %t h " i c " u s i c . O n e of our favorites is e$9 , adra Bavai$ab $e co""er cia $$ % through our ( ebs ite but an% s$o( trance% h%pnotic instru"enta$ that turns %ou on (i$$ (ork fine. 1C 4o this e7ercise $%ing do(n? standing (ith $oose knees? sitting on a chair? or s i t t i n g o n a p i $ $ o ( . T h e i d e a $ p o s i t i o n i s o n a 5 a f u ? a D a p a n e s e "e d i t a t i o n pi$$o( thatA s round? so$id? and f$atten ed top and botto ". If %ou can i"agin e sEuashing a ba$$ of ha"burger "eat (ith %our pa$"? %ouA$$ recogni5e one (hen %ou see it.

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2C C $os e %o ur e %e s and breathe deep$ % and s $o( $% in the be$$%. The "ore air %o u take in rh%th "i ca $$ %? the "ore energ % %o uA $ $ be generating. I find it he$ps "e to pucker "% "outh on the inbreath so I can hear the air rushing in. The co"p$ete Tantric breath has four stages: in? pause? out? pause. Pause for a distinct "o"ent bet(een inha$ing and e7ha$ing? and e7ha$ing and inha$ing. !C +fter a fe( "inutes of fee$ing c$eansed? re$a7ed? and refreshed through breathing? begin c$enching %our PC on %our inha$e. 6e$a7 %our PC a$ong (ith ever%thing e$se as %ou e7ha$e. 2C 4o %ou fee$ an % sens ations fro" breathing and pu"p ing together- In %ou r vajra? genita$s? or e$se(here- Tune in and see if there are an% subt$e signa$s. 'C Once %ouAve coordinated breathing and pu"ping? begin "aking sounds on %o ur e7ha$e. = ou can s i"p$ % s a% FahhhF as %o u $et the air es cape. Or %ou can use the other vo(e$s BFeeeeF? FiiiiF? FohF? FooooFC to e7press an% sensations %ouAre fee$ing. If this is s ti$$ a( k( ard? pus h %ou rs e$f to be $ouder and $ouder for a (hi$e. Then (hen %ou $o(er the vo$u"e it (i$$ fee$ "ore co"fortab$e. E+ercise* Visuali:ing Energy / e7t (eA re going to add the vis ua$i5a tion of energ % a$ong ( ith %ou r breathing a n d p u " p i n g . 2 i n c e e n e r g % f $ o ( s ( h e r e a t t e n t i o n g o e s ? e v e n i f %o u j u s t i"agine se7ua$ juice and e$ectricit% so"e(here in %our bod%? so"ething (i$$ eventua$$% happen. =ou a$read% kne( that the "ind (as the biggest se7 organ? r i g h t - / o( ( e A r e g o i n g t o c a p i t a $ i 5 e o n i t ? f o c u s i n g %o u r b i g h e a d ( h e r e i t be$ongs? on creating p$easure. .eAre going to begin (orking (ith %our energ% centers? chakras? in a big (a%. These are the vortices (here energ% tends to co$$ect and s(ir$ around at different p$aces ins ide %our bod%. To re"ind %ou? hereA s the tab$e %ou sa( in Chapter 2... N 1st >ocation Perineu" Bbase of spineC ;unction 2e7? surviva$

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2nd !rd 'th th 0th 8th

Be$$% B2 inches be$o( nave$C 2o$ar P$e7us ,eart Throat ;orehead B!rd e%eC Cro(n Btop of headC

Bod%? sensations Po(er? (i$$ >ove? co"passion Creativit%? e7pression Perception. consciousness 4ivine connection

= o u i n n e r f $ u t e i s t h e e n e r g % c h a n n e $ n e a r %o u r s p i n e t h a t c o n n e c t s %o u r c ha kr as . T he vi s u a$ i5 at i on s of t hi s e 7e rc is e ( i $$ be gi n op en in g t ha t s ub t$ e conduit and f$o(ing energ% bet(een the chakras. 1 C + s s u"e a s i "i $ ar co "f or t a b$ e pos it io n as i n t he pr ev io us e 7e rc is e. 1 pr ig ht is probab$% better for visua$i5ing rising and fa$$ing subt$e energ%. 2C Begin Breathing and Pu"ping again (ith e%es c$osed unti$ %ou sett$e into a rh%th". !C 6 es t one hand gent$% on %ou r genita$s ? as if crad$ing a precious j e( e$. This isnAt designed for se$f9p$easuring? just as an anchor for "oving energ%. But if it turns %ou on? so "uch the better. 'C +s %ou breathe in s$o($%? visua$i5e the air entering through %our first chakra at the base of %our pe$vis. Though %our e%es are c$osed to contain %our energ% i ns id e? $o ok do( n( ar d as %o u d o th is . I "a gi n e t he ai r i s a f ie r % s t re a " o f orgas"ic energ%. C +fter ho$ding %our breath for 1) seconds or so? as %ou e7ha$e? visua$i5e the strea" of energ% f$o(ing out the sa"e (a% it ca"e in. 6e$a7 co"p$ete$% for a "o"ent before %our ne7t breath. 6epeat this c%c$e severa$ ti"es. 1C /o( on %our inbreath? visua$i5e the energ% entering %our first chakra and " o v i n g u p %o u r i n n e r f $ u t e i n t o %o u r b e $ $ %? %o u r s e c o n d c h a k r a . + s %o u breathe? us e %ou r other hand on %ou r s kin or f$oating j us t above %ou r bod % to trace the energ% f$o( %ou A re vis ua$i5ing in %o ur "indA s e%e. In other ( ords ? "ove the hand gent$ % up fro" %o ur genita$s to %o ur be$$ % as %ou breathe in? reversing it do(n(ards on %our outbreath. +s before? focus %our e%es

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i n t e r n a $ $ % ( h e r e %o u A r e v i s u a $ i 5 i n g ? h o $ d %o u r b r e a t h ? a n d e 7 h a $ e d o( n %o u r inner f$ute and out the first chakra. 6epeat this a fe( ti"es. 0C 6epeat the seEuence a fe( ti"es each for the third through seventh chakras. I"agine %ou r breath "oving fro" the firs t to the third? then the firs t to the fourth? and so on. In each case? picture the energ% f$o(ing fro" the first chakra to the upper chakra through %our inner f$ute. 0C 4uring this process? i"agine that %ouAre e7periencing intense$% passionate $ove"ak ing? "ak ing %ou r bod % "ove? %o ur pu$s e Euicken? and %ou r s ounds e"anate fro" deep inside %our reservoir of $ife force. +nd re"e"ber to keep a$$ %o u r s e ns e s o pe n. I f %o u fe e$ a n % s ens at io ns ? no "a t t er h o( s ub t$ e? vi s u a$ i5 e %o ur breath pass ing through ( here %o u fee$ the ". In this ( a %? the breath acts $ike adding fue$ to a s"a$$ fire? "aking it f$are up. Even if %ou donAt fee$ "uch? i"agine that %ou do and breathe into the bod% parts %ou (ant to energi5e. E+ercise* )elvic (oc#ing The four cornerstones of ecstas% inc$ude "ove"ent. PC pu"ps are po(erfu$ interna$ "otions? but (e need to inc$ude the rest of %our bod%. If %ouAve ever e7 pe ri en ce d a fu $$ b od % o rg as " ( he re %o u ( ri th e? un du $a te ? a nd v ib ra te a$ $ o v e r ? %o u A $ $ k n o ( ( h a t I " e a n . + n d i f %o u h a v e n A t ? b o %? h a v e %o u g o t so"ething to $ook for(ard to. Pe$vic 6ocking is a rotation of %our pe$vic area. 2o"e have $ikened it to riding a horse? but I prefer to co"pare it to a s$o( deep fuck (hen %ouAre on top. .ith %our (eight on %our knees and hands? the on$% (a% %ou can penetrate deep$% is b% either doing pus h9ups or b% rocking %ou r pe$vis for( ards and back( ards . The $atter is (hat (eAre adding to %our repertoire here. .e $ike to practice pe$vic rocking s$o($% (ith pri"itive "usic $ike dru"s or +frican rh%th"s. 1C To get the fee$ of Pe$vic 6ocking? first tr% bouncing. >ie on %our sto"ach and r a i s e %o u r h i p s u p a n d d o ( n E u i c k $ %. + b o u t t h e o n $ % ( a % t o d o t h i s i s b % rotating %our hips. ThatAs the "otion (eAre ai"ing for.

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2C <nee$ on %our knees on a 5afu turned on its side (ith %our feet behind %ou? D a p a n e s e s t %$ e . I f %o u d o n A t h a v e o n e a n d c a n A t "a k e t h e p os i t i o n ( o r k ( i t h pi$$o(s at hand? %ou can tr% it standing? $a%ing do(n? or on the edge of a chair. If %ou have to use an a$ternate position? %ouA$$ unfortunate$% "iss the perineu" rubbing that so"e of us $ove so "uch. !C To begin? rotate %our pe$vis for(ard and back? rubbing %our perineu" $ight$% on the pi$$o(. The rubbing just fee$s good and isnAt essentia$ to $oosen up %our $o(er region. 2C B e s ure to keep %ou r tors o and s hou$ders s tead %? j us t rocking %ou r hips for( ard and back( ards . To te$$ if %ou A re rotating ins tead of j us t "oving? put %our hands on %our hips pointing do( n. If the ang$e of %our fingers re$ative to the f$oor dips for(ards and back(ards? %ouAve got it. 'C 6e"e"ber to keep sensing (hat %ouAre fee$ing inside. >et subt$e p$easurab$e f e e $ i n g s t u r n i n t o s o u n d . T h e s e e 7 e r c i s e s c a n r e p r o g r a " %o u r n e r v o u s s %s t e " t o a c c e p t a n d r e j o i c e f r o " p $ e a s u r e i f %o u $ e t t h e " . B u t t h e %A r e n o t s u p p o s e d to be strenuous ca$isthenics. ItAs "ore $ike "i$d =oga to $oosen %ou up so %our energ% channe$s are freer. C +fter practicing for a fe( "inutes? $et the rocking spread up %our bod% $ike a (ave. I"agine %ou have the bod% of a snake so that %our hip rocking "oves up(ards in an undu$ating (ave. 0C +dd in the PC pu"p no(. 2Euee5e in one direction of rocking? re$a7 in the other. 4ue to %our bri$$iant po(ers of observation? %ouAve probab$% recogni5ed that thereA s t( o ( a%s to do it: pu"p as %ou rock for( ard or pu"p as %ou rock back. .hich do %ou $ike betterE+ercise* Se+ual Breathing O<? dude. /o( %ouAve tried a$$ the separate pieces of 2e7ua$ Breathing... 4eep be$$% breathing through the "outh? Pe$vic rocking?

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PC pu"ping on the inha$e? * aking sens ua$ sounds that e7pres s p$eas ure? and @isua$i5ing energ% "oving up and do(n %our inner f$ute. IA ve broken the " do( n into defined s teps s o %ou cou$d get co"fortab $e ( ith each one separate$%. But rea$$%? once %ou $earn to coordinate the" a$$? 2e7ua$ Breathing is just doing one unified thing. *ost peop$e do these things natura$$% together during ecstatic se7? so (h% not use the" conscious$%1C 1se (hatever position %ou (ant. 2C 2tart breathing. !C 6ock one (a% on the inbreath? the other on the outbreath. 'C +dd the PC pu"p. C *ake sounds as %ou start to fee$ good. 1 C @ i s u a $ i 5 e t h e e n e r g % c o "i n g i n t o %o u r f i r s t c h a k r a a n d b e i n g p u "p e d u p %our inner f$ute b% %our PC contractions. 2C .hen %ou first practice? ai" for the heart chakra. Of course? %ou can practice "oving the energ % up to an % chakra? a$$ the (a % to the cro( n of the head. 4o (hat fee$s best in the "o"ent. 0C Enjo% for a fe( "inutes. =ou "a% have to practice a fe( ti"es to get the pieces (orking together. Once %ou do? just practice this co"bined e7ercise ever% da% or t(o for a fe( (eeks for about 1 "inutes. 2e7ua$ Breathing is the pri"ar% "ethod of channe$ing energ% out of vajra (hen %ouAre "aking $ove. ItAs a "ajor ke% to the Orgas" *aster% at the heart of the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution. It "a% reEuire repeated practice because at first itAs subt$e for "ost peop$e. >ater in this book? there are so"e partner e7ercises to deve$op the knack in the sack.

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E+ercise* Se+ual Breathing Self8)leasuring , ave %ou noticed %e t that "an % of thes e e7ercis es are bas ed on ear$ier s ki$$s %ou deve$oped- >etAs co"bine 2e7ua$ Breathing (ith 2e$f9P$easuring. 2e7ua$ Breathing 2e$f9P$easuring co"bines giving %ourse$f p$easure (hi$e "oving the energ % fro" %ou r genita$s up %ou r inner f$ute. .h%- Becaus e it s hou$d fee$ good? even better than jus t doing vaj ra. Becaus e %o u get to practice re$eas ing the energ% in( ards and up( ards ins tead of out( ards . Becaus e itA s the ( indo( to having "u$tip$e fu$$9bod% i"p$osive orgas"s (ithout cu"ing. /ot a bad sa$es pitch? donAt %ou think1C C reate a bit of a ritua$ ( ith this e7ercise. C$ean %our te"p$e B%our practice a r e a C . B a t h e %o u r d i v i n e b o d %. > i g h t a c a n d $ e . * e d i t a t e b % ( a t c h i n g %o u r breath for a fe( "inu tes . 2 et %o ur intention to honor %ou rs e$f ( ith divine p$easure. 1C 2ensuous$% "assage %our (ho$e bod% (ith $oving caresses. Be sure to inc$ude %our non9genita$ erogenous 5ones. 2C Begin 2e7ua$ Breathing for a fe( "inutes. 2 C . he n %o u A r e re ad % B bu t no t t oo Eu ic k$ %C ? be gi n p $e as ur in g v aj ra a nd %o u r entire genita$ region. Continue 2e7ua$ Breathing (hi$e %ou do this. Take e7tra specia$ ti"e and care to savor the s(eet fee$ings %ouAre capab$e of e7periencing. Enjo%? donAt rush. !C .hen %o u reach an arous a$ $eve$ of 0? focus on "oving the se7ua$ energ % fro" %our first chakra up %our inner f$ute to %our heart or higher. !C 1se the techniEues that (ork best for %ou to channe$ those orgas"ic fee$ings u p( a rd an d in ( a rd . 2 $o( %o u r ra te o f br ea th in g. 1 s e %o u r P C to pu "p e ne rg % u p on %o u r in br ea th . 6e $a 7 %o u r P C an d co ns ci ou s $ % $ o( er %o u r d ev a"a ni on %o u r o u t b r e a t h . * a k e s o u n d s t o r e $ e a s e e n e r g %. @ is u a $ i 5 e %o u r s e 7 u a $ e n e r g % as a strea" of fire getting co$der as it goes do(n %our inner f$ute and out %our genita$s.

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8C Continue p$easuring vajra and %our entire bod% up to &? :? and higher. 1se (hatever stop9start or interrupting ejacu$ation too$s %ou choose to keep the fire burning as $ong as %ou (ant (ithout e7p$oding. Acceleration Techni9ues .eAre just about done (ith (hat %ou can do %o urse$f. One $ast "ain t ec hn iE ue ? p $a te au in g? re "a in s to he $p e7 te nd %o u r $o vi ng s t a"i na . B ef or e ( e go there $etAs do a brief check9in. If after repeated practice %ou donAt fee$ an% energ% "ove"ent? $ook back at the ear$ier e7ercises and see if %ou short9circuited so"ething. *a%be one of %our f u n d a " e n t a $ a n c h o r s i s a $ i t t $ e s h a k %? p r e v e n t i n g %o u f r o " o p e n i n g t o t h e subt$e f$o(s sti"u$ated b% 2e7ua$ Breathing. To speed up %our deve$oping sensitivit% to subt$e energ%? I reco""end getting a cop% of the active Chakra Breathing *editation C4 I "entioned ear$ier. ItAs a faster energ% e7ercise than 2e7ua$ Breathing? but essentia$ for c$eansing and e"po( er ing %o ur chakras . It ( as a "aj or factor in acce$er ating "% $earning curve to run energ% a fe( %ears ago. I did Chakra Breathing near$% dai$% for severa$ "onths because it he$ped "e re$a7 b$ocks in "% chakras and tune in to subt$e energies. +s a resu$t of these e7ercises? I can honest$% sa% that "oving energ % is no( "or e p$eas urab$e and des irab$e to "e than a fas t hard s uck and fuck. +nd I $ove se7 of a$$ kinds? so thatAs rea$$% sa%ing a $ot. +nother too$ (hich produces great breakthroughs (hen faci$itated b% trained Tantrikas is the 2trea"ing Process . The na"e refers to opening %our path(a%s to the energ % of ecs tas % ( ithout s e7ua$ s ti"u$ ation and $etting the natura$ vibrations engu$f %ou. The strea"ing process is especia$$% po(erfu$ (ith peop$e (hose energ% s %s te"s are b$ocked. *argot describes ho( itAs done in detai$ on page 28: of The +rt Of 2e7ua$ Ecstas%? but (e find it rea$$% reEuires a ski$$ed p a r t n e r . I f %o u n e e d a b o o s t a t t h i s p o i n t a n d h a v e a c c e s s t o a $ o c a $ T a n t r a schoo$? ask for their he$p. Or $et Deffre and I kno( and "a%be (e can arrange so"ething to he$p %ou break through.

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%.% Plateauing
The fina$ so$o P abi$it % for %ou to "aster is p$ateauing. If %ou picture peaking as s hooting up s teep$% and then dropping Euick$%? p$ateauing ( i$$ be eas % to g r a s p . , e r e ? %o u " o v e u p t o a h i g h $ e v e $ o f p $ e a s u r e a n d t h e n s t a % t h e r e ? enj o %i ng it as $ong as %o u ( ant. .hen %ou can circu$ate the orgas "i c energ % u p f r o " %o u r $ o ( e r c h a k r a s ? %o u c a n s i " p $ % f $ o a t o n a t r u e e c s t a t i c h i g h ? basking in the divine $ight that infuses %our (ho$e bod%. O n c e %o u A v e e 7 p e r i e n c e d a n o n 9 s t o p ( h o $ e 9 b o d % o r g a s " $ i k e t h i s ? %o u c a n un de rs ta nd h o( t he t %p i c a $ "a $ eA s f as c in at io n ( i th s E ui rt in g a b ig $ oa d pa $e s b% co"p aris on. 2o"e ti "e soon? or "a %be a$read %? %ouA v e co"e to grips ( ith the grip that cu"ing has over us p$easure9stick o(ners Ba$$ "enC. The 1$ti"ate Ecs tatic 2o$utionA s hidden "ag ic ( orks ins ide %ou to rep$ace the urge to cu" ( i t h s o " e t h i n g b e t t e r . I f %o u h a v e n A t s t a r t e d t o c r a v e " o r e a n d " o r e f r o " e7tended se$f9p$easuring or se7ua$ breathing? p$ateauing is a $ike$% p$ace for the shift to begin. IA" not going to be too directive in this e7ercis e because of a$$ %ouAve $earned fro" a$$ %our ear$ier practice. 1se 2top92tart Peaking and other ejacu$ation interruption techniEues as %our back9up to prevent %ou fro" going over the top during this e7ercise. But stopping for "ore than an instant isnAt rea$$% the idea of p$ateauing. ,ere %ou (ant to use %our breath? sound? PC pu"ps? and subt$e adjust"ents to pace %ourse$f and "aintain a stead% bu55 of turn9on. 2e7ua$ B reathing ( i$$ beco"e %ou r pri"ar % a$$ % for p$ateauing. 1 s e it to open %ou r inner f$ute (hi$e %our arousa$ rises? creating an open channe$ for the energ% to strea" up and out of %our genita$s. B % the ( a %? if %o u skipped s o"e ear$ier as s ign"ents or rus hed the parts that didnAt appea$ to %ou? congratu$ations for asserting %ourse$f. But if? after a fe( tries ? %o u run into a $itt$e troub$e "aint aining a peak for an e7tended period? %ou "ight consider backtracking to the ski$$s %ou s$ighted. 1C 2e$f9p$easure vajra up to an arousa$ $eve$ of 0 (hi$e doing 2e7ua$ Breathing B%ou kno(? rocking? pu"ping? "oaning? and visua$i5ingC.

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2C .hen %o u reach 0? s $o( %ou r "ove "e nts and breathing? us ing sounds and visua$i5ations to channe$ the se7ua$ energ% up %our inner f$ute. 2 C I f %o u k e e p c $ i " b i n g ? s $ o ( a n d d e e p e n %o u r b r e a t h e v e n " o r e ? a n d u s e s evera$ P C pu"ps or other adj us t"ents $ike s $o( ing %o ur s troking or "oving fro" vajraAs head to shaft. ! C O n ce %o u ca n "a in t a in 0 fo r a ( h i$ e? $ et %o u r ar ous a$ r is e to an & a nd ho $d that p$ateau for a fe( "inutes. 'C *ove the energ% up %our inner f$ute? s( ir$ing it around %our heart? or higher t o %o u r t h i r d e %e . C a n %o u f e e $ t h e e n e r g % e $ s e ( h e r e i n %o u r b o d %- ; o c u s o n it? "ove around it? and breathe into it to heighten the orgas"ic fee$ings outside %our genita$s. C /o( p$a% (ith "aintaining a p$ateau at :. 0C =ou "a% easi$% e7perience a dr% orgas" if %ou p$ateau high enough and $ong enough. If %our PC starts to spas" a$$ on its o(n? ho$d %our breath? re$a7 %our "usc$es? and enjo% the ride. 8C ;ina$$%? see ho( $ong and ho( c$ose to :.: %ou can ride the (ave of p$easure? hovering just before the point of no return. !C If %ou s$ip over the edge? enjo% the gift of orgas"ic p$easure? kno(ing that %o u r s e a r c h f o r O r g a s " * a s t e r % i s n e a r i n g i t A s o ( n p $ a t e a u . . h e n %o u f i n d %ou can "aintain a high $eve$ of p$easure for an e7tended period of ti"e? p$ease be sure to stop and rest so"e before %ou continue. Congratu$ations on co"p$eting 2o$o *aster%. /o( %ou have the too$s to engage partners in e7tended Tantric $ove"aking. , o n e s t $ %? I d o n A t b e $ i e v e %o u e v e r g r a d u a t e f r o " t h e k e % p r a c t i c e s %o u A v e $earned here. 6e$a7ation? open s ens es ? P C pu"ps ? peaking? p$ateauing? and se7ua$ breathing are no( the essentia$s of %our perpetua$ persona$ e7ercise

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progra". 1se it or $ose it shou$d be the "antra to sta% in shape. <eep it up? a$$ rightItAs again ti"e to report to an% inti"ate partners %ou p$a% (ith? if %ou havenAt a$read%. Brief$% e7p$ain (hat %ouAve practiced? ho( itAs "ade %ou fee$? and ho( %ou e7pect it (i$$ change %our $ove"aking u$ti"ate$%. Of course? ne7t (eA$$ e"bark on perfecting these ski$$s (ith a partner. 2o"e of thes e s ki$$s can be and shou$d be "ain tained through j oint practice. 2 o"e of the" %ouA$$ (ant to co"e to back to no( and then (hen %ouAre (ithout a partner or $ose the edge. Others? PC pu"ps for e7a"p$e? shou$d be part of %our dai$% regi"en.

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Chapter -: Partner Prep


/ o( %o uA $$ begin to integrate %o ur ne( ski$$s into partner practic es . +s %ou g a i n "a s t e r % o v e r t h e 1 $ t i " a t e E c s t a t i c 2 o $ u t i o n ? %o u A $ $ n a t u r a $ $ % b e c o " e a "uch better $over. +nd %ouA$$ enjo% it "uch "ore. Chapter is about "ore than %ou? since %ouAve got to negotiate a (orkab$e dea$ (ith a partner? ne( or $ong9ter". This is not so"ething that (orks (e$$ if %ou keep it a secret or spring it on a $over (hi$e in the sack. 2o (eA$$ ta$k about c o " " u n i c a t i o n b e f o r e %o u g e t t o t o u c h e a c h o t h e r . T h e n ? %o u A $ $ t a k e t u r n s doing each other ( ith hands at firs t? and "a % ( ant to add "ouths ? $ips ? and tongues (hi$e %ouAre at it. The fina$ e7ercises in this chapter are about doing each other at the s a"e ti"e. Oh? I a$ "os t forgot? ( ithout cu"ing? at $eas t to start. IAve "ade a big dea$ about 6+*PE6 at the beginning of each chapter up to this point. C hapters and 0 are about ho( 6+*P E a$$ (ork together so IA$$ $eave it at that. 1se ever%thing %ouAve $earned so far and have fun.

-.1 7alse E4pectations +ill 8ill 9ou


=ou and I have gotten c$os e through a$$ these inti"ate e7ercises? right- I think itAs ti"e to be co"p$ete$% honest (ith ourse$ves and (ith each other. . i $ $ %o u b e c o "e t h e ( o r $ d A s g r e a t e s t s t u d ? a b $ e t o s a t i s f % a n % a n d a $ $ a t a n % ti"e- *a%be and "a%be not. I havenAt. 2o"eti"es? I can go a$$ night (ith "ore than one partner ( ith a$$ of us having outrageous "u$tip $e orgas "s . 2o"eti"es? "% biorh%th"s? "% energ%? or "% che"istr% (ith a $over just arenAt there and IA" not the u$ti"ate Doe 2tud. I fu"b$e? I get turned9off? I cu" ear$%. ; o r t u n a t e $ %? t h a t A s r a r e n o ( ? b u t i t s t i $ $ h a p p e n s . ; o r t h e " o s t p a r t ? I A v e $earned to accept that "% $i"itations at ti"es.

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+s I $ook back? it (asnAt a$$ "% doing that "ade that ear$% partner cu" ten ti"es in a ha$f9an9hour. In the sa"e vein? I (asnAt tota$$% responsib$e that "% $ong9ter" partner cou$dnAt have an orgas" (ithout an industria$ strength vibrator. Is it the gu%As ro$e to a$(a%s be up? hard? and $ong9$asting (ithout e 7 c e p t i o n - . e $ $ ? s o " e p a r t o f " e h a s a $ ( a %s ( a n t e d t h a t t o b e s o ? b u t t h e "ore conscious part of "e rea$i5es that it takes t(o to Tango. I "ean? t(o to Tantra. .eA ve a$$ got s trengths ? needs ? and $i "it ations . T( o bas ic parts of Tantric $ove"aking are capita$i5ing on those strengths and p$a%ing around the (eaknesses. IA " inj ecting a s trong rea$it % factor here before ( e begin partner e7ercis es . .ant to kno( ( h%- IA " g$ad %o u as ked. Becaus e %ou r succes s ( i$$ $arge$ % depend on the attitude and cooperation of ( ho %ou practice ( ith. That "eans h o ( %o u e n t e r i n t o j o i n t e 7 e r c i s e s ( i t h a $ o n g 9 t e r " p a r t n e r ? o r h o ( %o u approach a ne( one. =ou both have to be open? aboveboard? and to$erant of "istakes. IAve pro"ised to he$p %ou ta$k about this stuff? and I (i$$ short$%. To have reached this point? %ouA ve had to $ove and accept %o urs e$f. To go fu rt he r? %o u an d %o u r pa rt ne r ne ed t o ( or k a nd p $a % to ge th er ( i th a T an tr ic attitude. ThatA s (h% ( eA re starting this chapter (ith bui$ding a partners hip for j oi nt O rg as " * as t er % an d de ve $o pi ng es s en ti a$ c o ""un i c a ti on s ki $$ s . = es ? I be$ieve %ouA r e read % for "utua$ e7ercis es .e jus t have to "ak e s ure that the t( o of %o u are in s %n c before %o u take turns p$eas uring each other and doing each other at the sa"e ti"e. Ooooh? that "akes "e hard just thinking about it.

-.2 Partnering 0uidelines


Common Aims Tantric $ove"aking is of energ% and both P$easure? not orgas"? unheard of peaks and si"u$taneous spiritua$ a joint dance (here each $over surrenders to inner (aves assist each other to reach higher and higher peaks. is the ai". B% soaring together? each partner can reach p$ateaus that cu$"inate in bigger? stronger? deeper? often c$i"a7es. But pushing for the Big O puts %our

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a t t e n t i o n o u t o f t h e " o " e n t a n d o n t h e ( r o n g t h i n g . O f c o u r s e ? %i e $ d i n g t o that fa"i$iar urge to sEuirt can short9circuit the (ho$e dea$. I f %o u r $ o v e r i s p u s h i n g f o r " a 7 i " u " s t i " u $ a t i o n a n d r u s h i n g h e a d $ o n g to(ards orgas" as Euick$% as possib$e? the t(o of %ou (i$$ be p$a%ing at cross p u r p o s e s . T o p r e v e n t t h i s ? b o t h o f %o u n e e d t o a g r e e o n c o "" o n a i "s b a s e d on the Tantric vision of $ove"aking. This "eans each being tota$$% responsib$e for %o ur o( n p$eas ure? as king for ( hat %o u ( ant? giving s ens itive feedback? going s$o($%? and savoring ph%sica$ and inti"ate de$ights together. This is ho( $ove partners stretch their co""union out for $ong periods of ti"e. If this isnAt c r %s t a $ c $ e a r t o b o t h o f %o u %e t ? t o g e t h e r r e a d a n d d i s c u s s t h e f i r s t p a r t o f Chapter 8 (hich describes Tantric $ove"aking in greater detai$. 1inding )artners If %ouAre sing$e and sti$$ deve$oping confidence in %our Orgas"ic *aster%? I understand that %ou have so"e apprehension about entering into a ne( se7ua$ re$ations hip. .hen %ouA ve connected ( ith a ne( person to the point of ( anting to be ph%sica$$% inti"ate? I strong$% urge %ou to approach this de$icate subject candid$% before %ou take %our c$othes off. This "a% see" a(k(ard or even daunting? so here are so"e suggestions to he$p %ou approach the conversation frank$%? positive$%? and ( ithout putting %ourse$f do(n. In other (ords? I donAt ( ant %o u to b$urt out FI cu" too Euick$ %F in a s purt of hones t %. 6e"e"ber? thatAs the o$d %ou? one (e donAt (ant to reinforce. ,ereAs an opening $ine to broach this subject. ;ee$ free to "odif% it so it sounds $ike %ou ta$king. Dust be sure to "ake it positive... 'I'm studying to be a %an tric lover, merging spirit with physical pleasure. %antra is an ancient spiritual practice that uses sexual energy to raise consciousness. It's teaching me to view sex as a sacred meditation. 'What this all means is that I want to go slowly, learning how to worship your body as I'm learning to love and appreciate your soul. 3ou excite me tremendously, but I don't want to get swept away too soon, rushing towards a 4uic) release. I'd rather begin by playing sensitively with the

energy between us for long periods of time and move forward without any
96

goals other than pleasure. 'Will you dance with me, letting us experiment and teach each other, communicating each step of the way so we can )now each other fully and intimately!' I f %o u h a v e s u c c e s s ( i t h %o u r o ( n v e r s i o n o f t h i s d i a $ o g u e ? o r r u n i n t o prob$e"s? p$ease e"ai$ "e at "ai$to:2o"rajMTantra+tTahoe.co" and $et "e kno(. 6ong Term )artners C$ear$%? "en (ith $ong9ter" partners have so"eone c$ose at hand to practice (ith. This obvious advantage "a% be acco"panied b% so"e dra(backs. If i nv o$ un ta r % c u"in g ha s b ee n a pr ob $e " f or s o"e ti "e ? as ( on de rf u$ a s %o u r p ar tn er "a % be ? s o "e e"o ti on a $ is s ue s "i gh t s ur fa ce ( h en %o u b ro ac h t he subject of Tantric se7 and Orgas" *aster%. The e"otions %ou "ight be "et (ith 9 hesitance? resent"ent? disbe$ief? apath%? infuriation 9 can see" i$$ogica$ unti$ %ou deve$op so"e e"path% for %our $overAs s ituation. If %o u overreact to thes e reactions ? %ou cou$d b$o( the ( ho$e dea$ before %ou get started. ,ere are so"e suggestions that "a% he$p %ou to $ook at things fro" their vie(point... I Consider the (a% %our $ong9ter" $over "ight be co"pensating for the state of %ou r $ove $ife. =our partner "igh t va$ue other e"otion a$ needs 9 s ecurit %? affection? co"panionship 9 higher than co"p$ete ph%s ica$ satisfaction. Peop$e have been kno( n to $ive happi$ % ever after ( hi$e giving up so"e thing e$us ive Bbig orgas "s C in e7change for so"ething thatAs i"portant to the" B$ike having t h o s e e " o t i o n a $ n e e d s " e t C . I f %o u p r o p o s e c h a n g i n g t h i s d %n a " i c ? i n o n e s e n s e %o u A r e r e f u s i n g t o a c c e p t t h a t s a c r i f i c e . I f %o u t h i n k t h i s "i g h t b e t h e c a s e ? d i s c u s s h o ( %o u v a $ u e ( h a t %o u r p a r t n e r h a s d o n e i n t h e p a s t a n d h o ( these e"otiona$ needs cou$d be "et a$ong (ith better se7.

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* a %b e intercours e is nA t %o ur partnerA s favorite activit %. * a%be %o uA re ( a% "ore interested in se7. If either is the case? it "akes s ens e that %our Tantric p r o g r a " "a % n o t s e e " ( o r t h %o u r p a r t n e r A s e f f o r t . I ( o n d e r i f %o u r p a r t n e r has ever rea$$% e7perienced ecstatic se7- If not? see if %ou can get %our $overAs interest in the prospect of so"ething "uch "uch better. = our partner "a % have concerns and obj ections to s o"e of the cons eEuences of the 1 $ti"ate Ecs tatic 2 o$ution progra". ; or e7a"p$e? e7tended $ove"aking can cause soreness. Of course? the s$o( stop9start beginning is a good (a% to counter this concern. If s ens itive tis s ues are an iss ue? %o u need to pro"is e to be e7tra carefu$? conscious? and assertive about rep$enishing $ubrication. + s t ru ct ur ed a pp ro ac h do es n A t ( or k fo r ev er %b o d %. = ou r pa rt ne r "a % ( o rr % t h a t %o u A $ $ b e c o " e t o o c $ i n i c a $ i n b e d a n d $ o s e ( h a t e v e r h e a r t 9 c e n t e r e d s pontaneit % %ou have. If s o? e7p$ain that the s tructure is a te "porar % phas e d e s i g n e d t o p e r " a n e n t $ % e n h a n c e %o u r s p o n t a n e o u s $ o v e s h a r i n g . = o u c a n a$so propose to a$ternate "aking $ove (ith and (ithout structure (hi$e going through this progra". 2o"e partners "ight react (ith F(hatAs in it for "e-F E7p$ain the pro"ise of e7tended spiritua$ b$iss. Or horsetrade if %ou have to? offering to do so"ething %our partner finds va$uab$e. In other (ords? "ake a dea$ that (orks for both of %ou. = our partnerA s fears "a % get in the ( a%. ; ear of fai$ure or fear of being b $ a " e d f o r f a i $ u r e c a n b $ o c k %o u r c h a n c e s o f ( i n n i n g c o o p e r a t i o n . , e r e A s ( h e r e r e $ a t i n g t h e g r e a t s t r i d e s %o u A v e "a d e c a n h e $ p . T h a t A s ( h % IA v e b e e n urging regu$ar check9 ins throughout the 1 $ti "a te Ecs tati c 2 o$ution. 6eas s ure %ou r $over of the : K chance of s ucces s and that %ou ( onA t ho$d an%th ing against the". ;ee$ing coerced into he$ping or pressured into participating is no (a% to bui$d a (i$$ing inti"ate partnership. If %our $over fee$s this (a%? %ou need to go out of %our (a% to $et the" "ake the choice entire$%. Taking persona$ responsibi$it% and a$(a%s en$isting otherAs per"ission are funda"enta$ princip$es of Tantra.

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ItAs not unco""on for peop$e to resist change. 6esistance $ike this often causes hidden insecurities to surface. =our partner "ight think Fif he can $ast forever? (i$$ he sti$$ need "e-F 6eassure %our partner that %ouAre doing this progra" part$% to strengthen %our $ove re$ationship? adding a po(erfu$ bonding energ% %ou havenAt e7perienced ver% often. =ouAre partner "a% (orr% that %our desire for better $ove ski$$s is a ticket to po$%a"or% Ba $ifest%$e (ith open "u$tip$e $oversC. E7p$ain that the "ajorit% of Tantric coup$es are b$issfu$$% "onoga"ous and thatAs the right st%$e for %ou. BIf the % read parts of this book? %o u "ight ( ant to do( np$a % "% po$ %a "or ous $ifest%$e (hich isnAt a goa$ of Tantra or this progra".C If other fears or objections co"e up? p$ease "ai$to:2o"rajMTantra+tTahoe.co" and $et "e kno(. e"ai$ "e at

.hat overa$$ approach do %ou need to take to negotiate a cooperative partnership for the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution +bove a$$? enter into the discussion (ith patience and sensitivit%. Though it "a% not be %our past st%$e? adopt the Tantric "indset of tota$ gratitude for the gifts of the 3oddess. >et %our partner choose to p$a% 9 donAt use force? p re s s u re ? "anipu$ation to en$ist %our $overAs he$p. C ontinue to provide reas s urance of %o ur $ove and co""it "e nt to the re$ationship. *ake it c$ear that this progra" is designed to be a joint e7perience of deeper inti"ac% and bonding? giving %ou both ever%thing %ou ever drea"ed of. ; in a$ $ %? be $i ev e a nd e 7p $a in to %o u r pa rt ne r th at o nc e %o u A v e bo th e7perienced higher and higher (aves of ecstas% together through Tantric $ove"ak ing? an % "e"or % of thes e concerns ( i$$ pas s a( a % Euick$%. I f f o r a n % r e a s o n b r o a c h i n g t h e s e t o p i c s i s t o o t o u c h % f o r %o u ? s e r i o u s $ % consider so"e sessions (ith a Eua$ified reco""ended $oca$ se7 therapist. Deffre and I have $ots of e7perience (ith this sort of thing and are a$so (i$$ing to he$p (ith te$ephone counse$ing and coaching. or

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"our (ole =our ro$e in partner p$a% begins (ith being ab$e to receive p$easure. +t first g$ance that "a % 2O 1 /4 eas %. IA " ta$king about re$a7ing? e "pt %in g %o ur "ind of doubt? rising above %our fears? $etting %ourse$f go? and forgetting about reciprocating for the "o"ent. .e a$$ see" to have progra""ed $i"its of ho( "uch p$easure (eAre (i$$ing to e7perience and ho( receptive (eAre ab$e to be. 3 iving p$eas ure is a big turn9on to "e so IA ve had to $earn ho( to si"p$% re$a7 into "% partner giving to "e. + $$ of this is eas ier s aid than done? donA t %ou agree=our first assign"ent here is to estab$ish the intention to surrender to receiving p$eas ure. Be cons cious of %ou r $i"its and reactions . .hen %o u run into an interna$ barrier? be (i$$ing to stop and ta$k about it ca$"$%. The sooner %o u d o t h i s ? t h e $ e s s e " o t i o n a $ i t u s u a $ $ % i s . . o r k s h o p s ? c o u n s e $ i n g ? a n d Tantric Initiations $ike Deffre and I offer can rea$$% speed %our path in shedding resistance. Our teacher? *argot +nand? created a fantastic e7ercise on page 2 8 of The +rt Of 2 e7ua$ Ecs tas % ca$$ed the %i n9 %an g ga"e that can he$p. In this $ife e7ercise? %ou practice being pure$% in the receptive ro$e for an e7tended period of ti"e and then doing the sa"e in the serving ro$e. /e7t? %ouAve got to be an open book. =ouAve been checking in (ith %our partner regu$ar$%? reporting %our progress? and sharing the do(ns as (e$$ as the ups? right- If not? itA s ti "e to s tart co""u nica ting $ots "ore about this progra". .eAve ta$ked about the big do(nside of hiding %our Tantric practices fro" %our partner. 2ecrec% breeds tension (hich breeds invo$untar% cu"ing. /ot on$% (i$$ %our behavior see" strange to a $over (ho doesnAt understand (here %ouAre co"ing fro" Bor not cu"ing fro"C? but the % "a % get too ( i$d and pus h for orgas" (hi$e %ouAre deve$oping the knack of $asting. > a s t ? %o u n e e d t o t r u s t %o u r p a r t n e r o n o c c a s i o n t o t a k e c o " p $ e t e c h a r g e . Trust bui$ds gradua$$% and organica$$% so this is not an eas% fee$ing to "andate. If %ouAve been ta$king about this progra" and %our partner has been $istening supportive$%? %ouAve "ade a good start. 6egard$ess? the first e7ercises in this chapter (ade into sensua$ sharing cautious$%. +s %ou begin together?

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k e e p %o u r e 7 p e c t a t i o n s $ o ( a n d t a k e i t s $ o ( . 6 e p e a t e a c h p r a c t i c e e n o u g h t i "es un ti $ %o u bo th b eg in t o f ee $ c on fi de nt ( i th e ac h o th er A s c o ""i t "e n t to "ake the progra" (ork. 2etbacks are e7pected? and (hen the% occur? backtrack to the $ast e7ercise %ou did successfu$$% together. )artner s (ole >overs ( ith a deep heart9to9heart connection (i$$ inherent$% (ant the best for e a c h o t h e r . . i t h a g r e e " e n t o n t h e v i s i o n o f T a n t r i c $ o v e " a k i n g ? t h e %A $ $ natura$$% accept the ro$es being spe$$ed out here. But $overs (ho be$ieve that the%Are tota$$% at fau$t for their partnerAs genita$ sensitivit% "a% be re$uctant to fu$$% engage. Both "ust o(n their share of the situation open$%. P artner (ho fee$ co"p$ete$ % res pons ib$e for their $overs A p$easure "ight push for e7p$osive orgas"s to prove their $ove. >overs insecure about their se7ua$it% "a% fee$ that "aking their partner cu" proves that the%Are se7%? desirab$e? and ski$$ed in bed. If %ou find %ourse$f in this situation? e7p$ain about i"p$osive energ% orgas"s and that u$ti"ate$% (eAre each the "aster of our o(n ecstas%. >overs (ho donAt have orgas"s easi$% "a% $ose the"se$ves in a rush to(ards e7p$osive re$ief? dragging their partners over the edge. The% need to understand about the advantages of p$a%ing (ithout goa$s? and ho( bigger and b e t t e r o r g a s "s "a % e v e n t u a $ $ % r e s u $ t . E 7 p $ a i n h o( b a s k i n g i n t h e f $ o o d o f e7cite"ent in each "o"ent $ets the energ% bui$d to higher and higher p$ateaus. .ithout this frank kind of dia$ogue? %our se7 partner "a% push %ou into a st%$e o f f uc ki ng t ha t ( o nA t ( or k f or %o u e ar $ % i n th e pr og ra "? o r e ve r. T o pr ev en t t hi s f ro " ha pp en in g? r e"i nd %o u r $ ov er ab ou t h o( "uc h "or e p $e as ur e %o u A $ $ both receive b% starting s$o($%. 6e"ind %our partner ho( "uch p$easure %ou receiver fro" I*P>O2I@E orgas"s. 6e"ind %our be$oved that %ouA$$ be $ess sensitive after one of these inner energ% e7periences and read% to stroke faster and deeper for a (hi$e. +bove a$$ e$se? re"ind %our partner that %ou can go to unheard of a$tered states together through Tantric $ove"aking b% changing the ru$es of the ga"e of se7. To Cum Or 2ot

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.e sensitive gu%s "a% sti$$ have the fa"i$iar urge to cu" as our occasiona$ or constant co"panion. Even if %ouAve begun to e7perience so"ething better than a E u i c k s E u i r t ? o $ d p r o g r a "" i n g s o "e t i " e s d i e s h a r d . 2 o b e f o r e ( e b e g i n partner e7ercises? (eAd be (e$$9advised to address the age9o$d Euestion Fto cu" or not to cu"- F BIs nA t that fro" 2hakes peare- C .ith a partner in the "i7? ans(ering beco"es a "ore co"p$e7 d%na"ic. = ou rea$i5 e that IA " pro9cu"ing in genera$ becaus e I s trong$ % be$ieve that p$easure in a$$ for"s is a good thing. 2o "a%be %ouA$$ accept "% suggestion of "oderation in good grace. I think itAs a good idea for the t(o of %ou to co""it that neither (i$$ intentiona$$% go for the Big O during practice sessions (ithout open agree"ent first. Be sure to discuss the conseEuences of the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$utionAs $earning strateg% 9 getting c$ose to the point of no return repeated$% (i$$ cause "istakes. =ou need to $earn to read each otherAs signa$s and co$$aborate together to sta% in the b$iss p$ateau. +$so? it (ou$d be great to "ake a dea$ that %ouA $$ both enjo% a$$ orgas"s together? (hether dr% or ( et? intentiona$ or accidenta$? and so"eti"es go for it.

-.! Turning Each Other On


> o v e "a k i n g i s c o "p $ e 7 b e c a u s e i t r e E u i r e s "a n a g i n g %o u r o ( n s t i " u $ a t i o n (hi$e res ponding to %our partnerA s signa$s. =our "ind can be fu$$ of Euestions $ike FIs ( hat IA " doing ( orking- F? F.hat do I do ne7t- F? F+ " I getting too c$ose-F and FIs "% partner getting c$ose-F ThatAs (h% (e begin 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution partner training b% a$ternating giving and receiving. .hen %ouAre receiving? %ou can co"p$ete$% focus %our fu$$ attention on %our outer sensations? %our inner fee$ings? and %our o(n p$easure. To "ake progres s ? %o uA $ $ have to fu$$ % accept being in this receptiv e ro$e. +chieving this a $earning e7perience a$$ b% itse$f for "ost gu%s (ho are progra""ed to strive to be the u$ti"ate satisfier of (o"en. =ouAd be (ise to e7pect so"e adjust"ent as %ou sett$e into pure receptivit%. If %ou can re"e"ber so"e hot e7periences (hen %our $over si"p$% gave to %ou? it (i$$ be eas ier to "ak e an agree "en t about doing each other one at a ti "e. .hen %ou each kno( fu$$ ( e$$ that %ou A $$ return the favor $ater? it ( i$$ be eas ier to re$a7 and surrender.
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Before doing each practice? be sure %ou read the instructions together. E7cept for the first coup$e of e7ercises in this chapter? (hich are c$ear$% "arked? %ouA$$ (ant to do "ost of these practices severa$ ti"es at $east spread over a (eek or t(o. 6e"e"ber? %ouAre absorbing the Tantric spirit of $ove"aking (hich advises %ou to go s$o($% and savor ever% $itt$e tidbit of sensation. ;ocus on the journe% not the destination. 4onAt rush so %ou can enjo% "ore. E+ercise* Agreeing On Signals Take a fe( "inu tes no( to agree on s igna$s %ouA $$ depend on during practices a n d u n s t r u c t u r e d $ o v e " a k i n g . 2 i g n a $ s a r e ( o r d s ? s o u n d s ? o r h a n d "o t i o n s %ouA$$ use to give %our partner feedback about %our erotic reactions and arousa$ $eve$. =ouA$$ both benefit fro" having a cr%sta$ c$ear shorthand that $ets %ou e7press %ourse$f (ithout getting too deep$% into the "ind. It takes practice to insure a Euick? si"p$e? effort$ess? non9distracting (a% to a$ert %our partner to (here %ouAre at in each "o"ent. Pri"ar% a"ong these cues is the 1) point sca$e (eAve been using... ) 1 2 ! ' P P P P P P 0P 8 P & P : P :.: no arousa$ t(inge at base of penis occasiona$ $itt$e surges of p$easure starting to fee$ good stead% hu" $o( $eve$ arousa$ fee$ing rea$$% good? "etabo$is" increases rea$$% into it? donAt (ant to stop continuous rush of p$easure? fast breathing bu55ing inside? face f$ushed? heart pounding intense p$easure? outside (or$d is far a(a% P point of no return? e"ission phase begins

1) P ejacu$ation Be7pu$sion phaseC 1C 6ead the instructions to this e7ercise together.

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2C +gree on (ords? sounds? or signa$s for Fs$o(F and Fstop.F I $ike to sa% Fa $itt$e s$o(er p$easeF to s$o( "% partner do(n? and so"eti"es I put "% hands up in a stopping "otion. 2o"e $overs $ike to sEuee5e their partnerAs hips or shou$ders $ ig ht $ %? pus h u p( a rd ? or gr ab th ei r h an ds to a s k fo r a co "p $ e t e s t op . ; ee $ fr ee to invent %our o(n and use (hat fee$s best. !C E7p$ain %our e7perience (ith the 1)9point sca$e and an% persona$ definitions %ouA v e dis covered. + gree that s o"eti "e s %ouA $$ jus t us e a nu"ber to conve % %our $eve$ of arousa$. 2C Practice (ith a co""unication c%c$e that begins and ends (ith positive reinforce"ent. I ca$$ this the Ffeedback sand(ichF. ItAs a dip$o"atic (a% to ask for changes (ithout hurting %our partnerAs fee$ings. +n%ti"e %ou (ant to be p$easured different$%? begin b% finding so"ething to co"p$i"ent. /e7t? ask for (hat %ou (ant? e7p$aining ho( that (ou$d fee$ even better. ;ina$$%? ackno($edge so"ething about (hatAs (orking. If the change is nAt e7act$% (hat %ou (ere asking for? do another three9step feedback sand(ich. ;or e7a"p$e? if %our partner is stroking vajra too $ight$% %ou "ight sa%... '3ou have the most delicate hands. '%hey would feel even better with more pressure. 'Ooooh, that's really exciting. %han)s.' Practice the feedback c%c$e no( b% e7changing back scratching unti$ %ou fee$ co"fortab$e using the three steps routine$%. 'C Practice F%esG noF Euestions. 4uring erotic p$a%? (e a$$ sink into speech$ess ti"es (hen the feedback sand(ich (ou$d be difficu$t to do. .hi$e deep in the throes of ecs tas %? too "uch e7p$aining and verba$i5ing can s poi$ the "ood. +sking open9ended Euestions $ike Fho( does this fee$-F "a% shift %our $overAs attention out of their bod% and into for"u$ating an appropriate response. .hen "% partner isnAt giving "e an% feedback? IAve $earned to ask one9(ord Euestions that can be ans(ered (ith a si"p$e F%esF or Fno.F I use the" to better understand ho( IA" doing and (hat I cou$d do better. 1se si"p$e Euestions $ike... '1aster!' '(lower!' '5arder!' '(ofter!' Practice %esG no Euestions no( b% e7changing neck or head rubs.

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0C Ta$k frank$% about the fact that? becaus e %o u ( ant to pus h the enve$ope? so"eti"es %ouA $$ go over :.: and cu". +gree on an% signa$s that ( ork for %ou to a$ert %ouAre partner ho( c$ose %ou are and (hen %ouAve gone too far. Be sure %o u a c k n o ( $ e d g e t h a t t h e 1 $ t i " a t e E c s t a t i c 2 o $ u t i o n i s a $ $ a b o u t p $ e a s u r e . ;ind a (a% to accept that cu"ing is part of the fun. 0C Brief$% discuss an% other situations that co"e to "ind that %ou fee$ %ou need signa$s for. . h e n %o u f i r s t d o t h i s e 7 e r c i s e ? d o n A t t r % t o p $ a n f o r e v e r % p o s s i b $ e circu "s tanc e. 3 o through + greeing On 2 igna$s at an introductor % $eve$ firs t. Co"e back to it $ater if and (hen %ou need "ore c$arit% and better signa$s for ne( situations. E+ercise* 4o/ I 6i#e To Be 6oved The "ore %ou practice and p$a% together? the "ore %ou $earn about (hat turns each other on. Even $ong9 ti"e $overs donA t kno( ever%th ing thatA s going on inside their partners at each "o"ent. =ouAve $earned a tre"endous a"ount a b o u t %o u r e r o g e n o u s 5 o n e s a n d a r o u s a $ p a t t e r n s f r o " t h e p r e v i o u s s o $ o e7ercis es . ;or the fas test res u$ts ( ith the 1 $ti"ate Ecs tatic 2o$ution? %ou need t o s ha re a s "uc h of th is ( it h %o u r p ra ct ic e p ar tn er a s %o u ca n Eu ic k$ % a nd co"fortab$%. +s (e$$? turnabout is fair p$a%. The "ore %ou each educate %our be$oved about (hat ( orks for %ou and (hat does nAt? the better %ouA $$ both be ab$e to read each other. ThatAs (hat the ,o( I >ike To Be >oved e7ercise is a$$ about 9 teaching %our partner %our erogenous 5ones and (hat turns the" on the "os t. ItAs $ike the .ho$e Bod% 2ensor% ;ocus e7ercise (ith %our be$oved (atching. 2o"e peop$e find touching the"se$ves in front of another even "ore cha$$enging than other for"s of $ove "aking. But to practice e7tending orgas " together? %ou need to gro( into this deeper $eve$ of inti"ac%. 4oes it he$p %ou to approach this as a d e " o n s t r a t i o n o f t h e O r g a s " * a s t e r % %o u A v e d e v e $ o p e d f r o " t h e p r e v i o u s e7ercise progra"-

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If %o u find this to be too a( k( ard? donA t pus h it too fas t. Ta$k about %o ur fee$ings open$% before %ou begin. 3o s$o($%? do a $itt$e at a ti"e? take breaks? b r e a t h e d e e p $ %? a n d r e $ a 7 a $ $ %o u c a n . T h i s ( h o $ e p r o g r a " ( i $ $ g r a d u a $ $ % e$evate %our inti"ac% to a ne( $eve$. /o( is the best ti"e to start. 1C Create a co"fortab$e sacred space to re$a7 naked in front of %our partner. 1C Touch %our bod% $ight$%? s$o($%? and gent$%? avoiding %our genita$s at first? $ike %ou did during the .ho$e Bod% 2ensor% ;ocus e7ercise in section !.' of C hapter !. 4 e"ons trat e (hat %ou $ike and donA t $ike a$$ over %ou r bod%? e7p$aining an% fee$ings and sensations as the% occur. 2C / e7t? se$f9p$easure vaj ra sho(ing (hat %ou $ike and (hat %ouA ve $earned fro" the 2e$f9P$easuring 4iscover% e7ercise in section !.' of Chapter !. Es pecia$ $ % de"ons tra te the s trokes %o u prefer and the ones %ou donA t $ike as (e$$. !C ,e$p %our partner understand that (atching %ou c$ose$% is top priorit%. C o""e nt on (hat %ouA r e doing as %o u do it? ( here %o ur attent ion is at each "o"ent? ho( different "ove"ents fee$? and (hatAs changing inside such as PC pu"ps and inner vibrations. *ake sure %our partner notices changes in %our breathing? s ounds ? hardnes s ? co$or? tes tic$e e$evation? spas "s ? and other s%"pto"s of running energ%. ' C B e s u r e t o c o n t i n u a $ $ % c o "" e n t o n %o u r a r o u s a $ $ e v e $ us i n g t h e 1 ) 9 p o i n t sca$e. C T h e n a s k %o u r p a r t n e r t o d o t h e s a " e e 7 e r c i s e ? d e " o n s t r a t i n g p r e f e r r e d techniEues and "a7i "u " turn9 ons . ; air is fair? right8C If %ou ( ant to take this e7ercis e a$$ the (a % to cu"ing? agree on a s econd phase of the joint e7ercise? si"i$ar to the Ejacu$ation +(areness %ou practiced so$o in section !.'. .hi$e %ou get %ourse$f of? describe ever%thing thatAs going o n ? i n s i d e a n d o u t ? t o t h e b e s t o f %o u r a b i $ i t % i n t h e " o " e n t o r a s s o o n after(ards as possib$e.

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& C + $ t e r n a t e $ %? %o u c a n d o t h e e 7 e r c i s e a t t h e s a " e t i " e ? t u r n i n g i t i n t o a "utua$ se$f9p$easuring e7perience. +i" to bring %ourse$ves up to three peaks together (ithout cu"ing. If %ou (ant to go a$$ the (a%? practice ti"ing %our orgas"s to see (hat it takes to "ake the" happen together. I find this $ast step "uch "ore e7citing than private se$f9p$easuring. If itAs the sa"e for %ou? %ou "a% find that it "akes %ou even "ore sensitive than nor"a$. 2o %ou "a% s$ip and have to practice "ore. ThatAs a good thing? right- 2o"e c ou p$ es fi nd gr ea t e 7c it e "e n t i n r ep ea ti ng s t ep B &C f re Eu en t$ % as j us t a no th er (a% to honor p$easure. If %ou ( ere co "fortab$ e and thorough? %o u probab$% on$ % need to do the firs t parts of ,o( 4o I >ike To Be >oved e7ercise once at this point of the progra". ItAs a great thing to repeat bet(een stages of the progra" after %ouAve $earned "ore about %ourse$f and %our sensua$it%. Besides? over ti"e (e change. +fter severa$ %ears of Tantric p$a%? Deffre and I sti$$ $earn ne( things this (a% about (hat turns each other on. E+ercise* )artner 'hole Body Sensory 1ocus Ear$% in the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution? %ou practiced beco"ing "ore a(are of %o u r b o d % a n d s e n s e s . I n t h i s e 7 e r c i s e ? %o u A $ $ e 7 c h a n g e g e n t $ e e 7 p $ o r a t o r % " a s s a g e $ i k e %o u d i d i n %o u r s o $ o . h o $ e B o d % 2 e n s o r % ; o c u s p r a c t i c e i n section !.'. This is just another step in $earning to shift %our focus to other erogenous 5ones so a$$ %ou r energ% does nA t j us t res ide in %o ur genita$s . + $s o? itA s great Tantric training to be "ore active ( ith %ou r (ho$e bod % during s e7. B% using fu$$9bod% caresses and nongenita$ touching? %ou can $earn to avoid fi7ating on just the hardest and (ettest spots a$one. 1C >ie do( n nude in a re$a7ed pos ture in a s afe? co"fortab $e? uninterrupted space (ith %our partner sitting co"fortab$% b% %our side. If %ou o(n a "assage tab$e? %ou "a% prefer to use it for this e7ercise. 2C Take a fe( deep be$$% breaths to re$a7 and $et go of an% stress %ouAve been carr%ing.

!C ; irs t? as k %ou r partner to be the giver firs t and >I3 , T>= and s $o( $ % touch
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%ou r (ho$e bod% e7c$uding %o ur genita$s . = our partner ( i$$ (ant to us e (hat so"e ca$$ a Ftaking touch.F This "eans that the giver fee$s as "uch (ith the touching hand as the receiver does (ith the part thatAs being caressed. B% taking touch? the giver concentrates on energ% f$o(ing to and fro" the heart? through the ar"s? into the hands and fingers. 4oc 2teven sa%s about this: FIf %ouA r e touching the s kin? %o uA re too c$os e. If %ou A re not touching? %ouA r e too far.F =ou as receiver can guide %our partnerAs touch b% "aking sounds on the outbreath to $et the giver kno( (here to concentrate. 'C ,ave %our partner as giver e7p$ore %our bod% gent$% and 2>O.>=? e7cept for %our genita$s? as if a %oung chi$d (ith a ne( to%. >et %our partner e7peri"ent (ith different strokes on different bod% parts? fee$ing each sensation $ike for the f i r s t t i "e . T h e g i v e r c a n u s e f i n g e r t i p s ? f i n g e r b a c k s ? n a i $ s ? p a $ "s ? b a c k s o f hands? forear"s? and even hair. +sk %our giver to "i7 different speeds and different pressures (ith different bod% parts. The giver can touch $ike a spider ( a$king s $o( $ % on the s kin? $ike a butterf$ % ( andering ai"$es s $ %? and $ike a "oth dancing around a f$a "e. This is a good p$ace for %ou r giver to practice asking %esOno Euestions to get guidance on (hatAs occurring. ! C + s k %o u r p a r t n e r t o p a % s p e c i a $ a t t e n t i o n t o "a s s a g i n g %o u r f a c e ? h a n ds ? and feet? one at a ti"e. 6e$easing tension fro" these areas? (hi$e not a$(a%s se7ua$$% arousing? can be tre"endous$% re$a7ing. ;or e7a"p$e? so"e e7perts report that $etting go of the "ask of facia$ tension (e a$$ carr% goes a $ong (a% to(ards he$ping us overco"e the interna$ stress that contributes to invo$untar% cu"in g. C 1se the feedback sand(ich to ask for changes. Even if ever%thing is perfect? practice asking for changes a coup$e of ti"es. 8C /e7t? have %our partner do a si"i$ar e7p$oration (ith %our genita$s. =es? I "e an %o ur vaj ra? %o ur deva"ani B%our ba$$s C? and an %( here around there that turns %ou on. Together? e7p$ore %our favorite parts $ight$ % and s $o( $% in the s a " e c h i $ d $ i k e ( a % ( i t h o u t t r %i n g t o c u " . I f t h i s t u r n s %o u o n a n d %o u g e t hard? (e$$? thatAs greatG 2ho( it proud$%.

108

& C T h e n ? a s k %o u r p a r t n e r t o i n c $ u d e %o u r ( h o $ e b o d % i n t h e s a " e ( a %? e7c$uding nothing. ;ee$ those e7cited fee$ings fu$$% and $et %our partner kno( about the" through sound and "ove"ent. E7p$ain ho( being turned9on affects different parts of %our bod%: hair? nipp$es? deva"ani? vajra? etc. &C E7change ro$es and do the e7ercise for %our partner. .e do so"e version of this a$"ost ever% ti"e (e "ake $ove. This is an i " p o r t a n t e 7 e r c i s e t o d o r e p e a t e d $ %. . h e n %o u c a n f u $ $ % r e $ a 7 a n d f e e $ ever%thing? then itAs ti"e to "ove on.

-.% Taking Turns


D e f f r e g i v e s a ( e s o "e "a n u a $ p $ e a s u r e . . e A v e $ e a r n e d a $ o t a b o u t e 7 t e n d i n g our $ove p$a% b% e7changing this kind of erotic touching? not to "ention having great fun and i"proving our co""unication ski$$s. .e ca$$ the" Fhand jobsF so I thought IAd ca$$ a spade a spade (ith this pivota$ e7ercise. E+ercise* Sto,8Start 4and 3ob =ouAve got $ots of e7perience (ith the so$o version of this e7ercise? 2top92tart P eaking? fro" %o ur (ork s e$f9 p$eas uring Bis that an o7%"o ron- C in Chapters ! and '. =ou have the sa"e ai" here? enjo%ing !) "inutes of stroking (ithout sEuirting. +$$ %ou have to do no( is bring %our partner into the s(ing of things and get coordinated. 1C >ie on %our back in %our "ost co"fortab$e position: have %our knees bent? supported b% a pi$$o(? or si"p$% e7tended straight out. =our partner can sit or knee$ bet( een %ou r $egs or at %ou r s ide. 3 iver co"for t is as i"portan t as receiver co"fort. Tens ion in the giverA s bod % trans "i ts to the receiver? s o be sure to e7peri"ent and find a position that can $ast a (hi$e for both of %ou. 1C +fter pre$i"inaries $ike ta$king? re$a7ing? breathing? and fu$$ bod% sensua$ "assage? ask %our partner to begin stroking vajra and %our deva"ani (ith dr% hands.

109

!C =our partner shou$d c$ose$% (atch for signs of %our rising arousa$: vajraAs hardness and co$or? breathing changes? thrusting hips? bod% jerks? $ifting of d e v a "a n i ? p u $ s i n g o f v a j r a o r p e $ v i c "u s c $ e s ? h a n d s p u s h i n g a ( a %? a n d (ithdra(ing pe$vis. +t the sa"e ti"e as %our partner observes %ou c$ose$%? %ou s hou$d be giving verba$ feedback about %o uA re s ens ations and %ou r $eve$ of arousa$. !C .hen %o u reach 0 on the s ca$e? us e (hatever s igna$ %ouA ve agreed9 upon so that %our partner i""ediate$% stops a$$ sti"u$ation. =ou "a% (ant to ask %our $overAs hands to be re"oved entire$% if that he$ps %ou re$a7. = ou kno( the rest of the dri$$: open %our e%es (ide? re$a7 a$$ %our "usc$es? take s$o( deep s$o( breaths? and (ait unti$ %our e7cite"ent drops to 2. 'C 6epeat B2C through B'C five "ore ti"es up to 0. C C on ti nu e th e e 7e rc is e b % r ep ea ti ng th e s a"e s te ps u p to an a ro us a$ $e ve $ of &. Then do it a$$ again up to :. 0C .hen %ou can receive a hand job for !) "inutes (ithout cu"ing b% stopping a nd s ta rt in g? r ep ea t B2 C t hr ou gh B8 C ( it h a $ ub ri ca t ed h an d. B6 ef er t o th e s u gg es ti on s ab ou t $u br ic at i on i n t he 2 e $f 9P $e as ur in g 4 i s c ov er % e7 er ci s e in section !.' in Chapter !.C ' C I f %o u ( a nt t o p us h i t? a gr ee ( it h %o u r pa rt ne r t ha t %o u ( an t to s ee ho( c$ose %ou can co"e to :.:? kno(ing fu$$ (e$$ that %ouAre $ike$% to s$ip over the edge and cu". Enjo% it and? $ike I said before? $itera$$% sEuee5e ever% $ast drop of p$easure out of vajra. :C E7change ro$es and "anua$$% p$eas ure %our partner? fo$$o( ing the guidance %ou receive. BIf %our partner is a (o"an? fo$$o( her instructions carefu$$% since I havenAt inc$uded an% fe"a$e anato"% or stroking techniEues in this vo$u"e.C . h e n %o u c a n e n j o % h i g h p e a k s ( h i $ e %o u r p a r t n e r i s p $ e a s u r i n g v aj r a ( i t h $ubrication for !) "inutes or "ore? "ove on to the ne7t e7ercise.

110

E +erc is e* S ub tle Ad $u s tm en ts 4an d 3ob /o( that %ou have so"e confidence that %ou can back off (ith %our partnerAs he$p? itA s ti"e to "ov e on to 2 ubt$e + dj us t"en ts P eaking. , ere? %ou A $$ repeat the previous e7ercis e e7cept %ouA $$ as k %ou r partner to "ake s "a $$ changes in ho( vajra is being p$easured instead of stopping entire$%. =our co""unication s k i $ $ s ( i $ $ b e c o " e e v e n " o r e e s s e n t i a $ n o ( . T a k e f u $ $ a d v a n t a g e o f %o u r signa$s? feedback sand(ich? and %esOno Euestions.. 1C 1se a co"fortab$e position for both of %ou. 1C +fter pre$i"inaries $ike ta$king? re$a7ing? breathing? and fu$$ bod% sensua$ "assage? ask %our partner to begin stroking vajra and %our deva"ani (ith dr% hands. !C +s k %our partner to e7peri"ent (ith different strokes ? s peeds? and press ures to find (hatAs "ore and $ess p$easurab$e just as %ou did during 2e$f9P$easuring 4iscover%. ,ave %our partner... +$ternate hands to see (hich fee$s better. Tr% up s trokes? do( n strokes? thu"b for(ard and thu"b back. C on ce nt ra te on t he s h af t? on t he he ad Bg $a ns or c ro ( n C? a nd t he fr en u$ u " Bthe sensitive underside of the headC. 1se thu"b and forefinger as a ring up(ards and do(n(ards (ith thu"b for(ard and back. 6o$$ vajra in bet(een both hands? and use both hands fro" "id9shaft out or fro" top and botto" to "idd$e. 6ub vajraAs underside (ith the f$at of the hand? and press or ro$$ vajra against %our be$$% or thigh. Pu$$ or tick$e %our deva"ani (ith the other hand. 1se the corkscre(? rotating the hand as it s$ides up? and the pop9off? sEuee5ing (hi$e sudden$% pu$$ing the hand up and over vajraAs head. 2o"e of these "a% be rough or unco"fortab$e (ithout $ubrication. If %ou find that to be the case? do the co"fortab$e ones first and then use oi$ or crea" for the re"aining ones.

111

'C .hen %ou reach 0? instead of stopping sti"u$ation? ask %our partner to var% the strokes to reduce %our e7cite"ent $eve$ a fe( points Bfor e7a"p$e? fro" 0 d o ( n t o ' C . 2 u g g e s t t h a t %o u r p a r t n e r s $ o ( s d o ( n ? $ i g h t e n s t h e p r e s s u r e ? c h a n g e s d i r e c t i o n ? "o v e s f r o " t h e h e a d t o t h e s h a f t ? s h o r t e n s t h e s t r o k es ? o r uses other "oves that are $ess e7citing. 'C ; o$$o( the s a"e regi "en as 2 top92 tart P eaking? repeating each s eries s i7 ti"es up to 0? &? and : or "ore. C . h e n %o u c a n e n j o % v a j r a b e i n g p $ e a s u r e d f o r ! ) "i n u t e s u s i n g s u b t $ e adjust"ents to drop %our e7cite"ent $eve$ a fe( points? ask %our partner repeat the (ho$e process (ith a $ubricated hand. C &C If %ou ( ant to pus h it? agree ( ith %o ur partner that %ou (ant to s ee ho( c$ose %ou can co"e to :.:? kno(ing fu$$ (e$$ that %ouAre $ike$% to s$ip over the edge and cu". &C E7change ro$es and "anua$$% p$easure %our partner? carefu$$% fo$$o(ing the guidance %ou receive. .hen %ou can enjo% high peaks ( ithout stopping or cu"ing (hi$e %our partner i s p $e as ur in g v aj r a ( i th $u br ic at i on f or !) "i nu t es o r "or e? "ov e on to t he ne7t e7ercise. /o( %ouAre ver% c$ose to rea$it%? since (eA$$ be using 2ubt$e +djust"ents Peaking during intercourse $ater in the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution progra". E +ercise* Breath )ea# in g 4an d 3ob 2 o "u c h i n t h i s c h a p t e r i s f a " i $ i a r t o %o u a $ r e a d %. / o ( %o u A r e g o i n g t o us e s e7ua$ breathing to spread %ou r e7cite"en t a( a% fro" %ou r hot spots $ike %ou did in the so$o Breath Peaking e7ercise. 1C 1se a co"fortab$e position for both of %ou. 1C + fter pre$i"inaries $ike ta$king? re$a7ing? breathing? and fu$$ bod % s ens ua$ "as s a ge ? a s k %o u r pa rt ne r t o b eg in s t ro ki ng vaj ra an d %o u r d ev a "a n i s $o( $ %.

112

=ou decide (hether %ou (ant to start (ith a dr% or $ubricated hand? depending o n h o ( s e n s i t i v e %o u f e e $ a n d h o ( ( e $ $ %o u A v e b e e n d o i n g ( i t h p r e v i o u s "aster% e7ercises. !C .hen %ou reach 0? instead of stopping sti"u$ation? ask %our partner to s$o( do(n s$ight$%. Open %our e%es (ide? inha$e "ore deep$% into the be$$%? but this ti"e through the /O2E? and ho$d %our breath. 'C 6e$a7 co"p$ete$% as %ou e7ha$e? visua$i5ing %our se7ua$ fire strea"ing out of vajra? and "oaning (ith p$easure to re$ease energ%. !C Inha$e again through the nos e? vis ua$i5ing that p$eas urab$e energ% "oving up vajra through %our pe$vis to %our heart and higher. 1se one $ong or severa$ short PC Pu"ps to he$p %ou shoot the energ% up(ards. !C C an %ou fee$ %o ur e7cite "e nt $es s en s i"p$ % b % s $o( ing %ou r breath- P $a % (ith it unti$ %ou can. 2ee ho( $ong %ou can "aintain a high p$ateau (hi$e %ou adj us t %ou r breathing. 1s e techniEues to interrupt ej acu$ation if %o u need to. 3uide %our partner to use stop9start and subt$e adjust"ents as reEuired. C ;o$$o( the sa"e regi"en as (ith the peaking e7ercises? repeating each series si7 ti"es up to 0? &? and : or "ore. 0C +s %ou practice and get c$oser and c$oser to cu"ing? see if %ou can back off %ou r arous a$ $eve$ jus t b % s $o( ing and deepening %o ur breath ( ithout %ou r partner changing an%th ing. .hen %ou can ba$ance on the ver% edge of :.:? %ouA r e bound to e7perience i"p $os ive orgas "s ? ( here %o u vibrate ins ide and strea" the energ% up(ard (ithout sEuirting. :C E7change ro$es and "anua$$% p$easure %our partner? carefu$$% fo$$o(ing the guidance %ou receive. E+ercise* Oral )leasuring , ere is an optiona$ e7ercis e ( hich fo$$o( s the s a"e s eEuence of s teps us ing ora$ p$eas uring. I ca$$ it optiona$ becaus e not ever%one $oves ora$ s e7 the (a%

113

(e do. If %ouAre (i$$ing? itAs another great (a% to deve$op Orgas" *aster% in a high$% e7citing situation. 1C 1se a co"fortab$e position for both of %ou. 1C +fter pre$i"inaries $ike ta$king? re$a7ing? breathing and fu$$ bod% sensua$ "as sage? ask %our partner to s $o( $% begin $icking and sucking vajra and %our deva" an i. 2C .hen %ou reach 0? us e ( hatever s igna$ %ouA v e agreed9upon s o that %ou r partner i""ediate$% stops a$$ sti"u$ation. =ou "a% (ant to ask for our $overAs "outh to be re"oved entire$ % if that he$ps %ou re$a7. =ou kno( the rest of the dri$$: open %our e%es (ide? re$a7 a$$ %our "usc$es? take s$o( deep s$o( breaths? and (ait unti$ %our e7cite"ent drops. 2C 6 epeat the e7ercis e us ing 2top92tart at 0? &? and : si7 ti"es at each arousa$ $eve$. ! C 6 ep ea t th e e 7e rc is e up t o 0 ? &? a nd : gu id in g %o u r pa rt ne r ( i th f ee db ac k to us e 2ubt$e + djus t"ents to he$p %ou peak and then p$ateau. ! C 6 e p e a t t h e e 7 e r c i s e u p t o 0 ? & ? a n d : us i n g 2 e 7 u a $ B r e a t h i n g t o h e $ p %o u peak and then p$ateau. 'C +s %ou practice and get c$oser and c$oser to cu"ing? see if %ou can back off %our arousa$ $eve$ just b% s$o(ing and deepening %our (ithout %our partner c h a n g i n g a n %t h i n g . . h e n % o u c a n b a $ a n c e o n t h e v e r % e d g e o f : . : ? %o u A r e bound to e7perience i"p $os ive orgas "s ? ( here %o u vibrate ins ide and s trea" the energ% up(ard (ithout sEuirting. ' C E 7 c h a n g e r o $ e s a n d o r a $ $ % p $ e a s u r e %o u r p a r t n e r ? c a r e f u $ $ % f o $ $ o ( i n g t h e guidance %ou receive.

114

-.- 1oing Each Other (t The /a"e Ti"e


= eah? ( eA re rea$$ % upping the ante (hen %ou give and receive at the s a"e ti"e. I f %o u A r e a n %t h i ng $ ik e "e an d "os t of th e s e 7 % gu %s I kn o( ? g iv in g p$ ea s u re t u r n s %o u o n a $ " o s t a s " u c h a s r e c e i v i n g . 4 o i n g e a c h o t h e r t o g e t h e r i s a d o u b $ e ( h a "" % f o r r e a $ $ % s e ns i t i v e g u %s $ i k e u s . B u t %o u A v e "a d e i t t h i s f a r and have a$$ the reEuisite ski$$s? right- 2o $etAs go for it and p$a% together. .hat do %ou sa%E+ercise* Mutual 4and83obs =ouAve $earned an a(fu$ $ot about %our o(n and each otherAs turn9ons. 2ure$%? thatAs given %ou greater a(areness and confidence in and around se7. ;or this e7ercise? though? forget about being too c$inica$ (ith a$$ that infor"ation %ouAve fi$ed a(a% in %our "ind. Instead? just p$a% in the "o"ent. +ct $ike $itt$e kids e7p$oring ne( territor% for the first ti"e. 1C ;ind a co"fortab$e position (here %ou can $a% ne7t to each other? ta$k easi$%? and reach each otherAs genita$s (ith %our hands. 2C Ta$k about (hat %ouAve both discovered %ou enjo% as if %ouAve just discovered it. 1 C 3 e n t $ % c a r e s s e a c h o t h e r A s b o d %? t a k i n g p $ e a s u r e f r o " %o u r t o u c h a $ $ o v e r . +s %ou fee$ it? begin se7ua$$% breathing? inc$uding sounds and PC pu"ps. !C 2$o($% begin to focus on each otherAs genita$s? asking %esOno Euestions and using the feedback sand(ich to guide each other. 2 C 4 e c i d e ( h a t $ e v e $ s %o u ( a n t t o p e a k a t . 3 i v e 1 9 : f e e d b a c k a b o u t %o u r a r o u s a $ $ e v e $ ? a s k i n g o r s i g n a $ i n g f o r s t o p s ( h e n %o u ( a n t t o p e a k s e v e r a $ ti"es. 1C Continue peaking severa$ ti"es using subt$e adjust"ents and se7ua$ breathing a$one? seeing ho( $ong %ou can "ake it $ast.

115

8C If %ou (ant to cu" together? go for it and enjo% it. 6epeat this e7ercise severa$ ti"es unti$ %ou can use ever%thing %ouAve $earned (hi$e doing each other. E +erc is e* ;< +gain? hereAs another e7ercise optiona$ for those (ho de$ight in ora$ gratific ation. If %o uA re ( i$$ing? 0: "a % the "os t cha$$enging ass ign "ent for %o u r $ o v e " a k i n g p a r t n e r s h i p s i n c e o r a $ s e 7 $ i "i t s t h e a " o u n t o f t a $ k i n g %o u can do. =ouA$$ be depending "ore on %our abi$it% to channe$ energ% and %our partnerAs abi$it% to read %our arousa$ $eve$. 1C ;ind a co"fortab$e position (here %ou can each ora$$% p$easure %our partnerAs genita$s. 1C 3ent$% caress and sensua$$% "assage each otherAs bodies to get turned on. 2C 2$o($% begin to focus on each otherAs genita$s. !C 3ive $ots of non9verba$ feedback using "oans and "ove"ents. 2 C I f %o u g e t t o o c $ o s e ? p u $ $ o u t . 2 t o p a n d t a $ k a b o u t h o ( %o u c a n p e a k a n d p$ateau "ore easi$% before continuing. ! C 2 e e h o( $ o n g %o u c a n "a k e i t $ a s t b % g o i n g s $ o ( $ % a n d us i n g e v e r %t h i n g %ouAve $earned so far. 8C If %ou (ant to co"e together? go for it and enjo% it. 6epeat this e7ercise severa$ ti"es unti$ %ou fee$ adept at using a$$ %our Orgas" *aster% too$s (hi$e doing each other.

Congratu$ations? "% friendG If %ouAve done the e7ercises to this point? %ou are tota$$% prepared for the u$ti"ate e7perience (ith the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution.

116

I hope %ouAve enjo%ed the trip so far. It on$% gets better once %ou get inside? as IA" sure %ou kno(.

Chapter 6: :ove"aking
4o %ou agree that intercourse is "ore sti"u$ating than other kinds of se7ua$ p$a%- *ost do? (hich is ( h% after a$$ %our ca$is thenics ? no( %ouA ve graduated t o t h e r e a $ t h i n g . I f %o u f i n d "a n u a $ o r o r a $ s t i "u $ a t i o n "o r e e 7 c i t i n g ? t h a n (hatAs co"ing shou$d be easier than the previous chapter. The (eal Thing& Chapter 0? so"e (ou$d sa%? is the rea$ thing. The rapturous dance I refer to as Tantric $ove p$a% (i$$ have to (ait unti$ the ne7t chapter. But %ou have arrived at the chapter (hich is a$$ about $asting during se7ua$ penetration. thatAs prett% da"ned rea$ if %ou ask "e. I ca$$ the e7ercises that fo$$o( @I= for @ajra 9 I n 9 = o n i . O f c o u r s e ? i n T a n t r a ( e a c c e p t a n %t h i n g t h a t g e t s %o u r o r g a s " i c energ% running 9 fucking? sucking? touching? or "editating 9 as sacred se7. + fter a $itt$e ta$k about taking it s $o( $ % and choos ing the bes t initia $ s e7ua$ position? (eA$$ begin (ith severa$ e7ercises (here vajra gets to approach %oni gradua$$%. Then (eA$$ do so"e ver% fa"i$iar e7ercises: 2 top92tart? 2ubt$e +djust"ents? and 2e7ua$ Breathing. =ou see ho( a$$ %our intensive practice to date (i$$ no( pa% off in the sack- Before (e e7peri"ent (ith a$$ sorts of se7ua$ positions? IA" a$s o going to inc$ude so"e Taois t techniEues in (hich %ou var% %our strokes to pro$ong $ove"aking. Oooh? (hat funG The Smart Se+ Tal# ItA s vita$ that %o u cons ider and dis cuss s "art s e7 ( ith a ne( partner before doing these e7ercises. Even if %our partner is a (o"an (ho uses birth contro$ pi$$s or another device? =O1 need to be responsib$e to avoid the possib$e spread of 2T4s Bse7ua$$% trans"itted diseasesC. 2ee the section of Chapter & (hich presents so"e detai$ed infor"ation about "aking se7 as safe as possib$e.

117

/o "atter %our situation and ski$$ $eve$? %ouA$$ (ant to take precautions against u n ( a n t e d p r e g n a n c i e s . I f %o u A r e ( i t h a $ o n g 9 t i " e " o n o g a " o u s p a r t n e r a n d %ouAre sure that %ouAve both been co"p$ete$% faithfu$? %ou probab$% fee$ secure " a k i n g $ o v e ( i t h o u t c o n d o " s f o r 2 T 4 p r o t e c t i o n . I f %o u A r e ( i t h a n e ( e r partner? ( e reco""e nd t( o s ets of tes ts for 2 T4 s inc$uding , I@ Bthe + I4 2 virusC? si7 "onths apart? before p$a%ing free$%. 6egard$ess of %our situation? I s t r o n g $ % r e c o "" e n d t h a t %o u t a $ k f r e e $ % a n d h o n e s t $ % a b o u t p r e g n a n c % a n d 2 T 4 p r o t e c t i o n . T h e n ? " a k e a c $ e a r "u t u a $ $ %9 c o "f o r t a b $ e a g r e e " e n t b e f o r e %ou begin.

6.1 Patience; '$ 7riend


+ $though thes e "e thods are e7tre "e$ % effectiv e? it "ight reEuire ( eeks of practice before %ou get it j us t right. 2 o"e s a % this is a s i79"onth progra". O h n o ? n o t ( e e ks o r "o n t h s o f "a k i n g $ o v e o v e r a n d o v e r a g a i n - = e s ? IA " a f r a i d so. + gain? itAs doctorAs orders . *os t se7 therapists agree that? if %ouAre (i$$ing to bite the bu$$et and practice enough? %our chances are : percent to favor of deve$oping the confidence to $ast $onger. , o( ever $ong it takes ? hurr%ing can on$ % bui$d tens ion and s $o( %ou do( n. C o"pa r ed t o h o( $o ng %o u A v e be en s $i pp in g p as t : .: ( i th ou t ch oi ce a nd ho( "an % decades of e7tended s e7ua$ p$a% %ou have ahead of %ou? (hatAs a fe( "onths of p$a%ing (ith fire=ou get "% point- =ouAve heard it before. Be patient and donAt put too "uch pressure on %ourse$f. ThatAs an orderG 3ot itIf %ou donSt succeed be%ond %our (i$des t drea"s the firs t fe( ti"es? p$ease s hrug it off and re"e "b er that %ouA r e (orking to( ards so"e thing thatA s not a Euick fi7. ItAs a Fbab% s teps F kind of dea$. If %ou s ti$$ have troub$e after ( eeks of practice? donSt hesitate to contact "e or a $oca$ se7 therapist for so"e e7tra guidance in order to c$ose the dea$. To 1ore )lay Or 2ot To 1ore )lay&

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=ou "ight be te"pted to do these @I= B@ajra9In9=oniC e7ercises (ithout forep$a%. I used to be$ieve that the $ess sti"u$ation I received before inserting vajra the better? hoping the initia$ abstinence (ou$d "ake "e $ast $onger. I (as (rong. *a%be I $asted a fe( e7tra "inutes? but I (ou$d soon rise to a peak ver% Euick$% and cu" an%( a%. That (as before I kne( ho( to run energ% and enjo% "%se$f in a variet% of (a%s for e7tended periods of ti"e. /o(? I rea$$% desire $ots of (ho$e9bod% forep$a% to get "% energ% "oving first? $ike the t %p ic a$ ( o"an. .hen I s tart b% getting revved up into that p$eas ure 5o ne ( h er e I j u s t ( a nt t o f $o at ( i th e cs ta ti c fe e$ in gs s ( i r$ in g t hr ou gh ou t "% bod% forever? s$o(9at9first penetration is fantastic for both of us. If (e on$% have ti"e or energ% for a Euickie and (e rush penetration? often? I find that itAs just a bio$ogica$ e7perience. .e ca$$ that a Ffirst9chakraF event. 4onAt get "e (rong? I $ike a$$ kinds of fucking. But no( I rea$i5e that itA s risk% to us high$% sensitive t%p es to begin se7ua$ p$a% (hi$e our energ % is concentrated in our genita$s. Bes ides ? since Euick genita$ p$a % doesnAt turn "e on a$$ over? (ho$e9bod% i"p$osive orgas"s are un$ike$%. 2o I guess %ou can see (h% IA" s uch an ardent fan of forep$a%. Of course? as ( ith an% s ugges tions in this book? fee$ free to tr% %our o(n approach and do (hat (orks best for %ou. 4o/ Often 7o "ou 7o It& . h i $ e ( e A r e o n t h e s u b j e c t o f f o r e p $ a %? $ e t A s t a k e a " o " e n t t o c o n s i d e r t h e effect of freEuenc% of $ove"aking on se7ua$ sta"ina. =ou kno( (hat I "ean 9 ho( often %ou do it affects ho( $ong %ou can do it for. If %ou "ake $ove ever% da% or t(o? not on$% do %our ski$$s sta% sharp? but %ou $oosen and spread the energ% that natura$$% concentrates in %our first chakra. If %ou on$% "ake $ove ever% ( eek or t( o? %ou A $$ be co$$ect ing and s toring %o ur s e7ua$ j uices do( n there. .hen IA" sitting on a reservoir of orgas"ic e$ectricit%? IA" certain$% "ore sensitive and $ike$% to e7p$ode easi$%. This isnAt supposed to be a sa$es pitch for "oving in together if %ouAre not or g e t t i n g " a r r i e d . D u s t a n o t h e r $ i b e r a $ d o s e o f r e a $ i t %. . h a t s h o u $ d %o u d o a b o u t i t - T h e o b v i o u s r e s p o n s e i s p r a c t i c e ( i t h a p a r t n e r "o r e o f t e n . I f %o u donAt have ti"e? then %ou "ight (ant to e7a"ine %our priorities. If sacred se7

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is taking a backseat to other energies in %our $ife? then "aster% of the "o"ent (i$$ be harder to achieve. In this case? %ou "ight sa% %ouAre getting (hat %ou p$anned for. ; re Eu en t s e $f 9 p$ ea s u ri ng t o s t i"u $ at e a nd ru n e ne rg % ca n he $p . IA " p ri "ar i $ % ta$king about the kind of p$a% that cu$"inates in i"p$osive orgas"s. Of course? using ejacu$ation to b$o( off the energ% that accu"u$ates can "ake %ou $es s e7citab$e (hen %ou fina$$% do connect (ith a partner. But so"eho( ? getting "%se$f off doesnAt sufficient$% ca$" "% e7citab$e s%ste". I rea$$% need to regu$ar$% "erge (ith fe"a$e energ% to sta% in the f$o(. 6egard$ess of ho( hard (e tr%? (e a$$ so"eti"es end up separated for da%s or ( e e k s . I n t h i s s i t u a t i o n ? " % a d v i c e i s t o t a k e i t e a s % a n d c u t %o u r s e $ f s o " e s $ack. >et %o ur partner kno( ho( e7citab$e %o u are and e7pect %o uA $ $ need to g o re a$ s $o( $ %. 2 o "e t i "e s D ef fr e a nd I j us t a gr ee on a b$ o( 9o ut e7 p$ os iv e orgas" to c$ean out our chakras. Then so"e hours $ater (e can "ore co"fortab$% re$a7 into the sacred space of ecstatic $ove p$a%.

6.2 /e4ual Positions


The position %ouAre in (hi$e fucking can affect %our abi$it% to "aintain arousa$ ( ithout ej acu$ating. * os t e7perts agree that the t%pi ca $ T"is s ionar %S pos ition (ith the "an on top of his partner is not the best to e7tend $ove"aking. .hen %ouA r e on top? %o u have to s upport %o ur ( eight. This generates "us c$e t e n s i o n i n %o u r a r " s ? s h o u $ d e r s ? b a c k ? a n d $ e g s . + $ o n g ( i t h t h e a d d e d e 7c it e "e n t? t hr us ti ng "ot i on s i nc re as e t hi s te ns io n an d ca us e "o re f at ig ue . >ike "ost gu%s ? %ouA $$ probab$% c$ench %our pe$vis? butt? s to"ach? and rosetta (hi$e pu"ping fro" above. +$$ of this can reduce re$a7ation and increase %our chance of s$ipping past :.: against %our (i$$. 'ho Ta#es The .,,er Bun#& *an% "en find it easier to pro$ong $ove"aking (ith the (o"an on top? because t he re A s $ es s "u s c $ e t en s i on an d g re at er r e$ a7 at io n. Th is pos it io n a$ s o re du ce s

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so"e "enAs sensitivit%. =ouA$$ find the e7ercises in this chapter start (ith %ou underneath for thes e reasons . T r % $a %i n g on %o u r ba ck ( i th %o u r p ar tn er o n to p? a $$ o( in g he r t o co nt ro $ th e o$d in and out. In this position? she can support her (eight re$ative$% effort$es s $ % b % knee$ing. In addition to reducing tens ion and e7cite"ent? %o u can "ore easi$% guide %our partnerAs "otions this (a%. *an% (o"en $ike being above because it gives the" "a7i"u" freedo" of "ove"ent? enhancing their p$easure (ithout the fee$ing of confine"ent underneath. /ot to "ention that the FsuperiorF (o"an arrange"ent frees both partners A hands for s e n s u a $ touching a$$ over. I kno( so"e "en have a prob$e" (ith (hat the% ca$$ the FinferiorF position. If %o u A r e o n e o f t h e " ? g e t t i n g u s e d t o b e i n g o n t h e b o t t o " ( i $ $ r e E u i r e a n adjust"ent. If %ou need convincing to tr% it? just cha$k it up to an essentia$ step in %our spiritua$ transfor"ation. Tantra teaches that (eAre each responsib$e for our o(n p$easure. =our pri"ar% concern shou$d be on conscious$% surrendering to receiving p$easure? (hatever the position is. If %ou h a v e n A t d r o p p e d t h a t o $ d "a c h o t h i n g a n d a c c e p t e d t h e f a c t t h a t ( e A r e a $ $ i n this together to e7change ecstas%? then itAs ti"e for %ou to start. A Smorgasbord Of )ositions >ater on in this chapter? ( eA $$ practic e other s e7ua$ pos itions : %o u on top? s ide b % s id e? s c is s o rs ? s po on in g? d og gi e s t %$ e ? a nd e ve n s t an di ng . 2 o "e a re "or e e7citing and so"e are $ess? depending on %our and %our partnerAs anato"%. E7peri"enting is the order of the da%. Bu""er? %ouAve got to tr% it a bunch of (a%s and see (hat (orks best for %ou both. ; o r "e ? I t h i n k t h e ( o "a n o n t h e b o t t o " i s t h e $ e a s t s t i "u $ a t i n g "o s t o f t h e ti"e. IAve $earned to ride the (ave (ith "e on top? "ost$% because I get to stop? s tart? and "ake subt$e a d j u s t "e n t s . The "ost sti"u$ating position for "e is (ith "% partnerAs $egs tight together? either (hen IA" on top (ith "% $egs outside hers? or $%ing on top entering fro" behind.

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*% friend? Da%? has a different favorite position that e7tends $ove"aking (hich he ca$$s F::F. To enter ::? %ou engage starting fro" the %ab9%u" position? (ith t h e ( o "a n s i t t i n g o n t h e " a n A s $ a p ( i t h b o t h o f %o u r $ e g s s t r e t c h e d o u t . T o enter ::? si"p$% $ean back fro" the %ab9%u" position unti$ %ouAre both $a%ing f$at on %our backs. 2troking in this position strong$% rubs the top of vajra? the $east sensitive surface? on %our partnerAs 39spot. >ater on IA $$ give %ou s o"e guide$ines to tr % a$$ thes e pos itions s o %o u can identif% %our favorites for Tantric $ove p$a%.

6.! (pproaching /lo&l$


.eAre going to precede thrusting (ith severa$ e7ercises that (i$$ gradua$$% a cc us to " v aj ra to %o n i A s s t i"u $ at i ng e ne rg %. P ar t$ %? t he s e s $o ( a nd ge nt $e p ra ct ic es a re t o h e$ p %o u re $a 7. P ar t$ %? th e % a re t he f un da "en t a$ n at ur e o f T an tr ic $o ve "ak i ng ? s $o( a nd "e d it a t iv e . + n d pa rt $ %? th es e e 7e rc is es $e t %o u tune in to energ%? %our "ost va$ued partner in the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution. ThereA s on$% one s trict Tantric guide$ine %o u need to re"e "b er at a$$ ti"es during the co"ing assign"ents. +n% respectab$e vajra enters a %oni on$% (ith per"ission. Even if %ouAre (ith a $ong9ti"e partner? p$ease ask first each and ever% ti"e. E+ercise* V2" =Va$ra 2ear "oni> ; irs t? ( eA re s i"p$ % going to introduce vaj ra to %o ni and her environ "ent. This is a gent$e (a% for vajra to acc$i"ati5e to %oniAs (ar"? "oist? and po(erfu$ energ% fie$d. Be sure %ou re"e"ber to breathe and find positions in (hich %ou c a n r e $ a 7 a s " u c h a s p o s s i b $ e . + s %o u f e e $ %o u r e n e r g % r i s e ? b e s u r e t o visua$i5e it "oving up %our inner f$ute. = o u A $ $ n e e d t o u s e %o u r j u d g " e n t a b o u t a p p $ %i n g a $ u b r i c a n t d u r i n g t h i s e 7 e r c i s e . I t A s $ e s s s t i "u $ a t i n g ? o f c o u r s e ? t o d o t h i s d r %. I f %o u g o t o o f a s t o r use too "uch pressure (ith a partner (ho isnAt (et? it cou$d cause u n c o "f o r t a b $ e f r i c t i o n f o r %o n i ( i t h o u t $ u b r i c a t i o n . I f %o u A r e n o t s u r e ( h i c h ( a % t o g o ? I s u g g e s t %o u b e g i n s e n s i t i v e $ % a n d a d d s o " e " a s s a g e o i $ o r $ubricant (hen %ou need it.

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I f %o u A r e ( o r k i n g ( i t h a $ o n g 9 t i "e p a r t n e r ( i t h ( h o " %o u s h a r e u n p r o t e c t e d se7? %ou can do this (ho$e e7ercise (ith a soft vajra. =ou can do it (ith a shiva $inga " Ban erectionC? but itA s not neces s ar%. ThereA s a great book I s trong$ % reco""end about Tantric $ove"aking ca$$ed The >ove <e%s b% 4iana 6ichardson. 2he advocates initia$ %oni penetration (ith a soft vajra as a nor"a$ routine. 2o start (herever %ouAre at and $et (hatever happens happen. B % the ( a%? the fina$ s teps of this e7ercis e s ugges t contact ( ith %on iA s inner $ ip s . ; or t hi s p ha s e ? %o u A $ $ ( a nt t o us e p ro te ct io n ( it h a n e( p ar tn er . Th ou gh the e7ercise is designed to acc$i"ati5e vajra? teasing %oni $ike this can be ver% e7citing to %our partner. If she gets rea$$% turned on? agree to p$easure her an% (a% she (ants after %ou c$ear$% end the e7ercise. 1C +sk %our partner to $a% on her back (ith her $egs spread and sta% as sti$$ as she possib$% can throughout the e7ercise. 2C +sk %our partner (hat kind of e7terna$ $ubricant she prefers if an%. 4iscuss (hen %ou "ight app$% it. ,ave it hand% before continuing. 1C 2 it bet( een her $egs ( ith %o ur $egs e7tended under hers . =ou can a$s o do this knee$ing. *ove %ou r pe$vis up c$os e and pers ona$ to %o ni . 3ras p vaj raA s shaft (ith one hand? $eaving the head e7posed. 2C * ove %o ur hand and bod% to a$$o( vaj raAs head to s $o( $ % and gent$ % touch %ou r partnerA s be$$ %? hips ? $egs ? and thighs . + t firs t? s ta % a( a% fro" the i""e di ate pubic region? c$io Bc$itoris C? and %on iA s $ips . If %ouA r e hard enough? %ou can rub vajraAs head and shaft an%(here he reaches. Continue this d i s t a n t c i r c $ i n g f o r a f e ( " i n u t e s a t $ e a s t o r u n t i $ %o u f e e $ %o u r e 7 c i t e " e n t b e g i n t o d i " i n i s h . B e f o r e "o v i n g o n ? c h e c k i n ( i t h %o u r p a r t n e r t o s e e h o ( sheAs doing and if an% adjust"ent is needed for co"fort. C 3radua$$% "ove vajraAs head c$oser and c$oser to %oni? at first $ight$% brus hing her pubic hair.

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0 C / e7 t? g en t$ % an d s $ o( $ % ru b v aj r aA s he ad i n ci rc $e s a ro un d %o n i fo r a f e( "inutes. *ove up one side of the outer $ips? circ$e above c$io? s$ide do(n the o u t e r $ i p o n t h e o t h e r s i d e ? a n d s $ i p a c r o s s t o t h e o t h e r s i d e b e $ o ( %o n i A s opening. 0C B efore getting an % c$os er? reverent$ % as k %ou r partnerA s per"is s ion for vaj ra to approach %oni. .hen %ouAre (e$co"e? touch vajraAs head to %oniAs inner $ips. +gain? "ove in s$o( gent$e circ$es (ithout penetration for a fe( "inutes. BIf %ouAve agreed to condo" use? %ouA$$ need to be hard and suit up first to do this and subseEuent steps. IA" sure %our partner (i$$ he$p if %ou ask s(eet$%.C 8 C / o ( ? ( i t h p e r " i s s i o n ? r u b v a j r a A s s h a f t u p a n d d o ( n %o n i f r o " t o p t o botto " in $ong s $o( s trokes . 2 tart b % both of %ou rotating %ou r hips for( ard. P$ace vajraAs shaft on c$io $ight$% and ever so s$o($% s$ide vajra do(n unti$ his s haft pas s es %on iA s inner $ips . Then s $ide up s $o( $ %. Continue this for a fe( "i n u t e s u n t i $ %o u A r e a c c u s t o "e d t o t h e e 7 c i t e "e n t ? i n c r e a s i n g t h e p r e s s u r e according to %our arousa$ $eve$ and %our partnerAs desire. 8C ;ina$$%? ho$d vajraAs head in %our hand. P$ace vajraAs head $ight$% on c$io and s$ide his head do(n bet(een %oniAs inner $ips. Then "ove vajraAs head back up again and cares s c$io for a fe( "o"ents . Increas e the press ure and speed according to %our arousa$ $eve$ and %our partnerAs desire. ThatAs a$$ there is to getting vajra acc$i"ated to %oniAs e7citing environ"ent. If this is super e7citing? %ou "igh t ( ant to repeat this e7ercis e s evera$ ti"es . Deffre and I do it a$$ the ti"e? just for fun. The @/= e7ercise is vajraAs favorite ( a% to gear up for penetration (hen he s tarts out soft. I rub vajra around %oni and c$io? guiding (ith "% hand. Invariab$% he Euick$% gets hard enough to enter %oni (ith a sea"$ess transition. E+ercise* Gradual Insertion VI" This practice is a @I= Bvajra9in9%oniC version of the sensor% focus e7ercises %ou did in C hapter !. , ere? %o uA $ $ ins ert vaj ra as s $o( $ % as pos s ib$e? re$a7ing? breathing? and opening %our senses as (ide$% as possib$e. I do this ever% ti"e I enter a %oni? (hether itAs (ith a finger? tongue? or vajra.

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Initia$ penetration is such an e7citing se7ua$ door(a% that itAs one of the "ost difficu$t ti "es to re$a7 and enj o %. I find "os t ( o"en $ove this s $o( ? teas ing? subt$e approach an%(a%. The% regard the sensitive and gent$e entr% as reverent 9 %our (a% of honoring the 3oddess the% represent. 1 C > a % d o ( n t o g e t h e r i n a c o "f o r t a b $ e p o s i t i o n a n d s e n s u o us $ % s t r o k e e a c h otherAs bod% as %ou do se7ua$ breathing. 1C ; ind a co"fortab $e s e7ua$ pos ition for both of %o u ( here %ou can see both vajra and %oni. BItAs not essentia$ for the (o"an to be on top for this e7ercise.C 2 C I f %o u d o n A t g e t h a r d f r o " t h e s e n s u a $ " a s s a g e a n d b r e a t h i n g ? a s k %o u r partner to p$easure vajra unti$ %ou do. BPut on a condo" here if agreed9upon.C !C If %o ur partner des ires "ore s ti "u$at ion before penetration? p$eas ure her "anua$$%? ora$$%? or using the previous @/= e7ercise unti$ sheAs read%. 1se $ubrication if she prefers. 2C +sk reverent$% before beginning insertion. + Tantrika "ight sa% '0ay va ra visit your secret garden!' 'C P $ace vaj raAs head on %o niA s inner $ips . 6e "ain there for a fe( "o"ents s i"p$ % fe e$ in g th e en er g %? s pr ea di ng it a ro un d %o u r bo d %? a nd $e tt in g %o u r e7cite"ent re$a7. 1se %our breath and PC to pu"p the energ% up. C +dvance vajraAs insertion into %oni carefu$$% and gradua$$%. I reco""end beginning (ith Euarter9inch incre"ents bet(een pauses. +fter each $itt$e thrus t? re$a7? breath? and spread the energ %. Ti"e %o ur "ove "e nts bas ed on ho( $ong it takes %our arousa$ to di"inish. One Taoist schoo$ teaches 1 deep breaths for each inch of insertion. BIf %ou get too e7cited? use se7ua$ breathing? PC c$ench? perineu" press? root $ock? vajra sEuee5e? scrota$ pu$$? or even (ithdra(a$ to avoid e7p$oding.C !C .hen vajra is co"p$ete$% inserted? re"ain sti$$? si"p$% fee$ing the sensations.

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:C 2ta% in this position as $ong as possib$e? savoring the energetic connection. +s vajra gets soft? he "a% re"ain inside or s$ip out. >et hi" do his o(n thing. =ouAve $earned c$ear$% that heAs got a "ind of his o(n? right= o u " a % r e E u i r e r e p e a t e d a t t e " p t s t o r e $ a 7 d u r i n g 3 r a d u a $ I ns e r t i o n ( i t h o u t a n e 7 p $ o s i v e o r g a s ". O n c e %o u "a s t e r j u s t r e s t i n g i n s i d e %o n i ? a ( h o $ e n e ( (or$d of "ove"ent (ithout cu"ing opens to %ou. E+ercise* !are::a =Still VI"> <are55a is a sti$$ $ove"aking techniEue first pub$ished b% +$ice Bunker 2 t o c k h a " ? a p i o n e e r i n g f e " a $ e p h %s i c i a n ? i n 1 & & ! . . i t h < a r e 5 5 a ? v a j r a r e"a in s in %o n i f or an h ou r o r "or e s i "p $ % f ee $i ng th e d e$ ig ht fu $ en er g %. .hether the "e"bers of the revo$utionar% Oneida co""unit% in /e( Eng$and (ho deve$oped this techniEue ( ere Tantric or not? I donA t kno(. But the% sure had so"ething that ( e fas t9paced? gratification junkies of the "odern (or$d cou$d benefit fro". <are55a or 2ti$$ @I= begins in si"i$ar fashion to the previous e7ercise. In this case? ho(ever? %ouA$$ use the (o"an9on9top position and inc$ude just enough "ove"ent to "aintain a shiva $inga". =ouA$$ each have a chance to "ove during this e7ercise? beginning (ith 1) "inutes and (orking up to !) each. 1 C > a % d o ( n t o g e t h e r i n a c o "f o r t a b $ e p o s i t i o n a n d s e n s u o us $ % s t r o k e e a c h otherAs bod% as %ou both do a $itt$e se7ua$ breathing. 1C .hen %our energ% is f$o(ing sufficient$%? "ove so that %ouA re on %our back (ith %our partner knee$ing over %ou and her $egs stradd$ing %ours. 2 C I f %o u d o n A t g e t h a r d f r o " t h e s e n s u a $ " a s s a g e a n d b r e a t h i n g ? a s k %o u r partner at this point to p$easure vajra unti$ %ou do. BPut on a condo" here if agreed9upon.C !C If %o ur partner des ires "ore s ti "u$at ion before penetration? p$eas ure her "anua$$%? ora$$%? or using the previous @/= e7ercise unti$ sheAs read%. 1se $ubrication if she prefers.

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C +s k reverent$ % before beginning ins ertion. + Tantrika "ight s a% 'Is your perfumed garden ready for va ra to visit!' 0C 2$o($% and gradua$$% guide vajra to enter %oni as %ou did in the 3radua$ Insertion e7ercise. .hen vajra is co"p$ete$% inserted? re"ain sti$$? si"p$% fee$ing the sensations. C .hen the e7cite"ent begins to Euiet? begin a fe( sha$$o( $eisure$% thrus ts . 4 o j u s t e n o u g h t o " a i n t a i n a s h i v a $ i n g a " B a n e r e c t v a j r a C . 6 e s t as $ o n g a s possib$e bet(een periods of "ove"ent? fee$ing ever%thing. +t a$$ ti"es? be sure to savor as "uch as %ou can about the p$easure %ouAre e7periencing. 8C +fter 1) "inutes of %ou doing the thrusting? ask %our partner to do the "i n i " u " " o v i n g f o r 1 ) " i n u t e s t o k e e p v a j r a h a r d . / o ( %o u A $ $ b o t h n e e d t o b e e 7 t r a c o n s c i o u s t o c o " " u n i c a t e o p e n $ % a n d f r e E u e n t $ %. O t h e r ( i s e ? s h e (onAt kno( ho( %ouAre doing and ho( to adjust her "otions to keep %ou e7cited at or be$o( :. :C Together? decide ho( %o u ( ant to end this e7ercis e: continue a$terna ting "ove"ent? (ithdra(ing and doing so"ething e$se? or rea$$% going for it. 6epeat this e7ercise? gradua$$% increasing the a"ount of ti"e %ou each "ove. + i " f o r 1 "i n u t e s e a c h n e 7 t t i "e ? t h e n 2 ) ? 2 ? a n d ! ) . . h e n %o u c a n e a c h "ove for !) "inut es ( ithout %ou s Euirting? %ouA r e read% for "ore "oving e7ercises.

6.% 'oving E4ercises


Coo$ tit$e for this section? huh- ; ina$$% %ou get to practice the o$d in and out. ItAs a$(a%s been a "oving e7perience for "e. =ouAre far fro" the first person to be deep$% interested in $asting $onger during intercours e. ThereA s a $ong his tor% of the ( ithdra( a$ techniEue? pu$$ing out before cu"ing? dating fro" ancient 6o"e ca$$ed coitus reservatus.

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These e7ercises "ore c$ose$% rese"b$e Imsa), a +rabic (ord $itera$$% "eaning Fretention.F I"sak obvious$% refers to retaining %our se"en inside (hi$e " a k i n g $ o v e . I "s a k ( a s a p p a r e n t $ % d e v e $ o p e d f o r "e n ( h o n e e d e d t o s a t i s f % an entire hare" each night and cou$dnAt keep getting it up again and again after cu"ing (ith each $over. I have to ad"it that IA " not rea$$ % pos itive about the order of the ne7t t( o e7ercis es . In the firs t? %o u s ta % s ti$$ (hi$e ins ide %o ni . In the s econd? %o ur partner sta%s sti$$? de"onstrating e7tre"e $oving patience. *ost e7perts advise this s eEuence. The oppos ite order (orks better for "e? (here firs t I get to contro$ se7ua$ thrusting "otions instead of depending on co""unication (ith "% partner to avoid getting too e7cited. 6ead the" both and decide (ith %our partner (hich %ou (ant to do first. Even though I havenAt instructed %ou each ti"e? %ouAve been re"e"bering to r e $ a 7 a n d b r e a t h e d u r i n g a $ $ p r a c t i c e s ? r i g h t - I n t h e s a "e ( a %? t o s a v e t i " e ? IA" not going to precede each e7ercise (ith directions to get co"fortab$e? e 7 c h a n g e f o r e p $ a %? g e t v aj r a h a r d ? a n d p u t o n a c o n d o " i f %o u A v e a g r e e d t o . =ouA$$ re"e"ber to do that during a$$ $ove"aking practices? (onAt %ouE+ercise* Still Sto,8Start VI" =eah? thatAs a funn% tit$e for this e7ercise. It "eans %ou re"ain sti$$ (hi$e %our partner gets to "ove? stopping and starting according to %our directions. 2ince %ouAre ver% fa"i$iar ( ith this dri$$ in other settings ? the peaking c%c$e shou$d co"e natura$$%. B% the (a%? itAs great to continue kissing and sensua$ touching a$$ over %our partnerAs bod% (hen %ou pause bet(een "otions. *an% $overs $ike this kind of variation during $ove"aking and appreciate the attention to entire bod% 1C >a% on %our back (ith %our partner stradd$ing %ou. 2C +sk if she is read% for vajra and guide hi" to s$o($% penetrate %oni. !C .hen vajra is co"p$ete$% inserted? re"ain sti$$? si"p$% fee$ing the sensations unti$ %our e7cite"ent begins to $essen.

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'C +sk %our partner to begin "oving (hi$e %ou re"ain sti$$. 'C B e s ur e to co ""u n ic a t e o pe n$ % a nd f re Eu en t$ % s o s h e k no( s ho( %o u A r e doing and ho( to adjust her "otions. 3uide her using the feedback sand(ich to var% ho( fast? deep? and energetica$$% %oni bounces on vajra. C .hen %o u peak at 0? s igna$ %o ur partner to s top "oving co"p $ete $ %. Take a deep breath? ho$d it? and sEuee5e %our PC "usc$e unti$ %ou drop do(n a coup$e $eve$s. =ou kno( the dri$$ (e$$ b% no(. 0C 6epeat peaking at 0 five "ore ti"es using s top9starts . &C In the sa"e (a%? peak at & and : si7 ti"es each. 6 e p e a t t h i s p r a c t i c e a s " a n % t i " e s a s %o u n e e d u n t i $ %o u c a n $ a s t f o r ! ) "inutes (ithout an e7p$osive orgas". Of course? the "ore i"p$osive ones %ou have the better. The "ore %ou do 2ti$$ 2top92tart @I= and the c$oser %ou get to the point of no return (ithout going over the edge (hi$e being re$a7ed? the "ore %o u A r e $ i k e $ % t o e 7 p e r i e n c e d r % o r g a s " s ? c o n t r a c t i o n s ( i t h o u t e j a c u $ a t i n g . Enjo%G E+ercise* Moving Sto,8Start VI" /o( %ou get to s(itch ro$es. =our partner sta%s sti$$ and %ou "ove? using stop9 s tart. B ecaus e vaj raAs corona and frenu$u" are ver % s ens itive? so"e find the $east sti"u$ating p$ace to stop is pressing into the %oni as deep$% as possib$e. 2o"e find the opposite true. Test it out and $earn (hat (orks best for %ou. +s %ou begin deve$oping %our ski$$? %ou "a% need to (ithdra( vajra part$% or c o "p $ e t e $ % t o "a n a g e %o u r a r o u s a $ $ e v e $ . = o u c a n e v e n s ( i t c h t o p $ e a s u r i n g %our partner (ith %our fingers or "outh during short breaks as %ou recover. =ouAve obvious$% perfected %our signa$s and co""unication ski$$s b% this point. Dust a re"inder? during this dri$$ donAt stop "oving inside (ithout e7p$anation. Of course? so"e da% %ou "a% discover that %ouAre tota$$% in s%nc (ith each

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other? te$epathica$$% kno(ing e7act$% (hatAs going on inside %our partner. 1nti$ %ou reach that "%stica$ arena? keep co""unicating. Other(ise %ou can create "utua$ tension (hich (e a$$ kno( contributes to invo$untar% sEuirting. 1C >a % on %o ur back ( ith %o ur partner s tradd$ing %ou . O r if %ou find %o u can regu$ate %our "ove"ents easier fro" above? get on top of %our partner. 2C + s k if s he is read% for vaj ra and guide hi" to s $o( $ % penetrate %on i. .hen vaj ra is co"p $ete $ % ins erted? re"a in s ti$$? s i"p$ % fee$ing the s ens ations unti$ %our e7cite"ent begins to $essen. !C +sk %our partner to re"ain sti$$ (hi$e %ou begin "oving. 1 C < e e p c o "" u n i c a t i n g o p e n $ % a n d f r e E u e n t $ % a b o u t ( h a t A s g o i n g o n i n s i d e %ou. ' C . he n %o u p ea k at 0 ? s ig na $ %o u r pa rt ne r a nd s t op "o v in g co "p $ e te $ %. T ak e a d e e p b r e a t h ? h o $ d i t ? a n d s E u e e 5 e %o u r P C " u s c $ e u n t i $ %o u d r o p d o ( n a coup$e $eve$s. O$d hat? rightC 6epeat peaking at 0 five "ore ti"es using stop9starts. 8C In the sa"e (a%? peak at & and : si7 ti"es each. 6epeat this practice as "an % ti"es as %o u need unti$ %ou can $ast for !) "inutes (ithout $osing it. Exercise: Both Moving Stop-St rt !I" =ouAve got "ore to practice to co"p$ete$% "aster the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2 o$ution. But %ou A ve co"e Bnot cu "C s o farG / o( %ou get to e7perience both %ou and %our partner "oving (hi$e "aking $ove. I probab$% donAt have to "ention it? but $et "e re"ind %ou that $etting go (ith (i$d abandon "a% sti$$ cause a Euick e7p$osive orgas". This e7ercise is sti$$ a

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s$o(? sensuous? "easured c$i"b up the arousa$ sca$e. O<? no( that IAve preached a bit? IA$$ $et %ou in on a secret. Tantric adepts are kno(n far and (ide for their abi$it% to p$ease (o"en. These F e 7 p e r t s F "a k e $ o v e i n a "a n n e r t h a t c $ o s e $ % r e s e "b $ e s h o ( t h i s e 7 e r c i s e unfo$ds. The% donAt pu"p strenuous$% and continuous$% unti$ their partner cu"s. Instead? the% tease? tick$e? and tanta$i5e for the $ongest ti"e. Instead of succu"bing to the urge to cu" that sti$$ "akes an une7pected occurrence? the% dance (ith their o(n energ% and the rising tide of ecstas% in their partner. The%Are not rushing head$ong to(ards the goa$ of the Big O. /o? the%Are savoring ever% $itt$e sensation the"se$ves and "i$king the interp$a% for a$$ the p$easure itAs (orth. =ouAre $earning ho( to do that ver% thing. 4onAt b$o( it no(. Dust keep f$oating in that end$ess sea of orgas"ic energ% (ithout conscious$% causing the e7p$osion. 2o"eti"es it (i$$ visit unannounced of its o(n accord. .hen it does? surrender and $et it s(eep both of %ou a(a% together. 1C >a% on %our back (ith %our partner stradd$ing %ou. 2C + s k if s he is read% for vaj ra and guide hi" to s $o( $ % penetrate %on i. .hen vaj ra is co"p $ete $ % ins erted? re"a in s ti$$? s i"p$ % fee$ing the s ens ations unti$ %our e7cite"ent begins to $essen. !C +sk %our partner to "ove s$o($% (hi$e %ou "ove as (e$$. 'C Both of %ou shou$d keep co""unicating open$% and freEuent$% about (hatAs going on inside each of %ou. C .hen %ou peak at 0? s igna$ %ou r partner and both s top "oving co "p$et e$ %. Take a deep breath? ho$d it? and sEuee5e %our PC "usc$e unti$ %ou drop do(n a coup$e $eve$s. 0C 6epeat peaking at 0 five "ore ti"es using stop9starts. 8C In the sa"e (a%? peak at & and : si7 ti"es each.

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6epeat this practice as "an % ti"es as %o u need unti$ %ou can $ast for !) "inutes (ithout sEuirting.

6.- The (rt Of 7ucking


= es ? "% tit$es are getting "ore and "ore des criptive. .h% not cons ider ho( %ou "ove vaj ra in and out of %oni an art- +s %our $ove s ta"ina increases? a ( ho$e range of pos s ibi$iti es opens up to %ou . =ou can a$( a%s res ort to fas t ani"a$ pu"ping (hen %ou rea$$% (ant to. But $etAs put our attention on 2.E.J.? 2ubt$e Energ% eJchange? and creating a spiritua$ "erger instead of an O$%"pic strength event. The fina$ e7ercises in Chapter 0 are about e7tending %our gro(ing ski$$ to "ore c $o s e $ % re s e "b $ e s po nt an eo us $ ov e "ak in g ( i th ou t s tr uc tu re . In s t ea d of s t op 9 start? (eA$$ no( use the fa"i$iar subt$e adjust"ents to peak and p$ateau? f o $ $ o ( e d b % s e 7 u a $ b r e a t h i n g t o c h a n n e $ e n e r g % u p a n d a ( a % f r o " %o u r h o t spots. +t $ast? IA$$ suggest so"e different se7ua$ positions to p$a% (ith. Exercise: S#$t%e &'(#st)ents !I" 2 ubt$e + dj us t"ents @I= begins j us t $ike the previous e7ercis e in (hich %o u both "oved and stopped (hen necessar% to avoid s$ipping past :.:. ,ere? %o u A $ $ u s e s u b t $ e a d j u s t " e n t s t o g e t %o u r e 7 c i t e " e n t $ e v e $ t o b a c k o f f . O f cours e? thos e changes are different (hen %o uA re ins ide %on i and not us ing a hand or t(o. ; or e7a"p$e? (hi$e %ouAre sti$$ underneath on %our back? %ou can s $ide %our bod% up to( ards %our partnerA s head. Then the ang$e of vajraA s entr% ( i$$ be "ore perpendicu$ar instead of straight up %oni to(ards %our $overAs head. The advantage of this higher ang$e of entr% is that thereAs $ess friction on vajraAs "ore sensitive underside. .o"en $ike this because it increases sti"u$ation on c$io Btheir c$itorisC. O r %o u c a n s h i f t f r o " s t r a i g h t i n a n d o u t s t r o k e s t o c i r c u $ a r o r s i d e 9 t o 9 s i d e rocking "otions. ;or "an% "en? these strokes provide $ess sti"u$ation to

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v aj r aA s s en s i ti ve h ea d. Ci rc u$ ar s t ro kes c an ru b c$ io ( it h %o u r $o ( e r be $$ % or grind %ou r pubic bone on %o ur partnerA s . D effre es pecia$$ % $oves this kind of circu$ar grinding. + nother ( a% to $es s en %o ur e7cite "e nt ( hi$e ins ide %on i is to us e s ha$$o( er s trokes . / ot on$ % do shorter thrus t tanta$i 5e "an % ( o"en? but "oving $es s ( ithout co"p$ete$% (ithdra( ing can he$p %ou $ast $onger. 2 ince the outer third of %oni is "ore sensitive? "an% (o"en prefer these sha$$o(er vajra "otions. ;urther? sha$$o(er thrusts e7cite c$io b% pu$$ing "ore on %oniAs outer (a$$s. The tanta$i5 ing effect of thes e adj us t"ents provides "ore evidence that deep fast pu"ping "a% not be the "ost sti"u$ating for "an% (o"en. .h% do h u " p a ( a % n o n 9 s t o p a n d " a k e %o u r s e $ f c u " E u i c k $ % j u s t b e c a u s e o f s o " e porno9f$ick9inspired fantas%1C >a% on %our back (ith %our partner stradd$ing %ou. 2C +sk if %our partner is read% for vajra and guide hi" to s$o($% penetrate %oni. .hen vaj ra is co"p $ete $ % ins erted? re"a in s ti$$? s i"p$ % fee$ing the s ens ations unti$ %our e7cite"ent begins to $essen. !C +sk %our partner to "ove s$o($% (hi$e %ou "ove as (e$$. 'C Both of %ou shou$d keep co""unicating open$% and freEuent$% about (hatAs going on inside each of %ou. C .hen %ou reach 0? instead of stopping? var% (hat %ouAre doing to reduce the e7cite"ent a fe( points Bfor e7a"p$e? do( n to 'C. 2 $o( do( n? change pos ition a nd di re ct io n? th ru s t "or e s ha $$ o( $ %? or $ ig ht en t he pr es s ur e o f %o u r s tr ok es . Peak $ike this si7 ti"es. 0C 6 epeat subt$e adjus t"ent peaking si7 ti"es at & and then at :. 8C /o(? use subt$e adjust"ents to p$ateau? first at 0? then &? and then : or "ore.

133

If %o u ( ant greater s tructure? tr% the Taois t : and 1 techniEue. Taois t s e7ua$ t e 7 t s r e c o "" e n d t h a t "e n us e "o r e s h a $ $ o ( s t r o k e s t h a n d e e p o n es t o r e t a i n their s e"en (hi$e e7citing their $overs . Thrus t according to the fo$$o( ing regi"en... ! sha$$o( then 1 deep 9 repeat &1 ti"es sha$$o( then 1 deep 9 repeat &1 ti"es : sha$$o( then 1 deep 9 repeat &1 ti"es +s %ou deve$op "ore and "ore "aster%? the Taoists suggest %ou repeat this seEuence (ith 2 deep thrusts instead of 1? and then (ith ! deep thrusts using vajraAs entire $ength instead of 1. .hen %ou can regu$ate %our e7cite"ent $eve$ subt$%? (hatAs to keep %ou fro" going forever- =ouAre rea$$% getting c$ose to graduating no(. Dust a fe( "ore titi$$ating variations ahead. E+ercise* Se+ual Breathing VI" + s %o u A v e d o n e b e f o r e ( i t h s e $ f 9 p $ e a s u r i n g ? %o u r n e 7 t a s s i g n " e n t i s t o u s e se7ua$ breathing to channe$ the energ% throughout %our bod%. 1C >a% on %our back (ith %our partner stradd$ing %ou. 2C + s k if s he is read% for vaj ra and guide hi" to s $o( $ % penetrate %on i. .hen vaj ra is co"p $ete $ % ins erted? re"a in s ti$$? s i"p$ % fee$ing the s ens ations unti$ %our e7cite"ent begins to $essen. !C +sk %our partner to "ove s$o($% (hi$e %ou "ove as (e$$. 'C Both of %ou shou$d keep co""unicating open$% and freEuent$% about (hatAs going on inside each of %ou. C .hen %ou reach 0? instead of stopping? s$o( do(n s$ight$%. Open %our e%es ( ide? inha$e "ore deep$ % into the be$$ %? but this ti"e through the / O2 E? and

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ho$d %our breath. 6e$a7 co"p$ete$% as %ou e7ha$e? visua$i5ing %our se7ua$ fire strea"ing out of vajra? and "oaning (ith p$easure to re$ease energ%. 0C Inha$e again through the nos e? vis ua$i5ing that p$eas urab$e energ% "oving up vajra through %our pe$vis to %our heart and higher. 1se one $ong or severa$ short PC Pu"ps to he$p %ou shoot the energ% up(ards. Peak $ike this si7 ti"es. 0C 6epeat peaking using se7ua$ breathing si7 ti"es at & and then at :. &C /o(? use se7ua$ breathing to p$ateau? first at 0? then &? and then : or "ore. +s %ou get "ore co"fortab$e (ith %our abi$it% to "aintain a high $eve$ of e7cite"ent? %ouA $$ be ab$e to f$oat c$oser and c$os er to :.:. The "ore %ou re$a7 and open to orgas "ic energ%? the "ore %ouA $$ e7perience i"p $os ive orgas "s . =ou (i$$ find that? as %ou $earn to hand$e "ore and "ore energ%? %our point of no return gets higher and higher. E+ercise* 7ifferent )ositions If %ouAve fo$$o(ed "% directions so far? %ouAve been practicing a$"ost e7c$usive$% ( ith %o ur partner on top. If %o u havenA t? I app$aud %ou for "oving ahead at %our o(n pace. 6egard$ess? itAs ti"e to p$a% (ith the other se7ua$ positions a v a i $ a b $ e t o a d v e n t u r e s o " e T a n t r i c s t u d e n t s $ i k e %o u . T h i s e 7 e r c i s e ( i $ $ b e " o r e f r e e f o r " t h a n p r e v i o u s o n e s . + s %o u e 7 p e r i " e n t ? u s e e v e r %t h i n g h e r e that (orks for %ou. B e$o( IAve $isted "u$tip$e variations of the five basic s e7ua$ postures : ( o"an on top? s ide to s ide? "an on top? rear entr%? and facing pos itions . The%A r e arranged in the order that I be$ieve goes fro" $east to "ost sti"u$ating. .hatAs the best order for e7peri"enting- ThereAs no scientific standard? so pa% %our "one% and take %our chances. =ou re"e"ber the o$d joke about the octogenarian at a se7 $ecture (ho %e$$ed fro" the back ro( that heA d tried 1)1 pos tures . + fter the $aughter died do( n and the speaker started describing the "issionar% position? the gee5er ju"ped

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up screa"ing F1)2? 1)2GF .e$$? I probab$% havenAt covered ever% position here? a n d c e r t a i n $ % h a v e n A t d e t a i $ e d t h e e 7 a c t a r r a n g e " e n t o f %o u r $ i "b s i n e a c h c a s e . T h i s e 7 e r c i s e i s i n c $ u d e d t o s t r e t c h %o u r c o "f o r t 5 o n e a r o u n d p o s t u r e s %ou "ight not other( is e e7peri"ent ( ith. .ith pers everance and a $itt$e $uck? %ou j us t "ight find co"bin ations that turn %o ur partner on (hi$e "a inta ining %our e7cite"ent at a "anageab$e $eve$. +s %ou tr% out different postures? keep %our attention focused on %our arousa$ and %ou r se7ua$ energ%. .hich pos itions turn %ou both on the "os t- .hich s t r o k e s p $ e a s e %o u b o t h t h e " o s t i n ( h i c h p o s i t i o n s - I n ( h i c h p o s t u r e s c a n %ou re$a7 the "os t- In ( hich pos itions can %ou s e7ua$$ % breathe 9 rock %ou r p e $ v i s ? b r e a t h e i n t h e b e $ $ %? s E u e e 5 e %o u r P C 9 ( i t h " o s t e f f e c t - . h i c h postures a$$o( %our energ% to f$o( up %our inner f$ute the "ost'oman On To, If %ou havenA t tried thes e options ? e7peri"en t ( ith different pos itions before "oving on... "an f$at on back? (o"an knee$ing over hi"? $eaning for( ard? facing to( ards his head "an f$at on back? (o"an knee$ing over hi" $eaning back "an f$at on back? (o"an sEuatting? bouncing on her feet over hi" "an on back (ith knees bent and hips raised? (o"an in an% of above positions. "an on back? (o"an $a%ing f$at on top of hi" "an on back? (o"an stradd$es hi" facing to(ards his feet Side To Side The advantage of side9to9side positions is that the "an can var% his thrusting (ithout the effort of supporting hi"se$f. +$so? a$$ four hands are free for other sti"u$ation. I rea$$% $ike p$a%ing (ith DeffreAs c$io (hen (eAre "aking $ove in this position... (o"an on back (ith $egs up? "an on side (ith his $egs under hers (o"an on back? "an on side? (ith $egs intert(ined Bscissors positionC (o"an $ies on side (ith $egs dra(n up to(ards chest? "an knee$s behind her

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Man On To, O f c o u r s e ? ( e h a v e t o p r a c t i c e ( i t h t h e " i s s i o n a r % p o s i t i o n . 4 i d %o u r e a $ i 5 e ho( "an % variations there are- Check it out... ( o " a n o n b a c k ? " a n $ a %i n g o n t o p o f h e r ? h i s $ e g s s t r e t c h e d o u t b e t ( e e n hers (o"an on back? "anA s $egs s tretched out bet( een hers? ( eight on his hands ( o"an on back ( ith her $egs s tretched out? "an s Euats ( ith knees together bet(een her $egs ( o"an on back? "an sEuats ( ith knees s pread ( ide ( ith her $egs on top of his thighs (o"an on back (ith $egs bent back? "an on top? her knees or $egs on his chest or shou$ders (o"an on back? "an on top (ith one of her $egs on his chest or shou$ders (o"an on back (ith $egs stretched out? "an on top (ith one of his $egs inside and one outside hers (o"an on back (ith her $egs together (ith "an $%ing on top (o"an on back on side of bed (ith $egs spread? "an standing $eans over her (ear Entry 6ear entr% positions are so"e of the "ost because the (o"anAs $egs are c$oser together s ides . The dis advantage of thes e pos itions difficu$t since %ou canAt "aintain e%e contact. I have to ad"it that IAve never tried the $ast one... e 7 c i t i n g f o r " e . * a %b e t h a t A s creating "ore friction on vajraAs is that co""un icat ion is "ore Being pas t "% g%"nas tic pri"e?

(o"an $%ing f$at on sto"ach? "an $a%s on top of her (o"an $%ing f$at on sto"ach? "an on top (ith $egs on either side of her spooning? "an outside (o"an both $%ing on their sides scissors spooning (ith $egs intert(ined doggie st%$e: both on knees (ith "an behind (o"an $ies face do(n over edge of bed? "an stands behind her (o"an crouches on hands and knees or (ith $egs straight? "an stands behind her and e"br aces her ( ais t ( ith his hands 1acing

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;acing positions are so"e of the "ost de"anding ph%sica$$% but satisf%ing e n e r g e t i c a $ $ %. B % f a c i n g e a c h o t h e r ? i t A s e a s i e r t o a $ i g n %o u r c h a k r a s a n d channe$ %our energ% up(ards. The de$ight of %ab9%u"? the c$assic Tantric $ove"aking position? provides great "otivation to go to the g%" regu$ar$% or deve$op greater f$e7ibi$it% (ith =oga postures. 2peaking of (hich? so"e of these positions are "uch easier (hen sitting on a hard "editation pi$$o( $ike a Dapanese 5afu. IAve never succeeded at the $ast one of these either... %a b 9 %u ": "a n s i t s c r o s s $ e g g e d o r s t r a i g h t $ e g g e d ? ( o "a n o n h i s $ a p ( i t h $egs (rapped around hi" e"bracing his neck (hi$e he e"braces her back a $ t e r n a t e %a b 9 %u ": "a n s i t s c r o s s $ e g g e d o r s t r a i g h t $ e g g e d ? ( o "a n s E u a t s on his $ap (ith $egs supporting her on the f$oor fro" %ab9 %u "? both $ean back propped and support se$ves (ith ar"s behind ::: both $ean back fro" the %ab9%u" position unti$ $a%ing f$at on the back (o"an $eans back propped up b% pi$$o(s (ith $egs outstretched? "an knee$s bet(een her thighs "an sits on an ar"$ess chair? ( o"an stradd$es hi" sitting on his $ap "an sits ( ith $egs outs tretched or crossed? (o"an sits on $ap facing a( a% fro" hi" (o"an sits on edge of bed (ith $egs outstretched or crossed? "an stands and enters her both standing? (ith one of the (o"anAs $egs resting on the "anAs hip =ou see thereAs $ots of arduous practice ahead of %ou... 1C 4iscuss (hich positions %ou (ant to tr% before %ou begin "aking $ove. 2C +fter sensuous touching? "ove into the first position %ou se$ected and? (ith per"ission? insert vajra into %oni. !C 2$o($% "ove together? "onitoring %our arousa$ $eve$? peaking severa$ ti"es at 0? &? and :. 'C If %ou find this posture too arousing? use stop9start? subt$e adjust"ents? and se7ua$ breathing or even ejacu$ation interruption techniEues to avoid going over the top.

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C Tr% other positions? peaking at increasing $eve$s severa$ ti"es. C . h e n %o u f i n d a p o s i t i o n t h a t A s e 7 c i t i n g f o r t h e b o t h o f %o u ? p $ a % ( i t h p$ateauing as $ong as %ou $ike. 8C Is it ti"e to go for si"u$taneous orgas"- =ou decide. 4onAt tr% to practice (ith ever% position and variation during one $ove"aking s ess ion. 6epeat this e7ercise tr%ing s evera$ at a ti"e. .hen %ouA ve e7p$ored t h e " a $ $ ? %o u A $ $ k n o ( ( h a t %o u p r e f e r a n d ( h a t %o u c a n t h r o u g h i n f o r variation at different ti"es. C ongratu$ations on %our advanced $ove"aking ski$$s . B% arriving at this point n e a r t h e e n d o f t h e 1 $ t i " a t e E c s t a t i c 2 o $ u t i o n p r a c t i c e p r o g r a " ? %o u A v e changed %our ski$$s and patterns tre"endous $%. /o( ? at $as t? %ou have the credentia$s to Eua$if% for the secret rites of Tantric $ove"aking B"ost of (hich %ouAve a$read% figured out? I betC. )o, ?ui: ,ereAs %our ticket to "oving on. +ns(er the fo$$o(ing Euestions honest$%: 1C 4o %ou sti$$ so"eti"es fee$ a strong urge to cu"2C 4o %ou fight it or beat %ourse$f up about it!C 4 o %o u kno( ho( to direct the energ % thatA s caus ing this urge up( ard and in(ard (ithout a$(a%s e7p$oding out(ard1C +re %ou read% for dancing (ith a$$ %ou kno( in the a$tered space of continuous rapture/o( $etAs score %our test. I f %o u an s ( e re d %e s t o B 1C ? s c or e 1 po in t. If %o u a ns ( e re d n o? i tA s ha rd f or "e to be$ieve? but score 1 point (ith gusto. If %ou ans(ered %es to B2C? %ou need to practice re$easing %our inner s t r u g g $ e s " o r e . = o u g e t 1 p o i n t f o r k n o ( i n g %o u r s e $ f a n d a n s ( e r i n g honest$%. If %ou ans(ered no? (e$$? again itAs hard to be$ieve but sti$$ score 1 point.

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I If %ou ans( ered %es to B!C? s core 1 point. If %ou ans (ered no? score 1 point for honest%. But I strong$% suggest %ou go back and practice "ore before continuing. 6egard$ess of %our ans(ers to B1C through B!C? %our ans(er to B'C deter"ines ( h e t h e r %o u A r e r e a d % t o " o v e o n t o C h a p t e r 8 . = e s ? t h e % ( e r e a $ $ t r i c k E ue s t io ns . . ou $d %o u e7 pe ct a n % $ es s fr o" "e af te r a$ $ ( eA ve b ee n t hr ou gh together-

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Chapter <: Tantric 'aster$


.e$co"e? "% friend? to the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution. B% arriving here? %ouAve deve$oped a$$ the facu$ties to perfect %our Tantric "aster% of $ove"aking. This chapter is a$$ about the $ast 6 of 6+*PE6? (hich is 6ide the (ave. ItAs a (ave of orgas"ic energ%? of $ove b$iss? of ecstatic de$iriu"? of spiritua$ rapture. O nce %ou e7perienc e it fu$$%? it ( i$$ trans for" %ou r $ife. ItA s on$% fair for "e (arn %o u at this point that %o u (onAt be satisfied (ith pure ani"a$ $ust an %"o re . .hen %o u tas te %ou r connection to the divine? %o uA $$ ( ant to s ta% t he re ? at ho "e s pi ri tu a $$ %? ba s k in g i n th e "i nd $ es s s e re ni t %. 2 or r %? s o"e t i "es I get carried a(a% (a7ing poetic (hi$e tr%ing to describe the indescribab$e e7perience. Though b% this point %ouAre no stranger to (hat Tantra is a$$ about? Chapter 8 presents the Tantric vision in its entiret%. +fter(ards? IA$$ segue into a thorough co"parison of Tan tric $ove"aking (ith ever%da% garden variet% se7? and then r e " i n d %o u a b o u t h o ( t o u s e t h e t o o $ s %o u A v e $ e a r n e d . T h e r e a r e o n $ % t ( o practices in this chapter: preparing for Tantric $ove and e7periencing it. I ca$$ the $ast one the 2hangri9>a e7ercise. ThereAs $itt$e doubt that %ouA$$ (ant to do these again and again and again.

<.1 The Tantra =ision


'%antra is a cult of ecstasy, a personal religion based on the mystical exper ience of oy rather than es tablis hed dogma. (ex is holy to a %antric. It is worship6 it is energizing and life7giving. %an tric art, writings, and religious rituals glorify sex. %an trics are anti7ascetic6 they affirm life. %hey teach the discovery of the divine through the exaltation of the total human. %hey use all of the senses, the mind and the spirit to reach mystic pea)s.' <a"a$a 4evi? The Eastern .a% Of >ove

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'hat Is Tantra& Tantra is an ancient Eas tern s piritua$ s %s t e" of s acred s e7ua$it %. Being a spiritua$ art and practice? Tantra is pri"ari$% a (a% of $ife $eading to deeper "eaning and en$ighten"ent. Tantra accepts a$$ natura$ forces just the (a% the% are. It guides %ou to harness the ra( po(er of $ove and se7 to fue$ higher consciousness and pro"ote transfor"ation. The (ord Tantra co"es fro" the roots Fe7pand? e7tend? and (eave.F Tantrikas e7tend their a(areness ? heighten their s ens itivit %? e7pand their conscious ness ? and (eave a$$ the energies of $ife together to affir" jo%ous $iving. ItAs not a re$igion based on faith? dog"a? or right $iving. 2ince itAs not rea$$% a phi$osoph% either? it has no ru$es ? Eua$ific ations ? or reEuire "en ts . ThereA s no code of behavior? no punis h"en t for s in? and no pot of go$d ( aiting for %o u in the after$ife at the end of the rainbo(. T an tr a i s j us t a na tu ra $ a pp ro ac h to e 7p er ie nc in g ea ch "o "e n t. I t s a %s F = es GF to ever %t hi ng %o u e7perience. To be Tantric? %o u s i"p$ % accept %ou rs e$f as a divine ref$ection? practice s e$f9$ove? and s ho( gratitude for a$$ %o u receive. Tantrikas (e$co"e a$$ as pects of $ife? (hether the%A re fro( ned upon b% societ% o r n ot . + de pt s e7 u$ t in $ iv in g e ac h "o "en t c o"p $e t e $ %? an d pr ac ti ce p $e as ur e as a high9priorit% discip$ine. T a n t r i k a s c e $ e b r a t e s e 7 u a $ i t % a b o v e a $ $ e $ s e . T h e T a n t r i c p a t h e " p $ o %s sensua$it% and erotic p$a% to e7pand consciousness through the transfor"ative p o ( e r o f o r g a s " i c e n e r g %. T a n t r i k a s d e $ i b e r a t e $ % i n d u c e a $ t e r e d s t a t e s o f ecs tas % to create a "%s ti ca $ e7perience of trans cendenta $ oneness ( ith the universe. .e figure? (h% not enjo% ourse$ves (hi$e (eAre evo$vingAncient Tradition Tantra gre( up thous ands of %e ars ago in India? China? and Tibet as a grass 9 roots rebe$$ion agains t the repres s ive re$igions of the da %. Back then? to even reach for en$ighten"ent reEuired $ifeti"es of den%ing desire and doing penance for past9$ife kar"a.

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T a n t r a o p e n e d t h e d o o r s o f s p i r i t u a $ e v o $ u t i o n t o e v e r %o n e . T a n t r i c a d e p t s needed to "as ter 0' ( ide9ranging arts and sciences inc$uding "usic? f$o(er arranging? "arti a$ arts ? dance? "ath e"at ics ? "as s age? bus ines s ? hea$ing? astro$og%? fine arts? a$che"%? and (arfare. The art of $ove (as fore"ost a"ong the". The ear$iest Tantras 9 secret (ritings 9 e7a$ted the cu$t of the god 2hiva? one of the pri"ar% ,indu deities? and his consort? the goddess 2hakti. ,indus be$ieved that 2hakti created the universe b% uniting spiritua$$% and se7ua$$% (ith 2hiva. This erotic $ove creation9"%th certain$% bui$ds different core va$ues than the +da" and Eve stor% that "ost of us $earned as kids. ,ere is just one e7a"p$e of TantraA s prag"atic non9dog"atic approach to $iving. .e borro( "%ths? princip$es? and ritua$s fro" other discip$ines that he$p our inner beings gro(. But (e donAt use the" to judge? grade? or po$ice our behavior. Toda%? Tantrikas revere 2hiva as the pure e"bodi"ent of the "ascu$ine force c u$ "i na t in g in c os "i c c on s c io us ne s s ? an d 2 ha kt i a s t he f e"i n in e pr in ci p$ e e"bod %i ng pure creativ e energ%. This is nA t ( ors hip of supre"e beings as in other re$igions. 6ather? itAs our (a% of honoring the forces of nature that e7ist ( i t h i n a $ $ o f u s . . e s i " p $ % u s e 2 h i v a a n d 2 h a k t i a s c o n v e n i e n t s %" b o $ s t o focus the gro(th of our o(n divine Eua$ities. In short? Tantrikas honor our inner "a$e or fe"a$e regard$ess of our bio$ogica$ gender. 'a#e ., And Smell The (oses Tantra is about $iving $ife to its fu$$est. The heart and sou$ of Tantra is raising consciousness. Tantra teaches us to be "ore and "ore a(are of our connection (ith a$$ things. 2o "an% peop$e are s(ept through $ife $ooking at pictures in the "ind instead of $iving "o"ent to "o"ent. The% spend their consciousness b% d(e$$ing on the past? p$otting the future? and co"paring the current state of affairs to a set of pre9recorded subconscious tapes. To counteract this progra""ing? Tantra teaches us to pa% "ore attention and focus our "inds on the present. Tantra teaches us to be supre"e$% conscious o f e v e r %t h i n g t h a t h a p p e n s ( h i $ e ( e ( a t c h a n d e nj o %. T a n t r a t e a c h e s us t o e7ist in this "o"ent? beco"e tota$$% absorbed in the Fno(?F and open our

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(indo(s to the (or$d fu$$%. .e do this b% heightening our five senses 9 sight? s"e$$? taste? touch? and hearing. .e beco"e dedicated to enjo%ing the ph%sica$ fu$$% b% reve$ing in eating? drinking? "assaging? dancing? and "aking $ove. But even "ore? (eAre ta$king about kno(ing ourse$ves and the (or$d around us as "ore than just "ateria$ she$$s. In Tantra? co"p$ete honest% and authenticit% about our truth is essentia$ for spiritua$ gro(th. .e $earn to o bs e rv e o ur s e $v es ? a cc ep t th e ( is do " o f ou r he ar t? an d s h in e b ri gh t $i gh t on our inner kno( ing. This kind of s piritua$ evo$ution can on$% $ead each of us to a c$earer idea of our deeper se$ves 9 (ho (e rea$$% are. If (e get to kno( ourse$ves better? ( i$$ the truth rea$$% s et us free- .hat (i$$ (e find underneath a$$ those $a%ers of o$d baggage hiding the rea$ inner se$f"our 2atural Self Tantra be$ieves that our essentia$ "ake9up is $ove and that our true nature is b$is s fu$. Ins ide each of us is a s pontaneous ? jo %o us ? p$a %f u$ ? chi$d$ike s pirit ( h o ( a n t s t o b e f r e e t o s a v o r e v e r %t h i n g a n d $ o v e e v e r %o n e . I n a d d i t i o n t o being artistic? creative? and po(erfu$? Tantrikas practice the reve$ation that hu"ans are funda"enta$$% s e7ua$ beings . .e honor s e7 as a ce$ebration of $ife and a desire to "erge our sou$s (ith each other. .h% donAt "ost of us behave that (a% if thatAs our basic nature- *odern .estern upbringing doesnAt teach us these under$%ing va$ues of se$f9$ove and enjo%"ent of $ife. Instead? (eAre "ade unnatura$ b% socia$ conditioning and b% "ora $ codes that donA t s erve our inherent "ake9 up. + $$ thes e doA s and donA ts produce inner strugg$es against our basic desires. . ha t c an ( e do ab ou t o ur up br in gi ng- Ta nt ra an s ( ers : be c ons ci ou s of ( ho (e are and (hat (e (ant. 6ecogni5e (hich desires spring fro" our inner beings and (hich have been i"pres s ed on us . 4 onA t res is t hea$th % i"pu $s es ( h i c h ( o u $ d i n h i b i t o u r v i t a $ s p i r i t f r o " e "e r g i n g i f ( e a v o i d e d t h e ". 2 h e d the s ocia$ conventions that bring us do( n and re$eas e the brain( as hing that doesnAt serve us. If (e fo$$o( an i"pu$se thatAs not part of our essentia$ nature? (e $earn fro" these e7peri"ents to drop it. If (e find great satisfaction

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i n ( h a t ( e p u r s u e ? ( e c a n o n $ % c o n c $ u d e t h a t ( e A v e d i s c o v e r e d "o r e o f o u r persona$ truth. .estern societ% artificia$$% separates our inner "ascu$ine and fe"inine Eua$ities b % dis couraging their deve$op "ent. * en are taught? for e7a"p $e? to hide their fe"inini t %. Tantra encourages each gender to cu$tivate the $atent energies of the other. If "en seek their intrinsic truths on the Tantric path? the%A$$ invariab$% discover their soft? receptive? sensitive? and vu$nerab$e side? (ithout $osing their "ascu$init%. .o"en (i$$ discover their strong $eadership? d%na"ic initiative? and teaching po(ers (hi$e retaining their fe"ininit%. These ne( Eua$ities add to the strengths consistent (ith our outer gender (hich (eAve a$read% $earned to e7ercise. Instead of creating a picture princip$e that the (a% out is s t r e s s e s t h a t c o " e o u r ( a %. a$$o(ing our innate forces discover that the truth (i$$ set us 3ust Acce,t It@ Baby Tantra sa%s =E2G to $ife. It accepts ever%thing and forbids nothing. =ou (onAt find "ora$ judg"ents here about right and (rong or good and bad. ItAs out$ook is one of (ho$eness? e"bracing opposites as aspects of the sa"e thing. .e re co gn i5 e th at j udg "en ts $ ik e go od an d ba d a re b as ed o n a rt if ic i a $ %a r ds t ic ks he $d f as t in ou r s ub co ns ci oi us "in ds . T o ca s t o ff th is p ro gr a""i n g? ( e $ ea rn to $ive in har"on% (ith (hatever $ife serves up? (hether on a si$ver p$atter or bed of thorns. ThatAs part$% (h% Tantrikas "ajor in surrender 9 just $etting things happen of their o( n accord (ithout res is tance. .eAve given up the into7icating i$$usion that (e can contro$ the outside (or$d. Tantra s a %s if ( e suppres s natura$ inner forces ? the% ( onA t dis appear? the %A $$ just fester and then insinuate their (a% to the surface in an unhea$th% "anner. Tantra teaches us to e"brac e a$$ parts of ours e$ves and ever%th ing that befa$$s us . I f ( e d o n A t b u % o t h e r A s "o r a $ c o d e s t h a t c o n f $ i c t us ? ( h a t A s t h e r e t o h i d e If thereAs no good and bad? (h% not just drop gui$t- If thereAs no right or of ho( (eAre supposed to be? (e operate on the the (a% through. .e fu$$% confront the jo%s and +bove a$$ e$se? (e re$a7 and go (ith the f$o(? to run their course. .e (atch and $earn and free.

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(rong? (h% not re$ease a$$ sha"e- If ever%thing in $ife is divine? (hatAs there to fear- If 3od is $ove? (h% canAt (e e7perience heaven on earth.e donA t fight? res is t? or rej ect things . That kind of pers ona$ s uppress ion can on$% produce "enta$ (arfare and interna$ stress. .e re$ease a$$ stress as a use$ess strugg$e (ith no (inners? on$% $osers. .e $et go of the futi$e atte"pt to stop things that are happening fro" happening. *a%be thatAs (hat Dohn >ennon (as singing about in F>et It Be.F +s a resu$t? (e have to $earn to accept constant change. .hat (e discover thatAs right for us no( "a% not be the ne7t "o"ent. +nd vice versa. .hatAs right for others 9 no "atter ho( "uch (e env% the" 9 "a% be (rong for us. +nd vice versa =ou see (h% Tantra doesnAt estab$ish dog"a? ru$es? or behaviora$ codes- ,o( cou$d (e fo$$o( prescribed patterns if (eAre responding to $ife genuine$ % in ever% uniEue "o"ent- + $$ ( e can do is ris k? e7p$ore? observe? $isten? and notice? choosing (hat brings us jo% and gro(th and $eaving the rest behind. This ( ho$e approach to $ife s ugges ts ( e shou$d jus t give up goa$ orientat ion? enter each e7perience (ithout e7pectations? and just $ive fu$$% in each "o"ent. But to $ove $ife and others reEuires that (e accept one funda"enta$ truth 9 even ( ith a$$ our judg"ents about our s hortco"ings ? ( eA re perfect the ( a % ( e are. .eA re never going to arrive at s o"e i "agined s tate of perfection. O ur journe% is just e7act$% the (a% it needs to be. The Body Tem,le T h e k e % t o j o %o u s $ i v i n g i s f i r s t $ o v i n g o u r s e $ v e s . T h i s b e g i n s ( i t h a n e7ceeding$% difficu$t assign"ent? accepting our bodies the (a% the% are no(. ,ereAs another great e7a"p$e of TantraAs nove$ approach to $ife. The "edia and "as s cons cious nes s ? having created the vis ion of the perfect for"? encourages us to fi$$ ours e$ves fu$$ of negative j udg"ents about our anato"%. Tantrikas choose not to fa$$ for these fa$se standards? instead cherishing our bodies as the te"p$es of our sou$s.

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In contrast to other re$igions that vie( the p$easures of the f$esh as degraded or evi$? Tantra recogni5es that our ph%sica$ for"s are a divine gift. These she$$s house our spirit and $et our inner beings e7perience the sights? sounds? and s "e $ $s o f th e p h %s i ca $ ( or $d . 6 eg ar d$ es s o f th ei r s i 5e ? s h ap e? or c o$ or ? o ur bodies deserve our unconditiona$ $ove and affection just for $etting us de$ight in a$$ these de$icious sensations. ;urther? the% he$p us think? co""unicate? "ove? and act. ; ace it? s e7 ( ou$dnA t be "uch fun at a$$ ( ithout a bod %. 4onA t %ou think $ife (ou$d be "uch du$$er if (e (ere a$$ dise"bodied spirits2 o T a n t r i k a s h o n o r t h e i r b o d i e s . T h a t i n c $ u d e s $ o o k i n g a f t e r t h e "? f e e d i n g the " proper$%? and e7ercis ing the ". .e be$ieve one path to 3 od is b% $oving these ph%s ica$ gifts and cheris hing a$$ the% e7perience. .hich is (h% p$easure is such a centra$ driving force in Tantric practice. )leasure 1irst Tantrikas be$ieve in enjo%ing $ife to the fu$$est. 4eferred gratification isnAt part of the "inds et. Be good? earn %o ur ticket to heaven? and %ou A $$ be re( arded in the ne7t $ife just doesnAt fit in. Tantra is the true art of $iving in (hich p$easure no( beco"es the centra$ t he "e in e ac h "o "en t . .h ic h i s ( h % f or "o s t o f us ? e "b r ac i ng t he T an tr ic path reEuires a shift in priorities. .e have to put p$easure first and "ake space in our bus% $ives to appreciate? enjo%? and be happ%. This isnA t as eas % as it sounds. It reEuires "ore than jus t reserving p$a %ti"e in our stuffed ca$endars. .eAve got to $earn to cu$tivate ecstas%? to surrender to s ens ation? and to pursue p$easure ( ith gusto. D ust (hen (e s tart fee$ing good? "an% of us are conditioned to fee$ (eAre being se$fish? having too "uch fun? or donA t des erve it. .eA ve got to un$earn the gui$t and res is tance thatA s bred into us. Our bodies need to $earn that p$easure is their birthright. .e start b% recogni5ing that (eAre each tota$$% responsib$e for our o(n p$easure. ItAs not up to our "ate? our boss? or the (eather. .e begin to cu$tiva te fee$ing good b % opening our s ens es fu$$ % and f$ooding the " ( ith sti"u$i. .e continue b% savoring the fee$ings the% bring. .e e"p$o% the

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bedrock of Tantra? practicing p$easure. =es? (e teach ourse$ves to increase our capacit% to enjo%? accept "ore and "ore sensation? and va$ue it "ore through Tantric practice. ThatAs (h% our teacher? *argot +nand? is so fond of sa%ing Fp$easure is a discip$ine.F /o( can %ou see (here se7 fits into the Tantric sche"e of things as the biggest teacher and fue$ for transfor"ationThe Art And Science Of Se+ In Tantra? se7 is an art and a science. .e e7p$ore it fu$$% and co"prehensive$%? i""ersing ourse$ves fu$$% just $ike (e do (ith ever% other part of $ife. Of course? this is a "ajor cha$$enge (ith arguab$% the "ost repressed aspect of "odern $ife. >earning the fu$$ appreciation of s e7 teaches us to de$ight in our bodies and (e$co"e p$easure. Engaging in uninhibited se7 reEuires gro(th fro" a$$ of us (hoAve gro(n up in the "odern (or$d. .e carr% "ore "ora$i5ing? sha"e? gui$t? and an7iet % into the bedroo " than an%( her e e$s e in our $ives . If ( e $earn to fu$$% e"bra ce s e7ua$ p$eas ure? ( e e "bod % the idea$s of a Tantric $ife. If %ou can beco"e fu$$ % natura$ and s pontaneous ( ith s ens ua$ p$a %? then %ou can probab$% do it (ith an% of $ifeA s forces . ThatA s (h% eroticis " p$a%ed such a funda"enta$ ro$e in ancient TantraAs 0' +rts. Through conscious practice? Tantrikas beco"e better $overs. Our e7perience de ep en s a nd o pe ns n e( $ ev e$ s of i nt i "a te co ""u n io n. .e h ea $ ou r ( ou nd s ? $ose our inhibitions? and re$ease our inner b$ocks b% seeking higher and higher states of ecstas%. Our erections beco"e stronger? (e "ake $ove $onger? and (e e7perience bigger and better pro$onged orgas"s. Tantra ( as nA t des igned as therap % for our s e7ua$ hang9ups and $i "i tations ? it j u s t s o "e t i " e s t u r n s o u t t h a t ( a %. . h e n ( e r e $ a 7 ? e 7 e r c i s e o u r e r o g e n o u s 5ones? and enjo% our bodies? (e often run into the o$d baggage that b$ocks our e7cite"ent. .e dis cover that o$d pains? (ounds ? and trau"a are s tored in our tissues. Instead of focusing on prob$e"s? Tantric practice hea$s pure$% through

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the co""it te d purs uit of p$eas ure. B % opening our energ% channe$s ? ( e ( ork through an% resistance that surfaces. .eAre $eft c$eansed? re$a7ed? and free. T h o u g h T a n t r i k a s b e c o "e h i g h $ % s k i $ $ e d $ o v e r s ? T a n t r a i s n o t d i r e c t $ % a b o u t se7ua$ techniEues. ItAs "ore "editation than ath$etics. .e fo$$o( no set p a t t e r n ( i t h o u t e 7 p e c t a t i o n s o r "e a s u r a b $ e g o a $ s . . e d o n A t r u s h t h r o u g h forep$a % to get to the "ain act and judge success in the sack b% "aking our partner cu". Instead? itAs about 2.E.J.? (hich "eans 2ubt$e Energ% eJchange. 1 $ t i " a t e $ %? 2 . E . J . i s a n % t o u c h i n g ? " o v i n g ? o r " e d i t a t i n g t o g e t h e r t h a t connects $oversA inner vibrations. .e operate on a different p$ane than just the genita$ friction of intercourse. Communication Tantric se7 uses the sa"e bod% parts and ph%sica$ actions? but unfo$ds "uch different$% than the average Euickie hurt$ing do(nhi$$ to e7p$osive re$ease. ItAs s $o( ? s po nt an eo us ? an d c on s c io us . It A s o pe n? in ti "a t e ? an d "u tu a $. I t "or e c$ose$% res e"b$es a tea" sport $ike footba$$ or bas ketba$$ than individua$ perfor"ances $ike g%"nastics or sprint s(i""ing. Tantric $overs kno( that the%Are each responsib$e for their o(n p$easure. The% recogni5e that erotic e7periences begin (ithin. The% kno( (hat the% $ike? (hat the% (ant in the "o "en t? and (hat the%A d prefer to $eave out of each encounter. The% ask for (hat the% (ant? voice their reactions? and give $ots of f ee db ac k. + nd th e % do it i n a ( a % th at en ha nc es i nt i "a c % a nd co nt ri bu te s to the sensua$ "ood. ThereAs no agenda to Tantric $ove p$a%. ItAs a$$ about fee$ing p$easure? nothing "ore and nothing $ess. 2ince (e have no goa$ of giving or receiving orgas"? Tantrikas enter into sacred se7 (ithout e7pectations. Perfor"ance an7iet% 9 a " I d o i n g i t r i g h t - 9 d i s a p p e a r s a $ o n g ( i t h a n % " %s t e r % a b o u t ( h a t A s h a p p e n i n g ( i t h o u r p a r t n e r s . I t A s " o r e $ i k e s %n c h r o n i 5 e d s ( i " " i n g ( i t h te$epathic co""unication. O bvious $%? this kind of authentic interp$a % reEuires kno( ing? accepting? and $oving %o urs e $f fu$$ % firs t. Then %o u can be s crupu$ous $ % hones t? tota$$ % rea$?

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a n d r e f r e s h i n g $ % t r a n s p a r e n t ( i t h %o u r i n n e r " o s t d e s i r e s . . h i c h $ e a d s t o kno(ing? accepting? and $oving %our be$oved. T o o "a n % o f us j u d g e o u r p a r t n e r s a c c o r d i n g t o s o "e h i d d e n i n n e r p i c t u r e o f the perfect $over. .hen a "an isnAt a(are of his inner fe"a$e? he tends to unconscious$% project standards and reEuire"ents on to his partner. +nd the reverse is true for (o"en. .hen (e each inti"ate$% kno( our interna$ opposite gender? our inner "a$e and fe"a$e can accept? honor? and $ove each other. On$% then can (e fu$$% e"brace our outer be$oved unconditiona$$%. Energy Is 6ife 1orce Tantric se7 is about "astering energ%? the vita$it% of $ife. Ever%thing in the ph %s ica $ univers e is in "otion due to energ% f$o( ing. The ce$$s in our bodies ? the b$ood in our veins? the e$ectrica$ i"pu$ses in our nerves a$$ continuous$% vibrate inside. Energ% is the ph%sica$ osci$$ations that our bodies fee$ a$$ the ti"e. If not for fee$ing energ% "oving? ho( (ou$d (e beco"e a(are of being turned on? angr%? nervous ? or in $ove- .e fee$ energetic s ens ations in our bod%: the heat that s p re ad s in ( a ve s ? th e ar ou s a $ th at ra is es go os e b u"ps ? t he t in g$ es an d ti ck $e s that titi$$ate. T h e e n e r g % T a n t r i k a s ( o r k ( i t h i s t h e n e r v o u s s t i " u $ a t i o n a n d p h %s i c a $ e7citation that causes these fee$ings. The stronges t energ% that "ost peop$e e7perience is jus t before an orgas ". 2 o (e often target Forgas "ic energ %F in our e7ercises and ritua$s. But itAs a$$ the sa"e e$ectrica$ and "agnetic $ife force in our bodies. Tantra teaches heightened a(areness of these subt$er? finer freEuencies. *ost peop$e donA t notice the " becaus e their receivers havenA t been tuned to pick the " up. ThatA s part$ % ( h% ( e de$ight in e7p$oring our s ens es of tas te? s ight? s "e$ $? and s ound as ( e$$ as deeper appreciation of s ens ua$ touch. Becaus e e n e r g % f $ o ( s ( h e r e a t t e n t i o n g o e s ? ( e $ e a r n t h a t o u r c o ns c i o u s n e s s b e c o "e s our "ost po(erfu$ energ% focusing too$. .e $earn to harness these subt$e

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vibrations 9 guiding the f$o(s? channe$ing the energ% 9 (hich u$ti"ate$% beco"e po(erfu$ tida$ (aves of ecstas%. In China itAs ca$$ed chi, in India itAs ca$$ed prana, in Dapan itAs ca$$ed )i, but itAs a $$ en er g %. .e A r e ta $k in g a bo ut t he s a"e $i fe fo rc e th at pe rv ad es o ur bo di es ? "inds? and sou$s. Tantra teaches that energ% is generated and stored in each of our seven chakras. Chakras are centers or vortices inside the bod% fro" the botto" of the spine to the top of the head (here subt$e energ% is generated? co$$ected? and stored. +t each center? the energ% s(ir$s (ith different Eua$ities. .hen ( e ta$k about orgas "ic energ%? ( eA re referring to vibrations of the s e7 chakra at the pe$vic f$oor. + t the heart? itA s the ( ar" e"bra ce of $ove. In the brain? it fue$s higher a( arenes s . + t the cro( n? it connects us to the s piritua$ p$ane. This raises the Euestion of (h% Tantrikas refer to se7 as sacred. Sacred Se+ Though itA s on$% one of as pect? Tantra is often referred to as sacred s e7ua$it %. Is it because Tantric practice is a (a% to bring se7ua$it% into har"on% (ith s p i r i t u a $ i t %- I s i t b e c a u s e ( e t r e a t $ o v e p $ a % a n e 7 p r e s s i o n o f s p i r i t - I s i t because (e vie( se7ua$ $ove as a sacra"ent and sacred union- =es? but thereAs "ore. Tantrikas "ake $ove on "u$tip$e $eve$s: se7? heart? and spirit. ThatAs ho( (e connect $ust? $ove? and the divine. .e can ca$$ that kind of se7 spiritua$? (e can ca$$ it inti"ate co""union? or (e can ca$$ it "editation. *erging energies brings us c$oser to our intrinsic ho$istic nature. T h e "o " e n t o f o r g a s " i s t h e c $ o s e s t "o s t p e o p $ e c o "e t o c o "" u n i o n ( i t h their inner being and 3odO3 oddes s . Tantra teaches that this e7perience is a b r i e f g $ i "p s e i n t o o u r t r u e d i v i n e n a t u r e : e c s t a t i c i n t h e b o d %? c o "p a s s i o n a t e in the heart? e"pt % in the "ind? b$is s fu$ in the spirit. To get a tas te of this e7a$ted condition? jus t i "agine the po( erfu$ e7perience of pro$onged and "u$tip$e orgas"s. .e be$ieve en$ightened beings $ike Buddha or Desus $ived in this state of continuous orgas" (ith the entire universe (ithout se7ua$ arousa$.

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T ha tA s ( h % Ta nt ri c r it ua $ of te n i nc $u de s ho no ri ng ea ch ot he r a s re f$ ec t io ns o f the divine. .e choose to $ook through the outer she$$ and see into ourse$ves and our be$oved as a 3od or 3oddess. 2e7 is sacred because (e treat it as a divine gift. .e approach $ove p$a% as if entering a ho$% te"p$e. .e enter into Tantric ritua$ as a path to $iberation of bod%? "ind? and spirit. Ecstasy Orgasm .e a$$ bui$d up s e7ua$ tens ion in our bodies . Cons eEuent$ %? untrained $overs too often treat se7 as a (a% to re$ieve this pressure and b$o( off stea". These "ini9e7p$osions re$ease energ% Euick$% in a fe(9second f$ash of p$easure. ThereAs nothing (rong (ith a hot Euickie no( and then. But? e7p$osive orgas "? "ore so for "en (hen acco"panied b% ej acu$ation? often drains $overs of their vita$ essence. + t%pica$ non9Tantric orgas" is "ore $ike a $itt$e snee5e than fire(orks "oving heaven and earth. Through Tantric practice. orgas" beco"es a "uch different e 7 p e r i e n c e . I t b e c o "e s a s a c r e d e n e r g % e v e n t ? s e p a r a t e f r o " e n e r g % r e $ e a s e and ph%s ica$ ej acu$ation. Ins tead of thro(ing it a( a% in a Euick burs t? Tantra teaches us to uti$i5e and rec%c$e se7ua$ energ% as the ra( "ateria$ that creates divine ecstas% and higher consciousness. T a n t r i k a s c u $ t i v a t e t h e e c s t a t i c r e s p o n s e ? ( h i c h %o u " i g h t c a $ $ t h e i n n e r n e r v o u s s %s t e " o r g a s " . B % c o n s e r v i n g a n d c h a n n e $ i n g o r g a s " i c e n e r g % (ithin? Tantrikas e7perience $ong9$asting i"p$osive orgas"s. Instead of discharging? the energ% i"p$odes? f$ooding the entire bod% (ith pu$sing orgas"ic contractions and continuous (ave$ike vibrations. .e shake a$$ over? engu$fed in surge after surge of pure $iEuid fire. Because se7ua$ energ% is conserved instead of e7pended? these strea"s of ecstas% can go on and on and higher and higher. In fact? "an % Tantric adepts can generate and f$o( this energ% (ithout se7ua$ sti"u$ation. In these g$i"pses of a higher di"ension? (e enter a ti"e$ess void and see" to beco"e one (ith the universe. .e fee$ our bodies? "inds? and spirits "erging ( ith our be$oved. .e enter an a$tered s tate of a( arenes s . In this rapture? it see"s as if our ph%sica$ $i"itations disappear and (e f$oat (ith a$$ boundaries

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disso$ved. 2udden$% (eAre open to f$o(ing pure positive energ% fro" our innate b$is s fu$ source. .e beco "e a conduit for co ""union bet( een earth and sk %? the ph%sica$ and the spiritua$. +chieving this state is the focus of Tantric practice. .e $earn to find true ecstas% (ithin b% re$a7ing into high states of arousa$. .e channe$ the $ife force that se7ua$it% generates and e7pand the energ% up our inner f$utes? the subt$e path( a % that connects our chakras . .e ( eave the es s ence of a$$ our centers 9 bod%? "ind? spirit 9 into ho$istic union (ith a$$ that is. This is true b$iss? being at one (ith the universe. Se+ As Meditation * a %b e thatA s (h % Tantrikas des cribe s e7 as "edit ation. * editation is s i"p$ % s i t t i n g a n d e " p t %i n g t h e " i n d . 2 i n c e %o u c a n A t f o r c e t h o u g h t s a ( a %? t h i s i s "ore cha$$eng ing than it s ounds . Over the "i $$enn ia? gurus have deve$oped "an % "editation techniEues fro" reciting "antras to (atching the breath to ( itnes s ing ideas f$oating b %. The % a$$ s eek to create a deep inner peace fi$$ed (ith sti$$ness. .e ca$$ this presence a Fno "indF condition. Tantrikas (ho cu$tivate the continuous state of inner orgas" find the"se$ves dra(n to this "editative state natura$$%. To encourage the no9"ind condition? Tantric p$a% begins (ith ritua$ to prepare the "ind and bod% for co"p$ete re$a7ation. .e enter Tantric practice (ithout goa$s or e7pectations? surrendering to (hatever unfo$ds. +$$ of this creates the non9resistant "ood in (hich (e can conscious$% su""on energ% to f$o( through us. .e "ight sa% the Tantric "otto is: e"pt% the "ind and $et se7 beco"e a ti"e$ess b$issfu$ "editation. Transformation In its essence? Tantra is a path of transfor"ation. .e transfor" ourse$ves? our s e7ua$it %? our $ife? our re$ations hip. .e $earn to co "e fro" a p$ace of $ove instead of fear? fro" gratitude instead of resistance fro" surrender instead of contro$. B% beco"ing "ore natura$? (e gro( to(ards true spiritua$ $iberation.

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* o d e r n s o c i e t % c o n d i t i o n s u s t o $ i v e i n o u r "i n d s . . e A v e $ o s t t h e a b i $ i t % t o s i "p $ % F b e . F . e n e e d t o r e $ e a r n h o( t o b e a n e "p t % v e s s e $ t h a t $ e t s p $ e a s u r e in. .e need a (a% that re"inds us that our ver% nature is b$issfu$. *an% ca$$ Tantra the fast track to en$ighten"ent because (e go (ith the f$o(? (e$co"ing (hatever erupts (ithin us? good and bad. Instead of stuffing e"erging forces? (e (ork (ith (hatAs a$ive and perco$ating no(. 2ince "an% of us have repressed these po(erfu$ natura$ urges? se7ua$it% beco"es an acce$erated door(a% to transcendence. 3oddess kno(s? "ost of us are b ri ""i n g ( i th s o "u ch s e7 ua $ en er g % t ha t ( e h av e an a$ "os t un $i "i t ed f ue $ for transfor"ation. 1sing this po(erfu$ $ife force as a cata$ %s t? (e e7pand? e7tend? and (eave a$$ our energies into a unified (ho$e. ;o$$o(ing the Tantric path opens a (ho$e ne( di"ension of $ife. .e $earn "ore of our under$%ing identit% and get in c$ose touch (ith our persona$ truth. B% confronting (hatever inside b$ocks (e run into? (e re$ease o$d baggage? open (ithout reservation? and free the f$o( of pure $ife force. B% practicing p$easure as a discip$ine? (e train ourse$ves to $ive the (a% 3od intended? in ecstatic har"on% (ith the universe. 6e$ationships undergo so"e of the "ost dra"atic changes through Tantric practice. B % rekind$ing the f$a"e of des ire? s e7ua$ p$a % beco"es into7ica ting a g a i n . B % r a i s i n g c o n s c i o u s n e s s a n d s h a r i n g "o r e ? i n t i " a c % d e e p e n s . B % gro(ing individua$$%? partners understand each other better and gro( c$oser in $ove. So 'hat Is Tantric )ractice& *a%be itAs c$earer no( (h% (e sa% Tantra isnAt a set of be$iefs or phi$osophies. ItA s a path of e7perience. .ithout an% s tandard of ho( ( e s hou$d behave or think? Tantra $ets our under$%ing se$ves unfo$d. Practice is the heart and sou$ of Tantra. Tantric practices are e7ercises and ritua$s that open energ% path( a%s ? heighten s ens itivit %? and rais e a( arenes s . The% e"p$o% ever%da% actions $ike "oving? breathing? concentrating? and

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touching? but (ith "ore conscious focus. The%Are $ike routines %ou $earn at the g %" . O n c e %o u "a s t e r t h e b a s i c p a t t e r n ? "o r e a n d " o r e r e p e t i t i o n s d e v e $ o p %our intrinsic ta$ent. T o b e g i n ( i t h ? s t r u c t u r e d r o u t i n e s a r e h e $ p f u $ b e c a u s e o $ d "i n d a n d b o d % patterns often interfere ( ith %ou r s pontaneous evo$ution. P as t e7periences ? t r a u " a s ? a n d f i 7 e d i d e a s o f r i g h t a n d ( r o n g c r e a t e p h %s i c a $ b $ o c k s i n %o u r tissues (hich produce resistance to progress. 4iscip$ined patterns are usefu$ at the outset as a defined path to (ork through "enta$? e"otiona$? and ph%sica$ barriers. But structured Tantric practices are on$% a te"porar% too$ to g e t %o u " o v i n g o n t h e r i g h t t r a c k . T h e u $ t i " a t e T a n t r i c t e c h n i E u e i s spontaneit%. To go further and deeper into %o urs e $f? reading? s tud%in g? and ta$king ( onA t take %ou ver % far. =ouA ve got to engage in routine Tantric practice. .hich " e a n s %o u n e e d t o " a k e s p a c e i n % o u r $ i f e f o r T a n t r a . I f d o n e r e g u $ a r $ % ? d%na"ic "editations can he$p open %our energ% channe$s. B.e can reco ""end s evera$ ( ith ins piring "us i c on C4 .C The s ervices of Tantra + t T a h o e c a n g e t %o u s t a r t e d . O u r T a n t r i c I n i t i a t i o n s a r e p r i v a t e t r a i n i n g s t h a t can rapid$% ju"p9start %ou on the road to transfor"ation. Once (e $earn the funda"enta$s? se7 beco"es "editation and Tantric $ove"aking beco"es transfor"ative. .hen spiritua$ (ork beco"es p$easurab$e p $ a %? t h e r e A s n o t u r n i n g b a c k . T h e n ( h % ( o u $ d ( e ( a n t t o - 2 i n c e ( e A r e enjo%ing our F(orkF tre"endous$%? thereAs $itt$e doubt that (eA$$ continue and evo$ve Euick$%. .e hope %ou enjo% the journe% as "uch as (e do.

<.2 Tantric :ove Pla$


4onAt get "e (rong? a$$ kinds of se7 are great. 6e"e"ber? (e define 2.E.J. as 2 ubt$e Energ % eJ change. In the en$ighten ed vie( ? an % cons enting s e7 is good s e7. That cou$d s i"p$ % be sens uous "as sage or sharing "enta$ fantasies . 2o (hen I e7to$ the ce$estia$ virtues of Tantric >ove P$a%? donAt think that I "ean to

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j u d g e o t h e r k i n d s o f p $ a % n e g a t i v e $ %. I t A s a n o t h e r o p t i o n t h a t o p e n s t o t h e Tantric adept? a$beit a fantastic one. Tantric >ove P$a% is "ore $ike sensuous$% sipping an e7pensive Cabernet than chugging a s i79pack of bre( . It "ore res e"b$ es s a"p$ing the de$icac ies at a gour"et buffet than inha$ing a pepperoni pi55a during *onda% /ight ;ootba$$. It A s ce rt ai n $ % "o re $i ke a t ( i $i gh t s tr o$ $ t hr ou gh a p er fu "e d g ar de n d ur in g 2pring (ith %our be$oved on %our ar" than running a hundred9%ard dash. T a n t r i c > o v e P $ a % i s $ e i s u r e $ %? s a v o r i n g e v e r % d e $ i c i o u s "o r s e $ o f p $ e a s u r e ? instead of rushing head$ong to(ards "a7i"u" turn9on no(. Tantric $overs "ove s o s $o( $%? s topping freEuent$ % to s ett$e deep$% into the ris ing tide of p$eas ure? s tretching the e7perience out as $ong as pos s ib$e. 6e$eas ing tens ion and giving in to the urge to cu" gets rep$aced ( ith continuous s trea"ing vibrations of ecstatic energ%. .hen (e enter the a$tered state of consciousness that co"es ( ith repeated i"p$os iv e orgas "s ? ( e s i"p $ % ( ant to f$oat upon a c$oud of b$iss together. >etAs co"pare /or"a$ 2e7 (ith Tantric >ove P$a% in detai$... /or"a$ 2e7 is a pure$% ph%sica$ event (ith the goa$ of re$easing tension and s e "e n . T a n t r i c > o v e P $ a % i s a s p i r i t u a $ "e d i t a t i o n f o c u s e d o n c o n t i n u i n g p$easure. /or"a$ 2e7 rushes head$ong to(ards an e7p$osive orgas". Tantric >ove P$a% generates "u$tip$e continuous fu$$9bod% i"p$osive orgas"s (hich so"eti"es cu$"inate in an earth9shattering si"u$taneous e7p$osion. /or"a$ 2e7 targets the genita$s? bui$ding and re$easing energ% Euick$% in one e7p$os ive peak. Tantric >ove P $a % a( akens the (ho$e bod % s $o( $%? "ov ing energ% up the chakras to reach higher and higher p$ateaus and energi5e the spiritua$ centers. /or"a$ 2e7 begins (ith goa$s and e7pectations? often creating frustration and p e r f o r "a n c e a n 7 i e t %. T a n t r i c > o v e P $ a % i s s p o n t a n e o u s ? ( i t h o u t p a t t e r n ? responding to the (hi"s of the "o"ent.

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/or"a$ 2e7 is often Euiet (ith fast? sha$$o( breathing. Tantric >ove P$a% is verba$? nois%? and sti"u$ated b% s$o( deep be$$% breathing. / or"a$ 2 e7 is tens e? often c$os ed and private? and reEuires fas t pu"p ing to avoid $osing the "ood or the erection. Tantric >ove P$a% is re$a7ed? open? varied? often starting and stopping as a resu$t of inti"ate co""unication. / o r "a $ 2 e 7 d e p e n d s o n o n e $ o v e r g e t t i n g t h e o t h e r o f f . T a n t r i c > o v e P $ a % depends on each $overAs ski$$ in taking responsibi$it% for their o(n p$easure. /or"a$ 2e7 doesnAt happen (ithout a shiva $inga" Ban erectionC? the $oss of ( h ic h is a "aj or c a$ a "i t %. T an tr ic >o ve P $ a % us e s "u $ t ip $ e h ar d an d s o ft sti"u$ators on "an% erogenous 5ones a$$ of (hich are capab$e of producing orgas"ic (aves of energ% (ith or (ithout an erection. / or"a$ 2 e7 une7pected$ % reaches heights of pass ion on occas ion due to unkno( n factors . Tantric >ove P $a % can generate a$tered s tates of ecs tatic consciousness a$"ost at (i$$.

<.! 'oving Energ$


,o( do %ou reach such "ind9bogg$ing heights- 2i"p$e? b% generating and channe$ing orgas"ic energ%. The bio$ogica$ forces of se7 certain$% produce $ots of energ% in %our genita$s? especia$$% (hen %ouAre %oung and hea$th%. But (hat happens (hen %ou age or get stressed b% sickness or $ife pressures- Then %ou c a n A t d e p e n d o n h o r " o n e s t o t u r n %o u o n a n d " a k e %o u h i g h . = o u h a v e t o "aster running energ%. Se+ual Breathing Is The !ey 2e7ua$ breathing is the ke% to running orgas"ic energ%. 6e$a7ing? breathing? "oving? "aking s ounds ? and focus ing the "ind are its ess entia$ too$s . ThatA s part$% (h% IAve been inc$uding breathing e7ercises at each stage of the 1$ti"ate E c s t a t i c 2 o $ u t i o n . > i k e a n % n e ( s k i $ $ ? %o u n e e d t o p r a c t i c e r e g u $ a r $ % t o integrate this vita$ "ethod.

157

That re"inds "e of an ear$% session I attended at *argotAs %ear$ong >ove and Ecstas% Training. 2he (as presenting so"e se7ua$ practice in her frank and f$a"bo %an t s t %$ e. +s s he graphica$$ % des cribed ho( to channe$ energ%? a$$ of the as s is tant ins tructors ? s itting cros s 9$egged on either s ide of her? s tarted vibrating ( ith b$is sfu$ e7pres sions on their faces. +$$ she had to do (as focus t h e i r "i n d s o n o r g a s "i c e n e r g % a n d t h e % s t a r t e d s t r e a " i n g t h o s e g r e a t j u i c e s up and do( n their bodies . + t the ti "e? this ( as high$% frus trating to "e. I ( as in the "ids t of ( eeks of practice before having "% firs t ink$ing of ( hat the% cou$d turn on and off at (i$$. But it sure served as a strong "otivator of (hat (as possib$e. .here do %ou channe$ the energ % %o u $earn to generate through se7ua$ breathing- .h%? up %our inner f$ute? "% dear. =ou "a% have an over(he$"ing abundance of energetic juice in %our first chakra? %our se7 center at the base of %o ur s pine. = ou kno( ( hat happens if %o u $et it s i""er and boi$. 6ight? it e7p$odes out the end of vaj ra taking gobs of cu " ( ith it. Ins tead? "ove the en er g % u p t o th e be $$ %? th e s o$ ar p $e 7u s ? t he h ea rt ? t he b ra in ? an d ab ov e. T he n it e7cites? en$ivens? and enriches %our (ho$e bod%. 6e"e"ber "% dear friend? 4oc 2 teven? (ho never chooses e7p$os ive orgas "s ( hi $e h av in g "u $t i p $e in ne r o ne s - .h en I a s k ed hi " ( h % he ne ve r c u"s ? h e s a i d F I j us t $ o v e ( o "e n s o "u c h . . h e n I A " "a k i n g $ o v e ? I s i "p $ % "o v e t h a t juic% orgas"ic energ% up to "% heart. It "akes "e so high engu$fing "e in $ove. I never (ant to ejacu$ate so I can go on "erging (ith 2hakti $ike that forever.F +nd he rea$$% does. Transformative )o/ers * an% ancient te7ts proc$ai" the trans for"at ive po( er of "ov ing orgas "ic energ% even higher? to the throat? brain? third e%e behind the e%ebro(s? and the cro( n of the head. If %ouA r e ai"ing to uti$i5 e Tantra as it ( as origina$$ % envisioned? to raise a(areness? it "akes tota$ sense to (ash the brain (ith this concentrated $ife force. *ore than an%thing? this is (hat generates i"p$osive orgas"s. .hen %our (ho$e bod% is vibrating (ith thes e (aves? %ou enter the sti$$? e"pt%? ti"e$ess void and (ant to sta% there indefinite$%.

158

The too$s %ou kno( ( e$$ b% no( are (hat %ou use to create and pro$ong the e7perience. In addition to se7ua$ breathing? use peaking? p$ateauing? and even interrupting ej acu$ation as needed keep the f$o( going. 3 ive feedback? as k %esOno Euestions? and negotiate different positions as the urge strikes %ou. .atching Deffre and I "aking $ove $ooks nothing $ike an ath$etic porno f$ick encounter. = es ? ( e breathe? "oan? and (rithe dra"a tica $$ %. But IA " ta$king a b o u t t h e c h a n g e s o f r h %t h " " o r e t h a n a n %t h i n g . @ a j r a s t r o k e s a f e ( t i " e s a nd th en ( e s to p? $ et ti ng th e s p as "s ( as h t hr ou gh us . . e t hr us t a f e( t i "es "ore and (e $a% sti$$ for a "o"ent vibrating a$$ over. .e adjus t our position and s Euea$ ( ith de$ight at the ne( found j o%. , ones t$%? ( e never kno( ( hat ( eA $$ (ant to do or ( hatA s going to happen. ItA s jus t different each ti"e and keeps getting better and better.

<.% E4ercise: Creating The /pace 7or Tantric :ove Pla$


On one end of the se7ua$ spectru" is F( ha" ba"? thank %ou "aAa".F On the other end is Tantric >ove P $a%. This Tantric u$ti "a te b$oss o"s ( hen %ou take t h e t i " e a n d c a r e t o c r e a t e t h e r i g h t e n v i r o n " e n t ? "o o d ? a n d p h %s i c a $ s p a c e . .e ca$$ it creating the sacred space to conscious$% accentuate that (eAre bringing the spiritua$ into har"on% (ith the se7ua$. The setting is on$% the first stage of the ,eart9Centered Tantric >ove 6itua$ that (e teach during our private Tantric Initiations. ItAs phases are... aC 2etting: getting ever%thing read% and creating a sacred space. aC ,onoring: recogni5ing the divine in each of us and our desires in the "o"ent. bC Connecting: s$o($% re$a7ing? touching? and har"oni5ing energ%. bC 2 ens ua$ P $a%: opening %o ur s ens es ? breathing together? and "as s aging the (ho$e bod% sensuous$%.

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eC >ove P$a%: "anua$? ora$? and genita$ p$a%. eC C$osing: co"ing do(n s$o($% together? sharing? conc$uding. This e7ercise is about

.eA$$ ta$k about the $ast t(o steps in the ne7t section. doing BaC through BdC. ,ere are the directions...

1C 2 e tt in g: Cr ea te a s ac re d s pa ce to ge th er . C$ ea n th e a re a an d pi ck up b oo ks ? d i r t % c $ o t h e s ? a n d a n % t h i n g e 7 t r a n e o u s . 3 e t % o u r s o u n d s %s t e " a n d " u s i c read%. Co$$ect sacred objects? incense? "assage oi$? condo"s? and $ubricant. 4ecorate the setting (ith f$o(ers? $ighted cand$es? and beautifu$ art. 2C ,onoring: .e$co"e each other (ith a na"astU? bo(ing fro" the ( aist ( ith hands on heart? pa$"s together pointing up. /a"astU "eans the 3 o d O 3 o d d e s s ( i t h i n " e s a $ u t e s t h e 3 o d O 3 o d d e s s ( i t h i n %o u . 4 i s c u s s %o u r des ires ? concerns Bes pecia$ $ % regarding s e7ua$ practic es ( ith a ne( partnerC? and boundaries to decide together ( hat %ou A $$ do. 4o the , o( I .ant To B e >oved e7ercise in the "o"ent if %ou (ant. E7change gifts? (ords of $ove? and gratitude. 1C C onnecting: Take a fe( "o "e nts to $ook deep$ % into each otherA s e %e s . 6itua$$% undress each other? caressing and co"p$i"enting each otherAs bodies. 2hare a ritua$ bath or sho(er? gent$% (ashing the outside (or$d of each other. *erge into a $ong "e$ting hug (ith a$$ parts of %our bodiesA touching (hi$e s%nchroni5ing %our breathing. !C 2ensua$ P$a%: +ssist each other in opening a$$ %our senses. >ight$% "assage e a c h o t h e r A s f a c e a n d h a i r ( h i $ e ( h i s p e r i n g s ( e e t e v e r %t h i n g s . 6 e $ a 7 e a c h other b% s $o( $ % "as s aging %o ur hands and feet ( ith a $itt $e oi$. 4 o s e7ua$ breathing together. >ight$% caress ever%( here on %our partnerAs bod%? visua$i5ing energ% strea"ing fro" %our heart? do(n %our ar"s? into %our hands? and into %our partnerAs bod%. If %ou (ant? "ove right into the 2hangri9>a e7ercise that fo$$o(s. +d"itted$%? ( h a t %o u A v e j u s t e 7 p e r i e n c e d i s a b r i e f s u " " a r % o f ( h a t ( e s p e n d a d a % teaching during our Tantric Initiations. Dust re"e"ber? thereAs no (a% to get it

160

( r o n g . > i s t e n t o %o u r h e a r t ? s h a r e f e e $ i n g s ( i t h %o u r p a r t n e r ? a n d d o ( h a t see"s right in the "o"ent. 6eading and attending (orkshops can add to %our kno($edge of these practices. Or co"e and see us? (eAd $ove to p$a% (ith %ou. .hen ( e donA t have a$$ da %? D effre and I "ight do an abbreviated vers ion of these things (ithin 1) or 1 "inutes. .hen (e rea$$% (ant to go deep and $ong? (e cou$d spend an hour or "ore creating the setting. + s a t%pi ca $ "odern "a$ e? I us ed to res is t the ritua$ as pect of this e7ercis e. Then one da% I rea$i5ed that these preparations "ade "e enter $ove p$a% in a co"p$ete$% different "ood. I needed to $earn to drop this resistance so I cou$d open to running energ%. 2o before dis"iss ing it as us e$es s spiritua$ hoop$a? tr% it ( ith an open "ind and s ee ho( it "akes %ou fee$. +nd face it? gu%s? (o"en $ove this kind of s %rup % s tuff. 6e"e"ber ( hat the Eag$es s aid on their , e$$ ;ree5es Over tour- 3et over itG

<.- E4ercise: /hangri5:a


+s I re"e"ber the stor%? 2hangri9>a (as so"e sort of id%$$ic "ountain va$$e% in the ,i"a$a%as (here ever%thing (as beautifu$ and ever%one (as happ% a$$ the t i "e. E "b ra c e Ta nt ri c >o ve P $a % as pr es en te d he re a nd %o u A $ $ be tr an s p or te d t h e r e . = o u "a % n o t ( a n t t o $ e a v e . / o( t h a t %o u h a v e t h e s k i $ $ s t o "a k e $ o v e for hours? %ou donAt have to $eave. >ike us? %ouA$$ probab$% begin to vie( the necessities of dai$% $ife as interruptions in the rea$ (or$d of se7ua$ co""union. Odd$% enough? so"e ca$$ this e7perience of riding the (ave of ecstas% the @a$$e% Orgas". ItAs not a peak? nor rea$$% a p$ateau. ItAs "ore $ike sinking into an ocean of rapture and $etting the current carr% %o u. * a %b e I "i7 ed "etaphors there? but thereAs no (a% (ords can describe the a$tered state. The 2hangri9>a practice is designed so that %ou can integrate ever%thing %ouAve $earned and rea$i5e the Tantric vis ion together. ItA s about $ong $ove "aking? energ % e7change? and "a7i"u" ecs tas %. Though %ou "a % be s( ept a( a%? e7p$os ive orgas " is nA t the goa$. *u$tip$e inner orgas "s are $ike$ %? but the purpose of this e7ercise is creating as "uch p$easure as %ou can for as $ong as %ou (ant.

161

This e7ercise is best done in the %ab9%u" position? (hich is the Buddhist na"e f o r t h e u n i o n o f "o t h e r a n d f a t h e r . I n %a b 9 %u "? %o u s i t c r o s s 9 $ e g g e d ? us u a $ $ % on pi$$o(s to raise %our hips off the f$oor. =our $over sits on %our $ap (ith her $egs (rapped around %our back. Pi$$o(s under her butt and %our $egs so"eti"es he$p. + $ t e r n a t i v e $ %? %o u r p a r t n e r c a n s E u a t o n t h e %o u r $ a p ( i t h h e r f e e t o n e i t h e r side of %our hips. In this (a% she can support her (eight and gain "ore f r e e d o " o f "o v e "e n t . O r %o u c a n us e a n a r "$ e s s c h a i r . O r b o t h o f %o u c a n $ean back fro" the %a b9 %u " pos ition supporting %ou r ( eight ( ith %ou r ar"s s t r e t c h e d o u t b e h i n d %o u . E 7 p e r i " e n t t o f i n d ( h a t A s c o " f o r t a b $ e e n o u g h t o $ast for a (hi$e. 1C Create the sacred space using the previous e7ercise. 2C +$ternate giving and receiving "anua$ and ora$ genita$ sti"u$ation? "oving into intercourse (hen %ou both canAt (ait an% $onger. !C *ake $ove s$o($% and sensuous$% in various postures unti$ %ouAre both rea$$% turned on. 1C *ove into the %ab9 %u" position or an a$ternate position that a$$o(s %our chakras to a$ign ne7t to each other. If %ou canA t get co"for tab$ e ( ith %ou r partner on %our $ap? tr% spooning or one of %ou $a%ing on top of the other. 2C Begin s$o($% rocking %our hips together? sEuee5ing %our PC pu"ps? and s %n c h r o n i 5 i n g %o u r b r e a t h i n g . @ i s u a $ i 5 e t h e e n e r g % " o v i n g u p %o u r i n n e r f$utes as %ou thrust inside. 'C .hen %ou peak on the edge of orgas "? both s top "oving? re$a7 co"p $et e$ %? b u t k e e p b r e a t h i n g t o g e t h e r . @ i s u a $ i 5 e t h e e n e r g % o f %o u r f i r s t c h a k r a s ? %o u r s e7 centers at the bas es of %o ur s pine? s ( ir$ing bet( een %ou . 1s e %o ur P C to pu"p energ% up(ards together.

162

8C +fter a fe( "inutes? certain$% before %ou $ose %our shiva $inga"? "ove again u n t i $ %o u r e a c h a n o t h e r p e a k j u s t b e f o r e t h e p o i n t o f n o r e t u r n . T h i s t i " e e7change energ% at the second chakra? just be$o( %our nave$s. 8 C 6 e p e a t t h e c %c $ e a t e a c h c h a k r a : t h i r d a t t h e s o $ a r p $ e 7 u s ? f o u r t h a t t h e heart? fifth at the throat? si7th at the third e%e in the forehead? and the seventh at the cro(n of the head. =ou can stroke the front of each otherAs bodies $ight$% to encourage %our partnerAs energ% to "ove up. &C /o( continue "aking $ove (ithout structure? just $etting the surge of energ% unfo$d on its o(n. *aintain e%e contact fro" ti"e to ti"e and use "outh9to9 "outh inverted breathing to heighten %o ur e7perience. That "eans %o u breathe in (hi$e %ou r partner breathes out and vice vers a. 1 s e %ou r P C pu"ps to prope$ the energ% up %our inner f$utes just before e7p$oding. 6ide the (ave t h a t b $ o s s o " s ( i t h i n %o u ( h e r e v e r i t t a k e s %o u b o t h ( i t h o u t c o n s c i o u s direction. 8C C$ose together b% co"ing do(n s$o($%. Dust $a% do(n ent(ined? or spoon? ( h i$ e %o u r b re at hi ng s et t$ es . Ta $k E ui et $ %? s h ar in g ( h at %o u e7 pe ri en c ed . Conc$ude (ith a na"astU. Books have been (ritten about the 2hangri9>a e7perience. ThereAs so "uch variation that "oving? breathing? visua$i5ing? and "aking sounds can bring. /o( %ouAve got the too$s to be a virtuoso. +$$ %ou need is creative practice.

163

Chapter >: 7inal Thoughts


This $ast chapter begins (ith a poignant picture of %our future state of ecstas%. ItA s $ike ( atching %ou r o( n fina$ e7a "? but one in ( hich a$$ %ou need to do is read and enjo%. If %ouAre interested in hands9on Tantric coaching? IAve inc$uded so"e $inks about connecting (ith Tantric 3oddesses. The bu$k of these fina$ thoughts of the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution "ost$% contain reference "ateria$. ThereAs so"e vita$ data here about s"art se7? a bib$iograph% for further reading? a $is t of s o"e of our favorite re$a7ing and s ens ua$ "us ic? and the g$ossar% of ter"s.

>.1 (nother /tor$


%he following is an actual account of a %antric evening 3 O. can en oy on your one7year anniversary of starting the .ltimate /cstatic (olution... =our $overAs invitation to join her for dinner and a (ho$e night of p$a% is e 7 c i t i n g b u t c r %p t i c . , e r i n n u e n d o e s r e a $ $ % t u r n %o u o n ? b u t %o u a r e n A t s u r e (hat to e7pect. + s t( i$ight s ett$ed? %ou enter her beautifu$ $ % decorated Tantric te"p $e. = ou canA t he$p but be titi$$ ated b% the cand$e$ ight? incens e? and s oft "us i c. = ou s h i v e r a t t h e ( a % s h e $ o o k s $ %i n g s e n s u o u s $ % o n p i $ $ o ( s c o v e r i n g t h e f $ o o r . 2 h e A s o n $ % ( e a r i n g a $ i t t $ e d i a p h a n o u s f a b r i c . 2 h e b e c k o n s %o u t o s i t n e 7 t t o her and begins feeding %ou (ith her fingers. .hen a "orse$ Faccidenta$$%F s$ips o n t o h e r e 7 p o s e d s i $ k % s k i n ? s h e g u i d e s %o u ( i t h a $ i t t $ e p o u t t o u s e %o u r "outh to $ick her c$ean. 3igg$ing together? itAs eas % to encourage her to eat off of %our bod%? too. 4onoring The GodAGoddess 'ithin + fter %o u both have enough finger food and de$ightfu $ cha"p agne? s he takes %our hand and guides %ou to the bed. =ou both bo(? touch foreheads? and

164

$ o o k d e e p $ % i n t o e a c h o t h e r A s e %e s . O n e a f t e r a n o t h e r ? s h e ( h i s p e r s a $ $ t h e things she $oves about %our bod%? "ind? and spirit. 2i"i$ar (ords of $ove and affection canAt be restrained fro" gushing out of %ou. 2 h e s $ o ( $ % b e g i n s u n d r e s s i n g %o u ? b r e a t h i n g ? k i s s i n g ? a n d n i b b $ i n g o n e a c h part she so de$icate$% e7poses. On purpose? she brushes a no( throbbing vajra once or t(ice. +s %ou return the favor and adore ever% inch of her bod%? vajra fee$s $ike a rock. Then she $eads %ou into the bath? ( here %ou gent$% (ash and dr% each other a$$ over. +s she spreads her de$ightfu$ for" on the bed again? she hands %ou a bott$e of s ce nt ed "a s s ag e o i$ . + s %o u to uc h a nd ca re s s he r s e ns u a$ $ %? %o u r h an ds fe e$ the heat fro" %o ur t(o hearts "eeting. 2(ooning? %o u (orship ever % "i$$i"eter of her bod% (ith s(eet oi$ s$o($% and tender$%. .hen? after another C4 changes? %ou fina$$% touch %oni? sheAs a$read% dripping (ith de$ight. +s %ou de$icate$% p$a% (ith her s(eet f$o(er (ith %our fingers for the $ongest ti"e? her p $ e a s u r e s t r e a "s u p %o u r a r "s ? "a k i n g %o u f e e $ as i f i t ( a s %o u r %o n i ( a s being $oved. 'hat s That 3uicy Aroma& + $$ at once? %ou rea$i5e %o uA re face do( n and s heA s s tradd$ing %o u. Is that d e $ i c i o u s f r a g r a n c e c o a t i n g %o u r b a c k t h e s a "e o i $ %o u u s e d ? o r i s i t h e r ( e t %oni $ips- =ou drop the thought and sink into the juic% "assage. ,er soft s$o( touch "agnifies the subt$e vibrations %ouA re fee$ing ins ide into po( erfu$ (aves of ecstatic spas"s. 2 udden$ %? she ro$$s %o u over and her "outh encirc$es vaj ra. >ike a tida$ ( ave in an a$read% stor"% sea? a huge surge of energ% s(eeps up %our bod% shaking ever% ce$$ (ith e$ectric jo%. +s she sucks? pu$se after pu$se of pure b$iss pu"ps through %ou and out the top of %our head. On and on she $icks and kisses vajra? rocking %ou inside (ith $iEuid fire(orks. ;$oating on so"e other p$ane of e7is tence? %ou r "ind e"pt ies ? %ou r bod% e7pands to fi$$ the (ho$e roo"? and %our spirit soars in rapture.

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+s a $itt$e part of %ou co"es back to earth? rea$i5ing %our be$oved is sitting on %ou (ith vajra co"p$ete$% engu$fed b% %oni? s$o($% ro$$ing her hips back and forth. + s e$ectric fire f$oods %ou ins ide and out? a$$ %o u can do to contain s o "uch energ% is re$a7 co"p$ete$% and breathe. 2udden$%? %ouAre f$oating on that c$oud again? but this ti"e together? (rithing s$o( $% $ike snakes intert(ined around each other. Another )lace And Time 2o"e keen other9(or$d$% sense of sight inside %ou (atches as each stroke of vaj ra prope$s bo$ts of $ightning through %ou r "erged bodies ? not t( o but one h u g e e r o g e n o u s 5 o n e . + f t e r e a c h s u b t $ e " o v e " e n t ? %o u f $ o a t t o g e t h e r f o r "inu tes shaking ( ith ecs tas % s trea "ing out of ever % pore. , igher and higher t he v a$ $e %s of p$ ea s u re r is e as %o u p u$ s e ov er a nd ov er a nd th en s ur re nd er t o the tide of rapture. =ou both $ose a$$ sense of ti"e? a$$ sense of ph%sica$ boundaries? a$$ sense of s eparation fro" each other and ever%th ing around %ou . =ou are one? unified (ith the universe. 4o %ou need or (ant an %thing- /o? %o uAre co"p $ete. . h a t A s n e 7 t - / o t h i n g ? j u s t s t a % h e r e . . h e r e i s t h a t d r e a " $ i f e %o u u s e d t o $ive- ;ar (a%. +nd then the sun rises.

>.2 )ands5On Coaching


In spite of the gro(ing interest in Tantra? this fantas% of sacred $ove"aking and inti"ate co""union is rather foreign to "odern peop$e. =ou can $earn "uch fro" reading? but as %ou no( kno(? the EJPE6IE/CE of Tantra is rea$$% (here itAs at. ;or this reason? "an% students ne( to spiritua$ se7ua$it% attend (orkshops and (ork private$% (ith coaches. * ntr &t * hoe Tantra +t Tahoe? thatAs Deffre and "e? specia$i5e in a series of private t(o9da% Tantric Initiations (hich catapu$t %ou into this a$tered state Euick$%. B%

166

f o c u s i n g o n t h e n e e d s o f o n e o r t ( o p e o p $ e a t a t i "e ? ( e c a n t e a c h p r a c t i c e s and ritua$s that are perfect for unb$ocking %our energ% channe$s and recharging %ou r re$ations hips . *an % arenA t inc$uded in this book. If Tantra is t h e f a s t t r a c k t o e n $ i g h t e n "e n t ? o u r i n i t i a t i o n s a r e t h e c u s t o " i 5 e d s u p e r f as t track to great $ove"aking. I f %o u ( a nt t o g o d ee pe r f as te r in to s ac re d s e 7u a$ it %? ( eA d $ ov e f or %o u t o contact us via e"ai$ at "ai$to:2o"rajMTantra+tTahoe.co". Or visit our (ebsite http:OO(((.tantraattahoe.co" (hich describes a$$ of this in greater detai$. B% the (a%? (e a$so conduct Tantra (orkshops organi5ed b% other groups. If %ou have a circ$e of c$ose friends? (eAd be happ% to arrange so"ething for %our s"a$$ group as (e$$. * ntric +o''esses +s IAve to$d "% stor% and guided %our practice? IAve introduced %ou to severa$ Tantric 3oddesses (ho I trust? $ove? and adore. The% (ork professiona$$% (ith aspiring Tantrikas $ike %ou? teaching the ski$$s of the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution. If %ouAre interested in e7p$oring hands9on coaching fro" a Tantric 3oddess? p$ease contact "e via e"ai$ (ith %our ti"e fra"e and $ocation at " ai$to: 2o"rajMTantra+tTah oe.co" .

>.! /"art /e4


Tantra sa%s F%esF to (hatever %ou desire (ith consciousness. .e "a% advocate o pe n s e 7u a$ it % i n a n % f or " %o u c ho os e? b ut no t in an un co ns c io us or u ns a fe "anner. 2erious 2T4s Bse7ua$$% trans"itted diseasesC such as ,I@ Bthe +I42 virusC and hepatitis are be$ieved to be trans"itted through f$uid e7change. To s ta% hea$th % and free fro" 2T4 s? (e a$$ need to be carefu$ and conscious ( ith a$$ se7ua$ contact. . e s t r o n g $ % u r g e a $ $ s e 7 u a $ p $ a %e r s a n d p a r t n e r s t o f o $ $ o ( t h e s " a r t s e 7 practices inc$uded here. .eA ve adapted the co$or9coded chart? F+ 2pectru" Of The 6isks ;or ,I@ Trans"ission?F and guide$ines fro" (hat (e $earned

167

t hr ou gh th e , u "a n + ( ar en es s In s t it ut e. , + I ta ug ht u s to p $a % i n t he gr ee n 5one and never in the red or pink 5ones. .e suggest the %e$$o( 5one is up to individua$ discretion based on trust and confidence. .e use the fo$$o(ing conversation agenda to be responsib$e for our o(n p$easure and decide (hat $eve$ of risk (eAre co"fortab$e (ith during each encounter... I, -esires: -isc#ss .h t /o# . nt to 'o, II, B c0gro#n': 1 ve 2r n03 responsi$%e pre-sex convers tion: 1, Brie2 re%ev nt histor/ o2 sex# % pr ctices 2, 4#rrent sex# % pr ctices
aC high risk bC protection cC "u$tip$e partners

3, 4o)p%ete histor/ o2 S*-s


aC ,I@ and +I42 bC herpes and genita$ (arts cC ch$a"%dia? s%phi$is? and gonorrhea

4, Most recent S*- test res#%ts 5, S0in3 )o#th3 n' genit % con'ition, III, Bo#n' ries: Est $%ish n' gree on pr ctices n' %i)its, A S,ectrum Of The (is#s 1or 4IV Transmission 0reen 2i"u$taneous para$$e$ 2E>;9P>E+216I/3 ;6OTT+3E Bbod% to bod% rubbingC 2OCI+> Bdr%C <I22I/3 ;6E/C, B(etC <I22I/3 P,O/E or CO*P1TE6 2e7 @O=E16I2* or EJ,IBITIO/I2* ,OT T1BBI/3 ,133I/3 or *+22+3I/3

168

9ello& 2haring 2EJ TO=2 Bvibrators? di$dos? etc.C 6I**I/3 Busing the tongue in the anusC O6+> 2EJ (ith a "an not ED+C1>+TI/3 O6+> 2EJ (ith a (o"an not *E/2T61+TI/3 16I/E in the "outh *utua$ E6OTIC *+22+3E (ith hands ;I/3E6I/3 or ;I2TI/3 in the vagina or anus @+3I/+> or +/+> I/TE6CO162E (ith protection Pink O6+> 2EJ (ith a "an or (o"an ED+C1>+TI/3 in the "outh O6+> 2EJ (ith a (o"an *E/2T61+TI/3 @+3I/+> I/TE6CO162E (ithout protection 3ed +/+> I/TE6CO162E (ithout a condo" 2haring /EE4>E2 (ithout steri$i5ation B>OO49to9B>OO4 or 2E*E/9to9B>OO4 contact

>.% Bibliograph$
The Art Of Se+ual Ecstasy* The )ath Of Sacred Se+uality 1or 'es tern 6overs by Margo An an d @ 3erem y )B Tarch er@ 6os An geles @ C<D< .hat can I sa%? this is our teacherAs book that started us on the ecstatic Tantric path. ItAs the "ost co"prehensive practica$ s%ste" rep$ete (ith e7ercis es and practices that %ou A $$ ( ant to pour over and do again and again. T h e A rt Of S e+u al Magic* C u ltivatin g S e+u al En ergy To Trans form "our 6ife by Margo Anand@ 3eremy )B Tarcher@ 6os Angeles@ C<<E +n advanced course in erotic enchant"ent and the "agic of e7tended o rg as " ( h ic h t ak es th e p o( er o f s e 7u a$ it % be %o n d "e r e $ ov e"a k in g b %

169

sho( ing readers ho( to generate intens e se7ua$ energ% and use it as fue$ for rea$i5ing persona$ and spiritua$ goa$s. 7ivine Se+* The Tantric 0 Taoist Arts Of Conscious 6oving by Caroline Aldred@ 4ar,erSan1rancisco@ C<<; + short beautifu$ g$oss% i$$ustrated paperback (hich su""ari5es the sacred approach to $ove"aking. ESO* 4o/ "ou And "our 6over Can Give Each Other 4ours Of E +t e n d e d S e +u a l O r g a s m b y A l an ) B B r a u e r @ M B 7 B @ a n d 7 o n n a 3 B Brauer@ 'arner Boo#s@ 2e/ "or#@ C<DF This is a short ground9breaking book (ith a (orkab$e "ethod to separate ejacu$ation fro" orgas" and e7tend $ove p$a% (hich rea$$% "akes c$ear ho( "uch se7ua$ potentia$ the average $over never activates. T ho ug h s o "e ( h a t c $i ni ca $ an d no n9 s p ir it ua $ a s %o uA d e 7p ec t fr o" a ph%s ician? it gives ph%s ica$ e7ercis es to "ake both "en and (o"enA s orgas"s reach inconceivab$e ne( heights and go on forever. 4o/ To Ma# e 6ove A ll 2 igh t =an d 7rive A 'om an 'ild >* Male Multi,le Orgasm And Other Secrets 1or )rolonged 6ovema#ing by Barbara !eesling@ )hB7B@ 4ar,er)errenial@ 2e/ "or#@ C<<G + s hort prag"a tic paperback b% a fe"a $e ps %cho $ogis t ( ho e7p$ains e7act$% ho( she teaches c$ients to do (hat her tit$e pro"ises. The 6ove !eys* The Art Of Ecstatic Se+ by 7iana (ichardson@ 4ar,er Collins 8 .!@ C<<< This "a % be "% favorite Tantric book of a$$ ti"e. ItA s a perfect b$end of t he T an tr ic ( ea vi ng o f h ea rt ? s p ir it ? $ us t? r it ua $. an d pr ac ti ca $ i t %. 4 i an a is Euite opinionated about "an% uniEue practices (hich a$$ bear e7peri"entation. T h e 2 e/ M a l e S e + u a l i t y * T h e T r u t h A b o u t M e n @ S e +@ A n d ) l e a s u r e by Bernie Hilbergeld@ )hB7B@ Bantam Boo#s@ 2e/ "or#@ C<<%

170

This is the top scientific book b% one of the $eading se7 therapists about "a$e se7ua$it% co"p$ete (ith frank discussion of a$$ benefits and prob$e"s? inc$uding "an% practica$ e7ercises. The One 4our Orgasm* The .ltimate Guide To Totally Satisfying A ny Man Or 'om an Every Tim eI by 7rB Bob S ch/ art:@ )h B7 B an d 6eah Sch/art:@ Brea#through )ublishing@ 4ouston@ C<<E This book contains great e7ercises to de$iver on its f$agrant pro"ise. ItAs based on 2 %ears of research b% *ore 1niversit% (hich teaches sensua$it% and erotic practice? focused pri"ari$% on ho( to satisf% (o"en. S a c r e d S e +* E c s t a t i c T e c h n i 9 u e s f o r E m , o/ e r in g ( e l a t i o n s h i , s b y 3/ ala =!ath leen Bin gh am >@ In n er 3u ice )rod u ction s @ S an 1ran cis co@ C<<F + beautifu$ $itt$e book that teaches a ! hour Tantric ritua$ inc$uding "an% uniEue and po(erfu$ e7ercises for individua$ preparation and coup$e bonding. Se+ual Energy Ecstasy* A )ractical Guide To 6ovema#ing Secrets Of T h e E as t A n d ' es t b y 7 a v i d a n d E l l e n ( a m s d a l e @ B an t a m B o o # s @ 2e/ "or#@ C<DE The "ost practica$ and techniEue fi$$ed book about creating and "a7 i"i5 ing the ecs tatic res pons e during $ove"aking. @ er % s piritua$ and? as %ou "ight e7pect fro" the tit$e? focused on "a7i"i5ing se7ua$ energ%. S e+u al S ecrets * Th e A lch em y of Ecs tas y b y 2 i# 7 ou glas an d )en ny Slinger@ 7estiny Boo#s@ (ochester@ Vermont@ C<J< This is an a"a5ing co"pi$ation of practices and ritua$s fro" ancient te7ts in $anguage and graphics usefu$ to the "odern Tantrika. /ik and Penn% have done a great service to the "odern (or$d b% giving us access to these hidden secrets. S,iritual Se+* Secrets Of Tantra 1rom The Ice Age To The 2e/ Millennium by 2i# 7ouglas@ )oc#et Boo#s@ 2e/ "or#@ C<<J

171

+ thorough revie( of the histor% of Tantra and sacred se7ua$it% inc$uding a concise su""ar% of "odern Tantric practice. Se+ual Solutions* A Guide 1or Men And The 'omen 'ho 6ove Them by Michael Castleman@ Touchstone@ 2e/ "or#@ C<DK This is a do(n9to9earth? no nonsense revie( of "a$e se7ua$ prob$e"s and techniEues to i"prove $ove"ak ing. + $itt$e dr% and devoid of spirit for "e? but (orth(hi$e for its he$pfu$ e7ercises. Tantra* The Art Of Conscious 6oving by Charles 0 Caroline Muir@ Mercury 4ouse@ San 1rancisco@ C<D< + ( onderfu$ $itt$e book (hich pres ents the *uirsA approach to teaching Tantra? (eaving =oga? re$ationship? and se7ua$ hea$ing into erotic practice. Taoist Secrets Of 6ove* Cultivating Male Se+ual Energy by Manta# Chia and Michael 'inn@ Aurora )ress@ Santa 1e@ 2e/ Me+ico@ C<DG This is an e7ce$$ent presentation of the Taoist approach to "a$e se7ua$it% ( h ic h p res cr ib es a nd i s a pp ar en t$ % s uc ce s s fu $ in a ch ie vi ng co "p$ e t e se"ina$ retention for "en. It has so"e po(erfu$ e7ercises? but is too strict and preach% for Tantrikas $ike "e. The Three8'ee# )rogram Ending )remature E$aculation* Man s Guide To Self8Im,rovement To 4el, Im,rove Sensual A/ areness by 'illiam 6B 2a#osan@ Minimum 'B )ublishers@ 2e/ "or#@ C<<G This is an Eng$is h trans $ation of FThe 2 i"p $e 2 o$utionF? a s hort $itt $e paperback bas ica$$ % pres enting a frank dis cus s ion of the s ituation and e7ercises to practice co"ing c$ose and backing off. The "in8"ang Butterfly* Ancient Chinese Se+ual Secrets 1or 'estern 6overs by Valentin Chin@ 3eremy )B TarcherA )utnam@ 2e/ "or#@ C<<G

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+ decided$% Taoist version of ancient se7ua$ secrets (hich is "ore regi"ented than "uch Tantric practice? but containing so"e va$uab$e too$s and ritua$s.

>.- 'usic 3eco""endations


Tantric )ractice Music El84adra* the Mysti# 7ance by !laus 'iese@ Ted de 3ong@ Mathia Gras so/ The rh%th " of 2 ufi trance "edit ation. O ne of our ke% practic e C4 s that ( e us e t o t e a c h s e 7 u a $ b r e a t h i n g a n d "o v i n g e n e r g % u p %o u r c h a k r a s . This rh%th"ic "oving background piece (as specia$$% produced for our teacher? *argot +nand. Dust $istening to it "akes us strea" se7ua$ energ%. 7or$e 6ing by 7avid )arsons + s$o(? rh%th"ic? "oving? trance% "i7 (hich sa"p$es traditiona$ Tibetan "usic (ith a gent$% evo$ving e$ectronic co"position. The first 1'9"inute track is ca$$ed FTantra.F )assion by )eter Gabriel O ve r 2 ) s ho rt tr ac ks ( i th "o s t $ % s ub t$ e rh %t h "s ? co "p os ed as t he s c or e for the F>ast Te"ptation of Christ.F Often "e$odic and sensuous? so"eti"es Euiet? so"eti"es raucous (ith a *idd$e Eastern f$air. 7ee, 1orest@ Bohem e@ and Com,arsa by 7ee, 1orest I donAt kno( if these gu%s rea$$% are +frican or are .estern ne( age "usicians p$a%ing earth% sounds. 6egard$es s? the pri"a$ nature of 4eep ;ores tA s "usic is great for dancing? "oving the hips ? and getting s e7ua$ energ% f$o(ing. Totem and Bones by Gabrielle (oth and the Mirrors

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Deffre $oves dru"s and pri"itive rh%th"s so 3abrie$$eAs si"p$e beat turns her on "ore than "os t (ho si"p$% find the" trance%. (ela+ing Meditative Music SA2 by 7euter T h e c o n s u "" a t e n e ( a g e "u s i c i a n ( h o A s r e s p o ns i b $ e f o r t h e d %n a "i c "usic on "an% of our "editation C4s uses his gent$e touch for this series of soft subt$e re$a7ing the"es. Tantric 4eart* Music 1or 6overs by Shastro T(o $ong s$o( sensua$ tracks inspired b% Indian the"es (hich is energi5ing and re$a7ing. 4igher Ground and Sensual )leasure ,lus others by Steven 4al,ern Evocative? sustained chords f$oat? sus pended in ti"e? a"p$% "editative and re$a7ing. Tantra 7rums by Al Gromer !han *%stica$? f$o(ing? sensua$? erotic? engaging... $ove$% "usica$ support for s$o(? ecstatic $ove"aking. Transports the $istener to another $eve$ of consciousness. Music To 7isa,,ear In C 0 % by (a,hael <e% e$e"ents in the trance% section of our "usic co$$ection? bound to $u$$ an%one into a ti"e$ess space. Sensual 6ovema#ing Music E(A by E(A

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The eerie chanting and voca$s of E6+ are hip and upbeat creating an erotic "ood. Erotic Moods by 2usound + rh%th"ic sensua$ ro"antic "usica$ journe% punctuated b% $ush e$ectronic sounds. Mythos by Mythos This upbeat group centered piano and guitar but (ith "an% other instru"ents in p$aces is our $atest favorite? featuring a ti"e$ess fee$ing of "%sticis" through +frican? *idd$e Eastern? and Orienta$ tones. !arma@ )oem @ and Sem antic S,aces by 7elerium *a%be because (e both $ove rock and ro$$ so "uch? 4e$eriu" has $ong been one of our top artists for $ove"aking. Their three $atest C4s put us into an a$tered space (ith e$ectronic sound? h%pnotic rh%th"? and sensua$ the"es. FPoe"F has "ore strong voca$s than the ear$ier t(o (hich pu$se right into our subconscious energ% centers. Sensual Sensual and Suave Suave by B8Tribe T(o of our favorite erotic C4s have so"e 2panish voca$i5ing over rock9 t %p e f $ a " e n c o " u s i c . 2 i n c e ( e d o n A t s p e a k t h e $ a n g u a g e ? i t t r a n s p o r t s us to a ro"antic space (ithout thinking. Enigma@ The Cross Of Changes@ 6e (oi Est Mort@ and The Screen Behind The Mirror by Enigma + n% ne( co$$ection of s ens ua$ "us ic has to inc$ude Enig"aA s four great C 4 s . T h e %A r e a $ i t t $ e v e r b a $ a n d c h a n g e a b $ e s o t h e % d o n A t h a v e t h e trance9$ike effect (e prefer? but the rich the"es and instru"entation "ake the" a jo% to $isten to.

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>.6 0lossar$ Of Ter"s


+n% ne( fie$d that changes hu"an perception and behavior evo$ves itA s o(n $ingo. The sa$ient advantage of coining ne( (ords is our abi$it% to "ore precise$% focus on etherea$ Eua$ities that are difficu$t to describe (ith co""on Eng$ish. This g$ossar% can he$p %ou adjust to the ne( $anguage. ?.? T h e p o i n t o f n o r e t u r n "e a s u r e d o n t h e 1 ) 9 p o i n t s c a $ e o f s e 7 u a $ a r o u s a $ at (hich ejacu$ator% orgas" is inevitab$e. 1@5Point /cale + n a rb it ra r % ( a % of "on i to ri ng $e ve $ o f s e7 ua $ ar ous a$ d ur in g pr ac ti c e and se7 p$a% fro" 1? no arousa$? to 1)? orgas". Big O + strong e7p$osive orgas". Channel Energ$ To circu$ate? "ove? or run se7ua$ energ% around the bod%. 2ee energ%. Chakra O ne of s even centers or vortices ins ide the bod % fro" the botto" of the spine to the top of the head (here subt$e energ% is generated? co$$ected? stored? and s(ir$ed. Though energ% is energ%? it has different Eua$ities at each chakra. 2ee Energ%. Chi 2ee Energ%. Clio *argotAs preferred na"e for c$itoris. 2ee C$itoris. Clitoris + se7ua$ organ above the vagina (hich can give a (o"an se7ua$ p$easure (hen it is touched. 2ee C$io.

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Coitus 3eservatus or Coitus Interruptus The ( ithdra( a$ techniEue dating fro" ancient 6o"e in (hich the "an pu$$s his penis out before ejacu$ating. Cornerstones ;our si"p$e but po(erfu$ ph%sica$ ski$$s used to generate ecstas% at (i$$ 9 presence Bre$a7ation? "enta$ focus? and concentrationC? breath? sound? and "ove"ent. Corona or Cro&n The ridge at the base of the head of the penis. +$so kno(n as the cro(n. Cu" To pus h out sper". 2 ee Ej acu$ate. Cu"ing E7p$osive orgas" acco"panied b% ejacu$ation. 1esensiti2ing 1sing products or doing things to te"porari$% desensiti5e the penis during se7ua$ sti"u$ation. 1eva"ani Ba$$s? scrotu"? and testic$es? adapted fro" the 2anskrit for divine ge"s? je(e$s? or pear$s. 1r$ Orgas" + $ong series of s$o( p$easurab$e spas"s that "en can e7perience ( it ho ut e j a cu $a ti ng . .i th a r us h o f o rg as "i c en er g %? th e e "i s s io n ph as e of orgas" can be avoided (hi$e sti$$ enjo%ing the (onderfu$ ecstas% of the e7pu$sion spas"s. 2ee I"p$osive Orgas"s E aculate T o p us h o ut s pe r". 2 ee Cu ".

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E"ission Phase The first stage of ejacu$ator% orgas" (hen the "a$e prostate g$and a u t o "a t i c a $ $ % c o n t r a c t s a n d e "p t i e s p r o s t a t i c f $ u i d ? a "a j o r c o " p o n e n t of se"en? into the urethra. Energ$ The nervous s ti"u$a tion and ph%s i ca$ e7citation that our bodies fee$ a$$ the ti"e (hich is responsib$e for e"otiona$ sensations and the ph%sica$ "anifestation of spirit. *ost strong$% fe$t b% "ost as a resu$t of se7ua$ sti"u$ation and orgas". In China itAs ca$$ed chi, in India itAs ca$$ed prana, and in Dapan itAs ca$$ed )i. Energ$ Orgas" 2ee I"p$osive Orgas". E4plosive Orgas" The kind of sudden strong orgas" that re$ieves tension and re$eases energ% Euick$% in a fe(9second f$ash of p$easure (hich is acco"panied b% ejacu$ation in "en and often drains $overs of their vita$ essence. E4pulsion Phase Once those $itt$e s(i""ers are e"itted into %our channe$? the rh%th"ic ( av e$ ik e s of t9 "u s c $ e co nt ra ct io ns p ro pe $ th e s e "e n do( n %o u r u re th ra and out the head of %our penis (here the% have a brief fight for surviva$ a n d u s u a $ $ % $ o s e . T h e s e c o n t r a c t i o n s o f %o u r p e $ v i c "u s c $ e s t h a t c a u s e the actua$ re$ease of se"en a$so are the "ain ones that cause the fantastic p$easure. 7eedback /and&ich or 7eedback C$cle + dip$o "a tic ( a % $overs can as k for changes in s e7ua$ p$a % or other behavior ( ithout hurting their partnerA s fee$ings . The feedback s and( ich is a co""unication c%c$e? beginning and ending (ith positive reinforce"ent? (hich begins (ith a co"p$i"ent? asks for so"ething different? and fina$$% ackno($edges (hatAs (orking.

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7ren ul u" The ring of indentation just behind the corona or head of the penis? especia$$% on the underside? (hich is high$% sensitive. 7ull Bod$ Orgas" +n energetic i"p$osive orgas" through the entire bod% acco"panied b% (rithing? undu$ating? and vibrating a$$ over as a resu$t of channe$ing se7ua$ energ% out of the genita$s. 2ee I"p$osive Orgas". 0lans The rounded tip of the c$itoris or penis. 05/pot + s"a$$ p$easure point $ocated a fe( inches deep on the upper part of the vagina$ channe$? reported first in the 1: )s b% a g%neco$ogist? 4r. Ernest 3rafenberg? as the fe"a$e orgas"ic trigger. 6ecent research b% 4r. 3ar% 2chubach indicates that there actua$$% is a 39area a$ong "uch of the roof of the vagina a$ong the sponge surrounding the urethra. 0uru + spiritua$ teacher or "aster? traditiona$$% fro" India. )and Aob *anua$$% p$easuring a vajra b% onese$f or b% a $over. )ead The g$ans? corona? or cro(n of the penis. )I= The +I42 or auto9i""une deficienc% virus I"plosive Orgas" Inner orgas" or energ% orgas". + $ong series of s$o( p$easurab$e vibrations in both "en and (o"en acco"panied (ith a rush of orgas"ic energ% (hich occurs (hen the se7ua$ arousa$ gets pu"ped back inside

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and is circu$ate over and over again ( ithout e7p$os ive re$eas e. 2 ee 4 r% Orgas". I"sak +n +rabic (ord $itera$$% "eaning FretentionF referring to retaining se"en ( ithin the bod% ( hi$e "ak ing $ove. I"s ak ( as deve$oped for "en (ho needed to s atis f% an entire hare" each night and cou$dnA t keep getting it up again and again after cu"ing (ith each $over. Inner 7lute T he in vi s i b$ e c ha nn e$ n ea r t he s pi ne th at c on ne ct s th e c ha kr as i"a gi n ed to $ook $ike a ho$$o( ba"boo. 2ee Chakras. 8are22a + s t i$ $ $o ve "a ki ng te ch ni Eu e p ub $i s h ed b % + $i ce B un ke r 2 to ck ha "? a p i o n e e r i n g f e " a $ e p h %s i c i a n ? i n 1 & & ! d u r i n g ( h i c h t h e p e n i s r e " a i n s inside the vagina for an hour or "ore si"p$% fee$ing the de$ightfu$ energ%. 8egels E7ercises origina$$% deve$oped b% a g%neco$ogist na"ed 4r. +rno$d <ege$ in 1: 2 to teach (o"en to regain contro$ of their urinar% ref$e7es b% restoring tone of their PC "usc$es after the trau"a of chi$dbirth. 2ee PC *usc$e. 8i 2ee Energ%. :inga" The ,indu na"e for penis. 2ee @ajra. :otus Position 2itting (ith $egs crossed over one another. 'editation

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2 itting and e"pt %in g the "ind b% reciting "an tras ? ( atching the breath? or ( itnes s ing ideas f$oating b %? intended to create a Fno "indF condition of deep inner peace fi$$ed (ith sti$$ness. 'ove Energ$ To circu$ate? channe$? or run se7ua$ energ% around the bod%. Energ%. 2ee

,a"astB Bo(ing fro" the (aist (ith hands on heart? pa$"s together pointing up? "e aning Fthe 3 odG 3oddes s ( ithin "e s a$utes the 3 odG 3 oddess ( ithin %ou.F ,o 'ind +n e"pt% "ind. + "editative state of deep inner peace fi$$ed (ith sti$$ness. Orgas" 2e7ua$ c$i"a7? the "o"ent of "ost intense p$easure in se7ua$ s ti "u $ a t io n? us ua $$ % a cc o "p a ni e d ( i th e 7p $o s i ve r e$ ea s e ? a nd s o "e t i "e s b % an un$i"ited? ti"e$ess? (ho$e bod %9 "ind9 spirit a$tered state. 2ee Cu " in g. Orgas"ic Energ$ 2ee Energ%. Orgas" 'aster 2 o"eone ( ho can choos e the t%pe ? ti "ing? and nu"ber of orgas "s that occur. PC 'uscle 2hort for pubococc%geus. The "usc$e that snakes do(n around the anus and genita$s connecting the pubic to the cocc%7 bones p$us the sitting bones and $egs. Peak >etting se7ua$ e7cite"ent rise to a high $eve$ and then i""ediate$% drop
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back do(n? (hich? if graphed? $ooks $ike sca$ing a s teep "ountain peak and then fa$$ing precipitous$%. Peaking +djusting the se7ua$ sti"u$i that cause sudden surges of arousa$ in order to co"e back do(n (ithout going over the top to orgas". Perineu" The genera$ region of the pe$vic f$oor bet( een the genita$s and ros etta BanusC. Perfor"ance (n4iet$ The (orr% of a $over (hoAs tr%ing to achieve a goa$ $ike orgas"? co"peting ( it h in te rn a$ "en t a $ s t an da rd s ? an d co nt in uo us $ % ( on de ri ng F a" I do in g it right-F PI= Penis in vagina. Plateau + n ongoing high $eve$ of se7ua$ arousa$ that continues (ithout di"inishing. P,= Penis near vagina. Point Of ,o 3eturn The point of no return during s e7ua$ arous a$ at (hich ej acu$ator % orgas " is inevitab$e. 2ee :.:. Pol$a"or$ + open $ifest%$e (hich inc$udes "u$tip$e $overs. Prana 2ee Energ%.

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Prostate + fir"? part$% "uscu$ar? chestnut9si5ed g$and (hich is a $ong9finger 9 (idth inside the rectu" of "a$es at the neck of the urethra. It produces prostatic f$uid? a viscous secretion that is a pri"ar% co"ponent of se"en. Prostate Point + soft spot bet(een the deva"ani Btestic$esC and rosetta BanusC? be$o( the base of vajra? through (hich pressure can be app$ied to the prostate. Prostatitis +n inf$a"ed or en$arged prostate. 3('PE3 The best "ethod of teaching the 1$ti"ate Ecstatic 2o$ution To Pre"ature Ejacu$ation (hich stands for 6e$a7? +(areness? *easure? Pace? Energ% circu$ation? and 6ide the (ave. 3efractor$ Period The ti"e it takes to be ab$e to recover the abi$it% to get and "aintain an erection after ejacu$ating. 3etention Conserving or retaining se"en (ithout ejacu$ating during se7. 3osetta +nus? assho$e. 3un Energ$ To circu$ate? channe$? or "ove se7ua$ energ% around the bod%. 2ee Energ%. /acred /pot 2ee 392pot.

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/.E.C. 2 ubt$e Energ% eJchange. +n% touching? "oving? "editating? or erotic s h ar in g i nc $u di ng fa nt as % th at s t i"u $a t e s a nd co nn ec ts $o ve rs A i nn er vibrations. /crotu" The e7terna$ pouch that contains the testic$es. /elf5Pleasuring + Tantric ter" for "asturbation during (hich one honors oneAs bod% and ce$ebrates p$easure. /e"en 2eed? se"ina$ f$uid? or ejacu$ate. The thick (hite f$uid containing sper"ato5oa that is ejacu$ated b% the "a$e genita$ tract. /e4ual Energ$ 2ee Energ%. / hakti The goddess? 2hivaAs consort? that represents the fe"inine princip$e e"bod%ing pure creative energ% in Tantra. /hiva T h e g o d 2 h i v a ? o n e o f t h e t h r e e p r i "a r % , i n d u d e i t i e s ? k n o ( n i n T a n t r a as the pure e"bodi"ent of "ascu$ine force and cos"ic consciousness. /hiva :inga" +n erect penis. Tantric tradition vie(s the a$$ po(erfu$ 3od 2hiva (ith a continuous erection. /ignals .ords? sounds? or hand "otions used to give feedback to a se7ua$ partner about erotic reactions and arousa$ $eve$. /per"

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2per"ato5oa? the "a$e reproductive ce$$s. /T1 2e7ua$$% trans"itted disease. /trea"ing To circu$ate? "ove? run? or channe$ s e7ua$ energ% often ( ithout s e7ua$ s ti"u$ation (hich creates s trong p$easurab$e spas "s and vibrations . Taking Touch + Tantric "assage techniEue (here the touching hand fee$s as "uch as the bod% part thatAs being caressed? usua$$% acco"p$ished b% the "as s eur e7changing energ% through the heart? ar"s ? hands ? and fingers (ith the receiver. Tantra The ancient spiritua$ science of sacred se7. Tantras +ncient secret (ritings about Tantra. Tantri kas Practitioners adept at Tantra. .rethra The tube or cana$ through (hich urine is discharged in both "en and (o"en and (hich serves as the "a$e genita$ duct that carries se"en through the genita$ s%ste" and out the head of the penis. .rge To Cu" .hen (e get turned on? that so"ething inside that takes over and convinces us to just $et go. =a ra The penis or "a$e se7ua$ organ. 2ee >inga".

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=alle$ Orgas" + co nt in uo us s t at e of or ga s "i c ec s t as % in ( h ic h th e ar ou s a $ cu rv e s t a %s f$at $ike a "esa and doesnAt ju"p up sudden$% as in peaking. 2ee P$ateau. =ipassana 'editation + sensor% "editation designed to open "u$tip$e senses at once. =I9 @ajra In =oni =,9 @ajra /ear =oni 9ab59u " The para"ount Tantric se7ua$ position na"ed for the Buddhist ter" Funion of "other and fatherF in (hich the "an sits cross9$egged (ith the (o"an on his $ap (ith her $egs (rapped around hi". 9esD,o #uestions O n e 9 ( o r d E u e s t i o n s t h a t c a n b e a n s ( e r e d ( i t h a s i " p $ e F %e s F o r F n o F that a$$o( $overs to give feedback (ithout thinking "uch. 9ang 2trong "a$e energ%. 9in 6eceptive fe"a$e energ%. 9oni The traditiona$ ,indu (ord for vagina. Eafu + s o$id? round D apanes e "ed itat ion pi$$o( ? f$attened top and botto " $ike a thick pancake.

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