Still June 27

What is the definition of a family? I think it depends on the one answering the question. I certainly had a strange one. Vampires, wolves and humans, and I were the biggest freak of them all. I talked to my parents, and the rest of my vampire family, and told them that I needed to go with my wolf family to learn all about the wolf way of living. Bella and Edward agreed with me. They also thought that I should learn as much as I could. I told the rest of them that I would tell them everything when I came back. Jake and I walked outside again to meet with the wolves. We agreed on running to La Push, as it was the wolves’ territory. As we phased, I started to think. From now on, everyone would be able to hear everything I was thinking. I registered that I could hear the thoughts of all the wolves. Not just Jakes pack, but Sam’s as well. That was really strange, because no one else could. The pack leaders could hear each other’s thoughts if they wanted to communicate, but Sam couldn’t hear Jake’s pack, and Jake couldn’t hear Sam’s pack. Well that problem was solved now that everyone could hear my thoughts... Suddenly I heard Jake thinking of me. He wondered why he couldn’t hear my thoughts. Everybody thought of something, so why couldn’t he hear me? Hmmmm... I was sure that he had heard everything I had been thinking of. How strange it was that Sam was

thinking of me at the same time. He couldn’t hear me either. What did this mean? I had been talking to Jake just a few minutes ago. Why couldn’t he hear my now? I started to think of my mother and her powers. Did I have similar powers when I was a wolf? Could I choose who I wanted to hear my thoughts? I had to talk to my parents and Carlisle about this later. Sam was in the lead. He ran to an open field and then stopped. All the wolves came to a halt. I could hear him talking to Jake. I heard everything he said. All the other wolves looked at them, wondering what happened between their leaders. Every now and then Jake looked at me, and when he did, so did all the others. They knew that the two pack leaders were talking about me. Then I heard Seth talking to me. Don’t worry Nessie, everything is going to work out just fine. I chose to communicate with him. I told him that I didn’t worry, and that I thought it was quite cool to be a wolf. When Quil and Embry heard our conversation, they joined in as well. I could see and hear that Jake was happy. His pack had welcomed me into their inner circle. Sam wasn’t quite so happy. He was actually more nervous. He didn’t like this latest twist. He didn’t mean that anyone was to blame, but he worried more how this would affect their future. I decided that it was my turn to talk. I couldn’t have surprised them more. They all jumped when they heard my thoughts. Sam and Jake just stirred at me. I heard all their thoughts, but they could only hear what I wanted them to. I could make the two packs’ hear each other.

Sam started to talk to me. Nessie, can you hear this? Can you hear me? I nodded and answered him back. Yes Sam, I can. I can hear all your thoughts. Suddenly Jake spoke. I can hear Pauls’ thoughts. Are you doing this? I nodded again. Sam and Jake started talking again. What pack did I belong to since I could hear all their thoughts? They had to find out. They asked me if it was ok if they experimented a bit. This was a new twist that they had never heard of before. I told them that it was ok, that I didn’t mind. They told me that they were going to command me to do things, because a wolf always listened and obeyed their leader. We decided to phase. I ran into the woods to change. I knew that I was silly, but I didn’t want them to see me naked. I knew all about that from Leah. She told me how hard it was for her when she heard the other guys thinking about her without her clothes. I didn’t want to go through the same thing. As I walked out of the woods, everyone was waiting for me. Sam said that he wanted to start. It was ok with me. Sam looked at me with a smug expression on his face. It looked like he was sure that I would follow his command. He towered over me. He told me to kneel in front of him, to acknowledge him as my rightful leader. I heard the alpha in his voice, but it didn’t affect me. I still stood up right. He tried again, but nothing happened. I could see the disappointment in his face. He really hoped that I would follow him.

Jake walked over to us. He said that it was his turn now. He was really confident. He knew that he was the true alpha, so he was sure that I would obey him. He looked down at me with his beautiful eyes, and commanded me to kiss him. I started to laugh. Are you asking as a boyfriend, or as an alpha Jake, I said? He looked a bit disappointed. I had heard the alpha in his voice, but it didn’t affect me. I told him to ask me something else. He thought for a bit, and then he told me to run around the clearing. I didn’t move. Sam and Jake both looked surprised. There were two alphas, and I answered to none of them. We didn’t really understand this, and we had to figure out what to do. I told them that I wanted to think about it for a while, and talk to my other family about it. After that I would meet with them again. For now, I was a free agent. I smiled at them, turned around, and ran off. I didn’t phase back. I ran just as fast in my human form as I did in my wolf form. It took me just a few minutes to get back to the Cullen house. They were all waiting for me, all eight of them. They all stirred at me. This was going to be a long day, and I was already tired. Edward was the one to speak first: Nessie, sweetheart, we can all see that you are tired, so we’ll cut this meeting short and continue again tomorrow so that you can go to your room and get some sleep. Ah, my darling father. He understood me so well. Not just that. He COULD read my mind, and knew how I felt.

I looked at my family. Has Edward and Bella told you what happened to me today? Carlisle nodded, and said yes, He told us everything up to the point where you took off with the wolves. After that we know nothing. I looked at Edward. Didn’t you listen in on us? No, he said. I thought that you wanted to tell us what happened yourself, and I wanted to give you some privacy. You don’t have to tell us anything if you don’t want to. It’s all up to you. It’s okay. I’ll tell you everything. They nodded, so I started to tell them what happened in the clearing. When I came to the part where I told them that I could choose who I wanted to hear my thoughts, Bella and Edward looked at each other. I continued. I just told them that I wanted to question them about it later. When I told them about Sam and Jake trying to command me with their alpha voice and nothing happened, they all gawped. That’s it I said. That’s what happened. They still looked at me, like I was from a different planet or something. What I said, what is it? This is really strange Nessie. This has never happened before Carlisle told me. He and Jake had discussed the wolves and vampires lives and legends a lot in the past years. They shared a common interest in the legends of their people. Carlisle knew more than I did about the wolves, and I had been to a lot off bonfires and meetings to hear about their legends. Carlisle started to tell us about the wolves and their heritage. The wolves belong to a pack. There has never been a wolf that stood alone. Not at least one that wasn’t an alpha. No one had ever heard about it before.

The reason for me not letting the others hear my thoughts, most probably came from my parents. But it was strange that those powers just worked when I was a wolf. We talked about it for a couple of more hours, and then Carlisle ordered me to bed. I had to rest, and this had been one of the strangest days in my life.

June 28
When I woke up the next day, Jake was sitting next to my bed. I smiled at him. It was hard for me to stay away from him. Now I knew what he must have felt every time he saw me. He leaned over and kissed me. Good morning love. How did you sleep? Like a baby, I said, and smiled at him. I loved the way he looked at me, like I was his whole world. Well, in fact I was, and he was mine... I’m going to take a shower, and get dressed. I’ll meet you in the clearing okay? He nodded, kissed me and told me that he loved me. I love you to I said. I thought he had left the room. I was just about to get undressed when I heard something move. You know, I could wash your backside. It was Jake. I laughed, picked up a shoe, and threw it at him. If you want me to spend the day with you, you have to get out of my room, I said. I was still laughing. He came over to me again. Kissed me. It was a longer and deeper kiss this time. He was excited, I could feel it. He wanted me, and I wanted him. Suddenly he put his hand under my t-shirt and started to rub my back. I

had problems with concentrating now. We were both breathing heavily. Then he let me go without any warning, turned around, and left the room. He left me standing there unsatisfied. I almost fell to the ground. I had lost my balance. He could have taken me there on the floor, and I wouldn’t have protested. I shook my head, found some clothes and rushed into the bathroom. The reason: I couldn’t wait to see Jake again. I wanted more. For the first time in my life, I was sexually frustrated. Usually, it took me just a few minutes to take a shower, but now I had been in here for over thirty minutes. I had to calm down before I went to see my parents and Jake. We had to have a serious talk about our future plans soon. Marriage was high up on my list now. I couldn’t wait to move in to my own house with Jake, and for us two to start a family. Actually, I was a bit uncertain about that part. Would I be able to have children? I was part wolf, part vampire and part human. Leah had once told me that while she was a wolf, she wouldn’t be able to have children. So I had a dilemma. I would first have to talk to Jake about it, and then, if I could convince him to, discuss it with Carlisle. He might have an idea how we could solve this problem. Enough thinking. I rushed to get finished. Ran outside where I met Bella and Edward. I told them that I was going to see Jake. They both kissed my cheek, and then I ran off to see my love. As soon as I was out of sight, I took of my clothes and tied them to my leg. I phased. I ran as fast as I could to

the clearing. Suddenly I stopped. I heard something, a strange sound. What was it? It sounded like snoring. I walked closer, careful not to make a sound. It was Jake. He was deep asleep. He looked so beautiful. I couldn’t help myself. I licked his face gently. He stopped snoring, made a sound that sounded like MMMM, turned around, and continued to sleep. I could have sat there forever and just watch him sleep, but I decided to phase back. Since Jake was asleep, and no one was around, I just turned around, walked a few steps back and phased. I started to get dressed. I had just put my pants on when I felt like someone was watching me. I turned around. Jake was lying there with his eyes wide open, and he was staring at me like was a treat. I swallowed hard, turned around again, and put the rest of my clothes on. Before I could move again, Jake was in front of me. You know, I could get used to waking up to this sight every morning he said with a grin on his face. I blushed. I thought you were still sleeping I said, still embarrassed. Well I was, but then something touched my cheek, and I woke up. The sight I saw was so good, that I didn’t want to disturb you. He walked over to me and kissed me. It was the same kind of kiss that he gave me in my room. How would we be able to stop ourselves this time? I wanted him just as much as he wanted me. Would we be able to wait for our wedding night? Well, the real question was: DID I WANT TO WAIT???