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New Girl: Fathers love Stephon O. Smith Northwood University

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Abstract Threw personal experience and situational reality imitated by the hit show New Girl ! this essay explores the extent to what adolescent males experience when a "ather is either absent or in and out o" the up brin# o" a youn# male.

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$n today%s society the "ather son bond has been #reatly severed between the two. $n America! it%s is said that a third o" the children in this nation live without their "ather. The #rowin# trend o" missin# "athers in children%s li"e could have pro"ound results "or society! researchers say! because havin# dad around has been lin&ed to important developments in a child%s physical! emotional and behavioral health. $n the '(th episode o" the second season o" the hit show New Girl ! this statistic is imitated between the character Nic& and his "ather when he shows up unannounced. $n episode '( o" New Girl ! Nic&! who hasn%t seen his unpredictable con artist o" a "ather in years suddenly shows up at his apartment durin# a #ame o" )ystery *up with his roommates. $n shoc&! Nic& stru##les to come to reason as o" why his "ather is has shown up. +nowin# his "ather,s bac&#round! he warns his roommates to not buy into his "athers second chance wishes. Althou#h all roommates were warned! -ess! who states! $%m a suc&er "or second chances! is coned into buyin# a horse by Nic&s "ather. with intentions o" sellin# the horse "or a lar#e pro"it and returnin# -ess none o" her money. Once Nic& "inds out about his "ather,s plan he demands he pays -ess bac& and leaves. -ess "orces them to ma&e up! and so they do! but what seemed li&e it would be a happy endin# and new "ound love between the two did not last. The next mornin# -ess "inds Nic&s "arther tryin# to snea& out o" the apartment a"ter promisin# Nic& to a baseball #ame. Once -ess tells Nic&! seconds a"ter his "ather le"t! Nic& says old habits never chan#e ! which in"erred he didn%t expect "or his "ather to do as he said.

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This episode o" New Girl touched home "or me! $ could relate to everythin# to all the emotions and "eelin#s Nic& had towards his dad. his "ather portrayed in the episode and mine are very similar. Althou#h $ didn%t #row completely without my "ather! he was in and out my li"e because o" who his is! a con man. A"ter processin# that his "ather was actually at his place! Nic& said somethin# that made me thin& about mysel"! he said! while an#ry "ixin# the &itchen sin&! you wanna &now why $%m messed up! why $ don%t trust people! why $ have an#er issues! why $ have the blood pressure o" a hummin#bird ! now! althou#h $ don%t see mysel" as havin# the blood pressure o" a hummin#bird! $ can relate to his reason "or not trustin# people. A year a#o $ #ot a chance to tal& with renowned Sports psycholo#ist /r. -oe *arr! who wor&ed with 0e1ron -ames and *armelo Anthony. From the time that we spent to#ether he came to the conclusion that the reason $ had a hard time trustin# "ew men! teammates! and coaches is because $ never had that trust with my "ather. "ortunately! $ had a mother who played both roles very well. /ependin# on the a#e! "athers who leave their son may leave them with emotional wounds that can mani"est in many delin2uent characteristics! "or example! a study was conducted by /avid 1. 0ynn and 3illiam 0on Sawrey on the e""ects o" "ather4absence on boys in Norwe#ian "amilies! where the "ather was absent "or ' to 5 years! compared with other Norwe#ian "amilies in which the "ather was present. Those whom "ather wasn%t around would showed immaturity! insecure in identi"ication with the "ather! compensatory masculinity and demonstrated poor peer s&ills! this all #oes bac& to Nic&s reason to him bein# who he was presently.

The absences o" a male "i#ure such as a "ather has also been lin&ed to hostility amon#st youn# men. 1oys are #enerally more a##ressive in their disruptive behaviors and more "re2uently

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"ollow noncompliant behavior paths 6e.#.! Allison 7 Furstenber#! '898. :etherin#ton! *ox! 7 *ox! '89;. :etherin#ton et al.! '895<. This type o" behavior on the other hand can be loo&ed at as a short term behavior pattern! as the sane #oes! time heals all . )orman and Floyd 65==5< ar#ue that the culture o" the detached authoritarian "ather is #ivin# way to a role o" an involved! nurturin# "ather. This hints that more "athers whom may have been absent in their children%s li"e are attemptin# to ma&es matters ri#ht. $n Nic& and his "ather! the #ame that his "ather was supposed to ta&e him to was the symbolism o" him tryin# to ma&e thin#s ri#ht! but in reality there is much more to "ixin# a bro&en relationship between parent and child. in this case "ather and son. /iamond 65==>< says that in raisin# a son! "athers can #ain a sense o" empathy "or their own "athers, past behaviors and decisions. in doin# so! men should appreciate that their "athers, actions were #enerally ?#ood enou#h, thou#h not per"ect . This statement by /iamond narrows down the situations between Nic& and his "ather. 3hat we don%t &now! what the show doesn%t in"orm us on is who raised Nic&s "ather or the type o" man Nic&s "athers "ather was! maybe! he could be the reason why Nic&s "ather is the way that he is! this we do not &now! but /iamonds claim also explains why Nic&! althou#h was an#ry at his "ather "or (= years! stated that it was #ood to see his "ather! that everyone ma&es mista&es! and that people don%t chan#e. @ven thou#h nic&s "ather didn%t truly heal their relationship! what he did was! un&nowin#ly mad Nic& come to a realiAation o" whom his "ather is and althou#h he isn%t per"ect he%s #ood enou#h. 3inston! another roommate o" Nic& and -ess! while at the race trac&! stated to Nic& that his "ather le"t him when he was three years old and never came bac&! that Nic& should be than&"ul that he even #ets to see his "ather. $ stran#ely! due to watchin#! analyAin#! and writin# about this topic and episode o" New Girl ! have seen the li#ht . This has made me realiAe that althou#h havin# bro&en relationship

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with my "ather! althou#h it has played a critical role in my bein# able to trust! they will have to come a time when dealin# with the cards dealt is the only option! to not allow a missin# "ather to de"ine the ma&eup o" mysel"! and learn to accept my "ather "or who and what he is.

Be"erences Allison! C. A.! 7 Furstenber#! F. F. 6'898<. :ow marital dissolution a""ects children: variations by a#e and sex. /evelopmental Csycholo#y! 5;! ;D=4;D8.

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1eaty! 0. A. 6'88;<. @""ects o" paternal absence on male adolescents% peer relations and sel"4 ima#e. Adolescence! (=6'5=<! 9>(. /iamond )-. 5==>. )y "ather be"ore me: :ow "athers and sons in"luence each other throu#hout their lives. Norton: New Eor&. :orn! 3.! 7 Sylvester! T. 65==5<. U. S. /epartment o" :ealth and :uman Services! Substance Abuse and )ental :ealth Services Administration 6SA):SA<. 6'88F<. The relationship between "amily structure and adolescent substance abuse. Boc&ville! )/: National *learin#house "or Alcohol and /ru# $n"ormation. :arper! *.! 7 )c0anahan! S. S. 6'889<. Father absence and youth incarceration. Caper presented at the Annual )eetin# o" the American Sociolo#ical Association! San Francisco! *A. 1renner! @. 6'888<. Fathers in prison: A review o" the data. Chiladelphia! CA: National *enter on Fathers and Families. bac& 0ynn! /avid 1.. Sawrey! 3illiam 0.65==(<. The e""ects o" "ather4absence on Norwe#ian boys and #irls. The -ournal o" Abnormal and Social Csycholo#y! Gol ;865<!! 5;945F5. doi: '=.'=(>Hh==D=>9D )iller! @. /. 65='(<. 3hy the Father 3ound )atters: *onse2uences "or )ale )ental :ealth and the Father4Son Belationship. *hild Abuse Beview! 556(<! '8D45=9. doi:'=.'==5Hcar.55'8 )orman )T! Floyd +. 5==5. A ?chan#in# culture o" "atherhood,: @""ects on a""ectionate communication! closeness! and satis"action in men,s relationships with their "athers and their sons. 3estern -ournal o" *ommunication FF: (8;ID''. Sin#leton A! )aher -. 5==D. The ?new man, is in the house: Eoun# men! social chan#e! and housewor&. -ournal o" )en,s Studies '5: 55>I5D=.