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Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes

September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman


Table of Contents
Unit 1: A Journey Of Introspection: The Path to Purification 4
Chapter 1: Understanding Your Role 4
1.1.1 What is Tazkiyah? 4
1.1.2 What is Fitnah? 6
1.1.3 What is Ikhl!"? 8
1.1.4 What is Tarbiyah? 8
Chapter 2: Understanding Your Enemy 8
1.2.1 The Enemy Within: The Nafs 8
1.2.2 al-Shay#!n 9
Chapter 3: Understanding Change 10
1.3.1 Can I change? 10
1.3.2 Guidance is from All!h 11
1.3.3 Excuses for Not Correcting Oneself 13
1.3.4 The Hows and Whens of Change 14
Chapter 4: Understanding Yourself 15
1.4.1 Your $!l vs. Your Maq!m 15
1.4.2 How far away are you? 16
1.4.3 The Three Types of Nuf%s 17
1.4.4 Ba"ar vs. Ba"&rah 19
1.4.5 The Himmah Never Dies 19
Chapter 5: Experiencing Change 20
1.5.1 A Deep Look at the Tazkiyah of Umar ibn al-Khattab 20
1.5.2 The Concept of True Ladhdhah (Pleasure) 21
1.5.3 Faq&hl-Nafs 22
Unit 2: Making the Change 22
Chapter 1: Knowledge 22
2.1.1 The Importance of Seeking Knowledge 22
2.1.2 The Intention behind Seeking Knowledge 25
2.1.3 The Effort of Seeking Knowledge 26
2.1.5 The Pursuit that Never Ends: What is the greatest difficulty of knowledge? 35
Chapter 2: Minding Your Own Business 42
2.2.1 For your own good 42
2.2.2 For the good of your brother 43
2.2.3 Giving the benefit of the doubt 43
Chapter 3: Treating Destructive Flaws 45
2.3.1 Curing Bad Character 45
2.3.2 Backbiting / al-Gh&bah 47
2.3.4 Lying / al-Kadhib 55
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

2.3.6 Two-Faced Speech 58
2.3.7 Revealing Secrets 58
2.3.8 Breaking Promises 59
2.3.9 Impermissible Joking 60
2.3.10 Miscellaneous 62
2.3.11 Pride / al-Kibr 64
2.3.12 Love of Prestige/ $ubbl-J!h wa riyaasa 67
2.3.13 Showing off / al-Riy! 69
2.3.14 Self-Deceit / al-Ghur%r 73
2.3.15 Envy / al-$asad 76
2.3.17 Learning Forbearance 86
2.3.18 Greed and Miserliness 87
2.3.19 Curbing the Desire for Food and Sex (shahwul batan wal fahsh) 91
2.3.20 The Wandering Gaze (ghaddul Basar) 94
2.3.21 Breaking the Habit of Sin 101
Chapter 4: Istiq!mah 103
2.4.1 The Hardest Task 104
2.4.2 The Most Praiseworthy Task 105
2.4.3 Consistency 105
2.4.4 Discipline in ALL Areas 106
Chapter 5: Moderation: Dont Go to Extremes (Ifr!" and Tafr#") 106
2.5.1 Balance 106
2.5.2 What is True Zuhd (Asceticism)? 107
Chapter 6: Get Your Wird On 108
2.6.1 The Purpose of the Pillars 108
2.6.2 Understand your complexity! 109
2.6.3 Act with a Sense of Purpose 109
2.6.4 The P90x (insanity workout) Wird 110
2.6.5 The superstar: Abu Bakr (ra'yAll!hu anhu) 110
Chapter 7: The Daily Wird 111
2.7.1 A Share of Contemplation & Remembrance 111
2.7.2 A Share of Meaningful Obligatory Prayers 115
2.7.3 A Share of Voluntary Prayers 120
2.7.4 A Share of Qiy!m 121
2.7.5 A Share of Recitation and Memorization of the Qur!n 122
2.7.6 A share of charity 122
2.7.7 How much can I accomplish in a day? 123
Chapter 8: The Weekly Wird 124
2.8.1 Components of a Fruitful Jumuah Experience 124
2.8.2 Suratl-Kahf 125
2.8.3 Fasting Mondays and Thursdays 125
Chapter 9: The Monthly Wird 126
2.9.1 Fasting the white days 126
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

2.9.2 Recognize what month you are in! 126
2.9.3 How much Qura!n should I have finished? 126
Chapter 10: The Yearly Wird 127
2.10.1 Rama'!n 127
2.10.2 The 6 days of Shaww!l 128
2.10.3 The fasting of Araf!t, (sh%r! 128
2.10.4 Zak!h 129
2.10.5 The first 10 days of Dhul-$ijjah 129
Chapter 11: Once In A Lifetime ($ajj) 130
2.11.1 Before You Go 130
2.11.2 Inner Meanings of the Man!sik 131
2.11.3 Qualities of the Hajji 131
Final Note: Overwhelmed? 132

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Unit 1: A Journey Of Introspection: The Path to

Imam al-Ghazali wrote Ihya ulum al-din. Imam Ibn al-Jawzi summarized it first and it was
called Minhaj-ul-Qasideen. The text we are using for this class is Mukhtasir Minhaj-ul Qasideen
by Imam Ibn Qudamah al- Maqdisi that is essentially a summary of the summary (more than
400 pages). The English translation of this book is not recommended, however.

In this class we will first discuss the process of change, define tazkiya, tarbiyah and ikhlas and
see how they relate to the soul. Next, we will discuss the process of seeking knowledge and
how knowledge can be used to tame the soul. We will also discuss the destructive flaws that a
person may have and ways to cure them. Finally, we will discuss how to establish our wird
(regimen, routine) in accordance to the Qur)!n and Sunnah.
Chapter 1: Understanding Your Role
1.1.1 What is Tazkiyah?
Tazkiyah (ling.)-purification. It is similar to zakah, which has two meanings purification and
increase. Hence, why Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, "Verily, wealth does not
decrease because of charity." The ulema agree that zakah really means growth as a result of
purification. The natural effect of the soul is that we are supposed to grow closer to All!h
(sub*!nahu wa ta!la). We are supposed to incline towards All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) that is
how we were created (our fitrah).

First question you should ask yourself if you are not getting close to All!h (sub*!nahu wa
ta!la) is, What is between me and All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la)? What is preventing my heart
from benefiting from the Qur)!n? What is preventing my soul from drawing close to All!h
(sub*!nahu wa ta!la)? Ask yourself, what is preventing me from having a soul that is at
peace? Once you get rid of these things, you naturally find yourself a better person.

Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Abu Hurayrah (radi All!hu anhu) reported that the
Messenger of All!h (sal All!hu alaihi wa sallam) said, Everyone of my Ummah will enter
Jannah except those who refuse. He was asked: Who will refuse? He (sal All!hu alaihi wa
sallam) said, Whoever obeys me, shall enter Jannah, and whosoever disobeys me, has refused
(to enter Jannah).

It is only natural that we return home, where we came from (Jannah). All!h (sub*!nahu wa
ta!la) did not make it a secret, he gave us a direct practical path on how to attain Jannah. So
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

long as we clear the toxins and poisons from our live, we naturally incline towards All!h
(sub*!nahu wa ta!la) because of our fitrah.

"Wil l they not then ponder the Qur' an or are there l ocks upon their hearts?"
[Muhammad, 47:24]

We naturally benefit from the Qur)!n. Notice that All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) is not saying we
dont pray enough or read enough Qur)!n, but is rather pointing out the state of the Qur)!n.

Tazkiya is natural growth as a result of purification.

Who is responsible for purifying the soul? It is your job.

And [by] the soul and He who proportioned it
And inspired it [with discernment of] its
wickedness and its righteousness,
He has succeeded who purifies it,
And he has failed who instills it [with corruption].
(Surah as Shams 91:7-10)

All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) swears by many different things, by the immovable, by the
alternation of night and day, by the heavens, and by the earth in the Qur)!n. Imam Ibn
Qayyim Rahimullah comments that All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) swears either because he is
not being believed or to emphasize the severity of something. In Surah As-Shams All!h
swears more than any other place in the Qur)!n just to get to one highlight, these verses
above. He has put the burden of tazkiya on us. But at the same time, we turn to All!h
(sub*!nahu wa ta!la) to help us in this purification. All!h also says in S%ratl-Ala: He has
succeeded who has purified Himself. All!h is swearing that the person who purifies himself is
successful. The effort comes from the person.

Its important to not misunderstand verse 8. All!h did not make us evil, but rather gave us the
conscious to distinguish between good and evil. All!h also mentions that the one who does not
achieve tazkiya will be a failure, as a result of his/her heedlessness and disobedience.

When the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was asleep, even then his heart was awake. But
we are different. Every single night when we are sleep, our nafs, our soul leaves our body. But
even when you are sleeping you can be engaged in purification by supplicating to All!h
(sub*!nahu wa ta!la).
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Dua for sleeping: Oh All!h, I lay in submission to you. Oh All!h, if you hold my soul with you,
forgive it and show mercy to it and if you decide to send it back to me, then protect it the way
you protect your righteous servants.

Asking Allaah for Taqwa and Purification of the Soul

All!humma, aati nafsee taqwaaha, wa zakkihaa Anta khairu man zakkaahaa, Anta Waliyyuhaa
wa Maulaaha
Translation: O All!h, grant my soul taqwa and purify it, You are the Best of those who purify
it, You are its Protecting Friend and Guardian/Master.

What is the goal of tazkiyatun nafs? The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) answered that it
is the servant knowing his Lord is watching him wherever he may be. This is very similar to
ihsan, and hence the minimum goal of tazkiya to gain taqwa. In essence the greater level of
taqwa is to reach al ihsan. Ihsan is when you are worshipping All!h as if you can see him.

Abu Hurayrah, radhiAllaahu 'anhu, was asked about taqwa. He said, "It is a road full of thorns.
One who walks it needs to have extreme patience." On such a road, you naturally hold/restrain
yourself to make sure none of the thorns prick you. If a thorn does happen to prick you,
however, you dont just continue the same path. You put yourself back in your place. You are
aware that All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) is watching you and with you wherever you are.

It is the greatest state of taqwa a person can have. In the &ad#th of Jibr&l, when Jibr&l said to the
Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam), Tell me about i&s!n. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam) said, To worship All!h as if you can see Him and if you cannot see Him then know that
He sees you.

The goal of tazkiya is ihsan. We will not get to it all in one weekend, but in essence goal of that
is ihsan; when we worship All!h as if we can see him. Once you worship All!h (sub*!nahu wa
ta!la) as if you see him, you realize your full potential. All!h says, Or (lest) he should say
when he sees the torment, If only I had another chance (to return to the world) then I should
indeed be among al-muhsineen (the good-doers). 39:59

Can we purify ourselves by ourselves, however? No. All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) gives us a
form of purification-fitnah.
1.1.2 What is Fitnah?
Fitnah is the ever companion to mankind.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

A#a Rahimullah said, Had it not been for tragedies in our lives, we would have shown up on
the Day of Judgment completely bankrupt. At the end of the day, no matter how much we do.
We are not going to be able to perfect oursleves. All!h sends us fitnah (tests and trials) so that
we can be purified from our sins. These are gifts.

Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) used to seek refuge from a sudden death. When All!h
allows a person to struggle, to go through some hardship that is All!h purifying him/her from
their sins. Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, All!h will continue to test the beliver or
try them until he purifies them for all of his sins until he meets All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) like
a newborn baby. Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, There is a special valley in
paradise for people of Shams. When the companions asked why, the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi
wa sallam) replied, Because the angels of All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) are shading the people of

Sometimes fitnah brings out the best in people, sometimes the worst in people. Think of the
example of Asiya (radiAll!hu anha). Whenever she was being tortured, All!h (sub*!nahu wa
ta!la) allowed her to be shaded. She lived her life as queen and instead of crying, she was
laughing while being tortured. It strengthened her faith.

Tragedy and tyranny often brings people back to All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la). In Palestine, 50-
60 years ago masajids used to be empty. People did not wear hijabs. After the oppression they
went through, people started filling up the Masajid and wearing hijabs. Similarly in Syria, the
oppression that they went through increased them in faith. People that did not used to go the
masjid want to go there now and are saying without any hesitation that All!h (sub*!nahu wa
ta!la) is their Lord.

There was a video of a 20-year-old boy who was being told to make sujood to Bashar Al-Asad.
He said I have never made sujood to All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) in my life, and I will not make
my first sujood to Bashar Al-Asad. He died making his first sujood to All!h (sub*!nahu wa
ta!la). SubhanAll!h.

Tests and trials make for a better person. It brings out the best in people. Fitnah is a gift
All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) sends us IF we recognize it.

Tazkiya is to purify. Fitnah is the process through which precious metals are purified. To
make jewelry out of precious metals, one must first burn off its impurities. Similarly when we
burn off our impurities, it brings us to a state of ikhlas. Im!m Ibn al-Qayyim said, Sins need to
be burned either with the pain of regret in this world or the fire of Hell in the hereafter. In
this world sins are burned off through tazkiya from our part and fitnah from All!h until we
arrive at ikhlas.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

1.1.3 What is Ikhl!"?
Ikhlas literally means purity. The word ikhlas is not mentioned one time in Suratl-Ikhlas.
But three surahs before, in Surat-l-Kafirun there is declaration for absolute purification and
absolving of oneself from all of the gods except All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la). Then is S%ratl-
Na'r is mentioned victory for those who purify themselves. Next S%ratl-Masad declares
humiliation for those who decided to keep themselves filthy. Abu Lahab refused to purify
himself from shirk, so he will stay in Hellfire.

Then we arrive at al-Ikhlas, a declaration of purity. I worship no one besides All!h
(sub*!nahu wa ta!la). Kalimah shahada la ilaha illAll!h is called Kalimatl ikhlas. It starts off
with negation; there is no god/deity worthy of worship or unconditional obedience except for
All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la). You must purify yourself from everything else except All!h
(sub*!nahu wa ta!la).

1.1.4 What is Tarbiyah?
After gold is purified, it must be shaped. Tarbiyah literally means to shape.

There are some that are sincere, but they dont realize their potential. And there are some
people that are sincere but they dont like to act out their sincerity. If we leave pure gold out,
it will start to rust again. Tarbiyah is actively engaging your soul to keep it in a state of

Many times we see a person get a serious wake up call in their lives when some kind of
calamity strieks them like someone dying in the family. They feel super religious and come to
the masjid. But they dont do things to actually change their lives. Few weeks later we see
them regressing back to exactly what they were doing before, because there was nothing in
place to keep the soul engaged, pure, beautified and maximizing its potential.
Chapter 2: Understanding Your Enemy
1.2.1 The Enemy Within: The Nafs

In Surah An-Naziat All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) say, and the one who forbids his own nafs,
his own self, from pursuing empty desires, his abode will be Jannah (79: 39-40). The first thing
we need to do is fight our own nafs.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Verily a person will be engaged in a state of
struggle and has not once been struck with a sword. Scholars say the greatest struggle is the
struggle against yourself. Many times we like to just blame Shay"!n, however.

Nafs is hard to recognize as the enemy as its always sneaking up on us. Sometimes we hear
those whispers inside of us and think its Shay"!n, but its really ourselves. When our own soul
is commanding us to do those evil and we need to fight it. Stop blaming Shay"!n, its not always
his fault.

People wonder why we do/continue bad deeds in Ramadan when its a blessed month and
Shay#!n is locked up? Its because our nafs is corrupted.
1.2.2 al-Shay#!n
All!h says, Verily, my slaves you have no power over them, except for those who willingly
follow you. Shay#!n has absolutely no power over you, if you dont willingly follow him.
Adam (alayhi wa sallam) did not blame Shay"!n when he erred. He blamed himself. But
Shay#!n when he erred, he blamed All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la). Sometimes we do that also
when we say, If All!h wants to take me out of haram, he will do so. Or that, All!h has set me
up to fail.

In essence, for some people Shay#!n is extremely active and for some Shay#!n is very laid back.
For some Shay#!n does not have to do much as you are doing all the work yourself. And for
some Shay#!n is active. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Shay"!n places
obstacles in every way the son of (dam undertakes to obey All!h.

Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) is telling us the way Shay"!n works on you. First he
obstructs his way to Islam by saying, Will you adopt Islam and abandon the religion of your
family and what you were raised upon? He tells Shay"!n to go away and disobeys Shay"!n and
becomes Muslim. Then the Shay"!n hinders his path for hijrah (emigrating for the sake of All!h
to Mad&nah). Shay"!n comes to the man and says, Will you emigrate and abandon your land
and everything that you have and your wealth and your shops? A person will come and take
everything that you had. [What Shay"!n said was coming true because they looted the stores
in Makkah.] The man says, Go away and disobeys him and still emigrates for the sake of
All!h. [When the man is going to engage in battle, they are outnumbered.] Shay"!n comes to
the person and says, Are you going to sacrifice your life and someone else will share a bed with
your spouse? Your wealth will be distributed amongst your inheritors and no one will care for
you. The man disobeys him and continues in the path. All!h has made it a right upon Himself
to admit that person to Paradise whether he drowns, is cast off of a mountain, dies of a stomach
disease, is hit by a dabbah (moving saddle). Why? He is not letting Shay#!n in.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Im!m al-$asan al-Ba"ri said, If Shay"!n sees you consistently obeying All!h, he will seek you
time and time again. If Shay"!n sees that he is not getting anywhere with you eventually he
will grow weary of you and reject you. But if a person keeps going back and forth, Shay"!n
continues to have hope.

Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said everyone has their own Shay"!n, and he flows in
your veins like the blood. (ishah (ra(yAll!hu anha) said, Even you? He said, Even me, but
my Shay"!n aslam. The scholars say either he became Muslim or submitted/gave up.

You let Shay"!n in through the characteristics that you have developed. Imam Ibn al-Qayyim
said The mind is like a mill, as long as you have useful grain inside of it, nothing else can get
in. Hence, the only time Shay#!n has influence over a person is when All!h (sub*!nahu wa
ta!la) is not enough for him. All!h asks in the Qur)!n, Isnt All!h enough for him? When
All!h is enough for you, Shay#!n loses appeal.

On the night All!h's Apostle was taken on a night journey (Miraaj) two cups, one containing
wine and the other milk, were presented to him at Jerusalem. He looked at it and took the cup
of milk. Gabriel said, "Praise be to All!h Who guided you to Al-Fitra (the right path); if you
had taken (the cup of) wine, your nation would have gone astray." The word used for going
astray is ghaween-which means a child who refuses to breastfeed. As long as youre willing to
take the milk (ilm), Shay#!n has no appeal for you. Dont be spiritually lactose intolerant and
refuse to drink the milk, because thats when Shay#!n will get you.

When Im!m A*mad was dying, he was between consciousness and being awake. His son
Abdull!h was sitting with him and telling him to say la il!ha illa All!h. Im!m A*mad says,
No! Not yet! No! Not yet! Abdull!h later asks him, What happened to you? He said, I
saw my Shay"!n in a dream, and he appeared humiliated and in raggedy clothes and broken
and said, O A*mad, you have escaped me. Im!m A*mad was telling him, No, not yet.
Shay#!n will come at you consistently, but dont give Shay#!n an entrance into you and
Shay#!n will not have any power over you. It starts off with not blaming Shay#!n, but
blaming yourself for your mistakes.

Shay#!n whispers into the hearts of men and then he withdraws. iza ghafala waswas, wa izha
zakarullah, khannas. When humans become heedless, Shay#!n is able to whisper to him. And
if he remembers All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la), he flees away. Its always in our control whether
or not we not we listen to Shay#!n.
Chapter 3: Understanding Change
1.3.1 Can I change?
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Dont despair of the mercy of All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la). But dont place too much hope in it
that it leads to wishful thinking and delusion. Be aware of extremes. Dont become hopeless in
your ability to change. Giving excuses like, I was born with a bad temper or that I was born
with this attribute and claiming All!h will forgive is simply wishful thinking and also making
bad assumptions about All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la). It is similar to claiming All!h cannot
change you and that he made you deficient.

Im!m al-$asan al-Ba"ri said, The nafs is like a strong horse. The goal is not to kill it but to
tame it. But whats worse than a weak horse? It is a wild, untamed horse. Islam does not want
to kill your characteristics; Islam wants to polish your characteristics. Islam strengthens your
traits. Islam gives you confidence. If you allow your confidence to become arrogance, however,
thats a problem. It is good to have a strong and powerful horse as long as you are in control of
it and it is not in control of you. All!h does tell us in the Qur)!n those who swallow their
anger and not those who do not have anger. Know when to use your anger and when not to
use your anger. Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) used his anger at the right times and it
wasnt for his own ego, but for All!h. But dont go attacking every person under the banner of
anger for All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la). It applies in very, very limited circumstances.

Im!m al-Ghaz!li said, How can human beings claim that they cannot change? A bear can be
tamed into being friendly. A falcon can go from being a savage to being a guide. A dog can go
from being an attacker to a friend. If an animal can change, it is a sign for us that even we can

Yes, everyone can change. And to claim that you cannot is an accusation against All!h
(sub*!nahu wa ta!la). But there is a condition; the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam)
said, All!h has given for every disease its cure. This includes spiritual diseases and
problems, but you have to be willing to go through the pain of it. You must be willing to
take the medicine, as bitter and nasty as it is. If medicine tastes good it means its not
effective medicine.

We have to take practical steps to cure ourselves of our diseases. And in Islam we have those
answers, step-by-step guidance on how to address our problems.
1.3.2 Guidance is from All!h

AoJ jsome] omooq tbelt fotbets ooJ tbelt
JesceoJoots ooJ tbelt btotbets - ooJ we
cbose tbem ooJ we qolJeJ tbem to o
sttolqbt potb. (5otob ol-Aom 6. 87)

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

AoJ Allb lovltes to tbe nome of leoce ooJ
qolJes wbom ne wllls to o sttolqbt potb
(5otob oos 10.25)

AoJ so tbose wbo wete qlveo koowleJqe moy
koow tbot lt ls tbe ttotb ftom yoot lotJ ooJ
jtbetefote] belleve lo lt, ooJ tbelt beotts
bombly sobmlt to lt. AoJ loJeeJ ls Allb tbe
ColJe of tbose wbo bove belleveJ to o
sttolqbt potb. (5otob ol-nojj 22.54)

8y wblcb Allb qolJes tbose wbo potsoe nls
pleosote to tbe woys of peoce ooJ btloqs
tbem oot ftom Jotkoesses loto tbe llqbt, by
nls petmlssloo, ooJ qolJes tbem to o
sttolqbt potb. (5otob ol-MlJob 5.16)

All!h says in the Qur)!n: When they turned away, All!h turned their hearts away. They
became unworthy of guidance. The first one to turn away was not All!h. All!h tells us in the
Qur)!n that those who seek guidance will be guided. Those who strive in Our way, We
guide them to the various paths of good. If you make the effort to turn towards All!h
(sub*!nahu wa ta!la), He will guide you.

Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, The hearts are between two fingers of the
fingers of the Most Merciful. If All!h wills, He guides it or turns it away. If you keep
working on yourself, one day you will finally taste guidance. The same Salah you will feel
will finally mean something.

You may be trying to get khush% in your 'al!h and keep trying and all of a sudden you might
pray salah and truly feel its effect.

Shaykh mentioned that once there was a guy with military boots that walked into the masjid.
All the brown people ran as the man walked up to Shaykh Omar and said, I need to talk to
you. They went to the library of the masjid and he said, My name is Keith. I just got back
from Iraq 2 hours ago and havent even seen my family. When I was in Iraq and I saw how
much those people believed in their faith, so much so, that even when we brought our guns in
masajid they didnt flinch. I got amazed and I knew they had something. And I want what they
have. I dont know what it is about you people, but I want what you have. He didnt know
anything about Islam and after a 20 minute introduction he took shahada. When he heard the
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

loud takbeer, he started to cry. He said, When we used to hear it in Iraq it meant RUN, now
its welcoming me to faith.

We strive, toil, and struggle and when we are sincere, All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) does
eventually provide us with guidance. Just think of the before and after picture of Umar
(ra'yAll!hu anhu). No one has ever turned to All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la), and he was turned

The most frequent supplication of the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was: Yaa Muqallib
Al-Quloob Thabbit Qalbee Alaa Deenik. Translation: O Changer of Hearts, keep my heart
steadfast on Your religion.
We have to be serious when we ask All!h for guidance, because we know at the end of the day
we cant achieve it without All!hs help.

According to Shaykh-ul-Islam the best dua is: All!humma a-inni ala Zikrika wa shukrika wa
husni ibadatika. Translation: O All!h! Help me to remember you, to thank you, and to
worship you in the best of manners. You are asking All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) to guide you.
1.3.3 Excuses for Not Correcting Oneself
To show dissatisfaction with yourself is to show dissatisfaction with All!h. All!h says, I am
what my servant expects of me... But some people stretch this too far, banking on All!hs
mercy too much. Imam Ibn Qayyim said, You cannot change the attributes of All!h
(sub*!nahu wa ta!la) by thinking of him in a different way. All!h cannot be unjust and when
we exaggerate one attribute over another or make up a new one we are distorting His real
attributes. We do our best then we think of All!h as the Most Merciful.

In an interview with Nancy Ajram, a famous singer, when she was asked what she would say to
All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) on the Day of Judgement? She said, Im going to tell him, youre
going to enter me into Jannah. SubhanAll!h- with such arrogance youre going to enter
Jannah? It would be unjust for All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) to enter a person into Jannah who
made no effort whatsoever. People came before us who died, who strove, were struck by
lightning, and faced earthquakes, diseases and much more and yet stayed firm on the path. Is it
fair that All!h enters them into Jannah and also enters someone who made no effort for it
whatsoever? No, thats wishful thinking.

Some common excuses:

1. Blaming All!h and his decrees for your characteristics
This person blames their family, their qadr for their characteristics. Im!m Ibn Qud!mah
says, To say my evil deed is not my fault, but All!hs fault because All!h created me, is like
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

a person having a child out of adultery and then saying that they are not going to pay for
the child because All!h created the child. All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) is the creator, no
doubt about that; but you take the steps to bring about the baby. Blaming All!h for your
bad deeds and characteristics is just as senseless as this.

Im!m Ibn al-Qayyim said in his book al-Faw!id, Abu Talib, uncle of the Prophet died a
chief of the hypocrites. While Salman-al-Farsi, whose father was a priest for the fire-
worshippers, was safe on the coast. Al-Wal&d b. al-Mugh&rah, the honor of the Arabs,
preceded all in straying away from All!h, while Suhayb, the Roman, excelled above all
Arabs in belief. Al-N!jashi was in Abyssinia and called labbayk all!humma labbayk. Bil!l, the
slave, called out, )al!h is better than sleep. Abul-$akam (Abu Jahl) fell deaf and became
the father of ignorance. Qis ibn Sa'aadah, a famous poet, believed in All!h despite never
seeing Ras%lull!h. Abdull!h b. Ubayy al-Sal%l prayed behind the Prophet ('allall!hu alayhi
wa sallam) for years and still died a disbeliever. No excuses; it doesnt matter who is your
imam, who your parents are, where you are from. These stories of the sahabahs destroy all
forms of excuse.

Some people do have it harder than others, and has given some more favorable situations
than others. But at the same time All!h has given everyone a chance. If a person is not
given to believe, then on the day of responsibility they are absolved of that responsibility.
They will be raised up and All!h will test them in another way. All!h does not punish a
people until a messenger reaches them.

2. Self pity or blaming people of religiosity for their own being astray
Some common excuses this group uses are: all shaykhs are liars, crooks, etc., Those
people in the masjid are the worst people, they are so judgmental, so I dont go there, Ive
seen the worst hijabis in this world, they dont really practice, Look that person, he prays
and he is a terrible person. I dont pray, but Im not shady in my business. These might be
true but youll still be responsible for yourself on the Day of Judgment. You still have to go
to the masjid, wear hijab and pray. You chastise yourself; you dont blame others or All!h.

One of Shaykhs favorite quote, Im not overweight, Im just 9 inches too short (Shelley
1.3.4 The Hows and Whens of Change
1. Things that cannot be changed.
The sun, the moon, the earth, and other constants in the universe. There are no human
characteristics or qualities that cannot be changed.

2. Things that have potential but, if not nourished properly, will go to waste.
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September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Imam Al-Ghaz!li gave the example that you cant plant a date seed and expect to grow apples
and you cant plant an apple seed and expect to grow dates. All!h gave us unique qualities,
but if we dont nourish them properly, then those qualities will go to waste. There is nothing
inside of us that cannot be tamed.

3. Things that are harmful but can be destroyed with effort ranging from very little to great.
One might have grown up in a family with hot temper, or a environment of gossip and
developed some bad qualities as a result. But All!h has given for every disease its cure.

4. Things that can go both ways
Take the example of Umar (ra(yAll!hu anhu) and Abu Jahl. Both had leadership qualities,
courage, bravery, ability to mobilize people, and wisdom. Umar (ra(yAll!hu anhu) used his
qualities to bring victory to Islam, whereas Abu Jahl used it for the opposite. We often see
people who are brilliant and can only think only if they used that for Islam. We have been
blessed with many special qualities by All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) and we can either use it for
good or for bad.

Im!m al-Dhahabi narrates in his biography of the notables (the companions) a story of a man
named Jadan who used to be a singer. One day, Abdull!h b. Mas%d was passing by and
heard him singing and said, If only he would use that voice to recite Qur)!n. Jadan heard
it and started to cry and ran after Abdull!h b. Mas%d. He repented and became Abdull!h b.
Mas%ds student and one of the best Qaris.

Facebook is an example of a tool that can go both ways.
Chapter 4: Understanding Yourself
1.4.1 Your $!l vs. Your Maq!m

The difference between your situation and station. Your &!l is the situation you are in right
now but you dont necessarily reach maq!m until it becomes a pattern of behavior. We use
hal when asking how someone is-kaifal hal. Their situation is constantly changing, one
moment happy, next sad, angry, etc.

Maq!m is the station, it is something stable. For example: the station of truthfulness, the
station of generosity, the station of forbearance. When All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la) says, al-
'!bir#n wal-'!bir!t and all these lofty positions, these are people who have reached a
pattern of behavior so that they are called by that name. Doing something one time doesnt
mean that quality is attributed to you. Can a liar tell the truth? Yes, but it doesnt make him
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

a truthful person for telling a truth one time. If you restrain your anger one time, it doesnt
make you a forbearing person all of a sudden.

There is a difference between something that defines you and something you do once or
twice. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Verily a person will tell the truth
continuously until he is written with All!h as 'idd#q. A person will lie until All!h writes him
down as a liar. He ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) also said, Verily, truthfulness leads to good
deeds and good deeds guide a person to Jannah. And lying leads to disobedience and
disobedience leads a person to hellfire.

Many times people mistake a consequence of behavior as a pattern of behavior. Ibn Qud!mah
mentioned that on the way to $udaybiyyah, the camel of the Prophet ('allall!hualayhi wa
sallam) refused to move, and they said the camel was being disobedient. The Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, The camel did not become disobedient and that is not the
character of Qaswah. The only thing that held it back was what held back the elephant.
Prophet ('allall!hualayhi wa sallam) was referring to the elephant mentioned in Surat-ul-Feel.
Because of one incident one cannot assign a trait to a human being.

What is your defining attribute? How would others describe you? Are you known as an
arrogant person, a hot-tempered person, a generous person or a humble person? As a Muslim
you want to develop good traits and characteristics.

Sometimes when you do a good deed or develop a good characteristic, it is not always for
All!h. Im!m Ibn al-Qayyim said, Whenever a person develops a good characteristic they
dont have to make a good intention every time they act on that characteristic, because they
developed that good habit for the sake of All!h in the first place. All!h still rewards the for
good deed. You dont have to make an intention Oh All!h, this is only for you, and not
because he/she is attractive, etc. every time you help someone.
1.4.2 How far away are you?
4 levels of distance from All!h
1. Simple ignorance (jahl bas#"). He/she is a person who wants to do good, but just doesnt
know any better. Its easy for them to come back to All!h, because they havent
developed any bad characteristics. Once this person becomes Muslims and they receive
dawah, they become better Muslims than anyone else.
2. Compounded ignorance (jahl murakkab). Its someone who is ignorant, but they are not
necessarily evil. They might have consistently been brainwashed. They are being
taught the wrong things. They are weak and go with the flow. The ignorance is being
fed to them. There is an active Shay#!n in their lives, and the wrong guidance can be
from another human being.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

3. The innovator (al-mubtadi). The Shay#!n comes to the person with innovation after
If Shay"!n cant get you to do shirk, then he would rather get you with innovation than
major sin. Shay"!n would rather you commit bidah than commit adultery and interest.
When you commit innovation, you decorate something that is evil and make it look

Im!m al-Sufy!n al-Thawri said, A person with innovation never makes repentance
because he thinks it is good. They do acts that are not from All!h and not from the
Sunnah and think that it is a way of coming closer to All!h. At the same time its
important to not become the bidah police, however. Dont take it to extremes. Not
everything is bidah and not everything is ok. Analyze your actions to see if it is in
accordance with the Qur)!n and Sunnah.

Ibn Mas%d found people in the masjid sitting in a circle and saying tasb#& with stones.
He threw the stones at them and asked them why they were doing this. They said, All
we want to do is good. Ibn Mas%d said, How many people desire good and never
reach it? If you dont desist in this, then you will be the enemies of All!h. The
narrator said that those people were the first to join the Khawarij. Make sure that what
you are doing is proper.

4. Someone bursting in disobedience (Al-Faajir). He is disobedient, satanic, knows he is
doing wrong and he likes it. He is proud of it. He is completely at peace being in at
war with All!h. This person is in the worst situation.

Analyze yourself, which category do you fall in? How far away are you?
1.4.3 The Three Types of Nuf%s
1. Nafsl-baheemah: the soul that commands itself with evil. The more a person obeys their
desires, and abandons worship, the more they become like an animal. The more a person
forbids their desires, restrains their free will, and worships All!h, the more they become like an
angel. All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la) says they are just like the dog with its tongue always out
and panting whether you put something in front of it or not. In fact, they are also worse than
animals, because they are more astray from the straight path. This person sins for the sake of
sinning because of their free will and lack of conscience.
2. Nafsl-laww!mah: the soul that chastises and blames itself. It messes up but blames itself;
first step to getting better. This person holds himself accountable and makes istighf!r and
comes back to All!h.
3. Nafsl-mu#mainnah: The soul that is at peace. This is the soul that has ihsan. When
Y%suf was in the situation with the wife of al-Az#z, All!h says, she wanted him and he
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

wanted her had he not seen the proof of his Lord. But Y%suf said, I would rather be
imprisoned than do this. He loved All!h that much. He completely did away with his desires
for the sake of All!h. He genuinely hates what shes calling him to, because he knows it is
displeasing to All!h and he is at peace with his Lord.

Im!m Ibn al-Qayyim said, Whoever is busy with himself is distracted from others. Whoever
is busy with All!h is distracted from himself. He is so caught up in pleasing All!h that he
forgets his own desires.

When you love All!h, you start to hate things that your soul naturally desires. The soul at
peace wants to please All!h and is tranquil. All!h says in the Qur)!n, O soul at peace, come
back to your Lord, r!(iyatan mar(iyyah (pleasing and pleased). All!h first mentions pleasing,
because for the soul at peace loves All!h so much so that what they really want to hear is that
All!h is pleased with them.

A tabii said, To pray two rak*ahs is more beloved to me than Paradise and everything in it.
His companions said, Why? He said, The two rak*ahs please All!h and Paradise pleases me,
and I would rather please All!h. The goal of tazkiya is ihsan and this tabii has developed such
a relationship with All!h that he is more concerned with what pleases All!h than his own

Suhayb ar-Rumi said, Had he not feared All!h, he would still not disobey Him. Even if there
were no punishment of the hellfire he would still obey All!h, because that was the extent of his
love for All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la).

Shaykh shared a story of a man named, Cory, who came to the masjid to become Muslim after
watching the Deen show. He had never met a Muslim, but he had already downloaded the
iPray app. When asked in a halaqa what he was looking forward to most in Jannah, he
answered, I just want to be able to pray without being bothered. His entire family was non-
Muslim and he was always distracted by noise or other surroundings. When a person really
falls in love with All!h, All!h becomes the hearing with which he hears, the sight by which he
sees, the hand with which he strikes and the foot with which he walks. A person becomes
distracted from the things they naturally desire because they are so overwhelmed by their love
for All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la).

The people of hellfire will ask the angels, Ask your Lord to lighten up our punishment for one
day. They ask the angels to ask All!h, because they had the chance to call upon All!h in this
life but they didnt take advantage of it. They said your lord not my lord, because they
recognized they had come out of the scope of being protected by All!h. They also said lighten
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

up, not finish it; it shows their hopelessness. Im!m al-Ghaz!li said, The greatest punishment
in the Hellfire is the chance that was missed to truly know All!h.
1.4.4 Ba"ar vs. Ba"&rah
Both mean sight. Its the difference between a persons outward sight and insight. The
scholar Ibn Qud!mah said, The body is seen by the ba'ar (eyesight) and the soul is seen by
ba'#rah (insight). Some people just dont have insight, while some people look really deeply
into things; they are awake and aware. Being able to look deeply into self and diagnose self is
really important in order to change.

People who have ba'#rah can even tell certain things about other people. The Prophet
('allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Fear the sight (fir!'ah) of a believer. A righteous
person can diagnose things so well. One time Im!m al-Sh!fii and Im!m M!lik were sitting
and someone walked by. Im!m M!lik says, He is a shepherd. Im!m al-Sh!fii said, I think
he is a carpenter. Someone went to him and asked him his profession and he said, I used to
be a shepherd but now Im a carpenter.
1.4.5 The Himmah Never Dies
Once a person is able to look deeply into self, they will need himmah or ambition. How badly
do you want to change?

Some of the characteristics of himmah are:
1. Al warah (caution). He abandons makrooh as if it is haram. He treats mustahab as fard
for himself. He doesnt make it hard on other people, however. This is a person with
passion and always takes it to the next level. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam)
said, What is permissible has been made clear and what is &ar!m has been made clear
and between them are doubtful matters. Whoever grazes around the doubtful matters
will fall into it.

One of the 'a&!bah said, We left half of the &al!l things out of fear that we would fall
into the &ar!m. A person who has himmah, never indulges in doubtful matters, not
because it conflicts with halal and haraam, but because if something might hurt his deen,
he abandons it. Its always good to avoid doubtful matters, so one cannot fall into

2. Set high standards for yourself. Always look at people higher than you in deen, never
look at people lower than you in deen. Im!m Q!dir al-Jil!ni said, The &asan!t (good
deeds) of normal people are the sayyi!t (bad deeds) of righteous people. For example,
you show up for fajr after a long time and caught the second rak*ah. Another person is
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

always in the first row and never comes later than 30 minutes before 'al!h and if one
day he catches just the first takb#r, he feels terrible because he set his standards high.

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, In everyone of my generation, there
are people who will be in the forefront. And there are also people who go fatwa
shopping. Ask yourself, when you ask for a fatwa, tureedul fatwa wa tureedul taqwa?
(Do you want a fatwa or do you want Taqwa?). A lot of times we know somethings are
not right just from our intuition. Be tough on yourself for yourself.

A man came to Maym%n b. Mahr!n (a tabii) for his daughters hand in marriage, and
he said that he doesnt approve of her for him because she loved clothes and jewelry too
much. The man said he loves those things too, so he then said, Well, now, then I dont
approve of you for her.
Chapter 5: Experiencing Change
1.5.1 A Deep Look at the Tazkiyah of Umar ibn al-Khattab
Umar (ra(yAll!hu anhu) is a great example of an 180 degree change, the most successful
tazkiya experiment. Before Islam, he was someone who used to say that he would beat on his
slaves until he was tired.

When Surah Hujurat was revealed and the ayah about not raising voices over the Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam), Umars (ra(yAll!hu anhu) voice became so low, that Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) had to ask him to repeat himself. He would not raise his voice
above the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) after that. This is the same companion whose
voice was naturally so booming, that once when he was getting his haircut and he something
to his barber and the barber fainted.

Once the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was giving a &alaqah with women. Umar was
walking by the &alaqah and heard the women raising their voices. He walked in and all of the
women ran and hid behind the curtains. Umar said, You enemies of All!h! Come out! You
are not ashamed in front of the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) and you are ashamed in
front of me? The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was laughing. The women said to
Umar, You are harsher and harder. All!h said to the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam),
If you were rough and harsh-hearted, they would have run away from you even if you had the
revelation. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, You are harsh, but I have seen
that when you take a path, the Shay"!n takes another path. He used his toughness in the right
ways and because of that, All!h honored those qualities in him.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

He forced himself to cry. He would never cry in j!hiliyyah. After Islam, he had two black lines
under his eyes because of how much he used to cry. He once walked in on the Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) and Abu Bakr (ra(yAll!hu anhu) after Badr while they were crying
and asked them why they were crying so that he could cry too. He also used to read the ayat of
hellfire every night and cry. He would put his hand next to the fire, and ask, Can you handle
it O Umar? The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, There were people who were
mu&adith%n (people spoken to by the angels) in the nations before me and if there is going to be a
mu&adith in my ummah, it would be Umar.

He remembered his past and constantly humbled himself. He never thought highly of himself.
When the ayahs related to hypocrites were revealed, he would ask, Am I amongst the
hypocrites? He was the secret keeper of the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) and his hero
was Abu Bakr (ra(yAll!hu anhu), asked himself this question. He wanted to be like Abu Bakr
(ra(yAll!hu anhu) in everything and would compete with him. One day he said he was going to
outdo Abu Bakr (ra(yAll!hu anhu) and took half of his money to give in charity, and Abu Bakr
(ra(yAll!hu anhu), not knowing that Umar did this, brought all of his money for charity.

One day during the khal#fah of Abu Bakr (ra(yAll!hu anhu), Umar (ra(yAll!hu anhu) went to the
outskirts of Mad&nah to serve the old women who were there and when he knocked on the first
house, the woman said that someone had already come. Umar asked who it was and she said
she could not tell him, so he waited behind the house and saw Abu Bakr. He said, O Abu Bakr,
I have never traveled a path of good except that you have already traveled it. You have
exhausted everyone who comes after you. He looked at a higher standard and wanted to be
more. There was no else between the Prophet and Umar except Abu Bakr, and he strived to
follow him.

He didnt stop using his traits; rather he used them for a good reason and was sincere. Even
the Qur)!n used to agree with Umar. When you are sincere, All!h grants you deep insight
and understanding. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said to Umar, You are in my
ummah like Musa and Nuh.

We should try to find the characteristics in ourselves that are pleasing to All!h and change
ourselves to be pleasing to Him.
1.5.2 The Concept of True Ladhdhah (Pleasure)
Tasting zauq (the sweetness of your worship).

The average basketball player runs a total of 7 miles per game. Naturally an athlete is not
thrilled about doing that. But what keeps them going? Their enjoyment has passed the
physical exhaustion.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

In terms of salah, All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la) says, And indeed it is something big
(burdensome) except upon the khashieen (those who have that tranquility). Once you taste the
khushu, sweetness, its no longer tough anymore. Keep trying until you taste sweetness, its
smooth sailing after. Dont become complacent. Keep pushing.

VIDEO: Man in old age praying whole night standing on one leg.
1.5.3 Faq&hl-Nafs
This is a concept that is often misunderstood. It means the scholar of the soul. How do you
start to understand your soul the most and become a scholar of your own soul? This is
something very powerful. Im!m al-Ghaz!li gives the example of a calligrapher. Before one
can do his own calligraphy, he copies the same calligraphy over and over and over again, until
he starts to figure it out. This is what well be doing in this class. We will look at what the
sahabah and the tabieen did. What did the best generations do? What is the prescription of the
Qur)!n and Sunnah to cure ourselves of our diseases? In their life stories, we find qualities that
are beloved to All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) and we discover that we can also have similar
qualities. For example Ismail (alayhi sallam) is described in the Qur)!n as forbearing and
tolerant (Kaana ghulamun haleem) while Ishaaq (alayhi sallam), his father, is described as being
very knowledgeable (Kaana ghulamun aleem).

Before you can reach any science, you have to sit and copy someone else over and over again.
Then you start to recognize what is needed for your soul. This doesnt mean you can leave the
Sunnah of the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam). It means you become more aware of your
weaknesses and how to treat them. You start to diagnose your soul. No two people are exactly
the same.

Dont ever think you have arrived! There are subtle diseases that can overtake your heart.
Dont ever think you no longer need tazkiyyat-un-nafs. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam) has also described to us those people who perform the deeds of Paradise until they are
only a handspan away from Paradise and then they do the deeds of the Hellfire and they end up
one of the inhabitants of Hell. Imam Nawawi comments, This person could have either been
insincere in his actions (riya), or he was unaware of his faults.
Unit 2: Making the Change
Chapter 1: Knowledge
2.1.1 The Importance of Seeking Knowledge
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la) says:

Say, Are those who know equal to those who do not know? Only they will remember [who
are] people of understanding. (al-Zumar: 9)

All!h prefers the people of knowledge. All!h also says:

All!h will raise those who have believed among you and those who were given knowledge, by
degrees.(al Muj!dilah:11)

All!h has elevated the people of belief amongst mankind; and amongst the people of belief,
All!h has elevated the people of knowledge degrees above. Ilm directly impacts our spiritual
process and our status in the sight of All!h.

Entire books have been written on this one hadith: Abul-Dard! (ra(yAll!hu anhu) reported that
the Messenger of All!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, He who follows a path in quest of
knowledge, All!h will make the path of Jannah easy to him. The angels lower their wings over
the seeker of knowledge, being pleased with what he does. The inhabitants of the heavens and
the earth, and even the fish in the depth of the oceans, seek forgiveness for him. The
superiority of the learned man over the devout worshipper is like that of the full moon to the
rest of the stars (i.e., in brightness). The learned are the heirs of the Prophets who
bequeath neither d#n!r nor dirham but only that of knowledge; and he who acquires it, has
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September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

in fact acquired an abundant portion. (Abu D!w%d & al-Tirmidhi). One subtle part of this
hadith, who do the angels and various animals make dua for the person of knowledge? The
benefits of the person of knowledge extend to all of the creations. A person of nature is by
nature an environmentalist. He teaches the people and at the same time he is consistently
being beneficial to the animals, to the environment, etc.

True knowledge is knowledge that which benefits. An alim is not simply a person of
knowledge, but rather someone who has a degree of knowledge more than the average
Muslim. There is a direct correlation between the level of knowledge a person has and their
level of khashya. We often forget what knowledge is. We have the overly progressive secular
definition which is a person doesnt know how to read Qur)!n properly but is extremely skilled
in his field and says, Brother, dont you know the first word in Qur)!n is iqra? They are
saying it encompasses all forms of knowledge, not just Islamic knowledge but rather all
knowledge. It is true that Islam encourages knowledge is all fields but to equate knowledge of
shariah and deen to secular sciences is also inappropriate.

When All!h revealed surah Alaq, he mentioned iqra two times in the first five ayahs. The
scholars comment that the first iqra was for knowledge of deen and the second for knowledge
encompasses all other knowledge. When a person acquires knowledge of deen, they naturally
acquire a general sense of purpose, and a general dedication to pursuing knowledge. Knowledge
of the deen did not cause our ummah to go backwards, rather it helped us and the rest of the
whole world to progress. The same scholars of the deen from before are now the fathers of
modern law, fathers of modern medicine and fathers of modern mathematics.

A person who studies medicine and is very conscious of All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la), says
subhanAll!h the entire time during their studies.

Ibn Taymiyyah was the person to write about price floor and price ceilings in Finance. He
would attend weekly lectures in Economics. Al-Qadi Abu Yusuf wrote Kitabul Kharaj, book on
taxation, which many of the modern tax laws come from. Ibn Rushds works are read
frequently in law school. At the end of the day, we cannot equate the two types of knowledge.
First question in the grave will not be about science or math, but will be about your rabb, etc.
First question on Day of Judgment will not be about your degree, but about your prayer.

In Surah Alaq, All!h says, Khalaqal insaana min alaq-he created man from a clot. But the first
step in embryology is nutfah-drop of fluid. The reason alaq is here is because the alaq is the
suspended blood-clot hanging and holding on inside the womb. Without iqra, a person would
fall. We are completely dependent upon the divine revelation and knowledge.

In fact, in times when Islam is under attack, ilm is even more important. If you dont have
knowledge of Islam, and people attack your deen and bring up issues it shakes you, because you
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

dont have the knowledge to refute those misconceptions in yourself. Shay#!n consistently
whispers and because you dont have ilm, you cannot refute misconceptions to not only the
outside world but also to yourself. With ilm, you have stability whenever those attacks come.

Shaykh mentions an example of a brother who became Muslim a few years ago. He was very
knowledgeable in the Bible and Qur)!n, and so whenever he gave talks he could respond right
away. When the issue of Aishas (ra(yAll!hu anha) was brought up by a pastor he asked, How
old was Joseph when he married Mary? Biblically Joseph was 94 years old and Maryam was
14. When a person is ready and equipped, it doesnt spiritually hinder them, nor does it hurt the
deen or dawah. Having firm usool, firm foundation of the deen has a direct impact on your
spirituality. It shows you how to respond to them for the sake of yourself. The virtue of
seeking knowledge is a great virtue in of itself.

Abu Hurayrah (ra(yAll!hu anhu) went out to people and shouted that the inheritance of the
Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was being distributed in the masjid. He told people to
run and get the inheritance. The people all rushed to the masjid. When they got there, they
saw *alaqahs and people reading Qur)!n and people praying. The people came to Abu
Hurayrah and said, All we saw was people reading Qur)!n and other things. Abu Hurayrah
said, This is the inheritance of the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam). It is the inheritance
of all the Prophets and you only inherit from someone whom you are close to.

Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, The virtue of a learned person (!lim) over the
worshipper (!bid) is like my virtue over the lowest one of the ummah.

Knowledge does not stop here. A lot of times people knock on weekend seminars, youtube
videos and lectures for their knowledge. Yes, it does lead some people to dedicate years
studying a subject, but sometimes it leads people to become satisfied with their knowledge and
they become complacent knowing they can ask a shaykh for an answer if they need to.
Knowledge starts with baby steps. Every letter you learn, it increases you in status in the sight
of All!h.
2.1.2 The Intention behind Seeking Knowledge
Abu Hurayrah (ra(yAll!hu anhu) reported that the Messenger of All!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam) said, He who does not acquire knowledge with the sole intention of seeking the
Pleasure of All!h but for worldly gain will not smell the fragrance of Jannah on the Day of
Resurrection. (Abu D!w%d).

Imam Al-Ghaz!li said, We started off seeking knowledge for other than All!h, but knowledge
refused to give itself except for All!h. Imam Al-Ghaz!lis life was one that of soul searching.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Many times there are people who want to start seeking knowledge. Why? Because they want
to speak at conventions, events and be famous. Abdull!h b. Mas%d once told a man, If you
are going to seek knowledge for one of three reasons, then dont seek it. The first one is if you
want to seek knowledge so that you can shame the ignorant, or if you like arguing with the
people of knowledge, or if you are doing it so that you can draw attention to yourself. Dont
abandon seeking knowledge, however, if you find you have the wrong intention. Keep seeking
knowledge and reform your intention. Sometimes people say, Shaykh, I want to go to
Mad&nah or go study because I want to be a big speaker like x or y.

Imam Al-Ghaz!li said there are three types of students of knowledge:
1. Those who seek knowledge with evil intentions from the beginning and they dont even
try to reform it.
2. Those consistently fighting between two intentions; sincerity and insincerity.
3. Those who are seeking purely for the sake of All!h. They constantly fight their
intentions and sincerity never goes. They are the successful ones.

Know why you are seeking knowledge. For every halaqa, every lecture, every video, ask
yourself why are you really doing this. Hassan Al-Basri said, To give knowledge to a person
with wrong intention, is like to giving a weapon to a thief. Al AMash also said, To give
knowledge to a person that doesnt deserve it is like dressing a pig in jewelry.

On a side note, hadith scholars tended to be mean and that was a mercy to the ummah. They
werent easily swayed by the people. They were to the point and strict and one could not play
with their emotions.
2.1.3 The Effort of Seeking Knowledge
Abdullah narrated on the authority of his father Yahya: Knowledge cannot be acquired with

Having the right intention directly affects the effort you will make. Enthusiasm is direct
product of sincerity. We live in a time when teachers feel they are giving izza to the deen and
students think that they are doing the deen a favor. Ilm is so much greater than us and its our
honor to be a part of it.

Ilm is a struggle in of itself. Al-Amash wanted people to work hard for the knowledge. He
had a dog in front of his house and said that if anyone wanted to learn a&ad#th, they had to get
past the dog. He wanted to root out the bad students from the serious students. When the
dog died, he was sad and said, This dog died fisabilill!h. You do have to struggle for the
deen, its not always going to be packaged nicely and handed to you. You dont stop going
because the scholar said something you dont agree with, that shows insincerity.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

AlQadhi Abu Yusuf said, Knowledge will not give it a little bit of it unless you give it your all.
Knowledge requires complete dedication.

Imam Ahmad was such an embodiment of what he taught; you dont see a shred of hypocrisy
in him. Although he was most knowledgeable in his region, he would wrap himself (cover his
face) and go sit in his students halaqa secretly just to keep on learning. He wanted to study
from different scholars who were inferior to him in knowledge. One time Im!m A*mad really
wanted to learn from a scholar in Yemen of the name Abdul- Razz!q al-Sin!ni who was a
famous scholar of *ad&th. Abdul-Razz!q wanted to study with Im!m A*mad, but Im!m
A*mad beat him to it. Im!m A*mad said he was going to go to $ajj and asked to study with
him. Im!m A*mad was too poor to go to $ajj, so he took a job carrying peoples luggage. On
the way to $ajj, he was carrying peoples luggage. He reached $ajj. At that time, it was a
journey requiring months of time. He gets to $ajj and sees Im!m Abdul-Razz!q, and Im!m
Abdul-Razz!q says, May All!h forgive you. I would have come to you. What questions do
you have? He said, I have to come to you in your home and learn from you there. So then
he had to take another job carrying peoples luggage to Yemen to go there. This is all in his
later years of life.

Abdull!h b. +Abb!s became the scholar of this ummah at the age of 13. He loved the Prophet
'allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) and was his shadow. Although he spent less than 3 years with the
Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) he narrated over 1600 ahadiths. He was 10 years old
when he started with the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam), but he was so keen on
following his every move and observing him and learning from him. When the Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) died, Abdull!h b. +Abb!s told his friend, Today all of the
'a&!bah are here, so lets go start seeking knowledge from them. His friend was more
interested in playing with pigeons. Abdull!h b. +Abb!sis left him and wanted nothing to do
with him. He also made it a habit to sleep in front of the doors of the 'a&!bah until they came
out. They would ask him, Why are you doing this? You are the cousin of the Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam). He said, Knowledge does not seek out anyone. If you want
knowledge, you have to seek it. The 'a&!bah would start checking their doors before sleeping
to make sure he was not sleeping there. If you truly want ilm, you will struggle for it.

Today we live in a day and age of degradation of the people of the knowledge. It shows our
lack of value toward ilm that we give ourselves. In the Muslim world, the failures go to college
of Shariah. Its the guy who failed every other test and couldnt make it in anything else. Even
the quality of imams are those that of high school dropouts in many places. You can see them
smoking cigarettes on Mondays and not going to salah, because its their day off. Ilm is
degraded. In Egypt if youre blind, then you become a Qari.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

There is also a back home mentality that persists in America: that imams should be barely
making ends meet and should be biking around house to house teaching kids Qur)!n. We
should of course not be promoting a priest-class; extremes destroy people. But we do need to
show respect to ilm and people of ilm.

Im!m M!lik really held the tradition of Islam in high regard. He was one of the foremost
founders of Ahlul Hadith. Imam Malik didnt always accept student so easily, there was a lot of
red tape one would have to cross to study with him. It wasnt because of arrogance, however.
Im!m M!lik would only walk barefoot in Mad&nah because of his respect to the Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam). When a hadith was mentioned, his face would change colors and
he would go and dress in best way to discuss the ahadith of Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam). He didnt want people to take knowledge with any value or seriousness.

The khal&fah al-H!r%n al-Rash&d sent a messenger to Im!m M!lik (ra*imahull!h) to tell him
that he wants him to come to his house to teach his kids Qur)!n. Im!m M!lik said his children
are like anyone else and need to come to the masjid to learn. The khal&fah sent two bags of
gold with the same message, and he told the messenger to tell the khal&fah that his children
have to come to the masjid because knowledge is that which is sought. Al-H!r%n al-Rash&d
wanted to teach Im!m M!lik a lesson. There was a practice that was established in the later
Umayyad dynasty where the khal&fah would have a high chair during the khu#bah. Al-H!r%n
al-Rash&d was a righteous man and didnt like this practice, but he wanted to remind everyone
he was the khal&fah, so he asked for the chair to be put in the masjid during the khu#bah so that
he could remind Im!m M!lik who the boss is. Im!m M!lik walked in and ignored him and
stood on the minbar and started the khu#bah. He said, In the Name of All!h. Peace and
blessings on the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam). The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam) said, Whoever lowers himself for All!h, All!h will elevate his status, and then he
stepped down. The khal&fah started crying and had the chair taken away.

You are teaching your kids knowledge is weak and invaluable, if you are having someone come
to your house to teach Qur)!n simply out of arrogance. Dont degrade ilm to that level.

When a person truly makes effort, the more that they learn, the more they feel like they dont
know anything. Its viewed as shameful these days to say, I dont know. Im!m al-Shabi, the
teacher of Im!m Abu $an&fah, was once asked a question and he said, I dont know. The man
said, What kind of a scholar are you then? He said, Even the angels said we dont know, so
if they can say this then who am I?

Al-Imam Malik was asked forty questions by someone and to most of them he answered "I
don't know - All!h knows better". The man was surprised that the great Imam Malik didn't
know the answers. Seeing the man surprised, Imam Malik told him that when he goes back to
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

his town, to tell the people that he met and asked al-Imam Malik questions and Imam Malik
said he didn't know the answers.

We should form relationships based on the pursuit of knowledge. Umar says, I used to have
a neighbor from the an"!r who would live in the area of Bani Ummayyah, and we used to take
turns with the *alaqah of the Messenger ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam). My neighbor would
attend one day and I would attend the other day, and we would teach each other what we
learned. You cant make it to every class, but you want others to tell you what they learned.
You want to try to gather as much as you can.

There is an idea outside and inside of the community that knowledge is only for men. People
dont think I want my daughter to be a scholar or !lim. Unfortunately we dont think that
way and we have devalued the concept of women seeking knowledge in our d#n. Some of the
downfall we have in the community today is because we dont have women scholars.

Im!m al-Dhahabi said that from the time of the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) to his
time, he documented 10,000 women scholars of &ad#th. When people ask the question why
dont you have women im!ms? Tell them that we settled that a long time ago. A scholar of
&ad#th has a much higher status than an im!m. The only reason a woman is not imam is
because of the nature of a woman and her hijab, but they occupy positions much greater in our
deen. Im!m al-Dhahabi said, There has never been a weak female narrator of &ad#th. In
ilml-rij!l, there has never been a weak female narrator of &ad#th.

Abu M%sa al-Ashari said, We, the companions of All!hs Messenger, never had difficulty
in understanding a&ad#th except that when we asked (ishah, she knew everything about
it. (ishah was asked by the senior companions about inheritance laws. Urwah b. Zubayr
said, I have heard the speeches of Abu Bakr, Umar, Uthm!n, Ali, and Abu Ubaydah b.
Jurrah and none were as eloquent as (ishah.

Ibn Taymiyyah said, 48% of the fat!wa from the companions came from Umm Salamah. She
was a great scholar and advised the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) in $udaybiyyah.

(ishah (ra(yAll!hu anha) said, The best women are the women of the an'!r because they
didnt allow their sense of modesty to stop them from seeking knowledge. We should teach
our daughter and encourage them to be next scholar of our deen. Raise them with the
intention, My daughter will teach people the deen. A lot of good can come to the deen
through this.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

2.1.4 Being Purified by Knowledge

The Distinction between Ban# Isr!#l and the Ummah of Mu&ammad ('allall!hu alayhi wa

In the Qur)!n in S%ratl-Baqarah, Ibr!h&m (alayhis-sal!m) makes a du! to All!h and says, O
All!h, send amongst them a prophet who will teach them the book and the wisdom and will
purify them through that. Im!m al-Sh!fii said in the Qur)!n, *ikmah means Sunnah. All!h
answered the du! thousands of years later. In S%ratl-Jumuah, All!h says, He is the one sent
amongst the illiterate. A messenger from amongst them who would recite upon them his
verses and purify them thereby and teach them the application of it (*ikmah). All!h put
tazkiyah before application. All!h perfected the du of Ibr!h&m (alayhil-sal!m). After this,
All!h describes how the scholars of the children of Isr!&l were. They were like donkeys
stacking books on top of their backs. They had much knowledge and understanding, but it
was never internalized, so they used their laws for inappropriate reasons. If youre not
purifying yourself with knowledge, it can be dangerous and lead to deviation. The knowledge
did not penetrate the hearts and it became a disease for Ban& Isr!&l . All!h criticized the
practice of Sabbath of Ban& Isr!&l directly. They didnt actually want to do it, so they found a
loophole around it through deviant interpretation. They were able to do this because there
was no tazkiya there. All!h reminds us of this story so we are not like them when orders us to,
O People who Believe! When the call for prayer is given on (Friday) the day of congregation,
rush towards the remembrance of All!h and stop buying and selling; this is better for you if
you understand. When a person has tazkiya, they listen and they obey. This is a distinction
between for Ban& Isr!&l and us, we consistently seek purification through our knowledge.

Abdull!h b. Mubarak said, We rush for ilm, but we dont have the manners for it. A direct
indication of whether or not you seek knowledge for purification is if you are seeking
knowledge that interests you rather that what benefits you, then you are seeking knowledge
for the wrong reasons. If you just like to hear the weird facts and new stories to tell other
people than this knowledge is not purifying. It will have no effect on you and you will forget

This disease will also lead you to asking some weird questions. Im!m al-Shabi was asked the
name of Ibl&ss wife, and he said, I dont know because I wasnt invited to the wedding!
Everyone will get from knowledge what he wants. The reason why we pursue knowledge is
for tazkiyah and not to learn interesting facts. We can ruin our aqeedah like this.

One of reason why we have atheists and agnostics is because we are being raised to be
consumers of everything, including deen in America. This doesnt make sense to me, show
me how this benefits me, I dont care about the deen, ahadith are not real anyways, why
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

did All!h say it like this and not that, etc., these are all indication of a consumer mentality
when it comes to our deen. We can ruin our aqeedah like this. A man came to Imam as-Shafi
and asked, How can All!h punish Iblees with fire when he is made out of fire? Imam hit him
and asked, Did it hurt you? The man replied, Yes. Imam a-Shafai said, But Im made of the
same thing as you are. Dont ask dumb questions. All!h will punish him the way he wants
punish him.

Im!m Abu $an&fah was asked, What do you think about what happened between Ali and
Mu!wiyah? He said, I seriously doubt that on the Day of Judgment that All!h will ask me
about Ali and Mu!wiyah. All!h is going to ask me about Num!n (his name). We should try
to stay away from knowledge that is not beneficial. If you are looking for the juicy stuff, its a
sign that your intentions are wrong.

There is a famous story: Sufy!n b. Uyaynah, a great scholar of *ad&th, once had a student with
him who was following him around and attending his lectures. Sufy!n wanted to know what
he is learning and asked him to share the knowledge. He said, I learned three a*ad&th. I
learned the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) loves sweets and honey. I learned the
Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, If ish! prayer and food coincide, eat first. I
learned that the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, The reward has gone to the
people who have not fasted. (referring to when people are on a journey). Obviously, the man
was hungry and hence focused on these ahadith. What you gather is a direct indication of
what you are on the inside. Whatever you are looking for is what you will find.

Sometimes someone sits in a *alaqah and the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said in an
authentic *ad&th, It may be that the listener of good comprehends it better than the speaker.
Sometimes the person who is listening will catch something that the speaker never understood
or thought about from the *ad&th. Because of the purity of your heart and the purity of your
intellect and what you are looking for, you will turn it into something purifying for you and
understand it and comprehend it even more than the speaker.

The most important function of knowledge is to allow your heart to be enlightened by it.
Im!m M!lik said, Knowledge is not memorizing numerous narrations but is instead a light
that All!h places in the heart of the believer.

Umar b. Abdul-Az&z said, Whoever makes his religion the object of argumentation will
frequently change it. Dont make your religion a religion of argumentation. You can give
na"&*ah, but then move on and dont be a frequent arguer. How many youth you see that go
from hardcore this to hardcore that? One day one is a salafi, calling sufis grave worshippers,
next day one is a sufi, calling salafis wahabis, etc.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Seek that which benefits you and All!h will nahdiyyanna subulana-we will surely guide to Our
path. Always pursue truth and have wisdom to see truth.

Du! of Abul-Dard!:I ask All!h for #m!n that never wears out, for certainty that is truthful, and
for knowledge that is beneficial.

Choosing the Right Scholar

When you want someone to do surgery on your body, you would not just pick anyone. So,
naturally, when it comes to picking someone who is going to have a direct impact on your ilm
and imaan, you want to make sure they are the right person.

Many times nowadays, people like to go with the easiest. We like the scholar that says
everything is halal. But that is not the best for your soul. A person only deludes himself or
herself when they fall into this. Ali (ra'yAll!hu anhu) said, The real faqih is the one who does
not make people despair of All!hs mercy, but at the same time he does not give them
concessions to disobey All!h. How a message is delivered is very important. The deen is easy
by nature, but we should not seek to make it easier than it is.

What to look for in a scholar:
1. Knowledge
Abu Aliyah said, I would study for days to a man to hear knowledge from him, and before I
would start learning from him, I would observe his prayer for days. If he was someone keen to
make sure to pray on time and took time in the motions of prayer, then I would listen to him.
If he was neglectful in his prayer, then I thought he would be neglectful in all other matters

2. Manners and character

Today we have a lot of personality cults. The attitude of the scholars was that they are
human and we are human. If a person wants you to kiss his hands or feet or treat him a certain
way, it contradicts who he is supposed to be in terms of scholarship. Every single sect that we
have in the history of the ummah is the result of a personality that was trying command

If a person says, I am beloved to All!h, then it means he is not. Ali (ra'yAll!hu anhu) said,
All!h has hidden the awliyah amongst his servants. It is a secret relationship some people
have with All!h and He adorns them on the Day of Judgment. None of the four im!ms said
that the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) taught them something in a dream to teach to
others. People who try to claim credentials through miracles or status in society are people
you should avoid.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

If you find a scholar is arrogant, run away. If they try to claim they that they have some special
quality and try to boast about that, that is an indication that they are a liar and should be
avoided. Some ulema will fight you to remove their hands when you try to kiss their hand.
The true ulema dont feel they are worthy of that treatment and they dont put themselves on
pedastools. Our deen does not have a priest class. Whomever calls to himself leave him to

Im!m Layth b. Sad, the teacher of Im!m M!lik, said, Even if I saw a follower of innovation
walking on water, I would reject him. This was reported to Im!m al-Sh!fii who said, He did
not go far enough. Even if he was walking in the air, I still wouldnt accept him.

Abu Bakr al-Ma#%i man said, I sat in the circle of Im!m A*mad for 12 years while he read the
Musnad to his children. I never wrote down a single a*ad&th but looked at his behavior,
character, and etiquettes.

$asan b. Ism!&l said, I heard my father say, There would gather in the circle of A*mad five
thousand people or more. Less than five hundred would write, and the rest would look at his
good manners and behavior. Im!m A*mad would look at the people writing down and say,
Stop writing. Who am I to have my words written down?

Also, when you make a person your deen, and you start seeing the facade of that person, you
may end up leaving the deen yourself. Dont sanctify a scholar and dont disrespect them

3. Correctness

Make sure the scholar references All!h and his Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam)
frequently. They should remind you of the sunnah. Look at their character and how much
they apply the knowledge they are teaching.

Acting upon the Knowledge

The most important aspect of knowledge is purifying yourself. The second part is acting
upon it. Dr Abdur Rahman As-Sumayt was a doctor and daee from Kuwait. He opened
clinics all over East Africa and over 13 million people accepted Islam through him. People of
true knowledge, act upon it. He is a doer. This is one of the most important things because
no matter how much knowledge you have, if you dont benefit yourself and others, then it is
absolutely pointless and you are like a library that has closed down. This is where we find the
difference between people.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Im!m al-Nawawi (ra*imahull!h) wrote Riy!' al-,!li*&n (The Gardens of the Righteous), 40
*ad&th Nawawi, and a shar* on ,a*&* Muslim. When you think of him, you probably think of
an old man. He was arguably the most productive scholar in history, and he died when he
was 36 years old. It is about being a doer and not a talker. It is important to act upon the
knowledge that you have.

Ibn Taymiyyah was given the title Shaykhl-Isl!m by other people. Ibn Taymiyyah was born
into a family of scholars. His father was a scholar, his grandfather A*mad b. Taymiyyah was
a great scholar, and his grandfather was such a great scholar that his son was lost between
the sun and the moon. Ibn Taymiyyah had brothers who were all scholars too. Whenever we
talk about Ibn Taymiyyah, we are only speaking about one man. Im!m al-Dhahabi said,
Im!m Ibn Taymiyyah (Taqiyl-d&n) had a brother names Sharfl-d&n who was more
knowledgeable than him. Why is it that when we say Ibn Taymiyyah we are referring to
Taqiyl-d&n and not his brother? Ibn Taymiyyah was a doer, and he was on the forefront of
dawah. He wrote books. Aq&qatl-wasa#iyyah (The Balanced Creed) is studied over an entire
semester at Mad&nah, and he wrote it in one day. He was on the forefront of everything. The
doer always succeeds.

Practice What You Preach

Do you order righteousness of the people and forget yourselves while you recite the
Scripture? Then will you not reason? (al-Baqarah: 44)

The Messenger of All!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said in a hadith,

"During the night of my ascension, I passed by a group of people. Their lips were being
severed with scissors of fire. I said, O Jibreel,who are these people? He said: "They are
preachers from your ummah that would say other than what they would do."

Al-Kha"#b al-Baghd!di narrated that (ishah (ra'yAll!hu anha) had a young student who
would ask her questions. One day she asked, Son, have you put into practice what you have
learned from me? He said, No, O mother, I have not. She said, Then why are you
increasing All!hs proof against us? Stop increasing All!hs proof against you and me.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Abu Aliyah was a great scholar and would leave if he had more than 4 people in his lecture.
Sufy!n al-Thawri has the title am#rl-mumin#n fil-&ad#th. He wouldnt teach if more than
three people sat with him. In those days, the knowledge still continued because there were so
many other scholars. In these days, we have a shortage, so you should not stop doing but
should keep trying to refine your intention (work on yourself behind the scenes). As long as
you are actively engaged in trying to do what you are saying, then insh!All!h you wont be
held accountable. When you intentionally tell people that which you purposely dont do,
then it becomes a problem. Keep on giving halaqas, keep on spreading knowledge and at the
same time work on yourself.

Dont Preach What You Dont Practice

C you who have belleved, why do you say whaL you do noL

CreaL ls haLred ln Lhe slghL of Allah LhaL you say whaL
you do noL do. (al-Saff: 2-3)

Im!m al-$asan al-Ba"ri was told by the people to give a khu"bah telling people to free their
slaves because too many people in Mad&nah were engaged in the slave trade. He stood up the
next day at the khu"bah and didnt say anything. He did the same the next week. In the third
week, he gave a khu"bah on freeing slaves. Why didnt he talk about it in the previous two
weeks? Im!m al-$asan al-Ba"ri didnt own a slave and was afraid to tell people to free a slave
when he hadnt done so himself. In those two weeks, he took a job and saved enough money
to free a slave.

People will ask, Is knowledge better or worship better? Where is the balance? Im!m al-
$asan al-Ba"ri said, Seek knowledge in a way that doesnt harm your worship, and seek to
worship All!h in a way that does not harm your pursuit of knowledge. Imam Malik said,
No one should isolate themselves in worship (for a long time), until they have studied Islam
for at least 7 years.
2.1.5 The Pursuit that Never Ends: What is the greatest difficulty of
Im!m al-Ghaz!li said there are three difficulties of knowledge:
1. Keeping yourself in the pursuit of knowledge.
2. Acting upon that knowledge.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

3. Being saved and protected from your knowledge. In Spiderman, Dr. Octopus
wanted to create arms to do good, but the arms took over and instead caused harm.
If you use your knowledge for corrupt reasons (i.e. to elevate your status, get more
money), the Prophet ('allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Anyone who seeks
knowledge for something worldly will not even smell the fragrance of Paradise.

From the fitnah of a person of knowledge is that they start to think they are better than other
people. They develop arrogance and pride. They start to develop love for speech and not love
for listening. Knowledge can be bad for a person and can completely destroy a person. You
have to analyze, Is the knowledge Im seeking making me more humble, appreciative or is it
making me look down on people and arrogant?

The pursuit of knowledge has to continue all the time. The more you teach, the more you
have to keep learning.

Imam Muslims death shows the importance of the pursuit of knowledge to scholars. Imam
Muslim was working on revisions of hadith with other imams and he made a mistake for the
first time in his life. He went home to look for the hadith. He was so troubled while looking
for this hadith that he was not eating or drinking. He died neglecting his own body in pursuit
of knowledge. Ilm is an amana and one has to continue developing it. Dont ever think youre
done or that youve arrived.

Im!m Abu $an&fahs two greatest students were al-Q!'i Abu Y%suf and Mu*ammad al-
Shayb!ni. Their status is so high in the $anafi madh-hab that sometimes their opinions
supersede the opinion of Im!m Abu $an&fah. Im!m Abu $an&fah was not a scholar until his
20s. He was a successful merchant and businessman. Im!m al-Shabi saw Im!m Abu $an&fah
in the market and told him that he had the special qualities of honesty and intelligence and
should become a faq#h. Im!m Abu $an&fah would look for people with great qualities and polish
them and turn them into scholars. He saw Abu Y%suf as a child and told his mother that he
had special qualities and wanted to teach him. He said, One day your child will be fed from
the hands of the kings. This is exactly what happened because he had such a high status as a
judge that the khulaf! were after him to serve him.

One day Im!m Abu $an&fah realized that al-Q!(i Abu Y%suf was not in the &alaqah and asked
where he was. He was told that Abu Y%suf started his own circle. Im!m Abu $an&fah wanted
to bring him back to the &alaqah, so he told one of his students to sit in his &alaqah and ask
him, If a person takes his garment to a tailor and pays him to tailor his garment and the
tailor steals the thawb and then later feels bad and returns the thawb, then does the man
demand his money back from the tailor? If he says yes then tell him he is wrong. If he says
no then tell him he is wrong. The student did this, and then Abu Y%suf went to Im!m Abu
$an&fah and Im!m Abu $an&fah started laughing because he knew why he was coming. Im!m
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Abu $an&fah gave a brilliant answer: If the tailor took the thawb and had the intention of
stealing it before doing the job, then he has to give the money back, but if he did the job and
then kept the thawb and felt bad and returned it, then he keeps the money.

Establishing an Environment of Accountability

Everybody needs people to keep them in check. Even the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam) said, My Lord taught me manners. To do that to someone is to put them in check.
All!h held him to a standard and taught the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) good adab.

Use people to create an environment of accountability for yourself. The scholars had the
concept of the muadhdhib, which is a person who will keep you in check. The Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, The believer is the mirror of his brother. What is the
function of a mirror? It exposes to you faults and things that you would otherwise not have
been able to see. When you look in the mirror, things become exposed to you. When the
Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) says this, it means to have people who can expose faults
you would otherwise not have been aware of or recognized. You need people to call you out
and give you advice.

Once Abdull!h Ibn Mas%d was asked to teach about ikhlas (sincerity). He said, It is to accept
the truth from a person when it comes to you whether he be old or young, whether you love
him or hate, you always accept the truth the truth when it comes to you. And whomever
comes lying to you even if that person is close to you and beloved to you, you reject it.

Do not become an unadvisable person. There is a h!adi!th in Bukha!ri from A!ishah: A man came
and sought permission to enter upon the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) and he said, Let
him in, and what a horrible person he is and what a disgrace to his family. The man came in
and he (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) treated him with courtesy. After the man left, A!ishah
asked why he treated him with courtesy, and the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said,
The worst of people are those who people avoid advising and correcting out of fear of being
abused. They know that you have a bad temper and stop giving you advice. The worst people
in the sight of Alla!h are those who dont want to take advice. Many people have established a
reputation of being unadvisable. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) used this as an
example to teach us that people should be comfortable giving you advice. Be willing to accept

Developing the Attitude of a True Student
1. The role of the people of knowledge

Take whats good from the people of knowledge and leave that which is bad. There is
absolutely no reason for a 20 year old to disrespect an 80-year-old scholar, no matter who he
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

is. You must have adab with the people of knowledge. Imam al-Dhahabi said, Whenever
there is a large body of water in fiqh, nothing can ever pollute it. Likewise when we look at
people of scholarship, we dont neglect all of their good because of a few bad things (a lavish or
wild opinion here and there). Dont throw away entire works; rather take the benefit of what
is good in it.

Umar b. Abdul-Az&z was the grandson of Umar b. al-Kha##!b. His father, Abdul-Az&z b.
Marw!n, was appointed the governor of Egypt. Umar b. Abdul-Az&z told his father that he
wanted to stay in Mad&nah with the scholars. The father agreed with the condition that ,!li*
al-Haysan, a great scholar, would watch over him. One day Umar b. Abdul-Az&z came to
'al!tl-fajr after takb#ratl-i&r!m. ,!li* said, I didnt see you before 'al!h, where were you?
He said, I was just combing my hair. ,!li* wrote a letter to his father to tell him that his son
came to 'al!tl-fajr after takb#ratl-i&r!m because he was combing his hair, and his father sent a
letter back along with a barber to shave his sons head.

When Umar b. Abdul-Az&z became the leader, he asked the scholars to hold him accountable
and kept asking for advice. They would sit together for hours and remember death.

Umar b. Abdul-Az&z favorite scholar was the Ubaydull!h b. Abdull!h b. Mas%d. One time
Umar b. Abdul-Az&z went to the door of Ubaydull!h b. Abdull!h b. Mas%d and knocked and
sat for an hour. When Ubaydull!h came out an hour later, Umar b. Abdul-Az&z asked, Why
didnt you come out when I knocked the first time? He told him, I didnt want you to think
that just because you are the khal#fah that you can knock on the door and come in and dont
have to wait. After Ubaydull!h passed away, he said, If Ubaydull!h was still alive, I would
govern all of you while he governs me. Having people of knowledge in your life that can
correct you and advise you and counsel you is extremely important.

2. The company of the

Im!m al-Sh!fii said, I love righteous people even though Im not amongst them, so that
maybe I can gain from them an intercession. I hate the corrupt people although I am amongst
them. Imam al-Ahmad when he read that cried and responded, You love the righteous and
you are amongst them. And from people like you are where we gain knowledge. And you hate
the one who is corrupt and may All!h protect us being amongst the corrupt.

Always be around people who are better than you and your standards will change. Hold
yourself to high standards. Umar b. Al-Kha##!b said, Not a single one of you sees a fault of
mine except that he points it out. After he said this, people started to tell him his faults, and
he loved it. Usually we make friends on the basis of comfort, because they accept us as we are.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

You want friends who just accept you as you are, but you want friends who will make you

Ali b. Abi -!lib said, The worst possible friend a person can have is a person who flatters you
all the time and expects you to flatter them in return. These are not your friends but your
enemies. You want someone who is going to call you out and tell you what you are doing
wrong. These days when we commit sins, we are usually actually congratulated. A friend
posts a picture on Facebook, showing what they should not be showing and is not observing
proper hijab, and we congratulate them by liking it and telling them how good they look.

Abu Bakr and Umar had that special relationship of holding each other responsible. Umar
was a much bigger man than Abu Bakr. Us!mah b. Zayd had been appointed the leader of the
Muslim army by the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) when he was only 17. When
Ras%lull!h died, the people told. Umar to talk to Abu Bakr about Us!mah because they
thought he was too young to lead the army. They waited outside the house of Abu Bakr.
Umar went inside and said, I think he may not be as qualified. Abu Bakr grabbed Umar
from the beard and said, May your mother lose you! You want me to do something different
than what the Prophet ('allall!hualayhi wa sallam) ordered? Umar said, No. Umar went
out and told the people, May all of your mothers lose you! Umar did not think for a moment
that this was person or Abu Bakr was a hater. They had a relationship and when they called
each other out, they knew it was for their own good. Try to find this type of relationship that
will call you out and watch your back; not the one who will make you more comfortable with

3. Consider what your enemies say about you
Sometimes there is truth in what your enemies say, even if it is just a little of it. Consider it
and think over it. A man came to Im!m al-Sh!fii and said, You are a sinner and liar. Im!m
al-Sh!fii said, O All!h, if he is telling the truth, then make him succeed and purify me from
that sin. If he is lying, then forgive him for what he said.

Moreover, if more than one person is saying something about you, then it means that it is
probably true.

4. Learn from the flaws of people around you
When you see someone around committing mistakes frequently, dont use that an opportunity
to look down at them. See what it is that they are doing wrong and commit to yourself to not
fall into the same mistakes. Do the opposite of what they are doing.

Imam Hasan al-Basri was asked, Who taught you good manners? He answered, I just
observed the manners of those around me and did the opposite of what they were doing.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

5. Learn from people of all ages
This is hard for the youth and elders. Old people have a hard time taking advice from young
people, thinking they are being disrespected. While the young people have hard time taking
advice from old people, thinking they are irrelevant and foolish. Ibr!h&ms father did not to his
son. And many old people dont listen to younger ones, because, they dont know what
theyre talking about anyways.

Im!m al-Muzani said, In the past, when the older people would see the younger people, they
would say, I need to learn from him because I preceded him in bad deeds. When the younger
people would see the older people, they would say, I need to learn from him because he has
preceded me in good. Everyone was trying to learn from everyone. This is really powerful.
The elder is thinking, He lived longer than me and did more good than me, while the elder is
thinking He lived longer than me and is still pure, let me learn from him.

Ima!m ash-Sha!fii was teaching the fiqh of fasting in Madi!nah in the masjid of the Prophet
(s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) while he was drinking water and not fasting. People were
wondering why their shaykh was eating and drinking while teaching the fiqh of fasting and
asked him. He said, I have not reached the age of puberty. Someone asked, How old are you?
He said, Mind your own business. The man said, Why did you say that? He said, I asked
Ima!m Ma!lik this question and he told me this answer.

The elders should learn from the youth, and the youth should never feel too arrogant to learn
from those who are older. A sign of ego is when you have a problem learning from someone
younger than you. Advice to the young ones: accompany older people and you will become
mature at a very young age. Their experience and wisdom will rub off.

6. Your family members.
This is probably the most significant. Nobody after Alla!h knows you better than your family, so
you need to make sure that you ask them for advice and seek advice from them. No one sees
your lack of character or greatness of character more than your family. One of the fallacies
with great men and great women is that they have demons in their closet, which come out
later in life. The people inside the household have a totally different tale than everyone else.
One of the beauties of the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) is that the more you know him,
the more you love him. Anas said, He was the best person of character. He knew him better
than others. The wives of the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) had nothing but beautiful
things to say about him. When Umm Salamah when heard the h!adi!th the best amongst you is
he who is the best to his family, she would say, You have told the truth, Rasu!lulla!h (s!allalla!hu
alayhi wa sallam). The companions would compete for his love.

No one knows you better than those who you are exposed to for the most amount of time. Seek
nas!i!h!ah from your husband/wife. Establish the environment of accountability in the home. If
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

your parents think you are rotten person, then it does not matter how great everyone else
thinks you are. If your spouse thinks you are monster, but people on the outside think you are
a great person, its an indication of messed up you are on the inside. Rasu!lulla!h (s!allalla!hu
alayhi wa sallam) said, May Alla!h have mercy on a man who wakes up in the middle of the
night and wakes his wife up, and if she refuses, he sprinkles water on her face. May Alla!h have
mercy on a woman who wakes up in the middle of the night to pray and wakes her husband up,
and if he refuses, she sprinkles some water on his face. It is an environment of holding each
other accountable. Create this environment in the home.

Consider yourself a business, and you are marketing yourself to Alla!h (subh!a!nahu wa taa!la).
You are trying to seek the Face of Alla!h. As a business, when someone posts reviews, which
customers do you look at most? The most frequent buyers. Make sure those who are most
exposed to you are satisfied most. The closer people are to you, the more they should see your
goodness. You can learn a lot about yourself, just by asking your family.

Also if your product is flawed, it doesnt matter what your customers think. At the same time,
know that none of the advice you receive from people can replace your own tazkiyatl-nafs and
chastisement of yourself.

7. People above you and below you
There are some people that can give you true advice even though they might be terrible people
or less than you in deen.

A saying: To hold a grudge is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.
When you hold a grudge, you have allowed the person trying to make you angry happy
because they know that they have been able to hurt you.

Sufya!n al-Thawri said, We loved a people from whom it was said to us fear Alla!h. Nowadays
people are annoyed and feel insulted when they hear this.

Abu Hurayrah was once guarding some of the charity. He caught a man taking from charity.
The man said he is poor and needs to take care of his family. Abu Hurayrah let him go. He told
the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) what happened, and the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa
sallam) said the man lied and will be back. The next day, the same thing happened and Abu
Hurayrah let him go. He told the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) what happened, and the
Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said the man lied and will be back. The third time, Abu
Hurayrah said he was going to take the man to the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam), and
the man said, Let me teach you something to protect your money. He taught him a!yatl-kursi.
The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam), That was Shayt!a!n. He told the truth even though
he was a liar. If Abu Hurayrah can learn from Shayt!a!n, then you can learn from anyone. Learn
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

to be a student of knowledge, observe and find ways to benefit from all those around you, even
if they are a terrible person.

Heed lessons from everyone. Ask the people around you to keep you in check. The worst thing to
do when someone gives you advice is to then ask them if you can give them advice. If someone
gives you advice, then in that same sitting, do not give them back advice because your ego may
have been bruised.

Seek advice and take it. Dont respond to it. Thank the person for giving you advice. It is good
for you to keep on seeking advice from people.
Chapter 2: Minding Your Own Business
2.2.1 For your own good

O you, who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin.
And do not spy or backbite each other. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his brother
when dead? You would detest it. And fear All!h; indeed, All!h is Accepting of repentance and
Merciful. (al-$ujur!t: 12).

All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la) is telling us to avoid suspicion and to mind our own business.
Suspicion causes one to start spying and backbiting about that which does not concern. It
makes us curious and look for more details. It starts from suspicion and with a person who
does not know how to mind his own business.

Rasullulah ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Part of someone being a good Muslim is his
leaving alone that which does not concern him. (al-Tirmidhi). Remember that when you point
a finger at someone, there are 3 fingers pointing back at you.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Im!m al-Sh!fii said, Do not allow your tongue to mention the faults of other people because
you are covered in faults and other people have tongues too. If you fall upon something
displeasing of your brother, then conceal it and tell your eye that other people have eyes too.
Its really for your own good. We live in the era of social media and it is absolutely destructive
where we spend hours of our day minding other peoples business. It is truly destructive for
your soul and it lead to leads to gossip and other sins. Mind your own business!

Abdull!h Ibn Mas%d one time came across a man who smelled like alcohol. Someone asked
him, Arent you going to take care of him? He replied, Its none of my business. I didnt see
him drinking.
Im!m al-$asan al-Ba"ri said, One of the signs that All!h has abandoned you is when he busies
himself with what does not concern him. Also Im!m Ibn al-Qayyim said, Whoever is busy
with himself is distracted from others. Whoever is busy with All!h is distracted from
himself. For your own good, for your own productivity, do not allow yourself to be a gossip
king or queen and do not become a monitor for watching others. Monitor yourself and tell
other people that you need their help.

Umar b. al-Kha##!b was on his night patrol. He would take rice and wheat to distribute to the
poor. One night Abdull!h b. Mas%d was with him, and they heard music in someones house.
Umar peeked over the wall and saw an old man with a woman who should not be there, and
she was singing to him. Umar b. al-Kha##!b said, O old man, shouldnt you be waiting for
your death? Fear All!h! The old man responded, You fear All!h! You have violated my
rights by spying on me. Umar b. al-Kha##!b started crying and went to Abdull!h b. Mas%d
who asked him what was wrong. Umar b. al-Kha##!b didnt say anything and was so afraid
that he had violated someones rights. Later, he saw the old man in a gathering and whispered
in his ear, I just wanted to tell you that by All!h, I have never told anyone about this in my
life, even Abdull!h b. Mas%d who was with me. The man whispered back, By All!h, I have
not committed those sins since that night.

Don't get yourself in trouble by following other people. If you see someone doing something
they shouldnt be, make excuses for them.
2.2.2 For the good of your brother
Do not support your brothers devil against him. How many youth stop coming to the masjid,
because they feel like they are being judged?
2.2.3 Giving the benefit of the doubt
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Give the person the benefit of the doubt. Give him 70 excuses, and if you cannot think of
excuses, then think that he has an excuse which you cant think of and dont know about. Mind
your own business and move on.

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, He who sees something which should be kept
hidden and concealed will be on the Day of Judgment like the one who brought a dead girl
buried alive back to life. This is because you have saved the persons reputation.

Dont hate the sinner because he sins different from you. We all have sins and we should
never try to justify or make ourselves feel better by pointing out other peoples sins. A sister
who has issues praying should not point out a sister who has troubles with hijab to make
herself seem better. Weve got our own issues and faults to worry about, no need to look

Imam Sufyan at-Thawri said, May All!h have mercy on the person whose own faults made
him too busy to be concerned with the faults of other people.

Cover the other person. When you cover someone, you hide their faults and beautify them.
The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Whoever covers the believer, All!h will cover
him on the Day of Judgment. All!h will conceal your faults on the Day of Judgment.

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Whoever follows the awrah of his brother,
All!h will expose him even if he is in the middle of his home. Im!m al-Qisai forgot S%ratl-
K!fir%n while reciting, and a man by the name of al-Yaz&di stood up and started to humiliate
him. In the next "al!h, al-Yaz&di stood to lead "al!h and could not get past al&amdulill!hi
rabbil *!lam#n. Makes sure your intentions are sincere when you advise someone. You want
to elevate them not humiliate them.

As a daiee, if you see something wrong and you see someone mess up, you go to them caring
for them. Say, Look I love you, I care about you. I havent told about this to anyone. I just
wanted to help you out. Is there any way I can help? If they see your sincere will, inshaAll!h
they will change as result of that. While some people know that they are doing wrong, they
will feel uncomfortable knowing others know. At the least, they will appreciate you keeping it
to yourself and not gossiping about it. You cover them and beautify them.

You should also always give nasihah on the side when you come across something. Dont ever
go searching for other peoples mistakes and dont ever publicize them either. Imagine how
much time is wasted following people on Facebook and social media, finding things out about
people you shouldnt really know about. Time that that you could have spent on bettering
yourself. Dont obsess yourself with other peoples problems and faults.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

If someone happens to be constantly criticizing you, dont take it personally. If they are just
trying to hurt you, take it with a grain of salt. Swallow it and just let it go. If you go and seek
to get them back, however, it shows you have a ego issue. If this happens in the public eyes and
involves your deen or society, however, you have to defend yourself. Make sure you are
standing up for the deen of All!h, however and not just your ego. In this society, one must
learn to grow a thick skin, especially in our communities where we have a chronic disorder of
criticizing people.
Chapter 3: Treating Destructive Flaws
Everything must be treated with its opposite.

You treat extremes with extremes. If a person is at a point where they cannot control
themselves and gradually disengage themselves, then they have to disengage from it rapidly.
Abdus Salam Rahimullah said, All!h always treats extremes with extremes until everything
comes to the middle.

Prophet (S.A.W) used to prohibit visiting the grave, because people had an addiction to
worshipping the grave. It was reversed once they were firm on their aqeedah.

Always consider the disease worse than its expression. Usually when you are trying to
emphasize something the expression used is almost always more extreme that what you are
actually trying to express (ex: the heat is killing me). But when All!h uses an expression it
does not match the severity of that sin. Because you are sinning against a Lord that is Rahim
and he is your own creator.

Prevention vs. Restoration
An ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure.
If you go through the list of character flaws mentioned in this class and realize you dont have
these problems of riya, pride, lying, backbiting, etc. and know how to protect yourself from
them, it will be much easier for you to avoid those sins than someone who is already deeply
indulged in them.
2.3.1 Curing Bad Character
Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) summarized his mission by saying, I was only sent to
perfect good character. What got Shay#!n out of Jannah and to be forever cursed was not lack
of worship, but rather a character flaw.

The Messenger of All!h (SallAll!hu ALaihi Wasallam) was seated in a gathering with the
Sahabah when he looked towards the entrance and said, A man of Paradise is coming. At that
instance someone who seemed to be very ordinary entered the mosque where they were seated.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

A Sahabi was curious as to why the Prophet said this, so he followed the man to his house. This
Sahabi told the man that he was a traveler and stayed as a guest. For three days the Sahabi saw
nothing unusual, so he finally told the man what the Prophet had said and asked him what was
so special. The man thought for a long time and said, There might be one thing before
going to sleep every night I forgive everyone and sleep with a clean heart." Good character
with minimum worship allows a person to attain a place that Shay#!n lost after thousands of
years of worship because of a character flaw. Character is that important.

Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, A person will exceed the level of one who is
always fasting and praying Qiyam through good character. Good character is something we
can ascend with. When we dont have good character we could be destroying ourselves even
when we have many acts of worship; they can all be a deception. Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi
wa sallam) said, There is nothing heavier on the scale on the day of judgement than khuluq.
Khuluq is internal beauty.

Dua of Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam): Al l !humma kama hassanta khal qi
fahassin khul uqi . O All!h, the way you have beautified my outside beautify my inside
(internal image).

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was told about a woman who fasted much, prayed
much, and gave charity much but abused her neighbors. The 'a&!bah asked about her status,
and the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, La khayra fiha. There is no good inside of
her. She is in Hellfire. There was no beauty inside of her.

Im!m Ibn Qayyim says, The soul is much more in need of beautification than the body.
All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la) says, I am creating this human being from clay. I created him and
breathed in him from My Spirit. Make prostration towards him. An academic said this means
that we all have All!h inside of us, but this is not what it means. This is All!h (sub&!nahu wa
ta!la) venerating and honoring the soul. Ibn Qud!mah said, All!h did not command the
angels to prostrate towards (dam until the soul was there. This is the same thing when we
say the Kabah is baytull!h. It is All!hs way of venerating the Kabah. All!h is venerating the
soul. Truly beauty is on the inside. Inner beauty is true beauty. The khalq (exterior) is

Many people think character is not changeable. Ras%lull!h ('allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said,
Verily, knowledge is through seeking it, and forbearance is through learning it. To get
knowledge, you go and study. The same way that you learn knowledge is the same way you
gain good character; by practice. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Whoever
seeks good will be given good (will achieve it), and whoever seeks to avoid evil will be
protected from it. When you try to attain a good character, All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la)
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

makes it attainable. Anger is one of the hardest characteristics to change. But it can be done
through practice and anger management. Every characteristic is the same way.

With good character, intention still counts. If you are pretending to have good character so
that people think a certain way of you, you will not be rewarded for it. The Prophet ('allall!hu
alayhi wa sallam) said, A person who tries to show something that is not truly of him is like
the one who is wearing two garments of falsehood. For example, if you are getting in an
argument and say, May All!h forgive you, brother because you want people to think you are
humble and your intention is that people will say good things about you, then it doesnt count.
If you are trying to practice a good quality, then that is fine because that it is still for All!hs
sake. To do something trying to show off (riyah), however, can be really destructive.
2.3.2 Backbiting / al-Gh&bah
Umar Ibnl-Kha##!b came upon Ab% Bakr al-,idd&q pulling his tongue. Umar said to
him, Stop, may All!h forgive you! Ab% Bakr replied, This tongue has brought me to
dangerous places.

Umar Ibnl-Kha##!b !"# ! !"# said:Whoever speaks a lot will make many mistakes and
whoever makes mistakes will commit many sins and whoever commits many sins will find that
the Hellfire is his dwelling place.

The Prophet ('allall!hualayhi wa sallam) said, "When the son of Adam gets up in the morning,
all of the organs of his body submit to his tongue and say: 'Fear All!h with us for our condition
is according to you. If you are good, we will be good; and if you are bad, we will become
bad."'[At- Tirmidhi]. If a person has a dirty heart, they will have dirty tongue. A plate of
food is your heart and the spoonful is your tongue. Its a direct indication of internal
nastiness when a person says things that are wrong.

We have many different tongues today, unfortunately. Abul-Dard! said, All!h gave you two
ears and only one tongue, so use them with their due proportion. But now our iPhone is a
tongue, our laptop is a tongue, etc. Also our Facebook, twitter and emails are also tongues.
There are so many ways express to ourselves now and theyre all our tongue. We are now
constantly busy talking at people and not really listening anymore. We dont use our ears and
tongue in proportion.

Even our gestures have words. Aisha once made a gesture to indicate that Umm al-
Mumineen Safiyyah was short. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, You have said
a word that if you were to spit it in the ocean it would pollute the entire ocean.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, "Whoever guarantees me (the chastity of)
what is between his legs (i.e. his private parts), and what is between his jaws (i.e., his
tongue), I guarantee him Paradise." If speaking is silver, then silence is gold.

All!h gives us that preventative measure. All!h says, Certainly will, the believers have
succeeded: They who are during their prayer humbly submissive and they who turn away from
idle speech in Suratul Muminoon (1-3). Idle speech is neutral, but if youre consistent with it,
you're bound to fall into all of the other things (backbiting, slandering, lying, etc.).

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Whoever believes in All!h and the last day, let
him speak well or keep silent. Silence is truly golden. If you speak too much, you will mess
up. Imam al-Hasan Basri said, The heart of the believer is in front of his tongue. Before he
speaks, he considers whether or not this is good for him. Tongue of the hypocrite is in front of
his heart, the tongue speaks and then he considers whether or not it was right or wrong.
Consider what you say and write before doing so.

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) would never speak until the other person would
finish. It was from his khuluq. He would never cut off anyone and let the other person talk.
Doing this gives you a chance to consider or not you should say what youre about say.

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was asked what are the things that enter a person
into Jannah most. He replied, Fear of All!h and good character. And as for things that enter
a person into hellfire most he said, the private part and the tongue. Mu!dh asked the
Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam), Will we even be punished for the things that we say?
He ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam), Nothing causes a person to fall on his face in Hellfire more
than the harvest of the tongue. It is a matter of just saying one thing.

Silence strengthens your determination. There are talker and doers. Hold yourself online and
in gatherings. Dont comment on everything. Dont post whatever you feel like posting.
Dont send text message whenever you feel like it. Silence is always good for you. Youre
taking a risk every time you open your mouth.

Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Verily the most beloved of you and the closest
of you to me in the hereafter is the one with the best manners, and, the most hated of you to
me in the hereafter is ath-tharthaaroon al- mutafayhiqoon al-mutashaddiqoon.
Ath-Tharthaaroon Someone who talks about any and everything. He always has an
opinion on everything. He just has to talk.
Al-Mutashaddiqoon Literally this means someone who rhymes excessively to impress
people. Today, they would be those people who use big words to try to impress another
person. The halal wine & cheese people, someone purposely showing off and is looking to be
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Al-Mutafayhiqoon Someone who speaks condescendingly, speaks down to people. There
is a difference between internal arrogance and speaking condescendingly. However, it is
usually a very good sign of arrogance.

Luqman the Wise was ordered by his master to bring the best part of the lamb for him.
Luqman returned with the tongue. His master asked him, the next day, to bring the worst part
of lamb. Again, Luqman returned with the tongue. The master then inquired how the same
organ could be both the best and worst at the same time. Luqman replied that if you use the
tongue for good things it is the best part of your body. If, on the other hand, it is used in the
wrong way, it can become your worst enemy. It is therefore, either the best part of your body
or the worst part. Everything is either for you or against you.

All!h did not create anything without a purpose. Al-$asan al-Ba"ri said, All!h has created
two gates for the tongue: your teeth and lips. Learn to use your gates properly. Your lips
and teeth are a prison, so leave your tongue in prison sometimes. When a person is silent
that allows them more chances to do good.

Video on backbiting:

One way to avoid backbiting is to have a wird of istighfaar. It can be something from sunnah
like azkaar, etc, to keep tongue busy with good things.

O you, who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin.
And do not spy or backbite each other. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his brother
when dead? You would detest it. And fear Alla!h; indeed, Alla!h is Accepting of repentance and
Merciful. (al-H!ujura!t: 12)

Amr ibn al-Aas was walking with some of his companions when they passed by a rotting
carcass of a dead mule. He then said to his companions, By All!h, it would be better for a man
to eat his fill from the meat of this than from the flesh of his fellow Muslims.

Rasu!lulla!h (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) asked the companions, Do you know what backbiting
is? They said, Alla!h and His Messenger know best. Backbiting implies talking about your
brother in a manner he does not like. If what you said about him is true, then it is ghi!bah, and if
what you said is not true, then it is nami!mah (slander).

Gheebah is linguistically from ghayb, which means the unseen; someone that is absent. All!h
(sub&!nahu wa ta!la) says, Would any one of you like to eat the dead flesh of his brother?
Why does All!h use the word dead? Because the person is dead and hence helpless and unable
to defend himself. Also if you were to eat the flesh of a dead person, who is getting hurt? You.
You are the one hurting yourself.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

The implication of gheebah are very severe. It can be carried out through gesture and listening

Rasu!lulla!h (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, A Muslim is the brother of a Muslim. He
neither oppresses him nor betrays him nor looks down upon him Backbiting falls into all of
these categories. Oppression and belittling are actually forms of backbiting and betrayal is
where you allow others to backbite your brothers or sisters and you do not say anything about
it. Listening to backbiting is therefore, just as bad as backbiting itself. By listening to others
you are simply a silent devil. You are giving your implicit approval to them.

Im!m Ibn al-Qayyim said you will be punished two times on the Day of Judgment for
instigating backbiting. Once for instigating it and the other for causing others to fall into the

Also in another hadith reported by Imam Abu-Dawud, that the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa
sallam) said, "When I was ascended up (Miraj), I passed by some people with copper nails, scratching
their faces and chests. Then I asked Jibreel, who are these people? He then answered, "Those are the ones
who eat peoples flesh (Backbite people) and are accusing people by talking bad about them." What is
the relationship between backbiting and scratching our own face over and over again? By
doing gh&bah in this world we are essentially harming or shaming the face of a person in
society. A just recompense for that will be we will be forced to rip and tear our own physical

Someone came to the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) and showed the Prophet two
women who were fasting and said that they were dying of thirst. The Prophet (s!allalla!hu
alayhi wa sallam) turned away silently refusing to give permission for them to break their
fast. So, the man begged him again, mentioning that the women were on the verge of death.
The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) then said, bring them to me and bring along a bowl.
When they turned to him, he (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) turned to one and told her to vomit
in the bowl. She complied, spitting up a mixture of vomit, blood, pus and pieces of flesh which
half-filled the bowl. He (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) then turned to the other and had her do
the same. After the bowl was filled, he said, Verily these two have fasted from what All!h has
made $al!l for them and broken their fast from what All!h has made $ar!m. They spent their
fast eating the flesh of others.

If we are involved in backbiting in any manner, even if it be passive, we need to work to
change the situation. Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said,Whosever of you sees an
evil, let him change it with his hand; and if he is not able to do so, then [let him change it]
with his tongue; and if he is not able to do so, then with his heart and that is the weakest of
faith. If people are backbiting and you dont have the courage to say anything then leave,
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

this is the least you can do. Dont just sit there in a way that gives implicit approval.
Otherwise you are not even fulfilling the condition of disliking it in your heart.

The causes of gh#bah are usually present in out insecurities about ourselves. Prophet
(s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) Whoever please people at the expense of the anger of All!h,
All!h will hate and will cause the people to hate him too. Eventually a gossiper is not liked
by anybody, because it starts off with one person but eventually they gossip about everyone.
He also continues, Whoever pleases All!h at the expense of his popularity, All!h will be
pleased with him and will cause the people to love him too.

People will remind you of your own sins and shaytan will try to hold you back when you try to
stop backbiting and other sins. People dont like to be told they are wrong. If anyone claims
they would say the same bad things to the persons face, it just means they are rude. But
backbiting is still wrong and you need to take the first step. Eventually people will start to
like you and appreciate you when they understand that you are a person of trust. Some people
backbite out of complacency, some out of anger, some to make others laugh but it is extremely
important that we diagnose the cause of our backbiting and address them.

Victims of backbiting

Abdur Rahman ibn Mahdi said, I dislike people to disobey All!h, otherwise I would wish that
everyone in this world would backbite me. There is no equal joy to find a good deed on your
scale on the Day of Judgment you did not even know about or even had.

Abdull!h the son of Im!m Ahmad said that once a man came to his father and said, Oh Ab%
Abdillah, I have backbitten you, so please forgive me. Im!m Ahmad said to the man, You are
forgiven if you do not do it again. As a Daaee, Im!m Ahmad wanted to not only forgive the
man but to remind him that he should never commit this sin again.

There are three conditions generally for tawbah, but there is an additional condition when it
comes to repenting from backbiting. Feeling guilty for the sin, seeking forgiveness, dont
return to seek, and fourth being if you have harmed a person, seek forgiveness from them and
returning their rights to them. We need forgiveness from both the person we have harmed and
from All!h.

Some people came to Im!m Ibn Sireen, and confessed that they had backbitten against him and
asked for his forgiveness. He replied, As for me, I have forgiven you, but, I cannot make lawful
what All!h has made unlawful. We should therefore remind those who backbite that they are
infringing on the rights of the people and also the rights of All!h. Forgiveness therefore needs
to be sought from both the people and from All!h.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

How do you seek forgiveness from someone after you have backbitten about him? Won't it be
counterproductive? If its a person that you think will understand and by approaching those
things will get better then tell them. But in reality, the best way to undo the harm youve
caused is to say good things about the person in front of the same people you have bad things
about them to. Restore their face just as you destroyed it. This is far more critical than asking
them for their forgiveness. Let them know that you had previously lied and speak well of the

Al-$asan al-Ba"ri and Sufy!n al-Thawri were peers and they had a way of dealing with those
who had backbitten them. If they ever heard of anyone backbiting them, they would send a
basket of fruits to those people and write, I heard that you were giving me your good deeds
and this was the only thing I can find to repay you with, so please accept it. If you are a victim
of backbiting then rejoice, those are your good deeds. If you are guilty then think of the

If you have been backbiting people for a long time then send out a mass email, text, status
update or call people and say, Look I used to backbite a lot and I just want to make sure that
all of you forgive me. If Ive ever backbitten about you, please forgive me. Try to make
things better, seek All!hs forgiveness and purify yourself. Backbiting usually starts with
keeping the wrong friends around. You will backbite if you are consistently surrounded by
people who backbite. Dont spend time around unless you can actually tell them to stop.

When does backbiting become permissible?
1. Complaining about oppression or injustice to someone who can help
If you need to complain to the im!m or a friend who can help, then it is fine to backbite.
What about talking about a ruler? The rulers are doing their actions in public and are
open transgressors. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Do not forbid people
for speaking ill of the f!jir (person who disobeys All!h).
2. Seeking the help from someone to correct something wrong
3. Asking for a fatwa- its khiyaanah if you don't tell
4. Warning a person at risk of harm
If you know someone is a bad businessman, its betrayal when you dont tell the person
entering in a business with him about it. Similarly in marriage.
5. When someone has a title that has a bad meaning but the person is known by it.
Al-Amash means the one who is blind. This was a name he called himself. This is very
rare. Make sure if a person has a nickname with a bad meaning that he is seriously okay
with it being used and was not bullied into it.
6. Speaking about a proud sinner- zikrul faajir. This refers to someone who publicly disobeys
All!h and is proud of it.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

CAUTION: These are all exceptions to the prohibition of backbiting, however, if your desire to
commit gh&bah is really strong, you will find a way to make it fall under one of these
exceptions. But, know that you are not fooling anyone, but your own self.

PRACTICAL TIP: Anytime youre going to apply an exception, make sure you ask a person of
knowledge that it is permissible and that you don't fall into something severe. Anytime you
backbite you are putting your imaan at risk. Say only what needs to be said and move on.

2.3.3 Slander / al-Nam&mah (Tale-Carrying)

All!h says in S%ratl-$ujur!t, If someone comes to you with nab! (news), then verify it.
Nab! in the Arabic language is different from khabr. In English, they are both news. Nab! is
news that requires your response. Khabr is all news. All!h says, If nab! comes to you, then
verify it. If any other news comes to you that doesnt pertain to you, then you ignore it. If it
has nothing to do with you, then it is not your business. This is for your own good because
Khabr can waste your time and efforts. It leads to backbiting and other things.

There are two categories of nam#mah: saying something about someone that is untrue or
coming to someone and saying so and so said this about you (starting enmity between
people). The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, He who starts enmity between
people by quoting their words to each other will not enter Paradise (even if they are true

Slandering can be even from just hinting. When Safwan appeared, leading Aisha on the
camel, Abdull!h ibn Ubai ibn Salul did not directly accuse them of adultery. All he did was
say, By All!h, he was not safe from her, nor, was she safe from him. This was all he said.
After that, people started talking. These few words caused so much distress to the
Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) and his family. All!h therefore, condemned those
who passed the slander and those who did not stop the slander when it came to them. All!h
says in Suratun-Noor Why - when you (O believers) heard of it - did the believing men and
the believing women not think well about their own selves, and (why did they not) say, This
is a manifest lie. Why did they (the accusers) not bring four witnesses to prove this?...(12-

Once a woman was giving the ghusl of a dead woman, and she said, Wall!hi, these private
parts were dirty and involved with many men. Her hand became stuck to the body. People
were going around asking imams what to do. Im!m M!lik said, Lash her with the
punishment of slandering a chaste woman. When she was lashed, her hand came loose
from the body. Then the people started to say, No one should give fatwa while Im!m M!lik
is alive in Mad&nah. Sometimes we go as far as to slander dead people. But what guarantees
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

your forgiveness when you slander dead people. Are you going to be able to ask them for

Note: be especially careful of not backbiting a righteous person. This is another level. The
scholars said, The flesh of the righteous is poison. It is worse because All!h (sub&!nahu wa
ta!la) says in a &ad#th qudsi: Whoever takes a close friend of Mine as an enemy, then I have
waged war against him. It is worse if you speak ill of a righteous person. You dont know if
a person is righteous or not. You may be escalating to another level without realizing it.

Whenever you spread news about people and stir up enmity, you are Shayt!a!ns mailman. Ali b.
Abi T!a!lib said, The person who spreads nami!mah (the namma!m) will cause in an hour the
fitnah of months. By telling your friend what someone else said about him, are you really
doing him any good. No youre being a nammah. Dont go to people and quote them to each

Ima!m al-H!asan al-Bas!ri said,Whoever says to you someone said such and such about you,
then know that he goes to another person and says that you said such and such about him.

Six things Imam Qudamah said to do if someone comes to you saying: He said this
about you!
1. Dont believe him.
Dont entertain what they said and think of it as a lie. You are not allowed to believe
this person.
2. Advise him to stop. STOP!
Tell them you are not comfortable with this. You have to inform and remind this
person that he is not allowed to do this. This is forbidden.
3. Show anger with him.
You should show anger in your attitude and facial expression.
4. Dont think ill of the accused.
Dont think, Well, what if they really did say that? Dont let this persons statement
penetrate into you in any way whatsoever.
5. Dont start spying to find out if what was said was true. Not worth it.
You are not allowed to go to the first person and find out if he really said such and such
about you and you are not allowed to ask others who was in his gathering either.
6. Dont pass the slander. Don't become a part of the satanic train. A tale-carrier will
never enter Paradise. (al-Bukha!ri & Muslim)

Our Muslim community has become like Fox news. A guy is seen in a mall with a girl and next
thing we know everything is blown out of proportion. After a meeting we go and tell so and so
this person said this about you in a board meeting/halaqa/conference meeting. We
consistently divide and destroy communities through namimah. How do you face All!h
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

subhanAll!h wa ta'ala with that sin? You did not allow people to live in peace. Why Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) did not specify the punishment for nameemah like gheebah. He
just said, they dont go to Jannah. Because the man did not allow people to live in peace so he
all will not be allowed to live in darussalam-the home of peace. He kept a community out of

Question: Is it ghiba to make fun of how someone speaks?
A: Yes. Sometimes we think that if we are doing it in a religious context, we think its okay.
No, its not.

Question: What should we say to someone who backbites and says this is their way of venting?
A: Tell them to learn to vent to All!h. The is no good complaining to people except that you
depress a good friend or make someone who doesnt like you from your misfortune. When
someone hurts you, vent to All!h, like Prophet Jacob (alayhi wa sallam).

Question: is it still bad when do it about non muslims?
A: Even if we try to argue its not that severe, its still, bad manners. You need to really watch
out especially in work and school settings.
Question: If your family member has committed a crime and spouse complains about it all the
A: still counts as backbiting, complaint one that can help you, who can actually do something
about the situation.
Question: Is it ghibah to use someone as an example to teach a leson?
A: Yes, if the person youre telling the story knows who you are talking about. You can tell
stories about yourself, however. But if the person does not want his story to be told, you
cannot share it.

Islam is big on second chances. There are many opportunities to do tawbah. Even if a person
commits zina and then repented, they are not supposed to tell their spouse about it when
getting married. Similarly when you talk about person over and over and give them the label of
failure and bury them deeper and deeper.

A lot of backbiting is just having too much time on our hands, too many parties, and
invitations. Pick and choose the social gathering as you go to. Make an excuse if you think it'll
be more harm. Youre bound to mess up otherwise.

Caution: The idea of speak your mind is ridiculous.
2.3.4 Lying / al-Kadhib

Narrated Abdulla!h Ibn Mas%d (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) that the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

sallam) said, Truthfulness leads to righteousness, and righteousness leads to Paradise. And a
man keeps on telling the truth until he becomes a truthful person. Falsehood leads to al-faju!r
(i.e. wickedness, evil-doing), and al-faju!r leads to the (Hell) Fire, and a man may keep on telling
lies till he is written before Alla!h, a liar. [Sahi!h al-Bukha!ri and Muslim]

Siddiq is a person who always tells the truth and never tells a lie. Khthab is someone who is a
frequent liar. Lying with your actions is the essence of hypocrisy. Im!m Ibn Taymiyyah said
that everywhere in the Qur)!n that All!h mentions hypocrisy, (nif!q) He also mentions lying

There is a weak *ad&th that a believer can be a coward or miser but cannot be a liar. However,
the meaning of this hadith is somewhat true. To be a consistent liar would almost require that a
person be devoid of Im!n.

Abu! Hurayrah narrates that the Prophet said, It is sufficient lying for a person to say
everything he hears. In Islam there are no white lies. If a person is comfortable wiht small
lies, they are bound to become comfortable with big lies.

Conditions under which lying is acceptable

Dont keep looking for the exceptions because eventually you will fall into the
prohibited. Make sure the rules actually apply.

Asm! b. Yaz&d narrates from the Prophet ('allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) that there are three
forms of permissible lying: in battle, to your spouse, and to reconcile between two parties.

In battle you can lying is allowed in limited instaces, for example when it is strategic. But one
is not allowed to lie in something like a treaty and break such treaties.

It is allowed to lie to reconcile between two people. One can say to the individuals fighting,
He actually likes you and was saying good things about you.

It is allowed for husband and wife to exaggerate with each other to make each other
feel good. It is allowed for a man to tell his wife that she is the most beautiful woman
in the world.

Dont go overboard, however. A man told his wife, You are divorced if you are not more
beautiful than the moon. He then went to Im!m M!lik and asked if he was divorced, and
Im!m M!lik said, Yes. Im!m al-Sh!fii was present at the time and didnt want to disrespect
Im!m M!lik by contradicting him, so he followed the man home and said, You are not
divorced because your wife is more beautiful than the moon because All!h says, We have
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

created man with the best creation. Im!m M!lik later heard about this and laughed and
praised Im!m al-Sh!fii.

The righteous really hated lying and even when it was permissible to lie they found ways out
of lying. One time Im!m al-Shabi was studying a question of jurisprudence, and he wanted to
be left alone. He told his daughter, If anyone comes and asks for me, say he is not here (he
drew a circle on the door and told her to point at it when saying this).

On another occasion he told his wife, Fifty thousand years before the sky was introduced
to the world, All!h wrote your name next to mine.

Al-Mugh&rah b. Shubah wanted to marry a woman from a tribe, and his friend said, She is not
a good match for you, I saw her kiss a man one time. Two weeks later, he saw the man was
married to her. He asked the man what happened, and the man said, Yeah, she kissed her

2.3.5 Mockery

All!h says, O you, who have believed, let not a people ridicule [other] people; perhaps they
may be better than them; nor let women ridicule [other] women; perhaps they may be better
than them. And do not insult one another and do not call each other by [offensive] nicknames.
Wretched is the name of disobedience after [ones] faith. And whoever does not repent - then it
is those who are the wrongdoers. [Suratul-H!ujura!t: 11]

Do not let a group of believers mock another group of believers. All!h addresses the women
specifically in this ayah. Whenever you mock someone it is indication of a much greater
diseases of kibr. Kibr is a form of shirk. You are setting yourself up as a god besides All!h
(sub&!nahu wa ta!la) when you mock people. We think we are better than the people being
mocked also and put ourselves on a pedestal automatically when we do that.
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The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, It is enough of evil for a person that they
belittle their brother Muslim. Its important that we do not mock orput down people in
anyway, whether it be by words or by gesture. The only person we can mock is a person
who mocks others frequently and a person who publicly makes a mockery of Islam and
Muslims. Hence, Sarah Palin.
2.3.6 Two-Faced Speech

Al-Muntas!ir ibn Bila!l al-Ans!a!ri said: How many a friend displays affection with his tongue,
But is deceitful in my absence and is not regretful. He unwillingly amuses me so I may love
him, But his words in my absence strike me like arrows.
2.3.7 Revealing Secrets
Narrated from Ja!bir ibn Abdulla!h that the Prophet said, If a man tells you something and then
looks away, it is a trust. This is even if they didnt tell you specifically that it was a secret. If it
is obvious by indication that they dont want anyone else to know, then it is a trust.

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, "The signs of a hypocrite are three, whenever
he speaks, he tells a lie, whenever he promises, he always breaks it, and, if you trust him, he
proves to be dishonest." It is a form of trust or am!nah when someone tells you a secret.
In another narration there is a fourth trait, that is if he gets into an argument he overdoes it. If
you have one of these traits, then you have hypocrisy. If you have one of these characteristics,
then you are ! of a hypocrite and so forth until you become a full hypocrite if you have all four
of these traits.

In this day and age we have so many ways to break an amanah. If we just cc someone or
forward an email that others dont want you to share is enough to break a trust. One of signs
of the signs of the day of Judgement is when trust is lost. We dont know whats public and
whats private anymore. We really need to safeguard peoples amanah.

Umar Ibnl-Khat!t!a!b (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) said, I met Uthma!n b. Affa!n (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) and
offered H!afs!ah to him in marriage. I said, If you wish, I will marry H!afs!ah bint Umar to you.
He said, I will think about it. Several nights were passed, and then he said, I think that I do
not want to get married at this time. Then I met Abu! Bakr and I said, If you wish, I will marry
H!afs!ah bint Umar to you. Abu! Bakr kept quiet and did not give me any response. I became
more upset about him than about Uthma!n. Several nights passed, then the Messenger of Alla!h
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) proposed to her and I married her to him. Then Abu! Bakr met me
and said, Perhaps you felt upset when you offered H!afs!ah in marriage to me and I did not
reply? I said, Yes. He said, Nothing prevented me from responding to your offer but the fact
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September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

that I knew that the Messenger of Alla!h had mentioned her, and I did not want to disclose the
secret of the Messenger of Alla!h. If he had decided not to marry her, I would have accepted
your offer. [Sahi!h al-Bukha!ri]

Its still an amanah when the person hints to you in some shape or form that they dont want
other people to know about it, even if they dont say it directly. If someone tells you they are
going to harm someone or do some evil, however, you use your common sense and do what you
can to prevent harm.

Disclosing secrets of your spouse

Which secrets do we disclose the most? The secrets between husband and wife. This is the
most serious form of exposing a secret. These are secrets that should remain between husband
and wife. All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) said, They are a cover (garment) for you, and you are a
garment for them. [Suratul Baqarah: 187]

The libaas is actually supposed to conceal a fault and beautify it. But, when you tell their
secrets to others, then what kind of person are you? he Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam)
said, The worst person on the Day of Judgment is a man who became intimate with his wife
and revealed her secrets. This is not limited to intimate secrets. It is all secrets. It is a trust
between two people. The secrets between husband and wife should never be talked about
outside of the house or the bedroom. The most severe of the secrets to reveal is the sexual
secrets. You should never talk about this to someone else, not even in a joke. Dont spill
other peoples secrets.
2.3.8 Breaking Promises

And do not approach the property of an orphan, except in the way that is best, until he reaches
maturity. And fulfill [every] commitment. Indeed, the commitment is ever [that about
which one will be] questioned.}[Qur'!n 17:34]

All!h says, And those who are to their trusts and promises attentive [Suratul-Maa!rij: 32]
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Abdull!h b. Umar on the day of his death married off his daughter while he was dying because
he had promised a young man that he would marry his daughter to him and his daughter had
accepted it. They took their promises very seriously. He asked his daughter to have her nikkah
on the day he died.

Umar Ibnl-Kha##!b had a relationship with Hurmuz!n, one of the Ministers of Persia. In the
Battle of Qadisiyyah he was brought to Mad&nah and he asked to see Umar. They found him
asleep, on his shoes under a tree behind the masjid. He was shocked that he had no
bodyguards. He admired that and started crying and said, You rule, and you rule with justice,
so you became safe. All!h gave you safety and you were able to sleep. When it came time for
his execution after he was captured, he said, Ya am&rl-mumin&n, can I have a glass of water?
He was given a glass of water. He said, Am I protected until I finish drinking this water?
Umar said, You are protected. The emperor threw the glass on the ground and broke it.
Umar Ibnl-Kha##!b started consulting the "a*!bah to figure out what to do. He did not want
to break his promise. He eventually decided not to break his promise so he went to Hurmuz!n
and told him that he was free to go. Hurmuz!n then said the shah!dah. Umar Ibnl-Kha##!b
said, Why didnt you save us the trouble and take shah!dah first? He said, I didnt want
people to think that I was becoming Muslim because I was afraid. I wanted them to know I
was sincere. He knew Umar Ibnl-Kha##!b wouldnt break his promise. Umar then embraced
him. The justice and character of Umar won him over.

Dont make empty promises if you are not capable of fulfilling it. Try not to be committal if you
are not absolutely sure that you would be able to fulfill that commitment. Avoid saying things
that are absolutely committal. Do not say I will be there in five minutes, and then show up 20
minutes later.

If you are invited to two places then you should attend the first invitation so that you can be a
man or woman who is known to keep and fulfill his/her amaanah, unless the first person to
invite you says its okay to attend the second.

Abdull!h b. Mubarak borrowed a pen in al-Sh!m and forgot to return it to the person he took
it from. He went to his city, Marw in Persia and then realized he still had the pen. He went all
the way back, around 500km, to al-Sh!m, just to return the pen. He felt the severity of the
am!nah when he told the person he would give it back and didnt give it back.

Avoid the whole culture of wAll!hi, etc and making it very serious. Its an Arab problem for
the most part. If two people at a restaurant say, WAll!hi, youre not going to pay. And only
one of them pays, a promise is broken and one of them is a liar. Avoid these unnecessary lies.
2.3.9 Impermissible Joking
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

"Woe be on one who speaks and lies in order to make people laugh, woe be on him."
[Abu Dawood]

Sometimes we take things too far. Our deen has etiquettes. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam) was always smiling and laughing (Kaana Bassaman dahhaka). Not only was he always
smiling and laughing, but he made everyone around him smile and laugh. He made them laugh
because of his personality. There are entire volumes of books on the jokes of the Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam). Shaykh Omar mentioned the example of Shaykh Yaser Birjas, his
laughs are always mild yet he is always smiling face.

Abu! Hurayrah (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) said that the Prophet was told, O Prophet, you are joking
with us. He said, I only say what is true. [at-Tirmidhi] There are numerous examples of
this. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) made sure to be careful not to lie when he
would joke. Anas (ra'yAll!hu anhu) said, He would joke but would only say the truth.

Everything has its conditions and limits. In our culture of free speech, we can make fun of
anything and everything. But we cannot make fun of din. Dont joke about All!h, Qur)!n,
Aqeedah, Salah, so and so shaykh, or anything related to din. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam) even made sure his joking wasnt mocking anyone.

Alkhadhib (the liar) and lying are not exactly synonymous. Khadhib is only when you say a lie
and the other person thinks it true and takes it seriously. It is not included as a lie when a
person says stuff and everyone understands it as a joke. Be very careful, make sure the other
person would accept your joke

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was someone you wanted to be around. He was
down to earth and wanted to keep his sah!bahs happy. What is prohibited is that a person is
always laughing. Nuaim!n, one of the funniest sah!bahs, used to joke a lot. However, he was
also a veteran of every battle with the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) So, when it was
time to be serious, he was serious and down to business. This is how the sah!bahs were.

The Funniest Sahabi - Omar Suleiman - Qur)!n Weekly - YouTube

Another example is when Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was once sitting with Ali b.
Abi -!lib. Ali (ra'yAll!hu anhu) was very poor and would work all day to earn so that he
could eat that day. One day he earned 12 dates. He went to the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam) and said, Ya Ras%lull!h, I want to share this food with you. He gave six dates to the
Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) and kept six for himself. When Ali noticed people
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coming towards them, he pushed all the seeds in front of the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam). The "a*!bahs knew they could joke with him and understood he appreciated jokes as
long as they were not overboard. When the "a*!bah came, Ali (ra'yAll!hu anhu) said, Look
at the Prophet of All!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam), he ate all of the dates by himself.
Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) laughed and said, Look at Ali b. Abi -!lib, when he
eats the dates, he swallows the seeds too. It was understood that this was a joke. This shows
the light-hearted nature of Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam).

Ibn Rajab reported that Ali b. Abi -!lib said, Make joking part of your conversation the
way that you would put salt in your food. These words should be written in gold. Too
much salt will give you a heart attack, and not enough will make you bland.

We should take care not to frighten people when joiking. Dont jump out at people- wa
aamanahum min khawf, give people security. For example during the expedition of Tabuk,
they tied up a sahaba and it frightened him and he thought he was captured. The Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) did not approve of that. He said, It is not permissible for a person
to frighten his brother.

Don't take people's belongings in joking or seriousness. Many times our jokes are the expense
of people and their honor, but when Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) joked with people, he
actually made them feel better and honored. For example, he told an old lady that no old
woman will enter Jannah. She became upset, but then he told her, People dont enter jannah in
their old age.

Once the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) grabbed Z!hir, a free person, in the
marketplace and said, Who will by this slave from me. Rasoolullah approached him, while he
was selling his merchandise. Rasoolullah caught him in between the arms from the back in such
a manner that he (Sayyidina Zaahir radiyAll!hu anhu) could not see him. Zaahir (radiyAll!hu
anhu) said, "Who is this?, leave me." But when he saw with the corner of his eye that it was
Rasoolullah, he straightened his back and began pressing it to the chest of Rasoolullah (For as
long as he gained this opportunity it was better than a thousand gifts). Rasool All!h then said,
"Who will purchase this slave?" Zaahir (radiyAll!hu anhu) replied, "O Rasool of All!h, if you
shall sell me, you will be selling a defective thing, and will earn a very little sum." Rasoolullah
said, "No, you are not defective in the sight of All!h, but very valuable." He joked, but he did it
to make someone feel better, not at someones expense.

Keep in mind the value of joking and at the same time, do no not make it the expense of your
brother or sisters honor. This includes going overboard with excessive flattering.
2.3.10 Miscellaneous
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Excessive Flattery
Its good to encourage, thank and congratulate people but at the same time don't go overboard
with flattering people.

Ab% Bakra narrated that a man praised another man in front of the Prophet. The Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said to him, Woe to you. You have cut the neck of your
companion. Woe to you. You have cut the neck of your companion. This is to praise someone
so much that you flatter them and ruin them.

At! said that once a man was praising another person in the presence of Ibn Umar. Ibn Umar
picked up some dirt and threw it at the man. One time some came to calling, O best of people,
O son of the best of people. He said, Calm down. Im not the best of people, nor I am the son
of the best of people. Dont go overboard when we flatter people.

When someone flatter you, dont respond with how terrible you are, because they will just
praise you even more. Instead tell yourself how bad you are and stay quiet hoping they will
stop. Also show them you are not happy or comfortable with that flatter; for example put your
head down.

Foul Language
Cursing and foul language are different things in Islam. Cursing would literally mean to make
a dua or invoke a curse against a person. This is very dangerous since the Prophet ("allall!hu
alayhi wa sallam), said that if you invoke a curse on a person, the curse can come back to you if
they do not deserve it.

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, The believer is not one who is aggressive and
Ab%sive with his language, and he does not curse and he is not foul. It is not from the
character of a believer. Shaykh Kamal El-Mekki said, Dont make your angels write down
curse words.

Speaking Urdu
Speaking Urdu or Arabic, or any language when there is another person sitting with you who
doesnt speak that language is haram.

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, If three people are in a room two of them
should not be speaking privately. The third needs to know what is being said. This includes
languages. The person who does not understand what is being said will always become
suspicious that the other two are talking about him. If we are at a grocery store and the clerk
is speaking Chinese to someone else, we automatically assume that they are talking about us.

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September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Its common courtesy to not speak a different language in front of other people. It may even
fall into tehreem. This can include even when playing basketball together. They might think
you are curing them out.

On way to approach this is by diversifying where we seat at a dinner party. Try to sit next to
someone who speaks another language to avoid this problem.
2.3.11 Pride / al-Kibr
There are different manifestations of arrogance and pride. The most serious one is kibr.

Quilala insaano ma akffara- created from a dirty drop of fluidremember how small you are

The seriousness of kibr as a sin: All!h says,

Indeed, He (Alla!h) does not like the arrogant. (al-Nah!l: 23)

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, The one who possesses an iota of kibr in his
heart shall not be granted admission to Jannah. He was (then asked), [But] OMessenger of
All!h! A man likes to have fine clothing and footwear. Is this included in kibr? He
responded, No. All!h is Beautiful and loves beauty. Kibr is the rejection of truth and
condescension of others.

Kibr is made up of two different things: denying truth and looking down on people.

1. Denying the truth. You are putting yourself at the same level as the creator. You have
intellectual pride. You are directly interfering with the legislation of All!h, which is nobodys
business. This comes from the consumer mentality.

We are pitiful creations. At the end of the day, we are limited by our senses of touch, sight,
smell, and hearing. We are so weak as human beings that you can get on a rollercoaster and
when a cardboard character jumps at you, you scream. This same person thinks he understands
reality enough to debate with All!h and accuse the Qur)!n or Sunnah of being illogical. We
always accuse ourselves and our own faulty intellect before accusing the creator.

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2. Judgement- All!h is the one to judge people (Al-Hakim), you have no right to judge anybody.
Kibr is an action of the heart. Abu Hurayrah narrates a &ad#th that the Prophet ("allall!hu
alayhi wa sallam) said, There were two men from among Bani Isr!&l striving for the same
goal. One of them would commit sin and the other would strive to do his best in the world.
The man who exerted himself in worship continued to see the other in sin. He would say,
Refrain from it. One day, he found him in sin and said to him, Refrain from it. The sinner
said, Leave me alone with my Lord. Have you been sent as a watchman over me? The
worshipper said, I swear by All!h, All!h will not forgive you, nor will He admit you to
Paradise. Then their souls were taken back (by All!h), and they met together with the Lord
of the worlds. All!h said to this man who had striven hard in worship, Had you knowledge
about Me or had you power over that which I had in My Hand? All!h said to the man who
sinned, Go and enter Paradise by My Mercy. He said about the other, Take him to Hell.
Abu Hurayrah said, By Him in whose hand my soul is, he spoke a word by which this world
and the next world of his were destroyed.

Judging others and thinking you are better than others is kibr. Only All!h has the right to
Judge. Never think you are better than other people. No matter how bad someone is, dont
ever allow yourself to say that the person is going to Hellfire. That person may die in a
situation pleasing to All!h, and All!h may punish you just because of that state. Just think of
Iblees pride. His pride was one that of religious. He not only felt he was better than human
beings, but he had also built up an ego from worshiping All!h for years before this.

Manifestations of Pride
1. Thinking youre better than people but you try to act humble
Sometimes people are arrogant but try to act like they have a humble personality. You are not
fooling All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la). When a person has the disease of thinking he is better
than people but around people he acts humble, he has kibr. It is only a matter of time before he
is exposed.

2. Degrading others with your actions
It is obvious that you think you are better than others, but you are not saying it.

3. Constantly bragging about your superiority or accomplishments
Its when you think you are better than other people, you act like you are better than
other people and you say it flat out that you are better. This person has reached the
level of shaytan and is at an absolute low. That level of kibr is kufr.

Qualities of a Person of Pride
1. Likes people to stand up for him
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September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

If a person walks into a room and you are sitting down, can you stand up to honor the
person? Yes, you can. Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) told the 'a&!bah to stand
when Mu!dh walked in to honor their leader. The problem is when a person walks in
and wants people to stand for him. If people seek to honor you, it is okay as long as you
are not desiring it and not looking for it.
2. Wants others to walk behind him
3. Doesnt visit people because he feels he is only deserving of being visited
You expect people to always visit you because you are special. Make sure that you
visit people and dont always expect them to visit you. Humble yourself by calling
someone that wasnt expecting your call. Find someone who didnt think they had a
special place with you and check up on them when they are sick.
Tip: Always keep your old friends around, because the ones that befriend you after
you are famous may not always be sincere.
4. Doesnt like others to be on his level
5. Expects others to carry his things
6. Does not engage in chores

Remedies of Kibr
1. Know yourself. Remember how small you are.

Sometimes its acquainting yourself with people, coming down to their level that will help.
Don't think you're at a higher level. Being part of the people, doing chores, serving others
having that trait of doing the degrading things is a great tarbiyah.

Im!m M!lik once saw a man who was filthy drunk and foaming at the mouth and saying,
All!h. No one saw the man drink even though everyone knew he was drunk, so he couldnt
be punished, which shows the justice of Shar#ah. Im!m M!lik wiped the mans mouth with a
handkerchief and picked him up and held him and walked him home. Look at the care and
kindness. That night, Im!m M!lik saw a dream that it was being told to him: We have
purified you as you have purified your brother. The next day, he went to the masjid for fajr and
didnt understand what he saw. He saw the man dressed in the best garment with n%r in his
face praying 'al!tl-fajr. It was the first time he saw him in the masjid, and he asked, What
happened? How did your situation change so fast? The man said to him, The one who came
to you in your dream came to me in mine. Im!m M!lik came down to the level of that person
and helped him and gave him dignity, so All!h purified and elevated Im!m M!lik as a result of

Generally speaking, someone who is acquainted with the poor and people in hardship has a
lesser chance of becoming prideful and thinking he is better than people. Authentic &ad#th in
A*mad: A man complained to the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) that his heart is
becoming hard. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Caress the head of an orphan.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
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When the children of H!abashah came, Rasu!lulla!h (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) would
embarrass himself by speaking broken Abyssinian just to play with the kids. This shows that he
didnt feel so big. He (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) was with the people and at the level of the

2. Engage in chores. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) would take care of his own
clothes and shoes. In a gathering, the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was always
serving and never being served. Look for ways to serve to keep your ego and pride down and
to belittle and lower yourself.

Shaykh Sha'rawi would go and clean the masjid bathroom every time people would speak so
highly of him. Such acts help keep us humble. Clean the bathrooms, organize the shoe rack, etc.
Make sure in every gathering you're the one always serving people.

3. Know your Lord. Remember how much greater All!h is.
4. Remember Death. Remember that you will be eaten by the bugs and that you will be buried 6
feet underground. You will be decompose to just bones and will have to stand in front of All!h
the same way as everyone else.
2.3.12 Love of Prestige/ $ubbl-J!h wa riyaasa

People of righteousness and piety avoid celebrity.

Scholars who write about maq!'idl-Shar#ah talk about acts that need to be done to promote
the d#n. For example, Salatul-Jamaat, Hajj, etc. The overall aspects of religion are better to be
done in private and in home, however. This includes salahs that are not fard, fasting, sadaqa
and more. Dont develop a love for celebrity and prestige in your heart.

Craving for leadership can really destroy you as a person. Umar b. Sad b. Abi Waqq!" came
to Sad b. Abi Waqq!" during the time of Ali when the fitnah started. Sad b. Abi Waqq!" fled
away from people and was raising sheep on the outskirts of Mad&nah. Umar b. Sad wanted to
be a governor, so he went to his father. When Sad b. Abi Waqq!" saw his son, he said, I seek
refuge in All!h from the evil of the one coming to me now. Umar b. Sad said, You were in
Badr and should be taking on leadership. Sad said to his son, All!h loves the slave who is
fearful of Him and self-sufficient and is hidden. Umar b. Sad left his dad frustrated and tried
to latch onto leadership wherever he could find it. Mu!wiyah gave him honorable tasks
and then under Yaz&d b. Mu!wiyah, he latched onto leadership where he could find it. He
wanted to be in the spotlight. When al-$usayn revolted, he was the one given the order to
stop al-$usayn. He didnt want to do it, but at the same time, he was told that if he didnt,
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

then his leadership would be taken away. It was his army that killed al-$usayn. Think about
it: his love for leadership led him to that ending. Your quest for leadership and to always be in
the spotlight can be extremely dangerous. It will cause you to leave your principles.

What about the issue of leadership and being recognized? One of the things that is important
to understand is that if leadership seeks you, then accept it. If you seek leadership, then you
have a problem. In Islam, you dont give leadership to those who seek it. This is what
Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said. If you want leadership that badly, then it will
destroy you.

Abu Dhaarr was a great zaahid but he didn't get leadership when requested it. The Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said if his &m!n was to be weighed against everyone else, it would
be heavier. When he asked the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) for leadership, the
Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) didnt give it to him and said, We dont give it to those
who ask for it. Leadership is an amana and it is on the day of judgement a humiliation and
remorse for some.

Is it okay to present your skills in pursuit of leadership sometimes in Islam? Yes, if no one else
is there to do the job. You can see it as a means of Dawah.

What if leadership comes to you? What is the ruling? If you get pushed into a position of
leadership without desiring it, take it and do your best to work on your intention. Do your
best not to seek it. The great leaders that are those pushed into their positions. When Umar
b. Abdul-Az&z was appointed khalifah, people literally had to put him the mimbar. Every time
he would try to get away from the masjid they would put him back on the mimbar, until he
gave his inauguration speech.

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, What is more harmful than two wolves
attacking a flock of sheep is a mans love for status and leadership. The sahabas would pass
around questions, even the simple ones, to another sahaba. They had no desire for the

Abdull!hb Mubarak would conceal his face in public. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam) would dress and sit like the others in a gathering. He did not like to draw attention to
himself. Ibn Qud!mah quotes a *ad&th from Zayd b. Th!bit: If we were in the company of the
Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) and we talked about dunya, he would talk about dunya. If
we talked about !khirah, he would talk about !khirah too. If we talked about food, he would
talk about food too. (Bukh!ri) He ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was at the level of the people.
Abdull!h b. $!rith said, If you walked into a gathering, you would not be able to distinguish
him by his clothes. He did not love to have prestige.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Try to get rid of that love of prestige that a person can develop. Dont demand attention to
yourself, thats what leads to riya. Dont ever seek a position of leadership or spotlight.

Narated By Abu Hurayrah : People say that I have narrated many Hadiths (The Prophet's
narrations). Had it not been for two verses in the Qur'an, I would not have narrated a single
Hadith, and the verses are: "Verily those who conceal the clear sign and the guidance which
We have sent down . . . (up to) Most Merciful." (2:159-160).

Sufyan atThawri said, He who desires to be seen by the people is not truthful to All!h.
2.3.13 Showing off / al-Riy!
The Root of Riya
Showing off is the manifestation of the person having a love for prestige. Riy! is the only
thing a person who is not a disbeliever gets threatened for in Juz Amma. All!h warns the
people that pray and are forgetful and show off (S%ratl-M!%n).

Imam Ibn Al-Qayyim said, "Deeds without sincerity are like a traveler who carries in his water-
jug dirt. The carrying of it burdens him and it brings no benefit."

Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) listed the following as the first three people to enter
jahannam: A person who was a teacher of Qur)!n, a person who was extremely charitable, and a
person who fought and died for All!h in the sight of the people. Why? Because there no
sincerity. They did it to show off to the people. It wasnt fisabeelillah. They wanted people to
say MashaAll!h to they and they got it in this life.

Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, A person will be brought on the Day of
Judgment, and All!h will tell him, Run to those you used to show off your deeds to in dunya
and see if they have anything to give you today. You turn those people into gods by doing
actions seeking their approval.

We should also stay away from the disease of mixed intentions. Its somewhat for All!h and
somewhat for other reasons. All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la) says in a &ad#th qudsi: Whoever does
an action seeking My approval and seeking others approval, then I abandon him and his shirk.
Dont use the deen to seek dunya. Dont use what All!h gave as a means of getting close to him
to gain the approval of the people.

Im!m Ibn al-Qayyim said, To shorten a persons thawb to a point where it becomes excessive
is a form of showing off. He saw people in his time pulling up their thawb really high to show
off, whereas the legislation of thawb was started to combat arrogance. We see the same
problem nowadays.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

(ishah (ra'yAll!huanha) saw a group of men walking slowly, and she asked about them and
was told they were praying qiy!m all night. She said, May All!h have mercy on Umar.
When he walked, he walked fast. When he hit, he hit hard. Umar would be up all night in
qiy!m but he would try to hide it from people and not show it. He would keep it a secret
between him and All!h.

The word ,%fi comes from the word meaning wool. Im!m al-Ghaz!li spoke against the
people who would show off by wearing wool. He condemned those who wore wool
unnecessarily because it was a way of displaying that a person is humble and a z!hid.

Five Forms of Riya!
1. Riya! through physical appearance
2. Riya! through physical actions
3. Riya! through words
4. Riya! through deeds
5. Riya! through connections

The Degrees of Riya!:
1. Forming the intention originally to only commit a deed for people to see
2. He seeks a reward, but is so absorbed with riya! that he wouldnt do that deed alone

Levels and Permissibility of Riya
1. Haram-Forbidden
a. With all forms of religion
b. With matters of dunya if have intention is to degrade people
c. Showing off on matters acquired through haram means
2. Makrooh-Disliked
a. Something in dunya showed off and it gives you a big head (you become
3. Mubah-Neither Liked nor Disliked
a. To show someone something All!h has given you from dunya without boasting
or putting anyone down
4. Mustahab-Recommended
a. Giving charity in public in order to encourage people
b. All!h is beautiful and loves beauty. You demonstrate beauty to demonstrate to
people the beauty of the deen. Yes, you can have a long beard and dress really nice! Its
actually good for the din. Women should similarly look nice and dignified, but avoid
the flashy hijabs. All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) says in surah Duha: 11- wa amma bi
nimatika rabbika fa haddith But as for the favor of your lord, speak of it Im!m M!lik
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

thought that scholars should dress well so that they are respected in society. When
Umar became khalifa, he wanted to remove some ornaments from the masjid, but left
them when he was told that they were kept there because the Romans would frequently

Umar b. Abdul-Az&z was asked, If I am prostrating in public and Shay"!n comes to me
and tells me I am lengthening my suj%d so that people praise me, what do it do? He said,
Fight your Shay"!n and lengthen your suj%d even more. Seek refuge in All!h from doing it
for other peoples sake. Dont ever forsake your action, thats a greater form of riya.

Also dont abandon actions when you are not being appreciated. Volunteer burnout, etc..
Were you doing it for All!h or were you doing it for the people? This would be a sign you are
doing things for reasons other than pleasing All!h.

The Hidden Shirk

Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) called riy! the hidden shirk. He said, I fear for you
most the hidden shirk, which is riy!. You make all of the people into hidden gods. Riya in
worship is a form of minor shirk. This is why we need to avoid mixed intentions. It is a hidden
shirk because at the end of the day youre worshipping the people, since they are the motive
behind your actions. All!h (sub*!nahuwa ta!la) says in a *ad&th qudsi: Whoever does an
action seeking My approval and seeking others approval, then I abandon him and his shirk.

Remedies for Riya

Abu Hurayrah (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) reported that Abu Bakr asked, O Messenger of Alla!h! Teach
me some words so that I may recite them in the morning and in the evening. The Messenger
of Alla!h (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Recite these words:

Alla!humma fa!t!iras-sama!wa!ti wal-ard!i, a!limal-ghaybi wash-shaha!dati, Rabba kulli shayin
wama!li!kahu. Ash-hadu an la!ila!ha illa!Anta, au!dhu bika min sharri nafsi, washarrish- Shayt!a!ni
washirkihi. (O Alla!h! Creator of the heavens and the earth! Knower of the hidden and the
exposed! Rabb of everything and every one! I bear witness that none has the right to be
worshipped but You. I seek Your Protection from the evil of my own self from the evil of Satan
and from the evil of shirk to which he calls.)

The Messenger of Alla!h (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) added: Recite these words in the
morning and the evening and when you go to bed. The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam)
taught us a dua! to make: O Alla!h, I seek refuge in you from committing shirk knowingly, and
I ask your forgiveness for doing it unknowingly. Allaahumma innee aoothu bika an ushrika
bika shaiann wa anaa alamu, wa astaghfiruka limaa laa alamu.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

What if you do things and are praised for it but you are not seeking praise? Mu!dh ibn Jabal
complained to the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) that people were saying too many nice
things about him. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, A person who does
something for All!h and is praised by the people, then that is the hastening of All!h giving glad
tidings to the believer. When other people praise you without you seeking their praise, it is a
good thing. Why? Because the witness of the people will count on the Day of Judgment as long
as you are not seeking it.

However, every time people praise you, you should remind yourself how bad you are. Keep
making sincere dua for sincerity. Abu Bakr RA would make the dua: O Allah, make me better
than what they think of me, and forgive me for what they do not know about me.

If you have thoughts of riyaa, but do not pursue them, All!h will not punish you for that.

There are many examples from the righteous salaf of how they used to hide their good deeds,
just as something they wanted to hide: secret habits.

D!w%d b. Abi Hind fasted for 40 years straight except Eids without his family knowing. He
would take food for lunch and give it in "adaqah and then come home after maghrib and eat
with his family. SubhanAll!h!

Shaykh Hatem Al-Haj cries all the time and tries to act like its not from his kushu. Shaykh
Omar mentioned that one time in the AMJA conference, someone mentioned how 14 people
were killed and he started to sob. He eventually excused himself and left the room.

Eddie from The Deen Show often breaks into tears if you notice, thats when the camera turns
away from him.

Scholars said about Ali b. $usayn that people would get their livelihood in Mad&nah until the
day he passed away. He would leave food and water on their doorsteps without ever being
caught. They only found out after seeing the marks on his back from the bags he would carry.

There were some people from the '!li&#n who would cry at night on one side of the pillow, and
the person sleeping next to them would not find out until they found the other side of the
pillow wet.

Mu*ammad b. Wasi would wake up and pray qiy!m without waking his wife and then would
go to his bed and wake up his wife to pray qiy!m so they could pray together.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

If you develop a secret relationship with All!h, riyaa will not be an issue for you. The Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) would pray his sunnahs at home and said, Do not turn your
homes into graveyards. Do things that people dont see you do. Keep a portion of your
charity secret. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, A secret charity extinguishes
the anger of your Lord.

One time someone visited the Prophet, upon him blessings and peace, who said: Who will host
this man? One of the Ansar immediately said: I will. Then he rushed to his wife and told her:
Provide generously for the guest of the Messenger of All!h. She replied: We only have food
for the children! He said: Prepare the food then light the candle and put the children to bed at
dinner-time. She did as he said [and put the children to sleep on an empty stomach] then she
got up to tinker with the light and she put it out. Then she and her husband pretended to eat
but remained hungry that night. The next morning they went to see the Prophet, upon him
blessings and peace, and he said: Last night All!h laughed or was astonished [the narrator
hesitated] at what you two did! Then All!h revealed the verse: ..but they give them
preference above themselves even though they are in privation (59:9).

Ibn Quda!mah said, Ikhla!s! is to save yourself from the peoples sight. If a person abandons the
action, then he falls into a greater riya!. S!idq (truthfulness) is to save yourself from yourself.
Dont forget who you are, when shaitan tells you look how great you are.

Does riya! completely make my worship worthless?

Three Signs of Riya!
1. To love the pleasure produced by being praised
2. To flee from the pain caused by being dispraised
3. To look greedily at what other people possess

...They do not fear the blame of a critic. That is the favor of Alla!h ; He bestows it upon whom
He wills. And Alla!h is all-Encompassing and Knowing. (al-Ma!idah: 54)
2.3.14 Self-Deceit / al-Ghur%r

Al-Ghur%r means self-deceit; its when you think so highly of yourself that you dont even think
anything is wrong anymore. Al-ujb means to be conceited; its doing good and feeling good
about it

Im!m ibn al-Qayyim said, If you were to sleep all night and not wake up for a single rak*ah
and feel bad about that, then it is more beloved to All!h than praying all night and being
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

proud of it. You become satisfied and content so that you dont do anything anymore. Dont
ever think you are safe, that is a very dangerous situation to be in.

Al-$asan al-Ba"ri said, Do not think highly of yourself because of your surroundings in
Jannah. (dam (alayhil-sal!m) was in Jannah and we all know what happened with that. Do
not think highly of yourself because you are a worshipper. Ibl&s was the greatest of
worshippers to the point where he could accompany the angels and we all know what
happened to him. Do not think highly of yourself because you are related to righteous people.
Abu Lahab was the uncle of the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) and we know what
happened to him. Never feel content with yourself, and never think that you are an amazing
person who is always doing good.

Say, [O Muh!ammad], Shall we [believers] inform you of the greatest losers as to [their]
deeds? [They are] those whose effort is lost in worldly life, while they think that they are
doing well in work. (al-Kahf: 103-104)

Satan promises them and arouses desire in them. But Satan does not promise them except
delusion. (al-Nisa!: 120)

Causes of Self-Deception:

1. This Worldly Life
2. False Wishes and Vain Desires
3. The Righteousness of Ones Parents

You may be the son of anyone at all, but acquire integrity, Its virtue will enrich you, leaving no
need for a noble pedigree. The real man is the one who says, Here I am! The one who says,
My father was, is not the man. ~ Well-known lines of Arab poetry

Categories of those Afflicted by Self-Deception
1. The Scholars
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

He thinks he is safe because people him tell how good he is that he forgets himself. The
Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, On the Day of Judgment, the most grievous
torment will be inflicted upon a scholar whose knowledge was of no avail. (al-T!abara!ni)

2. The Worshipers
Im!m Ibn al-Qayyim said, As for good deeds, both a righteous person and a sinner is capable
of doing good deeds, but no one will be able to abandon sin except for one who is truthful to
All!h and his faith. Abandoning sin is harder than doing good deeds. Dont be deceived by
your worship. Its like those people who say Im spiritual but not religious. I like to worship
but I dont want to give up anything in my life is essentially what their problem is.There are
people who like to do good things because of the good feelings they get from the act itself.
Abandoning sin is much harder. The worshipper allows his spirituality to be his disguise from
his sins. He only worries about doing more good deeds and not dealing with his sins.

Abu Ayyu!b al-ans!a!ri said, A person may do a good deed and rely on it and forget his sins and
will meet Alla!h with his sins surrounding him. On the other hand, a man may commit a sin and
never stop fearing the consequences of the sins until he meets Alla!h safe and sound.

3. The Ascetics

Al-Ghaza!li said there will be a people claiming exemption and secret knowledge. They will say
they have reached a point of being an awliyah and that they have secret knowledge.

Umar b. Abdul-Az&z commanded the scholars to teach publicly because he said if they
taught privately, then people will claim they have secret knowledge. A person who is an
ascetic and thinks he has secret qualities and thinks he is exempt from the punishment of
All!h. Shaykh gave the example of Muhammad Ibn Ismaeel (aka Bukhari) who faced the fitna
from the governor that insisted he teach their kids privately in the palace.

4. The one who frequently gives in charity.
They spend a lot in charity and think that it absolves them of living according to the
Sunnah. This is very true in modern day America in our mas!jid. This person is deceived.
They dont become exempt from the rest of the Shar&ah just because they contribute

Treatment for Self-Deception
Realizing the Reality of Matters
Knowing Oneself and Ones Lord
Knowing this Worldly Life and the Hereafter
Knowing the Path to Alla!h and How to Overcome Obstacles

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) says in Surah Baqarah: 17

Their example is that one who kindled a fire, but when it illuminated what was around him,
Alla!h took away their light and left them in darkness [so] they could not see. On the Day of
Judgement, All!h takes light away from them. Hypocrites will be left in darkness. Ibn Al-
Qayyim said the one who fails to kindle light inside will have no light on Day of Judgement.
Ask yourself: Do you have noor on inside or all on outside?

In S%ratl-$ad#d, All!h says on the Day of Judgment, the hypocrites will call out to the
believers, Give us some of the light that you have. The light was on the inside, and on the
Day of Judgment, the light All!h put in their hearts is shining and they can walk through the
'ir!". All!h left the hypocrites in darkness and says, The hypocrites are left behind a wall
between them and the true believers who had light in their hearts. They will call out to them,
Cant we be with you? They said, No, because you tested yourself and had doubts and were
deluded by your desires and the chief deceiver (Shay"!n) deceived you. Now you will not be
able to pay anything to get out of this. No compensation will be taken from you and nor from
those who disbelieve. This means that you had a chance to kindle this light on the inside in
your heart. The goal was to kindle it inside.

Video, reflection of ayahs 12-17 of Surah al Hadeed recited by Salman al Utaybi
( )

We should make the dua from surah Tahreem: 8-Rabbana atmim la ana noorana waghfirlanaa
innaka ala kulli shay in qadeer-Our Lord, perfect for us our light and forgive us. Indeed You
are over all things competent.
2.3.15 Envy / al-$asad

It is problematic to translate some terms from Arabic and English. $asad is translated as envy
or extreme jealousy. In English, jealousy always has a negative connotation and is not good.
For example, when talking about the marital relationships and saying that the woman should
obey the man, obedience is different from #aa, which has a component of obedience and
following. There is a wide spectrum. Positive jealousy is gheerah. Sometimes people translate
that as jealousy. If you could translate: gheerah is jealous for something and hasad is jealous of
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

! Permissible types of envy
! Forbidden types of envy
! Main causes of envy: Self - pride/ competition, Enmity and wickedness
! How to remedy envy
! Difference from being jealous for and jealous from
! Jealousy is good as long as you dont get to the point that you are accusing someone

Abu Hurayrah (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) said that the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said,
Beware of envy because envy consumes (destroys) the virtues just as the fire consumes the
firewood, or he said grass. (Abu Da!wu!d)

If anything is going wrong in your day, you usually blame hasad, ayn, etc. This is very
overdone. There is a lot of deviancy and lot of misunderstanding, which leads to excess denial
on the existence of hasad.

Prophet said - AlAynu al Haqq- The evil eye is true.

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was once approached by the "a*!bah. Sad b.
Ub!dah said, If I ever catch my wife committing zina, I would kill her with the sharpest part
of the sword and him. The "a*!bah told the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) that what
he is saying is too much. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Are you amazed by
the gh&rah of Sad? Wall!hi, I have more gh&rah than Sad. And All!h has more gh&rah than

Gheerah is good as long as you are not accusing an innocent person. It is good for a husband to
have gh#rah for his wife and the wife to have gh#rah for the husband. As for the unmarried
woman, All!h has gh#rah for them.

It is extremely important for husband to have gh&rah for his wife and the wife to have gh&rah
for the husband. It is good for the father to have gh&rah for the daughter and the mother to
have gh&rah for the son. It keeps a sense of honor

It offends All!h when people don't act in a dignified manner. The Prophet (s) told us that we
should have gheerah - la yadkhulu al jannah al dhayoof - the one who doesn't have honor will
not enter Jannah.

We live in a society where it is peep my husband/wife. The husband and wife sit on the stage
during the wedding in front of everyone, and everyone takes a picture of them and then posts
it on Facebook. This is disgusting. Dont you feel any sense of shame and honor? Today it is
normal for this to happen. Husbands want people to know their wives are beautiful and for
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

them to wear tight clothes. They want to show off their spouses. Even women want to show
off their handsome husbands. When we dont feel a sense of shame or honor for your husband
or wife, then there is a problem. People don't have gheerah anymore and one of the reasons for
insecurity in relationships is that the husband/wife doesn't feel gheerah for the other.

Some people have actually asked on facebook to Shaykh Omar: If you love your wife so much,
how come you dont post her picture. Don't let other girls take pictures with your husband or
other guys take pictures with your wife. You should not want to parade your spouses. It
creates insecurity issues and then people start crying about nazar, etc. You should want to
conceal them. There should be a sense of ghira.

Ali once looked at Fatimah and he got jealous of the siwaak she was using and he wrote an
entire qaseeda about the siwaak,

O stick of Araak, you found your way into her mouth
Weren't you afraid, O stick of the Araak that I will see you (Araak)
If you would be someone I could have killed, I would have killed you
No one has ever escaped me O siwaak, except you (siwaaka) [rough translation]

This is jealous for, not jealous of and is good. It made Fathimah feel good and validated. It had
its limits.

Everyone thinks that hasad is taking place. If you are Palestinian and something goes wrong -
it is either hasad or yahood. We blame it for everything. Most people blame things on sihr
(magic). The natural consequence is the next question - who did it? This encourages tajassus -
evil thoughts of people, backbiting and more fitna. You then start looking at different people,
and start accusing different people, terrible for a society. We all like playing the victim card.
Ibn Taymiyya said: most of it (hasad) is making a mockery of people

A sister once came to Shaykh and said I think I'm possessed by jinn, and started saying strange
things. When asked how she felt when the Qur)!n was recited, she said she felt okay. She was
not possessed. When people read Qur)!n, if there is a jinn you will feel the pain. Muawwidhaat
and sihr cannot exist simultaneously. Sometimes it is real, don't blame everything on Hasad or
sihr though. All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) told us in surah Hijr, Indeed, my servants, no
authority will you have over them except those who follow you of the deviators (42).

Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, al ayn can even cause death to a person.

Read muawwidaat together with family, do azkaar, read hisnul muslim dua. A possession
cannot co-exist with zikrullah, hisnul muslim.

Not being out there and flashy is a way of avoiding hasad for yourself.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Yaqub (Alayhis Salaam) told his sons when you go to Egypt, don't enter upon the people from
one door, enter from different doors. He had 12 sons and he wanted to avoid attracting
unnecessary attention.

When Yusuf (Alayhis Salaam) told him about his dream, ruya, la taqsus ruya ala akhwatika...
Yaqub ((Alayhis Salaam) told him: not to narrate your dream to your brothers or they will
contrive against you a plot. Indeed Shatan, to man, is a manifest enemy (surah Yusuf: 5). Only
share things with people you can trust.

Permissible Types of Envy

Narrated Ibn Masu!d; I heard the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) saying, There is no
envy except in two: a person whom Alla!h has given wealth and he spends it in the right way,
and a person whom Alla!h has given wisdom (i.e. religious knowledge) and he gives his
decisions accordingly and teaches it to the others. This is allowed because that intention is not
of hatred. You are happy for them but you also aspire to be like them and look up to good. In
terms of deen you should look at to those people above you and in terms of dunya look at those
below you. Look at those struggling in Palestine, Afghanistan, and other countries around the
world. Put this to practice and it will solve a lot of the problems.

Musa (alayhi sallam) was jealous of the Prophet Mohammed ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) but
gave him sincere advice. He shared his experience and conveyed the ummah will not to do 50
prayers and kept giving advice over and over to Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam). He was
jealous of the ummah. Just look at what he had to deal with himself and so he admired our

Comparisons are destructive and naturally stir the go of people. The Prophet ('allall!hu
alayhi wa sallam) didnt allow the father of Num!n to give him a gift without giving a
similar gift to his other siblings. This naturally stirs up enmity. Dont do it with your
children or people in the community, especially not in front of them. This is why people start
hating each other. Dont compare yourself to others.

Ibn S&r&n said, I have never envied anyone for anything related to this worldly life, because if
he is to be one of the residents of Paradise, how can I envy him for something pertaining to
worldly life while he is going to Paradise? And if he is to be one of the residents of the Fire,
how can I envy him for something pertaining to worldly life while he is going to the Fire!

There are root causes and specific causes. The ultimate Root cause is Hubb al Duniya (loving
the world too much).

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

1. Self-pride - Thinking you are better than other people, more deserving than others
2. Competition - Avoid comparisons! We purposely encourage the wrong type of
competition among our kids. If you say how good the other kid is - then it causes hatred
among them and it hurts their tarbiyah. Instead it encourages competition amongst
them for wrong reasons. You foster that hatred, they fall into envy really dangerous
Dont get sucked into comparisons! The Prophet prevented Nouman al Basheers father
to give him a gift without giving other siblings a gift
We all naturally have a love for competition. Ibn Sir&n said, Had the Prophet ("allall!hu
alayhi wa sallam) not specified the permissible types of envy, we would have been in a
lot of trouble because we all like to compete. Some people are superficial and will
compete with gold.
3. Enmity - Sometimes you just hate someone. You don't want good for that person, you
cant stand that person doing well, you take the grudge out of the person.This is from
the worst of conditions to have. As much as his enemies did to the Prophet ("allall!hu
alayhi wa sallam), he never wished evil for them. Leave other people alone. Dont wish
bad for other people because it will come back to you. Look at the higher examples and
try to emulate them without wanting any harm for them.
4. Wickedness - some people are just evil. Its a Satanic thing.

How to Remedy Envy: specific diagnoses
1. Consider your priorities. What is it that you want in the first place? Prioritize !khirah
over dunya and then you will not worry about the *ar!m types of envy.
2. Ignore comparisons
a. Don't allow others to compare you to others and dont compare yourself to
b. Don't foster the practice of comparing in community either.
3. Make dua! for the person - This is the most effective way to get rid of *asad. As soon as
you feel yourself envying a person ask All!h to keep the nimah for the person.
Sincerely ask All!h to bless that person and this will do away with the envy.
4. Remember that Alla!h is the Provider - as long as you understand All!h is the Provider,
you will not question qadr. All!h has a plan for each person individually

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Do they allot the portions of their Lord? It is We who have apportioned among them their
livelihood in the life of this world (al-Zukhruf: 32)

Everyone has their way to get to Jannah. Imagine if Umm Maryam had this mentality, look at
those people, how come they have sons, and I have a daughter? But she didnt think like that.
She realized and acknowledged that the man is not like a woman, yet look at how Maryam As
was raised.

The poor 'a&!bah came to the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) and said, Ya Ras%lull!h,
the rich companions have taken all of the reward. They pray like we pray and fast like we fast.
They have money and can spend it for the sake of All!h, and we dont have any money. The
Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said Hasnt All!h given you something that you can
give charity with? Every tasb#& is a 'adaqah. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam)
taught them to say sub&!nAll!h, al&amdulill!h, All!hu akbar after the 'al!h. The poor 'a&!bah
came back complaining, The rich 'a&!bah found out about the tasb#& and are doing that
too. nThe Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) smiled and said, That is the bounty of All!h,
and He gives it to whom He wills. If a person is given all of the wealth and it doesnt distract
him and he spends it for the !khirah, then he is a person you should envy. This is an envy that
stirs up healthy competition and not an envy that harms them.

The Prophet [PBUH] said, "He who eats seven Ajwa dates every morning, will not be affected
by poison or magic on the day he eats them." There is no such thing as wearing something to
do away with hasad; nothing at all, such as wearing Qur)!n on paper around your neck.

Read Qur)!n on yourself and have your spouse read Qur)!n on you. You dont have to go to a
shaykh. Did Abu Bakr have people keep coming to him all the time to ask him to read ruqya on
them? Read Qur)!n, pray, and make du! to All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) and insh!All!h you
will be protected from these things. Never allow yourself to think who did it to me? because
then you allow yourself to fall into the sin of suspicion.

When Shay#!n vows to lead people astray, he mentions that he will lead the human beings to
cut off the rabbits ear and believe that the rabbit ear hanging on their neck has certain powers.
Shay#!n knew this will destroy the foundations of faith and belief in qadr. The rabbit will
proceed to become an idol and it will eventually lead them to shirk.

2.3.16 Anger / al-Gha(ab
1. Destructive characteristics and impact of anger
2. Evidence from Sunnah about the importance of avoiding anger
3. Levels of anger: Excessiveness, Negligence (Deficiency of Anger), Moderation
4. Dealing with anger: Doing what is prohibited, fair and equal retaliation, forbearance
5. Levels of forbearance: Withholding, Forgiveness, and Extending Kindness
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Narrated Abu Hurayrah: Alla!hs Apostle said, The strong is not the one who overcomes the
people by his strength, but the strong is the one who yamiliku himself while in anger. If you
let Shay#!n in the driver seat you will say things youve said before and do things you will
regret later. Prophet said yamiku, the one who owns his anger not simply controls his anger.

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Restraining your anger (forbearance) is
through practicing forbearance. You learn forbearance through practice. The same way
you learn knowledge is the same way you learn to control your temper. Learn hulm; having
that quality is truly honor, i3zza and victory. You can learn to deal with your anger; you
wouldnt get angry over the duniya if you didnt love it.

Im!m Ibn al-Qayyim said in al-Faw!id, When you shield yourself from the arrows of the
enemy, not only are you not harmed by your enemy, but your enemy wasted arrows.
Learn hulm, having that quality is truly honor, izza.

Once the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was sitting with Abu Bakr and a group of
people were insulting them. After the third time, Abu Bakr stood up and started arguing
back. Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) got up and left. Abu Bakr said, Are you angry
with me, ya Ras%lull!h? He ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, An angel came down from
heaven and was rejecting what he had said to you. And when you took revenge, a Shay"!n
came down and the angel left and I didnt want to be in the presence of a Shay"!n. You dont
own yourself anymore when you start to get angry. The Shay#!n does the talking for you.

Usually when a person gets higher in status, they put up with less from people. As for
Rasulullah ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) the more he became established, more hulm the people
saw from him.

Anas b. M!lik said, I was walking with the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) while he
was wearing a nice garment. A bedouin pulled it off of him and left marks on his neck. The
Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) turned to him and smiled and gave him more.

Indeed, Abraham was forbearing, grieving and [frequently] returning [to All!h]. (H%d: 75)
He was halim, but that didnt mean he wasnt hurting (awawh). He just took his problems to
All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) (muneeb). SubhanAll!h, it shows the humanness of the prophets
and the balance they had. They wanted to be elevated in the sight of All!h (sub*!nahu wa

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Whenever the Jews of Mad&nah would say sal!m to him, the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam) would say wa alaykum. According to most scholars including Im!m Uthaym&n, you
should give a Christian or Jew the exact same greeting back to him. All!h (sub&!nahu wa
ta!la) says in the Qur)!n that if you are given a greeting, then respond to it equal or greater.
The reason the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said this is because the Jews of Mad&nah
would say al-s!malaykum, which means may the curse of All!h be upon you. Once the
Prophet ('allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was walking with (ishah (ra(yAll!hu anha) and
someone said, al-s!m alaykum, and (ishah said, May the curse of All!h be upon you and
His damnation and anger. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) told her to calm
down and that All!h did not send them with this. She said, Ya Ras%lull!h, did you hear what
they said? He said, Yes. And did you hear how I responded? All!h loves gentleness with all

Some sahabas excelled in hulm. Hassan (RA) had a slave and he asked the slave to pour him a
glass of water. The slave dropped the jug, which fell on his foot. The slave sees that Hassan
(RA) is upset, as is only expected. In order to diffuse the situation, the slave quotes part of the
above ayah, who swallow anger and then Hassan says immediately I swallowed my anger.
So the slave thinks that this is as good of an opportunity as ever, and the slave continues to the
next part of the ayah and says who forgive people and then Hassan said to the slave, I
forgive you. The slave persists and completes the ayah, telling Hassan (RA) that All!h loves
those who do good to others (also a meaning of ihsan). And then Hassan said Go, youre

Understand how beloved al-&ulm is to All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la). The Prophet ("allall!hu
alayhi wa sallam) said to al-Ashajj b. Abdl-Qays: You have two qualities that All!h the
Almighty loves: forbearance and patience. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) went to
him and said, You have two qualities that All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la) loves: al-&ulm and al-
an! (taking your time making sure things are in order, not being hasty). One time, a group of
people said they knew how to get A*mad b. Abdl-Qays angry because he loved his mom a lot.
They sent someone who said, I want to marry your mother. A*mad ibn Abdl- Qays said,
Jaz!kall!hu khayran for your interest, but you are a young man and have your whole life in
front of you, but my mother is old. By the way, tell your companions you were not able to make
me angry!

Abu Hurayrah relates that a man said to the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam): Counsel
me. The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Do not get angry. The man repeated his
request many times, but the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) kept saying: Do not get
angry. (al- Bukha!ri)

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

The only permissible type of anger is to get angry for All!h. Anas said, The Prophet
('allall!hualayhi wa sallam) never became angry for himself. If the boundaries of All!h were
crossed, then he would become angry for All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la). If you are angry, ask
yourself why you are angry. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) did get angry but only
when the boundaries of All!h are crossed. Even if your anger is for All!h, you have to
channel it in the right way. Channel your anger in the proper way. Even when the Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) got angry for All!h, he did not allow it to control him. Repel
evil with that which is better.

All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la) admonished the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) in S%rah
Abasa because Ibn Abi Makhtoum, a blind man, came to the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam) while he had the attention of the leaders of the Quraysh. This blind man was running
and kicking up the dirt and saying, Teach me from what All!h has taught you! He
didnt know that Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was talking to the Quraysh. The
Qurayshs problem was that they felt they were better than the poor 'a&!bah. This man
comes and yells in this way, and the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) did abasa, which
indicates the two lines on your forehead when you make the slightest frown possible. That is
all the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) did at a blind man who didnt even see him.
All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la) held the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) to a standard and
told him to not show even those two lines on his face. You suppress it and swallow it.

While Umar b. Abdul-Az&z was the khal#fah, he tripped over someone, and the man said,
Are you majn%n (crazy)? Umar b. Abdul-Az&z said, No, and kept walking. The guards
went to the man and were going to take care of him, and Umar said to the guards, What
are you doing? He asked a question, and I answered his question.

Some Causes of Anger
! Self-admiration
" Arrogance, expecting others to treat you a certain way
! Inappropriate joking
" Sometimes its out of mockery
! Argumentation
! Betrayal

Practical Measures:

1. Make Wudu. If you do this, you will not have the same amount of anger. There is
scientific proof. When you are angry, you heat up physically, and when you put cold
water on you, then you calm down.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

2. Say a%dhu bill!hi min al-shay"!nl-raj#m. It will remind us of the attributes of All!h
that He hears and He is knowledgeable. When the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam) saw someone angry one time, he didnt tell him to say the isti!dhah because he
knew that sometimes the worst thing to do is remind them while angry. The Prophet
('allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) told the other 'a&!bah, I know a word that if he would say
it, it would do away with his anger: a%dhu bill!hi min al-shay"!nl-raj#m. Its a really
bad idea to tell people what to do when angry. Do it afterwards. Shaykh shared an
experience where a husband and wife were cursing each other in tawaaf and eventually
divorced in tawaaf. Let them finish and give them future advice.
3. Change Position. The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, If you are angry and
standing up, then sit down. If you are still angry while sitting, then lay down. This
withdraws you from acting on the emotion. We have sufficient ways in the sunnah to
deal with anger. Remove yourself from confrontation, it naturally takes you away from
getting angry.

All of this serves one purpose: do not act while you are angry.

Don't EVER write, email, text. tweet, update facebook status, etc when you are angry. Just in
the nature of writing, you become a coward and you can write things and you would not be able
to say outloud. Got a problem with someone? Meet up with them; dont write it out and try to
it solve that way. Let it sit for 24 hours then write it if you really have to. When you are
reading an email, you imagine a person in your face yelling; you imagine the worst possible
tone. You read into it the way you want to read it when it is written down, that way it hurts
more and it is a recurring sayyiaat every time they read it.

If the shaykh could give a fatwa on this he would say, Its haram to write an email about a
serious issues, makrooh to talk about them over the phone, and its mustahab to do it in

Shaytan always tries to make you do things in haste, so you can ruin your life and your
relationships. He wants you to act in the moment of anger when you are not thinking clearly.
Shaytaan provides a disguise for you. Ibn al-Qayyim said, Whenever you are angry, look at
yourself in the mirror. You will be disgusted with yourself. Its important that you do things
that physically and spiritually calm you down when you are angry.

Whenever you see a person there is more rahmah. Any time you have a serious issue, say like a
board issue, you call the brother and say let us meet at isha and this will automatically take off
half of the heat.

Abu Dharr (ra(yAll!hu anhu) told a servant to bring a sheep, and he brought the sheep but
broke the sheeps leg. He asked, Why did you do that? The servant said, I did it to make
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

you mad. Abu Dharr said, Im going to anger the one who told you to make me mad [the
Shay"!n] and let you go free.

Sometimes protesting takes away from the issue and it consumes your anger. Protesting is an
effective tool, but it does not replace dua. There is problem when someone goes out protests
and thinks just because they have yelled, Free Palestine they have freed Palestine. It relieves
some pressure, but doesnt replace a propers ways to direct our anger.
2.3.17 Learning Forbearance

Ibn 'Abbas reported that the Messenger of All!h said to Ashajj 'Abdu'l-Qays, "You have two
qualities which All!h loves: forbearance and steadiness."

! Alla!h is Al-H!ali!m
! How do I acquire H!ulm?
! How am I able to gain the attribute of H!ulm?
! The Example of Prophet Muh!ammad (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam)

Anas b. Ma!lik narrated: I was walking with the Messenger of Alla!h and he was wearing a
mantle of Najra!n with a thick border. A rude bedouin met him and pulled the mantle so
violently that I saw this violent pulling had left marks from its border on the skin of the neck
of the Messenger of Alla!h. And he (the bedouin) said: Muh!ammad! Command that I should be
given out of the wealth of Alla!h, which is at your disposal. The Messenger of Alla!h turned to
him and smiled, and then he ordered for him a provision. (al-Bukha!ri)

The Example of Ibra!hi!m (alayhil-sala!m)

Indeed, Abraham was forbearing, grieving and [frequently] returning [to Alla!h]. (Hu!d: 75)

The True Meaning of Forgiving Others and Not Holding Grudges

...but whoever pardons and makes reconciliation -his reward is [due] from Alla!h. (al-Shu!ra: 40)
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, ... and Alla!h does not increase a servant (of
His), as a result of his forgiveness, except in glory. (al-Trimidhi)

Abu Hurayrah (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) reported: The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said,
May he be miserable, the worshipper of the di!na!r and dirham, and the worshipper of the dinar
and dirham, and the worshipper of the striped silk cloak. If he is given anything, he is satisfied;
but if not, he is unsatisfied. (Al-Bukhari)

By Him in Whose Hand is my soul, no servant (of Alla!h) truly believes unless he loves for his
brother what he loves for himself. (al-Bukha!ri & Muslim)

Learn about the virtues of forgiveness and forbearance
1. Surah Araf:199- Take what is given freely, enjoin what is good, and turn away from
the ignorant.

2. Remember the Anger of Alla!h
3. Think about the consequences of your temper in this world
4. Always carry an invisible mirror with you to see how you look when your angry
5. Try to identify the causes of your anger
6. Remember that everything that happens is by the will of Alla!h

2.3.18 Greed and Miserliness

Again the root cause of this problem is loving the duniyaa too much. The Prophet ('allall!hu
alayhi wa sallam) said, If the son of (dam was to be given a valley of gold, then he would
seek with it another valley of gold. If he has two valleys of gold, then he would want
another. Nothing would satisfy him except for the dirt in his mouth.

All!h says in Surah At-Takathur:

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

The mutual rivalry for piling up (the good things of this world) diverts you (from the more
serious things) (1).

When a person is so business minded and consistently wants more and more, it is a path for
him getting destroyed. So many CEOs, celebrities, athletes and other people we look up to
end up committing suicide.

In Surah Al-Hadid All!h says,

Know that the life of this world is only play and amusement, pomp and mutual
boasting among you, and rivalry in respect of wealth and children, as the
likeness of vegetation after rain, thereof the growth is pleasing to the tiller;
afterwards it dries up and you see it turning yellow; then it becomes straw. But
in the Hereafter (there is) a severe torment (for the disbelievers, evil-doers), and
(there is) Forgiveness from All!h and (His) Good Pleasure (for the believers,
good-doers), whereas the life of this world is only a deceiving enjoyment.

The farmer became happy to see his tree grow after the beneficial rain. The leaves then turned
yellow and he sees it as yellow. This is because the craving of abundance gets to you every
time you reach another goal. You are not happy. Abundance is torture. Everything you get
you will see it as yellow.

A way to remedy this: At beginning of year always set a goal of how much you want to save.
Give the rest to sadaqa. When you dont have goals, your desire to accumulate money will
increase and that kills your spirituality.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Take cars as an example. A ca comes out that is extremely beautiful. The next year same car
comes out but the lights move a little differently or the rims are little bigger. All of a
sudden what you own is not good enough. Same with iPhones. You get what you get and
then you want the next one.

Many books written on why people are least happy in this generation, despite all of the
advancements we have. The reason is because people mistake happiness for abundance.
They forget that that the key component of happiness is achievement. You set milestones
that are not crazy and are achievable. Attain them and move on.

The shaykh dislikes desi/arab weddings. They waste a lot of money on this. There are high
mahrs and competition to outdo others. The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, The
smaller the mahr the more blessing there is in it.

In our society the more someone has, the more unsatisfied they become. Someone has nicer
house than you so you want to build a bigger house. You work extra hours at work to pay off
for the house. Two weeks later the house does not feel the same. No, it turned yellow.

Dont allow yourself to get caught up in pursuit of dunya. It destroys you and it kills your
spirituality. All!h said this 1400 years ago but we see the same principles reverbrating in
modern books. An author writes that the 3 keys to happiness are, When you have something
to do, something to love, and something work for. Doesnt this remind of you the Qur)!n? In
Surat alImran All!h says, And hasten to forgiveness from your Lord; and a Garden, the
extensiveness of which is (as) the heavens and the earth, it is prepared for those who guard
(against evil) (3:133). Rush (something to do), toward forgiveness (something to love), and
Garden (something to work for).

In Palestinian culture, there is a j!hiliyy tradition in the wedding of dressing the woman with
the gold purchased for her. Then they complain that someone put ayn on her. They shouldnt
show it off to people. This tradition is from the tradition of j!hiliyyah. The Quraysh would
dress the woman with the gold purchased for her.

The Shaykh share his personal mahr story. His wife asked for a 100 grand and a dollar as her
mahr. It was a joke however, she was referring the chocolate 100 grand and $1. SubhanAll!h.

In S%ratl-Ar!f, All!h says, And if only the people would have believed and had faith, We
would have opened the barak!t (blessings) of the heavens and the earth. The Prophet
(s!allalla!hualayhi wa sallam) used to say, And make my house expansive. He (s!allalla!hu
alayhi wa sallam). He chose to live in an apartment so small that he had to ask A!ishah to
move his legs so he could pray qiya!m. When he ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, And make
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

my home expansive, he was asking All!h to make him feel that his house is expansive. He
was asking for barakah in what he had. Some people are given very little and are satisfied and
content, and another is given ten times that and is not content.

All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la) teaches us some important lessons. There is a difference between
having blessing in something and having something. In S%ratl-An!m, All!h says,
Whenever they forgot that which they are reminded of [i.e. All!h sent them hardship, a test
to wake them up but they did not wake up] We open for them the doors of all good [in the
sense of dunya]. We gave it all to them until they became pleased with what they had. We
snatched it suddenly and they are left in utter despair. The dunya was a punishment for
them. Sometimes All!h punishes a person with dunya. Having a lot is the greatest
punishment for you if you are not grateful because you hang your hopes on dunya. And that
is the norm and this is why we celebrities that are so chronically depressed.

Be satisfied with your situation and ask All!h for barakah in what He gave you. Ask to have
more in less. See it as a lot even though it may be little.
hink about death

A#a said, There are three benefits to remembering death. You are satisfied with little. You
hasten to repent. You do not compete with the people of dunya over their dunya (you feel
satisfied). It can be a true punishment when you are attached and feel grief and feel a sense
of entitlement to the good in your life. When you have your priorities right and All!h puts
barakah in it.

Would you sell your arm for 2 million dollars? How about your eyesight? Your hearing? If you
add up all the things you have you would not give away for any amount, you will see yourself
as a millionaire.

We saw through hurricane Katrina how fitnah brings out either the ugliness or goodness of
people - some came back to the masjid while others became worse in their deeds. There was a
video of a woman (non-Muslim) with a 2 year old and she was smiling and saying, This is the
greatest day of my life standing in front of the destroyed house. She thought she had lost her
duaghter and until that day she ever appreciated the value of her daughter until today. As long
as you are always behind the duniya, you are always distraught and disturbed.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Beautified for people is the love of that which they desire - of women and sons, heaped-up
sums of gold and silver, fine branded horses, and cattle and tilled land. That is the enjoyment of
worldly life, but Alla!h has with Him the best return. (a!le-Imra!n: 14)

The Messenger of Alla!h (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, The likeness of this worldly life in
the Hereafter is as the likeness of what any of you (gets when he) puts his finger into the sea; so
let him see that which he gets! (al-Bukha!ri & Muslim)

! As Sadaqah - If the ummah paid its zakah, there wouldnt be any poor people.
! Set a financial goal that is reasonable. Everyrhing beyond what you had ahchieved to
save goes to sadaqa. This will also keep you from not monitoring your bank account
every single moment.
2.3.19 Curbing the Desire for Food and Sex (shahwul batan wal fahsh)

This is very serious and significant as it has a direct implication on spirituality.

All!h gave us halal options. Abdulla!h b. Masu!d said, If I had ten days left to live and I knew I
would die at the end of them and if I had time to get married, I would still get married. In this
day and age we make it very hard for the youth to get married and we make haram what All!h
has made halal.

Ima!m Ibn al-Qayyim said, One of the worst desires a person can have is excess in food. This is
what got A!dam out of Paradise in the first place, and this is what stimulates the desire for
wealth and it also stimulates the desire for intimacy.

In the books of tazkiyah, it is condemned to overeat. Im!m Ibn al-Qayyim said, One of the
worst desires a person can have is excess in food. This is what got (dam out of Paradise in the
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first place, and this is what stimulates the desire for wealth and it also stimulates the desire for
intimacy. Ibn Qud!mah said that people who have a larger appetite for food have a larger
sexual appetite. A person should not eat in excess.

Ibn Umar reported All!hs Messenger ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) as saying that a non-
Muslim eats in seven intestines whereas a Muslim eats in one intestine. (Muslim)
The context of this &ad#th: There was a man who was not Muslim who drank milk from
seven different animals because he wasnt getting full. The next day he became Muslim and
only drank one cup of milk and was satisfied. This is what the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam) was talking about. Im!m al-Nawawi explains this &ad#th and says: Whenever you are
focused on the hereafter, you naturally become somewhat distracted from the dunya.

The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, The son of A!dam has not filled a worse vessel
than the stomach. It is enough for him to eat enough to hold his posture. This means that you
eat to function. It is okay to enjoy good food, but dont overeat.

The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, If one must eat, he should leave 1/3rd for food,
1/3rd for drink, and 1/3rd for air. This is one of the most scientifically accurate ah!adi!th. The
gas bubble in the stomach occupies 34% of the stomach. If you infringe on the gas bubble, then
you suffer from indigestion.

Imam Hasan al Basri was once told him by someone, I am full. He replied, Should any
believer do that to himself? We can our desire our food by by decreasing your portions.
Crash dieting doesn't work. After the diet you just gain back more than what you lost. The
sunnah is to eat in portions. Shaykh lost 75 pounds through this method.

Imam ibn Qudamah said, Being overweight doesnt mean that you indulge. Being thin does
not make you healthy or mean that you dont indulge.

Fill yourself to a point where you are satisfied and function. Ibn Qud!mah said, You eat too
much so you sleep too much so you worship too little.

Abu M%sa al-Ashari was told that he doesnt eat enough, and he said, The horses that always
win the race are the lean ones. When you want to train a horse, you feed the horse well. The
next day you barely feed them. The next day you feed them something small but nutritious.
Tufayl ibn Amr was nicknamed ABu Batn- was known as the guy who had adheem al batan
Amr ibn al Aas? - Adheem al batan

A scholar said, In order to be disciplined in anything, you have to be disciplined in
everything. It is easier to pray qiyaam al layl when you are healthy. Hajj is easy when one is
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healthy. You are not going to be disciplined with your salah if you are not disciplined with your

The Prophet ('allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was someone very healthy. His stomach did not pop
out and he did work out. If a person is sitting and food is being presented, he should not
condemn others or depress people or tell them that they are overeating. They should be kind
to the host and still eat their portions. Eat in moderation. If you are healthy physically, watch
what it does to your spirituality. You can do so much more when you are used to less.

Sexual Appetite:
Islam has put in many internal checks, including marriage and fasting. Islam forbids being
alone with a nonmahram. It doesnt matter who you think he/she. Even if you think of them
as a brother/sister.

Just take a take look at this video, Why guys and girls cant be friends. Its a neutral, not
religious experiment on a college campus.

There are men and women who can be completely around each other and not be indecent. But
they are the exceptions not the norm. In Islam rule of law is not for exception, but for the

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, The brother-in-law is Death. Why? Because
people get relaxed around the in-laws and family. Dont ignore the rules whether he be your
cousin or any other family member. Respect the internal checks.

Also make it easy for people to get married young. Islam encourages intimacy within marriage.
Spouses cannot deny each other. They are encouraged to look good for each other and dress up
for each other. Islam encourages a healthy relationship so people dont have to look on the
outside. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) taught us that even when a person cannot
be entirely intimate, they should have levels of intimacy. Having those displays of affection is
necessary so a person can be satisfied and so they dont look beyond that.

Khalwah is not just two people being together in a room or car. There is such a thing as
cyber-khalwah like Gchat. Shay"!n plays with people. Always cc when in doubt. Dont get too
comfortable. If you wouldnt write it if other people saw it, then dont write it.

Imam al-Ghazali says, If someone in particular triggers your thoughts and you cannot get
married to them, being even around them is haraam even when you are not secluded with
them. Islam stops it at the very root.

Why do we have sexual deviance? The reason why people are not satisfied is because we see
a lot of weird, lavish things in public and its harmful to society. Take care of desiring food
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and sex too much. You are supposed to desire them, but channel them in the right way. Ibn
Taymiyyah said, Not a single person from the time of the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa
sallam) to my time (~600 years) was ever stoned for committing adultery. In order to have
that crime, you have to be married and have four trustworthy witnesses at the same time see
everything. Ibn Taymiyyah said, If a few people saw two people committing zina, he is
supposed to close his eyes and walk away (not get more people). It worked because no one
ever did it.
2.3.20 The Wandering Gaze (ghaddul Basar)

The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Do not follow one look with another look.
The second one is on you and the second one is against you. This doesnt mean that you can
keep on staring the first time! (YOLO-You only look once). Prophet saw dealt the with youth
in very compassionate way. When he saw a couple of young men staring at women, he simply
took their head and turned them with a smile on his face. This also doesnt mean that you have
to keep looking down all the time. Look over peoples shoulders, look around, but dont focus
on a person. Dont act like sisters are aliens in masjid and outside act very laxed.

Lowering your gaze applies to sisters as well. Ibn Abi Makhtoum was with Ras%lull!h
('allall!hualayhi wa sallam), and they were sitting with the wives of the Prophet ("allall!hu
alayhi wa sallam) who were not properly covered. They said, Ya Ras%lull!h, he is blind. He
said, Are you blind too? Celebrity crush is wrong also.

Imagine being watched

Tell the believing men to reduce [some] of their vision and guard their private parts. That is
purer for them. Indeed, Alla!h is Acquainted with what they do. (al-Nu!r: 30)

All!h knows the fraud of the eyes, and all that the breasts conceal (Gh!fir:19)
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What is the betrayal of the eyes? Abdull!h b. +Abb!s explains this verse. He says, A man is
with a group of people when a woman passes by, and he shows them that he has lowered his
gaze, but when they are not paying attention, he looks.

Dont be a hypocrite. If you see the sister in public you look down but on facebook staring at
her profile picture. If its not okay in person then its not okay on social media!

Careful what you post online, you never know who might be staring at it; its not just a matter
of halal and haram. Modesty applies to men and women. Let your heart be your discretion.

Shaykh is working on a project and needs help from IT professionals: HalalifyYourWeb

Keep your eyes on the prize, Jannah

Ibra!hi!m b. Adham was asked by a man how to lower his gaze. He told the man that he needed
a bowl of milk delivered to a place. The man delivered it. Ibra!hi!m asked him, Did you see the
house we passed by? Did you see the market you passed by? The man said, No. If your eyes
are on the prize, then you dont pay attention to what is around you. It may sacrifice your
Jannah, so you lower your gaze. Remember Jannah whenever it happens.

Breaking the Habit of Sin:
! Preventing the sin is better than treatment
! Using ibadah and positive action as treatment
! Countering Desires with patience
! Countering heedlessness with knowledge

The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, All children of A!dam are sinners, and the best
sinners are those who repent. (al-Tirmidhi) kulli adamu khatta

Three men complained to al-H!usayn. One man said, We dont have any rain. He
said, Stop sinning. Another said, We are not blessed with children. He said, Work on
your sins. The third said, We are struggling with poverty. He said, Work on your sins. He
was asked why he told this to each of them and said, Alla!h said in the Qur)a!n that when Nu!h!
complained to his Lord, Nu!h! said to them, Seek the forgiveness of your Lord. Verily He is the
most forgiving. He would send upon you beneficial rain and give you money and give you
children and grant you gardens and waterfalls. There is a direct correlation between sins and
being deprived.

Ascribe the bad things that happen in your life to sin. Even if they are not from sin, it will
cause you to be more vigilant in rooting out those causes, especially when it comes to your
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All!h said in the Qur)!n that when N%* complained to his Lord, N%* said to them, Seek the
forgiveness of your Lord. Verily He is the most forgiving. He would send upon you beneficial
rain and give you money and give you children and grant you gardens and waterfalls. Make
sure your repentance is a sincere one.

Abu Mihjan was one of the companions of the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) He was
suffering from an addiction to drinking wine. He was brought and flogged, then brought and
flogged again, but he knew that this problem did not relieve him of his duty to strive for the
cause of Islam. So he went out with the Muslims to al-Qaadisiyyah as a soldier, seeking
martyrdom on the battlefield. In al-Qaadisiyyah he was brought to the commander of the army,
Sad ibn Abi Waqqaas, for having drunk wine. Sad detained him so that the Muslims ranks
would be cleansed of such a person. This detention was a harsh punishment which caused Abu
Mihjan a great deal of anguish. When he heard the sounds of swords and spears, and the
neighing of the horses, and he knew that the jihad had begun, and the gates of Paradise were
open, he was filled with longing for jihad. He called to the wife of Sad ibn Abi Waaqqas saying,
Let me go and I promise Allaah that if I come back safe and sound, I will put my own feet in
the chains, and if I am killed, then you will be rid of me. She felt sorry for him, so she let him
go. He fought very bravely and everyone was wondering who he was as he had his face covered.
When the battle was over, Abu Mihjan went back and put his feet in the chains. When Sad
found out he himself went to this wine-drinker, released the chains with his own hands and
said, Get up, for by Allaah I will never flog you for drinking wine again. Abu Mihjan said, By
Allaah, I will never drink it again.

All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) covers you the first time. A s!riq is someone who can steal
something of value that is hidden without the owner even knowing about it a skilled thief.
If you see someone take something, then he is not a s!riq. A s!riq was brought to Umar b.
Al- Kha##!b. When the punishment was going to be taken, he said to Umar b. Al-Kha##!b,
This is my first time! Umar said, No it is not. All!h always covers you up the first time.
After his hand was cut, the man came to Umar and said, I have stolen 21 times. All!h
covers, shelters, and shields you the first time. He (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) gives you an
opportunity to come back to Him.

Secret sin or public sin, which sin worse?
Public sin is worse, because boasting about a sin is worse than just sinning.

But for spirituality secret sins are worse. It shows weakness of your faith in All!h as only
people are preventing you from doing the sins in public.

Ima!m al-H!asan al-Bas!ri said, If there is a thief who is robbing a house and hears the
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doorknob rattle, he will hide. At that moment, he committed a form of shirk because
Alla!h was watching him the whole time and he felt no shame. When he thought that
someone may see him, then he felt ashamed of himself.

Respect the sight of All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la). If you feel All!h doesnt even see you thats a
sign you are a mushrik. And if you know he is watching why do you make him the lowest of

A Man from Bani Israeel was about to rape a woman and he said, Dont worry, no one sees us
except the stars. She said, Where is the maker of the stars? He is watching us.

If we feel no shame whatsoever committing the sin in private and in public, we have a
serious disease. Hudhayfah ibn Yaman was asked, What was the difference between the
hypocrite of the time of the Prophet and his time? He said, The hypocrites of time of
Prophet used to hide their sins but not anymore.

If you can go to someone who can help and you tell them about the sin then it is not

Remember, every sin is worse than its expression. Abu Huraira said that the Messenger of
All!h (sallAll!hu Alaihi wasalam) said: Riba is of seventy different kinds, the least grave
being equivalent to a man marrying (i.e. having sexual intercourse with) his own mother.
Just because we have become desensitized to it doesnt make it okay. Our sight should be
with All!h (sub*!nahu wa ta!la) and what he made known to us.

Sufya!n al-Thawri said, Making istighfa!r is more important than making tasbi!h!. If you have a
stain on a garment, the priority is to clean the stain and not to accessorize more. An ounce of
prevention is better than a pound of cure.

Ima!m ibn al-Qayyim said, Every single action manifests itself through the following process:
First the action is a fatara (passing thought). Then you start to entertain the thought and it
becomes a settled thought. If you entertain the thought long enough, then it becomes niyyah
(an intention) to commit the deed. Then you become determined to do it (azi!mah). (Once we
make the intention, we have a certain level of determination.) Then it becomes amal (action, an
actual deed). After it manifests itself as an actual deed, it become a habit. It is then a sin that
defines you and is part of your life.

Ima!m ibn al-Qayyim said, The greatest punishment of a sin is that Alla!h allows you to sin
again. Ibn Quda!mah said, It is like a farmer who sees a tree growing which is harmful and
has weeds and then decides to come back later to take care of it.

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What happens to a tree when it grows? It grows inwardly and deeper. The longer you
allow it to drag on, the more hurt you get out of it. You are allowing sin to grow deeper
and you lose fitrah.

A sister stopped wearing h!ija!b just to take revenge on her father. The first day she went to the
university without h!ija!b, she felt so uncomfortable that she wore a hoodie. A few weeks later,
she took it off. It became normal. The heart becomes hard and you become desensitized to the
sin and it is no longer a big deal. Ima!m ibn al-Qayyim said, The greatest punishment of a sin is
that Alla!h allows you to sin again. You become further desensitized each time you sin.
Shaytaan gets you to think backwards, Why should I fast if I dont even pray? You want to
progress not go backwards.

The Sources

Treat sin the way you would treat any other drug rehab. If a person walks and he falls down
what is the first thing he does? He looks to see what caused him to fall down. When a person
commits a sin or trait that is not praiseworthy they need to analyze what gave birth to this.

1. Where was I when I first committed this sin? Environment, setting, who was your
company, etc.
2. When did I first do it?
3. Did anyone encourage me to commit this sin directly or indirectly?
When society becomes corrupt, then the standards of what is ethical become completely
blurred. Look at your environment and your close friends.
4. What was the primary intended goal of committing the sin?
Whenever you do something, you do it for a reason. You thought the sin was going to
make you happy, which is why you did it in the first place. You were not patient with
All!h. Ask yourself: what was the intention behind the sin and was the goal achieved?
Motives like pride are harder to get rid off than desire.
5. Was that goal achieved?
Most people are more miserable in their lives, they never got that peace they would get
from committing that sin. People after committing sins are more miserable. They have
lots of turmoil, less peace
6. What are some of the possible secondary factors?
What else contributed to the problem?

The Action

1. Was this sin committed using any tool or medium?
Facebook, CD Player, Phone, Business Location
2. If so, is this tool a necessity in my life?
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3. Did I feel any guilt after committing this sin the first time?
How desensitized are you? How did you feel after the first time? Did any friends praise the
sin or encourage you to repeat it? The first time you do something your fitrah says this is
wrong, but slowly you become comfortable with it.
4. Did any of my friends praise this sin or encourage me to repeat it?
If losers surround you, you lower your own standards, vice versa.

Post-Sin Feelings
1. How many times did I repeat this action?
2. How often do I put myself in unnecessary contact with an environment conducive to
committing it?
There is a saying in drug rehab: If you are an alcoholic, then dont play pool in a bar. You are
exposing yourself to contact with the bar, and it is inviting you to it.
3. Did anything bad happen to me after the sin (even if unrelated to the act itself)? Ascribe
what happened to the sin itself.
4. Did anyone I was trying to hide the sin from catch me in the act? If so, how did it make
me feel? Are you shameful in front of people and not in front of All!h?
5. Did I sacrifice any acts of worship as a result of the sin?
(i.e. Listening to music instead of Qur!n, going to a party instead of the masjid)
It is a trillion dollar industry. It is so harmful that it kills time, it kills salah. Its a drug. A
study said that pornography alters chemicals in the brain the same way a drug does. People
sacrifice acts of worship. Anything that takes you away from All!h is not good for you.

Game Plan
1. Imagine having to stand in front of Alla!h and watch the sin being committed in front
me, then having to explain it.

Lets say your mother had a hidden camera that recorded you committing the sin and
then made you watch it with her and explain the sin. How much worse is this than her
just having knowledge of it? On the Day of Judgment, you will see it all in instant replay. You
will have to watch the replay with Alla!h (subh!a!nahu wa taa!la) and answer for it. You are
observing All!h and All!h is observing you.

2. Imagine having to be burned by a fire for every time I commit the sin.
Umar khattab would consistently put his hand next to fire and say, Can you handle it O
3. Pray two rakahs and sincerely seek forgiveness from Alla!h.
Make your tawbah an event; document the day. Dont just cry but repent and change course.
Even Shay#!n cried; thats not enough. Al-$asan al-Ba"ri said, The one who is truly fearful
of All!h is not the one who cries and wipes his tears but he is the one who leaves the things
that cause him to be fearful in the first place.
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4. Ask Alla!h to grant me the strength to deal with the withdrawal symptoms of the sin.

When you leave things, you may become an outcast. You will have withdrawal symptoms when
you leave the sin. The effects are not necessarily a manifestation of Alla!hs anger on you. Alla!h
accepted A!dams repentance, but A!dam had consequences for his sin and had to leave Jannah.
You will face consequences whenever you withdraw yourself from these things, but ask Alla!h
to help you deal with it. Take those withdrawal symptoms as a source of purification.
5. Make a commitment to never return to that sin again.
6. Seek forgiveness from the people I hurt with this sin (if applicable).
7. Designate a self-enforced punishment for myself if I do it again to act as a deterrent.
Soap in the mouth is one of the most effective ways to deal with cursing. It is a deterrent.
Punish yourself in ways that dont harm you. It is extremely effective. Deter yourself but dont
harm yourself; deprive of things like self of leisure.
8. Give an act of charity or perform extra prayers to make up for the sin.
Rasu!lulla!h (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Follow up your sin with a good deed and it will
wipe it out. This doesnt mean you can consistently do the same sin and then follow it up with
a good deed. The ultimate sign of your repentance and turning the page is doing a good deed
after a bad deed. Good deeds do away with the sins. For tawbah, make two rak+ahs. Rasu!lulla!h
(s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) legislated it. Physically involve yourself in tawbah and make
yourself feel involved. Do good deeds to show that you have turned the page.
9. Eliminate all mediums that could be used to pull me back into the sin. (i.e. delete phone
numbers, deactivate Facebook account, change email address, put up internet firewalls, break
CDs, take TV out of my room, etc.) Dont tempt yourself. Dont leave the means open for
temptation. Do what you have to do.
10. Look for a permissible alternative to my sin (nicotine gum for smokers, sports,

Ima!m Ibn Quda!mah said, For a person to do something merely permissible to take him
away from something h!ara!m is good and can be rewardable. Keep active. Keep away
from being idle because that is when Shayt!a!n has time to work on you.

11. Disassociate either gradually or immediately from the people who either commit the
same sin or encourage me to do so. This is crucial. If you keep the same company and they
commit that sin or have a behavioral issue, then you will fall back into it. Surround yourself
with good company.
12. Surround myself with people who abhor the sin and will help me refocus.
13. Make a pact with someone in a similar situation to leave that sin for good.
14. Keep my eye on the prize!
Realize if Alla!h doesnt replace what Ive lost with something in this dunya, then He will do so
in Jannah, or even both, insha!Alla!h. Alla!h will give you back more than what you have
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sacrificed. Alla!h says, Whoever isconscious of Me, I will make a way out for him and grant
him from ways that he never expected. Alla!h will make a way out for you, insha!Alla!h.

2.3.21 Breaking the Habit of Sin

Make a pact with someone who is going through the same situation, to get rid of the sin. Keep
your eyes on the prize. Some of the best people are the repenters.

Shaytaans name come Iblees comes from-ablasa. He despairs and digs himself a deeper and
deeper hole. Imam ibn Qayyim said, When iblees managed to get Adam out of jannah, he
thought he won and adam lost, but whenever remember whenever a diver dives into the sea, he
collects pearls. The strongest people are those who repent. And All!h made Adam stronger.
Similarly with Yunus (as), All!h made him a better person. Sin was his catalyst to get back to
All!h. A sin that brings you back to All!h is better than the good deed that it takes away.

Shayt!a!n tells you while you are doing a sin how terrible you are and that Alla!h will not forgive
you and will not have mercy on you. Always leave the door open between you and Alla!h.
Never shut the door between you and all!h. No matter how low you are in life. Abu Bakr, one
of the taba tabii!n, said, Once I was traveling to al-Sha!am with other travelers, and on the way,
we were attacked by thieves. They took everything we had and put it in front of the gang
leader. From the goods was a bag of sugar and some almonds. The thieves began eating in
front of us. Everyone was eating except for the leader, so I asked him why he wasnt eating
anything, and he said he was fasting. I said, How is it that you are a highway robber and steal
peoples property and kill people and are fasting? He said, O shaykh, this is a door that I keep
open between me and Alla!h so that maybe one day I will be able to enter upon Alla!h through
it. Abu Bakr said, After a while, I saw this same person in H!ajj. I asked, Are you who I think
you are? He said, Yes! That fasting that I kept open elevated me to this status, and Alla!h
accepted me through that door so I abandoned all of the other stuff.

Al-Fudayl bin Iyaad was famous for his piety and worship, but he was not always a practicing
Muslim. In his early years, al-Fudayl was an infamous highway robber; he would prowl in
the night for victims on the road from Abiward to Sarakhs. Between these two cities was a
small village in which lived a girl that al-Fudayl was in love with. One night, out of
desperation to be with her, al-Fudayl climbed the wall of her home. As he was climbing over
it, he heard a voice recite:
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Has not the time come for the hearts of those who believe to be affected by All!hs
Reminder? [Qur'an al-Hadeed : 16]

At that moment, al-Fudayl answered, O my Lord, the time has indeed come. He returned
from where he came and sought refuge near a traveling party on the main road. They were
busy engaging in a serious discussion. al-Fudayl heard one of them say, Let us continue our
journey now. Another answered, No, not until the morning, for al-Fudayl is lurking on the
road somewhere out there, just waiting to rob us. Having heard the entire conversation, al-
Fudayl thought to himself, I go around in the night to sin, while a group of Muslims remain
here because they fear me. Indeed i feel that All!h has brought me here to them only so that I
can reform my character. O All!h, I indeed repent to you..

Look at also the story of Malik ibn Dinar, who was drunk police officer, did not engage in
worship and was completely away from deen. He changed his life around completely after the
death of his daughter. He became a long-standing faqih at the masjid of the Prophet ("allall!hu
alayhi wa sallam).

Abdull!h ibn Mubarak was another example. He used to be a party animal, play instruments,
host parties and drink all night. One night, in his sleep he heard a bird say, Has not the time
come for the hearts of those who believe to be affected by the reminder of All!h, and that, which
has been revealed of the truth. After that not only did he change his life around but became a
great scholar of ahadith and fiqh.

Malik ibn Dinar is a humble person whose righteousness is prominent and austerity is well-
known. One day, a thief broke in his house but it was not long until the thief realized he is in a
house that has nothing worthy to steal. He looked around and saw Malik ibn Dinar looking at
him then said, " You came searching for something of a worldly value but could not find
anything. Do you care to possess something of a religious value to benefit you in the
hereafter?" Upon hearing this, the thief drew near him and sat down listening to the teachings
and heart-melting advices that made the man weep in remorse. Then got up and walked with
him to the Masjid to pray Fajr. This caught the people's attention, the noble pious man is
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

walking with the evil low-life thief and so they asked Malik about it. He replied: "He came to
steal from me but instead I stole his heart"

If you have been running away from All!h for last 20 years it will take some time for you to
come back, but it doesnt mean that All!h is not accepting our repentance.

Video: Poem that made Imam Ahmed cry

The Poem that Made Imam Ahmed Cry
If my Lord asks me Have you shyness in disobeying me? You conceal your sins from my
creation and with sins you come to me.
So how will I answer? O woe to me and who shall protect me?
I keep averting my soul with thoughts of hope from time to time.
And I forget what is to come after death and what is to come after I am shrouded.
As if I am guaranteed life (eternally) and that death will not come to me.
And when the severe stupor of death overtakes me who will protect me?
I looked at the faces, is there not from amongst them who will ransom me?
I will be asked regarding what Ive prepared in my life to save me (on the Day of Judgement).
Then how will I answer after Ive neglected my religion.
Woe to me! Did I not hear the Speech of All!h inviting me?
Did I not hear what came in (the chapters of) Qaaf and Yaa Seen?
Did I not hear about the Day of Gathering, the Day of Assemble and the Day of Judgment?
Did I not hear the crier of death inviting me, calling me?
So O my Lord, a slave (turning to you) I have repented so who then shall shelter me?
Except a Lord extensive in forgiveness to the truth He will guide me.
I have come to you (in repentance) so have mercy on me, and make heavy my scales (with
good deeds).
And lighten my account You are the best of who will bring me to account.
Chapter 4: Istiq!mah

When you go through the diseases, you feel helpless. The most praiseworthy quality a
person can have is istiqaamah. The word istiq!mah means: stability, straight,
disciplined, stable, steadfastness, consistent.

One time the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was sitting with Abu Bakr (ra(yAll!hu
anhu), and Abu Bakr said, Ya Ras%lull!h, Im noticing that all of a sudden grey hairs are
appearing in your hair. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) was very youthful looking
and when he passed away at 63 years old, he only had 20 grey hairs. The Prophet ("allall!hu
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

alayhi wa sallam) said, S%rah H%d and its sisters have turned me grey. Towards the end of
the Makkan period, the revelation about the previous prophets came: Y%nus, Maryam, Y%suf,
S%ratl-Anbiy!. The reason was to give the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) some
reinforcement and to look at what the previous prophets went through. This s%rah in
particular had a profound effect on the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam). When Abu
Bakr asked what about S%rah H%d gave him the grey hair, he said the following !yah:

So remain on a right course as you have been commanded, [you] and those who have
turned back with you [to All!h], and do not transgress. Indeed, He is Seeing of what you do.
(H%d: 112)

Istaqim is the right course. Ibn +Abb!s (ra(yAll!hu anhu) said, No verse has ever been revealed
to the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) that was harder than this verse. Why? It was a
command for him to maintain consistency no matter what he went through.

When al-$asan al-Ba"ri would come across this !yah, he would say, O All!h, You are our
Lord so grant us istiq!mah.
2.4.1 The Hardest Task
- In regards to hardship
- In regards to maintaining strength

Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, The likeness of the heart is as the likeness of a
feather that the wind is turning over in the desert.(Ahmad) Whenever you are struck by
tragedy, keep going on course. Do not be like a snake, righteous one moment not the other,
but rather strive to be consistent.

Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) used to make this dua frequently: Ya muqallib al-
qulub, thabbit qalbi ala dinik -O turner of hearts, make my heart firm upon your religion.

Istiq!mah means two things.
1) It comes in regards to hardship. It is hard to keep moving forward when under
oppression or going through tests such as poverty, oppression, being
stricken, challenged in faith. Keep moving forward and dont become diverted.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

2) Maintaining strength. You start something but dont think you can finish or you
look at things as being so big that you dont even try to start. Analysis paralysis is
a disease. It means that you overanalyze everything and render yourself incapable of
doing anything. You say, I want to go study overseas, but you arent even taking
advantage of the local classes in your community. One day I want to do but you
dont do anything.

Abdull!h b. Mas%d said, The example of the believer, unbeliever, and hypocrite is that of
three people who arrive in a valley. One descended and passed through to the other side.
One descended and reached halfway. One of them was at the edge of the valley calling to the
one in the middle saying, Woe to you! Where are you going? The one who reached the
other side called, Come to the One who will save you! The one in the middle called back, I
dont want to die! The man in the middle was looking back and forth. Because he kept
looking back and forth, a flood came and he drowned. The one who made it across the
valley was the believer. The disbeliever stood calling out and died of starvation. The
one in the middle was consistently torn. He wasnt sure if he could be that person who
crosses, and he died before realizing his full potential because he wasnt moving at a gradual
pace. Ibn Mas%d recited !yah 143 in S%ratl-Nis!:

Wavering between them, [belonging] neither to the believers nor to the disbelievers.
And whoever All!h leaves astray - never will you find for him a way. (al-Nis!: 143)

Imaan, faith goes up and down. You are not the same before and after Ramadan
2.4.2 The Most Praiseworthy Task

Have you not considered how Alla!h presents an example, [making] a good word like a good
tree, whose root is firmly fixed and its branches [high] in the sky? It produces its fruit all the
time, by permission of its Lord. And Alla!h presents examples for the people that perhaps they
will be reminded. (Ibrahi!m: 24-25)

2.4.3 Consistency
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

A!ishah reported Alla!hs Messenger as saying, The acts most pleasing to Alla!h are those
which are done continuously, even if they are small. And when A!ishah did any act she did it
continuously. Crash dieting doesn't work, same way spiritual crash dieting doesn't work.

2.4.4 Discipline in ALL Areas

Istiqamah means discipline, it is straight and balanced. Trying to find that in our lives is so
important. Remember you cant have discipline in anything unless you have discipline in
everything. Not in only your 'al!h and siy!m but also with your family relationships. In your
life, in your religion, in your character.
Chapter 5: Moderation: Dont Go to Extremes (Ifr!# and
O children of (dam, take your adornment at every masjid, and eat and drink, but be not
excessive. Indeed, He likes not those who commit excess. (al-Ar!f: 31)

And [they are] those who, when they spend, do so not excessively or sparingly but are ever,
between that, [justly] moderate (al-Furq!n: 67)

The Prophet Mu*ammad ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said: Do good deeds properly,
sincerely and moderately, and worship All!h in the forenoon and in the afternoon and
during a part of the night, and always adopt a middle, moderate, regular course, whereby
you will reach your target (of Paradise). (al-Bukh!ri)

2.5.1 Balance

Narrated Abu Ju*ayfah: The Prophet ('allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) established a bond of
brotherhood between Salm!n and Abul-Dard!. Salm!n paid a visit to Abul-Dard! and
found Umml-Dard! dressed in shabby clothes, and he asked her why she was in that state.
She replied, Your brother, Abul-Dard!, is not interested in the luxuries of this world. In
the meantime Abul-Dard! came and prepared a meal for him (Salm!n), and said to him,
(Please) eat, for I am fasting. Salm!n said, I am not going to eat, unless you eat. So Abul-
Dard! ate. When it was night, Abul-Dard! got up (for the night prayer). Salm!n said (to
him), Sleep, and he slept. Again Abul-Dard! got up (for the prayer), and Salm!n said (to
him), Sleep. When it was the last part of the night, Salm!n said to him, Get up now (for the
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

prayer). So both of them offered their prayers and Salm!n said to Abul-Dard!, Your Lord
has a right upon you, and your own self has a right on you, and your family has a right on
you, so you should give the rights of all those who have a right upon you). Later, Abul-
Dard! visited the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) and mentioned that to him. The
Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Salm!n has spoken the truth. (al-Bukh!ri)

Imam Ibn Qayyim said, When a person denies in excess, he can end up acting on the desires
deviantly and in excess. It is not correct to completely suppress desires.
Even when it comes to sadaqa, the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) would not allow
someone to give all their wealth in charity. Abu Bakr was the exception. He would tell them to
hold some of it for their money for family. He did not want people to go all in and have
unrealistic expectations from self.

But when it comes to abandoning sins it should be done rapidly, not gradually. You gradually
build good habits, good character and grow close to All!h with a balanced understanding.

2.5.2 What is True Zuhd (Asceticism)?

We dont believe in celibacy. We dont believe in becoming monks. We dont believe in
denying the duniya.

Sulayman (as) was a true zahid. He had the dunya, an amazing and customized kingdom. He
asked All!h for it, He said, My Lord, forgive me and grant me a kingdom such as will not
belong to anyone after me. Indeed, You are the Bestower. ()!d: 35) He was not a person of
dunya, however. He did not let his kingdom to affect his mission or corrupt him.

Sulaym!n was once walking in his kingdom with people and animals following him and a
righteous worshipper said, O son of David, All!h has given you a great kingdom.
Sulaym!n stopped and asked, Who said that? They pointed out the man. He said, One
sub&!nAll!h is better in the book of a believer is better than everything the son of David has
been given. What has been given to the son of David will disappear, but the tasb#& will stay
forever. He had the kingdom, but at the same time, that wasnt what he was all about.

We are supposed to make du!: O All!h, grant us in the dunya good and in the !khirah good
and protect us from the fire. Why do we say qina adh!bl-n!r? Just because you get
&asanah in the !khirah doesnt mean you wont get some of the punishment first. It is okay to
ask for dunya and to ask for good. It is from the Sunnah of the prophets to do so.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Asceticism does not mean you live poverty. You dont stop working and live in the masjid.
Umar saw some young people sleeping in the masjid in the middle of the day and told them to
wake up and work and make money.

Ali b. Abi -!lib defines zuhd best: Asceticism is not that you own nothing but it is that
nothing owns you. What you own stays in your hand and doesnt go to your hearts. No
relationship or wealth or reputation owns you. You own all of that stuff and you control it.
It doesnt control you or affect your ibadaah.

When Umar b. Abdul-Aziz passed away, Leo III, the Roman Emperor, came out of his
house crying and said, If there was to be a man who could bring the dead back to life after
.sa, it would have been Umar b. Abdul-Aziz. People should not be impressed by a monk
who never had anything in the first place who abandoned the world and stayed in his temple
worshipping, but people should be impressed and amazed by a person to whom the dunya
presented itself to his feet and he still abandoned it.

Its okay to have leisure in our lives, but at the end of the day we need to ask ourselves,
What are we accomplishing?
Chapter 6: Get Your Wird On

Wird is a way from the sunnah to keep the remembrance of All!h.

Comparison with Shariah

Shariah means a well trodden path leading towards water in the desert. When you say sharatu
al ibl, it means that I took my camel down the path that leads to water. I didn't force him to
drink. The camel drank whatever it felt like.

When you say awirdtu al ibl (I gave the camel wird), it means I gave the camel water.
With wird you consistently get water, you go to the water because it is good for you. As for
shariah, it is up to the person to drink or not to drink. With wird, you force yourself to go to
the water.

And mention the name of your Lord [in prayer] morning and evening. And during the night
prostrate to Him and exalt Him a long [part of the] night. (al-Insa!n: 25-26)

The wird starts off from 5 pillars of Islam
2.6.1 The Purpose of the Pillars
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

1. Shahada curbs shirk
2. Salah curbs arrogance and pride and all of those diseases
3. Zakah curbs greed, hubb ud dunya (love of the dunya)
4. Fasting curbs flaws of tongue, anger and shahawaat (desires)
5. Hajj curbs everything. Thats why it is only required once in lifetime. Hajj mabroor (an
accepted hajj) does away with everything.

Abu Darda: I do things that are neither haram nor are in the sunnah, but that makes me better
in ibaadah.

How can we develop this habit?
2.6.2 Understand your complexity!
Indeed, the Muslim men and Muslim women, the believing men and believing women, the
obedient men and obedient women, the truthful men and truthful women, the patient men
and patient women, the humble men and humble women, the charitable men and charitable
women, the fasting men and fasting women, the men who guard their private parts and the
women who do so, and the men who remember Alla!h often and the women who do so - for
them Alla!h has prepared forgiveness and a great reward. (al-Ah!za!b: 35)

Ibn Masud was told that we never saw you fast voluntarily. He said that verily siyaam (fasting)
stops me from reading the Qur)!n and reading the Qur)!n is more beloved to me than fasting.
Some people have the ability to consistently fast. People are different.

Not all of the sahaaba were the same. We need to understand our complexity. But make sure
you act with a sense of purpose.
2.6.3 Act with a Sense of Purpose

There is a story related by al-Shawk!ni about the great mu&addith Abu D!w%d. Abu D!w%d
was on board a ship and he heard someone far away sneeze and say al&amdulill!h. He
wanted to go the person and say yar&amuk All!h to receive the reward, so he paid one
dirham to rent a rowboat and went to the person and said this and came back to the ship.
Im!m Abu D!w%d was asked why he did that, and he said, The person will in return for
saying yar&amuk All!h make du! for my guidance, and maybe his supplication is of those
whose du! is answered. They heard a voice saying, Surely Abu D!w%d has purchased
paradise from All!h for one dirham. Whenever you have a subtle thought in the mind
everything blends itself to that thought. You cannot hold a believer from good deeds. The
believer will always find a way to please All!h.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Yahya (raa) related to me from Malik (raa) from Ishaq ibn Abdull!h ibn Abi Talha (raa) that
at-Tufayl ibn Ubayy ibn Kab (raa) told him that he visited Abdull!h ibn Umar (raa) one
morning and went out with him to the market, and when they were out, Abdull!h ibn Umar
(raa) did not pass by anyone selling poor merchandise or selling commodities or a needy person
or anyone but that he greeted them. At-Tufayl (raa) said, I came to Abdull!h ibn Umar (raa)
one day and he asked me to follow him to the market. I said to him, What will you do in the
market if you will not stop to sell nor seek any goods or barter with them or sit in any of the assemblies or
market? Abdull!h ibn Umar (raa) said that we should sit down and talk, and then he
explained,Abu Batni (raa), (lit. father of the belly, at-Tufayl had a prominent stomach), we go out in
the morning only for the sake of the greeting. We greet whomever we meet. (Greetings Maliks
Muwatta: Book 53 : Hadith 53.3.6) He went to the market simply doing the good deed of
greeting other people.
2.6.4 The P90x (insanity workout) Wird
Abdulla!h b. Amr narrated that the messenger of Alla!h (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said:
Every servant of Alla!h possesses some inclination (shirra), and every inclination has its course
(fatra). If ones inclination is for the Sunnah, he has succeeded. If otherwise, he has perished.

The key for this insanity workout is muscle confusion. You keep on switching the muscles you
are working on. We have these intensive times for a purpose. All!h sends us Laylatul Qadr
and other special days of ibadah at different times of the year to boost our emaan.

If you are someone accustomed to reading Qur)!n, you keep diversifying your portfolio
within the sunnah. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Verily, faith becomes
worn out in your heart the way a thawb becomes worn out. You need to confuse your
spirituality and do things out of the ordinary and push yourself. Do sajdah of shukr. Pray two
rak*ahs n!filah out of the blue. Read Qur)!n out of the blue. Even when you establish a
routine, if you only do the routine, then you will start getting bored and it will no longer
serve its purpose. You need to have consistent things in your day and also you need to
2.6.5 The superstar: Abu Bakr (ra(yAll!hu anhu)
Whoever spends two things in the way of Alla!h will be called from the gates of Jannah and
willbe addressed, O slave of Alla!h, here is prosperity! So whoever was among the people who
used to offer their prayers will be called from the gate of prayer; and whoever was among the
people who used to participate in jiha!d will be called from the gates of jiha!d; and whoever was
among those who used to observe fasts will be called from the gate of al-rayya!n; and whoever
was among those who used to give in charity will be called from the gate of charity. Abu Bakr
said, Let my parents be sacrificed for you, Oh Alla!hs Messenger! No distress or need will
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

befall him one will be called from those gates. Will there by anyone who will be called from all
these gates? The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) replied, Yes. And I hope you will be
one of them. (S!ah!i!h! Bukha!ri)

But those who feared their Lord will be driven to Paradise in groups until, when they reach it
while its gates have been opened and its keepers say, "Peace be upon you; you have become
pure; so enter it to abide eternally therein," [they will enter]. (Az Zumar 39:73)

When people show up in throngs, the gates of Jannah unravel and people stare. There is a huge
journey. The angels welcome the people saying: "Peace be upon you; you have become pure; so
enter it to abide eternally therein,"

If you get to the gates of Jannah and malaaika are calling you to come through this gate, Abu
Bakr wanted all the gates to call to him. The sahaaba had ambition and passion. A lot of us
think we would just be lucky to just get in. Sahaba were ahlul himmah and that's what made
them so much more special,

Ali said about Abu Bakr: He was at the forefront of every good (kaana sabaaqan (sabaqa,
sabiqoon) li kulli khayr).

Ali says about Abu Bakr: Every time you think of good, Abu Bakr has already done it.

Abu Hurayrah narrated that: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) said to his companions, Who among you is fasting today? Abu Bakr said, I am. He said,
Who among you has attended a funeral? Abu Bakr said, I have. He said, Is there anyone
among you who has visited a sick person? Abu Bakr said, I have. He said, Is there anyone
among you who has given charity? Abu Bakr said, I have. He said, (These qualities) are not
combined in a man but he will enter Paradise. Narrated by Muslim.

He had so much barakah in time, he tried to do everything and was consistent on that. If you
get into jannah from one gate, you wont want to come out, you forget everything outside.

This is a superstar!
Chapter 7: The Daily Wird
2.7.1 A Share of Contemplation & Remembrance

What can I get done in a day?

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

All!h says,

In the alternation of the night and day and in the creation of the heavens and the earth are
signs for the people whose intellect is clear. Surat 'Ali `Imran: 190)

Al-ulil-alb!b means that there is nothing occupying your mind except for All!h. Clean
intellect. You contemplate. People whose minds are free from other than All!h. Their minds
are focused. Those who remember All!h standing, sitting, and while lying down. They are
contemplating the creation of the heavens and the earth and say, O All!h, You did not create
this in vain. Sub*!nak. So protect me from the punishment. They are focused and in the
zone and wherever they are they see the remembrance of All!h. They start off their day with a
sense of purpose.

Nowadays people who are bombarded with wasteful things. We are addicted to technology.
What about starting day off with zikr and not checking email? How would you like to limit
your tech use to 30 minutes and see what your day is like? We automatically paralyze
ourselves with media when we start our day with it. First thing we do when we wake up is we
check email. Lets try to wait for an hour before you check anything.

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) had the love of seclusion. He ("allall!hu alayhi
wa sallam) would go to Hir! for weeks. He would think and contemplate.

Umar b. al-Kha##!b (ra(yAll!hu anhu) said, You should have some proportion of solitude or
else you will become heedless.

Al-$asan al-Ba"ri said: Contemplation is a mirror that shows you your good and bad

You should have a love of seclusion. They are special moments between you and All!h.

Imagine being like Ibn Taymiyyah, who stated, What can my enemies do to me? I have in my
breast both my heaven and my garden. If I travel they are with me, never leaving me.
Imprisonment for me is a chance to be alone with my Lord. To be killed is martyrdom and to be
exiled from my land is a spiritual journey.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Im!m al-Awz!i said, At the time of fajr or before it, the salaf would be as if birds were sitting
on their heads, sitting and concentrating in worship, so much so that if a close friend came
after having been parted from them, they would not even notice. After, they would meet each
other and sit in circles. The first thing they will do is discuss the !khirah. Then after that,
they would discuss what would become of them in the hereafter. Then they would split into
other circles and study the Qur)!n. Then they would split into more circles and study fiqh
until it reached the time of (u&a prayer, and they would pray two rak*ahs. They would then
tell the jokes and sing the poetry of j!hiliyyah. (They had their share of talking about dunya.)
In the morning, there was a time of solitude and thinking of your situation.

When you start your day with salah and contemplation, you are in the zone for the entire day.
Ibn Taymiyyah in his Majmoo al Fatawwa said, To contemplate for an hour is better than
worship for a thousand years. If someone jumps into salaah without preparing for it, it doesnt
really have any effect. But if they contemplate the quality of ibadaah is much better. Take
moments to contemplate and remember All!h.

In an authentic narration, Rabiah al-Adawiyyah says, I have never heard the !dh!n except
that I remember the caller who will announce the Day of Resurrection and I never see the
falling snow except that I imagine the flying pages of the records of peoples deeds on the
Day of Judgment. I never see swarms of locusts except that I think about the great gathering
on the Last Day. Everything she sees reminds her of the !khirah and the Day of Judgment.
These are people of true intellect.

The example of [this] worldly life is but like rain which We have sent down from the sky that
the plants of the earth absorb - [those] from which men and livestock eat - until, when the
earth has taken on its adornment and is beautified and its people suppose that they have
capability over it, there comes to it Our command by night or by day, and We make it as a
harvest, as if it had not flourished yesterday. Thus do We explain in detail the signs for a
people who give thought. (Yu!nus: 24)

Narrated A!ishah (rad!yAlla!hu anha): The commencement of the Divine Inspiration to Alla!hs
Apostle (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) was in the form of good dreams, which came true like
brightday light, and then the love of seclusion was bestowed upon him. He used to go in
seclusion in the cave of Hira! where he used to worship (Alla!h alone) continuously for many
days before his desire to see his family... (al-Bukha!ri)

Umar b. al-Khat!t!a!b (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) said, You should have some proportion of solitude or
else you will become heedless.

Al-H!asan al-Bas!ri said: Contemplation is a mirror that shows you your good and bad deeds.
Sometimes you just need to sit and think about your situation and contemplate. Think about
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

how you measure up to what Alla!h (subh!a!nahu wa taa!la) has commanded from you. Ibn
Taymiyyah would contemplate at the riverbank every single day. This was the habit of the
s!a!lih!i!n. Reflect on nature.

Remember: Without a regimen you cannot keep anything going.

Keep in mind the sahaba had barakah in their time and used their time wisely. They go the
distractions out of the way.

Department of labor study in 2009 studied the TV watching habits of Americans. They found
Americans to be zombies. Average amount of TV an American watched in a month was 153
hours. This is before social became big. The working class watched on average 30 hours of TV
per week. School child under age of 12 watched about 40 hours a week. A person who earned
six figures watched above 11-12 hours a week. People who earned over 250k watched 2.5
hours and it was related to their profession.Over a span of 80 years the average person will
spend 27 years sleeping, 17 years working, 5 years driving and 3 years in bathroom.

Make sure you have Hisnul Muslim. There are apps you can download for your iPhone and
iPad also; MyDuaa/Qamardeen/ISubha.

Start off your day with adkhaar. There is a dua for every situation in your life. Do it regularly
and youll have it memorized soon.

Which is preferable: seclusion or keeping company?

Im!m Ibn Qud!mah talks about some scholars who preferred absolute seclusion and some
preferred to be around people. Understand your complexity. If you progress more in solitude,
then keep more solitude. If you progress more around righteous people, then keep the company
of righteous people. See what is better for you. You need to have a share of both. What do you
increase in? It depends on the individual.

Sufy!n al-Thawri didnt like the company of anyone. Im!m A*mad said, I wish for a world
devoid of people. He liked being alone. You have to diagnose yourself.

Abdull!h Ibn Mas%d said, One should get to used to idea that if everyone in the world was
kaafir, he would still be a believer.

If you have a strong personality, you need to be around people. Even the interactions people
had back then were reminders

Benefits of Seclusion
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

1. Dedication to ritual worship
2. Staying away from sins like backbiting, greed, or hypocrisy
3. Avoiding being affected by others bad behavior
4. Escaping temptation and dissention
5. Saving oneself from others harm
6. Avoiding wasting time

Benefits of keeping Company

1. Opportunity to learn from and teach others
2. Exchanging benefits
3. Improving ones manners through experience.
Alla!h (subh!a!nahu wa taa!la) says, They are the people whose hearts were tested for true
Umar b. Al-Khat!t!a!b said, The one who is tested is better than the one who is not
tested. The one who is not tested is like a zoo animal. If you put them in the wild, they
are done because they havent been tested by the wilderness.
4. Enjoying the company of others
5. Performing righteous deeds that require interaction. There are some deeds that can
only be done through interaction with people.
6. Developing modesty and humility through dealing with others. It is easy for us to say
that we are humble to Alla!h (subh!a!nahu wa taa!la). You prove your humility to Alla!h
(subh!a!nahu wa taa!la) whenever you are willing to humble yourself to a human being
who is in front of you and is at your level. When you can humble yourself to a human
being, then you are humble to Alla!h (subh!a!nahu wa taa!la).

Suyan ibn Uyaynah saw at Thawri in his sleep and asked for advice. He said, Acquaint
yourself with fewer people and as a result you end up backbiting less. Also, naturally when we
talk about bad things, we have more time to speak good, do azkaar and tasbeeh.

Imam darimi said in an authentic hadith in Tabarani, Sahabas wouldn't part unless they recited
wal asr and the other said salaam to remind each other of the sacredness of time.

We dont adopt the wird of any other human being. There is plenty from the sunnah for us to
follow. Look at the authentic sources before following any other human being. Use a masbaha
only if its not for riya. Only use it for counting when it keeps you goal oriented and get much

2.7.2 A Share of Meaningful Obligatory Prayers
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Recite, [O Muh!ammad], what has been revealed to you of the Book and establish prayer.
Indeed, prayer prohibits immorality and wrongdoing, and the remembrance of Alla!h is
greater. And Alla!h knows that which you do. (al-Ankabu!t: 45)

Uthma!n b. Affa!n reports that the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, If the time for a
prescribed s!ala!h comes, and a Muslim performs ablution properly, (and then offers his s!ala!h)
with humility and bowing, it will be an expiation for his past sins, so long as he has not
committed a major sin, and this is applicable to all times. (Muslim)

Having a share of quality salaah completely changes you. You schedule your life around the

Meaningful Prayer

How to attain Khushoo?
All!h said, Verily, prayer prohibits one from wrongdoing. Imagine feeling like your 'al!h
was a conversation with All!h. Would you be able to rush your 'al!h if you are on Facebook?
Honestly give each of the five 'alaw!t their due. All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la) says in &ad#th
qudsi: My servant does not come close to Me with anything other than the mandatory
actions. It starts with the prayer. Use it to remind you of All!h. There is no way you can
talk to All!h five times a day and then do those things you are going to do. You would not be
able to backbite. When you engage in a dialogue with All!h, it will stop you from doing those
things naturally.

Reflection on the words

Know the basic meanings of what you say in 'al!h. Memorize the translation. You arent
supposed to just stare at the carpet in the 'al!h. The words that are being said are supposed
to humble you.

Glorification of the words

Think about the words and reflect on them, and find the !y!t that apply to you. Recite in your
'al!h the !y!t that you love most.

Contemplating each action

When you say All!hu akbar, you are saying All!h is Greater than whatever it is that you
brought to your 'al!h. You contemplate each action. Malcolm X said that he was not able to
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

bring himself to do suj%d at first, but once he did it, it was the best thing he did in his life.
Once he put himself down in suj%d, he never wanted to get back up because he understood
the meaning. What are you doing with your face on the ground saying Glory be to All!h, the
Most High?

Pre and Post S!ala!h
Pre-Salah determines the quality of your salah. When islam is on your mind, its naturally
If you fail to plan, you plan to fail. This is true for all other forms of ibadah.

Abu Darda advises to see our needs before prayer so that we can concentrate and turn to All!h
without distraction.

Clean up the area around you and make it a place that is appropriate for prayer. Take your
best clothes to the prayer. Perfume yourself. Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, If
it wasnt a hardship for my ummah, I would order them to use the misw!k before the 'al!h.

Im!m Ibn al-Qayyim said, If the person goes into the 'al!h and then turns away (his heart
turns away, his mind or thoughts turn away), All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la) says, O My
servant, where are you going? To something better than Me? Sub&!nAll!h. Where are you
turning to? Align yourself to think of All!h. Before you start your 'al!h, stand there and
think that you are about to talk to All!h. Then go into the 'al!h and start reciting S%ratl-
F!ti&ah. Imagine how insulting it is when you are doing the motions of 'al!h and All!h is
offering you attention and you are not offering All!h your attention.

Everything changes when you prepare for your salah.

Post salah, have those few minutes of reflection and do tasbeeh, dhikr and make dua. Dont
stand up right away.


Khushoo - linguistically means silence. When you are silent on the inside and silent on the
outside, you are giving something your full attention. This is how we will be on Day of
Judgement. And that is what we need to attain in our salah.

Is there any way to obtain internal silence if you are not externally silent? No. Mohammmad
Hussain Yaqoub said, When one is sleeping in the balcony with all the cars honking that is
khushoo. If you have TV running and you have to move things out of the way during salah -
that is not helpful. Imam of Masjid Quba said, The secret of khushoo is that you turn to All!h
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

with your heart first then your body. You dont start salaah until your heart has turned
towards All!h. Take 5 mins before salah so there is nothing on your mind except salaah.

The example of Urwah b. al-Zubayr: When he prayed, the birds would stand on his head and
shoulders. He had to have his leg amputated, and they wanted to intoxicate him to remove it,
but he told them to wait until fajr prayer and cut it off when he was in prayer.

When Abdull!h b. al-Zubayr was praying next to the Kabah and it caught fire, his clothes
caught fire and didnt notice. The people started extinguishing the fire on him.

A practical way on how to achieve khush% in 'al!h: Al-$!tim b. ("im (ra&imahull!h) was
one of the tabi#n. He was asked, How do you attain tranquility in your prayer? We see
you so engulfed. How do you reach that level? He said, Before I start, I imagine the
'ir!" (bridge over Hellfire) in front of me. I imagine Jannah is on my right and Hellfire is
on my left. I remember that the one who does not pray his 'alaw!t in this world will be
grabbed by a hook on the 'ir!" and have to make them up in Jahannam. Then I imagine
the angel of death is standing behind me, and I dont know when he is going to attack.
Then I imagine that the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) is standing in front of me
to monitor the correctness of my 'al!h. Then I remember that All!h, Who created all of
that, is monitoring me. Then I start.

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, When the believer is sat up in the grave, the
first thing he says is that he needs to pray the 'al!h

Make sure you body is still during salah. If you body is not still then your heart is not still. A
bedouin was asked by the Prophet Saw to repeat his prayer three times for he did not have
stillness in his prayer.

1. Those who are unjust with themselves. They have wasted their s!ala!h by not completing
the proper pillars and by not praying on time. Their s!ala!h is worthless. Their salah is invalid
and they will be punished for it.

2. Those who perform the prayer in its correct hours, and they complete its technical
requirements, but they are unable to strive against themselves and against the
whispers of Shayt!a!n, so their mind is occupied by other things. It is all form and no
substance. Their salah is questionable and they may or may not be forgiven.

3. Those who maintain its pillars and its correctness and strive against themselves and
the whispers of Shayt!a!n. They are busy throughout the s!ala!h striving against the
whispers and themselves. This person is engaged in jiha!d. He is not tasting khushu! yet
but is fighting Shayt!a!n. All is will forgive him.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

4. Those who whenever they enter the s!ala!h, they perfect its duties and their heart is
focused on perfecting the s!ala!h. They make sure that they dont waste a single portion
of the s!ala!h and fulfill all of its internal and external requirements. They do everything that is
to be done externally and they are concerned with properly performing salaah. Their heart is
in servitude to All!h and they have fought off most off the distractions. They will be rewarded
for not only fulfilling the salah but will be rewarded also extra for it.

5. Those who when they enter into the s!ala!h, they place their hearts into the Hands of
Alla!h (subh!a!nahu wa taa!la), staring at the Creator through their hearts, filled with love
for Him. They have gone beyond fighting the whispers and themselves. The only thing
beloved to them at that moment is the s!ala!h. They are immersed in the s!ala!h. This is
the category of ih!sa!n: worshipping Alla!h as if you can see Him, and if you cant see Him,
then know that He sees you. They are the highest level. They are in delighted in their Salaah.
They are the awliyah (beloved friends) of All!h (sub&!nahu wa ta!la).

Zayn al-Abid&n was in suj%d in 'al!h. He didnt raise his head until the fire went out, and
when he was asked about this, he said, The other fire kept my mind occupied.

Salah is a dialogue with All!h. Salah is the miraaj (ascension) of the believer. If this connection
is severed you will not be able to connect to All!h

Pray your s!ala!h on time and plan around it

Plan your day around salaah. You wont be able to attain khushu in a Macys fitting room.
Dont plan your salaah around your day.

Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) tells us about the coming of al-Dajj!l. He said that
one day will be like a year and one day will be like a month and one day like a week. The first
question the 'a&!bah asked was, How will we pray during those days? The Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, You estimate based on your regular times. They were
that concerned.

The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, When the believer is sat up in the grave, the
firstthing he says is that he needs to pray the s!ala!h.

Al Qasim bin Muhammad said, Whenever I went out in the morning, I used to visit`Aaa'ishah
radhiAll hu `anha (his aunt and the wife of the Prophet, sallAll hu `alayhi wa sallam) and
greet her. One day I found her performing Ad Duha prayer, reciting this Ayah repeatedly,
crying and invoking All h: So All h has been gracious to us, and has saved us from the
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

torment of the Fire. (52:27) I stood there until I felt bored, so I left and went to the market to
do something and said to myself that when I finish what I have to do, I will go back (to `Aishah
radhiAllahu `anha). When I finished and went back to her, I found her still standing in prayer,
reciting the same Ayah, crying and invoking Allah. [Al Ihya 4/436]. As long as you have
khushoo with an ayah, stay there as long as the khushoo is there.
2.7.3 A Share of Voluntary Prayers

Get the best experience of salaah through the sunan:

1. Sunan Ra!tibah: the voluntary prayers that the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam)
never left. For example: 2 rak+ahs before fajr, 4 rak+ahs before z!uhr, 4 rak+ahs after z!uhr,
2 rak+ahs after maghrib, 2 rak+ahs after isha!. The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam)
also never abandoned the witr prayer.
2. Mustah!abba!t: Recommended prayers that the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) did
sometimes and left at other times. Example: 4 rak+ahs before as!r sometimes he did it
and sometimes he did not. (There is some basis in the Sunnah for these).
3. Tat!awwua!t: Pure voluntary prayers. These can be done at any time prayer is

All!h is so generous and merciful to us. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said in
an authentic &ad#th in al-Tirmidhi: On the Day of Judgment, the first thing you will be
asked about is your prayer. If your prayer is deficient, All!h will ask for your voluntary
prayers. All!h will patch up your mandatory prayers with your voluntary prayers. Then
you will be asked about your fasting. The deficiencies are made up with the voluntary days.
All!h patches up our deficiencies for us.

17 rakah of fard salaah a day
2 rakah fajr sunnah
2 rakah duha
4 b4 dhhr
4 after dhuhr
2 after maghrib
3 witr

You should make a goal to have as many sunnah as faraaid to makeup for the deficiencies in
your prayers. Build it up slowly and spread the out throughout the day.

Whoever of you fears that he cannot wake up in the latter part of the night, he should
pray witr before sleeping. And whoever of you believes that he will be able to wake during the
latter portion of the night, he should make the witr prayer during that latter portion as it is a
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

blessed time.
2.7.4 A Share of Qiy!m
We need to learn how to implement qiyaam in our lives. That is your lifeline, especially if
youre involved in Muslim community.

The one s%rah you need to read every night before you sleep is S%ratl-Mulk. The Prophet
("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Whoever recites it every night will be protected from the
punishment of the grave. Spend three minutes to recite the Surah before sleep and he
protects you from the punishment of grave.

Al-H!asan al-Bas!ri was asked, How is it that those who observe qiya!ml-layl are among the
people with the most beautiful faces? To this he replied, Because they commune with the
Most Merciful, and He clothes them in light from His light.

How can I start praying Qiyamulayl?

1. Intention (Niyyah)
2. Determination (Al Azeemah)
3. Repentance
Sufya!n al-Thawri said, Dont disobey Him during the day and you will be
able to worship Him during the night. I was forbidden from praying qiya!ml-layl for six
months (20 years??) because of a sin I was committing. The sins can keep you asleep.
4. Kick the bad habits
5. Sleep early
6. Take a nap sometime in the day (particularly around z!uhr time)
7. Go easy on the Biryani! If you eat heavy before you sleep, it is harder to wake up.
8. Understand only Alla!h wakes you up. Make dua! to Alla!h to wake you up.
All!h doesnt want you torture yourself, however. A person should pray until they
dont understanding what they are saying anymore. Then they should sleep.
9. Read about the merits
10. Set your alarm in a place far away in the room and kill the Shayt!a!n button. Use
commonsense and avoid the snooze button.
11. Get your family involved.
12. Make Wudu before sleeping
Authentic hadith in tabarani narrated by Umar: If you purify yourself before going to
sleep the angel sits at your head and makes dua for you.

You should perform qiyaam al layl even if it is one rakah. Start it off with 2 rakahs at home
before you sleep

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

2.7.5 A Share of Recitation and Memorization of the Qur!n

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, It is better for you to learn a single verse of
Qur)!n in the morning than to pray 100s of rakahs at night. Even if you are memorizing one
ayah a day it does have an effect on your life.
If you read four pages of Qur)!n with every 'al!h, then you will finish the Qur)!n every
month. Planning around salah is the key to having a productive day. Sufy!n b. Uyaynah said
the salaf used to consider a person a hypocrite if they didnt finish the Qur)!n in a month.
Dont wait until the last day of the month and then say that you need to finish the Qur)!n.

Al Bukhari used to finish the Qur)!n once a day in Ramadan and once every 3 days outside of
Ramadan. Its important to have himmah to achieve your goal.

When you have the goal of memorizing the Qur)!n, you naturally become better in school and
work. You understand the value of time. You dont spend time listening to garbage but rather
focus on reciting All!hs pure words. It naturally puts you in a state of purification.

Uthm!n b. Aff!n reports that the Messenger of All!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said,
The best of you is the one who learns the Qur!n and teaches it. (al-Bukh!ri)

Anas (ra(yAll!hu anhu) reports that the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Surely,
All!h, Most High, has chosen some people (to be His favorite servants), It was said, Who
are those people, O Messenger of All!h? The People of the Qur!n, said the Messenger of
All!h, and he added, They are the (favorite) people of All!h. (al-Nas!i)

This is the easiest way to discipline yourself. Get in the process of memorizing Qur)!n. Your
life completely changes because everyday you have a goal that you are trying to achieve. Set
a daily goal of memorizing a few !y!t. Stay in the gardens of the Qur)!n throughout the day
as much as possible.
2.7.6 A share of charity

Never will you attain the good [reward] until you spend [in the way of All!h] from that
which you love. And whatever you spend - indeed, All!h is Knowing of it. (!le-Imr!n: 92)

Narrated Abu Hurayrah: The Prophet ('allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Charity is
obligatory everyday on every joint of a human being. If one helps a person in matters
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

concerning his riding animal by helping him to ride it or by lifting his luggage on to it, all
this will be regarded charity. A good word, and every step one takes to offer the
compulsory congregational prayer, is regarded as charity; and guiding somebody on the
road is regarded as charity.

What if my charity was given to one undeserving? Dont be sad because the Prophet
('allall!hualayhi wa sallam) has some news for you. (Muslim)

The Prophet ('allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said charity is due on a person every day. The
Prophet ('allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Whoever constructs a small well, no one would
drink from it except that All!h will reward you from it on the Day of Judgment. He
also said, If you are planting a plant and the Day of Judgment comes, finish planting your

Imagine if you could ask the most righteous person in the world, Shaykh, I want you to
make du! for me every single day. He asks for your name and says he will. Now imagine
the angels making du! for you. Ras%lull!h ('allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Every day the
angels say, O All!h, reward the one who gave and hold back from the one who held back.

Every day, put something in your 2 l i ter bottle and when it is full, give it away in
'adaqah. You have just guaranteed the du! of the angels every day of your life, insh!All!h.

2.7.7 How much can I accomplish in a day?
Imagine the reward of:
1. Praying fajr and isha! in jamaa in masjid.
The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, The one who prays isha! in jamaah, it is as if
he prayed the first half of the night in qiyaml-layl. The one who prays fajr in jamaah, it is as
if he prayed the second half of the night in qiyaml-layl. Woman could be praying in her
home. Ima!m Ibn al-Qayyim says she gets the same reward as long as she makes the intention
before s!ala!h. Whenever a traveler travels, if he prays two rak*ahs, it is more rewardable
because it is the proper intention.

2. Praying d!uh!a
If a person remembers Alla!h after their fajr prayer until the time of d!uh!a and then prays 2
rak+ahs, a full H!ajj will be written for him.

He (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said in hadith of Abu Dharr, Charity is required from every
part of your body daily. Saying subh!a!nAlla!h is a charity. Saying alh!amdulilla!h is a charity.
Saying Alla!hu akbar is a charity. Every Commanding the good is a charity. Every Forbidding
evil is a charity. What suffices for all of that is 2 rakahs that you pray in d!uh!a.

3. Doing tasbi!h! after s!ala!h
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Amr b. Al-A!s! narrated that the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, After the s!ala!h, if
a person says subh!a!nAlla!h ten times and alh!amdulilla!h ten times and Alla!hu akbar ten times
after all five of his prayers, then 150 on his tongue and 1,500 good deeds on his scale. If at
night before he sleeps he says subh!a!nAlla!h 33 times, alh!amdulilla!h 33 times, and Alla!hu akbar
34 times, it is 100 on the tongue, 1,000 on the scale. Who amongst you commits 2,500 sins a

4. Praying just 2 rak+ahs of qiya!m
H!adi!th of Anas: Rasu!lulla!h (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Prayer in my masjid is equal to
10,000 prayers elsewhere. Prayer in Masjidl-H!ara!m in Makkah is equal to 100,000 prayers
elsewhere. Prayer in the battlefield is equal to one million prayers elsewhere. What is
more beloved to Alla!h than all of that is 2 rak+ahs in the middle of the night.

From Ibn Ma!jah: Whoever prays qiya!m with 10 a!yahs, he will never be written as those
who are heedless. Whoever stands up and prays with 100 a!ya!t will be written from those
who are standing in prayer. Whoever wants to stand and pray with 1000 a!ya!t will be
written with Alla!h as those who are piling up good deeds.

Start with 2 rak+ahs before you sleep. Read Su!ratl-Falaq and Su!ratl-Na!s and it will be
sufficient to not be written amongst those who are heedless.

5. Saying the dua! after wud!u!
The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, No one does wud!u! and then says
except that all of the gates of Jannah will be opened and he can enter from whichever gate
he chooses. (Muslim)

6. Saying the dua! of the marketplace
Whoever says upon entering the marketplace, Alla!h will write for him one million h!asana!t and
will erase from him one million evil deeds and will build for him a house in Paradise.

7. Make dua/ istighfar for muslims

Ubaadah ibn as-Saamit radiallaahu anhu related that the Prophet sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam
said: Whosoever seeks forgiveness for the believing men and the believing women, Allaah will
record for that person equivalent to every believing man and believing woman a good
Chapter 8: The Weekly Wird
2.8.1 Components of a Fruitful Jumuah Experience
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Components of a Fruitful Jumuah Experience
1. Starting on Thursday night with Su!ratl-Kahf, cleaning, s!alawa!t
2. Ghusl
3. Beautifying yourself and using the miswa!k
4. Walking to the masjid
5. Going as early as possible
6. Avoiding stepping over people
7. Avoiding walking in front of the worshippers
8. Praying in the first row
9. Repeat the a!dha!n
10. Listen attentively
11. Pray sunnah afterwards
12. Stay in the mosque until as!r
13. Look for the hour: Hour during which duas are accepted, so look for it.

There is an hour on Friday that if a servant calls upon Alla!h, he will surely be answered.
Some narrations it is while the ima!m is sitting down in Jumuah and other narrations indicate it
is the last hour before maghrib. Some scholars say it switches.
2.8.2 Suratl-Kahf

Read it on the night of Thursday or on the day of Friday. It was narrated that Ibn Umar
(rad!yAlla!hu anhu) said: The Messenger of Alla!h (s!allalla!hualayhi wa sallam) said: Whoever
reads Su!ratl-Kahf on the day of Jumuah, a light will shine for him from beneath his feet to the
clouds of the sky, which will shine for him on the Day of Resurrection, and he will be forgiven
(his sins) between the two Fridays. (Mundhiri)

Also increase in salawaat on Prophet on Thursday night and day of Friday.
2.8.3 Fasting Mondays and Thursdays

Abu Hurayrah (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) narrated that the Messenger of Alla!h (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa
sallam) said, The deeds are presented on Monday and Thursday, so I love that my deeds be
presented while I am fasting. (al-Tirmidhi)

Start applying the days of fasting, especially right after Rama(!n when you are still in the
habit. This is golden time. You are already used to fasting, so take advantage of it.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Send 'alaw!t on the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) on Friday (the night of Thursday).
Also, on the day of Friday, look for the hour. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said,
There is an hour on Friday that if a servant calls upon All!h, he will surely be answered.
Some narrations it is while the im!m is sitting down in Jumuah and other narrations indicate
it is the last hour before maghrib. Some scholars say it switches. The 'a&!bah took Friday as a
weekly +d. They were able to go out with their family and do things. It was a special day.
Chapter 9: The Monthly Wird
Make a planner for yourself on what you need to do in a week, a month, and one day, and one
2.9.1 Fasting the white days
They are the 13th, 14th, and 15th of every single month.

Abu Hurayrah (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) narrated that the Messenger of Alla!h (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa
sallam) took a covenant from him for three: To not sleep except after performing witr, to fast
three days of every month, and to perform the d!uh!a prayer. (Tirmidhi)
2.9.2 Recognize what month you are in!
Pay attention and try to do something within that month. Make sure that you finish the
Qur)a!n at least once a month.

Narrated Abu Bakra that the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said. The division of time
has turned to its original form which was current when Alla!h created the Heavens and the
The year is of twelve months, out of which four months are sacred: Three are in succession
Dhul-Qadah, Dhul-H!ijjah and Muh!arram, and (the fourth is) Rajab of (the tribe of) Mudar
which comes between Juma!dal-Tha!niyah and Shaba!n. (Bukha!ri)

Take advantage of the seasons. Abu Hurayrah (ra(yAll!hu anhu) said, Shall I not point you
to an easy reward? Fasting in the winter. The 'a&!bah loved to fast in the winter because it
was easy.

Ubayd b. Umayyad said that when the winter came, they would say, O people of the Qur)!n,
the night has become long so you can pray longer, and the day has become short so you can

2.9.3 How much Qura!n should I have finished?
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Once a month? Twice a month? Once a week?

Push yourself and start increasing the load.
Chapter 10: The Yearly Wird
2.10.1 Rama(!n
Ras%lull!h ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) once said !m#n three times, and the 'a&!bah asked
him why he said that. He ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, Jibr&l was making du!. He
made du! against the person who Rama(!n comes and goes and he isnt forgiven for his sins
and he doesnt change his habits. Take full advantage of Rama(!n and prepare for it. The
'a&!bah used to get excited six months in advance. They are planning and waiting for it. For
other people, they start getting into Rama(!n towards the end and by the time they start
getting into it, it is already over. Start preparing for Rama(!n as much as you can early on.

Narrated Abu Hurayrah (rad!yAlla!hu anhu): The Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said,
Alla!h said, The fast is for Me and I will give the reward for it, as he (the one who observes the
fast) leaves his sexual desire, food and drink for My Sake. Fasting is a screen (from Hell) and
there are two pleasures for a fasting person, one at the time of breaking his fast, and the other
at the time when he will meet his Lord. And the smell of the mouth of a fasting person is better
in Alla!hs Sight than the smell of musk. (Bukha!ri)

Narrated Abu Hurayrah (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) that Alla!hs Apostle (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam)
said,When the month of Ramad!a!n comes, the gates of Paradise are opened and the gates of the
(Hell) Fire are closed, and the devils are chained. (Bukha!ri)

Components of a Fruitful Fast
1. Suh!u!r
2. Break it as soon as the sun has set with dates
3. Generosity
4. More good deeds
5. More charity
6. More Qura!n
7. Itika!f the last 10 nights

Degrees of Fasting
1. Ordinary Fasting
2. Special Fasting
3. Extra-Special Fasting
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

a. Lower your gaze
b. Guard your tongue
c. Guard your ears
d. Keep your limbs pure
e. Once again: Easy on the Biryani!
So how do we achieve taqwa?

In Ramadaan everything is increased. Read more Qur)!n. Doing an umrah in Ramadaan has
the reward of doing Hajj with Prophet.
2.10.2 The 6 days of Shaww!l
Abu Ayyu!b (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) narrated that the Messenger of Alla!h (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa
sallam) said: Whoever fasts Ramad!a!n, then follows it with six from Shawwa!l, then that is
(equal in reward) to fasting everyday. (Tirmidhi)

Im!m M!lik said that it can mean six from Shaww!l itself or it can be mean six days starting
from Shaww!l, meaning starting from Shaww!l until Rama(!n. Im!m M!lik said that he
never saw the people of Mad&nah rushing to finish six days in the month of Shaww!l itself
and that it meant that you do six days of voluntary fasting during the rest of the year on top
of Rama(!n. The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said that every good deed is
multiplied by ten, so then you have one month worth of fasting, which covers ten months,
and then you fast for six days which covers the remaining days of the year. This is a mercy
for those who cannot finish those days in Shaww!l for whatever reason.

Try to fast them right away if you have the opportunity because if you dont do them right
away, you probably never will.

Can you combine intentions between voluntary fasts? Yes. If you decide to fast every
Monday and Thursday, then you can combine the intention of the six fasts with Monday and
2.10.3 The fasting of Araf!t, )sh%r!
Abu Qata!dah (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) narrated that the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said,
Fast the Day of Arafa!t, for indeed I anticipate that Alla!h will forgive (the sins) of the year
it, and the year before it. (Tirmidhi)

Someone may ask: Why do I need to fast on ,sh%r! if I already fasted on Araf!t?
Answer: Araf!t is from Dhul-$ijjah which is the last month in the Islamic calendar. If you
fast Araf!t in Dhul-$ijjah 1433, the reward is that the sins of the previous and upcoming
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

years have been forgiven. ,sh%r! is in Mu&arram, which is the first month of the Islamic
calendar.,sh%r! coming up will be 1434, and the reward is the preceding year has been
forgiven. When you fast Araf!t in 1433, you took care of 1432 and 1434. When you fast
,sh%r! 1434, the reward is taking care of the previous year 1433. Three years in two days.
2.10.4 Zak!h

People have the misconception that if they pay enough charity, then they dont have to worry
about zak!h. You have to intend for your zak!h. The companions used to prefer to give in
Rama(!n and called it shar&l-zak!h.

Its Effect on the Individual and on Society

It was narrated from Abdl-Rah!ma!n b. Ghanm that Abu Ma!lik al-Ashari told him that the
Messenger of Alla!h said, Is!ba!ghl-wudu! is half of faith; alh!amdulilla!h (praise be to Alla!h) fills
the balance; the tasbi!h! and the takbi!r fill the heavens and Earth; the s!ala!h is light; the zaka!h is a
sign (of sincerity); patience is an illuminating torch; and the Qura!n is proof, either for you or
against you. (al-Nasa!i)

Enhancing Your Zaka!h Experience

1. Understand its significance
2. Give it in secret
3. Avoid taunting or harming people
4. Show humbleness
5. Pay it from what is good
6. Look for the best recipient
a. Righteousness
b. People of knowledge
c. People of pure tawhi!d
d. People who dont ask
e. Large families or handicap
f. The closest of kin come first

It was narrated from Salma!n b. A!mir that the Prophet (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa sallam) said,
Giving charity to a poor person is charity, and (giving) to a relative is two things, charity and
upholding the ties of kinship. (al-Nasa!i)
2.10.5 The first 10 days of Dhul-$ijjah
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Ibn Abba!s (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) narrated that the Messenger of Alla!h (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa
sallam) said, There are no days in which righteous deeds are more beloved to Alla!h than those
ten days. They said, O Messenger of Alla!h! Not even jiha!d in Alla!h Cause? The Messenger
of Alla!h said, Not even jiha!d in Alla!hs Cause, unless a man were to out with his self and his
wealth and not return from that with anything. (Tirmidhi)

The Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) said, All!h has blessed the time of my nation in
the early part of the day. You are much more productive after fajr because All!h put barakah
in your time. In S%ratl-Fajr, All!h swore by the most productive time of the year (the 10
days of Dhul-$ijjah) and then All!h said by the night when it fleets away. In Rama(!n, you
are more productive.

These 10 days of Dhul-$ijjah are more beloved to All!h than any 10 days in Rama(!n. Take
advantage of those ten days of the year. If you have the means, make a sacrifice if you have
the means. From the beginning to end of Dhul-$ijjah, if you are going to make a sacrifice,
you cannot shave, cut your hair, or clip your nails. You cannot do these things until your
sacrifice has been done. Al-Shawk!ni said, This is your way of participating with those on
$ajj. Also, it is a sign that everything of your body has been ransomed form Hellfire. You
keep your body in its natural form as a way of ransoming yourself to All!h (sub&!nahu wa
Chapter 11: Once In A Lifetime ($ajj)

Umar b. al-Kha##!b said, Whoever has the means to go to $ajj but does not go to $ajj, let
him die as a Jew or a Christian if he wants. If you have the means and are financially and
physically able to go, then you go.

Americans whine more than anyone else at $ajj. How sad would it be if you go to $ajj, the
once in a lifetime journey, and you waste the opportunity. Dont waste the opportunity!
2.11.1 Before You Go
1. Tawbah
2.Repay debts
3. Dont leave your family struggling
4. Make amends with people. Alla!h will not accept your good deeds because of a quarrel you
had with your brother or sister, so then what would be the point of going?
5. Know your stuff
6. Choose good company. If everyone else is whining, then you feel entitled to.
Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

2.11.2 Inner Meanings of the Man!sik

1. Departure. You are preparing yourself for the journey of death. When a person departs,
he should feel as though he is leaving this world.
2. Ih!ra!m. When a person goes into ih!ra!m, recognize that you are wearing the shrouds of
a. For the h!ajji
b. For the non-h!ajji in the first 10 days of Dhul-H!ijjah
3. Talbiyah. Feel like you are answering the call of Alla!h on the Day of Judgment.
4. Entering the H!aram. You should feel like you have entered into the presence of Alla!h.
5. When you set your eyes on the kabah think of the Lord of the House
6. The Black Stone. When touching it, feel like you are making allegiance to Alla!h.
7. al-Multazam. Feel like you are drawing close to your Lord and yearning for Him.
8. -aw!f. Realize that All!h is at the center of your life and you go the way All!h tells you.
9. Say. Remember the struggle of Hajar running between the two hills and never losing
trust in All!h. This is all that life is. The point you start at is the point where you will
finish. As long as you remain trusting in All!h, All!h will take care of him.
10. Arafah. Remember the Day of Judgment when All!h speaks to every individual without
any translator. Millions are making du! in hundreds of languages, and All!h is
answering all of them.
11. Ramy. Remember that these are the places where Ibr!h&m (alayhil-sal!m) and his
familywere tempted by the Shay"!n.
12. Mad&nah. Feel as if you are entering into the presence of the Prophet ("allall!hu
alayhi wa sallam). Remember that this is where he sat, spoke, stood, ate, did khu"bah,
led 'al!h. Envision the Prophet ("allall!hu alayhi wa sallam) and the 'a&!bah around
him. Im!m M!lik would only walk barefoot in Mad&nah out of how humbled he felt to
be in that city.
2.11.3 Qualities of the Hajji

1. Be a Slave not a master - You dont have any rights there, you are completely submitting to
All!h. You have no right to say it should be this way or that; do not act as if you are in control -
you have no right to be angry; complain afterwards
2. Guest not a host - dont start dictating accommodations
3. Hajji not tourist - don't take pictures and pictures of the Kaba - dont take a camera to hajj.
dont go to the sooq(market) daily, Hajj is a once in a lifetime opportunity, even if you have to
pay the extra $20, pay it, it wont hurt. Just go one day and specify the time.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

Abdull!h b. Mub!rak has a touching story. He would make $ajj one year and jih!d the other
year. One year when he was in $ajj, he had a dream that two angels were talking to each
other and saying, Do you see all these people coming to $ajj? All!h has not accepted from a
single one of them, and all of their $ajj went to waste. He woke up scared. Then he slept
and he dreamt, All!h accepted the $ajj of all of them because of a man named Ali b. Mufiq.
He was a shoe repairman who had saved to go to $ajj. His neighbor fell into poverty, so he
gave all the money to his neighbor and made du! to All!h to accept. It is all about your

Make du!: O All!h, I want to go, facilitate the means.

How badly do you want to go to $ajj?

How badly do you want it to be accepted?
Final Note: Overwhelmed?
Just start, take baby steps. The true test of this class is whether or not you change yourself.

Make sure that today is the day that you dont go back to those past sins. At the very least try
to cry over your situation!

Dont be cheap with your tears, we can't cry over our fate and the possibility of being doomed
for eternity but we can cry over fictional movies? This is a problem! Force yourself to feel
sorry and cry. Try to make the changes.

Abu Hurayrah (rad!yAlla!hu anhu) reported that the Messenger of Alla!h (s!allalla!hu alayhi wa
sallam) said, One who weeps out of fear of Alla!h, will not enter the Hell until milk returns
back in the udder; and the dust raised on account of fighting in the path of Alla!h and the smoke
of Hell will never exist together. (Tirmidhi)

Do not stand [for prayer] within it - ever. A mosque founded on righteousness from the first
day is more worthy for you to stand in. Within it are men who love to purify themselves; and
Alla!h loves those who purify themselves. (al-Tawbah: 108)

Video: Meeting with All!h and seeing his glorious face.

Many of us will feel a spiritual high now and it may wear off. Dont lose hope. Start off with
realistic goals. Start with the basics, and insh!All!h you will see the change and rise.

Qabeelat Haadi Student Notes Behind the Scenes
September 2012 Shaykh Omar Suleiman

In need of your duas,
Haadi PNT (Professional Notes Team)
Please forgive the team for any mistakes in the notes above. Anything beneficial is from All!h
and any shortcoming are from ourselves and Shay#!n. Barak Allahu Feekum.