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Cause for celebration?

[OneShot Fanfic]
Title: Cause for celebration?
Genre: General/Humour
Author: camaybar
Host: LJ
Rating: T
Disclaimer: Don't own it. But Kubo Tite's filling in for me now.
Summary:
If most of SS were members of the Hitsugaya X Matsumoto community, then this fic would have
been possible. Find out what happens when whole of Seireitei get to know that this hot couple
finally get together..My first attempt at humour so no flames please.

No flames please. Reviews are much appreciated. . .Domo.

-----

Cause for celebration?

It had taken him some time to figure out that he had a ‘thing’ for his light hearted, mischievous
minx of a Fukutaichou and when he finally, reluctantly, grudgingly did concede with the idea that
he craved for her in an exclusive manner, . . . And let the other party know that he did. . . all hell
broke loose . . . was an understatement.

After all, Matsumoto wasn’t one to keep secrets. . . especially after a few drinks. . . her liberties
with her captain in public seemed a bit too liberal.

After a particularly public and irrevocably publicized spectacle…..when doubts rapidly evolved to
conviction. . . Jabbing, teasing etc, etc was anticipated . . . but . . . . added to that…. Some
changes in attitude did happen…

For starters, though not very surprising. Murderous looks from most of the male population of
Seireitei . . . . making Hitsugaya think, no wonder people hated Ichimaru Gin so much.

Girls in general knew better than to mess with Matsumoto in the jealousy war. She had a rock-
hard reputation of being invincible, be it in shooting from the lip or simply kicking ass. Hitsugaya
was very thankful for that.

---

On the home front, Ukitake stopped giving sweets (much to Hitsugaya’s relief, of course! But
Ukitake did shed a few happy tears, "My little shirou has finally come of age. Otou-san is happy".
"Dare da otou-san?") while his best buddy, Shunsui started dishing out his choice of ‘goodies’.

Lingerie, sex toys, Kama Sutra to name a few…the remaining of this list would be too indecent to
mention in Livejournal.com.

Some were parceled to his residence, some to his office, but most often the 8th division head
would prance up to the 10th division head office in full daylight, in full view of the entire staff,
with gaudily wrapped packages, taking especial care that the price tag would stick out at least, to
depict the brand name of the purchase,. . . . leaving nothing left to the imagination.

---

Luckily. she had her called separately. attentive. the fourth division captain did her part. .’ Apparently. “ How bad could it be?” Komamura continued.” He had already turned his head away. Hitsugaya peaked his ears.not. starting with Hitsugaya (still in his teens. “I-I am.sure about- what-you’re asking. he managed to pass off the remaining sessions after that first one. and proceeded to begin one. Hitsugaya almost squeaked. for words of wisdom to pour out. Fortunately. . . you see) as a returning alumnus. “Lick”. .so..” Hitsugaya never ever envisaged that that day would come when he would sit and discuss sex with Komamura Taichou. --- The 10th division became a bit more crowded than usual. he couldn’t get better live specimens for observation than the Juuban-Tai top two. He had mused.Two Topic? ‘When polar opposites unite. lecture he got……or something like that. both of you.who was often seen ‘snooping’ around. “I understand.. Basis. though not very eager. “ You do that. that Shinigami Academy never had a ‘sex education’ class. (Shuuhei Hisagi went on a long vacation to the Bahamas with Iba and a bunch of kogals after the news broke out) One quiet evening. scandalized.” . and chagrined to discover. Komamura-san. he came to know.Shinigami (Human) Behaviour.As if to balance Shunsui’s ‘egging on’. he could almost have lost his woman to …. Matsumoto managed to snag Nemu long enough to extract a plausible reason which was Mayuri had begun a new research project. the older one turned to the much smaller younger one. Starting with. --- Soi Fon wanted nothing to do with the Capitan of 10 tai but with the Vice. as the moon hit the sky and Hitsugaya found himself (he didn’t quite know how) sitting beside the respectable elderly one (alone). much to the curiosity of Hitsugaya. repeating the word with emphasis. Matsumoto was as heterosexual as…. disbelieving his ears.well.much as Yumichika was not. She suddenly seem to remember. Lecture he expected. don’t you? To each other…. another woman. --- Even the gentle but massive(ly hairy) Komamura did not fail to make his mark. begun the wise one.The word is ‘lick’”. for him. ”. Subjects. . “Eh-Eh-xcuse me???!!”. He rattled his brains for a dignified answer but managed to stutter. Later. Mayuri.

. --- Sadly enough. Zaraki Kenpachi made frequent visits to this neighbouring division. He didn’t remember what was said after that. you both have bonded to-”. --- On the other hand.Komamura looked at him quizzically. To the bubblegum haired mini monstrosity’s delight. Renji. She added it to her secret stash of Aizen collectibles. 7 Mega pixels digital camera by a very perceptive member of the press. . --- If you think that SS didn’t have paparazzi. leaving his old passion of targeting Ichigo. ── in a costume which strangely if not grotesquely resembled that of a woe-begotten cupid). Hitsugaya received a special delivery from Hueco Mundo (the courier guy was a harmless hollow.) At the young captain’s protest/ defiance. (Makes you think if Matsumoto made a special request…. Pesky Persistent third wheels!! --- As if that were not enough. Zaraki put up the insurmountable argument. bellowed Hitsugaya at the speaker) which Matsumoto later sneaked out and gifted to Hinamori. remember?) so it was chucked in the trash can. ” Hitsugaya could never stop his ears from reddening at the impact of these words much less let out a squeak after that. Thus. Till his vocal chords would be able to stand the strain. Then think again. Ikkaku and the rest of the gang religiously begun to invite themselves as dinner guests to Hitsugaya’s residence and no amount of kicks. Aizen gifted an authentic voice taped (talk about narcissism!!) invitation to Hueco Mundo for their honeymoon (‘WE ARE NOT GETTING MARRIED!!!’. she was gifted a free telescopic lens equipped. to build up his ‘stamina’. Much to the latter’s annoyance . understandably. finding new (renewed?) interest to combat the new kid in the (‘adulthood’?) block. the ‘star’ couple were somehow left by themselves. Tousen gave out 2 pairs of opaque glasses (??) which sadly no one wanted (Shuuhei is on leave. Ichigo. Then add Yachiru to that. the live tracking device guided the rest of the enthused reporters/camera-men to butt in at the most ‘opportune’ moments when by divine providence. Thanks to that. Tight security was meaningless before the 11th division Fukutaichou.“ what’s not to understand? You lost souls have healed yourself. Hitsugaya never glanced at Matsumoto’s direction in office. is all I can say. blows or DAIGUREN-HYOURINMARU salvos deterred the young crowd. after that. And that was that. but he survived it. Hitsugaya (read ‘stud’) Taichou. from his side. he would have to endure the torture. it was a blur to Hitsugaya. the couple never found time together even after office hours. licking each other’s wounds and through that. . Supposedly. “ Gro’ some hai’ on them b---s an’ ah wull quit.

The purpose of his sudden ‘social call’? – Gifts? No. the atmosphere chilled. Renji. there was a high demand for the couple thanks to the tabloid reports. gift or any sort of communication to him that this matter was in his attention in any way. The most useful thing of all which Hitsugaya surreptitiously consulted (mostly in the loo) . Lecture? No Advice? A word of congratulations? A disclosing of opinion? No. .Hitsugaya-Matsumoto posters. Simply for the unique reason that the latter did not appear nor impart any note. . until. free entry for the lady in a couple to onsens. ("Useful tactic . . the 6th division chief kept his business urges in check for a long time until he could stand it no more. . free men’s socks with lady’s boots. free shaving kit with women’s shower gel . . . . . --- All in all. He had to propose a contract to buy the rights to exclusively market all Hitsugaya x Matsumoto products. there were ‘Eat for two. . . . Apparently. Many a Shinigami’s eyes almost fell of their sockets as the flower-Zanpakutou wielder gracefully strode across the hall of the building..factfile on Matsumoto Rangiku. Ichigo and the rest of the gang would take care of sales and distribution (so THAT’S WHY they so persistently hung out with Matsumoto-Hitsugaya. ready to hit it and clear the building if she got the slightest wind. there suddenly begun a boom of ‘couple’ offers.free Fundoshi with Hiyoku. no. . ". otherwise he was seriously beginning to question his taste buds’ opinion on Matsumoto’s cooking) while Urahara Kisuke would handle manufacture and supply. . he agreed) --- As for rest of Seireitei. She looked at the fire alarm glass. . The teenager’s eyebrows hit the ceiling when the contents (of the small print) dawned on him. Kuchiki wordlessly laid down a single sheet of paper on the table for the apprehensive Hitsugaya Taichou to gingerly peruse. the day the heir of the Kuchiki clan graced the 10th division with his presence- For the first time in Hitsugaya’s tenure of captaincy. free Ken with Barbie. . . Even Matsumoto grew apprehensive that she would have to see the 10th division building destroyed due to Captain vs Captain showdown. that Hitsugaya’s top would blow off. Hitsugaya thought he found his new best friend in the strong and silent Byakuya. Seemingly.That day. Hitsugaya could see all the signatures scribbled in closely leaving enough space for his and Matsumoto’s. Ignoring the general ‘Buy One Get One free’. Ikkaku. no. something begging to get out. Byakuya. T-shirts.One thing that Matsumoto didn’t get to see was what Gin provided. couples this year sure saved a lot of money. And the information that Matsumoto's brain works on Reverse Psychology. Hitsugaya felt a constriction in his throat. buttons and the likes. especially the portion which described the ‘moves’ she liked. pay for one’ for couples in a restaurant.

and she breathed a sigh of relief. “I have a girl-friend. a boy at that. the General suddenly turned dismissive. it’s all very early. and he may as well come forward. Sir”. she tapped her fingers with folded arms. looked at the boy with interest. it wasn’t as if he had come across anyone who wasn’t interested in his now ’blooming’ love-life. . “ So you do like her. a wrinkled old man in the midst of work? “ Girlfriend.typically. He was going to lose again. It was still day. from the chibi-Taichou. answer this…” he suddenly. “ Was it you who asked her or was it she who asked you?” Hitsugaya was now seriously confused. But he could not but answer after all. very well”. waited for an obvious affirmation. ---- “ So you have taken a wife” Hitsugaya grimaced. . And then she turned to Byakuya. partly due to the General’s attitude. Yamamoto nodded to himself. wondering where this all was leading to. Determination in her eyes. “ Okay. “ So Kuchiki Taichou wants a deal…huh?”. . Kuchiki sweat-dropped. He had lost to this woman before. he said between gritted teeth. When… the 13th seat suddenly rushed in with the news Yama-sama wants Hitsu-sama to meet him. eh?” “Y-yes”. But it was impossible. his stick hidden under the cover rather than brandished forward as he usually did in Captain meetings. Hitsugaya acquiesced. face angled at him. you say.” “Harumph!”. Hitsugaya looked back with slight surprise. “N-No Sir. “Eh-? –Ah I beg your pardon?” Yamamoto impatiently repeated. urgently! Her boss left the room. “ Very well.“Oh!” He gathered he was asking about ‘going out’. I-I mean. “ No. “ Was it you who said it or she?” Hitsugaya blinked. or so he thought!. .” “ Hmmm? Then what is this I hear?” Hitsugaya didn’t want to beat around the bush. but the General couldn’t see that because the other’s head was bowed. and what was he askin. so you have no intention of making a wife out of her??” Hitsugaya almost missed a beat. Hitsugaya had begun to wonder whether Yamamoto might be drunk. this was very unlike him. finding no other fitful answer. now. he was a mere captain and also. I did not say that. he was well-covered with a cloak. Sir. Sir. Why am I discussing about my squeeze in the middle of the afternoon with my boss. and this was the General.

Then he snapped. And I win. where this was going to. “What’s going on?”. “ Aya! I had a bet with my wife. still smiling (Hitsugaya thought.”.I think I did. then he heard the last part of the General’s mumbling. The old one suddenly came to life. . “ Odd! he still has some teeth remaining”). Hitsugaya said matter-of-factly after a few moments of thought. " It was him and not her who popped the question. pulling back the cloak. everyone’s interest dwindled. “Did you hear?”. Hitsugaya mumbled. . A bit too distracted to comprehend. . It seemed so long ago. HA HA HA!”. “Ah.(to himself)I don’t have to cook tonight” Hitsugaya was puzzled at first. Yamamoto then turned to him. He let out a toothless laugh in joy.Hitsugaya reflected. with all things going on. he pulled an open cell phone from underneath. Yamamoto told the other end. they too hardly had any time or situation to be together and had mutually agreed to stay like this until somehow. ----- AFTERWORD -------- That day was remembered as ICE AGE 2.