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Ashley Chagnovich
Professor Deidre Tyler
Sociology 1020- Social Problems
27 June 2014
Working Mothers: Whats Our Struggle?
I feel like Im being pulled in a million directions! One mother said, I am
constantly on the go and my day is never done. My husband isnt much help with the
kids and he doesnt like to cook or clean. These are just a few statements from the six
different working mothers I interviewed.
A century ago in the United States, most people did not think women should work
at all, at least not for pay. A womans place is in the home seemed to be the mindset of
most, believing women should be home cooking, cleaning, and tending to the children.
Now, in 2014, 71% of all mothers are working in the United Sates (ABC News: Working
Moms, Elizabeth Vargas) and the numbers are on the rise.
That is a drastic change and with drastic change comes criticism, stress and guilt.
In this paper I will be discussing the problems working mothers face on a daily basis. I
will discuss their daily life, thoughts, jobs and what its truly like for mothers in the
working community.
If 71% of mothers are working, that means they are spending at least 40 hours a
week away from their home, children and husband. What does that mean for the home
life? Whos holding down the fort? Who is cooking dinner, cleaning the house and
getting the kids ready for bed? Surprisingly enough, the working mother is still managing
most of the housework, this is why housework is sometimes called womens second
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shift (U.S Department of Labor, 2011). On average, women spend considerably more
time doing housework than men. Employed women married with children clean on
average 15.4 hours per week, compared to employed men married with children who
clean 8.9 hours per week. Leann says, I only spend two hours a night with my son. I am
always worrying about work at home and home at work. My husband helps out as much
as he can, but he works long hours. I am usually the one who cooks, cleans, and takes
care of the yard and everything else. Its hard. But you do what you have to do.
Cherie says she often feels guilty because she only sees her girls two hours per
night. After picking them up from daycare at 5:30pm, its off to cook dinner, give baths,
have story time and go to bed. She says she never takes time for herself because she feels
guilty. Her husband is extremely helpful and plays a strong role in parenting.
Other moms point out a different struggle. Fighting traffic to get home so I can
run my kids to their various practices, picking up dinner on the go and doing all my
checking up while driving in the car is how I spend my weeknights, said Jen. Or how
about the short days at school or the special days off that my work wont recognize? she
asked, I have to rearrange my entire schedule or get a babysitter.
When I asked Denyce, another working mother of three she said, I hate working
weekends when my kids are involved in sports. I never get to see their games. Their
father does, but I never get to see them. They say they understand, but they also admit
they wish I could come watch them play. As I did more research I found that Denyce
was not the only mother feeling left out, many others, myself included, felt shafted and
left out as their children and husband got to play. Denyce also said, I never got off
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work when I got home. I still made dinner, cleaned, bathed, helped with homework and
bedtime. My husband doesnt help much with any of that.
A mother of two, Beth, says mornings are hectic, as she has to get two little ones
ready and herself. Making breakfast for both children and her husband, she also prepares
lunches for everyone, except herself. Beth can never take a day off from work, she says,
because all of her time must be saved for when one of the kids is sick. Paid time off is
hard to accrue and goes quick if youre not careful, so its work, work, and work so when
the time comes you have the time available.
What happens when you are criticized and ridiculed for being a working mother?
Believe it or not that does happen, just quit your job or just stay home are a few
comments working mothers hear all the time (ABC News: Working Moms, Elizabeth
Vargas), but its not that simple. Most households need a second income just to pay the
bills; its not feasible anymore to live on one income (in most cases).
Unfortunately its not just outside of the workplace that women are subjected to
harsh remarks; they are experiencing this type of treatment within their jobs as well.
Sexual Harassment refers to unwanted comments, gestures, or physical contact of a
sexual nature and about 3% of women claim that they have been harassed on the job in
the last year and about 50% of women claim they have received unwanted sexual
attention (NORC, 2011:1508). Men in positions of power are free to coerce sex from
women they supervise. They can pressure a subordinate for sex by threatening a poor
report or their job if she refuses. This is an example of quid pro quo (the Latin words
mean one thing in return for another).
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Aside from sexual harassment in the work place, women often fall behind their
male counterparts. Greater family obligations, sick children, school plays, parent-teacher-
conferences, etc. mean that women spend more time out of the labor force during
important career-building years. Women also suffer from gender discrimination. This
means employers pay women less than men simply because they can get away with it.
This is obviously illegal, and equal opportunity laws have been set into motion to stop the
deliberate double standard but more subtle discrimination continues (Benokraitis &
Feagin, 1995:85). Sociologists use the term glass ceiling to refer to the subtle
discrimination that blocks the movement of women into promotions. According to one
recent survey, just 16 of the Fortune 500 companies in the U.S. have woman as their
chief executive officer (Catalyst, 2011).
It seems to me that working mothers will always be deprived of rising to the top
in the workforce. We are the nurturers, the caretaker, the taxi cab driver, the chef, and the
counselor. According to the six mothers that I interviewed and the articles quoted in my
text, we are also the ones who attend the majority of school programs, tend to family
emergencies, and take care of sick children; thus abandoning our career and missing out
on advancement opportunities. Unfortunately, until there is a way to provide affordable
daycare, paid time off, etc. in all companies big and small, women will always have the
short end of the stick.