The Easter Invasion

Written by Joshua Powlison

Ronnie Believer in Easter Bunny, energetic
Poe Skeptic, more cautious
Easter Bunny The Easter Bunny
Herp Alien from Outer Space
Derp Alien from Outer Space
Berp Alien from Outer Space
Scene 1 (Backyard)
A tree is usta!e "ro# $S% &onnie and Poe are hidin! behind it% They have an Easter
basket
'$( 'i!hts )
*+( Birds chirin!, #ornin! noises
The Easter Bunny hops out from SL
Bunny Hello, !ir"s# Hello, grass# Hello, tree# $not truthfully% &t's another totally
regular Easter "ay# Don't you love it( )one of the chil"ren shoul" !e up
yet*** it's an hour till sunrise*
Bunny places four eggs evenly spaced across the stage.
Bunny One yar" at a time*** here +e go#
Bunny hops offstage. Ronnie and Poe come from behind the tree.
Ronnie See# See, Poe# & tol" you she +as real#
Poe & guess* & ,ust "i"n't kno+ that ra!!its lai" eggs*
Ronnie She "oesn't# She gets her eggs from the Easter -hickens#
Poe The Easter -hickens(
Ronnie .ep# An" she's not a ra!!it, she's a !unny* They're "ifferent*
Poe All right* /ell no+ that +e've spotte" the !unny, +hat "o +e "o(
Ronnie -ollect the eggs#
Poe /hy(
Ronnie Because there's can"y in them#
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Poe $trying to figure it out% So "o the chickens eat can"y an" then lay the
eggs(
Ronnie )o, it's magic, Poe# -ome on#
The two of them collect the eggs, and put them in a baset.
Poe There aren't very many eggs***
Ronnie 2ust !e the increasing population3 fe+er eggs to go aroun"*
Poe But +oul"n't there !e more Easter chickens !y no+ too(
Ronnie Don't over4think it, Poe*
*+( Saceshi "allin! and e-lodin! S&
Poe and Ronnie react
Poe /hat +as that(#
Ronnie &'m not sure* Some!o"y's coming#
Poe and Ronnie tae the baset and hide behind the tree
Easter Bunny hops onstage from SR, terrified
Bunny Eeep#
Easter Bunny starts hopping SL
!erp, "erp, and Berp stumble onstage from SR
Derp Augh# $notices the Easter Bunny%
Berp There she is#
Herp 5et !ack here#
!erp, "erp, and Berp chase the Easter Bunny off SL, comes bac onstage with Easter
Bunny captured, go #S
Derp /hat "o you have to say for yourself(
Bunny & "i" +hat & coul"# & "on't kno+ +hat happene"#
Berp Apparently that +asn't enough, Easter Bunny#
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Herp .ou're coming +ith us#
Bunny )ooo#
!erp, "erp, and Berp tae Easter Bunny of SR. Poe and Ronnie come from behind the
tree
Poe /hat +ere those( Some ki"s in Hallo+een costumes(
Ronnie & think they +ere aliens*
Poe But aliens "on't e7ist#
Ronnie An" neither "oes the Easter Bunny, isn't that right Poe( -ome on3 +e've
got to help her#
Ronnie and Poe run SR.
'$( 'i!hts down
Scene . ($rashed Saceshi)
'$( 'i!hts u
$ spaceship is crashed SR, and the Easter Bunny is in a cage beside it. "erp and Berp
are standing beside, looing over the wrecage, while !erp is busy trying to wor on it.
Derp Does our insurance cover this(
Berp &t only covers acci"ents +ithin our gala7y*
Derp /e shoul"'ve investe" in !etter thrusters* Any luck, Herp(
Herp There's nothing & can "o* /hen +e crashe", the 8ua"ratic reactor
"issipate" into its in"ivi"ual molecules, +hich cause" the gamma tu!es to***
Derp Speak in plain Blorfian*
Herp The engine e7plo"e"*
Derp Oh* &s that !a"(
Berp .ou mean +e're stran"e" until the others get here(
Herp &'m afrai" so*
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Bunny Ho+ many of you are there(
Herp That's of no concern to you, Bunny*
Bunny $offen"e"% & "aresay***
Poe and Ronnie run onstage from SL
Poe :ree;e# .ou're all un"er arrest#
Berp /ho are you(
Poe /e live in the house "o+n the street*
Ronnie <et the Bunny go#
Herp )ever#
Derp The Easter Bunny ruine" our plans for +orl" "omination#
Herp An" my !eautiful spaceship#
Ronnie /hat plans for +orl" "omination(
Herp $smug% /oul"n't you like to kno+*
Berp Oh, +hat coul" it hurt, Herp( /e have innumera!le spaceships or!iting
the planet at this very moment*
Herp But +e nee"e" to place lan"ing markers all over the glo!e !efore +e coul"
inva"e, an" +ante" it "one sooner than later*
Herp Santa has an army of elves3 he's no pushover* The Easter Bunny,
ho+ever***
Easter Bunny gulps
Poe Easter Bunny, +hy "i" you go along +ith these kooks(#
Bunny They promise" that if & "i" +hat they sai", +e coul" still cele!rate Easter#
Derp But you "i"n't "o +hat +e sai"# .ou kne+ our instructions3 place the
lan"ing markers evenly apart so +e can lan" safely*
Berp )o+ look at our ship***
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Herp Do you kno+ ho+ much +e spent on that paint ,o!(#
Ronnie $takes an egg out of the !asket, sho+s it to them% Di" the lan"ing markers
happen to look like this(
The three aliens stare in awe
Poe /e collecte" them earlier this morning#
Ronnie &t looks like +e have some !argaining chips* <et the Bunny go*** no+*
Poe Or else#
Berp /e have more of those lan"ing markers* They mean nothing to us*
Derp .eah, those aren't even the latest version#
Herp This is a +retche" planet, an" +e +ill inva"e it to make it a peaceful one,
un"er Blorfian rule#
Ronnie Our planet, +retche"( /hat makes you say that(
Bunny .eah, & mean, it has !unnies* Are !unnies +retche"(
Pause
Herp /ell*** +e kno+ it's +retche" !ecause of our research*** an" stuff***
Berp .ou kno+, Herp*** it is pretty cool ho+ these t+o came to try to save the
Easter Bunny* An" the !unny is kin"a cute*
Herp Are you si"ing +ith them no+, Berp(
Bunny Oh, there's a lot of great things a!out this planet# Have you ever ha"
chocolate(
Derp -hocolate(
Bunny Here, & have a couple of chocolate eggs on me*** $reaches into her pocket*
Pulls out some chocolate eggs%
Easter Bunny hands chocolate eggs to the aliens. They try them. Berp gasps in awe
Berp This is ama;ing#
Derp /hat "i" you say this is calle"(
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Bunny -hocolate#
Hurp Do you have more of it(
Bunny .ou !et#
Easter Bunny hands out more chocolate, Berp snatches them, eats more
Berp /o+***
Herp That settles it# /e'll inva"e the planet*** for its chocolate#
Bunny )o#
Ronnie .ou kno+, Earth is the only planet +ho kno+s ho+ to make chocolate like
this* &f you ,ust inva"e it an" "estroy our +ays, the kno+le"ge of chocolate making may
!e lost*
Berp Derp, may!e +e shoul" get to kno+ +hat +e're trying to conform !efore
+e "eci"e to conform it*
Poe /e also have movie theaters, popcorn, the internet***
Derp /hat are these things that you speak of(
Ronnie /oul" you like a tour of planet Earth(
Berp & +oul"#*** if there's more chocolate on the +ay*
Bunny <et me out, an" you can have all the chocolate you +ant#
Berp lets the Easter Bunny out
Bunny /he+# That feels !etter#
Herp $speaks into +rist% -all the invasion of Planet Earth off*
Poe /oohoo# /e "i" it# $high fives Ronnie%
Bunny $to Poe an" Ronnie% Thank you#
Berp $to Easter Bunny% So, +hat is it that you normally "o on Easter(
Bunny ?sually & sprea" chocolate eggs all over the +orl"#
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Berp An" +e +ere stopping that(#
Derp &'m rea"y for this tour* So +here shoul" +e go first(
Ronnie <et's go "o+nto+n, there's tons of great things to "o there#
Herp Do+nto+n( &t looke" so "ull from up a!ove*
Berp /e shoul" check these places !efore +e make assumptions in the future*
Poe $looking at the spaceship%'ll call a to+ truck for your ship*
Derp A to+ truck( /hat's that(
Ronnie One thing at a time#
Bunny &'ll lea" the +ay#
Easter Bunny hops SL, others follow
'$( Blackout
$urtain $all
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