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TODD Manifesto Notes

- Lots of varying tips and tricks
Mental Models
- Value & Comfort
- Social Capital
- Escalation
- Acting Through Purpose
- Direct vs. Indirect
- Compliance
Screening Blueprint
- F.R.E.D. model
Emotional Connection
- Qualification
- Comfort building
Physical Connection
- Including final words
Being the dancing monkey (entertaining and high energy) hooks her on the entertainment but doesnt
hook her on you as a person.
Think about what it should look like at the end of a pick-up. It shouldnt look like you were trying to force
and convince her. She should be an active and willing participant in the escalation.
So be sure to start with the end in mind! Get the girl to invest, get her to chase you.
(That doesnt mean theres never resistance. If there isnt, youre only getting that small segment of girls
and your reach is very limited. Some resistance is a regular part of sexual interactions.)
Game isnt something you do to her, its an experience you have with her and give her that allows her to
invest in you and chase you.
Guys often get excited and immediately try to make out and have sex when they enter the (bed)room. If
you have a lot sex, that should not be a moment of extreme excitement.
Its like a movie: The last 5 minutes dont mean anything without the rest of the story. Make the whole
interaction an experience like that. That also means you should push her away a bit sometimes to make
her wonder about the end of the movie. If you only push and never let her chase and invest, she already
knows how it will end, its not interesting for her.

The message should be Maybe I will, maybe I wont. It creates the experience, the wonder about the
end of the movie. She will think Why didnt he?.
It should feel like it just happens and not some pre-planned thing. The girl doesnt want to feel
slutty (or used for just sex) about it.
Central idea in game: Sex is good, both men and women love sex, but a man should make a girl feel not
slutty about it. Thats most of the game. A big part of game is taking the responsibility off of her
Guys also often try to get the girl in the bedroom instantly. This lessens your scope. The few girls that
are down for that will be down for a bit of slower approach (as long as youre escalating), and youll get a
lot of others that arent instantly down too.
Also remember that most sex doesnt have to start in a bed. It may finish there, but probably wont start
there. That way, its more like it just happened.
Broaden your scope. If you ask every girl hey lets fuck theres only a very tiny amount that will
agree. That doesnt mean anything about whether or not you have chemistry. If you take different steps,
your scope broadens. A lot of game is doing things in an intelligent manner that will get you the highest
possible percentage chance of succeeding.
The least chance of anything happening is when you dont escalate at all.
Key components for sex:
- Youre alone enough to not get caught.
- Shes aroused enough to do it.
This is what game essentially is about.
Key concept of escalation: 2 steps forward, 1 step back. You always want to be pushing forward to a
level that shes ok with, but no further. If you push further, you get a no which makes things take
longer. Escalate to the point just short of no.
Ideally the girl likes you emotionally but also logically (she took committing action). Logically means that,
for example, she said she likes you, touched you, etc. Shes committed to some degree.
Escalation may feel somewhat uncomfortable for her, but ideally it should feel worse for her that youre
backing off and not touching her.
Point of no return: Youre close to having sex, and if it doesnt happen at that point she wont ever want
to anymore. You better damn well have sex from that point. E.g.: Fingering, dirty talk, etc. Before that
point she should show signs of actively participating in the escalation. That should be taken care of
before the point of no return.
Take your cloths off first. Same message (were going to have sex), but she wont hold your shirt to keep
it on, in contrast to her keeping her shirt on.

Escalation isnt so much about what you do, but the message you convey. The idea is to convey the
same thing without making it her fault, without asking for compliance.
Dont go for it, asking for compliance, but tease her so she wants it. Theres nothing to resist because
you didnt actually do it, so theres mental space for her to want what was insinuated. Psychologically it
might be even more arousing than the real thing. And again, youre conveying the sexual message
without asking for compliance.
Resistance moves:
- Take her hands, pin them up above her head with your hand. Not very hard, but enough to help her
pretend she couldnt help it. Also, the dominance is arousing.
- Preemptive freeze out: A normal freeze out is a very reactive move, a bit butthurt. Break it off just
before the point of no return if youre in doubt it will go on towards sex.
Be attuned to her emotions and how they manifest. She wont notice her slightly tensing up most of the
time, so if you do, thats not a no but instead shows you are attuned to what she feels. Same goes for
slight movement/resistance in her hands when you are holding her hands above her head.
Dont be scared of hearing no. It might happen but just try to minimize it, not prevent it
completely. Trying to prevent no completely will stifle you.
Make the distinction between a soft and a hard no. Soft means: Giggly and because she doesnt want
to seem easy, but she actually does like what youre doing. Hard means that shell call the police for rape
if you keep going (she really doesnt want it).
Letting it happen naturally is more effective than forcing it, going for soft no all the time, etc. It shows
youre not needy and just there for the moment, the experience, the enjoyment, the fun. That vibe feels
good for the girl. So dont treat escalation as a checkbox, just enjoy the flow. For example: Some girls
wont kiss before sex (a small fraction). But that doesnt mean they wont have sex. It might seem
necessary on the checklist but even that isnt. In the case of the kiss, shes actively participating so she
feels bad (slutty) about it.
A million different paths can lead to sex, be flexible. No can just mean not this way as well. Early
rejection of a number for example, doesnt mean nothing will happen later (sex). Even a harsh rejection
can become something if you meet up again or just stick with it. Be calibrated.
Mental models
Value & Comfort. You need both in order to sleep together. Value means you have good genes,
confidence, youre a badass, whatever. Having social proof, self-worth, abundance (i.e. it doesnt have to
work), high standards, self-amusement etc. all convey that you are of high value. Comfort means that
she can participate in your badassness. If youre a badass and you just dont care about her, ditch her
after sex and such, thats not good for her.
At any point in the set, you need either more comfort, value, or both. At the right ratio and amount, you
would already be having sex. As long as the ratio is within a certain acceptable range, shell allow you to
build value and comfort, but if its too much of either the interaction is basically over. If its going well,

youre making out and all that, maybe shes even escalating on you, but then shes suddenly gone, there
was plenty value but not enough comfort. Shes highly stimulated but she doesnt trust you, she
associates you with quick fun. Too much comfort with too little value means you have a conversation and
you know her deep secrets and all that, but when you try to escalate she doesnt accept it. She doesnt
see you that way and rather sees you as a brother or friend. Or she only stays in the interaction if you
provide her with things.
Social Capital. At any given point in the interaction there are things you can get away with and things you
cant. Example: If you know someone for 5 minutes and that person pisses you off, youre probably done
with him/her. If someone pisses you off after 6 months of knowing each other, thats probably a minor
issue and youll move past it pretty easily. Typically, the more and longer you know someone, the more
shared experiences you have, the more social capital you have. Also, the more things someone complied
to with you, the more social capital you have with that person. Example: You put out your hand for her
to grab, as escalation. However, she doesnt grab it. What happened is that you dont have enough social
capital, you tried to spend it and actually decreased it because she didnt accept. Before you try again,
youll have to build it up a bit more again. On the other hand, if she accepts, its like an investment
and her commitment causes your social capital to go way up. This means that physicality can increase
social capital greatly, IF its accepted well. If its not accepted, it can actually decrease your social capital.
Physicality is essential of course, but you have to smart about it. This goes for physical escalation but
also for other forms of escalation.
In all cases, try to escalate in a way that you are free to do so but at the same time you avoid a hard
no (costs more social capital). Example: Youre saying hi to a girl, and you could just talk, shake her
hand or hug her. Most guys will either just stand there and talk or shake her hand, both because its safe.
Or, theyll overtly hug her. The first is too indirect, the latter can easily cause resistance. A good middle
road is putting your hand out in a way that suggests to her to come in for a hug. If she comes in for the
hug, you hug her. If she doesnt, you drop your hand and go to or continue talking as if nothing
happened. The chances here of hugging her are the same as when you overtly hug her, but when it
doesnt, its not a failed attempt, so there was no hard no. (Just like with Hand of God (explained later),

you suggest physicality in a confident yet low-key, low-risk manner, and when it doesnt work out you
just go on as if nothing happened. Its no big deal.) Another example: Hold your hands palms up and tap
the bottom of her hands with yours, with the intention of her taking your hands (after which you go to
handclasps etc.). Its mostly subconscious for her. And if she doesnt, nothings wrong, you can just let it
go and keep talking.
There are 4 types of escalation:
- Physical escalation. Getting more physical and getting closer to a girl and to sex.
- Verbal escalation. Saying risqu or sexual things, or things that show a lot of intent and man-towoman attitude verbally. Its like the difference between talking about the weather and talking about how
youre going to fuck her.
- Logistical escalation. Getting closer to a place where sex can happen. You start out in a club or another
crowded area, but then you go to a less crowded area like the bar. Then, you move to a place to sit
down where youre close together and more isolated. Then you take her outside, etc.
- Topical escalation. Not necessarily about showing interest in her, but making the nature of the
conversation and the topics more sexual and more about we instead of I and you.
You can escalate on all these levels during the interaction. As long as theres escalation its good, its not

a problem if one form of escalation lags behind for a while. Just keep escalating. Different forms of
escalation can fit different situations. However, theres a limit and if one kind of escalation gets too much
attention it can get weird (goes back to the Value & Comfort thing).
To what extent am I acting through my own purpose and intentions? Ask yourself if youre saying the
things you want to say, or the things you think she wants to hear. As soon as you micromanage what
youre saying and think ahead based on what you think she wants to hear, youll be less charismatic and
smooth, and youll start to show bad little mannerisms. So whenever youre thinking about what to say to
please her, block those thoughts and shift the topic to something irrelevant or even opposite to that.
If you notice you are saying something that bores you, even when its technically better to finish it, its
actually best to cut it off and switch to something that youre engaged in at that moment. Even when the
technical game is less good that way, your attitude is better, so more congruent and confident. Thats
more important than the content of what youre saying.
Tylers old list of 25 things you shouldnt do, showed that its generally better to focus on what you
should do than what you shouldnt do. Thinking about what you shouldnt do makes you nervous and
Most sets that are lost, are lost because something wasnt according to these 3 models (Value & Comfort,
Social Capital, Acting Through Purpose.).
A noobish 4th model is, part of Acting Through Purpose actually, is: Am I man-to-woman enough, am I
escalating. Escalation should be a foregone conclusion but it can be something to keep in mind when
youre starting out.
If you do these things properly, its actually hard to fuck up a set. That being said, its not so easy to do
these things properly, hence practice. Also, these models can help you to analyze sets and check what
went well and how to repeat that, or what went wrong and how to avoid that and/or correct it.
Keep the closing-part in mind. Theres a difference between good and effective game. A lot of guys might
be good at spiking emotion and getting buying temperature up, but they dont get laid. This is because
they start off with a bad premise of the girl being on a pedestal and they needing to be entertaining and
amazing enough to get her.
The worst opener can work, what you open with content-wise doesnt matter. What does matter:
- That you are loud enough to get her attention. Be a bit louder than necessary.
- Your vibe is very important.
- What you say immediately after the open.
Being quiet instead of loud seems creepy, because it indicates youre afraid of others hearing it. That fear
sub-communicates youre doing something wrong/weird/creepy in your opinion. Being a bit loud (clearly
perceivable) indicates that what youre doing is fine, normal, acceptable.

Direct vs. Indirect philosophy of opening.

Direct: Hey youre cute I wanted to talk to you, who are you? More direct: Hey youre fucking hot, I
want you., this can work too. Physicality on the open is also very direct.
Indirect: Hey I need your opinion on something or Wow the music here is really good, etc. Basically
indirect is something thats not about you and her or sex.
Go as direct as you can get away with, but no more than that. Too direct means youre too obvious and
asking for too much compliance and she may feel slutty. But being as direct as possible makes the
following steps easier, because the transition to sexuality and escalation is smaller. For this reason, also
try to be physical from the open if you can.
When it comes to opinion openers: Use the opinion opener (Hey real quick, I need your opinion on
something or Hey, I need you for a second) to get the girl to stop and as a premise for the
conversation, but then transition to what you actually want to say.
Being direct saves time. Spending less time on the different steps is better because at some point youll
run out. Friends will come and try to take her away, the club closes, etc.
The more direct you are, the more intense and exciting the situation is. A more intense interaction is
harder for the girl to leave. More intensity means less easily distracted.
The more intense the environment, the better it is to get physical quickly so you can trump the
environments intensity. In such an environment (like a nightclub), being physical is also more accepted
so youll get away with it much easier. Physicality is also an important/necessary part of communication
in that environment because verbal communication is harder to do. Also, theres already more physical
arousal for a girl so you should start higher in that energy already.
In a loud club, theres more urgency and loudness and youre competing with the environment. Because
of the environment, youre getting a relatively low amount of successful opens, similar to when youre
very direct. So you might as well be very direct anyway and save time. So be direct in your statements,
be physical, and be persistent.
In daygame, it will often be much less acceptable to open very physical and also much less necessary
because verbal communication is much more possible and usable. Daygame will probably be a bit more
gradual anyway.
Persistence on the open is very important, especially with the hottest girls and tough environments. Dont
be a broken record, vary your angles. Infield example: Hey! *girls have jumpscare* Wow wow hold
on, that was a bit extreme, lets try that again. Hi, Im...
Usually with the hot girls you wont have a great open from the first word you say. But by being
persistent and doing a secondary opener, the reaction will probably be a lot better.
Example: Girls first words on the open were Youre too short for me, thats a dealbreaker, sorry. Yet
Todd ended up sleeping with her. His reaction (deliberate misinterpretation): Too short for what? Oh
thats so sweet but I just wanted to talk. I dont want to get physical/sexual yet, youre so silly. etc.
You should realize that the initial resistance is not about you but because of bullshit societal constructs,
causing her to react the way she does. So push through that.

Persistence metaphor;
You basically have 3 tiers of clubs:
1. Everyone gets in.
2. They try to be exclusive in their style.
3. Theyre super exclusive and even celebs have trouble getting in.
The bouncer of the second kind will ask you things like are you on the guestlist or something. Most
guys will say Ah, no and theyll walk away, feeling theyre unworthy of the club. If you look the
bouncer in the eye and just say no, just me like you deserve to be in there anyway, youll usually get
in. They dont actually have a guestlist but the best way to keep the wrong guys out of the club is by
faking theres a guestlist.
Same thing with a hot girl. Its basically a screening procedure to be not so positive on the first open. The
guys without persistence, which she doesnt want, will walk off. The guys who try again, because they go
for what the want and believe in themselves, are the ones shes left with.
Example: Hey *rejection* Wait, yeah I know I seem unattainable but Im actually really sweet, hi Im
Youre very cute.
Of course, there are limits to that, if you keep trying 6 times while shes saying Im going to call the
bouncer, Ill kill you etc. that might be a bit much and a next set is a better idea. But to go that second
time is very important to show enough entitlement. Kind of a I know what youre doing and I
understand but no, Im me, nice to meet you. attitude.
How you know how direct you can be: When looking at a set, wonder how much compliance you can get
from them (less compliance needed is better/easier). Compliance being: Them changing what theyre
doing to suit your purpose.
Extremes: Least compliance needed would be a girl sitting at a table with nobody around, especially with
a laptop and such on the table. In this case, it would be extremely hard for her to leave the situation,
even if youd be obnoxious and such. You can get away with a lot in this case.
Most compliance needed: Girl in a chain of people with guys and girls in a nightclub getting physically
dragged through by bouncers/hosts. In this situation you going direct and her complying would seem
very slutty for her.
Girls are more compliant when:
- Committed to a situation.
- Bored/unoccupied.
- Happy.
Girls are less compliant when:
- With guys.
- In a group with which shes engaged.
- With a medium-sized group (with 2-4 girls)
(With a large group, 10+ people, shes not missed so thats not such a big problem)
In a group of 2, 3 or 4, in which she seems pretty engaged, you probably need to open the whole group.
Its a low-compliance situation, so theres likely to be resistance if you pull her away. You avoid such
resistance by talking to the whole group. In a case where the group is bigger and she doesnt seem very
engaged, its probably easier to get compliance without opening the group. It also gives you the
opportunity to go more direct. But always be aware of what the group is doing. If theres any resistance

from the group, you go them before they go to you, to prevent that resistance. When a girl likes you and
shes fine with you taking her away, the group might resist (even more so if she really likes you). When
you notice shes on, dont think How do I get her more on because shes on enough. You should be
thinking How do I not get into trouble with the group for what Im about to do. Another situation is
when the group already gives you certain indicators (like looking at you in a certain way), then you might
get more compliance already so you can go direct. But as soon as youve done that, engage with the
group quickly to disarm whatever might happen.
Logistically, you dont have to get into the group and be with your back towards them to face her. You
can also turn her around and get her out of the group to face you, so youre both outside the group. Its
better not to grab or pull, but subtly tap her shoulder/arm and nudge (requires less compliance) and let
your body language indicate what the idea is, so she turns to you.
If its one guy and one girl, who are kind of into each other, compliance will be very low when opening.
To get your foot in the door in that case, use a distraction opener. Find something in the environment
that you use as a distraction and an excuse to bump into the set. It has to look like its not an opener at
all, rather like coincidence. After that, you physically come in between the guy and the girl and open the
girl a second time normally.
Dont aim to open a 100% of the girls you approach. They wont all be receptive, which is a good thing.
That way, you screen out a lot of girls you dont want to be talking to anyway. Instead, you are left with
the 70% or 50% of girls youll have a bigger chance of chemistry with, and youll have screened out girls
that not receptive so youll usually spend less time in the sets you do open (which is a good thing, as
mentioned before).
Thats also why game that may look high-percentage might not be that way when it comes to actually
getting laid.
If you want to get laid on a particular night, you should open very directly on your approaches. Not so
direct that youll get rejected by every girl, but at least like twice as direct as youd normally would. Then
youll know very quickly if a girl is on or off. If its on, try to make it work, but if not you just move on
to the next set to try again.
One Vegas Immersion student has this direct style all the time and has great success with it.
Good strategy will often trump good technique. Strategy is essential.
3 openers (examples of varying compliance):
- Just walk over and having normal conversation. Low compliance. Hey how are you Nice smile Oh I
can see youre trouble. Decent eye-contact, decent vibe, not very loud. Instantly showed some intent,
got into her head a bit. However, it will still take a lot of work this way.
- The Claw. High compliance. You physically grab the girl and pull her over, telling her shes fucking hot
or whatever (very direct). Risky and potentially slutty for the girl. What you shouldnt do: Not being
dominant, but unsure of yourself like please, please come here, please. It conveys youre doing
something wrong (like being quiet) and, like a self-fulfilling prophecy, makes her feel uncomfortable
about it. If youre doing it because you want to, you think its fun, you feel like youre the man, its way
less awkward. The other way of doing it wrong is being too rough, pulling the girl in harshly (nearly
leaving marks on the arm, so to say). Its hostile and scary. What you want to do is be firm, but soft. She

can go and theres enough freedom for that But at the same time youre pretty committed and insistent
on not letting her go (up to a certain limit) when she tries. So assertive and soft at the same time.
(Its a metaphor for game: You should be assertive and leading but also delicate and soft, never forcing.
It should always feel like its just happening, not her responsibility.)
- Hand of God. Medium compliance. You stick out your hand, clearly suggesting to her that she should
grab it. But she has the choice. On one level, it requires less compliance because its less forceful and less
slutty, but on another it requires more because youre getting positive feedback from her. Like in closing,
you want her to be participating. The difference with the Claw is that it arouses her because its dominant
but it doesnt require any participation from her. Another difference with the Claw is how it looks to
the/her social group. The Claw might be aggressive and forceful to them, possibly causing them to act up
against you. With the Hand of God, shes participating so the group cant object so much against that.
(This is more important with a group of guys than with a group of girls.)
An example of the extreme non-compliance opener is going indirect, for example the opinion opener.
Something with which it is almost impossible to create resistance. Added to that, you could for example
do a false time constraint, meaning you say youll have to go pretty quickly anyway. But once you got
the attention and some compliance you can shift to more direct statements of intent and such, saying
shes actually quite cute etc.
So while youre in a conversation it is actually a better situation to go more direct in. Dont cross your
fingers and talk about the weather, hoping itll end up well. When a conversation is going nowhere, break
that line of talk off and go direct (again). Tell her shes cute, or that theres both something very
attractive and off-putting about her, or something else like that.
Good conversation isnt linear and usually not so much about the specific subjects. That also means you
can break off what you both were talking about and skip to a different subject. This goes for what shes
talking about but definitely also for what youre talking about yourself. Say her attention is drifting in the
middle of the story, just break yourself off and talk about something else. Dont allow for an interaction
that isnt going in the right way.
2 types of compliance:
- Her just not saying no or just giving a weak no.
- Her actually participating. This is the better one (though theyre both great to have).
Key game component: Anything you do to avoid awkwardness, will make it awkward.
Todd gives the example of a book by a radio host on starting conversations with people and making it
interesting. On such a show, people who are normally pretty articulate may get nervous, clam up, dont
what to say etc. and its the radio hosts job to make something out of it for half an hour on the air. Key
idea in the book: Assume the burden of the conversation. Assume that, at least at the start, its on your
shoulders to make something happen and put something out there, since the other person probably
wont. Even if theyre capable of it anyway, you cant trust on that. You have to start the engine, and
when its going you can possibly let it run.
Metaphor: Old lawnmower. If it has trouble starting up, you dont take it personally. Sometimes youve
got to try a couple of times before it works, its just being a lawnmower. Same thing with a girl,
sometimes you have to start the conversation a couple of times before it really kicks in.

When being persistent, dont keep trying the same thing when something gets rejected. Vary your
approach while persisting.
Examples of different things you can vary with when the response is no good:
Hey I think youre cute
You know whats funny
I have to go in a sec but I need your opinion on something
You know what happened to me the other day
I fucking hate you
Thats the cutest look Ive ever seen
Do you know whats interesting about you
But dont: I think youre cute, I think you look nice, I think youre adorable etc. All the same.
You need to figure out the blueprint of this particular girl. Once you figure that out (what triggers her),
you can use that over and over and over again and youre inside her head. Dont overuse it though, its
rather something you can use to gain her attention again during a conversation or stuff like that. You
dont want to make it obvious that youre pushing her button. Ideally, you have 2 or 3 of these things
which you can then use more often.
Screening Blueprint
Find her blueprint and act on that blueprint. See what she responds to and use that to have a good
Example: A girl said No, Im actually average height for an American woman. What you can tell from
that sentence:
- Shes somewhat educated. For an American woman means she knows such facts.
- Shes probably from an educated background.
- You can guess she probably knows or studies some level of math, statistics, etc.
- She derives value from fitting in and other peoples perception of her.
- When shes with a group shes pretty high value, thats why she identifies with the group.
So shes someone who likes to fit in, is pretty educated, probably did well in school, probably is relatively
smart, probably went to a good school, but probably isnt like a genius, but works very hard, and
probably derives a lot of her validation from being perceived as smart.
With such knowledge, you can undermine and help and have a good interaction.
Todds response: If youre average in any way were probably not going to get along, I only deal with
exceptional people. With that, he undid her worldview in one sentence and he could control the
Thats a complicated example but you can also read her from easier reactions, such as her reaction to I
love you or I hate you.
Another example is a girl who responded very well to physicality, so it was possible to mostly interact
physically, escalate quickly and have sex within 11 minutes, in the club.
To screen for a blueprint, think of blueprints that are common and ask questions or do little tests that are
indicative of such blueprints.
Example: The girl who wants rules and structure. You can simply ask her if shes the type of person that
likes rules and structure, and likes to know where youre going in life, or if shes the type of person thats

rather free and prefers figuring it out along the way.

Blueprint is not a static thing, its fluid. For example, someones blueprint with a celebrity is different from
their blueprint with someone they know through school and who theyre friends first with (and with
whom they may consider a relationship down the road). The blueprint depends on the context, in which
someones basically playing a different role. So when you screen for a blueprint, youre also directing the
blueprint (if youre smart about it). When youre screening for availability, logistics etc. youre also
indicating to her what the right things are to say and do. Youre actually moving her availability in a
certain direction.
Example: Screen for pulling by asking How protective are your friends. That might be a bit too obvious,
so a version with a more positive suggestivity to it might be: Your friends, are they extremely uptight,
do they call the police if you walk 5 feet away from them, or are they cool people who know how to chill
and who realize that youre an adult? The second option sounds a lot better this way. It might still be
that she says her friends are very protective so youve figured that out, but youre encouraging the
proper answer and behavior.
A girls blueprint will especially change when shes attached to you or wants to please you. Her answers
and outlook will change based on what she thinks you want. So you want to screen, but you also want to
influence the blueprint at the same time
Another form of screening and influencing blueprint is by qualification. That means letting her jump
through your hoops, finding out if and why you like her (she has to prove herself), etc.
Tip: Think of around 5 non-physical things you like in girls in general. When you have a hook and some
investment, start finding out if shes those things to qualify her. Thats going to both screen for and
encourage her to be those things. (Explained more in the Emotional Connection part.)
If you want to actively screen for blueprint (opposed to just seeing what characteristics pop up), youll
have to figure out what blueprints there are. So focus on blueprints you like, blueprints you want to
encourage, and then proactively screen for those. Just like in a science experiment in which you start
with a hypothesis, something to test, after which you do the experiment to test it. You dont just
randomly look at nature. You can get ideas from that, but its not precise.
Ideally, sets hook without you having to think about it. When a girl starts chasing and committing without
you thinking about it, thats perfect. That can happen when youre in state and self-amused. However,
this is hard to control.
The hook happens in phases. What is needed for a hook is explained in the F.R.E.D. model.
1. Focus: You need to have her focus in order to hook. If you dont have her attention, you wont be able
to hook her.
2. Relevance: The interaction needs to be relevant for her. You wont hook her in a conversation that
means nothing to her. If youre talking in terms of nebulous, vague topics, you wont be able to hook her.
You must say things that make it meaningful to her.
3. Emotion: It shouldnt just be theoretically meaningful to her, there must be emotional involvement and
impact. She has to have a certain commitment to you, and there have to be some chemicals running
through her body.

4. Decision: An action has to be attached to the emotion.

Focus: When you open, you need to get her attention on you. If youve lost her attention, rather than
trying other things to hook, you should first get her attention back. Thats fundamental to everything you
do in game; You must have her attention. Example: Set with another guy, where she likes the other guy
way more (at least at the beginning) but Todd gets her attention and thereby has the upper hand.
Always make sure you have the attention. Dont tolerate her being all over the place and not having
attention for you.
However, dont be obsessive about it either. For example, if youre talking at a bar and she wants to talk
to her friend for a bit while ordering a drink, you can let her talk to the friend while ordering the drink
and trust that shell come back to you in a minute. You dont have to have her focus every single second,
but you do need to know: Where her focus is, how youre going to get it back and when youre going to
get it back. If you dont have her focus at a certain moment, youre not gaming her at that moment.
Relevance: You give a reaction to things that you either perceive as being of value or a threat to you.
You will pay attention to these things. Both these things have meaning to us and evoke emotions.
Example: In caveman days something like food had value to us, so we focused on that. A predator was a
threat, so that also got our focus. They both had meaning to us, theyre relevant to us. So you want to
become either value or threat.
Information about us is of relevance to us because its by its nature a threat or valuable to us. If we can
understand how the world perceives us, we can utilize that information to either have more success or
avoid failure.
A great example of how to be of value others: Have an insight about them. You know what I notice
about you thats so interesting? instantly makes you have value because they wants to know, even if
they dont like you/dont know you yet, the fact that its about them causes there to be value there. Value
can also be there for people because you are an expert or at least know something interesting on a
subject and they have an interest in that subject, Becoming the teacher-role: I can teach you
something about or how to do X. That can also be of value, but since you dont know the person youre
dealing with well, you might not be able to assess yet what is of value to them other than themselves.
How to be a threat: Dog!, Slut!, I hate you! etc. Youre a threat to their ego, their self-esteem, their
social perception. That also makes them more invested in the interaction.
Once you get their attention, do something thats either of value or a threat. What Todd often says
immediately after he gets the attention is a push-pull statement about them, like I like you but I hate
you, You know what, youre so cute and I hate that I feel that way about you, I hate that I love you,
Theres something about you that I like but theres something that Im not sure about, You make me
feel so good with you, but that makes me nervous, Your vibe is very interesting (since interesting

can be both positive or negative and its unclear unclear which one it is, that makes it of value or a
threat), You know what, youre so amazing, so cute, that I know that at some point I wont know what
to say to you. Thats going to be so fucking awkward so lets just end it now. Even when its all pure
positive, the wording is still like a push-pull so it still evokes those emotions. You say whatever you want
to say and whatevers in your head but you package it in this way. You can say pretty much anything
extremely positive, negative or in between. Example: Youre fucking hot vs. Youre pretty cute vs.
Youre kind of cute...ish vs. Oh, youre actually kind of cute (girl wonders: Wait, actually, what does
that mean?). You can also do this with negatives to positives, like saying Youre so much trouble/Youre
phenomenally evil! with a sly smile.

(Sentences like You know what are also good to quickly get attention before you mention the actual

threat/value statement.)
This relevance also adds a context and premise for the interaction.
Emotion: For relevance, you may give something interesting and relevant about life. But once you finish
that topic, your relevance ends because its tied to the topic and not to you. You need to make it
emotionally (rather than cognitively) relevant and tie it to yourself. Example: You have an interesting
look is relevant, You have an interesting look, I kind of love and I kind of hate it is tying it to you. Or
like You have an interesting look, I bet that has lead to you being perceived in this and that way, tying
it to emotions in other parts of their life or an emotional experience for them, rather than just a factual
conversation. You should trigger an emotional experience and it should be a part of being with you.
Emotions are chemicals and hormones flowing through the body. They motivate us to do things we
wouldnt be able to do without them. They are the reason we do things, they create priority and drive in
life. Youre not going to get a girl into you without compelling her emotionally.
However, the chemicals that make these emotions will eventually subside and she wont feel that way
anymore. Eventually you wont be stimulating her, the chemicals will flush out of her system, and she
wont feel that way anymore. So when you dont do something with those emotions, when you dont turn
them into something tangible outside the body, she will forget about you and flake when the emotions
subside. Or shell be having some fun with you, kissing etc. and then leave because shes not attached to
you. Thats where the next step comes in.
Decision: Get compliance when the great emotions are there, when theyre feeling all emotional, bubbly
and great. Once youre at that point, you say something like You dont have to talk to me, you can go
upon shell respond with something such as No Im good here, I want to stay because at that emotional
high point she really doesnt want to go. Thats the commitment. She turned the emotions in her body
into something real and tangible in the world. You created a situation in which she can show she wants
to be with you. When that commitment happens, you have a solid hook. Thats the key thing to getting a
girl to chase you. In the ideal (rare) situation, shell tell her friends at the end of the night: Look, I know
youre going to try and protect me, youre probably right, Im probably dumb, but I like this guy, Im
going with him, and I dont care. Deal with it. And then she walks off with you. Another (rarely
occurring) ideal that happened to Todd, is a girl staying in a country to be with him while her friends are
leaving, thats compliance.
Another form of compliance is passive compliance or non-non-compliance. They should object or reject
you for something you do, but they dont. Imagine saying to a girl Oh my god youre such a fucking slut,
I hate you and she doesnt leave, verbally object, get angry, slap you or whatever. She likes you too
much and shes afraid to do that, thats also compliance. Part of that type of compliance is that, in her
mind, she has to rationalize why she didnt.
You need either of these forms of compliance to hook her.
At an emotional high point, its an ideal situation to escalate because that will be received positively
(compliance). (Note: Its not actually a point in time, its a period of time.) This way you can escalate
without risking a lot of social capital. However, you can also use this to very well to push away, so she
can invest by trying to make it right again between the two of you, by showing effort to keep you there,
or at least by showing passive compliance like not leaving.
In every hook, these phases happen. Even if you hook pretty much instantly, they happen lightning fast.
Example: Hey, you, come here, you look her in the eyes and you grab her with a hand of god and pull
her in. Hey = Attention. You = Relevance (value/threat). Come here while looking in her eyes and

conveying your intensity = Emotion. Her grabbing your hand and you pulling her in = Decision
Other times for example, you may try this but she only somewhat reacts to Hey. In that case, youll
have to go through the F.R.E.D. process some more. Either way, that same process is in existence in all
Compared to using self-amusement to hook: Self-amusement is a cross your fingers way of hooking, its
indirect. But its effective, because it conveys value which ties into the point of Relevance. Also, people
often react Emotionally to high value. After that, you hope the rest happens organically while spending
time with the girl. However, if you self-amuse and you understand those phases at the same time, you
can make the full F.R.E.D. cycle happen much more consistently and quickly. On the opposite side, being
needy instead of self-amused conveys a threat and hardly to no value, which does not evoke the right
kind of emotion.
In a case where you find yourself chasing after a girl, to flip the script you should first realize at which
point of F.R.E.D. you are. If you are constantly chasing for Attention, youre very far away from achieving
what you want. If youre at Relevance or Emotion, you should focus on doing things that encourage a
Decision a.k.a. compliance. Example: She says youre amazing, but you brush it off like Nah Im nothing
special, itll wear off so she can fill that gap by repeating youre amazing or staying with you even
though youre not that amazing. Another example is sometimes telling a girl shes free to go, after which
staying is a form of compliance.
Emotional Connection
Emotional connection and physical connection should happen together. Emotional connection motivates
physical connection more than the other way around (and its safer in terms of not losing the set). You
shouldnt be finding out her intimate fantasies and secrets without having ever touched her, but usually
you also shouldnt be getting very physical and getting hot and heavy without knowing her at all. That is,
unless youre already in a situation where sex can happen, then you can go very physical. If you require
more trust, there needs to be more of an emotional connection along with the physical connection.
The first and most important stage by far is Qualification. Its basically about letting her know that theres
a legitimate reason you like her, as opposed to you just approaching her because shes the next girl.
Another great thing about it is that it builds its own value, because while youre finding out about a girl,
youre putting her through hoops and asking these difficult questions. This shows youre a selective guy
with options and thus high value, and she knows she has to work to be with you. Next to that it also
creates emotional arousal and the Relevance factor of the F.R.E.D. model.
In qualifying, you basically switch the buyer-seller dynamic. In that dynamic, one person is selling
something to the other person (in dating; themselves) and the other person is deciding. Doing both is
very hard, so you want to be on the buying side with the girl on the selling side.
Of course this is ironic, because you walked up and started the interaction. That feels and seems like
youre starting by selling yourself. However, that doesnt have to be like that. Analogy: You go to a store
to buy a TV. You dont have to start selling yourself to the TV, just because you walked up to it. Its not
like you have to explain that youd take good care of the TV, keep it clean, give it a nice place in the
living room, etc. Youre interested in the TV because it seems nice, but you can still be selective. You

need to know more before actually buying it, and there are a lot of other nice TVs out there, so you let
the salesperson try to convince you to buy the TV. Similarly with a girl you walk up to. You tell her you
like her, after which you ask who she is, what her features are (e.g. is she smart, can she be sexy, is
she exciting or boring).

In a conversation you can achieve this by intelligently dismissing questions about you, and turning it in a
conversation where she qualifies. Examples from infield:
- Make a joke of it: She asks where your friends are, you say I dont have any friends, Im shy.
- Hardly giving information: She asks Who are you?, you say Just a guy.
- Probably more, be creative.
Preferred attitude: The prince has chosen. Youre the prince, youve chosen her, a common girl, for an
audience in your court. If she fucks it up, shes out of the court. Youre providing a thousand times more
value in the interaction than her (not because of effort but because youre the prince), its not even a
contest. If you had a cheque for $10.000,- in your backpocket, you wouldnt feel nervous about asking a
few questions before giving it to her. You know youre offering value. As man, youre providing great
experiences, learning opportunities, influence, inspiration, sex, belonging, safety, boundaries, possibly
material resources, and more. Realize how much thats worth, way more than that $10.000,- cheque. You
shouldnt feel nervous about talking to the girl, you shouldnt feel the need to qualify for her. You should
feel like youre trying to find a girl whos worthy of that, because you have plenty of options.
Realize that qualification in itself is another form of escalation and social capital. Every time you demand
something from the girl and she says yes to it or goes along with it, you build social capital, youre
getting closer to her. And obviously youre also getting to know her.
Most things other than qualification either build value while damaging comfort or the other way around.
Examples: Being a badass, asshole, non-needy, very assertive, etc. build value but can damage comfort
(she trusts you less) because it seems like you have too many other options.
Getting to know a girl, telling her your innermost secrets, confessing vulnerability, etc. builds comfort but
can damage the value you have to her. Qualification demands things from her, but at the same you get
to know her, so you build both value and comfort.
How to qualify in practice: First, figure out what you want to qualify on. For example, finding those 5
non-physical traits you look for in a girl. Also, you could qualify for things she should have that lead to
the relationship you want. Think of things such as logistics, beliefs, attitudes and things like
adventurousness for same night (one night stand) qualifiers. For the long term, you could think of
qualifiers like education, financial independence, freedom and flexibility in her life, is she sexually open,
does she like to learn new things. (These are based on Todds preferences, yours could be completely
The idea is that you have a picture in your head of the perfect girl youre looking for in general, as well as
the perfect scenario, attitudes and structure to the story for a one-night-stand or a dating scenario.
Depending on your optimal scenario for those particular logistics and that particular girl, you can qualify
for that.
When youre qualifying for the one-night-stand but you figure out that it wont work out tonight for valid,
plausible reasons, its a situation for a phone number and follow up in that way. Then you can qualify for
things like how you can meet up on the date, what kind of person she is and whether youd enjoy
spending time with her. You qualify towards the end that you have in mind. Such an end could be sex,

date, relationship, threesome, etc.

Again, youre screening for it and youre also encouraging them to it. So you always present things in
such a way that what you want is the good option and what you dont want is the bad option. (Be sure to
be sufficiently subtle about this.)
Youll find that when you get better at game, girls will feel overwhelmed by you, youre overqualified.
Youll hear things from her like Youre such a player, you could get so many other girls, why are you
with me. She doesnt feel qualified (i.e. not entitled to you). In that situation shell be less likely to sleep
with you because she feels its not special and shell just be another notch on your belt, which detracts
from the experience for her and she could feel slutty. However, when you find a few things about her
that are special to you, even (or rather especially) when she still doesnt feel like she deserves you, that
makes a great experience for her.
Example: One girl basically convinced herself Todd was the most connected guy in Vegas and that they
were in very luxurious hotel, just so it would fit the narrative of him having high value, to add to the
experience for herself. He didnt do anything other than qualifying her, not qualifying himself and not
wanting to talk about work even though she was giving him compliments about it.
The experience a girl wants is that of the guy she doesnt feel she deserves but for some reason theres
something special in the interaction (chemistry, commonality) that makes it beautiful because shes not
just the next girl, its special.
The only other known communication method that builds both comfort and value at the same time is
storytelling. Youre leading the frame, youre dictating the interaction, you control whats going on. At the
same time, you give the girl a window into your life, she gets to know you.
Example: Is she fit? Feel her arm Oh youre strong, do you work out? Depending on where its at, you
can give positive or negative feedback, or graded feedback. So if a girl feels massively beneath you, you
can massively compliment her Oh you do that, thats amazing, I love that!. However, if shes seriously
hot and is used to dating all kinds of high value people, heavily complimenting her doesnt mean anything
to her. Then, you could say something like Oh ok, so you do yoga. Do you teach it or do you just go to
classes? or Do you do these crazy training camps in the mountains or just that local place here around
the corner? or Oh like that intense hot yoga? Not, oh well thats still pretty cool though, I
guess (Basically saying that even though she does yoga, theres still a higher level in that and doing

yoga isnt that special. Trying to uplift a very confident hot girl by giving her compliments is just try-hard
and doesnt add anything, instead of that you now keep her feat solidly on the ground. And if she does
do something really special, you have her qualifying so much to you that an Oh, you do that? Thats
actually pretty cool actually really means something to her.)
You can do something similar with disqualifiying where shes from and such, like: Where are you from?
Oh there? Oh Ok, well anyway *different subject*. After that, she wonders whats wrong with
where shes from and such. Or, when she needs a bit of positive feedback to have a good interaction you
could say Oh really, oh I love that city, I went there and.
It doesnt have to be in words, a lot of it can be done nonverbally like the look of oh thats amazing or
oh, well thats ok too I guess without even saying it.
By controlling how positive or negative your feedback is, you control the level of qualification. With a girl

that needs more value than comfort, youll be more harsh in your qualfication and with less positive
feedback. But if a girl already is basically in love with you and feels undeserving of you, you wont be so
harsh in qualifying her and you give a lot of positive feedback so she feels at the same level as you.
Reverse qualification: When they ask you questions, you can either be impressive if you need value, or
you can ground it into their reality if you need more comfort.
Example Todd: Has a lifestyle in which he travels a lot, meets a lot of people and does generally cool
things in life, which all sounds great to a girl. If a girl needs value, he tells her that. But if hed tell that to
an insecure girl, shed feel like hes way above her. In that scenario, he tells her about how he was
actually really shy in college and insecure about his career, and how he actually took a stupid risk and got
really lucky. That makes it more grounded, more relatable.
To girls with high standards, for whom whatever you do wont be that impressive, you can also not even
try to be impressive by saying things like: Yeah I dont like talking about work, people always seem to
define me based on that, I want you to like me for me. After that, we can talk about all that shit, but I
dont want our attraction and relationship to be built on superficial things, lets just keep it about us for
now. (With that statement youre also basically saying that who you are and who she is (so what your

personalities are like) is whats important, basically negating the importance of her achievements, status
or looks.)
The key thing that builds comfort is time. You cant properly define comfort, or feeling at ease, in a
positive, only in a negative. Comfort is lack of discomfort. Its like having sore muscles after going to the
gym, you feel that but you dont know what a non-sore muscle feels like. So comfort is also something
that should grow over time, in the sense that discomfort is fading away. Thats how trust grows, it grows
over a time period in which theres no reason not to trust someone. Thats why it often takes time before
you can sleep with a girl. You need to let things play out. If you try to let things happen too fast, its
going to take away your opportunity to build comfort and the effort you put into it is going to create
massive discomfort. That effort conveys youre the type of guy that hasnt been there before, for whom
this is a big deal, its a heavily invested thing.
In being patient however, dont be passive. Dont just piss away time. Escalate, be engaged in the
interaction. Being disengaged conveys you dont have chemistry, which builds discomfort. Also, when
things calm down after the initial phase, the emotions subside and that needs to be replaced with
Think of a graph, where the vertical axis is arousal and the horizontal axis is time. At the beginning of a
set youre putting a lot of energy into the set to keep things going and going in the right way. After a
while however, the energy goes down and its more of a calm, comfortable and aroused vibe. Thats the
vibe in which sex happens. However, while the energy goes down, the set gets less interesting and fun
so theres a risk of losing the girl. So you need to replace the energy that has subsided with something
else, which is physicality. So while the energy goes down, the amount of physicality should go up to keep
it constant. While you start energetic and low on physicality, it should become more low energy and very
physical (sensual, close to sex). After that, the transition to sex is natural. This is especially true when
theyre complying and going with you along the entire way, chasing you and participating.
There are two types of connection you can build:
- Wide rapport: The idea that you can talk about anything with someone.
- Deep rapport: There are a few topics about which you can have real deep conversations (as opposed to

superficial gossip).
Ideally you want both. If youre constantly talking about one topic deeply, when a girl comes out of that
conversation shell feel like she can only talk about that one thing with you. Shes not really feeling deeply
connected with you because that one subject was all you connected on. On the other hand, if you talk
about a bunch of things superficially, shell think youre fun for conversation but theres no depth to your
conversation and connection. She hasnt really gone into something so theres no real emotion being
aroused there. Shell be fine with seeing you again, but she wont be deeply motivated. So one is
motivating but not very comfortable, the other is comfortable but not very motivating. You want that
deep rapport and that motivation. Having both wide and deep rapport is going to improve upon the
experience of comfort.
As said, comfort is mainly a factor of time. Some sets take an hour or less, some take 7 hours. Part of the
reason is the girls blueprint, some girls simply need more time for comfort. However, the main reason is
what the nature of the time spent is. There are things you can do to make that time appear to go by
faster (as if more time has gone by than there actually has).
- One way is having both deep and wide rapport, which causes the time spent together to mean more so
it dilates that time.
- Another one is making use of multiple locations. Spending time with her in several places instead of one
place makes it seem as if youve been through more together, building comfort with her more rapidly.
Either way, the idea is to make it feel as if youve been together for a longer period of time, youve talked
about more things, introduced her to more of your friends, etc. Those things all tend to build comfort
Having more similarities in common with her also increases comfort. Its because having a commonality
makes you feel like you know certain things about that person. For example: Todd was a soccer player
and knew a lot of other soccer players. If he meets a girl that played soccer, it feels like he knows things
about her because he has experience with soccer players. It feels like he knows this by association. It
kind of feels like hes spent time with her because he associates with that group. Association with a
group, activity or other commonality makes comfort grow faster.
Topics that create connection: Passions, sexual experiences, intimate experiences, family and travel can
be good depending on the context. However, be sure to talk about such topics after the girls
committed (Decision from F.R.E.D.). Also, dont go too deep. As youre having such deep conversations,
still make fun of her now and then to keep it interesting. You dont turn down the value completely and
go comfort only.
For a girl to come home with you, the perfect phrase is basically: Were going somewhere lovely, that
you will love. And if you dont, well then you can always leave. It doesnt really matter either way
because Im having a good time, and thats all that really matters right.
- Were going somewhere lovely, that you will love: Were going somewhere positive.
- And if you dont, well then you can always leave: Meaning that its not a big commitment, not a
hassle, you can always get out of it. You dont sell how amazing it is, you sell that its not a big
commitment. Analogy: A lot of people will see a product that seems amazing, but they wont buy it
because it seems too amazing to be believable. But they will buy something when theres a money-back
guarantee. You dont have to sell yourself, because at that point that upside is already there, they
already like you. What you have to sell is the lack of downsides, that its not a big risk.

- It doesnt really matter either way because Im having a good time, and thats all that really matters
right.: Im not in this to get laid, though if it happens thats great. Nor am I in this to get something
from you or to use you. Im having a good time right now. Its all about the experience. It should be
about the experience for you because its about the experience for her. That makes it safe and relatable.
Physical connection
This is absolutely essential. Youre going to have touch her and pull your dick out at some point as they
say in RSD. You should constantly be pinging and moving forward with physical escalation. However, it
shouldnt be needy, obvious and aggressive. Thats where 2 steps forward, 1 step back comes into play
again. Push to the point of a little bit of discomfort, and then chill it out, back off for a bit, after which
you try again. Also, remember the part about making a move in a way that it doesnt force a hard no. If
she doesnt accept it, it should not be a big negative. So constantly, relentlessly push forward, but not in
a way that it can hurt the interaction.
So those are the phases of a successful pick-up: Open, Hook, Emotional Connection, Physical Connection,
Close. Remember, the Close is the objective. So everything you do in all the other phases should be
geared towards the close, not geared towards getting through that phase or getting to the next phase.
For example, if you do things to hook a girl that are going to make her distrust you to a degree that you
wont be able to build comfort later, youll make it very hard for yourself to get to the close. Managing to
get an emotional connection so that a girl feels close to you, while destroying your value in the process,
you wont get her to chase you and participating. Later in the interaction youll be pushing and shell be
resisting (Girl: I dont see you in that way) . You can do all these things that may get you ahead and
towards the close, but theyll actually hurt the close itself. Try to avoid that while moving forward. Always
keep the Close in mind. All the other steps along the way are nice, and it can be great to get through
them while learning. But in the end its not about finishing the checklist, youll want to go for a successful