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StoryTelling - A Lifetime of Creation

By Chiara Marrapodi

As I look around me I see the life I have created. I scan my physical space, I
created the vision of what I believed to be capable of and here it is. This vision I
created as a story in my mind. It started with the resources I needed, how I was
going to get there and then what the final result would look like. I created it from
beginning to end. I was indeed the great Master of my own piece of art - I call it
my life! With each day that goes by I am painting my personal canvas. Littered
with experiences; there are people, animals, inanimate objects and me. Over
time my master piece developed. I painted the base a color that represented me
and my place in the world when I first arrived. Then I covered it with other
colors based on the experiences of my childhood and my perception of these as I
learned to navigate in a physical body. In my young adult years, I continued to fill
the canvas with experiences that reflected those I gathered in childhood. Adding
glitter here, metallic there and solidifying and embedding some of those sketches
that I started and didnt finish through lack of experience. So not only am I
painting a canvas that has been developed over time through my experiences
and my perceptions I am also expressing my creativity by erasing, blotting and
creating anew. My canvas has depth, I can move deep within it and see the past,
envision the future and paint the present if I want to. This canvas also resides in
my body. My body is the medium for my thought and I can express it using my
voice, my limbs and my full body movement. As I learnt to use this instrument
for my expression I realize that inherently, what I feel is happening now has
already happened. You see there is a lag time between what my mind creates and
its expression through my body. So in essence its already created, it has already
happened. As I place quill to paper and write these words I am leafing through
the many master pieces I have created. I see they are placed in an elaborate
MindBook. As I leaf through the gilded pages I see the different master pieces I

have created during the changing chapters of my life. Some are fully complete
others have a few missing parts. I dont have to be a master painter or drawer, I
am a master imaginer. I imagine each leaf of my book and know that I can
replace the master pieces created if I want to at any time. Its up to me its not all
cast in stone. Because the canvas of my mind is malleable, its influenced by
those around me and my perception of them and myself. My book is scripted
based on my belief system. My ideas are limited to what I have perceived and
when some one shows me a different perspective then I learn, erase, blot and
create anew. As I place quill to paper and write these words I am creating! As I
place my quill to paper, these words have already been written and they are
already being read by you! Each master piece I make I place carefully in my book
of life, for each is my memory. The memory deeply embedded in my cellular
structure that is the vellum that holds my experience. So as I review my
experience I see that some are not easy, there is unkindness, trauma and many
experiences that contrast the deeply satisfying and heart felt ones. As I look at
the balance of experiences I see there are contrasts. Just as there is contrasts of
colors and light there are contrasts in my master piece. Where there is a
glitterati of joy, there are others that show deep sorrow. I realize that for there to
be balance and for me to know how to use my instrument (they body) to express
myself I am learning through all these experiences. Learning that when I open
my lips to speak words with my voice I am able to create joy, pain or hurt in
myself. I realize I can create joy, pain or hurt in other beings. If I move my limbs
I can do the same. If I choose to, I can repeat these experiences with many
different people and only when I look at the whole set of master pieces do I see
the patterns that emerge. Only then can I understand what I am creating. As I
look deep into my master pieces, I go back in time and see that for me to know
emotion and understand that I create in anothers space, I interact. Interaction
means receiving as well as giving. I realize that my master pieces are not static
they show motion and for me to understand how to express myself using my
instrument I am continuously receiving feedback. Without this I cannot know
what my expressions are like. This creates a sense of understanding and I realize

I begin to balance my use of the instrument. I refine it. As I do so and leaf


through my book I see that the images, words and experiences are becoming
more refined. My awareness is creating experiences that are more subtle than
those I started with. As I place quill to paper, my vocabulary is changing, my
potential to feel and understand the subtleties of the world around me, my
instrument and my perceptions is refining. The grand Master Piece is refining
within itself. I realize that no one out there is responsible for me or my grand
master piece. I notice that the only times they are is when I allow them to take
the quill and write for me. But they are not me and these are the darkest times in
my grand master piece. The darkest. You see I became a victim for just a minute,
an hour, a day, a week, a year and sometimes part of my life time. I gave my
power away and thought I couldnt create - I forgot who I was. I didnt want to
take responsibility for my grand master piece. It meant I was to be present, I was
to be accountable, I was to be vulnerable and see who I was becoming through my
belief system. I wanted to escape, so I gave my quill away. As I leafed through my
MindBook - the images and creations were dull during these times. You see the
word vic-tim comes from Latin and it means killing a creature as a sacrifice for
the Gods. As I leafed through the gilded pages of my MindBook I saw that the
grand master piece showed my sacrifice. The sacrifice of my Soul, my Essence,
my Being at those times when I gave my power away. I realized only I had the
potential to change my grand master piece to begin to erase, blot and create
anew. Some of the experiences I couldnt totally erase but I could use them as a
stepping stone to re-invent, re-create and re-build. You see being a vic-tim was
my choice. Being a vic-tim was not the fault of another, they were reflecting to
me who I believed I was, what I believed I was capable of and what I believed I
could create. So I decided to take my quill back. It is mine and only I want to
create my MindBook, only I. As I place quill to paper, you are a part of my
creation, come and share your MindBook, come and share you Master Pieces,
because in sharing we grow, evolve and transcend.
Chiara Marrapodi. All Rights Reserved.