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1) Do Your Homework
a. Success in Negotiation is strongly correlated with the Time spent
b. Preparing in Groups help, others will come up with things you didnt.
c. Its very valuable to have things you dont want in a negotiation so
you can give them away for things you do.
d. Always have the mindset Should this deal be made? FIRST.
e. If they present you with a benchmark number, THINK. Where did the
number come from? If you do not know, it would be good to Let me
look at this and call you back. But you should have already done
your homework so
f. In salary, monetary negotiations use third-party information to
verify what others in the comparable field are charging / making.
2) Speak In A Nice Voice > Voice must project calm and warmth
a. Focus on influencing them, not being passive and waiting for them
to respond.
b. Act with a purpose and not react, falling for it hook line and sinker.
c. Find out more.
3) Start With Im Sorry > Gets you their attention + they are curious and
surprised. The reason being Customer Service are used to be attacked,
this gets them to lower their guard and makes them feel good. Therefore,
they will be more inclined to help you get what you want. When you are
deferential, the other side has a tendency to drop their guard because
they feel powerful because youve empowered them.
4) Use This may sound harsh > It makes them prepare for the worst, but
when you actually say it whatever comes next is always less than what
they expect. It makes people feel relieved and seem easy in comparison.
5) Turn a complain call into an appreciation call. ? By using the method of
forced empathy. You have to avoid the predictable. Do not let them
follow the script.
6) A Focused Comparison With An Open-Ended Question > You do not
demand anything, but if you make a solid comparison then the conclusion
in your head will appear in their head and since they thought of it
themselves, they will be more likely to accept it. EG? Loyal customers
who pay their bills on time everyone have to pay higher prices than
strangers on the street. If there is silence from the other party , eg. An
Effective Pause, you are good to go.
7) Sometimes, People do not know what their problem is; you need to figure
it out and solve it for them.
8) Attach a fairness argument to whatever you propose.
9) Always have a backup plan or alternative.
Paint a picture of how bad it will be for both parties if the
negotiations do not work out.
If someone says Take it or Leave it, do NOT respond. If they are
still there after a minute, you know it was not legit.

The most dangerous negotiation is the one that you dont know youre in

Difficult Conversations
1) Keep Calm.
2) Treat them like a child.
3) Please speak more slowly > Slow down the situation, gives both parties
a chance to be calm and not just react.
4) What would you like me to do? > This makes them think and forces
them to formulate and answer.
5) Dont make statements but instead ask Questions > If you explain then
the other party will interpret it as a veiled form of fighting back.
6) Id like
7) Let them have the last word.
Hostage Negotiation
1) Active Listening > Listen to their side and make them aware youre
a. Listen. Do not interrupt, disagree or evaluate
b. Nod your head and make brief acknowledging comments.
c. Without being awkward, repeat back the gist of what they just said.
d. Inquire. Ask questions to show you have been paying attention.
e. Ask Open ended questions. Eg. Sounds like a tough deal Tell me
how it happened
f. The idea is to listen to what the other party is saying and feed it
back to them. > You discover what is important to them and you are
trying to help them hear what they are saying to find out if what
they are saying makes sense to them.
g. Use emotional labeling eg. You sound pretty hurt about being left.
It doesnt seem fair VS a poor response eg. You dont need to feel
that way. If he was messing around on you, he was not worth the
energy. It is judgmental.
2) Empathy > you get an understanding of where theyre coming from and
how they feel.
3) Rapport > Empathy is what you feel. Rapport is when they feel it back.
They start to trust you.
4) Influence > Now that they trust you, youve earned the right to work on
problem solving with them and recommend a course of action.
5) Behavioral Change > they act.

Sourced and Summarized from around the web for my reference