You are on page 1of 20

“USER INTERFACE”

INT. HALLWAY – DAY


CONOR
I’m doing this documentary to tell the
story of a man trying to marry his
videogame. I’m sure the media is going
to spin this in whatever way they wish,
but I want my take of it to get out
first. I’m hoping it’ll be the most
accurate one.
INT. CLASSROOM – DAY
The camera shows various clips of Chris teaching, helping
out students, walking around the classroom, and sitting at
his desk.
CHRIS (V.O.)
Hello. My name is Chris Shanks. I’m
twenty-four years old and I teach
engineering at Saratoga Springs High
School. I’m currently engaged to a
wonderful girl, and some people are
making a commotion about it.
Camera now shows Chris sitting in his chair.
CHRIS
I think that my life is pretty normal.
I got good grades in school, went to a
decent college, and here I am. I like
my friends and I like my relationship.
My fiancée’s name is Moriko. She’s –
she’s the love of my life. She’s just
the best.
EXT. BEST BUY PARKING LOT – DAY
Chris steps out of a car and camera scans the Best Buy
sign. He leans against the car.
CHRIS
This is where we first met. I remember
being so anxious that I started playing
the game right away, here in the car.
There were some other girls before her –
Screen shows various images of anime-style girls.

But she caught my eye right away. We


just clicked. She knew exactly what to

2
say and how to say it. I just fell for
her.
EXT. CAR – DAY
Chris is sitting in a car in his driveway.
CHRIS
We lead a very average life. When I
come home for work, she’s there to ask
me how my day was, to ask me if I like
her hair, and to see if I remember what
her blood type is. Just regular
conversation.
He walks up to the front door and goes inside.
INT. KITCHEN – DAY
Chris is stirring something inside of a pot on the stove. A
turned-on DS is sitting on the counter top.
CHRIS
Well, there she is. Moriko, lovely as
always.
MORIKO (V.O.)
Hello! How are you?
CHRIS
Just fine, thanks.
MORIKO (V.O.)
How are you?
CHRIS
Very good, Moriko. Thank you for asking.

Chris smiles at the camera and continues to cook.


INT. CHRIS’ LIVING ROOM – DAY
Chris is watching tv while the DS sits next to him on the
couch.
CHRIS
We enjoy regular things too, like tv. I
don’t know how people can make such a
fuss over our relationship when we do
the same exact things as every other
couple does.

3
Anyway, I’m very excited for the
wedding. We’re not inviting so many
people so it’ll be nice and close.
We’ll have it in my backyard, and I’m
sure the rest will fall into place.
I’ve got to contact a few wedding
planners. Then we just have to find a
priest to marry us. It’s a lot, but I
think if anyone can do it, it’s us.
He smiles at the camera once more.

The camera now goes through a montage of Chris’s daily


life. It shows him eating at a dinner table with the DS
across from him, with both of them in conversation. Then it
shows him in the bathroom brushing his teeth, Moriko on the
counter next to him. Music might be playing? I suppose we
could discuss that. Various other clips at our decision.
The final scene is of Chris laying the DS on the pillow
beside him in bed, and then plugging it in, laying down
himself, and shutting the light off.

INT. EVY’S HOUSE – DAY


EVY
I just worry for my brother sometimes.
Chris is the kind of guy to hold drugs
for someone just because they ask him
to. He gets in over his head.

I don’t really know his fiancée much.


I’ve met her, but she’s just quiet.
Chris tells me that she really only
opens up to him, but I don’t know. I’m
the only one he’s got to protect him,
you know?

I suppose I’ve got to trust him. I just


don’t want to see him hurt.

INT. BASEMENT – DAY


CHRIS’ FRIEND 1
Chris? I’m happy for him, man. He’s
always been the kind of ideal for the
gang.

4
CHRIS’ FRIEND 2
Yeah, we knew he’d be the first to get
married. Or get a girl.
CHRIS’ FRIEND 1
I don’t know Moriko that well –
CHRIS’ FRIEND 3
You don’t? Man, you should meet her.
She’s hot.
CHRIS’ FRIEND 2
Well what outfit was she in? That
winter outfit? Because that totally
doesn’t –
CHRIS’ FRIEND 1
Guys, this isn’t really what they’re
asking about.
CHRIS’ FRIEND 3
Right, my bad. But yeah, Chris is
awesome.

INT. GYMASIUM – DAY


Children are running in the background.
JEFF
Chris has always been like that. A
loser. When his parents died I took
both kids in – I’m his godfather, after
all. That sister of his is something,
but Chris is a whole other story. He’s
just some passive kid who -
(as kid trips and falls)

JOKES? I COULDN’T THINK OF ANYTHING


PARTICULARLY CLEVER.

INT. BECKY’S OFFICE – DAY


Becky and Chris are across the table from one another. They
shake hands and sit down.
BECKY
Hello, I’m Becky. When we spoke on the

5
phone I was surprised; it’s not often
that the groom is the one to call a
wedding planner. It’s refreshing to see
a man excited about his big day.
CHRIS
Thanks for making time to see me. This
has been kind of a rush and I knew I
wouldn’t be able to handle all these
calls and orders by myself, so I
thought to turn to a professional.
BECKY
Good thinking. Well, let’s not waste
time. I suppose we ought to start with
the guest list to get an idea of how
many we’ll be accommodating. Do you
have your fiancée’s list, or know how
many she’s thinking of?
CHRIS
Oh, well I’ve got her right here, we
could just ask her.
BECKY
...here?
Chris reaches into his bag as Becky looks on, puzzled.
INTERVIEW
BECKY
I met his fiancée. She seems... nice.
Not demanding, like most brides I meet.
BECKY’S OFFICE – AFTER CONVERSATION
BECKY
Have you thought about food? Chicken,
fish, any preferences?
CHRIS
Oh, I don’t mind myself. You know,
whatever most people like, I suppose.
The usual wedding fare.
BECKY
Perfect. I can set up the catering
myself then. Now, do you have any
allergies?
(awkwardly gesturing to the DS)

6
Does... she have... any... uhm.
CHRIS
Moriko? No, she doesn’t eat...
BECKY
(trying to disguise her misstep)
Oh, ah, no allergies then? Perfect,
perfect, I will get the caterer myself.
They both smile at each other for a moment.
BECKY
The only thing left to do is get the
dress.
CHRIS
Well she’s got a dress in game. It’s
not really classic white wedding, but
it’s suitable.
BECKY
We could fix up the DS, maybe? They
have accessories for them.
CHRIS
I’m not sure this occasion has much of
the precedent to have DS cases and
accessories to match...
BECKY
Well, I could probably make you one.
I’m not some fashion designer but I do
know how to sew, you know, if you
think...
CHRIS
Really? Wow, thanks, that would be
perfect.
They both pause.
BECKY
I think we’re all done. You know, this
wedding was fairly simple to plan,
considering how unconventional it is.
Becky quickly looks worried, wondering if she’s said
something wrong.
CHRIS
I still can’t thank you enough. Three

7
wedding planners before you just
laughed at me.
BECKY
Oh, no worries, you’re just like any
other client.
Slight foot in mouth moment.
CHRIS
I suppose I’ll see you soon, to
straighten everything out?
BECKY
I’ll keep in contact about the plans.
She stops for a split second, then extends her hand. He
shakes it.
INTERVIEW
BECKY
I think the wedding is going to go
well. As long as my contacts pull
through, it’ll go off without a hitch.

What do I think of her? Oh, Moriko is


just lovely. They’re a perfect match
for one another, really. Another happy
couple.
INT. CHRIS’ HOME – DAY
Chris is on the phone, pacing around his living room.
CHRIS
Really? Oh wow. I can’t believe this!
Thank you so much, really. It means the
world to me.
INTERVIEW
CHRIS
I was just contacted by the game
designers themselves! It seems like
they’re interested in the wedding – I
can’t believe that they personally
called me.
INT. HOME OFFICE OF GAME DEVELOPERS – DAY
DREW
Charlie and I worked on the game for

8
quite a few years. I guess we got
pretty attached to it. When we got word
of the wedding we were thrilled that
someone is that into our creation that
they want to marry her.
CHARLIE
I always had a feeling that Moriko
would be the one to get married first.
She’s just so pleasant and calm.
DREW
I suppose we’ll be acted as the fathers
of Moriko at the wedding. She’ll need
someone to give her away.
CHARLIE
Also we decided that we wouldn’t mind
helping pay for things. Practically
speaking, we’re getting lots of
advertisement for this whole event, and
we’ve already made a killing on the
game as it is. Who knew there were so
many lonely men in the North American
markets?
DREW
Usually we’d have to go to Japan for
that kind of treatment.
CHARLIE
Anyway, I think it’s just a nice
gesture. Plus, aren’t the bride’s
parents supposed to pay for the wedding
anyway?
Charlie smiles/laughs in a joking matter, while Drew smiles
contently, fully appreciating being called one of two
parents.
DREW
We’re really looking forward to the
event. When we spoke with Chris on the
phone he seemed like such a nice guy,
and that’s really what we want for one
of our girls. Someone to treat them
right, someone to respond to them. The
wedding should be a reflection of their
commitment.

9
CHARLIE
Yeah, I really am proud of how the
situation is working out. It’s a
picture perfect ending to our game.
They both smile and nod, and Drew puts his arm around
Charlie’s shoulder in approval. Charlie slightly glances up
at the hand on his shoulder and nervously smiles to the
camera.

INT. CHRIS’ LIVING ROOM – DAY


CHRIS
I think that the planning is going
well. We’ve got food down, the guest
list, and a bunch of other stuff. We’ve
got a lot left though, and I think I
want to –
Commotion is heard outside, including shouting and
chanting.
CHRIS
What the – what is that?
The camera pans to the window, which shows a bunch of
people out on his front lawn, some carrying anti-video game
marriage signs, others with fairly pointless Biblical
phrases.
CHRIS
Who the hell is that?
Chris walks to his front door and opens it, to which the
group outside shouts even louder.
EXT. CHRIS’ FRONT LAWN – DAY
The group comes closer to the front door, yelling and
shouting. A man, Isaac Keith, pushes to the front, holding
a megaphone.
KEITH
You, scorn of the earth, will pay in
the Lord’s fury for your vile actions!!
As he screams, Chris turns to the camera with a look of
both concern and skepticism.
INTERVIEW

10
KEITH
Hello. My name is Isaac Keith, and I am
the leader of the local association of
(group name). We’re a group helping
local families find Jesus, occasionally
by means of force.
He smiles.
KEITH
It just brings me closer to God to know
that I’m helping bring salvation to
these godless, heretic souls. In this
case, it’s a man trying to marry his
video game.
EXT. FRONT LAWN – DAY
CHRIS
I’m just trying to get married! What’s
so wrong about that?
KEITH
What’s wrong?! Have you even met
Jesus?! This is all against the Bible.
Do you know that you are corrupting the
minds of our good children with this
filthy, sinful action?! How could a
video game possible be baptized?
Keith turns to the crowd and recites a rather irrelevant
Biblical passage to which the crowd applauses. Chris turns
to the camera with another puzzled look.
KEITH
People put me out to be some kind of
villain, but I’m just trying to help.
God knows what’s best, and if he
intended for a man to marry a video
game, he would have invented it
himself. And he would have given it a
uterus. So it could birth more
Christians. This gosh-flibberty
technology is against our views as God-
fearing men. Me and my group are
looking out to save this country from
eternal damnation, one social
restriction at a time.
He smiles sincerely at the camera.

11
INT. EVY’S HOME – DAY
EVY
Chris has never been the fighting type.
All these people are so upset with him
over this ordeal. I don’t know why it’s
so bad for a couple in love to get
married, you know? Next thing you know
they’re going to tell Moriko that she
can’t vote.
INT. CHRIS’ LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
Chris is on the phone.
CHRIS
Becky? Yeah, hey! So how is the
planning going?
BECKY (V.O.)
Oh, perfect. There’s just one glitch
we’ve got.
CHRIS
A glitch? Oh no.
BECKY
Well it’s just that you requested a
Catholic priest, and well, it’s looking
pretty impossible. No one in the area
was interested. I found one in
Greenland willing to do it, but I’m not
sure if that’s legal or not.
CHRIS
(sighing) What are our options?
BECKY
Well, I got in contact with even more
religious leaders… and still got
rejected. There’s one minister in town
who was very interested, but I’m not so
positive if…
CHRIS
Really? Set it up!
BECKY
…alright, if you’re sure. I don’t know
if this is exactly what you’re looking
for, but I’ll set up an interview.

12
NEED HELP WRITING STEVE SCENE

INT. CAFÉ - DAY


Chris and Becky are sitting at a table, which has the DS on
it.
BECKY
Alright. Just sign right here and I’ll
be able to secure the band.
CHRIS
(as he signs) I can’t believe that this
is the last thing to do.
BECKY
Excited for Sunday?
CHRIS
I guess excited it what you’d call it.
First I deal with planning stress, and
now that that’s over, nervousness is
setting in.
BECKY
(she pats his hand) Oh, it’ll be fine.
Chris looks briefly down at his hand, not moving it.
Someone walks over and takes the chair under the DS, to
which Chris stops them, taking his hand away.
CHRIS
Oh, sorry, that one’s begin used.

In all the stages of final planning, I


forgot that you had said that you had
some news.
BECKY
Hm? (flattered that he’s interested in
her life) Oh, uh, yeah, I won this trip
sponsored by my company. I’m so excited
but they wouldn’t tell me when it would
– uh.
Becky turns to look outside, where she sees protestors. The
camera catches them through the window. Chris turns around.

13
CHRIS
Oh no.
The two of them walk outside and immediately spot Keith
several yards away, protesting with different signs for
many conservative initiatives.
KEITH
Guys, it’s them! Quick!
The crowd flips their signs, now adorned with phrases
against video game-human marriage.
KEITH
(to the general public, while trying to
provoke Chris) If Jesus had video
games, what would he call them? Sin-
boxes! This marriage is directly
against the Bible.
CHRIS
(walking up to Keith) What’s your
problem? Can’t you stick to your own
business?
KEITH
The word of God is my business! If we
let your marriage to that thing, then
what else will we marry next? A child?
A book? You will burn in hell for what
you’re doing, and this entire nation
will come down with it.
CHRIS
You’re just trying to do this for your
own selfish, close-minded
At this point, Hannah walks out of her office, nearby.
CONOR
(to the camera) that’s the mayor! Let’s
get her word.
The camera rushes up to Hannah’s face and the protestors
get louder, all addressing the politician.
CONOR’S VOICE
Mrs. LALA, what are your thoughts on
the issue?
HANNAH
What? What is this? Get that camera out

14
of my face! (as the protestors get
louder) Hey, I never said that I would
– excuse me? Get that camera out of my
face! (the camera turns off as soon as
she shoves her hand over the lens).

INT. ROOM – INTERVIEW


HANNAH
Sorry about that. You know, cameras
whirling around me shouting, it all
gets very hectic.

Anyway, I heard that there was an issue


at hand? Well, I am a firm believer
that… that issue… is a very important
one, that’s for sure. An interesting
topic. And I fully support that I will
bring this issue into a forum of
dedicated individuals and we will solve
the problem once and for all.
She smiles, happily thinking she’s gotten out of saying
anything remotely definitive. A camera man (or Conor)
quietly tells her that it’s a man trying to marry a video
game.
HANNAH (TO PERSON, NOT CAMERA)
…a video game? I don’t think I heard
you correctly? (she gets confirmation)

You dragged me out of work for this?


Some guy wants to marry his video game
and you make chaos? I have important
things to deal with! We’ve got a budget
no one can decide on and energy
problems, and you bring up a video
game? I can’t believe that you’d do
something so --
HANNAH (TO CAMERA)
You do realize that it’s just a video
game, right? It’s a piece of plastic
and you can’t really –
The camera cuts her off.
EXT. PARK – DAY
Chris is walking in the park, speaking to the camera.

15
CHRIS
When I met Moriko, I instantly knew.
It’s as if all I could think about was
her –
He loses focus, and the camera turns to see Becky, who had
been jogging in the park.
BECKY
Chris! Wow, small world. Or park,
anyway.
She giggles pleasantly, and Chris kind of flusters and
smiles as well.
CHRIS
Uh, yeah! Weird to bump into you here.
It’s evident that Chris isn’t able to pay attention, while
Becky is confident.
BECKY
So everything’s set for the wedding,
you’ve just got a few more checks to
sign. Nothing left to worry about.
CHRIS
Oh, I’ll get that to you as soon as
possible.
BECKY
(smiling) Right, then. I should leave
you to your interview (she eyes the
camera). See you later.
She jogs off and waves back. The camera turns back to
Chris, who is still looking at her.
CHRIS
I’m sorry, what was the question?
INT. ROOM – DAY
CONOR
So we decided that before the wedding
we’d get the people’s opinion. We went
around town and asked people if they
had heard of the story, and then their
thoughts about it.
EXT. OUTSIDE GROCERY STORE – DAY

16
MIDDLE-AGED WOMAN
What? People marrying video games?
That’s shameful. Can video games give
consent? I’m not convinced. I think you
should get the game’s opinion.
INT. POST OFFICE – DAY
BUSINESS MAN
I think it’s good. You know, we have to
be progressive these days. If we don’t
let video games through, who else are
we preventing from marriage? Dogs?
Children? Come on, let’s be sensible.
INT. CLASSROOM – DAY
FEMALE STUDENT
Well I think it’s terribly romantic.
They fell in love! Of course you should
let them marry.
MALE STUDENT 1
I don’t know. It just seems to me that
her personality is geared towards
wanting marriage. What if she wants
something different than the shackles
she’s granted?
MALE STUDENT 2
(gesturing with ipod and earphone jack)
How are they going... to... (cut off by
camera).
EXT. PARK – DAY
BOY
Is it fair to really mess with anyone
else’s life? I don’t think it’s much of
our place.
OTHER BOY
It’s fine by me, just as long as I
don’t have to look at it. Keep it to
yourself.
INT. LIBERARY – DAY
OLD MAN
To hell if I know. I can’t even figure
out how to ask my remote on a date,
much less marry the thing. You kids

17
with your technology.

INT. CHRIS’ ROOM – NIGHT


Chris is sitting at a desk with a computer on, showing an
email.
CHRIS
It’s the day before the wedding. I was
just checking some internet things when
I went to my email and found this:
He points to the computer screen, which reads an email from
a “heavens_guarddog[at]yahoo.com”:
Bewarned!! Jesus has been alerted to
your deeds and has sent an angel after
you in this time of crisis. For your
sins you shall be punished and it will
be a doom! The great Lord above us has
formed an army of his followers to make
the way...
The email continues with various fundamentalist phrases and
opinions, and Chris points at parts and reads aloud. The
email is concluded with the username’s personal signature,
which contains an amusing graphic (perhaps something with
flowers or the American flag on fire with “Praise
Jesus!!!!” written above it.
CHRIS
I guess they put a lot of thought in
it. It’s signed anonymous.
(sarcastically) I’m not entirely sure
who could have written it.

Am I threatened? No, not really. I


suppose the most these people can
usually do is throw holy water at me.
Though water would probably be damaging
to Moriko.. so, I guess that would
work. (pauses) Fundamentalism prevails,
for once.

The rest of the day has been calm.


Moriko and I have both been a bit off,
but that’s alright; tomorrow is our
wedding day. It’s normal to be nervous.

18
WEDDING SCENE

So I know what’s supposed to happen during the wedding scene, but I felt that it was so important and long (about five
pages, I’m predicting) that I didn’t think it would be right for me to attempt to write it on my own. Plus, the Steve character
still confuses me so I can’t write him well on my own. Here’s the synopsis:

Guests arrive, some interviews happen.


It’s evident that Becky isn’t at the weddig.
The commencement begins, with Steve being a sleazebag, etc.
Isaac interrupts, grabbing the game.
Charlie punches him in the face, takes the game back.
Commencement continues, Chris kisses the touch screen.
Some of the reception is seen, some funny clips, some drunk people, etc.
Various closing interviews. Lights out, two weeks later.

INT. CHRIS’ DINING ROOM – DAY


There is a wrapped gift sitting on the table, with a note
from Becky reading “Sorry I couldn’t make it! Thought you
could use this.” Chris looks at the note and smiles.
INTERVIEW
CHRIS
We’ve been back for about a day now.
The honeymoon was nice, we went to
Florida and enjoyed ourselves.
He seems content, but not thrilled.
DINING ROOM
CHRIS
You know, I should thank her for the
gift. It was really very nice her. I
think I’ll call her now.
Chris walks to the phone, which is sitting on a counter
behind Moriko. He gives her a short glance as he passes the
DS, takes the phones, and walks back. He dials and brings
the phone to his ear.
BECKY (V.O.)
Hello?
CHRIS
Hey Becky, it’s Chris. I wanted to
thank you for the gift.

19
BECKY (V.O.)
Oh, I’m glad you liked it! Listen, I’m
so sorry I couldn’t make it, but that
trip I won kind of overlapped with the
wedding. Best wishes, though.
CHRIS
(smiling) Oh, no problem! Hey, do you
want to meet up sometime? I should
formally thank you. Maybe we could
catch dinner or something.
BECKY (V.O.)
…oh, uh, yeah! That sounds… that sounds
nice. I’ll see you then.
Chris smiles and hangs up. He looks to Moriko and then to
the camera.

20