Chapter 1: Chapter 1: Popsicles Anyone? A/n: OK so yeah...

here's a story I thought of a while eating popsicles its going to be a series of events about what happens when Bella left alone with Emmett a nd jasper and stuff like that. REVIEWS MAKE ME HAPPY Bella's pov: Edward and the other left me with jasper and Emmett to hunt. I was lounging on the sofa,watching a documentary about the great war,which I was hone stly bored to death Jasper was on the sofa a few feet away engrossed with the te levision. He still struggled with his thirst. I felt deep sympathy for him,but i was glad that won't a problem much longer. Emmett disappeared in the kitchen a while ago. The kitchen?I don't know why either. I looked over to Jasper and he w as shaking his head in disgust and the TV. Suddenly the aroma of rust filled my nose.I immediately felt light headed and nauseous. I was wondering where it coul d it be coming from and I hoped to god it was not me .I looked over at Jasper an d he didn't look ravenous but he looked as confused as I was. Jasper's pov: I wa s staring and the TV noting everything they had wrong ,Bella was a few feet away . My struggle was not as hard because I didn't inhale. Emmett had disappeared a while ago. I had no idea why ,but with Emmett you didn't want to . I saw Bella s tiffen and angst was radiating off of her. I turned to her questionably and she whispered "Do you smell that" I gave her a look. She knew I barely inhaled for h ere own safety. Before she clarified Emmett came skipping out beaming. He was ca rrying a tray of Popsicles. "Emmett what's that" Iasked . Then I smelt it .Blood . But wasn't human but from animals but were was it coming from? "for who?" I as ked

"Us" He said in a duh tone . I wanted to smack him in his dumb head. "when-no wh y did you make those?"i asked "I smelt a cat in the garaged..." he said slowly.I really wanted to smack him in his dumb head I looked over to Bella and she real ly looked green,as she stared at them. He popped in his mouth and sucked on it l ike a three year old. He turned to Bella a started waVing one in her face slowly . "Want one" he asked Bella shot upstairs to the bathroom and can her retching i n the bathroom.I really really wanted to smack him in his dumb head He skipped t o the staircase and called out "I thought you might want to practice for being a vampire...or being with with Edward..." I heard Bella choke from upstairs. I sm acked him in his dumb head. "What was that for?" for being an ASS"for being rude to Bella you know how Edward gets" "yeah yeah him and and his stuck up self. Yo u know if he removed some tension he wouldn't SO stiff !!" he yelled but cracked up at the end. I smacked him again. ...and again and again...i just kept smacki ng him until Bella came down stairs. She plopped on the the couch,blushing,she o bviously heard Emmett's comment. i felt a lot of embarrassment and a little lust coming off of her. Emmett began sucking the Popsicle again and sat close to Bel la. "so-suck-what's-suck-up-suck-Bel-suck-la?"he asked. "Emmett if you don't get away from me with that right now,I swear to god I'll find a match..." she said without taking her eyes of the screen. He rolled his eyes and finished the rest in one bite. I wondered if he was born weird or if it was some defect from the c hange. Emmett pov I was so bored Bella and jasper have no sense of humor what so ever.

I wanted to teach bella something she would value. I stood up and pulled next me ignoring her complaints. "Now now belly-bean I'm sick of you being a vulnerable human" I began even though she growled. "Why do you need to teach everywere I g o i'm with a vampire" "yeah yeah but what if we weren't here you would probably get rape by the vile newton!!..."why am I sounding Edward?"damn-it jasper!!" "So rry I got carried away..." he said shamelessly and turned back to TV program and immediately engrossed. "fine..."She said unsure "OK this how to disarm an someo ne who attacks you from behind...jasper come help me" "i'd rather not..."he said softly. "please?please?please?please?..." "fine..." he sighed Jasper's pov "OK good now jazz try to rape Bella!!!" that sounded weird I walked up to and both h and on her shoulders "OK now Bella...what do you think you should do now?" he as ked "Call for for a strong sparkly vampire whose name begins with 'E'"she teased "Oh i'm flattered...maybe we should trying something smaller"he picked up a sma ll rock. "now Isabella I'm am the teacher and you are student if you can grab th is pebble out-" he was cut because Bella grab it ,smirking. "you're supposed to wait till say go!! no fair" he sounded like a 5 year old. "ok oviously I can han dle a pebble em so what do you have to say for yourself." she asked Emmett sulke d in the couch and muttered"SÍ sÍ sÍ se puede manejar un peble pero mirar los años anteriores y todos los mierda que causóseres humanos" "what?" she asked "nada nada...I mean nothing nothing" "What ever I'm thirsty" she went in the kit chen and and just stared at Emmett.

"what" he asked "you an idiot." "oh" "AAAHHHHHH!!!!!" I heard Bella scream. She began running around the room yelling "get it off get it off!!!!" There was some kind of skin attacted her shoe. Emmett rolled his eyes and grabbed Bella and fl ipped her upside down by her ankles and peeled it off. "Emmett!!!put me down!!!" she yelled "sorry" he dropped I caught before she hit the ground. "Thanks" she hiccuped "what was that Emmett" I asked. He shrugged"my snack" I'm almost 100% p ositive Emmett was dropped on the head when he was young. I layed Bella on the c ouch her eyes were closed and her breathing was uneven . "are you OK Bella" i as ked "yeah just a little thirsty" her voice was hoarse. Before I did anything Emm ett shove a Popsicle in her mouth ,she must not of realized it was a blood-pop b ecause she did object. "See my blood pops aren't that bad" he said smugly. Bella began choking and spitting everywhere. Bella's pov Idiot Jasper's pov idiot Emm ett's pov seres humanos... A/n:blood-pops!!!! OK OK translations:

SÍ sÍ sÍ se puede manejar un peble pero mirar los años anteriores y todos lo s mierda que causóseres humanos=yes yes yes you can handle a peble but look at the previous year and all the shit you caused...humans(something like that) sere s humanos...=humans... OK yeah remember REVIEWS MAKE ME HAPPY. ~*Kay*~ Chapter 2: Chapter 2: Games A/n:Ummm...Hi. Bella's pov "And I was like nuh-uh,"Emmett was telling us about his trip to the grocery store" and she was like,yah-huh,and I was like nuh-uh to infinity! And s he was like yah-huh to infinity and beyond... and I hit her with potatoes."He fi nished"That's how I got kick out of the grocery store" I was gaping, while every one was going about their business as this wasn't new. Jasper,Alice and Emmett w as babysitting me while the others hunted. Edward wouldn't bare not to have Alic e to see what's going on here. That started a whole new argument about how she's not some television set he came just tune in and out. And of course Emmett bein g Emmett made some stupid joke,and got smacked. Jasper was playing chess with Em mett,who was mumbling something about potatoes. Alice was shoping on the compute r grinning like a maniac. "Omg!!! Eww!!This is sooo vomitory!!" Alice yelled fro m the computer. â Alice, stop inventing words that no one else uses!!!â Emmett Ordere d like Carlisle. She stuck out her tounge before turning back to the screen. "Oh that's so fetch!!!" She exclaimed like Gretchen Wieners from Mean Girls(A/n : F unny movie) "Dammit Alice..." Emmett growled. "Check-mate!"Jasper exclaimed. "No your midget wife distracted me..." He mumbled.

" I'm not a midget you beast." She hopped up. "Yeah yeah whatever you frizzy hai red freak." He walked out of the room, after turning over the chessboard. "Culle ns are weird..." I muttered. "Not that weird." Jasper said. I forgot about their hearing. "Stupid shinny emo vampire hearing..." I said in a staged whisper. Sud denly sadness washed over me,and I burst into tears. "Fine you win." I sniffled " I always do" He said smugly " I'm hungry" I announced as got up and walked to the kitchen. Before I got half-way there Emmett came literally out of no where a nd knocked me down,which was a result of his excitement. "Let me make you someth ing Bells,can I,can I,can I..." He hovered over me. "You know what Edward said a fter the "blood pop" incident." "Edward can take his warning and shove it up his tight white a-"HE was cut off by the sound of his phone. He looked and whispere d "It's him" He said in a horror movie like voice. Slowly he passed to me ,afrai d. I,who was still on the floor pinned under Emmett, took the phone."Hello?..." I said breathlessly "Bella,love,How are you" He asked. "I..um..."I pulled the ph one from my ear to talk the Emmett" Can you get off me Emmett?" "EMMETT?!WHAT TH E HELL IS E.M.M.E.T.T DOING ON YOU!?!OH HELL TO THE NAW!!!!" Edward screamed fro m the phone. Emmett rolled off me and Jasper grabbed the phone."Geez Edward chil l..." "Yeah"Emmett yelled jumping into the conversation"SET HER FREE,LEAVE HER B E!!" "Emmett shut up or I'll have Carlisle and I kill you...again" Edward promis ed. "NOOOO"Emmett yelled"Give me justice or give me death!" he declared. And hun g up the phone.

"You're already dead dumbass..." I muttered. "But my heart keeps beating like a hammer..." He sang "That doesn't make sense" "I don't care that's my so-ong!" he sang. The phone rang and he clicked talk. "IF YOU EVER HANG UP ON ME AGAIN I SW EAR TO GOD I'LL CHOP YOUR B-"Emmett hung up quicky. "You should really stop doin g that, I have a feeling that he will actually chop your b-" Jasper stopped beca use the phone rang...again. Emmett answered "DAMMIT EMMETT!!!!!!!!!!!" Emmett sa t down on the couch and crossed his legs in a girly fashion."Who is this?" He as ked in a sweet high-pitched voice. Edward sighed. And there was a pause and some talking the background. "EMMETT!" Rose yelled, he looked like he was about to c rap himself. If that were possible. "Rose-"He started "Don't call me rose!Do I l ook like a damn flower to you?!DO I!!??"She demanded "I wouldn't know were on th e phone!" He snapped. "Burn!" I heard Carlisle say. Everyone paused after they h eard that. There was a long silence. "Umm...We'll see you guys later..."Edward h ung up. "Well that was weird..."Alice said from behind me. I jumped in surprise and fell Again. She grabbed my shoulder and pulled up and she sat on the floor n ext to me,in the living room. "We're playing a game..." Alice said,and the boys came immediately came in grinning like idiots. "What game..."I asked. "Just trut h or dare" She shrugged. "NO!NO! Do remember what happen the last time."I yelled ."She ...and ... him ..and

cookies oh so much cookies...and ..pigs...oh god all the pigs...."I trembled. "W ho first?"Jasper asked completely ignoring me. "ME ME oh PICK ME!!!"Emmett begge d,raising his hand like a child. "Ummm...Emmett" He choose."Truth or Dare" "DARE CAUSE I'M A MAN!!!"He boomed,unnecessary. "OK Emmett I dare you to scratch "Emm ett Was here" in Edwards precious." Emmett looked at me. "THE Piano!!!" Jasper y elled before Emmett did anything to me. "Ohhh..." He said. Then he got up and go t a knife. He Scratched "Emmett was Here" microsoftly in the sat down. "He won't see that" I said. "Yes he will he looks at that as much as he looks at you " Ja sper laughed at my blushed. "Alice truth or dare"Emmett asked. "Uhh Dare" She an swered. "I dare you to go to Walmart an out fit and wear it for of the evening." She turned Show white. And was stiff as stone. Alice's pov: !!!!!! Emmett's pov HA!!!This going to be swe-eet!!. "Come on let's go!" I ran to car. Bella stumbl ed out and Jasper came carrying A very frozen Alice. At Walmart... "No,no,no...K eep them away from me" Alice we dragged her into the clothes section. We set her in the isle, and she cream loud. "What is it Alice?" I asked. "Cotton mixes..." She whispered scared. I rolled my eyes. And gave her random clothes. She shoved them back and she picked out

her own and bought them. We waited buy the door. When she finished buying them,s he did not come back to us, she just went to the supplies center and brought, gl ue,scissors, and a she head for the bathroom. A few minutes later she came,looki ng like she step out of Vogue. "Alice what did you do?"Bella asked "I made it Al iceCullen-ified!!!" She sang. "Yeah I bet she used pixie dust" Bella muttered "Y ou'll regret that..." Alice said. I guess we all know who's Alice picking. Bella 's pov !!!! A/n: Yup yup chapter two. I need help with the truth or dares though so just lea ve me a suggestion and I'm look looking for beta and I still don't get that proc ess. ~*Kay*~ Chapter 3: Chapter 3: Games Part 2 A/n: OK I'm back. Yup Yup Yup it's time for Bella's and Jasper's Dare. Thx to tw ihard93 for helping me with Bella's dare....Read on!! Bella's Pov: "Alice, Alice please please Don't make me do this." I begged,as we were driving the car to my next dare. "Nope. A dare is a dare." She smiled. Wavi ng her bull-horn. "Next stop Mike Newton's House!!" Emmett Announced. "Remember your line Bella..." Jasper said " TEN words isn't hard to remember." Alice kinda defended me.

Mike's house... We were are facing his window. "What if his parents are home?" I asked trying to find a way out of this. "They're not,he's alone" They all answe red. "Do it Bella" Alice pushed the bullhorn into my hands . "Throw a rock at hi s window,I saw it in a movie once." Emmett gave me one. I threw and missed horri bly, Emmett sighed and got a rock and flung it at the window, causing the whole thing to shatter. I heard a high-pitched scream. I wondered it was Jessica Stanl ey. "I thought you said he was alone" I was on the road to panic. "He is..."Emme tt said. Silence... "Anyway...Bella its time" Alice sang. "Fine Fine..." I helde d the bullhorn to my mouth. Emmett made me sit on his shoulders. I frowned at th at. "3...2...1" "EDWARD CULLEN IS GOING TO BE MY NEXT BABY DADDY!!!!!!!!" I yell ed. Again,we heard a high-pitched scream and thudding. "What was that?" I said a s they laughed "He...Fainted...and...fell ..Down the stairs..."Emmett got out be tween breaths. " Is he going to be alright?" I asked,worried. "Yes" Alice answer "He's going to wake up in a few minutes...crying." "OK..." I said. "Oh he's so s prung..." Jasper laughed. "Ohh Jasper....truth or dare" I sang. "Ohhh no...Dare? " He said. "I-DARE-YOU-TO-GO-THE-THE-NURSING-HOME-AND-TALK-TO-THETROOPS-ABOUT-TH E-GREAT-WAR" I said in one breath. "No!No! they're ignorance in insulting!" He y elled."WE MUST RULE BY THE

SOUTH!!!THE SOUTH" He yelled running done the block. I looked at Alice for help. "Don't worry he'll do it... It won't be pretty he'll do a song number!!" At Dyaway Nursing home... We walked in and it Smelt the old people and death mixed to gether. "Eww...It smells like old people in here!!!"Emmett complained loudly. "Y oung man!!!" Some old lady gasped. "Ohh be quiet you hag" He replied" Hope you h ave a heart attack..." He muttered. "Emmett!!" "what?!!....We all know its going to happen can smell it." He replied knowing. We all looked at her and she was n ot looking so hot maybe he'll be right. "OK Jasper...There they are"Alice pointe d. He walked up them humming some song . I didn't here a thing from over here, b ut actions speak louder them words... Alice's pov... I stood with Bella and Emme tt watching Jasper do one or the hardest the thing in his life... "Hello sir,I'm Jasper C-Hale." He addressed the men in uniform. "Hello son...Such a polite You ng boy." A man nodded. "I see you guys were in the war" Jasper said stiffly. "Ye s son,we represented the great north" The gazillion year old looking man said pr oudly. "What was so great about it?" Jasper said harshly,losing his signature co ol. "Well.." The man grunted as he stood up" we did dominate the whole war exper ience unlike that SOUTH...damn Confederates." "The Conferderates...Are the ones who navigated the whole DAMN war..." "Well your CONFEDERATES screwed everything up!!" The man yelled. " Oh piss-off old man" Jasper yelled. "What just happened? " Bella asked, I forgot about her sensitive hearing.

Before I answered Jasper started Marching around the room singing loudly. Southe rn men the thunders mutter ! Northern flags in South winds flutter ! To arms! To arms! To arms, in Dixie ! Send them back your fierce defiance ! Stamp upon the cursed alliance ! To arms ! To arms! To arms, in Dixie CHORUS: Advance the flag of Dixie ! Hurrah ! Hurrah ! For Dixie's land we take our stand , And live or di e for Dixie ! To arms! To arms ! And conquer peace for Dixie ! To arms ! To arms ! And conquer peace for Dixie ! Fear no danger ! Shun no labor ! Lift up rifle , pike , and sabre ! To arms ! To arms ! To arms , in Dixie ! Shoulder pressing close to shoulder , Let the odds make each heart bolder ! To arms ! To arms ! To arms , in Dixie ! CHORUS Swear upon your country's altar Never to submit or fal ter To arms! To arms ! To arms, in Dixie ! Till the spoilers are defeated, Till the Lord's work is completed ! To arms ! To arms ! To arms , in Dixie ! CHORUS H e sang and marched right out of the room. Oh,and that lady did have A heart atta ck. Bella Pov I am never playing Truth or dare with Cullens ever again. A/N: I know the war jasper is talking about is probably not related to the soldi er's but just pretend. I didn't want people flinging their eclipse book at me. B ut hey a Angry Jasper is a funny Jasper!!

~*Kay*~ Chapter 4: Chapter 4 : My Sexy Vampire A/N: Ello loves!!!...I got a teddy Bear!! ...Idk too. The ride back was long and awkward. The only thing you can here was Emmett's occ asional chuckles. Even if it did turn out crazy, I was proud of my dare. "They'r e on their way now." Alice said suddenly. "Hit the gas." Jasper ordered. Suddenl y we were speeding down the high-way. I was holding on to Emmett for dare life,W hile screaming my head off. In no time we were in front of the house, I stumbled out dizzily, and my head felt like a hay-sack. "Nice look on you Belly-bean" Em mett ruffled my hair even more. " Emmett!!" I complained. "That's what all the g irls say"Emmett said smugly. "What girls!!!" I turned around to see Rosalie with her hands on her hips. Slowly I backed up not wanting to get involved,but me be ing me, tripped , I closed my eyes and waited for the impact of the floor, there was none, I looked up to see Edward with a smirk on his face. See this is why e veryone one should have a vampire boyfriend. "Hello, love" He whispered,in my ea r. "Yeah Hello Mr. Mood Swing." Emmett grumbled when he stormed past us. " I do not have mood swings!" Edward growled. "Edward calm down" I cooed "OK..." Edward instantly relaxed. "SEE!!!" Emmett threw his hands up in frustration. We were a ll gathered around the living room. It was really quietly. We were trying not me ntion any of the events that happened tonight. "Something happened tonight" Edwa rd growled.

"W-what makes you think that?" I said in a loud squeaky voice. "Alice is singing 'decode' backwards in her head, Jasper is translating the in"Yongle Dadian" in German and Emmett is Remembering his 'night' with Rosalie." He shuddered "S-so W hat's new?" Alice all but yelled. "Well...I over heard Jessica say to Lauren tha t Mike had the smallest d-" "Emmett!!!" Esme yelled. " What I was going to say D -deck." he said He turned to me and shook his head and pointed to his crocth. I, who was drinking some water spit it out everywhere, while having a coughing fit . He roared with laughter. "Something did happen..." Edward grumbled. "BELLA!!!" Alice yelled. "ALICE!!!" I yelled too. "Wanna show Eddie the song I taught you? " She bounced excitedly. "Sure..."I got up and so did Emmett. Me and Alice Emmet t and I sang together. I forgot to wear my cross tonight I left my garlic at hom e It's so dumb but it's so fun To wander 'round the city alone I'm runnin', fall in' down Chase me all around this town And now you've finally got me What am I t o do?(They pointed to me and I sung my part) Sexy vampire, I'm falling in love S o just bite me baby And drink all my blood Oh yeah Sexy vampire I'm falling in l ove with you So do what you want to do Sexy vampire I'm falling in love

So just bite me baby And drink all my blood Oh yeah Sexy vampire I'm falling in love with you 'Cause you need my plasma more than I do. Hey you wanna stop for a drink or two And maybe for a disco break here We'll party all night until the s un comes up You could say I'm raising the stakes. I'm runnin', fallin' down Chas e me all around this town And now you've finally got me What am I to do? Sexy va mpire, I'm falling in love So just bite me baby And drink all my blood Oh yeah S exy vampire I'm falling in love with you So do what you want to do Sexy vampire I'm falling in love So just bite me baby And drink all my blood Oh yeah Sexy vam pire I'm falling in love with you 'Cause you need my plasma more than I do....(W e all pointed to Edward) We were all in the hysterics by the end. Edward looked like we dissed his mother. He crossed his arm tightly on his chest and pouted. " Moooood swings...." Emmett sang sang like a hippi, Seriously he had the peace si gh and everything. Three things happened at the same time. 1) Edward lunged at E mmett. 2) Emmett screamed like a little girl. 3) They both crashed into the tabl e.

"No!!!" Esme screamed and fell to her knees. Jasper and Carlisle,peeled Edward o ff Emmett. "Wow Emmett wait until he finds out what you did to his piano...OOPS! !!" Alice said. "What?" Edward growled. "Well...we-were-playing-truth-or-dare-an d-they-dared-me-to-wear-this-god-awful-outfitthen-i-dared-bella-to-tell-mike-you r-her-next-baby-daddy-then-she-dare-jasper-to-talkabout-the-war-with-some-localold-people-and-he-ended-up-singing-and-marching-likea-crazy-person" She paused"O H!! you meant about your piano...Emmett scratch 'Emmett was here' in it" She sai d casually,looking at her nails. Emmett zoomed out door screaming like a girl An d Edward Soon followed. "Where are they going?" I whispered to Alice. "Canada" S he shrugged"You'll see them in a few days...Emmett will be missing a finger,But you see them." A/N: Short? I know, But I wanted to get this out Quick. I still need ideas for f uter chapters...you guys know what to do... ~*Kay~* Chapter 5: Chapter 5: Our Feelings A/n: Hey...It took me a long time think what finger Emmett should lose so I chos e something small and cute... Three long days later,Edward came back still furious- It was kind of hot but eve ry time I thought about that Jasper would shout it out and I would blush fire tr uck red. Emmett was missing his pinky finger,and he would all was complain about it ,until Rosalie said if he didn't shut up she would make the other match. I w as currently staring at Emmett's pinky finger in disbelief. The thing was still moving!!!! "Why is it still moving?" I asked quietly, to no one in particular. " Well dear" Esme began" it's the vemon its twice as better as a human's blood -th at's why we have to tear apart and burn a vampire to kill it successfully." She explained.

"ohhhhh..." I said. I moved my finger to touch it, and i swear to god I heard it hiss at me. I screamed and ran right out of the room, correction I ran right in to Edward. "What are you going to do the it?" I Asked, Walking back into the roo m. " I don't know maybe we'll burn it" He shrugged. "NO!!NO!!" Emmett came out o f no where- furious. "You will not-not- kill him. He is a part of this family as much as I am!!!" He roared. He's crazy. The Feaking monster was on his shoulder . "This family is nuts..." I muttered. Carlisle came down the stairs slowly. "Fa mily meeting." Carlisle announced quietly. In no time everyone was in the living room. "What's up?" Alice asked. "As if you don't know." Edward rolled his eyes. "Continue Carlisle" Alice said, ignoring him, "Well...this family is out of ord er." He said as if it explained everything. "Well of course, I'm mean this is a house full of vampire and one managed to fall in love with a human who manages t o get the Volturi on they're asses every minute." I said in one breath and plopp ed to the couch, exhausted. Everyone starred at me in shock. " Yeah..." I said" Continue ..." " Yeah well were going to family counseling." Silence... "Are you insane?!?!?" Emmett bellowed. " Nope just really smart ...you should try in out some time" Carlisle said curtly. "Oh very mature Carlisle" Emmett muttered. "Say s the person missing pinky" Carlisle threw back. "OK now I see why you guys need therapy." I laughed. All of them turned to me with their eyes brows raised. I g roaned... Later that day...

We were all in the waiting room. Everyone else was at ease while I fidgeted nerv ously. "Jeez Bella or you on that stuff or something,keep still" Emmett said. I stuck my tongue out at him. "Alice Number 2..." he mumbled. Before i could think of a good comeback we were called. "...Cullen Family..." A lady not to much old er then me called boredly. We walked slowly to my death. Edward's POV We walked into the small office and sat on the couch quietly and waited. " ARG This is alr eady a load of crap" Emmett all but yelled. "Can we leave..." "This B.s Is alrea dy sickening." "Childen" Esme scolded "We are a happy family, now we'll act like a happy family, because if this happy family doesn't act happyI swear on all th ings holy I'll ripped this friggin family to .happy .little .shreds!!" Everybody was silent,until to shrink walked in. "Hello ...Cullen Family I'm Dr. Stewart" "Hey" "hi" Sup" were scattered around. Huh. He thought. "How about we introduces ourselves." He suggested Carlisle stood up." I'm Carlisle and this is my family and my soon to be step daughter." Hmmmm Strong firm...I wonder if he beats them frequently He thought. I nearly choked on the air I was pretended breathe in. " YO,I'm Emmett , but you can care me big E , I love sports and pranks and my Rosi e." Emmett rapped. She made me say it bro He sighed in his head. I rolled my eye s. OK OK seems very Strong and competitive...might have a steroid problem and mi ght use humor at other people's expense to hide his true feeling and insecuritie s. He thought. I Buried my my head in Bells shoulder. This was going to be a lon g hour. Jeez Edward can you take hands off of her for one second.Emmett sighed i n his head. I growled to quietly for human ears to pick up.

"I'm TheRosalie and I'm awesome. I love fixing cars and going on campingtrips an d I love my monkey man EMMY." She said proudly. Top that!!!she thought to no one in particular. OK insecure about her flaws and uses the weaknesses of others to feel good about her self :problem drug user...remember to ask how much plastic surgery she has had. He noted. I couldn't hold it any longer. I quickly excused myself and left- ran- out the room. Once out of the room I burst into laughter. "Edward?" I heard Bella whispered from behind me. "The therapist has issues" I e xplained. she nodded. She reached up to kiss me. Immediately things got out of h and.I pinned her against her the door and kiss her jaw...chin...neck...shoulder. .. EDDIE DUDE ALL OF US CAN HEAR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!Jasper yelled and there were simi lar shouts from my family. I quickly broke away and she pouted. "Then can ...hea r us..." I explained embarrassed. "OH MY God..." She groaned. YEAH MAKE HER MOAN BRO Emmett yelled in encouragement. I quickly pulled Bella in through the door and we took our seats. It was very quiet and uncomfortable. Get to second base n ow did we Eddie? Emmett thought. I punched him in the back, to fast for human ey es." Son of a ...Mother" He yelled. "Is there a problem Emmett?" The Dr. asked. " No just A spasm..." He glared at me. "Ok now that we finished with introductio ns let's get down to business" The Dr. announced."What is the main concern in th is family?" "Well we seem to be fighting more and more" Carlisle Explained. "Wha t seems to cause all the tension?" All my brothers and sisters pointed to me. I glared At all of them. "Now children Everytime you point one finger there is alw ays three pointing back at you." Esme said. It took Emmett a full minute and a h alf to get the irony of it. "Why do you all think the problem is Edward?" He ask ed

"Well he has alotof tension" Emmett said,trying not to laugh. "Yeah,that's why h e's so STIFF." Jasper snickered. "Well Eddie-kins has this...malady" Emmett expl ained "What is it?" he asked. "Well its..."He began. "Emmett I swear to God..." I warned. "Its..." "Emmett..." "VIRGINITY!!" He Boomed, in disgusted. I lunged a t him for the third time this week. Carlisle and Jasper sighed at peeled me off. We sat in silence for a while. "So...Emmett why do think Virginity is a malady? " He asked " Well I know, We know ,even forks high knows they want each other an d you can practically her them sucking faces from his bedroom." He fumed. "So wh at your saying is that you think your brother is repressed.?" He asked "YES!!!!" He rejoice. "Well at least I'm not a sex addict!!! Ask them when was the last t ime they had sex ,Go ahead asks them!" I urged. "Well...Rosalie,Emmett when was the last time you had relations?" He asked "Well..In the Supplies closet room... of your waiting room..." He muttered. The Man turned beat red. Filth pure filth. ..note to self ; Hose down closet. He thought. "Do you believe you have a proble m?" He asked Rose and Emmett " No" "Really?" "Yes" "OK moving on." He said quick ly. "Now Alice...some people say you have a shopping addiction; why don't we dis cuss

that." He said. " Well doc just because I don't want to be wearing the same outf it for the rest of my life, doesn' t mean I have a addiction" She snapped. Perso nality disorder;prescibe medication. He wrote down. "She does has a problem ; wh en we were snowed in she took out her summer clothes and turned the basement int o a store and shopped around ,talking to herself for hours!" Bella exclaimed. "I s that true?"He asked. "Yes..." She admitted. He looked over his note pad for so meones mind to prick. "Um Isabella..." "Bella." We all corrected. Defencive she must be special in the head I wonder if she's the same girl from.... He thought. "Yeah..." She said quietly. "It says here your engaged to ...Edward." "Yes" " A re you happy that your marrying him?" "Yes..." Soft point He thought. "How many times did he ask before you said yes." " I don't know why you need to know that! " I growled. Defencive -dominant boyfriend;probably beats her. He thought. I gro wled softly. "That many times huh?" He was trying with my patients. "Doc I sugge st you back off ,Edward can sometimes lose control...we all can" Emmett warned a nd almost spilling the beans. "What do you mean by control?" He asked "Uh...Uh.. " He was backpedaling now. "Well.." He urged

"EDWARD HEARS VOICES IN HIS HEAD!!" Emmett exclaimed. All my sibling snickered a nd Bella Groaned. He leaned forward,to me" Do you? Do you Edward? Do you hear vo ices in you head?" He spoke as if I belonged in a asylum. I looked around ,but e veryone looked amused and anticipated my answer."Yes" I sigh. Holy crap!! And I thought he was kind of normal He thought warily. "And what do the voices tell yo u?" HE asked. "I'll tell you what they tell him!!!" Emmett roared" They tell him to go all crazy and rip off my freaking finger!!" Emmett waved his four-fingere d hand in his face. "Now why did you do this?" He asked "Just because I wrote so me on his precious piano." "Does this happen often?" He asked "Yes" they all ans wered "Huh.." He huffed. Someone new someone new He looked over the sheet. "OK . .Jasper Hale" Jasper cursed in his head" Yes" "I hear you can be very Emotional. .." "I'm not Emotional!" "Really?" "Yes." "OK let me ask you a question." He got up and went to whisper in his ear; not obvious to the fact that we can hear him ."Are you gay?" "I'm not gay!!!" He roared. We all broke out into laughter while Jasper crossed his Legs and arms and pouted. "Now Esme how do you discipline yo ur children?" He asked. "Well I take away the things they enjoy;Edward's piano,A lice's credit cards,Jasper's books, Rosalie's car, Emmett's alone time with Rosa lie..."She said.

"Interesting..." "Emmett had said "Bella is accident prone..." How do you feel a bout that" He changed the subject. "Well ,I'm not Bad" She defended ,there was a chorus of scoffs from around the room. "Yeah right. Coming from the only girl w ho can trip sitting down." Emmett snorted. These clients are worse then Newton H e groaned. I tried to hide my laughter by coughing. What is it Emmett and Jasper both asked. "Newton Goes here.." I said quietly. Jasper's laughter was quiet bu t Emmett's was loud and booming. Oh I gotta get my hands on that file Emmett was already planning. "Well look at the time" He said suddenly. " Yeah Let's go" Ja sper walked out without hesitation. We all walked out with the Dr. Well Except E mmett ... "Well thank you for coming and I looK forward to counseling your famil y in the near futer." Please say no please say no!!He chanted. "We're sorry to o bliged but i don't think counseling is the right thing right now." Carlisle said THANK GOD!!!!!! He thought. "Well that's to bad..." ha said. Emmett came rushin g out grinning like an idiot. He walked right past us and headed to the car. "We ll we shoulder take our leave..." We all went to car and sat in silence for a mo ment . Emmett was reading over Newtons profile Which I had no interest in ,until Bella's name register into his thoughts. "Listen to this. Name: Micheal Gilbert Newton Age: 17 Issue: Obsessed with a teenaged girl name Bella swan...Says has dreams and sexual fantasies..."

We all groaned... The longest chapter I ever wrote... So I hope to get even more reviews! Next cha pter they'll probably be back At school ...I don't know . Send me a suggestion! ~*Kay*~ Chapter 6: Chapter 6: Stickers I woke up, to my bed vibrating. I groaned and buried my head in my pillow. The v ibrated wouldn't stop, I gave on trying to get more sleep and sat up and screame d. "Alice!!!" I scream"Why are you in my bed!?!" "I won a bet with Edward and I get to wake you up this morning!!" She yelled, excited. "Ugh..." I groaned. Now I had to endure hurricane Alice. "Come on,come,on, get up get up get up." She be gan bouncing again. The vibrating feeling came back again. I was getting Nauseou s so I hoped out the bed. But like I always do, I tripped, I waited for the impa ct of the floor. I felt it. See this is why people should have they're vampire b oyfriends wake them up! "Alice!" I exclaimed" Didn't you see that coming?!" I pi cked my self up. "Pain is weakness leaving the body" She shrugged. I scoffed and went to the bathroom to get ready. After I showered,I ran back to my room. I to ok out someone clothes. I turned around to put them on and Alice was there with her hand over her heart looking betrayed. " What?" I asked " You... think... tha t... i'll ...let...you...wear... that?" She gasped. I groaned and sat on the bed . She She pulled,plucked and pampered almost everywhere on my body. "Voila!" She said when she was finally done. "Good" I said " Let's go" "Wait one more thing. ..." She said slowly. And put something on my left shoulder. "What is that" I be gan turning like a dog just to see what is.

"Its nothing" She said" Come on Edward's waiting!" I immediately turned my atten tion from what ever she put on me and ran out the door. Edward's volvo was alrea dy outside, waiting. I skipped like A Alice,to his car. "Did you endure Alice th is morning? He said when we got out of his car in the school. "Yeah" I said" How 'd you know" His hand went to my back shoulder and pulled something off of it. H e turned to me. It was a sticker saying: *A Alice Cullen Miracle!!* I groaned lo ud and ripped it to microsoftic pieces. "Where did she get that?" I asked as we walked to class. "She bought a sticker maker" He shrugged. Only AliceI thought s haking my reached the class room by now. Alice was the only one that was able to transfer in . We said bye and I took A seat. "Hey Bella!" Mike said right in my ear. I flinched away from his eagerness. I suddenly remember his file from the therapy session and scooted as far possible away from him. He just came closer. I groaned inwardly. "Hey Bella , guess what i had a dream last night and we were -" He began Alice danced in And cut him off. "Hey Bella" She said" Wanna sticker ?" "No Alice I don't a sticker" I questioned her sanity. "Fine" She shrugged and sat down. Class began and she turned to get a book from her bag. On her Shoulde r was a sparkly sticker: *You Wish You Can Be This Shiny!!* I choked with laught er, And laughed at the irony of it all. " Is there something funny?" the teacher demanded. I blushed and shook my head vigorously. He scoffed and turned back to the board. Alice looked at me and smirked. She showed me her other shoulder and I burst in laughter. The other sticker said:

*Beware I BITE!!! ;* "Swan One more time and its to the Office!" He yelled. I ju st shook my head and bit my lip. He turned back around. From next to me, Alice n udged me . I turned to her and saw she had her sticker maker out. She finshed an d pointed to mike who head was down and point to the sticker she was covering. I n one quick movement she was out of her seat and back again. In the same moment mike yelp. He looked up and there was huge sticker on his forehead. ~I'M QUEER I'M HERE- GET USED TO IT!!~ Alice and I roared with laughter. The teacher spun a round beat red. "CULLEN...SWAN...OFFICE!!!" He pointed to door. We both hurried out the door .Alice Paused and turned back to the door and put a sticker next to his name plate (NEEDZ 2 GET LAID!) Our laughter filled the hallways as we went the office. Alice stopped and turned to me"Bella do you really want to go the of fice?" "Who does?!?" "OK Let's not." She said as if it solved all problems. She got out the the machine and began typing again. "Who's the next victom?" I asked when was done . She just walked until we stopped at lauren's locker. She printe d the stick and put the locker and I burst into laughter. PLANNED PREGNANTCY HAS ME ON SPEED DIAL!!! "You know who would be very good at this?" She asked. "Emme tt" I said. "You're physic" She said as we dashed down the hall to his class roo m. "How are we going to get him out?" I asked when we were in front of his door. "He'll get himself out" She said. She poked her head in the window for 5 second s and leaned against the locker patiently. Emmett pov: I was currently singing " Senual seduction" By snoop Dogg just to tic off eddie. When I saw Alice's head p op up in the window of the door.

You-have-to-come-now-i-don't-care-how-you-break-out-we-need-your-masterties-with our-little-prank-you-have-three-minutes-and-counting.And with that her head disa ppeared. I must of had the stupidest grin on my faces because my classmates were giving weird looks. I Jumped and started yelling. "THE VOICE. I HAVE HEARD THE VOICE. THE GREAT ONE HAS SPOKEN!!!" " SIT DOWN!!!" "THE VOICE TOLD ME TO STAND!! !" I yelled. "CULLEN!!!" "I AM YOU LEADER"I said in a scary voice"I ORDER YOU TO BE SILENT!!!" Everyone was shying away. I took that as my que to leave. 99 seco nds a personal best... Bella pov: The screaming had stopped and Emmett walked ou t. "What took so long?" Alice demanded. "Dammit Alice let me have my moments" He shot back. "Can we get back to the main issue here?" I asked. "Ok...Emmett we'r e attacking people with stickers" She said. "Intresting..." He went into thought . "Who's next?" "...Jessica..." She answered. "I have the perfect one" We all he aded for her locker. Alice and Emmett made the sticker and slapped it on her loc ker. *MY Gynecologist HAS MY PERSONAL NUMBER* I looked at them" It's true" They nodded. "Ew..." "OH I have the perfect one for Eric."Emmett Whispered. "Why are you whispering?" I whispered. "BECAUSE ITS FUN!!" He whispered-yelled. "CUT THE CRAP AND GO!!" Alice yelled.

"Jeez..."Emmett and I said and stalked to the made the sticker and stuck it on a nd walked away. * MRS. MICHEAL NEWTON* I looked at Alice." The chances are likel y" "EW..." "Who's else is there?" We did most ofo the students I knew. "Teachers !" Emmett whispered. "ooh!" I had a good one. We snuck off to his classroom. He was in the middle of a intense lecture. "Hey Rose is in this class!" I told them . We shared a look and Emmett stuck his head in the window and waited. While put the sticker on. Rosalie's POV: I caught my reflection in someones book bag and found something to do. I saw Emmett's head in the window and I nearly fell out m y seat. He gave me a hand signal to come. I thought about it for a slick moment and I shrugged anywhere else is better then here. I got up and walked to the des k" Mr. Banner I have to go the bathroom" At least I can leave in a civil manner. "Certainly Rosalie" He leaned forward smiling. EW... I quickly left. Outside wa s Alice Emmett and Bella I had a bad feeling we were going to get into alot of t rouble. "What's up?" I asked They pointed to the door. I HAVE A THING FOR BLONDE S! "EW..." I said. "I have a good one for couch Clapp" I announced. And walked t o the gym. I had my sticker in my hand. I pretended I tripped and I grabbed on t o him and successfully put the big sticker on his back. "Are you ok ?" He gasped "Yeah yeah..." I skipped back to them, they didn't se the sticker yet so I pick ed up a ball and threw it, Probably with a little to much effort, and got him to turn around and showed the sticker.

I'M BIG AND I'M BEAUTIFUL! They all burst out in laughter. We continued down the hallway searching for more victims. Bella's pov: We were talking about our next person and literally Edward appeared out of nowhere. "We are in trouble now" I heard Emmett and a simultanious scoff from Alice And Rosalie. "How you know we w ere up to something?" I asked when we were walking again. "Well were I saw stick ers everywhere and When I saw Rosalie trip" He scoffed. "Well we were bored"Alic e shrugged. "One more for the fun it?" Emmett asked. "Tyler" I said. And walked away making the sticker. We heard approaching footsteps and heard the teachers v oice around the corner. I hurried to finish it. "13 seconds!" Alice hissed. I st uck it on and dashed down the hallway. I RUN OVER PEOPLE FOR FUN! When we were o ut of sight we all sighed. "You guys really need to find a hobby." Edward said. We all shrugged and made it back to the original class room. Days with the Culle ns are never normal. A/N: There...I didn't think this was my best work :( Commen t to keep my spirits up ^^^ Chapter 7: Chapter 7 : The Chase A/N: I'm starting school in like 8 days so i'm trying to get out as much chapter s as I can.

*Sigh*Would Edward learn not to leave me with thing 1 and thing 2? Well at least Rosalie's here to bite there heads off if they get out of control. The only thi ng we agree on is they're stupidity. "OK this is wicked boring." Emmett sighed. He as been using the word wicked since he seen . I sighed. "I second that" Jaspe r said too. "We should go to a club" Emmett suggested, like he was saying "Hey l et's go to the movies!" but he was really saying "Hey let's get Bella drunk and see what crap she could get herself into!" "That's even stupider then your starr ing contest" I said. "How is it stupid?" Emmett asked, defending his stupid game . "You guys are vampires!!" I said. "But I still won!" He said, and I heard Jasp er snort. "How?" Rosalie asked, speaking for the first time tonight. "It takes, strength , determination,knowledge,skills-" He began "You punched Jasper in the eye!!" I interrupted. "- And a wicked awesome right hook ." He added. I groaned sat backs down"Idiot" "Yup" I heard Rosalie agree softly. "Well I'm going you gu ys are just prudes."Emmett said getting up. "You are not going " Rosalie ordered " I'm babysitting you too!" "Baby sit this!" He dashed out the door, with Jasper on his heels. I Rosalie froze for a second then dashed out the door. I was just sitting there for a few seconds so confused. Hey no babysitters! As soon as tha t thought registered in my head. Rosalie zoomed back in furious. "I forgot..." S he said grabbing my arm." Let's go" and we zoomed into the night. (Awesome line or what?) "Where did they go?" I asked, when we finally stopped. "They're scent is around here somewhere..." She said looking around. "Oh this will be a fun nig ht." I said sarcastically. And that's how the chase began.

Emmett's POV: I'M FREE!!I'M FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!OH JASPER LOOK A PENGUIN!!!! A P ENGUIN!!!!!!!! Bella's Pov: "They're in the zoo!" Rosalie said suddenly,making m e jump. "How creative" I muttered. "I'm going to feed them to the bears!" "To th e zoo then!" I said, trying to ease the mood. She actually chuckled and helded o ut her hand. I took it and we zoomed into the night again. Jasper's POV: "Pengui ns are sooooo pret-" I began "HOLY CRAP JASPER THEY'RE GAINING ON US!!" Emmett y elled. "What do we do? What do we do?" I began pacing. "Get a hold of yourself m an!!" Emmett grabbed me and slapped me. "DUDE WHAT THE HELL?!" I punched him in the face. "WHAT! I saw it the movie,jeez." He muttered. Rubbing his head,pouting . "Out of all places" I heard Bella say. "Holy Flying Bananas We're going to Die !!!" Emmett panicked. "Where are we going to go?" I asked,pacing again. "The ... The...Cemetery!!" He said. and zoomed away. While I shuddered. "Dead people frea k me out" "Once I find them they are soooo dead,Bella" I heard Rosalie say,not t o far away. "To the cemetery" I muttered to myself and left quickly. Bella's POV : We finally reached the gates and Rosalie heaved me over, and she flipped over gracefully. "Where are they?" I asked as we began walking.

"I don't know they're scent is hear but..." She looked confused. "Let's split up " I suggested. She shrugged and disappeared,leaving alone with the sleeping anim als. I began walking slowly ,listening to the faint sounds of the animals.I walk ed slowly to the bears to check if Emmett wanted to play with them or something. "Emmett!"I hissed quietly"Emmett! This is not funny get out here now!" I stompe d my foot and point the ground in front of me. I heard a weird chortaling sound from behind me . I turned around slowly praying it was not what I think it was. I turned around and triend to scream but nothing came out. "Ro...Ro..." I tried to call out but my voice didn't work. There was three huge wolve chortaling in f ront of me. I paused my attemts to call Rosalie and just stared at them. It took me awile to put 1 and 1 togther but I finnally got it and"JACOB BLACK THAT IS N OT FUNNY!!!!" I yelled, at them all not sure which one jacob . They roared in wh at I assumed was laughter and dissappeard behind the tree and came back laughing so hard they tumbled over. "BELLA...BELLS. THAT WAS FUNNY!!" Jacob gasped. Quil and Embry tried to get up but they just fell over again and burst out laughing. "RO...RO..." They mimicked me. "W-who the hell is RoRo?" Jacob asked,trying to compose him self. "Actually,I was calling Rosalie. You know the vampire who hate s werewolves." I said,they stopped laughing immediately. "You got that right" Ro salie said from behind me,with her hands on her hips. "Did you find them?" I ask ed. "Nope...They left,"She said"Their scent is gone" "Who are you looking for?" Jacob asked. "Emmett and Jasper. Those two alone in this town equals a big probl em" I explained. "Awesome. We'll help." Quil said" I love playing detective!" "O K!" Let's go quickly" I said I wanted to hurry up and find them all ready. Three Werewolves, a vampire and a human looking for to crazy two vampires at night is a disaster waiting to happen. "OK scooby come on boy!" Rosalie snapped her fing er at them.

"Hey"Jacob said as we walked out of the zoo."What does a blonde put behind her e ars to make her look attractive?" We ignored him and kept walking. Even though R osalie gave me the cold shoulder when I first met her those blonde jokes were an noying. "Her ankles" They burst into laughter. "Hey Rosalie" I said" How do you stop a werewolf from attacking you?" "I don't know. How?" She smiled "Throw a st ick and say fetch!" We both laughed. They muttered something like"truce" and pou ted,which cause me and Rosalie to laugh again. It was quiet after a while as we walked. "They're in the freaking cometary!" She roared. "Dead people .Out" I sai d. "I'll protect you"'' Quil said wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. "Is he hav ing a facial spasm?" Rosalie said in a staged whisper. I burst out laughing. "Ye ah Yeah keep walkin'" He muttered. Emmett Pov: DEAD PEOPLE RULE!! We walked thro ugh the cemetery. It was freaking awesome. Jasper kept whisper some b.s . "What' s are you saying?" I asked , as I sat on someone tombstone. "Get off that!"Jaspe r screeched, and kept doing signed of the cross. "Why?" I asked" Nothing gonna h appen" I began dancing on the grave. "Hey person come out and play.." I sang. "D ude" Jasper said"Not place is giving me a bad vibe." "Oh please..." I waved him off. "No really cut the crap" "How about you shut your mouth that's where the cr ap is coming out of" I muttered(Family guy woo-hoo) "No man" Jasper said " i rea d that you shouldn't mess with the rest with the dead in their resting place , t hey will be very pisse-" He stopped and his eyes widened,looking at

something behind me. I slowly turned turned and we both screamed. "!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" IMPORTANT A/N READ: Cliffly ...better review or you won't find out! na-nana-nana -NA!!. Questions: You think there should be a real ghost or like some kinda of j oke because I already began writting 2 alternate endings for the this. P.S: this story is not going to transform into to a horror story...Just so you know. Chapter 8: Chapter 8 : The Chase Part 2 Disclaimer: blah blah blah...I don't own twilight.. It's close to midnight and s omething evil's lurking in the dark Under the moonlight, you see a sight that al most stops your heart You try to scream but terror takes the sound before you ma ke it You start to freeze as horror looks you right between the eyes You're para lyzed"Jacob shut up" I was already terrfied as it is. I was clutching on to Rosa lie's Cold arm as we walked up the hill of the gaveyard. You hear the door slam and realize there's nowhere left to run You feel the cold hand and wonder if you 'll ever see the sun You close your eyes and hope that this is just imagination, girl! But all the while you hear the creature creeping up behind You're out of time The boys skipped to the front an began singing loudy. 'Cause this is thrill er, thriller night There ain't no second chance against the thing with forty eye s, girl Thriller, thriller night You're fighting for your life inside a killer, thriller tonight

cause this is "!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" We heard from the other side of the graveyard. They boys stopped singing . That sounded alot like Jasper and Emmett . "See this why people shouldn't be at the cemetary at night" I yelled " Its sui cide!!! Didn't anyone see thriller?!" "What do we do? What Do we do?" Quil began pacing. "I say let's go up there." Rosalie began walking up. "Have you lost you r blasted mind?!" I screeched. "If blondie's going we're going" The boys walked up. "That's ok i'll just stay here and wait." I called. "Are you sure?" Jacob ca lled back. I was about to say yes but I heard something move from afar and I ins tantly began walking up. "There's no such thing as 's no such thing as 's no suc h thing as ghosts..." I murmured. "Jeez Bells really? You hang out with vampires and werewolves on a daily bases and you're afraid of a ghost that may or may no t be real." "How do you know?" I snared. "Well i'm a dog" He shrugged " I can se nse these things" " Whatever..." "Trust me there is no such thing as a-" "GGGGGG HHHHHOOOOOSSSSSTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" We heard them again , but it was even closer. Their screams of fear and got closer until they appeared at the top of t he hill and ran down. "I believe I proved my point" I crossed my arms ,and nodde d to Emmett and Jasper who were now in fetal position. "THEY'RE ALIVE THEY'RE AL IVE THE END IS HERE RUN FOR YOUR FREAKING LIVES!!!" Emmett brawled. "What's aliv e. And why are we still here" I began to fidget. "DEAD PEOPLE ...GROUND!" Jasper said. "OK now that we found them let's go!" I said. "Yeah this place gives me t he creeps" Rosalie said.

She picked up Emmett and began walking. Quil and Embry picked up Jasper. I walke d next to Jacob. And he bagan humming. Soon his ppack started singing all the wa y back to the Cullen house. 'Cause this is thriller, thriller night There ain't no second chance against the thing with forty eyes, girl Thriller, thriller nigh t You're fighting for your life inside a killer, thriller tonight... I guess we' ll never know what they saw tonight. A/n: This is a really sucky chapter I know. I'm writing the next today,promise. P.S- Read my new story "My best friend's brother" on my profile. ~Kirstii~ Chapter 9: Chapter 9 : Ventilation errors Today Edward sent Emmett to wake me up. Well it ended with me screaming bloody m urder as I was soaking wet. After the after that the process of going to school was pretty event full. "Why do you have a lighter?" I asked Emmett ,when we pull ed into the parking lot. "Well I tried to smoke" He answered while we walked to Alice and Jasper. Edward was hunting with Rosalie and Esme. "And how did that wo rk out?" I asked. "Didn't do a damn thing." He muttered. "Well then." I said. I went to my locker to get my books for calculus. "So Bella how are you to day?" I turned around to see Mike breathing heavily. I think I just gaged a little. "Um ..fine" I said awkwardly" Thanks." I turned back to the locker to find my damn b ook. Come on Come on...

"So what are you doing later?" Crap! "I was going to hang out with the Cullens" I answered immediately. "Maybe you should take a break from them" He murmured ,s aid sauntering forward. "Ew..." Slipped out my mouth before I could stop my self . He put his hands on my hips and moved south. "MIKE! WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO RAPE POOR BELLA?!?!" Emmett's voice boomed from down the hallway . Everyone turned a round to at me -who was horror stricken - and mike -who was drooling a little"Ew ,ew,ew,ew..." I whimpered. "MIKE REMOVE THE HAND!" Emmett came storming down the hallway . Mike moved his hand and stepped away , terrified. Emmett came up to h im and grabbed him by the shirt and lifted him up . By now everyone was crowding us. I still disgusted that he put his hands on me. "I...uh...I" He stammpered. "Really do think Dr,Stewart would like that?" He asked trying to keep from laugh ing. I groaned we were not to speak of that ever again. "How do you know about t hat?" He asked "Well us Cullens have connections" He said, them pulled him close r to whisper in his ear" And we can make people dissapear!" Mike squealed a litt le , Emmett pulled his hand back and snapped it forward and stopped a centimeter away from face. Mike was still screaming though. Emmett put him down and Mike r an away but also he ran right into a open locker . He fell and passed out. Great that would come back to bite us in the butt. "What going on here?" A voice that rang with aurthority yelled from down the hall way. "Emmett punched Mike!!" Eve ryone said. "Did not" Emmett and I said. "He ran into a locker" I pointed to his unconscious figure. "Well you and the Cullens have been starting mayhem" She sa id turning around " You both have detention" Crap! "Well isn't that great" He sa id. "Shush...just Shush "I said leaning on my locker. "You know it wasn't my fau lt" He said as we walked to Calculus.

"Really? Then who?" I asked incredulously. "Jasper!" He burst-out laughing. "Tha t traitor" I gasped." Oh he's gonna pay!" "Do I smell and an adventour?" Emmett asked "Yes yes you do" "Theme song!" He yelled. Team Chaotix... Once upon a time , you could be a bad guy and you`d live to see another day. But now you`d never manage, Boy, you`d be BRAIN DAMAGED just to think that you could get away. The p ower has arrived in a dream team. A force where one and one makes you see. And w hen the trails go cold, and the lies have been told. This crew will find what yo u can`t see! Yeah, danger hides when the hyper bee flies and the ninja stars fly too. The muscle-us Vector, the karma collecter, has sworn to fight for you!

TEAM CHAOTIX! They`re detectives you want on your side! TEAM CHAOTIX! They`re di rectives, tracking down your crimes... Come along for the ride! Truth can run bu t not hide. For all, the game is on, now!! Remember when stealin` used to be a g ood dealin`, When the crooked life would always pay? Well, now that the team`s i n town, that all gone underground. But it`s a worry to this very day! A challang e has been issued by the Emoman! This mission`s gonna need them all. And though his hopes grow thin, And the outlook is grim, These peeps are gonna heed his cal l! Yeah, Charmy`s thing is dishin` out first sting as the green one cheers them on! Espio is clearly ready to go I doubt they`ll do you wrong. TEAM CHAOTIX! The y`re detectives

you want on your side! TEAM CHAOTIX! They`re directives, tracking down your crim es... Come along for the ride! Truth can run but not hide. For all, the game is on! TEAM CHAOTIX! Sonic Heroes, what`s you`re problem please? TEAM CHAOTIX! Watc h those three go make the outlaws bleed... There`s no way you can win... (TEAM C HAOTIX!) ...if it`s trouble you`re in... They`re gonna kick your.... (Gong Noise ) We walked into humming softly, thinking about our plan. I sat down . "Pssss... " I heard and ignored it "Psssss..." What is that ? "PSSSSS!" Everyone was shift ing in their seat in annoyance. "BELLA SWAN!!!" Emmett boomed from he seat acros s the room. "WHAT?!" I yell. "Hi..." "SWAN...CULLEN...QUIET!!" The teacher yelle d

Suddenly a piece of paper flew at my head and I shrieked and everyone looked at me. I blushed and read the note. I have an idea! doesn't it involve me getting h urt? no... liar there's a possibility if I get hurt i'll let Edward ripped off t hat finger again ok ok you won't get hurt good good now my plan starts in 3...2. ..1... "Will the owner of a blue Chrysler please move it you are blocking a stud ent in" A voice said over the speaker. "I'll be back don't move" He said walking out. Emmett and I went to door. "I'll be back don't move" He said like the teac her and I burst out laughing. "Where are we going? " I asked when he paused in t he halls. "Above" He said in a ominous voice. "You going to kill me aren't you?" I accused only half joking. "Just be quiet and follow me ok?" He walked to a ve ntilation gate. With a small twist a pulled it off. "Ladies first" He looking do wn "Are you kidding you want us in the vents?" I gasped. "Yu that's the plan" He said. " Well you should go first" I said "I don't know the way" "Fine" He climb ed in . How? I'll never know . I climbed in after his. "What are we doing" I whi spered after a few moments of crawling but I kept thinking We're in the Vent !TH E VENTS... "We're just going to drop in on Jasper" He chuckled .This will not en d well. Jasper POV: I kept sensing mischief from somewhere around here but I cou ldn't find where it was

comeing from. I heard a softy bang from above"Ow..." "Shhh...Bella" "Do you thin k he heard us?" She asked "I don't know..." "Kay...my head hurts." "Shhh" My fac e of been scary because my neighbor shyed away from me I was beyond pissed. What ever they where planning was not good Bella's POV: "Are we there yet" I was get tingextremely claustrophobic. "Yep just a few more-" The vents moaned violently. "Oh god..." I whispered backing away slightly "I asure everything is going to b e-" The vents gave out and he fell from it and into Jasper class room. "Emmett!" I hissed. "HOLY FLYING CRAP" a girl yelled shooting up from her seat" EMMETT CU LLEN JUST FELL FROM THE CEILING . ITS A SIGN THE END IS HERE!!!! THE SKY IS FALL ING!!! RUN FOR YOUR FRIGGING LIVES!!!!" I couldn't move. Emmett stood up and dus ted himself off. "So uh...teach are you gonna mark me tardy?" Every starred at h im as if he had a third eye. "oh no..." I moaned softly. "WHY DID FALL FROM THE VENTILATION SYSTEM?!" The teacher yelled after a while of silence. "Well anyone could walk through the door!" He said in a 'duh' tone. Jasper shook his head fai ntly. "Well look at that" Emmett said looking around" I'm in the wrong class roo m." And he walk - skipped- out. And leaving me .

Emmett's Pov : It has been Three periods after the whole vent incident and Jaspe r refused to look at me. "I'm tell that wasn't funny?" I said when we were at th e table. "What provoked you to do that?!" Alice screeched. "Jasper messed with B ella..." I said slowly. I was forgetting something very important. "How?" "You k now I completely forgot" I asked. "Where's is Bella any way?" Rosalie asked. We all looked up slowly. "...Oh....Crap....." Chapter 10: Chapter 10 : Back And Forth "Let me get this straight" Carlisle began for 10Th time this hour," You left Bel la in the vent and went to lunch?" "No you have it all wrong" I sighed " We craw led in the vents , I fell and left then went class, then I went to lunch." "Is t hat any better?" He said , staring at me darkly. "Well I just wanted you to get my facts straight" I muttered. "Ok " He pinched his nose bridge and began again" What were you doing in the vent?" "It was for a very legitimate purpose" I said "Humor me." "Uh..." I was getting out blanks " Jasper was being mean!" I yelled pointing at him. "Was not!" "Was to!" "No!" "Yes" Meanwhile....

Ed POV: "Edward dear" Esme said again " I assure you she's fine, relax" "You can 't calm him down" Rosalie snickered " His anxiety will work him into a early gra ve" Esme and I gave her a look. "What!" She asked " You walked right into that o ne!" I turned back around in my seat. "I miss Emmett." I heard her mutter. "I mi ss Bella" I said. "I miss Carlisle" Esme sighed. Suddenly the phone rang. Esme a nswered it and put it on speaker. "Doesn't anyone miss ME!!!!!" Alice screeched. "We miss you Alice!" We all said flatly. "Make me believe it!" She ordered. "We miss so much. You kept our hearts when we left!" "Much better....Ok bye-bye now keep missing me!!" The line dead. "Crazy bitch" Rosalie said, closing her eyes. Then phone rang and Esme pressed talk. "HEARD THAT!" "GOOD!!" "SHUT UP!" "NO YO U!!" "YOU FIRST!" "YOU!" "YOU" Meanwhile..... Bella's POV: "NU-UH!"

"YA-HUH" "Boys quiet!!" Carlisle finally said. "But-" Emmett began. "Zip!" Carli sle said. "C' mon-" Jasper said "UH-uh!" "What about-" "Shh!" "This is crap!-" " Nope!" "Argh kill me now!!" I fell back to the couch. Meanwhile in the car... EP OV "Dwarf!" I heard Alice gasped. "...Bottle blond!!" Rosalie gasped and her han ds flew to her hair. "Not true" She squealed "yeah sure!" "At least I didn't buy from the "sale" rack at pranda. Ha!" "Oh you take that back!!" "Make me!!" "... ." "That's what I thought" Rosalie sat back smug. There was a loud crash from th e line and it went dead. "What did she do?" She yelled. Without warning she dive d out the window and raced home. Meanwhile back at the house...

Bella POV: We just heard a loud crash from the garage and Alice came back smilin g like she won the lotto or something. "What was that?" carlisle asked flatly , rubbing his temples, exhausted. "Is was just trying to fix Rosalie's car and... the rench just slipped..." She said innocently. "Alice?" Emmett asked looking at her like she was crazy. "Hmmm?" "Do you like that outfit?" He asked " Yeah why? " She asked twirling. "Because there is a high chance you'll be buried in it." " Don't be silly!" She laughed lie a maniac "I think she's finally gone senile " I whispered. Before anyone responded, Rosalie burst through the door, litteraly. Her breathing ragged and her face crazy. Ok this family is officially better the n cable! " What did you do ?" She growled towering Alice. Alice simply looked up smiling. "It....Slipped" She laughed. Rosalie's face went blank for a few secon ds . She dashed upstairs with Alice hot on her heals. I heard arguing and a lot of ripping and screaming- Alice mostly. "Dad!!" They yelled in unison , running downstairs. "Tell your mother" he went to his office. They both sat down quietly on the chair and waited for esme. Yeah Yeah Yeah Back In the Car.... Esme's POV "This not good , this is not good...!" I hummed to myself. From my pereperal vi sion I saw Edward's hand digging into the car door. "Edward, honey , sweetly" I began as sweetly as I could" I may not have brought you into this world but if y ou break this door i'll surely take you out." "Sorry..." He muttered. He moved h is hands and relaxed. We finally pulled into the familiar path to the house and Edward looked like he was about to jump out of his skin.

"Am not!" he protested. Whatever , I thought I pulled into the garage froze. Ros alie's car was torn into 2 . "OK..." I said. I walked into the room and I was Bu m rushed by Rosalie and Alice. "She broke my car!" "She ripped my clothes" "Car you drive clothes?!" "Can you wear a car?!" "OK tell from the beginning what hap pened." I said Everyone began at once. "One at a time!" Emmett began" Well we at school and Mike was feeling Bella up in the hall way and it was all Jaspers fau lt!" "Well at least I didn't climb into the ventaltion system for revenge , and managed to fall through" Jasper said. "Well I got left in the for three whole pe riods." Bella added "Well you guys didn't miss me enough" Alice pouted. "You are always there how could we miss you?" Rosalie murmured. "Funny Rose how about yo u drive your car?" She shot back. "OH go wear some clothes" Ok this was going no where! Suddenly the mood changed and all the anger was replaced with love. "Oh I love you so much" Alice said sweetly. "You too!" Rosalie giggled. "I don't car e if we thought you gay before you met Alice I still Love you Jasper!!" Emmett t hrew his hands around him. "You left Bella in the vents?" Edward said sweetly , sending daggers at Emmett, "Where's the love - the compassion?" Emmett said back up .

"Oh I'll show love and Compassion!" Edward chased Emmett right out of the house , and he strangled him with a big compassionate smile on his face. A little quick one I thought of for ya'll :} Chapter 11: Chapter 11 : Don't A/N: This is a silly dialoge I thought for you guys , while trying to write some chapters for you guys. Believe me I AM TRYING. This probably not even funny but this is proof that i'm trying. "I'm Bored" Emmett complained. "Good" I said "You know Bella the world would be a better place with out you unneeded and cruel sarcassim" "Whoa somebody is Pmsi ng. . . " "Hey what that suppose to mean?" "Don't know" "That doesn't make sense " "Don't care" "Stop that" "Don't count on it" "I'm telling" "Don't bother" "You freaking me out" "Don't fret" "I'll Alway remember this" "Don't forget" "How ca n you keep doing that"

"Don't pause" "I'm so bored" "Don't talk" Chapter 12: Chapter 12: Yo Mama! "That's Not true!" Emmett roared " I won!" "Apparently not" Jasper laughed jumpi ng around t he room in victory. "You cheated!" "No You just suck!" "...Your Momm a!" Jasper froze, And turned to him ,raising an eye- brow "My Mother How about y ou mother, who is so stupid that she reckoned a Quarterback was a refund" "Are y ou starting a duel?" Emmett asked "Apparently" "Fine! Yo mama so fat when she si t down we have to add another country to the map" Jasper shot back"Yo mama is so fat she has three shirt sizes, jumbo, humongus, and "OH MY GOD IT'S COMING TOWA RDS US!!" "Yo mama so poor I saw her kicking a can down the street and asked her what she was doing she said moving." "Yo mama so stupid she took a ruler to bed with her to see how long she slept." Emmett was silent for a moment "Yo mama so old that in the back seat of your car, kids don't say 'Are we there yet', they scream, 'Is she Dead yet!'" "Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a bathroom and nearly pissed her pants" "Yo mama is so big she tripped over wal-mart and landed on target" Jasper said"You mama so fat she stepped on an airplane and it turned into a submarine" Emmet said"Yo Mama's teeth are so yellow, cars slow down when she smiles!"

"Yo mama so ugly when she looked out the window she was arrested for 1st degree murder." Jasper said "Yo mama so stupid she put a peep hole in a glass door" Emm ett shot back. Emmett began singing loud"This is a fact, yo mama's breath Is wac k, she needs a tic, not a tac, but the whole damn pack" Jasper continued"I don't mean to be mean, but yo mama needs listerine, not a sip, not a swallow, but the whole damn bottle." Suddenly Esme walked in. And they said nervously "Hi, Mama. .." â Bella! Letâ s Go to the park!!â Emmett jumped. â Noâ I said flatly â But whyâ ¦â eâ I began â weâ ll go then you and Jasper will go off somewhere, leaving me, I end up in some cage with and animal . Then weâ ll be on the 7:00 news. Edward will find ou t then rip your head off , then Iâ ll puke when it gets reattached.â â Huhâ ¦â Emmett t about that for while. â Its either this or a barâ â Dealâ I said Immediately , we d recap of what happened the last time. Many moons agoâ ¦. â Bella Iâ m Boredâ Emmett whi â So?â â Entertain me!â He snapped his fingers â Ok, Umm , A priest and a rabbi wal barâ ¦â â Thatâ s it!â Emmett yelled â What I didnâ t even say the funny part yetâ inish you joke laterâ ¦.Were to a bar!â â Yeahâ ¦rightâ I laughed â No seriously. Thi e like an early wedding gift for ya!â I groaned â Jasper stop dolls weâ re going out!â ett called â Theyâ re not Dolls- Action figuresâ He came down stairs â Weâ re are we asked â A barâ â Wait!â Jasper said â We need to do something about her outfitâ ddenly Alice walked through the door with hands on her hips â She is Not going anyw hereâ She said, I took a breathe to relax, â Not until I get to pick out her out fitâ hhhh---hh!â I groaned out. â Takes notes Bella thatâ s what its going to song like when you and Eddie-â ¦ow Jasper!â Emmett Rubbed his head. * * * After Alice â Sex-ifiedâ me, or as she calls it , of course Emmett made a joke about THAT. She left before the others got suspicious about were she went.

â 99 bottles d now we gots orner. We got â whateverâ

of on the wall, 99 bottles on the wall take one down pass it around an Bella drunk!â Emmett sang. â Niceâ I rolled eyes Emmet pulled up at the out. â Letâ s party like its 1919!! WHOOâ Emmett ran in waving his hands. I sighed, walking * * *

The place was packed. I sat the bar while Emmett â Got his grove onâ and Jasper taped it. â Are you thirsy Bella!â Emmett asked â Good!â I was about to protest , while o g my mouth, when he dumped some liquid in my mouth. â Ahhhh, fire waterâ I choked. â So ry here try thisâ I gave me a glass of creamy liquid . It tasted good â ¦.I kept dri nk drink more and more of itâ ¦.. â Weâ ll That not my fault you like itâ Emmett said, ause I was glaring at him 20 minutes laterâ ¦. Emmettâ s POV Weâ re playing rock paper s iccors with Bella outside the club. I won. â You knowâ ¦â Bella slurred â I understand t Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock

can beat Scissors, but thereâ s no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to ma gically wrap around Rock leaving it immoooobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheet s of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attemp t to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that stuff up in two seconds. That's why when I play rock/ pape r/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me w ith their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, "O h, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you".â â Thank you for the speech â ¦now is Jasper?â â UGHâ Jasper groaned â Ainâ t no party like a Empath Party because an Emp donâ t stop! Ainâ t no party like a Empath Party because an Empath party donâ t stop! â sper called on top of the counter. â Niceâ Emmett chuckled â Shut up!â Jasper said , ing his nose bridge â This shit is bananas THIS SHIT IS BANANAA B-A-N-A-N-A-S!!!!!! !!!!!!!â â It is , It certainly is BANANASâ I laughed

â UH Jasper we should goâ I said â My Name is not â Jasperâ Anal retentive puppy fo It is Prince Blondie sparkly-feel feelâ â Thatâ s one time!â I yelled â And Iâ m p head Mc. trip a lot!â â Ok who ever you areâ I rolled my eyes. â Prince Blondie spar eel feelâ Bella saidâ Use your witch magic to make him happy like us!!!â â Yeah!!â iggled his fingers. â If you can only feel the way I feel .OHHHHHHH!!!!!â I felt All bubbly inside â Dreidel Dreidel...I made it out of clay. and when it's dry and ready, oh dreidel I shall play. OH! .â OH WAIT I'M NOT JEWISH.AHHHHH Iâ m on fire or am I ?Hmmm Why ar e you here and reading this. What ?who? Are? where am I ? what number did you ca ll ? Who is this? Goodbye !...Good thing that was just a figment of my imaginati on....or was itâ â There something wrong with toilet!â Jasper Calledâ ¦.Pissing in a t phone both â yeah well this couch is lumpy!â Bella saidâ ¦.she was sitting on a hoboâ ¦. â I smelt like that for a week !â Bella complained. â Good times Good timesâ ¦â â I o finish my joke!â â OK go Aheadâ â Ok A priest and A Rabbi walk into the barâ ¦.They d order their drinks ,payâ ¦.and leave!!!â she burst out laughing We stared with bla nk faces I leaned to Jasper and whispered â Vampirism Better give a sense of humor â

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