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LING 702 Error Analysis Project


Maria Eve Boletsis
Hunter College
Professor Anne Ediger

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Maria Eve Boletsis
December 10, 2014
Linguistics 702
Professor Anne Ediger
Error Analysis Project

I. Introduction
I recently made the decision to pursue a career in teaching. The advertising
industry had left me jaded and seeking an occupation with purpose. I had heard from the
teachers/administrators in my life that teaching was an incredibly rewarding profession.
Yet, just hearing those words undersells how deeply rewarding it really is. Mao Zedong
once said, If you want to know the taste of a pear, you must change the pear by eating it
yourselfAll genuine knowledge originates in direct experience. When anyone would
ask me why I made the switch, I would almost mechanically respond, I wanted to spend
my time doing something more rewarding. I said it, but I dont think I realized at the
time what it meant.

II. Student Bio


Nelly Santorubia is a quiet freshman at Manhattan Academy for Arts and
Language. She is 16 years old and is two credits away from being a sophomore. If she
passes all her classes this semester, she will be a sophomore mid-year. Nelly hails from
the Dominican Republic, and her L1 is Spanish -- in which she is proficient. She came to
the United States a little over a year ago. She lives with her two older sisters, who are in

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their early 20s. Her parents sent her here for a better life, while they remained in the
D.R. She was admitted into MAAL in November 2013. Through the schools in-house
assessment exam, she tested into level 3 intermediate ESL. Prior to this, she had 2-3
years of English instruction in her native country. She does not have an Individualized
Education Plan or any special needs. She is expected to take the NYSESLAT in Spring
2015, therefore scores are pending.
The teacher I was observing in my fieldwork, Ms. Starr, suggested I work with
Nelly. Nelly had an 83 average in Ms. Starrs class, but I was told, she could use some
extra help with her writing. Additionally, Ms. Starr noticed Nellys interest in school was
waning lately. She longed to be back home with her family and, as I would later discover,
with her boyfriend. Her focus and her devotion to school, was slipping.
The writing sample I examined was to be a general, personal narrative. Nelly
wrote about her boyfriends hardships in the Dominican Republic. In her writing, she
demonstrated errors I noticed are quite common amongst English Language Learners
whose L1 is Spanish. The grammatical and lexical errors below are the ones I chose to
focus on when working with Nelly.

III. Grammatical Errors


Upon first glimpse of the writing sample, what immediately caught my eye were the
run-ons. In lines 6 and 12 Nelly writes:

he left school and He was only in 7 grade, He stard fighting with his family
because he was i bad little boy

Hi almost dirent belive an my because He talt that wath his friend saied it was
true but it was not true, so that they I went to my House the neck that he call me
and sad im sorry.

In our Linguistics class we learned that a complete sentence is comprised of a subject, a


predicate and a complete thought. It was evident to me that there were multiple ideas that
Nelly was trying to get across in each sentence. I explained the breakdown of a complete
sentence and how to identify the subject and predicate. I also went over conjunctions and
how they functioned as sentence connectors. For practice, I gave her a page of sentences
where she had to determine whether each sentence was a fragment, run-on or complete
sentence. As a bonus, I asked her to underline the subject and predicate of each complete
sentence she recognized. Once she completed it, and I felt she had understood the lesson,
I had her correct the two sentences above. For example, line 6 now read:

He almost dirent belive an my. He talt that wath his friend saied it was true.
That day, I went to my house and he call me. He said im sorry because he learn it
was not true.
The second grammatical error I identified was Nellys incorrect usage of the

simple past tense. Nelly had used it correctly in some instances, and wrong in others
(lines 4,6,7,10 &12). It seemed the concept of irregular past tense was throwing her off
and confusing her in words like started which she wrote first as stared and then as
stard. She explained to me that what confused her was that a word like said, is past
tense but does not end in ed.
We went over simple past tense with verbs that ended in ed, as well as a list of
irregular verbs. For irregular verbs, I used a handout we received in Linguistics class,

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Principal Parts of Common Irregular Verbs, to illustrate some examples of irregular past
tense. I also explained that regular past tense verbs that end in voiceless sounds like ch
and k, will sound like they end in a t sound. Regular past tense verbs that end voiced
sounds ou or b or v, typically will sound like they end in d. Sibilants are regular
present tense verbs that end in t or d and require an imaginary vowel sound in
between because their endings are so similar to sound of past tense suffixes. For example
fit would be fitted in the past tense. I gave Nelly an activity where each sentence
required her to change the verb from present to past tense. She performed very well on
this, even correctly inserting the past tense of all the irregular verbs.
The final grammatical error went beyond Nellys writing sample. I had caught it
initially on my first read, but disregarded it because she only made the mistake once.
However, after having several conversations with her, and looking at other samples of her
writing, I realized this was a grammatical error she made frequently. Nelly had trouble
with subject-verb agreement when using the verb be in the past tense. In her sample
she writes Seens that day He became my boyfriend but seens that day we was faiting a
lot. She used the word was with plural terms nouns/noun phrases often.
I explained that a plural noun/noun phrase is followed by the plural form of
was, which is were. I noted that it only really occurred with was and were, but
to be safe I went over subject verb agreement with other words as well to ensure she
understood the general concept. I made sure to explain that the verbs form should reflect
the main subjects form. If the main subject was singular/plural, then the main verb
should be singular/plural. However, I pointed out, there are exceptions. We went over
non-count nouns, collective nouns the proximity principle as well as the non-intervention

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principle. I used The Grammar Book as a reference to strengthen what I was trying to
convey. (Murcia M., Freeman D.; 1999)
I knew this was a lot of information to take in but Nelly would stop me and ask
me to further explain anything she didnt understand. I appreciated that the exercise I
found for subject-verb agreement offered clues, reiterating some of the exceptions we had
discussed. I felt this was extremely effective in solidifying what she had learned and
served as an appropriate scaffold.

IV. Lexical Errors


The difference between when to use say and tell is something we explicitly
went over in Linguistics. I was happy to see the opportunity had presented itself to put
my new-found skills to use. In Line 10, Nelly writes:

his friend sed to Him that I had a boyfriend and that was i big injustice.

I asked Nelly what she felt the difference was between said and told. I asked her
when she would use either verb in a sentence. She suggested that said seems like it
was less commanding than tell. I agreed, it did feel more commanding. I explained that
said was usually followed by a direct object (a concept they were currently reviewing
in her ESL class) and that tell was usually followed by an indirect object. We went
over different ways of using each in a sentence, and then I had her decide which to use in
a set of 5 sentences.
I went over Nellys narrative several times and I kept instinctively correcting one,
minor detail. In line 2 I read:

his mom left to Francia and she left him iN Dominican Republic sins he was 8
year old.

I noticed each time I would read that sentence, I would instinctively replace mom
with mother in my head. Something about the word mom in academic writing didnt
feel right to me. I realized that though a minor error, this would be classified under
incorrect register. The word mom is more of a casual usage of the word mother. I
explained to Nelly what register was, and the different kinds of registers that she may
come across. I explained that writing a note to your friend usually called for more casual
language, where as writing an essay for your teacher required a formal verbiage. I read
her the sentence containing mom without directly pointing out which word I was
referring to. She immediately said Mother sounds better.
To further assess Nellys knowledge of register, I created an activity that provided
various register scenarios and asked her to choose the appropriate word or phrase that
best fit the register described. Example:

Asking your grandmother for a glass of water:


- Yo, can I get some water?
-Can I please have a glass of water?

I made sure to include a scenario where she had to choose whether to use mom or
mother. In this case, the register was casual, so she chose mom.
The final lexical error I chose to focus on was a word choice error in Line 10.
Nelly writes:

his friend sed to Him that I had a boyfriend and that was i big injustice.

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I generally understood what Nelly was trying to say here. In her writing sample she goes
on to say that this accusation was unfair. I had also asked her what she meant to say. She
told me that it was unfair of her boyfriend to accuse her of anything when she had never
lied to him before.
Though the word injustice doesnt quite fit the sentence grammatically, what
interested me, and what I wanted to emphasize here, was that the word didnt fit the tone
of the sentence or the sample in general. The word felt too intense or severe to describe
an argument with her boyfriend. We discussed what an injustice was, and though it
was similar to unfair how each word held a different level of sentiment. I put together
an activity where Nelly had to choose the appropriate word/phrase that fit the tone of the
sentence. Each sentences word/phrase contained two options: a more intense option and
a less intense option. Like the activity I had created for register, I made sure to include
the word injustice in one of the examples. Putting a man in jail for a crime he didnt
commit is unfair/an injustice. This time, injustice fit the tone of the sentence. Nelly
was able to identify that and explain why this was a better fit. She believed that putting a
man in jail for a crime he didnt commit was more than just unfair. The sentences tone
required a word that held stronger connotation.

V. Conclusion
For Nellys final writing task, we worked on an essay she had to write for her ESL
class. The task was to analyze a quote by Helen Keller, and to reference two texts they
had read for class and her own personal experience to support whether she agreed or

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disagreed with the statement. We discussed what she wanted to say beforehand, and then
created an outline. Beyond that, Nelly hardly asked for my help.
She had performed excellently in all the activities I had given her to assess what I
had taught her. However, I wondered if she did so because she had just learned it a few
minutes before. Her writing sample displayed several instances that contradicted this.
Her writing had certainly seen improvement from her original writing sample. The most
vast improvement, was the noticeable absence of run-ons in this writing sample. She had
made sure that each sentence in this essay comprised of ??? the required subjectpredicate-complete thought formula.
When I embarked on this academic journey, I knew it would fulfill me in a way
that my previous career didnt. I knew it, but I had not at the time felt it yet. As I watched
Nelly apply the lessons I had taught her, I found myself cheering with every correct
answer. When she would get stuck on something, I would push her to think harder. You
know this, I would say. I truly believed she did. I did not want to be a crutch for her,
and I was right. She did know it, every time. Helping her learn and improve her writing
was more rewarding than anything I had ever done before. Best of all, after her final task
she asked me Did we just write an essay? Yes I said to her, unsure of why she was
asking. Oh, Ive never written an essay before. This is my first one.

VI. Appendix

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a) Original Writing Sample


1. this story is about my boyfriend
2. his mom left to Francia and she left him iN Dominican Republic sins he was 8
3.
4.
5.
6.

year old
his life was Hard
he left school and he stared working he just was 8
Seens then He was Hart broke
he left school and He was only in 7 grade, He stard fighting with his family

because he was i bad little boy


7. 2-8-14 I sall Him for the fist time
8. I just loved his smaile it was one of my favorite day
9. Seens that day He became my boyfriend but seens that day we was faiting a lot
10. his friend sed to Him that I had a boyfriend and that was i big injustice
11. I felt soo sad seens that they
12. Hi almost dirent belive an my because He talt that wath his friend saied it was true
but it was not true, so that they I went to my House the neck that he call me and
sad im sorry.
13. but it was so infare.
b)GrammaticalActivities
SubjectVerbAgreement(http://eslbee.com/cgibin/quiztest.cgi?sv_agreement)
1:Therhythmofthepoundingwaves_____calming.(Clue:Makethesubjectandverb
agreewhenwordsintervenebetweenthem.)
is
are
2:Allofthedogsintheneighborhood_____barking.(Clue:Makethesubjectandverb
agreewhenwordsintervenebetweenthem.)
were
was
3:Ahightax,nottomentionunemployment,_____votes.(Clue:Thegrammatical
numberofthesubjectdoesnotchangewiththeadditionofexpressionsbeginningwith
suchwordsasthefollowing:accompaniedby,alongwith,aswellas,inadditionto,
including,nolessthan,nottomention,togetherwith.)
influence
influences
4:Myfriendsandmymother_____eachother.(Clue:Subjectsjoinedbyandareusually
plural.)

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like
likes
5:Theteamandtheband_____onthefield.(Clue:Subjectsjoinedbyandareusually
plural.)
was
were
6:Buildingagoodmarriageandbuildingagoodlogfire_____similarinmanyways.
(Clue:Subjectsjoinedbyandareusuallyplural.)
is
are
7:JohnorDoris_____tousregularly.(Clue:Singularsubjectsjoinedbyor,either...
or,neither...nortakeasingularverb.)
write
writes
8:EitherPattyorTom_____askedtoleadthemeeting.(Clue:Singularsubjectsjoined
byor,either...or,neither...nortakeasingularverb.)
was
were
9:NeitherCarolnorTed_____excludedfromthemeeting.(Clue:Singularsubjects
joinedbyor,either...or,neither...nortakeasingularverb.)
is
are
10:Neitherthebasketnortheapples_____expensive.(Clue:Ifonesubjectissingular
andoneisplural,theverbagreeswiththenearersubject.)
was
were
Runons,FragmentsandCompleteSentences
(http://www.education.com/reference/article/sentencesfragmentsrunonsentences/)
IdentifywhichofthefollowingisaCompleteSentence(S),Fragment(F)orRunon(R).
BONUS:Underlinethesubjectandpredicateineachcompletesentence.
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.

____HaveyoualreadyvisitedthatfamousLondonmuseum?
____Atthebeginningofthemovie.
____Let'sopenthepresents,wewanttoseewhatyouhavebeengiven.
____Lastyearwephotographedsomeoftheevents.
____Againafteralloftheapplause.
____Beforetheystartedtheirphotographybusiness.
____Pleasehandletheseexpensivevaseswithcare.
____Themenfixingtheheaterneedmoretime,theycanbillusmoreiftheyneed
todoso.
9. ____Duringthecelebrationheldattheplaza.

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10. ____Bringtheemptycartonsbackfromthefactorytheycanbeusedagain.
SimplePastTense
Slightlymodifiedfrom:(http://www.turtlediary.com/worksheets/ela/grade3/simplepast
tense/changetheverbstopasttenseform.html)
Completeeachsentencebychangingtheverbin()topasttense.
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.

He(mow)thegrass.
I(watch)televisioninthemorning.
Sam(pick)uphisjournaleveryday.
We(serve)lunchat12:30.
I(pack)mybags.
Jorge(forget)tocleanhisroom,andnowhismotherisangryathim.
IwishthatI(know)thenwhatIknownow!
Josh(ride)hisbicycleallthewayherelastnightinthepouringrain.
Julie(sing)inherchurchchoirforthreeyearsbeforesheeverdidasolo
performance.
10. Paulsmoneywas(spend)onaChristmaspresentforhisfather.

c)LexicalActivities
Register(Selfassembled)
Choosetheappropriateword/phrasetomatchtheregisterdescribed.

1. Askingyourgrandmotherforaglassofwater:
- Yo,canIgetsomewater?
- CanIpleasehaveaglassofwater?
2. Writinganotetoyourfriend:
Mymom/mothersaidIcancometoyourhouselater.
3. Inanessayforyourteacher:
- Myfriend/boyStevenwassoangry/tightwithmeforlyingtohim.
4. Inajobinterview:
- IbelieveIcanmeetallyourexpectations.
- Icandothisjob.
5. Whenyougreettheprincipalinthemorning:
Hey/HelloMs.Boletsis!Howareyoutoday/Whatsup?

Tone(Selfassembled)
Choosetheappropriateword/phrasethatfitsthetoneofthesentence.

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1. Afamilyofsixwaskilledwhentheytragically/sadlygotintoahorrific/badcar
accidentonChristmasEve.
2. Iwasscreamingoutofjoy/sohappywhenIgotanAonmytest.
3. Puttingamaninjailforacrimehedidntcommitisunfair/aninjustice.
4. Dannywasdevastated/upsetbecausehecouldntfindhisfavoritepairofsocks.
5. Nothingoutoftheordinaryhappenedtoday.Itwasjustaregular,good/amazing
day.
Sayvs.Tell(http://www.grammarbank.com/sayvstellexercises.html)
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

Awitnesssaid/toldthatthetrainhadbeentravelingfast.
Shesaid/toldourreporterthatshehadseenthecrash.
Aspokesmansaid/toldusthatalltrainshadbeencancelled.
Hesaid/toldthattherescuewouldtakeealongtime.
Joesaid/toldSuethatshewasasillyschoolgirl.

d)FinalWritingSample
Nelly Santorubia
Ms. Starr
December 8, 2014
1. Helen Keller once said although the world is full of suffering, it is
full also of the overcoming of it.
2. This means that people make bad desitions or, people go
through bad times in their life.
3. It also means that they get stronger buy wath they pass through.
4. I agree with this quote, as it holds true in life and literature.
5. In The perks of being a wallflower by Stephen Chbosky, Charlie
loses his best friend to suicide.
6. This for him is something hard but it gets better.
7. He makes new friends and starts to be happy again.
8. In eleven by Sandra Cisnero, Rachels birthday starts badly.
9. She has to were a smaly sweater, and she crys in her class.
10.
When the day is over, her family celebrates and sings her
Happy Birthday.
11.
Her day got better and all of her problem were forgaten.

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12.
13.
14.
15.
16.
17.

When I was 14 I had a boyfriend who broke my heart.


I was so sad.
Then, I met my new boyfriend and I am so happy now.
Life is full of hard times and suffering.
Life is also about getting through it and getting stronger.
You need both to learn and grow.

VII.References
1. QuickQuiz.(n.d.).RetrievedDecember10,2014,fromhttp://eslbee.com/cgi
bin/quiztest.cgi?sv_agreement
2. Changetheverbstopasttenseform.(n.d.).RetrievedDecember10,2014,from
http://www.turtlediary.com/worksheets/ela/grade3/simplepasttense/changethe
verbstopasttenseform.html
3. GrammarLesson:Sentences,Fragments,andRunOnSentences.(n.d.).Retrieved
December10,2014,fromhttp://www.education.com/reference/article/sentences
fragmentsrunonsentences/
4. SayvsTellExercisesESLGrammar.(n.d.).RetrievedDecember10,2014,
fromhttp://www.grammarbank.com/sayvstellexercises.html
5. TheLexicon:Words&TheirPartsPowerpointEdiger,A.(n.d.).TheLexicon:
Words&TheirPartsPowerpoint.RetrievedDecember10,2014,from
https://bbhosted.cuny.edu/webapps/portal/frameset.jsp?
tab_tab_group_id=_50_1&url=/webapps/blackboard/execute/launcher?
type=Course&id=_1011226_1&url=
6. CelceMurcia,M.,&LarsenFreeman,D.(1999).Thegrammarbook:An
ESL/EFLteacher'scourse(pp.6668).Rowley,Mass.:NewburyHouse.
7. MaoZedongquote.(n.d.).RetrievedDecember10,2014,from
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/m/maozedong146717.html
8. PrincipalPartsofCommonIrregularVerbsEdiger,A.(n.d.)PrincipalPartsof
CommonIrregularVerbs,RetrievedDecember10,2014

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ORIGINALWRITINGSAMPLESCAN

Error Analysis Task Rubric

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-Exemplary category should reflect sophisticated, significant, highly
effective work.
-Satisfactory category should reflect appropriate, adequate, proficient,
relevant, effective work.
-Needs Improvement category means that the work requires further
development.

Exemplary
Analysis of learners
needs is based on results
from multiple
assessments and on a
highly nuanced
understanding of various
issues of assessment
(cultural, linguistic bias,
as well as special
education needs and
accommodations), the
importance of using
standards-based
instruments to inform
instruction, and the
difference between
language proficiency and
other types of
assessment. (TESOL
Standard 4a)
Lexical vs. Grammatical:
Analysis shows a
sophisticated
understanding of the
distinction; errors are
insightfully identified as
lexical/grammatical
(TESOL Standard 1a)
Error analysis shows a
sophisticated
understanding of the
nuances of the form,
meaning, and use
(including pragmatics and
phonology) of the lexical/
grammatical items and of
language as a system
(TESOL Standard 1a)
Errors are insightfully

Satisfactory

Needs Improvement
Analysis of learners needs Little or no evidence that
is based on results from
appropriate assessments
and an adequate
understanding of various
issues of assessment
(cultural, linguistic bias, as
well as special education
needs and
accommodations), the
importance of using
standards-based
instruments to inform
instruction, and the
difference between
language proficiency and
other types of assessment.
(TESOL Standard 4a)

Lexical vs. Grammatical:

Analysis shows
appropriate
understanding of the
distinction; errors are
correctly identified as
lexical/ grammatical
(TESOL Standard 1a)
Error analysis shows an
adequate understanding
of the issues involved in
the form, meaning, and
use (including
pragmatics and
phonology) of the lexical/
grammatical items and
of language as a system
(TESOL Standard 1a)
Errors are appropriately

the candidates analysis of


learners needs is based on
appropriate assessments
and/or an understanding of
various issues of
assessment as well as
special education needs
and accommodations, or
the importance of using
standards-based
instruments to inform
instruction. Candidate fails
to distinguish between
language proficiency and
other types of assessment.
(TESOL Standard 4a)

Lexical vs. Grammatical:


Analysis shows a lack of
understanding of the
distinction and/or errors
are incorrectly identified as
lexical/ grammatical
(TESOL Standard 1a)

Error analysis shows a lack


of understanding of the
nuances of the form,
meaning, or use (including
pragmatics and
phonology) of the lexical/
grammatical items or of
language as a system
(TESOL Standard 1a)
Errors are inappropriately

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chosen for correction
based on sound
principles; explanation
provides strong support
(TESOL Standard 1a)
Explanations remedying
errors show sophisticated
under-standing of
learners needs, are wellsuited for the student, and
result in high levels of
learner acquisition of the
targeted form. (TESOL
Standard 1b)
Exercise/presentation is:
an excellent application of
current research and
practice in the field of ESL
teaching that serves as a
highly effective remedy
for this particular student;
is creative; provides good
examples; and facilitates
communicative
competence (TESOL
Standard 5a)

chosen for correction


based on reasonable
principles, and the
explanation supports it
(TESOL Standard 1a)
Explanations for
remedying errors are
appropriate for the
student and result in the
reasonable acquisition of
the targeted form (TESOL
Standard 1b)

chosen for correction; not


based on sound principles;
or explanation does not
provide adequate support
(TESOL Standard 1a)
Explanations for
remedying errors show a
lack of understanding of
the students needs and
result in little or not
acquisition of the targeted
form (TESOL Standard 1b)

Exercise/presentation is
an appropriate
application of current
research and practice in
the field of ESL teaching
that serves as an
adequate remedy for this
student is creative,
provides examples, and
facilitates communicative
competence (TESOL
Standard 5a)

Exercise/presentation is a

Exercises/examples reflect
superior knowledge of a
wide range of standardsbased materials,
resources, and
technologies, and are
chosen, adapted, and
used to effectively teach
language that will support
students content
learning. (TESOL
Standard 3a, 3b, 3c)
Follow-up writing
task/topic were excellent
methods of evaluating
students learning on the
points instructed in
feedback provided;
analysis of effectiveness
of explanation and
practice were thoroughly
and insightfully done

Exercises/examples
reflect adequate
knowledge of standardsbased materials,
resources, and
technologies and exhibit
some evidence of having
been chosen to teach
language that will
support students
content learning. (TESOL
Standard 3a, 3b, 3c)
Follow-up writing
task/topic were
appropriate methods of
evaluating students
learning on the points
instructed in feedback
provided; analysis of
effectiveness of
explanation and practice
were appropriately done

poor application of current


research and practice in
the field of ESL teaching
and serves as an
insufficient remedy for this
student. The remedy is
inappropriate for this
student, lacks creativity,
provides inappropriate
examples and/or fails to
facilitate communicative
competence (TESOL
Standard 5a)
Exercises/examples reflect
little or no knowledge of
standards-based materials,
resources, and
technologies. Little or no
evidence of
exercises/examples having
been chosen to teach
language that will support
students content learning.
(TESOL Standard 3a, 3b,
3c)
Follow-up writing
task/topic were not
appropriate for evaluating
students learning on the
points instructed in
feedback provided,
analysis of effectiveness of
explanation and practice
were inappropriately done
in some way, or final

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Write-up of the experience


shows insightful
reflection, analysis of the
experience, & social
justice implications
Quality of writing is
excellent & flowing;
consistently reflecting
accepted conventions of
organization, grammar,
mechanics, and register
Appropriate credit given
for citations; flawless
bibliography & APA format
used
The students identity is
kept confidential in strict
accordance with IRB
requirements.

Write-up of the
experience shows
adequate reflection,
analysis of the
experience, & social
justice implications ???
Quality of writing is
appropriate for academic
task; reflects common
conventions of
organization, grammar,
mechanics, and register
Generally appropriate
credit given for citations;
acceptable bibliography
& APA format used
The students identity is
kept confidential.

assessment was omitted


completely
Write-up of the experience
shows inadequate
reflection, analysis of the
experience, or social
justice implications

Quality of writing is not

always appropriate for


academic tasks; does not
reflect conventions of
organization, grammar,
mechanics, and register
Appropriate credit not
always given for citations;
some errors in
bibliography or APA format
The students identity is
either not addressed or not
kept confidential in
accordance with IRB
requirements.

Overall Grade: __60___ / 72 = B


Comments:
1. Please see my detailed comments throughout the paper.
2. Did you read over the description of the assignment and the rubric
before you wrote your paper? There were several instructions in the
assignment and in the rubric that you did not follow. If you had
followed these more carefully, your grade would have been higher.
3. Please be more careful to keep the identity of the student
confidential. If it is not her real name, I was not able to tell, but it
should have been stated explicitly.
4. Please check out APA style and how to cite outside references using
it. You will need to be able to do this for all future papers you write.