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Volume 49 - Issue 1

August 26, 2015
theeyeopener.com
@theeyeopener
Since 1967

We the frosh

PHOTOS AND ILLUSTRATION: ANNIE ARNONE, SIERRA BEIN, JAKE SCOTT

the 411 for your corner of the 416

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Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

NEWS

Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

3

Best Western hotel turns into student res
By Jake Kivanc
The Primrose Hotel — formerly
half hotel, half student housing
and part of the Best Western hotel
chain — is in the process of becoming the newest Ryerson-area
residence.
Known today as Parkside, the
student-only residence will be
completely renovated.
“We basically gutted out everything. New hallways, redone bathrooms, a brand new dining hall,
brand new mattresses, rooms that
have been completely torn up. It’s
night and day,” said Kamal Uppal,
the marketing manager for Parkside.
The student residence allows
any Toronto student accommodation.
Darya Nikitenko, a Ryerson
engineering student says she experienced a “nightmare” living
situation during her stay last term,
back in the building’s Primrose
days.
“There [were] mouldy showers,
mouldy curtains, even things like
the elevators not working properly or the ridiculous things like
the [hotel management] shifting
us around from floor to floor with
next to no warning,” she said.
Nikitenko said that due to the
transitional renovations and construction going on in the building
during the time of her stay, she
would often be woken up by loud

Sup newbies!? This is the part of
the news section where us boring
news junkies get to flex our comedic muscles (or try). Every other
week you’ll find all of the most hilarious secuirty and campus news
bites packed up nicely in this nice
little box (I know it’s rectangular)
we call Briefs & Groaners.
> Guys, there’s more burritos

Parkside has spent $25 million in renovation upgrades. Hopefully the inside looks a little better.

jackhammers and the sound of tools
slamming into walls. She also added
that she and her floormates were
abruptly asked to pick up their stuff
and move floors so that it could be
cleared for renovations, with no
help from the building’s staff.
Like official Ryerson residence
buildings, such as Pitman Hall
and ILLC, Parkside has mandatory meal plan options for its residents, with prices ranging from
$440 monthly to $2,640 semiannually.
The cheapest semi-annual rental
package starts at $5,940 and ends

at the highest price of $11,910.
Where as Pitman’s prices are as
high as $5,713.21 semi-annually
and are cheapest at $4,801.
Uppal says the building has
received $25 million in upgrades
since being acquired by Knightstone Capital Management, and
will feature amenities such as a
fully-functional gym, large social
spaces and a built-in cafeteria.
The new room options include
the standard single, double and
apartment room types generally
found in student housing buildings, with a total of 608 beds in

PHOTO: ANNIE ARNONE

the residence.
“At Ryerson, we do not have
enough residence space to meet
demand, which is why we are
adding 2,000 more Ryerson residence spaces (the first 900+ slated to be ready for 2018),” said
Ian Crookshank, Ryerson’s director of housing and residence life,
in an email.
“Parkside is an off-campus student housing building that is currently providing space for some of
our unmet demand.”
Parkside officially opens its
doors on Sept. 2.

People more important than you on campus

Andrea Bartlett
By Deni Verklan
After Unite Ryerson ran an unopposed student union for the past
four years, Ryerson Students’
Union President Andrea Bartlett
hopes to bring some change to the
organization with her Transform
Ryerson team.
The fourth-year business management student ran on a campaign that promised better communication between the student
union, student groups and students; working with the City of
Toronto to develop a campus safety plan; and implementing more
student study space during exam
periods.
According to the RSU 20142015 budget, Bartlett is paid
$28,650.

Briefs &
groaners

Janice Winton

Sheldon Levy

Ian Crookshank

As Ryerson’s vice president of
administration and finance, Janice Winton oversees the administration and finance management
group (AFMG) that focuses on
creating spaces for students and
faculty to learn and work.
With an emphasis on people,
infrastructure and finance, Winton and the AFMG have helped
with building the SLC, ensuring
sustainable food in Ryerson’s
cafeterias and student residences
and creating a safe and welcoming campus for faculty and students.
Winton is actually a Ryerson
business alumnus.
According to the 2014 Sunshine
List, Winton earned $223,434
last year with $1,076 in taxable
benefits.

Going into his third term as president and vice chancellor of Ryerson, Sheldon Levy remains mostly
concerned with putting Ryerson
on the map.
In his presidency, Levy has created spaces like the Digital Media
Zone, which is the top-ranked
university incubator in Canada
and fifth in the world.
Levy is also known for his initiative in the Student Learning
Centre (2015), Mattamy Athletic
Centre (2012) and Ryerson Image
Centre (2012).
His next move as a “city builder” is to expand on-campus student residences by 2020.
According to Ontario’s Sunshine List, Levy makes $370,475
annually plus $18,849 in taxable
benefits.

As Ryerson’s first director
of housing and residence life,
Ian Crookshank is a part of
Levy’s ambitious goal of making space for 2,000 students
to live on campus by 2020.
Crookshank will oversee the
construction of the new residence being built on top of a
parking lot near Jarvis and Dundas Street East that will house
500 students as early as September 2016. Another residence
is expected to be completed by
spring 2018 on Church Street.
Beyond being the “residence
guy,” he leads programs for mental health support.
According to the 2014 Sunshine List, Crookshank is paid
$101,703 with $238 in taxable
benefits.

A Burrito Boyz location has
opened up at the corner of Bond
and Dundas streets and that’s the
biggest thing that happened all
damn summer. Now you’ll have
your options open for a Mexican
delight around campus and another location to waste all your
OSAP money at. As an official
advocate of burritos everywhere
The Eyeopener recommends you
don’t sleep on the seafood flavours, cause that shit is on point.
So bring your boyz to the place
of burritos and get guac, you deserve it (jokez, it doesn’t cost extra at Burrito Boyz).
> Hey new guy, there’s a new Gov’t
Last year a new slate of Ryerson Students’ Union government
took over called Transform Ryerson. They are now the ones in
charge of making sure that you
are represented appropriately in
conversations with the school
administration. It is your job
to hold them accountable, read
their platforms, ask them questions and use their utilities. Make
their jobs as hard as possible, because we’ll all benefit from it. So
ask them hard questions, like,
“Would you rather eat cheese or
croutons for the rest of your life?”
> The Sisterhood of the Traveling
Eggy
The mascot has been on the move
this summer. He travelled around
the city of Toronto messing with
people’s lives and posing for photos because like all mascots, he’s
an attention-seeking masochist.
Ryerson held a contest to see who
could find him around the city,
giving out prizes to the unlucky
people that had to be around
that selfish prick. There were
also a bunch of stupid hashtags
involved because Twitter is everything and I’m having trouble
breathing underneath all of these
damn pound-signs. *Takes deepbreath.*
Seen some crazy stuff on campus?
Email news@theeyeopener.com

EDITORIAL

4

Editor-in-Chief
Sean “Boy EIC” Wetselaar

Online
Josh “Name elitist” Beneteau
Nicole “You’ve been LIED to”
Schmidt
Lee “Look at my washing machine” Richardson

News
Keith “Surly Hamiltonian”
Capstick
Farnia “Here in spirit” Fekri
Laura “Cottage” Woodward

General Manager
Liane “Salty regret” McLarty

Features
Emma “Hitchhiker” Cosgrove

Advertising Manager
Chris “Now we’re all fucked”
Roberts

Biz and Tech
Jacob “I want explosions” Dubé

Design Director
J.D. “I’ve got a guy” Mowat

Arts and Life
Al “Da bomb” Downham

Contributors
Jake “Cookie Monster” Kivanc
Deni “Bert & Ernie” Verklan
Dan “XElmoX” Darrah
Igor “Phone and cars” Mogun
Tagwa “#Shoot2Kill” Moyo

Sports
Devin “Semi colon” Jones
Communities
Dylan “Soft launch” FreemanGrist
Photo
Sierra “Some instagram shit”
Bein
Jake “Thoughtful organ donor”
Scott
Annie “Don’t let Keith bully
you” Arnone
Fun
Robert “Funtent” Mackenzie
Media
Rob “Keep it 100” Foreman

Frosh people, doing frosh things.

The best thing you can do with your frosh week, and beyond, is give a shit

Playing the part of the Annoying
Talking Coffee mug this week is the
Ram. How dare it be closed during
our production week. How dare it.
The Eyeopener is Ryerson’s largest
and only independent student newspaper. It is owned and operated by
Rye Eye Publishing Inc., a nonprofit corporation owned by the
students of Ryerson. Our offices are
on the second floor of the Student
Campus Centre. You can reach us at
416-979-5262, at theeyeopener.com
or on Twitter at @theeyeopener.

By
Sean
Wetselaar
So you’re here.
You’re at Ryerson. Whether you
chose this place for a program you
can’t find anywhere else, or for its
hip downtown campus or for Sheldon Levy’s grinning visage, you’re
here.
And while you’re here, you may
as well make yourself at home.

ALL STUDENTS MUST
OPT-OUT ONLINE
Did you opt out last year in 2014-15? No worries...
You’re automatically opted out - no need to apply every year for the refund of this fee

The Ryerson Students’ Union
(RSU) provides you extended
Health & Dental Insurance, but
if you have comparable
coverage, OPT-OUT for a refund
by October 2, 2015 @ 6pm.

NEW FALL 2015
No More Cheques!

RSU has improved the opt out refund process.
Approval of the opt out application will now
result in the plan fee being credited directly to
your student fees account in early NOVEMBER.
This means you no longer have to pick up a
manual refund cheque.

OPT-OUT ONLINE:

https://www.mystudentplan.ca/rsu

DEADLINE to OPT-OUT, OPT-IN or ADD DEPENDENTS:

FRIDAY, OCT 2, 2015 - 6pm

There are ABSOLUTELY NO EXCEPTIONS to this deadline
Need Info? Contact Member Services Office, Student Centre Lobby

FILE PHOTO

Sit, stay a while

Attention All Full-Time Students
TIME IS RUNNING OUT!

or email health@rsuonline.ca

Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

See, here’s the thing. There’s a
prevailing sense that students at
Ryerson don’t care. That students
at Ryerson are apathetic hipsters
that go to class, then go home.
I mean sure — there’s that guy
Dave who gets really wasted at
frosh and decides to paint himself blue and gold then run down
Gould Street screaming, “Go
Rams!” But besides Dave, who really cares as long as you get that
degree at the end?
It’s a stereotype that has carried
over from the bad old days when
we were called Rye High. But, I’ll
say say two things about people
who think no one on campus cares.
First, those people are wrong.
And second, fuck those people.
There’s some pretty hard evidence that people on campus do
care, deeply, about their school
and their home away from home.
Maybe it’s not in all the traditional ways that Ye Olde University
of Westminstershire might have
showed spirit, but students here
care.
Over the course of my years
here, I’ve seen too many brilliant
people create and (sorry for using
this word) innovate on campus.
I’ve seen too many people spend
the night on a couch in the SCC

(or a sleeping bag in The Eyeopener offices), and yes, even cheer for
our sports teams.
If there’s one piece of advice I
can give you, dear froshie, it’s not
to get sucked into the vacuum of
not giving a shit. No matter what
program you’re in, no matter how
lame Dave might seem, you will
have a lot more fun, learn a lot
more and meet so many amazing
people by just giving a damn.
You don’t have to join 17 clubs
and run the debate society and impress your dean. You don’t have
to throw your studies to the wind,
and although those couches in the
SCC are pretty soft, you can go
home at night.
But, no matter how small your
involvement, get involved. At the
risk of sounding a little bit like a
clichéd acceptance package, don’t
let your four years of school slip
by.
Sure, you might end up in some
unexpected places. You might
even end up parading down Gould
Street in a lion costume. But take it
from someone who’s been there —
it is so worth it.
So, noble frosh of 2015, welcome to the ride of your very
young lives.
I hope it’s wild.

hey you. yes, you.
come work for us.
The Eyeopener is always looking for fresh faces and new volunteers to
fill our pages. And, if you like doing things, then seeing those things
reproduced in print and on the web, one of those faces could be yours!
We pay in booze and food, and endless admiration from the limitless
depths of our hearts. Did we mention booze?
If you’re interested in sleepness nights — whoops sorry, I mean more
fun than a bouncy castle full of pupppies — then head on over to www.
theeyeopener.com and get in touch with us.
Or, you can find us researching how expensive a bouncy castle full of
puppies would be on the second floor of the SCC, in our offices.

NEWS

Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

5

What you missed this summer

PHOTO: SIERRA BEIN

Here’s what was going down at Ryerson while you were working, travelling or Netflixing

Sheldon Levy weighs in on Gardiner
Ryerson President Sheldon Levy got
involved in the Gardiner Expressway drama in early June, when he
joined ex-mayor David Crombie
and former Toronto chief planner
Paul Bedford, urging Mayor John
Tory to tear down the eastern part
of the Gardiner. Despite the trio’s attempts, council voted 24-21 to implement a “hybrid” option that will
see the renovation of the elevated
roadway.

Raymond Chang gets posthumous medal
Ryerson chancellor emeritus and well-known philanthropist G. Raymond Chang was officially appointed
an Officer of the Order of Canada on May 8. Chang,
who passed away at the age of 65 on July 27, 2014,
was announced as one of the recipients of this national order — second only in prestige to the Order
of Merit — just days before his death. The order has
three grades, and Chang received the second — Officer. On May 8, Chang’s wife and son accepted the
award on his behalf, making him the second person at
the ceremony to receive a posthumous medal.

Pay your tuition with
Aeroplan Miles
Spending at Metro and
the LCBO could pay off
your tuition — with an
Aeroplan Miles card.
A
program
called
Higher Ed Points converts users’ miles into
cash to pay off tuition
and other post-secondary
costs.
Higher Ed Points has a partnership with Ryerson, and as of
June 17, Ontario Student Assistance Program (OSAP) has gotten
on board too — allowing students to offset both Ryerson fees and
OSAP debt.
Increments of 35,000 Aeroplan miles transfer into a $250 payment to offset OSAP. Redeeming tuition payoff increments is like
redeeming a flight or other reward. Once the point amount has
been reached, the user inputs their credentials and selects their
possible reward.
It is not just the debt-holder that can pay off expenses — anyone can transfer their points, like your Great-Aunt Pearl or Louise, the hairdresser.
Check out the full story on www.theeyeopener.com

FREE IN-OFFICE
WHITENING WITH
X RAYS, CLEANING
& NEW PATIENT
EXAM.
STUDENT
DISCOUNTS.

Olivia Chow: Peace out girl scout
Olivia Chow has been approved for a leave of absence from Ryerson. In case you didn’t know, the
former MP was appointed a distinguished visiting
professor for the faculty of arts in February, but has
since taken a leave of absence to join the federal
campaign trail with the NDP. Chow is running to
be an MP for Spadina-Fort York Riding in the 2015
federal election.
“Contributing to one’s community is an admirable endeavour worthy of Ryerson’s support and
we wish Olivia the best with her election efforts,”
said Michael Forbes, a Ryerson spokesperson, in a
statement.

From the Toronto Police board to Ryerson
The former chair of the Toronto Police Services Board got off that chair and came to Ryerson. Alok Mukherjee has been appointed as a distinguished visiting professor for the department of criminology. Mukherjee
emigrated to Canada from India in 1971 and in 1994 began his academic career at Ryerson. Along with
working in the department of criminology, Mukherjee will support Ryerson’s office of the assistant vicepresident/vice-provost equity, diversity and inclusion.

Dr. Alex Aronov &
Dr. Roy Suarez & Associates
655 Bay Street Unit 7
(Corner of Bay & Elm - Concourse Level)

416 595 1200
bayelmdental.com

NEWS

6

Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

Rye’s sexual violence policy
By Farnia Fekri
As of June 26, Ryerson has a specific policy to deal with sexual violence.
The Board of Governors approved the policy after vice-provost Heather Lane Vetere released
a 29-page report in May. The report reviews protocols already in
place and recommends what community members should be able
to expect in response to sexual
harassment.
“I don’t see it as a done thing,”
Lane Vetere said. “I think there’s
going to be a lot of input and conversation over this next year as we
start to kind of put all of the programs and plans in place.”
Some of the programs and plans
enforced by the policy are yearround education, continuous support for victims and a formal system of complaint — all headed by
full-time staff in an office of sexual
violence education and support.
Lane Vetere was tasked with
drafting a review by provost Mohamed Lachemi in November
2014, after a Toronto Star article
highlighted a lack of specific policies in almost all post-secondary
institutions in Canada.
The problem was not an absence of procedures or support
for victims of sexual violence, but
a lack of information in the com-

munity, according to Lane Vetere.
“So I think that this whole process, stemming from this article,
has helped us all take a look at
what we do, helped us ensure that
we do what we do better, and ensure that people know where to
go,” she said.
For third-year psychology student Keisha Gobin, the previous
lack of a single sexual assault policy given the downtown location
of Ryerson’s campus was a “grave
oversight.”
But the policy is a good first step
towards safety on campus, she said,
adding that she’s “happy to hear
that they are pushing for this to be
included in [Ryerson policy].”
Several months into Lane
Vetere’s community consultations,
Ontario Premier Kathleen Wynne
announced a $41-million action
plan to combat sexual assault. The
blueprint, which addressed many
institutions including university
and college campuses, enforced
several practices such as the release of sexual assault statistics,
the periodic renewal of unique
policies with input from students,
and 24/7 support for survivors of
sexual assault.
“It kind of confirmed the direction we were already taking,” Lane
Vetere said, noting that Ryerson’s
policy will be reviewed in the Fall
of 2016, then every four years as

required by Ontario’s action plan.
By the time Wynne released her
plan, Lane Vetere had already
started conducting research, examining policies at Ryerson and
other universities, as well as meeting with dozens of small groups
and individuals to talk about sexual assault.
These consultations were the
most rewarding and challenging
part of her task.
“I really wanted people to read
the report, who had spoken to me
… and go, ‘Oh yeah, she heard
me,’” Lane Vetere said.
While Rabia Idrees, vice-president equity for the Ryerson Students’ Union (RSU), was satisfied
with the policy and the report’s inclusion of student voices, her biggest concern is publicity.
“It would just be good to see if
throughout the year it doesn’t just
disappear in the winter semester,
so that it continually is shown to
students,” Idrees said.
If the university succeeds at their
job of education and support, the
number of sexual assaults being
reported will increase and that, according to Lane Vetere, is a success.
“We know it doesn’t mean
there’s more violence happening This might be your new muchies spot.
in our community,” she said. “It
means that we’ve created a place
where people feel safe talking
about it.”

PHOTO: SIERRA BEIN

New restaurant
moves into SLC
By Dan Darrah
After a summer of vacancy, the
retail space beneath the Student
Learning Centre (SLC) has found
a tenant — the chain Thai restaurant, Basil Box.
Basil Box mirrors the style of
many restaurants in the area,
namely Urban Herbivore, by employing a “build your own box”
method — choosing from bases,
vegetables, proteins and sauces.
Many options are gluten-free,
dairy-free and vegan-friendly.
The company opened its first
store in the Square One mall in
Mississauga back in July, but
aims to make the SLC location its
flagship location.
“One of our goals [with the
SLC] was to contribute to the vibrancy and animation of Yonge
Street, we know Basil Box will
achieve this and more,” said
Janice Wilton, Ryerson’s vicepresident of administration and
finance.
But there were other tenants,
besides Basil Box, under consideration for the space.
Michael Forbes, a Ryerson
spokesperson, said that Basil
Box’s owner, Peter Chiu, influenced the selection process. Chiu

graduated from Ryerson’s Hospitality and Tourism Management
in 2008.
Forbes said the tenant’s ability
to accommodate students’ needs
was a deciding factor. “The project is meant to appeal to Millennials with healthy food options,
something that is important to
Ryerson and our community,”
Forbes said. “[Basil Box] expressed a willingness to have flexible hours during key periods in
[Ryerson’s] academic calendar
such as exam times.”
The meals at Basil Box are
served in an eco-friendly sugarcane fibre box — which has the
Ryerson Students’ Union’s (RSU)
Sustainability Committee raising
eyebrows.
“If the only environment-based
decision is to offer a fibrous container, but neglects to acknowledge all of the other options available, it will warrant action on our
part, as that kind of thing is often
meant to greenwash a company,”
Alexander Waddling, head of the
committee said.
But Waddling is “more interested to see if it’s meeting the needs
of students beyond all else.”
Basil Box is expected to open in
the winter of 2016.

Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

Year One
By Nicole Di Donato
This coming fall, I, along with
thousands of other first year students, will be starting the next
chapter of my life.
Although it has been hard to
leave high school behind, I cannot
deny that I have been looking forward to getting a fresh start at Ryerson. I have changed a lot throughout secondary school and feel as
though I have outgrown the petty
high school drama that my friends
always seem to be involved in.
This, along with the thought of
moving out on my own, making
new friends and studying something that interests me has made
me impatient waiting for the Fall
to arrive. However, now that high
school is officially over and I’m finally moving out on my own ,the
pre-university jitters are beginning to sink in.
Out of all the campuses I visited,
Ryerson instantly made me feel at
home. Despite how confident I am
in choosing Ryerson, I have been
unable to shake my fears. What
if I have no one to hang out with
during frosh week? What if I fail
all of my classes? What if I get so
stressed out that I stay curled up
in a ball in my dorm room all year
and give up on life?
I want to start university on the
right foot by finding a group of
friends who challenge and motivate me. This means learning how
to cope with the increased course
workload and responsibility. I
know I am not the only incoming
freshman who has these thoughts,
but it is easy to feel alone during
this transition from high school to
the post-secondary level.
This is the beginning of a new
phase for not only myself, but for
thousands of other teenagers. We
are all trying to figure out who we
want to be and what we want to
do for the rest of our lives. It is not
like high school where everyone is
following the latest fashion trend
or abiding by whatever rules are
set out by the popular kids. This
is a time that is all about figuring
yourself out, not those around you.

I’m from Mississauga and will
be living in Pitman Hall during my
first year. I have been fantasizing
about what my dorm room will
look like, and what it will be like
to have complete freedom to do
whatever I want, whenever I want.
Despite the many pros of moving
out for the first time, I know living alone is not going to be all glitz
and glamour. I know it is going to
be extremely difficult to leave my
friends and family behind. I will
have to take on a lot more responsibility than I am used to.
One of my main fears about
living alone is not having my dad
or brother there to help kill the
spiders or any other type of bug
that finds its way into my room.
So hopefully my floormates do
not mind giving me a hand while
I am busy hiding in a corner. Otherwise, I am going to have to muster up the courage to squash those
little buggers on my own.
We incoming first year students
also face the challenge of deciding
whether or not to continue being
in a relationship with our high
school girlfriend/boyfriend. I recently got out of a year-and-a-half
relationship with my highschool
boyfriend, for many reasons. The
main one being that we were both
unprepared to handle the extra
stress that comes along with having a long distance relationship.
Although this has been a hard
time for me, I know I made the
best decision by giving myself the
space I need to get a fresh start
in university. However, I would
be lying if I said I wasn’t a little
nervous to enter university single,
as I am so used to being in a relationship. On the other hand, having the freedom to do whatever I
want and not feel the need to hold
back from going out with my university friends is exciting.
Despite my fears, I cannot wait
to attend Ryerson and experience
what it is like to live in downtown
Toronto. During this scary, yet exciting time, I have learned that it is
important to stay true to myself and
to prepare for the many challenges
that I will face in your first year.

Nicole is a first-year journalism student who will be chronicling her
first year as a Ram. Follow her column at the www.theeyeopener.com

COMMUNITIES

7

FEATURES

8

Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

WHAT THE NEXT FOUR MONTHS WILL LOOK LIKE:

SEPTEMBER
SUNDAY

MONDAY

tuesday

WEDNESDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY

SATURDAY

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O-WEEK!

OHHH-WEEK!

Free yoga, 10 a.m. @
High Park

TIFF ends

LABOUR DAY
Last day of CNE

Rosh Hashana

O-WEEK!

FALL TERM BEGINS.
AHHHH

O-WEEK!

RSU Campus Day Fair, TIFF begins
Cabbagetown Short AC/DC at Downsview
Film & Video Festival Park

2.5 mile-wide asteroid First real Eyeopener
issue hits the stands.
to hit earth (NASA)
Hurry. They go quick.

Wizard of Ossington: Kate Beaton author
free comedy show @ talk @ Reference
The Ossington, 8.p.m. Library

Jays vs Rays
It’s Monday again??
@ Rogers Centre (last Forget your misery at
home game)
the Ram in the Rye.

O-WEEK!

September Equinox
Yom Kippur

O-WEEK!

TUITION DUE FOR FALL Junction Farmers MarTERM
ket (Every Saturday
until Oct. 31)

Queer Swing Dance Toronto Urban Roots
Class, 7:45 p.m. @ 517 Festival (TURF) Sept.
Church St.
18-20
Eid-al-Adha

O-WEEK!

A$AP Rocky and
Danny Brown @ Echo
Beach

Fall course drop/
program withdrawal
period begins
Godspeed You! Black
Emperor @ Danforth
Music Hall

30
RyePride Mix ‘n Mingle
International Coffee
Day (just a regular day 6-9 p.m. @ Thomas
Lounge (Oakham)
amirite)

november
SUNDAY

MONDAY

TUESDAY

WEDNESDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY

SATURDAY

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Daylight Saving Time
ends — turn clocks
back one hour

Hit up the new Burrito Starbucks holiday
Boyz at Dundas and drinks return today.
Bond for a fat ‘rito
Roll eyes; guiltily buy.

Host a potluck. Every- The future of MOCCA Fallout 4 release day
one wants you to host with David Liss, 7 p.m.
a potluck.
@ Toronto Ref. Library
$4 ceasars until 5 p.m. Protip:TAs mark your
at the Lakeview
papers. Be nice to
Restaurant.
them.

Call your mom.

30

Pet at least one dog
today (and every day)

Check out Pompeii:
In the Shadow of the
Volcano @ ROM

Women-only gym time: Tight on cash? The
The Peanuts Movie
Mon, Wed, Fri 9:30
RSU Good Food Room premieres. We love
a.m. - 11 a.m.
is your friend.
you, Charlie Brown.
Remembrance Day
Diwali/Deepavali

Go to class. Just this
once.

Painting+ coffee +
$2.50 rail drinks until 12
live music, 7:30 p.m. @ a.m. @ Wide Open
Paintlounge

International Students Open Mic Night at the World Philosophy Day Last day for program
withdrawal/program
Day... that’s you... nice. Ram (every Wed.)
drop (no refund)
Burger night at the
Ram. Vegans welcome.

Make sure to check
your email and RAMSS
to stay updated.

Int’l Day for the
Exams are nearing.
Call your dad.
Elimination of Violence Visit the furry therapists
against Women
of the puppy room.

World Television Day.
Go Netflix yourself.

Check out Why The
%!$# Do You Paint?
exhibit @ Gladstone

FEATURES

Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

9

important dates/EVENTS/holidays/shit
october
SUNDAY

MONDAY

TUESDAY

WEDNESDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY

saturday

1
Toronto Tech Summit,
12-6 p.m. @
YWCA Elm Centre

2
Fall course drop/
program withdrawal
period ends

3
Taylor Swift @ Rogers
Centre (Oct. 2-3)

4

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29

30

31

World Animal Day

Madonna @ ACC
Oct. 5-6

Check out the exhibits THANKSGIVING
at the Ryerson Image The Walking Dead s6
Centre Gallery today premiere
Check out the Andy
Warhol collection @
Revolver Gallery

Canadian federal
election... VOTE

Happy 134th birthday Cheap Laughs (open
mic comedy) @ PJ
Pablo Picasso.
O’Briens Irish Pub

New Talent Tuesdays
(comedy students),
7:30 p.m. @ Yuk Yuks
World Kindness Day.
Call your grandma.

Last day for OSAP
application (fall term
only)
Protip: biking is often
faster than TTC.

Toronto Maple Leafs Check out the
Steve Jobs hits the$10 pitchers at the
home opener vs Cana- Camera Atomica pho- atres, starring Michael Dog’s Bollocks (every
diens, 7 p.m. @ ACC tography show @ AGO Fassbender
Saturday)
“Midterm” means
Muharram/Islamic New Protip: save money
Paul McCartney @
nothing, they can strike Year
for beer (or tuition) by ACC
at any moment.
packing a lunch.
You might learn more Not Dead Yet (NDY)
in your tutorial than
DIY punk fest
your actual lecture. Go.

NDY

Check out Worn:
Prepare your costume. Toronto Zombie Crawl HALLOWEEN
Shaping Black Femme Now.
2015
Identity @ ROM

december
SUNDAY

MONDAY

NDY

TUESDAY

WEDNESDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY

SATURDAY

1

2

3

4

5

December! The frigid Organic Farmers
Women-only gym time: Protip: use an external Free meditation, 10:30
home stretch is before Market @ St. Stephen- Tues, Thurs 2 p.m. harddrive to avoid
a.m. @ Vajrayana Budyou!
in-the-Fields Church
3:30 p.m.
tragic meltdowns.
dhism Association

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Wash down your crip- Last day of fall classes EXAMS
pling exam stress with First day of Hanukkah
a pint at the Imperial!
EXAMS

EXAMS

EXAMS

Welcome back to your $10 Pitchers at The Bar December solstice
social life, and your
with No Name (every
bed.
Mon. and Wed.)
Fall 2015 grades avail- Celebrate your stellar Half-price fajita night
able on RAMSS
academic perforat Sneaky Dees
mance! You’re #1!

EXAMS

EXAMS

EXAMS

EXAMS

Ice skate at Nathan
Christmas Eve
Phillips Square or Lake
Devo!
The time to frantically
plan a flawless New
Year’s Eve is now.

NEW YEAR’S EVE

EXAMS
EXAMS
International Mountain
Day
EXAMS

Christmas

EXAMS

Boxing Day
Kwanzaa begins

ARTS & LIFE

10

Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

Toronto survival guide: frosh edition
By Al Downham
Here at The Eyeopener, we look
out for froshies, especially those
new to Toronto. Moving to the
6ix can be a shock when there’s no
one to tell you the city’s do’s and
don’ts. So, here’s 10 tips ensuring
you don’t act like the biggest dingus downtown.
1. Pick a side — The golden rule
among pedestrians is to pick one
side. It’ll be the first rule you break
whether it’s on the sidewalk or escalator. As a regular in the downtown core you’ll see this precious
rule broken daily by those afraid
to unlink from the buddy system.
You’ll grow increasingly infuriated by them the longer you’re
here. Your friends won’t miss you.
Make sure to leave a lane open for
fellow Torontonians.
2. Stay off Sherbourne — It’s
important to know the city you
live in. It’s why so many first
years wander aimlessly through
downtown. But more specifically,
it’s vital to know what to avoid,
including the vast area past Sherbourne between Welleslley and
Queen. In these neighbourhoods,
the north and south sides of streets
can resemble night and day. The
last thing we want is a curious
first year stumbling through Moss
Park at 11 p.m.
3. Don’t take transfers — Only
take transfers from the driver’s

hand. Seriously, we’ve seen TTC
workers on streetcars and buses
scream at children for ripping
off a transfer without the driver’s permission. We’ve always
wanted to ask why they get emotional over something so trivial,
but our fear of the driver leaves us
speechless.
4. Avoid aid workers — These
people either want your signature or cash. You’ll see their neon
vests two blocks away; they’ll see
you and your heart sinks as your
eyes meet. You’ll look away, keep
walking or put on headphones,
but these devils still greet you with
hellos and high fives. Do not be
fooled, for they have darker intentions. You may not support their
NGO, but they could fund their
cause using volunteers instead of
commission workers.
5. Keep off the bike path — Biking in the downtown core has been
a hot issue among Torontonians
for years. Cyclists are constantly
avoiding opening doors, streetcar tracks and rogue taxi drivers. The last thing they need is an
oblivious frosh using their bike
path as a pedestrian passing
lane. Avoid being heckled, and/or
throwing a cyclist over the handlebars by staying where you belong:
the sidewalk.
6. Don’t shoot street performers — If you watch or photograph
street artists and leave, I’m assum-

ing you have a death wish. You
don’t have to tip them for literally freezing in one spot for several hours, but froshies beware.
That stoic cowboy will be high
tailing after you asking for tips before he has you in a half-nelson.
Don’t fret, they’ll partially apologize when you cough up some
change.
7. Shut up about Rob Ford —
We get it. Our former mayor was
the reincarnation of Chris Farley
without the likeability. We get the
Toronto Star for free on campus,
we know all about the guy. While
the world laughed heartily at the
blatant corruption and scandal
in city hall, we wept just as hard.
When Doug Ford follows up on
his plan to become prime minister
this fiasco won’t be so funny to
Canada anymore.
8. Go out with cash — In a perfect world, taxi drivers would never unjustly deny you a ride home
because, you know, it’s illegal.
But in Toronto, taxi drivers don’t
seem to have an issue with leaving
you drunk and lost if your inquiry doesn’t fit their requirements.
Whether you only have debit, your
location is less than $10 away or
simply too far, cabs are known to
reject customers because their replies are unaccommodating. Carry
cash on a late night out to avoid
bantering with the cabbie outside
the pub.

Froshies thank The Eyeopener for giving them tips on living in the 6ix.

9. No fast food — The number of times I’ve seen newcomers
craving fast food is too goddamn
high. Wendy’s was the shit back
home because it was the only shit
offered during high school lunch
break. It’s time to move on to
cheap local eats like Ali Baba’s or
Big Slice. Froshies will thankfully discover these joints as
they grow sick of Pitman’s awful

FILE PHOTO

cafeteria food.
10. Step aside on the subway
— Unless you intend to fight a literal wave of human beings, wait
until commuters get off the subway before you enter. You may be
late, but the train isn’t moving any
faster because you slept in after a
night at the Ram’s traffic light pub
night. Don’t stand in the doorway
either. Fuck those people.

Opinion: Boyz win on-campus B.O.T.B.

By Al Downham
This summer, a battle born in
blood and salsa came to campus.
Of course, I am referring to The
Battle of the Burrito. And today, a
victor has risen.
Since Burrito Boyz — an Ontario burrito chain from Toronto
— opened its Dundas Street East
location two minutes from Chipo-

tle, the popular fast food chain,
tensions rose among Rye High
burrito lovers. In light of the only
campus news students care about,
an awkward but inevitable question has to be asked: who rolls the
best burrito?
Many fellow students may simply judge on taste, since each
joint’s prices aren’t too far off each
other ($5-10 at Burrito Boyz vs.
$10-15 at Chipotle). Some may
even admire Chipotle’s anti-GMO
[Genetically Modified Organism]
and animal friendly platform, despite the fast food industry’s high
production and international
trade disputing their claims of sustainability. The longer you look at
each chain’s menu, the clearer it is
that our answer is in the finer details, and this is where the Burrito
Boyz prevail.

The primary reason for Burrito
Boyz’s superiority is its variety.
Last time I checked, Chipotle
didn’t stick squid into their burritos. And surprise, it tastes goddamn incredible.
The multinational mexican grill
has taken pride in their simple
menu of steak, chicken, carnitas
(pork), barbacoa (beef) and sofritas (tofu) filling, but it’s ultimately
their downfall. My Boyz not only
offer steak, chicken and veggie
soy, but more adventurous options
such as sweet potato, halibut, haddock and shrimp.
The international chain has the
same issue with their lack of toppings. Chipotle offers fajita veggies — containing bell peppers
and red onion — and iceberg lettuce, a vegetable with a taste
exciting as tree bark, while Burrito

Boys offers 10 separate toppings.
As a picky eater, I’m not a fan
of a restaurant lumping two of
three vegetable options together,
whether I enjoy them or not.
Don’t tell me how to live my life,
Chipotle.
Not only are menu options at
Chipotle limited, but the uncertainty of your wrap’s size makes
its price unpayable. They already
charge $2.11 for guacamole,
Gross. They don’t do that at Burrito Boyz.
Workers hustle to complete orders in under five minutes, throwing ingredients into a tortilla. The
portions of your meal are inconsistent every time. It’s no wonder
many Chipotle customers cheat
the
system,
buying
larger
naked burritos with tortillas on
the side.

If I wanted a small meal , I’d go
to Burrito Boyz where I can get
one with a drink for less
than $10.
If you don’t have to build your
own burrito, the connoisseurs at
Burrito Boyz got your back.
They’ll weigh your meal before
wrapping, asking if you’d like
more when it’s underweight. It
may take 10 minutes, but good
things happen to those who wait.
Chipotle has exploited their
popularity built upon Buzzfeed
references and taken advantage of
burrito lovers like myself in the
name of profit. They’ve become a
long-term boyfriend that we’ve
settled for. Do not despair, for a
new boy has arrived to treat us far
better than before.
Come on people, they don’t
even take debit.

Any froshies lost? The all-seeing Eye will guide you
Visit theeyeopener.com Healthy Food: 5 Spots to eat and Avoid the Freshman 15. Talent on Campus: 10 On-campus Musical Groups you
for Advice On Campus Life (Unless you’d like to Survive on Pitman food all year?) should know and love. (Includes soundcloud Links)

Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

BIZ & TECH

11

Find Your Textbooks

Get your textbooks at the campus store, or order online.

By Jacob Dubé
The exhibit featured old experiments and props from Mythbusters, including their famous test dummy,
Buster.

PHOTO: ROB FOREMAN

Ryerson’s Own Mythbusters
Ryerson partners with the Mythbusters exhibit at the Ontario Science Centre
By Jacob Dubé
As soon as you step foot in the
bright entrance of the Ontario
Science Centre (OSC), you know
you’re going to learn something
there, whether you like it or not.
An old-style airplane is hung above
your head, and Leo DiCaprio-narrated documentary posters are everywhere. It’s no wonder that they
hosted Mythbusters: The Explosive Exhibition here, with Ryerson
as the education partner.
The new exhibit allows guests to
test out some of the experiments
done on the popular Discovery
Channel show, Mythbusters, for
themselves.
The faculties of Science and Engineering and Architectural Science have partnered to host student-run activities that encourage
hands-on scientific experimentation. The goal was to foster interest in science, technology, engineering and mathematics (STEM)
in students of all ages.
“This gave us a new audience.
We like promoting STEM education and that was our venue,”
said Nika Zolfaghari, engineering enrichment and outreach co-

ordinator at Ryerson.
On Aug. 22, Ryerson hosted a
friends and family day at the OSC,
which featured games like Pin the
Organs on the Human and an appearance by RamsBot, the basketball-shooting robot created by the
Ryerson Rams Robotics Team unveiled earlier this year.
“We love taking science to the
street. We love showing off science to everybody, to people interested in science, kids who maybe
are wondering if they want to do
science in the future. So it gives us
an opportunity to connect and to
demonstrate our science and how
cool it is,” said Imogen Coe, dean
of the faculty of science.
On Facebook, users were able
to submit their own myths and
experiments, and the science and
engineering students would release videos busting or proving
the theories.
“Anything we can do that’s kind
of fun is a very worthwhile activity and certainly this Mythbusters
[exhibit] is a lot of fun. You blow
stuff up,” said Thomas Duever,
dean of engineering and architectural science.
Elements from Mythbusters

were scattered across the OSC.
These include a dragon-headed
machine gun that fires arrows and
a giant mechanical shark that led
guests toward the exhibit.
Mythbusters: The Explosive
Exhibition begins with a room
resembling the show’s warehouse,
with junk from old projects everywhere — most notably Buster,
the show’s famous test dummy.
The first interactive experiment
is called “Tablecloth Chaos,”
which involves pulling a tablecloth out from under a full dining
set without dropping anything. It
isn’t recommended to impress a
first date.
After testing out how often
bread falls butter-side up and how
fast superheroes change in telephone booths, the highlight of the
exhibit presents itself — a twicea-day live presentation where two
enthusiastic hosts get to shoot kids
with paintball guns (with protection, of course) to test their reaction time as they try to evade the
shot. The whole project is teeming
with fun, and, as opposed to the
rest of the OSC, not a single crying
kid can be heard in the room. The
exhibit runs until Sept. 13.

It’s time for classes to start, and so
begins the rush to buy textbooks.
Your professors will make you go
out and buy a bunch of them and
readings will begin right away.
If you’re scrambling to find the
best store to pick them up, here
are some places around campus to
buy your books.
The Campus Store
Found on the corner of Gould
and Victoria Street, the campus
store is the go-to place for textbooks and school supplies.
But if you don’t want to spend
long hours waiting in line, you
have the option to order your
textbooks online from their website and have them shipped to
your door.
“We don’t have a big store, so
basically [students] do wait in
line. So this gives them the privilege of shopping from home,”
said Kelly Abraham, associate director of campus retail.
This feature allows users to

PHOTO: SIERRA BEIN

compare prices between new and
used books, and two-day shipping
prices inside Ontario are fixed at
$10.95. The prices in the campus
store are identical online. Users
select the subject and course code,
and the site shows them which
textbooks are needed for the class.
The Used Book Room
Located on the lower level of
the Student Campus Centre (SCC)
and run by the Ryerson Students’
Union, the Used Book Room sells
students’ textbooks at a discounted rate, and gives 75 per cent of
the profits back to the seller.
BMV Books
The discount bookstore west of
Ryerson on Edward St. can be a
source of cheap textbook finds, especially if you can make do with
an older edition. They can never
guarantee a book will be in stock,
so the earlier you start searching
the better.
Campus Store at the Bay Atrium
A new temporary campus store
is set to open at the Bay Atrium on
Aug. 31 for the fall semester.

Lost Number Woes

App of the Week: Transit App
Finding your student number can be hard without Internet.

By Igor Magun
If you worry about getting around
the city on time, the Transit App
is a must-have for your smartphone. In addition to the same
basic functionality seen in most
public transit apps, such as live
predictions, route schedules and
maps, this app goes a few steps
further.
A built-in trip planner can help
you choose the fastest route to
your destination, or a route with
a specified time of departure or

arrival. It pulls data from several
transit systems around Toronto,
including the TTC, GO Transit
and MiWay, Missisauga’s transit system. You can also preset a
home and work location for quick
navigation.
The app can also send service
notifications for any routes you
choose, alerting you to any delay.
And if you’re one to often miss
your bus home, the app can ring
an alarm at a chosen time before a
scheduled arrival.
If public transit isn’t an option,

PHOTO: JACOB DUBÉ

Transit App offers three alternatives. You can request an Uber By Jacob Dubé
Every program has one. They’re
straight from the app, and the trip
usually the go-to person for every
planner will estimate the cost and Your student number is a crucial single Ryerson-related problem
predict the car’s arrival time. If thing to have in your first weeks you might have. Drop in to their
you’re a member of the car-shar- at Ryerson. But if you don’t have office in your program’s building
ing service car2go, you can find an Internet connection, it makes and you’ll have your number in
and reserve an available vehicle. finding your number a little dif- no time.
And, if you’d prefer fewer wheels, ficult, especially since you need it
Visit the OneCard office
the app can display the number to log onto Ryerson’s Wifi. Here
They’re located in Jorgenson
of bicycles available at Bike Share are some offline ways to get the Hall, JOR-02. As an added bonumber that will stay with you nus, they can also help you out
Toronto stations.
The Transit App is available for for the next four years.
with any questions regarding
Ask your student affairs coor- how OneCard works. And there
free on the iOS App Store or on
dinator
Android’s Google Play Store.
will be a lot of questions.

Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

12

The Ryerson Students’ Union Presents:

F
O
K
WEE
5
1
0
2
E
M
O
C
L
WE
Tuesday, Sept. 8

FRIday, Sept. 11

Pancake Breakfast

PARADE AND
CONCERT

SCC Front, 9am-11am

Street Festival

Gould Street, 12pm-6pm
Live stage performances, outdoor shisha lounge,
Ram in the Rye BBQ, free airbrush t-shirts, henna
station and sponsor booths

Wednesday, Sept. 9
Campus Groups Day

Gould Street, 11am-4pm
Join one of hundreds of Ryerson campus groups

Paint Party

Gould Street, 5pm-7pm
Meet us along Gould Street for a paint party and bring
a change of clothes that you can get creative in!

Thursday, Sept. 10
Fit Fest

Parade start - 3:00pm
Concert on Gould Street - 6:00pm
The Parade & Concert is happening this year on
campus along Gould Street! Join us at 2:00pm on
Gould to march in our parade along with all
Faculties, Student Groups, Course Unions, Special
Interest groups and University Administration.
For the parade, cash prizes will be given out
to groups with:
; )''%239  <!#3/1 ; /4$%23(%%1
; %2343:32
; /230)1)3
; %2341./43
The parade will route along the major streets
downtown, finishing at Gould Street where the
concert will take place. Come out and see how
we’re transforming Lake Devo
into a concert venue like
Ryerson has never
seen before!

Gould Street, 10am-3pm
Fitness, health and wellness expo
Outdoor fitness classes, merchandize zone, free
food and drinks, fitness consultations, zip lining and
obstacle course
For more information contact RSU VP Student Life & Events, Harman Singh, vp.life@rsuonline.ca

www.rsuonline.ca

rsufb

ryesu

ryesu

rye.su

Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

SPORTS

13

Ryerson baseball: It’s playoffs or bust

The Rams are hoping to slide past home into the playoffs.

By Devin Jones
Their first year as a team was all
about contending with top-level
talent. Their second year centered
on stringing together wins. Now,
as head coach Ben Rich and the
Ryerson baseball team suit up for
a third year, the only goal in mind
is making the playoffs.
Heading into their last weekend of baseball for the 2014-2015
regular season, the Rams were on
a five game winning streak and
one game out of a playoff spot.
Facing a U of T team that held a
losing record of 8-10, the Rams
were blown out in both games,
ending their season early.

“When we started this program
back in 2012 and had our first
season in 2013 we knew it wasn’t
going to be an overnight thing,”
said Rich. “We knew it was going to take a number of years to
develop that winning culture, the
understanding of the game that
would translate into wins and a
playoff performance.”
The 2013 season saw the Rams
trying to find their footing in a
league filled with veteran teams
like the Western Mustangs who
went 17-10 and defeated the
Rams on three separate occasions.
Despite strong offensive potential
and pitching prowess from Caleb
King and Bryan Vardzel, a lack of

PHOTO: VIVIAN TABAR

chemistry and various defensive
errors saw the Rams limp to a
3-19 finish.
The beginning of the 2014 season saw more of the same. Strong
starts and offensive production
from the likes of shortstop Mark
Tari and first baseman Josh Lund
were negated by the Rams’ inability to play a consistent nine
innings. This led to the Rams
holding a 2-10 record at the end
of September.
It was the last game of that
month — a 12-2 win over Queens
University — that kicked off Ryerson’s five game win streak and
saw them make a push for the
playoffs. Sharper defensive play,

as well as 40 runs during the five
-game streak — nine more than
their previous 11 games combined — led to a huge momentum swing towards the end of the
season.
“There just seemed to be a time
where everything that the coaching staff had been instilling in
them sunk in,” said Rich. “They
make one play the way we teach
it or they execute [it] another
way it’s supposed to be and they
start to realize, ‘Hey if we do this
enough, good things are going to
happen for us.’”
Funding for the baseball team
also looks different than in previous seasons. During their first
two years the Rams went through
a probationary, or what Rich likes
to call a “trial” period, a process
every new program has to go
through in order to secure funding from Ryerson Athletics at a
later date. Now off probation, the
baseball team can apply to athletics for various funding needs, including an athletic trainer to help
keep the players healthy. For the
Rams to move up through the
tiered funding system within athletics, they’ll have to consistently
perform well and win games.
“They have their sport model
and then basically we came along
and said, ‘Lets start a baseball

team,’ so it had to fit within what
they had conceived of, working
around how they’ve based their
operations,” said Rich. “We’ve
been able to work with athletics
to have this team come to fruition, and to provide all these opportunities for student athletes to
succeed and flourish in the years
to come.”
For the Rams, a crucial aspect
to this season is what Rich and
the team refers to as not falling
asleep at the switch on the first
weekend of the year, or risk being
down four games in an 18-game
season. The Rams are looking
to avoid this issue by playing six
pre-season exhibition games —
more than ever before — to be
in best shape for the start of the
regular season.
As the first games draw closer, the excitement for what lays
ahead ramps up. This season is
shaping up to be something special, a coming out party for a
team that’s finally found its legs
and is ready to show the Ontario
University Athletics (OUA) and
the Ryerson community what it’s
really capable of.
The Rams kick off their season Sept. 12 with a doubleheader
against the McMaster Marauders
at Talbot park with a start time
of 12 p.m.

A fresh start

Women’s soccer looks to playoffs with new roster
By Devin Jones
As the Ryerson women’s soccer team prepares for the start of
a new season, there’s one thing
they’d like everybody to know:
this isn’t a rebuilding year.
Last season for the Rams saw a
talented mix of veterans and newcomers miss out on a playoff spot
by a single point. Needing a win
over the Laurentaian Voyageurs to
make the post-season for the second time in program history, the
Rams lost 1-0, giving the sixth and
final playoff spot to Laurentian.
With the addition of six new
players in the off-season, as well as
the departure of head coach Kevin
Souter, the Rams will be working
with a fresh roster of faces and
plan on building the team with a
focus on strong defensive play.
“Our goal is always to build on
where we are, so every year we try
to build on where we were the year
before,” said assistant coach Kristina Cook. “Primarily it’s about
coming together as a group. We
have a young group so bringing everyone together and getting some
cohesion is crucial.”

With strong performances from
the defender Sarah Slattery — who
was named a second team all-star
last year — and rookie Alex Rodkin, who lead the team in scoring
with seven goals, the Rams accomplished a 6-9-1 Ontario University
Athletics (OUA) record by the end
of last season.
By focusing on their defensive
skills first, the Rams are looking
to rectify issues that hampered
them throughout last season. With
the emphasis on ball control and
protection, the coaching staff believes a strategy of strong defence
creating a productive offense is
something that will pay off in the
long run.
“We’ve been working from defence up and the last two weeks it’s
been looking really good, it’s what
we’ve been really focusing on,”
said midfielder Nicole Pavia. “The
team is looking promising, it’s just
a matter of finding the other pieces
to help build the overall squad.”
Instead of searching for outside
help to replace Souter in the role
of head coach, this season the
Rams have decided to use the head
coach of the men’s soccer team,

The Rams will largly be playing with a new roster of players this season

Ivan Joseph, instead. Joseph is
stepping away from his role with
the men’s team and in his place
assistant coach Filip Prostran will
take over. Cook will stay in her
role as the assistant coach with
the women. According to her, the
decision was made between athletics staff and there’s no immediate
plan for a new head coach.
The women’s soccer team is
putting an emphasis on positivity
and creating a cohesive unit which
they say is vital to their long-term
success as an program.
As fresh faces and a experienced
but new coach get ready to face
a league filled with talent, excitement and a need to prove them- To read about the Ryerson Rams men’s soccer team and their
selves surrounds the team. Just quest for the playoffs, check out our season preview, online
don’t call it a rebuilding season.
at www.theeyeopener.com

PHOTO: ROBERT FOREMAN

PHOTO: ROBERT FOREMAN

FUN

Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

14

Sextuplets coming to Ryerson

FROSHWORD
(FROSH WEEK CROSSWORD)
Drop off your completed Froshword (frosh week crossword) with your
contact info to The Eyeopener office at (SCC 207) for a chance to win
a $25 Tim Hortons gift card!
“I can accept failure, everyone fails at something. But I can’t accept
not trying.”
- Michael Jordan

The Selburn Six. Pictured left to right: Lonny, Dennis, Scott, Michael, Dreyfus and Gerard.

By Robert Mackenzie
Some familiar faces will be coming
to Ryerson this fall.
Lonny, Dennis, Michael, Dreyfus, Scott and Gerard — known as
the “Selburn Six” -— were Canada’s first sextuplets when they were
born in 1996.
Initially after their birth, the
national media followed them everywhere they went. “We couldn’t
go anywhere without being photographed,” said their mother, Mary
Selburn. “Everyone knew about
the Selburn Six.”

After 19 years the media craze
has faded. This fall the Selburns
will be coming to Ryerson, joining
the aerospace engineering program
— except for Scott who will be
studying biology.
“Seeing the Selburn Six in person is a surreal experience,” said
Ryerson president Sheldon Levy.
Those identical features are
shared by all of the brothers except for Scott, who doesn’t appear to possess any of the Selburn
family’s physical genes. His slick,
black hair stands out against the
light brown crew cut of his broth-

PHOTO: SIERRA BEIN AND JAKE SCOTT

ers. In fact, to the observant, and
even unobservant, eye it would
seem that Scott isn’t related to the
Selburn family at all.
“I’ve always been able to tell
Scott apart more so than the rest of
the boys,” admitted Mary.
The Selburns will be sharing a
two-bed dorm in Pitman Hall,
while Scott will be renting out his
own place in Chinatown. According to the brothers, they hope to
become the first sextuplets in space
upon their graduation. However,
that may be an unreachable goal,
as Scott plans on becoming a vet.

Business
can be
FUN!

My first, and last,
fun page

By Robert Mackenzie
Disembarking on investment opportunities can be a tough decision. Developing a line of credit
through high-interest stocks in
overseas markets can ensure your
banking portfolio grows while divestments in mutual ventures continue to flourish. It’s always good
to keep an eye on the DOW and
the value of the loonie, in order to
maximize the earning potential of
your portfolio.
By this point most of you have
stopped reading. My name is Albert
Ronmiller. I am being held captive
in the fun office and being forced to
produce content for the fun section.
This week, the editor told me to
“write something that makes me
look smart.” He feeds me only one
deli-meat sandwich, twice per day.
(To his credit, he does switch up
the types of sandwich. This week
is hot salami and Havarti cheese.)
Please send help. I fear that I am
beginning to develop Stockholm
Syndrome, and that if I am held
for much longer I will never leave.

DOWN
ACROSS
1. Crowded concert pit.
2. Comedian Daniel ____ hosts a
3. Jewish New Year.
Comedy Central show.
6. Oh my ____!
4. Former Raptors star #4 Chris
7. ____ Spice. Married to David
____.
5. Film ogre voiced by Mike Myers. Beckham
6. Water-proof rubber boot.
8. Former Cleveland Browns kick
returner ____ Cribbs.
9. Vegetable. Butternut ____.

By Robert Mackenzie

Roy Rana has proven his basketball knowledge. Now he’s ready to prove
his potato chip savvy.

FILE PHOTO

Rana leaves Rams,
enters Lay’s contest
By Robert Mackenzie
Head coach Roy Rana will be taking a year-long sabbatical to enter
the Lay’s Do us a Flavour! contest.
“I am grateful to our team, staff
and department in understanding
and supporting my need to take
time to concentrate on my potato
chip creation,” said the Ryerson
Rams men’s basketball coach in a

press release.
Rana has yet to announce his
official entry, but inside sources
say he is deciding between a shepherd’s pie chip, a cumin flavour,
and a Ryerson-themed flavour
that he has named, “Rammin’
Rhubarb!”
Coaching duties will be turned
over to 2002 Golden Globe winner
Stanley Tucci in Rana’s absence.

Good afternoon faithful fun readers. My name is Robert Mackenzie
and I am your fun editor. I write to
you today with a heavy heart, and
a light stomach.
My heart is heavy because I
believe that I will be fired following the release of this issue of The
Eyeopener. Going into this issue
I was unaware of the daunting
workload that the fun section requires. Editor-in-Chief Sean Wetselaar has been disappointed with
my inability to produce enough
funtent (fun content) for the section. The funtent (fun content)
that I have produced is frankly
stale and in poor taste.
In addition to the funtent (fun
content) issues, I am pretty sure
that Westelaar caught me looking
at pornographic pictures on the
computers. If not that, then I am

sure that by now he has found my
stash of porn magazines, or perhaps he has seen me create pornographic doodles at the office in time
that should be spent creating more
funtent (fun content). If that’s not
enough, I believe he has overheard
some of the racy pornographic videos that I have been watching during masthead meetings.
My stomach is light because I
ate a large supper last night. As a
result I am not very hungry today
(I’m in more of a nibbling mood).
I will miss the late night I spent
in the office, the eager morning
walk to distribute the papers, and
the meal I shared with all of my
colleagues.
I’d like to thank the loyal readers of my fun section, who have
stuck with me ever since I began
my journey as fun editor. Without
you, I would have never produced
my first, and last, fun page.

Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

15

Wednesday, Aug. 26, 2015

16

FREE

WIFI

IN THE
FOOD
COURT

Need a break from your books for a quick bite or refreshment?
10 Dundas East is just around the corner to satisfy your craving.
We’re only a short walk from class, right at Yonge & Dundas.
Baskin Robbins

Milo’s Pita

Sauté Rosé

California Thai

Restaurants

Mrs. Fields Cookies
/Pretzelmaker

Starbucks

Jack Astor’s Bar & Grill

Subway

Milestones Grill & Bar

The Beer Store
Express

Shark Club

Caribbean Queen
Chipotle
Curry & Co.
DAVIDsTEA
Harvey’s

Opa! Souvlaki
Poptopia/Yoyo’s
Yogurt Café
Real Fruit
Bubble Tea

Tim Hortons
Wine Rack

Spring Sushi