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1) Universal
Law of Success
2) How to
Self-Esteem in
your children
3) It's OK to do
dumb things
4) How to stop
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the results you
want or need
5) Eye Opener
to Effective
6) How to
make love a
fulfilling and
experience in
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7) How to stop
the vicious and
tiring cycle of

Free Report Number 9:

Young Adult Dating
A young adult is someone whose physical body is mature
enough to have sex and create babies but whose
psychological maturity is still to young to handle all the
complexities and responsibilities of sex.
They are old enough to want to be independent and free to
do what they want but they are unaware of the
consequences or dont care about them. Hence the term
young adult. They are too young to understand but they
have bodies that can function at an adult level. Their
emotional maturity is quite far behind their physical
There are many reasons young people engage in sex. Here
are just a few:
Boys: Hormones raging
Permissive girls
Peer pressure to do it to
The world says it is
acceptable, even manly to do

Girls: Need to be accepted

Manipulation to get attention
Desire for love
Trying to please
Pressure from a guy
Trying to get the attention
of the opposite sex to make
up for little or no attention
from their father.

It has been said that girls (and women) give sex to get love
and men give love to get sex. This is very limiting paradigm
for either to have. In order to have a relationship that is of
the highest level, i.e. to connect at three levels at the same
time is by far the most rewarding. The three levels of this
deep kind of intimacy are: Spiritual, Emotional and
Most girls (and women) think they have the emotional part
down pat and most boys (and men) think they have the
physical part down. They are usually wrong. They only
understand a fraction these two very important aspects of
intimacy. This ignorance robs them of the ability to
experience love and closeness at the highest level possible.

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8) Is your drive
to succeed
killing your
with your wife?
9) Young adult

The following information on teenage dating is from a study

done by Terry Olsen (Brigham Young University) and Brent
Miller (University of Utah) both of whom are Family
Relations experts:
91% of those who started dating at age 12 had had sexual
intercourse by High school graduation.
56% of those who started dating at age 13 had had sexual
intercourse by High School graduation.
53% of those who started dating at age 14 had had sexual
intercourse by High School graduation.
20% of those who started dating at age 16 had had sexual
intercourse by High School graduation. This percentage
stayed the same through the age of 19.
Dating is defined as:
Pairing off even in a group setting
Being alone with anyone of opposite sex.
Having a relationship with the opposite sex.

The following question was asked of teenagers:

If you were dating someone you really cared about would
you be willing to have premarital sexual intercourse with
If they had seen 0 to 5

R rated movies 19% said yes.

If they had seen 6 to 15

R rated movies 45% said yes.

If they had seen 16 to 25

R rated movies 61% said yes.

If they had seen 25 or more R rated movies 71% said yes.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints statistics for
the same four categories were:



to 15..6%

to 25.13%

26 or more.30%
How many movies do teenagers watch a year? One a week?

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Two a week? The answer is two a week on average. That is

far in excess of the 25 or more shown in the above statistics.
Profanity.....When teenagers were asked which two profane
words they use the most it was the same two words used the
most in R rated movies. The increase of the usage of those
words were in exact correlation to how many times they
watched R rated movies. A total increase of usage of those
two words from all four categories was 650%.
If R rated movies can create this kind of lessening of moral
fortitude just imagine what the impact on the minds and
hearts of teens and young adults is if they watch in any X
rated movies.
There are some helpful hints you do to help your young
adult avoid the heartache of premarital sex.
1) Teach them correct principles from day one. Teach them
not to be deceived by the pleasures of the world. Teach then
that pleasure is not happiness. Teach then that sex is not an
option until you are married. Your parental viewpoint does
matter and, in fact, is critical.
2) Do not allow any dating until they are 16 years old. No
double dating or dating in larger groups. Going out with a
group is not the same as dating. Paring up after the group is
together is dating. Do not allow it. Start teaching this to
them as children so it does not come as a surprise when they
get to age 13.
2) When they are young, do not allow steady dating. Steady
dating is appropriate when they are thinking of marriage.
Until then it can foster illicit intimacy and limits their dating
experience, which can hinder their ability to choose the
right mate when they get older.
3) Teach boys to honor womanhood. Like the knights of old,
teach then to defend the honor and chastity of girls and
women everywhere. Teach them that a womans value as a
friend, companion and eventually wife is inestimable and
goes far beyond their bodies and sex. God blessed women
with the ability to love, lift, comfort, counsel and strengthen
a man and, very importantly, have his children. And yes sex
is a wonderful part of a relationship as well but not the
reason for a relationship.
4) Plan ahead. Help teens decide now to be chaste so
when they find themselves in a situation where it would be
possible to engage in sex they have already made the
decision to say no. Prepare and prevent is better than repair
and repent.

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5) Make sure they know that R rated movies are not

acceptable. Ever. No matter what their friends are watching
they must say no to R rated movies. Many PG-13 movies are
just as bad. If they say except for that one scene it is a
good movie then it is not a good movie any more than a cake
with just one little drop of poison makes it okay to consume.
A little poison is deadly.
6) Teach them about the addictive, desensitizing nature of
pornography and how it can ruin a mans viewpoint of
relationships between a man and a woman. It seduces and
destroys its victims. Teach them that pornography and
erotic stories and pictures of any kind are worse than
polluted food. The body has the ability to rid itself of
sickening food but the brain cannot. Once it is recorded it
will always be there. Teach them that pornography of any
kind should be shunned for the disease it is.

7) Help them be comfortable in removing themselves

from tempting situations. Let them know that you will be
glad to come and get them if they will call you. NO matter
what the hour.


8) Help them choose their friends wisely. If in the

presence of certain persons they are motivated to do good
and be good they are in the right company. But if their
friends or associates encourage immoral or unethical
behavior they are not true friends. They must leave them
and find other friends or risk becoming like those with
whom you associate.
9) Teach the girls to dress modestly. You can be stylish yet
modest. Do not allow immodest dressing. Dresses that are
too short, necklines that plunge and tight fitting clothes that
accentuate the body and draw attention to it are not modest.
They pander to the baser desires of the opposite sex.
Relationships cannot be based on the physical or broken
hearts, pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases can be
the tragic, life altering end result.
10) Teach them to stay out of bedrooms with members of
the opposite sex.
11) Teach them to stay in well-lit places.
12) Teach them to constantly refine their thoughts so that
their values are pure and applied daily. Explain the value of
doing so to them so they have a reason other than just your
saying it.
13) Dont allow any kind of music or TV shows that have
any message that premarital sex is acceptable. It isnt.

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14) Pray to God for help in resisting temptation

Is this easy? No. Is it worth it? Absolutely. Our childrens
future is at risk so we must fight for them until they are old
enough to fight the battle themselves.
May God bless you as you seek knowledge and truths that
will help you to become all that is within you to become
which is a lot. I deem it an honor to be one source of truth
to help you improve and enhance your life.
Jack M. Zufelt
support "at"
Copyright 2006 by Jack M. Zufelt. All Rights Reserved. This document
may not be copied in part or full without the express written permission
from the publisher. All violators will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of
the law.

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