Garnet Smith

Socialization of our Orientation

Socialization is the long standing process in which children and adults learn social
values, norms, and taboos. These values and norms are instilled into us at young ages
based on the culture we live and grow up in. From things as simple as shaking someone's
hand when meeting them to deeply ingrained taboos such as incest being wrong. The
detrimental process called the cycle of socialization teaches targets and agents while
sanctions are instilled. Such as homosexual acts and orientation is wrong or man without
god will go to hell. Agents are the group of people classified as being dominant while
target groups have to suffer through prejudice. Agent qualities consist of but not limited
to, males, white, middle aged, and able bodied, while females, minorities (black,
mexican,etc), young or elderly, and disabled are some the of attributes of targets. The
cycle was important to bring order and values to a uncivilized public but now only places
negative values and stereotypes in our more modern day societies. This sort of closed
mindedness leads to a limit of knowledge in our school and communities. My
socialization, through media and society has shown me that, Americas children are
taught from a young age to be discriminatory towards LGBT people, the US is close
minded towards difference, and the LGBT community struggles for rights and pride.
Gay and lesbian people would be less discriminated if youth were not taught
wrong and negative ideas of them at young ages. There is a problem that has led to the
discrimination of the LGBT community (lesbian, bisexual, gay and transgender) and that
is the fact that youth are most likely to form their opinions from a young age from their
parents and/or the media. This leads to preformed opinions that are unlikely to change,
this can manifest itself in different ways such as political stance, views on immigration,
or even things as small as what music you listen to. This, I believe is the reason why
many people are against the rights that the LGBT community deserves, because of these
preformed opinions that are given at a young age. I personally was raised in a very open
and accepting household that supported the idea of sexual orientation not really
mattering, mainly because their upbringing was so close minded they wanted to instill the
opposite into me. This has led me to be open with my metrosexuality and not be closed
about the topic develop any self loathing, whereas other households that are more against
this way of life would implant their opinions onto their children leading to self hate
which can lead to self harm or in worse cases, suicide. A passage from the book The
Health of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender People: Building a Foundation for
Better Understanding, states Adolescents are engaged in an ongoing process of sexual
development, many adolescents may be unsure of their sexual orientation, while others
have been clear about it since childhood. This ongoing process suggests that for some
adolescents, self-identification of sexual orientation and the sex of sexual partners may

change over time and may not necessarily be congruent. I think that we could change
this cycle and these closed opinions leading to a more open culture in general, not only
for people of different sexual orientations but also others that have been oppressed in
different ways. So in conclusion, I believe if children are taught acceptance from a young
age they will not have to learn it in later years and a portion of our epidemic may be
solved.
I am socialized by our oppressing culture and the closed minded people that will
judge me. Gender and sexual orientation have been accepted in many cultures, the US is
so young we have yet to rid ourselves of the closed mindedness that caused this group to
be looked down upon. Many cultures have accepted this way of life and made it
something that is not thought as strange or repulsive and just a way of life that some
choose to adopt. One example of this is in the Hijra, they are a group of transexuals in
areas in India that were banished from society for being transsexual, transgender,
crossdressers, or eunuch. In the article Hijra (South Asia) from wikipedia states In South
Asia, many Hijras live in well-defined and organized communities, led by a guru. These
communities have sustained themselves over generations by adopting young boys who
are rejected by, or flee, their family origin. Many were forced into prostitution, which
yielded low income and few outcome opportunities. Although they were banished they
were adopted back into their original society in 1997 and were given full governmental
rights in 2007. This is an example of a group that accepted the different lifestyles of
people and supported those people by adopting them into their culture and is an example
of what America should strive to be, an open accepting culture that will support those
who have not been accepted by their families and give them a place to be. I think that my
family has been like this and is very accepting of all ways of life and always accepted my
decisions. Whether I am wanting to go to a 24 hour long LAN party or if I find myself
metrosexual.
Media and the internet has broadcasted and shown me many massive displays and
examples of the struggle for gay rights and the contest for pride in the US. In the US
many try to break the cycle of socialization for the LGBT community but even now there
is an ongoing war. Gay marriage was legalized in the US on June 26th 2015 and when it
was I attended many of my close family friends gay and lesbian marriages. It seemed as
if the oppression for them was over. It seems like they won the fight but when I look at
the media, I see that many people are still against the lifestyle that many of my close
friends have accepted. With many people online calling each other things like faggot or
homo. Last week even I saw a gay couple walking in downtown of the progressive town
of durango. Many gave the couple dirty looks and some people even mumbled offensive
words. This made me quite disgusted and I felt responsible to do something for the
couple. It was then I realized how much the couple has to deal with that sort of
treatment. For most of my life I have had long hair and due to this I have been given

treatment from people mistaking me for a girl for just the disrespect and names that
people called me due to just the choice that I made about my hair. In an article from the
AFSP (American Foundation for Suicide Prevention) written by students at the Williams
Institute states Suicide attempts among trans men (46%) and trans women (42%) were
slightly higher than the full sample (41%). Basically 41% of transgender people attempt
to commit suicide. This staggering article was able to put a number amount on the
oppression of transgender people. So it may seem all the struggle for that community is
over, however there is still a large amount of people that refuse to accept it. It may seem
that they are equal to the agent group of people but the truth is that our country needs to
change its views. We are talking huge steps in a positive direction towards liberation for
the LGBT community but it will take a total shift of US consciousness before we
eliminate it completely. I am still socialized by people even though it may seem as if due
to new rights I am still oppressed.
Socialization is the long standing process in which children and adults learn social
values, norms, and taboos. My metrosexuality is seen differently because of something
that I cant change and I have been born with. But I think with knowledge this process
can be eliminated. I believe eliminating pre-found negative ideas of difference will lead
to an open and more accepting environment. If we want real change in this cycle and
learn positives ways we can better ourselves and communities, we have to learn to
understand instead of just tolerating. I await the day that people with this knowledge will
learn to accept the people and me for the whats on the inside and not for one specific
trait. I believe with this knowledge many people unsure about their orientation can find
who they are. When I did this I felt like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders and a
wealth of stress left my body. I found a deeper openness inside of me and I think that
everyone deserves the right to access who they are without social consequences. But even
with people trying to have the lgbt community put in a state where they aren't oppressed
thing like a gay couple being thrown out of a taxi for kissing "The man just turns back to
us and tells us that he doesn't give gay people rides. And he proceeds to tell us we're
going to hell for being gay," is a quote from an anonymous couple that are proof that the
fight for lgbt right is still ongoing. I was born different and was oppressed through this

cycle of socialization but in time I learned to be accepting and that helped me be the
person I am today.