What if Edward never came bac k?

continuing from when Alice came to see Bella

Bella's Pov

It's like a huge whole has been punched through my chest since Edward left. Alice is here now. She saw me jump from the cliff and came to check on me . She thought she would have found me dead . She said that Edward is gone to Texas for a while , and when I asked if he was having a good time she answered ''yes'' . So I have decided that I am going to go out with Jacob . If Edward can get on with his life then so can I . He mangled my heart , but with the help of Jacob it might be

repaired. I will be like a mirror , able to repair but still able to see the cracks. Thats exactly what it will be like . I will always love Edward but you can't always get what you wan't . Like Charlie said ' jacob is what I need ' . It's like the song ''you can't always get what you want , but you can get what you need . Want is something that will make you happy and enjoy your life . Need is another thing , need is something that is inevitable . Like food and drink. I used to think that Edward was inevitable , essential to my well

being . I am going to prove myself wrong . Alice promised that she will still come and see me . She also promised that I will see the other Cullens soon. Just not Edward . He doesn't want me anymore. Jacob on the other hand, is perfect for me . He is my ray of sunshine . It's like when he walks in to a room it's the sun shining through the clouds. I still have the whole in my chest (Ithink it will be there forever) because don't get me wrong . I still love Edward . Ok ok , I'm lying to myself . I will

never get over Edward . He can get over me , he's strong , but i can't . It's been 3 years now and I still have the nightmares and find myself thinking about him. I have to be faithful to Jacob , I know that it's wrong to be with someone when you love somone else also , but I need Jacob in my life . I can't live without him AND Edward .

This is the day that I'm going to
meet the Cullen's for the first time since they left.

I am excited . It's unfortunate that I will not get to see Edwards wonderful , outstanding beautiful face . I shouldn't even be thinking this . I have a werewolf boyfriend sitting at home . (in case I forgot to mention Edward is a vampire , and Jacob is a werewolf) Jacob knows that I still love Edward . I can't kiss Jacob without thinking of Edward . It just doesn't feel right . Jacob is really warm , Edward was really cold !. I am on my way to ' Saoirse's ' a restaurant in south Washington. The Cullen's couldn't come to

Forks because people would keep asking why they were here etc. 3 hours later .... I am now at the Cullens house . Edward doesn't know I'm here and no - one is even mentioning him , so I walk over to Emmett and ask how he is . Emmett : Bella , he is in a state . I have never seen him like this . He can't even bear to be around us . We don't even know where he is he hasn't spoken to any of us since he left Denali because Tanya said that you were a stupid , worthless human .

Bella : Alice told me that he was in Texas , I asked if he was having a good time and she said 'yes' . Anyway , it's probably just guilt that's making him act like that .
Emmett : Bella believe me , he's not acting from a guilty conscience . He loves you , he always has and always will.

Emmett's POV ''Bella I really don't think

that this is a good idea '' I stated . '' Em I believe in you , I have to have a reason to stay away from Jacob anyway , and I want to stay with all of you forever . I know Edward doens't want me but tough ''. she answered , jeez she's so stubborn . ''Son , you will be able to do it , I know you will, Bella has always wanted to be a vampire , I know I said that I would have done it , but I won't you to now .I believe that you can do it ''. Carlisle answered . Ok here goes . I pressed to lips to her neck ( hope Rose isn't too jealous LOL ) and then bit . Carlisle wanted me to do it because I have stronger teeth . He said that he cannot afford to

give more venom because he has already given 30 percent to me . When I was mauled by a bear. The blood tasted so nice , I wasn't stopping I need to stop ! Why wasn't I stopping ? . Everything was silent , everyone in shock until I heard ''Stop'' . It was a familiar voice . O my God , iT WAS Edward . ''Emmett , stop ''. With the shock of it all I stopped . MY favourite brother was over there. Before i knew what I was doing Iran over and gave him a big bear hug.

''Right , cool the jets bro , '' Edward laughed . '' Ha Ha '' I answered

BELLA'S POV The burning was ... there was no word to describe it . I opened my eyes after an unmeasurable time and saw an empty room . i looked around expecting to find everyone , but I only saw 1 person . HIM It was Edward Cullen .

He ran over to me , faster as I would have thought possible , and kissed me.

I couldn't respond . With my new vampire mind I was so mixed up that I was seeing HIM . '' Bella , I love you so much , I only left because I thought it was what was best for you ''.

Edward's POV Here she was the most

beautiful thing I have ever seen . Bella Swan . why ? why was she here ? Oh my God . Most of all why was she CHANGED.

I ran over faster than my legs could take me and kissed her . She was like ice . She didn't respond. Oh no . I forgot that Tanya was behind me . TANYA . TANYA . What if she gets the wrong idea ! . Then faster than lightning she ran . Ran I mean RAN . Her eyes flickered to Tanya . Not mine . No she didn't look at me she just ran.

BELLA'S POV It's been 1 week since I ran from him . Does he really think that I'm stupid enough to believe he loves me ? . So Tanya , I knew she would get her filthy claws into him . She always loved Edward . So obviously she thought ' Bella's gone now it's my turn '. The look on Edward's face made my heart melt though. He looked so small at that moment. Tiny, worthless , sick , guilty . So many emotions that I have never seen on his face before.
I have to keep reminding myself that he doesn't love me. why would he ? when he can have Tanya right there. She is beautiful beyond words and

I'm just plain old Bella nothing special. Jacob always called me natural. Because I wouldn't wear make - up and outstanding clothes . I'm not natural I'm PLAIN .

2 dayS later Alice's Pov Bella is still gone . SHE didn't even wait to hear the whole story................ Well Edward and Tanya are a couple , and I told Edward that she was engagd to Jacob Black so I suppose they do have a point. Yes I know what your all thinking OMG. Edward is dating Tanya because he knows what it's like to have a broken heart. She loves

him like Bella did , so he thought that if he can't be happy he may as well make someone else happy . He was extremely jwalous when I told him that Jacob Black asked Bella to marry him (I lied) as it was his dream to marry her . He always wanted her to be his wife . '' Alice '' shouted Edward . '' What Edward to need to shout '' I shouted back .

Edward's Pov '' Alice this is not funny ,why is Bella Swan here . I am Tanya's boyfriend and then the woman I love turns up '' I fumed . I was so angry with Alice. I couldn't be with Bella (not that she'd want me ) anyway because I was with

Tanya . But we could have been friends. I loved her company more than anyone else's . I find that I can relate to her . We have connection that is supernatural . ' 'Edward I know what your thinking but your dating Tanya so you and Bella can still be friends but it's just not gonna work out being a couple '' I was so angry that I ran out of the room . Alice lied to me. She told me that Bella was engaged to Jacob . She really only wanted me to go out with Tanya . Sure Tanya was her friend , but I thought she would have rathered me be with Bella . She told me earlier that '' it was too complacated her brother and her best friend going out ''. How ? why ? . She never had a problem with it before . She was always delighted . So excited .

What am I going to do ? I love Bella . I really like Tanya . I'm not that kinda guy though. I can't jsut break up with Tanya when she was really there for me when I didn't have Bella . Now I will be here for her .! I am going to have a talk with Bella tomorrow . Alice saw a vision of her coming back , so hopefully it will go well . I'm just going to say '' Bella , we were never meant to be together . I did love you but now I'm with Tanya ''. I know it sucks doesn't it ! Bad . I want to be with Bella . Believe me I do , but its just too complicated now . It's a love triangle . Now it's me , Tanya and her. Well everyone knows that love spelt backwards is evol . So basically ''evil ''.

Bella's pov . I am going back tomorrow to see Alice and the rest of the Cullens. it's going to be so hard to see Tanya with Edward . Holding his hand , when I know that all I want is to be able to do that. He will never love me . Sure I was great when he had me : human girl , vunerable , friend for sister . Something to keep him occupied . Exactly I was treated just like a pastime . You go to dance classes for a while , get sick of them , move on . I am finally starting to realise that he doesn't deserve me . YES i HAVE FALLEN OUT OF LOVE WITH EDWARD CULLEN .

*************************************** *************************************** ********************************** Later that day . I ma just about to come in through the Cullen's front door . I wan't supposed to coem back till tomorrow but , what the heck . I miss Alice and Emmett . I am blocking Edward out of my mind . I am convincing myself that he didn't deserve me . '' Alice , Em , miss me '' I called . Did I mention that I hunted yesterday and barely even got a speck on my clothes. I love being a vampire . I am staying away from human obviously , but I think I'm in control of myself . Well who am I to judge . '' Bella , babe your back '' Screamed Emmett . '' Jeez Em I'm a vampire

now , no need to scream '' I teased . '' Ha good one Bells '', shouted Alice as she ran and nearly knocked me over. '' Oh Bella , I never noticed how absolutely frickin' awesome you look as a vampire '' laughed Jasper . I have never seen this side of him . It was always , plain Jasper . I don't recall us ever having a conversation . And then my horrid 18 th birthday aswell . '' Ha ha Jazz , now you talk to me '' I stated the obvious . '' Well i don't wanna kill you all the time now so , hey why not ?'', he answered with the biggest smile I have ever seen on his face. '' That's good to know '' I laughed , now I understood how tempation feels . '' Hello Bella '' murmured Rose . '' Bella will you take a walk with me

please ?'' she asked

Rosalie's Pov '' Bella will you cme take a walk with me '' I asked. ''sure'' she answered with a strange look on her face. She's probably wondering what the hell I would have to say to her , I don't want to go against Alice , but I know what it's like to be betrayed and Alice is betraying Bella. She is manipulating Edward . Feeding him all this crap that Bella doesn't love him , she is

engaged to Jacob , Tanya is a million times better . He is believing her like he knew it all along. I want Bella to leave for a few days with me . I told Emmett and he agreed. He is against Edward a lot lately , everything Edward says he has some smart answer for. He is annoyed with Edward because he will possibly lose his sister . He didn't think Bella was going to come back . When she saw who was standing beside Edward she just broke down and ran . I know I haven't been nice to her in the past but that was truly jealousy . Now that she doesn't have what I want I am going to help her . I hate Tanya with all my heart , so now that Bella is a vampire I would love to go and lock Edward up. I thought of all

this in less than a fraction of a second . '' What is it Rosalie '' She asked when we were halfway to my destination . '' Bella '' I began . '' Bella , I know that you have no reason to truat me , I have been nothing but mean to you for the first second I saw you . I am sorry , and I know that it will be hard for you to forigve me .

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