DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. The amazing Stephanie Meyer does.

Bella’s p.o.v. I knew what I had to do. I had been thinking about this plan for days but had never found the right moment to do it. My rusty old truck was groaning down the highway towards the Cullen house. Tonight was going to be fun.
Right now he's probably slow dancing with a bleach blond tramp, and she's probably getting frisky... right now, he's probably buying her some fruity little drink cause she can't shoot whiskey... Right now, he's probably up behind her with a pool-stick, showing her how to shoot a combo... And he don't know...

He was probably cheating right now. I do remember him speaking about a Tanya girl. My memory does recall she was blonde. Damn blondes, they always get the best pick.
That I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped up 4 wheel drive, carved my name into his leather seats... I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights, slashed a hole in all 4 tires... Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats.

There it was. The old Victorian mansion I had once dared to call home. I killed the engine and got out of the car with the things I would need. The pass code to open up the garage on the outside was still the same. Stupid vampires.
Right now, she's probably up singing some white-trash version of Shania karaoke.. Right now, she's probably saying "I'm drunk" and he's a thinking that he's gonna get lucky, Right now, he's probably dabbing on 3 dollars worth of that bathroom polo... And he don't know...

But when the garage door soundlessly shifted up, a small figure was sitting on top of the Volvo. In this case, the thing the figure was sitting on was my target. Alice. She wasn’t surprised to see me, more excited? “Alice,” I acknowledged. “Hello Bella,” She smiled. “Why are you here?” “I thought I would help you.” “You want to help me destroy your brother’s car?” “After what he did to you, he is no longer my brother,” Her gold eyes darkened to pitch black and her voice dropped dangerously. “Well then Alice,” I smirked evilly “Let’s get to it.”

That I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped up 4 wheel drive, carved my name into his leather seats, I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights, slashed a hole in all 4 tires... Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats. I might've saved a little trouble for the next girl, Cause the next time that he cheats... Oh, you know it won't be on me!

I beat his car to a pulp with the help of Alice and my metal base ball bat. His car tires were slashed and my name along with Alice’s was etched into every leather surface on the inside with my car key. He thinks he can get away with breaking my heart into itty bitty pieces? Oh no. Alice and I sat on the hood of Rosalie’s BMW. Should I leave a little present for the bitch too? Na…. I’ve done enough. We admired our work and sat in silence. “Well, that was fun,” She finally said. We erupted into giggles and leaned on each other. We sighed. “Alice, why did you leave?” I asked after another moment of silence. Alice placed her arms gently around me. “Edward forced me too,” She said as if it were a good enough explanation. “So you didn’t want to go?”

“No, you’re my sister,” She kissed my head. “Then why didn’t you stay? He doesn’t own you.” “He figured it would be best for all of us to leave.” “Considering what has happened it wasn’t such a good idea huh?” “Women are always the smartest in all situations.” “Totally,” I agreed. “But Alice, would you might have your camera phone on you?” She reached one arm back into the pocket of her black designer jeans and pulled it out. “I thought we might need this,” Alice handed it to me and I pressed play. A red button flashed to signal that it was recording. “And here we are in the Cullen garage, recording a monumental event in history!” I announced in my spokes person voice. Alice danced around the annihilated car, showing off some of the beautiful wounds and gashes. “Ahh, and here is my favorite mark,” Alice opened up the driver door to reveal a broken heart engraved into the grey leather with the words BELLA and ALICE in capital letters. I gave the camera to Alice and I began to talk into the camera lens. “Hello to all watching, good to see you again! Don’t you all love what we did to the Volvo? I personally do,” I paraded around the decimated vehicle elatedly.

“This is probably the most fun I’ve had in months…..or years. No better way to get out anger, hurt, sadness, love,” I accented the last word obscenely. “I second that!” Alice nodded from behind the camera. I got to a very close up shot of my face and tilted it downward so the screen could really capture the dark rings under my eyes from lack of sleep. Even Alice gasped. “Hello Edward,” I breathed “I hope your life is going well because,” I patted the Volvo soundly “you just lost a precious item. Do they make insurance for your ex-girlfriend beating up your car?” I asked Alice. “I don’t think so, but they should,” She shrugged. “ I need to get going. Bed time for the human as you often reminded me.I love you, bye,” I grinned and Alice pressed stop. After that night, I knew my life was going to be hellish.
No...not on me 'Cause I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped up 4 wheel drive, carved my name into his leather seats... I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights, slashed a hole in all 4 tires... Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats. Oh.. Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats... Ohh... before he cheats...

I had thought of this story a while ago and decided it was time to post it because I haven’t been posting anything lately. My Boyfriend’s a WHAT? is coming along slowly because I’m on a tiny writer’s block. I’ll get back though! Luv u!

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