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Conference for Pastors

How did I arrive at that

dark place where I actually
wanted to kill myself?
This had been building
up for a few years.

The shift from locating my

identity in the message of
the Gospel to locating my
identity in my success as a
messenger of the Gospel
was slow and subtle.

I painfully learned that the

more you anchor your
identity and sense of worth
in something or someone
smaller than God, the more
pain you will experience
when you lose it all.


20 as it is my eager expectation and

hope that I will not be at all ashamed,
but that with full courage now as always
Christ will be honored in my body,
whether by life or by death. 21 For to
me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.
22 If I am to live in the flesh, that means
fruitful labor for me. Yet which I shall
choose I cannot tell. 23 I am hard
pressed between the two. My desire is
to depart and be with Christ, for that
is far better.





1. What are signs in your own life that show your

identity is anchored to your ministry or

calling? Share one or two things, if you are
2. What are the ways that your relationship with
your wife and family are suffering because of
ministry? What is the Lord showing you about
your heart right now?
3. What do you need to start teaching and
admitting to your church congregation about
the reality of pastoral ministry that they need
to know so they can help in pastoring
you as their pastor?

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