• •

Only ifthere
wasa Cosmo
quiz to figure
out this one!
UIZZI 9 'In' the NewYear!
Here is aquiz to end all quizzes: At the start of 2008,
find out just how your year is going to turn OUt. ..
By Prashant Rajkhowa
• \Vhy do women need to use quizzes to
find out things they already know? Whv
do you need a quiz to knolV if you put
family before career? Look at yourse\f­
are you "middle-aged" with more tyres
round the midclle than zeroes in your hank
balance? Yes, you definitely put family
before career. Why do you need a quiz to
tell you whether you would make a good
mother? Talk to your mother, if you find
that you agree with her far more than you
did when you were 16 years oleL the
answer is simple: Forget good mother or
bael you would be your mother.
Quizzes are supposed to tell you things
about life, work relationships, and men
that you didn't know. Quizzes are supposed
to analvse vour inner abilities based on
/ ,
supremelv unrelated questions. Take the
following quiz at your own risk!
oIf you remember New Year's
Eve, did you:
a. Gaze into his eyes as the fireworks
went off on the stroke of midnight.
b. Gaze into his eyes and proceed to
regurgitate the last 15 drinks you
consumed qUickly because the idea of
being sober on the first minute of the
new year was something that scared
you since Janumy 1, 2007.
c. Sit home with a tub ofTiramisu ice
cream and watch The Breakup one
more time before 2007 went by.
The first New Year's
resolution that you plan to
break is:
a. Stop pinching the store clerk's rear in
order to get an additional 5% discount.
b. Stop screeching to a halt every time
you see a sign that says "End of Season
Sale" and proceed to spend what's left of
your salary bonus.
c. Start on Karua Chal/th so that
he can have a long life-especially sinct'
he is grossly overweight, beer for
breakfast, and has cholesterol levels that
are higher than his length and delively
time combined.
e If you were to choose one
superpower, it would be:
a. The ability to leap tall buildings in
a single bound and obliterate slums
without breaking a sweat or smudging
your makeup.
b. The ability to manage your finances,
cook three meals in under 45 minutes,
and have at least one girl's night out
without resorting to prescribed uppers.
c. The ability to give up everything you
hold dear. including your dreams and
hope-. in order to be there for him, his
famih and keep having children till
through English programmes.
G) This year, if you were to stop
nagging him about one
"annoying" habit, it would be:
a. His scratching himself and
stroking your hair without washing his
hands first.
b. His sharing your bottle ofVeet and
not cleaning the cap after he's done.
c. His fLU1tasy of pictuling your mother
when he is in bed with vou.
I If you were to go and buy
yourself a bag tomorrow,
would it:
a. Be' large-Sized enough to carry
supplies for the neAt one week so
that ifyou choose to walk out, you won't
feel bereft.
b. Be meclium-sized, big enough to fit
your cellphone, calculator, s t a p i e l ~
wallet, train pass, and other office
supplies because you don't have a life
outside of work.
c. Be small-sized, enough to cany your
toothbrush, toothpaste, breath mints,
and a lipstick.
(DAccording to you, the best
song of 2007 was:
a. Gimme iv/ore by Britney Spears
b. Love is Gone by David Guetta
c. AJJ of Hi mesh's tracks.
You took this quiz while:
a. Running 011 the tread mill because
you are detennined to lose those last 10
lbs by December 31st, 2008.
b. Sitting in front of your PC monitor,
prepaling your depaliment's annual
budget for the coming financial year.
c. Preparing lcadhai aloo mutter
because he doesn't like leftovers.
Mostly a's
You need to be locked up, you crazy
woman. You're the kind of woman that
guys queue up for with their wallets
hanging out. You're quirky and ooze
confidence and it doesn't matter that you
are Fair & Lovelv's most wUlIed customer.
Twentv four hours aren't enough for you
to do evervthingyou want to do. The year
2008 will either be jam-packed with you
doing evelything under the sun or you will
end up in a honible' relationship where he
cheats on vou before you can call it off.
Mostly B's
You probably lied through most of these
qllestionsjust like you do everyday ofyour
life. Pick a side. Stop sitting on the fence.
You have opinions but are too worried
about what otberpeople will think to blurt
it out. And no, just becauseyou are sleeping
with him, it does not mean he is your
boyfriend. Hes lying about his hiends being
too bus:' lately. He's not Simply being sweet
hI' offeling to take your friends shopping
or dlive your sister for medical checkups.
Ifyou don't want 2008 to be your Year of
the Doonnat, you need to act now.
Mostly C's
It's goi ng to be .i ust another year
entrenched in 18tb century Indian
culture for VOl!. Your ideas are prehistolic
and your notions about men and
relationships can best be described as
.r urassic. Chances are you wished you
could have picked the other options but
then you would be lving to yourself. You
need a selious makeover. You need a new ~
life. Your need a po\ver role lTIode1. You ~
need to subscribe to Cosmopolitan. • ~
you have' at least three boys.
· Of the 100 things you should
do before you die, this year you
would want to:
a. Bungee jump, sky clive, scuba clive,
and get married in Vegas-in that order.
b. Take a tlip to one of the
IvIeditemmean islands and fall in love
with a bronze-skinned, long blonde­
haired, muscular God who sweeps you
off your feet and takes you to a place
that you thought only existed in dreams
,md then come' home and screw your
own man for all he's got during the'
divorce proceedings.
c. Take all your gaudy, never-worn­
since-the-wedcling jewellery out of the
locker, sell it and go on a shopping spree
to Hong Kong.
0For your first make-over of
the year, if money was no
object and miracles existed,
would you want to turn into:
a. Storm (Halle Beny) from X-iV/en.
b. Mystique' (Rebecca Romijn)
from X-iV/en.
c. Smliti Irani.
· At a party, you believe other
women see you as:
a. A major "lock up your
husbands/boyfriends" SOli of threat.
b. The fun, easy-going, everyone's
friend type who's always up for
a good time.
c. Fat
OAt a party, you believe other
men see you as:
a. Genre and generation-bre,lking
c. Fat and sagging
· In your opinion, a slut is:
a. The best vvay you would describe all
your girlfriends when they aren't
b. Someone you used to be until you
found him.
C. Something you have heard about

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