Zindagi... Cigarette ki tarah hoti hai, Enjoy karo... Warna...

Sulag to rahi hi hai, khatam to waise bhi ho hi jayegi. Gud Day! ************** Khwaish aisi karo ki aasman tak ja sako, Dua aisi karo ki khuda ko pa sako, U to jeene k liye pal bahut kam hai, Jiyo aise k har pal mein zindgi pa sako..! ************* Jahan ki gurbat me sukun nahi ayega, Gam-e-tohin se kubul nahi ayega. Maklul ki fitrat he ye kafir, Dimag fat jayega par ye sher samajh nahi ayega. ****************** Wo yaron ki mehfil wo muskrate pal, Dilse juda hai apna bita hua kal Kabhi guzarti thi zindgi waqt bitane me, Ab waqt guzar jata hai chand kagaz k note kamane me. ************ Apne gamo ki yu numaish na kar, Apne nasib ki yu aazmaish na kar, Jo tera hai tere dar pe khud ayega, Roz roz use pane ki khwaish na kar! ****************** Har khomoshi mein ek baat hoti hai, Har dil mein ek yaad hoti hai, Aapko pata ho ya na ho par aapki khushi k liye roz fariyad hoti hai. **************** Dosti ki mahek ishq se kam nahi hoti, Ishq pe hi zindgi khatm nahi hoti, Agar sath ho zindgi men achche dosto ka, Zindagi kisi jannat se kam nahi hoti. ************** Zindagi Mein Kuch Lamhein Khaas Ban Gaye, Mile To Mulakat Ban Gaye, Bichhre To Yaad Ban Gaye, Aur Jo Dil Se Na Gaye,Wo AAP Ban Gaye. ************ Rabb kare sade yaar muskraunde rehen, Sohnia nu tarpaunde rehen, Yara nal mehfila v launde rehan, Kuri na fase koi gal ni, customer care nal kam chalaunde rehan. *********** Ishq ke sahare jiya nahi karte, Gum ke pyalo ko piya nahi karte, Kuchh Nawab dost hain hamare, jinko Pareshan na karo to wo yaad hi kiya nahi karte... ************** * 4 worms were placed into 4 separate jars. The first worm was put into a jar of alcohol. The second worm was put into a jar of cigarette smoke. The third worm was put into a jar of sperm. The last worm was put into a jar of soil. after 24 Hours: First worm.... Dead Second worm... Dead Third worm.... Dead Fourth worm... Alive > What can we learn from this??? As long as you drink, smoke, and screw,... you won't get worms! *********** >This is just too funny not to share. Excerpted from an article which >appeared in the >Dublin Times about a bank robbery on March 2,1999: Once inside the bank

>shortly after >midnight, their efforts at disabling the internal security system got >underway immediately. >The robbers, who expected to find one or two large safes filled with cash >and valuables, >were surprised to see hundreds of smaller safes scattered throughout the >bank. >The robbers cracked the first safe's combination, and inside they found only >a bowl >of vanilla pudding. As recorded on the bank's audiotape system, one robber >said, >"At least we'll have a bit to eat." The robbers opened up a second safe, and >it also >contained nothing but vanilla pudding. The process continued until all the >safes were opened. They found not one pound sterling, a diamond, or an ounce >of gold. Instead, all the safes contained covered bowls of pudding. >Disappointed, the robbers made a quiet exit, each >leaving with nothing more than a queasy, uncomfortably full stomach. >The newspaper headline read: >IRELAND'S LARGEST SPERM BANK ROBBED EARLY THIS MORNING. *************** H.O.L.L.A.N.D. - Hope Our Love Lasts And Never dies. I.T.A.L.Y. - I Trust And Love You. L.I.B.Y.A. - Love Is Beautiful; You Also. F.R.A.N.C.E. - Friendships Remain And Never Can End. C.H.I.N.A. - Come Here.. I Need Affection. B.U.R.M.A. - Between Us, Remember Me Always. N.E.P.A.L. - Never Ever Part As Lovers. K.E.N.Y.A. - Keep Everything Nice, Yet Arousing. C.A.N.A.D.A. - Cute And Naughty Action that Developed into Attraction K.O.R.E.A. - Keep Optimistic Regardless of Ever Adversity. E.G.Y.P.T. - Everything's Great, You Pretty Thing! M.A.N.I.L.A. - May All Nights Inspire Love Always. P.E.R.U. - Phorget Everyone... Remember Us. U.S.A. - Ur Soul Affects.... I.N.D.I.A. - I Nearly Died In Adoration. ************* He said. I don t know why you wear a bra; you ve got nothing to put in it. She said. You wear briefs, don t you? She said. What do you mean by coming home half drunk? He said. It s not my fault. I ran out of money. he said. Since I first laid eyes on you, I ve wanted to make love to you in the worst way. She said. Well, you succeeded. He said. Two inches more, and I would be king She said. Two inches less, and you d be queen On wall in ladies room: My husband follows me everywhere. Written just below it: I do not. he said. Shall we try a different position tonight? She said. That s a good idea.. you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart. Priest. I don t think you will ever find another man like your late husband. She said. Who s gonna look? He said. What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you? She said: Turn sideways and look in the mirror.

He said. Let s go out and have some fun tonight. She said. Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on. And the number 1 He said. She said .. He said. Why don t you tell me when you have an orgasm? She said. I would, but you re never there.

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