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C O M P L I M E N TA RY

MARCH 2017, VOL. 15 ISSUE 3

SEE PAGE 24

Publisher / Editor Mike Strong Sales Manager Dottie Godberry Staff Photographer Jimmy Dunkley

Contributing Writers Bill Delaune Linda Melancon Calvin Bessonett

Bully

Goosie Guice Orhan McMillan Mireworks Kellie Seymour Tanya Stilley Jimmy Dunkley

For Advertising Information Please call:

225-622-1324

E-Mail Comments to Stronggraphics1@cox.net www.ascensionmagazine.net

Note: Features in this publication labeled “advertorial” are paid for editorials. All Rights Reserved. Opinions expressed are not necessarily those of the publisher, editor or staff of Ascension Magazine

of the publisher, editor or staff of Ascension Magazine 18386 Little Prairie Rd. Prairieville, LA 70769

18386 Little Prairie Rd. Prairieville, LA 70769

Magazine 18386 Little Prairie Rd. Prairieville, LA 70769 Table of Contents SPECIAL OLYMPICS 4 GONZALES GARDEN

Table of Contents

SPECIAL OLYMPICS

4

GONZALES GARDEN CLUB

10

SWEET EYES W/ TANYA

12

CRAWFISH FESTIVAL

24

JAMMIN’ WITH GOOSIE

29

BILL DELAUNE

30

THOUGHTS FROM BULLY

34

CHURCH POINT

36

SNO’S RECIPE

45

FOR MORE INFORMATION 225.622.3262 www.riverparishfoods.com
FOR MORE INFORMATION
225.622.3262
www.riverparishfoods.com
BULLY 34 CHURCH POINT 36 SNO’S RECIPE 45 FOR MORE INFORMATION 225.622.3262 www.riverparishfoods.com
ASCENSION PARISH SHERIFF’S DEPARTMENT AND DUTCHTOWN HIGH SCHOOL HOST SPECIAL OLYMPICS LOUISIANA This past month
ASCENSION PARISH SHERIFF’S DEPARTMENT AND DUTCHTOWN HIGH SCHOOL HOST SPECIAL OLYMPICS LOUISIANA This past month

ASCENSION PARISH SHERIFF’S DEPARTMENT AND DUTCHTOWN HIGH SCHOOL HOST SPECIAL OLYMPICS LOUISIANA

AND DUTCHTOWN HIGH SCHOOL HOST SPECIAL OLYMPICS LOUISIANA This past month I had the pleasure to

This past month I had the pleasure to witness our parish citizens display the best form of kindness. The kindness that only comes from the heart.

The Ascension Parish Sheriff’s Department and students volunteered to make this heart warming event the best it possibly could be for the Special Olympians and participants. Every child was treated special with hugs, support and enthusiasm and the athletes all enjoyed that day as winners.

Special Olympics Louisiana (SOLA) is a state wide not-for-profit 501©3

the athletes all enjoyed that day as winners. Special Olympics Louisiana (SOLA) is a state wide

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the athletes all enjoyed that day as winners. Special Olympics Louisiana (SOLA) is a state wide
the athletes all enjoyed that day as winners. Special Olympics Louisiana (SOLA) is a state wide
organization that changes lives by promoting understanding, acceptance and inclusion between people with and without

organization that changes lives by promoting understanding, acceptance and inclusion between people with and without intellectual disabilities. We provide sports training and

athletic competitions and we transform lives through the joy of sport, everyday, everywhere. Currently, 14,639 children and adults with intellectual disabili- ties in Louisiana participate in

with intellectual disabili- ties in Louisiana participate in Kids Meal Night $2.99 Wednesday Tues W ed
Kids Meal Night $2.99 Wednesday Tues W ed Thur Steak N ight A Y CE
Kids Meal Night
$2.99
Wednesday
Tues
W ed
Thur
Steak N ight
A Y CE Craw fish
A Y CE Shrim p
The Fresh Seafood
Market
is back with
Live Crawfish.
37306 Perkins Road • 673.1799
(Formerly Tommy’s Fish House)
Fresh Seafood Market is back with Live Crawfish. 37306 Perkins Road • 673.1799 (Formerly Tommy’s Fish

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over approximately 100 competitions. We are also a global social movement. With initiatives to activate
over approximately 100 competitions. We are also a global social movement. With initiatives to activate
over approximately 100 competitions. We are also a global social movement. With initiatives to activate
over approximately 100 competitions. We are also a global social movement. With initiatives to activate

over approximately 100 competitions. We are also a global social movement. With initiatives to activate youth, engage individuals with and without intellectual disabilities, build communities, and improve the health of our athletes - we're changing the game for people young and old and asking you to be a part of it all.

the health of our athletes - we're changing the game for people young and old and
the health of our athletes - we're changing the game for people young and old and

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Leadership Ascension Groundbreaking Event Leadership Ascension is an innovative program sponsored by The Ascension Chamber

Leadership

Ascension

Groundbreaking

Event

Leadership Ascension is an innovative program sponsored by The Ascension Chamber of Commerce to assist in preparing emerging community leaders for leadership positions in local government, business and community affairs

Leadership Ascension class

projects are designed to exam- ine important issues within the community and work with either a non-profit organization or government entity to relieve or solve an existing problem This year’s Leadership Ascension is comprised of four groups of community leaders.

The “Rockin’ Through the Ages” project team chose to help the Gonzales Council On Aging (COA), and after discussion with COA leadership and an inspection of the facility, the project team saw an opportunity to develop an outdoor gathering space for members that is safe and

protected from environmental conditions.

Groundbreaking for this project was held on March 9, 2017. The scope of the project is to build a 15 x 20 gazebo complete with relaxing sitting areas, landscaping, and electrical accessibility for fans and radio. The “Rockin’ Through the Ages” project team is asking for monetary donations as well as supplies or physical labor to assist in this worthwhile cause. You may purchase a rocking chair for under the gazebo with a donation of $300. If purchased, the rocking chair will feature a metal plate with your name or company name on

it. For more information, please contact Traci Furlow at your convenience by email at traci.furlow1969@gmail.com or by phone at 225-614-5565.

This year’s “Rockin’ Through the Ages” project team members are: Bethany Duplessis- The Spa House Day Spa, Ryan Falgoust- Commerce Title , Traci Furlow- Adam McCarty State Farm , Alysha Guillot- BASF , Joshua Ory- Forte & Tablada , Craig Stevens- Genesis 360, LLC , Shawn Winchester- Ascension Parish Sherriff’s Office , Sandy Zaher- EATEL , Lynell Zirkle- Rubicon.

Genesis 360, LLC , Shawn Winchester- Ascension Parish Sherriff’s Office , Sandy Zaher- EATEL , Lynell
Genesis 360, LLC , Shawn Winchester- Ascension Parish Sherriff’s Office , Sandy Zaher- EATEL , Lynell

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LEGACY ESTATE & ELDER LAW OF LOUISIANA, LLC

Announces a New Attorney:

Lisa L. Henson

Legacy Estate & Elder Law of Louisiana, LLC in Prairieville, LA is excited to announce that attorney Lisa L. Henson has joined the firm.

Lisa L. Henson is an attorney practicing in the areas of Estate Planning and Estate Administra- tion (Successions and Trust Ad- ministration). Originally from Bunkie, Louisiana, Lisa graduated from Baylor University with a Bachelor of Arts in English in 1990, and she received her law degree from Baylor University School of Law in 1993.

A former Texas attorney, she began her legal career as an assistant district and county

attorney, prosecuting misdemeanor and juvenile cases. She has previously worked with New York Life Insurance’s Nau- tilus Group, providing guidance on estate and business planning to agents with high net worth clients, and with U.S. Trust Bank of America Private Wealth Management as a trust officer and a trust information specialist. She has now returned to her home state to do what she envisioned herself doing when she started law school.

Lisa is married to Brian Henson, and they have two boys, ages 14 and 7 and they live in West Baton Rouge Parish. Lisa is a very active member of the Church at Addis and enjoys adventures with her family, playing the piano, writing, baking, and reading mystery novels.

Legacy Estate & Elder Law of Louisiana, LLC assists clients in the areas of estate planning and

administration, elder law, special needs, life care planning and Medicaid and Veterans Adminis- tration benefits planning. Its mission is to help Louisiana families leave a lasting legacy through proper planning.

For more information on the services provided by Legacy Estate & Elder Law of Louisiana, LLC or to register for a free Estate Planning Seminar, please contact our office at 225-744-0027 or services@legacycenterla.com.

our office at 225-744-0027 or services@legacycenterla.com. 30 Years of Top Notch Services Braud Company Welding &
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Rotary Club of Gonzales Plans Annual Food Fest

Members of the Gonzales Ro- tary Club have been busy preparing for its Annual Food Fest scheduled for March 28, 2017 at the Lamar-Dixon Expo Center Trade Mart Building. This annual event benefits the St. Theresa Food Bank.

“The Rotary Club has spon- sored this event since the late 1990‘s. It continues to be a sig- nificant resource in efforts to feed people in need throughout our city and parish,” said Sheena Falgoust, 2017, Chair- man of the Food Fest Commit- tee. Members of the Food Fest Committee, pictured from left to right are: David Herring, 2016-2017 Gonzales Rotary President; Tracy Browning, Restaurant Chair; Glenda Sha- heen, Past President; Craig

Restaurant Chair; Glenda Sha- heen, Past President; Craig Walling, Ticket Master; Sheena Falgoust, Committee Chairman;

Walling, Ticket Master; Sheena Falgoust, Committee Chairman; and committee members, Anna Sparacino, Rae Milano, Martin McConnell, Dr. James Jean- sonne and Willie Robinson.

Pre-sale tickets are $25.00 each

and may be purchased at several businesses in the Gonzales area including Ascension Funeral Home, Lofton Staffing, and Jeansonne & Spillers Dentistry. Tickets may also be purchased at the St. Theresa Church of- fice, from any Gonzales Rotary

Club member or by emailing caw5060@aol.com. Restau- rants interested in participating may contact tracy@tourascen- sion.com. Join us for great food from our local vendors and en- tertainment. You will not leave hungry!

tracy@tourascen- sion.com. Join us for great food from our local vendors and en- tertainment. You will

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Gonzales Garden Club Sets the Stage for Flower Show The first item on the agenda
Gonzales Garden Club Sets the Stage for Flower Show The first item on the agenda

Gonzales Garden Club Sets the Stage for Flower Show

The first item on the agenda of the March 1 meeting of the Gonzales Garden Club was a demonstration presentation by longtime Member Marilyn Rice. She set up a comprehensive exhibit of floral design resources and analyzed three creative niches of arrangements that she titled “The Petrified Forest” Creative Horizontal Design, “Wine and Roses” Tablescape, and “China Doll” Oriental Design. Rice then disassembled them to show the audience their compositions and constructed three more niche displays, all the while explaining the reasons for her choices. Rice spoke of design elements such as color har- monies, balance and proportion, textures, and the allusion of movement. She described color schemes as monochromatic

of movement. She described color schemes as monochromatic (tints, tones or shades of a single hue),
of movement. She described color schemes as monochromatic (tints, tones or shades of a single hue),

(tints, tones or shades of a single hue), triadic (three contrasting colors) and analo- gous (three related colors). Her tips for size and proportion in- cluded elevating the base of the flower arrangement to center it vertically in the space while not allowing plant material to

vertically in the space while not allowing plant material to exceed a one-inch buffer from the

exceed a one-inch buffer from the top of the niche. The background fabric should complement the flower color, and no plant material should touch the sides or bottom of the niche. Rice encouraged

touch the sides or bottom of the niche. Rice encouraged beginner floral designers to incorporate pieces

beginner floral designers to incorporate pieces of wood, glass figurines, and sculptural pieces into their displays to enhance the artistic concept of the flower arrangement. Lastly, GGC Members Lorraine Ramirez and Priscilla Monson generously shared their own horizontal floral designs for critique to culminate the program on “Sharing Years of Design Experience”. This month’s horticultural hint is to apply fertilizer to azaleas, gardenia, and hy-

hint is to apply fertilizer to azaleas, gardenia, and hy- drangeas during late March to boost

drangeas during late March to boost these plants. The garden tip came from Member Conchita Richey. When using grocery store flowers, fill a container with tepid water and add the flower food from the included packet. Cut the stems on a slant and leave them in the food water overnight in a cool, dark, draft-free place. Create

packet. Cut the stems on a slant and leave them in the food water overnight in

the flower arrangement the next day using a soaked oasis for long-lasting design. The meeting was held at Jamie Trisler’s home in the heart of Gonzales. She and fellow hostesses Cynthia Cagnolatti, Priscilla Monson, Marilyn Oubre, Janis Poche, and Conchita Richey served “meatless” finger sandwiches, salads and desserts during the

finger sandwiches, salads and desserts during the lunch break. The club’s next meeting will be held
finger sandwiches, salads and desserts during the lunch break. The club’s next meeting will be held

lunch break. The club’s next meeting will be held on April 5 in conjunction with their Annual Floral Design Exhibit at the Gonzales Library on Irma Blvd. The theme will be Louisiana’s Natural Beauty.

Irma Blvd. The theme will be Louisiana’s Natural Beauty. Yard of the Month Residential and Commercial

Yard of the Month Residential and Commercial • February & March

Month Residential and Commercial • February & March The home of Jeff & Sandy Gaudin at

The home of Jeff & Sandy Gaudin at 1731 S. Augusta in Gonzales was awarded February’s Residential Yard of the Month for its early bloom of azaleas. The garden included crinum, camellia, knock out roses and compacta holly, and the sego palm.

knock out roses and compacta holly, and the sego palm. This magnificent front yard belongs to

This magnificent front yard belongs to Jim and Susan Kimes at 1031 Eva Street in Gonzales. It was chosen as Gonzales Garden Club’s Residential Yard of the Month for March for its plush design and variations of color and texture. The beds are comprised of agapanthus, azaleas, privet, olive, pomegranate, pear trees and crape myrtle. Owner Susan Kimes noted that the plants bloom in a continual succession from spring though summer into autumn adding interest and beauty to this quiet neighborhood.

adding interest and beauty to this quiet neighborhood. Dr. Dale Doty stands in front of River

Dr. Dale Doty stands in front of River Parishes Community Colleges as the proud recipient of Gonzales Garden Club's Commercial Landscape of the Month Award for March. The property that was a cow pasture in 2013 is now a sprawling campus of stately buildings, walkways and parking lots lined with spring blooming azaleas and summer blooming crape myrtles.

spring blooming azaleas and summer blooming crape myrtles. The Gonzales Garden Club chose KopyKats Printing Company

The Gonzales Garden Club chose KopyKats Printing Company at 226 Burnside Avenue as February’s Commercial Landscape of the Month for its neat maintenance and bright colors. Plantings included blooming pansies and knock out roses with a healthy row of boxwood shrubs forming a hedge below the windows.

Are you Surviving? I want to discuss something relevant and life changing. So, I ask

Are you Surviving?

I want to discuss something relevant and life changing. So, I ask you…

Are you happy with where you are in life? Are you really fulfilled?

A guest pastor asked us a few

weeks ago, “Are you surviving?”

If so, that’s not exactly where

you want to be, unless you’ve recently been through a life

around us to flourish. As human beings, we should all be growing and developing - emotionally, mentally, and cer- tainly spiritually. Stagnant water is not good to drink from, and neither should we be stagnant.

Have a clear VISION

Every brilliant idea or invention started with and idea and that idea had a vision. Why not have a vision for your life? If your vision is hazy or uncertain, make it clear. Spend some time

vision is hazy or uncertain, make it clear. Spend some time threatening event. You should not

threatening event. You should not survive but thrive. But in order to thrive, you’ve got to have the right environment. Just like plants need sunlight, water, and sometimes fertilizer, we also need elements in and

with yourself and use your imagination. If you would consider your perfect life what would it look like? Maybe its time for you to sit down with pen and paper and write down what that vision look like and

contain. I believe that as life happens we lose our hope for what we thought would be an amazing future for ourselves, so it’s important that as life happens we keep our vision, even if that vision changes! Now, I’m not saying life is perfect, (for in this life we will have hardships) but we should never give up on our hopes and dreams. It’s what gives us that sparkle in our eyes, that thing that everyone knows but can’t define, and that passion to get up in the morning with undeniable energy in our bodies.

Surround yourself with people that INSPIRE

Just like natural elements (the sun, wind, earth, and rain) make up the environment around

you, so do people! Make sure you surround yourself with people that will allow you to thrive. People that are in their purpose inspire me the most. That doesn’t mean making the most money or having the biggest title at a workplace, but it means someone who knows what they were put on this Earth to do and are doing it. So, put yourself in the presence of people that encourage you, lift you up, and believe in your success even before you believe it.

Faith without ACTIONS is dead

Do you expect to have a fulfilled marriage without kindness and forgiveness? Do you believe you will have an athlete’s body without training? Do you have

faith to get out of debt yet keep spending beyond your means? That won’t happen without action on your part. You must continue to have wisdom concerning your vision and what it will take to achieve it. When you truly believe, walking out your vision is easy. That’s something that will take

discipline

You may have a setback and want to give up, but you’ve got to keep on moving towards that goal if your want that dream to manifest.

believing

I mean.

You see how all of these work

together to define your pathway

to success?

surround yourself with positive

people that inspire and uplift you, and finally, create your plan of action to walk towards that dream. So, don’t just survive but thrive!

Have a vision,

and finally, create your plan of action to walk towards that dream. So, don’t just survive

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Dramatic Rings And Earrings Topping Runways with Layne Gautreau This season’s red-carpet fa- vorites include

Dramatic Rings And Earrings Topping Runways

with Layne Gautreau

This season’s red-carpet fa- vorites include the brightest and biggest eye-catching statement styles in colorful stacking rings, knuckle-dust- ing cocktail rings, and glitter- ing right-hand rings, aswell as the classic look of dazzling neck-skimming drop earrings and oversize hoop earrings, which are among today’s top earring trends.

Stylish Oversize Rings in both karat gold and sterling silver continue the recent head- turning trend of featuring elongated settings with

head- turning trend of featuring elongated settings with sparkling diamonds combined with big, bold colored gems

sparkling diamonds combined with big, bold colored gems in a rainbow of pink, orange, blue, green, yellow, purple, and red colors. Halo and doubl halo set- tings are designed to give these high-fashion rings a bigger and more sparkling look.

Trendy Drop Earrings give you a wide choice of exciting styles including chandeliers, pendants, and openwork de-

styles including chandeliers, pendants, and openwork de- signs in gold, platinum, or ster- ling silver in

signs in gold, platinum, or ster- ling silver in many elegant tex- tures and finishes set with diamonds, pearls, or colored gems. Swing- ing hoop earrings include two and three inch sizes aswell as large inside-outside diamond hoops which sparkle with every movement you make.

Birthstones

March -

Aquamarine and Bloodstone Those born in March are fortunate to have two birthstones to cho
Aquamarine and Bloodstone
Those born in
March are
fortunate to
have two
birthstones to
cho
ose from

Aquamarine and Bloodstone. Although these two gems are strikingly different, both promise courage to those of March birth.

Aquamarine is a transparent sea blue beryl once prized by ancient Greek sailors on long voyages. Opaque bloodstone isn’t red at all; it is actually a dark green chalcedony with vivid red flecks and it has been a favorite of men since medieval times.

and it has been a favorite of men since medieval times. Did you know! Opals require

Did you know!

Opals require special care? This beautiful, translucent gem displays a continuous array of vivid rainbow colors seemingly suspended in a luminous white or black base. The name opal is a shortened version of the Roman word “opalus” which means color play. While on the Mohs scale, opals have a hardness of 5.5, they are composed of 3% - 23% water, so they should never be allowed to

of 3% - 23% water, so they should never be allowed to freeze or dry out.

freeze or dry out. Avoid ex- treme or rapid changes in tem- perature while wearing and storing your opal jewelry. Also avoid cleaning products, ultrasonic and steam jewelry cleaners. Whether you are considering a beautiful opal piece for yourself or a loved one, or your current opal jewelry has lost its luster and needs a prof.

a beautiful opal piece for yourself or a loved one, or your current opal jewelry has

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Look Your Best This Summer Lip Inhancement Lip enhancement is a cosmetic procedure that can
Look Your Best This Summer Lip Inhancement Lip enhancement is a cosmetic procedure that can

Look Your Best This Summer

Lip Inhancement

Lip enhancement is a cosmetic procedure that can give you fuller, plumper lips. Injectable dermal fillers are the most

Before
Before
After
After

commonly used method of lip enhancement. There are many types of dermal fillers that can be injected into your lips and around your mouth. The most common fillers today are products that contain hyaluronic acid. Hyaluronic acid is a natural substance found in the body. It helps increase volume in the lips!

IPL/Brown Spot Reduction

Intense Pulsed Light (IPL) a popular medical treatment that corrects broken capillaries and hyper-pigmentation (age spots) caused by age and sun damage. IPL also stimulates the production of collagen and elastin, which plumps the skin and gives a more even skin tone.

Microneedling/Skin Pen

Microneedling/Collagen Induction Therapy (CIT): Is a non-surgical skin-tightening

procedure that

controlled injury underneath the skin’s surface, inducing the body

to respond by producing more collagen in the treated area. The skin plumps and thickens in response to the stimulus, reducing the appearance of scars, pore size and fine lines. SkinPen allows for controlled induction of the skin’s self-repair process by creating thousands of precise micro-injuries in the dermis, automatically triggering new collagen synthesis without scar tissue formation.

creates a

Botox

Botox is the most popular cosmetic non surgery treatment, with more than 6 million Botox treatments administered each year. Botox is most commonly used to treat forehead lines, frown lines and crow’s feet by relaxing the underlying muscles. Williamson Cosmetic Center was named Top 50 practices in the United States by Allergan producer of Botox and Juvederm.

Treatment Special of the Month

Prestige Peel

$200

Skin Pen

$250

Offer Good thru April 30th

and Juvederm. Treatment Special of the Month Prestige Peel $200 Skin Pen $250 Offer Good thru
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YOUR ESTATE MATTERS

YOUR ESTATE MATTERS Keys, Please: How to Gently Keep Unsafe Older Drivers Off the Road We

Keys, Please:

How to Gently Keep Unsafe Older Drivers Off the Road

We as Americans are a free-

wheeling society.

cars, and we like our freedom to go where we please, when we please. But as loved ones get older, you may find your-

self in the unenviable position

of trying to keep them off the

road when they start to lose

the ability to operate an auto-

mobile safely.

then becomes, what’s the best

way to take the keys away?

We like our

The question

As people get older, their abil- ity to drive safely can be im- pacted by a variety of factors. Failing eyesight can be a prob- lem, as can poor hearing. Slowed reaction times can in- crease the chance of accidents. Even medications can have side effects that make driving

more difficult.

your loved one’s freedom to drive may be removing what

they see as their last source of independence, and they may not surrender the keys will-

ingly.

you can enlist the help of oth-

ers to keep you from being the bad guy in your loved one’s eyes.

But removing

With some planning,

A good place to start is an

open and honest conversation with your loved one, explain

By Linda Melancon

ing your concerns and seeking his or her agreement that it’s time to consider other means of transportation. Be ready to suggest other options for transportation, such as public transit, the aid of other family members, or transportation services offered by some elder- care companies. Having an- other way to get around may help older drivers let go of the keys more easily.

If that conversation falls on ears that aren’t ready to hear it, you may want to enlist the help of your loved one’s physi- cian or eye care specialist. They can offer counsel as to the dangers posed by health or vision problems, and often, a person will listen to their care providers where they won’t lis- ten to their children.

You may also consider meeting with someone at the Depart- ment of Motor Vehicles to ask that the Department request a new vision examination, paper

exam, or driving test for your

loved one.

decision as to someone’s abil- ity to drive safely based on their own examination will de- termine whether your loved one can stay on the road - if Mom or Dad can’t pass the written exam or a road test,

their license won’t be renewed. This does remove the child from the decision-making process, and may take some of the tension out of the surren-

der of driving privileges.

be aware, Mom or Dad may want to know whose idea it was that they be retested, so it’s a good idea to be prepared to have that conversation with them if the need arises.

The Department’s

But

There is also an option local to the Baton Rouge area that may

offer valuable assistance in this

situation.

order, Baton Rouge Rehabili-

tation Hospital will conduct a comprehensive driving evalua- tion to aid in determining an individual’s ability to drive

safely.

both a clinical portion, con- ducted by an occupational therapist to determine the im- pact of health conditions (such as stroke or Alzheimer’s) and functional limitations (such as vision problems and slower re- action times) on driving safety, and an on-road evaluation, completed by a Driving Rehab

Specialist, to assess the individ-

ual’s driving ability.

evaluation is completed, the occupational therapist and Driving Rehab Specialist will make recommendations for driving safety, which may in- clude driver training, adaptive equipment for the vehicle, lim- itations on driving distance, time of day, or speed, and, if necessary, complete restriction of driving privileges. For more

Upon a physician’s

The evaluation includes

Once the

information, you can visit their website,

https://brrehab.com/site342.

php, or contact them at 225-

927-0567.

As with so many other deci- sions regarding aging relatives, removing driving privileges can be a difficult decision, and has the potential to cause a great deal of tension and hurt be- tween those involved. Enlist- ing support from resources such as those discussed here can help defuse a lot of the tension and bring peace of mind knowing that your loved one won’t be behind the wheel when driving is no longer safe for them.

Ms. Melancon has engaged in

the practice of law in Ascension Parish for the last eighteen

years.

practice is estate planning, probate, special needs planning and elder law. For more information or to attend an upcoming estate planning seminar, call her office at (225) 744-0027.

The primary focus of her

Hey Dr. Rob, I have a question, after my nap. Me too, after my nap.
Hey Dr. Rob,
I have a question,
after my nap.
Me too,
after my nap.
AASSCCEENNSSIIOONN PPAARRIISSHH
AANNIIMMAALL HHOOSSPPIITTAALL
222255 774444 44990055

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Mobile-First Indexing: The New Direction of Google Search 2017 is the year mobile dominates desktop
Mobile-First Indexing:
The New Direction of
Google Search 2017
is the year mobile
dominates desktop
by Orhan Mc Millan
dezinsINTERACTIVE

In the year 2015, a tremendous revolution started taking place, as it marked the first time that Google searches on mobile devices surpassed desktop use. Since then, the margin between the two has only grown exponentially larger. Currently Google’s search engine is re- volved around desktop-based indexing, but on November 4th, 2016 Google released a blog confirming that in the upcoming months, it would be permanently pushing mobile-first indexing, eventually, on a larger scale. In other words, consider your mobile and desktop website with the same level of importance.

Currently, mobile-first indexing is in the experimental stages mainly including a limited group of users that will be expanded once Google is confident that they have achieved a desirable user experience. If your website is both desktop and mobile friendly, then you will have nothing to worry about. If not, you have to make Mobile SEO a priority, as mobile-first indexing will become permanent this year. Check out these Basic Mobile SEOTips for yourWebsite.

1. Conduct a Mobile- Friendly Test

The first step is to check if, and how mobile friendly your website is.Test each individual page of your website on

search.google.com/search-con-

sole/mobile-friendly by verifying that each are mobile responsive, as pages that are not mobile friendly will be pulling your SEO results down.

2. Is your Mobile Version indexed correctly?

Double check if the mobile

version of your site is properly indexed by simply Google searching your domain on a mobile device. If you see results, then everything is correct, but if not, then you more than likely have an issue or two to fix.

3. Check Google Search

Console

Another basic tip involves going to the Google Search Console dashboard > SearchTraffic > Mobile Usability. In this section you will learn everything you need to know about mobile usability issues currently affecting your site, including a graph with your mobile usability status vs. time, a report with the total number of mobile issues, information about each and a list of pages that indicate the specific problems.

4. Mobile Content

should be equal to

Desktop Content

Check to see if you can find any differences between your desktop

and mobile site. If any differences are present regarding content and design as it appears on mobile, make a note of it, and collaborate with your web developers and editors on changes that might need to be made. The content should be identical but the presentation may need to be adjusted depending on the quan- tity.

5 Optimize your Site Speed

The speed of your website, especially your mobile site, should be skyrocketing. In order to determine your site speed, run a page speed test (a variety of them can be found using a simple Google search). Most of them will run and tell you if there are any issues with the load time with any of your pages. Scores and issues will differ between each individual page, so make sure that you implement these tests on all pages of your site, making the needed improvements based on suggestions.

6. Optimize for Mobile Keywords

Already, searchers on mobile are slightly different than on desktop. For instance, voice searches already make up about 20% of searches on mobile devices, resulting in the style of queries to be slightly different than it is on desktop, mainly because people get more personal and express their queries in a conversational manner. If you’re looking to view your mobile queries that are relevant to your business, go into your Google Search Console > SearchTraffic > Search Analytics > and from here you can check out the reports for queries, clicks, positions and even comparisons between mobile and desktop.

7. Take Care of your Local SEO

In this day and age, mobile SEO search is becoming increasingly more focused on local search, mainly because user intent has become an important factor for Google. Currently, 80% of mobile searches relate to things that are in the direct neighborhood of the searcher, indicating that local SEO optimization is vital for your mobile success.

The internet has changed drasti- cally since its creation, and 2017 will be the historic year for mobile SEO as it takes a permanent domination over desktop on Google searches. Change is inevitable, but by staying on top of the latest trends, you’re already a step ahead of the game.The team at dezinsINTER- ACTIVE is always available to answer any questions you may have.

a step ahead of the game.The team at dezinsINTER- ACTIVE is always available to answer any

19

Sedation

Dentistry

By Calvin Bessonet, DDS,FAGD Ascension Premier Dental

Dr. Bessonet is one of only a few dentists in the country trained and certified to provide IV sedation in the dental office.

Does the thought of having your teeth fixed make your entire body tense with fear? Would you rather endure the agony of a toothache than step foot in a dentist's office? You're not alone. A lot of people are so pho- bic about going to the dentist that they prefer not to have any treatment. For people who avoid dentists like the plague, sedation dentistry may take away some of their anxi- ety. Sedation can be used for everything from invasive proce- dures to a simple teeth cleaning. How it's used depends on the severity of the fear.

What Is Sedation Dentistry?

Sedation dentistry uses medication to help patients relax during dental procedures. It's sometimes referred to as "sleep dentistry.” The levels of sedation used include:

• Minimal sedation -- you are awake but relaxed.

• Moderate sedation (formerly

called "conscious sedation") -- You may slur your words when speaking and not remember much of the procedure.

• Deep sedation -- you are on

the edge of consciousness but can

still be awakened.

• General anesthesia -- you are completely unconscious.

What Types of Sedation Are Used in Dentistry?

The following types of sedation are used in dentistry:

Inhaled minimal sedation. You breathe nitrous oxide -- otherwise known as "laughing gas" -- combined with oxygen through a mask that's placed over your nose. The gas helps you relax. Your dentist can control the amount of sedation you receive, and the gas tends to wear off quickly. This is the only form of sedation where you may be able to drive yourself home after the procedure.

Oral sedation. Depending on the total dose given, oral sedation can range from minimal to moderate. For minimal sedation, you take a pill. Typically, the pill is Halcion, which is a member of the same drug family as Valium, and it's usually taken about an

hour before the procedure. The pill will make you drowsy, al- though you'll still be awake. A larger dose may be given to pro- duce moderate sedation. Some people become groggy enough from moderate oral sedation to actually fall asleep during the pro- cedure but this is rare.

IV moderate sedation. You receive the sedative drug through a vein, so it goes to work more quickly. This method allows the dentist to “titrate” the drugs, which means he can continually adjust the level of se- dation until it is ideal for the in- dividual patient. You cannot do this with oral sedation. Iv seda- tion also makes it possible to give multiple combination of drugs to suit the patient, as all people have different tolerances to different types of drugs. Regardless of which type of sedation you receive, you'll also typically need a local anesthetic -- numbing medication at the site where the dentist is working in the mouth -- to relieve pain if the procedure causes any discomfort.

Who Can Have Sedation at the Dentist's?

Sedation is most appropriate for people with a real fear or anxiety that is preventing them from going to the dentist.

Sedation dentistry may also be appropriate for people who:

• have a low pain threshold

• can't sit still in the dentist's chair

• have very sensitive teeth

• have a bad gag reflex

• need a large amount of dental work completed

Sometimes, children are given se- dation if they are terrified of going to the dentist or refuse to cooperate during the visit. Ni- trous oxide tends to be safe in children, and just about any den- tist can administer it.

Can Any Dentist Perform Sedation?

All states require dentists to provide proof of advanced training and a certain number of sedation cases completed under supervision in order to obtain a license for IV sedation. It's im- portant to make sure that your dentist is trained and qualified to administer the type and level of sedation you will be receiving. The dentist should monitor your vital signs during the procedure following the American Dental Association's guidelines. The dentist should also have oxygen - - artificial ventilation -- and drugs that reverse the effects of seda- tion on hand in case you need them.

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• Invisalign Certified
• Laser-Assisted Decay Detection
• Porcelain Veneers
• Implants
• Wisdom Teeth
Ascension
PREMIER DENTAL
Calvin G. Bessonet, DDS, FAGD
13375 Hwy 73, Suite 1 • Geismar, LA 70734 • Call: 225.673.6910 • www. AscensionDentist.com

20

"Proudly Sponsored by Dutchtown Physical Therapy" Spring Break April 13th-21st BeonTopoftheSchedules State
"Proudly Sponsored by Dutchtown Physical Therapy"
Spring Break
April 13th-21st
BeonTopoftheSchedules
State Testing Windows
toFinishuptheYear
April 26-28 • 5th-8th Grades • ELA and Math Test • Computer Based
May 2-3 • 5th-8th Grades • Social Studies Test • Computer Based
May 5
5th-8th Grades • Science Test • Computer Based
May 1st-5th • 3rd -4th Grades • ELA, Math, Social Studies, Science • Paper/Penci
2017-2018PUBLICSCHOOLREGISTRATIONHeadStart/PreK/Kindergarten
Monday, April 3, 2017
Wednesday, April 5, 2017
Friday, April 7, 2017
Central Primary
Oak Grove Primary:
Duplessis Primary:
Lakeside Primary:
Dutchtown Primary:
Lake Elementary:
Prairieville Primary:
Galvez Primary:
9:00 A.M. to 12:00 P.M.
Spanish Lake Primary
9:00 A.M. to 12:00 P.M.
9:00 A.M. to 12:00 P.M.
Tuesday, April 4, 2017
Thursday, April 6, 2017
PARENTS: The following information is
required for Kindergarten Registration:
Ascension Head Start
Donaldsonville Primary
St. Amant Primary
9:00 A.M. to 12:00 P.M.
G.W. Carver Primary:
Gonzales Primary
Pecan Grove Primary
Sorrento Primary
9:00 A.M. to 12:00 P.M.
• Child’s Birth Certificate
• Up to date Immunization/shot records
• Proof of Residence (example: utility
bill/including service address)
• Child’s Social Security card
(not just a number)
Those entering Kindergarten should be five years of age by September 30, 2017.
"Your Community
Physical Therapy
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Stephen Jackson, PT, DPT
DUTCHTOWN PHYSICAL THERAPY • 13053 HIGHWAY 73, SUITE B • GEISMAR, LOUISIANA 70734
(225) 744-3631 • fax (225) 744-3647

21

Brady James Chifici, a name that will live forever in the hearts of disabled children.
Brady James Chifici, a name that
will live forever in the hearts of
disabled children. Brady was
diagnosed with Spinal Bifida at
22 weeks into my wife’s
pregnancy, although we cannot
question God’s plan, it was his
will. Brady passed on to our Lord
on December 21, 2016. This
horrible life changing experience
has brought us to want to be able
to help families that have went
through the same experience we
went through or are going through
on a daily basis. My wife and I
have started the Brady James
Chifici Sport Foundation in honor
of our little man that we have lost.
Jewelers ( Layne Gautreaux), D &
J
groceries( Donna and Jeff
Kling), The Grapevine ( Brent
Barbier) , The Donaldsonville
Rotary club
( Marvin Gros and
Sandy Gautreaux, Lamar Dixon
Expo Center(Kyle Rogers and Jazz
Traylor), LMR Digital Billboards
(
Denise Grafisi), Geaux Shirts
(
Jerry and Jamie Binder) , Pat
On February 18, 2017 at the
VFW Hall on Churchpoint Road in
Gonzales Louisiana with the help
of Brent Gautreaux, we held our
benefit to help our disabled
children of our community and
surrounding areas. We raised
funds to provide families with
medical issues, sickness, and
low income families with some
financial issues due to caring for
their disable loved ones. Through
the help of family, friends, and our
surrounding businesses,
Ascension Clean and Care ( Paul
and Connie Manning), Layne’s
Rusha’s Remodeling and Race
Team ( Pat Rusha), KPR
Productions (Kevin Roberts), and
team members who all take part
in making the foundation grow
each day. Needless to say were
far from done, at Lamar Dixon on
April 22, 2017 we will hold a
benefit on what would have been
Brady James birth day. The benefit
will consist of a Jambalaya cook
off, Car show, Bike show,
spacewalk for the kids, craft
booths, silent auction, live music,
DJ’s, and Brady James Chifici
Sport Foundation merchandise
for sale.
All proceeds go to our sick and
disabled children of our commu-
nity. Please come out and support
a
great cause! For more informa-
tion please call Justin or Krystle
Chifici at 225-229-2998.
Brady James Fundraiser
Lamar Dixon on April 22, 2017
• Jambalaya cook off • Car show • Bike show
Craft booths • Silent auction • Live music

22

REALTOR ® LOGIC WITH THE ONEAL GROUP

REALTOR ® LOGIC WITH THE ONEAL GROUP The Compound Effect: Building Your Household’s Wealth Wealth is

The Compound Effect:

Building Your Household’s Wealth

Wealth is within reach for many people; however, according to a recent study 63 percent of Americans said it’s not likely they’ll become rich. 1

Don’t just dream of being wealthy; start taking the steps to make it a reality. There is no secret to becoming rich: it takes time, sacrifice and good financial sense. Here are a few ways to build your household’s wealth.

Let Compound Interest Work for You

Compound interest is your interest earning interest. While the concept may work against you when you take out a loan to buy a car or use your credit card, it works in your favor when saving money. Your money will grow exponentially the longer you save: the more money you’ve saved, the more your money will grow. For example, if your savings is growing at a rate of four percent, your investment will double in eight years and quadruple in 16 years.

Tap into Your Home Appreciation

Experts expect home prices to ap- preciate 3.24 percent and grow by 21.4 percent cumulatively. 2 If a homeowner purchases a home this year for $250,000, they could earn more than $40,000 in equity over the next five years. Although the home value of the average Ameri- can family’s home is $165,000, home values vary by market. 3

Build Equity in Your Home

One of the most compelling reasons to own a home is it allows you to build wealth over time. Saving for a down payment, especially if you plan to put down more than 20 percent, helps you adopt good financial habits. The more you put down when you buy, the higher your share of equity when you close. Although for the first five to seven years, the majority of your payment will go toward interest, over time more money will be applied to the principal. Build equity sooner by choosing a shorter amortization term. While your payment may be higher, you’ll likely qualify for a lower interest rate and will pay less interest over the life of the loan.

Sources: 1. Bank Rate.com

2. Pulsenomics, Home Price Expectation

Survey Q4 2016

3. Statistic Brain, August 1, 2016

4. The Motley Fool, July 30, 2016

Pay Down Your Mortgage…or Not

Many homeowners grapple with whether or not to pay down their mortgage. On one hand, if you pay it down, or pay it off early, you’ll save money on interest, which you can use to make other investments. On the other hand, if your goal is to be debt free, it’s better to pay off your higher-interest debt, such as credit card debt, first before paying down your mortgage debt. Additionally, if you’re saving for retirement, putting extra cash toward your retirement accounts will help you build a nice nest egg to enjoy later on. Your financial advisor can help you decide if paying off or paying down your mortgage is right for your goals.

Purchase Investment Property

Investment properties provide passive income to your growing financial portfolio. More than 25 percent of Americans say real estate is the best way to invest money you may not need for the next 10 years. 4 While many people flip houses to make money—that is, they buy a home at a low price, fix it up and sell it quickly—others purchase multi- family properties to create monthly cash flow to save or to reinvest in other properties.

The longer you own a property, the better investment it becomes as you’ll continue to build equity. While rental costs rise with inflation, your mortgage will remain the same. The best part? Once you pay off the mortgage, your cash flow will increase.

There are tax benefits to owning investment property as well. You may be able to claim deductions for depreciation, as long as it fits within the guidelines; repairs, travel expenses, interest and more. If you’re thinking of purchasing investment property, talk to your tax professional to get the details.

Achieve More Wealth by Creating Financial Goals

Setting a goal will help you achieve

your desired level of wealth. Once you achieve one goal, reassess and set the bar higher.

1. What is your idea of wealth?

What do you want your net worth to be in 5 years, in 10 years and in 20 years?

2. Write down your short-term

and long-term goals. Once you have your goals in mind, write them down. This will make it

easier to refer to them later on.

3. Develop a budget to help you reach these goals.

A budget not only helps you

understand where your money goes each month, it may also prevent you from overspending. That way you can have more

money to save and invest.

To increase the amount you

can invest, make adjustments

to your daily spending and

monthly bills, if possible. Look for opportunities to save money and transfer that savings into your accounts.

If you’re curious about the value of your home or looking to invest in homeownership, give us a call!

Ricky O’Neal 225-939-6686 ricky@onealgroupllc.com

Shari O’Neal 225-936-2696 shari@onealgroupllc.com

Shari O’Neal 225-936-2696 shari@onealgroupllc.com 11414 Lake Sherwood N. Baton Rouge LA 70816
Shari O’Neal 225-936-2696 shari@onealgroupllc.com 11414 Lake Sherwood N. Baton Rouge LA 70816

11414 Lake Sherwood N. Baton Rouge LA 70816 www.onealgroupllc.com • 2 2 5 - 5 0 0 - 1 1 2 5

South Louisiana’s 4th Annual Crawfish Boiling Contest Festival Benefitting “Dreams Come True of Louisiana” April

South Louisiana’s 4th Annual Crawfish Boiling Contest Festival Benefitting “Dreams Come True of Louisiana”

April 8, 2017

Gates Open to Public at 9:00 a.m. $5.00 admission Children 12 and under free “We’re bringing back the Cajun Navy”

12 and under free “We’re bringing back the Cajun Navy” We are Looking for Sponsors Have

We are Looking for Sponsors

Have your company’s name displayed on Banners/Signs throughout the day for the various events:

• Car show

• Crawfish boiling contest

• In door-Craft Booths over 200

• Crawfish eating contest

• The band “Chee-Weez”

• Washer board contest

• DJ Booth

• Jambalaya Festival Booth

• Silent Auction

• T-shirt booth

• Kids fishing Rodeo

• Kids play land

• beer/drink booth

• Boiled crawfish booth

• Pony Rides

• Cracklin Cook-Off

• Petting Zoo

• Jambalaya Cook-Off

• Crawfish Stew

• Crawfish Etouffee

• The band ”Na-Na-Sha”

We ask that you consider sponsoring the crawfish boiling cook-off and help continue a Louisiana tradi- tion. An event that will help Louisiana children. All money raised will go to “Dreams Come True of Louisiana”. Granting dreams to children in Louisiana with life threatening illnesses.

Thank you, Rodney Dupuy Jr. 225-328-6735

• Please make checks payable to Dreams Come True. Send check and Logo by: March 14, 2017. Mail to: South Louisiana Crawfish Boiling Contest 44580 Hwy 42, Prairieville, LA 70769 Email Logo to: Cajunlivinncookin@yahoo.com

The Hall for All Occassions! Accommodates up to 300 guest. • Full catering menu •
The Hall for All Occassions! Accommodates up to 300 guest. • Full catering menu •
The Hall for All Occassions! Accommodates up to 300 guest. • Full catering menu •
The Hall for All Occassions! Accommodates up to 300 guest. • Full catering menu •
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• Full catering menu
Outdoor Pavillion
for Weddings
• Space for seminars
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• Birthday parties
Call to set up an appointment
to view our venues.
225.677.5545
17425 Airline Hwy • Prairieville
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FISHINGOUTLOOKFOR2017 Not long ago I ran into an old friend of mine in the gro-

FISHINGOUTLOOKFOR2017

Not long ago I ran into an old friend of mine in the gro- cery store. He explained that he often reads my articles and re- quested that I give a prediction of some kind on what may be some productive fishing spots for the upcoming months. Well, I still fish quite a bit after hunt- ing season is over, but not as much as I used to. With that being said, I am constantly around all types of fishermen at work and through my affiliation with the Ascension Sportsmans League and Louisiana Outdoor Writers Association. Let's start right here at home. We were lucky to get by with a minimal fish kill from the August flood. Fishing in the Amite and Blind River basin should be very good this year. By the time this article is pub- lished the biggest part of the sac-a-lait and bass spawn will be over. These fish can still be caught in good numbers in shal- low water through the end of May. As the summer heat pro- gresses you'll have to fish a little deeper, but the action should still be great. Bluegills and Gog- gle-eyes will do their thing in this area in the early summer and the catches will reach out from our waterways and across Lake Maurepas to the Ruddock area. There is some really good fishing over there. All of our local waterways will be a very good choice for catfishing in April, May, and June. Remem- ber the Bonnet Carre Spillway was open for quite a while last winter and this puts an enor- mous amount of catfish in our water. From all reports that I have gotten so far from the Lake Ver-

rette area shows that the fishing there will be on the upswing for sure. I've already seen some beautiful catches of sac-a-lait and bass from the Grassy Lake area. As usual the awesome Lake Verret catfish bite in the cypress trees should continue as it has for the last several years. If you don't have a boat then purchase yourself a box of cold worms and head to the rocks at Lake Palourde. As soon as the lake comes into view, turn at the first exit to your left. Fish against these rocks or out a little ways with a cork about three feet deep and you'll be home clean- ing a box of catfish by eleven o'- clock. Fish there April, May, and June. Not heresay, I do it regu- larly. We'll see what the Atchafalaya Basin brings as water levels begin to recede. The fishing there may not match what it used to be for some folks but it can still hold its own. There's no place that I've ever seen that compares with its beauty and bounty of fish, birds, frogs, and crawfish. On the salt water side all in- dications from winter catches of specs and reds suggest that the spring and summer fishing should be great. Grand Isle beach catches, depending on the wind, will generally start in April and last throughout the summer with the size of the fish diminishing as time passes on. Try Lake Pontchartrain for specs in the early summer. It's amazing that the fish have made a comeback there after all of the freshwater that has passed through there from the Bonnet Carre opening last January fol- lowed by two floods, one in the spring and one in August. The

specs definitely came back to the lake a little later than normal last winter, but they did return. Lake fishermen are claiming that the freshwater caused a spike in aquatic vegetation in the lake that is holding scores of bait. The fishing there should be very good this summer. Many from this area make tracks for the Reggio-Delacroix area. It stands for reason. It's a little further trip than Lake Pontchartrain, but it's not near as far a truck ride as Grand Isle or Venice. The fishing there will be great at some point but like most areas in the marshland your success will depend on

stretch of highway roadside be- tween Reggio and Delacriox. I have never been to that spot and not been successful. Please try that spot with your kids. There is plenty of great fish- ing just a short drive from our parish. Try the Tchefuncte River, Old River in Morganza, the Gibson area and the new ef- forts to revive False River should make a promising desti- nation in the future. Whatever choice you make, you should not have any problem enjoying many south Louisiana fish fries this summer. That's just another reason to love the region in which we live

wind speed. One plus for this area is you can catch large- mouths and reds in the interior

Till Next Time,

marsh if the specs become too big a challenge.

"Good Luck"

When I find that I've caught my share of fish for the time being I'll turn my efforts to- ward crabbing. Pointe-aux-Ch- enes is an excellent crabbing destination. The Grand Isle beach can be fabulous for crab- bing usually in July and August. One one of my favorite crab- bing locations is a four mile

James "Goosie" Guice

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29

Sgt. Pepper Tackles March Madness

by Bill Delaune

“Genius is a form of madness and we’re all that way.” John Lennon.

I know all you “legal immi-

grants” who migrated to Ascension Parish for one reason or another in the last 20 years or so get tired of hearing us life-long residents lament about the “way things used to be”. In fact, if you would like to get a glimpse of “Prairieville in the Past”, load up the kids one day and come by my family’s “De-

launederosa” land across from St. John’s Catholic Church on Highway 73. There, on the last 80

acres of undeveloped land in the area, you will get tractor rides ($10

a head-hey, we have taxes to pay.),

your own personal bale of hay ($10 a bale) and the kids can feed

and pet a real-live cow ($5 a cow)-

a small price to pay for an

invaluable history lesson. Or you can choose our bonus “Rainy Day Package” where your entire group gets stuck in the ditch-much to the delight of the mud racers in your entourage-and gets rescued by brother-in-law

Mike on his super tractor. We’re talking family entertainment in its purest form here. What brought all this on, you ask? Well, I suppose it was during my annual spring pilgrimage down Alligator Bayou Road where I go to seek wisdom-and maybe borrow

a few bucks-from the great, all-

knowing, all-seeing Sports Ninja. As I strolled down the once

gravel-covered route, the contrast in what it used to be- a wooded area patrolled by Frank and Boodah’s coon dogs-to the sprawling subdivision there now-was never more evident.

I can remember directing friends

to the Alligator Hilton where those famous American singer-songwriters Jim Bullion and Darryl Smith entertained a motley crew of cowboys, hippies, bikers and college kids on Sunday night and having them turn around before arriving-thinking I had jokingly sent them down some dead end road. Even my own boys-back when they were pre-teens-questioned my sanity during a trip to Bayou Paul when I chose Alligator Bayou Road instead of a more conventional route. After miles of curving through the then-desolate wilderness, one finally wondered out loud, “Daddy, are you sure this road has an end?” But now, I was the one wondering if other spring pilgrims

But now, I was the one wondering if other spring pilgrims experienced such drastic changes when

experienced such drastic changes when they returned to their respective shrines over the years. For instance, did Chaucer’s characters ever remark, “I don’t remember Canterbury being this crowded.” Or the swallows who return to Capistrano every March 19-“Damn, Heathcliff, another mission since we were here last year. More steeples, more peoples.” Or the buzzards who come back to Hinckley, Ohio, annually on March 15-“Man, this place used to be so dead.” But my nostalgic memories and whimsical fancies were interrupted by some ear-piercing sounds-loud enough to be heard in my deaf ear-emitting from the rickety old Alligator Hilton Bar. And, believe

me, it wasn’t Jim and Darryl. The unmistakable voice of Sir Paul McCartney echoed through the remaining woodlands asking the age-old question, “Will you still need me, will you still feed me, when I’m 64?” Then another recognizable voice from under the bridge and-to my relief-it was not a troll but the elusive Sports Ninja. “Psst. Hey, Fish Wrap, over here. Happy birthday and all those other formalities.” His voice was barely above a whisper. “Thanks-and you know how much I dig the Beatles. But it’s been four years since I was 64 and why is the music so loud? And why are we whispering?” I asked. “The whole place is bugged,” he replied looking cautiously over both shoulders. “I don’t know if

30

it’s Trump or the Russians or the CIA or that drunk detective from ‘The Killing Fields’. But I’m going to blow their equipment with some Beatle technology from the 60’s. Like when they ran the tape backwards on ‘Strawberry Fields Forever’. I’m using ‘Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band’ right now for obvious reasons.” “Because they experimented with so many different sounds like George Harrison’s haunting sitar solo on ‘Within You and Without You’,” I ventured a guess. “Not bad, Tree Killer. Maybe that rag you and Bully put out is good for something besides a canary cage bottom. Or maybe it’s because it’s the 50th anniversary of the album that revolutionized the recording industry,” he lectured. “I’ve got to admit it’s getting better, a little better all the time…” blared the speakers as if to echo Ninja’s sentiments. How could I have forgotten such a monumental occasion. The Beatles had quit touring in 1967 and gone exclusively into the studio. The concept of “Sgt. Pepper’s” was to have the band perform as their alter-egos and include a variety of styles ranging from music hall (“When I’m 64”) to 60’s trippy (“A Day in the Life”). With the help of their multi-talented, classically trained producer George Martin (often referred to as the “Fifth Beatle”), the Beatles became increasingly experimental and achieved sounds in a studio that were impossible to reproduce in a live performance. The result was the 1967 release of “Sgt. Pepper’s”-an immediate commercial and critical success. Even the album cover was iconic with portraits of everyone from Edgar Allan Poe to Bob Dylan on the top row and Marilyn Monroe among many other dignitaries on the second. The star-studded third row included boxer Sonny Liston, actor Marlon Brando and child star Shirley Temple. “I get by with a little help from my friends…” Ringo was now singing-a tune later made famous by Joe Cocker and the theme from the popular TV show “The Wonder Years”. “So have you come here looking for a little help from your friends, my mild-mannered muckraker? Every spring, it’s the same old song-you’re depressed over another birthday, you can’t tell the Republicans from the Russians and

you can’t pick your nose in the March Madness pools,” he accurately assessed. “Well, I can’t help you with the first two. But some of our mutual friends from ‘Sgt. Pepper’s’ are here to assist you with the latter. Because of some unfortunate events in each one’s past, we’ll be using Skype so as not to give away their current location. He noticed the puzzled look on my face and assured me there was a method to his madness. “Trust me,” he said. “There’s not enough trust in the world these days. Now without further ado…” On cue, Paul’s voice screamed from the title track, “So let me introduce to you-the one and only Billy Shears…” On a screen set up on the Hilton’s porch appeared a nervous British gentleman who bore some resemblance to Paul McCartney. He spoke in a shaking voice as one who had never adjusted to his role in life. “Do you know what it’s like being Paul’s double? Being the ‘Great Pretender’ all your life? Ever since they recruited me to participate in that 60’s ‘Paul is dead’ hoax, I’ve never had a life of my own. “Just like this year’s UCLA team. They want to pretend they’re National Champions just like the

great Bruin squad of 1967. The coach Steve Alford even has his son Bryce pretending to shoot 3’s like Steve did at Indiana. “So for ‘Great Pretenders’ everywhere, I pick UCLA. Now, when that song is over can you put on The Platters for me…’Oh yes, I’m the great pretender…’” Ninja seemed pleased with his technological skills and his clever associations. “Wait until you hear from ‘Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds’”, he beamed. “Cue the third song from the first side and…” A bawdy lady-of-the-evening type appeared on the screen with enough bling to draw the envy of an NBA player during All-Star week. In a sultry voice she began… “When John wrote the song, he wanted a not-so-subtle reference to the drug LSD in the title. Therefore when I turned to the world’s oldest profession, I altered it some to become ‘Lucy in Disguise with Diamonds’. I got a job in Kentucky supplying my girls as escorts for Louisville basketball recruits. We used to say, “To get the best talent on the court, use the best talent escorts!” “Therefore, Louisville Lucy is going with the Cards to win it all. Oh, by the way, the coach wasn’t too bad on that pool table either.”

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Ninja was full of himself now. “Last song, first side-“For the Benefit of Mr. Kite…” But no face appeared on the screen this time-just a highly- agitated voice in complete denial… “What benefit? I didn’t take any money. Two K’s? Don’t know what you’re talking about. Must mean Kentucky and Kansas. Yeah, I’m sure that’s what it means.” “I guess we’ll accept Mr. Kite’s K’s then since he seems to be flying about these days,” said the Sports Ninja. “And last but not least, representing the second song on the second side-‘Lovely Rita, Meter Maid’.” Still in uniform, a once-perky lady-now wearing a worn face from too many days in the rainy weather began almost apologetically… “I thought that’s why they hired me-to issue tickets to those who broke the law. But when I found all those violations on the North Carolina campus, they told me to keep it quiet or else bad things would happen to me-like tarring my heels and other stuff. But I’ll take Carolina because I know they have good players-even if they don’t go to class.” “Well,” smiled Ninja, “what do you think? Straight from the Sergeant’s mouth-or at least from some of his most famous characters. And remember, these cats have been around for

50 years.” I admitted I was impressed with the effort and the selections. But there was still something that gnawed at me. “Remember the last time we took teams that spelled out L-U-C-K, as in Louisville, UCLA, Carolina and Kansas/Kentucky. Three of them made it but Florida beat out Louisville and we got-well, screwed.” But the Sports Ninja was already piled into his ’49 manure truck with “Good Morning” (third song, second side) complete with roosters crowing coming from inside. “Got to keep moving, Clark Kent. Ever since you hung this Ninja tag on me, the immigration officials think I’m

here illegally. Hell, I can’t even get

on a plane anymore.

with the picks. I’ll see you for the Derby.” He roared off down the road leaving me with thoughts of Beatles, and riding in the back of pickup trucks and 1967 when I did pick UCLA and Lew Alcindor to win it all-maybe my last victory. Give peace a chance.

Good luck

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Useless Random Facts with Kellie • The fastest wind speed not related to tornadoes ever

Useless Random Facts

with Kellie

The fastest wind speed not related to tornadoes ever recorded was during the passage of Tropical Cyclone Olivia on 10 April 1996: an automatic weather station on Barrow Island, Australia, registered a maximum wind gust of 408 km/h (220 kn; 253 mph; 113 m/s).

The two busiest commercial ports in the United States do not border the Atlantic or Pacific, but the Gulf of Mexico:

They're in New Orleans and Houston.

The timing, size, and stream of bubbles in a glass of champagne are influenced by dirt and "gas pockets" on the side of the glass.

Before finishing his education, earning a doctorate, and inventing the sport basketball, Dr. James Naismith was a high school dropout.

Researchers in Japan have developed a camera that can

capture 4.4 trillion frames per second. Phone cameras max out around 120 frames per second.

During sleep, fluid in the body tends to pool in low-lying

areas, which is why most of us wake up with noticeable bags under our eyes.

When hippos are upset, their sweat turns red.

Bananas are curved because they grow towards the sun.

“Facebook Addiction Disorder” is a mental disorder

identified by Psychologists.

Human saliva has a boiling point three times that

of regular water.

The person who invented the Frisbee was cremated and made into Frisbees after he died!

Movie trailers were originally shown after the movie, which is why they were called “trailers”.

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ThoughtsfromBully
ThoughtsfromBully

The Memories and Stupid Stories from the Hunting

2)

Camp (Part

After I showcased our hunting camp news letter last month I have had about twelve friends invite themselves to my camp. They seem to make the same comments like, “You guys are crazy, I want to come there.” We are crazy. I can testify there are a few people in Oxford Crazy as a loon. The best part of that statement is

Oxford Crazy as a loon. The best part of that statement is most of them will

most of them will tell you that themselves. If you like stupid stuff keep reading this.

WARNING: ARTICLES INCLUDE MALE LOCKER ROOM BANTER AND STORIES OF BODY FUNCTIONS.

The true and not so true stories from the Oxford Hunting Club.
The true and not so true stories from the Oxford Hunting Club.
true and not so true stories from the Oxford Hunting Club. We Finally Got It Right?

We Finally Got It Right?

For the past 15 years Bully and Ram have been teaming up to cook crack- lins. It’s been a big learning curve. First we learned, don’t let Ram sea- son all of the cracklins un- less you want to lose your taste buds for a week. Then we learned don’t let him count and hand out the bags. Because he uses math logic of 1 for you 2 for me. What seemed to be

our labor of love was actually a reason to sit down for 3-4 hrs. and drink beer.

actually a reason to sit down for 3-4 hrs. and drink beer. Top5PassoutPhotosandGrandPrizeWinner 5 5. Fish

Top5PassoutPhotosandGrandPrizeWinner

5
5

5.

Fish Using the classic ‘I’m thinking Pose?’

4.

Josh Using the, ‘Look at the stars technic.’

3.

Chopper Do I have

doody on my shoe pose!

2. Joe Bob I hope I

didn’t kiss Kalep prayer?

1. Johnny Somebody

check if he is breathing? Grand Prize. Brisket Ground zero for Artic Party epidemic. Don’t get close to him! I think 14 people got sick.

4
4
3
3
2
2
G 1
G
1

34

get close to him! I think 14 people got sick. 4 3 2 G 1 34

Legendary ‘DIG’ skull found in the Black Woods

The legendary Black Woods reaches out to re- mind us, with this skull. It says tred lightly when you venture my way. Few have ventured that way. Some who did vowed to never return. The ‘DIG’ skull found proves that there was the creature. The creature was part deer and part pig. A thick head beast with deer horns and deer tusk.

Oxford Hunting Club Camp Owners Association Improve Standards. The members Oxford Hunting Club has evolved

Oxford Hunting Club Camp Owners Association Improve Standards.

The members Oxford Hunting Club has evolved from from pup tents and sleeping bags on the ground at the

Old Camp to the State Park we live in today.

I thought I’d reflect on some of the

inadequate dwellings we’ve resided in. There was the drunk tank that at one time was a high class place.

I personally have resided any many

structures that made me the black sheep of residential living at the camp. There was the ‘Batcave and ‘The Crys- tal Palace’. Let’s not forget the Beverly

Hill Billies replica known as the ‘Cab- ina’. There was a time when this van that was drug to the camp to be the best dwelling at the camp because it was water proof and solid.

Holding in warmth and keeping out moisture. The Ram pointed out to me that as nice and secure as it was there were still a few cracks that allowed a snake or two inside. He had found some snake turds on his bed. He didn’t seem to be too alarmed. He pointed out to me if he put his battery operated fan on during the night, the vibration would keep the snakes away. Well I don’t know about you but I don’t think I would trust the fan tech- nique however who can go against the Ram. He’s never wrong! Just ask him. He’ll prove you wrong everytime. I’m gonna stand on the side of ‘The Ram’ because I don’t want to argue with him about why I was going against him.

want to argue with him about why I was going against him. Andy Passes on Hunting

Andy Passes on Hunting Skills and Life Lessons.

It was time to pass hunting skills over to his grand kids. Andy instructed no burping, fartin’, giggling and if you don’t kill anything I have a plan for you when we return.

(Seebelow photo for final results of the hunting trip)

I’m sorry I’m sorry We’re Sorry Pa Paw. We’ll kill something next time.
I’m sorry
I’m sorry
We’re Sorry
Pa Paw. We’ll
kill something
next time.
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Mardi Gras at the Pink House in Church Point The “Pink House” on Main Street
Mardi Gras at the
Pink House in Church Point
The “Pink House” on Main Street in Church Point,
Louisiana is where a Mardi Gras tradition first took
place in 1999. Mike Jagneaux started cooking at the
pink house for this Mardi Gras celebration to
alleviate the burden of his mother, Enola Daigle
Jagneaux, having to prepare food and clean-up for
all the family and friends that used the “Pink House”
as the Mardi Gras reunion place.
Like many families in 1968, Mike’s family miagrated
to Ascension Parish from Church Point and Port
Sulpher to work at thge Uncle Sam Plant near
Convent.
Once a year they return to Church Point to enjoy
their roots with the chasing of the chickens for gumbo
and reconnect with family and friends.
Next year visit the parade in Chuch Point and
experience South Louisiana at its best.

36

Live Entertainment • 1st, 2nd, 3rd place awards • Judged by the Jambalaya Festival Association
Live Entertainment • 1st, 2nd, 3rd place awards • Judged by the Jambalaya Festival Association
Live Entertainment • 1st, 2nd, 3rd place awards • Judged by the Jambalaya Festival Association
4th Annual
'Cooking for
a Cause'
Jambalaya
Cook-Off
Sunday April 30th to benefit
Wounded Combat Coalition, home
of Wounded Wear which
supports combat
veterans across the
United States
We need teams and sponsors.
ForMoreInformationcontactZackorKatie•Facebook.com/tigertavern
14505Highway44,Gonzales,LA70737•(225)622-3719
Please help us give back to those who have given everything.

37

Ascension Parish Finance Department Wins National Award

Ascension Parish President Kenny Matassa has announced that the Parish Finance Department has been awarded The Certificate of Achievement for Excellence in Financial Reporting for the eighth consecutive year.

“I am so proud of the accom- plishments of our Finance De- partment,” said Matassa. “This shows the Parish’s commitment to maintaining high standards in the way we handle the people’s money. I commend Gwen LeBlanc and her staff for this well-deserved award.”

The Certificate of Achievement

this well-deserved award.” The Certificate of Achievement Photo Tag Line: Front Row, Left to Right: Assistant

Photo Tag Line: Front Row, Left to Right: Assistant Treasurer Dawn Caballero, President Kenny Matassa, Treasurer and Chief Financial Officer Gwen LeBlanc, and Assistant Treasurer Amanda Berot. Back Row, Left to Right: Finance Department staff accountants Toni Ourso, Sherri Bellina, Abbey Roussel, Celeste Harris, Leslie Daigle, Val Cummins, Carol Celestin, Ashley Barnes, Lynda Timmons, and Laurie Lemoine. Not pictured are staff accountants Ann Falcon and Shelley Villar.

for Excellence in Financial Reporting is awarded by the Government Finance Officers

Association of the United States and Canada (GFOA) and is considered the highest form of

recognition in the area of governmental accounting and rfinancial reporting.

You’re Invited to Our Annual "Best Catch" Fish Fry Dear Friends, It has been a
You’re Invited to Our Annual
"Best Catch" Fish Fry
Dear Friends,
It has been a great pleasure to represent the people of District 59 in the Louisiana House of
Representatives for the past 14 months. During that time, we have had one Regular Session and
three Special Sessions, and I have done my best to be your voice in State Government every single
day since I took office.
Some of the key issues that I have fought for are balancing the budget without gimmicks, keeping K-12
schools fully funded, demanding accountability in St
ate
agencies, funding TOPS, funding Higher
Education, and improving our local roads. While I'd like to proclaim full success in each of these areas,
the truth is that there is much more work that needs to be done to make Louisiana State Government
more efficient, transparent, and responsible.
I want to continue to be on the front line, fighting for Louisiana and for District 59, as your
Representative, and to that end, I hope that you will join me for our Annual "Best Catch" Fish Fry
and Fundraiser later this month.
If you'd like to be a part of this event, please come dressed casual and ready for a good time.
The event will be at The Grand Pavilion, located at 14210 Airline Hwy, in Prairieville and will
be from 5:30-7:30 p.m. on Friday March 24th.
If you would like to participate, email your name and address to tbacala2@yahoo.com, and
I'll send you a pre-addressed and stamped envelop for you to purchase an advanced ticket.
They are $100 per couple.
As always, if you have any questions about our Annual
"Best Catch" Fish Fry or anything else, please call me on
my cell phone. The number is 225-921-3852.
Thanks,
Tony Bacala, State Representative, District 5
We’ll See You at ‘The Box’ Geaux Tigers
We’ll See You at ‘The Box’
Geaux Tigers
JOINUSANDMAKEADIFFERENCE April 29, 2017 6:00 p.m. – 12:00 a.m. Lamar Dixon Exposition Center 4-H Building,
JOINUSANDMAKEADIFFERENCE
April 29, 2017
6:00 p.m. – 12:00 a.m.
Lamar Dixon Exposition Center 4-H Building,
What is Relay For Life?
Relay For Life is the American Cancer Society’s signature
fund-raising event, bringing communities together in hope,
celebration and memory. It is a unique event that offers
everyone in the community an opportunity to participate in the
fight against cancer. The event remembers those who have lost
the fight against cancer and honors those who have survived.
businesses, clubs, families, friends, hospitals, churches, schools
and service organizations. These people share a common
purpose — their support of the American Cancer Society’s
mission. During the event, team members take turns walking on
the track setting up a tent site. Each participant is encouraged
to raise at least $100 for the American Cancer Society.
Why Relay For Life?
Who participates?
Because Relay For Life is a community event, everyone is
encouraged to participate. Teams of 10 to 15 people form from
This year, it is estimated that more than 1,500 people each day
will die from cancer. More than 1.4 million new cases of cancer
are expected to be diagnosed in 2015. Cancer is the second
leading cause of death in the United States, and one of every
three deaths is from cancer. In the United States, men have a

40

one in two lifetime risk of developing cancer; for women the risk is one in three. Relay For Life represents the hope that those lost to cancer will never be forgotten, that those who face cancer will be supported and that one day cancer will be eliminated.

Our Mission

The American Cancer Society is the nationwide, community-based, voluntary health organization dedicated to eliminating cancer as a major health problem by preventing cancer, saving lives and diminishing suffering from cancer, through research, education, advocacy and service.

For more information:

Lexie Grush – Community Manager, Relay For Life – 985-788-7982

Or call your American Cancer Society at 1-800-ACS-2345 for information 24 hours any day.

American Cancer Society Baton Rouge Office 10528 Kentshire Ct., Baton Rouge, LA 70810 (phone) 225-927-0782 (fax) 225-767-1374 Cancer Information: 1.800.ACS.2345, www.cancer.org

Ct., Baton Rouge, LA 70810 (phone) 225-927-0782 (fax) 225-767-1374 Cancer Information: 1.800.ACS.2345, www.cancer.org
Ct., Baton Rouge, LA 70810 (phone) 225-927-0782 (fax) 225-767-1374 Cancer Information: 1.800.ACS.2345, www.cancer.org
Ct., Baton Rouge, LA 70810 (phone) 225-927-0782 (fax) 225-767-1374 Cancer Information: 1.800.ACS.2345, www.cancer.org
Ct., Baton Rouge, LA 70810 (phone) 225-927-0782 (fax) 225-767-1374 Cancer Information: 1.800.ACS.2345, www.cancer.org
Ct., Baton Rouge, LA 70810 (phone) 225-927-0782 (fax) 225-767-1374 Cancer Information: 1.800.ACS.2345, www.cancer.org

EAST ASCENSION SOFTBALL 2017

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ST. AMANT SOFTBALL 2017

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DUTCHTOWN SOFTBALL 2017

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Cooking Gourmet at Home

with SNO’S SEAFOOD & STEAKS

Cooking Gourmet at Home with SNO’S SEAFOOD & STEAKS “After the Boil” Deviled Eggs Chef General

“After the Boil” Deviled Eggs

Chef General Manager Ben Jarreau
Chef
General Manager
Ben Jarreau

Yield: 12

Prep: 15 minutes

Cook: 20 minutes

Serving: 6

Ingredients:

6

eggs (hard boiled)

¼

cup mayonnaise

¼

to ½ lb peeled boiled crawfish tails

¼

cup green onions (thinly sliced)

2

boiled red potatoes (mashed)

1

tablespoon Creole mustard

1

teaspoon dry crab boil mix

Salt & Pepper to taste

1 or 2 corn cobs (cut corn off of the cob)

Method:

Peel all of your boiled eggs. Cut them in half length ways and carefully remove the yolks. Place all the yolks in a mixing bowl and add your mayo, mustard and green onions. Be sure that before adding your corn and potatoes that you chop and mash them as much as possible to ensure proper mixture. Finally, rough chop your crawfish tails and add to mixture. Salt and pepper the mixture to taste. Using a piping bag or spoon add the mixture back into the boiled egg halves. Sprinkle with dry crab boil and serve.

ENJOY!!!!!!

piping bag or spoon add the mixture back into the boiled egg halves. Sprinkle with dry

45

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