Tattoo Tribulations

One of the greatest life lessons I learned from thewise teacher (ie, my bartender) was
this: “Never allow stranger bearing sharp implements to modify your body.” Wise advice
indeed. Consider thefollowing true story, which concerns a UK tattooist who we shall Mr
Luk, sincewe don’t know his real name, and a costumer that we shallcall Mr Becks, since that
was his name. Mr Becks asked to have the Chinese characters for “love, honour and obey”
etched permanently onto his large arm muscles.

Shortly afterwards, Mr Becks was buying UK-style Chinese “food” (that’s what they
call; you and i know better) when he noticed his arm was being avidly readby a laughing staff
member. Blushing, she told him that the Chinese characters says: “at the end of the day, this is
an ugly boy.” The next day, Mr Becks storm back to the tatoo parlour. But it and Mr Luk aws
vanished.

There are a few theories about what happened. One says Mr Luk decided to liven upa
prank. Another say he played a prank and then realised it would be wise to make a quick exit.
A third theory, my own, says Mr Luk is travelling the world, writing a book, line by line, on
different inviduals. He may be adding the next line to someone else’s biceps right now: “and
not just ugly, but gulliable, too”

The details were given to me by Hong Kong reader Paul Fox, and inspired me to ask
for other true stories about tattoo. I learned taht Mr Becks’ experience a lot. Every day of the
year, hundreds of tourists go to shops selling tattoos or carved stoned seals in Hong Kong,
Singapore, Beijing, Taipei, etc, and have the following conversation. Tourists: “ can you
carved y name in Chinese characters?” What the tattooist thinks: “ Of course not, Chinese are
words not letters.” What the tattooist says: “of course, that will be $200”

Otis, a reader from Philiphines, proposes a new use for tattoos. A famous turf war has
been running for decades between two Bangkok corpse collection agencies. “They can
simply devide the city’s population between them at birth, and tattoo the baby’s bottom to
show ownership” he said. “They can send cards regularly to their citizens, saying: ‘Happy
birthday. Only 70 more years to go on average’”

Police who arrested Kennedy for assault noticed that he had a sentence tattooed on his forehead: “Please forgive if I say or do anything stupid” Dumb criminal? The man’s a genius. Here endeth the column: “ Please forgive me if i write anything stupid. The next time your wife finds you drunk in a bar in the wrong part of the town. is likely to say and do some incredibly dumb things?” I may be add it as a permanent disclaimer.” Adapted from Reader’s Digest October 2013 . one who gathers tales for my “dumb criminals” file. Think of the hours of explaining it would save. it could be usefully be incoperated into the wedding vows. Every man i the world should copy this idea. sent me a cutting about Robert Norton Kenedy. in full knowledge taht he. from South Carolina in the US. being male. Another reader. “Do you take this man as yoy lawfully wedded husband. you just point to your head and say: “see?” Indeed. 51.

Which of the statement is true? a) Mr Luk is a tattooist that travel a lot b) The writer suggests all man should get their forehead tattooed c) Many tattooist put pranks on their costumer by tattooing their costumer not the way they wanted 3. Kenedy was arrrested because a) He tattooed his forehead b) He did the crime of attack c) He was humiliating the police d) His wife found him drunk in the wrong part of the town .Questions and answer 1. obey” 2. but gulliable too” b) His name c) “at the end of the day. What was tattooed on Mr. honour. Becks’ arm? a) “and not just ugly. The writer collect stories about tattoo to make a book a) True b) False c) Not stated 4. Why do babies need to get tattooed during the turf war? a) To separate the baby from the parents at birth b) To follow the trend c) To marked the babies as their workers until they were 70 d) To show ownership 5. this is an ugly boy” d) “love.