Improving your Writing Task 2

(guidance, tips, examples)

The three different types of IELTS essay question

The first rule of IELTS essays is to answer the question. One problem in doing that is there
are different types of IELTS essay questions each of which poses its own problems. Let us see
the three main types of essay questions, how to identify them and what problems they pose.

1. The discussion
Here you are given a social issue or problem and asked directly to discuss it and very often
asked to suggest a solution for it.

Two examples
In this type of question you are given the problem (here in red) and then told how to discuss
it/your task (in blue).

In many countries schools have severe problems with student behaviour. What do you think
are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

and

Many universities charge higher fees for foreign students. Why do they do this? Do you
believe that it is fair?

Typical task words

Why do they think that?

What solutions can you suggest?

Typical problems
There are 2 typical problems with understanding this type of essay question.

1. You are being asked for your personal opinion: it is not enough to talk generally about
the topic. You must give your personal view.

2. Very often you given two tasks: for example, to discuss the causes and the solution. If
you discuss only one of these, you will be penalised on Task Achievement.

3. The question does not give you much help with ideas: you may need to spend more
time planning and thinking of ideas
2. The proposal
Here you are given an opinion about some social issue to discuss. Typically, you are asked
whether or to what extent you agree with it.

Two examples
In this type of question you are given an opinion (in red) and then told how to discuss it/your
task (in blue). Sometimes the question is longer and you are given some background
information (in green), then the opinion and then the task.

Fatherhood ought to be emphasized as much as motherhood. The idea that women are solely
responsible for deciding whether or not to have babies leads on to the idea that they are also
responsible for bringing the children up. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

and

Currently there is a trend towards the use of alternative forms of medicine. However, at best
these methods are ineffective, and at worst they may be dangerous. To what extent do you
agree or disagree?

Typical task words

What is you opinion?

Do you agree that

To what extent do you agree?

Discuss

Typical problems
There are three typical problems with understanding this type of essay question:

1. The questions are simply longer to read and sometimes harder to understand. Spend
plenty of time reading the question and underlining the key words and making sure
you understand what words like this and these refer to.

2. It can be easy to confuse the background information from the opinion. You must
discuss the opinion (the bit in red). If you only discuss the topic (the bit in green), you
will be penalised on Task Achievement.

3. You need to discuss the opinion in the question. You cannot only give your opinion.

3. The argument
Here you are given a problem or issue and two different solutions or opinions about it.
Typically, you are then asked to decide which solution/opinion is the better.

Two examples
The argument type essay question has two main types. In the first type, you get two different
situations or opinions (red) and then your task (in blue) is to decide between them.

In some countries people pay different rates of tax depending on their salary, in other
countries everyone pays the same rate. Which do you believe is the best system?

In the second type, you get a solution (in red) to a situation (in green) and you then your task
(in blue) is to discuss the advantages and disadvantages of that solution.

Unemployment is one of the most serious problems facing developed nations today. What are
the advantages and/or disadvantages of reducing the working week to thirty five hours?

Typical task words

What are the advantages and disadvantages of this

Typical problems
There are two typical problems here:

1. The essay discusses the problem generally and doesnt talk about advantages or
disadvantages or make a choice between the two options. Again this will be penalised
under Task Achievement.

2. The essay only looks at the advantages or the disadvantages. It needs to look at both
sides of the question.

Other question types

You may well find questions that could fall into two different categories. That is not so
important. What really matters is learning to look at each question and deciding what
precisely it is asking you to do and what possible problems it poses.

A checklist
This is a very simple checklist to help you decide which type of question you are looking at:

1. Does it ask me what my own opinion is about a topic? Discussion question Use my
own opinions

2. Does it ask me to discuss a particular proposal? Proposal question Discuss that

proposal
3. Does it ask me to decide between two different opinions or look at the advantages and
disadvantages of a topic Argument question Discuss both sides and come to a decision

An exercise

Look at these reported recent IELTS questions and decide which type of essay you need to
write:

1. Many people have an unhealthy diet and do not take enough exercise. What do you
think are the reasons for this and what can be done to encourage people to lead a more
healthy lifestyle?

2. Although countries with long average working hours are economically successful, this
often has some negative social consequences. To what extent do you agree or
disagree?

3. Some people think that paying taxes is enough to contribute to society. Others argue
that being a citizen involves more responsibilities. Discuss.

4. Many people argue that children should stay in school until the age of eighteen. What
are the advantages and disadvantages of making school compulsory until the age of
18?

5. Many people nowadays leave their country to work abroad and take their family with
them. What are the advantages and disadvantages in terms of family development?

Paragraph coherence
One form of coherence is coherence within a paragraph. To achieve this you need to learn
how to structure a paragraph with a topic sentence and to develop that sentence through the
appropriate use of explanations and examples. In this post I am going to suggest a possible
model to help you do this by teaching you to PEE something everyone should be able to do
quite naturally. It may help, however, first to think about how this works in the reading and
speaking papers.
Understanding paragraph coherence topic sentences think reading
In the IELTS reading exam, one very familiar task is to identify the main topic of a paragraph
by selecting the correct heading from a list. One way to complete that task is to identify one
sentence that gives the main point of the paragraph this is the topic sentence. Your goal in
the writing paper is to ensure that each of your paragraphs contains a similar topic sentence.
Learn how to write by thinking about reading.
Paragraph coherence expanding the topic think speaking
You can also learn to write by thinking about speaking. In the speaking exam, one of the goals
is not to give very brief answers, but to give extended answers. In the writing the same
applies: it is important to expand on the topic to show you have sufficient vocabulary and
grammar to say what you want. The mistake is to write very short paragraphs or paragraphs
which contain unrelated points. If you dont believe me, you should note that the question
almost invariably contains these words:
You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with
examples and relevant evidence.

This is telling you that coherence is important. If you do support what you say with evidence
and examples, your writing will become coherent.
A model Learn how to P-E-E
One way to expand your topic sentences is to
make the point (P)
explain it (E)
give an example (E)
How it works
This is not the only way to be coherent, but it is a good model to folllow in the context of an
exam essay for two reasons. Firstly, it impresses the examiner. It also makes the writing
easier as most paragraphs can follow the same pattern and planning becomes much easier as
you already know the shape of each paragraph before you start writing.
Some examples
Read through these three paragraphs taken from different IELTS essays and note how they all have a
similar structure:

Point

Explanation

Example

This is a pattern you can follow in most essays to give coherence to your writing by expanding on one
point. I will add that this just a model guideline, it isnt a rule. There will be times when you do not use
examples for instance.

There are those who argue that the internet has had an extremely positive influence on
communication. They say this because in the past it was sometimes impossible to call people in other
countries on the telephone, but now it is relatively simple to use a program such as Skype to talk to
them for free or to send an email. A good example here are the students who go to study abroad and
are able to send messages home with no difficulty, when in past they would have had to buy stamps
and go to the post office which was much harder and more expensive.
A strong argument can of course be made from the opposite position. Part of this argument is
that countries and nations need to preserve old buildings in order to preserve their heritage. In
addition, however, to this cultural argument, there are positive economic benefits in
preserving old buildings. An illustration here is Egypt once again, a country which depends
on tourism for much of its national income simply because visitors pay to come from other
countries to visit its ancient sites. There are several reasons why it can be argued that
television has a negative effect on cultural development. Perhaps the principle argument is the
lowbrow nature of many programmes, particularly sitcoms and soap operas. People who
watch these programmes do not learn anything, they are simply entertained. The other
major argument is that because people watch so much television, they no longer
take part in more traditional forms of cultural entertainment. An example here is
how traditional dancing and music is becoming much less popular because
people are staying at home to watch the television.
IELTS essays essay coherence 1
Coherence is an important part of the essay writing process in IELTS. In this lesson I look
briefly at how it works and how you can use it to impress the examiner by analysing a sample
essay. But coherence is not just a boring way to impress the IELTS examiner, it can also make
your essay easier to write and that must be something worth learning.

What is coherence?
A difficult question with any amount of possible answers. My own answer is that if cohesion
is about connecting words, then coherence is about connecting ideas. Put another way, a
coherent piece of writing is one where the reader understands why each point has been
included and never has to stop and think Why did the writer put that bit there?. Everything
flows.
IELTS coherence: make it explicit
Its a fact of life that IELTS examiners do not spend too much time marking an IELTS essay
they are not paid by the minute! Therefore and this is a logical connection it only makes
sense to make it easy for them to see that you are being coherent. My personal advice is to
give them something to tick: show them clearly that you are being coherent dont try and be
clever.
How to make your essay coherent a demonstration
One way to achieve coherence is to focus on openings. The openings of paragraphs (and
sentences) need to connect with something that has come before. If there is no connection, the
reader will have to stop and think to work out what the writer is thinking. If that happens, the
flow of the writing will be lost and coherence will be damaged.
Here is a demonstration of what I mean. Look at the connections in my last paragraph:
One way to achieve coherence is to focus on openings. The openings of paragraphs (and
sentences) need to connect with something that has come before. If there is no connection, the
reader will have to stop and think to work out what the writer is thinking. If that happens, the
flow of the writing will be lost and coherence will be damaged.
Each sentence opening reflects language from the previous sentence so each sentence flows
easily into the next. More than that, there is strong connection between the topics of each
sentence: they all relate to coherence.

A sample essay coherence between paragraphs

Read through this sample essay and note how each paragraph is explicitly connected to
previous paragraphs so that the reader can easily identify the progression of the argument.

Subjects such as Art, Sport and Music are being dropped from the school
curriculum for subjects such as Information Technology. Many people children
suffer as a result of these changes. To what extent would you support or reject the
idea of moving these subjects from school curriculum?

In recent times there has much debate about which subjects should be included on the
school curriculum. One particular issue is whether the introduction of more modern
subjects such as IT for more traditional subjects such as art and music disadvantages
the pupils. This essay examines both sides of this issue.
There is one major argument in favour of replacing art, music and sport on the
curriculum with subjects like IT. This is that the purpose of school is to prepare children
for their working life after school, so the subjects on the curriculum should be relevant to
their potential careers. From this point of view, IT is much relevant to schoolchildren as
they need to be computer literate if they want to survive in the workplace. For example, it
is easy to see that word processing and programming skills will impress employers more
than the ability to run fast or draw well.

There are also, however, strong arguments for retaining the more traditional subjects as
part of the curriculum. One significant counter-argument is that the purpose of education
is not just to prepare children for later careers, but also to develop their all round
culture. It is important that children leave school with some knowledge of art, music and
sport as all these are all help develop aspects of young peoples personalities.

My own personal point of view is that there is merit in both sides of the debate and that
all children should study some IT, art music and sport at least at primary school. At
secondary school, however, children should be offered a choice between these subjects
so that they can continue to study them if they wish. In this way, no child will be
disadvantaged.

Explanation
Each paragraph contains red language right at its start to show the reader what is going to
happen in that paragraph. Anyone reading the essay no matter how quickly is going to see
that it is structured.
The two content paragraphs contain similar blue language to emphasise the balance of the
argument. Paragraph 3 relates to and answers paragraph 2.

The green language of the conclusion relates to and answers the green language of the
introduction

Coherence makes writing easier

As I mentioned in the introduction, learning coherence can make the essay writing process
easier. This is because in a 4 paragraph argument essay:

paragraph 3 borrows and reflects the language of paragraph 2

the conclusion borrows and reflects the language of the introduction

What you are doing is repeating language intelligently with the result that you have less to
write. The skill is to discover ways of varying the language so that it is not simple repetition.
In the sample essay strong argument reflects major argument, pupils "children and so
on. With a little practice its surprisingly simple to do.
Paragraph coherence: linking words
This lesson looks at one simple way to write a good paragraph for IELTS. And the key is
simplicity: its as easy as 1 2 3. When you have a list of points to make, Id suggest the best
way to do it is to count the points. Firstly, I give you some useful language. Secondly, I
explain why it is useful. Finally, I show you how to use it in two sample paragraphs from
recent IELTS papers.

Useful linking language

Here is some suggested language:

one point/argument/reason/idea is

an additional point/argument/reason/idea is

another point/argument/reason/idea is

again,

firstly/secondly/thirdly

finally

Isnt this too simple? Shouldnt I use moreover and furthermore

The short answer to that is no. Perhaps the best reason to give is that this is the language I use
myself and I like to teach the language I use. I dont use moreover and furthermore The
second reason is that in the IELTS exam you want to keep your structure language simple. Its
a sad truth that too many candidates make mistakes in using moreover and furthermore.

I want to emphasise that one real benefit to using this method is that it makes writing easier.
Once you have written: One reason.., you know that you are going to begin your next
sentence Another reason. Your writing automatically becomes more coherent..

Three examples
This technique works particularly well in questions such as this recent IELTS writing topic
where you are asked to discuss a plural topic: responsibilities.

Some people think that paying taxes is enough to contribute to society. Others argue that
being a citizen involves more responsibilities. What is your opinion?

If you are a strong candidate, you might choose to write a 4-paragraph essay with one
paragraph discussing paying tax and the other content paragraph discussing other
responsibilities. Here is my version:

There are, however, various other responsibilities we owe our society. One is that young
people should either do military service or some community work before starting their
careers. A second is that in some countries citizens do not just have the right to vote but they
are in fact obliged to vote by law. Again, it is arguable that the better off within a society
ought to provide for the underprivileged through charity work.
This technique is also of use in essays where you are asked to discuss the advantages and
disadvantages of an issue. Here is another recent IELTS topic:

Some people working abroad bring their family to live with them for a period of time. Do you
think it has more advantages or disadvantages?

Here is my sample paragraph discussing the disadvantages:

Perhaps the most significant disadvantage is cost. Typically, it will be more expensive for
people working abroad to support their families in the host country where the cost of living is
higher. Another disadvantage is that the childrens education may be disrupted if they need to
go to school in another country. Thirdly, it may be extremely difficult for the family to
integrate if they are unable to speak the language.

The third example comes from the sample essay on compulsory education.

There are, however, equally strong arguments against making school compulsory until the age
of 18. One such argument is that not everyone is academic and that some people benefit more
from vocational training. For instance, someone who wants to become a car mechanic may
find better training and more satisfaction in an apprentice scheme. Another related argument
is that, in todays world, young people are maturing ever more quickly and are able to make
their own life decisions by the age of 16.

Notes

1. Each of my paragraphs starts with a short simple sentence: this is an extremely good habit to get into.

2. You may find yourself repeating certain words such as argument: this is in fact a good thing as it
helps the coherence of your writing. It is not always correct to vary your vocabulary.

3. There is some flexibility in how you can combine these connecting words

4. Each of paragraphs contains 2/3 points. Id suggest that that is about right if you are going to try this
technique.

Everyone should stay in school until the age of eighteen. To what extent do you agree or
disagree?
It is often said that if you want to succeed in life, you need a proper education. I would agree
with this, but it is debatable whether a proper education means having to stay in school until
you are 18.

Perhaps the strongest reason not leaving school early is that it prepares you for your working
career. If you leave school early with only a basic education, you are unlikely to be able to
find any skilled work. Indeed, the education you receive between the ages of 16 and 18 is
crucial for anyone who does not want a lifetime of unskilled work in a factory. Another
compelling reason for remaining in school until 18 is that school provides moral and social
education too. This is particularly important for people between 16 and 18 who have many
temptations and benefit from the organised framework that school provides. Young people
who stay in school until the age of 18 tend to be more responsible and help build a stronger
society.

There are, however, equally strong arguments against making school compulsory until the age
of 18. One such argument is that not everyone is academic and that some people benefit more
from vocational training. For instance, someone who wants to become a car mechanic may
find better training and more satisfaction in an apprentice scheme. Another related argument
is that, in todays world, young people are maturing ever more quickly and are able to make
their own life decisions by the age of 16.

To my mind, everyone should be encouraged to stay in school until 18. However, I believe it
would be a mistake to make this compulsory.

4 ways to make your paragraphs coherent

How can you make your IELTS essay more coherent and cohesive? This is a question that
matters, particularly if you are after a band score of more than 6.0. Coherence and cohesion
are two writing skills that may seem theoretical, but in fact can have a dramatic and very
practical effect on your writing. This post shows with how you can improve your writing by
following 4 simple tips.
Tips
Here are some straightforward tips nothing too complex here at all.

1. Think about how you start each sentence

2. Try using connecting phrases and not simple words

3. Consider how you can use vocabulary

4. Think in paragraphs

A learner example
Here is a sample paragraph from a student essay on
People who dont know how to work with computers would be disadvantaged. Do you agree
or not?

Secondly, computers play a vital role in education. All academic books are generated
electronically. Students are learning their subjects only through computers. Computers are
also useful for them to present their projects to their peers and professors. Students progress
can be tracked through computers.

Commentary
In some ways it is not too bad at all. I have corrected one or two grammatical errors, but there
werent that many in the first place. Again, there is a reasonable range of vocabulary and some
good collocations: academic books present projects peers and professors track
progress. But, there is a but. The writing doesnt flow at all: it doesnt really read like a
paragraph, more like a group of unconnected sentences.

An improved version
Now take a look at my improved version: using as much of the original as possible:
It is also possible to claim that information technology is playing an increasingly vital role in
education. One way this happens is that more and more academic books are generated
electronically and in consequence many students are using computers to study. An additional
point is that computer technology is frequently used by students to make presentations both to
their peers and professors. Indeed, it is probably true to say that most courses at university
require some level of computer literacy.

What have I done to improve it? Actually there is surprisingly little. Taking my tips in turn
lets analyse the differences.

Openings of sentences: phrases not words

The first thing I did was to concentrate on the openings of the sentences. These matter
because they provide the link between one sentence and the next. You should see that the red
language is what I call structural language and with appropriate variations can be used from
essay to essay.

The other point to note is that I am using phrases and not single words to provide the links.
The example here is Secondly in the original is replaced by It is also possible to claim
that.
It is also possible to claim that information technology is playing an increasingly vital role in
education. One way this happens is that more and more academic books are generated
electronically and in consequence many students are using computers to study. An additional
point is that computer technology is frequently used by students to make presentations both to
their peers and professors. Indeed, it is probably true to say that most courses at university
require some level of computer literacy.
Vocabulary
The next point on my list is to consider vocabulary. In the original see how often the word
computers is repeated:
Secondly, computers play a vital role in education. All academic books are generated
electronically. Students are learning their subjects only through computers. Computers are
also useful for them to present their projects to their peers and professors. Students progress
can be tracked through computers.
 This repetition does not work: it makes each sentence seem as if it has no connection to the
one that came before: there are 4 sentences each about computers. In my variation I have tried
to vary the language by using synonyms. The subject remains the same, but now the language
develops.

It is also possible to claim that information technology is playing an increasingly vital role in
education. One way this happens is that more and more academic books are generated
electronically and in consequence many students are using computers to study. An additional
point is that computer technology is frequently used by students to make presentations both to
their peers and professors. Indeed, it is probably true to say that most courses at university
require some level of computer literacy.

Paragraphs are wholes: not lists

The final step is to think of the paragraph as a whole in the same way as you look at an
essay as a whole: something with a beginning, middle and end. In the original the final
sentence was not connected to the previous sentences, it was just one more point in a list. In
my version, however, it forms a conclusion, by summarising the previous points. One way to
do this is to refer back to your first sentence:

It is also possible to claim that information technology is playing an increasingly vital role in
education. One way this happens is that more and more academic books are generated
electronically and in consequence many students are using computers to study. An additional
point is that computer technology is frequently used by students to make presentations both to
their peers and professors. Indeed, it is probably true to say that most courses at university
require some level of computer literacy