Lindsay Amarel 03-2317 FHS 2400 Marriage and Family U5E1: Good Parenting

Question:

Based on your life experiences, what makes a good parent? What makes a bad parent? Does
your definition of what makes a good or bad parent change depending on the age of the child?
Should our parenting styles or techniques change as our children get older or should they stay the
same? Explain. In your family of orientation, what child-rearing attitudes (authoritarian,
permissive, or authoritative) predominated? What impact did your parents child-rearing attitudes
have on you? Interview either one or both of your parents. If you do not have access to your
parents, interview the parents of a close friend or relative. Ask them to describe their greatest
joys and challenges as a parent. If they had to do it again, what would they do differently? What
would they do the same?

Answer: 596 words

What makes a good parent? I feel as though this is a very broad question due to the fact

that many things factor in to the opinions of others, and nobody has the exact same parenting

styles as others. From my experience, I feel as though I could answer that question pretty well.

My life situation was unlike a lot of other peoples. When I was really young, we started out by

my parents both working full-time jobs, and I would go to my Grandmas house and play and

what not until they got home. When I was about 5 or 6 years old, my dad got sick unexpectedly,

which caused a lot of surgeries and eventually disability. He wasnt able to work from that time

on. My mom has since been the only economic provider in our home, which has made things

really hard in some ways.

My mom and I have a really great relationship. I could say she is one of my very best

friends. This may be due to the fact that we share the same religious beliefs, same interests, and

some of the same life experiences. Whereas with my dad, we don't get along so well for the

opposite of those same reasons. I dont necessarily believe that having a good/bad relationship

with one parent or another makes them less of a good parent. It does make it harder to feel that

way about my dad as I have gotten older, but I have come to that realization.
Lindsay Amarel 03-2317 FHS 2400 Marriage and Family U5E1: Good Parenting

I think parenting styles do tend to change as our culture and the world around us change.

It gets harder to be old fashioned when the things the kids are learning these days are irrelevant

to most of the ways we were taught as a child. I believe in my household, my parents both had

their own ways or parenting. My dad was always more authoritarian, meaning there was always

a strict need for obedience, while my mom was more permissive, meaning she was a lot more

lenient when it came to a lot of things (Strong & Cohen, 2014, pg. 373). This making it difficult

to some to family agreements sometimes.

While interviewing my parents, they explained to me that the best part of being a parent

was to watch us grow up and become who we ultimately wanted to be. Although it was hard and

a large challenge, they got through it and were able to enjoy the time we had together when we

were all kids. If they had to do it all over again, they would have liked to be in a better financial

situation to better relish our needs and also our wants. That is obviously a situation that was

given to them without choosing, but it makes sense that they would feel a desire to change that.

They talked a lot about the way we were disciplined as well. I thought it was good. They werent

too harsh with the punishments, but they definitely helped us learn our lesson to change our

ways. Looking back at that, It sure was a blessing.

In all truth, for me, if you can make your child happy while securing a positive future for

them, youre doing pretty well at being a parent. I dont think there is a clear-cut answer either

way, but feeling comfortable and happy with both of my parents is one of the greatest blessings

that I can cherish for a lifetime, which I hope to be able to show my future children as well.

References:

Strong, B., & Cohen, T.F. (2014). The Marriage and Family Experience: Intimate Relationships
Lindsay Amarel 03-2317 FHS 2400 Marriage and Family U5E1: Good Parenting

in a Changing Society (12th ed.). Belmont, CA: Wadsworth, Cengage Learning.