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Welcome to the Attractive Introvert Formula!

Why This Program?
Overcome nervousness and awkwardness around

Where and how to meet girls!

How to have attractive conversations instead of just

friendly ones!

Build comfort once shes attracted and lead it to sex!

Get a girlfriend (if thats what you want)

Who This Is For
Designed especially for guys who have had little to
no experience before. Many taking this program
have never kissed a girl before.!

Not promising overnight results, but I will show

you the step-by-step PATH to going from where
you are to where you want to be. It will take
action. You will have to TRY if you havent before.!

Guys who have had a girlfriend before will get even

better and faster results.
Program Outline

Begins with big picture ideas, mindsets and

strategies. Later focus more on techniques for
specific situations and what to say.!
How do I attract her? Module 2

What do I say? Module 3

How do I meet women? Module 4

How do I sleep with her?!

(How do I get a girlfriend?) Module 5
A Bit About Me
Social anxiety growing up. No friends and a total
lack of confidence. Overcame issues through
exposure and inner mindset shifts.!

Created The Shyness And Social Anxiety System to

teach others!

Dropped out of university because it was boring.

Decided to go for a more unconventional life
creating different internet businesses and traveling.
Went to Southeast Asia for 6 months about a year
ago and plan to travel again soon.
A Bit About Me
Can relate to your situation.!

Virgin until I was 21 years old. Totally ignored by the

opposite sex because I was so quiet and
unconfident. Very insecure and anxious around

Figured out how to turn it around and have had very

good results with girls since. And its improving all
the time. Theres a formula to creating a romantic
relationship with a girl - casual or committed.
How This Will Be Taught

Casual teaching environment. Ill pretend youre a

friend of mine who doesnt have much experience
with women where I was 1.5 years ago.!

Building each new week based on feedback from

you to make sure I solve your problems.!

Lets begin!
Inferiority: The Cause
Of Failure With Women
Core Beliefs
What causes nervousness, awkwardness, lack of

First big insight is that these feelings are always

situational - you feel them only in certain situations
or around certain people.!

Fat girl syndrome - do you feel nearly as nervous

talking to an unattractive girl? Probably not. Why?
Your Value
In your mind, you have an idea of how valuable you
think you are compared to other people.!

If you think the other person is more valuable, then

you feel nervous and self-conscious around them. !

You start being more careful to make them like you.

Ex: Filtering what you say (which makes you run out
of things to say), speaking more quietly, etc.
Your Subconscious Beliefs

Most shy guys wont admit they think some bimbo

attractive girl is superior to them, but if you look at
your behaviour you will see the truth.!

Your behaviour around people will reveal your

REAL subconscious beliefs to you. Beliefs about
yourself, about how valuable other people are
compared to you, etc.
Do you have trouble talking to or even maintaining eye
contact with a girl you like?!

Do you have trouble keeping a conversation going and

not running out of things to say when she's around?!

Do you get anxious or self-conscious whenever she is


Do you try to make her like you by bragging, acting

different than usual, etc?!

(All of these outer behaviors are symptoms of feeling like

the girl is superior to you. You may also feel this way
around authority figures, popular or successful people)
The Basic Belief That Causes
Nervousness And Kills Attraction:

Attractive Girl

Inferiority Is Bad
If you feel you are somehow "less valuable" than
the girl, then you will feel shy, nervous and awkward
around her.!

When the girl can tell that you think she is more
valuable than you, then she will never get attracted.!

Because what girls are attracted to are mostly

behavioral signs of status. Women are WIRED to
pick up on this. They can tell when you feel inferior
vs. when you feel deserving of them.
Inferiority Is Bad

When you believe that the girl is superior to you,

then there's going to be little "signals" in your
behavior that communicate this belief to her. !

Everything from your eye contact, your voice, not

knowing what to say, being afraid to show your
romantic interest in her, and a hundred other little
things Ill outline for you in this program.
Inferiority Is Bad
This is at the CORE of the majority of your issues
with girls. Inferiority is what stops you from being
able to talk to her normally and naturally. It stops
you from being able to flirt with her and make her
attracted to you.!

Stops you from feeling like you DESERVE to go up

and talk to her, to date her and to have her as a
girlfriend. Believing she is higher value than you is
what causes that paralyzing fear.
The Goal: Feeling Equal
When you feel like the girl is your equal, then its
100x easier to talk to her in a comfortable and
relaxed way, and to not feel awkward.!

Building the foundation here.!

Next video talks about how your insecurities and

shame cause this feeling of inferiority, and how
to get out of it
Insecurity And Shame:
The 2 Barriers
How I Used To
Approach Girls
See a girl, get really nervous, procrastinate, try to
think of what to say Friend pushes me to go.
Finally walk up to her feeling bad and awkward
inside and speaking to quietly. Bomb and get
rejected over and over again.!

Back then I had many insecurities: Didnt like my

appearance, paranoid about people finding out I
was a loner and a loser, etc. Thought that my
appearance was causing my lack of success.
Why People Get Turned Off

Im sure you can relate. Maybe not rejected by hot

girl, but you felt at many times in your life unwanted
and forgotten. Like nobody makes an effort to get to
know you. Sitting alone in class.!

Why dont people like you? Why did I keep getting

rejected by girls in bars?
The Power Of Assumptions
Our assumptions or predictions of what is going to
happen in social situations usually come true. What
do I mean by this? !

If you assume youll be accepted, then you usually

will. And if you predict that youll get disapproval or
rejection, then you also usually will.!

The key to making people like you is assuming

they will like you. Sounds like a paradox, but its
Assuming Acceptance
If I had assumed that the girl would be attracted to me, or at least
that she would be friendly then how would I have acted

Well, I probably wouldnt have waited around before talking to her.

If I had assumed she would accept me, then I probably would
have simply walked over in a relaxed way, and said the first thing
that popped into my head. And then the conversation would have
gone from there.!

Ive approached plenty of other girls since then, and the biggest
thing that determined whether they accepted or rejected me was
my own behavior and my assumption of their acceptance. My
appearance barely changed.
Assuming Acceptance
You are always unconsciously broadcasting your
inner beliefs to the people around you. Through
your behaviour from the way you make eye
contact, to your posture, to the tone of your voice, to
how open you feel to express your real personality
and humor.!

People pick up on these signs or cues in your

behaviour. And this determines how they usually
respond to you.
Assuming Acceptance
So if you walk up to someone confident and relaxed,
with an assumption of acceptance, then that
communicates a lot about you. It communicates that: !

you probably have a group of people who already

accept you. !

you consider yourself valuable and worth getting to

know. !

you believe you have something to offer this person.

Versus Assuming Rejection
On the other hand, if you walk up to someone nervous
and insecure, then what does that communicate? Well,
probably most people dont like you otherwise why
would you be so scared? You probably dont have a lot to
offer maybe youre trying to get something from this
person or trick them. And you probably dont consider
yourself valuable.!

And if people can see through your lack of confidence

that YOU yourself dont think you are valuable, then why
should they think you are valuable? (After all, who knows
you better than you know yourself?)
Insecurity And Assumptions

Shyness and social anxiety is usually an

assumption of disapproval. Feelings of nervousness
and anxiety before talking to a girl reveal your belief
that you will probably get rejected.!

Assumption of Disapproval: The feeling like

people wont like you for some reason. Or believing
that the real you is unacceptable. Feeling like you
need to hide parts of yourself to get acceptance.
Why are you afraid to talk to that girl or guy you like? The fear
comes from a prediction that they will reject you. If you really
believed, deep down, that you two would have a great
conversation, then why would you be afraid?!

Why do you find it so difficult to hold conversations, especially

with people you dont know well? The biggest thing that kills you
and makes you run out of things to say is thinking you need to
say some super-interesting thing. You assume they will
disapprove of you unless you perform for them.!

Why is it hard for people with social anxiety to form close

friendships or relationships? Well, since you cant easily relax
around someone and put your real self out there until you have
known them for a long time, it becomes very difficult to connect.
The reason why you have this fear of vulnerability is because
you unconsciously assume people wouldnt like the real you.
Common Insecurities
Appearance: Maybe you think you are too ugly. Or too tall or
short. Too skinny or fat. Maybe your teeth are crooked or your
nose is too big. Maybe your penis or breasts are too small.!

Lifestyle: Or maybe you have no social life and try to hide it from
people. Maybe you think your lifestyle is boring and uninteresting.
Maybe you believe that, because youre a loner or a virgin, that
means that people simply wont like you.!

Self: Or maybe your anxiety and shyness itself is what you feel
insecure about. Whenever you start feeling nervous, you try to
hide it from people. You dont want anyone to notice when your
heart starts beating faster, or when youre sweating, shaking, or
Finding Your Insecurity
Toxic Shame: Belief that youre unworthy of love. Often
caused by bullying at a young age or parental
abandonment experiences. (Ex: My parents were working
in business 6 days a week while I was growing up.)!

People who fear rejection usually act as if they have some

deep dark secret that would mean instant loneliness if it
were discovered. - Jonathan Berent!

Heres an important question I ask most of my clients:

What is the thing you are the most worried about
people noticing or finding out about youthat would
lead them to reject you?
People Hate Your Feeling Of
Insecurity, Not The Thing You Are
Insecure About Itself
People usually dont mind your insecurity. If you dont believe me,
then look around. Even ugly, obese people have friends. Even
stinky homeless people have boyfriends and girlfriends. Even
people who are completely unintelligent and watch reality TV all
day have confidence.!

No matter what you think your flaw or defect is you can

find people with the exact same flaw who are able to have
friends, confidence, or romance!!

This is something that took me a long time to accept. I fought this

idea and resisted it. I thought that my appearance was the real
reason for my lack of confidence and a girlfriend.
Moving Towards An
Assumption Of Acceptance
The key to making people like you is not in trying to appear
flawless or perfect, or trying to fit into some mould
promoted by the media for how you should be!

The key to making people like you is being comfortable

with yourself first. When you are comfortable with
yourself instead of being haunted by low self-esteem and
self-shame, then you get rid of the assumption of
disapproval that sabotages you.!

Once you get good at assuming people will like you, youll
see them respond much differently. Not just girls who you
talk to, but people you meet in many other situations, too.
Getting Rid Of Insecurities

Vulnerability - Whatever you feel ashamed or

insecure about, find a safe person to share it with.
Why therapy or mens groups help.!

Reality Testing - By exposing your flaws to

someone you trust, you can slowly dissolve the
shame around them.
Other Ways
Dont buy into the medias value system. Media
makes you think that good looking person = most
valuable. Its really just LUCK in getting the right
genes! Would you think a lottery winner was
superior to you.!

Inner critic - Speak to yourself in a more

compassionate self-soothing way. Beating yourself
up over mistakes just reinforces shame. How would
you talk to a 5 year old child struggling with your
Other Ways
Unconditional Self Acceptance. Accept yourself with all
your flaws and shortcomings just as you are now. !

Look for that feeling of shame around any part of your

appearance, your performance or success in life, your
sexual drives, etc. Thats the part of yourself you most
need to accept.!

This is NOT about giving up improvement Its funny how

only when I accept myself, then I can change. - Carl

All leading to the PRIME BELIEF

You Are Enough
When you feel like you are perfectly okay as you
are, and that people could like you just for you,
then a lot of the nervousness goes away.!

No longer trying to put on a performance or hide

parts of yourself to make people like you.!

Allows you to walk up and talk to women in a much

more relaxed way, without that guardedness.
In the next video, Ill show you how eliminating
these insecurities and shame will give you the
#1 most attractive quality a guy can have:

Non-Neediness: The
Most Attractive Quality
A Man Can Have
Why Shy And Nervous
Guys Are Needy
Shyness and social anxiety are basically a fear of
disapproval. Youre afraid of getting judged
negatively by someone.!

So when you feel nervous talking to a girl, its

because you need her to approve of you too much.!

In other words, the way you feel about yourself

is dependant on how she responds to you. If she
responds positively and likes you, youre overjoyed.
If she rejects you, youre crushed.
Why Shy And Nervous
Guys Are Needy
This emotional dependance on other people is

Neediness is putting other peoples opinion of you

over your own opinion of yourself. !

When you are needy, then you are crushed when a girl
you like doesn't like you back. You become attached
to a girl too quickly and too easily. And you are always
trying to monitor how she sees you. You are trying to
manipulate the perception she has of you to try to make
her like you.
More Signs Of Neediness
A needy guy will feel the need to brag or mention
accomplishments and possessions he hopes will
impress the girl. (Never realizing that doing this is in
itself unattractive.)!

A needy guy will try to hide his flaws to get acceptance.!

A needy guy will try hard to come up with interesting

lines and funny jokes to get a girl to like him. Maybe
hell even memorize lines and routines hoping they will
help him avoid rejection.
More Signs Of Neediness
A needy guy may try to think of excuses to talk to
a girl he's attracted to in hopes that something will
happen by accident without him revealing his

A needy guy will daydream and fantasize and "get

crushes" on girls he hasn't even talked to yet.!

A needy guy will call or text a girl several times in a

row if she doesn't reply.
To be attractive to a girl, you have to be less
emotionally invested in her than she is in you. This
lack of emotional investment is non-neediness.!

Non-neediness is attractive because it signals status. It

shows her that you dont think you are inferior to her.!

If you arent that emotionally affected by her approval

or disapproval, then you must have a lot going for you.
Bigger things going on in your life than her, which is
very attractive.
Signs of Non-Neediness
A NON-needy guy will not brag or try to impress the
girl. He doesn't feel the need to prove anything to
anyone, because he is secure in himself. He
believes that "I am enough", and that he is an
intrinsically likeable person.!

A NON-needy guy does not try to hide his flaws. He

knows that nobody is perfect, and that a girl who
rejects him for a flaw wasnt right for him anyway.
Signs of Non-Neediness
A NON-needy guy expresses his thoughts and desires
openly and honestly. He isn't afraid to expose his true
self to the girl even with the risk of rejection. For
example, he's not afraid to say "I saw you and I thought
you looked cute/nice/interesting" right from the beginning.
He doesn't hide behind memorized lines or routines.!

A NON-needy guy does not start to fantasize about a girl

or daydream about a future together. He realizes that,
until he has spent many hours talking to someone, he
doesn't know who they are as a person. He lets girls
prove their value to him before he's won over.
Signs of Non-Neediness
A NON-needy guy does not feel like he needs to be
entertaining a girl with funny lines, jokes or even magic
tricks for her to like him. (Although a sense of humour is
great, it has to be done in the right way -- most girls
aren't looking for a comedian.)!

A NON-needy guy knows that if a girl doesn't respond to

his text or call, then she wasn't the right partner for him
anyway. He WAITS a few days before texting again. He
doesn't obsess about winning her back. He moves on
and is secure in knowing he can find other options.
Why Is Non-Neediness
Communicates status. You are only emotionally
invested in the opinions of people who you think are
higher value than you. Would you care if a 5 year old on
the street called you a booger face? How about if a hot
girl called you a creep? When you feel inferior, you
become invested.!

Communicates a lack of desperation. Although women

will never admit this, they are very attracted to a guy who
they think could have a lots of other options. (She wants
to be the girl you picked out of all your options because
shes special.)
Why Is Non-Neediness
Asshole guys are non-needy. They dont give a damn about
the girls opinion of them. Thats what makes them attractive.
Also makes a girl overlook his bad qualities, like maybe hes a
total loser who just gets drunk and has a bad job.!

Most nice guys care way too much about getting the girl
to approve of them. Hes too weak and emotionally
dependant. The nice guy is technically the better option but
the girls emotions just wont let her become attracted to him.!

Best of both worlds is to become the good guy. Key is to

WANT the girl an even treat her with respect, but at the same
time NOT NEED her to like you and be willing to walk away.
How To Become
Important that you dont just try to appear or seem
to be non-needy, but that you actually BECOME
non-needy. !

Dont try to fake it, actually change your life and

thinking habits to stop being so emotionally
invested in girls that you like.!

Next video will show you the first way to get over
this neediness.
Neediness And
That One Special Girl
That One Girl
Neediness = being more emotionally invested in the
girl than she is in you.!

Worst thing to do is to become obsessed with

one girl you barely know.!

Maybe the girl showed you a little bit of interest.

Maybe you just talked to her once for a couple
minutes. Or maybe she's in your class and you've
never spoken a word to her before.
Stop The Unrealistic
It's this bad habit of fantasizing that makes some guys
torture themselves over a "crush" for months or years,
never actually being able to work up the courage to talk
to her or ask her on a date.!

My biggest crushes growing up One was a girl called

Lindsay from grades 6-8. Then another girl called Sarah
from grades 9-11. And others later on in university.!

The funny thing is, I thing both of these girls kind of liked
me. I caught them looking at me a couple of times. And
nothing ever happened. Because I fell for this trap.
Stop The Unrealistic
Maybe you went out of your way to pass her in the
hallways, you looked up her photos on Facebook
and tried to see if you two have anything in common.!

Then you spent hours imagining what it would be like

to go out with her, have her as your girlfriend, etc.
You start to believe shes special, shes different,
maybe even that shes your soulmate.!

Meanwhile, she may not even be aware that you

even exist.
Just Sabotaging Yourself
When you spend all this time fantasizing about a girl,
what do you think happens when you actually want to go
talk to her?!

You're too nervous to even move. You've thought about

her so long and built her up in your mind into such a
perfect creature that you become literally paralyzed by

And even if you do talk to her, the way you behave

communicates to her that you would be totally crushed if
she were to disapprove or reject you in any way.
Tricking Yourself Into
You put way too much time and effort thinking about
this girl before she had done anything to earn this
much attention.!

By repeatedly thinking about this girl, you

hypnotized yourself into believing that you actually
knew her. But she may be totally different than the
fantasy girl in your head.
Reality: You Dont Know Her
If you have a crush, then the image of her in your head is
much different than how she really is.!

People tend to put out their best parts for the world to see.
So you dont see her negative qualities and then imagine
her to be a perfect fit for you.!

Until you have gotten to know someone over a period

of time, you have no idea what they're actually like.
That girl you think is perfect may be annoying to hang out
with, she may be needy, she may be insecure despite
being beautiful, she may be completely unintelligent, or she
may be into the celebrity gossip shows you hate.
Dont Be Won Over So Soon
Dont have too many expectations with any one girl
unless you have spent a lot of time with her already. !

Talk to her without any hidden agenda of making her into

your one true love. Instead, talk to her to FIND OUT
what she is actually like. Keep it casual and see if you
two have chemistry.!

And don't be won over by looks alone. There are plenty

of cute girls out there. Many of those are as cute as the
one you are obsessed about ... and they have a
personality you will like spending time with!
What Else Does She
Offer Than Looks?
It's better to have an attitude of "what else do you offer?" Does the girl
have something other than her looks going for her? There are plenty of
cute girls in the world, but it's rare to find a girl you can have fun with
and one that has a personality that "clicks" with yours.!

Do not put the girl on a pedestal before you even know her. Treat her
as an equal human being, not a goddess. That's why so many women
give guys the advice to "be yourself." They don't like it when a guy is
trying hard to impress them and get them to like him when they haven't
done anything to deserve his attention yet except looking pretty.!

Realize that how someone looks does not dictate how valuable they
are. Being good looking is more about luck in getting the right genes
than anything else. Would you think that a lottery winner was superior
to you?
Ignore Disney
Disney and all the superhero movies just play into
this obsessive thought pattern many guys have.
And at the end of the movie, the girl usually sees
through the heros nerdiness and realizes how
much of a nice guy he is and starts dating him!

Unfortunately, this basically NEVER happens in real

life. If a guy felt undeserving of a girl and obsessed
over her all the time, then his needy behaviour
would turn her off 9/10 times.
Harsh Reality
The reality is that girls are attracted to guys who are NOT
emotionally invested in them. In other words, girls are attracted
when a guy is indifferent about them, at least in the beginning.!

This is why rockstars, badboys and assholes are the traditional

examples of guys who can easily attract women. The rockstar
has plenty of other options, and the asshole just doesn't care.!

And what about the "nice guy" who thinks about the girl 24/7?
Forget about what the movies show you. What actually
happens in real life? He either doesn't exist to the girl, or is too
scared to make a move, or is in the "friend zone." So much for
the movies.
Letting Go Of The Drug
Is hearing this a little painful to you? I know it
uncomfortable for me.!

Sometimes the fantasy is a comfortable escape

from reality, especially if youre inexperienced with
girls. Just realize that you probably WONT ever get
that girl you are fantasizing about, because you are
sabotaging yourself and making yourself needy.!

"If you put someone up on a pedestal they will have

no choice but to look down upon you."
You Dont Have A Soulmate
Whenever I had a big crush on a girl, I thought she
was the only one in the world who I could feel that
way about.!

Then I got another crush and this NEW girl was the
only one I could feel that way about.!

There isnt one girl that can make you feel a certain
way, there are many girls out there who you could
have the same type of chemistry with.
But How Do I Get
That One Girl?
Best way to stop being so invested in one girl is to
make this mindset shift!

Instead of viewing this system as a way to try to

get ONE special girl, instead view it as a way to
become good with girls in general.!

You can never guarantee that any one specific

women will like you, but you can become an overall
more attractive guy who can meet many other girls
just as attractive as her.
Having Options
Guys usually get into this trap when they have few or
no options. They just pick the one girl in their class or
work who is cutest.!

Best way to get over it is to spend some time learning

how to meet and talk to many different women so that
you dont spend all your time fantasizing about one.!

Chances of getting a cool girlfriend go up because you

can talk to her in an attractive non-needy way without
getting overly attached and obsessed with getting her.
Having Options
If you're not meeting different women, you start to
feel desperate because you have a lack of
opportunity and options.!

Doesn't mean you have to start approaching ten

women a day, but you do have to become less
passive. I'll show you how exactly in a later module.!

Next video Ill show you how to design a life that

makes you attractive and non-needy.
Designing A
Non-Needy Lifestyle
What Is This About?
Having a life you feel good with. That makes you
feel happy and fulfilled regardless if you have a girl
in your life or not.!

Not about ACTING non-needy, but actually having

things going on in your life where you dont need
her. You may want and desire her, but you dont
NEED to have her for you to feel good.!

Could come from having different friends,

interests, hobbies and passions in your life.
Emotional Independence
Think about this like investing in many different
sources to sustain your happiness.!

No good investor just puts all their money into one

company, they diversify their investments. If you
lose one friend, then youre not devastated.!

If you dont have a life like this, then even if you get
a girlfriend, then it will probably be a clingy
codependent relationship.
Treating Yourself Like You
Value Yourself
Investing in yourself. How would you treat a child or dog
who you really cared about? You would make sure its
health and appearance was taken care of. !

By investing in yourself, youre building pillars to support

the belief that I am a valuable person.!

Fashion and grooming. Doesn't have to be perfect,

don't get obsessed. Just needs to be good enough.
Good fit, nothing that has really ugly patterns or is
obviously out of style. Like attracts like, couples usually
dress pretty similar.
Being On Your Purpose
Big part of masculinity is having some greater goal,
purpose or direction in your life than your girlfriend. She
doesn't want to be your top priority in life, she would
rather join you in achieving your goal.!

Women often test men. Both when first meeting you

and in relationships. Not that they are crazy, but they
are drawn to emotional strength. If you dont have a
higher purpose outside her, then you will fail the tests and
become unattractive.!

See David Deida

Scarcity To Abundance
Scarcity: The belief that theres few opportunities in the
world. If you miss this one (this girl), then you wont get
another chance like it.!

Abundance: The belief that you have many opportunities

in your life, and that you are worthy of those opportunities.
You are in a position of choice.!

When you have a full life and you believe theres an

abundance of women you could meet and have a great
relationship with, then women can SENSE you dont need
them and its very attractive. (This is the opposite mindset
to getting obsessed over one special girl.)
The Ability To Walk Away
When you have a mindset of abundance, it allows
you to set boundaries for how people should treat
you. You can walk away if they cross those

Never be a sure thing. She should get the sense

that she could lose you. Too much certainty kills
attraction. Both when first dating and usually in a
The Ability To Walk Away
You wont chase after her if shes not putting effort
and investment back into you. Ex: Talking endlessly
instead of going on a date.!

Youll respect your own time. Not continue to

contact her if she doesnt show up for a date without

Youll make a move (ex: go for a kiss) to find out if

she really is interested instead of trying to be her
friend for months.
All of these behaviours communicate that you have
choice and respect for yourself, so you dont waste
time on girls who arent really serious about dating

Next video will talk about how your thoughts about

sexuality may be sabotaging you and how to
overcome neediness in this area.
Wrong Beliefs
About Sexuality
Wrong Beliefs About Sex
Believe women dont really like sex. They only trade sex
for relationships. If they have sex with a guy outside a
committed relationship, the guy is somehow tricking her.!

Guilt about her finding out that you DO want her for
sex. Dont want her to think you just want to use her for
sex. Act like she would get turned off if she ever found
out you wanted to have sex with her.!

These beliefs can make you use very ineffective

strategies for meeting girls.
Ineffective Strategies
Of Nice Guys
Doing friendly gestures with strings attached.
Listening to her problems and being there for her, and
expecting this to lead to future sex or girlfriend. Faking
being a friend is very manipulative.!

Never showing your romantic intentions. Im trying to

treat her like a person and not just get into her pants.
Deep down, you want to sleep with her just like those
other guys. You just have shameful beliefs about sex
which are causing your fears and insecurities.!

These strategies basically never work.

The Reality
Women love sex. Sex is pleasure, and who doesnt like
that? Who is usually the one moaning and going crazy
during sex?!

Women dont just trade sex for relationships. Most often

have sex just because it feels good, even out of
committed relationships.!

Youre not taking anything from a women by trying to

have sex fairly quickly. Youre giving her a great
experience. If you have sex with her within 2-3 dates,
then you both win.
The Two Boxes Fallacy
Women often have to hide how much they like sex
because of men. To protect their reputation, they
dont want anyone to think they are easy or sluts.

Good !
The Two Boxes Fallacy
Many men have ridiculous double standards They think a
girl is either a good girl who is pure and only has sex in
committed relationships. Or that shes a slut who is easy
and sleeps around.

Good !
There Are No Boxes
Sure, maybe a a tiny percentage of women are
sluts or pure girls, but the majority of women fall
somewhere in the middle.

Good !
Girls In Reality Sluts
There Are No Boxes
We live in a sexually liberated world. 90% more
likely to get laid on the first date today than 20 years
ago. Most societies have women who have become
sexually liberated. Conservative attitudes in past
are gone.

(Obviously some parts of the world are still
conservative. Middle East and parts of Asia for
There Are No Boxes
Girls go through different stages in their lives.
Sometimes in committed relationship, other times in
more open casual relationship, other times may
hook up with a couple of guys while shes traveling.!

Its only natural to experiment at some points in

your life to find out what you like.!

Best attitude is to be non-judgemental about sex.

Accept that she likes it, has slept with different guys
just to have sex.
Women Like Sex!
2 Conflicting Needs
Female Affection: Most guys primary motivation.
Want the girlfriend to cuddle and hold hands with.
Want that feeling of connection and belonging. Like
a warm blanket. Perfectly normal to want this.!

Sex: Not that big of a motivation for most guys,

despite stereotypes. You probably have a habit of
masturbating to porn already. You really just want
her to like you.
2 Types Of Guys Women
Date: Lover Vs. Provider

Lover: Guy who she sleeps with pretty quickly. Very

attracted to him. Relationship is more about sex in
the beginning.!

Provider: Guy who takes her out on months of

dates. Tries to show her how good of a boyfriend or
husband he would be.
Most Guys Fail When They
Try To Be The Provider
Many shy guys try to get the girl to see them as a
great boyfriend and provider. Paying for things,
doing favours, listening to her problems. !

Wait weeks or months before letting her know they

like her. Take her out on many many dates and
become committed to the girl before they have sex.!

The provider is not sexual with the girl. He

doesnt know how to get her attracted, so he thinks
he has to slowly win her over.
Why The Lover Strategy Is Better,
Even When Getting A Girlfriend
Im going to recommend you try to be her lover first, to
be more successful with women. Means you have to tap
into your drive for sex.!

Urgency. She expects to get swept off her feet and have
chemistry happen fast if she meets her dream man.!

Don't get any points or show her you "respect" her by

waiting to have sex. Often just makes her think youre
needy and desperate for doing all these favours for her
and taking her out to dinners.
Why The Lover Strategy Is Better,
Even When Getting A Girlfriend
You want affection from the girl. If you dont have sex
with the girl, you wont be able to get long-term
affection from her. She reserves affection for the guy
shes sleeping with.!

Girls are much more accepting of guys they have already

sleep with. Why losers get great girlfriends. Backwards
rationalization. !

Before shes slept with you, even small flaws or mistakes

can be a deal-breaker. Shes looking for reasons NOT to
sleep with you.
Why The Lover Strategy Is Better,
Even When Getting A Girlfriend

Nowadays, relationships usually start out more

casual. (Especially in big cities with people who are
20-35 years old.)!

Its pretty easy to start out as her lover, and then

transition to being her boyfriend. But if you are
friends with a girl for months, its hard to turn it
sexual later.
Roles And Boxes

Waiting too long also usually puts you into the box
or role of being her friend.!

Example: Coworkers role vs. friends role.!

Once someone is in a box, its hard to switch boxes.

Getting Into The Lover Role
Best to set up the relationship or expectations right
from the beginning. Two ways:!

1. Touch and physical contact early.!

2. Flirting. (Talking to her differently than a


Women love to feel desired. Not in a sleazy or

creepy way, but in a way that makes her feel
butterflies and sexual tension around you.
Why Hiding Your Romantic
Intentions Doesnt Work
Women wont risk being seen as easy or a slut, so
they will almost never make the first move. If you
keep the conversation friendly, then they will follow
your lead. !

If you want something more, then you need to be

the one to go first and make the conversation more
romantic or sexual.
How To Flirt?
Most guys don't understand flirting. And they either
are too serious and boring in a conversation OR they
mistakenly think that flirting is complimenting a girl
or blatantly displaying interest in her.!

Pretty girls probably have dozens of guys commenting on

their Facebook photos endlessly complimenting her. But
almost none of these guys chasing her online can
express this in real life.!

Next modules will show you exactly what to do and say

Dont be ashamed of your sexuality or try to hide
the fact that you do want her for sex. Not just for
sex, but it is a big part of why you like her.!

Women like sex, too. They just have to hide it

sometimes so they arent judged as sluts by guys.!

Try to get into the role of being her lover first,

instead of being a friend or provider.
So Far: Coming Up:

Inner mindsets and Tactical steps

belief changes
Specific examples of
Some core strategies exactly to do and say