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Marriage Indonesian-style

Level 2 Intermediate

1 Key Words

Fill in the gaps in the sentences with the words below.

bridegroom bride cuddle (vb) unconvincingly cleric


divorce (n) disobedient widower tsunami object (vb)

1. is a legal way of ending a marriage.

2. If someone is , they do not do what people in authority tell them to do.

3. If you to something, you are opposed to it.

4. The is a man who is getting married.


5. is a general word for priest.

6. A is a man whose wife has died.

7. If you someone, you put your arms round them and hold them close to show that you

like or love them.

8. A is a huge tidal wave.

9. The is a woman who is getting married.

10. If you do or say something , you do it in such a way that no-one really believes you.

2 Find the information

Lookinthetextandndthisinformationasquicklyaspossible.
1. How old is Tri?
2. What is Yantis job?
3. How big is Tris farm?
4. Where is Yanti from?
5. Where does Tini work?
6. How old was Tini when her parents tried to force her to marry?

Indonesian parents still pick childrens marriage partners


by John Aglionby in Bumi Agung

When the bridegroom, Tri Cayono, and the bride, Yanti, saw each other on their wedding day, their reactions
were rather unusual for a future husband and wife. Yanti greeted Tri with a formal handshake and a nervous
smile.Trinoddedbrieyatherandmovedaway.Duringtheeveningtheydidnowshowanyaffectiontowards
one another. They did not kiss. They didnt want to cuddle one another, even when the photographer tried to
persuade them to do so.
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Macmillan Publishers Ltd 2006


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Marriage Indonesian-style
Level 2 Intermediate
This is an example of the traditions that continue to exist in many parts of Indonesia. Not only had Yanti,
22,arestaurantcook,andTri,24,afarmer,justmetforthersttime,theyhardlyknewanythingabouteach
other. Er, what does he like to do in his spare time? Yanti asked a cousin the day before the wedding.

Two months ago Tri told his friends and family that he wanted to marry a girl from central Java. I think
theyre cooler and more fun, he said. The fact that he didnt know any girls from central Java wasnt a
problem for him. A friend of his, Fajar, said he had a cousin, Mursiyati, who might be a good wife. Tri accepted
the offer immediately. Mursiyatis parents forced her to accept Tris offer the fact that Tri has a one and a
quarter acre (0.5 hectare) farm was very attractive to her labourer father and she agreed to marry Tri.
A month later Mursiyati met someone she liked and married her new boyfriend instead. But Tri was still
determinedtomarryawomanfromcentralJavaandFajarfelthehadtondoneforhim.

So early in June the family suggested Yanti, a cousin. Again land was the central factor. As soon as I heard
her voice, saw her photo and learnt she was a cook, I knew that she was the woman for me, Tri said,
unconvincingly. Yanti said she was happy and excited at the prospect of marrying Tri, but her father,
Saulusmin, was not. I mean they havent even met - how can they get married? he said. But he did want
to argue with his wife, Gina. She would have been angry with me if I had objected. It would not have been
pleasant, Saulusmin said.

It is impossible to know how many Indonesians end up in arranged marriages like these. Saman, the cleric
who married Yanti and Tri, said extreme stories such as theirs, where the couple had not met, are rare and
perhaps only 1% of marriages are like this. But there are many where the children do what theyre told, he
said. Tini, a maid in Jakarta who ran away after her parents tried to force her, at the age of 15, to marry a
28-year-old, thinks about a third of all marriages in her district take place without the full agreement of the
bride and groom.

World Vision, an international aid agency, says that arranged marriages are still common and experts say
it is unlikely they will die out soon. Its the tradition and its hard to go against traditions, said Gadis Arivia,
of the womens group Jurnal Perempuan. Parents dont believe in modern practices, particularly when they
seedivorceratesgoingup.Daughterswhoobeytheirparentsgetsupport.Thedisobedientoneshavea
much harder life.

TheseriesofrecentnaturaldisastersandcommunalconictsinIndonesiahavealsohelpedtomaintainthe
tradition, said Samsidar, a commissioner of the National Commission for Violence Against Women. In
situations where women have died, it is traditional for their younger sisters to look after their children, and
this usually means they have to marry the widower, she said. There is also a strong economic aspect. After
somethinglikethetsunamimanypeoplehadnancialproblems,Samsidarsaid.Sowesawalotofpeople
hurrying to marry off their children to make their own lives that much easier.

Back in Bumi Agung, Yanti tried to convince everyone she was happy. If I dont have to go to work again
- its his job to provide for me - and if I can have a couple of children, then Ill be happy, she said. And Ill
probably be able to come back and visit central Java once a year.
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Macmillan Publishers Ltd 2006


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Downloaded from the Magazine section in www.onestopenglish.com


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Marriage Indonesian-style
Level 2 Intermediate

3 Comprehension check

Are these statements True or False according to the text?


1. Arranged marriages are dying out in Indonesia.
2. Natural disasters have prolonged the tradition of arranged marriages.
3. Tri and Yanti were cool towards each other at their wedding.
4. Yantis father was happy and excited about his daughters wedding.
5. Most marriages in Indonesia are arranged marriages.
6. The bridegrooms land is an important factor.
7. Yanti says she will be happy if she has a couple of children.
8. When women die, their older sisters look after their children.

4 Vocabulary Collocations

Match the words in the left-hand column with those in the right-hand column to make collocations from the text.

1. wedding a. agency

2. nervous b. rate

3. spare c. agreement

4. full d. day

5.aid e.conict

6. divorce f. time

7. natural g. smile

8. communal h. disaster

5 Vocabulary Word Building

Complete the table.

Verb Noun Verb Noun

1. exist 5. accept

2. marry 6. agree

3. offer 7. obey

4. arrange 8. provide
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Macmillan Publishers Ltd 2006


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Marriage Indonesian-style
Level 2 Intermediate

6 Vocabulary Word family

Look at the example with agree and then make a similar word family with obey.

agree dWZn
agreement

(adjective)

disagree

disagreement

(adjective)

7 Discussion

Do you agree with the idea of arranged or forced marriages? Make a list of points for and against the practice.

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Macmillan Publishers Ltd 2006


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Downloaded from the Magazine section in www.onestopenglish.com


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