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THE ORANGE MANGO CABARET

Created by

Travis Snyder-Eaton
I. THE OPENING

Friv O' Less enters.

FRIV O' LESS
Welcome to the Orange Mango Cabaret
So glad you can be here on this day
To celebrate the coronation of our
Mango in Chief
And by celebrate I mean protest to
say the least
While many wept, others cheered
Some fled cause things got weird
But you stayed so give yourself
applause
Because the next four years may
give us pause

(Pause)

So what do you do give up and go
home
Or fight cause we can't do this
alone
But today you decided to come here
To see our society in a mirror
So sit tight cause you're in for a
ride
To learn what we do to survive

CUE WHAT KEEPS
MANKIND ALIVE
2.

II. MAN

FRIV O' LESS
Man
An Icarus society superior to any
substance
Suckling sustenance from the tit of
Mother Earth
Both skillful and cursed by an
intelligence with an unbounded need
for satisfaction and an insistent
need for survival
If we are cornered we fight
Or find our way out
by any means necessary
If we are hungry we eat
Or starve
Those are the two choices
No one else can do it for you in
the wild
When it's available we take as much
as possible because it satisfies
our emotion
And isn't that what we want most
out of life
To be satisfied
To fulfill some fantasy that we are
bigger than the universe
Time and time again
we are told what we need
Who we are
How to think
But maybe
All is not what it seems

GO TO THE CAVE
3.

III. THE MAGICIAN

FRIV O' LESS
When I was younger I went to
Disneyland for the first time
I was so excited walking down
Mainstreet
My parents
They studied their maps
but I had different plans
I wanted to meet my favorite
cartoons
Mickey Minnie Pluto Goofy
and the Duck
I went to find them
while my parents planned the day
I pushed past strollers and bags
I made it just outside the fire
station
When I realized something
My parents didn't follow
They just kept walking
Just then I felt a hand on my
shoulder
And a voice of a friendly man was
heard
Are you lost
I turned to him
I couldn't believe my eyes
It was Walt Disney
He looked at me smiling
A very charming smile
He told me that he'd let me in on a
secret
He told me the secret to the magic
Now do you want to know what it is

(Pause)

That none of that was real
Walt Disney died in 1966
I was born in 1991
I bet you believed me
Don't lie I'll know
It's theatre
An art form focused on controlling
an audience to believe and
emphasize with characters on stage
The suspension of belief clears
your conscience of any suspicion
We open the show lying to you
(MORE)
4.

FRIV O' LESS (CONT'D)
So that's all you expect
Of course you believed me

GO TO FAKE NEWS
5.

IV. THE LIAR

FRIV O' LESS
When there's no more trust
You start thinking the worst
Fantasies within the mind
Nothing but a haunting curse
They may seem realistic
They may seem absurd
But that's for you to be the judge
Just take me at my word
Remember not everything is as it
seems
And that men are assassinated for
their dreams
The killer escapes into the shadows
While the victim dies and humanity
bleeds

GO TO DOG EAT
DOG
6.

V. THE RELIGIOUS

FRIV O' LESS
He claimed to be a holy man
A title man claims
but hasn't the balls to fulfill
Self righteous supremacists
intolerable of anything
that strays from their beliefs
They're right you're wrong
There's nothing more and nothing
less
They try to control you
How you live your life
Where you go on Sunday
What you do with your body
Who to fuck
If you disobey then you're damned
If you follow you're damned
Just in a different way
Just as the holy man
going behind closed doors morphs
into the hypocritical heathen that
he so labels a sinner
(beat)
Religion is so frivolous

GO TO FATHER
7.

VII. THE SUPREMACIST

FRIV O' LESS
When Power is threatened
it begins to take drastic measures
Hate becomes the hellfire
that burns in mankind
The hate of the Other
The unknown outsider
oppressed from day one
discriminated due to direct
differences
between the Power and the Other
When the Other succeeds over the
Power
the Power is threatened
The Power ignores that it has the
power
Instead the Power acts victimized
It believes that the Other
Who has no power
Has all of it
That's how the hate forms
That's how violence begins
(Beat)
But how does it end?

GO TO JUSTITIA
8.

VIII. THE UNITED

FRIV O' LESS
They try to keep us apart
They don't want us smart
They want us to be dumb
They want us to be bums
So that we fight
So that we divide
So they sit in their tower
So they can harness their power
In fear of the day we rise

We must take a stand
We must raise our hand
We must clench our fist
We must resist
United we are together
United as birds of a feather
United were one
United were not done
Today is the day we rise

We will walk with our feet
We will march in the street
We will lock our arms
We will cause no harm
They will see our fire
They those liars
They will hide in fear
They those billionaires
They will know we have risen

CUE FINALE
9.

IX. THE ACTOR

Music stops on third beat.

NOTE: The host begins removing their make up. The following
words spoken by the host shall not be the one on paper, but
rather an accumulation of how the actor playing the host
feels about the current political and social situation. The
following words were used in the 2017 production and shall be
different in any other production.

THE ACTOR
(to the audience)
I'm fucking done. I'm leaving
because I'm so just fucking done
with the show. Did any one else
expect to see a show about tropical
fruit singing and dancing? I
fucking did, and were you mad when
you didn't? Yes, so was I. I bet
you were pissed too when you saw
the trailer and thought there'd be
boobies in the show. There were no
fucking boobies in the show and
they're sure as hell not coming
out, cause no ones getting paid.
The point being; this shit was
misleading, and distracting, but
why? Why are you still perpetuating
this shit? I'm not going to, I'm
fucking going home. I don't even
watch the news cause of this shit.
I stick to my middle class citizen
life, I clock in, I make my
fucking check, and I clock out.
Guess what, I don't watch CNN on
Sunset and Vine (I don't even know
if those are the streets.) while I
fucking do it. It's all shit, they
don't even know what they're
saying. Now that's fake news.
(find a woman in the
audience)
Excuse me Miss, do you have a
degree in journalism? Do you watch
the news? Are you looking for a
job, and are those your real
breasts? Doesn't matter, you are so
hirable for Fox right now, perfect.
We all don't care, as long as it
comes out nice and looks pretty
you'll fucking eat it up. It
distracts us from the real shit
that's going on?
(MORE)
10.

THE ACTOR (CONT'D)
When's the last time we talked
about healthcare? If I hear about
Russia again, I will throw a
fucking TV from the second story of
my apartment. Pay attention, it's a
fucking variety show, it's a...

A beat.

THE ACTOR (CONT’D)
Okay, that's not funny, that's not
fuckin funny. I get it now, and I'm
still mad. You want your fucking
curtain call? Here. Y'all better be
ready.

She pulls open the curtain.

THE ACTOR (CONT’D)
Here you go. Here's all of your
fake news people. Alright, good
job. I'm leaving

She begins to walk off and turns to the audience.

THE ACTOR (CONT’D)
And I was born in '92.

She is gone.

BLACKOUT.