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WOMAN ’S ERA
YES: YOU CAN MAKE
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HOW TO DEAL WITH
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JULY (SECOND) 2010
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apple and Place eight pieces the chilled cherry pulao 200 ml of water the pieces in seeds. N. N. strips and keep of water and ml Heat 200 the and stir till METHOD heat add the sugar r and remove Lower the Peel the cucumbe into small sugar melts. to chill. Murthy 62 ART ON CARPETS Suman Bajpai 76 A WOMAN WEARING MANY HATS Shakti Koushik 126 ALLOW THEM TO BE TAUGHT BY NATURE ALSO Rajshekhar Pant 128 LEGALISING PROSTITUTION A VIABLE 94 CURE FOR HEARTBREAK SOLUTION Sucharita Dutta-Asane PVV Satyanaryana 60 TEN FASHION NO – NO’S Minakshi. Heat stir till at once. Nathan COOKERY 37 FUN WITH SEASONAL FRUITS Chocolate Cake with Fresh Cherries ● Stewed Pears in Sweet Mango Pulp ● Mint and Cucumber Refresher (Cold Soup) ● Apple in Mustard Sauce ● Stewed Pineapple and Cherries with Ice Cream ● Poached Eggs with Orange Sauce ● Chicken Salad with Litchees ● Watermelon and Cucumber Refresher with Mint ● Stewed Peaches with Mint ● Rasgollas Baked with Mango Puree ● pulp and the mango Serve a portion of mint leaves. mint leaves minute.. peel the apples. S. Lower and served heating 1 cup the lukewarm ET By SWE add e when mingled the heat and drinking chocolatis IN to the GO PULP the powder with other water and stir tillwater. powder. Enjoy 300 gm fresh over the chocolat into in decoration the cherries serve cutting te sauce: seasonal fruits sauce and the chocola – For drinking chocolate slices. B. G.. APPL AND CHERRY PULAO INGREDIENTS: 2 pears 1 apple cherries 200 gm fresh 3 tbsp sugar powder 1/ tsp cinnamon 2 cooked rice 1 plate full (kept warm) Stewed pears pears: For the stewed 2 pears 3 tbsp sugar 1/ tsp cloves powder till the sauce wooden spoon Put off the heat begins to thicken.. a serving plate pieces. Put around 3-4 and remove off the heat the syrup the pears from spoon. Dr Rumy Agarwal 28 ● ● Sprouts. fruit pieces around soup bowls should take ing: for Place in three colour – this For garnish in the fridge Mix in the cherries the bowls the place 3-4 minutes. Biswas 14 44 SUMMER & MONSOON BEAUTY CARE Ameeta Sharma ARTICLES 26 IT’S ONLY WORDS AND 116 MIND SAYS “MOVE ON. Cut aside. the cinnamo n and cut in er the seeds and mix and apple the cucumb the pear pieces. warm rice sweet to obtain mixer and keep do not the cooked before apples but and serving dish and place pieces just Place on a of the rice Cut into small to serve the soup. Stir on low For mangoes to the 1 kg sweet pamper your add sugar sugar melts and the 2 tsp sugar – optional into the fire till the cream also buds. garnish with chilled.. Mint and cucumber refresher mix in the cloves pieces and Add the pear fire. to chill. cake on the its Place the fridge at season has plate in the and keep the so that the sauce to CHERRIES hour least for 1 abundance INGREDIENTS: sponge cake and thickens. Desai 96 ANIMALS SYMBOLISE HIS THOUGHT PROCESS Subhra Mazumdar 133 ARE YOU WATCHING MORE TV M. Issue No.” HEART SAYS WORDS ARE ALL HAVE Manisha Prakash “HANG ON.. Spread Fruits are all room tempera top of the cake on CAKE WITH sauce evenly favourites. SprinkleCut and core the slotted spoon. Khosla 58 36 DECORATIVE GRASS Shilpa Shanbhag PARTNER SEARCH Gulsum Basheer 122 THE MUNNABHAI BOY Anil Merani 48 DO YOU SHOP TILL YOU DROP? WANNA KNOW WHY? Rumy Agarwal 124 CREATING ENVIRONMENTAL AWARENESS IN SCHOOL CHILDREN D. Add 3-4 cook on low the to pieces and pieces and till blend in a mixer time to time the sugar and stirring from begin to change and 4 obtain a pulp. Dividethree for another the soup the into and cook METHOD s.. or out settles down the 1 kg chocolatecherries for serving spread e Just before offer. cut into g mint leaves heat and remove a soup Put off the with Peel the mangoe the mango remainin and place in the the syrup and run fruits from the chilli flakes in a portions small pieces Place the cooked and cream bowls.” 32 DIEPPE PRETTIEST OF CHANNEL PORTS Eva Bell Nandita 118 THE PROBLEM OF SHAKING PALSY Dr S. to cool to 52 HEMA’S CHOICE 80 WHEN DEEPU WED DEBBIE Romola Shanbhag Keerti Garg R. lukew hot METHOD the chocolate sauce: STEWED PEAR Prepare of water. chocolateKeepmixes well with a 3-4 tbsp thick taste stirring sauce. cake with Chocolate fresh cherries FICTION 18 BEING MYSELF Kusturi Rangachari Anil Kumar Panda MINT AND CUCUMBER REFRESHER (cold soup) INGREDIENTS: leaves r 60 gm mint sized cucumbe 3-4 mediumcurd 100 ml thick 1/ tsp sugar chilli 2 ground red 1 tsp coarsely flakes 1 apple E PEAR. fruits on top in the fridge the pears. sugar a smooth pulp. with a slotted on each Place 2 pieces top with and serving plate in sweet mango pulp By Roma Ghosh Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 ● ● ● 120 MY FIRST O 136 ON CATCHING THE TRAIN AND THE WINNER IS. cut METHOD the apple but Do not peel remove or strips and the into cubes Do not peel the seeds.com 88 DOUBLE-INCOME FINANCE MANAGEMENT Sudha Chandrasekaran BOMBAY FILMDOM 7 5 STRATEGIES TO HELP YOU SURVIVE OFFICE POLITICS Lesley D. Mix this MAN powder IENTS: and dissolved in the g water and also INGRED mango pulp: the ingredients into the remaininwater. the you small portions of the Do not peel and and remove soup and Pear. 879 BUILDS HAPPY HOMES CONTENTS Founder: Vishwa Nath (1917-2002) womansera. powder. Cut into are ready apple serve at once. and serve add the sugar heat and Lower the sugar melts. Musk Melon and Watermelon Salad Musk Melon with Peanut Butter Sauce Burger Patties with Crushed Pineapple and Apple Sauce Aam Pana Sweet Rice Caramelised Peaches with Ice Cream .JULY (SECOND) 2010 Vol 37. Place mint leaves and fire. stirring cook on low the to time till from time to change pears begin should take colour – this minutes. on and stir gently. 2 tbsp different forms arm 3 tsp sugar S chilled. Every FRESH plate with a spatula. or thin into cubes pears. Katju the sauce the and allow time CHOCOLATE ture.
114. IN STEP WITH TIME DIFFERENT CUTS Editor. Zone-I. E-3. Ghaziabad and Delhi Press. bank draft or money order payable at New Delhi. Sahibabad. Ashiana Towers.V. Bangalore-52 Ph: 22267233 Kolkata: Poddar Point. G-3. CLASSIFIED ADVERTISEMENT DEPARTMENT M-12.000 131 KITCHEN QUERIES EVERY FORTNIGHT Lucknow: B-G/3. Connaught Circus. No responsibility is assumed for material submitted for publication.. 4. Jhandewala Estate. Phone: 0612-2685286. Rani Jhansi Marg. 41398888. 24122661. Publisher & Printer PARESH NATH Printed at Delhi Press Samachar Patra Pte Ltd. Phone: 033-22298981 Kochi: G-7. FILL UP THE Page CROSSWORD 134 130 WHO GAVE THE RIGHT TO KILL (Poem) AND WIN RS 10. A-36. MY FRIENDS AND ME. 113. photo or any other matter can be reproduced from this magazine without written permission.com EDITORIAL. Chennai: 14. cheque. Ahmedabad-380 009. Court. Shop No. Phone: 040-27896947 Self-addressed stamped envelopes must be enclosed with all manuscripts. GD Ambedkar Marg. New Delhi-110 055. Lucknow-226001. International Subscription Air Mail: US $ 100 (One Year) US $ 190 (Two Years) US $ 270 (Three Years) Sea Mail: US $ 34 (One Year) Subscription amount. Phone: 079-26577845. H. Bangalore: Delhi Press No. Chenoy Trade Centre. Cunningham Road. Opp. Patna-800 001. Phone: 41398821. Patna: 111. 21. Exhibition Road. Jaipur 302 006. New Delhi-55. India. ADVERTISEMENT & PUBLICATION OFFICE Delhi Press Building. Ph: 022-24101192. 68 50 RATES: Inland 1 copy Rs 30 1 year annual subscription: Rs 650. Ashram Road. story. Kochi-682 031. from E-3. New Delhi-110 055. Chennai-600 008. Phone: 0484-2371537. Jhandewala Estate. Secunderabad: 122. This copy is sold on the condition that jurisdiction for all disputes concerning sale.. Phone: 044-28554448 Mumbai: A-4.FASHION 84 GRATEFULLY YOURS 123 NEIGHBOURS ALL 134 CROSSWORD 146 AS YOU SAY 30 NEWS IN PICTURES 78 MODULAR MAGIC! THE LITTLE MASTER 86 FEATURES 27 TEENACHE 132 WHY SHOUT? (Poem) 35 BEAUTY QUERIES 137 NEW LAUNCHES 65 PERSONAL 138 MONEY MATTERS PROBLEMS 140 CLASSIFIEDS 85 YOUR BODY 95 CHILD CHALLENGE READERS’ CONTESTS 115 MY FAMILY. Phone: 0522-2218856. Bhopal-462011 Phone: 2573057. Cison’s Complex. Sapru Marg. Pioneer Towers 1. 116. Marine Drive. Shriram Industrial Estate. COPYRIGHT NOTICE © Delhi Press Patra Prakashan Pte Ltd. Montieth Road.womansera. Bhopal: 12-B Maharana Pratap Nagar. Jhandewala Estate. 24113970. Fax: 91-11-23625020 The names of characters used in all fiction and semi-fiction articles are fictitious. in any currency equivalent to US $ as mentioned above may be remitted through credit card. Park Lane. Phone: 011-23416313. Vyas Hospital Ajmer Road. E-mail: admin@womansera. Phone: 3296580 Title WOMAN’S ERA registered with Government of India as trade mark.. 3954124 Jaipur: Geetanjali Tower.S.com . subscription and published matter will be forums/tribunals at Delhi. otherwise the rejected material will not be returned. New Delhi-110 001. Mumbai-400 031. Narayan Chambers. ISSN 0971-1503 No article. Kolkata-700 016. Secunderabad-500 003. OFFICES Ahmedabad: 503. drawn in favour of: Delhi Prakashan Vitran Pte Ltd E-3. New Delhi-110 055. E-3. Jhandewala Estate. Wadala. www. New Delhi-110 055 and published on behalf of Delhi Press Patra Prakashan Pte Ltd. Park Street.
So the pace of economic reforms always remained slow and full of hiccups. our Prime Minister has also indicated further hike in diesel prices under decontrol policy. Everything here from food to fuel had been enjoying heavy subsidies from the government. In India. he will have to cut down his expenses in order to cope with the ever-increasing dearness. It should give rise to healthy debate for total uplift of the economy. His income is limited and he has to manage with the same meagre income. who is employed in unorganised sector. implemented since then for the government employees. Hence there is no other way except letting it go as per the ways of international market. such a unity was witnessed among the opposition parties. clothing. the Government in India also shook off its old socialist structure and started moving towards liberal economy. Apart from this. housing and education of his children to meet. Two Pay Commissions. It is not that the goods were cheaper earlier. You cannot make the system to go with you. the government can no longer bear the burden of oil pool deficit. Two decades have passed since then but healthy signs are missing. Monsoon session of Parliament will start soon. letters@womansera. There are indications that the petroleum prices were decontrolled to provide undue advantage to some big corporate houses venturing into India’s oil wells. But this is an unfair practice and is bound to have an adverse impact in long run. the government is benefiting some peer groups at the cost of others and common people. For long. But in reality. But it continues to give incentive packages to the companies as before. But everybody in the country was not prepared either mentally or economically to keep pace with the changing economic order. We can expect bubbly debate on dearness. Jobless villagers are given assured income even if they are doing just nominal task. The government took full care of its employees to shield them from increasing inflation. Main stress of the governments. which is increasing day by day. rather we may say. in the name of eradicating unemployment and poverty the government has launched a number of rural employment generation schemes with good intention. The government cannot coax the people to accept dearness as their fate. He does not want to bother about the finer aspects of economics. For the first time in the entire tenure of the UPA. The fact is when you are living in an economy (countries are now spelled economies). The government claims that the country has successfully overcome the recession and its economy is booming again. as transportation has become more expensive. is kept outside the purview of the Pay Commission. but he was able to afford them.EDITORIAL DEMON CALLED DEARNESS C ommon man in the country is nowadays perplexed by dearness. Giving vent to increasing public anger against growing dearness. Opposition called bundh to highlight the problems of the public. with a socialist mindset. the government has withdrawn subsidies on the petroleum products making them dearer. Poverty has grown out of all proportions instead of diminishing. But dearness is a perpetual problem here. Clearly. India has been following capitalist economic system with a socialist infrastructure. You have to go with the system. the parties in power had to take care of their vote bank also. India is often compared with the communist China in terms of economic progress. But the common man. In capitalist India this is unimaginable. Common man has only his immediate requirements of food. also played vital role in fanning inflation as the government people got more money at their disposal. was to convince the masses about the compulsions they were facing in world economic order. government is passing some economic shocks to its people. According to him.com We 6 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . all the opposition parties organised a daylong bundh in the country. Two decades ago. bank loans are given at zero rates. Poor are multiplying and progress is still elusive. you cannot help but be a part of it. This bundh may be termed most successful in the sense that it got full public support. Only the Finance Minister can tell it better who these corporate houses are. Finance Minister Pranab Mukherjee rules out any rollback in the petroleum prices. irrespective of whichever party was in power. Now. northeast and Naxal-infested states thousands of crores of rupees are being allocated. But how long can he do so? A day will come when growing dearness will devour not only all his income but his savings also. Naturally it will have cascading effect on prices. Now. It is another thing that funds are being siphoned off to the influential people. Moreover. to make their products competitive in international market. It is a matter of investigation how much part of these funds is used for the real purpose and how much is usurped by the corrupt bureaucracy. Also in the name of fighting terrorism and Naxal menace in J&K. Deeds of the governments pumped lot of money into economy. deficit being absorbed by the government. Moreover. All these measures have resulted in increased money flow into the market leading to higher rate of inflation. in tune with the changing world order. Naturally. he is unable to buy things of his choice.
Stay-at-home mom is still a necessity.DOUBLE-INCOME FINANCE MANAGEMENT How to make it significantly better than a single-income household. The couple had all kinds of gadgets and a luxurious lifestyle which no one else could afford in the neighbourhood. there HAD to be two incomes — unless one had a significantly high income. nothing was the same. mom’s help with homework. Then came the neighbour’s wife.. By Sudha Chandrasekaran G one are the days when most women stayed at home with their kids. Everyone was in a hurry. togetherness was replaced by “wheneverness”. It was a warm. . supper on the stove or in the oven. Now. a hug from mom. so on and so forth. quality was replaced by quantity.. and it was such a comfort to come home from school to find mom there. Suddenly. maybe baking a cake or frying hot samosas. but is now a rarity. All the wishes of their kids were fulfilled and soon this trend of double-income couples caught on and it became the norm. loving era. an engineering graduate who started working as a systems engineer in a nearby firm.
eat out frequently. Sure. expenses are usually high. Too often. travel. wear branded clothes. “People have realised that. They tend to dislike the interference of others in their own space and they feel strongly about using their money as they see fit even after marriage. And secondly. DOUBLE-INCOME HOUSEHOLDS SHOULD END UP TWICE AS WEALTHY AS SINGLE-INCOME FAMILIES BUT IN PRACTICE. double-income families find that they are not really much better off than single-income With double income deepening their pockets. And roughly 20 years into marriage. The new. after three decades of work life. but the truth is. You might have to keep two maids instead of one. All these plus taxes effectively skim the cream off the second income. visit fitness centres regularly. Surely one plus one totals two. For some years now. Firstly. IT IS MORE AN EXCEPTION THAN A RULE. when couples spend a large portion of their income to set up house. The expenses. a finance analyst. there are commuting. income is often misconstrued as wealth. Therefore. Often. gifting and theoretically at least can be reduced at will. In the first place. stow that surplus away smartly into the right instruments at the right times. which means that you cannot just earn your money. but must also grow over time through judicious investments. continue through every stage and are of two kinds — discretionary and non-discretionary. The Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . households. even though they may want to stay at home. like jobs. who matured amid increasing home ownership and a decline in the birth rate. relationships are no longer permanent. Another sociological development reinforces the increasing preference among married couples for financial independence. Capping expenses: We all need to lead a good life but without prudence.” Marriages today are riddled with divorces which make the sense of security harder to come by. pay for a creche or maintain a second car. on an average. often had their own rooms. one cannot create surplus amounts of money needed for wealth creation. doubleincome families often fritter away the second salary unconsciously just to maintain a household. The former is what you spend on non-compulsory but vital chunks of daily living — entertainment. in theory. the increasing presence of women in the workforce and the rise in the age at which they marry has led to a boom in single women purchasing their own homes and property. leisure. women are pushed into the workforce in middle age. savings again slow down. they can and often do. earning double-incomes is significantly easier than managing them. The generations now in their twenties and thirties. It all sounds easy enough to find answers to the eternal question of how you can make your money work harder. Some of the managing techniques are pointed out by finance planners. etc. In case of divorce. take dream vacations. Then. families create wealth between the third and twentieth years of their marriage. since large expenses like children’s higher education and marriage happen. Second incomes cannot just vanish down a black hole. So where do you cut back? In the first years after marriage. with the husband and wife handling their own incomes separately. Says Rohan.difficult to establish joint ownership of property owned by one partner prior to marriage. which gives the couple one more reason to opt for separate accounts within the home. Married couples also find it 8 SURE. business attire and entertainment costs. Divorce law also pushes women into the workplace. rapidly spreading family model is now run along the lines of an equal partnership. it is more an exception than a rule. The desire for private space also factors in the current trend towards separating aspects of a couple’s finances. IN THEORY. young couples of today can afford to do impulsive shopping. one should keep expenses under control so that a surplus amount of money is created for investments and next. double-income households should end up twice as wealthy as single-income families but in practice. of course.
HOME POSSESSIONS. And these are compounded by imprudent capital expenditure — that hi-tech home theatre system you simply must have. Not being able to create adequate wealth despite a double income is to fritter away a crucial advantage. Wealth should be protected from uninsurable risks like a job loss. Often. leaving funds that can be invested elsewhere. One must have a broad idea of where his/her money is getting spent. Every expert will tell you that income has to be converted to wealth. most of this 10 per cent should come from the second. credit cards and personal loans. THE BEST WAY TO PROTECT WEALTH IS TO COVER ALL INSURABLE RISKS — CARS. But before you come up with an investment plan. with expenses being borne by the higher income. And last. The idea is to evaluate how the family’s expenses. And since both. one should avoid loans pertaining to cars. Non-discretionary expenses are the biggest hurdles in wealth creation for double-income families. wealth creation does not suffer a setback if it goes missing for a brief period. take a home loan as early as possible. the loan cost comes down considerably. The best way to protect wealth is to cover all insurable risks — cars. . And while looking for a house. More important.non-discretionary expenses are mandatory payments towards insurance premiums. In the years soon after marriage. That means the entire lower income and a portion of the other income has to be saved. the smallest setback can wipe out the savings. home possessions. applying for a loan jointly with both spouses as co-owners fetches a large loan. this strategy empowers them. Other expenses: Loans are not the only red spot in your expense account. at least 10 per cent of the double-income needs to be saved. the husband and the wife will get tax breaks. or the Honda CR-V you really cannot do without. ensuring that the entire family has adequate medical insurance is a must. Ideally. These dig deep holes in your wealth pile and disturb the process of compounding. More conservative planners. It is generally found that double-income families underestimate the risk cover needed when one or both spouses become disabled or pass away. Next. in fact. The only exception is education loans. It is this difference that must be bridged by life insurance. Risk management: Unless the bases are covered. Loans should not cross 30 per cent of the gross income. This is when one can look at other loans — say for a car upgrade — provided total loans are still under the 30 per cent limit. with little time for financial planning. home loan EMIs will consume a smaller percentage of it. Also. loan EMIs. Tax planning: Neither death nor taxes are unavoidable. lifestyle and financial goals will be affected if one or both incomes are wiped out by death or disability. The costs of upgrading to a bigger house later. The key is to find the balance between spending today and providing for tomorrow. As job security becomes increasingly fickle and people look forward to taking brief breaks from work to retrain or just to unwind. This means figuring out the difference between what these will cost and what the value of the existing assets is. Tabs on loans: Getting sucked into a life where most of your income goes towards EMIs is not advisable. Insurance premiums should not be viewed as expenditure. parents and guests. two important areas need to addressed — risks and taxes. in terms of brokerage and stamp duty. but the truth is taxes make a big hole in your wealth UNLESS THE BASES ARE COVERED. ample life insurance has to be taken. first focus on getting yourself a home loan and nothing else. This cash invariably gets spent on impulsive expenses like a binge at the latest nightspot or the fancy gizmo just released. Buying various types of insurance alone is not enough. which create the intangible asset of skills. This means that in the initial years. when the couple is setting up a home. but definitely not least. Other debts: As the income increases. buy one that will best meet future needs like accommodating children. Since crucial expenses are not dependent on the second income. Any other EMI must be treated as a consumption expense. The trick lies in how you do it. are high. advise clients to stay away from debt unless their investments earn substantial returns. Given the low rates. lower income. the second income should be looked at as a savings vehicle and not as a handy till to fund extravagances. Ideally. couples leave a lot of cash lying idle in a bank saving account. THE SMALLEST SETBACK CAN WIPE OUT THE SAVINGS. house rent or telephone bills.
there is no concept of joint tax returns here. then it is advisable to avoid investment of the husband’s income in her name or gifting her cash. if the husband and the wife are in different tax slabs. depending on the difference in the individual incomes. a creative director with a leading advertising agency.accumulation. stereos and even automobiles. Both partners need to decide the portion of the incomes that need to be kept to themselves and the portion which is to be pooled to meet common objectives like day-to-day expenses or long-term goals like saving for a house. Without a plan. Sales of consumer durables. Instead of daily pay-outs. the respective tax slabs and regular expenditure levels. number of working years left. which is why they do not end up vastly ahead of single-income families in the long run. there is one vital difference. you have to figure out the “what” and “when” of your wants. Investment planning: One big reason why double-incomes do not translate into double wealth is because most working couples do not follow a plan to reach financial goals. That is because taxes (on interest. which lists the names of both husband and wife in the passbook and includes two separate cash cards. proximity to goals and number of dependents. this arrangement works out naturally. Faced with the challenges of attitudinal differences. And last. Often. A think tank affiliated with an advertising firm opines that couples with separate wallets will feel freer to exercise their own wills. One is looking at the same factors like risk profile. in both cases is taxable. This will be the starting point of your investment planning. 1+1>2!). make a budget and divide the financial responsibilities between yourselves. which will in turn lead to greater financial liquidity. such as televisions. The couple intends to use the money for the down payment on a house. But they mostly falter. These changes in household budgetary patterns are affecting patterns in consumption as well. This strategy is sure to save a small amount in taxes. Here are some useful tips. The couple decided that since Sarita earned considerably less than Rakesh. Should you be buying a house first or a bigger car? Should you make a provision for your aged parents who are financially independent right now or worry about your own retirement? Once you have a plan. for example) on such investments will also be lower. As already mentioned. which used to run along lines of one to a household. it is to be made sure that the family’s living expenses are met by the large income and a considerable part or all of the smaller income is to be saved. . doubleincome households can take on more investment risks. Pooling of ULTIMATELY. double-income families can indeed perform that unlikely math magic (i. Doubleincome households have much more to put away in equity for growth. since the income. has attracted tens of thousands of double-income couples as customers. providing for spouse’s needs and that of the dependents. The bottom line is to look at that second income as a means to create wealth rather than as a licence to binge. Unlike the US. Ultimately. If they are adequately insured. are now increasingly aimed at one unit per person. how do you combine your incomes to best advantage? Crucial to the success of leveraging your double-income is instituting a system that efficiently divides financial responsibilities. However. it is left to the couple to work out a strategy among them selves which will best suit their finance management in We the most amicable way. Investment in any taxable investment products should be done by the person in the lower tax bracket. you can make course corrections.e. Grow it: Investments by a double-income household are not inherently different from those made by a single-income household. A household budget account plan offered by one major bank. if it is the wife’s income that is lower. income is desirable. Tax planning helps plug this to some extent. As you increasingly start generating surpluses for investments. With just a little restraint and some astute planning. they would save all her income. Couples should avoid merging their funds since it makes determining tax liability confusing and computing capital gains difficult. It is important to agree on your financial goals and prioritise these. you might end up losing money. IT IS LEFT TO THE COUPLE TO WORK OUT A STRATEGY AMONG THEMSELVES WHICH WILL BEST SUIT THEIR FINANCE MANAGEMENT IN THE MOST AMICABLE WAY. Travel agents’ and other services are being used by more and more of married individuals rather than couples. as in the case of web professional Saritha Sekar and Rakesh Gautam.
So find ways to defuse the situation. According to editor and founder of office-politics. “The office where politics do not exist does not exist. Biswas STRATEGIES TO HELP YOU SURVIVE hen Shalini took up her first job at a multinational company she was fresh out of college and new to the corporate culture. First. author of Detox Your Career.” Having said that. This will How to overcome your colleagues’ intrigues. you can expect to encounter similar situations in varying degrees at every workplace. become the order of the day. Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 .W 5 14 OFFICE POLITICS By Lesley D. she also snatched the project from under Shalini’s nose.com. promptly and unethically passed Shalini’s idea as her own. you could try two things. writes. backbiting to put a colleague at a disadvantage. To her horror. Presuming it to be a great workplace she not only shared her lunch with them and invited them over to her birthday party. As competition peaks at the workplace. so quitting your job isn’t a viable solution. Considering that the political game is a part of every office set-up. and not only stole all the praise for the bright idea. Do not quit: Negotiating office politics and surviving in a workplace reeking with snoops and bullies can be stressful and leave you with a bitter experience for life that might have you contemplating even quitting your job. Patrick Frosyth. Here are five tested strategies to navigate this maze that will help you survive and shine in a toxic political workplace. one of her colleagues whom she considered her good friend and confidante. bullying to make their life miserable and plain ignoring. But sticking it out might take its toll on you. it doesn’t mean you allow the situation to overwhelm you. Unethical practices like stealing others’ ideas and credits. She was friendly and happy that many of her colleagues reciprocated her warmth. so do office politics. bury yourself in work and ignore what goes on. but also discussed her new ideas with her colleagues.
Chances are that they will tell you but if they don’t. they try and pull you down. Instead of whining and complaining to your managers. you could downsize the person out to get you. To avoid the horror of backstabbing. clearly define your areas of work and don’t intrude or allow others to intervene. experts advise having a candid conversation and sorting things out. If you help them grow their potentials so that they too feel equally deserving for whatever’s at stake. 15 help you rise above their taunts. you don’t recognise the person who is playing dirty games. It could be a good idea to try defusing the bomb at social parties when the atmosphere is more informal and relaxed. Find the reason: There are a range of politics that go on at office. What is it that is disturbing you? Are you being disliked or shunned? Most of the time. Second. Some might try to be overtly friendly to please you and in turn. Recognise the politician: Most often. be alert. In the case of job insecurities like IN TODAY’S WORK CULTURE. be alert. If you’re working as a team. is anyone overhearing your conversation? Such cues point to the suspected person. SHOW OFF YOUR SKILL AS A COMPETENT PROBLEM-SOLVER AND TRY TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM YOURSELF. you may document their abuse and file a complaint with your seniors. Give others a chance to explain their ideas and find ways to incorporate as much as possible. like in Shalini’s case. if you have the ability to handle office politics.” If the other person is convinced you’re not trying to run them down. Lock secret documents and private data securely in folders. Beware of getting blown away by sweet talk and restrict your conversation at social gatherings. When you’re on the phone. could well be manipulated and designed to upset you. you have an evidence. If someone is too nosy and keeps peeking over your desk. get someone to intervene because a negative environment isn’t only depressing it also slows down progress. and if it is stolen. Over a cup of coffee. Talk it over or e-mail the person concerned asking to sort things out. show off your skill as a competent problem-solver and try to solve the problem yourself. Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . Take behavioural cues these politicians offer. don’t take sides and decline from commenting when your opinion is sought. ask the persons what is troubling them or what is the problem they have with you. “Being nice can be the most effective tool for success when dealing with office politics which is used with the objective of gaining advantage in the work environment. it’s considered an asset. IT’S CONSIDERED AN ASSET. In case the remark is genuine. Be careful! Always inform your seniors of your idea so that they are aware that it belongs to you. Sometimes. This will clear the doubts if you are being misled. IF YOU HAVE THE ABILITY TO HANDLE OFFICE POLITICS. job insecurity makes colleagues behave in suspicious ways. If someone feels that you’re better skilled than they or have a greater chance of promotion. It’s important to understand that you’re interacting with human beings who have different perspectives. Always confront the speaker in the presence of the bearer. Care to consider their outlooks if you’re working as a team because your boss wants the project completed and it requires teamwork. According to Rolin Koval. But if you’re worried about being dragged into unnecessary controversy. the problem can be sorted out. Another reason for envy is your rapport with your boss. By being accommodating. Don’t be too trusting and never let anyone in on your ideas and project details. Get to the root of the problem before it blows out of all proportion. find out why the person has made it. the boss. Use it to your advantage: In today’s work culture. from the very outset. Donʼt believe what you hear: Remarks carried by colleagues who pose as well-wishers. This makes colleagues insecure of their own positions in the organisation as they see you more eligible for all the advantages they are competing for. you might have unknowingly harmed someone or hurt them.these. INSTEAD OF WHINING AND COMPLAINING TO YOUR MANAGERS. Approach the person with a clear mind and be open to his or her outlook. while others might be out to get you. the chances are that they will also see sense in coming to a solution because even the politicians don’t We always enjoy this role. coauthor of The Power of Nice.
pineapple “Okay!” I said smiling at my handsome I tapped my fingers on the table husband as I put the bhindi back in the trifle for impatiently as I waited for my system to fridge and took out the methi. I was half an hour made because Puneet didn’t like it too much. We’d have glancing my way as I breathlessly slid into my seat stuffed bhindi. Ah! My eyes had fell on the “Monday blues. What should I cook months of marriage – junk that I want to get rid of. much even his casual touch still excited me. salad and pineapple eyes were fixed on her own computer stuffed trifle for dessert sound?” I asked. N. cleared the table and put the leftovers away. My heart was beating fast and dessert alu. meeting. today? It was Sunday and it had to be a But Puneet wanted to go and so we went. Pav bhaji? I didn’t have he sulks! enough tomatoes. Paneer mattar? But we had had can’t refuse Puneet anything and I can’t bear it when that last Sunday. sweet corn around.” tonight and come back only on Monday morning! I wasn’t ecstatic about the prospect of the visit to So I cannot work this weekend. but I always had something planned for Sunday hadn’t managed to finish it all. I gave a loud groan and put my head had heard of which had opened on S. system.” the market because I don’t like buying second-hand “But Sharma sir will be even more furious with T 18 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . catching up with stuff I should have done the one! Puneet napped after breakfast on Sundays and previous week and writing an overdue report. “Anyone this weekend and was looking forward to the trip so can go and set up a stall and sell anything they want much! to. stuffed bhindi. As I said. parathas. I would I had spent the week working harder than I ever have loved to have a nap.” Puneet said blithely. A pile so big that I had no hope of “How does his arm around my waist and swung me even reading through it by 11.” he told me. and her mind was obviously far bhindi. Come Friday afternoons.STORY SHORT Being Myself Akshaya was besotted by her husband’s love – till Jyotsna put her wise to him. if I didn’t. screenon her own preparation for the team “Great! But make it methi-alu instead of away salad and bhindi. but fat chance of having had. him enough to make the small sacrifice. staring stuff and haven’t yet accumulated – after just six into the vegetable bin.m. when the next Friday came around. dal. Road. By Kasturi Rangachari I stood at the open door of the fridge. unprepared for a meeting! besides. Akshaya?” asked Shivangi net bag full of ladies’ fingers. “We are…were…are…supposed to leave the other stalls. dal. I over ate and felt heavy and lazy after I had Sharma sir. It was lovely to feel how “Not exactly. Today it was to go to the new market he evening. Puneet had planned a getaway “It is like a garage sale.” I said and turned on my soup. I was I asked. I hated methiwake up. “I haven’t prepared for the “How does sweet corn soup. down on my table. he would sulk and that would spoil my whole day! he meeting was a disaster and I still hadn’t Lunch was good even if I didn’t have any methirecovered from the reaming out I got from alu. I would do it! I loved in my five years at SigmaWorld. my favourite dish which I hardly ever in the cabin we shared in office. I smiled. late and I had a pile of work to get through before “What’s today’s lunch menu?” Puneet the 11 a. but if it made my husband happy for my hands were clammy. leaders’ appraisal meeting.” Shivangi nodded absently. Her parathas. I special meal.” I told they have at home and to buy things they fancy from Shivangi. For the first time sound?” me to cook it for him. monthly meeting of team came up behind me and asked as he put heads. Many people go there to sell off anything extra “He’s booked us into a resort near Kashid.
I was going to have a romantic weekend with my gorgeous husband! On Monday. But he seems to talk about his own work a lot! You are always full of the stories he has told you!” I hesitated. sexy nighties and “the other stuff I got you last month” consisted of naughty lingerie which he had bought me from Victoria’s Secret outlet in New York where he had gone on work the previous month. a few tops. girl!” “You’ll understand when you get married.” I grumbled to Shivangi. when I’ve been ill. I worked hard the next couple of days. “Don’t give others problems because you haven’t finished your work or you expect them to cover for you!” “I don’t expect others to cover for me…” I began angrily. To tell the truth I wasn’t particularly comfortable in them – I am more the girl-next-door than a sex siren! – but such outfits turned Puneet on and that was that as far as I was concerned! I smiled at him.you if you don’t give him the report first thing Monday morning. But I also knew that it would be a long time before he forgave me for my lapse. Damn the report and forget Sharma sir! I wasn’t going to disappoint Puneet. “He should understand. Arnab was right. I’m just a programmer. had just come into our cabin with some papers in his hand.” I said to him stiffly. “It’s just that a charismatic man like Puneet is much more interesting than an ordinary employee of SigmaWorld like me!” “You need to have your head checked to. you do. “Listen woman!” she finally gasped.” “Funny. clients whom I never see. “I know!” “Did you tell Puneet about the mess you are in? Give him some warning that you may have to postpone the Kashid trip?” “N. but you wanted to go home early one evening because you had a party to attend and the other two times because Puneet called and told you that he had taken the afternoon off.no.” Arnab looked exasperated. Two pairs of jeans. much to Puneet’s irritation. Akshi!” he called out as soon as he saw me. He’s got this exciting job in PR where he gets to meet celebrities! Exciting people! But me. My heart beat fast and I had an idiotic smile on my face.” A rnab. “Oh yes. yes…But his work is different. “two of these and the other stuff I got you last month! I don’t think we need anything else!” The “these” were two wispy. “I’m sorry. Puneet was already back and had the music on loud as he packed for our weekend trip. When I went home. Akshaya!” my friend pointed out. if your husband is as wonderful as mine!” Shivangi just snorted in reply. I now supervise a team that writes code.” I had nothing to say. We’ll eat at some place on the way…” “You’ve packed for me?” “Yes. Women want the equal pay and they grumble . “Then either quit or don’t accept promotions that mean more work!” he snapped with acerbity. but I’ve filled in for you too…” “Yes. I can’t give my everything to my work any longer. “That is. and finished it. “Hi. Sharma sir was too stunned to say much when I told him that I hadn’t finished the report. “But we men sometimes get fed up. you know. picked up a change of clothes and a towel and rushed to the bathroom. But I’m really a nobody compared to Puneet!” Shivangi gaped at me. “Don’t act all hurt. so you just have a bath and change and we can leave. but the look he gave me showed how disappointed he was in me. “I filled in for you thrice last month when you had to go home early. “I’m married now and have a home to run and a husband to think of.” he said. “I’ve packed for you too. remember?” “Yes. another team leader. Akshaya.” he smiled naughtily and fluttered something between his fingers. “Well. staying in the office late.” “Why on earth not?” “He doesn’t like me talking about my work once I am home. transparent.. He didn’t mention it to me or comment on it and I knew that meant that the report was all right.. I just write codes for clients living across the world. Okay. but Arnab interrupted me.” he said. “I’ll see that it doesn’t happen again.” I assured my friend with a smile. “I’m not putting myself down!” I protested. your swimsuit and. I didn’t have the guts to go and give it to sir myself and so I went and left it on his desk when he was away for lunch. “Talk of putting oneself down!” I shrugged.
Jyotsna. Puneet would think that I didn’t fact.” stunned. brought me back to the present. you know. “So you can flat. And sitting wants me to quit. I was able to attend “He’s right. called on Saturday morning And.” said independent. love him. When she had been at be sullen. Surely I should listen to him? facing me was Jyotsna looking even more gorgeous Won’t our home be a happier one if I am a full-time than she had looked the last time I had seen her a homemaker?” year ago.. because I didn’t want to take work And doesn’t he have a monthly boys’ night out on a home. “didn’t he my colleagues to help me. “I am not pulling my weight here. “Jyotsna is coming here after so long. She saw me and smiled and waved and I “Are you the type to be happy cooking. “I’m so glad you could make it!” have achieved and of being financially “No reason she couldn’t. making a lot of noise. I loved and admired everything about Jyotsna. “that you are talking about – we didn’t create them ourselves! Yes. job. But. creating went up to the table. In job.” Puneet said.” “Well. go and meet your friend.” in my thoughts. when our kids are ill…” I Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 21 . I can’t possibly come. because I wanted others to give their Saturday?” presentation first so as to give me more time to “Yes. “Nature gave us the ‘problems’. but they also want to do less work and get special consideration because of their many problems. Because I wanted to go go golfing with his friends one weekend last month? home early. He earns enough and has bought a promotion!” “I have to go. Puneet says that the weekends are our time Shivangi was talking about – yet! – but I still together. who was a few years older Shivangi watched me in silence for a minute and and whine about the glass ceiling. I gave more time to looked at me “You too have been doing things…and Puneet and less to my work sometimes! But absolutely Jyotsna is a good friend…” surely that was all right for a newly-married stunned. Surely Puneet can manage to be by himself for a couple of hours! Tell him to set something up with the tuned out their argument and became immersed guys. but…that’s different! Those guys have been prepare my own – it was all because I didn’t want to doing these things for ages and he can’t disappoint Puneet by saying that I was get out of them just because he is married! busy when he wanted me to spend time Shivangi His friends will say that he is henpecked!” with him.I then put her arm around my shoulder. As a result. I had none of the problems “No. friends sitting at a big table to one side of the “I know…but I’m married now and my husband restaurant. wondering if I should tell for five years and asked him to come over so that they Shivangi and then I decided to do so. “Puneet will be disappointed woman? Or…was it? “Leave your and I can’t bear that.” I said and ignored “Akshaya? He’s gone..” she said. we need special consideration when we are pregnant.” she gasped. when we’ve just delivered. But if I refused. I’ll drop Shivangi looked at me absolutely you on the way. over lunch. “You don’t have to take an immediate decision. He’d be miserable and would mope and just as Shivangi did. David. Jyotsna is in town! She called me and asked me to organise lunch with the gang. I know that you are proud of what you me. “Except that weekends have been no real reason to? It will be different when you have declared billing and cooing time by hubby dear!” a baby – but now?” There was a sharp note in her voice. Will you let all that go when there is Shivangi.” needed “special consideration” and often wanted “But.” she made quotation marks in the air for the word. but Jyotsna Put like that I knew that I didn’t want to quit my smiled her usual gentle smile. “Forget it. when we are breastfeeding. a beautiful home and taking up hobbies? No? I “They told me you weren’t coming and I was so thought so! Then your home won’t be a happier one disappointed!” she said. Akshaya!” Shivangi countered. Jyotsna. getting up and hugging if you resign.” I hesitated. as it turned out.” Shivangi job? But…but Shivangi’s snort. I shrugged. “Leave your job? But…but you’ve worked your arse off for five years and have just got walked into Piccadilly and quickly spotted my your first promotion!” she gasped. actually. SigmaWorld. I loved that smile. And I’ll give you something more pleasant to think about.” I said with a you’ve worked the get-together because Puneet’s best sigh. your arse off friend.” Shivangi frowned thoughtfully. I sighed. So Saturday it’s a get-together for lunch at Piccadilly!” “Oh. and have just could discuss the programme for the next “And…Puneet is talking of my leaving my got your first college alumni meeting. I’d have to leave Puneet…and it’s the weekend…” “Oh don’t be silly. we are women!” it was Shivangi’s turn to snap.
but Shivangi and I remained seated. will you ever wear it? Actually. we had both been devastated. “I haven’t really talked to you since your wedding. “In our house. “But I remember how gorgeous you always looked in red and so – here!” I held out a carry bag containing the bright red kurta I had bought for her. Akshaya.” I went on. Her eyes lit up. “Puneet is absolutely great! He’s wonderful in every possible way!” “Yeah. it’s daddy for the fun times and me for everything else!” The girls got up one by one. So he can’t buy me a diamond bracelet and plan a holiday for two on a cruise boat for my birthday as Avinash did for yours last year – but he’s as loving and as . Shivangi picked up the bill. “The only difference between Puneet and Avinash is that Puneet isn’t as rich as your crorepati husband. though you hate all those machines there! He doesn’t want you to work because he wants you all to himself and so you gave up your job. “Just as the fact that Avinash is possessive of you. “I have to leave. “It shows that he adores me!” I paused a moment and smiled at my friend.” “How come you were able to come?” asked Jyotsna. Akshaya?” she asked with a strange look on her face. I bought it because I couldn’t resist it!” Jyotsna laughed.” said Shivangi caustically.” “Lucky you!” grumbled Alpana. you learnt to cook his favourite dishes from your mother-in-law – you live to make him happy. don’t you? And I’m doing the same thing!” Jyotsna leaned forward and I took her hand and clasped it tightly as I went on. Puneet wants her all to himself then. shows that he adores you! And. picking up her cellphone and looking around for her handbag. “No.than I. Jyotsna.” said Jyotsna.” protested Jyotsna. “With whom have you left her?” “With hubby Vinod. “How is Avinash?” “No. Jyotsna. “He adores Akshaya. “Is he possessive. “Of course. “Tell us all your news.” said Shivangi as she handed over her credit card to the waiter together with the bill.” “So you do just as Puneet wants you to?” Jyotsna still had that strange look on her face as she asked me the question. “Let’s have coffee before we leave. She has a cold and slight fever. so the conversation was lively and there was a lot of laughter.” I suggested as the others said their farewells and left. I am!” I exclaimed. “I have to take my Rishika to the doctor’s. Avinash likes you to wear only pastel colours and you do that – except today for some reason! He likes you to look slim and trim and so you go to the gym. S he opened the bag and took out the kurta. I know that you’re married to a crorepati. We were much closer to Jyotsna than the others and we wanted some more time with her. “Fine!” said Jyotsna. “I know that Avinash only likes you in pastel colours. just like you. Everyone in the group had worked in SigmaWorld and we were all good friends. later. someone we took all our troubles and problems to. you follow IPL matches though you hate cricket. of course. he is and I love it!” I exclaimed. weekends are off limits for Akshaya’s friends.” said Shivangi.” said Padmasini reluctantly. Normally. girl?” “Oh. He’s perfectly trained now! He’s as good with Rishika as I am. but this is my treat. “Hey. “I love this kurta. “Yes. I love doing everything as he wants me to because I want to make him happy. “You’re looking great!” I said to Jyotsna who was dressed in a turquoise blue salwar-kameez. He doesn’t want to let her out of his sight! You’re lucky to see her. We ordered lunch and. You watch action films instead of the romantic ones you enjoy. You bet I’ll wear it!” I plonked myself down and greeted the others. We ordered coffee and sat back. I want to hear about you. had been a mentor as much as a friend to both of us. I’ll pay. “Yes! Just as you do! I mean. Are you happy. “Haven’t you noticed that I’m not dressed in a light pastel colour?” she demanded. So. When she had left to get married and move to Delhi three years ago.” Jyotsna turned to me. I knew that I was being stupid.
my in-laws and my husband.” either Shivangi no I said anything and after I bristled. hadn’t made Avinash feel was never asked my opinion on anything because it secure and loved as I thought that it would. “Akshaya. for the weekend. I simply become a way of life for him. I began to miss the things I take away some of the attention I gave had given up without a struggle. She For instance. So I was submissive and thoughts. “He didn’t know that I had a report to staring into the distance for a few moments. And he wanted began to find that humiliating. “That’s not normal. Now that than mine! was gone.” stopped playing the sitar because none of my inI gasped. I lacked self-confidence from the presumed that I’d get a job and work…till I beginning. I didn’t want to create waves We all fell silent.” “Yes. I came back feeling fresh and full “Don’t make the mistake I made. I began to he didn’t want any kids because that would own!” resent Avinash. charismatic. But Avinash told me that he “That’s would not be the correct ones – after all.” she “I…I didn’t tell him. It had was presumed that I would be my husband’s echo. I realised then that my passivity. I wanted my entire attention…and so I because he had married a rich.” “Take what?” “Avinash’s so-called ‘love’!” “So-called…love?” “Yes. I had doesn’t like man whom everyone respected and so I enjoyed my work. I hope the fact that I have stood up to him will that I need to be! And by deciding everything for make him rethink matters and that he’ll realise that me. “He loves you and wants to protect you’ll get a divorce or something?” you….. So what was wrong with his taking that decision?” Shivangi cleared her throat. “But he loves to talk about his own!” but was content to be whatever her husband wanted Jyotsna sat back and sighed.” said Shivangi laws liked classical music. Akshaya.” I froze. absorbed in our own her work at in my new family. home. if necessary…but I hope it won’t come to “But I don’t want to be protected! I’m not so weak that. “But happy. I us. I couldn’t take it any longer. Jyotsna went on. but the new flat Avinash bought for us was done up “No.N of energy. “Exactly like her to be! He took away my identity. successful dropped my plans of working. finish!” I exclaimed. “Wh. cooled on the table in front of us. I had him. quietly.” talking about “Besides. it isn’t.” said.” Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 25 wonderful! You told us that Avinash …” “Akshaya…” interrupted Jyotsna. Avinash. It is smothering me!” .” everyone was happy – by ‘everyone’ I “When did you decide to leave Shivangi mean. “It took me three years to “How come?” asked Jyotsna. who really had no personality of her own Jyotsna. he loves to wasn’t getting the freedom I needed and I “When he told me some weeks ago that talk about his wasn’t being appreciated. That he’ll come to his senses…” “But all decisions taken for us need not do that! Shivangi and I both held Jyotsna’s hands. I giving in on every issue. deep colours. The coffee we hadn’t even a couple of weeks ago and insisted that we go out noticed. who agreed to everything about her work at home.” I found my voice. I was afraid that my decisions had a baby. my completely in white and I found that depressing. realise that Avinash didn’t actually love me. I moved to Delhi after we got married.. my right to live as I want to!” marriage. Puneet decided that I needed a break grasped them back. When I resigned from SigmaWorld and “But it wasn’t completely Avinash’s fault.” I said. I felt smothered by Avinash’s love. he’s taking away my voice. Avinash?” I asked in a hushed tone. Was that particular weekend the best time for a getaway weekend? Puneet realised that you needed a break – that shows that he is considerate and caring – but planning that weekend when you had a deadline to finish a report after a disastrous appraisal meeting doesn’t show that he respects the work you are doing. I liked rich. “I’ve left Avinash! Last month. be truthful. I was informed “But slowly I realised that I wasn’t still stunned by what my friend had just told Jyotsna.what?” stuttered Shivangi “Yes. “I think you are being unfair to “You mean…you’ll never go back to him? That Avinash. I thought…I suppose. “He loved a fantasy and tried to make me into “And why didn’t you?” that fantasy – a woman who was as soft as the “That’s because he doesn’t like Akshaya talking pastel colours she wore.” more and more from me. It had given me Akshaya was sure that his decisions would be better independence and individuality.” Shivangi informed he said. my right over my he has made an absurd demand on me and our own life.
selfbeliefs. Many of you would agree that at times words even lead to conflict. This incident set me thinking about how much we do to make ourselves look good from the outside and we pay so little attention to our diction. She had quite a strange way with words. “Don’t let Puneet’s love take away your identity. Apply your thinking before giving a voice to your words. When I made methi-alu for Puneet. of course! Stand up for yourself from the beginning. Besides. cases. Beauty with brains is always likable. At first. Later.” I promised her that I wouldn’t. our speech is the expression of who we are as a person. it can have unwanted consequences. Ways to improve speech Speak slowly and clearly. Good speaking skills are a must for a pleasing personality. hairdo and accessories. say. inclinations and much more. It is selfdefeating to undermine the importance of speech. a person acquires the local parlance unconsciously. And I gave my opinion on things and did not just laughingly accept whatever Puneet said. And I am revelling in it. Learn to pronounce words correctly. It was quite difficult to keep my eyes off her. In many 26 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . I began to talk about my work and began to nap before any Sunday outing. She looked the picture of perfection. he began to accept the new. Keeping quiet is a better option when you are not sure about something. Try to limit body movement while speaking. One expected a refined way of speaking from this enchanting woman. He would even accuse me of having changed. his or her value system. I made bhindi for myself. In small ways. Taking decisions and standing up for herself do not come easy to her after years of being passive – but she is revelling in it now. In reality.Jyotsna said in a tight voice. maintain a diplomatic silence. Most of the time you cannot help it but it spoils your language forever. “Puneet isn’t…I mean…” my voice trailed away. I began to do things as I wanted to. Mostly. “Isn’t like Avinash? I’m glad that he is not. But it appears that he does have a tendency to ride rough shod over you. Even our beauty queens go through rigorous practice to improve their diction before they go to participate in beauty pageants because they realise that beauty is not just skin deep! – Manisha Prakash t a party held some time back. But speech divulges all. Revelling in being herself! We A IT’S ONLY WORDS. Don’t let things go as far as they have for Avinash and myself. giving time and attention to speech is a must. he was taken aback and sometimes he sulked. when I continued to be loving and considerate. So. At best. it is time you paid attention to your words. Everyone wants to have variety in a discussion. People know us because of what we say. more so because it did not go with her appearance. a good way of speaking also helps in winning friends and influencing people. Use your words when required. And Jyotsna has as much to do as Avinash does. Make-up and attire does not do much to contribute to a person's personality: it only adds to your person in ways of making you more attractive. Brush up on your current affairs and knowledge about the world around you. So it would be wise to use them judiciously. In many ways. A Delhi person will speak in a different manner compared to. are you one of those people who is all glitter and shine but only till she opens her mouth? If so. Try to read good books and magazines. Your words will cheat you if you are ignorant... It informs about the educational qualifications of a person.” I felt obliged to defend Puneet. Let others also have their turn at speaking. a person from Chennai. But. AND WORDS ARE ALL I HAVE Here’s how to refine your speech to refine yourself. selfconfident me. people get bored with trivia and gossip. they still have a lot of adjustment to do. give a smile or a nod. I didn’t tell her or Shivangi that Puneet had said that he didn’t want kids for a long time! I started the next day. taking care while speaking helps in many ways. For someone who wants to have refined ways. wife of one of my husband's friends. But not for long! Her whole persona turned repulsive the moment she opened her mouth to say something. She spoke in a parlance which was quite irritating. Don't rush with words. I chanced upon this stunningly beautiful woman. Revelling in being myself! It took a while for Avinash to understand why Jyotsna left him and though he came to talk to her and she has gone back to him.in the nicest possible way. When you are among gossipmongers and have no choice. Indulging in gossip only gives temporary pleasure. as she was in one of the choicest ensembles with striking danglers hanging from her ears and just the right kind of make-up.
Please advise. With time. The latch had not closed properly. be a trying and confusing time. worry or doubt with us and WE will help you find a way out — to a happier. always latch the bathroom properly when using it! This column is especially for teenagers. Should I too do the same or talk to him to clear the matter up? It was an unfortunate mistake. everyone is a late starter in the family and it is no cause for worry. it may just be a matter of waiting. I am a 16-year-old girl. I smile at him a lot also to show I like him. I feel terrible that the servant was given a bad name for nothing at all. A wrong decision. I was shocked to catch my younger 15-year-old brother pilfering cash from Mom’s handbag. you must speak to your mother privately. His behaviour cannot be excused. otherwise. healthier and more successful adult life. they find the other sex very alluring. Dad will surely punish my brother severely.etc. Some days back. Should I just tell him that I love him? Is it wrong for a girl to make the first move? We are both 17 years old. There is no harm in consulting a doctor who can access your condition accurately and suggest treatment if necessary. In the meanwhile. But if I tell my parents. And yes. He is behaving normally and seems to have put the incident behind him. If you have not got your periods even when you are a year older. and deal with both your brother and the servant in the best possible manner. Send your problems to: WOMAN’S ERA E-3. It will cause unnecessary embarrassment. This is driving me crazy. you should have started your menarche by now. perhaps this is a hereditary trend. I feel very ashamed that he had seen me without any clothes. or an indiscreet move. I do not want this as he is a good kid. I am his 17-yearold elder sister. He claimed that the pocket money Dad gave him was too little to meet his expenses and so. New Delhi-110 055 Womansera. play hard to get. He begged me not to tell my parents and that he would never steal again. My mother says. He may find you attractive but may not want to be your exclusive boyfriend. boys and dating. Let her take the matter out of your hands. Such unintentional accidents happen. I do not know what to do. he will come to you. When I confronted him. I try to talk to him on every small pretext. Share your problem. There are so many questions which seem to evade solutions. and had suspected our servant who they sacked. clearing doubts. but I still cannot find out whether he likes me too. suddenly my cousin brother pushed open the bathroom door. and you should not feel guilty or ashamed about it. and that the servant was innocent. Adolescence can.com A Q & A I am in a real fix. my aunt and her son had come to stay with us for a week. One morning. have a good time with other friends. If you have got the I really love a boy in our class (12th std) very much. Bide your time. my parents were missing money from their purses. Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 secondary signs of sexual maturity like growing breasts. borrowing his notes.QA & TEEN ACHE TEEN C E H I am a 17-year-old girl who has not yet started her periods. It is wise and correct on the part of your cousin to ignore it. For some time. we know. It is clear that this boy is not ready to have a girlfriend. 27 . When girls start thinking about romance. It is important that you set things right with the servant who will be suffering agony with the false accusations. taking more care not to be caught? If he does not agree to confess. Both he and I were shocked and he beat a hasty retreat. especially when he kept silent when an innocent person was made the scapegoat. he resorted to taking the money. Put it out of your mind and stop feeling guilty . it is definitely important to get medical opinion. give him a long leash. Do not rake it up or make a big issue of it by talking about it with him. so to say. but if it is delayed in your other family members. Don’t declare your interest and “love” to this boy. You will embarrass him and even scare him away from you for good. boys are usually only interested in cars and football. Jhandewala Estate. can spell disaster and ruin a life. He is one of the smartest and most popular guys. He seems to be a decent guy. Last week. This is understandable. It could make trouble for him. In a couple of years though. She was inconsolable. if he likes you. I feel worried and left out because all my friends have done so. Coax your brother to confess to your mother who will perhaps be more lenient with him. My friend even asked him point-blank but he didn’t answer at all. What guarantee is there that he will not be stealing again. when I was bathing. By normal standards. he confessed that he had been stealing earlier too. Girls mature sexually and emotionally earlier than boys. underarm and pubic hair.
Attention. to get what you want out of life.. .AND THE WINNER IS. all ye job-seekers. you’ve got to work. lend me your ears. for I have a few tips which just might give you the cutting edge and ensure that your foray into a career will not be with too many hiccups. Really hard.. How not to just sit around – and get a move on! By Dr Rumy Agarwal T his is for those of my young friends for whom the wonder years have come to an end and it is time to step out into the real world of adulthood where. and work hard.
Be obedient but not passive: Don’t ever project the helpless, content-to-flow-with-the-tide image cos, if you do, you will just keep flowing! You will never be singled out for being given additional respon sibility and, as it follows, neither for promotions (especially out of turn!). Strut your stuff, fellas, show your bosses that you’ve got what it takes and, for that, you need to show spunk, enthusiasm and initiative. For instance, if there is any problem at work, don’t rush to inform your boss. Think about the problem, view it from all angles and try to think of a practical solution and then, and only then, go to Big Daddy with information and suggestions to solve the problem). Try it and see the difference it makes. At once, your ratings in the boss’s eyes are buoyed! “Here’s a feisty one,” thinks he. He knows then that you can be relied upon for new assignments – and the perks (a favourable Confi dential Report, a good word, a raise in salary, etc) just follow! Remember, a laid-back attitude at work is a sure-shot way of landing up to disuse atrophy – DON’T have it. Perk up and go sniffing around for situations which need rectification ’cos it is these “situations”, these problems, which will give you the opportunity to showcase your talents. Move, guys, move! Be ready to experiment: Y’know, you don’t always HAVE to stick to age-old ways of doing things. If you feel that a certain method has outlived its utility or is overused for want of anything better, have the guts to change it. If it succeeds, you’ve hit pay dirt; in case it doesn’t, at least you’ve proved that your creativity is not at a dead end! And that counts for something, especially in the long run. Perform beyond expectations: Abstruse though it may sound, the boss rarely gives a promotion for a job performed well as per norms or expectations; what he looks out for, and rewards, is the spark to stray from the path of the pedestrian. Look,
IF YOU WANT TO BE COUNTED AMONG THE MOVERS AND SHAKERS, BE MORE GUNG-HO ABOUT YOURSELF. BE PREPARED TO TAKE THAT ODD CHANCE – IT MAY BE JUST THE CATALYST YOU NEEDED.
his reasoning is that if you are doing your job adequately, it’s no big deal, ’cos he’s paying you for doing just that. Why the hell should he reward you? But if you give more of yourself to your work than is expected of you, well then, you do deserve a “pat on the back” (sometimes read as “promotion” or “increment”. If you have it, flaunt it: And I am talking about talent and potential, my friends, so no naughty smirks, okay? If you feel that you have something to offer to your work by way of aptitude or ingenuity, then go ahead, bring it to the boss’s notice (but be discreet – neither pompous nor apologetic). Have self-confidence and then hardsell yourself. In the professional world, the meek and humble do NOT rule the world ! Donʼt underestimate yourself: If you want to be counted among the Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010
movers and shakers, be more gungho about yourself. Be prepared to take that odd chance – it may be just the catalyst you needed. If there’s a challenging assignment to be given, put yourself up for it. If you are scared and nervous about your ability to handle it, tell yourself that it’s okay to be frightened but – what the hell – even if life comes up lemons, you can always make lemonade! Above all, be an eager learner; if you project complacence and boredom, that is what you will get from your boss too. Keep relationships at work in the right perspective: This is a tad intricate ’cos friendships are emotionbased and emotions are not governed by the little black book of professional etiquette, y’know. Anyway, maintaining the right balance (being buddy-buddy with some and distant with others, but polite and pleasant with all) is absolutely essential. And try to keep your work-related opinions and grievances to yourself – you never know when they might reach the wrong ears and you are left with a lot of eggs on your face. So, if you keep the nitty-gritty in mind, guys, you will be able to punch the right digits to get to the top. Remember, the boss usually bestows a kindly eye on the one who is a cut above the rest. So go on, be THAT We person. 29
A balancing act
An acrobat from internationally acclaimed circus company “Circus Oz” dismounts from his balancing act during a rehearsal of their new production for the opening night in Melbourne on 16 June. The circus without animals has performed in 26 different countries across five continents to over two million people.
This is the view of the Q4000 multipurpose oilfield intervention vessel, burning off material from the Deepwater Horizon wellhead near the disaster site in the Gulf of Mexico on 24 June. The rig had exploded on 20 April, spilling millions of gallons of crude into the Gulf.
An American surfs a wave during an international surfing event held at Sri Lanka’s coastal resort of Arugambay. With participation from surfers from the UK, Australia, Indonesia, Netherlands, Japan and New Zealand, the competition aims to promote the country’s east as a major tourist attraction.
An important exhibition explores the full career of film-maker Tim Burton through hundreds of art works that spectacularly illuminate his creative vision behind the movies Beetlejuice Batman, Edward Scissorhands, Charlie and Chocolate Factory and Alice in Wonderland.
▼ ▼ ▼
Celebrating with fire ▼
A Belarussian in traditional clothing jumps over a fire while celebrating Ivan Kupala Night on 24 June, a traditional Slavic holiday, marking midsummer, outside the town of Dobrush.
Melbourne winter masterpieces
The Edges of the world
An actor performs during the opening of “King Kong 360 3-D” at Universal Studios in Hollywood, California on 29 June.
What a performance!
A gallery assistant dips her toe into the outdoor pool installation entitled “H2O-SfLv” by Brazilian artist Ernesto Neto, at the Hayward gallery in central London on 16 June. In the next picture Neto stands within one of his installations. The new exhibition forms part of the Festival Brazil at the Southbank centre” Art is today resurfacing all over the world, particularly in India.
The computer age
9-part self-portrait ▼
A collage of Polapan prints by artist Chuck Close is displayed at Sotheby’s during a preview of the Polaroid Collection in New York. The collection which the founder of Polaroid, Edwin Land began, was auctioned on 21-22 June.
Nicaraguan school children show their XO laptops at the Miguel Larreynaga school in the town of Tipitapa on 24 June. The one Laptop for Child Organisation (OLC) has distributed 17,000 Laptops in 150 public schools across the country.
Stress on sex education
A school teacher in Manila shows male and female reproductive systems models that she uses in teaching biology in her school. The next education Minister will be a Roman Catholic Philippines lay leader amid seething conflict between the government and the Church over sex education.
it was constructed on a pile of pebbles in 907 AD. Hundreds of boats were anchored along the quay. a long low building which was supposed to be designed and built A picturesque little French coastal town is a delightful summer attraction.T DIEPPE PRETTIEST OF CHANNEL PORTS he 170-kilometre-long drive from Paris took us through many quaint villages. On the west. Situated on the channel coast. Founded by the Vikings on the estuary of the river Arques. and gradually grew into a town after the Norman Conquest in 1066. to the fishing port of Dieppe. Jutting right into the sea is the Transmanche Terminal. by the banks of the river. the bustling old town is a little piece of history. it is bounded by towering white cliffs reminiscent of the cliffs of Dover. To the north. on the east. it is open to the English Channel. By Eva Bell Dieppe harbour .
St. Jacques church.
according to some secret architec tural formula. Its curved low roof and horizontal lines of the facade, mirror the layers of flint in the cliffs behind. A board indicates that Camille Pissaro who was commissioned to paint the harbour, set up his easel at this vantage point and produced six beautiful paintings of this splendid scene. High up on the cliff is the sandstone and flint castle which dominates the town. It was constructed by a Captain Desmarest in 1435 to defend the town from the English, during the 100-Year War. It then became the seat of the government during the French Revolution, and thereafter served as a prison. Today, this cavernous old castle is called the Castle Museum, and houses an exquisite collection of ivories and impressionist paintings by Pissaro, Renoir and Sickett along with priceless maritime maps and artifacts. It takes a couple of hours to wander leisurely through the eight spacious rooms that hold these treasures. In front of the castle is the Square du Canada. In this square is a multifaceted stele erected in 1927 in honour of the old friends of Dieppe, the Canadians. It traces the links between Dieppe and Canada since the 16th century.
From the Castle Esplanade one looks down at the long sea front, a vast bathing area since 1822. It also has a swimming pool. Two ferries The Dieppe and Sardinia Vera ply between here and New Haven, bringing holiday makers from England. It was the British who made swimming fashionable here since 1822. They used to commute by the cross channel ferry even in those days.
The beach here is quite unlike most sandy beaches, and is made up of tiny pebbles right down to the water. The blue green expanse of water is calm, warm and inviting. There are schemes for developing the waterfront with covered swim ming pools and other activities. The road in front of the beach is the Grand Rue which has been pedestrianised. On one side of this traffic-free boulevard are halftimbered houses built in the late 19th century, with a profusion of balconies and appendages, and overhanging roofs constructed in neo-Norman style. Of the many churches, St. Jacques Church was worth visiting. It was constructed between 12th and the 16th century, with a flamboyant Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010
TODAY, THIS CAVERNOUS OLD CASTLE IS CALLED THE CASTLE MUSEUM, AND HOUSES AN EXQUISITE COLLECTION OF IVORIES AND IMPRESSIONIST PAINTINGS BY PISSARO, RENOIR AND SICKETT ALONG WITH PRICELESS MARITIME MAPS AND ARTEFACTS.
Gothic style for the facade and the chancel. The nave is more sober, but several chapels surrounding it are decorated with grotesque motifs of the earliest French Renaissance. Le Pollet is the area on the other side of the river, which has been occupied by fishermen since the Middle Ages. The polletais (fisher folk) have their own costumes, songs and customs. Ever since the AngloFrench fleet razed Dieppe to the ground in 1694, there are no wooden half-timbered houses here. Now they live in sturdy flint houses with white 33
brick frontages. The streets are narrow and winding and have retained their old-world charm. Dieppe is one of the major exporters of herrings. Herring is supposed to be the ‘king of fish’ but the people here call it ‘chicken of Dieppe’ a major part of the French herring catch comes from here. But Dieppe will go down in history as a place where the Allied Forces received a crushing defeat from the Germans in World War II in their Operation Jubilee. On 19 August 1942, Allied forces consisting of Canadians, British and American troops mounted a raid on Dieppe. They were supported by destroyers in the channel and air squadrons. But they were forcefully and mercilessly repulsed by the Germans. The Allies
White cliffs of sandstone and flint.
Neo Norman style constructions overlooking the English Channel.
paid a frightful price with heavy losses of life and limb. The casualties were mostly Canadian. However, the lessons learnt from this defeat helped them plan new strategies. Two years later, when they landed at Normandy Beach on 6 June 1944, the Germans were defeated. The honour of liberating Dieppe was given to the 2nd Canadian Division on 1 September 1944. Annual commemorations are held to strengthen the ties between Canada and France. The Commonwealth War Graves Cemetery at Les Vertus is 5 kms south of Dieppe. 34
The Canadian connection with Dieppe began in the 16 century when two explorers from this town, Aubert and Verrazane, contributed to the discovery of Canada. Fishing and fur trading between the two countries began in the 17th century. Dieppe was the first port of call from Canada. Three nuns from Dieppe belonging to the Augustinian order opened the first hospital in Quebec, Canada. For those who would like to see Dieppe without wearing out their feet, a train trundles through town. But, for the more adventurous, a little bird emblem painted on the road guides Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010
the tourist on a 3 km trek, which includes historical and cultural sights and provides many leisure activities en route. We stopped at a park to see a group of old men playing Boules. A small red ball is targeted by a large silver ball. Whoever hits the red ball or is closest to the target is the winner. A referee measures the distances with a tape. Summer is the best time to visit Dieppe. It begins in March with the festival of Visu (dance, theatre and visual arts). In July is the Festival of the Sea. The Kite Festival in September ends the season. Dieppe is the prettiest of the Channel ports. Through the centuries, it has been occupied by Vikings, Normans and the English. The Anglo-Dutch fleet razed the town to the ground. But, like the proverbial Phoenix, it sprang back to life after France overthrew the English, developed its channel ports and prospered. It had a set-back during World War II during the German occupation, but was liberated in 1944. Dieppe remains both a busy port and a resort. There is always something happening here. “It is a wonderful place not just for a painter who loves life, movement and colour,” as Pissaro said, but for We everyone who loves the sea.
I am only 17 and am diabetic. My beauty problem is my skin which is dull and lifeless. Also from time to time I get an attack of small pimplelike rash which lasts for a fortnight and at that time my skin feels very oily. What should I do? Diabetes is a serious problem and at your age it is the hormonal changes, the problems related to diabetes and the medication you must be taking for it – add that to the pollution and other problems of the weather and it is not easy for skin to cope. Do consult a dermatologist for the pimple-like rash and for the oiliness of the skin. Be attentive to your skin’s needs – cleanse and tone regularly and avoid make-up items like blusher and compact. If you exfoliate and massage regularly your skin will improve. Also, try to eat healthy foods that are effective for your diabetes management as well.
skin infection that needs medicated products. Do consult a dermatologist for a lasting solution. In the meantime make a hair mask using dried neem leaves and a teaspoon of sandal wood powder. Add a generous amount of honey and mix with thick yoghurt. Cover your scalp and pile the hair on top for at least half an hour. Wash away with gentle products.
Q & A
When I lost a lot of weight I got terrible stretch marks on my arms and stomach. They look very ugly and although now I am slim I cannot wear sleeveless or low saris. Is there any permanent solution? Sudden loss of weight, or sometimes even with exercise, such a dramatic weight loss will lead to stretch marks. These can be covered to a limited extent by careful application of make-up but that is not always possible, especially for arms. You should think of approaching the dresses with see-through arms, and for a ‘permanent’ solution consult a good cosmetic surgery person who should take you through all your options surgically.
I have always had dandruff since I was a teenager. I try different shampoos and conditioners and it goes away for a few weeks and then comes back. I am really tired of it and want a permanent solution. What should I do? Uncured dandruff can lead to skin problems that eventually affect other parts of the body as well. If you have tried different hair care products and it keeps coming back it might be a
I am confused about keeping my face clean. I do use some make-up but clean it every night. I want to know if I should use an astringent and toner every day after cleansing it with cleansing milk? You have not mentioned your age. Irrespective of age though, cleansing of skin at the end of the day is always recommended. Often washing it with a gentle soap and removing all the make-up and grime is sufficient. When the skin is younger it does not need a toner but as we mature and nature is unable to produce all the necessary detoxifying and nourishing oils, it is necessary to aid the skin by giving it products like a mild soap-free cleanser, balancing toner and a nourishing night cream. When using cleansing milk ensure that all residual cleaning agents are removed from the skin.
● Never sit on wet bamboo because it is so soft that it can get damaged or lose its shape. do major cleaning. couches. Bamboo furniture is usually made through a process of cutting strips of bamboo. the panels are pressed CLEANING IT Bamboo needs to be cleaned just like any other hardwood. which could be as high as 30 to 40 feet. tables. Wait for a few days before you start using your furniture after cleaning. a colourless lacquer can be applied to protect it from dirt. stools. screens. is a strong and tough material that resists shrinkage and swelling and can hence be used to make furniture. chairs. the furniture’s shine can be restored. being eco-friendly. This kind of bamboo furniture resembles hardwood furniture and is sold in both light and dark shades and finishes. polish. boiling them in order to make them resilient to mildew and bugs and then gluing the strips together. sand with a fine-grit sandpaper until smooth and then rub with wax. We . which is then shaped into any kind of furniture. bathroom cabinets. ● Should you spill water or other liquids on your furniture. wax and paint your furniture regularly. ● Also. Bamboo has become a popular product in recent years. wear and tear and other harmful conditions. garden. Avoid using detergents. Bamboo fencing adds a touch of class to the garden it outlines. After they are stuck together edge to edge. Follow this regimen to clean the furniture ● Dust the furniture regularly to avoid dust from accumulating on the furniture. kitchen cabinets. desks. ● If the bamboo has cracked. it is advisable to treat them with a thin layer of UV-resistant stain to prevent decay and weathering. together in order to make a multilayer resembling wood. The best part of the furniture is that it has a style of its own. curtains. ● Refrain from wetting your furniture to prevent damage. it is easy to clean and maintain. Though sturdy and indestructible. it can be used regularly without causing any damage to the environment. workstations. Bamboo can also be used for fencing purposes in terrace flats and private homes. and is treated with high regard as a choice for decorating a room. ● Protect your bamboo furniture from the sun and rain as these may damage it. and more. Use a small dust brush or cloth and simply wipe over the surface to remove dust particles. By Shilpa Shanbhag amboo is the tallest grass that takes a year to reach its full height. which involves vacuuming off the dust that may get deposited in the crevices. BAMBOO FURNITURE Bamboo. ● Once all the visible dirt is removed. This should restore the piece to its original colour and shine. Bamboo is used to make beds. use a soft cloth or sponge soaked in soap water to clean the furniture. make sure you blot it dry immediately in order to prevent staining. ● At least once a year. and above all a house. which contain chemicals to prevent Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 damage to the surface of the bamboo furniture. ● To maintain the furniture’s golden colour. It then hardens and matures in the next four to seven years before it can be used to make bamboo blinds. As the grass grows quickly.DECORATIVE GRASS B 36 Furnishing with a natural grace. The furniture requires to be dusted at least once a week. ● By rubbing the furniture periodically with linseed or other furniture oil. But before erecting bamboo fences. fences and furniture.
Put off the heat and allow the sauce to cool to room temperature. Spread the sauce evenly on top of the cake with a spatula. By Roma Ghosh CHOCOLATE CAKE WITH FRESH CHERRIES INGREDIENTS: 1 kg chocolate or sponge cake 300 gm fresh cherries for decoration For the chocolate sauce: 2 tbsp drinking chocolate 3 tsp sugar METHOD Prepare the chocolate sauce: By heating 1 cup of water. STEWED PEARS IN SWEET MANGO PULP INGREDIENTS: For the mango pulp: 1 kg sweet mangoes 2 tsp sugar – optional 3-4 tbsp thick cream 37 July (Second) 2010 . Just before serving spread out the cherries over the chocolate sauce and serve cutting into slices. Lower the heat and add the lukewarm water to the drinking chocolate powder and stir till the powder is dissolved in the water. Stir on low fire till the sugar melts and the chocolate also mixes well into the sauce. Mix this into the remaining water and also add sugar to the water. lukewarm and served hot when mingled with other ingredients and pamper your taste buds. Every season has its abundance to offer. Keep stirring with a Woman’s Era ● wooden spoon till the sauce begins to thicken. Place the cake on the plate and keep the plate in the fridge at least for 1 hour so that the sauce settles down and thickens.Chocolate cake with fresh cherries Fruits are all time favourites. Enjoy the seasonal fruits in different forms – chilled.
cut into small pieces and run the mango pieces. Lower the heat and mix in the cloves powder. Do not peel the pears. Place on a serving dish and keep in the fridge to chill. Place 2 pieces on each serving plate and top with a portion of the mango pulp and garnish with mint leaves. Cut into eight pieces and remove the seeds. Divide the remaining mint leaves into three portions and place in the soup bowls. sugar and cream in a mixer to obtain a smooth pulp. Put off the heat and remove the pears from the syrup with a slotted spoon. stirring from time to time till the pears begin to change colour – this should take around 3-4 minutes. . Place the cucumber pieces and 3-4 mint leaves and the sugar and blend in a mixer to obtain a pulp. Sprinkle the chilli flakes and stir gently. Place small portions of the apple pieces in the chilled soup and serve at once. Serve chilled. Add the pear pieces and cook on low fire. Cut into small pieces just before you are ready to serve the soup. Heat 200 ml of water and MINT AND CUCUMBER REFRESHER (cold soup) INGREDIENTS: 60 gm mint leaves 3-4 medium-sized cucumber 100 ml thick curd 1/ tsp sugar 2 1 tsp coarsely ground red chilli flakes 1 apple METHOD Peel the cucumber and remove the seeds and cut into small pieces. Stewed pears in sweet mango pulp Mint and cucumber refresher For the stewed pears: 2 pears 3 tbsp sugar 1/ tsp cloves powder 4 For garnishing: mint leaves METHOD Peel the mangoes.add the sugar and stir till the sugar melts. Cut and core the apples but do not peel the apples. Place in three soup bowls and place the bowls in the fridge for the soup to chill.
APPLES IN MUSTARD SAUCE INGREDIENTS: 3-4 apples For the mustard sauce: 3 tsp French mustard paste 1/ tsp sugar 2 METHOD Cut the apples into eight pieces and remove the seeds. Mix the mustard sauce in 3 tbsp of lukewarm water and keep the paste aside. Heat 150 ml of water and add the sugar and the cinnamon powder. Fry all the eggs in this way adding salt and pepper to each egg before you turn these over. Place the fried eggs in an oven-proof dish. Serve the pineapple and cherries with a small portion of the syrup over scoops of well-frozen ice cream. Place the oven dish in an oven and bake for only 3-4 minutes in a . Heat another 100 ml of water in a pan and lower the heat. Stir gently till the sugar melts. Boil the orange juice on low fire for 2-3 minutes and then pour over the poached eggs. In the pan in which you have fried the eggs add the orange juice and bring to boil adding the cinnamon powder. Add the pineapple slices and cook on low fire for 23 minutes. Serve chilled with cold rice noodles or with ice cream for dessert. Apples in mustard sauce Stewed pineapple and cherries with ice cream STEWED PINEAPPLE AND CHERRIES WITH ICE CREAM INGREDIENTS: 6-7 pineapple slices 250 gm fresh cherries 2 tbsp sugar 3/ tsp cinnamon powder 4 For serving: ice cream METHOD Cut the pineapple slices into halves or leave these in circles. Mix in the sugar and the mustard paste and stir gently. Add the cherries and continue to boil for another minute. Turn the egg gently so that the yolk is cooked from the top as well. Put off the heat. POACHED EGGS WITH ORANGE SAUCE INGREDIENTS: 6 eggs 300 ml orange juice salt to taste pepper to taste oil for frying the eggs 1/ tsp cinnamon powder 2 METHOD Heat oil in a non-stick pan and fry the eggs sunny side up. Put the apple pieces in this mustard syrup and cook the apples in the sauce for 3-4 minutes or till the sauce begins to thicken slightly. Do not peel the apples. Putt off the heat and cool to room temperature.
Put off the heat and sprinkle the pepper and chilli powder and oregano. Continue to cook till the chicken is tender. Add the peach halves and cook on low temperature for 4-5 minutes. Heat 250 ml of water and add the sugar and the cinnamon powder. Pour into glasses and chill. STEWED PEACHES WITH MINT INGREDIENTS: 12-14 peaches – good quality sweet peaches – big size 3 tbsp sugar 1/ tsp cinnamon powder 2 For garnishing: mint leaves METHOD Cut the peaches into halves Stewed peaches with mint .CHICKEN SALAD WITH LITCHEES Poached eggs with orange sauce Toss gently and place on a serving dish and serve as a salad at room temperature. Throw in a few mint leaves into each glass and serve as a summer refresher. Serve with noodles or steamed rice. Serve chilled garnished with mint leaves as a dessert. Sprinkle a few drops of water and cover with a lid. INGREDIENTS: 300 gm boneless chicken salt to taste 1 tsp vinegar 3 tbsp olive oil 300 gm peeled litchees 1 cup full watermelon pieces – without the seeds and peels 1 cup watermelon pieces – peeled and seeded and cut into cubes 1 tsp pepper powder 1 tsp coarsely ground chilli powder 1 tsp oregano powder METHOD Sprinkle salt and vinegar on the chicken pieces and set aside for 10 minutes. Heat the olive oil in a non-stick pan and add the chicken and fry on low fire for 2-3 minutes. Place on a serving plate and sprinkle a portion of the syrup over the peach halves and chill in the fridge for one hour. WATERMELON AND CUCUMBER REFRESHER WITH MINT INGREDIENTS: 2 cups watermelon pieces – without the peel and seeds 2 cups cucumber pieces – without the peel and seeds 1/ tsp pepper powder 2 1 tsp chaat masala mint leaves METHOD Run the watermelon and cucu mber pieces and pepper powder and chaat masala in a mixer and blend. and discard the seeds. Put off the heat and peel off the skin gently. If you do not want to use the oven you can heat the eggs slightly before serving in the microwave for 30 seconds. Watermelon and cucumber refresher with mint Chicken salad with litches preheated oven at 180 degree C and serve at once. Stir till the sugar melts. Place the chicken pieces in a mixing bowl and add the fruits.
musk melon and water melon salad RASGOLLAS BAKED WITH MANGO PUREE INGREDIENTS: 6-8 rasgollas 1 kg sweet good quality mangoes 11/2 cup milk 11/2 tbsp brown sugar METHOD Peel the mangoes and cut into small pieces. SPROUTS. Place the pieces in a mixer and grind to a puree. Keep in the fridge till time for use.Sprouts. Serve hot or at room temperature or even chilled. Add the milk and run the mixer once again. Sprinkle the brown sugar and place in a preheated oven at 180 degree C for 10 -12 minutes or until the sugar just about begins to melt. Rasgollas baked with mango puree MUSK MELON WITH PEANUT BUTTER SAUCE INGREDIENTS: 400 gm musk melon 100 gm peanut butter 2 tsp sugar powder METHOD Peel the musk melon and remove the seeds and cut into small pieces. Remove to a butter dish and place in a fridge. Run the musk melon pieces. peeled and seeded and cut into cubes 1 cup cucumber cut into small pieces – with the peel 1 or more green capsicum cut into small pieces 2-3 tomatoes cut into small pieces – optional 2 tsp lemon juice 1 tsp pepper powder 1 tsp coarsely ground chilli powder 1 tsp oregano powder METHOD Mix all the ingredients together and serve in a shell of water melon which has been scooped out. Spread on pieces of bread and enjoy the spread between slices of bread like a sandwich. it tastes better. MUSK MELON AND WATERMELON SALAD INGREDIENTS: 200 gm sprouts 1 cup full watermelon pieces – without the seeds and peels 1 cup watermelon pieces – the peanut butter in a mixer to a fine paste. Place the rasgollas on a baking dish and pour the mango puree over the rasgollas. If the salad is chilled before serving. sugar powder and Musk melon with peanut butter sauce .
Heat 100 ml of water and add the sugar. Cut into small pieces and remove the seeds. Add the peach halves and cook on low fire till all the water is evaporated and the sugar caramelises and sticks to the peach halves. Drain and keep aside. Heat 6-7 tbsp water and then add the sugar and the cloves powder. Serve garnished with almonds as a sweet pulao. Serve with ice cream. You could keep the peaches full instead of cutting into halves if We you so wish. Put off the heat and cool to room temperature. cinnamon and the crushed fruit. Lower the heat and cook on low heat till all the water is evaporated. Cook on low fire for 3-4 minutes and the sauce will begin to thicken.CARAMELISED PEACHES WITH ICE CREAM Burger patties with crushed pineapple and apple sauce INGREDIENTS: 10-12 peaches of good quality and big size 3 tbsp sugar 1/ tsp cloves powder 2 For serving: ice cream METHOD Cut the peaches into halves and remove the seeds. Add this aam pana and water mixture to the rice and stir gently. This is a tasty sauce which can be spread over burger patties or served with pakoras or with vegetable or non-vegetarian patties. Caramelised peaches with ice cream Aam pana sweet rice pieces and the pineapple pieces in a mixer. Heat the ghee and add the whole spices and allow to splutter. INGREDIENTS: For the sauce: 2 apples 6-7 slices pineapples 2 tsp sugar 1 tsp cinnamon powder METHOD You may or may not peel the apples. cook on low fire for 2 minutes stirring all the time. In the meantime add one cup of water to the aam pana concentrate and mix well. Add the soaked rice and fry on medium heat for 2 minutes. Run the apple . Cool at room temperature and serve with patties or burgers. AAM PANA SWEET RICE BURGER PATTIES WITH CRUSHED PINEAPPLE AND APPLE SAUCE INGREDIENTS: 1 cup long-grained rice 2 tsp sugar 2 tbsp ghee 1 inch-piece cinnamon 2 cloves 1 cup thick aam pana concentrate For garnishing: almonds METHOD Soak the rice in water for 20 minutes.
and vegetables like cucumber and gourd (lauki) are extremely good for a balanced diet. By Ameeta Sharma S easonal change brings the necessity of variation in one’s beauty-care regime.SUMMER & MONSOON BEAUTY CARE How to glow in heat and humidity. . Consuming a balanced diet is extremely important during these months which drain your inner reserves of water content. With the sweating. At least twice a week. The present situation is moisture loss of skin. SPF with a minimum strength of 30 is recommended for people who have sensitive skin and need to be in the sun for their daily activities or go on two-wheelers for long distances. These have to be tackled on a regular basis. If you have a problem with Unchanging problem: While season change brings a difference in temperature or humidity what remains unchanged in urban India is the pollution and harmful rays of the sun which create havoc for the skin. the hair too becomes greasy and needs to be washed more frequently. a dull flaky look and extra-oily skin. Combating the sun: Something as simple as using an umbrella while out in the sun is extremely helpful during summer. Gone are the cold days of extra-dry skin in winter where the use of the right cream makes a lot of difference in the way your skin feels to the touch. using lemon juice on your face and neck as also hands and other parts of the body that are exposed to the sun helps with the suntan reduction. So the early addition in the regime for adolescents creates a habit that keeps them aware and active to take charge of their own personal care. Beauty care has to be tweaked to suit the climatic change. or preferably every alternate day. Apply directly with cotton wool and wash off after 15 to 20 minutes. Balanced diet: As the saying goes – you are what you eat. Seasonal fruits like watermelon and melons.
Exfoliators for the body scrub are often harsh as the skin on our arms. Oil can be diluted with adding water and mixing well to spread it evenly. always use an ice pack after steaming your face or removing the blackheads. However. If you have the problem of open pores. Splash on your face and then pat dry. While one feels like washing one’s face with soap more than twice a day. Green leafy vegetable like spinach are also very good for the stomach. dry or a combination with a T zone (this is when the nose and forehead area is oily while the rest of the face skin is dry). a dash of honey and some oatmeal powder for face and neck exfoliation. and consume buttermilk rather than full fat milk. hands and feet is thickest. pollution deposits particles on the surface. legs. Cleansing and toning ritual: Off-the-shelf beauty products promise instant results but it is the regular use that will really give you lasting benefits. the top layer of the skin becomes listless and dull. Adding a few drops of rosewater will have a refreshing effect on the skin. Use a lighter cream or oil for body massage as well. As the skin breathes. movements on the face should be smaller. 45 . You need moisture. the products you use on your face would reflect that inner beauty and the effect will be far better. Facials and massages: Heavy creams or essential oils are best avoided in this season as overloading your skin with pore clogging creams is not going to do it any good. gentler and must never pull the skin down but massaged upwards. Soaked almonds can be blended roughly and mixed with raw milk.diabetes then balancing with sugar has to be done. Avoid extra fat as digestion is sluggish in these months. A home-made product is economical and allows you fresh ingredients. Masur pink daal can be soaked for a few hours and then put through a blender mixed with rough oatmeal for the body. Home remedies include using raw tomato juice for cleansing and toning the facial and neck skin. Right moisture: While the skin might feel oily. not necessarily oil. you could make your own lotion of a water base to which a few drops of lavender oil are added. Also. Heavy creams that are needed for the winter months are best packed away for some time and lighter lotions are the call of the day. the surface does become dry. It might be oily. it is recommended you know your skin type. that practice will not benefit you in the long run as the harsh soap or face wash imbalances the Ph of the skin and makes it dry. when you wash or wipe it. if you use make-up then if the base is clear and well cared for. If you have extra-oily skin. face exfoliation mix needs to be softer and must be used gently Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 not in a harsh rough movement. A toner with alcohol needs to be avoided as it strips the skin of all that you need for a healthy skin. While body exfoliating is best done with vigorous movements to improve the blood circulation. Before you decide on products to use on your skin. Opt for a soap-free face wash and select a good toner for your skin type. Joys of exfoliation: Removal of dead skin is mandatory for healthy skin.
This should prevent bleeding of the lip gloss or feathering outside of your lip line. The right face pack depends on your skin type. Say something about make-up removal and how to keep skin supple in general. film and television including NDTV. raisin or a grey add a touch of grading and will make the black eye-shadow less harsh or severe on the eyes. at the base of the throat. A concealer under the eyes is effective as well as a light foundation in liquid or cream form is good for evening use in this weather. National Geographic and the BBC. For oily skin. a rosebased face pack such as a ripe banana mashed with rose water can be applied on the face and washed off after 15 minutes. Chick pea powder mixed with water is a great homemade pack for combination skin. behind the ears. Black eye shadow and then a touch of colour such as brown. For day-wear. colognes and eau de toilettes are less concentrated and ideal for summer. Any specific tip – even about how and where to apply the perfume during these months as some of the alcohol-based perfumes tend to burn the freshly washed skin? It’s good to apply perfume before wearing any expensive clothing. or Sonu to his friends. lemon or orange peel mixed with curds and applied on the face for 15 minutes is effective in reducing blemishes. magazines. If you leave make-up on your face longer than necessary. Use gentle strokes to remove make-up. This trick works for most Indian skin tones. beige. Drinking enough will help replenish the skin and retain moisture. Above all. There are also some interesting make-up primers in the market which can be applied on a clean and moisturised face. Your opinion on colours of eye make-up that suits everybody – most Indian skin tones that is. is a freelance make-up artist in Delhi who has worked on photography assignments. Avoid toners which are quite astringent to the skin. don’t rub the wrists together as it will break down the scent of the fragrance and smell different. a very dry skin could benefit from a cleansing oil or an oil based cleanser. Light fragrances with lemony and fresh citrus tones. Try to choose a cleanser which is based on your skin type. They may strip the skin of its natural oils.A MAKE-UP ARTIST’S VIEW Ankit Kumar. For example. fashion shoots. Do not use baby wipes. A gentle eye make-up remover is a good purchase and avoid rubbing the areas of your face. then apply a small dab of lip gloss to the centre of the lips. water intake is one of the best beauty products all year round and especially in the summer. He has also worked with celebrities and cine stars such as Irfan Khan and Dino Morea. just a pencil eyeshadow works well. Fill with a nude or neutral shade of matte lip colour similar to the colour of your lips. it may clog up the pores of your skin. the cleavage and the insides of your elbows. This can be dabbed onto the skin gently and sparingly with a slightly damp makeup sponge starting from the middle of your face outwards. It’s a fact that make-up will smudge and streak if it’s applied too heavily. especially in the evenings. bridal makeovers. then use a lip liner close to the tone colour of your lips to outline them. If you apply perfume on your wrists.up industry allows him to see how to make the most of an individual’s face and highlight their best features Your advice to base skin preparation for evening make-up during heat and monsoon when skin sweats and make-up tends to slide. What would you suggest specifically for lips – especially to stop bleeding of lipstick when women want to use gloss over the lips? Dust the lips lightly with a face powder. His experience in the make. . So it’s best to remove traces with a regular makeup remover. Fragrances should be sprayed on one’s pulse points which are the wrists. Press the lips together to evenly distribute the gloss. Then you can apply your make-up which should then stay longer on your face. For dry skin. Suggest any face pack for a quick-fix before going out in the evening for a 'natural glow'.
Always use a moisturiser before going to bed at night to repair the day’s damage to the skin. Add half a tsp of sandalwood powder or cinnamon powder to this to give your skin an ethereal glow. Especially in the monsoon. Some hair rinses work for all hair types – add the juice of one lemon to the last rinse of your hair for a squeaky clean feel of the scalp. what works for your face also works well for the scalp and hair. Use of products appropriate for your hair type is highly recommended. Make-up and cosmetics: Selection of products through the summer and monsoon months is very important. Using very cold or warm water is avoidable in the summer and monsoon period as it damages skin and does not make it feel rejuvenated. If you are using tissue paper. . as a base for a face pack. If you are particularly fond of lip gloss. with sweat. use products that will not weigh it down. If your scalp feels itchy and oily. it is best to use waterproof eye makeup to avoid accidental running of the make-up. Fruit packs made with a mashed ripe banana or overripe papaya are good. After applying the face pack relax for about 20 minutes and then wash off with tepid water. dark browns or reds. Creamier blush-on or a bronzing powder is best for the season. At least once a fortnight. Avoid heavy foundation and face powders as. remember to line your lips with a nude lip pencil to avoid bleeding lipstick. If your hair is fine.Use of yogurt in the face pack would supply the right amount of grease to the skin. If you are using hair dye or henna. oil your hair and give it the hot towel treatment for deeper penetration. Mostly. Eyeliners and mascaras are the worst affected in this weather. they tend to become runny and end up looking patchy. We companies make. use face blotters that some international make-up use frequently-used products for the correct effect. A high ponytail or short haircut works for most face shapes. or multani mitti. Just blot with the tissue and always check that no paper is left behind stuck on your face. Lipsticks need to be moisturising and lighter colours to suit the weather rather than deep. Hair care: A beauty regime is never complete without hair care. nourishing hair treatments are good to stop hair from damage and becoming brittle. Get your hair trimmed for split ends and keep a fuss-free style for summer. To remove excess sweat and oily residue on your nose and forehead. Fresh pineapple juice is also good and may be mixed with a tsp of honey to give it the ability to stick to the skin. Face packs should be done at least once a week for best effect. avoid rubbing it as that will ruin all colour balance of the make-up. and you need to shampoo it more often than others. Face packs: If your skin is very oily. For eye make-up select a pencil eye shadow over powders as they might get cracked during the day. use Fuller’s earth.
bottle on the store shelves has been carefully designed and packaged to . therefore. Hmm. This means the products and their advertise ments sneak into our psyche. a cut above the rest. we let our selves be guided and our thinking be influenced by the very persuasive clan of advertisers working in perfect tandem with product desig ners. as I was saying.DO YOU SHOP TILL YOU DROP? WANNA KNOW WHY? How relentlessly the ads arouse your emotions to buy. economical. really. seems like copy writers and product designers can make the world’s best preachers or spiritual gurus! Anyway. And how have we arrived at these conclusions or picked these reasons for shopping? This is how. Pretty awesome. to be able to creep into the crevices of a nation’s collective unconscious and influence its spending behaviour! Which is why the psychodynamics of ad-making and the psychology of marketing fascinate me – how the hell do these people push the right buttons to get us to loosen our purse-strings? How do they motivate us to buy one brand instead of an other? Which instincts of ours do they appeal to? Which emotional strings do they play on? These and many such questions flew about in my mind like bats in a belfry and I thought. the human mind works in strange ways at times). THE LOOK OF THE PACKAGE ALSO HAS AN ENORMOUS IMPACT ON ITS PERCEIVED QUALITY. I’d say. Consciously or unconsciously.. Look around you – most of the things that you are surrounded by are there as a result of your conscious decision to procure them in preference to other similar articles. box. without thinking. our urge to splurge is quite effectively a product of all the smart whipper snapper lines this combo tribe badgers us with via the print and INTERESTINGLY. give their money’s worth (the common sense – but boring! – reasons).. ● fashionable (must have them ’cos everybody else – or those that matter in our social circuit – has them). By Rumy Agarwal M 48 arketing gurus have never had it so good – the world consumer goods is their oyster and they have the customers just how they want them: putty in their hands! No. tube. we know. ● of the latest technology and are. pouch. I am not being hyperbolical – it is a plain simple fact. why not thrash out the psychology of product marketing? Yeah. ● attractively packaged or endorsed by some celebrity (pretty inane reasons for spending dough but. mould our thinking. AN EYE-CATCHING PACKAGE ALMOST SUMMARILY TRANSLATES INTO SUPERIORITY OF THE PRODUCT OR VERACITY OF ITS CLAIMS! Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 electronic media. why not? And guess what I discovered! Each damn jar. Which means that we buy the things we do because they are: ● good. and guide our actions.
you are led to believe you are exchanging it for more than a product. Somehow. you’d be using XYZ product. spend quality time with his family and even his dogs without a wrinkle on his forehead or even his immaculately pressed suit. or (d) the handsome dude or the glamorous chick who leaves a trail of drool in his or her wake. Interesting.” implying that if you are not. almost challenge you to prove that you are (a) either a good parent who values his/her child’s well-being above all else. remember that you have been lured to it – and admit it. next time you reach for a product. An eye-catching package almost summarily translates into superiority of the product or veracity of its claims! Check out the yummy-looking Domino’s pizzas or McDonald’s burgers – don’t they make your mouth water? Of course. the look of the package also has an enormous impact on its perceived quality. (c) the complete man who can. extensively used as the underlying theme for many packages. so to speak. receptiveness and enclosure have the most positive connotations and are. red or luminous green aggressively grab your attention but do not necessarily guarantee purchase of such vividly chromatic goods. So they deserve to reap the profits. you are a scumbag! Holy cow! Products are designed with such meticulous attention to the minutest detail simply to ensure that buyers are tempted to see beyond the label and the packaging and grasp the inherent message which has been targeted either at some particular aspect of their personality. (b) a doting wife who settles for nothing but the best for her husband. or their unacknowledged aspirations. especially. We somehow believe that these big daddies won’t sell us inferior quality products. or even their secret dreams. Bright colours such as yellow. “Hey. all this “activity” goes on at a subconscious level but is very powerful in achieving the desired result. as if to reinforce his love for Sachin or Sehwag or whoever to endorse his inner desire to be like them. And it is understandable that a person wants the entire ambience of his home to have healing properties to help the person unwind after a long day. marketing psychologists have a wide gamut of human emotions to choose from. maybe because they are more soothing to the eye and hence more relaxing for the nerves. in spite of a tight schedule. So. So much so that when you pay cash over the counter. feminine forms such as circles and ovals which suggest completeness. if you care about this. they prefer some subdued or mellowed colours on the packages which are brought home. even though buyers are attracted by brightly-coloured articles. of the shopper’s being – in the buyer’s inner self. a cricket enthusiast almost involuntarily reaches for a jar of Boost when buying drinking chocolate. you are actually buying an attitude or even a set of beliefs! For instance. Colour schemes are important in product packaging. eh ? Equally illuminating is the fact that buying is actually a coping mechanism that humans resort to in order to deal with fears and desires that are difficult to acknowledge and deal with. Ads. It is like. therefore. Interestingly. a specific instinct in the core. Big names which have built up a reputation on a tradition of trust undoubtedly have the cutting edge in consumer preference. In fact. brand names also have a lot to do with the consumer accepting a product. See. Of course.appeal to a particular emotion. for that matter. you are We loving it! 49 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . that or the other. and so on. It is a belief which the manufacturers have worked hard to instil and even harder to live up to.
so you look scintillating and sexy. Stylishly long . Style dominates the scene.Different Cuts Whether it is long or short. its charm is the thing that matters.
described a beauteou .Longish and longer A parting that falls over An attractive bun Urban-Afro style Styled for the times The curl that sucks in Do gentlemen really prefer the blonde? atement is not Making hairstyle st gined. A lot as easy as it is ima king and of imaginative thin at can be wh planning goes into s hairdo.
The he river was already crowded when Hema squirrels got alert and paused to look at the cows reached there. They blushed as silent. The sun was gather the clothes to be washed. She hung the clothes on the string in the began to sweep the floor hurriedly. air. beside her and walked towards her home with water The rooster crowed. standing on one leg over a dripping from her dress. pausing and playing with dew till other’s hands so that the slipping sands her friends caught up with her. the river fell shook their heads gently. clothes sitting on stones and sands. The cows mooed in the shed and beat the T 52 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . when Hema Holding a pot at her waist. sitting on the verandah. The toothless old about to appear as the strand of light woman sitting on the verandah smiled at her as she lowered and kissed the vast stretch of undulating closed the doors behind her. which stood like a wall across the me up.. teased her by blinking its eyes before getting lost As they grazed. The river. to the empty shed and collected extended from the top of the hill to the middle cowdung. Sometimes. The women let loose the knots of hairs and from the tip of the bent grass. grazing at a distance looked like dots on a canvass. It stopped in the middle of its trunk. The of diamonds. she inhaled the morning chewing the cud leisurely. The glow backyard. talking The river they would perch on the heads of the cows and laughing. She ran to the eastern periphery of the village. collecting cows held their heads up and let the girls their clothes theAs the sun began to turn white behind caress their necks and kiss their foreheads. The banks of the river would have been As she rushed to the courtyard the cows followed crowded. creating rainbows. spread dry straw of the sky. They held each there. tweaked the cheeks of the girl bathing and got strewn in the sands. She cleaned the ropes. the wife of Squeezing petticoats between their legs. The cattle banyan tree. she thought. gathered the crumpled petals of henna rolled over their bodies clothes. the dew-washed thin blades of amidst thick leaves. cows had already returned from the field and were Standing at the windows.’ she muttered to herself. Somewhere. The up from the bed. stairs. She cursed herself for sleeping late. the reached the farmer walked indolently towards the girls entered the water. The birds baths and were collecting their clothes to emerged from their nests in droves and return. Hema got verandah and opened the doors of her house. The women had taken their with their tails swinging in the air. a farmer of water hung onto their tresses like nuggets were played his flute sitting under a tree. piercing through a large chunk of on the floor for the cows to sleep on and began to cloud having frayed edges. They held water women had gathered at the river and bowed their in the cups of their palms and threw it over taken their heads towards the flame of orange that their heads. ‘He should at least wake hill. Girls of her age were washing made somersaults in the air. a squirrel ran past her towards the old walking leisurely behind the demure oxen.STORY SHORT Hema’s Choice By Anil Kumar Panda When a village girl has to choose between two conflicting proposals. On the other side of the river was already and pry for the twisting worms in the men and children plunged into the water crowded grasses. Hema took her bath. As she alighted the fields — the sweating farmers were already tilling.. A n arrow of light emerged from behind the already gone to the field. The drops baths and filled the horizon. from a high rock sending out waves. They would not pull them down. She took the broom and her. Her father had courtyard. mango trees and the dew disappeared to return. She walked up to the dunghill below the half-opened windows. grasses stung their nostrils which they cleared with their hooves or by shaking their heads violently.
’ she thought. Two strands. She heard someone calling her father’s name outside. She tethered them to the poles. His eyes stayed fixed on Hema’s face for a while. She opened the doors and alighting the stairs. ‘If those eyes were alive. The sun had reached the middle of the sky. Hema would look at her father as he dipped his calloused palm into the bowl. The lips were as thin as petals and quivered to open up. She entered the kitchen and brought the pot of rice water. she looked towards the field. Tears gathered at the corners of his eyes as the face of his wife appeared from nowhere and he felt the walls of the house shaking with their laughter. S S ometimes the rice water would get spilled out of the bowl as his thoughts flew into the future — when Hema would be wed and he would have little grandchildren. He looked so innocent. Hema caressed their necks. The field seemed empty except for one or two cows grazing under the trees.’ she thought. Clouds of dark tresses ran down to her waist. Her mother’s eyes looked like two butterflies. rolled the handful of rice into a ball and put it into his mouth. about 60 years. just like that of a pigeon. he closed the doors. She had kept watered rice cooked the previous night. She pushed them back and pinned them over her head. As the cows dipped their tongues into the pot. Someone might have brought some news from her father? She opened the doors and found Sadhu. the peon of the village school. “Where is Madhab?” he asked. placed it in the sun to dry and. sitting in front of the mirror. Tiny drops of perspiration stuck to the eyelashes and shone like diamonds. hold back the tears and begin to eat like a child. He would straighten himself. began to comb her hair. Hema would look at his stony and shining face as if that had been cut and polished with utmost care. “Not yet returned from the field I think?” His senile frame seemed to fall . Her father should have arrived by now.” she had heard her mother saying about her to him while plaiting her hair. Wisps of thin white hairs hung loose at the periphery of the cap and his eyes were covered with thick glasses. ‘He must have gone to the river to take a bath. ‘she would like to hold them in her palms for ever. she could hear the shouts of the children coming back from school. He was thin. standing in front of her. Her father must be coming behind them. That stare of Hema’s reminded him of her mother. making half moons by the sides of her eyes. As his thoughts evaporated. “She has your eyes and nose and chin. She decided to take a walk towards the river — to see if her father was really there. cleaned the pot with ash. bending his head to one side. Her eyes fell on the photograph of her mother — smiling at her from inside the wooden frame. Her father must be coming now.’ The villagers often said that Hema’s eyes had the same mysteriousness and depth of her mother’s. The village dogs looked at her expectantly with their tongues dangling and breathing heavily. stood in front of the mirror and looked at herself. dark and wore a cap that looked as old as him. hung on either sides of her forehead. Keeping her hand over her eyes to ward off the sun. Outside. She was already 17 and looked like the most beautiful girl in the village. She got suspicious. Her father would love to have it with chilli and onion. walked a short distance from where the field was visible.earth with their hooves. like two tender creepers. The street looked deserted as the village folks had finished their meals and retired to their mud houses. his eyes would fall on Hema who was staring at him for spoiling his dress with rice water.
Throwing the the utensils in front of her face so that her eyes could sticky ball into a pot she rushed to the door. He came down from the with a pile put one morsel after another into his mouth verandah and stood in the middle of the of clothes to as if he had been hungry for days.“Have you given rice “No.” the master’s house. She “It is up to you.” said Madhab. shed for fodder. “They say he shook their bodies. “I forgot to tell you that I might be towards his forehead. I also washed the shed with hands of my daughter. A drop of perspiration was often. Hema put the government’s various schemes in the village. half eaten. learning and would return to the village after having Hema picked up a broom and started to gather finished some medical course at the college. She finished her rice and a knot and was about to go to the backyard when began to collect the utensils.” again looking at his face.” for rice. He bent forward a little and began to and expected news of her father from Sadhu. He should come to from the his eyes got wider.” he began to say with “He did not tell me anything when he and on. lifted the bowl to his mouth and drank the rice water.” he put village.” near the cot putting the bowls of rice between them. The day was getting hotter. It ema wanted Sadhu to stay till her father formed a ring around his lips. How could I know?” mooing of visited us last week. Hema sat He dusted the place on the floor and “The rain is about to come in a few squatted down. She gathered the webs into would earn in thousands after that. forget to tell him. darn. He nodded. late as I had to go to the other side of the river — to “But you can sit till he returns. no. He handed over the verandah.” her tone seemed a little rude. Her eyebrows danced like looking into his eyes. I have nothing to say. “Where have you been?” she asked handing “Not yet. school during the recess hour today. daughter. “Where have you been?” she said “Come inside. cows could man and had been to great places to learn “Tell Madhab that our headmaster be heard Sanskrit in his youth. looked at Hema with dreamy eyes and fell into a daze. “He is a very learned leaves in the wind. wash his face. She She closed the doors and sat on the cot waiting said nothing and went on eating quietly. Inside the holes in the walls.” river.” said Hema looking towards the and give me something to eat. for her father. maybe this month. about hoe and the basket in a corner and asked her father each other’s family — till Hema’s mother would if he wanted some water. They would talk for hours on various the hoe and basket to Hema and sitting on the floor things — about rain. held she heard the knocks on the door. “It is road. the slow progress of began to wipe his body with his cloth. I will make you some tea. 54 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . and lamps were to be lit. “Don’t innocence in her eyes.” said Hema. “His son will be coming from the town and dusty path in hurried paces till he vanished behind the cluster of huts at the edge of the this month.H She opened it and saw her father standing in on Hema.” Sadhu adjusted his cap by pulling it a little answering her. Then she got up. You the cobwebs that had accumulated at the corners of know we don’t have such a college in our village. the pigeons Madhab stopped to take a breath. Off due to that old man. the bowl in front of him and looked at Hema. He said Sadhu.” the roof. She looked anxious over the bowl. Sadhu used to come to her house quite glistening with sweat. to come soon and the headmaster will throw me out “Don’t bother about the cows.” He waited for Hema to say something. He must be feeling tired in “Don’t get angry. She saw him walking down the hot his thumb. I don’t expect him back to Hema and wiping his face. the a morsel in his mouth. this heat. felt sure that no grain was left. my darling daughter. It is urgent and that’s why Madhab ran his hand inside the bowl I myself have come to give this message.” As Madhab talked wants to talk to him. I have given them of the school gate if I sit here and drink tea from the rice water and fodder. “He must be coming. cowdung. I have so much work in the water to the cows?” Madhab asked without school. He would drink tea with her father sitting on hanging from the tip of his nose. He might have gone to buy seeds.” Hema nodded Hema said. uncle. She sat in front of him days. The old man along with his wife and son would come to see you. Her father and Sadhu had been friends front of her. The could hear the desperate cry of a hungry dog in the villagers say that the boy has a great appetite for backyard. His body had turned black and was for long.” said Sadhu. Tears welled up in her eyes. which he wiped with returned.” said shed. “So?” Hema asked with a look of Sadhu turning towards Hema. She went into shout at them as the cows seemed restless in the kitchen and came with a bowl of water. “who had went out of the house. standing with his “My goodness! Don’t say that.
His eyes were fixed on the deep furrows that formed on the forehead of the headmaster when he spoke. Off and on. “Yes. one after another. The farmers were getting ready to go to the barns to thresh paddy. “You should see him at the school during the recess hour.” she said. She woke him up so that he could reach the school before it closed. the sweat gathered on her eyelashes and blurred her vision.” Madhab said nothing. she wondered. upon a stone. “What more did he say?” “Nothing more. They went to him to seek advice if they were in trouble. He gestured to Madhab to sit on a stool in front of him. “Madhab. wipe the eye with the edge of her frock. she sat down and began to rub ash on the bowls. combed his hair and went to the school closing the doors behind him. He was about to say something when the headmaster said. He looked so simple and innocent and his forehead was smeared with thick sandalwood paste. come. placing his hands under his head. Most of the time she remains busy in household jobs. the mooing of cows could be heard from the shed. The villagers treated him with great respect. He .” The headmaster shook his head up and down. told Hema not to forget to give fodder and water to the cows. he closed the pen and put away the paper he was writing on. and smiled. Sometimes. How would the life on the other side of the river be. ‘How would life in the town be? How could I face the girls in the river when the news spread in the village?” She blushed. I want to talk to you about Hema. A ceiling fan with twisted blades was whirring labouriously from the ceiling. I had sent Sadhu to you. She looked at her father who was sleeping peacefully. Beads of perspiration ran down the temple of Hema. “Let me take a nap first. said the headmaster when he saw Madhab standing in front of his office. There is so much work to do. Madhab washed his face.” said the headmaster taking off his glasses and cleaning his eyes with his middle finger and thumb. of course.” whispered Madhab. whiffs of winds entered the room through the windows and lifted the pages of the calendar on the wall. The headmaster wore a pair of thick glasses having a dark frame. cursing herself for forgetting to give the news. take a deep breath and resume her work.not meet her father’s and. strutted away to the backyard where. I know. “Yes. She remembered the old man whom she had seen in the village market walking with an umbrella in one hand and a bag in the other. “What is she doing in the house?” the headmaster went on. yes. It must be very difficult for her to leave the house. A few books and notebooks lay scattered on the table and a pen was lying open on a sheet of half-written paper. and fell on the cloth she was sewing. it was still hot inside the room. The thought of getting married and leaving the house and her father worried her. The pigeons ruffled their wings as gusts of hot wind set their bodies on fire. he began to snore. “I was waiting for you. dusting his shirt with his fingers. Sometimes. “It has really been difficult for you after her mother died?” the headmaster asked. Madhab shifted on the stool and nodded his head. Hema sat near the cot with a pile of clothes to darn. she remembered Sadhu’s visit.” Hema said.” He was sitting on a wooden chair behind a table which looked quite old and was covered with a plastic sheet. Though the sun was about to touch the horizon in the western sky.” “When had he come?” he asked. He was in a hurry and did not sit even for tea. ‘Did his son look like him?’ she wondered. How would his life be without her? Who would sweep the floor and wash the utensils? Her thoughts got interrupted as the cot creaked when Madhab turned over. S he found her father seated on the cot made of wood and coconut rope. Suddenly. “Sadhu had come to tell that you must see the headmaster. The colour of the sun was beginning to turn red at its fringe as it hung between the treetops and the horizon.” said Madhab and.” “I know. “She assists me in taking care of the cows and the house. Madhab. smiling to herself. C ome. She would place the cloth on the floor. How is Hema? I have not seen her since she left the school.
nothing else. A hen surrounded by her chicks scoured the dust near Hema’s feet. or let me say the purpose of calling you here is. As Hema has completed her primary education. understand a riddle. The chicks ran about and gathered behind her whenever a dog or a cat passed by.” He began to Madhab got up from the stool and stood before gather the broom. sir.” said the headmaster releasing his hands from under his armpits and shaking Madhab’s shoulder. She would finish all her work in the Madhab adjusted the pail between his legs house and come to school. “The headmaster told me to take you to go. she stood near feel hurt. about his headmaster wanted to meet you urgently?” “I am telling you for her benefit. who armpits. otherwise it would be difficult to plant the seeds.” M 56 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 .M She has been a good student of our school. She health and Hema pressed on holding the calf around would not feel lonely here and can future plans its neck so that its head touched her cheek continue her study if she likes.” said Madhab to the women. adhab looked at the face of the headmaster As he reached home. headmaster said as if to make a child for Hema. experience in teaching. The father and daughter came out of the headmaster asked Madhab about his health and house and the neighbours sitting on the steps looked future plans for Hema. we “And how will the crop be this year?” the have to go to school. all right. “Be ready tomorrow.” headmaster as it got full and heavy. Hema followed her father.” He leaned forward as much as possible towards Madhab and acted as if he had confided a great secret in him. I have to ask her. picking up a pail.” the cows have to be taken care of. said.” the school tomorrow. began to put the glasses on and placed them at the edge of his nose. Women seated in front of their houses covered their heads as their in-laws returned from the fields and river. “The matter is. and cats from entering at night. “I will see. As voice so that the headmaster should not stood facing Madhab milked the cows.” adhab returned from the field and told Hema said Madhab without turning to look at the to put on a clean frock and get ready. the pans and the straw into a the headmaster with folded hands.” “When are they coming to see Hema?” said the “All right. “What did “That will be taken care of. the a calf on its forehead as it licked her hand. Madhab asked Hema if the who was smiling at him with his upper lip cows had been given rice water and fodder and.” the and she felt the warmth of the soft skin. “We are expecting the monsoon to come soon. She will near the the headmaster say?” she asked and kissed remain in the school for three to four hours gate. His hands were crossed over curiously at them. Day by day it is becoming interested in taking her to school. Hema was sitting outside on the steps of the verandah when Madhab reached home.” said asked caressing the udder. corner of the cowshed. we need a teacher for the kids below five years in our school. only. I want Hema to work in our school. “The land has already been tilled in the wanted to know why his father was so pre-monsoon rain. looked at them questioningly. But you must consider what I old woman whose voice seemed trembling with age. “The headmaster “Let me go. “Why did you rain and non-availability of seeds of good quality. The air was filled with the sounds of bells and shouts of children playing in the street. “Nothing.” As they stood facing each other near the gate. “What?” “Yes. went to the shed to milk “But she is only 17 and has no the cows. I think she can do it. said. And who will look curious to know what had transpired after my house?” Madhab asked in a low As they between him and the headmaster. Give me permission to backs. Don’t let Hema sit in the house and kill time. He told her that difficult to depend on agriculture due to insufficient the headmaster wanted to talk to her.” he said. following the cows and bulls. his chest and the palms were hidden under the “To the school. Madhab pulled his head back and sat straight. Hema headmaster. sir. each other him and caressed their necks. patted the cows and picking lice off their “All right. Madhab handed over the pail to Hema. He pulled the chair closer to the table and said. Madhab and hung his face down looking Madhab “Then how did Sadhu say that the worried. drawn into his mouth. The crimson rays of the sun splashed on the verandah of the house. the not tell me yesterday?” she pleaded looking perplexed. The girl is alone in the house and wanted to see her.” They came out of the shed headmaster asked as he got up from the chair and and closed the gate made of wattle to keep dogs followed Madhab to the gate.
sir. Hema! Come. straightening himself in the chair.” “Marriage can wait.” the headmaster went on. There was an unusual gravity and maturity in her voice that Madhab was astonished to notice.” “It is up to you. I see! Have you asked Hema about her wish?” said the headmaster. “All you have to do is to take care of the little children of nursery classes. He could not dare to look into her eyes and turned his face towards the headmaster.” said Madhab. Hema. He sat in his chair and offered Madhab a chair to sit on. “But let me tell you. looking at the women who nodded their heads and their glances flitted between Hema and Madhab. he heard the headmaster humming a song with his gaze fixed on the yellowish blades of the fan rotating demurely overhead. The father of the boy himself had come with the proposal. crumpling her father’s shirt in her hands. wondering at the beauty of Hema. looking at Hema and Madhab alternately.” said the old woman.” Madhab said. “Not yet.” Oh. come to the school from tomorrow.” he said and began to gather the papers spread on the table into a bundle. I am just giving you a proposal.” Madhab was saying. Hema remained standing at the side of her father. sir.” The air of authority in her face startled Madhab. before the old woman as she went on asking one question after another about Hema’s marriage. and the time she had spent during her schooldays. he headmaster waited for any reaction from Hema.” said Hema.” the headmaster said leaning back in his chair and looking at the ceiling. “We are looking for a girl for this post and we thought Hema was alone in the house after her mother’s death so she could pass her time here.” Hema’s hold tightened on the shoulder of her father. “Any day in this month. you can pursue your studies. I want you to join our school. “it would be very difficult to get such a boy. “A proposal for her marriage has come. come. Let me. If you would be interested. “Arre. Madhab realised that the case was no more in his hands. She remembered her friends. “At the same time.” said the headmaster and led them to his office. what will they think if they see her loitering in the village?” the old woman said as Madhab and Hema turned to go.” Madhab stood there. She went to the headmaster and touched his feet. She had turned into a statue listening to the headmaster. Hema looked at the old structure of the school that she had left a few years ago. Hema. A group of children followed them to a distance. Hema’s face turned crimson as the women teased her. “Anything can wait. “Have you talked to Hema?” said the headmaster. “Come from tomorrow. As Madhab got up from the chair to go. “Don’t let her move in the street like this. She stood behind her father in an effort to conceal her face. Silence prevailed for some time. She had lost the power of speech.” “Her marriage would give you a great relief.” the headmaster said.” T T hey stood in front at the gate of the school and saw the headmaster and Sadhu working in the garden. dispersed into groups and began to play. He looked at Hema intently over his glasses. We . She will look so beautiful in her bridal dress. They are coming at the end of this month to see her. But I have told them to inform me a day or two before.“What a beautiful face she has. “Then let me ask her. “I have a plan for you. “Let us know their opinion.
I should describe what a typical biodata for a marriage alliance looks like. All professions. The broker lands up in her house. with a fond uncle or an over friendly aunt playing the matchmaker. engineers. usually the mother. The minute the phone call is made. After all. Having many cousins with children of marriageable ages. It is every parent’s fond desire to see his child settled in life with a partner worthy of – or the parents step into a matrimonial agency. I have been privy to their tensions and hassles.” The unsuspecting parents. Now. the fond parents mention the colour of his complexion. An advertisement might run something like this “All religions. whether very fair/fair/wheatish. she is prey to the broker’s demands. By Gulsum Basheer hat parents do behind their children’s backs. So in steps the marriage broker . Until a few years ago. None of the boy’s or girl’s achievements in his professional field is highlighted in this. The brokers advertise themselves in the local newspapers. on Sunday mor nings goes an advertisement for the weekly matrimonial classi fieds in a leading newspaper. with photographs and biodata of prospective brides or grooms as the case maybe. contacts the broker. most parents chose their child’s better-half from among their relatives and acquaintances. The broker knows this and how to sweet-talk the parents into becoming putty in his trained hands. as the father is busy (may be) earning to pay for the Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 ensuing wedding. Most importantly I have watched with alarm how gullible they become when they are dealing with marriage brokers. with joint families breaking up into nuclear units and people settling far away from the places of their ancestral origin. Marriages fixed. right after mentioning the applicant’s name and date of birth. while the heavier ones are passed off as athletic. Instead. Before I say more about the blundering brokers. My cousin contacted a broker to find a bride for her highly qualified him or her.PARTNER SEARCH W 58 Beware of wedding brokers while trying to find a match for your son or daughter. finding a bride or groom has become a Herculean task. doctors. Exclu sive and Bonafide. they want the best for their child. Then the child’s build which is always slim. VIP marriages.
In the broker’s view my cousin was too demanding and not willing to make compromises. where according to them their services are much sought after. But she was still not satisfied and said so to the man. but these are finalised on earth. two of whom he had lured from the matrimonial sites.and handsome son. The broker arrived at her house in a car. cultured family. even his salary amount. To give the devil its due. If only he had put his brains to better use! So. she saw the portfolios of many girls. Marriages are made in heaven. One of the girls he had met on the matrimonial site was an army major’s daughter with a wellpaying job. He had pretended to her to be from the IAS cadre. one should tread warily. place of residence and her qualifications. They never came to an understanding. each prettier than the other and an accompanying tableau with their qualifications that perfectly matched my cousin’s expectations and living right there in her city too. he took her son’s photo and biodata. “We are saving you a whole lot of trouble. jeevansaathi. Then my cousin contacted a famous marriage bureau often advertised in the papers. According to my cousin. she came to understand that this man was a marriage broker collecting information about prospective grooms in their city and later passing on this information to other families with girls for a fee. He took down her e-mail ID and told her that he would mail her a few girls’ details which might suit her son. After some time the broker stopped sending her any girl’s details. there is a not so genuine one waiting to hook an unsuspecting person. On the day of the wedding she had to pay the broker his commission of a whooping fifty thousand rupees. It was then that she realised that those five girls. professional models. But parents should use their discrimination when using their services. but it has many branches in different states and even in Gulf countries. his physical attributes.2000 as registration fees. Not all marriage bureaus are frauds. armed with a laptop. My unsuspecting cousin poured out her son’s details. THE MARRIAGE BROKERS Some marriage brokers place advertisements in matrimonial classifieds in newspapers for a fictitious person. when she logged into their website. his place of work. Then he politely asked her for Rs. her son was too good for the girls the broker pointed out. whose pictures accompanied by cooked up qualifications according a person’s demands. But these did not match up to my cousin’s expectations. a decent sounding man attended her call and answered her queries.com. When my cousin rang up the agency’s branch in her city. My cousin was lured by an advertisement that said. A few years ago in Chennai. But for every hundred true profile on the net. a few girls’ details and photos. whose photos she had received earlier by e-mail on the list. Taken in by the whole packaging. But none were of the five beautiful and highly NOT ALL MARRIAGE BUREAUS ARE FRAUDS. I am not mentioning the name of the agency. the broker and she would call each other up and wage a battle of words. his qualifications. take everything you hear with a huge dose of salt. So that was a good two thousand rupees down the drain. “Very fair engineering graduate bride. qualified girls.com and nikah.” They just might have a point there. Then she was given a registration number. She received by mail pictures of five girls. Later at home. like the bride’s height. he did forward to her e-mail ID.” When she called the number given in the ad. Many online marriage portals like Bharat Matrimony. my cousin hurried to their office and paid the initial amount of one thousand rupees as registration fee. using which she could log into the agency’s website and get the contact details of any girl they liked. check and recheck every single detail you hear. Every few days. to part with a thousand rupees.com have been doing a wonderful job in connecting people wishing to get married. the man who answered her call said that he was the bride’s uncle.We 59 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . many times over and never take anything at face value. police arrested a man who had married four different girls. while he was just a school dropout.com. from which he showed her many girls’ photos and their biodata. There are thousands of genuine real-life stories of couples who met through these marriage sites. It was only later. were used to bait customers to their agency. with the help of a broker only. My cousin finally found a bride for her son. He cut off all ties with her and also refused to answer her calls. Educated. BUT PARENTS SHOULD USE THEIR DISCRIMINATION WHEN USING THEIR SERVICES. Who said weddings were cheap? I can hear the youth of today advocating love marriages as against arranged marriages and telling their parents. when enlisting the help of marriage brokers or bureaus or meeting a person registered in the matrimonial sites. shaadi. After my cousin had coughed up the amount. He asked for her preference in brides. Their names. Then he asked for her son’s height. date of birth and his qualifications. addresses and telephone numbers were hidden of course.
Desai tyle and fashion aficionados never had it so good. 1 . With the alarm bells of recession ringing. rather than follow fashion blindly. sales and discounts are the order of the day. ● Roman sandals with sexy straps and tie-ups are definitely something that you would like to add to your footwear collection. And while it is difficult to resist splurging on all the must have’s that had previously been out of your reach. What’s fashion and style for one can very easily spell disaster for another.TEN FASHION NO-NO’S S Looks great? But on you? By Minakshi. So. However. here’s a good time to dwell on some bitter truths. S. it makes more sense to make your own style statements. the prices hitting rock bottom faster than the sensex on a bad bull day.
you end up with more work than you or your saris are capable of taking. ● Saris embellished with sequins. While it is nice to be adventurous and add that extra zing to your personality with a tint or a few tastefully applied highlights. walk or talk has everything to do with how successful you will be in what you have on. ● There is nothing more depressing looking than love handles pouring out of low-waist jeans. Which brings us to the tenth fashion faux pas: squeezing 6 7 8 9 yourself into an outfit which has magically shrunk while hanging in your wardrobe. And while you are at it. Gwalior. unless you think you can pull it off. So it’s best not to drag your feet or scrape the heels on sharp stones. polish if required. Brassieres that have lost their elasticity give your figure a decided sag that is undesirable.” said the famous novelist Mark Twain. Whether they are here to stay is the big question. So go out there and make an We impression! Winners of Eurofab Quiz Contest . Make sure to replenish your lingerie wardrobe regularly. While clothes that are the height of fashion look 2 3 4 5 cool and fashionable on the teeny boppers. keeping your nails neatly clipped is a better bet. as are the Anarkali’s frock tops and leggings. Undeniably. as with everything else. If you cannot control your weight. as it often happens. garbage and rubble strewn all over the place. nail polish that is chipped or nails that are bitten to the bone look abominable. make sure to wipe the footwear clean. well-worn petticoat ruffles or edges peeping out from under a sari you paid an arm and a leg for do tend to bring down the tone of your attire. There is nothing more unsightly than an item of clothing trying its best to hold in the rolls of your extra fat. Invest in satin or cotton petticoats that complement the sari rather than make do with something that doesn’t quite match. stones and embroidery have been doing the rounds for quite a while now. use hand cream regularly. ● Frayed. ● The fact that it’s called inner wear should tell you something. so if pressed for time.P. the obliging tailor conveniently leaves enough margin for just such an eventuality. As have designer blouses with more colours and designs than the colours of the rainbow. How you dress. and put them back in the cloth bags supplied by the shoe store or in a shoe box. There are umpteen fashion choices for the older generation whereby you cannot only look chic but make a fashion statement too. And this is not taking into account the variety of laces and borders that trim the edges of your abstract masterpiece. take up jogging. out landish colours and tints can be very tricky. While the question of going around in your birthday suit doesn’t arise. That way the zipper won’t give you a problem and you will be able to spend on a few knick-knacks too! “Clothes make the man.these are a strict no-no if you happen to have ankles that are not as delicately turned as you would wish as the extra straps only succeed in drawing attention to the part of your body that you are not too proud of. it’s advisable to resist the temptation. And if. you will realise that the reason it looks so good on the mannequin in the store window is that her dimensions border on the anorexic. or go for long walks. Something that should remain in – hidden from view. Pin: 474001 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 61 . Naked people have little or no influence on society. short flared kameez with churidars are the latest in fashion. Bra straps or buckles coming out for a breath of fresh air from under the sari blouse are an absolute no-no. Be that as it may. ● Hair colour can often go horribly wrong. in an effort to outdo the competition. ● Long nails that aren’t manicured properly. Subtle understated elegance is better than over the top glitter. moderation is the key. ready to stack in your shoe rack or cupboard. It is an easy matter where sari blouses are concerned. BADA.8 10 Amit Pateria Near Shree Ram Place. taking care of your nails is time-consuming. After each wear. Remember. But if you take a moment to think before enthusiastically slipping into one of these. Lashker. Our roads are more often than not dirty with grit. fat ankles. ● The most elegant of outfit loses its charm when accompanied by sandals that have scuffed heels and a battered look. Darjee OLI. it’s a good idea to invest in a new wardrobe. And yes. Global shades of rust or blonde on a dark complexion can wreak havoc on your appearance. Your stylist will be the right person to advise you on the shade most suitable for your complexion. the same sadly is not applicable to women past their prime. M. zipping them up is a pipe dream. ● Calories have a tendency to pile up where we least suspect it. And try not to let it show! ● Dress you age. it is a fact that appearances matter. But it’s another matter when it comes to jeans – while squeezing yourself into a pair becomes a gargantuan task. So. the budget strings are feeling the pinch.
This is an effort of Maneka Gandhi. Manu Parekh. Each time it promotes a novel. By Suman Bajpai T hirty artists and designers. It’s a great opportunity for connoisseurs to own a limited edition (They are in 10s and twenties only). Sabyasachi Mukherjee. This year’s show has her aligning with Sunil Sethi Design Alliance to create carpets out of master art. etc. chairperson of People for Animals. Raza. exciting art form and has become a trendsetter in the art world.ART ON CARPETS Weaved for a cause. extraordinary designs and low prices… Sounds quite alluring? Every year People for Animals (PFA) holds a unique fundraiser exhibition with a novelty. Manjit Bawa. are . Ritu Kumar. Sabavala. M F Hussein. who organises every year an event to raise funds and awareness for animal welfare. Each PFA fundraiser is designed as a unique and spectacular event. JJ Valaya.
reinforces her commitment to her cause – People for Animals – and throws light on her personal take on carpet as art. a collection of designer T-shirts by all of India’s top designers and the Affordable Art Show with over 1000 works by the country’s top 15 artists each priced at an unbelievable standard price of Rs 40. We had an exhibition of 10. But we do it in a different way – we don’t do paintings.000! We marked India’s 60th year of Independence with a spectacular exhibition of 6000 British-India lithographs dating back to the 1700s. So it is natural for me to combine the two. oleographs. The buyer is happy as it turns out to be a bargain. Artists are wonderfully generous people and it is a joy to work with them.the participant artists. People for Animals did the first big art exhibition/sale in India – which is now so common that every day there are 50 exhibitions. pottery. Excerpts: Why have you chosen the arts to help your crusade for animals? Art and all the forms of art have always interested me. The name of the exhibition is Fly your own carpet to your walls and we intend to turn carpets into the ultimate modern art form. people like buying them. exciting art form and has become a trendsetter in the art world. How did you come up with this idea of art on carpets? Every year we take art and do something new. We have already started selling carpets.. We do lithographs. We’re good at selling them and try to keep them at a level where everybody’s happy. creating a whole new segment in India’s growing art market.. it will make people realise how talented our weavers are. using the very best materials. prices will be kept reasonable and attractive which Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 63 . Moreover. while we are happy because we get enough money for our hospitals. Each time it promotes a novel. So I could combine the two. photography. Past PFA fundraisers include a centenary exhibition of Raja Ravi Verma oleographs. As always. the exhibition will be held on 27-29 August 2010 at The Lalit in New Delhi. I am the chairperson of Rugmark. the NGO involved in the carpet industry which looks after weavers’ children for many years. How much of an impact do you think this exhibition will have? Hopefully. Planned as a three-day event. We have woven paintings of legendary artists into a limited edition of carpets. Also I hope it will sell a lot and help me build more hospitals for animals. Kanhai works of Krishna. who nurtures stray dogs in her home. We had India’s first major photography exhibition of 250 photographers and broke all sales records. In an interview Maneka Gandhi. Never before has such an exhibition been conceptualised and presented. 000 antique tiles from haveli’s. Each PFA fundraiser is designed as a unique and spectacular event. Tshirts and shawls with designers. It also provides work to weavers. Art has never been translated onto carpets so we thought we would try to see whether we could bridge the gap. In fact. Then we did artistic candles of Dimple Kapadia. It needed many technical innovations but we have been successful.
you are saving a life. through the belief that air. Think protections of animals. I am delighted to prove the cynics wrong. We never ask our participating artists to do anything specifically. It is not easy to put together something involving so many bright and busy people.has become a PFA hallmark and makes our events so popular. India needs more young people like them to demonstrate that caring is all about sharing. reducing pain whether it be of a child. In my experience. How did you come to work in this field? Again. against injustice. Everyone is always very supportive. But there are thousands of people like me in India who give their time and ability unstintingly. just any form of art. I feel I handle nothing. cutting of forests. The prices start at Rs 35. the drying up of water. looking after the animal cause. They have no time to be mean and selfish! Youʼre known for being one of Indiaʼs most prominent environmental campaigners. What are the key environmental issues facing India at the moment? Overpopulation and the misuse of resources by a few people and their enormous greed. handling your constituency and being a member of a political party. Is there a specific unifying theme of an exhibition linked to animals? No. There are 500 other things going on together. the chopping of whole mountains like the Aravallis and the Shivalik hills to make stones for roads…. So we try to think of ways to interest buyers and collectors with unique items that are affordable.. talented committed people who change the world with their kindness. and the first name that comes to mind is yours. The heart is a door. They have to be sold something – even if it is just a card. Your devotion to animals is unbounded. I work just as hard for children. It gives you a feeling of elation that nothing else can bring you.000 with the most expensive being Rs 5 lakh (Raza. an animal or a family. it opens for all. Hussein) All the carpets will be accompanied by a certificate from the painter saying they are an authorised limited edition of his work. how do you handle everything? At times it does drive me mad. it is busy. But at the same time. It’s just that you know the animal part because the movement is still developing.. when it opens. We request them to give the best of what they have done. I simply have fun. And the busier they are the more willing are they to help. We . Therefore I study. The designers have responded with great generosity and remarkable efficiency. What was a reaction of people on this fundraiser issue initially? Are they sceptical or supportive? When we embarked on this fundraiser. What sparked off your interest in them? I was born like that! The point is. These are some of the crises every day and in each case a politician and a bureaucrat are responsible and get the money. Mining. What has inspired you to hold such exhibitions? Necessity! In India very few people give money freely for causes. my constituency. Do they not realise the irreversible damage that is being done? With exhibitions that are held once a year. If they had no children it would be okay but all of them have children and yet they do this. prevention of cruelty to animals. I have the power and ability to work for beings that have no one. a lot of people were sceptical about whether we’d be able to put together something involving so many bright and busy people. unregulated chemical use in factories and pesticides. 64 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 water and clean land is all we can leave our children and all the rest is irrelevant. research and campaign every day.
After all. their demands are getting shriller and shriller. but not that you love him or respect him. Think about this and then take a decision. I am shattered. What should I do? I cannot bear to cause my family pain (since they suspect nothing because I live what seems a normal life) by telling them that I am a homosexual and at the same time I cannot give in to their demand that I get married. love and respect are more important in the long run. but due to hard work and a lot of luck. And your generosity towards him seems to have just exacerbated his negative feelings. Should I do this? Jealousy and greed make people do terrible things and your friend was obviously not large-hearted enough to be happy over your success. These days. less ambitious than I am and also a year younger than I am. But everyone suspects from my manner and behaviour that I am gay. I insisted on joining a college in another city saying that it was the best college for the course I wanted to do. I have not confided in anyone including my college mates and so they find me strange and I don’t have any friends. I feel depressed all the time and sometimes I even feel suicidal. Since I am 30. But as things stand in our culture.Q I am in love with a man who is less intelligent than I am. Will we be happy if we get married? Oh boy. your gorgeous young man could develop a huge inferiority complex. But it wouldn’t be easy to pretend to be a woman all the time. trust him and you shouldn’t have someone you cannot trust involved in handling your affairs. You have mentioned his looks. He does not deserve a friend like you. Your friend doesn’t deserve to be given a second chance in your business. Of course. I have succeeded beyond my wildest dreams in a business I started and now find myself very rich. Now my mother is very upset with my behaviour and I too am not happy. My closest friend and I both come from a lower middle-class back ground. I do not want to go through sex change procedures since I am afraid of the painful and time-consuming process. less qualified than I am. What should I do? My family wants me to hand him over to the police. But I can’t openly live like that. From the beginning I looked after my friend and made him a part of my business. They then carve out a life for themselves openly in the gay community. That was two years ago when I was 17 and since then I have made excuses for not going home during the holidays. But since then he has misbehaved with me by touching my private parts and breasts whenever my mother is not at home and we are alone together. But if you still have any feelings for him. Sometimes I feel that I just cannot keep things to myself any more but I know that if my mother comes to know what happened to her only 65 . I cried and screamed loudly and he did not succeed. many lesbians and homosexuals are finding the courage to come out of the closet (especially if they live in one of the metros) and tell society about their sexual orientation. because people are likely to laugh and make snide comments about his being supported by you. do not hand him over to the police. Then cut him out of your life. is he gorgeous looking! I am 23 now and am ready to support him all my life. But living a lie is not easy and you will have to do that all your life. you probably have facial hair and a deeper voice than women have. do you have the hots for him! Many men marry less educated. If you don’t have the guts to face your parents. I am sorry about this because several of them. beautiful women and lead extremely happy lives. but now I have discovered that he has been systematically cheating me from the start. tell him that you will do that if he does not make good the money he has taken from you. as a man. And while sex is certainly important in a marriage. this would really be the best option. especially my room-mate. QA & I am a woman trapped in a man’s body! I am a man but I feel like a woman and am happiest when I’m dressed as a woman or when I am in the company of women friends and men I am attracted to. Instead. my father tried to rape me. society or sex change procedures. You wouldn’t be able to Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 When I was 12-years-old. you only have the option of going on living in the closet. But boy. You shouldn’t get married just to maintain your cover because that would be doing a great injustice to the woman you marry. less ambitious. were very friendly initially. If you can find the courage to speak frankly to your parents. you could move to another place and live there as a woman and live a lie only when you come home to visit your parents. can I? So I dress like a woman only when I’m locked in my room and do not let my male friends know that I find them very attractive. When I finished my 12th standard. Again.
children. Now all that has happened.child. she would not be able to bear it. What should I do? You should look at the matter maturely. he probably does not look at you because he is embarrassed. He has to either marry you or lose you. If you tell your daughter about your affair with the boy she loves. we are active. but that is not enough. Is there any medicine I can take to remain slim? What has happened to you happens to many people. a bad character but because you. Your life will not be finished if he doesn’t have the courage to marry you. Though I have never been into sports or been a very active person. It would also help if you opened up and talked to friends your own age. I suddenly began to put on weight. I fell in love with my neighbour’s son. For three glorious years we had a wonderful. Then he went to college and our affair came to an end. I was slim and never had any problems with my weight till two years ago. our bodies do not need as much food as earlier and we begin to eat a lot of junk food. but you will definitely get over your love for a coward. he could not have failed to know till now that you belonged to a different caste and that his parents were narrowminded. You desperately need counselling to be able to get over the nightmare you have been living ever since you were 12. There are medicines which some doctors claim can make a person lose weight. my boyfriend and I planned to get married after we completed our education and got jobs. QA & get a wife. a married woman and mother more than twice his age. our bodies are growing and our parents usually see that we have a healthy diet. It would be best if you agreed to your daughter’s marriage to this young man and then hope that he does not reveal details of the affair you had with him to your daughter or to the world. He also says that they will insist on his getting married and that he will have to accede to their wish. But he says that he will love me forever and that I should remain unmarried and that we should be lovers all our lives. and this is why you are so confused. I love this man deeply. never have kids and cause your parents pain. He will 66 I was married off by my parents when I was very young and was the mother of two by the time I was 20. but do so only if you feel that she is the type to be supportive and that she will not shy away in shock. I am all confused. you must think of yourself and not her feelings. But when we become adults and begin to work or get married. Now I am 40. You could talk to your roommate. Can’t you imagine the consequences of such an act? Do not even think of it. At other times I feel that I should approve of the match because the boy has joined his father in their family business and my daughter will have a good life in their family. but they all have side-effects and are nowhere as effective as they are claimed to be. It is in fact surprising that she did not suspect from your behaviour all these years that something was seriously wrong in your life. She should know what a terrible person her husband is. Now. came onto him and he could not refuse the temptation. When we are young. That 15-year-old boy had an affair with you not because he has Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 I am 24-years-old. Ever since we were in college. when you were very immature. So we begin to put on weight. you should tell your mother what you have been going through. And as for love and marriage. So give your boyfriend an ultimatum. Your father needs to be punished for his despicable behaviour. Now. You have to exercise and control your intake of food. But soon after I began working. But first of all. What should I do? I am a rather lazy person. Both his parents and my husband are all for the match. The boy doesn’t even look at me now and this only makes me feel even surer that he is not the right boy for my daughter. you cannot be lazy. So welcome to the world of adults and watch your weight! . Should I agree to what he says though my parents would be heartbroken if I did not marry and have children? It would be very silly for you to give in to your boyfriend’s extremely selfish demand and agree to lead a life in which you would get nothing and he would get everything. it is you she will consider a bad character and not him. but my boyfriend has dropped a bombshell by telling me that his parents will never accept me as their daughter-in-law because I belong to another caste and that they will commit suicide if he marries me. keep a formal distance from him even after he becomes your son-in-law. we are less active. sexually satisfying affair. It is also strange that he should have raised this matter of caste so late in your relationship. You will certainly be unhappy for some time. If you want to lose weight. but I don’t know what to do. his parents’ approval and a place in society while you will have to keep your relationship with him a secret. Now I am quite plump. you will find that there are many more fish in the sea. What should I do? You are obviously traumatised by the terrible things done to you by the person who should have been your strongest support and protector. Now that boy is 21 and he and my 20-year-old daughter have fallen in love with each other. You did well by getting away from your father as soon as you could. Six years ago. Sometimes I feel that the boy is not of a good character (because of how he behaved with me) and that I should tell my daughter about our affair so that she breaks up with the boy. You got married far too early. After all. He was then 15 and he too fell in love with me. To ensure this. So we eat a lot and yet we remain slim. And don’t worry.
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You have done masterʼs in “ethnomusicology”. Taal. Rahman's music in the film Indira. A FRIEND SENT MY CD TO A R REHMAN AND HE GAVE ME A BREAK IN HIS FILM INDIRA. By Shakti Koushik the time I can remember. Besides this. What is it? The study of music groups – ethnic groups is ethnomusicology. She has been singing regularly for all the top music directors in the Tamil. The President of India Gold Medal in 1987 for carnatic and light classical music and the Central government senior Fellowship in 1989 add to her list of many achievements. She has also sung in the Hindi film Ram Jaane. Balasubramaniam. Excerpts from the interview: When did you start learning music ? I started learning music right from PLAYBACK SINGING HAPPENED TO ME BY CHANCE. S. She was awarded a Platinum disc for record sales for her song Phenk Hawa composed by Anu Malik.S. and M. it is really unfortunate that he passed away. Biwi no. Dr T. The lush green surroundings of the restaurant coupled with rain made it a perfect time to talk to noted singer Anuradha Sriram. THAT WAS MY DEBUT IN PLAYBACK SINGING. my all-time favourites are S. She has been singing hits like Acham Acham Illai set to A. Vishwanathan. S. Lagaan. Sri Manikbhua Takurdas.A WOMAN WEARING MANY HATS S 76 Interesting insight into the life of a very distinguished and versatile singer. R. Sangita Kalanidhi. My mother Renuka is the one who started teaching me music. How do you feel when the songs you sing are picturised in bad taste? When I sing a song then I am lending my voice to the character.1. She was one of the pioneers of stage shows in her time. I am okay about it. What kind of music did you learn? I mainly learnt Carnatic music and in my summer holidays I used to travel to Bombay and learn Hindustani classical. Jis Desh mein Ganga Rehta Hai. I like Whitney Houston and I also liked Pavarotti. However. That was my debut in playback singing. It does not show my character or scruples. kalyamaramam. she learned western classical opera and jazz. T. Brinda. "Malarodu from Bombay. Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . It is done because it is commercially viable. Janaki and Asha Bhosle. So. Her voice was used in the Tamil dubbed version of the Lion King. U. if I am given a song that makes me uncomfortable then I refuse to sing such songs. However.A. Connecticut. Meenamma to Deva in Aasai'. Thennattu from Pasumpon and Nalam Nalam from Kaadhal Kottai. Who is your idol in music? All my gurus – starting from my Mother Renuka.. Mehndi Hasan and Shobha Gurtu (I feel elated when I hear her songs . Among the western singers. and Deewanapan. Telugu and Malayalam film industries. I wish I had met all these people in person). Kumar Gandharv. A friend sent my CD to A R Rehman and he gave me a break in his film Indira. A. she performed in Indonesian and West African music concerts. he is a gold medalist in both B. I was three years old. He took opera singing to a different level and moulded it so that a large number of people can enjoy it. A. Sri Tanjavur. You are a classical singer…How and when did you take up playback singing? Playback singing happened to me by chance. P. I have listened to many of her songs and learnt from them. Shirley Meier (Western classical guru) and last but not least my husband Sriram Parasuram. in music from Madras University. She was given a fellowship to do her master’s in world music from Wesleyan University. I am also a great fan of Bade Ghulam Ali Khan. While in the U. Hindi.
There is a lot of work to do. Playback singing is also dear to me because. I believe that by remixing them and picturising them like this we are doing injustice to our culture. It is meant for patients who are in the final stages of cancer and experience a lot of pain. I also learn music from him. as women. “A Woman has to wear many hats”. We finish the antara and then take a tea-break. Are these material things more important or the time spent with your husband and children? Is earning more money more important or being there to nurse a brazed knee. What do you do when you are not singing? “My husband and I are both into music. And we have to have our priorities right. Like I mentioned earlier. I have learnt a lot from it. Have you composed music? I have composed music along with my husband for Mani Ratnam’s production Five Star in Tamil and Chennai Pop Saawariya in Hindi – both these albums got awards. shoes and jewellery do we really need? We have to prioritise. So. I do not like them. so we like to try out new types of food and discuss recipes with friends. both of us are complete foodies. I hear that you do a lot of charity work. I want to be there when they laugh or cry or throw a tantrum. They represent a particular era of music and I believe that it should be left unpolluted. I can safely say that I love both. I make sure that I do my recording only when they are at school and I am back when they come back. sing and come back. What difference do you find between Bollywood and Kollywood? Well. then you feel really good and you build a good rapport with them. We 77 July (Second) 2010 . so we have lots of discussions on music. How many cars. Tell us more about it. What are your latest songs and currently what are you working for? Recently. We have to draw a line between how much we really want. alternative medicine therapy is offered to patients. Bollywood has a more relaxed attitude. it is a pleasure working in both. We enjoy our work and want to be independent. What shows do you prefer? Live shows or playback? I like live shows because you get to improvise and when you see the audience enjoying. So. The songs are deconstructed from the way they are. My husband and I are one of the six trusties of ‘Jeevika’ which is an orphanage and an old-age home. both my husband and I try to plan our recordings such that either one of us is at home to take care of them 24/7. we have to make difficult choices.What do you think of remixes? Frankly. we are both busy being parents to our children. However. So. I have also sung songs for Himesh Reshammiya and Anuji Anu Malik. it is an on-going process. right now. clothes. I have sung in the movie ʻAriya and ʻMalai Kotaiʼ. Chennai. I believe that composing new genre of songs is all great but we should not pollute the original great songs. Sometimes. And. through this department. phones. very organised and I can go at the appointed time. my husband and I arrange our schedules in such a way that one of us is always there with the children. So both have their way of functioning and I enjoy working for both. How do you balance home and work? I believe that we all have to make our choices in life. Only then can we balance home and work. or play with the kids? This balance cannot be achieved a hundred per cent. Other than that. Kollywood is very. There are enough and more songs to sing but I try to keep them when my children are at school so that I am there for them. We also support the palliative care unit of the Cancer Institute. I want to experience the joy of bringing them up and taking care of them. relax a little and then record again. They Woman’s Era ● are also provided with counselling so that they are able to deal with this difficult time.
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” the news he gave me. time I heeded your advice.” man asked for.....” I’ve already got he asked. “ Excellent.. I am ready to “Deepu.STORY SHORT When Deepu Wed Debbie Ever witnessed a kanyadaan ceremony where six excited persons jointly give away the bride? By Romola Shanbhag W hen Deepak made his usual week-end call She wants the whole works.. we are getting married in Delhi ready. isn’t it?” of a church wedding. of our lives..jaymala.” said with Deepu child’s marriage here in Delhi.” get married. I think it’s I couldn’t believe my ears.. the better.” We’ll work it all out..” I know it will mean a lot of work giving me grand scale. Mom.Mom.” he said.” my bride..You’ll “It’s fine. Mom.” Deepu giving me long-distance instructions busiest time “Relax.. from California. there will be enough time to stage.” bahu is entering our home.” he said.. After a marathon sitting with through my head.. bridal gown. “In Delhi?” I was taken aback.. American.. Mom.. the marriage. from traditional Hindu wedding. I was in celebrations. I was least prepared for havan. And soon.she’s. You’ll be surprised to waist to crotch. Images make any small alterations....” tailors will need. my heart thudding. Jewish. bridesmaids.” It’s okay with you and Dad. began to jot down measurements: shoulder to “Mom. And she wants the authentic to the nicest girls in our community. I 80 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 .and. Deepak told us. isn’t it?” “Wait. of activity despair. wanted to be a part of the I didn’t want to hear more. I gave a shriek of “I didn’t. Several of Debbie’s family.er... our family darji. Debbie did about all this than I do!” not like banquet halls or marriage shamianas.. with all the rituals and but I’ll send you all the measurements the long-distance ceremonies.Even in know that she is writing a thesis on Hindu culture my dreams. saat pheres. Debbie is fully at every stage..” American? Is And that started the busiest time of our started the she. A great flurry of activity followed with Japanese or. Please keep everything instructions “Mom.since we will land a week before at every itself.” I wailed.” A great flurry it seemed...Chinese American.” Deepu laughed.etc.... I didn’t realise you knew all these rituals.she says the more traditional. I told you she knows everything. She’s more as soon as possible and I’ll introduce you Indian than I am.” he returned gleefully. Wait till I tell Indian ambience too.kanyadaan. “And.or.” But now..” Debbie filled me joy. I I spoke quickly. I was doing this! and tradition for her Phd.etc.” “Yeah. Deepu beta.” I said. let me explain. Debbie wants a very shoulder. from neckline to waist. Mom.. Mom. Come down in. they want to be dressed in followed “I had waited to celebrate our only authentic Indian clothes.so stop worrying. over the phone. around waist...” love her. and a five-tier wedding cake swam agreed nervously.. around the fullest bust..Debbie.” She’s really great.on such a Deepu.” He paused. she knows more Choosing the venue was a challenge. I sent him a list of all that the “Why Delhi? Your Daddy and I will come there. Debbie Gordon. or we could have got married Daddy.. “ “What?!” She’s set her heart on getting married in a temple.” And that My heart sank. “Mom. lives.he will be thrilled to know that finally a in one of the many Indian temples here itself.
brown and platinum hair lowered dutifully as we placed garlands of marigold he girl dimpled and said shyly. the group descended on us.” “Mom. Needless to say.” But which .ze.. Maji. golden. Deepak herded the group like a conscientious sheep dog. there was all-round satisfaction and praise for his work. Introductions were attempted but nothing really registered in the general medley. heads of red. Cameras slung from shoulders and faces sported huge excited grins. our American sambandhis arrived at Indira Gandhi International Airport. We watched with fluttering hearts as a small contingent of passengers accompanied by Deepak came out to the arrival lounge. Everything was finally ready for the Big Day.” T T en days before the red-letter day.“Temple?”I asked. Large white freckled arms engulfed us in bear hugs and loud smacks on cheeks. Mom. As I embraced her. straw hats and bandanas. talking. In moments. .. Deepak caught my eye and raised his hand with thumb and index finger together to say that we had done everything just right. you see. My giggling nieces sprinkled rose water on them and placed large red tilaks on obliging foreheads. accommodating the guests in the temple premises did not pose a problem.” and in one graceful movement bent forward to touch our feet. Deepu gave me a didn’t-I-tell-you? look over her shoulder..” Mom. shopping.. Dad. this is Debbie. There was no other topic going round than “Deepu’s wedding”.” It’ll mean the world to her. And we returned home.And then he drew forward a pretty smiling redhead and said. Only minor adjustments were needed and made..” Namaste. Our tailor had wreaked minor miracles in outfitting persons he had never set eyes upon. she won our hearts for ever. tired. A short while later. Pu. The following days were spent in sightseeing and “fittings” of the wedding clothes..le. tasting food and taking movies on webcams. Babuji.” Thankfully we homed in on a derelict temple on the outskirts of Delhi. Permission to use it was sought and granted without much trouble. I revelled in all the attention I was awarded in my friends’ circle. towards where we waited. Debbie charmed everyone with her cheerful face and brave attempts to speak in Hindi. wearing baggy pants and enormous cooling glasses. isn’t there any old temple structure which can be hired for a wedding ceremony?” he asked hopefully. Since we had decided to make the ceremony exclusive to close friends and relatives. and completely happy. In that instant. over them. spent. the bridal party left in several taxis to the hotel where we had reserved suites for them.e. Nothing was scrutinised and discussed more avidly than his bride’s folks who were all about the place. Some perfunctory cleaning up was undertaken keeping in mind Deepu’s injuction not to spoil the ancient look of the premises.
and she is not even Indian !” My gaze went to Debbie who stood by chatting with our son. I hope Pam and Dick Gordan are ready and prepared to participate in all the rituals? Panditji will guide them all the way.saath janams.” You mean.ah. All the elders are parents and all the of us.” Sit down elders in the group are in some way or other comfortably.” 82 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 D .Thank together earnestly.” and so are Ben and Joy Taylor as well as Goldie and Tom Crystal..how.” “Yes. Debbie has not explained this well to you as yet.”I began... It was her father’s second wife Goldie who steered her through the turbulent teen years. My mind was working overtime.“ You are very lucky.. Mom... Deepu sat in front nutshell.. It’s always English.” My head reeled and I could see a glazed look close over my husband’s eyes. leaned forward and locked his fingers youngsters are her stepsisters and brothers.” You lost me early on.. They are all her parents.Arr.. she will not let me!” I wasn’t listening to him. I thought to myself. ” But then..gh..t?” we cried.. it was her stepfather Ben who brought her up.. required adjustments.” not raise any dog eyes which never have failed to melt “What.why. how can they be left out?’ His father and I looked at each other in shock. can you believe it? She refuses to speak in Hindi. Goldie separated from Dick and married Tom Crystal and Dick’s wife is now Pam.. Two days before the day..” I told him..in fact. you know.. explained :” I think. we cornered Deepu. you’ve worked it out so splendidly.but I think Gordan.so there’s no need for them to feel anxious..you..” We had to search long and far to get a suitable bride from our community for our son.” What do. she wants Goldie to give her away.” Deepu looked relieved.” “But they are all so friendly and.so......” Debbie’s ‘Leave me out.t..” Son. Goldie and different But all that I could manage by way of Dick divorced . I think. when common.and. most of the eepu led us gently to the settee..we need the bride’s parents..People are separating all the time. Dad.” It and he went ahead to marry Pam..they separate as friends. Madhu. she wears this outfit even to temples! But look. Dick married Goldie and soon appeal! “I’ll son looking at me appealingly with puppy Ben Taylor married Joy.. but then. “Yeah.. Mom knows...Finally. you know..” His naivete amused me as his father.” became quite I’ve caught the general drift. I found my voice first. She vows this will be true for us. objection if my heart from the time he was a kid.. “ He smiled before saying reassuringly.” as the bride’s seemed to satisfy Deepu for he walked out “Whaa.. “Why do you keep saying ‘What? different The family panditji threw up his hands in What?’ like that?” Deepu demanded times.. god..gh.” “I know..” Saroj Chopra told me crossly..” Yup! That’s it.. both of you.” returned Deepu cheerfully.. you know in the kanyadaan ceremony. they need not tell me. Debbie swears she was never really close to Joy.. they don’t bear any rancour.” D eepu shook his head... Mom. Earlier.. whistling the bridal march. Debbie wants all of them.” My daughter-in-law lives in jeans and sweaters.” his father biological parents are Joy Taylor and Dick Panditji groaned.” Deepu said. and so she feels more daughterly towards him than anyone else. “All her parents? Six of them?!” cried my husband and me in one voice.” He took a deep breath and began.but they separated when she after this Mom. all very easy.” That can’t be. parents at of the room. really. even if I wish to divorce.. “But then.” In the U. I know myself that I am very lucky. she says.” he began.. son.. smiling.. in a We slumped down and waited.t.t. indeed. after all.” said our was a kid.. it. It’s Debbie’s parents?” I stuttered.. but all the six of them want to take part. “She wants Joy and Dick because they are her biological parents. you know.we found Swati...S this kind of stuff is very he said.but then... Dad.and. a few years later.t?” we shrieked.so.. let Joy Taylor and Dick Gordan do the kanyadaan.He is Dad to her in the real sense of the word..” “It’s like this.she is completely smitten by our Indian concept of being married for seven births.t..... but they are the real parents.” “What.” It will look odd. They think it is boring to be married to the same person all through life. “Oh. “But you don’t have to worry about Debbie and me.. cooperative “Don’t worry. But your American bahu is trying her level best to learn our language! How lucky you are!” Kanta Kapoor expressed similar sentiments..let me explain. and I’ll explain. how nice your Debbie looks in her salwar kameez. you see.they also have to ‘give’ the daughter away. they are ready.t?!!” we bawled .. She married Tom Crystal persons come reply was a “ Ye.” despair when we told him about the testily. I am depending on you.. “But then.
” he said. incense sticks and rangoli patterns on the floors. he had almost forgotten most of the long mantras.” IT’s like giving away the bride. Panditji?”asked my husband soothingly. shervanis and bandgallas..” he offered.” said Panditji. “And the second option?”I asked. D eepu and Debbie were the cynosure of all eyes.. bitterness and grief but these ex-wives and ex-husbands are all like one big happy family!” Another hurdle had been negotiated successfully.” How will they decide?” “I’ll tell them to draw lots. “Correct. “Won’t there be difficulty choosing the first pair of parents?” I asked.” supplied my husband. Our Indian guests enthusiastically assisted the visitors in every possible way.which pair of parents will do this?” We put the question to Deepu who at once claimed that all six parents would want to do it.” “Ah. “Yeh.. but would refresh his memory from his diaries.” “These people are really amazing!” breathed my husband with awe. the first ‘electric current’ method is better. A buzz of curious conversation began among 83 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . “In the confusion.I think.a divorce brings such a lot of acrimony.” Here. Joy and Ben Taylor stepped into the decorated mandap officiating as Debbie’s Mom and Dad.. They all love her and will listen to anything she says. tastefully decorated with garlands. isn’t it? I’m sure there will be a stampede in the mandap.”And the sacred milk can be poured in a joint effort. “The six persons can all stand in a line. so to say. so that our new daughter-in-law was not disappointed. Soon.” he prophesied fearfully.we had told him that we wanted a proper traditional wedding. the kalash may drop. His bride in a bloodred gagra choli and jewellery which threatened to weigh her down was the picture of demure beauty. The men made an impressive sight in their embroidered kurtas. as the ceremonies began. In fact. which is a very important ritual. lamps. he confessed candidly.. our guests looked puzzled as Goldie and Tom welcomed everyone but later at the jaymala function.. It was a wedding to remember. And... in our country.” he said. cholis were tugged down and dupattas placed over shoulders. he could.”You simply do what you have to do.” Three pairs of parents? Hai. “That could be messy.” supplied the panditji. He offered two options. It was a beautifully balmy March evening when everyone congregated at the small temple.” I said.and you can expect a little something extra for your trouble. knowledgeably.. this Kali Yug!!” “Why are you concerned who will appear as the bride’s parents for the different rituals.” Debbie will take care of it..” Deepu liked the idea too.” said our ever optimistic son. he had been thrown into confusion as he had quite got used to modern-day truncated ceremonies. it was Pam and Dick who came forward as the bride’s parents. clearly pleased by his own resourcefulness.” P anditji became quite cooperative after this appeal! “I’ll not raise any objection if different persons come as the bride’s parents at different times. “All of them stand in a circle with their hands on the kanyadaan kalash. Slipping sari pleats were retrieved from the ground and pinned into place. touching the person in front of each while the first couple will do the actual kanyadaan.” This will keep them connected. you see.. She can even pretend it is the way we do it here in India. As expected. He looked dashing and handsome in a dark blue zari-worked kurta and the sehra of flowers on his face. now this.” but the kanyadaan. All wore marigold garlands and large red tilaks on their foreheads. kaise ho sakta hai?” he demanded.It will be as if all of them are doing the kanyadaan.” Can the panditji do something? Indeed. like electricity passing through a wire. it turned out. you know.
My uncle was also crying inconsolably. His daughter’s marriage was only two days away and in case of my grandma’s death before the marriage. making the “connection. gave the signal. Marriage day arrived and the next evening the bride left for her new home. The doctor treating her lost hope and one evening.which they had picked up shopping in Janpath the day before. Panditji started his mantras loud and sonorous while the shehnai went into an earsplitting crescendo. we have two members added to our family. He stood up thankfully. I saw my grandma laid motionless on her bed. With authority.red. while not having any spare set to keep herself warm in the chilly morning of January... Every one of us was concerned with her health. People started pouring in with tears in their eyes to see her. my youngest brother-in-law went to the mike and explained the unique situation in a few choice words. touched her feet for blessings and got busy in preparing for the marriage. The next morning. Now. he sat by her side. Goldie wore a white hat with her peacock blue Kanjeevaram sari. her trips to the village households reduced and then totally stopped because of her failing health. Then. without doubt. A blue-eyed.” Brimming with importance. who had once chided my grandma for her generosity. Gujarat. occasionally coughing and opening her eyes.. what better arrangement could have been conceived to honour all these important parent figures in the bride’s life? T he highlight of the wedding was. touched her feet and thanked her for keeping her words and saving him from trouble. While we cried. when my grandma did not lend a helping hand to someone in need. His explanation was heard in attentive silence and followed by nods of approval and smiles of understanding.haired five-year-old Revati and a chubby. dusky. I woke up to the loud wails of my mother and aunts. Immediately after the departure of his daughter. Deepu’s and Debbie’s kids.It was the talk of our community for a long. Pam and Dick had long strings of beads around their necks. there she lay. was simply talking through his hat! affirmative. Everyone seemed to say. She was always there to help the poor and the villagers in dire need of food. One of us always remained by her side. he rushed to my grandma. the marriage would not take place and it wasn’t possible to hold it before her first death anniversary. That evening. and Tom had his cowboy shoes beneath his silk churidaar. Grandma remained stable. our grandchildren. Everyone declared that it had been a beautiful and meaningful ceremony. beti ki shaadi kaa yagna paar karaa dijiyega na? My grandma opened her eyes. still and with a hint of smile on her face. She always remained calm. each of them carefully placed a hand on the person in front. I also remember an incident when my grandma was chided by one of my uncles for giving away her woollen blouse and shawl to a destitute woman.. the kanyadaan ceremony when six excited persons strode purposefully into the small mandap almost crowding out the poor Panditji and the grinning Deepu. looked at him peacefully and signalled her approval by closing her eyes and nodding in Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . Getting into the spirit of things. six-month old David. But not a single day passed. clothes or any other kind of help she could manage for them. And then the kanyadaan line was formed headed by Goldie and Tom Crystal! They presented an interesting assembly. composed. six years later. when Panditji with calm authority. With old age catching up fast. cheerful and generous.the congregation as people wondered what was going on. Chaachi. With every passing day her health was deteriorating. I understand today the meaning of that smile – it was nothing but an expression of ‘the joy of giving’! – Madhukar Mohan. My uncle and everyone else felt relieved. A sumptuous lunch followed the marriage where the guests dipped into the delicious spread. dead! I still remember her wrinkled face – with an exceptionally relaxed and peaceful expression. With only a few bighas of ancestral land among our big joint family. held her hand with both of his hands and whispered in her ear. we ourselves were not very comfortable economically. to pay gratitude to her selfless service and to bid goodbye. as long as I remember during my childhood. and ne’er the twain shall We meet. But my grandma remained insulated to all the chiding she received from the 84 family members for her generosity.. The joy of giving My grandma was a great philanthropist. East is East and West is West.. he declared that she could leave any moment for her final journey. I vouch that whoever said. With great insight and wit. But most concerned amongst us was my uncle. Pam wore huge dark glasses while Dick’s straw hat was so rakishly worn that it threatened to fall into the havan.long time. She slowly opened her eyes and her lips moved a bit to give a smile in acknowledgement. all the guests broke into spontaneous applause as a smiling Debbie was given away by her six parents into the willing hands of her exultant groom..
Q I am 18 years old and a few days before the start of my menstrual cycle. Further you may use a knee cap while going out. Depending on your hair colour you can select the hair dye of any good standard company. While palpating my breast I observed small palpable masses which were highly mobile. You have to accept that you are growing up and the greyness of hair is a sign of ageing. moody with poor concentration in my studies as well as some degree of depression. there is no hard and fast rules in this regard. an ovulatory infertility persists for five weeks in non-lactating women and eight weeks or more in lactating women. Cut down on your intake of coffee and colas. lose interest in sex. Many women who had an episotomy done. Unfortunately my hair has started going grey. Please help. Knee pain in young women can be due to various causes. Your fears are well founded. Also avoid lifting heavy objects. Besides medical problems like wearing of high heels. Your kind advice is solicited. I get irritable. Q I am 40 years old. Avoid synthetic clothes. do stretch exercises to make the muscles round about knee strong. Please advise as to when I can resume normal sexual activity. Women who had no such problem generally partake in sex in six weeks. A friend told me to avoid hair dye since it can cause hair loss. Avoid fried and spicy foods. Take a lot of fresh fruits and green vegetables. My problem is that I have started getting pain in my knees which makes walking difficult. What it occurs in some women is not clear but it is related to hormonal levels in the body. it is equally essential to get a biopsy done to exclude any malignant growth. they will require surgical excision. The return to sexual activity after delivery will vary in different women. I am scared lest I have got cancer of the breast. These are soft and rubbery. Though these swellings are not considered cancerous. I have delivered a baby two weeks back. Do not panic. Trim the hair there regularly since these are likely to entrap the bacteria. I do not know what it is. Khosla. If these become too big. But this should be done only under medical advice. cannot resume sexual activity earlier than four months because of perineal discomfort. What you have got is premenstrual syndrome (PMS) which is quite common in young women. You should consult your doctor who will prescribe the required medicines. but there is no report of loss of hair by the use of hair dye. My problem is that I sweat excessively in my armpits. you will have to be careful. All must be guided by the health of the young mother. These attacks may not last for long and get controlled in the appropriate time. . In fact. N. Please help. Probably what you are feeling are small fibroadenomas which are benign tumours generally found in young women. Please help. I am very worried. Please help. Wash your underarms regularly with a good antibacterial soap. it could be walking on uneven surfaces and bad posture. postpartum. As per advice change your footwear. who will inject Botox in the underarms to block the release of enzymes responsible for the stimulation of excessive secretion of sweat from sweat glands. It will help in firming up your knee joint. Q & A I am 25 years of age and recently married. For this maintain good hygiene of the area. Please tell me the time till I may not use any contraceptive method. First you must consult your doctor who after examining and investigating you will be able to find the cause of your problem. This emits not only bad odour but also creates embarrassment. You probably suffer from excessive activity of the sweat glands. The size of these masses varies and sometimes enlarge. If you are overweight then it would be advisable to reduce. Q Q I am a 30-year-old executive. — Dr S. Avoid climbing stairs too much.Q I am 25 years old and have recently delivered a baby whom I am breastfeeding. poor nutrition and bad hair hygiene. I am very worried. you can take the help of a plastic surgeon. Dust your underarms with lot of talcum powder. In case all these measures fail. Most young women may feel fatigued and those who are breastfeeding their baby. The major drawback with the use of hair dye is the development of allergic reactions for which I am 30 years old. Grey or white hair in any person develops due to various factors like genetics. Depending on hormonal balance these masses may decrease in size. MD. Please advise. This contraception effect of lactation is generally present up to six months but in later months it may be desirable to supplement sex activity with other contraceptive methods. As a rule.
the kid is all set for a cycling competition. without robbing him of his innocence. . In a colourful half-sleeved chequered shirt. Here is Mehar in different outfit. In jeans. the boy is ready for a game of tennis.The little master Proper clothing can transform the looks of even a kid and fashion out an attitude in him which makes him look business-like. jersey and goggles. half pants and sports boots. a slanting cap.
and attired in sports clothes.Equipped with sun-protection device and dressed in the best ultra way. the lad has a football under his foot for action. the boy is ready to step out. In a jogging shoes. .
something went awry somewhere. I t’s good news indeed that the Dads – Dharmendar. K R akesh Roshan may well have created a record by releasing Kites with the largest number of prints in India and abroad but. start shooting for Neeraj Pathak’s Gannit. She doesn’t care for the length of the role so long as the film does well. alas. In a bid to make an impression in the global arena. film”? Obviously. Deewana”. Dharmendar and Bobby in “Yamla. Wasn’t it a little too early to write off the Deols. the film didn’t live up to his expectations. it is all the more important that Raajneeti ends the dry spell at the box office. before long. Pagla. For her small role in Prakash Jha’s Raajneeti. We decided to see whether we can really make it a global atrina Kaif concedes that she has a problem of accent but asserts that she is not a foreigner. With kites having failed. he West looks to India for the song-and-dance fare with a story that has an Indian essence such as in Monsoon wedding.B O M B A Y F I L M D O M Katrina Kaif and Ranveer Kapoor in “Raajneeti”. Hrithik Roshan and Katrina Kaif in “Kite”. The Namesake or Bandit Queen which it didn’t find in Kites. Anurag Basu says in my career it is just another film. Pagla. a title taken from a song in Pratigya (a Dharmendar-Hema starrer) and that Sunny will. When we took the film to Cannes and saw the reaction of the foreign press our confidence grew. the film-makers in the opinion of a critic forgot that the basic foundation of a film is a good story with Indian ambience. Deewana. Sunny and Bobby – are presently working in Samir Karnik’s Yamla. particularly Sunny? . she worked hard for 28 days on her dialogues. It did not soar past 3 idiots on the box office sky. T T he director of kites. Sunny.
Kareena Kapoor. the highest paid reigning leading lady in filmdom. .
t will not be inappropriate to say that it is almost a windfall for Sonam amir Khan. Kareena Kapoor and Sharman Joshi starrer 3 Idiots which reaped gold at the box office was slated to be screened at the inaugural Aruba International Festival hosted by Hollywood actor Richard ncouraged by the huge success of Love Aaj Kal. The film is based on writer Ruskin Bond’s story or novel Susannaʼs Seven Husbands. with friends in Barbados from where he flew to London in a private plane! It is reported from the sets of Patiala House. t seems gone are the days when stars used to throw tantrums resulting in cancellation of shooting schedules. a talented and committed actor who has been around for umpteen years. now Ajay is damn good at comedy too. Although his film Gandhi – My Father didn’t do so well at the box office. Kabhi Khushi kabhi Gham and Omkara to name only three. and that he always looks at the positive side of things. Priyanka plays wife to seven husbands in Saat Khoon Maaf being directed by vishal Bhardwaj. T M wo distinct plus points of Anil Kapoor are that he is always ready to take up challenging roles.P eople who want to make it big in life never look back. she can learn a lot from him. Anil Kapoor. No wonder. Anil Kapoor will be seen with daughter Sonam Kapoor. . some people told him he was backing a wrong horse. It’s their passion for work and professionalism which has taken them to the top. K I eeping in view the dictum ‘all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy’ Akshay Kumar (who has been over-busy for a couple of months) had a four-day vacation. To be directed by Sriram Raghavan. the five Pandava brothers. Priyanka Chopra is now one up on Draupadi (of Mahabharata)! Intrigued? While Draupadi had five husbands. these workaholics are where they are. but Dinesh was adamant and he did give a break to Ajay who has fully upheld the confidence of Dinesh. The film has been produced by Vidhu Vinod Chopra and directed by Rajkumar Hirani. the film will be an action adventure starring Saif Ali Khan and Kareena Kapoor in lead roles. Making a beginning as an action hero. E A B elieve it or not. Kapoor that she has been signed by Yash Raj Films to work in a film with (hold your breath) her father. Kareena Kapoor and Shah Rukh Khan stuck to their shooting schedules in spite of high fever working in different films. No wonder therefore his kitty is full and with challenging roles to boot. Surely. in Yash Raj Films’ new venture. I A lthough Jaya Bachchan withdrew her nomination to the Rajya Sabha by the Samajwadi Party on the ground that hubby Amitabh Priyanka Chopra plays wife to seven husbands in “Saat Khoon Maaf”. They always look ahead. Saif Ali Khan and Dinesh Vijan and their Illuminati Films have decided to join hands with Eros International Media Ltd to make Agent Vinod. Consequently. ore than two decades ago when producer Dinesh Patel gave a break to Ajay Devgan (whose starrer Raajneeti will have been released by the time these lines appear in print). 3 Idiots was stated to be screened at the Aruba International Festival. Having made her debut with Refugee in June 2000 she is reportedly the highest paid reigning leading lady in filmdom today who has done full justice to many roles such as in Chameli. he was signed for Slumdog Millionaire and had the first taste of international recognition. Example? Kareena Kapoor. Gere. it got him good deal of critical acclaim as a result of which all the CEOs of big production houses in Hollywood came to know him.
R. Munishwar. followed by a discussion on the film’s message regarding the education system. – Deepak Puri F Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 91 . the film will star Ajay Devgan. Idiots scaled new heights when it was screened at the united D ifferent people react to situations/incidents differently. Nations headquarters in New York. another person who must be the happiest at her decision will surely be her devar Chaudhary Amar Singh who was expelled from the party some time ago. He would have preferred Bhabhiji stopping to go to Rajya Sabha the day he was expelled. in the case related to the Intermediate college for girls he had planned to start in Daulatpur in the name of his bahurani Aishwarya Rai and had made an announcement with all the fanfare. it also inspired some. P. D R ohit Shetty must be one of the happiest man in filmdom today. T he tallest actor in filmdom (fun intended).Bachchan didn’t like her to contest. Akshay Kumar had a four-day vacation in Barbados. He claims Golmaal 3 “is a complete wholesome entertainer”. etermination backed by sustained effort always pays. Kalakar to be produced by Rajshri! harmila Tagore. Latest example? Tusshar Kapoor. ashion designer Ritu Beri who obviously must have designed wardrobes for many stars considers her collaboration with music wizard A. Emraan Hashmi and Omi Vaidya (Chatur of 3 idiots fame). The terrorists attack on Mumbai’s Taj Mahal hotel in November 2008 sent shock waves all around but believe it or not.P. Aparna Sen. but the college never took off the ground. Madhur Bhandarkar (of Chandani Bar fame) has now set his heart on directing a light-hearted film titled Dil Toh Bachcha Hai. The film titled Ashok Chakra has been directed by S. Rajkumar Hirani who was present on the occasion said he felt honoured to present his film to the UN. Rahman and large troupe will visit many countries. R. The film has already won a National Award. Amrita Rao will be his leading lady in the film titled Love you Mr. yes. Let’s hope he is proved right by the cinegoers. Some people had alleged financial irregularities too in the case. having become the ‘first director ever’ to make the third chapter of a film. Rahman Jai Ho The Journey Home World Tour 2010 which commenced on 11 June in New York her most thrilling experience to date. has finally bagged a solo hero film after doing quite a few multistarrers. The plight of the policemen who suffered in the attack moved writer Mohanish Sharan so much that he wrote a script from their perspective. for it is he who decided to cast her in Patiala House. Among others. Nikhil Advani and Akshay had seen her performing in Jhalak Dikhla Ja in the Giddha Bhangra episode and thought she was perfect for the role in Patiala House in which Akshay plays the male lead. Rahul Bose and Radhika Apte Tusshar Kapoor is solo hero in Rajshri’s film “Love you Mr Kalakar”. Rahman for A. Both Hindi and Tamil version of his film Raavan will be shown at the festival. Celebration time at the Bachchan household? A cting on the adage variety is the spice of life’. Amitabh Bachchan is in the news again for the welcome reason that he has been absolved by a court in U. Congrats Raj. The director of the film. 3 S H ard Kaur (an interesting name isn’t it?) would always be grateful to Akshay Kumar. the ultimate judges. The court has given a clean chit to Amitabh. yes Jeetendra’s son. starrer Antaheen made by Aniruddha Roy Choudhary was the only Indian entry to the Shanghai International Festival. I t’s a measure of his stature that director Mani Ratnam will be honoured with the ‘glory to the Filmmakers Award’ at the Venice Film Festival.
Too many considerations creep in putting those tears at bay. parent. adopted a child and moved on. piling up behind the eyes and in the brain. unable to deal with the loss. Crying is the best medicine: Cry away the pain. By Sucharita Dutta-Asane aya and her friend Gitanjali lost their sons in an accident.CURE FOR HEARTBREAK M How to deal with personal loss. This is often more difficult than it sounds. we leave almost no room for the present – or the future for that matter. and for many. Maya refused to take up the wheel or for that matter do anything else ever again. Maya’s son was behind the wheel when the truck slammed into them. But how many of us are able to cope with loss and get on with life? How easy is it? And what can one do to deal with the loss of a loved one – even a pet – in such a way that the past doesn’t keep intruding on the present? Is everything lost when we lose a lover. husband. or foetus in the womb? There is a lot more to life beyond the loss. Shattered beyond belief or expectation. the toughest option. Maya did just that and clutched her past so tight that it squeezed the breath out of her own present and future. child. A friend who lost her mother recently couldn’t cry . When the past crowds in on us. Maya gave up her job and stayed at home. waiting for the floodgates to open. Here are ways to recover from the trauma and carry on with life and its unfulfilled potential. she plunged into her teaching job with a renewed fervour.
she wanted to howl into the night. It stimulates secretions of sorotonin. With a negative approach. Taking it creates an artificial state of joy. a feeling of happiness. Their circle of care will serve as a protective shield and soothe the heartache without your realising it. If nothing works. accept: Don’t shut out the truth of what happened. everything is going to be all right. support yourself. so choose to accept and carry on. Gitanjali did the opposite. though it is a hurtful one. Live positive: When Maya refused to take up the steering wheel or resume her daily life. The vacuum threatens to engulf her at times and the fight is harder than it would have been at the time of crisis. Whatever the nature or personal attribute. The first step. write. which lessens as the effect of the drug wears off.because she had to think of her father and her mother’s mother.” There are no universal remedies. therefore. Some are happier crying. Pune. Exercise: A brisk walk. has this wonderful piece of advice for traumatised people: “At all times.” This could be the credo for bouncing back to life and liveliness. acquaintances and relatives who care for you. leaving you feeling lighter and more at peace. The stricken person needs to cry. she swallowed the tears. gossip and chatter are sure cures for the spirit. she swallowed the tears. the ‘happy hormone’ that is artificially created in the Prozac pill. Accept. Ratna Khemani. Wanting to howl. director. but the tears dried up long ago. The pain oozed out slowly. The past is past and. encourage yourself. “Exercise is an excellent antidote. try to be optimistic. burden she felt after losing her asyet-unborn-child. you can neither stop the tears when required nor take timely action. nothing could be more We effective. Not to cry is advice given thoughtlessly. while for others the burden lessens by helping others in need. THE MIND HAS A WAY OF OPENING DOORS AND WINDOWS LONG KEPT CLOSED. Laughter and music. accept. IT IS BEST TO ACCEPT THINGS AND TO MOVE ON. But when her three-yearold stared at the gathering tears in her eyes. That is what Gitanjali did but Maya didn’t. when it comes from within. dancing. the highest selling drug in the USA. just behind the eyelids. According to Ms Khemani. Center for Personality Development. Chetna filled a little bit of the vacuum by writing about her loss and pain. 95 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . But they were there. say to yourself. making her look more at pain than the two persons she had to look after. The pain still haunts her waking hours. The circle of care: Fighting loss alone is a horrific curse. Writing and talking erodes the pain. Writing about your feelings is like talking to yourself. Write: Writing is catharsis. is to accept the situation and move on. It is best to accept things and to move on. When Chetna lost her six-monthold foetus. be your own friend. If only she had shed the tears and explained her pain in some way to her child. aerobics. motivate yourself. spilled along the page and softened the rock-like DON’T SHUT OUT THE TRUTH OF WHAT HAPPENED. Try to live among friends. or a swim is just the big boost your heart may need. some minutes on the treadmill. every human being needs a salve for their emotional wounds and. to dilute the pain and stave off future heartache. leaving behind a vacuum that she fights to fill. The mind has a way of opening doors and windows long kept closed. Negative thinking is the antithesis of cure. The choice about the quality of life we want to lead lies in our hands. she slumped into negative thinking. it is still behind you.
K. He has done a doctoral thesis on the Jain art of the Chitrakut region and has honed his skills by working along with Jatin Das. Excerpts from an interview: Why do animals feature in almost all your paintings? For me. In actual fact. UP. 2007 • M.P. They are misfits in city life and yet man has subjected them to this torture. (Painting) & M. I know that domesticating or using animals is an age-old practice.Phil (History of Art) Lalit Kala Sansthan. K. 2005 About me: I am a full-time creative artist. R. at the hands of humans. 9911127216 Academic qualification: B. College of Art & Crafts. Agra 2003 • Swagat –2003. Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 .F. Utkal University. Bhubaneswar. Balasore. 1999 Publication (Book) Portraits of Agra. 2003 • All Indian Women’s Federation. We keep them for our own benefit and our status as human beings increases as we minister to them. especially through the medium of animals who cannot voice their feelings.A. his is the voice that is audible in bringing home the fact that other creatures on our fragile earth need a voice to put forth the sufferings they have to endure. kalarang kalasang. Agra Shows: 15 solo shows. colours and their eternal relationship along with the play of light that creates a sensation.ranjanmallikartist. animals are the sufferers rather than the beneficiaries of our actions. Having fulfilled his urge to be a practising painter. 2002 • Youth Festival. Ranjan Kumar Mallik has pushed the barriers of art still further and continued to add academic glory to his artistic inclinations. R. Ambedkar University. 2003 Visual Art. 96 THOUGHT PROCESS ANIMALS SYMBOLISE HIS An artist who aims to create a silent revolution in the mind of the viewer. but when one steps back T he artist is an all-rounder. Painting is not the subject of shapes. Dr. F. I try to decipher the feelings of these dumb folk and try to see how urban lifestyle is a modern-day torture imposed on them. Orissa. A. B. I paint because I wish to respond and communicate to this sensation. tones.Ambedkar University. P. Orissa. 20 camp shows and nine seminars in India. B.Kalabhushan. Dr. What are the emotions that you like to portray on your canvases? It is the sufferings linked with urban life that comes to the fore. 2003 • Lalitkala Sketch Award. By Subhra Mazumdar I observe nature silently. 2002 • B.Pratibhashree • First Award in College Painting. 2000 • S. Mostly I like the human figure and animals in an abstract background for visual aesthetics. Awards: • National Award . (Painting) B. Orissa E-mail: ranjanmallik_artist@yahoo.C. the leader among contemporary masters. My subjects are socio-living relations. National Award Chandrabhaga Orissa. U. There is a selection of figurative shapes and colour tones rendered in surrealistic styles with different mediums and brushstrokes for my painting. the animal is a symbol of my thought process. Bhubaneswar. 38 group shows. 2006 • National Award .com www.com Mobile: 991195016.Ranjan Kumar Mallik Born: 3 May 1976. A nature lover par excellence. Agra. Memorial Award. College of Art & Craft Annual Award.com ranjanmallikartist@gmail. M. Agra.
Within & beyond Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 97 .
The lifestyle that people were living seemed unnatural to me. rollers. I give ready a constructive shape to the idea according to my aesthetics. What would you describe as your best show? This is not on animals at all. It is then up to the viewer to make his own judgement. are waiting out their time and longing for the end to come. The series was titled Within and Beyond and invited widespread commentary. It was an exhibition held in Balasore on the occasion of the fiftieth year of our independence. This gives a varied texture to the works. Gwalior. The style of depiction is surrealistic and the technique that I have adopted is not a smooth application of colours. It seems that animals forced to live away from their natural confines. I adopted the stance of a silent observer. As I travel around metro cities. my aim is to create a silent revolution in the mind of the viewer and thereby awaken a sense of civic responsibility. It was titled Freedom and depicted freedom through colours. such as landscapes and flags. I am attracted to the cries of tortured animals and am moved by the sight of pain in their eyes. I show people who are urban in their makeover…the Page 3 figure. When did this stark fact about animals in urban settings strike you as cruelty? This realisation came to me when I moved to Delhi in 2000. Instead. using a sponge. It was not a complaining stance but one of deep curiosity. and thinks. This exhibition is also important to me because I made the first sale of a painting on that occasion. This made a deep inquisitive and thought Pratibhashree honour. That does not mean that I pander to their desires. MP 98 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . and through forms related to independence. Life here was such a contrast to the lifestyle of my home town. How did you react to this situation in your art? I did not want to take on the role of a complainant. Have you found acceptance of your art in galleries? I have had a very successful showing of my works at the Reflection Art Gallery. What other form of the plastic arts interests you? I am also interested in photo graphy and the making of short films. It is my policy to paint keeping the public in mind. things that bring on a reaction. It was titled Dulha Bikaavu Nahi Hai. the two should We not be linked. I felt I was an animal myself trapped within this urban jungle. I try to take a shot of that moment through the lens. It was done in the context of public art in Agra. manual fingers and impasto. Narrate an exhibition that stands out in your mind. Marriage is a relationship and not a commercial trans action and as such.provoking angle enter my paintings. it is this practice that is behind the cycle of suffering in our lives. Kalabhushan National award. the body builder. etc. Orissa. It showed the manner in which prospective grooms are measured up in terms of their material standing. Of course. there is a human figure on the canvas. I began to put myself in the animal’s shoes and wondered why human beings wanted to dominate the situation. There was show manship and a muddle and chaos all round. My message through my art is that there should be a stop to this marketing of men as commodities. It is a technique done as a spray. the couple. I paint saying that I am not the right person to adjudge the work. At times I even resort to smudging parts of the canvas. In the domain of film-making I have made a documentary on Fakir Mohan Senapati. a patriot and freedom fighter from Orissa. How is the human-animal relationship depicted in a work? In my current works.
Stockholm is the best in the 20 city list. the PM’s residence to the Safdarjung Airport to enable the VVIPs to take helicopters to the IG Airport. Metro ride from Qutub Minar to Huda City Centre will change your mindset. they now need to the helipad at Safdarjung. As the train zooms into Gurgaon. it seems is a big hazard for health. One bit of consolation is that Delhi had the most people admitting that there has been a major improvement on the traffic scene in recent years. the distant Aravallis. vehicles will flow smoothly. But how does Delhi compare with the other international cities? The best traffic is in the Scandinavian countries. Although these personages do not drive all the way to the international airport... this will cover a large part of the capital. although there are impressive glass facaded buildings and the massive malls.. hopefully our Metro will do the same too. driving on the city roads. is always getting more than its share of criticism. Little doubt. Soon.. The most recent says. which also reduces security risks to the VVIPs. Delhi is the fifth “most painful city for drivers. the visual feast is good only in the Delhi section which begins with a marvellous sight of the hoary Qutub Minar. New York is better than London which appears in the middle of the list. and this causes traffic stoppages on arterial roads. The most fabulous lush greenery will meet their astonished gaze as the train fleet through lush foliage. tiled farmhouse roofs.it is a 27. it is only the concrete jungle which awaits one. 100 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . According to a recently completed 2010 Commuter Pain Survey compiled by IBM. This warning is because soon parking fees will jump to dizzy heights in many upmarket city zones.” The survey recorded the economic and emotional toll on the drivers in 20 major cities all around the world.Delhi - Clean Delhi “plastered on every conceivable space with a rueful feeling that it is all big hype? Well. Safdarjung Rd or Auroubindo Marg thanks to VIP cavalcades going to the airport? This irritating feature could soon be a thing of the past as there are plans by the Delhi Metro Rail Corporation to build an underground tunnel from 7 Race Course Rd. 62 per cent said their work and academic performance was negatively affected.and.. the city which is a scintillating mix of the modern and the ancient.minute train ride worth taking if only for the view! Admittedly. The London Tube built more than a century ago is standing the test of time. The stop and start traffic was the major stress creator. cynics should simply take a Metro ride from Qutub Minar to Huda City Centre to change their mindset. Delhi with an 81 per cent score ranked fifth.CAPITAL t it-Cha Ch A BETTER TRAFFIC SCENE Delhi. Delhi is the fifth “most painful city for drivers” in the world. A VISUAL FEAST How many times have you seen the ubiquitous slogan “Green. especially if you already own one vehicle and the second is only a luxury. thanks to the tunnel. Thanks to the Metro? TRAFFIC SNARL NO MORE Have you often been caught in a traffic snarl on Kemal Atartuk Rd. BUYING CAR. the Metro has changed not only the look of the capital but also the lifestyle of the people. THINK AGAIN If you are planning to buy a car. Beijing the worst. Nestling in between are the pink tops of the Chattarpur temples. Apparently 96 per cent of the city drivers claimed that their health was affected by the driving. think again. indeed. verdant farmhouses and scenic beauty which will put them in mind of the hills! It is not just greenery.
everyone is jittery. Indians are quite ingenious in cooking up ways and means of escaping the paying of taxes.. and also to the additional congestion charge which will be levied in crowded areas like Connaught Place! Shopping in major markets will not be such a pleasurable experience anymore. Event Knowledge Services and others to conduct many aspects of an international event. is planning to impart driving lessons to a 100 women from all walks of life at a training centre on a three-acre plot near the Tis Hazari ice factory in North Delhi. Another order is that a person who intends to buy a vehicle will have to show proof that he/she has adequate parking space within his premises. thanks to the Commonwealth Games and the 30.000 volunteers will be trained for the commonwealth games. Delhi Government. for the simpler reason of the at least 25 lakh properties. Zone C and E will charge Rs 20 and F to H will charge Rs 10. According to the authorities. Curiouser and curiouser schemes get thought up by Delhi’s administrators. The training sessions. NSS. Rs 75 for the next two and Rs 50 per hour thereafter. emergency situations. the amount 102 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . Probably not. SAI and from the general public including retired bureaucrats. The purpose underlying this move is primarily to discourage people from using private vehicles. accommodation affairs. But with grave misgivings about their safety. parking in category B localities will be Rs 3o. To keep these female cabbies safe. women along side. dogs will be trained to protect the fair ladies! Yes. Sounds complicated? Delhiites will soon get used to this. Here’s wishing the plan all success. so good. and which family worth its salt will settle for owning less than three cars at least when they reach a certain social status? should be Rs 2500 crore. etc.etc. there is a high level of dedication and a general keen willingness to spend time doing something for Delhi among these volunteers who have come from different places.Car owners will have to pay astronomical parking fees. colonies which come under category A will charge Rs 50 for the first two hours. Ideally. And the MCD too is not amused. So far.but this is not so. and senior citizens.There will also be lessons on body language and sports terminology. are “not only geared to disseminate information but also to turn this disparate group of people into a team. will be taught by Amity University. the RWAs and market associations will be roped in to collect the tax from their members and submit it to the MCD. only about 10 lakh of them have taxes paid! This is a shame. A private company will be involved on a buildoperate. Slum dwellers of the area can also avail of the training as it will be a means of living for them.. In the coming three months.000 volunteers who have started training for the job. according to a news report. HOW MUCH MCD COLLECTS How much do you think the MCD collects in the form of property tax? A mere thousand odd crore at the most. DOGS TO GUARD LADY CAB DRIVERS There’s no doubt about it. these people drawn from delhi University. German shepherds will be trained and familiarised to the Trained dogs will protect lady cab drivers. If this situation has to be remedied. surely? This is all because the MCD has worked out a new parking policy. homemakers. The well-heeled will think it infra dig to travel by the Metro. says a report. DELHI TO BE SHOWCASED Delhi will be showcased to the world like nobody’s. – Bharati. One wonders whether the Metro and now these stringent parking rules will deter Delhiites from buying new vehicles.” With the countdown starting for the beginning of the Games. 30.. drastic steps need to be taken. Also.parking fees will be linked to the locality’s house tax! Briefly put. Recently. For the same time periods. a proposal for approval has been okayed for the MCD to train about a 100 women as cab drivers. the MCD.transfer basis to hire the trainers and build the centre. press operations. and has decided to take the assistance of a special Delhi government tax force to identify the defaulters and bring them to book.. Fair enough. according to a trainer. Rs 50 and Rs 10.security matters. The Delhi CM has even asked her ministers to step in and supervise Games projects so that all glitches are removed. Ministry of Tourism. parking along foot paths.
good food and coffee or any other drink and time will just pass leaving you with fond memories of Mocha. You can select from routine restaurant table chair to a laid-back. Considering Fry is a brand from South Africa and they are currently hosting the FIFA it was interesting that Delhi still likes to see a famous cricketer. Every outlet of Mocha has something unique to offer. though the real white sausage was expected the next day only. as a consumer you also get celebrity endorsed items and the day Yuvraj was in the shop. Then there were the German ones. The hostess admitted that she bought them only because she was able to taste how fresh they were. – Sona Sharma. I visited and found that they were at this time doing a promotion for sausages. great value for money. There is a wide range of tea options as well and then the hot chocolates which are so different and amazingly rich in texture and flavour. lounge-style diwan and above all a Gujarati-style ‘jhoola’. MOCHA COFFEE NEW OUTLET If you want to have a good coffee these days there is so much to choose from that making a selection can be tiring. if just tasting before buying is not your thing. So. And often these are Yuvraj Singh launching Fry range of biscuits. Their tagline says – Mocha Coffees and Conversations – and yes it is a great place to have long conversations with friends. At Mocha in Greater Kailash I Market. next to each other as well but when a coffee outlet is one like the chain Mocha – the decision is easy because apart from the amazing quality and variety of coffees available there is so much food to choose from. The healthier options in the fresh fruit juices and smoothies including Fruit from the Tropics and Bahut Berry are delightful. Earlier some shops showcased their cheeses but to have cooked material for trial before buying the raw material of the same quality is indeed a good move on the part of these outlets. These products are made of soya and wheat but also have vegetarian products that mimic the non-vegetarian. And now they have managed to get the famous cricketer Yuvraj Singh to launch the Fry range of products. 104 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . aunts and grandmother. the place will provide privacy. At the official launch day-long event I eyed it because it was occupied by a family celebrating the birthday of a 7-yearold kid with his mother. Most outlets fall short on two things – the tables are so cramped together that it feels more like a canteen and less like a restaurant or a coffee outlet. the visitors and invitees got more than just the products they purchased. the spicy smaller sausages and the Italian version with cheese inside with the meat so when you fried them the cheese melted and gave a wonderful twist. So. food items and individuality.DELHI Events MORE FOOD TO TRY AND BUY At a dinner party recently I was impressed with a dish of prawns. they have not compromised at all. For the sausages there were some interesting offerings from around the world. To be able to taste what you are about to buy is always a privilege and supermarkets in Europe have been known to do it all the time. but if out in the market alone. The tasting before selling had been organised by Godrej Nature’s Basket. The moment they left I shifted! The decor is never overpowering and all Mocha outlets have common things like attentive staff.
Persia. cosmetic products. and the gem is associated with religious rites of the Navajos and other tribes. scimitars or the horses’ bridles. the turquoise was worn to ward off the influence of dark and evil powers. By Kusum Mehta A 106 ncient and yet always at the height of current fashion: that is turquoise for you. often set in a border of pearls. meaning simply “Turkish stone. The importance of turquoise to the American Indian continues to the present day.” They were used as talismans decorating daggers. will never be poor. the sky-blue gemstones were originally worn around the neck or on the hand to ward off unnatural death. In many cultures of the old and new worlds this gemstone has been well appreciated for thousands of years as a holy stone. Its brilliant sky-blue belongs to the all-time favourite trend colours in the world of fashion and jewellery. Tibet and the Aztecs and Incas of Central America. dust or even the ph-value of the skin. It is a virtual “people’s gemstone”. Persian philosopher Al Kazwini wrote. in order to protect the wearer from the “evil eye. In former times thought to protect riders Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 .” The turquoise was prized by many ancient cultures.G THE TURQUOISE A EMSTONE OF CURRENT FASHION An old precious stone that’s an integral part of today’s fashions. In the ancient Persian kingdom. it has been found that turquoises may in fact change their colour. but this reaction is not necessarily an indication of impending danger. The reason for the colour change is rather the influence of light. And from this period comes the name “turquoise”. there was an imminent danger for the wearer. including those of Egypt. In earlier times turquoises were sometimes thought to be responsible for the material wealth of their bearers. where in tombs from the period around 3000 BC were found artefacts set with turquoise. However. At all times in history. The stone was used as money by American Indians of the 16th century. in the meantime. The oldest proof of this lies in Egypt. If the stones changed their colour. a good-luck charm or talisman.” Turquoises were loved as ornaments decorating turbans. which may all trigger off chemical responses. The turquoise came to Europe only during the time of the crusades. “The hand wearing a turquoise and using it as a sealing stone. For example.
veins and seams deposited by groundwaters. The turquoise has been synthetically produced by Pierre-Gilson of Paris. Most mining is done by hand. The oldest turquoise mines known are in the Sinai Desert at a place called Maghara Wadi. American turquoise. depending on the quality of turquoise they contain and the intricacy of the workmanship. rather than standardised ovals and other geometric shapes. Native turquoise occurs primarily as crusts. is routinely cut to standard shapes. Yellowish-green material may sell for a few pennies per carat. Persian turquoise is dense and non-porous. Sometimes the matrix is in the form of an intricate lace like pattern. flight staff and other professions who need special assistance to ward off accidents. with its deep blue shades. We . American turquoise is found in all shades of blue and green. This is among the finest turquoise and is characterised by a uniform and intense pale blue or medium blue colour. BEST QUALITY. This source supplied a large portion of the turquoise imported by Europe and Asia for centuries and turquoise was a major Iranian export before World War I. It resembles the very finest Persian turquoise but is priced much lower. It is always opaque and is therefore cut into beads and cabochons that sometimes take a high polish and have a glassy appearance. The variety of rings. Of special interest and popularity are the ornate necklaces called “squashblossom” that can weigh several pounds and may cost thousands of dollars. So-called Egyptian turquoise is yellowish-green or greenish-blue. Minor amounts of turquoise are found in China. 108 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 tens of dollars per carat. The best quality the turquoise is uniform in colour. Australia. There are several basic grades of turquoise. Such stones may sell for and horses from accidental falls. bracelets. pendants and earrings produced is enormous.UNIFORMITY IN COLOUR Today the United States is a major source of turquoise. known as spider web. Just below this in value is fine quality spiderweb. The mineral is a hydrous copper aluminium phosphate. on the other hand. Tibet. Nevada and California. as well as the presence or absence of green or brown tinge. Most of the mines are in Arizona and New Mexico. nodules. Some turquoise is carved into animal figures and other decorative shapes. Some of the world’s finest turquoise comes from northeastern Iran. deep blue and free of matrix. while greenish-blue stones are of lesser quality. Chile and Afghanistan. wearing the turquoise is recommended to solve the problems caused by a negative outlook on life. The turquoise is somewhat soft – 6 on the Mohs scale – but is compact and wears well. Small chips are extensively used by Indian workers and silversmiths for inlay purposes and Indian jewellery with turquoise set in silver has become very popular. the rich blue colours are ascribed to copper. Persian turquoise. In the contemporary teachings of the healing power of stones. Turquoise beads are usually baroque shapes or tumble – polished nuggets. while the presence of iron introduces a greenish cast. uniform in colour and takes a high polish. because turquoise is usually deposited on the surface and only shallow pits or trenches are needed. usually with some matrix present. is well qualified for this kind of work. Dark-blue turquoise is considered the most desirable. Mexico. Turquoise value decreases with increasing amounts of matrix. This synthetic stone is dense. The bright and happy colour is supposed to lend self-confidence to subdued personalities and it is also very popular as a token of friendship. The turquoise matrix is a material in which blue or green gem material is mixed with portions of brownish or grey rock. because light-coloured Persian turquoise loses effectiveness when set in brightly polished silver. Mining is simple. Most Indian craftsmen prefer to cut baroque or free from cabochons. In all cases valuation is based on overall appearance and depth of colour. since the turquoise is reputed to be responsible for faithfulness and reliable friendships. Uniformity of colour implies the absence of offcolour patches or spots. so it takes a high polish. they are nowadays considered the ideal goodluck stones for aviators. with some production from Colorado.
So how do you go about playing the ultimate seductress? Here are few tips: Getting your assets into shape: You may have an hourglass figure but if you have been wearing ill-fitted bras. Victoria’s Secret. Bravissimo etc are prestigious brands in this field while in India the lingerie business is still in its infancy. you pout out. Awareness is definitely spreading among the strata of urban women but the demand for high-end lingerie is nowhere near that in the Western countries. You wonder where you went wrong. chances are high that your breasts have gone out of shape or have started sagging. only to find disappointment writ large on his face which he tries his best to conceal. you quiz. You buy a sheer negligee in lavender blue.lingerie Seduce your man. the answer lies underneath: your lingerie. Wedding preparations are on in full swing. In Western countries the lingerie market is huge. I am not wasting my money on such trivialities. spending on lingerie appears to most as a ‘wasted expenditure’. Your first step . So are your preparations to have a really memorable first night. What about the underwear? What about it. You want to gift your hubby the ideal present: You. In a family set up Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 where each and every penny matters. You buy a baby pink bedspread and heart-shaped pillows and arrange for rose petals to be strewn all over the bed. The main reason perhaps is that most women are put off by the exorbitant prices. By Smita Shenoy THE BEST WAY IS TO GET THE PERFECT P 110 icture this: you are getting married in a couple of months’ time. You put on your old set under the transparent negligee and set out to seduce your man. Well. But nothing can be farther from the truth because the perfectly-fitting undies not only entice your man they also give your breasts perfect shape and support.
Do not retain them in a fit of sentiments. dispel your awkwardness. almost no lingerie shop will allow you to have a trial or exchange undergarments later. For reasons of personal hygiene. Follow your trainer’s advice very closely. new you. lilacs. You are spending good money on the purchase and you definitely want your money’s worth. Choose the right lingerie and let the romance We linger forever. After all. So you need to make sure at the onset that your cup size has been perfectly measured. The right type of diet will ensure lightness and suppleness of the body apart from improving your general health. Out with the old: Now that you have chosen the apt undergarments throw out your old ones out for good. Underwear is one of them. there are certain things which are best not bought online. Enrol for a short stint at your neighbourhood gym or yoga centre. Get your measurements taken correctly and then choose the size. Personal shopping trips: Although the world is just a mouse click away. The right fit: Poorly fitted bras and extra-tight panties are not only unattractive. At least the first time a personal visit is warranted. Take help: Once in the shop. But if your D-Day falls in the middle of May then satin lingerie may turn out to be a curse. 111 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . That works out fine if you are getting married in a cold country or the wedding is in the winter months. The right material: All women dream of having that elusive satin underwear bordered with wispy lace in their boudoir. But just because he likes rouge and noir does not mean that you have to fill up your wardrobe with the two colours. armed with these handy tips. Get ready to enchant your hubby. Pastel colours. Same is the reasoning with panties as well. they also threaten to cut off the blood circulation to the vital areas. Again. Most fitness centres have their in-house dietician. One or two trips with her should also make you a pro at underwear shopping. So become a lady in red or a black beauty and indulge your man’s fancy for the night. The right diet: Along with exercise diet will play an important role. You will only ruin your hard-earned figure. Choose light. the same logic applies with respect to buying panties as well. airy fabric with comfortable elastic bands. Consult her and ask for an appropriate diet plan.would be to get them in shape. obviously. first nights do not come along often. You have to cast aside your inhibitions. of course after ensuring that they have lady instructors (you would. do they? Friendly shoulder: If you really are getting cold feet and sweaty palms at the thought of lingerie shopping then take along a gal pal who has done that. Choosing the right lingerie: Now that you are well on your way to acquiring the perfect mounds it is time to go shopping for the befitting lingerie. Keeping your private parts clean and strictly following the washing instructions on your newlypurchased lingerie are the mantras to a great looking. stride confidently to the lingerie section and ask for the shop assistant’s help in choosing the right material. The right colour: A recent poll by a men’s website showed that 90 per cent men get turned on by red or black lingerie. Personal hygiene: In the area of underclothing the importance of personal hygiene cannot be overstressed. with red having a slight edge. So you can still choose saucy underwear with lace edges but in cotton: sexy yet practical. not be comfortable discussing your doubts on this subject with a male trainer). In all probability most lingerie companies in India will make the undergarments keeping the humid Indian climate in mind. on your first night you would not want to literally swoon in your beloved’s arms. magenta all work wonders. powder puff blues. Observe her and learn how she holds herself and commands the attention of the shop helpers. You certainly would not want to feel clumsy and uncomfortable on your most romantic day. Keep a stock in an array of colours and keep him guessing every night. Obviously. Browse through the store’s catalogue and study the materials listed.
I had never tried to make my work very realistic.Bhartiya Chitrakala Mein Khanijon Ki Bhumika from C. Group Show Group Exhibition in Atelier .Topic . instead I believe in showing the expressions through lines only. Workshop Reflections of Vastu in painting that improve the lifestyle in Interior Designing.com 112 A postgraduate in drawing from Kanpur University and PhD holder on Bharatiya Chitroon Mein Khanijon Ki Bhoomika. Krishna is her favourite subject. Sahpurjat. Mob: 9289500841.S. Biplab Biswas. on Drawing & Painting . She does not believe in decorating or giving detailing to her work. 2009. London and Australia. Her works seem to communicate messages through their visual language. Hauz Khas. Phool Bagh in the year 1998 on Oil and Water colour medium.An artist who craves for praise from the common man.com www. She also likes to depict strong personality of woman. but I should say art is in my blood. He himself is a poet and that is how I can say that artistic knack is in my genes. 2009. I like to paint.J. University. I am really thankful to him who guides me on important aspects of Fine Arts from which my paintings has improved. Group Exhibition in Chikutasi Kala Mela.La Cafe. it was not easy for me to establish myself in terms of financial aspect. Excerpts from an interview: Why are you an artist? I don’t know why I’m an artist. Do you think that being a full-time freelance artist is a tough task and one has to work hard to survive? I am lucky that I had my father’s support but after coming to Delhi. By ‘Vatsal’ SIMPLICITY Shikha Agnihotri Born: 22-Feb-1981 (Kanpur) Education: PhD. Kanpur in the year 2001 & 2007. so I am an artist. Solo Shows Solo Exhibition in Press Club of India. Collections Many Collection in art galleries in India as well as in USA. There was an array of styles which are capable of displaying emotions and sensibility. Solo Exhibition in Lalit Kala Academy. 9289044197 Email: artist. Delhi. Kanpur in the year 2003 & 2005. Fact is that this financial issue often hampers July (Second) 2010 . Delhi. Tell us something about your style of work? It is semi-realistic from the beginning. I feel the detailing or overdoing mars the essence of the thoughts and depiction.shikha@gmail. Awards Solo Exhibition in Chikutasi Kala Mela. on Acrylic on canvas.M. Lucknow in the year 2008. What have been major influences in your life and art? If I had to think of one person who influenced my life tremendously. Phool Bagh in the year 1998. Solo Exhibition in Chikutasi Kala Mela.blogspot. her positive aspects and power. And one more person. and her series is based on his romantic emotions which is a very different form.artistshikha. even that simplistic and minimalistic work attracts the viewers. Solo Exhibition in Kala Mela. The paintings exuded an innocent charm through their depictions. Kanpur in the year 2003 & 2005 on Oil and Water colour medium. it would have to be my father who helped inculcate in me Woman’s Era ● ALLURING this interest at an early age. Group Exhibition in Lokayata Art Gallery. Kanpur. Solo Exhibition in Kala Mela. on Acrylic on canvas. Delhi in April. Shikha’s father played a great role in moulding her daughter’s career as an artist. 2010.
Art market is also very affirmative. Outside India people have started taking interest in our art as they sense that it has a feel of spirituality. Woman’s Era ● How big is the international market for Indian art today? Indian art is getting acclamation because of our senior artists in the international market. Especially in Dubai. In my view Indian art 113 July (Second) 2010 . These days’ people are drawn towards the art and parents are also encouraging their teenagers to join this field. Opening of the art galleries are in a way good to explore the new avenues. especially for the young artists. And it emerges from the heart and soul. What is your opinion regarding the current artists and trend in the art market? I also belong to the category of current artists and for me everything is very positive and encouraging.Sanyasi the creative part of an artist. Working as a freelance artist is no doubt a tough task and requires lot of patience. I think the future of the new generation is very bright in every field and they can prosper if they have an inclination and positive attitude. you will find that Indian art market is growing immensely. The question of livelihood is very big and if you don’t have any solid background or financial security then sometimes artist has to compromise with his/her work. That is why the concept of Indian art is attracting them.
I believe in God and he thinks positively for me. but I consider as it a great prize even when the most humbles person of the world We praises my artwork. Which class purchases paintings? These days the attitude towards the art work has totally changed. Take your own time and space. Indeed that’s what I work for. For an ordinary viewer your paintings of Krishna are not easy to recognise as a basic human form. Do you think you have evolved with the time? I am improving myself everyday. Do they understand? What is the response you receive? My paintings are not too abstract. Any suggestions for the artists of your generation? Artists should not yield to pressure from galleries and keep pursuing their work aggressively. it is selling at pretty high prices as well. In my view right people get right opportunities. Selling and buying art is becoming more and more commercial because people consider this an investment that gives you high returns. Indian art industry is booming and it surely has a lot to offer to art connoisseurs and art industry enthusiasts all across the globe.would capture the international market very soon as it is connected with the soul. and just paint. Tell us what role recognition and awards have on your career? Recognition and awards are surely one of the crucial moments for any artist. Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . What sort of Indian art sells more? Modern contemporary art has a huge market and online selling has become very popular nowadays. Indian art is not only selling like hot cake. Do you like experimenting? If an artist experiments it opens varied horizons for him/her and thus the best of the work comes out. What is the aim of your life? To become a recognised artist and spread happiness and awareness through my paintings. then it will thwart your creativity and individuality. the spending power and indulgence amongst the masses of the country has greatly increased due to which people do not mind investing in art.that is his sanyas aspect. Are you also planning to switch off to abstract style? There is no doubt that these days abstract art is in demand. These daysʼ artists are opting for abstract style. Moreover. You keep on learning if 114 you have dedication and eagerness to learn. difference is that the upper class purchases it for the purpose of investment and for middle class it has become the essential part like any other household item. but I can’t work on it unless I have a complete knowledge of it. so it is not very difficult for viewers to understand them or to grasp the Bhav imbibed in them. What is the best time to work on canvas for you? Early morning. It is an endless journey. If you surrender to such pressure and sell your work before it is done. What is the USP of your work? I use bold strokes and flat colours and only after that give texture to create a touch of uniqueness. Presently I am thinking to depict something on a different aspect of Krishna.
as it will be harsh on your hands. Strawberries are a rich food – both in terms of money and food value – so we cannot afford to waste them. we need clinically clean bottles and jars to store the same. stirring all the while as it thickens. Lemon juice can be used as an antiseptic. E-3. what more can be done with them? It can be easily said that ‘a lemon a day keeps the doctor away’. it has a distinct smell and is available in different grades. and such an attractive one that it is very difficult to resist them. The only oil that can compete with olive oil is mustard oil. regular intake of fresh lemons may also be useful in treating cases of kidney stones. Stir and all the skin and foam will disappear. whole pulses and vegetables? Normally we add salt and turmeric at the beginning of cooking vegetables or dal etc. pepper and the lemon juice. helps to dissolve gall stones in combination with olive oil. But sometimes jars containing pickles and preserves continue to carry their odour even after being washed. truly. chill well. Wash the berries and pat dry. cut into 16 cubes before storing in a plastic bag in the freezer. Please tell us how we can store them properly. but remember to rub it with a paper or cloth. But not to worry. What should we do to have the luxury of ‘instant white sauce’? For the instant white sauce. Please tell me a simple way to clean up after an ‘oil-spill’ in the kitchen. Add salt to whole pulses like kabuli chana and rajma after boiling. strawberries are a rich fruit. drop one cube into one cup milk and heat slowly.com to lodge your queries. Rani Jhansi Marg New Delhi-110 055 Click womansera. Apart from making pickle and juice. For vegetables which reduce in volume after cooking. . corn. Add the salt early while preparing soups and stews. Wash with soap and water after some time. What should we do? This problem. It helps in increasing good cholesterol in the body and it is much cheaper than olive oil. blend together one cup soft butter and one cup flour. meats. It is important to store them in the right way so they keep fresh for a long time. For medium thick sauce. Cook the vegetables in salted water. Jhandewala Estate. For meats. You can also use soda bicarbonate instead of the wheat flour. Every now and then we have to face this problem. or do we have an option? Olive oil is good for our health. but it is good to keep in mind the time to add salt in some particular food items. Light a matchstick and while it is still lit. has a solution that is quite simple. Place in a plastic bag in intervening layers of fruit and sugar. Spread in an ice cube tray. Fasten the bag firmly and put it in the freezer compartment of the refrigerator. however large it may seem. sprinkle just before removing from the stove. – Savita Bhargava.Q & A Now that the pickle making season is here. Then wipe with a cloth. How can we prevent formation of skin on sauces and jellies? Spread a thin layer of melted butter or cream over jellies. Q If you have any problem in cooking or kitchen. just sprinkle a little wheat flour on the surface and rub it with your fingers. then add salt. Cook the corn first. But it is very expensive and also not suitable for all kinds of food preparations. drop it into the jar and close the lid tightly. What is the right time to add salt to the following: soups and stews. as a pain reliever. it will be a good idea to add salt after they are cooked and prevent oversalting. Kitchen Queries QQ Q Q We have plenty of lemons in our garden. write to Woman’s Era. We shall try to help you sort it out. for apart from making delicious summer drinks it is also useful for therapeutic and beauty purposes. puddings and other sauces right after cooking. Address your queries to: WOMAN'S ERA. Should we use olive oil in our cooking as is the trend these days. Yes.
Shouting never resolved A fight or an issue. – C. Our foe triumphs. Conquer the situation By keeping your cool. But then it does More damage to us Than to the person intended. Speak with authority And uprightness. Secunderabad 132 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 . Only angry words echo That throws us into turmoil Carefully preserved emotions Become public To embarrass us later. Radhika. It shows we are at fault For the simple reason That we had shouted.WHY SHOUT? When we shout To prove our point. Our frustrations. And that will Make our opponent humble. Sometimes. By breathing deep Until our mind is clear. Yet when we scream. we can’t But help shouting To release our anger. And our credibility crumbles. Maybe we have Been wronged And blamed For no fault of ours. Win an argument Or intimidate our rival.
but that would provide long-term benefits in one's condition. there is some good news. retired people with time on their hands and little or no means of venting their energies are left with no alternative but the “tube”. This does not necessarily make them unhappy. Robinson said the worsening economy could boost TV viewing. published in the December issue of Social Indicators Research. the desire was not fulfilled. on the other hand. reading and socialising correlated with the highest levels of overall lasting happiness. Unhappily married couples also watch more TV.000 participants and found that watching TV might make you feel good in the short term but this feeling is definitely shortlived. TV does cause people to be less happy. "Television viewing is a pleasurable enough activity with no lasting benefit and it pushes aside time spent in other activities – ones that might be less immediately pleasurable. In the former case. on the other hand. yes. Nathan ? he religion section of dailies in India reported on a discourse on the Bhagavad Gita in the cities. as with any other seemingly pleasurable activity. Watching TV. moderation is indeed a prescription while striving for the goal of “living happily after!” We 133 ." THE STUDY The study. There seems to be a definite correlation between TV watching hours and happiness. there would be a lot of frustration." In India." Robinson says. Given this assessment it appears that the human being is not destined to be ‘happy’." the study says. Researchers found that activities such as sex. viewing hours increase. People most vulnerable to addiction tend to be socially or personally disadvantaged. "Through good and bad economic times. for most couples.WATCHING MORE TV You may not be as happy as the idiot box makes you feel." Yet there may be good news here for broadcasters. with TV becoming an opiate. especially since. co-author John P. the consequent ‘happiness’ or satisfaction would be fleeting. ARE YOU T By M. "Happily married couples read newspapers and magazines on more days. In other words. The desires could either be fulfilled or not." The study concludes that. was the only activity that had a direct correlation with unhappiness. Happiness is relative and. analysed data from thousands of people who recorded their daily activities in diaries over the course of several decades. "While those not happy with their marriages watch more TV. "As people have progressively more time on their hands. since addictive activities produce momentary pleasure but long-term misery and regret. An extensive new research study has found that unhappy people watch more TV while those who consider themselves happy spend more time reading and socialising! The University of Maryland analysed 34 years of data collected from more than 45. with 'not happy' people estimating over 30 per cent more TV hours per day than 'very happy' people. "These points have parallels with addiction." reports the Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 study. our diary studies have consistently found that work is the major activity correlate of higher TV viewing hours. "The pattern for daily TV use is particularly dramatic. However. The verdict then would seem to be that. If. this is the only companionable time spent. This also seems to agree with what the ‘dis- courses’ talk about. the pieces stated how futile they were. Talking about the desires that arise in the mind. some people have reported being happier than others. Commenting on the study.
Name Address City Pin Tear along the dotted line and mail to Crossword No. A red powder or cream used as a cosmetic for colouring the cheeks or lips (5) 20. Chemical symbol for the element Sodium (2) 21. Not moving (5) 8. The nickname for a gold statuette given as an Academy award (5) 7. Discover or investigate (a crime or its perpetrators) (6) 24. The organ of hearing and balance in humans and other vertebrates (3) 18. 4 Womanʼs Era. Employee Stock Ownership Plan (4) 1. A mysterious or puzzling person or thing (6) 11. Shake involuntarily. An amount above or below a given level (6) 12. A stretch of land. A person employed by a touring band of musicians to set up and maintain equipment (6) 3. Delhi Press. Reduce to small particles or powder by crushing (5) 17. Cut a groove in (a surface) (4) 23. On the top of (4) Please accept my entry for the crossword competition.O T O ✂ R O 7 5 6 C M M 8 9 N I L 14 10 11 13 12 S A 15 R 18 16 17 E 22 O 19 20 21 E N 23 T Across E 24 P 134 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 ✂ 1. Be extremely and uncritically fond of (4) 19. Lasting or existing forever (7) 14. excitement. Bring about (a feeling or response) in someone (6) 4. Loud and harsh (8) 15. New Delhi-110 055. or frailty (7) 2. Perfect happiness. A framework of spaced bars that are parallel to or cross each other (4) 16. 4 w Cross r d CONTEST 1 2 3 N 4 Down . especially with regard to its physical features (7) 5. typically as a result of anxiety. I subscribe to all the rules and regulations of the competition. Be filled with love or admiration for (7) 9. A person’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance (3) 15. A deer with large branching antlers. Chemical symbol for the element Calcium (2) 6. great joy (5) 13. Of very high quality (4) 22. native to the northern tundra and subarctic (8) 10.
. Tooth. Entries must be sent so as to reach Womanʼs Era by 15 August 2010. No correspondence in this matter will be entertained. Entity. the prize amount will be divided among the first 10 competitors chosen by lot. In case there are more than one sender of an all-correct solution. sekhar. 15. Academy. Slang. 10.WIN UP TO Winners of Crossword . The contest is not open to the employees of Delhi Press. Bid. Allahabad. Nope. Kochi. Troll. Answers to Crossword-1 Across: 1. Ahmedabad Priya Prabhu . 23. Love. Dr Silonie. 3. The decision of the management will be final and binding. 5. C 17. 14 12. bai. Moan. Movie. 6. on. New D Sita Rani. 19. Nisha. 16. Eel. Ja Gaman Sahn i.000 will be given to the person sending an all-correct solution.1 Rs10. 13. Gohil. 20. Adolescence. Photocopies will not be accepted. Entries must be on the crossword printed here. 3. od. Mum Divya Chandra bed. enage. Crown. by ordinary post. Every entry should be accompanied by the sender’s family photo. 4. Ago. Eel. 9. Karnataka. Mor 11. Woman’s Era ● POWER July (Second) 2010 135 . your family picture may be printed in the oncoming issue.000 IN CASH PRIZES elhi. 2. 17. Agar. Loveleena Gup Rules and Regulations Aggarwal. Roh tak. 16. Ramp. Area. Please send a signed declaration that you have no objection to printing your family picture. Seduce. 18 20. ta. 8. 21. If you are declared a winner. PS WIN WIN WIN ON YOUR Madhu Smita Sahu. Krishan Gopal a. BC 22. Chandigarh. Te 7. Spec. lkat Ko WO RD A prize of Rs 10. Caress landhar. Hot Down: 1. . Woo. Kiran Shailesh .
The ‘A’ group believed in reaching the platform — or.STORY SHORT On Catching the Train How early should one go to catch one’s plane/train/bus/whatever? By R. Katju Kolkata at 3 p. there is enough time. The article basically classified passengers into two categories. If he is wrong. without a worry or crease on their foreheads. “Don’t worry.m. And check-in time was one hour before take-off. follow point 1. T he TV ad of Moov displayed these days and showing a gentleman missing his train by a solitary minute — his rushing to the platform whilst the last bogie whizzes past — reminded me of an essay in our XIIth English course way back in 1957. when at 11. The other group ‘B’ type — yours truly belongs to this group — starts fretting about their intended journey performing mental gymnastics from many hours earlier thereby reaching the take-off point any time from half an hour to two hours before. Management pandits strongly emphasise two key principles for a successful career — viz: 1.30 a.” he told me. Three decades ago my boss and I were in Shillong. Remembering this I kept quiet — but kept on fretting. the airport or bus stand — at literally the last moment. I looked pointedly at the watch and the indicator sank in immediately. So. “Khaana kab milega?” I was shocked.” My shirt wet with perspiration. I rushed to do the needful as if I were the passenger. Katju. he rose from the lunch table and said. Katju. he nonchalantly murmured. G. He had to catch the flight from Guwahati to .m. The boss is always right. 2. after concluding a group meeting. “Call the car. and the car journey from Shillong to Guwahati airport never took less than 21/2 hours. for that matter. Half an hour later.
proved futile and, as the whistle sounded, I Bidding him a safe and comfortable We spent a ran for the train. To my horror I found it journey, I gave him less than 50 per cent miserable moving in the opposite direction and my chance of catching the flight. However, his night on the friend Ramesh trying his best to wriggle out bravado seemed justified as friends told platform of it with our luggage. I was shocked but me that he reached the airport in time — in telling jokes, nevertheless helped him out. fact, was one of the last 3-4 passengers singing film Ever a man known for his cool he was who checked in before the window’s songs and red in the face shouting obscenities. closure. I mentally took my hat off. smiting our “You... you, searching for worthless locks. Another lady — also belonging to the limbs and Our train is the next one and it’s moving ‘A’ category — the MD of a Ratlam faces to ward away. You loaded me on the wrong train company, had the habit of informing the off the hordes and then went treasure hunting...” stationmaster in advance of her catching of mosquitoes Sheepishly, I admitted my mistake and the Mumbai Express and asking him to which had calmed him down. delay its departure in case she arrived late. smelled blood. To compound our misery the This she habitually did to the chagrin and stationmaster informed us that there were irritation of the SM. no trains till next morning and we would have to Dwelling on the subject of catching and missing fend for ourselves during the night — the station trains, yours truly with a close friend was touring the boasted of no waiting room. deep south of India about three decades ago. We spent a miserable night on the platform telling jokes, singing film songs and smiting our limbs and eciding to visit Rameswaram we arrived by faces to ward off the hordes of mosquitoes which bus at Mandapam station next to had smelled blood. Rameswaram. The bus stopped at the station To conclude, recently I had to catch the 12.15 gate and the train was standing about 20 metres p.m. train to Secunderabad. Giving due away. I asked Ramesh to buy the tickets and check its departure time while I started getting our luggage consideration to traffic jams on roads and the unloaded from the bus top. In the above act my trunk platform, vehicle punctures and accidents and other unknown delaying factors, I left home to reach the collided with the bus body and the number lock flew station at 11.35. I found that the train had been out. As the departure was 10 minutes away, I decided delayed by half an hour. What to do? Having a pen and some loose paper handy why not pen something to look for the lock — it had sentimental value, We about catching trains? Result — this article. though it cost only Rs 3 six years ago. The search
The World’s First PPD – Free Hair Colour in India
AMA Herbal has launched Vegetal Bio Colour – the first PPD free, Ammonia free hair colour. Vegetal has been widely accepted in the US and UAE and is now available in India. Even though most hair-colouring products are Ammonia free, PPD is the main allergen that causes burning sensation while using the colour. Vegetal is free from PPD and Ammonia. It is completely safe to use, and there is no fear of any skin and scalp allergies. It is the only hair colour which is recommended by dermatologists. Be sure, be beautiful with Vegetal. Woman’s Era
Blue Heaven Launches Xpression Range of Nail Paint
Blue Heaven Cosmetics launched Xpression range of Nail Paint in the market. Xpression range is available in unlimited shades. Company has presented Xpression range of Nail Paints keeping in mind the requirement of females' beauty and fashion. The quality of this product is such that shine is long-lasting and there are no cracks. There are a number of shades to match your nails as per your requirement or fashion trend. The company is making available 9 ml. pack of Xpression range of Nail Paints for Rs 49/- (M.R.P.) in the market nationwide. July (Second) 2010 137
for spelling mistakes, stamp duty amounting to Rs 100 and registration fees of Rs 100 would again have to be rendered. Are car loans, for women available at concessional rates? I am thinking of buying a new vehicle, after tapping a bank. Yes, there are some banks offering car loans at reduced rates for women. They charge 25 basis points less, compared to general loans. For example, banks would reduce interest rate from 9.25 per cent to 9 per cent, while extending loan. Processing fees is waived off, also. Prompt payment of car loan instalments is rewarded by slashing interest rate further. The bank may charge 50 basis points less. That is, interest rate is cut from 9.25 per cent to 8.75 per cent, for women. Do I have to write a new cheque, if mistake is committed in earlier one? Just a few days ago, the bank refused to accept a cheque, though I had crossed out error and signed, next to the spot. Yes, the new banking rules say that if there's a mistake, one can’t cancel the error, as before and put a verification signature. When spelling is wrong, amount is incorrect or name is incorrect, a new cheque has to be written. I suspect that adulterated petrol is being sold to me, at bunk. Can it be found whether the petrol is spurious? A petrol pump has to keep stock of filter paper, at all times. Ask for one filter paper, put a little petrol on it and watch. If petrol evaporates at once, the vendor is selling quality material. But, when petrol lingers, does not evaporate quickly and leaves a blot, you would know that it’s fake stuff, at once. Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 A group of three women, we are promoting folk art, in our region. I received money for folk art fund, sometime back. Would the amount be taxed? No. You would be glad to know that folk art fund is not at all taxed. I have got kundan jewellery, in my ornament box. An elderly relative had given it to me. What is this jewellery and how should the shine come back to the pieces? Kundan jewellery are medieval type ornaments, where gold foil is inserted between stones and also near mount. You can use suede cloth to make the kundan collection sparkle. Recently, I let out two rooms in my house, for rent. I am employed in an office. Which income tax form should be filled, by me? When rental income is derived, you have to submit form ITR – 2, for income tax. At a wedding in my family, I have to buy clothes for relatives, both on bride and groom’s side. How much discount would a wholesale outlet give? You should try to get 40 per cent discount, and nothing less. A wholesale cloth shop or mill showroom may give the rebate because of bulk buying. E-mail your queries to: firstname.lastname@example.org Meenakshi Subramaniam is a former IRS officer, answering all your money queries, right from income tax to supermarket shopping. Mail your queries to:
Q & A
Though studying in college, I want to start saving money, right now. Can a Public Provident Fund (PPF) account be opened by me? You would be thrilled to know that a PPF account can be opened easily. It does not matter whether you are in college still. However, a bank account is necessary. I have been asked to write a book and hope to get a fair sum as royalty. How much tax would have to be paid on royalty? Well, if you get Rs three lakhs as royalty, there’s still no need to pay income tax. But, if sum is more, tax would be charged. Can bank ask me to open a fixed deposit if I want a locker? The bank can't insist that a locker would be given only if a fixed deposit is opened. But, some banks may say that a fixed deposit, equivalent to three year’s locker rent, has to be opened. To my horror, I found mistakes in my new house deed. These relate to spellings, area and dimensions of the flat. I am afraid the errors might cause problems. Do suggest a way out. There’s no cause for alarm, at all. You must, at once get a rectification deed prepared. Nominal charges would have to be paid. For example,
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. – Vinod C. It clearly reveals the fact that census is a great demographic endeavour that must not be confused with social science field work. Dixit. The prize is awarded to: that informed A doctor ashrams and cancer. Womansera. – S. they adjusted they had aged today. Ahmedabad. Its therapeuti contains 32 evolved nor are talks about Power Extra be sold over there But Musli citizen. Delhi manpower the the ensus people. It makes e. 2010) was 146 . technology has opened numerous avenues for women. leaving other groups deprived of chance to progress. In the modern ’ of these hand. choose from can not live and can also in what career but they range of today’s morals.her through the just a decade century initially and supported 21st sportingly of selection the for Indian arduous process an Army captain lifestyle be she is Her can training. A niece of Her parents then words. The feeling Some of into middle a glorious were born make give women they are made world you and so exists. ns commonly most is the the governmethis job. dionil. treatment and babas he recent are a craze sweeping the drug for the . remain absent selfthis. of interact left from an all. jawans we were “Everywhe was something never – and us because women saluted her chance had the timely and relevant. It is nice that for the first time since independence the census will record caste-based census which would be in a transparent and effective way so as to capture valuable socio-economic information of our billions and we would be able to put to use such databases in driving our developmental priorities and policies. to be sure-shot Extra. despite Sidenafil find an tablet. In order to measure our current reservation system’s success. During Sidenafil s. an d drugs.co damage done drugs available in do not suffer whose letters@wo undo the and ‘Babas’ They and studies the herbal n. tion c carrying out a comprehensive like backache unique indentifica side effects the counter. It is also neither a them were and Tidafil too censuses. With globalisation. alternative someone suggestion work. 2010). girl was coming poor in the when the nt school her governme after taking on from her of the city girl Civil Lines two boys met the exams. the Now. may show cause hypertensi this fatal for In this regard in census educated youth for . Why buy sorrow and torture for the daughter by giving dowry to the demanding in-laws? – Harinder Kaur. people not reveal what ‘efficiency census manpower another mammoth do On the other number of data collection. dress. the home from her. way you work. and the victim in Baraut in a school on her way to class girl was boys abducted When the school. Their only in India Ayurvedic drugs ones. Jalandhar. exercise treatment hand and law on one cannot afford costly Being a mammoth Everytime. doing and the come home she was it something it.com Name: Mobile: E-mail: RLS YOUNG GIMALE FROM CLASSMATES PROTECTIN G of for parents A must-read r Rabb Khan By M Shamsu growing girls. had only because for doing new aking got choice-m to them there!re we went. Earlier women were confined to kitchen and bringing up children. they have develops. so many and headache doses range database Like Sidenafil. be clubbed mg/tablet. of all mg per Census and quicker be taken. herbal six months work DIPSAR. unreporte or enough that are to incidents and guardians for parents about their careful be extra . . Bangalore. It can also of soand medicines a number who are engaged unemployed y to meet available employ coma. In the present days the concept of working woman has changed. who has begun. The already as herbal on and even s made by the path. Their names sure This will of people. – Vijayalakshmi A.They such by and the needy countries. unmindful of the dangers of unwanted pregnan cies. an opportunit there are that are claimed Why not give them In the market and Unani medicines . requiring y this is win the trust these to for better Apparentl age drugs and who take together task will have . But the first line of defence should the girls themselves and it is they who should take all precautions and keep the wolves at bay. de for every UID code could from 5-20 ‘improve’ Otherwise the number/co and issuing done to tablet. A thorough probe into the character and reputation of the groom and his family will save them from falling into the trap of greedy dowry seekers. needs a large nt draws this man the other. Besides of ‘ashrams’ undertake a number appear regularly." a year old. tender age the scores of of two. counting. market not are also treated as While herbal tests in the western and not serving of Ayurveda.India all like ‘Titanic’. some equally large networking a swift population so to entire until. As the author of the article says it is expedient that girls have to be protected from their male classmates. It consumer. women one in the spend a up as posted to went to summed back have options parents recently they came which we work to make with her and e of the and are able makes month The importanc respect she This choices. Religion and caste have done no good for our country but only divided the people. relate to in these only choose to either around you entertain. find surprising thing is is made to mg of it per The no attempt that Sidenafil in every census. In young and vulnerable age they seek sexual satisfaction. number of in a study power from seen when. Boomija. drugs do it is too late of electronic opportunity to digitise consumed so that students however. secretly and normally of course. WOMAN'S ERA invites readers’ opinions and reactions on articles. have to the drain. Even Viagra is a prescriptio study or census being to cope up in a it difficult is more viagra counters that. very dazed. who in meanwhile c had 119 goes down ns contained teachers. ashrams should be allopathic Herbal medicines remedies are such companies and hence is to Action of in the foreign g fake drugs sole purpose are but also called traditional have to akin to propagatin the law. and then get to and make the choices they adulthood age. The best letter will be given a prize of Rs 500. According her rs. ethics and education based on cultural values which will bring nobility in the child. women earlier were taking up job just as breadwinner or to support their family. Students. Address your letters by E-mail to: firstname.lastname@example.org or by post to: AS YOU SAY E-3 Jhandewala Estate. to maintainin found the sold as Ayurvedic believes nt are used (DIPSAR) n. Young girls are today more vulnerable than ever and the predators are no longer criminals who lurk in every society but their classmates as well. as wide a accept can. people spend lavishly willingly or under pressure on the engagement and marriage of their daughters as they believe that giving cash and expensive gifts will make their daughter’s in-laws happy and their daughter will remain always happy after her marriage. out whether reported examples. Otherwise. Now Kashmir Valley. caution drug but a long-drawn old pattern is followed some teachers. results. quality make money the image name of tarnishing sells in mockery of undergo stringent people. have become common place today and there are more and more girls ready to shed their inhibitions and willing to play along with their classmates. into no longer in the of freedom and with a sense of see that joyfully free the most important You can women and the people For many. from Baghpat daughters girl incident is The first a Class IX by UP. m We may pave mansera. Today’s work or eat. They take up lucrative jobs to maintain their status. s ellising today’ s for chann hari The hard option By Kasturi Rangac freedoms. Doctors . India is home to awe-inspiring number of sub-castes with nomenclature variations across regions. d mainly because world the have seen d acquiesce . By then smart system census is provides adulterate n way for some in future whenever by these complicatio the market. All that RIGHT CAREER OICE FOR A BLESSING FOR MODERN WOMEN I in our country. the 16three of in newspape on 26 to reports abducted of her victim was year-old three boys 2010 by place. who are on the threshold of old age are burdened with the additional responsibility of bringing up their grandchildren. exercise. Girl are not willing to commit to marriage and they prefer live-in relationships. The took her to an isolated raped the way and where they the ground area of A PERMISSIVE SOCIETY The article Prote cting Young Girls from their Male Classmates (June I. in century is joining the Army. the current method will result in progress of a specific group. Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2010 This is in response to your editorial Census 2011 (May II). once unheard of. ‘K2’. of the not only well as everything 2011 gullible violation as with the lives in India CENSUS lives of poor risk on playing This is sheer it at putting the medicines. these formulation sed pupils. but they The 21st old. So to change the scenario the best thing would be for schools to focus on moral. But today’s fact. So has seen T THE DOWRY MENACE This refers to the article Different dimensions of dowry menace. as they do what suffers many formulatio for erectile dysfunctio available in the trained to this exercise easily found But in all Unani medicines preparations to one five were registers. taking nitrate-ba drugs. short stories and features published in Woman’s Era. Giving and taking dowry has become an organised social evil. Ahmedabad. NOT SO a . for there has been a marked deterioration in moral standards all over the country with a permissive culture slowly but surely seeping in. New Delhi-110055. a student r by In Septembe reportedly raped was s at the Class VIII her classmate two of for Boys ground nt College occurred Governme The incident back in Ludhiana. that these diabetes powders including of allopathic ayurvedic the contain overdoses the so-called given for dispense powder and babas example. Dixit. Call centres have proved a blessing for women with minimum qualification. it – in alternative being transforme opportunity from no them the take decisions as you moved to gives them – to even forces childhood choices. . I fully agree with the writer that the parent should have a thorough enquiry of the groom before getting their daughters married. that not that despite Much Gold’.RIGHT CH Apropos the article Right Choice for Right Career by Kasturi Rangachari (June II. drugs called will have n depend upon with the One of the tablet. The parents of working women. a cheap ns. All person is Census is exercise very curious and Musli Power even a single of India makes the are also or Tidafil. there are pamphlets serious ailments ents and some very advertisem cure even (Second) 2010 claim to also Era ● May Woman’s EDITORIA L C CENSUS: LET IT BE AN OBJECTIVE EXERCISE Vinod C.and what not. For formulatio diabetes contain powdered is of nowadays past same disease. Bangalore. world quo. where gunpoint district of raped at was allegedlyclassmates. Sidenafil to have ical diversity surprising Azam’. are wellthe of allopathic or of Pharmace g especially presence Institute that the teachers schools. sexually transmitted diseases and even murders. the more was created. takes around tested by teaching generic name herbal school exercise this period from market and citrate – the The entire so-called . What s are sold over the can be turn. These completion containing Not only as the teachers resort to of these compound of year for mg . status to do for aeons accepted the middlewomen and they f you are you time.task? with various kinds called Ayurvedic treatment for impotency ‘Sikanderlevel exercise. recent d. The odd timings do not seem to bother them. ATIVE SOUND ALTERNrevival of Ayurveda. Supersoni 25-100 preparatio only the available large number of the schools. and raped incident is of The second 2009. Our country developed a kind of political culture where caste and religion cast their shadows on anything we do. of relief. overdose – and Tadalfie. how danger I explain - B efore intimacy develo ous a close environment ped in school and girls of boys I offer between could be. this data is of immense importance. The best option for ladies would be to burn their own boats by staying up at home. February secluded raped at a three boys class and reads: "The the same The report studied in town. Of the 16 of viagra education. but taken aback. 2 system was found containing has been reportedit cannot Geograph difficult. As it so often happens the girls decide to keep everything to themselves and rarely confide to their parents leading to situations going out of hand when it becomes too late to salvage their reputation or honour or even their chastity.. The parents of such young girls are in the lurch. practically men people on – in other options as most hell bent they reject mine was were today’s lifestyle. and Research Perhaps. of it was A glimpse drugs in utical Sciences the governme government schools. but alternative countries. Date rapes.
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