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Staff Only: The Roll

By Jacob Novak, Katie Brown, Fisher Stroud, Paul Alicea, and


Jill Palmer
1 INT. C WING - DAY 1
The documentary crew, ROTH and COLIN, walk into BAC from the
Dale Hall entrance. Colin carries the camera by his side
while they are walking through the hall. It’s not very
crowded, maybe just a couple stragglers.
ROTH
The TSC’s just on the right down
here.
(a beat)
By the way, just to warn you, these
guys can get pretty weird, so don’t
be surprised.
COLIN
(Just before they enter)
What do you mean?
Roth and Colin enter the TSC to see KATIE sitting at the
desk, pieces of the DSLR strewn around while reading the
manual. She looks up.

KATIE
Hey, Roth! Good to see you again,
glad you were able to come back!
ROTH
Yeah, good to be back.

Roth motions toward Colin.


ROTH (CONT’D)
This is Colin, he’s new with us and
he’s gonna be helping out.
Colin waves his hand in front of the camera.
KATIE
Nice to you meet you! Do we want to
go to the back or--
JACOB walks from the TSC Lab door, calm, but done, and
interrupts.
JACOB
Katie, someone asked Fisher how to
use Photoshop and she passed out
again.
Katie looks towards the camera and Roth, a little
embarrassed.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 2.

KATIE
One second.
She hurriedly goes into the lab.
2 INT. THE CUBE - DAY 2

TALKING HEAD. Katie sits in the Cube.


KATIE
So, it’s been a couple of years,
and the Video Production Team has
changed quite a bit. Alex
graduated, and everyone else pretty
much either quit or dropped out -
except for Amy, she’s still here.

Cut to Amy working at the desk, sipping coffee out of a


skull mug. She looks up and glares at the camera.
KATIE
But I’m the manager now, and we
have a whole new team.

Jacob is the Project Manager. I


guess you could say I’m his mentor.
I see a lot of myself in him.
Cut to Jacob sipping coffee walking into the Lab, and then
walks back out when he sees FISHER, passed out, being
dragged out of the room by PAUL.
KATIE (CONT’D)
Fisher tries her best, but
sometimes life gets the better of
her.
But other than that, the team is
doing pretty well.

Cut to B-roll of team.


KATIE (CONT’D)
Projects haven’t necessarily been
streaming in left and right like
they used to. Apparently Vine has
been stealing all our business and
there isn’t much need for a Video
Production Team anymore. But we’re
a good group, and I think we’ll
pull through.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 3.

We see a new document at the desk open with random letters


held down on the keyboard. The camera zooms out and Fisher
is passed out at the desk.

CUT TO TITLE SEQUENCE.


3 INT. TSC - NIGHT 3
JILL and ERICA are sitting at the VPT desk. Zoom in on the
clock at the top of the computer screen: midnight. Erica is
messing around with Photobooth and laughing, while Jill
stoically watches.
JILL
(tiredly)
Can we please just finish editing?
ERICA
Oookay.
Erica notices a strange video file on the hard drive.

ERICA (CONT’D)
Hey, what’s this?
She opens the video. It’s an old-timey, grainy VHS-type ad
for Juniata, starring the old VPT members.

4 EXT. JUNIATA COLLEGE - DAY 4


We start at the path in front of VLB. EVAN walks into frame,
way too excited to talk about Juniata.

EVAN
Oh, hello! I didn’t see you there.
Let me be the first to welcome you
to JUNIATA COLLEGE!

A cheesily animated logo zooms in.


EVAN (CONT’D)
Where we Eagles encourage you to
think, evolve, and act!

Cut to Evan walking at the sidewalks around the Founders


fountain.
EVAN (CONT’D)
Here at Juniata, we pride ourselves
on our strong sense of tradition
and community. Everybody knows
everybody!
Evan walks up to DOM sitting at the fountain.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 4.

Hey, Dom! You catch Storming of the


Arch the other day?
DOM
Nah, I was meeting with my advisor
about transferring.

EVAN
CUT! Goddammit Dom, get the fuck
out of here!

We reset to Evan walking to the fountain, with AMY in Dom’s


place.
EVAN
Everybody knows everybody! Hey,
Amy! You catch Storming of the Arch
the other day?
AMY
Sure did!
EVAN
Nice!
Evan gives a thumbs up to the camera, but Amy doesn’t.
EVAN (CONT’D)
(to Amy)
Put your hand up, put your hand up!
He smiles back to the camera. We cut to some green screen
footage of Evan throwing a football to a JC highlight reel,
and then Evan staring in amazement at the Grand Canyon.

EVAN (V.O.)
If you’re ever feeling cramped in
the classroom, Juniata has so much
to offer, from playing sports with
your good buds, to venturing out to
the wilderness! If you’re feeling
brave, you can go out to Juniata’s
very own landmark, the cliffs!
After a cheesy weatherman transition, we find Evan at a
green-screened classroom in the Simplified Studio.

EVAN
Whew! That was a long day of
studying. But you know what, every
day of hard work is worth it here
at good ol’ JC! So join me, won’t
you?

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 5.

Evan walks off screen and an old logo for Juniata fades onto
the screen.
EVAN (V.O.)
Juniata College - it’s pretty good!

We cut to a shot of Evan and maybe a couple others (Dom and


Amy?) walking through the quad. They jump up for a High
School Musical-esque pose and freeze-frame, except there’s
no freeze-frame and they just kind of stand there in place.
The slogan, along with "Produced by the Video Production
Team" fades onto the screen before the video shorts out.
5 INT. TSC - NIGHT 5
Katie has emerged from the Cube and is now watching the
video over Jill and Erica’s shoulders.

KATIE
Oh my god. I totally forgot about
that!
Jill and Erica jump, startled by Katie’s sudden appearance.

ERICA
Yeah, it’s okay. It’s kind of
out-dated, though. Maybe we should
redo it.

The camera zooms up on Katie’s face. She has come to a


realization.
KATIE
(whispering)
Oh my god. That’s it!

Katie dashes out of the TSC. The camera crew tries to follow
closely behind.
KATIE
(over her shoulder)
Meeting in 5 minutes!
6 EXT. JUNIATA COLLEGE - QUAD - NIGHT 6
We see Katie sprinting across the quad towards Lesher and
South.
6.

7 INT. SOUTH HALLWAY - NIGHT 7


Katie runs down the hallway towards Jacob’s door. She
catches her breath, then bangs violently on his door. Katie
continues knocking until Jacob answers the door.

JACOB
What?
KATIE
(talking very fast)
I found the old tour video on the
computer with Evan and it’s so good
and we need to recreate it so we’re
having an emergency staff meeting
right now and I have to go get
everyone else and be in the TSC in
5 minutes!
Katie finishes talking, takes a deep breath, and runs back
down the hall. Jacob watches after her for a moment, before
turning to the camera.

JACOB
This is the third time this month.
Jacob shakes his head before closing his door.
8 EXT. JUNIATA COLLEGE - PATH TO EAST - NIGHT 8

Katie runs up to the path to East, but stops and hesitates.


She gauges the distance to East, and changes her mind.
KATIE
Yeah... Nevermind.

Katie pulls her phone out and calls PAUL.


KATIE (CONT’D)
Paul! Staff meeting in 5 minutes!

Katie hangs up and continues running.


9 INT. LESHER HALLWAY - NIGHT 9
Katie runs up, now reaching exhaustion. She knocks on Amy’s
door. There’s a long pause before the door swings open. Amy
answers the door wearing a hooded cloak, and removes her
hood.
AMY
(friendly)
What’s up?
7.

Katie looks at Amy confusedly.


10 INT. TSC LAB - NIGHT 10

Katie is standing up front, while everyone else has taken a


seat around her. Everyone has just finished watching the
video on the projector, and they visibly have very different
thoughts on the video.

KATIE
Ehh?
JAMEY
...What?

KATIE
We’re gonna remake this!
Everyone groans.
KATIE
We don’t have anything better to
do, guys!
DYLAN
Can we get a raise to do this?

KATIE
Good question.
Jacob raises his hand.
KATIE
Jacob?
JACOB
Why did this have to be at 1 AM?

KATIE
Creativity never sleeps, Jacob!
The camera zooms into Fisher in the back, sleeping on a
pillow on the floor.

KATIE
All we have to do is make Juniata
go viral and put the VPT back on
the map!
ZACH
Hey, if there’s anyone who knows a
thing or two about going viral,
it’s Zachary LaBoy.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 8.

JACOB
Don’t you have like six
subscribers?
ZACH
Seven. My dad subscribed to me the
other day because I had good grades
last semester.
(points at the camera)
Shout out to you, Pop-Pop!

KATIE
The more people that know about us,
the more videos we can make.
Blank stares all around.

KATIE
...Which means more money!
Everyone starts nodding in approval.
KATIE
So are y’all ready for this? Who’s
in?
Everyone raises their hands, except Paul.
KATIE
Paul?
PAUL
Hold on.

Paul rolls a D20 die. The roll is a 14 and he looks up.


PAUL
I’m in.
KATIE
Let’s show Vine what the VPT is
really made of!
Everyone begins cheering, except for Jacob.
JACOB
No, that’s not what it...never
mind.
CUT TO BLACK.
9.

11 INT. WRITER’S ROOM - DAY 11


Text is typed across the screen, "Writer’s Room. Tuesday.
1:13 PM." Jacob, Jamey, and ALEX are sitting in the C Wing
Seminar Room.

JACOB
So I don’t think we’ll end up
needing to make any major changes,
we just have change the logo and
use the slogan and things like
that--
Katie walks in the room abruptly and cuts Jacob off.
KATIE
Hey everyone, how are my crack team
of writers doing?
JACOB
Pretty good, I mean this ad isn’t
gonna be anything too crazy, pretty
standard stuff, so...

Katie is appalled by this.


KATIE
I don’t think you understand, guys.
This has to go viral.

Jacob smiles and shakes his head.


JACOB
Does it?

KATIE
Yeah! We need explosions, we need
cats, we need bouncy castles and
car chases!
ALEX
I once saw a video with this
PopTart cat thing, it was pretty
cool.
KATIE
Exactly! Do you think Vine got to
the top with "pretty standard
stuff"?
JACOB
Okay, first, just google Vine. I
don’t think it’s what you think it
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 10.

JACOB (cont’d)
is. Second, like sixteen-hundred
people go to this school, it
doesn’t need to go viral.

KATIE
And that’s exactly why you’re being
replaced. Come on in, Zach!
Zach walks in the room and stops by Katie before sitting
down.

ZACH
You got the stuff?
Katie nods, and they exchange Tide Pods in a quick,
secretive motion. Zach then takes a seat by Jacob.

KATIE
Zach knows viral, so that’s why
he’s taking your spot on the
writing team, and you’re being
promoted to Executive Producer!

JACOB
I don’t think that means anything.
KATIE
Right. So, uh...

Katie motions to the door. Jacob looks expectantly at Jamey


and Alex, who avoid eye contact. Jacob gets up to leave.
KATIE
So Zach, what are you thinking?
ZACH
So I was looking at my analytics,
and I saw that any video where I do
less than five dabs doesn’t cut it,
you know what I mean?
The group converses while Jacob looks back, then at the
camera, shakes his head and walks out the door.
12 EXT. EVAN’S HOUSE - DAY 12

More text across the screen: "Casting. Thursday. 11:12 AM."


Paul and Jacob are walking down 17th Street towards Evan’s
house. Paul is explaining to the camera.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 11.

PAUL
Katie asked me to direct the
commercial. I wasn’t sure at first,
but after consulting the die--
(He holds up the die)
I accepted. So, our first big thing
was casting the star, someone who
commands attention. Naturally, we
reached out to Pennsylvania’s
finest, but, uh, Steve Carell said
no.

JACOB
That’s cause you sent him what
seemed to be a ransom note, and
also-- not from Pennsylvania.

PAUL
Regardless, we’re doing the next
best thing and going old school.
They walk up to the porch, open the screen door, and knock.
After a few moments, Evan answers the door, and is weary of
the cameras.
EVAN
Hi, can I help you?
JACOB
Uh, hi, I’m Jacob, this is Paul.
We’re from the Video Production
Team, we were wondering if we could
talk to you for a second?

Evan looks apprehensive for a moment at the mention of the


VPT, but then welcomes them.
EVAN
Yeah, sure, come on in.

13 INT. EVAN’S KITCHEN - DAY 13


TALKING HEAD.
EVAN
I’ve been out of the VPT for a
couple years now. I was never in a
great head space, and then Dom
started dating Phoebe, and it just
kinda pushed me over the edge. But
since then, I did some soul
searching, I’ve been meeting with a
therapist, at first every day, but
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 12.

EVAN (cont’d)
now we’re at every other day, and,
uh, I’m feeling pretty good.
14 INT. EVAN’S LIVING ROOM - DAY 14

Paul and Jacob are sitting on one couch while Evan sits on
the other.
EVAN
So, what can I do for you guys?

Paul emphatically takes the die from his pocket and presents
it to Evan, getting way too close.
PAUL
Do you believe in fate?

JACOB
Paul, c’mon--
Jacob waves Paul’s arm down.

JACOB (CONT’D)
So you used to work for the VPT,
right?
EVAN
I try to forget, but yeah, I did.
Why do you ask?
JACOB
Well, if you remember that old
Juniata commercial you did, we’re
remaking it to fit in with some of
the new branding stuff and we were
wondering if you wanted to be apart
of it.
PAUL
Yeah, you were so amazing in the
original, we figured we’d come to
you first.
Jacob looks at the camera knowing that Paul is lying. Evan
is uncertain.

EVAN
I don’t know, guys, that was kind
of a dark time for me, and my
therapist has been telling me to
leave it in the past.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 13.

PAUL
Well, my parents keep telling me to
stop putting eggs in the microwave,
but has that stopped me? They won’t
get me a dog, so what else am I
supposed to do?
JACOB
Ease up, Paul, ease up.
(to Evan)
I get that, I heard about some of
the stuff that happened before, but
we’re basically a whole new team,
so you wouldn’t have to worry about
seeing any old faces.
EVAN
Yeah...I just worry that being back
there will bring out the other side
of me.
PAUL
Listen, no one else has the same
passion and spirit that you do. I
can’t think of anybody else who
could possibly be the face of
Juniata other than you.

EVAN
You really think so?
PAUL
Definitely. I know this is a big
ask, but you know, sometimes when I
face life’s big questions, I just
let fate decide.
Paul stands up and extends his arm, die in hand.
PAUL (CONT’D)
(intently)
Roll with me.
Jacob puts his head in his hands.
JACOB
<CENSORED>
PAUL
If it’s over an 11, you join us,
and if not, we’ll leave, no
questions asked.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 14.

JACOB
You don’t have to do that--
EVAN
No...I’ll do it.

Jacob leans back on the couch, not believing that this is


really happening. Evan stands up and takes the die. Paul
nods in approval. Evan rolls on the table, but we can’t
quite see the result. Evan looks back towards Paul.

EVAN
Let’s go think about who we are.
Paul and Evan shake hands, all smiles, while Jacob just sits
there, done.

15 EXT. JUNIATA COLLEGE, HALBRITTER - DAY 15


More text across the screen: "Production, Day 1. Friday.
2:31 PM." Evan, Paul, Zach, and Jill are standing outside
Halbritter. Zach is setting up a camera and a tripod. Evan
is pacing around, psyching himself up to appear on screen.
Paul and Jill are looking over the script.
Paul approaches Evan with a large binder.
PAUL
Okay, here’s the script. You’re
basically just going to be
introducing the college--
Evan cuts Paul off by grabbing the binder and tosses it
aside.

EVAN
I don’t need it.
Paul looks shocked at first, then smiles.

PAUL
I like your style.
Paul retreats back behind the camera, which is now set up
and being operated by Jill.

PAUL (CONT’D)
Okay, quiet on set! Juniata
commercial, scene 1, take 1!
Action!
Evan starts to introduce the college, using the same level
of energy as the first ad, basically doing the same thing.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 15.

Zach is displeased with Evan’s performance. He turns to Paul


and starts to back into frame.
ZACH
Wait, can we cut? Let’s cut.
(to Evan)
Dude, you’re not connecting with
the audience! You gotta be up to
date on your trends. What’s your
favorite YouTube video?

EVAN
I don’t know, the Harlem Shake is
cool.
Zach scoffs and looks around before grabbing and handing
Evan a half-full bottle of water.

ZACH
Here, do it again, and on my
signal, just flip the bottle.
Evan takes it, confused. He’s not hip and with it.

PAUL
Okay, scene 1, take 2! Action!
Evan again starts to do basically the same thing, but with a
little less energy. Zach points to Evan when he finishes,
and he flips the water bottle really high, clearly not what
Zach meant. Zach walks into frame again.
ZACH
Cut!

Paul tries to seem authoritative and affirms Zach.


PAUL
Yeah, that’s a cut everybody!

Zach walks up to Evan and tosses the water bottle aside.


ZACH
Okay, so this clearly isn’t your
thing.

EVAN
(annoyed)
Listen, this isn’t my first time
doing this, you know. I had a good
thing going.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 16.

ZACH
(sarcastically)
Yeah, maybe back in 2005!
(He raises a hand to Jill)
Am I right, Jill?

JILL
No.
Zach grabs the camera and walks up to Evan.

ZACH
Here, look at this.
Zach turns around the viewfinder on the camera to face Evan.
ZACH (CONT’D)
You see that? That’s you, and
you’re not good enough. Look at it,
be better, and try again.
Evan is getting visibly fed up. He’s turning. Zach holds the
camera on Evan, zoomed in very close. Paul is a little
uncomfortable.
PAUL
Alright. Scene 1, take 3! Action!
Cut to Zach’s footage. Evan is getting angry.

EVAN
Hi, I’m Evan, this is Juniata
College! Where we encourage you to
think about who you are!

ZACH
(whispering)
Now dab!
EVAN
What?
ZACH
Dab!
Zach mimes dabbing.

EVAN
No, I’m not going to dab.
Zach hands the camera to Paul.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 17.

ZACH
Here, I’ll show you.
Zach runs up to Evan and moves to grab his arms.
ZACH (CONT’D)
You just take your arm and -
EVAN
Don’t touch me!

ZACH
Here, do something like this.
(turns to the camera)
Sup, LaBoiz, it’s ya boi, Zach
LaBoy, here at Juniata College!
(turns to Evan)
See what I mean? You gotta connect
to the audience through the camera.
Evan’s hands start to shake. His old self is returning.
EVAN
Okay, I’m done, I can’t do this.
(to Paul)
I’m sorry, Paul, this was a
mistake, I can’t do this, not
again.

Evan starts to walk away.


ZACH
Man, what do you expect from
someone who still watches Harlem
Shake?

Evan turns around and starts to yell and run at Zach,


everybody tries to hold them back, it’s all really
incoherent.

16 EXT. FOUNDER’S FOUNTAIN - DAY 16


Text on screen: "Production, Day 3. Monday. 4:16 PM." Paul,
Zach, Jill, and Katie are all on set. Zach is stretching,
getting ready to do some parkour since he replaced Evan as
the star of the video. Cut to Katie’s TALKING HEAD.

KATIE
Things didn’t exactly work out with
Evan and he quit, so we gave the
lead role to Zach since he was
taking the reins already. We’re
getting ready to shoot some of the
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 18.

KATIE (cont’d)
parkour scenes, but it’s almost 5
and we haven’t gone down to the
park yet, so I don’t know what’s
going on.

Cut back to filming, where Zach is getting into position,


clearly not feeling alright.
PAUL
Alright, scene 11, take 3. And,
action!
Zach jumps into frame from the side.
ZACH
And if you ever want to grab some
food, just slide on past the
fountain and head down to Sheetz!
Zach runs and does some parkour shit across the fountain,
but falls off and holds his stomach.

PAUL
Hey, are you okay?
ZACH
Yeah, yeah, let’s just run it one
more time.

Zach starts to walk back, but stops, turns, and pukes into
the fountain.
PAUL
Whoa, cut, cut!
Everybody runs after to Zach to check on him. Cut to a
TALKING HEAD with Paul.
PAUL
(with heavy heart)
Yeah, so it turns out that Zach had
been taking Tide Pods for quite
some time, and, uh, he had to go to
the hospital.

TALKING HEAD with Katie, who looks distraught.


KATIE
He said he just needed to do his
laundry.
19.

17 INT. BAC C116 - NIGHT 17


Everyone has gathered in C116 for ALFIE’S DEATH SCENE.
People are milling around, getting everything set up,
lights, cameras, etc. Paul is directing some others. He
turns to address the entire group.
PAUL
Okay guys, it’s a big one tonight,
Alfie’s death scene, so everyone
needs to be on their A-game!
(clapping)
Cut to a TALKING HEAD with Jacob.

JACOB
At first I was a little skeptical
about killing off Alfie, but I
gotta say, it really shows what
Juniata is all about. We’re still
waiting on the actor though, Paul
hired a new guy, but he hasn’t
shown yet.
Back to everybody milling around in C116. CONNOR enters,
wearing a clown costume and makeup.

JACOB
Can I help you...?
CONNOR
Yeah, someone named Paul hired me
for some commercial, do you know
where he is?
JACOB
...Yeah, one second.

Jacob turns abruptly.


JACOB (CONT’D)
(yells)
PAUL!

PAUL
(nonchalantly)
What’s up?
JACOB
You hired a clown?

Paul hasn’t seen Connor yet, so he thinks Jacob is mocking


his casting.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 20.

PAUL
Alright, no need for the names, we
haven’t even seen him act yet.

JACOB
No, you hired a clown.
Jacob turns and points to Connor. Connor waves. People have
started to form a crowd around Paul and Jacob.

PAUL
Oh.
JACOB
How did you not realize that?

PAUL
I don’t know, dude, his Craigslist
ad just said he performed at
birthday parties...

JACOB
So you’re saying that you’ve
definitely hired actors for
birthday parties before, right?
When has that ever been what that
means?

PAUL
Well, maybe we should give him
chance, he came all this way--

JACOB
No, okay, absolutely not, just send
him home, I’ll find someone and
we’ll film it tomorrow.
Jacob starts to walk away and heads for the door.

PAUL
Well, I’m the director and I say we
use him.
Jacob turns, visibly frustrated. Cut to Fisher.

FISHER
(meekly)
Why is there a clown?
JACOB
Yeah? Well, one of your actors
quit, and another is in the
hospital, so maybe we shouldn’t be
taking direction from you.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 21.

Connor still stands near the door in the background.


CONNOR
Wait, what?
PAUL
(defensively)
Listen, sometimes that’s how the
dice roll.
Cut to Fisher, who is even more terrified.

FISHER
I’m afraid of clowns!
No one listens.

JACOB
Oh, shut up about the dice, make
your own decisions for once!
JILL
Yeah, that schtick is getting old.

AMY
You don’t understand the dark
energies at play here.
ERICA
What is that supposed to mean?
The whole crowd starts arguing with each other for a few
seconds until Paul holds up the die.
PAUL
Maybe we should roll for it.
JACOB
You know, what, yeah, sure, roll
for it, see what happens.

Everyone gets silent and Paul rolls the die. We don’t see
what the result is, but Paul looks up and he and Jacob stare
at each other intently.
18 INT. TSC - NIGHT 18

Roth and Colin are sitting at the table in the TSC Lab and
the camera rests on the table, still recording. They’re
making small talk.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 22.

COLIN
And what was that bit in the script
with the hill people abducting
Alfie to the peace chapel?
ROTH
I don’t know, they’ve always been
kinda weird like that.

Suddenly, Katie speeds through the door from the TSC, on her
phone.
KATIE
Okay, I’m heading over now!

Roth and Colin notice this and quickly grab their equipment
and follow after Katie.
ROTH
What’s going on?

KATIE
I don’t know?
They walk down the hall and Katie bursts into C116.
Everybody is yelling at each other, taking sides. Fisher is
waiting for Katie near the door, clearly distraught.

FISHER
Why is there a clown?!
Zoom in on Connor, standing in the corner, shying away from
the situation. Katie is looking around the room while
everybody argues. Team Jacob is Erica, Jill, Dylan, and
Aisha, while Team Paul consists of Amy, Jamey, Alex, and
Corey. Katie tries to get everybody’s attention, but fails.
It all builds up really intensely, and then Connor walks up
behind Fisher.

CONNOR
Hey, are you okay? Do you know
what’s going on here?
Fisher freaks out, and passes out in the middle of the room.
Everybody stops, shuts up, and looks. We pull back to see
the whole room, and it’s basically like a Renaissance
painting. Jacob is done. He takes a beat, and then:
JACOB
Someone call Public Safety.

He walks out the room.


CUT TO BLACK.
23.

19 INT. TSC - DAY 19


Text rolls on-screen. "Two and a half weeks later." We see
Paul and Corey are still going at it, editing and going
through footage. Katie walks in from the Cube.

KATIE
How’s it going, guys?
COREY
Alright, going pretty slow, I
guess.
Katie sighs and looks at the camera.
20 INT. THE CUBE - DAY 20

TALKING HEAD with Katie.


KATIE
(morosely)
Things just haven’t been the same
since the roll. What’s left of the
team is still working on the ad,
but I don’t know if they ever
finished Alfie’s death scene. Last
week I tried to call a staff
meeting but only Fisher showed up,
and Zach skyped in from the
hospital. It’s been a rough couple
weeks.
21 INT. TSC - DAY 21
Katie pulls Paul aside while Corey continues to work on the
video.
KATIE
Hey man, the deadline for the
commercial is coming up... are you
guys going to be done by then?
PAUL
I mean, with just the five of us,
it’s gonna take a little longer.
Face-tracking Zach to the clown is
harder than I thought it would be.
Katie sighs dejectedly and exits the room.
24.

22 INT. VLB - DAY 22


We see Jacob studying on the second-floor lounge, surrounded
by towers of books. His hair is disheveled and he looks as
if he’s running on 2 hours of sleep.

Cut to TALKING HEAD with Jacob.


JACOB
I switched majors! I’m just
starting out in the pre-med
program, and at first I was worried
about a junior sticking out in
O-Chem 1, but as soon as I put my
lanyard on my neck and complained
about fire alarms in Sherwood, I
fit right in.

Cut to B-roll of the others.


JACOB (CONT’D)
I don’t work for the VPT any more,
and I know Jill works for
Phone-a-thon, Erica moonlights at
the TSC on Saturdays, Dylan sells
cupcakes in Ellis, and Aisha just
dropped out, even though she was
two months from graduating. But
other than that, I haven’t really
talked to anybody since I left.
Cut back to Jacob studying upstairs, while Katie walks in
downstairs, looking around for Jacob. When she sees him, she
walks up.

JACOB
Hey, what’s up?
KATIE
Not much.

She just stands there for a second.


KATIE (CONT’D)
Everybody’s gone and I just want
you to come back.

JACOB
Listen, I don’t have time for that
stuff anymore, I’m pre-med now.
Jacob gestures towards his books, and then Katie just swipes
them off the table.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 25.

KATIE
Yeah, well I’m post-med about the
whole thing! We can’t do this
without you all, what happened to
you and me being the Batman and
Robin of the VPT?
JACOB
When was that ever the case?
KATIE
Look-- we’re having a staff meeting
tomorrow night, and I need you to
be there.
Katie starts to walk away.

JACOB
I have a bio exam tomorrow night.
KATIE
Be there!

Jacob looks at the camera, and then down to the books on the
floor.
23 INT. TSC - NIGHT 23
Katie stands in the TSC Lab, waiting for everyone to arrive.
Team Paul is already assembled, and Fisher has Zach on Skype
on her laptop. Erica, Jill, Dylan, and Aisha trickle into
the room, and Katie is really excited.
KATIE
Yay, you guys made it! Aisha, I
thought you dropped out!
AISHA
Yeah, speaking of, do you have any
guest meals left?

Jacob walks in.


KATIE
I thought you had a test.

JACOB
Yeah, I got out early, I guess.
He looks at the camera, clearly lying. He takes a seat.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 26.

KATIE
Well...
She pulls out a party blower and uses it.
KATIE (CONT’D)
Welcome back, everybody! I’m glad
that we were able to set our
differences aside and come together
again.

Cut to the room, where everybody is separated by team, and


staring down one another.
KATIE (CONT’D)
Right?

JAMEY
Well, these guys left and made us
do the whole thing by ourselves.
JILL
You were the ones who brought the
clown into it.
Everybody chimes in and starts arguing, not as intensely as
before, but still heated.
KATIE
Guys, guys!
No one pays attention, so she grabs the party blower and
uses it to get everyone to shut up.
KATIE
Is there anything that will make
you guys stop fighting?
It’s silent.

KATIE (CONT’D)
How about we roll for it? Paul,
give me the die.
Paul takes the die from his pocket and gives it to Katie.

KATIE (CONT’D)
How about if it’s a good number,
you guys stop fighting and rejoin
the VPT, and if not, you can leave
again.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 27.

Most people nod. Katie goes to the table and everybody


gathers. She rolls and it’s an awful number, probably a
nat-1. She looks up excitedly.
KATIE (CONT’D)
Is that good?
Jacob and Paul look at each other and shrug.
Cut to a TALKING HEAD with Paul.

PAUL
So, like, a one is the worst thing
you can get, but we were pretty
much done anyways, so I guess it
doesn’t matter.

Cut to a TALKING HEAD of Jacob.


JACOB
It’s the thought that counts. Also,
pre-med was really hard and my
parents weren’t a fan of me
spending four more years at
college, so...
Cut back to the room after the roll.
JACOB
Yeah, that’s good enough for me.
ALL
Yeah, alright.

Everybody returns to their seats, and we see Fisher give a


sigh of relief, clearly stressed.
KATIE
Well, uh, that’s kind of all I had
planned for tonight, so... do you
want to watch the ad?
Team Paul cheers. Katie heads over to the computer.
KATIE (CONT’D)
Alright, well, remember guys, you
did this. And you should be proud
of the work you put in.
Katie presses play and the video starts. Zoom into the
video.
28.

24 EXT. JUNIATA COLLEGE - DAY 24


We see a really, really bad 30-second montage of all the
footage from Evan, Zach, and Connor. Playing underneath is a
voiceover from Paul.

PAUL (V.O.)
Juniata is a place for students of
all kinds. We have cool students,
funny students, and passionate
students. Pretty much any student
is welcome here.
The logo flashes on screen.
PAUL (CONT’D)
Juniata-- a place for students.

25 INT. TROHA’S OFFICE - DAY 25


Zoom out from a laptop screen on a desk and we see Katie and
Jacob on one side of it. Katie is freaking pumped, and Jacob
leans back and hides his face.

KATIE
Ehhhhh?
Cut to TROHA on the other side of the table, looking at them
in disbelief.

TROHA
No!
ROLL CREDITS.

26 EXT. JUNIATA COLLEGE - DAY 26


Post credits sequence. On the quad in the distance, we see
Katie and Connor, dressed as the clown still, walking
together. Slowly, Katie reaches for Connor’s hand.

CUT TO BLACK.

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