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Dissecting a genre forces you to look at all of the aspects that make that style

characteristically itself. When attempting to translate genres, information, organization, and

many other characteristicsother conventions must be adjusted for the new audience and the new

style. Through thisBy doing so, the new piece can gain new meanings and attention to

overlooked aspects of the old piece. Moreover, tTranslation can also pose challenges, but a focus

on the characteristics and goal of the work help keep it on track. For the second writing project, I

translated … to … by doing 1,2,3 (briefly list the steps).

The most critical decision of WP2 was to determine the genre that the primary source

was going to be translated into. I came to decision to write a poem since this project was all Commented [MOU1]: decided

about creativity, and poetry gives the author complete artistic control while allowing for a large

audience. First off, poetry is a broad genre that grants structural, organizational, and thematic

freedom, thus, supporting the purest form of expression from authors by erasing common literary

limitations. Without hindrance, deep emotions find an outlet that, rather than making them

sappy, makes them real. Secondly, the interpretation of the poem - be that intended by the poet or Commented [MOU2]: Revise

constructed by the readers - permits for many meanings to be derived from the same piece of

work. As a result, people find personal connections unlike persuasive literature. Due to these

aspects, I decided that a poem was going to provide me many options as a writer and compel me

to improve my literary decision making.

Next, in the process I had to decide the genre of my primary source and what theme I

wanted to work with. I started by looking up the most popular online news articles, under the

assumption there was a reason for their popularity, and found the my article “Top Ffive Rregrets
Commented [MOU3]: All words should start with a capital
of the Ddying.” The major theme which addresses, the dissatisfaction with life choices, is letter in article titles.
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something that is often labeled taboo and not addressed because it is scary and includes ideas

that individuals don’t want to accept. Due to the censoring of the concepts, there are untapped Commented [MOU4]: Are reluctant (replace negative
constructions)
emotions that the author avoids by using only quotes and facts, which, I believe, hid the true

significance of the theme. It was an inspiring article that everyone should hear, but it was just in

the wrong genre to acceptably express the ideas and gain readership by a larger audience.

The poem I wrote as the translation is targeted toward young adults, especially those

looking to live life to the fullest. In the writing of the poem, I made decisions, such as a length

and word choice, that were aimed towards the younger generations. This Writing the poem was

an attempt to get away from the wording of the primary source that was very much written for

middle- aged adults, especially housewives. These two audiences look for very different things

in written pieces of work: young adults look for realism that makes them feel understood, and

middle-aged adults look for entertainment and escape from their daily lives. For that reason, they

might interpret the poem differently but will still connect with it since the poem is accessible to

all ages since it holds truths that can be applied at any time in life.

As I mentioned earlier, poems can have a wide range of structures and organizations. I

ran into a challenge with this aspect of my translation because, with unlimited options, trying to

choose the best fit for the theme was difficult. I therefore thought about what would best appease Commented [MOU5]: I think you can condense this
sentence.
my audience to help narrow the options. Short lines and small stanzas allow ease of reading,

which was needed for an audience who has a short attention span. Further, I reduced the amount

of descriptive words from the original for a similar reason., Instead, and I ended up reliedying on

the images to illustrate the scenes instead. For instance….. Overall, bBoth of those choices also

contribute to a concentration on the thesis of the poem rather thaen secondary details. Commented [MOU6]: Use words, like “further,” instead,
rather, for instance etc. to connect sentences.
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Along the same lines, I decided to make most of the stanzas have a rhyme pattern. For

example, “Ernest wished he had lived true/ Tuned out the voices, made the choices, / And

completed the dreams he wanted to do” where the first and last lines have end rhyme and the

middle has an internal rhyme. This style of rhyme creates a flow within each of the stanzas that

pulls the reader through the lines. It also makes the lines stick in in the head of the reader leading

to an engaging piece. But However, this approach in itself posed a challenge because the lines

could feel forced or incongruent- produced by need for a rhyme. Thankfully, revisions by peers

smoothed out these problems so readers do not get stuck mid-line, which would ruin in the

fluidity that is trying to be achieved by the same device. Commented [MOU7]: Revise. This sentence sounds like
there is too much going on.
Then Further, it came down to deciding what elements of the primary source, the

article,article that I was goinghad to keep in or leave out of the poem. First, sSince the it was an

online newspaper article was a online publication, the section titles were bolded as well as

important ideas. I took these as my leading ideas for each of my stanzas. With the limitations of Commented [MOU8]: Break this up. Talk about “important
ideas” in the next sentence.
style of poem I chose, many details- the quotes from the book- had to be left out. I was careful to

create images about the interviewees’, the elderly people, lives that could be interpretation by the

reader and fill in the details that were missing. This was sometimes challenging because I had to

choose the part of the interviewee’s story that would convey the most meaning forcing a

balancing act of correctness and comprehension. On the side of accuracy I condensed the

article’s introduction in this way, “In the dark days of the white hallways/ Today I asked their

biggest regrets” which kept the setting and the idea being addressed the same. Although much of

the article is not expressly reflected in the poem, the translation’s focus was to keep the

underlying message. Commented [MOU9]: In this paragraph, you mix the ideas
of including and excluding the material. Maybe, it is more
effective to address what you included first and then talk
about what you excluded. It can be done in the same
paragraph.
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With the idea of comprehension in mind I changed the point of view from the reporter, to Commented [MOU10]: Be concise

the author of the book that she was quoting from. Trying to represent a tertiary source point of

view in a poem would be very difficult and unnecessarily confusing. With the author/interviewer

as the voice in the poem, it allows for the reader to imagine all of the interviewees through the

eyes of the speaker. In addition, iIt also allowed for a dialogue to be formed between the speaker Commented [MOU11]: “Also” is a good word but you can
vary this “connector” by using “in addition,” additionally,
further, moreover etc.
and the reader at the end of the poem, “And I pray you will say” forcing the reader to think about

the ideas in accordance to themselves.

The design behind what to include came from the handout “Revision Strategies” which

states, “ADD: …context, a story, characters, adjectives…DELETE: details that distract or

confuse the reader…tangents that are neither pivotal nor essential to your purpose…”

(Browning, 1) This encouraged the most pivotal information to be saved while inferior details be

removed. It resulted in a poem that follows a logical path, but at the same time is engaging. Commented [MOU12]: Perhaps, this paragraph belongs to
the part where you talk about what material you included.

The most noticeable change I made to the information from the article was constructing

names for the elderly people that were interviewed. On the surface, they make the ideas more

personal and relatable, but going further the names remind the reader that this is about real

people I also did not choose the names in accident, and each has a connection to the regret they

are representing. Ernest for example, sounds like earnest meaning “showing depth and sincerity

of feeling,” wanted be true himself but couldn’t. Other people were named after pop culture

characters who they are the most unlike or associated with common sayings.

The last big challenge in writing the poem was deciding what the thesis was going to be. Commented [MOU13]: I would replace it with the
“moment.” (though this word works as well)
The function of an article versus a poem is very different and therefore what they are trying to

convey is also very different. I decided to make my thesis based off the last idea the reporter Commented [MOU14]: Revise. The word “different” is in
both parts of the sentence.
states in her article, “what's your greatest regret so far, and what will you set out to achieve or
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change before you die?” In this way, the poem’s function became a warning of all the things that

you could end up regretting if you don’t live life to the fullest. To make this idea even more

impactful I repeated the line “In the dark days of the white hallways” which resets the reader

back to the thesis like a conclusion in an essay. The rhyme of the poem is also broken in the

stanza to make that transition even more evident.

Throughout this whole process I found myself going through the steps that Dirk outlines

in her paper “Navigating Genres.” Because in this writing project it is more about writing

appropriately rather than writing excellence, the dissection of the genres themselves was of the

highest importance. As Dirk explains that it is all about, “recognizing the rhetorical situation

of your action and choosing to act in a manner that would result in the outcome you desired”

(Dirk, 253) Therefore the biggest take away of the project was to remember to identify the goals

and audience of the piece, and accommodate to those aspects, and let those limitations guide the

piece.

9.5/10

Jenna,

The poem is beautiful! The writing choices that you made while working on the poem work so

well that I had goose bumps when reading it. As for the analytical essay, my only suggestion is

that you should pay particular attention to revising sentences. While the essay is well-organized

(there is just one instance where I recommended that you should move one paragraph), some

sentences were not written in your concise and clear style. Probably, you were rushed or

something. I indicated those sentences, but carefully read the whole piece and see if you can see

some sentences that need revision.


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Works Cited

Browning, Randi. “Revision Strategies.”

“Navigating Genres.” Writing Spaces: Readings on Writing, by Kerry Dirk, vol. 1, Parlor Press,

2010, pp. 249–262.