When things come too easy, we re suspect.

Do they have to get complicated before we believe they re for real? We re raised to believe that the course of true love never runs smoothly. There always has to be obstacles in Act Two before you can live happily ever after in Act Three. But what happens when then obstacles aren t there? Does that mean there s something missing? Do we need drama to make a relationship work? It s a pretty common belief that women use the left, emotional side of their brain, n men the right, more logical side. But is it really that cut n dry? It s seems that when it comes to affairs of the heart, there s a battle between what we know n what we feel. So what do u do in a situation that leaps back and forth between the left n the right side? When it comes to relationships, is it smarter to follow ur heart or ur head? I got to thinking about safe sex. Odd how only when our physical life is at risk, do we follow certain guidelines to protect ourselves. But what about your emotional lives? Wouldn t it be nice if there was a pamphlet to warn us what unsafe behavior might be high risk to ourselves or our relationships? Even if you take precautions and emotionally try to protect yourself, when you crawl in bed with someone, is sex ever safe? I started thinking about honesty. Maybe the idea was overrated. Maybe coming clean is the ultimate selfish act, a way to absolve yourself by hurting someone that doesn t deserve to be hurt. I cheated in a test with 3 friends in grade 5. They both confessed and failed the class. I never told anyone, and it never mattered. In a relationship, is honesty really the best policy? I got to thinking about men and women and relationships. Or more to the point, how women feel men disappoint them in relationships. Then a radical, almost earth-shattering thought popped into my head. What if everything isn t the man s fault? After a certain age, a certain number of relationships, if it s still not working and the ex s seem to be moving on and we don t, perhaps the problem isn t the last boyfriend, or the one before him, or even the one before him. Could it be that the problem isn t them, but horrors of horrors, it is us? Soul mates. Two little words, one big concept. A belief that someone, somewhere, is holding the key to your heart and your dream house. All you have to do it is find them. So, where is this person? And if you love someone and it didn t work out, does that mean they weren t your soul mate? Were they just a runner-up in the game show Happily Ever After ? Soul mates reality or torture device? The Eskimos invented hundred of words for snow . And we ve invented three times as many for relationship . But the more words we invent, the harder it is to define things. In a world where you can date without sex, screw without dating and then keep sex partners as friends long after screwing is over, what really defines a relationship? I thought about what a friend said, she wasn t having sex because she wanted a relationship, and I was having mind-blowing sex hoping to turn it into a relationship. So there you have it, we ve got a relationship without sex and a sex without relationship. Which had a better shot at survival? I couldn t help but wonder, what comes first: the chicken or the sex?

what to do? Rely on the old philosophy of forgive and forget? And even if a couple can manage the forgiveness. late night phone calls obsessing about a relationship. I cant help but whine: are we there yet? And there s no way to avoid marriage. so many mistakes. are inevitably a series of compromises. Perhaps. someone usually gets hurt. no matter how good. So many choices. Are all these improvements in communication really helping us communicate? In matters of love. dare I say it. The hard thing about fighting in a relationship is that there s no referee. woulda buckle up and just keep on going. It took me six months to realize I wanted to be with him. but I still like a song with a melody that I can sing to. There s no one to tell you which comments are below the belt or when to go your separate corners. As a result. I wondered how many were mid-fight like myself. right guys. Maybe you just have to say what s in your heart. When it comes to relationships.Walking home from ADD Another Dating Disaster I worried that there s a reason why it s called mind-blowing sex. Maybe that physical connection obliterates the chance of an intellectual one. so many detours. Do you really know when it s right? And how do you know? Are there signs? Fireworks? Is it right when it feels comfortable or is comfortable a sign that there aren t fireworks? Is hesitation a sign that it s not right or is it a sign that you re not ready? In matters of love . or maybe it s possible to find both. right answers. And now I couldn t wait another minute. The Indians had to wait up to 6 months for a response. in the same zip code? In view of current circumstances I wondered: are men just women with balls? So many roads. Maybe we live closer to each other. how do you know when it s right? >> Maybe there are no right moments. has any really conquered the forgetness? Can you really forgive what you can t forget? Relationships. As we speed along to the destination called Who We Hope To Be . shoulda. couldn t help but wonder: What are we fighting for? . when does the art of compromise become compromising? I spent the afternoon thinking about my friends: body image depression. But how much of ourselves should we be willing to sacrifice for the other person before we stop being ourselves? In a relationship. do actions really speaker louder than words? Later that night I got to thinking about relationships and partial lobotomies. As I looked around. As we drive along this road called life. the harder it is to figure out why they re yelling. Did I mention that these are my male friends? So. That s what I was hoping because great sex is great. occasionally a girl would find herself a little lost. two seemingly different ideas that might be perfect together like chocolate and peanut butter. And when that happens she has to let go of the coulda. maybe men and women aren t from different planets as pop culture would have us believe. But until that day arrives. unpredictable mood swings. the more stuff they have between them. Think how much easier it would all be if there was some surgical procedure to whisk away all the ugly memories and mistakes and leave only the fun trips and special holidays. And it seems the closer a couple gets.

That carefree time when our schedules were as wide open as our hearts. Some say a daughter s relationship with her father is the model for all her subsequent relationships with men. Otherwise. heartbreak and break-ups are the hardest kind of work. As progressive as our society claims to be. how do you retain a sense of value when you have nothing concrete to show for it? Because at the end of yet another failed relationship. have we missed the boat? I started to think about belief. there are still certain life targets we re all supposed to hit. Maybe pessimism is something we have to apply daily. written in the starts. Is that just pop psychology or is there some truth to it? And if you were given a less than perfect model. So shouldn t there be some kind of credit for enduring them? And if not. the concept that we re not really responsible for the course of our lives. but many life experiences behind me. you break out in a rash? Is something wrong with the system or is it you? Do we really want these things? Or are we just programmed? So here I was. conquer all? Is hope a drug we need to go off of. After being hit by a bridal wave. Although at what point do separate interests become separate bedrooms? I couldn t help but wonder: to be a couple. and a home to call your own. or the lack of them. Sometimes they look prettier on the outside. or is it keeping us alive? What s the harm in believing? . how you bounce back when reality batters your belief system and love does not . like moisturizer. your love life tends to feel more random. if you live in a city where you cant see the stars. but instead feel comfortable getting different things from different people. Once we ve found what we ve been searching for. a woman with no financial security. I got to thinking about fate. every kiss. does that mean a life of less than perfect relationships? I couldn t help but wonder: how much does a father-figure figure? Later that night. Maybe it s not advisable to be an optimist after the age of 30. And what s inside can be different than it seems. Did that mean nothing? Afterall. can we still take a wrong step and wander off our personal Milky Way? I couldn t help but wonder: can you make a mistake and miss your fate? So I got to thinking about days gone by. when all you have are war wounds and self doubt. why are some of us reluctant to let go of our single selves? Is single life such a flurry of fun with friends that settling down fills us with the urge to shake things up again? And why does becoming a couple imply settling down? Maybe we shouldn t expect to get everything from one man. breakups and babies began to weigh us down. is pre-ordered from some cosmic catalogue. do you have to put your single self on the shelf? That s the thing about relationships. I couldn t help but wonder: does that sense of adventure still flicker inside us? Or when it comes to being carefree single girls. as promised.I started thinking about restlessness and relationships. Marriage. And even if our every man. you have to wonder: was it all worth it? I got to thinking about fathers. The time before the baggage. babies. every heartache. that it s all predestined. Maybe that explains why. But what if instead of breaking out in a smile. I tried to get my head around the concept of happily ever after.

the jury decides the outcome. There are hundreds of articles written about the New Man. not to mention a relationship. the victims must decide their own fate. So maybe it is a better strategy to marry a friend. present and future tense. single women. I mean a relationship and its connection to the past. After weathering all the ups and downs you could find yourself with nothing. you can lose your shirt. However. you can lose your will to live. ever figure it out? do we need distance to get close? . Maybe. the stakes get even higher. too. once you re into your mid-thirties. I couldn t help but wonder: why do we keep on investing? As I got out of the shower I started thinking about sexpectations . It should be called waiting for the other shoe to drop . How can two people. So. judgmental: bad. as smart. we assume men s do. And if the date is good. in the absence of sex whether that s the arrangement or what happens after a few years what distinguishes this companion from your many others? When it comes to saying I do . At a certain age we ve all had relationships that are far from past perfect. when it comes to finance and dating. In a relationship. place or even a profession is not for you. Why is it always something? Later that day I got to thinking about tense relationships. mired in the mess. is a relationship a relationship without the zsa zsa zsu? Later that day I got to thinking about stock market and dating. but does this New Man really exist? Perhaps he s just the Old Man renamed and repackaged by a clever PR woman. If it s not the sex between me and you then someone has to become a Jew. Women are known to be verbal than men but when does criticism that s constructive become destructive? Are there times when the ladies should just shut the fuck up? As women s roles evolve and change. Are they really that different? If you have a bad stock. And yet in human. it shouldn t be called dating . And by that.I think it s pretty much agreed that it goes open-mined: good. We re aware. But life still manages to throw us the curve balls. Are the men of today less threatened by a woman s power or are they just acting? I got to thinking about trials and trial separations. is it better to ignore your better judgment and read between the lines or should you judge a book by its cover? More singles have long-term success with friends. If you have a bad date. that we cant expect perfection. In a court room. If it is instantly clear that a person. But are we being too quick to judge judgment? Perhaps judgment is not so much a snap decision as an early warning and detection device. but how much does that past relationship affect our dream of a future perfect? And as I became more tense I couldn t help but wonder: can you get to a future if your past is present? One of the signs that a female gorilla is in love is that she can be picking nits off her male companion. nit-picking can ruin a perfectly good evening.

jokes instead of poetry. did we have it right in high school? It seems like everyday. even when we try to keep it light. And the whole city has to hear about it. or a heart. there s no safety net. harsh reality of daylight. emails instead of love songs. how do we wind up in the dark? So long had life together been That once the snow began to fall. Have we graduated past our ability to find true love? When it comes to matters of the heart. Why are we should -ing all over ourselves? . your whole life is about the pursuit of fun. Is it something we could learn to digest? Or have we become romance-intolerant? I wondered if should was another disease plaguing women. But what about in men? Maybe we re better off when we thought less and kissed more. pretending not to believe the cherishing of eyes. people are getting hurt. Hundred of hundreds of cards all decreeing you re the one . Since high school. that family. hairstyles and food. Then you grow up and learn to be cautious. But what about the injuries that don t get a siren. You could break a bone. When did it stop being fun and started being scary? I started thinking about my retro-relationships.When you re young. It seems we re always looking for that one thing to makes our lives complete. According to certain scientists. Just imagine the hundreds of late night phone calls all over this one idea. When it comes to men. most women I know have acquired better taste in clothes. it did. I couldn t help but wonder: when will waiting for the one be done? In the cold. And it s not just with love. whether you re falling into a hole in the street or possibly falling back in love? Just how dangerous is an open heart? I blame Valentine s Day. in life. And. that chance. it seemed unending. Would beat against my palm like butterflies We accept Tasti-D-Light instead of real ice cream. But in the harsher reality of a women who just slept with someone she likes. Did we want babies and a perfect honeymoon? Or did we think we should have babies and perfect honeymoons? How do we separate what we could do from what we should do? And here s an alarming thought: it s just not peer pressure. lest the flakes should make her eyelids wince. all day. You look before you leap and sometimes you don t leap at all because there s not always someone there to catch you. Questions like: Does he like me? Will he call again? and the classic Where is this all going? . This chemical may also account for the series of terrifying questions that involuntarily pop into our minds after just one casual tryst. I knew it didn t matter. I d shield them with my hands And they. whenever a woman has sex her body produces a chemical which causes her to emotionally attach. That job. It s no wonder when we re faced with the real thing we can t stomach it. That. it seems to be coming from within.

the people who wasn t us to live in it. The world tell us to get real . more specifically. we need denial. Denial: friend of foe? They say the unexamined life is not worth living but what if the examining becomes your life? Is that living or just procrastinating? And what if all helpful lunches and late-night phone calls to friends have made us all girl talk and no girl action? Is it time to stop procrastinating? . but what happens when living in reality means living in pain. how bad can it be? Maybe the reality is. or Brooklyn? If a defence mechanism can get us through the difficult times.My conversation with Miranda had brought me back to reality or. fear.

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