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Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
A structured training program that teaches the language and conversational skills of Speed Seduction .
Speed Seduction is a registered trademark of Ross Jeffries, used with permission.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Table of Contents
Page No. Title Page Legal Notices Table of Contents Product Content Product Protection and User Consent Formatting and Conventions Acknowledgements Forward Registration Important Note About Exercises and Assignments 1.0 INTRODUCTION AND GETTING STARTED i ii iii vi vi vii ix x xii xii 1 D1-T1 Disk and Track No.*
1.2 1.3 1.4 1.5 1.6 2.0 2.1 2.1.1 2.1.2 2.1.3 2.1.4 2.2 2.2.1 2.2.2 2.2.3 2.2.4 2.2.5 2.2.6 2.3 2.3.1 2.3.2 2.3.3 2.3.4 2.4 3.0 3.1 3.1.1
Why Is This Course Needed? What We Will Handle, and How Investing In Yourself, Or Not Can We Change The Way You Speak? Manipulation and Ethics Concerns SPEAKING AND LANGUAGE
1 2 3 4 5 7
D1-T10 D1-T15 D1-T24 D1-T26 D1-T32 D2-T1 D2-T1 D2-T1 D2-T2 D2-T15 D2-T26 D2-T39 D2-T40 D3-T1 D3-T14 D3-T25 D3-T42 D4-T1 D4-T12 D4-T14 D4-T22 D4-T30 D4-T35 D4-T46 D5-T1 D5-T2 D5-T9
Speaking Pointers 7 The "Cool" Factor 7 Voice Tone and Tonality 7 Pacing and Pausing 9 Energy and Enthusiasm 10 Language Tools and Details 12 Adjectives and Adverbs 12 Trance Words 13 Weasel Phrases 15 Embedded Commands 17 Linking 19 Easy-Linking (This, That, These, Those) 21 More Tools 23 Pointing and Gestures 24 Linking Gestures (Towards and Away) 25 Easy Linking Expanded (Pointing With This, That, These, Those ...) 26 Easy Anchoring - Point Or Touch, On Positive 27 Review 29 LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES Pace and Lead General Pace and Lead Techniques 31 31 32
* Disk and Track Numbers References to the CDs and the tracks on them are shown in a format such as "D2-T4", which in this example refers to Disk 2, Track 4.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Table of Contents (continued)
Page No. 3.1.2 3.1.3 3.1.4 3.2 3.3 3.3.1 3.3.2 3.3.3 3.3.4 3.3.5 3.4 3.5 3.6 3.6.1 3.6.2 3.7 3.7.1 3.7.2 3.7.3 3.7.4 3.8 3.9 4.0 4.1 4.1.1 4.1.2 4.1.3 4.1.4 4.2 4.2.1 4.2.2 4.2.3 4.3 4.3.1 4.3.2 4.3.3 4.3.4 4.3.5 4.4 4.4.1 4.4.2 4.4.3 4.4.4 4.4.5 4.5 4.5.1 4.5.2 Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects Pace and Lead-Mindset Or Frame Of Mind Pace and Lead - Current Reality Give Them a Reason Listing General Listing Listing - At The End Listing - Burying Items Listing, Pauses, and Emphasis.. Listing Review More and More Compare and Contrast Parts Parts of a Subject Parts of a Person Opportunities and Challenges Using Their Own Processes What Do People Want? Mini-Challenges Opportunities and Challenges Ambiguities Summary CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT Challenges Detailed and Specific Plans Are Just Not Workable Navigation Example Navigational Strategies Are Needed She Must Be Engaged In The Conversation! How Conversations Happen Conversational Dynamics Conversational Model Topic Turning Point General Conversational Management Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Want How To Steer Conversations, Moment To Moment The Model With Strategy and Tactics In Place Exercises and Assignments Summary Advanced Conversational Management Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Really Want Steering Conversations Moment To Moment The Model With Advanced Strategy and Tactics In Place Exercises and Assignments Summary More Advanced Conversational Management More About Getting The Conversation To Go Steering Conversations Using More Advanced 33 35 38 39 41 41 43 45 48 48 48 51 54 54 58 61 62 62 63 64 69 69 71 71 71 71 72 72 72 72 73 77 79 79 81 82 83 86 86 86 88 88 91 93 93 93 94 Disk a n d Track N o . * D5-T12 D5-T20 D5-T29 D5-T32 D6-T1 D6-T4 D6-T15 D6-T24 D6-T36 D6-T37 D6-T38 D6-T54 D7-T1 D7-T4 D7-T15 D7-T34 D7-T36 D7-T38 D7-T40 D7-T43 D7-T64 D7-T66 D8-T1 D8-T1 D8-T3 D8-T4 D8-T5 D8-T10 D8-T12 D8-T13 D8-T14 D8-T15 D8-T16 D8-T16 D8-T19 D8-T23 D8-T25 D8-T32 D8-T33 D8-T33 D8-T35 D8-T38 D8-T39 D8-T46 D8-T47 D8-T47 D8-T49
3 5.3 6. .1 4.2 5.0 6.5. .0 5.3 4.0 7.2 4.6 4.4 5.0 The Model With More Advanced Strategy and Tactics In Place. Do The Exercises. 94 96 96 97 97 98 99 99 99 99 101 101 102 104 109 111 115 115 115 116 116 119 119 119 119 119 119 121 Disk a n d Track N o . .SOTXs Conversational Model With SOTXs The Complete Conversational Model PATTERNS Pattern O v e r Pattern Formula Canned Patterns Pattern Riffing In Real-Time REVIEW AND SUMMARY Review Summary Listen. * D8-T52 D9-T1 D9-T2 D9-T3 D9-T5 D9-T6 D9-T7 D9-T8 D9-T9 D9-T10 D9-T11 D9-T14 D9-T15 D9-T24 D9-T32 D9-T33 D10-T1 D10-T1 D10-T7 D10-T12 D10-T13 D10-T18 D10-T18 D10-T26 D10-T27 D10-T28 D10-T29 D11 . 4.1 5.4 7. EXAMPLES v i e w ..7.3 4.7. .3 5.4 4.2 7.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course Table of Contents (continued) Page No.6.1 4.1 7.1 6. and Follow The Course Be Willing and Prepared To Put Energy Into Congratulations! Well Done! EXAMPLES. APPENDICES I II III Course "Cheat Sheet" Speaking and Language Tools "Cheat Sheet" The Complete Conversational Management Model 123 131 133 Page v .5 6. EXAMPLES.4 7.6.. .6.6..5 8.2 4.7 4.3 7.7.. Conversational Fractionation The 1-Shot Beeline Fallacy How Fractionation Works Using Conversational Fractionation Dead Ends Come Back To Life! Conversational Overview and Review Conversational Management Approach What If The Outcome Is Not What You Expected? Summary TOPICS Topics Of Enthusiasm and Passion Seduction Oriented Topics Expanded Seduction Oriented Topics .2 6.
a "sans-serif typeface). Graphics are used in the workbook as well. Exercises. . and conventions have been developed and are used throughout this transcript/workbook. Although there are paragraphs of explanatory text. and their use is key to many students' understanding of the concepts presented. i. The audio is NOT an exact duplicate of the text shown in the workbook. or major points in the workbook. This shows (for example) the Disk (3) and the Track number (5) that corresponds to that part of the workbook contents. Page vii .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course Formatting and Conventions The following formatting. a "serif typeface). If the graphic cannot fit there (due to page breaks) then the graphic is placed on the next available page. Italicized Text . The written text is NOT a transcript. A majority of the workbook is presented in an "outline" form. graphic captions. Boldface Text . and to make it easier to reference those items at a later time.that is simply to show a list of related items.e. or clarity. there is not an exact place in the book that correlates to the start of each and every track on the audio CDs.. and Assignments are all shown using this typeface (Arial. and the italics are simply used as a way to show a different manner of emphasis.As shown to the right Towards the right margin of section titles and headings.Boldface Text is used to emphasize certain text or passages. CD Location References are shown using terms such as "D3-T5" in the text. graphic titles. Listen to the audio where an example is presented. Since the work book is an "outline" and not a transcript. However these conventions are guidelines. these are in most cases presented as a way to augment the content of the audio presentation. The relationship between these two can be best described by considering the workbook text to be (for the most part) an "outline" of what is presented in the audio. Samples of the formatting and conventions used: Typefaces . and the Formulas. Usually the graphic is shown on the page immediately following where that graphic is first mentioned in the text.. D3-T5 CD Track References . Text within graphics. Italics are also used to point the reader towards specific content of the audio CDs. This shows information that could be considered part of an overall "outline" of what the audio presentation contains. There are certain conventions used in the formatting of the workbook.At times. The graphics in the latter sections are significant in that they are an essential part of the understanding and leaning. Not every track number is listed. items are presented in a list-like fashion such as this: • Item 1 • Item 2 • Item 3 • Etc.Italicized Text is used for emphasis in many cases where boldface text may by nearby. Lists . Therefore most of the track references are shown at the start of major sections. there may be instances when the conventions are not used for the sake of emphasis.A majority of the workbook content is shown in this typeface (Times New Roman. styles. It is also used for subject headings so that these stand out and apart from the normal text.
-2. This is shown below.1 .e. Each Formula is presented in its own "text box" as shown here. it is required in order for the "flow" of the book content to remain consistent.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Each graphic has a number and a title of some type.The workbook is laid out to minimize the amount of blank space where reasonably possible. This may require that a graphic be placed on the next page after where it is first mentioned (instead of being directly below where the graphic is first mentioned in the text). Similarly. and Assignments are shown inside boxes such as this. . Candidate Topics Figure XYZ-1: Graphic Title Sub-paragraph . -3) to account for multiple graphics in one section of text. Text Boxes . Exercises. Although this is not optimal. Formula.If a graphic has text that helps to further explain that graphic. Exercises are a series of instructions that call upon the reader to do or perform certain actions. For example. an Exercise may require interaction with other people. there are cases where text boxes may actually "break" across two pages. Assignments usually requier the reader to go out and interact with other person(s) in order to perform them correctly. The number is in the format of "XYZ-A" where "XYZ" denotes the number of the section where the graphic is placed. A Formula is a way to present a concise explanation of some item. This also may result in some page breaks being in places which are not optimal. Although the difference between Exercises and Assignments is maintained through most of the workbook. Page viii . and the "A" indicates the number of the graphic within a section itself (i. there are instances where the definitions may be clouded to some degree. Page Breaks . but that is a necessity due to the complexity of the book. then that text is shown immediately below the graphic using an indented paragraph such as this. or technique. fact. or maybe and Assignment can be done alone by the student. Most exercises can be done alone. Assignments also call for action on the part of the reader.Text boxes are used for very specific purposes in the workbook.
SP. those who have read what I have written. who have placed their trust in me and allowed me the experience of showing them new and wonderful possibilities for what their lives may have to offer. who was the business genius that brought Speed Seduction® to the masses through seminars and products. and MD.. associates. who helped me by allowing me to help them. To those in the original SD Lair group. the creator of Speed Seduction . SM.. To all of you. opening the door for many into the world of self improvement. I may miss a few sales because of such a delay. DM. Ross's developments have lead not only to helping many men with this part of their lives. . The main reason is that I do not wish to release any product until I believe that I am able to provide the level of quality. MC. and those who have entrusted me to teach you and to guide you. / must apologize to some degree for the time it has taken to finish this product. Working with these clients was especially instrumental in formulating and perfecting the concepts and teaching methods used in this product. colleagues. To the many experts out there who have augmented the SS teachings by showing me other aspects of the mind. and who has also contributed greatly to helping men change their minds about themselves.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Acknowledgements The first and foremost acknowledgement goes out to Ross Jeffries himself. Special thanks to my friends. and to help you in finding the Women or Woman of Your Dreams. but I sincerely hope that the results will prove to have made the wait worthwhile. and what is possible in their lives. confidants. Dave Riker Page ix . EVS. most notably Hypnotica. Thank you. and students (we are each all of these and more) in the TAGR Group. Yates Canipe. and this wait may have annoyed a few people.insight and teaching that I think is possible. To my coaching clients. JL. and have opened the door for me to find many ways of self-improvement and understanding. mentors. and for the assistance they provided with this product. and to all of the Students out there who I have met at Speed Seduction® seminars. but have also shown many the way to a new way of living. teachers. To Dr.
intelligent. And. that they will want to spend time with as well. And I am here to help correct it. for some reason seem to be in short supply. most women will be far better off and have much better chances with the kind of men. The women of the world will be better off in their own way. So. to make an informed choice. This is so sad. Many men through no fault of their own have grown up to be adults and have had little instruction or assistance in a very important area of their lives. and set forth upon a path to improve this area of his life. or don't know how to present themselves in the best way. There are many such men out there. learn. women. Whether a man decides to use this information as way to embark upon a period of his life which involves casual romantic interludes. They just have not been taught such things. the best men. are NOT in short supply. From that position. is up to him. Good. or the kind of man. and sharing experiences with them. that I create products such as this. and introducing themselves. A woman should never "settle". They are the ones that really don't know how to introduce themselves. or whether a man uses this information as a means to improve his chances of finding one special woman. and grow. One of the biggest tragedies of life is that there are things. I think that is not correct. interesting. and showing themselves in the best and most honest light. As if the interesting. other people. spending time with them. so that they really may share wonderful experiences of ALL types with women. Sadly this is most apparent when it comes to men. there are a lot of great men out there who would like to meet interesting women. are the ones that really DO look at this area of their lives. Page x . good-natured and well-intentioned man. Whether that be as friends or acquaintances. or with that special woman of which they have always dreamed. whether this time has any sort of romantic or seductive component or not. information. or "compromise". there are a lot of wonderful women out there who would love to meet interesting men. who was simply deprived of an means to "learn about" how to meet and talk with women. He will be able to decide for himself which he feels is the best option for him. the idea of simply communicating with and sharing experiences with the other half of the human population. should somehow not improve himself. And it's a shame for these women to be wanting for their company. she should decide to be with whom she wants to be with by having opportunities.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Forward One of the most wonderful things about life is the idea of connecting with others. I know of many women who are always distraught that they seem to not be able to meet good men. some of the most wonderful moments of life are brought about by people. in fact. Having many interesting men available. They don't know how to keep a woman's interest. It's for these men. helps to provide these women with an even better choice. as well. having and sharing experiences with. and decide to move forward. At least then he will be in a position of choice. teachings. take action. and in many cases the efforts of men to solve this problem on their own have been met by smallminded criticism and slander. I think that many men. and for those women. and options. Such men. (and more importantly a LACK of information in some cases) that can prevent such connections and moments from happening. charming men.
the benefits are meant to be for both men and women alike.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course So. So in my own way.. or Woman. Learn. my goal and my hope is that this product will make men. of your dreams. Have fun. even though this product is intended to be read. So guys . and women. and applied by men. Dave Riker Page xi . Get out there. Apply.. understood. somewhat happier and able to enjoy their lives even more than before. Study. read. And good luck in finding The Women.
some people do this naturally. Language Skills What works? What makes the successful guys able to use these technologies? Partly it's the ability to actually "talk" in this manner. and "reprogrammed" in a way.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 1.2 WHY IS THIS COURSE NEEDED? D1-T10 If you are here. but this will help you if you are not. If you are her "type" you don't need this. So even this "intro" section is starting to work for you. and get the full benefit of everything this course has to offer. Provide additional explanation of some points that are covered in the audio program. along with spaces for written responses where necessary. then on some level. pay attention. there is a need. Some guys don't need this. You are already on your way! This course works on many levels. Listen to it. You will have this way of speaking as a PART of who you are and what you can do! Guys need to be trained. If you follow along and do the exercises. you can change the way you speak as well. This program is based upon experience with countless students. We will teach you ways to easily manage conversations so that they go in interesting directions. Page 1 . 1. The purpose of this workbook is to: • • • Provide an outline of the material covered in the audio program.1 INTRODUCTION AND GETTING STARTED OVERVIEW Dl-Tl Welcome and Thanks. Present a series of exercises and assignments. seeing what is needed. These techniques all need to sound and be "natural" to actually be effective. and what works in the field. Conversational Skills The ability to manage conversations is needed as well. This workbook is meant to studied along with a series of audio lectures that are recorded on CDs. We will be teaching you the detailed language skills that will really help you. Welcome to Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course.0 1. consciously and subconsciously. and on you as well. You are not going to sound like this or talk like this all of the time! Just in the way that you shift and change how you speak now in different situations. to use these language skills naturally as just a part of the way they speak. you will do so in the future and use these techniques as well. Instructions for each are provided.
and how people speak. • Things may seem to "repeat". Not inside your head "thinking" about "how can I use this?"! 1.3 Major • • • • • • • • WHAT WE WILL HANDLE. This is a term that will be used throughout this course. many times! • In fact we have already started! Where Does This Material Come From • From SS Teachings.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course You have to be PROGRAMMED to do this so you can have a conversation. must react to a steady flow of new information without interruption. that is important.. respond to input immediately . some things will sound quite familiar. Sure. talking.. • Working on several "levels" of you mind at once • Models to arrive at an overall understanding • Left brain and right brain are both addressed • Conscious and subconscious minds are both given what they need for real understanding and retention. so let's define and explain it for you. but that's your left brain talking! We are reprogramming many years of your experience. but it's really YOU talking! Guys are too focused on "how can I use this" when in a conversation. Page 2 . for a while at least.Seduction Oriented Topics Patterns and Riffing Examples Dl-Tl5 What Methods Are Used • Describe and explain the details of the techniques • Explicit examples of how the details work • Examples throughout and within the discussions • Examples section at the end. responding.. listening. You need to integrate skills to the degree that they ARE a part of who you ARE. Other parts of the language tools you may have to "think" about." Guys need to stop the worrying about "Doing something wrong" It's only "wrong" if you are TRYING to do or be something you are not. listen. In a way. how it is learned. not a "trick". then you are not actually IN the conversation! You need to be engaged in a conversation.. • Exercises to develop understanding and skills • Assignments for you to do in the field. AND HOW Topics Speaking Pointers Language Tools and Details Conversational Management Conversational Fractionation Topics . some of the ways that you speak now will be reprogrammed so that speaking in a new way will be natural. Guys need to be able to just "do this" and "talk this way" in REAL-TIME. so we need to approach this in many ways.. and be a part of it. interacting.Enthusiasm and Passion Topics . but if you are "thinking" too much. Real Time "Occurring immediately .. • Other teachings about language.
or not? There are various ways. • Get some other written material to work with for this course. Changing that will take some time. The Mind-Momentum Principle At Work • Get energy. see what works for you. From working with clients and seeing what worked and how they were able to change. keep those copies to yourself.4 INVESTING IN YOURSELF. However. Applying a structured methodology of step-by-step methods. In addition. • Listen to other products in conjunction with this product. the more you will get out of it. The Ways To Study And Use The Product • Listen to the CDs. • Get that "Mind-Momentum" going to help you change and improve. and a few women's magazines as well. If you need to make your own copies for use in multiple locations. listening multiple times in any setting also has a lot of benefit. many of these people will be those negative types of people that will then dispute the benefits of this program! Why? Because THEY have not invested anything into it! Not just in terms of dollars.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • • • From personal experiences and how I used the materials. do whatever you need to do to listen to this course a LOT. do it! But please. • Having a good social life will help you. they aren't really putting themselves INTO it. However. you are doing just that. effort. both audio and written materials. Many of the assignments will deal with talking to people. and this is much easier if you have an active life where you can have many conversations. By embarking upon this course. However. OR NOT D1-T24 Any real change requires you to make an investment in yourself using energy. that YOU just DO. • This may seem complicated but the point is to get you SO familiar with the tools that you become the guy who does this! Some Very Important Points • Find all of your current SS products and inventory them. • Is there an "optimal way" to use the product. • Be prepared to have a place to practice for this course! You will need to be able to speak out loud to do many of the exercises. The best way to listen to this course is while also reviewing the workbook (especially in the conversational management sections). and engagement. to give you a real roadmap to actually learn the material. or revised? Yes. 1. So. • Follow along in the workbook if you can • Do the exercises and assignments! • Listen over and over. and who may "try" to listen to the course. but in terms of THEM really being willing and ready to change. effort. and being open to what benefits this program can bring. and engagement into your effort to really learn and use these materials. do the assignments over and over! • Be patient. Is this information. as assigned or as required. Other SS products will work well. You will need them because you will have assignments that deal with these. there IS some overlap and duplication with other products and systems. Page 3 . a concept that was brought up earlier. do the exercises over and over. Be wary of those people who may want to "borrow" a copy. the emphasis here is training you to do it for yourself. and this journey. If they just "try" it. We are reprogramming years and years of you "speaking" in a certain manner. Also maybe get a romance novel or two. the more you put into it. new. making it a part of YOU.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course People must be engaged in the process to get its benefits. • • • • • • • • This might be good as a learning TOOL. consequently. It's less effective. at every moment! Some people want to try to memorize. you heard it in context. Can we literally change the way you speak? • • • • • • • How you select words Create phrases Form sentences Pick topics Speak passionately. some structures. Most people want to approach this by learning bits and pieces • • That's good in a way. some models. there is no "right" way or "wrong" way. • • • • • • You will get some details. at will Engage in conversation Manage conversations Yes. then its easier. Those who are not. Don't let their lack of willingness to improve themselves. because you will hear it so much! But a LOT of what is being conveyed here is learning by EXAMPLE. you heard it. its a memorized "thing". its YOU being YOU! You cannot fail at being YOU! The approach in this course is different. Imagine having to "think about" how to talk. 1. will not benefit. sentences.5 CAN WE CHANGE THE WAY YOU SPEAK? D1-T26 Is this really possible? This sounds difficult. It Is Possible! . but only indirectly. And actual assignments. where you learn skills piece by piece. kids are taught about language. trying to "remember" what to say. But it's tough to do that. where you use the skills in the real world. you heard it a lot. You will end up "memorizing" thing to some degree. Also progressive exercises. paragraphs. about grammar. Plus it's not YOU talking. But that's not how you learned to talk! You learned to talk when you were a child . and you started to form the ability to speak and communicate based upon that! Page 4 ." So. there is a "right" and "wrong" way to do it! But if you are just TALKING. hold you back. Immersion is the key. Not as congruent. just being YOU. etc.by hearing others around you speak! You were IMMERSED in language. Then it's about a "performance. You keep trying to "remember" things. but to then USE it in conversation is difficult. How People Initially Learn How To Speak • • • • Sure in middle school.But This Is A Different Type Of Learning. because it addresses that analytical part of your mind. It makes guys nervous.
so that you will have more ability and more flexibility to do what is appropriate MANIPULATION AND ETHICS CONCERNS D1-T32 1. With THIS approach HERE. which we go over and over.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course This Course Uses Many Techniques To Train You To Have Workable. Examples • • Explicit examples. we will change the way you talk so that it will be easier. We will have you become familiar with the range of ways of speaking and sounding. based upon feelings that when using them. This causes some real. or craft. more a part of YOU.6 Many guys have been uncomfortable with using many of these skills. Real-World Skills. more natural. Page 5 . deep ethics issues and blocks many guy's success. how you communicate. trade. "it's not me" or "I am just using a trick or technique". like when I say "here is an example" Implicit examples. where I am just DOING these things all during the program. it's not about throwing something AT her. Exercises and Assignments to Teach You the Skills • Skills Training like any sport. and be more of WHO YOU ARE. • Break it down into small parts. Various Training Methods • • We use a lot of repetitive training methods so that these techniques have a better chance of becoming "automatic". and who and what YOU are! Using these skills will be less of an "act".
If this is a challenge for you.0 2. BORING. and even goes a bit over-the-top to really help you to understand what is being discussed. etc.2 Voice Tone and Tonality D2-T2 Listen to some examples of different tones of voice. Your tone of voice really conveys a lot about who you are. This is good as long as it's not BORING. and says a lot about you. even some of the materials from other products. That's the "allure". and read it aloud. The audio section demonstrates these options quite well. something you are interested in. but if you really want to work on this even more.1. 1) Take some of that reading material. We will work on this here in this course. to be cool. Too many guys "try" to be cool but actually come off as COLD or even worse. not out of nervousness. Examples: One way to think of this is to consider "where" your voice is generated from in your body. That "cool" feeling comes from being calm and speaking in a relaxed fashion. calm. Page 7 . but giving the impression that there IS more.1 SPEAKING AND LANGUAGE SPEAKING POINTERS The "Cool" Factor D2-T1 D2-T1 Guys want to sound "cool". reserved. but because it's appropriate to the situation. that there is a "fire" beneath the surface. a sense of being relaxed and calm • It also allows you to express some energy and excitement at different times. 2) Read some more of that material out loud. 2. how they make you feel.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 2. how calm you are.1. "Cool" comes from being calm and sure of yourself. how interesting you are. Listen as the examples demonstrate: • Speaking through the nose • Speaking through the mouth • Speaking from the chest Exercises for Speaking Pointers Grab some reading material of some type. how they sound. Cool does NOT mean to be boring and to put people to sleep while talking! The coolest people are the ones that are FUN to talk to and fun to be with! You don't have to be cold. Read several paragraphs. there ARE products that focus JUST on this area and you may want to invest in those. and what people like in general. focusing on generating your voice from your nose. do this for several minutes. and this time focus on speaking by generating the sound from within your mouth (or. That's what women like. focusing on the back of your throat might make this easier to do). there are great products and examples of this elsewhere.1 2. Why is this important? • Great voice tone conveys comfort.
comfortable. mouth. Can you recall how you spoke? Did the way you sound in that situation sound like any of the examples you just did? See the similarity? Assignments for Speaking Pointers These are your first real assignments in the course. Day/Time Who you spoke to Speaking from? How you felt.in the real world! To get the most benefit from this course. and where you are speaking from (your nose. with whom. where you were. See how relaxed it actually makes you feel and how you really need to BE relaxed to do this! 4) Take a moment. relaxed-confident). and really focus on having that voice generated from your chest. 2) In the next few conversations you have with people. Real-world experience will really help you to not just "know" the skills. Make notes below as to when it happened. 1) Over the next few days when speaking to anyone. make note of how you felt (nervous. really make a note to speak lower. Also. Relax. make a note to yourself as to how you are speaking. and whether or not you DID it! Day/Time Who you spoke to Situation (Where) Did you DO it? Page 8 . SOUND relaxed. Assignments are where you are given a real task to go out and do . it's important that you do what you can to REALLY make a point of doing these assignments.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course 3) Now read some of the material. and make them a part of who you are. and recall some time in the recent past when you were kind of nervous or fearful. but this time really focus upon generating the sound from deep within your chest. but to actually HAVE the skills. Make notes below for some of the conversations and see if you can see a correlation between these items. or chest). Focus on dropping your voice down from your nose/mouth.
Something you are interested in. and shows that the speaker is relaxed. Being able to vary your pacing and pausing can help a lot to convey a sense of intrigue and create interest. or don't quite understand the content.3 Pacing and Pausing D2-T15 Listen to the examples where some various pacing is demonstrated. comfortable manner. 4) Now read some of the material. deliberate. 1) Take some of that reading material and read it aloud. relaxed. 2. but go ahead and convey excitement in your voice! 3) Now read some of the material. as we discussed in the past section.1. or almost a sense of panic. but this time read it in a slow.) Assignments for Pacing and Pausing 1) Over the next few days when speaking to anyone. even some of the materials from other products. and charismatic presence. but this time read it slowly. and this time focus on reading in a quick and hurried fashion. There are many variations: Listen as these are demonstrated • Hurried showing nervousness • Hurried showing excitement • Slow as in hesitant and/or confused • Slow in a way that is deliberate and relaxed Exercises for Pacing and Pausing Grab some reading material of some type. Why is • • • this important? Correct pacing and speed of delivery conveys comfort. make a note to yourself as to how you are speaking in terms of your pacing and pausing. (Maybe even be aware of where your voice is coming from. Focus on reading in a very hurried fashion as if you are very nervous. powerful. Read several paragraphs and do this for several minutes. first very very fast. Too fast? Too slow? Hurried-nervous? Hurried-excited? Slow-confused? Page 9 . in a manner that makes you sound as if you are very confused. Speaking too quickly can show tension.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Strategic Formula for Speaking Pointers Use your best tone of voice (speaking from your chest) to convey a relaxed. and then far far too slow. 2) Read some more of that material out loud.
just make a note of this after-the-fact and write that down below.. Who cares? Why does this matter? • Most guys are just TOO BORING. you get stuck in fewer boring. enthusiasm. start to focus on changing your pacing and pausing. When someone else is being boring. 2.. to convey a more relaxed and deliberate manner. Make note of when. where.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course Slow-relaxed? You don't have to change it yet.4 Energy and Enthusiasm D2-T26 Listen to some examples of how this can sound . energy. If they do or say something that is interesting to YOU. then you can show more enthusiasm.. to convey a sense of drama and intrigue in what you are saying in a way that "captivates" people and makes them want to listen to you. By doing this. and excitement when appropriate.1. and well-placed pauses. and if you DID it! Day/Time Who you spoke to Situation (Where) Did you DO it? Strategic Formula for Pacing and Pausing Use variations in pace. Day/Time Who you spoke to What type of pacing and pausing? 2) For the next few days. Page 10 . YOU can show an appropriate amount of energy and enthusiasm. It's good to have the ability and range to display passion. dead-end conversations. • This also allows YOU to convey how interesting someone ELSE is as well. or bored. • If someone else is being interesting. who. YOU act boring.
. Again. which bores you. Page 11 . BE BORING and show no enthusiasm at all. how you listen. monotone voice.. whatever it is. go ahead and SHOW your enthusiasm! Be energetic in how you speak. 1) Watch and listen to some speakers talk about a boring. your car. your work. Read it OUT LOUD in an exciting. Do this for a good 10-15 minutes. and how much (or little) energy is conveyed. go ahead. taped lectures. bland. and how your respond. Exercises for Energy and Enthusiasm Grab some reading material of some type. Watch on either TV. 2) Watch and listen to some speakers who use a lot of energy and enthusiasm when they are talking! Really pay attention to how they speak. technical presentations. When you respond or talk back. 4) Get some written material that really DOES interest you. etc. whenever someone is talking about something boring. make sure it is something that YOU are passionate about. Note how even if the material is something you do NOT care about. 5) Take that written material that really does interest you. and read THAT aloud in a way that DOES show energy and enthusiasm! Make that sound as convincing as #4 above. Assignments for Energy and Enthusiasm 1) Over the next few days. do that for 10-15 minutes. even some of the materials from . energetic voice. Think as if YOU are convincing a group of people how great this is! Maybe your Dream Job of a lifetime is dependant upon YOU speaking well and showing how passionate YOU are about this! Do that for a good 10-15 minutes. 6) Take that earlier written material about the subject that you are NOT interested in and that really bores you.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course The audio section demonstrates more details about sounding boring/bored and also sounding as if you have energy and enthusiasm. maybe sports. bland voice with no energy or enthusiasm. Really pay attention to how they speak.. something you are interested in. monotone. and that are excited about. Strategic Formula for Energy and Enthusiasm Using energy and enthusiasm when speaking so that people can become energized and enthusiastic about listening to and being with you. 3) Get some written material that you have NO interest in. women. 2) For the next few conversations you have with people where you ARE interested in the subject. Read it OUT LOUD in a boring. their pace. their pace. and read that aloud in a boring. their tone. animated. and how much (or little) energy is conveyed. dry topic. other products. Again. do that for 10-15 minutes. that a good speaker can really grab your attention with their energy and enthusiasm. and BE BORING. their tone..
talk about it in a descriptive way. movies. talk about each thing or subject again.) 3) Read that text OUT LOUD.. Most guys are too dry in their speech. 4) Think of three recent conversations you had when you talked to someone about something that you REALLY liked. because to have to "think about" using them is almost impossible! • You need to be TRAINED TO USE THEM automatically. not the logical side of a person. use more Adjectives and Adverbs.2 LANGUAGE TOOLS AND DETAILS D2-T39 These are the Bit And Pieces • These are the sort of things that can be powerful. Re-live it. Adjectives will describe THINGS (nouns).Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 2. Page 12 . and stress the adjectives and adverbs in it. but must be done over and over. but this time. or they are too factual and leftbrained. Maybe say those adjectives or adverbs and put more energy into those words and emphasize them in some manner. boring. Examples • Car reviews • Movie Reviews • This course! Exercises for Adjectives and Adverbs 1) Find some written material that deals with something where people are speaking passionately about some subject. If you really like this subject. and more ways of talking about processes. 2) Read it. (Maybe highlight them in some manner. Who you spoke to Subject 5) Now.. whatever. Cars. Most men could be helped by having more descriptive speech. you should be able to do this for at least 3-5 minutes each. out loud. • Their use must be automatic. Note whom you were talking to. Day. These words modify or in some way describe. and sensations. while Adverbs will describe ACTIONS (verbs). Do this for each of the conversations listed above. Most Adjectives and Adverbs are qualitative. and make note of the adjectives and adverbs in it.1 Adjectives and Adverbs D2-T40 Listen to an example where many of these are used in descriptive language. sports. Remember. and uninteresting. and the subject you were talking about.2. they are not things that can be measured or specified. They sound cold. we are working to appeal to the emotions. nouns and verbs. It's good if YOU are also interested in it. feelings. 2. add more descriptive terms to it.
their emotional side. emotions. that you are passionate about. Strategic Formula for Adjectives and Adverbs Use more adjectives and adverbs in your speech to appeal to and excite the emotional side of the listener. and c above).2.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Assignments for Adjectives and Adverbs 1) Make note of the next 3 times you are having a conversation which deals with something that YOU are really into. b. Act like you are really having the conversation again. and processes awaken. and then maybe add some more as time goes on. factual. and with whom you spoke. Trance • • • • • Word List Instantaneously Suddenly Find Yourself Convince Yourself Suppose Page 13 .2 Trance Words D3-T1 Listen to an example where many of these are used. 4) The next several times any of those subjects come up in conversation. is listening and more engaged in the conversation. 2. 3) Practice out loud how you would have said those things in each of the three conversations. or objective manner. They are not "analyzed" in a conscious. Write down what the subject was. "paint a picture" with your words. that you really enjoy. Day Who you spoke to Subject 2) Write down a few adjectives and adverbs that you could have used in each discussion (refer to a. so that their feelings. Start with just a few of them. Trance words are words that "call upon" the subconscious mind in order for them to be processed and understood. Be descriptive. make sure to use some of those adjectives and adverbs in your descriptions. Trance words help to "open the person up" so that their subconscious.
and make it more interesting? Well. like advertisements. 4) Get your SS audio materials and listen for Trance Words (maybe even THIS course here). that's the point! Exercises for Trance Words 1) Make a full list of Trance Words. Think for a moment about using those trance words to describe that subject. Now speak OUT LOUD about that subject. Maybe refer to some of your other SS products and see how many more you can find. 6) Pick two subjects in which you are interested. and see how many of those Trance Words you can use. Looking at the list of Trance Words above. 3) Get out your written SS materials and look for Trance Words (maybe even use THIS course here). Doesn't that make it sound kind of "mysterious"? Maybe more exciting? Maybe you can take some normal. Look at the Trance Word List above. See how many you can notice. You can copy the ones you saw listed earlier. but also see if you can add some to the list. Highlight or circle the Trance Words in a few sections. talk OUT LOUD about that subject and see how many times you can use those Trance Words! Subject a. or school. Trance Word List 2) Watch or listen to some material where people are speaking passionately about something. See how many you can find and notice how they are used in context. Boring Subject Page 14 . sportscasters. something that you think is dull. 7) Pick a subject that bores you. 5) Take the written text from an SS product (maybe from #3 above) and read it out loud. Subject b. placing an emphasis on the Trance Words when you see them. With that list of Trance Words (above) in hand. see and hear if you can pick out when the speaker is using Trance Words. and see if you can pick these out. talk about it. or religious speakers.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • • Imagine Mysterious (-ly) Wonder (-ous) (-ously) Think of any subject. even something concrete like your job. work. Maybe play one tape or CD. Write them down below. almost boring or mundane thing. political speakers.
As you . because it may be a bit too forward? Well.3 Weasel Phrases D3-T14 Listen to an example where many of these are used. Use them when talking to different people. that's what Weasel Phrases are for! Weasel Phrase List (see if you can add to the list by listening to the audio). maybe even a bit odd? Maybe even a different topic or change of subject? Or maybe something that you were worried about bringing up. What's it like when . These also work as transitional phrases. Page 15 . • • • • • Have you ever ..2. How do you talk about something without REALLY talking about it? How do you bring something up that may be a bit different. Subject b. and using more and more as time goes on.... doesn't that make it-sound more "exciting".. Practice working with those subjects out loud some more and see if you can get even more comfortable using Trance Words when talking about those subjects.. to get from one subject to another.. If you were to . If I were to . and more fascinating? Assignments for Trance Words 1) Pick two subjects in which you are interested. The next time you are speaking with anyone about those subjects (in the real world guys!). 2.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Even though that may seem a bit strange. Strategic Formula for Trance Words Using Trance Words will help to get the subconscious mind of the listener to be more of a part of your conversation.. make a point to use at least one of the Trance Words in the conversation. 2) Integrate a few more of these words into your every-day description of those subjects. Just do whatever you can to start using some of them at first. more interesting.. Subject a..
Pick 3 of them that seem the most natural to you. Use different Phrases. the experience of it. that it makes more sense. Do this until you use all 4-5 of the attributes that you listed. and read some of this material out loud.) Pick 4-5 different aspects of this "experience" that you will talk about. Take a moment and try to emphasize them in a way. saying one slowly or quickly. and see if you can string things together so that they sound better. In a moment. This is necessary to have the kind of words and subjects that lend themselves to Weasel Phrases. Assignments for Weasel Phrases 1) Look at the list of Weasel Phrases that you wrote earlier. but selecting different Phrases to link the aspects together. For example. 2) Get your SS audio materials and listen for some Weasel Phrases. doing it.. 3) Take the written SS materials you had earlier. etc. 5) Did that sound weird? Strange? Ok . that seem as if they fit best into your way of speaking about subjects that you may like. after another. See if you can pick these out. While doing it.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Exercises for Weasel Phrases 1) Get some of your written SS materials and look for some Weasel Phrases in the text. It will get easier. then use another Weasel Phrase. (Weasel Phrases tend to provide ways to connect sentences and paragraphs that talk about how something is felt and experienced. see if you can use some or all of your favorite weasel phrases when talking about it. Just read the SS material out loud. etc. and do so with an awareness on some level that you are saying and using weasel phrases when they are in the text. getting into it. sensing it. the subject might be "going to a ball game" (pick your own. Maybe play one tape or CD. Try it again.. The next several times that you talk about that subject with anyone. make note of the weasel phrases. don't use that one!) Now talk about one of these 4-5 aspects for 1-2 sentences. Subject Page 16 . and then use one of the Weasel Phrases and the bring up another "aspect". we want you to talk about how it FEELS. Maybe pausing for a moment before one. 4) Pick a subject in which you are interested. 2) Note the subject that you used earlier for doing some exercises with Weasel Phrases (exercise 4 above). Talk about THAT one for a few sentences.
To make it easy. "get into it". instead "you like this" (car). issue a "command" or statement that instructs someone do something. its about multiple usage (bombardment)! Exercises for Embedded Commands 1) Get our your written SS materials (written) and look for embedded commands in a few pages of the text. Write down a list of embedded commands. intrigued. or "you want this" (car). Think of general statements. after another.2. 3) Take the written SS materials. excited by something.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 3) Select another subject that really interests you. Maybe play one tape or CD. Page 17 . allowing you to say more (and maybe more provocative things) about a subject. Make a point to "lean on it" a bit. Write down things that would make someone interested. Again not "you like that color". "get excited". etc. or more quickly. • Context . Pick something that excites you! Maybe the subject is sports. 2.. See if you can pick out embedded commands while listening. 4) Pick a topic that YOU are very interested in. These are not to be sexual or suggestive. Just say this stuff out loud. a place you have traveled. These are small snippets of words and phrases which. think of it like this. "see how fascinated" . etc. and to "soften" the way in which something is said. maybe pausing for a moment before one.). feelings.It's not just about using one. once. saying one slowly. and read some of this material out loud.just general things that would cause a person to be interested in something. lets say you were selling something to someone. and do so with an awareness. that you are saying and using embedded commands at the time. While doing it. on some level. maybe a car. when separated from the context. things you would like a listener to think about. and incorporate Weasel Phrases into the next several discussions you have about that subject as well. Two key aspects of the use of Embedded Commands are often overlooked. and where the person's emotions or feelings are somehow active (This "context" issue is discussed later in the product in great detail in Conversational Management sections. 2) Get your SS audio materials and listen for these. feel.. Take a moment and try to emphasize them in some way. that you want them to experience. Subject Strategic Formula for Weasel Phrases Use Weasel Phrases to keep the conversation going. or feel a certain way. Like "feel excited". or experience while they are thinking about that subject. your job. make note of the embedded commands.It's very important that the command be brought up in the context of a conversation that is interesting. but just general things (feelings or states). your car.4 Embedded Commands D3-T25 Listen to an example where many of these are used. "this is what you have imagined having for yourself. • Repetition .
Strategic Formula for Embedded Commands Use embedded commands repeatedly and in the proper context. changing your voice. out loud. but something where being influential may help. just enough to put the emphasis on the command. Assignments for Embedded Commands 1) Look at the list of Commands that you wrote and practiced that deal with a subject in which you are interested (exercise 4 above). Start to place some emphasis on the command itself. but now focus more on "leaning" on the embedded commands a bit. start using a few of these commands when speaking. 6) Do the same thing again. make some effort to use some of these commands in the context of a real discussion. Subject Embedded Commands 3) Practice the use of those commands. pausing. Page 18 . 2) Select another subject that is a part of your life. or maybe it has to deal with your job. Maybe you work in sales. see just how many of the embedded commands in that list that YOU can say! First. Maybe slowing down slightly. See how natural you can make them sound. The next several times that you talk about that subject with anyone.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 5) Start talking about that topic out loud. and make it sound natural. or school. to create a compelling will on the part of the listener follow you and listen to you. Write down a list of at least 5 commands that work well in that subject. that would assist you in being more influential. 4) The next several times that subject comes up in your life. Maybe it's not a passion or real interest. work on just saying them and finding a way to bring them up. and with that list that YOU wrote in hand. in the context of talking about that subject.
Linking Phrases .2. you are talking "about" a feeling or sensation. the linking tools and techniques will add to this. Are you talking about the "feeling" she had at some time in the past? Are you talking about the feeling she is having right now? • Because you are using terms like "this". on some level. While doing so. For example. 2) Get your SS audio materials and listen for these.) Page 19 . recall. while looking at you. which is an ambiguous way of referencing what she is thinking about. • • • • • • • Now with me In me In myself with this these this belief these feelings Exercises for Linking 1) Get our your written SS materials (written) and look for examples of Linking in the text. if you are talking about a great feeling of excitement that a woman has had or is having. Just to "process" what is being discussed. then to the deeper levels of her mind. she has to feel it on some level (and she will. when you say "this feeling". What is this based upon? • When talking. make note of where linking is taking place. Maybe play one tape or CD. you become more associated with those feelings. • In order for her to understand the feeling being discussed. then on some level that is creating this "link". non-specific. she has to actually feel it to some extent. etc. and experiences that are being discussed and associate or "link" them to you.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 2. emotions. using some of the techniques that have been discussed in this course (pausing. as long as there is good rapport). See if you can pick out Linking Phrases while listening. and then making an ambiguous reference to that feeling using your words. you are being ambiguous.While listening to the audio. change in voice tone. and talking to you. However. "in myself. and feel emotions. Take a moment and try to emphasize the linking in some way. 3) Take the written SS materials. and getting her to experience.5 Linking D3-T42 Linking is a way to take the feelings. you speak of "this feeling". If she is experiencing these feelings in your presence. ALL of those possible definitions apply! Then. • However. and inexact. You can also make reference to "in me". The most common linking phrase/tool that guys think about is the phrase "now with me". will "link" them to you. and read some of this material aloud. etc. it's easier than you think! Just talking about a subject and getting her to be a part of the discussion. also "this" and "these" as in "this feeling" of "these feelings". "this interest". see if you can add more phrases to the list below. and make this "link" even more effective. In some ways. which is ambiguous (non-exact).
6) Now do the same thing again. This will sound easier for you as we go on. A quick way of doing this is to simply add "this feeling". First. Another example would be to take the phrase "Get excited" and turn that into "get excited by THESE things". Maybe slow down slightly. "these feelings". or change your voice.) For example. see just how many of the Embedded Commands and Linkage Phrases that you can use in your dialog. Plus the next section will make this much easier! Strategic Formula for Linking After getting someone to experience good feelings and emotions. "this person or thing". with me" after one of more of the commands in your list. In some manner. link them to you so that YOU become something and someone that they feel good about. etc. (Again.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course 4) Take the list of embedded commands that you created in an earlier exercise (Exercise #4 in section 2. That's ok. just enough to put emphasis on the Linkage Phrase. this will come to you much more easily. Doing linking in an exercise like this is difficult and hard to make it sound "natural". You can even add the ever-popular "now. As you hear more and more examples of this throughout the course. Page 20 . it's much better if picked up along-the-way. work on just saying them and finding a way to bring them up.2. Write down the list of commands and an associated linkage phrase for each below. the linking is ambiguous and doesn't reference you directly. you could say "feel excited by this" or "feel excited now" (you can also link things by putting in a reference to NOW).4). and see if you can "add" text to each to link them to you in some way. but now focus more on "leaning" a bit on the Linkage Phrases. where you listed "feel excited". pause. Start talking about that topic out loud. and using the list above. This may seem strange and sound a bit "off".4). Embedded Command Linkage Phrase 5) Pick a topic that YOU are interested in as we did before (it can be the same one you used in Exercise #4 in section 2. Assignments for Linking No separate assignment for this.2.
they reference a "thing". that person • This direction. "this person" tends to sound like the person that is there. Those) D4-T1 Listen to an example where many of these are used. or not there at the time. this & that are singular • This . This is a new and very effective way to do linking that is easy to learn and master. So.Non-Possessive For example. that feeling • This sensation. This means they are ambiguous! Consider this and that. • These people. These. for that multiple-instance bombardment that we spoke of before! The idea of linking wild. • This person. and it can be done a LOT. those directions • These feelings. those people • These directions. but do so in a general manner. in general.6 Easy-Linking (This. Whereas "that person" refers to someone "away" some "other" person who is not in the immediate area. a GREAT strategy is to link anything and everything positive to you (and link negative things away from yourself.Possessive • Those . seductive feelings to you may be great but. those feelings • These sensations. In this case. but that will be quite obvious when you try to do that). That. so you are not using a name or specific reference. and "that" is not.2. one "thing". these refer to plural items. and included. with you. that sensation They differ though in that "this" seems possessive. and one is not. those sensations So. exciting. For example. (In some cases. with "these" being the possessive form. This and that tend to refer to singular items. Consider four words in the English language: • This • That • These • Those These are forms of pronouns. who cares? Well these are almost interchangeable! You can switch this/that in sentences as you wish. Given that one type is possessive. that direction • This feeling.Non-Possessive (seems to reference something "else" or something "away") Consider these and those. So. there are times when they cannot be switched. use the possessive form when saying or talking about ANYTHING POSITIVE and use the non-possessive form when saying anything negative! Page 21 . these and those are plural • These .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 2.Possessive (sort of "includes" something) • That .
you have discussed a subject (and written a lot of text about it) that is important to you. Exercises for Easy-Linking 1) Say the lines below. Those people are not. or "things about" that subject. These people are good. and those depending on whether the item is positive or negative. That. or singular/plural. for a good ten minutes. write a small sentence for each. That person is not.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • • • This That These Those Singular possessive Singular non-possessive Plural possessive Plural non-possessive Anything Anything Anything Anything Positive Negative Positive Negative You can learn to do this (to choose which of these words to use) in real-time through training! Tactical Formula for Easy-Linking Use "This" and "These" when referring to anything positive. That. For each of these attributes or things. ' 3) Earlier in the workbook. Subject: Attributes or "things about" that subject. Write down (below) ten attributes. out loud. That is not. These. using the correct versions of That. 2) Say the lines below. for a good ten minutes. This person is good. Those Page 22 . These are good. Small sentence that includes that attribute. Those are not. and the correct form of This. These. Use "That" and "Those" when referring to anything negative. This is good. out loud.
beyond the small bits and pieces of language. Small sentence that includes that attribute. These. and use as many of the sentences (above) as you can while talking. D4-T13 Page 23 . Subject: Attributes or "things about" that subject. 5) Pick another subject. 2. and use as many of the sentences (above) as you can while talking. and the correct form of This. and once again.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 4) Talk out loud about that subject for a good 5-10 minutes. list ten attributes or things about that subject.3 MORE TOOLS D4-T12 Now we are getting into a different area. That. These. Great speakers use movement to their advantage. These sections help to train you in these types of techniques. That. and Those. Anchoring Anchoring is associating a feeling or emotional state to a sensory experience. and their movement becomes a part of their communication. Those 6) Talk out loud about the subject mentioned above for a good 5-10 minutes. using the appropriate form of This. and then write a small sentence for each.
Move! We will start by generating SOME movement.1 Pointing and Gestures D4-T14 Good speakers use their hands. and way from your sides. 2) List 3 subjects that you really enjoy. have energy. towards. embedded commands. However we will focus on things that can create a LOT of effectiveness. and away from yourself. Then later on see if you can start to become aware of what your hands are doing WHILE you are in the conversation. and that you are passionate about. and to do multiple times. etc. and then we can work on deliberate movement such as • Pointing towards and away from things • Towards yourself and away from yourself Exercises for Pointing and Gestures 1) Find a good speaker on TV. make note of where your hands are when speaking. Read some of that text (from an earlier exercise) out loud. Use your hands to accentuate certain points. maybe a motivational speaker. etc). and that are very very easy to do. and hopefully the conversations are interesting. after the conversation has ended. down. passionate. Subjects Page 24 . to help make their point. talking about a subject that YOU are interested in. Get your hands OUT of your pockets and AWAY from your body! Act excited. Most guys are too boring and too reserved when talking. point up. 2) Get one of the text lists from an earlier exercise (weasel phrases. or even a preacher. Watch how they move. We will break down many of the component parts of this into skills that we will teach you bit by bit. and some gestures.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Many different types of anchoring can be done and we are only going to cover some very basic tools. 2. political speaker. They may be a bit over-the-top (speaking to an audience is different than speaking one-on-one) but just watch them for a while. so these techniques discussed here will help. BE excited! Use your hands and arms for emphasis. etc. Assignments for Pointing and Gestures 1) For the next few days. How to • • • do this: Get your hands out of your pockets. and that you end up talking about with people quite often. How often are they in your pockets? How often do they just lie by your side and never move? Make note of this after-the-fact. so that the use of these becomes automatic. Don't flail about wildly. Pick something YOU are interested in.3.
and once again. and Those. and the correct form of This. and their movement becomes a part of their communication. Subject: Attributes or "things about" that subject. Small sentence that includes that attribute. These. That. These. That. beyond the small bits and pieces of language. and use as many of the sentences (above) as you can while talking. using the appropriate form of This. 2. Great speakers use movement to their advantage. Those 6) Talk out loud about the subject mentioned above for a good 5-10 minutes. list ten attributes or things about that subject. D4-T13 Page 23 . and use as many of the sentences (above) as you can while talking. 5) Pick another subject. Anchoring Anchoring is associating a feeling or emotional state to a sensory experience.3 MORE TOOLS D4-T12 Now we are getting into a different area. and then write a small sentence for each.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course 4) Talk out loud about that subject for a good 5-10 minutes. These sections help to train you in these types of techniques.
just start to MOVE. but this time use your hands. make a point to get your hands OUT of your pockets. Bad (gesture towards. and to send negative things "away" from yourself. gesture. Tactical Formula for Linking Gestures Whenever you say something negative. away. and when anything negative is mentioned. Bring Positive things toward yourself.2 Linking Gestures (Towards And Away) D4-T22 This is a fast and easy way to link positive states to you. gesture. arms. point away. towards. and every time something positive is being talked about.). very easily. motion. Bad. away. Whenever you say something positive. and AWAY from your sides and MOVE when talking about these subjects. point or gesture away. or at least be able to move. point or gesture towards yourself. point towards yourself. many people move when talking This technique is most powerful when used at a time when emotions and/or imagination are engaged in the conversation. Good. This technique allows you to do this many many times. and animate to some extent the next time you talk about them. 3) With these three subjects in mind. recall a recent time when you had such a discussion. Do something. and the repetition works for you! • Can do in various contexts.. etc. Do your best to re-enact that discussion (say what you said. and send Negative things away • You can point towards or away from yourself. and accentuate what you are saying in order to be more compelling as a speaker and to get even more attention from your listener or audience. • Or hold your hand away from yourself (to send things "away") How to use it • Good to do in the context of being a person that already MOVES when talking! • Make this subtle.. and MOVE! Do this out loud. or • You can place your hand on your chest or abdomen in a subtle manner (to link things to you) . and MOVE. Page 25 . Strategic Formula for Pointing and Gestures Move. Exercises for Linking Gestures 1) Stand up. As you get more comfortable with this.) 2) Grab some of your written SS materials.3. ANYTHING. make a note to go ahead and move. Say the following out loud while gesturing in the correct direction: Good. etc. and others. Read that out loud.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course For each of these subjects. 2. no need to WILDLY gesture! • You can do this many many times.
Those" correctly Combine these and use them at the same time! When you say This or These. but you don't have to do it every time! That will seem strange! Tactical Formula for Easy Linking Expanded Positive statement. Do the following out loud: Page 26 . That. motion away or place your hands/arms away. 2. Assignments for Linking Gestures 1) List 3 subjects that you really enjoy. That. 2) With these three subjects in mind.3. these can be the same as the last set of assignments). (yes. passionate.3 Easy Linking Expanded (Pointing With This. and every time something positive is being talked about. start with a few. but this time when you are speaking of anything good or positive. say what you said. points towards yourself. When you say These or Those. point away. Subjects Do your best to re-enact that discussion.. point away. Pick something that YOU are interested in. or at least sit where you can move. For each of these subjects. These. when anything negative is mentioned. Point to you Negative Say "those". and that you end up talking about with people quite often. and MOVE. point towards yourself and when anything negative is mentioned. Say "these". Do this out loud. Linking Gestures and Easy-Linking together: • • • Use the pointing/gestures on Positive and Negative things (point towards and away). Those . gesture towards yourself or place your hand(s) on yourself. recall a recent time when you had such a discussion. Exercises for Easy Linking Expanded 1) Stand up. Say "this". make a note to go ahead and use these Linking Gestures to some extent the next time you talk about them. Point away.. etc.) D4-T30 Now we bring together Linking Gestures and Easy Linking. it will become easier and easier. Point away Positive statement. These. have energy. Conversely. etc. This is veryeasy to do over and over for that repetitive effect. Say "that". and hopefully the conversations are interesting. Use "This. Start subtle. Point to you Negative statement.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 3) Remember the text we used in an earlier example here in the workbook? Read that out loud.
4 Easy Anchoring . 2. a laugh.. These. states. Strategic Formula for Easy Linking Expanded Combine the use of Linking Gestures (towards yourself when positive. These. specific states. we are doing that already by pointing "towards" on positive things and "away" on negative things using Linking. and Those. a realization. That. On Positive D4-T35 Let's look at anchoring in light of the 80/20 rule (where 80% of the results come from 20% of the effort). Those in the correct ways) to associate even more positive feelings. touch them! This "Easy Anchoring" works in any context: • they laugh. Point away. If you are head-on directly in front of a person. But to get even more effectiveness when anything positive happens. or when the person you are talking to goes into a Positive state. These.. trying to add in more instances of This. Also. Do this in a way that maybe makes it seem like you are doing it for emphasis.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Point to yourself. Can we apply this to anchoring? Yes! • We need a way to do some basic anchoring that is very simple. and Those if you can. while pointing towards or away from yourself in the correct manner. and say "that". That. The more that "emotions" are being accessed. touch them • they seem to go into a pleasant state. it's very useful to Anchor anything and everything positive to you! In some ways. and thoughts to you but in a general sense. and away when negative.Point or Touch. it's more difficult. touch them This is best done in a "moment" with some emotion. and able to be done many many times. Practice it enough and in connection with earlier exercises. the more effective it tends to be.) with Easy Linking (using This. and say "this". etc. you are anchoring them in a subtle way. This is more easily done if you are standing at the side or at an angle. Point away and say "those" Repeat! This WILL help to train you! 2) Remember the text we used in an earlier example? Speak that text out loud. but actually. Use the correct versions of This. touch them • they smile.3. Point back to yourself and say "these". That. an expression. it's good to be close enough (within arms-length) so that the "touch" is easy to do. Page 27 . and emotions to yourself. It may be good to anchor feelings. it will become automatic.
Assignments for Easy Anchoring 1) The next several times you shake someone's hand. directly to you. Tactical Formula for Easy Anchoring When the person you are talking with displays a positive feeling of some type. but a bit more "deliberate". you grab their upper arm as well. (Not romantically. touch them to help anchor it to you. etc. make a point to hold it just slightly longer than usual. maybe pat on the back. • Think about when you meet and are introduced to someone. without really thinking about it. just a touch. you just touch his or her upper arm or upper back. Exercises for Easy Anchoring 1) Think about the last 5 times where you touched someone in this type of way. A laugh A moment of recognition or realization When someone starts talking quietly. but in many cases.. vividly. See if you can recall how it was. This is the same type of thing. a smile...) Maybe a handshake Maybe a pat on the back Maybe a funny gesture Make a note of the person. also make a point to make and maintain eye contact as well. 2) Spend some time looking for moments (positive ones) where a touch would be appropriate. but yet have some degree of rapport already (maybe this is a friend-of-a-friend. Also note the degree of eye contact. or Topic being discussed 2) Recall those 5 times. Write those down. • When joking with someone. Page 28 . and note to yourself the correlation between how long the touch lasted and the level of rapport.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course You probably do this already in certain situations. intrigue. laugh. interest. such as. and the situation or topic being discussed. Person '" Situation. • Think about when you greet a friend. maybe someone who you have heard about). What do you do? You shake their hand.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course At first. 2. to be cool o Voice Tone And Tonality • Nose. 3) Now that you have started to notice these "moments" where a touch would be appropriate.. Those MORE TOOLS o Pointing And Gestures • Move! Point! o Linking Gestures • Towards And Away o Easy Linking Expanded • Pointing With This. in-the-moment. when you have the chance. and you have already learned a LOT of the detailed speaking.. Chest o Pacing And Pausing • Slow. These.. Mouth. think "I could have touched them THEN". Suddenly. • SPEAKING POINTERS o The "Cool" Factor • You don't have to be cold. we want you to actually DO IT! So. Find Yourself o Weasel Phrases • If I were to . and movement skills that will be used later in the course. but as you notice these moments.4 REVIEW D4-T46 We are well on our way.. These. Those Page 29 . see if you can have at least 5 instances of knowing. That. language.. anchoring and associating yourself to positive and intriguing feelings in other people helps to make them feel positive towards and intrigued by you. Fast • • • Pause o Energy And Enthusiasm • Passionate or Boring? LANGUAGE TOOLS AND DETAILS o Adjectives And Adverbs • Be descriptive o Trance Words • Instantaneously. DO IT! Strategic Formula for Easy Anchoring In general. o Easy-Linking • This. o Linking " with me. You are noticing this after-the-fact. That. maybe you don't touch them. that a touch is appropriate. o Embedded Commands • Can you do this now. Then.
we will move onwards to work on Language Structures. Page 30 .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course o Easy Anchoring • Point Or Touch On Positive And Negative With these parts behind you. and later to Conversational Management techniques.
These techniques give you ways to use and arrive at languaging in a manner that will make you more persuasive. incorrect. Changing Topics and Subjects .Some people try to display higher knowledge or value by "arguing". You might disagree.. it's best to meet or join someone in some way. or to try to "impress" them. The minute you do anything like that to get someone else's "approval".. To "Pace" means to just BE a part of the conversation. Agree or not agree? .Can you just abruptly jerk a conversation towards where you want it to go? Maybe. you might bring up a new way of looking at it.. all of the time. You MAY be able to do that. and more influential in general. telling someone they are wrong. but will hopefully at some point. you might make comments (some that agree and some that may not) but the key is that you are "Taking part in" the conversation and topics at hand.1 PACE AND LEAD D5-T2 Pace and Lead . Now we are moving "up" a level..0 LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES D5-T1 We have been working on bits and pieces of language. or "bigger chucks" as we say.. Challenges • Can't you just bluntly offer a different view? Yes.A way to change directions • In someone's way of thinking • In the conversation To make a change in direction in some manner. Pace and Lead allows us to "join" someone.. you are lost. It can mean this. o That's one way to see it o I understand your point Page 31 • • . You almost NEVER impress people that way! To pace/lead well. Changing the Viewpoint or Frame if Mind . etc. things that you should not even have to really "think about". move with them conversationally for a while. For example. and then take them in some direction. but agreeing is just a special case..Can you just knock someone into agreeing with you? Can you be that bold? Yes. Don't argue! . 3. however you can break rapport.Some people misunderstand and think that to "Pace" means to "agree".. Are they useful and possible? • • • Trying to knock or jar someone into a different direction or way of thinking can be risky. show understanding (does not have to be agreement necessarily) and then . but you need a lot of power to do it and you risk breaking rapport. the sort of things that you need to get used to doing automatically. but you must do so powerfully and do NOT look for "acceptance". Fast and abrupt changes . say things such as. acknowledge what the other person is saying. into higher-level stuff.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 3. move them . These were tactical details. be able to just "do". towards where you want things to go. then and give them another way of looking at it. but you can break rapport in the process.
) • Yes. Maybe • • • • • • continue showing an understanding or interest So what you mean is . Ok.it's like this. showing that you are a part of it. • Well. a way that you want. if you attempt to do that.. Let them know you are listening and understand (using wording such as shown below.. Impressing someone with your knowledge. Then start to move or shift things in a different way. That hardly ever works.. and then moving things forward in some manner. So. • Ok . I read/saw/heard the same thing . allowing you to move things more in your favor later on..BE IMPRESSIVE! People really don't like to be proven dumb or wrong! Most people are offended or "put off by such attempts. So if I understand this ... I get it.. Strategic Formula for Pacing and Leading Pacing and Leading allows you "be" in the conversation for a while and gain rapport and information. 3. the implication is that you NEED someone's approval.... Arguing! Many smart guys study these techniques and technologies.. I see • That's interesting • I get it • Hmmmmm .. and/or interest. To TRY to IMPRESS is bad.. Tactical Formula for Pacing and Leading Show agreement... • Alright.. as if you "need" their approval.... .. Page 32 . acknowledgement.. Instead . Then start to direct things in a different way . understanding.1. it makes YOU look bad. I also think you can see ..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course o o That's interesting I see what you are saying.. In addition.1 General Pace and Lead Techniques D5-T9 Here are some examples of ways to do these steps with example wording for each. The point here is not to memorize these "lines". Let me make sure I understand .. or... have you thought about this . what you are saying is ... but to really get a sense of being IN the conversation. and some of then want to go out and "impress" people with their newfound knowledge..
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
I hear you, and what else is interesting is .... •-. That's a good way of looking at it, something else that is important is ....
The Formula for Pacing and Leading is ... acknowledge and then start to shift things ... Maybe you want to shift things more and/or bring up another issue or viewpoint entirely (or maybe you actually disagree) • That's one way of looking at it, however I think ... • Yes, I understand, I have also heard ... • Ok, that makes sense, another way of thinking about it is .. • Alright, but on the other hand... Some general methods you can use to introduce the "leading" aspect, you can talk about... • What you know, believe, understand • What a friend or colleague has said • What you heard • What you read • etc. 3.1.2 Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects D5-T12
Lets say you find some people talking about a topic. Do you walk up, interrupt, and start an entirely new topic? No. (Well, you can, but that takes a lot of power and has a lot of risk.) A better way is to enter the conversation, talk about it (Pace), and then move the conversation into areas that you want it to go (Lead). Examples: • You are in a conversation and the topic is cars. People are talking about prices, loans, etc. You acknowledge what is being said, contribute to that conversation (pace), and then start to bring in the idea of how a car handles, how it feels, and how exciting it is to drive certain cars (lead). • People are discussing clothes, various brands, types, etc. You talk about that with them (pace) for a while, and then start to bring up the idea of how clothes make you feel, how you feel differently when wearing different things ... etc (lead)
Tactical Formula for Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects Show agreement, understanding, acknowledgement, and/or interest in the topic or subject. Then start to move or shift topic or subject in a different way, a way that you want.
Exercises for Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects 1) Think about some recent conversations you have had with people about different topics, hopefully these conversations and/or this topic is something that occurs a lot for you (based on interests you have, people you know, etc). Recall a specific "moment" in each conversation. Note what was being discussed, and what point was being talked about. Make a note of each of them. Also note, where did that actual conversation go next?
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course What were you talking about in this "moment"?
Conversation with whom?
Where did it go next?
2) Pace and Lead Gently Out loud, practice as if you were talking in each of the discussions above, and paced the conversation and topic, and then lead it in some direction. In this exercise, simply show agreement, understanding, and/or interest, and then lead in the same general direction. Maybe bring up a new example, new point, new issue, but just sort of "take over" the conversation. 3) Pace and Lead in a New Direction Next, for each of those instances, provide an example where you show agreement, understanding, and/or interest, but now start to "move" things in a new direction. Maybe the conversation that you had started at this one "point" and went in a specific direction ... Now, for this exercise, practice taking it in a new and different direction. Maybe introduce a different aspect of the topic or subject, something not mentioned before, or not normally talked about. The key is to first show agreement, understanding, and/or interest and THEN do this "shift", and you LEAD things in a different way.
Assignments for Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects 1) Make note of three conversations that you tend to have with people on a regular basis. Person or People Subjects we discuss
2) The next times these conversations happen, make a point to "Show agreement, understanding, and/or interest" (Pace). Then "Then start to move things" (Lead) in your own way, Do this by introducing a different aspect of that topic, or a related topic/subject. Don't make this shift or change really abrupt or different, just make a point to sort of "direct" where things move, even if that direction is close to where it was going anyway. Just make sure YOU are the one that moves it. Note the text and examples given earlier as a way to do that. 3) Once you can do the above, now make a point to have your "Lead" incorporate a real change of some type.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Normally, even without your input, the conversation tends to go in a certain way. The earlier exercise had you just keep thing moving in that same direction. Now you are to "take" the conversation somewhere else towards a different or related topic. Just introduce a new aspect of the topic, a different thing, a different direction, so that you are really "leading" where things go. Remember the language that you were shown earlier. Use languaging like... You know what ELSE is interesting You know what * l * have found (seen, felt) Another way of doing this would be .. You know what ELSE can happen ... is ...
Pace and Lead-Mindset or Frame of Mind
You can change the way people look at things, their mindset, and their "frame of mind". For example, imagine you are having a discussion and people are talking in a certain "frame of mind" (not directly, it's just their way of seeing things). The point here is to acknowledge that frame, and then introduce another way of seeing things, another "frame", or another "mindset". What is • • • • a "frame"? In general it's ... A way someone "sees" something. What it "means" to them. The way they "feel" about it. The significance or meaning that it has.
Looking at the formula for Pace and Lead, you apply that by first acknowledging the current Frame, and then start to lead by bringing up another way of thinking about it and/or looking at it. You bring a new "frame" into the discussion. (This is a way of shifting that way people LOOK at things, the significance that it has, or their mindset regarding certain topics or behaviours). In the earlier example of Pacing and Leading of Topics and Subjects, we were talking just about a thing, a topic, or subject. Now we are talking about a feeling, or the way things are "seen" or what they "mean". For example, people may be talking about: • Taking risks • Feeling good or bad • Having a good day or a bad day • Making choices • What an event "meant" to them • How someone else actions affected them • How a decision affected them. There is a "frame" (of mind) behind each of these discussions and with proper technique, that frame and mindset may be changed. Look back at the "Methods" section earlier for some details and examples of how to introduce this pacing and leading (there are some lists of languaging examples provided). Examples: • You enter a conversation where people are talking about risks, Risks at work, risks in finances, risks in life. You Pace by discussing this for a while. The frame or mindset here is that risks are bad, dangerous,
etc.. a new meaning.. (You are shifting her frame so that she may start to look at different things in men.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course have consequences. understanding. or may be perfect but with the wrong hair color (lead).Mindset or Frame of Mind Show agreement.Mindset or Frame of Mind 1) Think about some recent conversations you have had with people about different topics.. In this exercise simply Show agreement. the assumption? What is the frame of mind behind the viewpoints that they had? Write down the topic. understanding. Then start to move or shift the frame by introducing another way of looking at things. and the "frame" that was in use.. the people. With whom? Topic? Mindset / Frame of Mind 2) Pace and Lead Gently Practice as if you were talking in that discussion. who is like 5 lbs overweight. Again. some men will just "write off a woman that is a certain size. The frame you are bring up is how superficial it is to judge based on numbers and details. weight. Towards a way that you want. she talks about what their professions are. Do this OUT LOUD. some risks make you feel alive.. • Another conversation has a woman talking about what she looks for in men. Just sort of "take over" the conversation. Page 36 . Exercises for Pace and Lead . then start to move into talking about how men do this as well. Note what was being discussed. and paced it.. and what "kind" of man she likes (height... some risks have good rewards. and how anyone of quality . looks for more. and then lead it in some direction. What was the "frame". You agree on some level (pace) and chat about that. Make a note of each of them. then lead in the same general direction. etc. Maybe bring up a similar way of looking at it. what point was being talked about. acknowledgement. and/or interest in the mindset or frame of mind . The frame here is that she has her "standards" and that this is good for her. and/or interest in the Mindset or Frame of mind. and you are working to change the way she screens out guys. Recall a specific "moment" in the conversation. Then you start to lead by bringing up the idea that some risks are fun and interesting. What it "means" to them. or provide a relevant example. now its being framed as exciting). The way they "feel" about it. the viewpoint. etc)..) Tactical Formula for Pace and Lead . where the point of the discussion in that moment was: The way they "see" something. (Risk was framed as dangerous. the frame of mind or mindset is the focus here.
understanding. even if that direction is close to where it was going anyway. Do this by introducing a "way of looking at it" that is similar to the one that is already being used. maybe even limiting beliefs or beliefs that really hold them back. Assignments for Pace and Lead . but really his mindset is the problem someone talks about wanting something different. but just make a point to sort of "direct" where things move. and/or interest in the Mindset or Frame of Mind but now start to "move" things in a new direction. and the frame associated with each. some way. you are just acknowledging the Mindset or Frame in this example. Examples: someone complains a lot. and you LEAD things in a different way. A good way to do it is to show agreement and understanding. and THEN do this "shift". or something you heard or read. Write down these subjects. Maybe bring up a way of looking at things that is totally different. or something someone said. The key is to first Show agreement. understanding. Page 37 . and/or interest" (Pace). Don't make this really abrupt or different. and maybe point out a similar example from your own life. Maybe bring up a different viewpoint or way of looking at it. Maybe acknowledge and then bring up an opposing view. Then "start to move things" (Lead) in your own way. Do this OUT LOUD for each example. With whom? Subject/Topic? Mindset / Frame of Mind 2) Pace and Lead Gently The next times these conversations happen. understanding. and they are the one not taking risks someone is prejudiced or judges other people. provide an example where you Show agreement. Maybe find a way. make a point to "Show agreement. Basically. These should be of a type where THE "frame" or mindset is something of which you are aware. and says they are cheap. and makes assumptions (has a certain frame) about people or groups. and HE is the one with the limitation someone complains about work and the managers. to find a positive way of looking at the situation. and their motivations etc. Think about discussions where YOU can see that these people involved are working on a certain set of assumptions. for each of those instances. a frame of reference. what it "means" that is not really in agreement with what was said. and/or interest.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course 3) Pace and Lead in a New Direction Next. etc someone looks at a political issue.Mindset or Frame of Mind 1) Make note of three conversations that you tend to have with people on a regular basis.
• At least it's not like XYZ. another way of looking at it is ... or assumed by the people involved.. The general way to approach this is: • Start by pacing something that is obvious about their current reality . o As you feel. and allow the conversation to continue with the same frame of mind in place.1. and then use that to lead someone somewhere.. it might not be that bad. o While you are . "Pace" their mindset... now make a point to have your "Lead" incorporate a real change of some type... Just introduce a new frame. o After you have . Meaning. o etc... it could be . o As you realize . A "safe" way to do this would be to find a positive way to look at the situation. What is done here is that you Pace based on something that is obvious (obvious in their "current reality"). a new aspect of "what it means". Continue to Pace by maybe stating an obvious point about their current reality o seeing XYZ o feeling XYZ o thinking about XYZ o etc. Some ways to do that is by saying things such as. Well. o As you see .. You know. Again.. using words such as) o As you are .. o While you are . and/or express what is on their mind. o While you see . but just find a positive way to look at what is being discussed. o While you think ...4 Pace and Lead ..Current Reality D5-T29 If you look at the languaging used in things like hypnosis. focus on the Mindset or Frame.... these techniques are used a LOT.. This may be different from the way the subject or belief WAS framed or thought of.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 3) Pace and Lead In a New Direction Once you can do the above.. Now you are to "take" the conversation somewhere else and bring up a new mindset or frame of mind..... even without your input. A friend of mine used to feel the same way and they.. (for example. point towards a specific Mindset or Frame that is of YOUR choosing.. and new way of looking at things... 3. or used by very powerful speakers. The earlier exercise had you just sort of "run" with that... o You are probably wondering Page 38 • • .. a new mindset.. but it can work well and adds to the power of the languaging. there was a certain "frame" being discussed. This is a small-chunk detail and technique.
"as you are watching this presentation . Really pay attention and see how many times I have done pacing and leading in this manner. o you will start to notice o you may realize o you may start to think o you may see how . etc.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • o As you are thinking about o I know you are concerned about o The issue that may be on your mind is o The question you may have is Begin to lead .... o you will then .. o state what you want them to see/feel/hear/realize Examples: • As you are listening to this program .... The more you hear this. Rewind or go back a few tracks..Pacing Reality too much can seem arrogant... Make note of how many times I have paced your current reality. what you are thinking.".. o notice what its like as .." • You will hear a LOT of this in this course (which is part of your re-programming!) Tactical Formula for Pace and Lead .. 3. thoughts. what you are reading. Page 39 ... Point them to where you want to lead them ..) • Then you will "Y" Where "Y" is something you want them to experience (Lead) Exercises for Pace and Lead . the more it will "sink in". it starts to become annoying to the listener.." • Physical demos use this a lot...... Warning . o another thing you will see/feel/notice is ... then you are probably wondering . If you spend too much time saying things similar to "I know what you are thinking". Studies have been done with persuasive language that show that giving a reason will make people more apt to do things for you and agree with you.. and "As that feeling builds.2 GIVE THEM A REASON D5-T32 Give someone a reason for someone to listen ... and do.Current Reality 1) Listen to this section again. what you are hearing. "As you feel this.. • You are talking to someone at work ..Current Reality As (while ) you) are "X" (Pace) Where "X" is something that is true in their current reality (perceptions.. you will begin to notice this ..
and out loud. The examples will be better if these are people you do not know. Assignments for Give Them A Reason 1) Make note of five routine situations that you have in your life where you are asking for something. just providing a reason. they may go with you. It could be asking for coffee. Person What did you ask for? 2) Practice out loud how you might "ask" for that favor or make that request again. because I am really in a hurry" then. the addition of this small "reason" will make people much more agreeable and apt to let you do what you would like. However. 3) Go through the same list again. • You are talking to someone and you would like to pull her aside and make the conversation more private. This technique does not provide a 100% guarantee. requesting something. If you just say. come up with another reason. asking "can I pay by credit card". Write these down. "hey. anything. but put in a reason of some type.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Don't worry about "losing your power" or being too "nice". Page 40 . remarkably. You are not being apologetic or anything. or asked someone to do something. then it may be difficult to get people to agree. Examples: • You walk up to a copier at work and there are three people in line. Tactical Formula for Give Them a Reason Request X because (of) Y Exercises for Give Them a Reason 1) Make note of the last five times you asked someone for something. If you say. you don't need to be concerned about these things. it just helps to make people more agreeable (and there are statistics to support that as well). lets move over there". "Is it ok if I make copies next". if you say "Is it ok if I make copies next. Write these down. However. if you say "Let's move over there because it's more quiet" you will be amazed at how much more agreeable the person may be. or at least people that are not close friends of yours.
3) The next times these situations come up in your day-to-day life. and quite well. or excuse. you get someone to agree and then lead them 3. See if you can make it automatic. and flow easily. just as an example) • Hypnotists use this technique a LOT. Power in Numbers . • For the sake of a conversation. don't just provide one reason. or make a statement.Repetition in a way that serves you. People) What do you ask for? 2) Practice out loud some "reasons" that you could give in these situations. "List" several things or examples which support your point. go ahead and mention the "reason". • This is somewhat similar to a "pace and lead". point. in order to provide more power to what you are saying. statement. • When you give a reason. or make a point.1 General Listing D6-T4 Strategic Formula for General Listing General Listing is a way to quickly provide several reasons. This technique has been developed based on observing how many good and influential people speak: • Successful sales people • Charismatic speakers • Good debaters • Component of hypnotic languaging « Very important. it's difficult to debate them all or object to them all (not to be combative. the items that you will "list" need to be brief points. provide several. 3. Page 41 .3 LISTING D6-T1 Listen to an example where many of these are used. so that your one "opportunity" in a conversation to make "a" point.3. actually ends up being several points. Tactical Formula for General Listing When making a point. • When you give several reasons at once. or giving an example. • Training for sales people use this quite a bit.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Situation (Place. which support your point.
etc.. Mention the first item. 3) Pick an example of an activity that you do often. really recall listing to good speakers (2). maybe watching sports. Now. true... and maybe 3 different things that support your "point". as a list. Z". etc. 5) Think of three recent conversations you have had with people where you were making a point. Something you are interested in. doing some type of work. Y. Then. listing is like pacing and leading. Now try again by expounding on each of the items. Listing can be short. but instead you talk ' about each for a few moments. partying. Maybe your first two items in a list are obvious. as in saying three items . strange (2).. so that you don't just say "X. and still. write down who it was with. Write them down. and start to think about in a positive way (3). the third item may tend to "lead" someone in some way.X and then other times . you may begin to agree.each of which lasts just a few seconds.) • I know this may sound a bit different (1). talk about it for a sentence or two.2. sometimes . then the second.. make them brief. maybe trying to convince someone of something (NOT an argument-just that you were making a point and would like to be more persuasive).. and/or what it's like to meet people. 3. Pick three ways that can go . Z (selecting your items listed above). and somewhat new (3).. playing a game. Activity that you like or do often List a particular part of aspect of that activity What are three "ways" that can go? " 4) Now describe "What its like to do your activity . where each lasts several minutes. a.. In many ways.. Who you were talking to Page 42 .. Select a particular aspect of that activity. etc.. what are three ways that can go? Good? Bad? Indifferent? Exciting? Boring? Pick three and write these down What are three "ways" that the experience of "meeting people" can go? 2) Now practice out loud by saying something like "Isn't it interesting how you can meet people and it happens in different ways? I mean sometimes . Y. Each of the items in a list can also be much longer. briefly. Do that out loud.. what point you were trying to make. and the types of things to which no one would object.. but as you listen to it (1)." and mention those three different ways.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Example (see the listed items shown as 1. Exercises for General Listing 1) Lets say you are talking to someone about "Meeting people". For each conversation.
by placing YOUR preferred item at the end.3. it makes it seem as if you are being fair. the other. how you could bring up these three points in a list-like manner. However. at times you want to use listing as a way to highlight or focus upon one item. out loud. we were talking about three points in a list that all were similar. Placing that particular item at the end of a list can have that effect. it sticks in the listener's head more. a table. 3.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Point you were trying to make Three items that support your "point" b.At The End D6-T15 If several items are mentioned in a list (for example a car. and an elephant) what tends to "stick" in your mind? (The Elephant!) The last item! By hanging an item at the end of a list. activity. the one that comes to mind the easiest is the one that YOU want someone to agree with. Who you were talking to Point you were trying to make Three items that support your "point" c. you put more emphasis on it. etc) By doing that. However. You weren't trying to emphasize one point vs. you were just listing several things in a list. Therefore.2 Listing . Who you were talking to Point you were trying to make Three items that support your "point" 6) Recall a specific moment in each conversation. or different types of alternatives (to a thought. Maybe you want your list to contain many options. and tends to make THAT point the most important one. Now practice. In the earlier Listing examples. it's easy to think of that Page 43 . suggestion. Maybe you want to list several options or examples. Normally. Here is a way to think about it. and just providing a series of options. Do that for each of the three examples above.
. In general. I know.A t The End Listing at The End is a way to provide several options (which may differ) but to emphasize the option that YOU want. they are nice.. the more convinced you are that that person is NOT the one! o Hopefully though... I put another list within THAT description (a.. did you notice the use of the words this/that/these/those? Also where do you think I might have been pointing and gesturing during those examples? Job interview o Have you talked to many candidates? Yes. you eventually find this person that on some level. interesting. See? Not only did I have a list of three (1. one after another. Again. etc . lets say you are talking about doing some activity. but even when describing that person. how they can almost become a blur. you just really click and you feel this connection . but you spend some time with that person (2) and the more that person talks. o It could suck. Say that one LAST and bring up two other options. It may be because you like the resume (a). o You know what it's like when you meet someone . and there is just something about this person. or instances FIRST. was said that at the end? By the way. c)! • • • • • • Strategic Formula for Listing . maybe it's boring. Examples • • Fun activity. Sometimes there is nothing special. and the third one "eventually find this person" was the one I wanted to really "stick". those people doesn't mean much either way . you know . or it could really be fun. but by placing "it could be fun" last.. right away. o May be frustrating to you.that is the one (3). It's interesting though. b. this is one of those subtle but very powerful things that many persuasive speakers do a LOT.. They are not all the same.... you know that those people are NOT qualified (1) o Others you maybe have thought were ok at first. Now those are different ways of seeing it. you know? See how I did that? See how the item which I really wanted them to think about.2. you put more emphasis on it and it tends to make that one "stick" more. or this person presents himself really well (b). 3).. o Other times you get that sort of a "friend" vibe with that person.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course one... you meet someone. and then finish with YOUR preferred item. When I have interviewed a lot of people. examples. o And other times . This course. or they just have the right answers (c). I have had to do that myself at times.. Again let's bring up this example of "meeting people". you just know ... it could be boring. I mean. they sort of fell into several groups o There are some people that. or maybe you are really seeing the power of all of this! I think you can tell which option I was going for! Meeting People. Page 44 . It's just a matter of getting to this person.
go somewhere. etc. "List" several things briefly in order. make sure that the one that YOU want to do. Maybe add a small "list" within that last item (because it's inexpensive..Let say you arc trying to get someone to buy something. talk about the issue. List three possible things that you could do and write these down. and seem too direct. buy some thing. it makes sense to "bury" that item in the middle of a list. and you are all figuring out how you are going to spend your time. Issue or Option What do you want? 5) Now. Maybe pause when saying it. it can be TOO obvious. Three things that you and your friends could do (activity) 2) Practice. and therefore you do NOT want it to stick out too much. and they are haggling or objecting a bit. Exercises for Listing . Maybe add an embedded command of some type. where you are trying to convince people to do something. In that case.At The End 1) Lets say you are going to spend a day or evening with some friends. out loud.. 3. but mention the one which YOU want to put the most emphasis on.). However.3. Go ahead and suggest that item. or giving an example.Burying Items D6-T24 When using a List. and what the result is that YOU want. Maybe you want to suggest something very direct or quite controversial and you do NOT want to give it too much prominence. and bring up at least two other "options" BEFORE you mention the one option that you want. LAST.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Tactical Formula for Listing . close. placing something at the end can add to its power and make it stand out. 4) What is an example from your life (recently).? Write down what the "issue" is. You may want to "test" to see how the person will react to it. mentioning all of these in a list. but bury it inside a list. Here is a way to think about it.At The End When making a point. but place some more emphasis on that last item. agree to some point. and we always have fun . out loud. At times however. etc. You want to mention or suggest something that is quite strong. maybe controversial. statement. is the item you mention LAST.3 Listing . Examples: • Sales . If you say Page 45 . 3) Do that again.
or possibly you still want to negotiate. For example. This is also a good way of testing someone's response. we can leave together right now. or possibly you just still want to negotiate . So maybe you say something like o "Well. Very direct. or maybe you want it so much. bury it inside a list. lets say that you want to say something or suggest something that is very direct. If she gasps and has a look of shock and horror when you make that suggestion. and maybe there is a possibility of you even spending that night together. and when you say it at the end like that. The idea of " seize this chance and get it while you can" is something rather challenging to say (as the seller) that directly. However. o "well. more "appropriate" items to lighten it up." Doesn't that sound better? Meeting at a Party .. that you are almost "worried" about how the listener may react. maybe it IS too direct.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • • • "Well. one of them is to just slip the deadline. just suggesting. it seems too obvious... • Instead of thinking about it in terms of a list. and you are talking about you two getting together sometime. Lets say your idea is so controversial and over-the-top. There are several options but. you can get away with an outrageous or very direct option by burying that option in the middle of a List. lets say you are working on a project and things are behind schedule.. maybe you seize this chance and get it while you can . it's your choice.. or to maybe see if you can get someone to agree to it! Tactical Formula for Listing . you don't just say "we can slip the deadline". seems to "lighten" it up somehow. But of she smiles and seems interested. more powerful and direct statement in the middle.. that you will just seize this chance and get it while you can! That sounds almost TOO forceful.Lets say you have met a women at a party.Burying Items When giving examples or options to someone. that may be a GOOD sign. it seems a bit easier for you to say it. Strategic Formula for Listing . See? Putting that one. Sometimes you have that "direct" item in mind and you surround it with other.Burying Items Listing . But if you switch the order. its your choice. It also allows you a chance to watch the persons reaction to it. maybe you aren't ready to buy this now. honestly. or maybe I'll call you tomorrow". Instead. Page 46 . "let's slip the deadline" might be a problem in some circles! So when people are talking about options to help the project. maybe you aren't ready to buy this now. we can talk in a few days...Burying Items is a way to mention an outrageous or very direct option for "testing" purposes.
it can stand out too much and be annoying. and go ahead and practice how you COULD have said it. For three different situations that have come up in your life recently. in the middle and see if it is a bit easier to imagine saying that list. see if it seems easier to say. After these situations occur. Go ahead and change the order of the list that you used earlier. you will probably encounter some situations where you might want to suggest something quite outrageous or direct.Burying Items 1) As you go out and live your life.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course Exercises for Listing . Situation Outrageous or Direct Suggestion you could have made.Burying Items 1) Go back to the previous exercises where you said some "lists" out loud. See if you can make it sound natural. 3) Think of some recent situations where you would have liked to mention a quite outrageous or direct suggestion. and then trying saying that item in the middle. or the most direct item. but see if you CAN say it. by burying it in a list. If there is not one. but as with any technique. make a point (afterward) to think about that outrageous option. you may even want to say it in a joking way. suggesting a List of options but burying that outrageous option in a list. 2) In the near future. Try it out loud. Try saying it with the strongest item at the end. but do it by burying it in a list. go ahead and create a new item that is very outrageous or direct. as any opportunities come up where you would like to make an outrageous or quite direct suggestion. Listing can be powerful. Look at the items that were listed and see if one of them maybe seemed very "strong" or "direct". go ahead and do so. write down an outrageous or very direct suggestion that you would have liked to make (for each). Page 47 . if you do it TOO much or too blatantly. 2) Practice out loud how you would say that list in the situation you used in the previous exercise. Situation Outrageous or Direct Suggestion 4) For each of those examples (above) go ahead and practice out loud. Assignments for Listing . Bury the strongest item.
"the more YOU FEEL this ..5 Listing Review D6-T37 If you want to get your point across. I gave an example (in the audio) of several things I wanted someone to do. thinking about languaging such as "The more X. can help to alter how the options (and you) are perceived.. emphasis. in a List. 3. The general structure here is: • • The more X o where X is something that is hopefully quite obvious and true to the listener . Maybe one or more of the items actually has an embedded command in it... to "pull" the listener in. etc.4 Listing. remember to use emphasis and change your voice tone with the items. if it's a VERY outrageous option. you are walking someone through a series of steps or thoughts... and the more Y. and Emphasis D6-T36 You may be worried about coming up with three things in a list . then the more Y. this is just a way of bringing together many of the things we have learned. really. the more Y Page 48 . etc".3.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 3.. 3.How do you think of them quickly? How do you make them sound natural? Don't worry! It is ok to have pauses! Pauses make things sound more natural and gives you time to come up with options! We talked about the use of pauses as a way to convey some drama and to make things interesting. If you must suggest several different examples or options. then mention several of your points or examples that support what YOU want." "More and More" is just a way to use these and bring them together. then the more Y.. as in ... In a way. and provide many examples to support it.. o See how we are listing several items? • We discuss Pace and Lead . changing tone. and see how.3. and they WILL stay through the pauses! As you are saying various items in a list. the more Z". or experience.. So. then present it buried within a List of options. Using pauses. Lets use this as a chance to really step back for a moment and look at this structure. Or.. Maybe you want to stress one item more or less. Pauses. place that item at the END of the List for more power. In a way. and using lists.. but have ONE that YOU really want to emphasize or get people to agree to. consider this: • We talked about listing . D6-T38 You have heard language like "The more X. and I just strung those together . while incorporating the language tools we have already discussed. o See how that is being used here? • We have discuss language details . we are pacing and leading.4 MORE AND MORE. so this all works in your favor! Just be interesting enough to keep their attention. think.. then. o See how they are incorporated.
or "as you notice X". etc). The best way to do this is to start off with the first item as quite general.. Instead of seeing this as a new type of language. you can use "as you" or "while you" as a way to bridge between sections as well. . from a general item towards something that YOU want.. • • • • As you (or while you) X . the More Y. present. etc. towards what YOU want.. as you feel this.. THEN make the next item (more.. see it as just a way of using many of the things we have already covered! More and More tends to be best thought of as a "List".. like a series of successive steps (things you do. etc How to use it. then. future) can be altered to make it fit well.. which is more of an example of using Pace and Lead of their current reality. you notice this.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course • • o Where Y is something that is a logical extension of what the listener knows and they see this as something that makes sense . 3.. experiences. or realize Y. o walk someone through though process .. As an alternative. the more you can notice Y . o You can start off with something obvious as a statement to kind of pace them.. If you have something that you want to lead someone through.. or thoughts) use "More and More" as a way to string them together (and increase your chances of that happening. Page 49 . and as Y happens o or as you sense Y.. or as Y is happening . 2. The More Z. • Sell TV sets. Tactical Formula for More and More The more X.) or thoughts (things you experience or think about. then the more Z starts to happen. agreeable.) item.. and even more so with the next (more. with "as X is happening". Strategic Formula for More and More If you want to lead someone through a series of steps (actions. the more Y.. and then use More and More to lead them forward . or a new "pattern".... etc Examples • Convincing friends to go do something that you want to do. the More Z.. more and more.. then. That's a general version of it. the More Y.. the more Z. The more Y. As you X.) specific. step 1.. then just list them but use "more" as a way to go from one to the next.. The small words and verb tenses (past. and something obvious. and the more Y happens . You can even start by "pacing" a bit more. You are "leading" someone.
. and string them together using "more". while you. Think about a series of steps. what to do. Think of all of the things you can do tonight Realize that going to a movie would be a good idea Going to see the latest XYZ movie (use whatever movie you wish) See how that is a series of steps? Of thoughts? Like leading someone down a path? Now out loud. You may start with "As you" or "while you" for the first one. o Walk her through the process. etc. 2) Think of the last time you were trying to convince a friend to do something. work around it and make it sound natural. more leading. The next is another step in the series. practice and see if you can talk about these one by one. of what you want to have happen. more and more.. as if in a conversation. What you were trying to convince a friend to do Three steps. if the person followed them. something. or have them experience. practice saying those in series.. (Agree where to go to dinner. to get towards doing what you want. as you. Write these down. "as you" or "while you". what to buy. maybe an activity.. or as alternatives. Exercises for More and More 1) Consider the idea of convincing some friends of going to a movie. the second. or something you want to lead people to do somehow. a trip. etc. who should do what.. and bridging between them as we discussed earlier (More. or series of thoughts or actions. Do that several times. that would "walk" the other people through the process of agreeing with you.) Write down three steps. 4) Think of another series from your life. something with which you are familiar. using "More". a plan. The first should be obvious. Do the series several times. they would end up doing what you wanted. Don't just say "more". 5) Out loud. The first should be obvious. 3) Now out loud. that start off in general. etc . practice saying those three steps. Think of three "steps". etc. What do you want to convince someone to do Three steps. a series of thoughts or actions that.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • Talking to a woman . something simple. to get towards doing what you want.. something you convince people to do (or wish you could). more in your direction. but more and more get closer to what YOU want. Think of three "steps". what project to work on.) Page 50 . a movie.
Maybe just try 2 of the 3 steps once or twice. the more things like "knowing what to say" and "what pattern to use" will become easier and easier for you! Notice how we are not doing these examples necessarily with women? Wonder why? 3. A Tactic for Talking • Too many guys let a good conversational subject finish far too quickly. • You are just comparing and contrasting things. and you discuss these two aspects using Compare and Contrast. • It also a great way to get information about the person with which you are speaking. How to use it. • This works especially well if the subject of the discussion is one that "works" for our purposes (fun. This Compare and Contrast method here gives you a way to talk about and around the subjects at hand. to continue.. becoming more and more convinced..) • Too many guys focus on standard lines such as "So what do you like about X". we had you think of something from your life. look for opportunities to use that in your life..another option • Black . or several different subjects.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course Assignments for More and More 1) In the exercises.5 COMPARE AND CONTRAST D6-T54 Listen to an example where many of these are used. Just make sure that with that subject. or else have the person you are speaking with mention it. you have two (or more) aspects of a topic. this is a means to keep speaking. So. seductive. There are various means of doing this. and piece them together and have it sound natural. where you could have a series of "states" lead someone through the process of doing what you want. • It's not magical in a persuasive sense. • • Take a subject and either mention another aspect of that subject. etc. or various aspects of a subject. the more you will understand how they fit together. Maybe add or change some of the reasoning. But get to the point where you can flow easily through the 3 in a series. and even change the specifics of that sequence. exciting. The more that happens. You will see that the more you get these bits and pieces. Practice that series more! Get very familiar with it.Bad • One option . it's just a good way to think about discussing a subject. • How two things are similar • How two things are different • Good . This method provides a way to keep the conversation going.Left Page 51 . you can talk about. 2) With that "More and More" sequence practiced.. and move a conversation.White • Right . you are able to easily go through such a "sequence".
This all provides a good way to allow the discussion to continue for a while. this meeting. and talk about its attributes as well. what they like. and discuss whether the handling makes it better. Examples • One brand of car vs. • Link anything good to you. and this situation that you are sharing. What is different about each? How are they the same? How are they experienced? What is good? What is bad? etc. what they do not. You discuss this. Then discuss the other car. • Notice what is liked and not liked • Notice any reactions. link away. etc.. you can anchor and link positive things to you! o While talking about things she does not like. o You select two items. or point in a discussion. • Decisions about a career or job. team sports. • Maybe what is more important to a sports team. Use the other language tools during the discussion. you can use all of the other tools we have discussed. or its power. How do these differ How are they the same Which is good-bad. you can take note of how the person is responding. and start to compare and contrast the two. her. you can anchor those away from yourself. states. compare. better-worse. One attribute . good or bad. Select another subject. and to let the person think about. that are good for you. or point in a discussion .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • One aspect . Strategic Formula for Compare And Contrast Use this technique to keep the conversation going. you can talk about one car. • Anything bad. Tactical Formula for Compare And Contrast Take any subject. and you start to talk about something she likes and enjoys doing. • • Use opportunities to use commands and trance words to create thoughts. experience. two facets of that subject. etc. another brand. feelings. vs.another aspect -. or individual sports vs. idea. o Maybe you start to ask her about it (have a discussion with her . easy-difficult. • You talk to someone for a while and she say she likes scuba diving.another attribute As you are talking. Page 52 . and contrast these things. and incorporate the language tools. the offense or the defense. • You may talk to a woman.. deciding to focus on making a good living now. keep the discussion focused on a topic that serves your purposes. taking a position with a more promising future. associate them with things other than you. As you are talking. and feel those states and emotions for a while as well. o While talking about what she does like. then discuss these by comparing and contrasting. idea.about her) and she mentions various things about that subject.
then I KNOW that you would NOT like THIS . etc). As in "so let me make sure I understand this .".. and put effort into correct linking/anchoring/pointing to associate positive things to you. etc.. Be aware of your language! Throw in adjectives and adverbs. 3) Recall a recent conversation with someone you know. etc. bike. Now talk out loud about each. she mentions various things about it. and this time. This example uses a very obvious "Like vs..." or . Be descriptive! Use pauses. In addition. and anchor/link/point appropriately. and this time. o So we talk about the feeling of quiet. that within that may be attributes that are good. Subject or thing that they like Attributes (things about) that. Be vary aware that even when you are discussing the thing you "Like". that they do like Do the re-enactment again. and various things about that subject or topic that they like. offer the compare-contrast ways of discussing it. Now think of what is opposite to that .. Be mindful of that and anchor/link appropriately.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Maybe you ask about it. Maybe some of the language that you are using that may lend itself to be embedded commands. Letting Go Safety and Excitement Liking someone mentally and/or physically o • • • • Exercises for Compare And Contrast 1) Pick some possession that you have that you REALLY like (car.. She says she likes the aspect of it being very quiet and serene under water. but this time put some effort into being very aware of the positive and negative things that are being said. 4) Select two of the following 4 topics. Something that you like Something that is opposite 2) Now take that same topic. Use compare and contrast to talk about each of the attributes that your friend would say they like about that subject. different computer. and talk about it again. so if you like THAT. Not-Like" set of things to compare and contrast. she finds the experience of seeing new and different things to be interesting as well."Oh.(because). Also. computer. Re-enact that conversation again. be very aware of the positive and negative things that are being said.. where they were really describing or talking about something they like. clothes. Familiarity vs. Something New Control vs.. different style of clothing.. and those that are not good. etc). change your tone of voice.. etc. somewhere else. and serenity on one hand o and compare and contrast that to the feeling of something new and different on the other. your pacing. and compare/contrast the two.same type of thing (another car. Page 53 .. the same holds true even when discussing what you do NOT like. peace. and negative things .
There ARE many things that people tend to THINK of in an "either-or" way. Who knows.. this doesn't necessarily show that you Page 54 . this just helps to keep things moving in a conversation. If you are talking about an interesting subject. and the positive aspects of excitement. Something New Now do your best to speak out loud and "talk" about these for a while using a Compare and Contrast structure. and parts of a person 3. if you are asking many questions about something that is NOT of interest to you. but when you go STRAIGHT for the BEST thing that she likes the MOST. Meaning.6. Think about the possibilities. Excitement. and you lose out on spending a LOT of time having them discuss something that she REALLY likes! This is just a way to have a discussion. For even more Power There IS a very powerful aspect of this technique that is important to mention. together. you may end up liking the subject and find a new activity for yourself! Don't worry that you will "give the wrong impression" by inquiring and discussing these "parts". 3. some are bad • Talk about the good parts. exciting. it's too weak. and that's ALL you discuss. YOU are then showing someone how BOTH of these things can be experienced. Safety vs.Who wants to talk about something that you are NOT interested in? However. Parts of a subject. you can show someone how that can be possible. link away Now this may seem tough . BOTH linked and anchored to YOU. topic. Letting Go Safety and Excitement Liking someone mentally and/or physically Familiarity vs. Too many guys just blow things to quickly. By comparing and contrasting them.6 PARTS D7-T1 Listen to an example where these are used. etc.. and say (for example) "what do you like most about scuba diving" or "what is the most fascinating thing about." and that's ALL they talk about! Yes.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Control vs. of having all of the positive aspects of Safety. People tend to think you have one OR the other.. this provides a good way to train you to be able to talk and ask questions of people. Some are good. Two types of parts we can work with . link them to you • If the bad or boring parts some up. Parts. For example. However there ARE ways to have BOTH..1 Parts Of A Subject D7-T4 This is a variation on the contrast principle. then talk about all of the various aspects and parts of it. it is GOOD to focus on the positive aspects of what she likes. etc. and get them to talk about what THEY are interested in. that is fun. theme.
and she may have a lot of positive emotions and feeling associated with that . o Where have they dived? o How did they get into it? o What's their favorite place? o Do they have their own equipment? o Do they use different types of equipment for different locations? o How long have they dived? o Have they ever been in danger? o Have they taken photos? o Have they met interesting people? o Has this exposed them to any other cool sports or activities? o etc. Subjects come up. list various "things" about that subject. and enjoys. Strategic Formula for Parts of a Subject Discussing many of the parts of a subject keeps the conversation going. that you know. don't like. be comfortable talking about all of the parts of that subject. activity. Tactical Formula for Parts of a Subject Take any subject. 1) Pick a subject that you like. etc.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course are interested in it (the subject). just say "I like learning about people. it's hard to talk about that subject for a while. know about. Examples • Scuba Diving . If she LIKES scuba diving. Page 55 . that an opportunity to talk for a WHILE about something she likes. artistic endeavor. Exercises for Parts of a Subject . Use the language tools in the discussion.. Now. like. feelings and emotions. sport. allowing you time to gather information and link yourself to good thoughts.many of which can be linked to you." This technique makes it easier to have conversations with people because THEY are giving you information and ideas for new things to ask about. topics come up. what people do. If someone asks you about this. new things. don't just ask "What is the most exciting thing about Scuba Diving?" That IS a good question. You are just asking. This isn't just a way for you to ask ask ask HER about things. or point in a discussion.Don't just "talk about" Scuba Diving! Or. but if you start there. etc. Break it down into its component parts and discuss them. etc. Link good thoughts.. just curious. feelings and emotions to yourself.. maybe a hobby. This is a great way to build rapport with a person as well. area of interest. idea.
or Things About. This should be someone you know well. Subject: Parts. someone you met at a party. and you were going to have someone (who knows very little about the subject) interview you and learn all about football. Write these down. what would you ask about? What are all of the various things and aspects of it that YOU could inquire about or that could come up in a discussion? These are the "parts" of that subject. Now think of something that THAT person is interested in or they are involved with. If you have trouble. You should be able to come up with at least 10 items. Now. a job they like. Someone that you recently met. passion. if your subject was football. what parts about football would you want them to ask about? For your chosen subject. or maybe someone in your life that you don't know very well. maybe a cousin you hardly see or talk to.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course For example. maybe pick a different "person" as your subject. Page 56 . etc. That Subject: 3) Now think of someone who you are NOT close to (that you do not know that well). and you have heard him or her talk about this. make a list of these parts. Maybe their hobby. etc. Person: Subject: Parts. if you were going to talk to them for like 30 minutes about that subject and were really going to ask them about it. or Things About. You should easily be able to come up with 10-20 items. like a co-worker. That Subject: 2) Think of one of your friends or family members and some activity or topic that THEY are really into. but hopefully this "subject" is something you are not really into.
Now. If you were going to talk to them for like 30 minutes about that subject. when you are speaking with a person you do not know hardly at all (yet you feel you will be able to talk to them for 10-15 minutes)... That Subject: " 4) Think of another person and subject. like the exercise above. what would you ask about? What are all of the various things and aspects of it that YOU could inquire about? What are the PARTS you could ask about? Write these down. Make a point to ask about many different parts of that subject. You know the person but you are not real close to them. mention like 10-15 different things you could ask or inquire about that subject. while YOU are there And you are linking and anchoring things to yourself Using all of the language tools and details And that person is finding YOU so fascinating and charismatic . when you are speaking with a friend or family member that you know well. but with which you are NOT familiar. They are talking about something THEY like Thinking about it. And of course the entire time. The subject they are interested in is something with which you are NOT familiar. 2) Sometime in the future. Person: Subject: Assignments for Parts of a Subject 1) Sometime soon. or Things About. make a point to have a good 10-15 minute conversation about a subject that THEY are really interested in.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course The key here is that this is someone you don't see often. Person: Subject: Parts. make a point to have a good 10-15 minute conversation about a subject that THEY are really interested in. and were really going to ask them about it. who is interested in something that you are NOT familiar with. Again. but with which you are NOT familiar. you should be able to list at least 10 items. off the "top of your head". Make a point to ask about many different parts of that subject. experiencing it. Page 57 . out loud. don't know really well. and feeling it.
. that adventurous side is just waiting to come out. and they feel that way. • Acknowledge the first part that is being discussed. In many ways. and start to discuss and validate that OTHER part. Don't Confront.. they hold back. that part of the person or type of behavior that DOES agree with you).6.. verify it. o "When you start to listen to this adventurous side . a way of thinking.. their way of walking through and looking at the world. or has the same wishes that you do. o Either in general like "there may be another side" o or more directly. In fact a friend of mine is very shy and one time. In a discussion. they are quiet. • "That's because there is another part. if a personality trait." • If this new or other "side" works more in your favor. that is more . adventurous . Discuss... etc. fun." • Bring up and acknowledge the fact that there is "another" part. or view. if the person is shy o "I understand how some people are shy. we are also reframing! We are changing the way they look at things. • What if it is not? What if they say they are shy. that XYZ part". great.2 Parts Of A Person D7-T15 Listen to an example where this concept is used.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 3. or part of a person. or way of looking at it. etc)" o "I know someone similar who as this other part to themselves." o "Many people like that also have another side to themselves. Let's say you are in a discussion with someone. and then say (for example). there is a more decisive. in a way you are also using Compare and Contrast as well... etc. etc" • Discuss this new or other "part" o "With many people. or parts. You do not want to appear to challenge or invalidate and personality trait that is being shown.... there is a more quiet side • If a person is well-thought-out (thinks things through and takes time). more spontaneous side to them. directly or indirectly o For example. A key concept to think about is to ALWAYS assume that there is a part of someone that does agree with you.." • There will be a lot of this shown in examples here in this section and at the end of the program. their reactions. lean more on the language and linking tools to bring it out. a way of acting or being is being discussed (and one that does not necessarily work in your favor) . there is a more adventurous part to themselves • If a person is outspoken. Because you are discussing several things. etc.. (where XYZ is a different or maybe the opposite behavior. what she did . exciting part of a person is being discussed. Page 58 .. "parts" are meant as in a personality trait. or reserved. Let's break this down. and I have found she has this other side. In this context. a "side" to the person. • If an adventurous. link it to you.. or side. another part hidden away.. or normally don't "do" certain things? • Then talk about that first (shy) part.. make it be experienced. This can be VERY powerful. "you may have the other side" o or by example "I know someone like that." o "You may have (or do have) another part (or side. just looking for the right time. • If a person is shy... etc. experiencing it.
they like to play things safe. (not good in a person. Examples: • Lets say that a person says they are not into taking challenges. o "A friend of mine does that as well. that can work in your favor. or part of the person (mostly something which has a negative connotation) Acknowledge that personality trait. • Maybe someone lies .. too confrontational.) Exercises for Parts of a Person 1) What if someone says. you are NOT discussing this as to say. having a conversation. Introduce and discuss that "other part" in a way that works to your advantage. way of thinking. I understand you have that side to you.. etc. deep down.. and 3 that are opposite... even when the other person claims or demonstrates that such parts are NOT there. "you are wrong" or to show how smart you are! You are just talking. "I am boring". that may be true but also there is another part of them .. assume there is a part that will work WITH you.. . What personality traits (or what other parts or ways of thinking) are similar? Which are somewhat opposite? Write down 3 that are similar. feelings. o "I was reading somewhere about things like that and what it was saying was. way of thinking. Traits similar to "Being Boring" Page 59 . it may sound like you are arguing or challenging the person. and evoke favorable states. o "I have a friend who was "X" (where X is the trait being discussed). There are also other sides to people . This one side . Remember. People have many sides to themselves. Tactical Formula for Parts of a Person For every part of a person that will work against you.. way of thinking. so be careful. • Maybe someone is secretive... o "Well.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • • Many times you don't want to say "because there is another part" because that seems too direct.. but it can be handled . and beliefs." Strategic Formula for Parts of a Person Use Parts of a Person as a way to find.. Well. discuss. You can work around this issue (of possible confrontation) by saying things like o "I think another way of looking at that trait is . or part of the person by discussing or addressing it Think about a personality trait. and she realized that she. • Maybe someone says they can be jealous. etc etc etc... Find a personality trait.. or part of the person that is somehow related (which works in your favor) or somewhat opposite.. and what I noticed about her is that she also has this other side to her..... was also "Y"..
Look at the formula earlier. and some of the variations mentioned for language examples. What personality traits (or what other parts.. etc. 3) What if someone says that they are shy? What personality traits (or what other parts or ways of thinking) are similar? Which are somewhat opposite? Write down 3 that are similar. Now do a similar exercise again out loud. Practice this out loud. but this time.. Imagine a conversation and how you might do this. be aware of opportunities to maybe mark off an embedded command or two (or more). and then bring up this other "part" that you selected. and 3 that are opposite.. 6) Lets say someone says "I am not into meeting any new people right now" . which could you maybe "use" in a good way? 2) Think about how you would discuss the boring part. Practice this out loud. Imagine a conversation and how you might do this. and some of the variations mentioned for language examples. use this/that/these/those . maybe do some linking an anchoring. 5) From the list you just made (and selected from). Look at the formula earlier. Traits similar to "Being Shy" Traits opposite to "Being Shy" Of those that you listed.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Traits opposite to "Being Boring" Of those that you listed. Page 60 .. pick another part or trait. and then bring up this other "part" that you selected. which could you maybe "use" in a good way? 4) Think about how you would discuss that shy part. or ways of thinking) are similar? Which are somewhat opposite? Think about 1-2 that you could use. Traits similar to "not into meeting any new people" Traits opposite to "not into meeting any new people" Practice out loud how you might first discuss "I am not into meeting any new people right now" and then transition into the other parts or traits that you selected.
or parts. See if you can arrive at a similar part or trait that you can discuss that could be used in your favor. and offer challenges" many times when studying these materials. You don't have to discuss them (yet) just make a point to note these traits. trusting their own judgment. Use the formula and the variations mentioned earlier.. etc could you discuss? Try that out loud. make note of when you are having a personal conversation with anyone. make a note of these traits or parts. After the conversation. This area has caused some confusion. Opposite (or similar?) trait or part that might actually work in your favor Conversation with Traits or parts that were discussed. or mentions a "way of thinking"). 9) Lets say someone says "I only like dating my TYPE"? What other part.7 OPPORTUNITIES AND CHALLENGES D7-T34 Listen to an example where I structure opportunities.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 7) Do the above example again. See if what they are saying describes or is pointing out any personality traits (or a "part" of themselves. and then point out some other trait or part that might work in your favor somehow. 3) Now that you can recognize these traits when talking to someone.. trait. trait. and then find a way to discuss another part that is more favorable or positive. and has been a bit difficult for many to really understand Page 61 . see if you can notice them WHILE talking to someone. etc could you discuss? Try that out loud. or putting him or herself down for some reason. Just notice the trait or part being mentioned. Assignments for Parts of a Person 1) For the next week or two. 8) Lets say someone says they have trouble meeting new people. and offer challenges to you on the audio. Or. but ROW see how many of the speaking and language tools you can use. 2) After you have become more comfortable noticing such traits after-the-fact. You have probably heard the phrase "structure opportunities. WHILE talking to someone. start to bring them up IN the conversation. An easy way to do this is when a friend or acquaintance is being self-deprecating in some manner.? What other part. see if you could maybe think of an opposite one that could be discussed. See if you can note that "part" of who they are. acknowledge it. being open. 3.
7.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course and utilize. and wants to be seen as intelligent. In this section. is a way for them to show their intelligence." • This is NOT about arrogance. effect. Why this matters. or be with you. then they already have mechanisms for that in their mind. or like to be perceived as having. You are in. do it. • Use these general things and assume they are there. or want to be perceived as having. "You may be beautiful. If you can somehow frame or map yourself as being a way for a person to fulfill things that someone already wants. • It's easy. It's good to somehow work with structures and things that are already in someone's mind. For example if someone is intelligent. but may not be the most effective strategy. Work with universal things that people would like to have. • Show that you are qualifying and screening to some extent. 3. you are using processes that they ALREADY have in their minds. o You are saying in a way. • These are also good and convenient for practicing and examples.7. this can be very effective. Universal Wants • Confidence • Maturity • Security • Self-Directed • Intelligence • Control • Excitement Page 62 . and that you believe in yourself. these concepts are broken down and offered to you in a way that will truly help you to be able to use these powerful techniques.2 What do people want? - D7-T38 "Universal Wants" = Good. Challenge them to demonstrate it.1 Using Their Own Processes D7-T36 If you know what people want to have. you are just showing that YOU have standards. using motivations that a person already has. • Show that you have standards. Strategic Formula for Opportunities And Challenges Find or assume what someone wants Create an opportunity for them to get it or demonstrate they have it Make that "demonstration" work in your favor. You then find some way to set things up so that choosing to listen to you. then by using their existing desires. 3. but I am looking for more. o This is the opposite of pleading and the "pedestal" scenario. or show it.
o You seem cool enough .... o You seem as if. o You seem smart enough .. o Talk about some of yours and see how she reacts. o Are you able to .. or adventurous. o You seem like you may have good taste o etc. What does she want to have. o You seem like ... o Maybe you can . can (use smart.. o The smart people I know. Warning ... o I wonder if you can . and challenging them in a way that says. o Try using some of the above items.. or an image she wants other people to have of her. o You might. o etc.This technique can be overused. that's even better. what she likes to do. o Talk about what she does. o If you are able to . or want to be perceived as having? Mini-Challenges D7-T40 3.. o You might see . o You may .... or be seen as having "X". o If you can . etc • Finding these particular wants and desires o These "wants" can be possessions.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course "Particular Wants" = Better! What does THIS person want? • Notice o o o particular things that this individual would like to have or be perceived as having She mentions wanting respect She defends her position. You are challenging an ASSUMED desire (a "Universal Want").. by listening to me or agreeing with me". but if you can find or work with specific wants or desires.. • Mini-Challenges o You might get this . wants to have. and discusses what is important to her She mentions something she likes or dislikes about a past boyfriend... "you can show me that you have the thing you desire.. we are using one of these sort of "universal" wants.. o Always have the question below in mind.3 There are certain things you can assume that most people may want to have. her interests. etc). Mini-Challenge Cheat Sheet o You seem . or fun. o Talk to her and find out what she wants or needs..7. or maybe a value... You can imply a "test" for these things by issuing a mini-challenge.. along with the Universal Wants listed earlier! • We assume here that with a mini-challenge. or want to be perceived as having. and it can really annoy people if you do! Page 63 ......
Tactical Formula for Opportunities and Challenges Find something "X" that the person wants to have. Make a statement that says.7.. What does someone Want? Assume. Creating Them Consider the wants and needs that a person may have . and see how many combinations you can come up with. or hopefully find. in a way. 3. here we have to "assume" things for the sake of teaching) . • Create an opportunity for them to get that • Make it so that them "getting" that works in your favor. • Confidence • Maturity • Security • Self-Directed • Intelligence • Control • Excitement Page 64 . "By listening to and/or agreeing with me. you will show me you have that". or been seen as having You can assume based on normal things that people want (Universal Want) or Get information from talking (Particular Want) Create an opportunity for them to get or demonstrate "X". • Find what someone "wants".. what someone wants. (and again. • Universal Wants • Particular Wants Opportunities.4 Opportunities and Challenges D7-T43 Think of it like this. or be seen as having. • Challenge them to see if they will follow through and take action to get it. by doing "Y" Make "Y" something that works in your favor. "Show me you have that thing by listening and/or agreeing with me" or. Challenge the person to do "Y". and Mini-Challenge Cheat Sheet.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Tactical Formula for Mini Challenges Assume something she wants to have... Exercises for Mini-Challenges 1) Try piecing together items from the Universal Wants List.
Think about maturity . talk about DOING them. How can you make that sound like a way for them to "show" something? How to create an opportunity? • Here is a way for you to show me that you really have or was able to get X. o Let the person demonstrate how confident they are. Challenges Are they ready to take advantage of that (this) opportunity? Challenge them to get what they want. • Here is how I read/heard that someone else had or was able to get X.. something they want. or some way for this person to capture the opportunity • Provide an example of something she can say or do.. or want to be seen as having Structure this so that it is something that YOU would like them to do. on their own. o . Create the opportunity for them to show or demonstrate that they have or are perceived as having. • Provide a way to demonstrate that they DO have what they want. Examples: • Does she really want X and see how Y can get that? • Does she really have X.. • Maybe point out something a friend did . Maturity .. and how the confident ones are able to take chances and have fun. o They can go against the grain. o Talk about how confident people can make their own choices. o Mention how confident people can meet someone new. • Provide an example from your own life... • Here is a way a friend of mine showed that they have or was able to get X. by meeting this "challenge". where this opportunity benefits you (and hopefully pertains to the situation). Provide an example of someone.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course You need to create an "opportunity" for each of these.How can you create an opportunity for someone to appear confident (that works in your favor)? o Discuss people that YOU know. Talk about those things.. what does a mature person do? How are they seen? How do they react? o They make their own decisions o They trust their own judgment o They can decide to do something NOW. or show what they have. and/or HAVING them. o They can do exciting things.. and feel very comfortable with that. Examples. and see how doing Y would demonstrate it?> • Does she have what it takes to get X. • Confidence . by doing Y? Page 65 ... even if their friends don't approve. • Mention something that you have read.
Can she see an opportunity to have "X". • Find out what someone wants. Then at some point you talk about you and her getting together. You talk about a friend who has always wanted to feel secure. It's different from the way most guys think. she may have to do Y to prove that. I mean. and mention that you read somewhere that successful people tend to be able to trust their own judgment.. but.. how she may be adventurous. • • I know this is tricky...". I don't know if you are adventurous enough for this.. Page 66 . to show or demonstrate that? Examples: • Security o Say she wants to feel secure. or be perceived as having. and say something like "well. what this means to her. • Challenge them to do that.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • • • • • Does she want you to THINK she has X. as long as you trust yourself enough to feel that is OK . It's NOT about creating an argument! Again. Later. you mention "We should get together sometime. You discuss success for a while. Are they ready to do Y. These are your "Assumed Wants". their own intuition. Success o Maybe "success" is important to her. and she found that by taking chances and risks. she actually felt more secure about being able to take care of herself. Assumed Wants 2) Write a Mini Challenge for each if the above items. then . Exercises and Assignments for Opportunities and Challenges 1) Make a list of some assumed things that many people may want to have..... Is she ready to take chances? Take risks? Do something different? Maybe not .. to be a way for them to get what they want. there are others shown earlier. • Find a way to map what YOU want. Some examples are shown below." Adventurous o Maybe she wants to feel adventurous. They want X. and do Y to get it? Can she do Y and make it happen? Can she see that Y will get her what she wants? Can she trust herself enough to do Y? etc. You talk about that for a while..
" Mini Challenges 3) Practice the list of Mini Challenges you just created. Write down these "Wants". and go out and actually USE them for a while.. etc. and NOT just things from the "assumed" list. For each person.. friends. "lets see if this makes sense to you "see if you can follow this . "you might. "you may . Note some of your favorites ones below. quite unique.. Person What they want to have. and focus on using these..... or wants to be perceived as having. Practice these more. write down something that each wants to have. co-workers. out loud 4) Make a note of some of the ones you practiced that seem closest to something you could easily say or do with people in your life. 5) Think about some people that you know quite well like family. or be perceived as having Page 67 .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course "you seem like . Hopefully these are specific to them.
see if you can create a "challenge". Is there a way to create an "opportunity" for them to get or achieve that? Can you somehow create an opportunity that can be "mapped" in some way towards yourself. etc? Give that some thought. Some way that questions . The good athletes find a way to relax and have fun. Example . are they ready? Can they take action? Can they DO this? Write down these "Challenges". See if you can make it sound natural. (You want that friend to lighten up and be able to spend more time going out and having fun. as making them look at you more positively. even subconsciously.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course 6) Consider the "want" that you identified from each of those persons above. and that allows them to be better at their sport. What is the opportunity.) So you challenge their dedication to their sport by saying "I was reading about really good athletes and one thing that was pointed out was that a lot of them really can get burned out. and how can you "map" it to yourself? Write down these "Opportunities". Page 68 . Person Challenge 8) Practice each of those "Challenges" out loud. and "opportunity". Person Opportunity for them to get what they "want" that somehow works in your favor 7) For each "want". You are "mapping" it to you because by doing what you discuss. and they spend a LOT of time practicing." The "opportunity" is for them to be a better athlete.A friend wants to be really good at a sport. or that in some way could be interpreted. want to do what you wish.. they will be doing something that YOU want.. and write them down.
3. listen. that these become familiar. listen. Although there could be a section in this course that deals with these areas. but in another context. That. see if you can bring them up in conversations over the next few weeks. These are those words or phrases that can mean more than one thing. These. really focus on what each person desires.8 AMBIGUITIES D7-T64 If you have studied this material for a while. Try to guess.. 3.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 9) As you become more familiar with these practiced challenges and opportunities. they mean something different. do the same in terms of observing desires. This is one area that many guys actually ARE able to pick up and use easily if they have listened to the materials enough. Those) MORE TOOLS o Pointing And Gestures o Linking Gestures (Towards And Away) o Easy Linking Expanded (Pointing With This.) o Easy Anchoring . Listen. you no doubt have heard many examples of "ambiguities".9 SUMMARY D7-T66 Bringing it together. so that you have heard them SO MANY TIMES. They may have one meaning in one context. What do they "want".Point Or Touch On Positive And Negative LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES o Pace And Lead " Topics and Subjects * Mindset of Frame • Current Reality o Give Them A Reason • • • Page 69 . • SPEAKING POINTERS o The "Cool" Factor o Voice Tone And Tonality o Pacing And Pausing o Energy And Enthusiasm LANGUAGE TOOLS AND DETAILS o Adjectives And Adverbs o Trance Words o Weasel Phrases o Embedded Commands o Linking o Easy-Linking (This... we will not be doing any specific work on Ambiguities.. 11) For the next 1-2 weeks. given that this IS an area that many guys are able to do (with enough listening) and given the many OTHER areas that really DO need the assistance of a program like this. to do things that you would want. but also ask some questions and get into a discussion about it if possible. That. 10) While you are talking to people for the next 1-2 weeks. listen. look at how many items we have covered so far. Do what you can to bring these up while in the conversation if you can. but now also start to look for "opportunities and challenges" in a way that directs their desires towards you.
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o o o
Listing • General • At the End • Burying Items More And More Compare And Contrast Parts • Parts of a Subject • Parts of a Person Opportunities And Challenges • Mini Challenges • Opportunities And Challenges Ambiguities
These are the building blocks for good Language skills. These are the sorts of skills that are most workable when they are truly "wired in" to someone, so that they are able to be used automatically. To try to "remember" to do such things can be very difficult. That approach would make having a conversation far too difficult and too much work! The best way is to work with these techniques SO much that these truly are just a part of "how you talk". With enough practice, and hearing these enough, you CAN have these become a part of how. YOU talk! So listen, practice, do the exercises, do the assignments, and do that all again, until these really do become a part of you, and a part of how you speak.
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D8-T1 A key aspect of making these tools work is getting the conversation into topic areas that will really work for you. The language tools you studied earlier are best used in the proper context, and in this section, we will learn how to get the conversation into areas that will create that context. Have you had these problems? • You JUMP too quickly into a pattern or topic, and it sounds really strange? • You just THROW a pattern AT her, and get a weird reaction? When you use these tools, or even use "patterns", it's not enough to just "say it", there has to be the correct CONTEXT for what is said! It's a process that she needs to go on and through with you. It's not enough to just find a conversational excuse to "throw" a pattern (or language tool) AT her! This section is about finding ways to just get into an interesting conversation and then towards and onto good topics. We want this to seem natural, and with some understanding, practice, and a few key strategies and tactics it will BE natural and automatic! 4.1 4.1.1 CHALLENGES -a Detailed And Specific Plans Are Just Not Workable. D8-T3
It's good to theorize to "say this", and then "say that", and then to use "this pattern", and "that pattern". However, the problem is that a lot of time the proper context is not presented well enough. The examples you may have seen in other products are just that, examples. The problem is that too many guys have taken them literally! Guys try to do "X, Y, Z," exactly, in order, with no sense of calibration, or being able to work and re-direct things in real time. Therefore, detailed tactical plans are not realistic. 4.1.2 Navigation Example D8-T4
Think of moving a conversation to a certain point, like taking a trip somewhere. Say you are in Chicago, and want to go to Los Angeles. You could have a detailed map of every turn and road, exact route numbers and lengths, etc. The problem is... what do you do if there is a detour? What if the road is changed, what if the map is wrong? You are lost! What if, instead, we teach you how to drive the car, and give you a general set of directions like "keep driving west, until you see the ocean, then turn left (south)". That way, you can handle just about any turns, roads, or detours that you may encounter! Conversations are different from roads too, because people are all unique, situations, times, surroundings etc. are unique and change from moment to moment. Therefore, if you want to get a conversation to go a certain way, then detailed plans made ahead of time are hard to work with. There are too many variables! We need a workable set of strategies and tactics that allows you, in real-time, to direct things the way that you want them to go. They need to be easy to follow, and easy to use, and something that you don't need to "think about", but can just DO easily.
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Navigational Strategies Are Needed
So we need a general set of guidelines, some overall strategies and tactics, so that you can have this good, intuitive sense of how to "steer" things, and get conversations to where you want them to go. As long as you are engaging a woman's emotions, capturing & leading her imagination, then you are moving in the right direction. Then, in that situation and in that context, linking all the positive & powerful things to you becomes more workable. Instead of a map, we are giving you a "compass". We need a strategy for managing conversations that can to do this gradually, in a way that seems natural! If it's too abrupt or makes the conversation strained, it will sound weird. The strategy must LEAD the conversation towards good topics and subjects in a way that seems natural, and is not TOO abrupt. Examples: (Listen to the audio.) • Talking about a printer o Moving TOO quickly towards emotional topics o Can sound strange • Driving a car and taking a turn (Analogy) o Think of driving down freeway and needing to switch to different direction. o You can't make a hard, right angle turn on a dime! o You need to turn the car, slowly, on a ramp to go in a different direction. When we control conversions, we need to find a way to take it gradually in a new direction. Many guys try to do the hard and fast switch, and they crash in the process! We will learn to move things in a way that makes it seem natural, but it will be deliberate. 4.1.4 She Must Be Engaged In The Conversation! D8-T10
It's important to get conversations into the right area and have HER go along with you. Not just "bring it up" (a topic or pattern), but it must be natural and she must "go along" with it and be a PART of it. She must be actually THINKING about what you are discussing! It has to happen naturally. No weird jumps. It's not enough to just talk; she must BE a part of the conversation! So, don't just "jump" to a topic. Don't find an "excuse" to bring it up. Take the conversation there, take her WITH you, and have her be a part of it! What really helps is to have a genuine interest (or at least curiosity) in her and the conversation, not just thinking to yourself; "How can I use this?" 4.2 HOW CONVERSATIONS HAPPEN D8-T12
How does this really occur? We will break this down so that we have a way to really affect this process. 4.2.1 Conversational Dynamics D8-T13
How do conversations happen? Most of them occur somewhat randomly as the conversation flows from topic to topic over time, and can end up almost anywhere after a while. By the time YOU move from one topic to the next,
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you may end up in a very different place from where you began. However, there is a series of steps as things move forward, as shown in Figure 4.2.1-1.
Figure 4.2.1-1: Conversations Move Through Many Topics
Each of these steps between topics tends to be related. Topic 1 relates to Topic 2. Topic 2 relates to Topic 3, etc. For example, you can start to talk about Cars, and then move to one aspect of that topic, Car Seats. Then it's easy to move to some aspect of that topic, which maybe something that seats are made of, like Leather. Then maybe you talk about Leather Furniture, etc. (See Figure 4.2.1-2.)
Figure 4.2.1-2: Each Topic Flows To the Next Topic In most cases, each Topic is related to the one before.
After a series of such steps, you can be at a quite different topic (like an apartment that you used to live in) even though you started at a quite different topic (Cars). In most cases, it's very difficult to predict where a conversation will go after many of these steps. As you go through a few topic shifts (as shown in the diagrams), although each individual shift relates to the topic before and after that shift, after a series of shifts you can end up talking about almost anything! Therefore, even if you start the conversation at a great topic, you can get off-track and into topics that will not work in your favor. Conversely, what is needed is a way to start at almost any topic at all, and by steering that process (of moving from Topic 1, to Topic 2, Topic 3, etc) take the conversation into better and better topic areas that will serve your purposes. 4.2.2 Conversational Model D8-T14
We introduce a model to assist in discussion, understanding, and control of conversations. If you start at a topic, how do you go to another one? This process happens all of the time very easily. The key is that the movement from one topic to the next takes places easily because there are so many options involved. From any topic (Topic 1) it is easy to flow to any of 6-8 other, related topics (Topic 2 Candidates). People usually just "talk" and naturally the conversation moves from the first topic to the next one. Since the "next" topic is related, this process seems natural and is easy to do. In fact, you do this all the time without really knowing about it. (We are creating a model to describe a process that happens naturally, so that we can teach you a way to have an affect on that process). Figure 4.2.2-1 shows how from one topic, the conversation can flow easily to many related topics.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Car you own Seats in it Interior of your car How Powerful it is What Gas does it use How Fast it is Feel of Driving Places you have gone Where you bought it
Topic 2 Candidates
Figure 4.2.2-1: From One Topic to many Candidate Topics The topic of Cars is discussed, and from there are many ways the conversation can easily move.
Once the conversation moves to one of these eight topics, it's easy to move to one of eight more. For example if in Figure 4.2.2-1, the conversation flows from "Cars" to "Where you bought it" (as in, where you bought the car), then now we have a situation like that shown in Figure 4.2.2-2.
Where you bought it
That car dealer The salesman Part of town Other car dealers Who went with you How you bought it The Loan you used etc. Topic 3 Candidates
Figure 4.2.2-2: From A Second Topic, Another Group of Candidates If "Cars" was discussed first, and then "Where you bought it" was discussed next, there are now many ways to go in the next step. In the figure, you see how the conversation moves from Cars, to "Where you bought it". After that, there are many "candidate" topics where the conversation can flow. Perhaps it moves to the "Part of town" where the car was purchased.
Now from the topic of "Where you bought it" (a car), there are easily eight places that you can go from there, shown as the "Topic 3 candidates". This process continues throughout a conversation. This process happens regardless of the specific topics being discussed. Conversations flow from topic to topic, as shown in a general manner in Figure 4.2.2-3.
there is no way to know exactly where it will end up by the time you have moved forward a few steps! Imagine trying to predict ahead-of-time exactly where you may arrive (among those 512 options).2. an so on. you can affect this process (and we will teach that to you).Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Topic 1 Topic 2 Topic 3 Topic 4 Figure 4. then talk about Z" are very difficult to really work with. since it's so easy to go from any topic to 6-8 others. When this happens in succession. when talking to some random person. the plans that many guys try to use to "Talk about X. In general.2-3: Topics Flow from One to the Next Each topic in a conversation can easily lead to 6-8 others. then EACH of the eight different candidates for Topic 2 can then lead to their own eight. In many ways. and at each step after that.2-4 shows what happens when all the topics are considered. However. then talk about Y. and the conversation flows along in this manner. the Figures that have been shown so far only show a small portion of the total topics towards which a conversation can flow. you can end up with the conversation going almost anywhere! Figure 4. With some skill and technique. because there are SO many ways that things can go! Page 75 .2. Do you see why the pre-planned approaches can be difficult?! Even if you ARE able to have the conversation start from a specific place (Topic 1). This results in easily over 500 topics that could be selected by the time we arrive at Topic 4! In only three shifts of the topic ("topic shifts" as shown in the figure) we end up with many many possibilities of where the conversation might end up. If Topic 1 can lead to eight different candidates for Topic 2. you can have up to eight different ways to go at EACH step.
2. It then can flow easily to maybe 6-8 others (the diagram shows fewer for the sake of clarity). Once Topic 2 has been discussed. it can flow from there. a conversation may start from one topic or subject (Topic 1). then after only three shifts in the topic. As seen in the diagram. Page 76 . you can end up in over 500 different topic areas! We can create a general Conversation Model that shows this process (Figure 4.2-4: Topic Candidates and Topic Shifts If each topic can flow to eight others.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 1st Topic Shift 2nd Topic Shift 3rd Topic Shift Figure 4. and so on.2-5).2.
3-1. if you assume that from any topic you could go to any of 8 other topics.000 different subjects or topics that could be discussed by the time you are at "Level 6" in the conversation!! 4.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Figure 4. is an awareness of this phenomenon that is called the "Topic Turning Point". There are SO many ways it can flow. The diagram only shows a small fraction of them (so that the diagram is not even more cluttered than it already is!). then for that diagram to be really accurate it would have to show over 30. Page 77 .2. it is quite easy to move from that onto 6-8 related topics. If you are discussing one specific topic. This process of moving from the first topic to one of 6-8 relevant topics is the process of moving through a "Topic Turning Point" as shown in Figure 4. that they become far too many to shown in the diagram.2. (The figure only shows a portion of how many subjects and topics can be reached).2.2-5: Conversation Model The "Tree of Subjects" showing how thousands of subjects can be reached in just a few steps of the conversation. In fact.3 Topic Turning Point D8-T15 The KEY concept the needs to be understood to gain the ability to manage conversations.
3-2 Topic Turning Points Figure 4. etc.2. ask a question.2. after one topic has been discussed for a short while. and throughout a conversation.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Candidate Topics Figure 4.2.3-2: How TTP Selections Effect the Conversation The selections made at each TTP are what actually "steer" the conversation in a certain direction. Therefore. Page 78 . the conversation "shifts" slightly.3-1: The Topic Turning Point (TTP) When discussing any topic (First Topic) there are easily 6-8 different topics to which the conversation can be moved (Candidate Topics). the conversation can then move to another topic. make a statement. Someone might make a comment. the overall flow of a conversation comes about due to many of these TTP choices being made. For example. introduce an idea. as long as the new topic is "related" to the first (this is shown in the diagram by the "candidates") then this change is easy to do. The key thing to realize is that this process of Topic Turning Point (TTP) selection occurs over and over. However. A general way of looking at this process is shown in Figure 4.
. to "route" conversations so that they end up being the kinds of conversations that YOU want to have. we are going to later teach you a way to be able to make these TTP selections. and the conversation tend to into one of four general areas. fun. positive aspects of every topic being discussed. conversations tend to go in one of several ways. 4. fun. D8-T16 D8-T16 So how can you actually affect the flow of a conversation. fun.3 4. interesting things". That ability alone is enough for our purposes. with some awareness of this process. The overall strategy at the beginning is then to "talk about positive. So to start our process of learning how to manage conversations. and that work in YOUR favor. choices are made moment to moment. • Other people may do the opposite. Sometimes this can be VERY apparent.Those are just general examples. The flow of the conversation starts. they somehow see it in terms how in effects their beliefs. but you will have some control over the overall direction. No matter WHAT you talk to them about. However... depressing Confrontational .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Normally. • Other people able to direct conversations based on their own beliefs and their own political motivations as well.3. and some training (which .1-1. Look in the diagrams. conversations are one of four types: • • • • Fun. is coming soon. easily and naturally? That IS the point. no one is "deciding" the TTPs. they find a way to point out something negative.3.) Page 79 . and imagine if you had a general way to manipulate these TTPs. you can direct where the overall conversation goes. • Other people direct conversations based upon their own moral or religious values. we want the conversation to be positive. isn't it? In general.. very quickly. IMPORTANT: The overall direction of a conversation comes about due to a successive selection of TTPs. Many people do this "TTP selection" process automatically..1 GENERAL CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Want. and interesting. For example: • Maybe someone always finds a fun. we want to first start to steer things in the best general manner. As you have probably guessed by now. These people are able to automatically make TTP choices based on a strategy of finding good. By manipulating TTPs from moment to moment. (See Figure 4. and they quick steer the conversation in that manner. In a very broad sense. moment-to-moment. Can you see how you may be able to affect where a conversation goes? You might not be able to predict EXACTLY where it ends up. they Good Boring Bad Argument could be more specific (and we will get there). positive way to look at anything. and do so in a way that sounds VERY natural. interesting Mundane and uninteresting Negative. This selection just "happens". positive. no matter WHAT is discussed.) then you CAN direct how a conversation flows.. These types of people are making TTP selections based on a strategy of finding things that are negative to talk about.
fun. Strategic Formula for General Conversational Management To steer the conversation in a good direction.1-1: General Conversational Management Consider all of the ways a conversation can go. Introduce topics that are fun. fun. do what you can to steer in that direction.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course General Conversational Management Conversations tend to flow in one of four major ways. interesting things. positive and interesting. and Interesting". Positive. No matter what is brought up. If you break that down into 4 main directions. fun. and Interesting topics and subjects. bring up positive. Figure 4. Page 80 . and Interesting" things. you can still "steer" back towards "Fun. steer towards Fun. Even if things move towards other areas. Positive. interesting things. so from the earliest stages. Positive. you see that you want to focus the conversation onto topics that are "Fun.3. interesting things. How do you do that? • • • Show interest when someone discusses positive. Don't engage in conversations when it's NOT about positive.
as long as it moves things in a way that answers the question "Where can I go that is fun.) Tactical Formula for General Conversational Management Keep thinking . Page 81 .Where can I go that is "fun. the topic "candidates" that were shown earlier).2 How To Steer Conversations. as we discussed earlier. You think of the "candidates" (the related topics or subjects that you can discuss) that serve you at the time.. Positive. Positive. .. TTP Mantra .2-1: Topic Turning Point Navigation for General Conversational Management No matter what subject you start talking about. and interesting"? Moment-to-moment.3. By manipulating TTPs from moment to moment. positive. So you just think to yourself "Where can I go that is fan.The overall direction of a conversation comes about due to a successive selection of TTPs. you can direct where the overall conversation goes. and interesting" and just move things in that direction. Which Of these are Fun.3.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 4.3. you make note of where you are in the conversation. positive. positive.2-1. Moment To Moment D8-T19 Look at the overall flow of a conversation and break it down to its smallest point that we can affect. you can always think of 6-8 other related topics or subjects. You then think of several ways you can go (the related topics. and Interesting? That is the direction to go! Candidate Topics Figure 4. How do you move things in that direction? You can: • Ask a question • Make a comment • Make a joke • Quote someone you heard. or something you read. For any subject. the TTP. and interesting?" Move the conversation in that direction. TTP options. Repeat. move things towards the related topics that are "Fun. positive. and Interesting". and interesting" (See Figure 4."Where can I go that is fun. and then you move things in that direction! Remember . • Etc. and then steer things in the correct direction.
Positive. you can work more towards certain topic areas. and Interesting". and Interesting! Figure 4.. "fun. you get to an overall "area" that will work.3.) Keep things moving in the direction of Fun. Page 82 .3 The Model With Strategy And Tactics In Place D8-T23 As you make TTP choice after TTP choice (See Figure 4.3-1: Moving Through Topics Using General Conversational Management Early in a conversation.3. positive.. Do this for a while. (See Figure 4.3. just keep thinking about where you can go that is "Fun. the most important thing to do is to focus on moving thing in a direction that is . Positive. 4.3.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Later in the conversation. but in the early part of the conversation.). You are steering things towards the direction that you want the conversation to go.3-1. and interesting".3-2.
is towards Fun.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course General Conversational Mgt Model No matter where you start. keep steering in the right direction and in many cases you WILL get towards the right area soon enough (and if not.4 Exercises and Assignments D8-T25 Exercises for General Conversational Management 1) Think of some conversations that you have been in recently. always move towards topics and subjects that are Fun. and write down the topic for each.3.3-2: General Conversational Management Model The most important direction to go. especially early in a conversation. or where you are. Positive. maybe that person is not someone that you want to talk to anyway). 4. what was the main topic? Topics Page 83 . Positive. Even if you temporarily move away from that direction or end up in an area that is not very positive or interesting. and Interesting!/ Figure 4. At some particular moment early in the conversation. and Interesting topics and subjects.3.
consider it a topic that leads to a TTP (copy each item above into the "Topic" area below). ask about. things you could comment on. directions you could "take" the conversation (these are the TTP Options. Topic TTP Options (Candidate Topics') Page 84 . Write each of those down. For each of those Topics. or Candidate Topics).Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course 2) Based on each of those topics. list 6-8 different ways you could go.
5) Practice again on each by moving things in the direction of the second item that was circled. making a statement. and Interesting")? Select two "candidates" and circle or highlight those two. which are the best? Which of these would move the conversation in a way that is best for you (think of "Fun. what would it have been like to have moved the conversation in the direction of the first item you circled? Practice that out loud for each Topic above. maybe by making a comment.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 3) Of the 6-8 different TTP Options you have written above for each Topic.. asking a question. Page 85 . etc. whatever it might take to move things in that direction. Positive. 4) For each Topic.
positive and interesting topics. Make it so that it becomes easy for you to come up with a list of "options" very quickly. It WILL get easier. Interesting. you can direct where the overall conversation goes. positive. Building on what we learned in the last section. we can start to direct the conversation into an even BETTER area.4 4. look for moments where things can be "steered" in a certain way. fascinating. the more YOU can and will become that guy! 4. D8-T33 D8-T33 We want the conversation to be more than just positive. You may start to find however. Instead of the more general area of fun.4. the conversation becomes more enjoyable for everyone. interesting. even at the start of a conversation. • By moving things in this way. they will not go down a path of having a fun. really be aware of the TTP opportunities in your day-to-day life. and people REALLY interested. Do this for a while until the process of finding 1 or 2 good "Ways to go" in a conversation (good TTP options) can happen very rapidly for you.1 ADVANCED CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Really Want. we are turning you into someone that people LIKE to talk to! You know the type of person that people enjoy talking to. you may have to think of 6-8 options. or without an overall strategy in mind). Maybe start out by looking at conversation after the fact. having conversations with. make a comment. At any moment you should be able to think "Where can I go with this?". the imagination moving. After a while. start to take the conversation there! Ask a question. We want to focus the aim of our conversational management skills even more. engaging. inquire about something. we want it to be really interesting.3. and spending time with? The type of guy that people seek out to spend time with? The more you do these types of exercises. we want things to get even more Page 86 . that no matter WHAT you do with some people. but the REAL key is to at least get to the point where you can very quickly think of at least 1 or 2 ways to go that are Fun. etc. 2) Now that you are able to quickly find 1 or 2 good TTP options. Just do what you can so that the TTP shifts in a direction that is fun." 4. we want to work with topics that get the emotions involved. Positive. You then have to wonder . interesting. don't worry. When talking to anyone.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Assignments for General Conversational Management 1) For the next week or so.Is that the sort of person you want to talk to and spend time with? Maybe not. At first. By manipulating TTPs from moment to moment. If this is a challenge for you. whatever it takes. and positive conversation.5 Summary D8-T32 Remember what was said earlier: • The overall direction of a conversation comes about due to a successive selection of TTPs (which normally occur at random. thinking "what COULD I have done. maybe offer an opinion. In general. where COULD I have taken things".
We use our strategy of working with the TTPs. (See Figure 4. there are many ways the conversation can move. Using General Conversational Management.4. and more involvement of the imagination. Strategic Formula for Advanced Conversational Management To direct the conversation into even BETTER areas. steer the conversation towards directions that engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way. So. more excitement. there were 4 main directions towards which a conversation may go.1-1: Advanced Conversational Management Focuses the Steering From the start of a conversation. you move it in ways that engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way. we now shift our strategy of "steering" things to direct the topics in a more focused manner using Advanced Conversational Management.) General Conversational Management takes the conversation into the Fun. and steer using Advanced Conversational Management Figure 4. Positive. we were able to move things in the direction of Fun. there are many ways to go. To move the conversation into more interesting areas.4.1-1. Now from that point. With that as a general strategy. Positive.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course interesting. Interesting area. From there. We move forward and want to get a more emotional tone. how do we work that in what we are doing moment-to-moment? How can we do things that will make that happen? Page 87 . So we narrow our focus. to "steer" things even more towards what we want. and Interesting.
4.4.3 The Model With Advanced Strategy And Tactics In Place D8-T38 (Before we move on to looking at the model.3-1 for an explanation. we shift the focus of how we navigate TTPs.2-1: Topic Turning Point Navigation for Advanced Conversational Management After using General Conversational Management for a while. TTP Fun.2-1. we look at the concept of the TTP.) TTP Mantra " Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner? Tactical Formula for Advanced Conversational Management Keep thinking . we can assume that we are talking about subjects which fit into the "Fun.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 4.4. (See Figure 4.4. See Figure 4. but now think "where can I go that will engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way".Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner? Move the conversation in that direction. and with that strategy in mind. Interesting Topics Which of these "Engage the Emotions and imagination in a Positive Way"? That is the direction to go! Candidate Topics Figure 4.4. With that established. and explain a bit more as to its meaning and interpretation. Positive. Positive. Repeat.2 Steering Conversations Moment To Moment using Advanced Conversational Management D8-T35 Again.) Page 88 . we need to change the way the model is shown. and Interesting" area.4. we need to use the TTP as a way to move things in the right direction.
the model above is what we used to show a starting point (1).3-1: Understanding the Conversational Management Model The "levels" shown in the models are not meant to be exact. where every "step" (TTP. so that the various stages of a conversation can be easily illustrated. For example. but a way to show a "trend". it may take ten. the graphics we will use will show an even more "condensed" version of this process. The locations of points (1).Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course Understanding the Conversational Management Model The model attempts to show a process that has many many steps. In practice. and it ends up at a certain area (2). Positive. At that point. When starting from ANY topic (1) to a place where you are firmly established for a period of time in a Fun. or topic shift) shown on the digram may represent many steps in an actual conversation. there can be a whole "tree" of possibilities leading from there. we are not showing that there are exactly "four steps" between points (1) and (2). For example. and Interesting conversation (2) may take four steps. From now on in the course. once again ending up with thousands of topics that could be discussed by the time you get through more topic shifts (3). Figure 4. not an exact number of steps or outcomes.) the conversation moves on for a while. or thirty. and (3) in the figure above (and in the next figure) helps to show this. This can result in so many possibilities (many thousands within a few steps) that it's important to look at these diagrams as a way to show "trend". with thousands upon thousands of possible possible routes and outcomes. these diagrams will indicate a VERY condensed version of the number of steps involved. But after using the general techniques (Fun. Positive. Page 89 . (2).4. etc. It may happen in ten minutes.
Although the diagram shows only 2 steps (for simplicity).3-2. and Interesting conversation (2).4. And of course while doing that. the conversation will get better and better. are used together to move forward in a conversation. This too can take any number of steps. you can see how General Conversational Management.3-2: Advanced Conversational Management Model Early in the conversation. This is shown between points (2) and (3). emotional topics. General Conversational Management techniques are used. Page 90 . feelings. and could be at any of thousands of topics after 6. you end up linking and associating many fascinating. exciting. 8. This also is followed for a series of steps and a period of time.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course We started at one topic. or 30 minutes. only a few of which are shown in the diagram. we focused the conversation towards moving things in a direction that is "Fun Positive and Interesting. we now focus more on moving in a direction that will "Engage the Emotions and Imagination in a Positive Way". or however long it takes to be firmly established in a Fun. The subjects will get more and more fascinating. If you refer to Figure 4. to yourself! Advanced Conversational Management Model Figure 4. This is shown from point (1) to point (2) in the diagram. As time goes on. and then Advanced Conversational Management. Then a shift is made towards focusing the conversation even more using Advanced Conversational Management. the conversation will get more and more of an "emotional" tone to it. and states. If you follow these two simple strategies together (and the tactical approach of simply watching the TTPs and moving things in the right way). 20.4. in practice it may be good to follow a series of topics for 5. Now the emphasis is on ways to "Engage the Emotions and Imagination in a Positive Way". After that has been established. Positive. For a while. 10 topic shifts. subjects. until it is firmly established that the conversation has engaged the emotions and imagination of the participant. 10. if you use the language tools which we learned about earlier in the course.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course 4. things you could comment on. and write down the topic for each. consider it a topic that leads to a TTP (copy each above into the "Topic" areas below). These should be conversations where it is already obvious that it is a fun. Write each of those down. Topic a. At some particular moment in that conversation. directions you could "take" the conversation (these are the TTP Options. list 6-8 different ways you could go. ask about. or Candidate Topics). and interesting conversation. positive. TTP Options (Candidate Topics') Page 91 .4 Exercises and Assignments D8-T39 Exercises for Advanced Conversational Management 1) Think of some conversations that you have been in recently. For each of those Topics.4. what was the main topic? Topics 2) Based on each of those topics.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Page 92 .
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 3) Of the 6-8 different TTP Options you have written above for each Topic. asking a question. inquire about something. This is best when applied to a conversation that is ALREADY fun. really be aware of the TTP opportunities in your day-to-day life. seductive things. So. making a statement.4. 5) Practice again on each by moving things in the direction of the second item that was circled. etc. what would it have been like to have moved the conversation in the direction of the first item you circled? Practice that out loud for each Topic above. even things with some degree of sensual connotation to them.5. you may have to think of 6-8 options.. make a comment. maybe by making a comment.1 Summary MORE ADVANCED CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT More About Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Really Want. fascinating.5 4. So. 4) For each Topic. and interesting. start to take the conversation there! Ask a question. At first.5 4. what next? At some point in the conversation. but the REAL key is to at least get to the point where you can very quickly think of at least 1 or 2 ways to go that "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way". which 1 or 2 would tend to "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way"? Which ones move things in a way that is best for you? Select two "candidates" and circle or highlight these two. 4. we focus further on the TTP options! Page 93 . It WILL get easier. don't worry. where COULD I have taken things". D8-T46 D8-T47 D8-T47 As you can see. positive. Do this for a while.. 2) Now that you are able to quickly find 1 or 2 good TTP options for yourself that "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way". whatever it might take to move things in that direction. maybe offer an opinion. Maybe start out by looking at conversation after the fact. once again. thinking "what COULD I have done. whatever it takes. until the process of finding 1 or 2 ways to go that "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way" in a conversation can happen very rapidly for you. but be especially aware of wanting to move things to "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way".. we want to steer things more towards romantic. Assignments for Advanced Conversational Management 1) For the next week or so. we are "steering" things more and more in a direction that we wish to go. Just do what you can so that the TTP shifts in a direction that can "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way". If this is a challenge for you.
The focus now is upon topics that get you closer towards Romantic. fascinating.3 The Model With More Advanced Strategy And Tactics In Place D8-T52 We are just closing in. and associating YOU with them! (See Figure 4. Fascinating.5. 4.5. and then topics that engage the emotions and imagination. steer the conversation towards romantic. and seductive things.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Strategic Formula for More Advanced Conversational Management To further direct the conversation into even BETTER areas. fascinating.2-1. and followed the other strategies and tactics shown earlier.5. seductive things is much easier after you have first move towards fun. This may seem odd or hard to do.2-1: Topic Turning Point Navigation for More Advanced Conversational Management After using General and Advanced Conversational Management.3-1. Seductive things Tactical Formula for More Advanced Conversational Management Keep thinking . seductive things?" Move the conversation in that direction.5. if you have been in a conversation for a while.2 Steering Conversations Using More Advanced Conversational Management D8-T49 TTP Mantra (See Figure 4. and focusing more and more towards areas and topics that work.5. However. positive and interesting thing. Repeat. seductive things?" Figure 4. Moving towards romantic.) "Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic. fascinating. This gets her mind into thinking more and more about these things. fascinating.) Page 94 . you will have taken things in the right direction and this will be much easier. 4."Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic. then the focus shifts again towards directing things in a specific way.
After that type of conversation has been established (3). Early on. there is a different focus at each stage. General Conversational Management techniques place the focus on selecting items that are Fun. and Seductive. Positive. the focus moves towards selecting items based on More Advanced Conversational Management. moving to point (3). and Interesting. Fascinating.. shown from point (1) to (2).Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course More Advanced Conversational Management Model Figure 4. moving to point (4) Page 95 .3-1: More Advanced Conversational Management Model As the conversation progresses.5. Then the Advanced Conversational Management Techniques place the focus more upon items that involve the Emotions and Imagination in a Positive Way. which targets topics and subjects that are Romantic.
Moreover.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course 4. then a sensual one.MAGIC! However that is NOT the way it works in the real world. Too many guys are too caught up in this one-shot dream of traveling once across the model and getting an amazing result. Page 96 .6 CONVERSATIONAL FRACTIONATION D9-T1 Using these Conversational Management skills in the real world may be quite different in practice from the way most guys "think" it will happen. and then an emotional one.1-1.6. and then . will work in your favor. to a positive one. that they will get an AMAZING reaction in their first movement across the Model. the way it really DOES happen.1 The 1-Shot Beeline Fallacy D9-T2 Guys assume that they will travel from a general topic. This hardly ever ever happens. 4.) The Dream that Does Not Happen! Figure 4.6. (See Figure 4. and get things to be more and more fascinating and exciting.1-1: The Dream of a 1-Shot Path To Success! A common misperception is that many guys think that if they can just move a conversation from the start.6.
e) Then move back (towards the left side of the model) This may happen because: • The person you are talking to does that (she asks a question) • Or maybe you do it (just to lighten things up) f) Then start again. the conversation ends up being very interesting and fascinating! 4.6. you take a conversation from the early stages through the process. you may jump back just several steps in our Conversational Management Process.3 Using Conversational Fractionation D9-T5 Start at some normal topic and move through the model towards the right.. move on to the next step.. you are always moving towards positive topics.. You might do that on your own.. Of if you can't seem to get to a good place.) a) b) c) d) Page 97 . This actually works better! We are actually using Fractionation. and fascinating and seductive topics.31. Then you "back up" to some extent (even all the way back to a very general topic area) and then move forward across the model again. or maybe the conversation shifts back to that place due to something she says. Maybe you move all the way back to a very "normal" topic (which would be all the way on the left side of the model). You just start the process again.. Because no matter where you start from.6. and then at some point..2 How Fractionation Works D9-T3 The real world has stops. Have fun. goes for some distance through the model (maybe all the way through).. no matter how the conversation jumps around. No problem. If you get to a very good place. you back off. Then at some point. So.. and then . starts. This is where a process is done repeatedly over and over. stay there and talk about it for a while. emotional and imaginative topics. This actually ADDS to the power and effectiveness of what you are doing. restarts.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 4. Start at any topic (you are on the far left side of the Model) Move forward towards the right. g) Do the whole process over and over. Use the language tools. Just start the process again. here is how this works. Great! Talk about that for a while. When we say "go back". No problem. In this way. etc. (See Figure 4. And again.6. Maybe you start from a very general topic and get all the way through the model towards a very very fascinating topic or subject. So. no matter where you start. you go back towards something more "normal". using the Conversational Management techniques Get as far through the model as you can.. moving through the model towards the right. You back up to a more general topic.. Maybe several times. The conversation starts.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Conversational Fractionation at Work Figure 4. As things move forward from (1).4 Dead Ends Come Back To Life! D9-T6 With this new strategy of using Conversational Fractionation. it ends up being fun.3-1: How Conversation Fractionation Works on the Model Follow the conversation as it moves from (1) to (12). over time. there is a continued movement up and into better and better areas of conversation. The overall trend is that.6. that no matter WHAT you talk about.6. and fascinating! 4. Fractionation happens at times because even when you may be at a fairly good place for a while (8). This is not a problem. interesting. simply back up (3) and then try moving into a better direction (4). there is no such thing as a conversational "Dead End"! Page 98 . at times maybe they move towards an area that is not too good (2). You become one of those fascinating guys. it's not a bad idea to back up a bit (9) and then move forward again. As time goes on (5-12) the conversation gets into better and better areas.
(think of your TTP options). etc. No problem.7...1 • Conversational Management Approach Start on just about ANY subject. and get the effect. Where can I go that is fun. have more material to use in conversations in the future! 4. When on good topics.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course If you happen to take a "wrong turn" somehow and get into an area of discussion that is boring.7.7. and use the Strategy and Tactics of the Conversational Management techniques! Look at "Dead Ends" as being just like a bad turn on a road.7 CONVERSATIONAL OVERVIEW AND REVIEW D9-T7 So. and interesting? Move things in that direction. with you! 4.. or maybe negative. stay there for a while. how do we pull this together? 4..3 Summary D9-T10 Go have fun with these tools! Page 99 .. Do that for a while and then think .. seductive things? Move things in that direction. use the language tools. o If you get to a good subject or topic. Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner? Move things in that direction. Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic.. fascinating. and go down another path! 4. positive. this can happen. o Comment on what is around o Mention common items. use the language tools as much as possible! D9-T8 • • • • • • • • • Keep moving the conversation into these interesting fascinating areas . uninteresting.. —* The entire time: o If you hit a "dead end". Just back up. back up a few steps. talked more.2 What If The Outcome Is Not What You Expected? D9-T9 Despite your best efforts. you might have just found out that they are NOT someone you want to spend time with! That's not a total loss because you STILL learned more. and the person becomes interested and fascinated. you just back up. • What if you can't make the conversation positive? • What if she always points out the negative aspect? • What if there is NO emotional engagement at ALL? Well.. or what you both have in common Move forward with the Strategies and Tactics in mind. Do that for a while and then think .
.0 TOPICS D9-T11 What do you talk about? As the conversation gets more interesting. and that statement (regarding having actually talked to someone about the topics) will be TRUE! So.) Before you can use the language tools with new subjects that you are learning about. Can you talk passionately about something? Anything? Hopefully.1 Themes are a way through a discussion or through the "tree of subjects" that we showed earlier. Most men may not be very familiar with many of the topics that we REALLY want to get into. yes! How well can you talk about topics that YOU are passionate about while using many of the language tools we talked about in the earlier parts of the course? If you can do that very well .". and then the more "material" you will have. we have talked about managing conversations. However.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 5. and it's even better if you are passionate about those topics. the more you talk to people about such things. fascinating. the easier it will get. fun. Topics • • 5. some practice. to get the best effect you will have to be a PART of that conversation and familiar with the topics that may come up. what can we do here in this course to help you? We have talked about the way to talk and use language. What do you talk about? There is no substitute for experience. so that YOU have some material. However. TOPICS OF ENTHUSIASM AND PASSION D9-T14 What are you passionate about? Few things are more compelling in a person than for them to be passionate about something (hopefully many things) in life. the more familiar you will be with these topics. A topic is a particular area of discussion that is taking place in a moment. if using those language tools is problem for you.great! It's easier to use the language tools if you are discussing topics with which you are familiar. Talking about these topics may be a challenge for many men. then you may want to go back in those earlier sections. Themes vs. You want to be able to discuss these topics easily. You will be able to say things like "I was talking to someone about this the other day. Now we want you to become familiar with topics that will really work well for you! We are going to work with some of these topics. go ahead and practice! (Or maybe do that the next time you go through the course. In the meantime. this is something we can and will work on with you.. and closer towards the subjects that will really serve your intent. and while talking about subjects and topics that YOU are really passionate about. fascinating. and some familiarity with this type of thing. The more experience you get. and THEY said. especially as they get more interesting. you should be able to use them with subjects in which you are already interested! Page 101 .
at least.2 SEDUCTION ORIENTED TOPICS D9-T15 In the context of this course (and your intent in talking with . or sports. can create an AMAZING effect! When you do get a conversation into an area near an SOT. You want to be able to discuss topics that deal on some level with Seduction.) Page 102 . but a good number of them. work it.Topics that bring up images and thoughts that are romantic. or. Topics that access emotions. stay there as long as you can! Talk about it. How good are you at the earlier sections that dealt with the language tools? It may be a good idea to go back over those sections. Seduction Oriented Topics (SOTs) ... Examples of SOTs • Connections • Going for it • Making good decisions • Surrendering to feelings • Getting excited • Feeling excited • Trusting your judgment • Taking chances • Indulgence • Maturity • Good decisions • . You may talk about cars. 5. but doing so while using the language tools. or topics that are very close to that concept. feelings. and emphasize discussing topics in which YOU are interested and passionate about. (Every guy has his favorites and ones that work best for him. in the right way Use the language tools! You want to be familiar with these topics (SOTs) and able to discuss them easily: maybe not ALL of them. or the office.. or cleaning the toilet. judge for yourself. and link it to you! When • • • • • you are at or near an SOT: Use the correct tone of Voice Pace and Lead correctly Link things to you Point at the right times. Your point is to get to. someone) some topics are easier to work with than others. and seductive. but how effective are those as subjects given the "purpose" of the discussion? You want to discuss topics and things which deal with seduction. etc.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course So. or near. sensual. The conversational management sections will help you to move the conversation in a way that will get you near these topics areas.. SOTs are the "end goals" when it comes to managing or directing a conversation. a topic that is an SOT.just TALKING about these can create a good effect. in some ways.. excitement. These are called "Seduction Oriented Topics"..
or anything like that. 3) Practice talking about each aloud. keep it there. Meaning.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course These topics may seem foreign to you. bring up images and thoughts that may work for you. Or are taking!) . Assignments for Seduction Oriented Topics 1) Pay attention to conversations in your life (even things you hear on the radio. talk about something you heard. you JUST need to be able to talk. Think of SOME way to discuss these. read.Are you able to somehow relate to these in your own life? Maybe something you read or heard? Maybe questions you can ask? ANYTHING?!?!? You do not need to "know" a lot about these topics or be an expert. or in movies. using as many of the language tools as you can. or comment on them! Talk aloud for several minutes about each.. You can use some of those that were listed earlier if you wish. use as many of the language tools as you can. Or. the more you practice using the tools. and without "thinking" about the language tools. or seduction per se. ask about them. the more you work with the materials. or joke about them. you will be able to just "talk" about the subject while using the tools that are available. the easier it will get! Strategic Formula for Seduction Oriented Topics SOTs are topics that. or overhear from others) and listen for when any of these SOTs come up in conversation. Write down your list of SOTs. the more you practice. but the more you think about them. Don't worry about talking to women. and while there. by there very nature. Exercises for Seduction Oriented Topics 1) Build your own list of SOTs. Eventually. Think about other topics you have heard mentioned in this program. and discuss these subjects. or ask questions. Get the conversation there. easily. and hopefully add some of your own. Seduction Oriented Topics 2) You must become familiar with these! You must be able to talk about them. or on TV.. hopefully some way that involves you and your own life. have stories about them.. and the more you talk to and with people about them. or even watched in a movie! (Or heard in a course that you took . the easier it will be to "riff" on these using the language tools. and also topics that you have heard in other materials and products that you have. Page 103 .
That is understandable. and easily come up with 6-8 related topics. They started and became more and more familiar with these topics. this process must start somewhere.3 EXPANDED SEDUCTION ORIENTED TOPICS . and frankly. You start to listen and take notice of when these are discussed. Maybe ask some questions about things that deal with your SOTs. Really! Learning to discuss such things may start out slowly. "the other day I heard someone talking about. or even when anything CLOSE to one of your SOTs is discussed. You listen more to when they are discussed.."). after having worked with hundreds of guys. They did it. That makes you really think about them. It may start a bit slowly and awkwardly. this is one of the key challenges that many guys face. ask what something means. and makes it easier for you to talk about them.. Page 104 . However.Talk about these subjects and topics! Make a point to enter into a discussion when one of your SOTs is mentioned. Because of that. So can you. but this time with SOTs. 2) Now . what people think. it gets easier to enter into more conversations that deal with these topics. These are called Expanded SOTs (SOTXs). The more you hear. Make special note of topics that are CLOSE or similar to these SOTs in some way. quote. anything at all! Talk. discuss. ask. etc.SOTXs D9-T24 What if you had not just 10 ways of discussing "Seduction Oriented" subjects. 5. but as long as you start it.. ask an opinion. Use as many of the language tools as you can. Many guys who can now talk about these things VERY easily and comfortably started from a place of having NO idea of what to say! They changed.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Listen to what is being said. make a comment. it WILL get easier. You do a few exercises to talk about them. That's what we want to do here. SOT Summary I KNOW that these topics may seem foreign to you. See? We are working on a process to get you to become more comfortable and familiar with these things. Then you get to hear MORE people talk about them. and move through these exercises and assignments. We learned how you can move from any topic. However. what is said. or even just TRY to do so. (As in. but we are walking you through (at least the first steps of) the process to make this easier: • • • • • • • • • • • You have made a list of SOTs. and start to get your brain working on them. I can tell you that it DOES get easier and easier to be able to talk about these things. the more you listen. but had even more? Maybe 50? What if that was easy and familiar for you? Think back to how we looked at topics earlier. then the more material YOU will have to talk about. And that gives you MORE material to talk about! Which make it easier for you to enter into more conversations about these subjects and topics. That gives YOU more familiarity with discussing them. show interest.
you can talk about that for while. but can you think of 6-8 different aspects of this? (Remember what we did in the earlier sections. That just makes it easier for our example below). coworkers. or only one aspect of that to discuss (connections in a romantic or sensual context). and build a whole list of very similar things to talk about -which are SOTXs! For example..with pets .. places.. Look at the list above. and things that can be discussed.. pets.. comes up in a conversation.with someone while on vacation . how easy would it be to talk about how you CONNECT with those? And if you talk about Page 105 . For any given SOT. you now have 6-8 ways to discuss it. They think of only one way of talking about that subject.with your teammates Figure 5.with a girlfriend . That is one subject.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course Expanding on a Topic Area "Connections" is an SOT. if friends.. Instead of worrying about getting to that one topic (SOT) in a certain way. . there are many different types or examples of connecting to people..with friends .. it's easy to think of several different aspects of that topic or related topics.with coworkers . However as we see here... see Figure 5..3-1: How SOTs are related to an SOTXs.... you can take any SOT.with someone you just met .with music ..3-1.. (You do not really need to list "connections with" for each. family. how we discussed a Topic Turning Point?) If Connections is a particular subject.. etc.with family . can you think of different aspects of that? Parts of Connections? Questions about Connections? Ways of experiencing Connections? People or things with which you can experience Connections? By asking those types of questions (to yourself). SOT Connections SOTX Connections with family Connections with friends Connections with coworkers Connections with pets Connections with a girlfriend Connections with someone you just met Connections with someone while on vacation Connections with music Connections with your teammates Many guys worry about talking about something like "Connections". Then. (Does that diagram look familiar?) If "Connections" is an SOT. the SOTX list consists of all of these items shown in the diagram and listed below.
3-2. c. etc.) Family Friends Coworkers Pets Connections A girlfriend Someone you just met Someone met on vacation Music Teammates Figure 5. or how that topic can be experienced. all of a sudden there are many MORE ways to get to these really GREAT topics! Exercises f o r Expanded Seduction Oriented T o p i c s 1) Take the SOT list you had earlier (copy those down into the first column below. ask a question. SOTs " SOTXs List Page 106 .... This is your SOTX list. how to connect with people. b. (Yes. if someone is talking about pets. and how you (or someone else) can connect with a pet.3-2: SOTXs Can Lead Into SOTs If any of the topics in the SOTX list comes up in conversation. you are to list 5 (at least) related topics.. then you can shift towards ANOTHER type of "connection" very easily! (See Figure 5. this is a TTP diagram in reverse!) For example. you can be as close as one step away from an SOT. or maybe even someone.. then you can shift to talking about "how you can connect with a pet" fairly easily. Just make a comment. a. or a special person. If you talk about that for a while. or different aspects of that topic. it's very easy to then shift.) and for each SOT. that you just met! When you expand SOTs in this way.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course THAT (how you connect in that manner) for a while. point out an example regarding pets..to .
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Page 107 .
Talk about that SOTX for a moment or two.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course 2) Now for each SOTX. you talk about pets. then about connecting with pets.) 3) Do the same thing again. but now do so while using the language tools. You have 50 SOTXs that you are now familiar with as well. practice talking about it out loud. (Like the earlier example. That gives you a LOT of flexibility in conversations! Page 108 . and see if you can then focus what you are saying towards the SOT itself. Step back and look at what you have done! You have 10 SOTs with which YOU are familiar. then about connecting in general.
or anything like them mentioned. Page 109 . However. and then built upon that step by step. .with coworkers . Good speakers. It ALL gets easier! 2) Start to "direct" the conversations you encounter where your SOTXs are mentioned.. spotting these opportunities get easier and easier. the easier it will be to notice SOTXs. if you hear any of them mentioned. If anything like an SOTX comes up in a conversation.. We have broken these down... The techniques that you have learned are the sort of things that many people do naturally. In addition.4-1: SOTXs Are The Pathways To SOTs SOTXs are an easy way to get towards SOTs... broke it into bits and pieces that you can learn and do as exercises.with someone while on vacation . use the language tools if and whenever you can...with your teammates Family Friends Coworkers Pets A girlfriend Someone you just met Someone met on vacation Music Teammates Connections This is how we developed SOTXs This is the most useful way of thinking of SOTXs Figure 5.4 CONVERSATIONAL MODEL WITH SOTXs. and move the conversation towards SOTs.with music .. "I didn't list that SOTX. that process can work both ways. you know that you are very close to getting near a subject area that will work very well for you. concept of "topics related to a topic" in many many places. it's about getting YOU comfortable and familiar with these topics. but it IS related to an SOT that I have worked with". Summary You now have MORE material to work with than you ever thought possible! This is not about memorizing.. 5.... it is easy to then move the conversation towards topics that will work better for you (SOTs).with family .. You will start to notice this. Maybe you will even start to notice SOTXs that were not even ON your list. You may think. The more familiar you are with these subjects.. especially politicians and activists..with friends .. The real usefulness of this is when you reverse the order as shown in Figure 5. use such techniques a LOT. SOTXs are now like "conversational landmarks" for you in terms of navigating a conversation. .with a girlfriend .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Assignments for Expanded Seduction Oriented Topics 1) Look at all of your SOTXs! That's a LOT of subjects! Pay attention in your life to see how often any of those items come up in conversation (or maybe you just hear them somewhere).with someone you just met .with pets Connections .4-1. modeled the process arid the steps involved. D9-T32 We discussed how to develop an SOTX list from an SOT.. See if you can move the conversation a bit towards the SOT itself. The more you work with this.
that is not an abbreviation or exaggeration. there are really 50 SOTXs and 10 SOTs shown . However in the figure above. this will start to happen for you. and 50 SOTXs (in the earlier exercises) you now have many many SOTXs with which YOU are familiar! More importantly.4-2: Your Multiple Pathways to SOTs! Now that you have worked with 10 SOTs. Figure 5. you have started to train yourself to "recognize" these landmarks. and then towards SOTs. As the topics get better and better.the number that YOU have actually worked with so far! Since SOTXs and SOTs are the "goals" in terms of managing a conversation. we can then show them as part of our Conversational Model. and for you to just start to "recognize" these things on your own . and done the exercises and assignments. If you have followed the program. to be able to notice when you are talking about things which are "close to" topics that will work well for you. The point here (again) is not to memorize the SOTs. you now see how easy it can be to move over to an SOT! In fact. Page 110 . that this process will now be easier than you may have imagined.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course So whenever you are having a conversation. you have already worked with 10 SOTs and 50 SOTXs as shown in Figure 5. In many of the diagrams. you have practiced with so many of these SOTXs.without "thinking" about them. you will get closer and closer to SOTXs. SOTXs SOTs Figure 5.4-3 shows this in the model itself. After all. or the SOTXs..4-2. It's to have you practice and become familiar with them. we have had to compress or simplify them quite a bit and show only a fraction of the actual steps and numbers involved so that the diagrams do not become too large or complex. and anything like an SOTX comes up in the discussion.
SOTXs are a pathway to make that easier. then you can simply move things towards a topic that is very seduction-oriented! The point is not to have a "list" in mind. just follow the steps listed earlier in the Conversational Management sections. you can start from just about ANY topic and get to GREAT topics! It's easy. and ANY TOPIC. and using this type of approach you will have fascinating conversations with people that lead to where YOU want to go! (See Figure 5.5 THE COMPLETE CONVERSATIONAL MODEL D9-T33 Start from any topic and get to where you want! Yes.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course SOTs in the Conversational Management Model The end goal is to get to. You can start from almost ANYWHERE. then start to pay attention for SOTXs. SOTXs SOTs Listen for SOTXs Anything near or related to an SOT.4-3: SOTs Are THE Goals in Conversational Management As you move through a conversation.. Move towards SOTs. 5. or anything that is "related" to an SOT. Period. When you get to an SOTx. which are topics near or related to seduction (a step or two away from SOTs).5-1.) Page 111 . it's that you have trained yourself to recognize things that are SOTs. you start to "listen" for topics that are SOTXs. Then move the conversation towards an SOT! This works. and topics that are close to that (SOTXs). or as close as you can towards SOTs. Stay there for a while if you can! Figure 5.
5-1: The Complete Conversational Management Model (continued on next page) Page 112 .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Figure 5.
. Fractionate If you take a wrong turn. interesting .. or SOTX.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Figure 5...Romantic. exciting..Fun. or very close! Page 113 . Steer towards .Engaging the emotions and imagination in a positive way . Steer towards . start over! Assignment! 1) Try it! Start directing conversations using the conversational management model. Especially when at or near SOTXs and SOTs. fascinating. back up! If you move back to a general topic. seductive things Direct the Conversation Pay attention when Good Subjects come up (SOTXs) Listen for anything a step or two away from an SOT Move towards SOTs Stay there as long as you can Use The Language Tools! As much as possible..5-1: The Complete Conversational Management Model (continued) Start a Conversation Manage the Conversation Move the Conversation in a Good Direction Steer towards . and see how easy it is to get to some good topic that is an SOT.
THAT ends up being a very effective way to create "patterns". Once you actually play the game though.Many of the details of driving a car are things you just "do". Amplify these feelings and states by talking. or navigation. • Instead. or "how can I bring up a pattern that I know". clarifying. and as "a way of speaking". that's the key. • Driving . Its just a "type" of talking that you can (and will be able to) use when you feel it is appropriate. A representative sample. • While talking to a woman. certain actions. or series of actions.1 PATTERNS PATTERN OVERVIEW D10-T1 What is a pattern? • A plan.You don't play the entire game ahead of time. Patterns are just examples of the use of these tools. She may take the conversation into better places that you could have predicted. and being aware of when you DO get to an area of conversation that does allow you to use a pattern. handling the gas pedal. think about having a conversation (and managing it correctly). With this new approach to learning and using these tools. The Pattern Formula in detail.2 PATTERN FORMULA D10-T7 Tactical Formula for Patterns While talking to a woman. These smaller skills become automatic and you focus instead of driving. or "how can I bring this pattern up". Don't think of "how can I get to the pattern". We practice specific parts of areas of the skills we wish to use later on. we work in that manner. • Maybe talk to a woman and allow HER to bring up things that end up working well in pattern-like language. It's best to just think of patterns as examples. get her to "experience" good feelings and states o Use the Conversational Management Techniques to get there o Get her to think about good and/or exciting feelings Page 115 . the clutch.0 6. get her to "experience" good feelings and states. In the same manner. 6. You don't have to think about moving the wheel. Use the language tools. Present a Call to action. The navigation is handled through our use of Conversational Management techniques. diagram. or model to be followed in making things. etc.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course 6. You practice bits and pieces of the sport. A New way of thinking about the use of patterns • The wrong way is to talk to someone and to keep thinking. or could say. • An example of what you can say. "A plan" or "model". you make decisions on-the-spot as to what to do and how to proceed. asking. Examples/Analogies: • Sports . we have practiced the small details (language skills) so that these are automatic. "how can I get to my pattern". plus these areas will work for HER because SHE selected them (in a manner of speaking) • Talk and manage the conversation into an area that DOES work for you. Link and associate these feelings to you.
if you just "drop" a pattern into the conversation.. The good ways to use these are as teaching and learning tools. o Use "this" and "these" (be aware of that and those as well) o Point and mark appropriately Present a Call to action o "Do it now" language o Create a Challenge o Create an Opportunity o Talk about the chance to "Seize the moment" o A simple add-on to the Language Tools There are two main ways of doing patterns. don't focus TOO much on them. and do. and the proper context is not created.. pre-rehearsed. 6. • The interesting topic that she and you are discussing o what is happening o what you know Page 116 . and to use what is needed in the moment. In THAT case . However." etc. "this person. or things you have read. and have them there for your use if and when the correct situation comes up. Some times that does happen. Therefore it is best to maybe have some of these memorized. Pre-written. but they assume that you are in a conversation where they will work and be somewhat "appropriate" to what is being discussed. canned patterns are good. what you need to do is to look at. for her to elaborate and describe o Repeating back what she has said o Provide examples from your own life o Provide examples from friends. So. etc Link and associate those feelings to you o Use the Language Tools o Use linkage phrases like "now with me".4 PATTERN RIFFING IN REAL-TIME D10-T13 This is the ability to just create pattern language on-the-fly. sound quite strange. 6. Their best use is when you use the Conversational Management techniques and then find that the conversation just happens to get to or near a pattern that you DO happen to know already. asking.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • • o Get her feeling good and/or exciting feelings o Get her experiencing (or recall the experience of) good and/or exciting feelings o Get her to think about things that she wants or desires Amplify these feelings and states by talking.these pre-written or canned patterns can work very well. clarifying o Use the Language Tools o Asking her for info. "Canned" patterns. and real-time "Riffing"..3 CANNED PATTERNS D10-T12 These are the pre-rehearsed. But. pre-written patterns that you have seen and heard. when you are talking to a woman. The problem is if you are SO focused on just "getting to the pattern" that you know (or even one of many that you know) then it's difficult to have a good conversation. In the real world. because doing so may work against you. they can. these canned patterns DO have some usefulness. many times it does not. and that the woman will react to what the patterns is about.
looking and listening for positive feelings. Wanting to take action or seize an opportunity Always • • • • See the pattern here? We are in general. and and use the language tools. • Talk about these things or listen to you talk about these things • get her to think about these things • get her to feel these things • get her to link them to you. Page 117 . Use the language tools so that YOU become associated with those things. and sensual things. using the tools. and actions in the conversation... interesting. states.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • o what she is reacting to o and discuss things which are appropriate. it really IS that easy! look for: Positive emotions and feeling Positive sensations (as in physical ones) Exciting feelings. exciting. • Use some "act now" languaging. Yes. emotions. Then you have a conversation and. get her to. Then we use those as a basis for discussion. THE BEST PATTERN IS THIS: • • Get her to talk and think about positive.
We really are focused upon changing you. a. you will benefit. Now we can look from the "top-down". Direct and/or link those feelings towards you. Use the Language Tools 5. Get the conversation into good subjects (SOTXs. Whether its your first.4 BE WILLING AND PREPARED TO PUT ENERGY INTO THIS COURSE.5 CONGRATULATIONS! WELL DONE! D10-T29 Page 119 . 7. 3. SOTs) 4. It really is up to you. DO THE EXERCISES.3 LISTEN.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course 7. 7. D10-T28 The more energy and effort you put into this. Engage her emotions and imagination in a positive way. a. focusing first on small details. comfort in. AND FOLLOW THE COURSE. Both you and her talk! 2. Create a willingness. and then building up to bigger and bigger pieces. 7. but the method of approaching it is very different. Keep the conversation going. and really take the time to do the exercises. and/or compulsion to act a. Keep her there and keep talking! a.1 REVIEW AND SUMMARY REVIEW D10-T18 The course has followed a "bottom-up" approach to training. D10-T27 Listen to the full explanations. and view an overall strategy. of fourteenth time through. fifth. Direct the conversation in a way that takes you toward good topics a.0 7. -' d. 1. Talk about something positive and interesting c.2 SUMMARY D10-T26 This may be similar to information you have heard in the past. and the more engaged you are in the process. Fractionate if and when needed. the greater your results will be. Use the conversational management techniques b. Use the Language Tools 7. and how you speak. Use the conversational management techniques b.
EXAMPLES. EXAMPLES Dll-Tl The discussions presented on the audio for this section are intentionally "casual" to familiarize you even more with the use of these tools. and provide you with some real-world examples of their use. Page 121 .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 8.0 EXAMPLES.
powerful... • What's it like when . to be cool. • Passionate or Boring? o o o • LANGUAGE TOOLS A N T D E T A I L S o Adjectives And Adverbs Use more adjectives and adverbs in your speech to appeal to and excite the emotional side of the listener. and charismatic presence. • If you were to ... and to "soften " the way in which something is said.... so that their feelings. o o Page 123 .. • Nose.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course APPENDIX 1 Course "Cheat Sheet" • SPEAKING POINTERS o The "Cool" Factor You don't have to be cold. • Slow. • If I were to . to convey a sense of drama and intrigue in what you are saying in a way that "captivates "people and makes them want to listen to you. Fast. Voice Tone And Tonality Use your best tone of voice (speaking from your chest) to convey a relaxed. and processes awaken. or Chest? Pacing And Pausing Use variations in pace. • Instantaneously " Suddenly • Find Yourself • Convince Yourself • Suppose • Imagine " Mysterious (-ly) • Wonder (-ous) (-ously) Weasel Phrases Use Weasel Phrases to keep the conversation going. use Adjectives And Adverbs Trance Words Help to get the subconscious mind of the listener to be more of apart of your conversation... Pause? Energy And Enthusiasm Using energy and enthusiasm when speaking so that people can become energized and enthusiastic about listening to and being with you. allowing you to say more (and maybe more provocative things) about a subject. emotions. " As you. and well-placed pauses. • Be descriptive. • Have you ever . Mouth.
Easy Anchoring When the person you are talking with displays a positive feeling of some type.. These. Point to you • Negative statement.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course o Embedded Commands Use embedded commands repeatedly and in the proper context. That. • Point Or Touch On Positive —* o o o • LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES o Pace And Lead Pacing and Leading allows you "be " in the conversation for a while and gain rapport and information. etc. touch them to help anchor it to you. intrigue. Say "these". • Whenever you say something positive.. Those • Positive statement. Point away. point or gesture towards yourself. to create a compelling will on the part of the listener follow you and listen to you. Say "that". Easy Linking Expanded Pointing With This. • Use "That" and "Those" when referring to anything negative. • Move! Point! Linking Gestures Towards And Away • Whenever you say something negative. Point away • Positive statement. gesture. link them to you so that YOU become something and someone that they feel good about • Now with me • In me • In myself • with this • these • this belief • these feelings Easy-Linking • Use "This" and "These" when referring to anything positive.. Point to you • Negative Say "those". • Can you do this now. motion. Say "this". point or gesture away. a smile. laugh. Linking After getting someone to experience good feelings and emotions. and accentuate what you are saying in order to be more compelling as a speaker and to get even more attention from your listener or audience. o o • MORE TOOLS o Pointing And Gestures Move. interest. allowing you to move things more in your favor later on Page 124 .
and incorporate the language tools • This thing vs that thing • How two things are similar • How two things are different • Good . experiences. or giving an example. keep the discussion focused on a topic that serves your purposes. b. Listing • General Listing General Listing is a way to quickly provide several reason. The more Y. understanding. the More Z. or thoughts) use "More and More " as a way to string them together (and increase your chances of that happening • The more X. Compare And Contrast Use this technique to keep the conversation going. thoughts. the More Y. the More Y. B. and C When making a point.) • Then you will "Y" Where "Y" is something you want them to experience (Lead) o Give Them A Reason Giving a reason will make people more apt to do things for you and agree with you. "List" several things or examples which support your point. • Request X because (of) Y. the more Y. • a. acknowledgement. you can get away with an outrageous or very direct option by burying that option in the middle of a List. • Topics and Subjects • Mindset or Frame of Mind • Current Reality • As (while) you are "X" (Pace) Where "X" is something that is true in their current reality (perceptions. or to maybe see if you can get someone to agree to it! • a.another option o o o Page 125 . and c When giving examples or options to someone. etc. LAST • Burying Items Listing . but mention the one which YOU want to put the most emphasis on. "List" several things briefly in order. etc. The More Z. and/or interest.Bad • One option .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Show agreement. Then start to move or shift things in a different way. B. • As you X. statement. in order to provide more power to what you are saying • At The End Listing at The End is a way to provide several options (which may differ) but to emphasize the option that YOU want. statement. which support your point • A. etc. a way that you want. or giving an example. and C When making a point.Burying Items is a way to mention an outrageous or very direct option for "testing" purposes. More And More If you want to lead someone through a series of steps (actions.
o Opportunities And Challenges • Find out what someone wants. idea. Mini-Challenges • You seem. or fun. —* • • • Page 126 .. even when the other person claims or demonstrates that such parts are NOT there • For every part of a person that will work against you. Parts Of A Person Use Parts of a Person as a way to find... discuss.. and evoke favorable states. • If you are able to ... • Link good thoughts.. and beliefs. • You may . • You might... • Take any subject.... • Break it down into its component parts and discuss them.. assume there is a part that will work WITH you. • You might see .. feelings. • The smart people I know. • etc. feelings and emotions. to be a way for them to get what they want. • If you can . feelings and emotions to yourself. etc).\ Universal Wants You can assume that most people want these. • Using Their Own Processes • Find or assume what someone wants • Create an opportunity for them to get it or demonstrate they have it • Make that "demonstration" work in your favor. • Find a way to map what YOU want. • You seem as if. • You seem like . or point in a discussion. • Maybe you can .... • I wonder if you can .... • Confidence • Maturity • Security • Self-Directed • Intelligence • Control Particular Wants What does she want to have..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course o Parts • • Parts Of A Subject Discussing many of the parts of a subject keeps the conversation going. or show it.. do it. • Challenge them to demonstrate it. or want to be perceived as having? • Talk to them and find out. • Are you able to .. • Use the language tools in the discussion. or adventurous. • Challenge them to do that. can (use smart. allowing you time to gather information and link yourself to good thoughts..
Consider the wants and needs that a person may have . positive... • Navigation Don't think of an exact plan.. Creating Them -. then . fun... Advanced Conversational Management To direct the conversation into even BETTER areas.. fun. or show what they have. General Conversational Management To steer the conversation in a good direction."Where can I go that is fun. steer the conversation towards directions that engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way o o Page 127 . she may have to do Y to prove that. • Introduce topics that are fun. interesting things • Keep thinking .. think of general navigation • She Must Be Engaged In The Conversation! You need her to talk. •• Show interest when someone discusses positive.-and do Y to get it? • Can she do Y and make it happen? • Can she see that Y will get her what she wants? • Can she trust herself enough to do Y? o • Ambiguities — CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT o General . • Confidence • Maturity • Security • Self-Directed • Intelligence • Control " • Excitement Challenges Challenge them to get what they want. and interesting?" " Move the conversation in that direction. by doing Y? • Does she want you to THINK she has X. interesting things. • Repeat. positive and interesting. interesting things. • Topic Turning Point The process of moving from one topic to one of 6-8 relevant topics • In general.. Are they ready to take advantage of that (this) opportunity? • Does she really want X and see how Y can get that? • Does she really have X. • Can she see an opportunity to have "X".Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • Opportunities. and see how doing Y would demonstrate it?> • Does she have what it takes to get X. bring up positive. • Don't engage in conversations when it's NOT about positive. fun. listen and be IN the conversation! • Conversational Dynamics Topics flow from one to the next..
use the language tools as much as possible! • What If The Outcome Is Not What You Expected? • Move on! o o • TOPICS o Topics Of Enthusiasm and Passion Few things are more compelling in a person than for them to be passionate about something (hopefully many things) in life."Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic. and seductive things. use as many of the language tools as you can. use the language tools. seductive things?" " Move the conversation in that direction. Conversational Fractionation • Using Conversational Fractionation • Start • Move • Back Up • Repeat • Dead Ends Come Back To Life! • Just back up and start over! Conversational Overview and Review • General Flow • Start on just about ANY subject. seductive tilings? • The entire time: o If you hit a "dead end". bring up images and thoughts that may work for you. o If you get to a good subject or topic. • Keep thinking . More Advanced Conversational Management To further direct the conversation into even BETTER areas. • When on good topics. • Connections • Going for it • Making good decisions Page 128 o . stay there for a while. and interesting? • Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner? • Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic. fascinating. by there very nature. keep it there. Repeat. • Where can I go that is fun.Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner? Move the conversation in that direction. Get the conversation there. back up a few steps. and get the effect. steer the conversation towards romantic. fascinating.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • • o Keep thinking . fascinating. • Repeat. positive. and while there. Seduction Oriented Topics SOTs are topics that.
Pattern Riffing In Real-Time • Use the Conversational Management techniques to get to good subjects • Look at the interesting topic that she and you are discussing o what is happening o what you know o what she is reacting to o and discuss things which are appropriate. The Complete Conversational Model See Appendix 2 o o • PATTERNS o Pattern • • • • Formula While talking to a woman. Present a Call to action.Look out for SOTXs • Direct 0 Move towards SOTs. asking. Those are STOXs.Use the conversational Management Techniques. Page 129 o . Conversational Model With SOTXs.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • • • • • • • o Surrendering to feelings Getting excited Feeling excited Trusting your judgment Taking chances Indulgence Maturity Good decisions Expanded Seduction Oriented Topics . • Manage . Amplify these feelings and states by talking.. Link and associate these feelings to you. • Get her to.SOTXs For each SOT. and • Look for: o Positive emotions and feeling o Positive sensations (as in physical ones) o Exciting feelings. o Canned Patterns .Great as EXAMPLES • Learn and know some of them they may be useful. get her to "experience" good feelings and states. there are easily 6-8 variations on that SOT that you can talk about. clarifying. o Talk about these things or listen to you talk about these things o get her to think about these things o get her to feel these things o get her to link them to you. • Direct .. o Wanting to take action or seize an opportunity • Use the language tools.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • Use some "act now" languaging. and sensual things. o The Best Pattern Is This: • Get her to talk and think about positive. • Use the language tools so that YOU become associated with those things Page 130 . exciting. interesting.
Point Or Touch On Positive And Negative LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES o Pace And Lead • Topics and Subjects • Mindset of Frame • Current Reality o Give Them A Reason o Listing " General .. Those) MORE TOOLS o Pointing And Gestures o Linking Gestures (Towards And Away) o Easy Linking Expanded (Pointing With This.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course APPENDIX II Speaking and Language Tools "Cheat Sheet" • SPEAKING POINTERS o Voice Tone And Tonality o Pacing And Pausing o Energy And Enthusiasm LANGUAGE TOOLS AND DETAILS o Adjectives And Adverbs o Trance Words o Weasel Phrases o Embedded Commands o Linking o Easy-Linking (This..) o Easy Anchoring . That. These.At the End • Burying Items o More And More o Compare And Contrast o Parts " Parts of a Subject • Parts of a Person o Opportunities And Challenges • Mini Challenges " Opportunities And Challenges o Ambiguities • • • Page 131 . That.
Fun. Emotions and Imagination in a Positive Way More Advanced Mgt. Positive.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course APPENDIX III The Complete Conversational Management Model The Complete Conversational Management Model General Mgt. Seductive SOTXs SOTs The Complete Conversational Management Model Page 133 . Fascinating. and Interesting Advanced Mgt. Romantic.
. positive. Steer towards .Romantic. interesting .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course The Complete Conversational Management Model (continued) Start a Conversation Manage the Conversation Move the Conversation in a Good Direction Steer towards .Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way . Steer towards . fascinating.. back up! If you move back to a general topic.Fun... start over! Page 134 . Especially when at or near SOTXs and SOTs.. Fractionate If you take a wrong turn. seductive things Direct the Conversation Pay attention when Good Subjects come up (SOTXs) Listen for anything a step or two away from an SOT Move towards SOTs Stay there as long as you can Use The Language Tools! As much as possible..
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