Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
A structured training program that teaches the language and conversational skills of Speed Seduction .
Speed Seduction is a registered trademark of Ross Jeffries, used with permission.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Table of Contents
Page No. Title Page Legal Notices Table of Contents Product Content Product Protection and User Consent Formatting and Conventions Acknowledgements Forward Registration Important Note About Exercises and Assignments 1.0 INTRODUCTION AND GETTING STARTED i ii iii vi vi vii ix x xii xii 1 D1-T1 Disk and Track No.*
1.2 1.3 1.4 1.5 1.6 2.0 2.1 2.1.1 2.1.2 2.1.3 2.1.4 2.2 2.2.1 2.2.2 2.2.3 2.2.4 2.2.5 2.2.6 2.3 2.3.1 2.3.2 2.3.3 2.3.4 2.4 3.0 3.1 3.1.1
Why Is This Course Needed? What We Will Handle, and How Investing In Yourself, Or Not Can We Change The Way You Speak? Manipulation and Ethics Concerns SPEAKING AND LANGUAGE
1 2 3 4 5 7
D1-T10 D1-T15 D1-T24 D1-T26 D1-T32 D2-T1 D2-T1 D2-T1 D2-T2 D2-T15 D2-T26 D2-T39 D2-T40 D3-T1 D3-T14 D3-T25 D3-T42 D4-T1 D4-T12 D4-T14 D4-T22 D4-T30 D4-T35 D4-T46 D5-T1 D5-T2 D5-T9
Speaking Pointers 7 The "Cool" Factor 7 Voice Tone and Tonality 7 Pacing and Pausing 9 Energy and Enthusiasm 10 Language Tools and Details 12 Adjectives and Adverbs 12 Trance Words 13 Weasel Phrases 15 Embedded Commands 17 Linking 19 Easy-Linking (This, That, These, Those) 21 More Tools 23 Pointing and Gestures 24 Linking Gestures (Towards and Away) 25 Easy Linking Expanded (Pointing With This, That, These, Those ...) 26 Easy Anchoring - Point Or Touch, On Positive 27 Review 29 LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES Pace and Lead General Pace and Lead Techniques 31 31 32
* Disk and Track Numbers References to the CDs and the tracks on them are shown in a format such as "D2-T4", which in this example refers to Disk 2, Track 4.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Table of Contents (continued)
Page No. 3.1.2 3.1.3 3.1.4 3.2 3.3 3.3.1 3.3.2 3.3.3 3.3.4 3.3.5 3.4 3.5 3.6 3.6.1 3.6.2 3.7 3.7.1 3.7.2 3.7.3 3.7.4 3.8 3.9 4.0 4.1 4.1.1 4.1.2 4.1.3 4.1.4 4.2 4.2.1 4.2.2 4.2.3 4.3 4.3.1 4.3.2 4.3.3 4.3.4 4.3.5 4.4 4.4.1 4.4.2 4.4.3 4.4.4 4.4.5 4.5 4.5.1 4.5.2 Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects Pace and Lead-Mindset Or Frame Of Mind Pace and Lead - Current Reality Give Them a Reason Listing General Listing Listing - At The End Listing - Burying Items Listing, Pauses, and Emphasis.. Listing Review More and More Compare and Contrast Parts Parts of a Subject Parts of a Person Opportunities and Challenges Using Their Own Processes What Do People Want? Mini-Challenges Opportunities and Challenges Ambiguities Summary CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT Challenges Detailed and Specific Plans Are Just Not Workable Navigation Example Navigational Strategies Are Needed She Must Be Engaged In The Conversation! How Conversations Happen Conversational Dynamics Conversational Model Topic Turning Point General Conversational Management Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Want How To Steer Conversations, Moment To Moment The Model With Strategy and Tactics In Place Exercises and Assignments Summary Advanced Conversational Management Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Really Want Steering Conversations Moment To Moment The Model With Advanced Strategy and Tactics In Place Exercises and Assignments Summary More Advanced Conversational Management More About Getting The Conversation To Go Steering Conversations Using More Advanced 33 35 38 39 41 41 43 45 48 48 48 51 54 54 58 61 62 62 63 64 69 69 71 71 71 71 72 72 72 72 73 77 79 79 81 82 83 86 86 86 88 88 91 93 93 93 94 Disk a n d Track N o . * D5-T12 D5-T20 D5-T29 D5-T32 D6-T1 D6-T4 D6-T15 D6-T24 D6-T36 D6-T37 D6-T38 D6-T54 D7-T1 D7-T4 D7-T15 D7-T34 D7-T36 D7-T38 D7-T40 D7-T43 D7-T64 D7-T66 D8-T1 D8-T1 D8-T3 D8-T4 D8-T5 D8-T10 D8-T12 D8-T13 D8-T14 D8-T15 D8-T16 D8-T16 D8-T19 D8-T23 D8-T25 D8-T32 D8-T33 D8-T33 D8-T35 D8-T38 D8-T39 D8-T46 D8-T47 D8-T47 D8-T49
1 4. and Follow The Course Be Willing and Prepared To Put Energy Into Congratulations! Well Done! EXAMPLES. 94 96 96 97 97 98 99 99 99 99 101 101 102 104 109 111 115 115 115 116 116 119 119 119 119 119 119 121 Disk a n d Track N o .4 7.5 8.5.3 4.1 7.0 6..7.7 4.2 6. * D8-T52 D9-T1 D9-T2 D9-T3 D9-T5 D9-T6 D9-T7 D9-T8 D9-T9 D9-T10 D9-T11 D9-T14 D9-T15 D9-T24 D9-T32 D9-T33 D10-T1 D10-T1 D10-T7 D10-T12 D10-T13 D10-T18 D10-T18 D10-T26 D10-T27 D10-T28 D10-T29 D11
. Conversational Fractionation The 1-Shot Beeline Fallacy How Fractionation Works Using Conversational Fractionation Dead Ends Come Back To Life! Conversational Overview and Review Conversational Management Approach What If The Outcome Is Not What You Expected? Summary TOPICS Topics Of Enthusiasm and Passion Seduction Oriented Topics Expanded Seduction Oriented Topics ..7.6 220.127.116.11 4. .3 4. Do The Exercises.0 7.3 7.0 The Model With More Advanced Strategy and Tactics In Place.4 4.6. 4. .5 6.
APPENDICES I II III Course "Cheat Sheet" Speaking and Language Tools "Cheat Sheet" The Complete Conversational Management Model 123 131 133
.2 7..3 5. .SOTXs Conversational Model With SOTXs The Complete Conversational Model PATTERNS Pattern O v e r Pattern Formula Canned Patterns Pattern Riffing In Real-Time REVIEW AND SUMMARY Review Summary Listen.4 7.1 6.7. EXAMPLES.3 6.6.2 4.0 5.3 5.2 4.4 5.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Table of Contents (continued)
Page No. . .1 5..2 5. EXAMPLES v i e w .
It is also used for subject headings so that these stand out and apart from the normal text. Not every track number is listed. Listen to the audio where an example is presented.Italicized Text is used for emphasis in many cases where boldface text may by nearby. The audio is NOT an exact duplicate of the text shown in the workbook. Italicized Text . these are in most cases presented as a way to augment the content of the audio presentation. graphic titles. Since the work book is an "outline" and not a transcript. and their use is key to many students' understanding of the concepts presented.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Formatting and Conventions
The following formatting.e.At times. CD Location References are shown using terms such as "D3-T5" in the text. The relationship between these two can be best described by considering the workbook text to be (for the most part) an "outline" of what is presented in the audio. and Assignments are all shown using this typeface (Arial. or major points in the workbook. or clarity. This shows information that could be considered part of an overall "outline" of what the audio presentation contains. and conventions have been developed and are used throughout this transcript/workbook. a "serif typeface). The graphics in the latter sections are significant in that they are an essential part of the understanding and leaning. there is not an exact place in the book that correlates to the start of each and every track on the audio CDs. D3-T5 CD Track References .As shown to the right Towards the right margin of section titles and headings..that is simply to show a list of related items. . Boldface Text . However these conventions are guidelines. Exercises. a "sans-serif typeface).
Samples of the formatting and conventions used:
Typefaces . The written text is NOT a transcript.Boldface Text is used to emphasize certain text or passages. There are certain conventions used in the formatting of the workbook.
. Although there are paragraphs of explanatory text. This shows (for example) the Disk (3) and the Track number (5) that corresponds to that part of the workbook contents.A majority of the workbook content is shown in this typeface (Times New Roman. there may be instances when the conventions are not used for the sake of emphasis. and to make it easier to reference those items at a later time. Lists . and the italics are simply used as a way to show a different manner of emphasis. items are presented in a list-like fashion such as this: • Item 1 • Item 2 • Item 3 • Etc. Therefore most of the track references are shown at the start of major sections. If the graphic cannot fit there (due to page breaks) then the graphic is placed on the next available page. A majority of the workbook is presented in an "outline" form.
Text within graphics.. and the Formulas. styles. i. Graphics are used in the workbook as well. Usually the graphic is shown on the page immediately following where that graphic is first mentioned in the text. graphic captions. Italics are also used to point the reader towards specific content of the audio CDs.
it is required in order for the "flow" of the book content to remain consistent. This also may result in some page breaks being in places which are not optimal. but that is a necessity due to the complexity of the book. an Exercise may require interaction with other people. and Assignments are shown inside boxes such as this. -3) to account for multiple graphics in one section of text. or technique.
Candidate Topics Figure XYZ-1: Graphic Title Sub-paragraph . A Formula is a way to present a concise explanation of some item. or maybe and Assignment can be done alone by the student. This may require that a graphic be placed on the next page after where it is first mentioned (instead of being directly below where the graphic is first mentioned in the text).
Formula.1 .The workbook is laid out to minimize the amount of blank space where reasonably possible. and the "A" indicates the number of the graphic within a section itself (i. This is shown below. fact. The number is in the format of "XYZ-A" where "XYZ" denotes the number of the section where the graphic is placed. Most exercises can be done alone. Assignments also call for action on the part of the reader. Although this is not optimal.
. Exercises. then that text is shown immediately below the graphic using an indented paragraph such as this.Text boxes are used for very specific purposes in the workbook.e. Each Formula is presented in its own "text box" as shown here.If a graphic has text that helps to further explain that graphic. Text Boxes . Similarly. Exercises are a series of instructions that call upon the reader to do or perform certain actions.
Page Breaks . For example.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Each graphic has a number and a title of some type. there are instances where the definitions may be clouded to some degree. . there are cases where text boxes may actually "break" across two pages. Although the difference between Exercises and Assignments is maintained through most of the workbook. Assignments usually requier the reader to go out and interact with other person(s) in order to perform them correctly. -2.
Yates Canipe. and those who have entrusted me to teach you and to guide you. and have opened the door for me to find many ways of self-improvement and understanding.. MC. Dave Riker
. Special thanks to my friends. and who has also contributed greatly to helping men change their minds about themselves. mentors. To those in the original SD Lair group. I may miss a few sales because of such a delay. who helped me by allowing me to help them. colleagues. the creator of Speed Seduction . teachers. DM.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
The first and foremost acknowledgement goes out to Ross Jeffries himself. SM. and what is possible in their lives. . and this wait may have annoyed a few people. To all of you. and students (we are each all of these and more) in the TAGR Group. The main reason is that I do not wish to release any product until I believe that I am able to provide the level of quality. who was the business genius that brought Speed Seduction® to the masses through seminars and products. Thank you. associates. To the many experts out there who have augmented the SS teachings by showing me other aspects of the mind. JL. / must apologize to some degree for the time it has taken to finish this product. and MD. Ross's developments have lead not only to helping many men with this part of their lives. SP. those who have read what I have written.insight and teaching that I think is possible. opening the door for many into the world of self improvement. and to all of the Students out there who I have met at Speed Seduction® seminars. confidants. most notably Hypnotica. but have also shown many the way to a new way of living.. Working with these clients was especially instrumental in formulating and perfecting the concepts and teaching methods used in this product. To Dr. and to help you in finding the Women or Woman of Your Dreams. who have placed their trust in me and allowed me the experience of showing them new and wonderful possibilities for what their lives may have to offer. and for the assistance they provided with this product. but I sincerely hope that the results will prove to have made the wait worthwhile. To my coaching clients. EVS.
is up to him. as well. I think that many men. helps to provide these women with an even better choice. there are a lot of great men out there who would like to meet interesting women. I know of many women who are always distraught that they seem to not be able to meet good men. or the kind of man. learn. A woman should never "settle". and decide to move forward. And it's a shame for these women to be wanting for their company. Such men. are the ones that really DO look at this area of their lives. having and sharing experiences with. They don't know how to keep a woman's interest. the idea of simply communicating with and sharing experiences with the other half of the human population. Having many interesting men available. Whether a man decides to use this information as way to embark upon a period of his life which involves casual romantic interludes. or "compromise". there are a lot of wonderful women out there who would love to meet interesting men. This is so sad. There are many such men out there. in fact. intelligent. take action. Good. It's for these men.
. spending time with them. or with that special woman of which they have always dreamed. and in many cases the efforts of men to solve this problem on their own have been met by smallminded criticism and slander. Whether that be as friends or acquaintances. So. and showing themselves in the best and most honest light. Many men through no fault of their own have grown up to be adults and have had little instruction or assistance in a very important area of their lives. I think that is not correct. charming men. so that they really may share wonderful experiences of ALL types with women. the best men. information. and grow. and options. other people. interesting. that they will want to spend time with as well. They just have not been taught such things. she should decide to be with whom she wants to be with by having opportunities. are NOT in short supply. to make an informed choice. and sharing experiences with them. and for those women. whether this time has any sort of romantic or seductive component or not. and introducing themselves. (and more importantly a LACK of information in some cases) that can prevent such connections and moments from happening. One of the biggest tragedies of life is that there are things. They are the ones that really don't know how to introduce themselves. that I create products such as this. And I am here to help correct it. As if the interesting. He will be able to decide for himself which he feels is the best option for him. women. good-natured and well-intentioned man. And. At least then he will be in a position of choice. teachings.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
One of the most wonderful things about life is the idea of connecting with others. The women of the world will be better off in their own way. most women will be far better off and have much better chances with the kind of men. and set forth upon a path to improve this area of his life. or whether a man uses this information as a means to improve his chances of finding one special woman. who was simply deprived of an means to "learn about" how to meet and talk with women. for some reason seem to be in short supply. Sadly this is most apparent when it comes to men. some of the most wonderful moments of life are brought about by people. From that position. or don't know how to present themselves in the best way. should somehow not improve himself.
read. and women. Apply.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course So. of your dreams.. So guys . And good luck in finding The Women. Learn. Study. Dave Riker
. and applied by men. Get out there. So in my own way. or Woman.. understood. the benefits are meant to be for both men and women alike. even though this product is intended to be read. somewhat happier and able to enjoy their lives even more than before. Have fun. my goal and my hope is that this product will make men.
Conversational Skills The ability to manage conversations is needed as well. some people do this naturally. pay attention. The purpose of this workbook is to: • • • Provide an outline of the material covered in the audio program. and get the full benefit of everything this course has to offer. and what works in the field. and "reprogrammed" in a way. You will have this way of speaking as a PART of who you are and what you can do! Guys need to be trained. to use these language skills naturally as just a part of the way they speak. you can change the way you speak as well. you will do so in the future and use these techniques as well. and on you as well. Instructions for each are provided.0
1. Some guys don't need this. Welcome to Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course. seeing what is needed.
This program is based upon experience with countless students. So even this "intro" section is starting to work for you. 1.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
1. We will be teaching you the detailed language skills that will really help you. Provide additional explanation of some points that are covered in the audio program. there is a need. If you are her "type" you don't need this.
. These techniques all need to sound and be "natural" to actually be effective. You are already on your way! This course works on many levels. but this will help you if you are not. consciously and subconsciously. Language Skills What works? What makes the successful guys able to use these technologies? Partly it's the ability to actually "talk" in this manner. This workbook is meant to studied along with a series of audio lectures that are recorded on CDs. then on some level.1
INTRODUCTION AND GETTING STARTED
Welcome and Thanks. You are not going to sound like this or talk like this all of the time! Just in the way that you shift and change how you speak now in different situations. Present a series of exercises and assignments.2 WHY IS THIS COURSE NEEDED? D1-T10
If you are here. We will teach you ways to easily manage conversations so that they go in interesting directions. Listen to it. along with spaces for written responses where necessary. If you follow along and do the exercises.
talking. not a "trick".3 Major • • • • • • • • WHAT WE WILL HANDLE. so we need to approach this in many ways. AND HOW Topics Speaking Pointers Language Tools and Details Conversational Management Conversational Fractionation Topics . responding. but if you are "thinking" too much." Guys need to stop the worrying about "Doing something wrong" It's only "wrong" if you are TRYING to do or be something you are not. Sure. In a way. Real Time "Occurring immediately . but it's really YOU talking! Guys are too focused on "how can I use this" when in a conversation. You need to integrate skills to the degree that they ARE a part of who you ARE. for a while at least. This is a term that will be used throughout this course. and how people speak.. must react to a steady flow of new information without interruption..
. Other parts of the language tools you may have to "think" about.. many times! • In fact we have already started! Where Does This Material Come From • From SS Teachings. Guys need to be able to just "do this" and "talk this way" in REAL-TIME.Seduction Oriented Topics Patterns and Riffing Examples Dl-Tl5
What Methods Are Used • Describe and explain the details of the techniques • Explicit examples of how the details work • Examples throughout and within the discussions • Examples section at the end. Not inside your head "thinking" about "how can I use this?"! 1.Enthusiasm and Passion Topics . • Working on several "levels" of you mind at once • Models to arrive at an overall understanding • Left brain and right brain are both addressed • Conscious and subconscious minds are both given what they need for real understanding and retention.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
You have to be PROGRAMMED to do this so you can have a conversation. • Things may seem to "repeat". so let's define and explain it for you. respond to input immediately . and be a part of it. some of the ways that you speak now will be reprogrammed so that speaking in a new way will be natural. but that's your left brain talking! We are reprogramming many years of your experience.. how it is learned. then you are not actually IN the conversation! You need to be engaged in a conversation. listen. listening. • Exercises to develop understanding and skills • Assignments for you to do in the field. some things will sound quite familiar... that is important. • Other teachings about language. interacting.
effort. but in terms of THEM really being willing and ready to change. you are doing just that. The best way to listen to this course is while also reviewing the workbook (especially in the conversational management sections). In addition. However. • Listen to other products in conjunction with this product. to give you a real roadmap to actually learn the material.4 INVESTING IN YOURSELF. many of these people will be those negative types of people that will then dispute the benefits of this program! Why? Because THEY have not invested anything into it! Not just in terms of dollars. Many of the assignments will deal with talking to people. The Mind-Momentum Principle At Work • Get energy. listening multiple times in any setting also has a lot of benefit. If you need to make your own copies for use in multiple locations. and who may "try" to listen to the course. • Is there an "optimal way" to use the product. as assigned or as required. • Get some other written material to work with for this course. and being open to what benefits this program can bring. making it a part of YOU. If they just "try" it. So. or revised? Yes. • Be prepared to have a place to practice for this course! You will need to be able to speak out loud to do many of the exercises. new. • Having a good social life will help you. • Get that "Mind-Momentum" going to help you change and improve. do it! But please. they aren't really putting themselves INTO it. Other SS products will work well.
. 1. Applying a structured methodology of step-by-step methods. Is this information.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
• • • •
From personal experiences and how I used the materials. and engagement. there IS some overlap and duplication with other products and systems. do whatever you need to do to listen to this course a LOT. and a few women's magazines as well. From working with clients and seeing what worked and how they were able to change. Be wary of those people who may want to "borrow" a copy.
The Ways To Study And Use The Product • Listen to the CDs. • This may seem complicated but the point is to get you SO familiar with the tools that you become the guy who does this! Some Very Important Points • Find all of your current SS products and inventory them. the emphasis here is training you to do it for yourself. OR NOT D1-T24
Any real change requires you to make an investment in yourself using energy. We are reprogramming years and years of you "speaking" in a certain manner. and engagement into your effort to really learn and use these materials. keep those copies to yourself. Changing that will take some time. and this journey. or not? There are various ways. the more you put into it. a concept that was brought up earlier. By embarking upon this course. the more you will get out of it. do the assignments over and over! • Be patient. However. You will need them because you will have assignments that deal with these. both audio and written materials. effort. • Follow along in the workbook if you can • Do the exercises and assignments! • Listen over and over. see what works for you. Also maybe get a romance novel or two. However. and this is much easier if you have an active life where you can have many conversations. do the exercises over and over. that YOU just DO.
then its easier. But it's tough to do that. Those who are not. kids are taught about language. its YOU being YOU! You cannot fail at being YOU!
The approach in this course is different. just being YOU. at every moment!
Some people want to try to memorize. Immersion is the key.by hearing others around you speak! You were IMMERSED in language. sentences. you heard it a lot. Not as congruent. Imagine having to "think about" how to talk. And actual assignments. You will end up "memorizing" thing to some degree. about grammar. Don't let their lack of willingness to improve themselves. Most people want to approach this by learning bits and pieces • • That's good in a way. will not benefit. hold you back. but to then USE it in conversation is difficult. It's less effective." So. because it addresses that analytical part of your mind. but only indirectly. because you will hear it so much! But a LOT of what is being conveyed here is learning by EXAMPLE. its a memorized "thing". you heard it. paragraphs. It makes guys nervous. where you use the skills in the real world. there is a "right" and "wrong" way to do it! But if you are just TALKING. Then it's about a "performance. etc. Can we literally change the way you speak? • • • • • • • How you select words Create phrases Form sentences Pick topics Speak passionately. and you started to form the ability to speak and communicate based upon that!
.But This Is A Different Type Of Learning. at will Engage in conversation Manage conversations
Yes. It Is Possible! . But that's not how you learned to talk! You learned to talk when you were a child . You keep trying to "remember" things. there is no "right" way or "wrong" way. 1.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
People must be engaged in the process to get its benefits. some structures. where you learn skills piece by piece. • • • • • • You will get some details.5 CAN WE CHANGE THE WAY YOU SPEAK? D1-T26
Is this really possible? This sounds difficult. trying to "remember" what to say. Also progressive exercises. • • • • • • • • This might be good as a learning TOOL. consequently. Plus it's not YOU talking. you heard it in context.
How People Initially Learn How To Speak • • • • Sure in middle school. some models.
With THIS approach HERE.6
Many guys have been uncomfortable with using many of these skills. so that you will have more ability and more flexibility to do what is appropriate MANIPULATION AND ETHICS CONCERNS D1-T32
1. more a part of YOU. • Break it down into small parts. based upon feelings that when using them. Various Training Methods • • We use a lot of repetitive training methods so that these techniques have a better chance of becoming "automatic". trade. deep ethics issues and blocks many guy's success.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
This Course Uses Many Techniques To Train You To Have Workable. and be more of WHO YOU ARE. This causes some real. which we go over and over. "it's not me" or "I am just using a trick or technique". We will have you become familiar with the range of ways of speaking and sounding.
Exercises and Assignments to Teach You the Skills • Skills Training like any sport. like when I say "here is an example" Implicit examples. or craft. how you communicate.
. we will change the way you talk so that it will be easier. where I am just DOING these things all during the program. more natural. it's not about throwing something AT her. Examples • • Explicit examples. and who and what YOU are! Using these skills will be less of an "act". Real-World Skills.
but if you really want to work on this even more. a sense of being relaxed and calm • It also allows you to express some energy and excitement at different times. etc.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
2. BORING. Examples: One way to think of this is to consider "where" your voice is generated from in your body. not out of nervousness. to be cool.1. and says a lot about you. calm. That "cool" feeling comes from being calm and speaking in a relaxed fashion. Read several paragraphs. "Cool" comes from being calm and sure of yourself. but because it's appropriate to the situation. focusing on the back of your throat might make this easier to do). and what people like in general. something you are interested in. that there is a "fire" beneath the surface. 2) Read some more of that material out loud. reserved. 1) Take some of that reading material. We will work on this here in this course. and even goes a bit over-the-top to really help you to understand what is being discussed.0
2. If this is a challenge for you. This is good as long as it's not BORING. focusing on generating your voice from your nose. do this for several minutes. The audio section demonstrates these options quite well.1. even some of the materials from other products. 2. how interesting you are. and this time focus on speaking by generating the sound from within your mouth (or. there ARE products that focus JUST on this area and you may want to invest in those. Your tone of voice really conveys a lot about who you are. there are great products and examples of this elsewhere. and read it aloud. That's what women like. Why is this important? • Great voice tone conveys comfort.2 Voice Tone and Tonality D2-T2
Listen to some examples of different tones of voice. how they make you feel.1
SPEAKING AND LANGUAGE
SPEAKING POINTERS The "Cool" Factor D2-T1 D2-T1
Guys want to sound "cool". Listen as the examples demonstrate: • Speaking through the nose • Speaking through the mouth • Speaking from the chest
Exercises for Speaking Pointers Grab some reading material of some type. That's the "allure". how they sound. how calm you are.
. but giving the impression that there IS more. Cool does NOT mean to be boring and to put people to sleep while talking! The coolest people are the ones that are FUN to talk to and fun to be with! You don't have to be cold.1 2. Too many guys "try" to be cool but actually come off as COLD or even worse.
and really focus on having that voice generated from your chest. really make a note to speak lower. SOUND relaxed.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
3) Now read some of the material. 1) Over the next few days when speaking to anyone. Also. and make them a part of who you are. Focus on dropping your voice down from your nose/mouth. and where you are speaking from (your nose. it's important that you do what you can to REALLY make a point of doing these assignments. Relax. Make notes below as to when it happened. where you were. and recall some time in the recent past when you were kind of nervous or fearful.in the real world! To get the most benefit from this course. Real-world experience will really help you to not just "know" the skills. Can you recall how you spoke? Did the way you sound in that situation sound like any of the examples you just did? See the similarity?
Assignments for Speaking Pointers These are your first real assignments in the course. but this time really focus upon generating the sound from deep within your chest. but to actually HAVE the skills. or chest). make note of how you felt (nervous. comfortable. Day/Time Who you spoke to Speaking from? How you felt. and whether or not you DID it! Day/Time Who you spoke to Situation (Where) Did you DO it?
. relaxed-confident). See how relaxed it actually makes you feel and how you really need to BE relaxed to do this! 4) Take a moment. mouth.
2) In the next few conversations you have with people. make a note to yourself as to how you are speaking. with whom. Make notes below for some of the conversations and see if you can see a correlation between these items. Assignments are where you are given a real task to go out and do .
powerful. Too fast? Too slow? Hurried-nervous? Hurried-excited? Slow-confused?
. and charismatic presence. Speaking too quickly can show tension. Focus on reading in a very hurried fashion as if you are very nervous. Why is • • • this important? Correct pacing and speed of delivery conveys comfort.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Strategic Formula for Speaking Pointers Use your best tone of voice (speaking from your chest) to convey a relaxed. or almost a sense of panic. Being able to vary your pacing and pausing can help a lot to convey a sense of intrigue and create interest.1. as we discussed in the past section. Something you are interested in. or don't quite understand the content. 1) Take some of that reading material and read it aloud. 4) Now read some of the material. in a manner that makes you sound as if you are very confused. Read several paragraphs and do this for several minutes. and then far far too slow. but this time read it in a slow. relaxed.)
Assignments for Pacing and Pausing 1) Over the next few days when speaking to anyone. and this time focus on reading in a quick and hurried fashion. but go ahead and convey excitement in your voice! 3) Now read some of the material. deliberate. even some of the materials from other products. comfortable manner. (Maybe even be aware of where your voice is coming from. first very very fast. make a note to yourself as to how you are speaking in terms of your pacing and pausing. but this time read it slowly.3
Pacing and Pausing
Listen to the examples where some various pacing is demonstrated. and shows that the speaker is relaxed. 2) Read some more of that material out loud.
There are many variations: Listen as these are demonstrated • Hurried showing nervousness • Hurried showing excitement • Slow as in hesitant and/or confused • Slow in a way that is deliberate and relaxed
Exercises for Pacing and Pausing Grab some reading material of some type.
Who cares? Why does this matter? • Most guys are just TOO BORING. where. YOU act boring. then you can show more enthusiasm.4
Energy and Enthusiasm
Listen to some examples of how this can sound . It's good to have the ability and range to display passion... to convey a more relaxed and deliberate manner. and if you DID it! Day/Time Who you spoke to Situation (Where) Did you DO it?
Strategic Formula for Pacing and Pausing Use variations in pace.
. just make a note of this after-the-fact and write that down below. dead-end conversations. and well-placed pauses. By doing this. Day/Time Who you spoke to What type of pacing and pausing?
2) For the next few days. When someone else is being boring. Make note of when. enthusiasm.. you get stuck in fewer boring. to convey a sense of drama and intrigue in what you are saying in a way that "captivates" people and makes them want to listen to you. If they do or say something that is interesting to YOU.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course Slow-relaxed? You don't have to change it yet. start to focus on changing your pacing and pausing. • This also allows YOU to convey how interesting someone ELSE is as well.1. YOU can show an appropriate amount of energy and enthusiasm. energy. and excitement when appropriate. or bored. • If someone else is being interesting.
When you respond or talk back.. 3) Get some written material that you have NO interest in. animated. go ahead. Watch on either TV. their pace. and read that aloud in a boring.. bland. 2) Watch and listen to some speakers who use a lot of energy and enthusiasm when they are talking! Really pay attention to how they speak. Do this for a good 10-15 minutes. whatever it is.
Assignments for Energy and Enthusiasm 1) Over the next few days. their tone. and BE BORING. even some of the materials from . 6) Take that earlier written material about the subject that you are NOT interested in and that really bores you. 1) Watch and listen to some speakers talk about a boring. their tone.
. monotone voice. technical presentations. and how your respond.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
The audio section demonstrates more details about sounding boring/bored and also sounding as if you have energy and enthusiasm. and that are excited about. energetic voice. Again. your work. go ahead and SHOW your enthusiasm! Be energetic in how you speak. bland voice with no energy or enthusiasm. 4) Get some written material that really DOES interest you. other products. Read it OUT LOUD in an exciting. Note how even if the material is something you do NOT care about. and how much (or little) energy is conveyed. which bores you. that a good speaker can really grab your attention with their energy and enthusiasm. do that for 10-15 minutes.. BE BORING and show no enthusiasm at all.
Exercises for Energy and Enthusiasm Grab some reading material of some type. make sure it is something that YOU are passionate about. something you are interested in. women. your car. and read THAT aloud in a way that DOES show energy and enthusiasm! Make that sound as convincing as #4 above. Really pay attention to how they speak.. how you listen. 5) Take that written material that really does interest you. 2) For the next few conversations you have with people where you ARE interested in the subject. Read it OUT LOUD in a boring. and how much (or little) energy is conveyed. dry topic. etc. Think as if YOU are convincing a group of people how great this is! Maybe your Dream Job of a lifetime is dependant upon YOU speaking well and showing how passionate YOU are about this! Do that for a good 10-15 minutes. their pace. monotone. whenever someone is talking about something boring. Again. do that for 10-15 minutes. maybe sports.
Strategic Formula for Energy and Enthusiasm Using energy and enthusiasm when speaking so that people can become energized and enthusiastic about listening to and being with you. taped lectures.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
2.. 4) Think of three recent conversations you had when you talked to someone about something that you REALLY liked. Who you spoke to Subject
5) Now. It's good if YOU are also interested in it. you should be able to do this for at least 3-5 minutes each. Day. • Their use must be automatic.
. they are not things that can be measured or specified. while Adverbs will describe ACTIONS (verbs).1 Adjectives and Adverbs D2-T40
Listen to an example where many of these are used in descriptive language. 2. boring. and sensations. Remember. Note whom you were talking to. use more Adjectives and Adverbs.2
LANGUAGE TOOLS AND DETAILS
These are the Bit And Pieces • These are the sort of things that can be powerful. Most men could be helped by having more descriptive speech. and the subject you were talking about. Examples • Car reviews • Movie Reviews • This course!
Exercises for Adjectives and Adverbs 1) Find some written material that deals with something where people are speaking passionately about some subject. They sound cold. (Maybe highlight them in some manner. and uninteresting. not the logical side of a person.2. whatever. Do this for each of the conversations listed above. talk about each thing or subject again.) 3) Read that text OUT LOUD. Cars. Re-live it. and make note of the adjectives and adverbs in it. and stress the adjectives and adverbs in it. we are working to appeal to the emotions. Maybe say those adjectives or adverbs and put more energy into those words and emphasize them in some manner. If you really like this subject. because to have to "think about" using them is almost impossible! • You need to be TRAINED TO USE THEM automatically. out loud. feelings. and more ways of talking about processes.. 2) Read it. but this time. Most guys are too dry in their speech. or they are too factual and leftbrained. movies. talk about it in a descriptive way. Adjectives will describe THINGS (nouns). add more descriptive terms to it. sports. but must be done over and over. These words modify or in some way describe. nouns and verbs. Most Adjectives and Adverbs are qualitative.
Act like you are really having the conversation again. "paint a picture" with your words.
3) Practice out loud how you would have said those things in each of the three conversations.2. emotions. Trance • • • • • Word List Instantaneously Suddenly Find Yourself Convince Yourself Suppose
. their emotional side. Trance words help to "open the person up" so that their subconscious. b.
2. Start with just a few of them. make sure to use some of those adjectives and adverbs in your descriptions. is listening and more engaged in the conversation. Trance words are words that "call upon" the subconscious mind in order for them to be processed and understood. or objective manner.2
Listen to an example where many of these are used. so that their feelings. 4) The next several times any of those subjects come up in conversation. Write down what the subject was. factual. and processes awaken. Day Who you spoke to Subject
2) Write down a few adjectives and adverbs that you could have used in each discussion (refer to a. and c above). that you really enjoy.
Strategic Formula for Adjectives and Adverbs Use more adjectives and adverbs in your speech to appeal to and excite the emotional side of the listener. and with whom you spoke. that you are passionate about. They are not "analyzed" in a conscious. and then maybe add some more as time goes on.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Assignments for Adjectives and Adverbs 1) Make note of the next 3 times you are having a conversation which deals with something that YOU are really into. Be descriptive.
almost boring or mundane thing. Subject b. Looking at the list of Trance Words above. Doesn't that make it sound kind of "mysterious"? Maybe more exciting? Maybe you can take some normal. 7) Pick a subject that bores you. You can copy the ones you saw listed earlier. Maybe refer to some of your other SS products and see how many more you can find. Think for a moment about using those trance words to describe that subject. See how many you can find and notice how they are used in context. Maybe play one tape or CD. work. 4) Get your SS audio materials and listen for Trance Words (maybe even THIS course here). something that you think is dull. 6) Pick two subjects in which you are interested. that's the point!
Exercises for Trance Words 1) Make a full list of Trance Words. Look at the Trance Word List above. but also see if you can add some to the list. even something concrete like your job. Now speak OUT LOUD about that subject. see and hear if you can pick out when the speaker is using Trance Words. and make it more interesting? Well. political speakers. 5) Take the written text from an SS product (maybe from #3 above) and read it out loud. and see if you can pick these out. Write them down below. or religious speakers. sportscasters. like advertisements. placing an emphasis on the Trance Words when you see them.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • • Imagine Mysterious (-ly) Wonder (-ous) (-ously)
Think of any subject. See how many you can notice. Highlight or circle the Trance Words in a few sections. talk about it. Boring Subject
. Trance Word List
2) Watch or listen to some material where people are speaking passionately about something. talk OUT LOUD about that subject and see how many times you can use those Trance Words! Subject a. and see how many of those Trance Words you can use. or school. With that list of Trance Words (above) in hand. 3) Get out your written SS materials and look for Trance Words (maybe even use THIS course here).
These also work as transitional phrases. Practice working with those subjects out loud some more and see if you can get even more comfortable using Trance Words when talking about those subjects.. 2) Integrate a few more of these words into your every-day description of those subjects. What's it like when . Just do whatever you can to start using some of them at first. Use them when talking to different people..
Strategic Formula for Trance Words Using Trance Words will help to get the subconscious mind of the listener to be more of a part of your conversation.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Even though that may seem a bit strange.. to get from one subject to another.. Subject b.2.. If you were to . and more fascinating?
Assignments for Trance Words 1) Pick two subjects in which you are interested. that's what Weasel Phrases are for! Weasel Phrase List (see if you can add to the list by listening to the audio)... make a point to use at least one of the Trance Words in the conversation. • • • • • Have you ever .
. How do you talk about something without REALLY talking about it? How do you bring something up that may be a bit different. because it may be a bit too forward? Well. and using more and more as time goes on. doesn't that make it-sound more "exciting". Subject a. The next time you are speaking with anyone about those subjects (in the real world guys!).. maybe even a bit odd? Maybe even a different topic or change of subject? Or maybe something that you were worried about bringing up. As you .. more interesting.3
Listen to an example where many of these are used. If I were to .
see if you can use some or all of your favorite weasel phrases when talking about it. don't use that one!)
Now talk about one of these 4-5 aspects for 1-2 sentences.
Assignments for Weasel Phrases 1) Look at the list of Weasel Phrases that you wrote earlier. Maybe play one tape or CD. and see if you can string things together so that they sound better. 5) Did that sound weird? Strange? Ok . and do so with an awareness on some level that you are saying and using weasel phrases when they are in the text. the subject might be "going to a ball game" (pick your own. after another. The next several times that you talk about that subject with anyone. that seem as if they fit best into your way of speaking about subjects that you may like. Talk about THAT one for a few sentences. It will get easier. Subject
. 2) Get your SS audio materials and listen for some Weasel Phrases. This is necessary to have the kind of words and subjects that lend themselves to Weasel Phrases. See if you can pick these out. doing it. 3) Take the written SS materials you had earlier. but selecting different Phrases to link the aspects together. and read some of this material out loud. etc. (Weasel Phrases tend to provide ways to connect sentences and paragraphs that talk about how something is felt and experienced. and then use one of the Weasel Phrases and the bring up another "aspect". Use different Phrases. Pick 3 of them that seem the most natural to you. sensing it.
2) Note the subject that you used earlier for doing some exercises with Weasel Phrases (exercise 4 above).) Pick 4-5 different aspects of this "experience" that you will talk about. Maybe pausing for a moment before one.. For example. Try it again. 4) Pick a subject in which you are interested.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Exercises for Weasel Phrases 1) Get some of your written SS materials and look for some Weasel Phrases in the text. saying one slowly or quickly. While doing it. make note of the weasel phrases. In a moment. the experience of it. Take a moment and try to emphasize them in a way. etc. we want you to talk about how it FEELS. getting into it. Just read the SS material out loud. that it makes more sense. Do this until you use all 4-5 of the attributes that you listed.. then use another Weasel Phrase.
. These are small snippets of words and phrases which. Maybe play one tape or CD.4
Listen to an example where many of these are used. and where the person's emotions or feelings are somehow active (This "context" issue is discussed later in the product in great detail in Conversational Management sections. after another. Write down things that would make someone interested. lets say you were selling something to someone. allowing you to say more (and maybe more provocative things) about a subject. on some level. Think of general statements. "see how fascinated" . Just say this stuff out loud.It's not just about using one. once. or feel a certain way. 2) Get your SS audio materials and listen for these. that you are saying and using embedded commands at the time. • Repetition . "get into it". or "you want this" (car). instead "you like this" (car). etc. your car. 4) Pick a topic that YOU are very interested in.). Again not "you like that color". make note of the embedded commands. etc. its about multiple usage (bombardment)!
Exercises for Embedded Commands 1) Get our your written SS materials (written) and look for embedded commands in a few pages of the text. and read some of this material out loud.2. a place you have traveled. and do so with an awareness. Like "feel excited". feelings.. "this is what you have imagined having for yourself. Write down a list of embedded commands. that you want them to experience. 3) Take the written SS materials. and incorporate Weasel Phrases into the next several discussions you have about that subject as well. or experience while they are thinking about that subject.just general things that would cause a person to be interested in something. These are not to be sexual or suggestive.. and to "soften" the way in which something is said. your job. but just general things (feelings or states).
2. saying one slowly. Subject
Strategic Formula for Weasel Phrases Use Weasel Phrases to keep the conversation going. things you would like a listener to think about. Two key aspects of the use of Embedded Commands are often overlooked. "get excited". Take a moment and try to emphasize them in some way.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3) Select another subject that really interests you. maybe a car. To make it easy. maybe pausing for a moment before one. feel. Pick something that excites you! Maybe the subject is sports. intrigued. or more quickly. issue a "command" or statement that instructs someone do something. • Context . While doing it.It's very important that the command be brought up in the context of a conversation that is interesting. excited by something. Make a point to "lean on it" a bit. See if you can pick out embedded commands while listening. think of it like this. when separated from the context.
2) Select another subject that is a part of your life. start using a few of these commands when speaking. Maybe slowing down slightly. work on just saying them and finding a way to bring them up. but now focus more on "leaning" on the embedded commands a bit. that would assist you in being more influential. Write down a list of at least 5 commands that work well in that subject.
Strategic Formula for Embedded Commands Use embedded commands repeatedly and in the proper context. or maybe it has to deal with your job. pausing. to create a compelling will on the part of the listener follow you and listen to you. 4) The next several times that subject comes up in your life. changing your voice. but something where being influential may help. just enough to put the emphasis on the command. Subject Embedded Commands
3) Practice the use of those commands. 6) Do the same thing again. out loud. Maybe it's not a passion or real interest.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
5) Start talking about that topic out loud.
Assignments for Embedded Commands 1) Look at the list of Commands that you wrote and practiced that deal with a subject in which you are interested (exercise 4 above). See how natural you can make them sound. make some effort to use some of these commands in the context of a real discussion. The next several times that you talk about that subject with anyone. and with that list that YOU wrote in hand. and make it sound natural. see just how many of the embedded commands in that list that YOU can say! First. or school. in the context of talking about that subject. Start to place some emphasis on the command itself. Maybe you work in sales.
and experiences that are being discussed and associate or "link" them to you. In some ways. While doing so. which is an ambiguous way of referencing what she is thinking about. However. "in myself.)
. and read some of this material aloud. will "link" them to you. it's easier than you think! Just talking about a subject and getting her to be a part of the discussion.While listening to the audio. you speak of "this feeling". and make this "link" even more effective.5
Linking is a way to take the feelings. • • • • • • • Now with me In me In myself with this these this belief these feelings
Exercises for Linking 1) Get our your written SS materials (written) and look for examples of Linking in the text. Are you talking about the "feeling" she had at some time in the past? Are you talking about the feeling she is having right now? • Because you are using terms like "this". make note of where linking is taking place. non-specific. she has to feel it on some level (and she will. ALL of those possible definitions apply! Then. Linking Phrases . The most common linking phrase/tool that guys think about is the phrase "now with me". See if you can pick out Linking Phrases while listening. and getting her to experience. on some level. the linking tools and techniques will add to this. 3) Take the written SS materials. Take a moment and try to emphasize the linking in some way. using some of the techniques that have been discussed in this course (pausing. For example.2. "this interest". you are talking "about" a feeling or sensation. Just to "process" what is being discussed. if you are talking about a great feeling of excitement that a woman has had or is having. while looking at you. If she is experiencing these feelings in your presence. and talking to you. You can also make reference to "in me". etc. and feel emotions. recall. etc. • However. when you say "this feeling". • In order for her to understand the feeling being discussed. then on some level that is creating this "link". you are being ambiguous. as long as there is good rapport). also "this" and "these" as in "this feeling" of "these feelings". you become more associated with those feelings. change in voice tone. 2) Get your SS audio materials and listen for these.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
2. What is this based upon? • When talking. Maybe play one tape or CD. and inexact. then to the deeper levels of her mind. which is ambiguous (non-exact). she has to actually feel it to some extent. emotions. and then making an ambiguous reference to that feeling using your words. see if you can add more phrases to the list below.
it's much better if picked up along-the-way. (Again. Maybe slow down slightly. see just how many of the Embedded Commands and Linkage Phrases that you can use in your dialog. This will sound easier for you as we go on. A quick way of doing this is to simply add "this feeling". or change your voice.2. work on just saying them and finding a way to bring them up. pause. First. Doing linking in an exercise like this is difficult and hard to make it sound "natural". 6) Now do the same thing again. link them to you so that YOU become something and someone that they feel good about. "these feelings". but now focus more on "leaning" a bit on the Linkage Phrases. this will come to you much more easily.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course 4) Take the list of embedded commands that you created in an earlier exercise (Exercise #4 in section 2. As you hear more and more examples of this throughout the course.4). Embedded Command Linkage Phrase
5) Pick a topic that YOU are interested in as we did before (it can be the same one you used in Exercise #4 in section 2. and see if you can "add" text to each to link them to you in some way. etc. Plus the next section will make this much easier!
Strategic Formula for Linking After getting someone to experience good feelings and emotions. That's ok. and using the list above. You can even add the ever-popular "now.4).) For example. "this person or thing". with me" after one of more of the commands in your list.2. In some manner. you could say "feel excited by this" or "feel excited now" (you can also link things by putting in a reference to NOW).
. the linking is ambiguous and doesn't reference you directly. Another example would be to take the phrase "Get excited" and turn that into "get excited by THESE things".
Assignments for Linking No separate assignment for this. Write down the list of commands and an associated linkage phrase for each below. This may seem strange and sound a bit "off". just enough to put emphasis on the Linkage Phrase. Start talking about that topic out loud. where you listed "feel excited".
one "thing".Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
2. For example. for that multiple-instance bombardment that we spoke of before! The idea of linking wild. those sensations So. use the possessive form when saying or talking about ANYTHING POSITIVE and use the non-possessive form when saying anything negative!
.Non-Possessive (seems to reference something "else" or something "away") Consider these and those. Consider four words in the English language: • This • That • These • Those These are forms of pronouns. • This person.Possessive • Those . or not there at the time. and "that" is not. those people • These directions. • These people. Given that one type is possessive.Non-Possessive For example.Possessive (sort of "includes" something) • That . and one is not. So. there are times when they cannot be switched. "this person" tends to sound like the person that is there. seductive feelings to you may be great but. So. Whereas "that person" refers to someone "away" some "other" person who is not in the immediate area. In this case. that person • This direction. they reference a "thing". That. in general. These. those feelings • These sensations. that feeling • This sensation. who cares? Well these are almost interchangeable! You can switch this/that in sentences as you wish. exciting. and included. that direction • This feeling. that sensation They differ though in that "this" seems possessive. and it can be done a LOT. so you are not using a name or specific reference. a GREAT strategy is to link anything and everything positive to you (and link negative things away from yourself. these and those are plural • These . but that will be quite obvious when you try to do that). those directions • These feelings. (In some cases. Those)
Listen to an example where many of these are used. this & that are singular • This . but do so in a general manner.2. This is a new and very effective way to do linking that is easy to learn and master. these refer to plural items.6
Easy-Linking (This. This means they are ambiguous! Consider this and that. with you. with "these" being the possessive form. This and that tend to refer to singular items.
These. out loud.
Exercises for Easy-Linking 1) Say the lines below. for a good ten minutes. For each of these attributes or things. Subject: Attributes or "things about" that subject. 2) Say the lines below. This person is good. Small sentence that includes that attribute. and those depending on whether the item is positive or negative.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • • • This That These Those Singular possessive Singular non-possessive Plural possessive Plural non-possessive Anything Anything Anything Anything Positive Negative Positive Negative
You can learn to do this (to choose which of these words to use) in real-time through training!
Tactical Formula for Easy-Linking Use "This" and "These" when referring to anything positive. These people are good. for a good ten minutes. That is not. write a small sentence for each. or singular/plural. or "things about" that subject. These are good. Write down (below) ten attributes. That. This is good. using the correct versions of That. and the correct form of This. Use "That" and "Those" when referring to anything negative.
3) Earlier in the workbook. Those people are not. you have discussed a subject (and written a lot of text about it) that is important to you. These. Those are not. That person is not. That. Those
. out loud.
That. and use as many of the sentences (above) as you can while talking. These. These. and use as many of the sentences (above) as you can while talking. Anchoring Anchoring is associating a feeling or emotional state to a sensory experience. beyond the small bits and pieces of language. and their movement becomes a part of their communication. and the correct form of This. Those
6) Talk out loud about the subject mentioned above for a good 5-10 minutes. That. Great speakers use movement to their advantage. using the appropriate form of This. and then write a small sentence for each. These sections help to train you in these types of techniques.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
4) Talk out loud about that subject for a good 5-10 minutes. 5) Pick another subject. list ten attributes or things about that subject. Subject: Attributes or "things about" that subject. Small sentence that includes that attribute.3
Now we are getting into a different area. D4-T13
2. and once again. and Those.
maybe a motivational speaker. BE excited! Use your hands and arms for emphasis. down. and that you end up talking about with people quite often. make note of where your hands are when speaking. and away from yourself. Pick something YOU are interested in.
Assignments for Pointing and Gestures 1) For the next few days. towards. Then later on see if you can start to become aware of what your hands are doing WHILE you are in the conversation. Use your hands to accentuate certain points. have energy. and that you are passionate about. Subjects
. and some gestures. embedded commands. We will break down many of the component parts of this into skills that we will teach you bit by bit. How often are they in your pockets? How often do they just lie by your side and never move? Make note of this after-the-fact.3. passionate. political speaker.1 Pointing and Gestures D4-T14
Good speakers use their hands. Watch how they move. and way from your sides. or even a preacher. etc). point up. and hopefully the conversations are interesting. so these techniques discussed here will help. 2. 2) Get one of the text lists from an earlier exercise (weasel phrases. However we will focus on things that can create a LOT of effectiveness. etc. and that are very very easy to do. so that the use of these becomes automatic. and to do multiple times. 2) List 3 subjects that you really enjoy. to help make their point. after the conversation has ended. How to • • • do this: Get your hands out of your pockets. Read some of that text (from an earlier exercise) out loud. Don't flail about wildly. Most guys are too boring and too reserved when talking. They may be a bit over-the-top (speaking to an audience is different than speaking one-on-one) but just watch them for a while.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Many different types of anchoring can be done and we are only going to cover some very basic tools. talking about a subject that YOU are interested in. and then we can work on deliberate movement such as • Pointing towards and away from things • Towards yourself and away from yourself
Exercises for Pointing and Gestures 1) Find a good speaker on TV. Move!
We will start by generating SOME movement. Get your hands OUT of your pockets and AWAY from your body! Act excited. etc.
That. and then write a small sentence for each. Anchoring Anchoring is associating a feeling or emotional state to a sensory experience. Small sentence that includes that attribute. and use as many of the sentences (above) as you can while talking.3
Now we are getting into a different area. These. Subject: Attributes or "things about" that subject. Great speakers use movement to their advantage. That. and Those. and use as many of the sentences (above) as you can while talking.
2. using the appropriate form of This. and the correct form of This. D4-T13
. and their movement becomes a part of their communication. beyond the small bits and pieces of language. These sections help to train you in these types of techniques. These. and once again.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
4) Talk out loud about that subject for a good 5-10 minutes. 5) Pick another subject. list ten attributes or things about that subject. Those
6) Talk out loud about the subject mentioned above for a good 5-10 minutes.
and the repetition works for you! • Can do in various contexts. motion. make a note to go ahead and move.) 2) Grab some of your written SS materials.2
Linking Gestures (Towards And Away)
This is a fast and easy way to link positive states to you. Good. and AWAY from your sides and MOVE when talking about these subjects. gesture. very easily. etc. point away. point or gesture towards yourself. Bad. many people move when talking This technique is most powerful when used at a time when emotions and/or imagination are engaged in the conversation. Do something.
Tactical Formula for Linking Gestures Whenever you say something negative. and others. Read that out loud. just start to MOVE.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course For each of these subjects.
Exercises for Linking Gestures 1) Stand up. or at least be able to move. and when anything negative is mentioned. This technique allows you to do this many many times.. recall a recent time when you had such a discussion. point towards yourself. and MOVE! Do this out loud. but this time use your hands. • Or hold your hand away from yourself (to send things "away") How to use it • Good to do in the context of being a person that already MOVES when talking! • Make this subtle. away. As you get more comfortable with this. and animate to some extent the next time you talk about them. or • You can place your hand on your chest or abdomen in a subtle manner (to link things to you) . towards. and send Negative things away • You can point towards or away from yourself. and accentuate what you are saying in order to be more compelling as a speaker and to get even more attention from your listener or audience. Do your best to re-enact that discussion (say what you said. arms. Bring Positive things toward yourself. and every time something positive is being talked about. 3) With these three subjects in mind. Whenever you say something positive. no need to WILDLY gesture! • You can do this many many times.. and to send negative things "away" from yourself.
. make a point to get your hands OUT of your pockets. Say the following out loud while gesturing in the correct direction: Good.3. ANYTHING. etc.
2.). away. Bad (gesture towards. gesture. point or gesture away. and MOVE.
Strategic Formula for Pointing and Gestures Move.
points towards yourself. Do this out loud. Those" correctly Combine these and use them at the same time!
When you say This or These. These.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3) Remember the text we used in an earlier example here in the workbook? Read that out loud. This is veryeasy to do over and over for that repetitive effect. have energy. Do the following out loud:
2. or at least sit where you can move. when anything negative is mentioned. Say "that". point towards yourself and when anything negative is mentioned. Subjects
Do your best to re-enact that discussion. recall a recent time when you had such a discussion. When you say These or Those. Linking Gestures and Easy-Linking together: • • • Use the pointing/gestures on Positive and Negative things (point towards and away). That. (yes. Point away. gesture towards yourself or place your hand(s) on yourself. and every time something positive is being talked about. etc. 2) With these three subjects in mind. Say "this". say what you said.
Exercises for Easy Linking Expanded 1) Stand up. Point to you Negative statement. For each of these subjects.. motion away or place your hands/arms away. That.. make a note to go ahead and use these Linking Gestures to some extent the next time you talk about them. start with a few. Point away Positive statement. Those .3. point away. Point to you Negative Say "those". These. and hopefully the conversations are interesting. these can be the same as the last set of assignments). point away. Start subtle. but you don't have to do it every time! That will seem strange!
Tactical Formula for Easy Linking Expanded Positive statement. etc.
Assignments for Linking Gestures 1) List 3 subjects that you really enjoy. it will become easier and easier. Use "This. and that you end up talking about with people quite often. passionate. Conversely. but this time when you are speaking of anything good or positive.)
Now we bring together Linking Gestures and Easy Linking. Say "these". and MOVE.3
Easy Linking Expanded (Pointing With This. Pick something that YOU are interested in.
These. the more effective it tends to be. touch them This is best done in a "moment" with some emotion. touch them • they seem to go into a pleasant state.3. it's good to be close enough (within arms-length) so that the "touch" is easy to do. On Positive
Let's look at anchoring in light of the 80/20 rule (where 80% of the results come from 20% of the effort). while pointing towards or away from yourself in the correct manner.
Strategic Formula for Easy Linking Expanded Combine the use of Linking Gestures (towards yourself when positive. you are anchoring them in a subtle way.) with Easy Linking (using This. Also. it's more difficult. It may be good to anchor feelings.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Point to yourself. we are doing that already by pointing "towards" on positive things and "away" on negative things using Linking.
. it's very useful to Anchor anything and everything positive to you! In some ways. Use the correct versions of This. etc. and Those. Those in the correct ways) to associate even more positive feelings. These. and thoughts to you but in a general sense. and able to be done many many times. This is more easily done if you are standing at the side or at an angle. But to get even more effectiveness when anything positive happens. a realization. If you are head-on directly in front of a person. an expression. and emotions to yourself.. Point away and say "those" Repeat! This WILL help to train you! 2) Remember the text we used in an earlier example? Speak that text out loud.
2. it will become automatic.Point or Touch.4
Easy Anchoring . These. Do this in a way that maybe makes it seem like you are doing it for emphasis. touch them! This "Easy Anchoring" works in any context: • they laugh. Point away. The more that "emotions" are being accessed. Can we apply this to anchoring? Yes! • We need a way to do some basic anchoring that is very simple. That. specific states. touch them • they smile. That. That. states. and Those if you can. a laugh. Practice it enough and in connection with earlier exercises. or when the person you are talking to goes into a Positive state. Point back to yourself and say "these". and away when negative. trying to add in more instances of This. and say "this". but actually.. and say "that".
and note to yourself the correlation between how long the touch lasted and the level of rapport. intrigue. (Not romantically. • When joking with someone. A laugh A moment of recognition or realization When someone starts talking quietly. vividly. such as. What do you do? You shake their hand. maybe pat on the back. or Topic being discussed
2) Recall those 5 times. See if you can recall how it was.. but yet have some degree of rapport already (maybe this is a friend-of-a-friend.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
You probably do this already in certain situations. also make a point to make and maintain eye contact as well. just a touch. but in many cases.
Exercises for Easy Anchoring 1) Think about the last 5 times where you touched someone in this type of way. make a point to hold it just slightly longer than usual. 2) Spend some time looking for moments (positive ones) where a touch would be appropriate. interest.. and the situation or topic being discussed. etc. • Think about when you meet and are introduced to someone. Also note the degree of eye contact. Person '" Situation. This is the same type of thing.) Maybe a handshake Maybe a pat on the back Maybe a funny gesture Make a note of the person. maybe someone who you have heard about). Write those down. directly to you. without really thinking about it.
Tactical Formula for Easy Anchoring When the person you are talking with displays a positive feeling of some type..
. you grab their upper arm as well. • Think about when you greet a friend. but a bit more "deliberate". laugh. you just touch his or her upper arm or upper back. a smile.
Assignments for Easy Anchoring 1) The next several times you shake someone's hand. touch them to help anchor it to you.
. see if you can have at least 5 instances of knowing. o Linking " with me.. These.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
We are well on our way. think "I could have touched them THEN". but as you notice these moments. Those
. Mouth. anchoring and associating yourself to positive and intriguing feelings in other people helps to make them feel positive towards and intrigued by you. to be cool o Voice Tone And Tonality • Nose. language.. and you have already learned a LOT of the detailed speaking. o Embedded Commands • Can you do this now. 3) Now that you have started to notice these "moments" where a touch would be appropriate. Then. • SPEAKING POINTERS o The "Cool" Factor • You don't have to be cold. that a touch is appropriate. we want you to actually DO IT! So. These. DO IT!
Strategic Formula for Easy Anchoring In general. o Easy-Linking • This. That.. when you have the chance. maybe you don't touch them. and movement skills that will be used later in the course. Suddenly. That. Fast
• Pause o Energy And Enthusiasm • Passionate or Boring? LANGUAGE TOOLS AND DETAILS o Adjectives And Adverbs • Be descriptive o Trance Words • Instantaneously.
2. Chest o Pacing And Pausing
• Slow. Find Yourself o Weasel Phrases • If I were to . in-the-moment. Those MORE TOOLS o Pointing And Gestures • Move! Point! o Linking Gestures • Towards And Away o Easy Linking Expanded • Pointing With This. You are noticing this after-the-fact.
we will move onwards to work on Language Structures.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Easy Anchoring • Point Or Touch On Positive And Negative
With these parts behind you.
. and later to Conversational Management techniques.
. you are lost. and then take them in some direction.. be able to just "do".. You almost NEVER impress people that way! To pace/lead well. but agreeing is just a special case.1 PACE AND LEAD D5-T2
Pace and Lead . These were tactical details. or to try to "impress" them. into higher-level stuff.Some people misunderstand and think that to "Pace" means to "agree". You MAY be able to do that. You might disagree. say things such as. but you need a lot of power to do it and you risk breaking rapport.A way to change directions • In someone's way of thinking • In the conversation To make a change in direction in some manner. Changing Topics and Subjects . show understanding (does not have to be agreement necessarily) and then . Challenges • Can't you just bluntly offer a different view? Yes. telling someone they are wrong..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3. you might make comments (some that agree and some that may not) but the key is that you are "Taking part in" the conversation and topics at hand. Now we are moving "up" a level. o That's one way to see it o I understand your point
. These techniques give you ways to use and arrive at languaging in a manner that will make you more persuasive. For example. It can mean this. but you can break rapport in the process. Are they useful and possible? • • • Trying to knock or jar someone into a different direction or way of thinking can be risky. things that you should not even have to really "think about". move them . then and give them another way of looking at it. acknowledge what the other person is saying. towards where you want things to go. you might bring up a new way of looking at it. but you must do so powerfully and do NOT look for "acceptance". and more influential in general. Fast and abrupt changes . the sort of things that you need to get used to doing automatically. it's best to meet or join someone in some way. but will hopefully at some point. 3. Changing the Viewpoint or Frame if Mind . move with them conversationally for a while. Don't argue! ..0
LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES
D5-T1 We have been working on bits and pieces of language.. The minute you do anything like that to get someone else's "approval". etc. however you can break rapport. or "bigger chucks" as we say.Can you just abruptly jerk a conversation towards where you want it to go? Maybe.Can you just knock someone into agreeing with you? Can you be that bold? Yes..
Pace and Lead allows us to "join" someone. To "Pace" means to just BE a part of the conversation.. Agree or not agree? . incorrect.Some people try to display higher knowledge or value by "arguing". all of the time.
understanding. what you are saying is ..... and/or interest. if you attempt to do that..
Tactical Formula for Pacing and Leading Show agreement.. Then start to move or shift things in a different way.it's like this.. but to really get a sense of being IN the conversation.. I read/saw/heard the same thing ... it makes YOU look bad. The point here is not to memorize these "lines".. Ok. That hardly ever works.. Let me make sure I understand . and some of then want to go out and "impress" people with their newfound knowledge. have you thought about this . • Ok . Instead .1. So.. To TRY to IMPRESS is bad.
Strategic Formula for Pacing and Leading Pacing and Leading allows you "be" in the conversation for a while and gain rapport and information.. or... acknowledgement.. I get it. I see • That's interesting • I get it • Hmmmmm .
Impressing someone with your knowledge. allowing you to move things more in your favor later on. Arguing! Many smart guys study these techniques and technologies... Maybe • • • • • • continue showing an understanding or interest So what you mean is .
3.. I also think you can see .. Let them know you are listening and understand (using wording such as shown below..) • Yes. and then moving things forward in some manner.
Then start to direct things in a different way . as if you "need" their approval. In addition. . showing that you are a part of it.BE IMPRESSIVE! People really don't like to be proven dumb or wrong! Most people are offended or "put off by such attempts... the implication is that you NEED someone's approval. a way that you want. • Well... So if I understand this .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
That's interesting I see what you are saying.1
General Pace and Lead Techniques
Here are some examples of ways to do these steps with example wording for each.. • Alright...
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
I hear you, and what else is interesting is .... •-. That's a good way of looking at it, something else that is important is ....
The Formula for Pacing and Leading is ... acknowledge and then start to shift things ... Maybe you want to shift things more and/or bring up another issue or viewpoint entirely (or maybe you actually disagree) • That's one way of looking at it, however I think ... • Yes, I understand, I have also heard ... • Ok, that makes sense, another way of thinking about it is .. • Alright, but on the other hand... Some general methods you can use to introduce the "leading" aspect, you can talk about... • What you know, believe, understand • What a friend or colleague has said • What you heard • What you read • etc. 3.1.2 Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects D5-T12
Lets say you find some people talking about a topic. Do you walk up, interrupt, and start an entirely new topic? No. (Well, you can, but that takes a lot of power and has a lot of risk.) A better way is to enter the conversation, talk about it (Pace), and then move the conversation into areas that you want it to go (Lead). Examples: • You are in a conversation and the topic is cars. People are talking about prices, loans, etc. You acknowledge what is being said, contribute to that conversation (pace), and then start to bring in the idea of how a car handles, how it feels, and how exciting it is to drive certain cars (lead). • People are discussing clothes, various brands, types, etc. You talk about that with them (pace) for a while, and then start to bring up the idea of how clothes make you feel, how you feel differently when wearing different things ... etc (lead)
Tactical Formula for Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects Show agreement, understanding, acknowledgement, and/or interest in the topic or subject. Then start to move or shift topic or subject in a different way, a way that you want.
Exercises for Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects 1) Think about some recent conversations you have had with people about different topics, hopefully these conversations and/or this topic is something that occurs a lot for you (based on interests you have, people you know, etc). Recall a specific "moment" in each conversation. Note what was being discussed, and what point was being talked about. Make a note of each of them. Also note, where did that actual conversation go next?
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course What were you talking about in this "moment"?
Conversation with whom?
Where did it go next?
2) Pace and Lead Gently Out loud, practice as if you were talking in each of the discussions above, and paced the conversation and topic, and then lead it in some direction. In this exercise, simply show agreement, understanding, and/or interest, and then lead in the same general direction. Maybe bring up a new example, new point, new issue, but just sort of "take over" the conversation. 3) Pace and Lead in a New Direction Next, for each of those instances, provide an example where you show agreement, understanding, and/or interest, but now start to "move" things in a new direction. Maybe the conversation that you had started at this one "point" and went in a specific direction ... Now, for this exercise, practice taking it in a new and different direction. Maybe introduce a different aspect of the topic or subject, something not mentioned before, or not normally talked about. The key is to first show agreement, understanding, and/or interest and THEN do this "shift", and you LEAD things in a different way.
Assignments for Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects 1) Make note of three conversations that you tend to have with people on a regular basis. Person or People Subjects we discuss
2) The next times these conversations happen, make a point to "Show agreement, understanding, and/or interest" (Pace). Then "Then start to move things" (Lead) in your own way, Do this by introducing a different aspect of that topic, or a related topic/subject. Don't make this shift or change really abrupt or different, just make a point to sort of "direct" where things move, even if that direction is close to where it was going anyway. Just make sure YOU are the one that moves it. Note the text and examples given earlier as a way to do that. 3) Once you can do the above, now make a point to have your "Lead" incorporate a real change of some type.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Normally, even without your input, the conversation tends to go in a certain way. The earlier exercise had you just keep thing moving in that same direction. Now you are to "take" the conversation somewhere else towards a different or related topic. Just introduce a new aspect of the topic, a different thing, a different direction, so that you are really "leading" where things go. Remember the language that you were shown earlier. Use languaging like... You know what ELSE is interesting You know what * l * have found (seen, felt) Another way of doing this would be .. You know what ELSE can happen ... is ...
Pace and Lead-Mindset or Frame of Mind
You can change the way people look at things, their mindset, and their "frame of mind". For example, imagine you are having a discussion and people are talking in a certain "frame of mind" (not directly, it's just their way of seeing things). The point here is to acknowledge that frame, and then introduce another way of seeing things, another "frame", or another "mindset". What is • • • • a "frame"? In general it's ... A way someone "sees" something. What it "means" to them. The way they "feel" about it. The significance or meaning that it has.
Looking at the formula for Pace and Lead, you apply that by first acknowledging the current Frame, and then start to lead by bringing up another way of thinking about it and/or looking at it. You bring a new "frame" into the discussion. (This is a way of shifting that way people LOOK at things, the significance that it has, or their mindset regarding certain topics or behaviours). In the earlier example of Pacing and Leading of Topics and Subjects, we were talking just about a thing, a topic, or subject. Now we are talking about a feeling, or the way things are "seen" or what they "mean". For example, people may be talking about: • Taking risks • Feeling good or bad • Having a good day or a bad day • Making choices • What an event "meant" to them • How someone else actions affected them • How a decision affected them. There is a "frame" (of mind) behind each of these discussions and with proper technique, that frame and mindset may be changed. Look back at the "Methods" section earlier for some details and examples of how to introduce this pacing and leading (there are some lists of languaging examples provided). Examples: • You enter a conversation where people are talking about risks, Risks at work, risks in finances, risks in life. You Pace by discussing this for a while. The frame or mindset here is that risks are bad, dangerous,
Make a note of each of them. or may be perfect but with the wrong hair color (lead). The frame you are bring up is how superficial it is to judge based on numbers and details. and what "kind" of man she likes (height. Do this OUT LOUD. You agree on some level (pace) and chat about that.. and then lead it in some direction..Mindset or Frame of Mind Show agreement. Recall a specific "moment" in the conversation. Then start to move or shift the frame by introducing another way of looking at things. What it "means" to them. or provide a relevant example. acknowledgement. and you are working to change the way she screens out guys. who is like 5 lbs overweight. Just sort of "take over" the conversation. etc). With whom? Topic? Mindset / Frame of Mind
2) Pace and Lead Gently Practice as if you were talking in that discussion. the frame of mind or mindset is the focus here.
. the viewpoint. and/or interest in the Mindset or Frame of mind. then start to move into talking about how men do this as well. some risks have good rewards. and how anyone of quality . What was the "frame". (You are shifting her frame so that she may start to look at different things in men. Then you start to lead by bringing up the idea that some risks are fun and interesting. The way they "feel" about it. • Another conversation has a woman talking about what she looks for in men. the people. and/or interest in the mindset or frame of mind . understanding... etc. the assumption? What is the frame of mind behind the viewpoints that they had? Write down the topic.. In this exercise simply Show agreement.)
Tactical Formula for Pace and Lead . and the "frame" that was in use.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
have consequences. Towards a way that you want. where the point of the discussion in that moment was: The way they "see" something.
Exercises for Pace and Lead . some risks make you feel alive. and paced it. now its being framed as exciting). Note what was being discussed. then lead in the same general direction. understanding. weight. looks for more.Mindset or Frame of Mind 1) Think about some recent conversations you have had with people about different topics. Again. (Risk was framed as dangerous. she talks about what their professions are. a new meaning.. Maybe bring up a similar way of looking at it.. some men will just "write off a woman that is a certain size. The frame here is that she has her "standards" and that this is good for her... etc. what point was being talked about.
etc someone looks at a political issue. you are just acknowledging the Mindset or Frame in this example. maybe even limiting beliefs or beliefs that really hold them back. and their motivations
Write down these subjects. even if that direction is close to where it was going anyway. Don't make this really abrupt or different. Basically. some way. for each of those instances. Do this by introducing a "way of looking at it" that is similar to the one that is already being used. and/or interest" (Pace). The key is to first Show agreement. Maybe find a way. Maybe bring up a way of looking at things that is totally different. With whom? Subject/Topic? Mindset / Frame of Mind
2) Pace and Lead Gently The next times these conversations happen. Examples: someone complains a lot. and makes assumptions (has a certain frame) about people or groups. to find a positive way of looking at the situation. a frame of reference. A good way to do it is to show agreement and understanding. and THEN do this "shift". but really his mindset is the problem someone talks about wanting something different. understanding. Do this OUT LOUD for each example. and HE is the one with the limitation someone complains about work and the managers. and the frame associated with each. and they are the one not taking risks someone is prejudiced or judges other people.
Assignments for Pace and Lead . or something someone said. but just make a point to sort of "direct" where things move. understanding. or something you heard or read. and/or interest.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
3) Pace and Lead in a New Direction Next. what it "means" that is not really in agreement with what was said. and/or interest in the Mindset or Frame of Mind but now start to "move" things in a new direction. and you LEAD things in a different way. make a point to "Show agreement. and maybe point out a similar example from your own life.
. Think about discussions where YOU can see that these people involved are working on a certain set of assumptions. Maybe acknowledge and then bring up an opposing view. and says they are cheap.Mindset or Frame of Mind 1) Make note of three conversations that you tend to have with people on a regular basis. Then "start to move things" (Lead) in your own way. Maybe bring up a different viewpoint or way of looking at it. understanding. provide an example where you Show agreement. These should be of a type where THE "frame" or mindset is something of which you are aware.
. but it can work well and adds to the power of the languaging.. o As you realize ..... or assumed by the people involved.. o As you see . o While you see . What is done here is that you Pace based on something that is obvious (obvious in their "current reality"). A friend of mine used to feel the same way and they. point towards a specific Mindset or Frame that is of YOUR choosing. o While you think . Meaning.... or used by very powerful speakers. Now you are to "take" the conversation somewhere else and bring up a new mindset or frame of mind. This may be different from the way the subject or belief WAS framed or thought of.. it might not be that bad. these techniques are used a LOT.. "Pace" their mindset. but just find a positive way to look at what is being discussed. o After you have ...4
Pace and Lead .1. Continue to Pace by maybe stating an obvious point about their current reality o seeing XYZ o feeling XYZ o thinking about XYZ o etc. o As you feel. Some ways to do that is by saying things such as.. now make a point to have your "Lead" incorporate a real change of some type. Well.. focus on the Mindset or Frame.... The general way to approach this is: • Start by pacing something that is obvious about their current reality . even without your input. another way of looking at it is .Current Reality
If you look at the languaging used in things like hypnosis. A "safe" way to do this would be to find a positive way to look at the situation.... there was a certain "frame" being discussed. using words such as) o As you are .
3. Just introduce a new frame. and/or express what is on their mind. and allow the conversation to continue with the same frame of mind in place.. Again. a new mindset.. o While you are . o While you are . a new aspect of "what it means". and new way of looking at things. o etc. (for example.. You know.... This is a small-chunk detail and technique... • At least it's not like XYZ... it could be . The earlier exercise had you just sort of "run" with that. o You are probably wondering
.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3) Pace and Lead In a New Direction Once you can do the above. and then use that to lead someone somewhere..
Current Reality As (while ) you) are "X" (Pace) Where "X" is something that is true in their current reality (perceptions.2 GIVE THEM A REASON D5-T32
Give someone a reason for someone to listen . o you will then . and do." • You will hear a LOT of this in this course (which is part of your re-programming!)
Tactical Formula for Pace and Lead .. o state what you want them to see/feel/hear/realize
Examples: • As you are listening to this program ... Point them to where you want to lead them ..) • Then you will "Y" Where "Y" is something you want them to experience (Lead)
Exercises for Pace and Lead . etc.. what you are thinking.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
o As you are thinking about o I know you are concerned about o The issue that may be on your mind is o The question you may have is Begin to lead .. o you will start to notice o you may realize o you may start to think o you may see how .." • Physical demos use this a lot. what you are hearing.. Rewind or go back a few tracks. o another thing you will see/feel/notice is .. Really pay attention and see how many times I have done pacing and leading in this manner... and "As that feeling builds....... what you are reading. Make note of how many times I have paced your current reality. "As you feel this. o notice what its like as . 3..Pacing Reality too much can seem arrogant.. then you are probably wondering .....
Warning .. you will begin to notice this ... it starts to become annoying to the listener. thoughts.. the more it will "sink in".. • You are talking to someone at work ... If you spend too much time saying things similar to "I know what you are thinking". "as you are watching this presentation .Current Reality 1) Listen to this section again. The more you hear this.. Studies have been done with persuasive language that show that giving a reason will make people more apt to do things for you and agree with you.".
because I am really in a hurry" then. just providing a reason. Write these down. asking "can I pay by credit card". The examples will be better if these are people you do not know. "hey. they may go with you. or at least people that are not close friends of yours. lets move over there". remarkably. you don't need to be concerned about these things. or asked someone to do something.
Tactical Formula for Give Them a Reason Request X because (of) Y
Exercises for Give Them a Reason 1) Make note of the last five times you asked someone for something. Write these down. if you say "Is it ok if I make copies next. but put in a reason of some type. anything. You are not being apologetic or anything.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Don't worry about "losing your power" or being too "nice". However. 3) Go through the same list again. come up with another reason.
Assignments for Give Them A Reason 1) Make note of five routine situations that you have in your life where you are asking for something.
. then it may be difficult to get people to agree. Examples: • You walk up to a copier at work and there are three people in line. and out loud. If you just say. it just helps to make people more agreeable (and there are statistics to support that as well). However. requesting something. If you say. It could be asking for coffee. the addition of this small "reason" will make people much more agreeable and apt to let you do what you would like. Person What did you ask for?
2) Practice out loud how you might "ask" for that favor or make that request again. if you say "Let's move over there because it's more quiet" you will be amazed at how much more agreeable the person may be. This technique does not provide a 100% guarantee. "Is it ok if I make copies next". • You are talking to someone and you would like to pull her aside and make the conversation more private.
just as an example) • Hypnotists use this technique a LOT. which support your point. 3) The next times these situations come up in your day-to-day life. • When you give a reason. See if you can make it automatic. in order to provide more power to what you are saying. so that your one "opportunity" in a conversation to make "a" point.
Tactical Formula for General Listing When making a point. and quite well. • When you give several reasons at once. you get someone to agree and then lead them 3. actually ends up being several points. statement.
. and flow easily. People) What do you ask for?
2) Practice out loud some "reasons" that you could give in these situations.3. the items that you will "list" need to be brief points. • Training for sales people use this quite a bit. • For the sake of a conversation. Power in Numbers .3
Listen to an example where many of these are used. This technique has been developed based on observing how many good and influential people speak: • Successful sales people • Charismatic speakers • Good debaters • Component of hypnotic languaging « Very important. don't just provide one reason.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Situation (Place.Repetition in a way that serves you. point.1 General Listing D6-T4
Strategic Formula for General Listing General Listing is a way to quickly provide several reasons. it's difficult to debate them all or object to them all (not to be combative. "List" several things or examples which support your point. provide several. or excuse. go ahead and mention the "reason". or make a point. or giving an example. or make a statement.
3. • This is somewhat similar to a "pace and lead".
make them brief. and still. and/or what it's like to meet people. For each conversation. and maybe 3 different things that support your "point".2. 5) Think of three recent conversations you have had with people where you were making a point.. Y. maybe trying to convince someone of something (NOT an argument-just that you were making a point and would like to be more persuasive).." and mention those three different ways. etc.. 3. briefly. Mention the first item. but as you listen to it (1). and somewhat new (3). really recall listing to good speakers (2). what point you were trying to make. a. doing some type of work. playing a game.. Z"...) • I know this may sound a bit different (1). as in saying three items . Then. Listing can be short. Write them down. 3) Pick an example of an activity that you do often.. and start to think about in a positive way (3). talk about it for a sentence or two. strange (2). true. write down who it was with. Each of the items in a list can also be much longer. Now. maybe watching sports. Do that out loud.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Example (see the listed items shown as 1. Select a particular aspect of that activity. Something you are interested in. Now try again by expounding on each of the items. Maybe your first two items in a list are obvious.. what are three ways that can go? Good? Bad? Indifferent? Exciting? Boring? Pick three and write these down What are three "ways" that the experience of "meeting people" can go?
2) Now practice out loud by saying something like "Isn't it interesting how you can meet people and it happens in different ways? I mean sometimes . and the types of things to which no one would object.each of which lasts just a few seconds. Z (selecting your items listed above). etc. sometimes . listing is like pacing and leading. but instead you talk ' about each for a few moments.. partying. etc.
Exercises for General Listing 1) Lets say you are talking to someone about "Meeting people". the third item may tend to "lead" someone in some way.X and then other times . Who you were talking to
. so that you don't just say "X. Pick three ways that can go . Y... as a list. Activity that you like or do often List a particular part of aspect of that activity What are three "ways" that can go? "
4) Now describe "What its like to do your activity . In many ways. you may begin to agree. where each lasts several minutes. then the second...
and tends to make THAT point the most important one. at times you want to use listing as a way to highlight or focus upon one item. it makes it seem as if you are being fair. out loud. However. Now practice. However.At The End
If several items are mentioned in a list (for example a car. and just providing a series of options. we were talking about three points in a list that all were similar. Who you were talking to Point you were trying to make Three items that support your "point"
Listing .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Point you were trying to make Three items that support your "point"
b. activity. how you could bring up these three points in a list-like manner. by placing YOUR preferred item at the end. Maybe you want to list several options or examples. Here is a way to think about it. Placing that particular item at the end of a list can have that effect. Do that for each of the three examples above. it's easy to think of that
3. Therefore. and an elephant) what tends to "stick" in your mind? (The Elephant!) The last item! By hanging an item at the end of a list. You weren't trying to emphasize one point vs. Who you were talking to Point you were trying to make Three items that support your "point"
6) Recall a specific moment in each conversation. Normally. or different types of alternatives (to a thought. the other.3. the one that comes to mind the easiest is the one that YOU want someone to agree with. Maybe you want your list to contain many options. you put more emphasis on it. etc) By doing that. a table. you were just listing several things in a list. it sticks in the listener's head more. In the earlier Listing examples.
Again.. o You know what it's like when you meet someone .. c)!
Strategic Formula for Listing . o It could suck. Examples • • Fun activity. but by placing "it could be fun" last. or maybe you are really seeing the power of all of this! I think you can tell which option I was going for! Meeting People. you know? See how I did that? See how the item which I really wanted them to think about.
. and then finish with YOUR preferred item.. you eventually find this person that on some level. I know.. or it could really be fun.A t The End Listing at The End is a way to provide several options (which may differ) but to emphasize the option that YOU want. did you notice the use of the words this/that/these/those? Also where do you think I might have been pointing and gesturing during those examples? Job interview o Have you talked to many candidates? Yes. and the third one "eventually find this person" was the one I wanted to really "stick". you know that those people are NOT qualified (1) o Others you maybe have thought were ok at first. o Other times you get that sort of a "friend" vibe with that person.. and there is just something about this person. o May be frustrating to you. lets say you are talking about doing some activity. one after another. Now those are different ways of seeing it. or they just have the right answers (c). how they can almost become a blur. I mean. right away. you know . 3). Again let's bring up this example of "meeting people". the more convinced you are that that person is NOT the one! o Hopefully though. those people doesn't mean much either way . it could be boring. this is one of those subtle but very powerful things that many persuasive speakers do a LOT. Say that one LAST and bring up two other options.. but even when describing that person. I have had to do that myself at times. It's just a matter of getting to this person. examples.. you just really click and you feel this connection .. See? Not only did I have a list of three (1.2. I put another list within THAT description (a.. Sometimes there is nothing special. maybe it's boring.that is the one (3). was said that at the end? By the way.. interesting. etc . but you spend some time with that person (2) and the more that person talks. you put more emphasis on it and it tends to make that one "stick" more. you just know .. b. It may be because you like the resume (a). or instances FIRST.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
one. When I have interviewed a lot of people. This course. They are not all the same.. In general. o And other times . they sort of fell into several groups o There are some people that. you meet someone... they are nice. or this person presents himself really well (b).. It's interesting though..
but place some more emphasis on that last item. If you say
.. At times however. Three things that you and your friends could do (activity)
2) Practice. and what the result is that YOU want. 4) What is an example from your life (recently). out loud. In that case. "List" several things briefly in order.At The End When making a point. Maybe you want to suggest something very direct or quite controversial and you do NOT want to give it too much prominence. buy some thing.). Maybe add an embedded command of some type.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Tactical Formula for Listing . where you are trying to convince people to do something. and they are haggling or objecting a bit. it makes sense to "bury" that item in the middle of a list. placing something at the end can add to its power and make it stand out. but bury it inside a list. but mention the one which YOU want to put the most emphasis on. and we always have fun . Here is a way to think about it. 3) Do that again. is the item you mention LAST.At The End 1) Lets say you are going to spend a day or evening with some friends. maybe controversial. Maybe add a small "list" within that last item (because it's inexpensive.
Exercises for Listing . Examples: • Sales .3
Listing . it can be TOO obvious. However. and seem too direct. and therefore you do NOT want it to stick out too much. Go ahead and suggest that item.Let say you arc trying to get someone to buy something. out loud. etc. close.. Issue or Option What do you want?
5) Now. talk about the issue. Maybe pause when saying it. make sure that the one that YOU want to do. statement. etc.3. You may want to "test" to see how the person will react to it. LAST. go somewhere. List three possible things that you could do and write these down. and you are all figuring out how you are going to spend your time. and bring up at least two other "options" BEFORE you mention the one option that you want. or giving an example.? Write down what the "issue" is. agree to some point. You want to mention or suggest something that is quite strong.Burying Items
When using a List.
3. mentioning all of these in a list.
.. maybe you aren't ready to buy this now.. or maybe I'll call you tomorrow". that you will just seize this chance and get it while you can! That sounds almost TOO forceful. it seems too obvious. more powerful and direct statement in the middle. just suggesting. Lets say your idea is so controversial and over-the-top. or to maybe see if you can get someone to agree to it!
Tactical Formula for Listing . you can get away with an outrageous or very direct option by burying that option in the middle of a List. and you are talking about you two getting together sometime. that may be a GOOD sign. The idea of " seize this chance and get it while you can" is something rather challenging to say (as the seller) that directly.. honestly. Very direct. or possibly you just still want to negotiate . See? Putting that one. its your choice. There are several options but. more "appropriate" items to lighten it up. If she gasps and has a look of shock and horror when you make that suggestion. you don't just say "we can slip the deadline". or possibly you still want to negotiate. maybe you seize this chance and get it while you can .Burying Items Listing .
Instead of thinking about it in terms of a list. But of she smiles and seems interested. o "well. Sometimes you have that "direct" item in mind and you surround it with other. However. it's your choice. it seems a bit easier for you to say it.
Strategic Formula for Listing . and when you say it at the end like that. "let's slip the deadline" might be a problem in some circles! So when people are talking about options to help the project. and maybe there is a possibility of you even spending that night together. seems to "lighten" it up somehow. maybe you aren't ready to buy this now.Lets say you have met a women at a party. It also allows you a chance to watch the persons reaction to it. bury it inside a list.. we can talk in a few days.. This is also a good way of testing someone's response... lets say that you want to say something or suggest something that is very direct. So maybe you say something like o "Well. maybe it IS too direct.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
"Well." Doesn't that sound better? Meeting at a Party . that you are almost "worried" about how the listener may react. Instead. For example. But if you switch the order. we can leave together right now.Burying Items When giving examples or options to someone.Burying Items is a way to mention an outrageous or very direct option for "testing" purposes. one of them is to just slip the deadline. lets say you are working on a project and things are behind schedule.. or maybe you want it so much.
but do it by burying it in a list. in the middle and see if it is a bit easier to imagine saying that list. or the most direct item. Try saying it with the strongest item at the end. Go ahead and change the order of the list that you used earlier. If there is not one. if you do it TOO much or too blatantly. After these situations occur.Burying Items 1) Go back to the previous exercises where you said some "lists" out loud. Bury the strongest item. you may even want to say it in a joking way. make a point (afterward) to think about that outrageous option. Look at the items that were listed and see if one of them maybe seemed very "strong" or "direct". but as with any technique. Situation Outrageous or Direct Suggestion you could have made.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Exercises for Listing . Situation Outrageous or Direct Suggestion
4) For each of those examples (above) go ahead and practice out loud. see if it seems easier to say. as any opportunities come up where you would like to make an outrageous or quite direct suggestion. 2) Practice out loud how you would say that list in the situation you used in the previous exercise. it can stand out too much and be annoying.Burying Items 1) As you go out and live your life. but see if you CAN say it. you will probably encounter some situations where you might want to suggest something quite outrageous or direct. go ahead and create a new item that is very outrageous or direct. and then trying saying that item in the middle.
Assignments for Listing . Try it out loud. suggesting a List of options but burying that outrageous option in a list.
Listing can be powerful. by burying it in a list. 3) Think of some recent situations where you would have liked to mention a quite outrageous or direct suggestion.
. write down an outrageous or very direct suggestion that you would have liked to make (for each). For three different situations that have come up in your life recently. go ahead and do so.
2) In the near future. and go ahead and practice how you COULD have said it. See if you can make it sound natural.
you are walking someone through a series of steps or thoughts. while incorporating the language tools we have already discussed. D6-T38
You have heard language like "The more X. we are pacing and leading. the more Y
. then. if it's a VERY outrageous option. changing tone. Using pauses.3.. then the more Y. o See how that is being used here? • We have discuss language details . Maybe you want to stress one item more or less..4
Listing. etc". place that item at the END of the List for more power. The general structure here is: • • The more X o where X is something that is hopefully quite obvious and true to the listener . etc.3. the more Z". In a way.. and the more Y. Or. 3. then the more Y.. So.5 Listing Review D6-T37
If you want to get your point across. In a way. so this all works in your favor! Just be interesting enough to keep their attention. in a List. 3. really.. consider this: • We talked about listing .. o See how we are listing several items? • We discuss Pace and Lead . Pauses. o See how they are incorporated. and see how. Lets use this as a chance to really step back for a moment and look at this structure.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3. and using lists.. and Emphasis
You may be worried about coming up with three things in a list . "the more YOU FEEL this ..How do you think of them quickly? How do you make them sound natural? Don't worry! It is ok to have pauses! Pauses make things sound more natural and gives you time to come up with options! We talked about the use of pauses as a way to convey some drama and to make things interesting. and they WILL stay through the pauses! As you are saying various items in a list.. this is just a way of bringing together many of the things we have learned.. to "pull" the listener in. and I just strung those together .." "More and More" is just a way to use these and bring them together. or experience. then present it buried within a List of options. thinking about languaging such as "The more X.. I gave an example (in the audio) of several things I wanted someone to do. then mention several of your points or examples that support what YOU want. but have ONE that YOU really want to emphasize or get people to agree to. and provide many examples to support it.. think.4 MORE AND MORE.. emphasis. can help to alter how the options (and you) are perceived.. remember to use emphasis and change your voice tone with the items. as in . Maybe one or more of the items actually has an embedded command in it. If you must suggest several different examples or options.
That's a general version of it. You are "leading" someone. then.
Tactical Formula for More and More The more X.... future) can be altered to make it fit well. As an alternative. see it as just a way of using many of the things we have already covered! More and More tends to be best thought of as a "List".) specific. agreeable... etc. • Sell TV sets. Instead of seeing this as a new type of language. which is more of an example of using Pace and Lead of their current reality. and as Y happens o or as you sense Y. the more Y. or as Y is happening . towards what YOU want. and something obvious.. present. with "as X is happening". You can even start by "pacing" a bit more. 2. from a general item towards something that YOU want. then the more Z starts to happen. • • • • As you (or while you) X . or a new "pattern".. or thoughts) use "More and More" as a way to string them together (and increase your chances of that happening. The best way to do this is to start off with the first item as quite general.. then just list them but use "more" as a way to go from one to the next. o walk someone through though process . the More Y....) item. etc
How to use it. ... As you X. etc). THEN make the next item (more. or realize Y. step 1. and the more Y happens .. the more Z. The More Z. If you have something that you want to lead someone through.. and even more so with the next (more.. you notice this. as you feel this. 3. The small words and verb tenses (past.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
o Where Y is something that is a logical extension of what the listener knows and they see this as something that makes sense . more and more. the More Y... etc
Examples • Convincing friends to go do something that you want to do. like a series of successive steps (things you do. the More Z....
. o You can start off with something obvious as a statement to kind of pace them. The more Y. and then use More and More to lead them forward . you can use "as you" or "while you" as a way to bridge between sections as well.
Strategic Formula for More and More If you want to lead someone through a series of steps (actions. or "as you notice X".. the more you can notice Y . then. experiences.) or thoughts (things you experience or think about.
maybe an activity. of what you want to have happen. o Walk her through the process. practice saying those three steps. Think about a series of steps.
Exercises for More and More 1) Consider the idea of convincing some friends of going to a movie. that start off in general. What do you want to convince someone to do Three steps. The first should be obvious. The first should be obvious.
5) Out loud. etc . a trip. Don't just say "more". as you. something with which you are familiar. Do the series several times. to get towards doing what you want. while you. practice and see if you can talk about these one by one. or series of thoughts or actions. if the person followed them. "as you" or "while you". they would end up doing what you wanted. etc. etc. or as alternatives. the second.. what project to work on. something. that would "walk" the other people through the process of agreeing with you. and bridging between them as we discussed earlier (More..)
. but more and more get closer to what YOU want. what to do. a plan. to get towards doing what you want.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Talking to a woman . more leading. practice saying those in series.. something simple. or something you want to lead people to do somehow. (Agree where to go to dinner. what to buy. Write these down.
3) Now out loud. Think of three "steps".. and string them together using "more".. as if in a conversation. more in your direction. or have them experience. You may start with "As you" or "while you" for the first one. who should do what. more and more. What you were trying to convince a friend to do Three steps. a movie.) Write down three steps. Think of all of the things you can do tonight Realize that going to a movie would be a good idea Going to see the latest XYZ movie (use whatever movie you wish) See how that is a series of steps? Of thoughts? Like leading someone down a path? Now out loud. Do that several times. 4) Think of another series from your life. etc. something you convince people to do (or wish you could).. 2) Think of the last time you were trying to convince a friend to do something. work around it and make it sound natural. The next is another step in the series. using "More". Think of three "steps". a series of thoughts or actions that.
. seductive. and piece them together and have it sound natural. the more you will understand how they fit together. it's just a good way to think about discussing a subject. • It also a great way to get information about the person with which you are speaking. • How two things are similar • How two things are different • Good .another option • Black . and move a conversation.
There are various means of doing this. the more things like "knowing what to say" and "what pattern to use" will become easier and easier for you! Notice how we are not doing these examples necessarily with women? Wonder why? 3. A Tactic for Talking • Too many guys let a good conversational subject finish far too quickly. So. The more that happens.Bad • One option . look for opportunities to use that in your life. and you discuss these two aspects using Compare and Contrast. exciting. where you could have a series of "states" lead someone through the process of doing what you want. • It's not magical in a persuasive sense. • This works especially well if the subject of the discussion is one that "works" for our purposes (fun.White • Right .) • Too many guys focus on standard lines such as "So what do you like about X". • You are just comparing and contrasting things. How to use it. and even change the specifics of that sequence. Practice that series more! Get very familiar with it.. you can talk about. to continue. you are able to easily go through such a "sequence".Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Assignments for More and More 1) In the exercises.5 COMPARE AND CONTRAST D6-T54
Listen to an example where many of these are used. This method provides a way to keep the conversation going.. etc. or else have the person you are speaking with mention it.
You will see that the more you get these bits and pieces. 2) With that "More and More" sequence practiced. Maybe add or change some of the reasoning.. or various aspects of a subject. But get to the point where you can flow easily through the 3 in a series.Left
. this is a means to keep speaking. or several different subjects. This Compare and Contrast method here gives you a way to talk about and around the subjects at hand. becoming more and more convinced. Maybe just try 2 of the 3 steps once or twice. • • Take a subject and either mention another aspect of that subject. we had you think of something from your life. you have two (or more) aspects of a topic. Just make sure that with that subject.
• You talk to someone for a while and she say she likes scuba diving. This all provides a good way to allow the discussion to continue for a while. o You select two items. what they do not. her. what they like. How do these differ How are they the same Which is good-bad.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
One aspect . link away. o While talking about what she does like. • Anything bad. or point in a discussion . and contrast these things. • Notice what is liked and not liked • Notice any reactions. Select another subject. you can talk about one car. two facets of that subject. and to let the person think about. Use the other language tools during the discussion.
Strategic Formula for Compare And Contrast Use this technique to keep the conversation going. and discuss whether the handling makes it better. then discuss these by comparing and contrasting.
. compare. and this situation that you are sharing. feelings. deciding to focus on making a good living now..
Tactical Formula for Compare And Contrast Take any subject. you can anchor and link positive things to you! o While talking about things she does not like. this meeting.another aspect -. etc. easy-difficult. and start to compare and contrast the two. As you are talking. team sports. associate them with things other than you. that are good for you. • Link anything good to you. • Decisions about a career or job. and you start to talk about something she likes and enjoys doing. Then discuss the other car. o Maybe you start to ask her about it (have a discussion with her .about her) and she mentions various things about that subject. another brand. or individual sports vs. you can use all of the other tools we have discussed. and talk about its attributes as well. states. etc. and feel those states and emotions for a while as well. idea.another attribute
As you are talking. the offense or the defense. • • Use opportunities to use commands and trance words to create thoughts. keep the discussion focused on a topic that serves your purposes. You discuss this. good or bad. or its power. What is different about each? How are they the same? How are they experienced? What is good? What is bad? etc. better-worse. you can take note of how the person is responding. One attribute . experience. • Maybe what is more important to a sports team.. or point in a discussion. you can anchor those away from yourself. taking a position with a more promising future. • You may talk to a woman. idea. vs. and incorporate the language tools.
Examples • One brand of car vs.
. the same holds true even when discussing what you do NOT like... Letting Go Safety and Excitement Liking someone mentally and/or physically o
• • • •
Exercises for Compare And Contrast 1) Pick some possession that you have that you REALLY like (car.. change your tone of voice. etc. and put effort into correct linking/anchoring/pointing to associate positive things to you. where they were really describing or talking about something they like. she finds the experience of seeing new and different things to be interesting as well. She says she likes the aspect of it being very quiet and serene under water. then I KNOW that you would NOT like THIS .". Be vary aware that even when you are discussing the thing you "Like". and this time. be very aware of the positive and negative things that are being said. that they do like
Do the re-enactment again. she mentions various things about it. Also. offer the compare-contrast ways of discussing it.. Something New Control vs. 4) Select two of the following 4 topics. that within that may be attributes that are good. but this time put some effort into being very aware of the positive and negative things that are being said. different computer. Familiarity vs. Subject or thing that they like Attributes (things about) that."Oh. peace. and those that are not good. and various things about that subject or topic that they like. Re-enact that conversation again. bike. and talk about it again.. This example uses a very obvious "Like vs. different style of clothing. 3) Recall a recent conversation with someone you know. etc). and serenity on one hand o and compare and contrast that to the feeling of something new and different on the other. somewhere else.
. Something that you like Something that is opposite 2) Now take that same topic. Now think of what is opposite to that . your pacing. Not-Like" set of things to compare and contrast. and compare/contrast the two. and this time.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Maybe you ask about it. etc. clothes.. In addition. Use compare and contrast to talk about each of the attributes that your friend would say they like about that subject. Maybe some of the language that you are using that may lend itself to be embedded commands... and anchor/link/point appropriately.. so if you like THAT. Be mindful of that and anchor/link appropriately." or .same type of thing (another car. Now talk out loud about each.(because). Be descriptive! Use pauses. computer.. o So we talk about the feeling of quiet. and negative things . etc). Be aware of your language! Throw in adjectives and adverbs. As in "so let me make sure I understand this . etc.
. and parts of a person 3.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Control vs. and you lose out on spending a LOT of time having them discuss something that she REALLY likes! This is just a way to have a discussion. Letting Go Safety and Excitement Liking someone mentally and/or physically Familiarity vs.6 PARTS D7-T1
Listen to an example where these are used. this just helps to keep things moving in a conversation. Who knows. YOU are then showing someone how BOTH of these things can be experienced. exciting. Parts. and get them to talk about what THEY are interested in. Meaning. and say (for example) "what do you like most about scuba diving" or "what is the most fascinating thing about. together. 3. then talk about all of the various aspects and parts of it. Too many guys just blow things to quickly. and that's ALL you discuss. Think about the possibilities. some are bad • Talk about the good parts. Two types of parts we can work with .1 Parts Of A Subject D7-T4
This is a variation on the contrast principle. Parts of a subject.
For even more Power There IS a very powerful aspect of this technique that is important to mention. topic. you can show someone how that can be possible. theme. Excitement. it's too weak. People tend to think you have one OR the other. that is fun." and that's ALL they talk about! Yes. However there ARE ways to have BOTH. etc. Some are good. Something New Now do your best to speak out loud and "talk" about these for a while using a Compare and Contrast structure. link away Now this may seem tough . BOTH linked and anchored to YOU. Safety vs.. For example. link them to you • If the bad or boring parts some up.. but when you go STRAIGHT for the BEST thing that she likes the MOST.. this doesn't necessarily show that you
. By comparing and contrasting them. and the positive aspects of excitement. If you are talking about an interesting subject. it is GOOD to focus on the positive aspects of what she likes. if you are asking many questions about something that is NOT of interest to you. of having all of the positive aspects of Safety.Who wants to talk about something that you are NOT interested in? However. you may end up liking the subject and find a new activity for yourself! Don't worry that you will "give the wrong impression" by inquiring and discussing these "parts". etc. There ARE many things that people tend to THINK of in an "either-or" way. this provides a good way to train you to be able to talk and ask questions of people.6.
. know about. o Where have they dived? o How did they get into it? o What's their favorite place? o Do they have their own equipment? o Do they use different types of equipment for different locations? o How long have they dived? o Have they ever been in danger? o Have they taken photos? o Have they met interesting people? o Has this exposed them to any other cool sports or activities? o etc. activity. Break it down into its component parts and discuss them. and she may have a lot of positive emotions and feeling associated with that . If someone asks you about this.
. etc. be comfortable talking about all of the parts of that subject. it's hard to talk about that subject for a while. just say "I like learning about people.
Exercises for Parts of a Subject . etc.
Strategic Formula for Parts of a Subject Discussing many of the parts of a subject keeps the conversation going. list various "things" about that subject. This isn't just a way for you to ask ask ask HER about things.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
are interested in it (the subject). topics come up. Now.many of which can be linked to you. maybe a hobby.. This is a great way to build rapport with a person as well.. etc. what people do. and enjoys. area of interest. just curious. Use the language tools in the discussion. artistic endeavor. don't just ask "What is the most exciting thing about Scuba Diving?" That IS a good question. If she LIKES scuba diving. 1) Pick a subject that you like. that you know. allowing you time to gather information and link yourself to good thoughts. feelings and emotions. feelings and emotions to yourself. that an opportunity to talk for a WHILE about something she likes. like. new things. Subjects come up.
Examples • Scuba Diving . sport.
Tactical Formula for Parts of a Subject Take any subject. don't like. or point in a discussion.Don't just "talk about" Scuba Diving! Or." This technique makes it easier to have conversations with people because THEY are giving you information and ideas for new things to ask about. You are just asking. but if you start there. idea. Link good thoughts.
Person: Subject: Parts. someone you met at a party. Now. or maybe someone in your life that you don't know very well. Maybe their hobby.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course For example. This should be someone you know well. That Subject:
2) Think of one of your friends or family members and some activity or topic that THEY are really into. and you were going to have someone (who knows very little about the subject) interview you and learn all about football. a job they like. Write these down. but hopefully this "subject" is something you are not really into. Subject: Parts. if your subject was football. if you were going to talk to them for like 30 minutes about that subject and were really going to ask them about it. what would you ask about? What are all of the various things and aspects of it that YOU could inquire about or that could come up in a discussion? These are the "parts" of that subject. make a list of these parts. passion. Someone that you recently met. If you have trouble. maybe a cousin you hardly see or talk to.
. maybe pick a different "person" as your subject. etc. and you have heard him or her talk about this. You should be able to come up with at least 10 items. like a co-worker. You should easily be able to come up with 10-20 items. That Subject:
3) Now think of someone who you are NOT close to (that you do not know that well). Now think of something that THAT person is interested in or they are involved with. or Things About. or Things About. etc. what parts about football would you want them to ask about? For your chosen subject.
you should be able to list at least 10 items. Make a point to ask about many different parts of that subject. what would you ask about? What are all of the various things and aspects of it that YOU could inquire about? What are the PARTS you could ask about? Write these down. You know the person but you are not real close to them. when you are speaking with a friend or family member that you know well. while YOU are there And you are linking and anchoring things to yourself Using all of the language tools and details And that person is finding YOU so fascinating and charismatic . The subject they are interested in is something with which you are NOT familiar. make a point to have a good 10-15 minute conversation about a subject that THEY are really interested in. make a point to have a good 10-15 minute conversation about a subject that THEY are really interested in. or Things About. Make a point to ask about many different parts of that subject. They are talking about something THEY like Thinking about it. Again. Person: Subject: Parts. 2) Sometime in the future. off the "top of your head". and feeling it.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course The key here is that this is someone you don't see often. mention like 10-15 different things you could ask or inquire about that subject. That Subject: "
4) Think of another person and subject. and were really going to ask them about it. And of course the entire time. out loud. If you were going to talk to them for like 30 minutes about that subject.. experiencing it. but with which you are NOT familiar.. who is interested in something that you are NOT familiar with. when you are speaking with a person you do not know hardly at all (yet you feel you will be able to talk to them for 10-15 minutes). like the exercise above. Person: Subject:
Assignments for Parts of a Subject 1) Sometime soon. but with which you are NOT familiar. Now.
. don't know really well.
etc. • If an adventurous.. fun. that is more . they hold back.. Let's break this down. lean more on the language and linking tools to bring it out. they are quiet. This can be VERY powerful. a way of acting or being is being discussed (and one that does not necessarily work in your favor) . o Either in general like "there may be another side" o or more directly. or view. or part of a person." o "You may have (or do have) another part (or side. a "side" to the person. etc" • Discuss this new or other "part" o "With many people. o "When you start to listen to this adventurous side . • If a person is shy.. • What if it is not? What if they say they are shy. in a way you are also using Compare and Contrast as well. and then say (for example).. "parts" are meant as in a personality trait." • If this new or other "side" works more in your favor. adventurous . Let's say you are in a discussion with someone. and they feel that way. • "That's because there is another part... In fact a friend of mine is very shy and one time..
. • Acknowledge the first part that is being discussed. etc.." o "Many people like that also have another side to themselves. more spontaneous side to them. or normally don't "do" certain things? • Then talk about that first (shy) part. if the person is shy o "I understand how some people are shy. "you may have the other side" o or by example "I know someone like that... In many ways... Because you are discussing several things. a way of thinking. A key concept to think about is to ALWAYS assume that there is a part of someone that does agree with you.. what she did . or way of looking at it.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3. (where XYZ is a different or maybe the opposite behavior. or side. we are also reframing! We are changing the way they look at things. Discuss. that part of the person or type of behavior that DOES agree with you)... that adventurous side is just waiting to come out. etc. there is a more decisive. directly or indirectly o For example. In a discussion. You do not want to appear to challenge or invalidate and personality trait that is being shown..." • There will be a lot of this shown in examples here in this section and at the end of the program. or has the same wishes that you do. there is a more quiet side • If a person is well-thought-out (thinks things through and takes time)." • Bring up and acknowledge the fact that there is "another" part. their reactions. another part hidden away. make it be experienced. In this context. or parts. exciting part of a person is being discussed. and I have found she has this other side.6.. if a personality trait. experiencing it. there is a more adventurous part to themselves • If a person is outspoken. great.2
Parts Of A Person
Listen to an example where this concept is used. link it to you. etc. their way of walking through and looking at the world. or reserved. that XYZ part". just looking for the right time. etc)" o "I know someone similar who as this other part to themselves. and start to discuss and validate that OTHER part.. verify it. Don't Confront.
(not good in a person. etc. even when the other person claims or demonstrates that such parts are NOT there. assume there is a part that will work WITH you.)
Exercises for Parts of a Person 1) What if someone says..."
Strategic Formula for Parts of a Person Use Parts of a Person as a way to find. . Traits similar to "Being Boring"
. "I am boring". way of thinking. "you are wrong" or to show how smart you are! You are just talking.
Tactical Formula for Parts of a Person For every part of a person that will work against you. o "Well. There are also other sides to people ... having a conversation. o "I was reading somewhere about things like that and what it was saying was.. You can work around this issue (of possible confrontation) by saying things like o "I think another way of looking at that trait is . it may sound like you are arguing or challenging the person. or part of the person (mostly something which has a negative connotation) Acknowledge that personality trait. o "I have a friend who was "X" (where X is the trait being discussed). that may be true but also there is another part of them . • Maybe someone lies . way of thinking. or part of the person by discussing or addressing it Think about a personality trait... and 3 that are opposite. feelings... and beliefs. that can work in your favor.. or part of the person that is somehow related (which works in your favor) or somewhat opposite.... People have many sides to themselves. This one side ..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
• • •
Many times you don't want to say "because there is another part" because that seems too direct. and she realized that she. and evoke favorable states. Find a personality trait.. was also "Y". • Maybe someone says they can be jealous.. way of thinking. • Maybe someone is secretive. and what I noticed about her is that she also has this other side to her. too confrontational. What personality traits (or what other parts or ways of thinking) are similar? Which are somewhat opposite? Write down 3 that are similar. etc etc etc. you are NOT discussing this as to say. o "A friend of mine does that as well. I understand you have that side to you. deep down. so be careful.. discuss. Remember..
Examples: • Lets say that a person says they are not into taking challenges.. Introduce and discuss that "other part" in a way that works to your advantage. they like to play things safe.. Well. but it can be handled ..
6) Lets say someone says "I am not into meeting any new people right now" . and then bring up this other "part" that you selected.. which could you maybe "use" in a good way? 4) Think about how you would discuss that shy part. pick another part or trait. but this time.. be aware of opportunities to maybe mark off an embedded command or two (or more). What personality traits (or what other parts. Traits similar to "Being Shy"
Traits opposite to "Being Shy"
Of those that you listed. etc.
. and some of the variations mentioned for language examples.. Look at the formula earlier. Now do a similar exercise again out loud. Imagine a conversation and how you might do this. 3) What if someone says that they are shy? What personality traits (or what other parts or ways of thinking) are similar? Which are somewhat opposite? Write down 3 that are similar. 5) From the list you just made (and selected from). maybe do some linking an anchoring. Practice this out loud. Practice this out loud. use this/that/these/those . Look at the formula earlier. and 3 that are opposite.. which could you maybe "use" in a good way? 2) Think about how you would discuss the boring part. and then bring up this other "part" that you selected. or ways of thinking) are similar? Which are somewhat opposite? Think about 1-2 that you could use. Imagine a conversation and how you might do this. and some of the variations mentioned for language examples.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Traits opposite to "Being Boring"
Of those that you listed. Traits similar to "not into meeting any new people"
Traits opposite to "not into meeting any new people"
Practice out loud how you might first discuss "I am not into meeting any new people right now" and then transition into the other parts or traits that you selected.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 7) Do the above example again.
2) After you have become more comfortable noticing such traits after-the-fact. See if what they are saying describes or is pointing out any personality traits (or a "part" of themselves. being open. make note of when you are having a personal conversation with anyone. see if you could maybe think of an opposite one that could be discussed. and then find a way to discuss another part that is more favorable or positive. but ROW see how many of the speaking and language tools you can use. Just notice the trait or part being mentioned.7
OPPORTUNITIES AND CHALLENGES
Listen to an example where I structure opportunities. start to bring them up IN the conversation. WHILE talking to someone. You have probably heard the phrase "structure opportunities. trusting their own judgment.. and offer challenges to you on the audio. and has been a bit difficult for many to really understand
. See if you can note that "part" of who they are. Opposite (or similar?) trait or part that might actually work in your favor
Traits or parts that were discussed. An easy way to do this is when a friend or acquaintance is being self-deprecating in some manner. and then point out some other trait or part that might work in your favor somehow. 8) Lets say someone says they have trouble meeting new people. After the conversation.
3. see if you can notice them WHILE talking to someone. You don't have to discuss them (yet) just make a point to note these traits. 9) Lets say someone says "I only like dating my TYPE"? What other part. Or. and offer challenges" many times when studying these materials. Use the formula and the variations mentioned earlier. See if you can arrive at a similar part or trait that you can discuss that could be used in your favor. or putting him or herself down for some reason. 3) Now that you can recognize these traits when talking to someone. trait. make a note of these traits or parts.? What other part.
Assignments for Parts of a Person 1) For the next week or two. acknowledge it. trait. This area has caused some confusion. or mentions a "way of thinking"). etc could you discuss? Try that out loud. etc could you discuss? Try that out loud.. or parts.
• It's easy. or like to be perceived as having. Universal Wants • Confidence • Maturity • Security • Self-Directed • Intelligence • Control • Excitement
. then by using their existing desires. You then find some way to set things up so that choosing to listen to you. this can be very effective. • Show that you are qualifying and screening to some extent. Why this matters. effect. In this section. is a way for them to show their intelligence. • These are also good and convenient for practicing and examples.1 Using Their Own Processes D7-T36
If you know what people want to have. then they already have mechanisms for that in their mind.
3. or be with you. but may not be the most effective strategy.2
What do people want?
"Universal Wants" = Good. or show it. o This is the opposite of pleading and the "pedestal" scenario. and wants to be seen as intelligent. and that you believe in yourself. but I am looking for more. Work with universal things that people would like to have. these concepts are broken down and offered to you in a way that will truly help you to be able to use these powerful techniques.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
and utilize. Challenge them to demonstrate it. using motivations that a person already has. You are in. • Use these general things and assume they are there. For example if someone is intelligent." • This is NOT about arrogance.7.7. you are using processes that they ALREADY have in their minds. It's good to somehow work with structures and things that are already in someone's mind. you are just showing that YOU have standards. or want to be perceived as having.
Strategic Formula for Opportunities And Challenges Find or assume what someone wants Create an opportunity for them to get it or demonstrate they have it Make that "demonstration" work in your favor. If you can somehow frame or map yourself as being a way for a person to fulfill things that someone already wants. 3. "You may be beautiful. o You are saying in a way. do it. • Show that you have standards.
. along with the Universal Wants listed earlier!
We assume here that with a mini-challenge. or want to be perceived as having? Mini-Challenges D7-T40
3. You are challenging an ASSUMED desire (a "Universal Want").Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
"Particular Wants" = Better! What does THIS person want? • Notice o o o particular things that this individual would like to have or be perceived as having She mentions wanting respect She defends her position... or be seen as having "X".. o You may . o The smart people I know. • Mini-Challenges o You might get this .. and discusses what is important to her She mentions something she likes or dislikes about a past boyfriend..3
There are certain things you can assume that most people may want to have. o You seem cool enough ... o Maybe you can ... Warning .. o You seem as if. o I wonder if you can .. o Talk about what she does. o You seem like . o You seem like you may have good taste o etc. You can imply a "test" for these things by issuing a mini-challenge... etc
Finding these particular wants and desires o These "wants" can be possessions. etc)... or fun.. o You might. o Are you able to .... o You seem smart enough . or want to be perceived as having...... o If you are able to . or adventurous. and it can really annoy people if you do!
. what she likes to do. we are using one of these sort of "universal" wants.7. or maybe a value. o If you can . that's even better.This technique can be overused. wants to have. but if you can find or work with specific wants or desires. What does she want to have... by listening to me or agreeing with me". o You might see . o Always have the question below in mind. and challenging them in a way that says. or an image she wants other people to have of her. o Talk to her and find out what she wants or needs.. can (use smart. Mini-Challenge Cheat Sheet o You seem .. her interests. o Talk about some of yours and see how she reacts. "you can show me that you have the thing you desire.. o etc. o Try using some of the above items.
Opportunities and Challenges
Think of it like this. you will show me you have that". (and again. • Challenge them to see if they will follow through and take action to get it. • Universal Wants • Particular Wants Opportunities.
3. what someone wants. • Find what someone "wants".. • Confidence • Maturity • Security • Self-Directed • Intelligence • Control • Excitement
. here we have to "assume" things for the sake of teaching) .. • Create an opportunity for them to get that • Make it so that them "getting" that works in your favor. by doing "Y" Make "Y" something that works in your favor.
Exercises for Mini-Challenges 1) Try piecing together items from the Universal Wants List.. Challenge the person to do "Y". or been seen as having You can assume based on normal things that people want (Universal Want) or Get information from talking (Particular Want) Create an opportunity for them to get or demonstrate "X". "Show me you have that thing by listening and/or agreeing with me" or.7. and see how many combinations you can come up with. in a way. and Mini-Challenge Cheat Sheet. "By listening to and/or agreeing with me.
What does someone Want? Assume.
Tactical Formula for Opportunities and Challenges Find something "X" that the person wants to have. or be seen as having.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Tactical Formula for Mini Challenges Assume something she wants to have. Make a statement that says. Creating Them Consider the wants and needs that a person may have . or hopefully find..
by meeting this "challenge".. • Mention something that you have read. or some way for this person to capture the opportunity • Provide an example of something she can say or do. • Confidence .. even if their friends don't approve.Think about maturity . • Maybe point out something a friend did . Provide an example of someone. or show what they have. Talk about those things..How can you create an opportunity for someone to appear confident (that works in your favor)? o Discuss people that YOU know. on their own. and see how doing Y would demonstrate it?> • Does she have what it takes to get X.. Maturity . something they want. Examples. Examples: • Does she really want X and see how Y can get that? • Does she really have X. o They can do exciting things. or want to be seen as having Structure this so that it is something that YOU would like them to do.. by doing Y?
. • Here is a way a friend of mine showed that they have or was able to get X.. Challenges Are they ready to take advantage of that (this) opportunity? Challenge them to get what they want.
Provide a way to demonstrate that they DO have what they want. • Provide an example from your own life. o Mention how confident people can meet someone new. and/or HAVING them. o Let the person demonstrate how confident they are. Create the opportunity for them to show or demonstrate that they have or are perceived as having. talk about DOING them.. where this opportunity benefits you (and hopefully pertains to the situation). what does a mature person do? How are they seen? How do they react? o They make their own decisions o They trust their own judgment o They can decide to do something NOW. How can you make that sound like a way for them to "show" something? How to create an opportunity? • Here is a way for you to show me that you really have or was able to get X. o They can go against the grain.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
You need to create an "opportunity" for each of these. o Talk about how confident people can make their own choices.. and how the confident ones are able to take chances and have fun. and feel very comfortable with that. • Here is how I read/heard that someone else had or was able to get X.. o ..
You discuss success for a while... to show or demonstrate that? Examples: • Security o Say she wants to feel secure.. Is she ready to take chances? Take risks? Do something different? Maybe not . you mention "We should get together sometime. Later.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
• • • • • •
Does she want you to THINK she has X. • Challenge them to do that. their own intuition.. but.. what this means to her. I mean.
They want X.
I know this is tricky.. I don't know if you are adventurous enough for this.
.. to be a way for them to get what they want. Assumed Wants
2) Write a Mini Challenge for each if the above items.. there are others shown earlier.
Exercises and Assignments for Opportunities and Challenges 1) Make a list of some assumed things that many people may want to have. Some examples are shown below. she actually felt more secure about being able to take care of herself. Success o Maybe "success" is important to her. It's NOT about creating an argument! Again. Then at some point you talk about you and her getting together." Adventurous o Maybe she wants to feel adventurous. how she may be adventurous. You talk about a friend who has always wanted to feel secure. Are they ready to do Y.. as long as you trust yourself enough to feel that is OK . • Find out what someone wants. and she found that by taking chances and risks. You talk about that for a while. Can she see an opportunity to have "X". and do Y to get it? Can she do Y and make it happen? Can she see that Y will get her what she wants? Can she trust herself enough to do Y? etc. It's different from the way most guys think. she may have to do Y to prove that. then ..". and say something like "well. or be perceived as having.. • Find a way to map what YOU want. and mention that you read somewhere that successful people tend to be able to trust their own judgment. These are your "Assumed Wants".
quite unique.. "lets see if this makes sense to you "see if you can follow this .
5) Think about some people that you know quite well like family... etc. "you might. Person What they want to have." Mini Challenges
3) Practice the list of Mini Challenges you just created. and focus on using these. Note some of your favorites ones below... or wants to be perceived as having. For each person..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course "you seem like . Write down these "Wants". co-workers. friends.. Practice these more. and go out and actually USE them for a while. and NOT just things from the "assumed" list. Hopefully these are specific to them. out loud 4) Make a note of some of the ones you practiced that seem closest to something you could easily say or do with people in your life. "you may . or be perceived as having
. write down something that each wants to have.
Person Opportunity for them to get what they "want" that somehow works in your favor
7) For each "want"..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
6) Consider the "want" that you identified from each of those persons above. Some way that questions . and they spend a LOT of time practicing.
. are they ready? Can they take action? Can they DO this? Write down these "Challenges". and that allows them to be better at their sport. want to do what you wish. What is the opportunity. see if you can create a "challenge". Example . even subconsciously. You are "mapping" it to you because by doing what you discuss. or that in some way could be interpreted. and "opportunity". Is there a way to create an "opportunity" for them to get or achieve that? Can you somehow create an opportunity that can be "mapped" in some way towards yourself. and how can you "map" it to yourself? Write down these "Opportunities". as making them look at you more positively." The "opportunity" is for them to be a better athlete.A friend wants to be really good at a sport. Person Challenge
8) Practice each of those "Challenges" out loud. (You want that friend to lighten up and be able to spend more time going out and having fun. etc? Give that some thought. and write them down.. they will be doing something that YOU want. See if you can make it sound natural.) So you challenge their dedication to their sport by saying "I was reading about really good athletes and one thing that was pointed out was that a lot of them really can get burned out. The good athletes find a way to relax and have fun.
3. This is one area that many guys actually ARE able to pick up and use easily if they have listened to the materials enough. look at how many items we have covered so far. given that this IS an area that many guys are able to do (with enough listening) and given the many OTHER areas that really DO need the assistance of a program like this. • SPEAKING POINTERS o The "Cool" Factor o Voice Tone And Tonality o Pacing And Pausing o Energy And Enthusiasm LANGUAGE TOOLS AND DETAILS o Adjectives And Adverbs o Trance Words o Weasel Phrases o Embedded Commands o Linking o Easy-Linking (This.
3. listen. These. but in another context...8
If you have studied this material for a while. Try to guess. These are those words or phrases that can mean more than one thing. Listen. They may have one meaning in one context. that these become familiar.9 SUMMARY D7-T66
Bringing it together.) o Easy Anchoring .Point Or Touch On Positive And Negative LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES o Pace And Lead " Topics and Subjects * Mindset of Frame • Current Reality o Give Them A Reason
.. we will not be doing any specific work on Ambiguities. they mean something different.. 10) While you are talking to people for the next 1-2 weeks. but also ask some questions and get into a discussion about it if possible. do the same in terms of observing desires. That. so that you have heard them SO MANY TIMES. really focus on what each person desires. Those) MORE TOOLS o Pointing And Gestures o Linking Gestures (Towards And Away) o Easy Linking Expanded (Pointing With This. see if you can bring them up in conversations over the next few weeks. listen. you no doubt have heard many examples of "ambiguities". What do they "want". but now also start to look for "opportunities and challenges" in a way that directs their desires towards you. Although there could be a section in this course that deals with these areas. 11) For the next 1-2 weeks.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
9) As you become more familiar with these practiced challenges and opportunities. to do things that you would want. That. listen. Do what you can to bring these up while in the conversation if you can.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
o o o
Listing • General • At the End • Burying Items More And More Compare And Contrast Parts • Parts of a Subject • Parts of a Person Opportunities And Challenges • Mini Challenges • Opportunities And Challenges Ambiguities
These are the building blocks for good Language skills. These are the sorts of skills that are most workable when they are truly "wired in" to someone, so that they are able to be used automatically. To try to "remember" to do such things can be very difficult. That approach would make having a conversation far too difficult and too much work! The best way is to work with these techniques SO much that these truly are just a part of "how you talk". With enough practice, and hearing these enough, you CAN have these become a part of how. YOU talk! So listen, practice, do the exercises, do the assignments, and do that all again, until these really do become a part of you, and a part of how you speak.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
D8-T1 A key aspect of making these tools work is getting the conversation into topic areas that will really work for you. The language tools you studied earlier are best used in the proper context, and in this section, we will learn how to get the conversation into areas that will create that context. Have you had these problems? • You JUMP too quickly into a pattern or topic, and it sounds really strange? • You just THROW a pattern AT her, and get a weird reaction? When you use these tools, or even use "patterns", it's not enough to just "say it", there has to be the correct CONTEXT for what is said! It's a process that she needs to go on and through with you. It's not enough to just find a conversational excuse to "throw" a pattern (or language tool) AT her! This section is about finding ways to just get into an interesting conversation and then towards and onto good topics. We want this to seem natural, and with some understanding, practice, and a few key strategies and tactics it will BE natural and automatic! 4.1 4.1.1 CHALLENGES -a Detailed And Specific Plans Are Just Not Workable. D8-T3
It's good to theorize to "say this", and then "say that", and then to use "this pattern", and "that pattern". However, the problem is that a lot of time the proper context is not presented well enough. The examples you may have seen in other products are just that, examples. The problem is that too many guys have taken them literally! Guys try to do "X, Y, Z," exactly, in order, with no sense of calibration, or being able to work and re-direct things in real time. Therefore, detailed tactical plans are not realistic. 4.1.2 Navigation Example D8-T4
Think of moving a conversation to a certain point, like taking a trip somewhere. Say you are in Chicago, and want to go to Los Angeles. You could have a detailed map of every turn and road, exact route numbers and lengths, etc. The problem is... what do you do if there is a detour? What if the road is changed, what if the map is wrong? You are lost! What if, instead, we teach you how to drive the car, and give you a general set of directions like "keep driving west, until you see the ocean, then turn left (south)". That way, you can handle just about any turns, roads, or detours that you may encounter! Conversations are different from roads too, because people are all unique, situations, times, surroundings etc. are unique and change from moment to moment. Therefore, if you want to get a conversation to go a certain way, then detailed plans made ahead of time are hard to work with. There are too many variables! We need a workable set of strategies and tactics that allows you, in real-time, to direct things the way that you want them to go. They need to be easy to follow, and easy to use, and something that you don't need to "think about", but can just DO easily.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Navigational Strategies Are Needed
So we need a general set of guidelines, some overall strategies and tactics, so that you can have this good, intuitive sense of how to "steer" things, and get conversations to where you want them to go. As long as you are engaging a woman's emotions, capturing & leading her imagination, then you are moving in the right direction. Then, in that situation and in that context, linking all the positive & powerful things to you becomes more workable. Instead of a map, we are giving you a "compass". We need a strategy for managing conversations that can to do this gradually, in a way that seems natural! If it's too abrupt or makes the conversation strained, it will sound weird. The strategy must LEAD the conversation towards good topics and subjects in a way that seems natural, and is not TOO abrupt. Examples: (Listen to the audio.) • Talking about a printer o Moving TOO quickly towards emotional topics o Can sound strange • Driving a car and taking a turn (Analogy) o Think of driving down freeway and needing to switch to different direction. o You can't make a hard, right angle turn on a dime! o You need to turn the car, slowly, on a ramp to go in a different direction. When we control conversions, we need to find a way to take it gradually in a new direction. Many guys try to do the hard and fast switch, and they crash in the process! We will learn to move things in a way that makes it seem natural, but it will be deliberate. 4.1.4 She Must Be Engaged In The Conversation! D8-T10
It's important to get conversations into the right area and have HER go along with you. Not just "bring it up" (a topic or pattern), but it must be natural and she must "go along" with it and be a PART of it. She must be actually THINKING about what you are discussing! It has to happen naturally. No weird jumps. It's not enough to just talk; she must BE a part of the conversation! So, don't just "jump" to a topic. Don't find an "excuse" to bring it up. Take the conversation there, take her WITH you, and have her be a part of it! What really helps is to have a genuine interest (or at least curiosity) in her and the conversation, not just thinking to yourself; "How can I use this?" 4.2 HOW CONVERSATIONS HAPPEN D8-T12
How does this really occur? We will break this down so that we have a way to really affect this process. 4.2.1 Conversational Dynamics D8-T13
How do conversations happen? Most of them occur somewhat randomly as the conversation flows from topic to topic over time, and can end up almost anywhere after a while. By the time YOU move from one topic to the next,
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
you may end up in a very different place from where you began. However, there is a series of steps as things move forward, as shown in Figure 4.2.1-1.
Figure 4.2.1-1: Conversations Move Through Many Topics
Each of these steps between topics tends to be related. Topic 1 relates to Topic 2. Topic 2 relates to Topic 3, etc. For example, you can start to talk about Cars, and then move to one aspect of that topic, Car Seats. Then it's easy to move to some aspect of that topic, which maybe something that seats are made of, like Leather. Then maybe you talk about Leather Furniture, etc. (See Figure 4.2.1-2.)
Figure 4.2.1-2: Each Topic Flows To the Next Topic In most cases, each Topic is related to the one before.
After a series of such steps, you can be at a quite different topic (like an apartment that you used to live in) even though you started at a quite different topic (Cars). In most cases, it's very difficult to predict where a conversation will go after many of these steps. As you go through a few topic shifts (as shown in the diagrams), although each individual shift relates to the topic before and after that shift, after a series of shifts you can end up talking about almost anything! Therefore, even if you start the conversation at a great topic, you can get off-track and into topics that will not work in your favor. Conversely, what is needed is a way to start at almost any topic at all, and by steering that process (of moving from Topic 1, to Topic 2, Topic 3, etc) take the conversation into better and better topic areas that will serve your purposes. 4.2.2 Conversational Model D8-T14
We introduce a model to assist in discussion, understanding, and control of conversations. If you start at a topic, how do you go to another one? This process happens all of the time very easily. The key is that the movement from one topic to the next takes places easily because there are so many options involved. From any topic (Topic 1) it is easy to flow to any of 6-8 other, related topics (Topic 2 Candidates). People usually just "talk" and naturally the conversation moves from the first topic to the next one. Since the "next" topic is related, this process seems natural and is easy to do. In fact, you do this all the time without really knowing about it. (We are creating a model to describe a process that happens naturally, so that we can teach you a way to have an affect on that process). Figure 4.2.2-1 shows how from one topic, the conversation can flow easily to many related topics.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Car you own Seats in it Interior of your car How Powerful it is What Gas does it use How Fast it is Feel of Driving Places you have gone Where you bought it
Topic 2 Candidates
Figure 4.2.2-1: From One Topic to many Candidate Topics The topic of Cars is discussed, and from there are many ways the conversation can easily move.
Once the conversation moves to one of these eight topics, it's easy to move to one of eight more. For example if in Figure 4.2.2-1, the conversation flows from "Cars" to "Where you bought it" (as in, where you bought the car), then now we have a situation like that shown in Figure 4.2.2-2.
Where you bought it
That car dealer The salesman Part of town Other car dealers Who went with you How you bought it The Loan you used etc. Topic 3 Candidates
Figure 4.2.2-2: From A Second Topic, Another Group of Candidates If "Cars" was discussed first, and then "Where you bought it" was discussed next, there are now many ways to go in the next step. In the figure, you see how the conversation moves from Cars, to "Where you bought it". After that, there are many "candidate" topics where the conversation can flow. Perhaps it moves to the "Part of town" where the car was purchased.
Now from the topic of "Where you bought it" (a car), there are easily eight places that you can go from there, shown as the "Topic 3 candidates". This process continues throughout a conversation. This process happens regardless of the specific topics being discussed. Conversations flow from topic to topic, as shown in a general manner in Figure 4.2.2-3.
With some skill and technique.
In many ways. Do you see why the pre-planned approaches can be difficult?! Even if you ARE able to have the conversation start from a specific place (Topic 1). the plans that many guys try to use to "Talk about X.2-3: Topics Flow from One to the Next Each topic in a conversation can easily lead to 6-8 others. you can affect this process (and we will teach that to you). since it's so easy to go from any topic to 6-8 others.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Figure 4. you can end up with the conversation going almost anywhere! Figure 4.2. the Figures that have been shown so far only show a small portion of the total topics towards which a conversation can flow. you can have up to eight different ways to go at EACH step.2-4 shows what happens when all the topics are considered.2. However. If Topic 1 can lead to eight different candidates for Topic 2. When this happens in succession. there is no way to know exactly where it will end up by the time you have moved forward a few steps! Imagine trying to predict ahead-of-time exactly where you may arrive (among those 512 options). then talk about Z" are very difficult to really work with. because there are SO many ways that things can go!
. and at each step after that. and the conversation flows along in this manner. then talk about Y. when talking to some random person. In general. then EACH of the eight different candidates for Topic 2 can then lead to their own eight. an so on. This results in easily over 500 topics that could be selected by the time we arrive at Topic 4! In only three shifts of the topic ("topic shifts" as shown in the figure) we end up with many many possibilities of where the conversation might end up.
2-4: Topic Candidates and Topic Shifts If each topic can flow to eight others. As seen in the diagram.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
1st Topic Shift
2nd Topic Shift
3rd Topic Shift
Figure 4. then after only three shifts in the topic. It then can flow easily to maybe 6-8 others (the diagram shows fewer for the sake of clarity). Once Topic 2 has been discussed.
.2. it can flow from there. and so on. you can end up in over 500 different topic areas!
We can create a general Conversation Model that shows this process (Figure 4. a conversation may start from one topic or subject (Topic 1).2-5).2.
2-5: Conversation Model The "Tree of Subjects" showing how thousands of subjects can be reached in just a few steps of the conversation. then for that diagram to be really accurate it would have to show over 30.3 Topic Turning Point D8-T15
The KEY concept the needs to be understood to gain the ability to manage conversations. if you assume that from any topic you could go to any of 8 other topics.2.
. The diagram only shows a small fraction of them (so that the diagram is not even more cluttered than it already is!). In fact. (The figure only shows a portion of how many subjects and topics can be reached).3-1.000 different subjects or topics that could be discussed by the time you are at "Level 6" in the conversation!! 4. that they become far too many to shown in the diagram. it is quite easy to move from that onto 6-8 related topics.2.
There are SO many ways it can flow. is an awareness of this phenomenon that is called the "Topic Turning Point". This process of moving from the first topic to one of 6-8 relevant topics is the process of moving through a "Topic Turning Point" as shown in Figure 4.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Figure 4.2. If you are discussing one specific topic.
2. the overall flow of a conversation comes about due to many of these TTP choices being made. Someone might make a comment. after one topic has been discussed for a short while. introduce an idea. the conversation "shifts" slightly. Therefore.3-2
Topic Turning Points
For example.2. The key thing to realize is that this process of Topic Turning Point (TTP) selection occurs over and over.2. and throughout a conversation. make a statement. etc. ask a question.
. the conversation can then move to another topic. However. as long as the new topic is "related" to the first (this is shown in the diagram by the "candidates") then this change is easy to do.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Candidate Topics Figure 4.3-1: The Topic Turning Point (TTP) When discussing any topic (First Topic) there are easily 6-8 different topics to which the conversation can be moved (Candidate Topics). A general way of looking at this process is shown in Figure 4.3-2: How TTP Selections Effect the Conversation The selections made at each TTP are what actually "steer" the conversation in a certain direction.
The overall strategy at the beginning is then to "talk about positive.. and they quick steer the conversation in that manner. Many people do this "TTP selection" process automatically.3. interesting things". and imagine if you had a general way to manipulate these TTPs. As you have probably guessed by now. • Other people direct conversations based upon their own moral or religious values. For example: • Maybe someone always finds a fun. moment-to-moment. This selection just "happens". no matter WHAT is discussed. and some training (which . D8-T16 D8-T16
So how can you actually affect the flow of a conversation.. That ability alone is enough for our purposes. they find a way to point out something negative.. Can you see how you may be able to affect where a conversation goes? You might not be able to predict EXACTLY where it ends up. isn't it? In general. • Other people able to direct conversations based on their own beliefs and their own political motivations as well. fun. choices are made moment to moment. positive way to look at anything. Look in the diagrams. 4.. These people are able to automatically make TTP choices based on a strategy of finding good. fun.3..1-1. we are going to later teach you a way to be able to make these TTP selections. fun. (See Figure 4. to "route" conversations so that they end up being the kinds of conversations that YOU want to have. and do so in a way that sounds VERY natural. • Other people may do the opposite. they somehow see it in terms how in effects their beliefs. with some awareness of this process. No matter WHAT you talk to them about. In a very broad sense. interesting Mundane and uninteresting Negative. positive. is coming soon. Sometimes this can be VERY apparent. The flow of the conversation starts. no one is "deciding" the TTPs. conversations tend to go in one of several ways. and interesting. and that work in YOUR favor. we want to first start to steer things in the best general manner.
So to start our process of learning how to manage conversations. By manipulating TTPs from moment to moment. positive aspects of every topic being discussed.) then you CAN direct how a conversation flows. IMPORTANT: The overall direction of a conversation comes about due to a successive selection of TTPs. These types of people are making TTP selections based on a strategy of finding things that are negative to talk about. very quickly. However. but you will have some control over the overall direction. depressing Confrontational . conversations are one of four types: • • • • Fun. we want the conversation to be positive. easily and naturally? That IS the point.)
..3 4.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Normally. they Good Boring Bad Argument could be more specific (and we will get there).Those are just general examples. and the conversation tend to into one of four general areas. you can direct where the overall conversation goes.1 GENERAL CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Want.
interesting things.1-1: General Conversational Management Consider all of the ways a conversation can go. No matter what is brought up.
How do you do that? • • • Show interest when someone discusses positive. and Interesting". fun. do what you can to steer in that direction. If you break that down into 4 main directions. positive and interesting. Positive. Positive. interesting things.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
General Conversational Management
Conversations tend to flow in one of four major ways.
. you can still "steer" back towards "Fun. interesting things. Even if things move towards other areas. you see that you want to focus the conversation onto topics that are "Fun. fun. Don't engage in conversations when it's NOT about positive. Introduce topics that are fun. and Interesting" things. steer towards Fun. so from the earliest stages.
Figure 4. fun. bring up positive.
Strategic Formula for General Conversational Management To steer the conversation in a good direction.3. Positive. and Interesting topics and subjects.
The overall direction of a conversation comes about due to a successive selection of TTPs.Where can I go that is "fun.2
How To Steer Conversations. By manipulating TTPs from moment to moment.2-1. TTP options. • Etc.
. . and interesting" (See Figure 4.)
Tactical Formula for General Conversational Management Keep thinking .. Moment To Moment
Look at the overall flow of a conversation and break it down to its smallest point that we can affect. and interesting" and just move things in that direction. and then steer things in the correct direction.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
4.2-1: Topic Turning Point Navigation for General Conversational Management No matter what subject you start talking about. You then think of several ways you can go (the related topics. For any subject. and interesting?" Move the conversation in that direction. Positive. and Interesting". you can always think of 6-8 other related topics or subjects.3. move things towards the related topics that are "Fun. and interesting"? Moment-to-moment. How do you move things in that direction? You can: • Ask a question • Make a comment • Make a joke • Quote someone you heard. or something you read. and Interesting? That is the direction to go! Candidate Topics Figure 4. as long as it moves things in a way that answers the question "Where can I go that is fun. So you just think to yourself "Where can I go that is fan. Repeat. you can direct where the overall conversation goes. and then you move things in that direction! Remember . Positive. the topic "candidates" that were shown earlier). you make note of where you are in the conversation. TTP Mantra .3. the TTP.
Which Of these are Fun. positive. positive.3. You think of the "candidates" (the related topics or subjects that you can discuss) that serve you at the time.. positive. as we discussed earlier. positive."Where can I go that is fun.
3 The Model With Strategy And Tactics In Place D8-T23
As you make TTP choice after TTP choice (See Figure 4..3.3. Positive. Positive.3-1: Moving Through Topics Using General Conversational Management Early in a conversation. "fun. the most important thing to do is to focus on moving thing in a direction that is . (See Figure 4.
.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Later in the conversation. 4. you can work more towards certain topic areas. You are steering things towards the direction that you want the conversation to go. but in the early part of the conversation.3.).3-2.)
Keep things moving in the direction of Fun. positive. and interesting".3-1.3. and Interesting!
Figure 4.. just keep thinking about where you can go that is "Fun. and Interesting". Do this for a while. you get to an overall "area" that will work.
Positive.3. or where you are. Positive.3. Even if you temporarily move away from that direction or end up in an area that is not very positive or interesting.3-2: General Conversational Management Model The most important direction to go. is towards Fun. keep steering in the right direction and in many cases you WILL get towards the right area soon enough (and if not. always move towards topics and subjects that are Fun. what was the main topic? Topics
Exercises and Assignments
Exercises for General Conversational Management 1) Think of some conversations that you have been in recently.
4. and Interesting topics and subjects. and Interesting!/
Figure 4.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
General Conversational Mgt Model
No matter where you start. maybe that person is not someone that you want to talk to anyway). and write down the topic for each. At some particular moment early in the conversation. especially early in a conversation.
list 6-8 different ways you could go. consider it a topic that leads to a TTP (copy each item above into the "Topic" area below). ask about. directions you could "take" the conversation (these are the TTP Options. Write each of those down. Topic TTP Options (Candidate Topics')
. or Candidate Topics).Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
2) Based on each of those topics. For each of those Topics. things you could comment on.
etc. asking a question.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3) Of the 6-8 different TTP Options you have written above for each Topic. 5) Practice again on each by moving things in the direction of the second item that was circled. which are the best? Which of these would move the conversation in a way that is best for you (think of "Fun. Positive. making a statement.
.. maybe by making a comment. what would it have been like to have moved the conversation in the direction of the first item you circled? Practice that out loud for each Topic above. 4) For each Topic. and Interesting")? Select two "candidates" and circle or highlight those two. whatever it might take to move things in that direction.
they will not go down a path of having a fun. don't worry. Positive. After a while. By manipulating TTPs from moment to moment. You then have to wonder . Interesting. you can direct where the overall conversation goes. Building on what we learned in the last section. we can start to direct the conversation into an even BETTER area. When talking to anyone. we want to work with topics that get the emotions involved.1 ADVANCED CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Really Want. If this is a challenge for you.5
Remember what was said earlier: • The overall direction of a conversation comes about due to a successive selection of TTPs (which normally occur at random. positive and interesting topics. that no matter WHAT you do with some people. We want to focus the aim of our conversational management skills even more. really be aware of the TTP opportunities in your day-to-day life. thinking "what COULD I have done. inquire about something. 2) Now that you are able to quickly find 1 or 2 good TTP options. we want things to get even more
. You may start to find however. make a comment."
4. we want it to be really interesting. even at the start of a conversation. whatever it takes. look for moments where things can be "steered" in a certain way. engaging. the conversation becomes more enjoyable for everyone. where COULD I have taken things". At any moment you should be able to think "Where can I go with this?". positive.Is that the sort of person you want to talk to and spend time with? Maybe not. the imagination moving. Do this for a while until the process of finding 1 or 2 good "Ways to go" in a conversation (good TTP options) can happen very rapidly for you.4. having conversations with. fascinating. D8-T33 D8-T33
We want the conversation to be more than just positive. you may have to think of 6-8 options. It WILL get easier. interesting.
By moving things in this way. start to take the conversation there! Ask a question. Instead of the more general area of fun. interesting. Maybe start out by looking at conversation after the fact.3. and spending time with? The type of guy that people seek out to spend time with? The more you do these types of exercises. maybe offer an opinion. Make it so that it becomes easy for you to come up with a list of "options" very quickly. we are turning you into someone that people LIKE to talk to! You know the type of person that people enjoy talking to. Just do what you can so that the TTP shifts in a direction that is fun. or without an overall strategy in mind). In general. but the REAL key is to at least get to the point where you can very quickly think of at least 1 or 2 ways to go that are Fun. At first.4 4. the more YOU can and will become that guy! 4. and positive conversation. etc. and people REALLY interested.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Assignments for General Conversational Management 1) For the next week or so.
General Conversational Management takes the conversation into the Fun. to "steer" things even more towards what we want. and steer using Advanced Conversational Management
From there. Now from that point.4. you move it in ways that engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way.4. we were able to move things in the direction of Fun. So. Interesting area.
With that as a general strategy. steer the conversation towards directions that engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way. We move forward and want to get a more emotional tone. Positive. Using General Conversational Management. and more involvement of the imagination. there were 4 main directions towards which a conversation may go. there are many ways to go.1-1: Advanced Conversational Management Focuses the Steering From the start of a conversation. We use our strategy of working with the TTPs. more excitement. To move the conversation into more interesting areas. how do we work that in what we are doing moment-to-moment? How can we do things that will make that happen?
. (See Figure 4.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
interesting. there are many ways the conversation can move.
Strategic Formula for Advanced Conversational Management To direct the conversation into even BETTER areas.1-1. we now shift our strategy of "steering" things to direct the topics in a more focused manner using Advanced Conversational Management. and Interesting.
So we narrow our focus.
Repeat.Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner? Move the conversation in that direction. See Figure 4. and Interesting" area.4. With that established. 4.3 The Model With Advanced Strategy And Tactics In Place D8-T38
(Before we move on to looking at the model.4.
TTP Fun.2 Steering Conversations Moment To Moment using Advanced Conversational Management D8-T35
Again. we look at the concept of the TTP. Interesting Topics
Which of these "Engage the Emotions and imagination in a Positive Way"? That is the direction to go!
Figure 4.2-1. we can assume that we are talking about subjects which fit into the "Fun. Positive. (See Figure 4. we need to change the way the model is shown.4. we shift the focus of how we navigate TTPs. we need to use the TTP as a way to move things in the right direction. and explain a bit more as to its meaning and interpretation. and with that strategy in mind. Positive.4.4.2-1: Topic Turning Point Navigation for Advanced Conversational Management After using General Conversational Management for a while.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 4. but now think "where can I go that will engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way".)
.) TTP Mantra " Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner?
Tactical Formula for Advanced Conversational Management Keep thinking .3-1 for an explanation.
) the conversation moves on for a while. these diagrams will indicate a VERY condensed version of the number of steps involved.
. and Interesting conversation (2) may take four steps. with thousands upon thousands of possible possible routes and outcomes. For example. the graphics we will use will show an even more "condensed" version of this process.3-1: Understanding the Conversational Management Model The "levels" shown in the models are not meant to be exact. When starting from ANY topic (1) to a place where you are firmly established for a period of time in a Fun. so that the various stages of a conversation can be easily illustrated. In practice. The locations of points (1). Positive. once again ending up with thousands of topics that could be discussed by the time you get through more topic shifts (3). etc. where every "step" (TTP. It may happen in ten minutes. or topic shift) shown on the digram may represent many steps in an actual conversation. it may take ten. This can result in so many possibilities (many thousands within a few steps) that it's important to look at these diagrams as a way to show "trend". but a way to show a "trend". not an exact number of steps or outcomes. there can be a whole "tree" of possibilities leading from there. and it ends up at a certain area (2). From now on in the course.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Understanding the Conversational Management Model
The model attempts to show a process that has many many steps. Positive. we are not showing that there are exactly "four steps" between points (1) and (2).4. the model above is what we used to show a starting point (1).
Figure 4. At that point. (2). For example. But after using the general techniques (Fun. and (3) in the figure above (and in the next figure) helps to show this. or thirty.
subjects. in practice it may be good to follow a series of topics for 5. After that has been established. emotional topics. the conversation will get more and more of an "emotional" tone to it.4.4. and states. Although the diagram shows only 2 steps (for simplicity).
. This is shown from point (1) to point (2) in the diagram.3-2: Advanced Conversational Management Model Early in the conversation. Then a shift is made towards focusing the conversation even more using Advanced Conversational Management. This also is followed for a series of steps and a period of time. are used together to move forward in a conversation. For a while. if you use the language tools which we learned about earlier in the course. and then Advanced Conversational Management. If you refer to Figure 4. until it is firmly established that the conversation has engaged the emotions and imagination of the participant. you can see how General Conversational Management. This is shown between points (2) and (3). This too can take any number of steps. General Conversational Management techniques are used. The subjects will get more and more fascinating. feelings. and Interesting conversation (2). or however long it takes to be firmly established in a Fun. Positive. 20. only a few of which are shown in the diagram. or 30 minutes. exciting. to yourself!
Advanced Conversational Management Model
Figure 4. we focused the conversation towards moving things in a direction that is "Fun Positive and Interesting. And of course while doing that. we now focus more on moving in a direction that will "Engage the Emotions and Imagination in a Positive Way". the conversation will get better and better. and could be at any of thousands of topics after 6. 8. 10.3-2. 10 topic shifts. If you follow these two simple strategies together (and the tactical approach of simply watching the TTPs and moving things in the right way). As time goes on. you end up linking and associating many fascinating.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
We started at one topic. Now the emphasis is on ways to "Engage the Emotions and Imagination in a Positive Way".
For each of those Topics. consider it a topic that leads to a TTP (copy each above into the "Topic" areas below). or Candidate Topics). things you could comment on. what was the main topic? Topics
2) Based on each of those topics.4
Exercises and Assignments
Exercises for Advanced Conversational Management 1) Think of some conversations that you have been in recently. positive.4. At some particular moment in that conversation. Topic a. directions you could "take" the conversation (these are the TTP Options. TTP Options (Candidate Topics')
. These should be conversations where it is already obvious that it is a fun. Write each of those down. and interesting conversation. ask about. list 6-8 different ways you could go.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
4. and write down the topic for each.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
don't worry. whatever it takes.. Do this for a while. start to take the conversation there! Ask a question.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3) Of the 6-8 different TTP Options you have written above for each Topic. what would it have been like to have moved the conversation in the direction of the first item you circled? Practice that out loud for each Topic above. fascinating.4. It WILL get easier. This is best when applied to a conversation that is ALREADY fun. positive. making a statement. you may have to think of 6-8 options. we are "steering" things more and more in a direction that we wish to go. even things with some degree of sensual connotation to them.
Assignments for Advanced Conversational Management 1) For the next week or so. seductive things. So.
D8-T46 D8-T47 D8-T47
As you can see. If this is a challenge for you. maybe by making a comment. really be aware of the TTP opportunities in your day-to-day life. etc. until the process of finding 1 or 2 ways to go that "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way" in a conversation can happen very rapidly for you. whatever it might take to move things in that direction. we want to steer things more towards romantic. but be especially aware of wanting to move things to "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way".
4) For each Topic.. So.
4. maybe offer an opinion. thinking "what COULD I have done. At first.5 4.5. but the REAL key is to at least get to the point where you can very quickly think of at least 1 or 2 ways to go that "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way".
5) Practice again on each by moving things in the direction of the second item that was circled. make a comment. Maybe start out by looking at conversation after the fact. and interesting. what next? At some point in the conversation. we focus further on the TTP options!
. where COULD I have taken things". inquire about something.5 4. which 1 or 2 would tend to "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way"? Which ones move things in a way that is best for you? Select two "candidates" and circle or highlight these two. 2) Now that you are able to quickly find 1 or 2 good TTP options for yourself that "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way". once again. Just do what you can so that the TTP shifts in a direction that can "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way".1
Summary MORE ADVANCED CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT More About Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Really Want.. asking a question.
The focus now is upon topics that get you closer towards Romantic.5.) "Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic. This gets her mind into thinking more and more about these things. seductive things?"
Figure 4.2-1.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Strategic Formula for More Advanced Conversational Management To further direct the conversation into even BETTER areas. and seductive things. Fascinating.5. positive and interesting thing.2
Steering Conversations Using More Advanced Conversational Management
TTP Mantra (See Figure 4.5.
This may seem odd or hard to do. Moving towards romantic. fascinating.3 The Model With More Advanced Strategy And Tactics In Place D8-T52
We are just closing in. steer the conversation towards romantic.
4.5. However. seductive things?" Move the conversation in that direction. and focusing more and more towards areas and topics that work. fascinating. Seductive things
Tactical Formula for More Advanced Conversational Management Keep thinking . you will have taken things in the right direction and this will be much easier.3-1."Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic. Repeat. and followed the other strategies and tactics shown earlier.2-1: Topic Turning Point Navigation for More Advanced Conversational Management After using General and Advanced Conversational Management. and then topics that engage the emotions and imagination. fascinating. then the focus shifts again towards directing things in a specific way.5. and associating YOU with them! (See Figure 4. fascinating. seductive things is much easier after you have first move towards fun. 4. if you have been in a conversation for a while.)
moving to point (4)
. Early on. shown from point (1) to (2). Then the Advanced Conversational Management Techniques place the focus more upon items that involve the Emotions and Imagination in a Positive Way.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
More Advanced Conversational Management Model
Figure 4. After that type of conversation has been established (3).. there is a different focus at each stage. which targets topics and subjects that are Romantic. Positive. and Seductive. General Conversational Management techniques place the focus on selecting items that are Fun.5. moving to point (3). the focus moves towards selecting items based on More Advanced Conversational Management. Fascinating. and Interesting.3-1: More Advanced Conversational Management Model As the conversation progresses.
6.6.MAGIC! However that is NOT the way it works in the real world. and then . (See Figure 4. to a positive one. the way it really DOES happen.6
Using these Conversational Management skills in the real world may be quite different in practice from the way most guys "think" it will happen. Too many guys are too caught up in this one-shot dream of traveling once across the model and getting an amazing result.)
The Dream that Does Not Happen!
. will work in your favor. This hardly ever ever happens. then a sensual one.1-1: The Dream of a 1-Shot Path To Success! A common misperception is that many guys think that if they can just move a conversation from the start. Moreover.1 The 1-Shot Beeline Fallacy D9-T2
Guys assume that they will travel from a general topic.1-1. and then an emotional one. that they will get an AMAZING reaction in their first movement across the Model.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
4.6. and get things to be more and more fascinating and exciting. 4.
Because no matter where you start from. you take a conversation from the early stages through the process. Maybe you move all the way back to a very "normal" topic (which would be all the way on the left side of the model). In this way. e) Then move back (towards the left side of the model) This may happen because: • The person you are talking to does that (she asks a question) • Or maybe you do it (just to lighten things up) f) Then start again. you back off. (See Figure 4. using the Conversational Management techniques Get as far through the model as you can.. When we say "go back".. no matter how the conversation jumps around. So. You just start the process again.6. Maybe you start from a very general topic and get all the way through the model towards a very very fascinating topic or subject. you may jump back just several steps in our Conversational Management Process... Of if you can't seem to get to a good place. And again. Have fun. The conversation starts.. Just start the process again..31. starts. No problem. and then . stay there and talk about it for a while. You might do that on your own. or maybe the conversation shifts back to that place due to something she says. emotional and imaginative topics. Then at some point.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
4. Then you "back up" to some extent (even all the way back to a very general topic area) and then move forward across the model again. Use the language tools. If you get to a very good place. here is how this works. the conversation ends up being very interesting and fascinating! 4. This is where a process is done repeatedly over and over.. and fascinating and seductive topics.) a) b) c) d)
. No problem. moving through the model towards the right.6. Maybe several times. and then at some point.2
How Fractionation Works
The real world has stops. etc. So. move on to the next step. no matter where you start..6.3 Using Conversational Fractionation D9-T5
Start at some normal topic and move through the model towards the right. restarts. you are always moving towards positive topics. This actually works better! We are actually using Fractionation. g) Do the whole process over and over. you go back towards something more "normal".. This actually ADDS to the power and effectiveness of what you are doing. Great! Talk about that for a while. You back up to a more general topic. goes for some distance through the model (maybe all the way through).. Start at any topic (you are on the far left side of the Model) Move forward towards the right.
it's not a bad idea to back up a bit (9) and then move forward again.6. at times maybe they move towards an area that is not too good (2). and fascinating! 4. Fractionation happens at times because even when you may be at a fairly good place for a while (8). As time goes on (5-12) the conversation gets into better and better areas. The overall trend is that.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Conversational Fractionation at Work
Figure 4.3-1: How Conversation Fractionation Works on the Model Follow the conversation as it moves from (1) to (12). that no matter WHAT you talk about. it ends up being fun. This is not a problem. simply back up (3) and then try moving into a better direction (4). over time. interesting. there is a continued movement up and into better and better areas of conversation. there is no such thing as a conversational "Dead End"!
. As things move forward from (1). You become one of those fascinating guys.6.4 Dead Ends Come Back To Life! D9-T6
With this new strategy of using Conversational Fractionation.
Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner? Move things in that direction... or what you both have in common Move forward with the Strategies and Tactics in mind.. have more material to use in conversations in the future! 4. you just back up.7 CONVERSATIONAL OVERVIEW AND REVIEW D9-T7
So. Just back up. fascinating. and use the Strategy and Tactics of the Conversational Management techniques! Look at "Dead Ends" as being just like a bad turn on a road. and the person becomes interested and fascinated. Where can I go that is fun..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
If you happen to take a "wrong turn" somehow and get into an area of discussion that is boring. or maybe negative. etc. you might have just found out that they are NOT someone you want to spend time with! That's not a total loss because you STILL learned more. and get the effect. Do that for a while and then think . talked more.3 Summary D9-T10
Go have fun with these tools!
. o If you get to a good subject or topic.7.. how do we pull this together? 4. seductive things? Move things in that direction.7. Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic. Do that for a while and then think . uninteresting. o Comment on what is around o Mention common items.1 • Conversational Management Approach Start on just about ANY subject. and interesting? Move things in that direction. use the language tools as much as possible! D9-T8
• • • • • • • •
Keep moving the conversation into these interesting fascinating areas .. (think of your TTP options).2 What If The Outcome Is Not What You Expected? D9-T9
Despite your best efforts..7. use the language tools... positive. this can happen. stay there for a while. and go down another path! 4. back up a few steps. —* The entire time: o If you hit a "dead end". with you! 4. • What if you can't make the conversation positive? • What if she always points out the negative aspect? • What if there is NO emotional engagement at ALL? Well. When on good topics. No problem.
fun. you should be able to use them with subjects in which you are already interested!
. fascinating. the easier it will get. the more you talk to people about such things. The more experience you get.1 Themes are a way through a discussion or through the "tree of subjects" that we showed earlier. and that statement (regarding having actually talked to someone about the topics) will be TRUE! So. and THEY said. go ahead and practice! (Or maybe do that the next time you go through the course.. What do you talk about? There is no substitute for experience. Most men may not be very familiar with many of the topics that we REALLY want to get into.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
5. this is something we can and will work on with you.0
D9-T11 What do you talk about? As the conversation gets more interesting. especially as they get more interesting. In the meantime. fascinating.great! It's easier to use the language tools if you are discussing topics with which you are familiar. Themes vs. and it's even better if you are passionate about those topics. TOPICS OF ENTHUSIASM AND PASSION D9-T14
What are you passionate about? Few things are more compelling in a person than for them to be passionate about something (hopefully many things) in life. and then the more "material" you will have. You want to be able to discuss these topics easily. However.". if using those language tools is problem for you. so that YOU have some material. we have talked about managing conversations. Now we want you to become familiar with topics that will really work well for you! We are going to work with some of these topics. and some familiarity with this type of thing.) Before you can use the language tools with new subjects that you are learning about. the more familiar you will be with these topics. Can you talk passionately about something? Anything? Hopefully. You will be able to say things like "I was talking to someone about this the other day. and while talking about subjects and topics that YOU are really passionate about. what can we do here in this course to help you? We have talked about the way to talk and use language.. Talking about these topics may be a challenge for many men. yes! How well can you talk about topics that YOU are passionate about while using many of the language tools we talked about in the earlier parts of the course? If you can do that very well . to get the best effect you will have to be a PART of that conversation and familiar with the topics that may come up. A topic is a particular area of discussion that is taking place in a moment. Topics • • 5. some practice. However. then you may want to go back in those earlier sections. and closer towards the subjects that will really serve your intent.
You want to be able to discuss topics that deal on some level with Seduction.. or sports.2 SEDUCTION ORIENTED TOPICS D9-T15
In the context of this course (and your intent in talking with . Seduction Oriented Topics (SOTs) . in the right way Use the language tools!
You want to be familiar with these topics (SOTs) and able to discuss them easily: maybe not ALL of them. or the office. but how effective are those as subjects given the "purpose" of the discussion? You want to discuss topics and things which deal with seduction. excitement. You may talk about cars. or. at least. in some ways. (Every guy has his favorites and ones that work best for him. or topics that are very close to that concept. How good are you at the earlier sections that dealt with the language tools? It may be a good idea to go back over those sections. but a good number of them..)
.Topics that bring up images and thoughts that are romantic. Examples of SOTs • Connections • Going for it • Making good decisions • Surrendering to feelings • Getting excited • Feeling excited • Trusting your judgment • Taking chances • Indulgence • Maturity • Good decisions • .. and seductive. work it. stay there as long as you can! Talk about it. SOTs are the "end goals" when it comes to managing or directing a conversation. someone) some topics are easier to work with than others. and link it to you! When • • • • • you are at or near an SOT: Use the correct tone of Voice Pace and Lead correctly Link things to you Point at the right times. These are called "Seduction Oriented Topics". sensual. etc..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
So. or near. judge for yourself. feelings. and emphasize discussing topics in which YOU are interested and passionate about. 5. a topic that is an SOT.. Topics that access emotions. The conversational management sections will help you to move the conversation in a way that will get you near these topics areas. but doing so while using the language tools. or cleaning the toilet.just TALKING about these can create a good effect. can create an AMAZING effect! When you do get a conversation into an area near an SOT. Your point is to get to..
using as many of the language tools as you can.
Exercises for Seduction Oriented Topics 1) Build your own list of SOTs. or on TV.Are you able to somehow relate to these in your own life? Maybe something you read or heard? Maybe questions you can ask? ANYTHING?!?!? You do not need to "know" a lot about these topics or be an expert.
Assignments for Seduction Oriented Topics 1) Pay attention to conversations in your life (even things you hear on the radio. or even watched in a movie! (Or heard in a course that you took . Get the conversation there. ask about them. easily. the more you work with the materials. talk about something you heard. and the more you talk to and with people about them.. Think of SOME way to discuss these. and discuss these subjects.. Think about other topics you have heard mentioned in this program. but the more you think about them. and also topics that you have heard in other materials and products that you have.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
These topics may seem foreign to you. Eventually. hopefully some way that involves you and your own life.
. or in movies. or seduction per se. or anything like that. Meaning. Or are taking!) . you JUST need to be able to talk. read. use as many of the language tools as you can. bring up images and thoughts that may work for you. and without "thinking" about the language tools. You can use some of those that were listed earlier if you wish. the easier it will be to "riff" on these using the language tools. keep it there. have stories about them. or overhear from others) and listen for when any of these SOTs come up in conversation. Or. or joke about them. you will be able to just "talk" about the subject while using the tools that are available. and hopefully add some of your own. the more you practice. by there very nature. or comment on them! Talk aloud for several minutes about each. and while there. Don't worry about talking to women. 3) Practice talking about each aloud. or ask questions. the more you practice using the tools. the easier it will get!
Strategic Formula for Seduction Oriented Topics SOTs are topics that. Seduction Oriented Topics
2) You must become familiar with these! You must be able to talk about them.. Write down your list of SOTs.
The more you hear. it gets easier to enter into more conversations that deal with these topics. and move through these exercises and assignments. this process must start somewhere. after having worked with hundreds of guys. You do a few exercises to talk about them.SOTXs D9-T24
What if you had not just 10 ways of discussing "Seduction Oriented" subjects.
. That is understandable. Maybe ask some questions about things that deal with your SOTs. Use as many of the language tools as you can.. Many guys who can now talk about these things VERY easily and comfortably started from a place of having NO idea of what to say! They changed. then the more material YOU will have to talk about. discuss.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Listen to what is being said. make a comment. "the other day I heard someone talking about. You start to listen and take notice of when these are discussed. ask an opinion. You listen more to when they are discussed. 2) Now . this is one of the key challenges that many guys face. anything at all! Talk. quote. it WILL get easier.Talk about these subjects and topics! Make a point to enter into a discussion when one of your SOTs is mentioned. but as long as you start it. or even when anything CLOSE to one of your SOTs is discussed. ask what something means. but we are walking you through (at least the first steps of) the process to make this easier: • • • • • • • • • • • You have made a list of SOTs. and frankly. However."). 5. I can tell you that it DOES get easier and easier to be able to talk about these things. etc.. show interest. or even just TRY to do so.3 EXPANDED SEDUCTION ORIENTED TOPICS . (As in. Then you get to hear MORE people talk about them. That makes you really think about them. That gives YOU more familiarity with discussing them. We learned how you can move from any topic. what is said. That's what we want to do here. So can you. Really! Learning to discuss such things may start out slowly. It may start a bit slowly and awkwardly. and easily come up with 6-8 related topics. and makes it easier for you to talk about them. These are called Expanded SOTs (SOTXs). the more you listen. Make special note of topics that are CLOSE or similar to these SOTs in some way. Because of that. what people think. However.
See? We are working on a process to get you to become more comfortable and familiar with these things.
SOT Summary I KNOW that these topics may seem foreign to you. And that gives you MORE material to talk about! Which make it easier for you to enter into more conversations about these subjects and topics. They did it.. ask. but had even more? Maybe 50? What if that was easy and familiar for you? Think back to how we looked at topics earlier. and start to get your brain working on them. They started and became more and more familiar with these topics. but this time with SOTs.
For any given SOT.with family .
...with friends .... can you think of different aspects of that? Parts of Connections? Questions about Connections? Ways of experiencing Connections? People or things with which you can experience Connections? By asking those types of questions (to yourself). (You do not really need to list "connections with" for each.. there are many different types or examples of connecting to people.with someone you just met . how easy would it be to talk about how you CONNECT with those? And if you talk about
.. Then..with someone while on vacation ..with coworkers . etc. places.. They think of only one way of talking about that subject. Instead of worrying about getting to that one topic (SOT) in a certain way.with pets .. see Figure 5. (Does that diagram look familiar?)
If "Connections" is an SOT. or only one aspect of that to discuss (connections in a romantic or sensual context). you now have 6-8 ways to discuss it. how we discussed a Topic Turning Point?) If Connections is a particular subject.with your teammates
Figure 5. you can talk about that for while. you can take any SOT..with a girlfriend .with music . Look at the list above. pets. and build a whole list of very similar things to talk about -which are SOTXs! For example... However as we see here.. comes up in a conversation.3-1. and things that can be discussed. SOT Connections SOTX Connections with family Connections with friends Connections with coworkers Connections with pets Connections with a girlfriend Connections with someone you just met Connections with someone while on vacation Connections with music Connections with your teammates
Many guys worry about talking about something like "Connections". That just makes it easier for our example below). it's easy to think of several different aspects of that topic or related topics. family... if friends. coworkers. the SOTX list consists of all of these items shown in the diagram and listed below. but can you think of 6-8 different aspects of this? (Remember what we did in the earlier sections.3-1: How SOTs are related to an SOTXs.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Expanding on a Topic Area "Connections" is an SOT. That is one subject.
This is your SOTX list. c. that you just met! When you expand SOTs in this way.3-2: SOTXs Can Lead Into SOTs If any of the topics in the SOTX list comes up in conversation..to . point out an example regarding pets. a.. how to connect with people.. it's very easy to then shift. and how you (or someone else) can connect with a pet. you can be as close as one step away from an SOT. ask a question. or different aspects of that topic. or maybe even someone.) and for each SOT.. or how that topic can be experienced. then you can shift to talking about "how you can connect with a pet" fairly easily. Just make a comment.)
Family Friends Coworkers Pets Connections A girlfriend Someone you just met Someone met on vacation Music Teammates Figure 5. etc. or a special person.. you are to list 5 (at least) related topics. If you talk about that for a while. SOTs " SOTXs List
. (Yes. if someone is talking about pets.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
THAT (how you connect in that manner) for a while. then you can shift towards ANOTHER type of "connection" very easily! (See Figure 5. b. this is a TTP diagram in reverse!)
For example.3-2.. all of a sudden there are many MORE ways to get to these really GREAT topics!
Exercises f o r Expanded Seduction Oriented T o p i c s 1) Take the SOT list you had earlier (copy those down into the first column below.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
2) Now for each SOTX. (Like the earlier example. That gives you a LOT of flexibility in conversations!
Step back and look at what you have done! You have 10 SOTs with which YOU are familiar. and see if you can then focus what you are saying towards the SOT itself. Talk about that SOTX for a moment or two. practice talking about it out loud.)
3) Do the same thing again. then about connecting in general. you talk about pets. You have 50 SOTXs that you are now familiar with as well. but now do so while using the language tools. then about connecting with pets.
.with coworkers . 5.with pets Connections .. especially politicians and activists. In addition. However. the easier it will be to notice SOTXs.4 CONVERSATIONAL MODEL WITH SOTXs. but it IS related to an SOT that I have worked with". or anything like them mentioned. The more you work with this. SOTXs are now like "conversational landmarks" for you in terms of navigating a conversation. if you hear any of them mentioned.. concept of "topics related to a topic" in many many places. The more familiar you are with these subjects. "I didn't list that SOTX... You will start to notice this. You may think... you know that you are very close to getting near a subject area that will work very well for you. It ALL gets easier! 2) Start to "direct" the conversations you encounter where your SOTXs are mentioned.with a girlfriend . and move the conversation towards SOTs. If anything like an SOTX comes up in a conversation. The real usefulness of this is when you reverse the order as shown in Figure 5. spotting these opportunities get easier and easier. modeled the process arid the steps involved. use such techniques a LOT. that process can work both ways.with friends ... and then built upon that step by step.with music . it's about getting YOU comfortable and familiar with these topics..
.with someone while on vacation .with family . See if you can move the conversation a bit towards the SOT itself..4-1: SOTXs Are The Pathways To SOTs
SOTXs are an easy way to get towards SOTs.. We have broken these down. Maybe you will even start to notice SOTXs that were not even ON your list..with someone you just met . it is easy to then move the conversation towards topics that will work better for you (SOTs). The techniques that you have learned are the sort of things that many people do naturally.
Summary You now have MORE material to work with than you ever thought possible! This is not about memorizing.with your teammates Family Friends Coworkers Pets A girlfriend Someone you just met Someone met on vacation Music Teammates Connections
This is how we developed SOTXs
This is the most useful way of thinking of SOTXs Figure 5. use the language tools if and whenever you can.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Assignments for Expanded Seduction Oriented Topics 1) Look at all of your SOTXs! That's a LOT of subjects! Pay attention in your life to see how often any of those items come up in conversation (or maybe you just hear them somewhere)... D9-T32
We discussed how to develop an SOTX list from an SOT.4-1.. Good speakers... broke it into bits and pieces that you can learn and do as exercises.
However in the figure above. you have practiced with so many of these SOTXs. to be able to notice when you are talking about things which are "close to" topics that will work well for you. you have started to train yourself to "recognize" these landmarks.without "thinking" about them. we can then show them as part of our Conversational Model.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
So whenever you are having a conversation.
. and done the exercises and assignments. and anything like an SOTX comes up in the discussion. and then towards SOTs.. As the topics get better and better.the number that YOU have actually worked with so far!
Since SOTXs and SOTs are the "goals" in terms of managing a conversation. After all. we have had to compress or simplify them quite a bit and show only a fraction of the actual steps and numbers involved so that the diagrams do not become too large or complex. If you have followed the program. and 50 SOTXs (in the earlier exercises) you now have many many SOTXs with which YOU are familiar! More importantly. this will start to happen for you. In many of the diagrams. you have already worked with 10 SOTs and 50 SOTXs as shown in Figure 5.4-2.
Figure 5. that is not an abbreviation or exaggeration. It's to have you practice and become familiar with them. you now see how easy it can be to move over to an SOT! In fact. or the SOTXs. and for you to just start to "recognize" these things on your own .4-3 shows this in the model itself. you will get closer and closer to SOTXs. that this process will now be easier than you may have imagined. Figure 5. The point here (again) is not to memorize the SOTs. there are really 50 SOTXs and 10 SOTs shown .4-2: Your Multiple Pathways to SOTs! Now that you have worked with 10 SOTs.
you start to "listen" for topics that are SOTXs. and ANY TOPIC. Stay there for a while if you can!
Figure 5. you can start from just about ANY topic and get to GREAT topics! It's easy. When you get to an SOTx. just follow the steps listed earlier in the Conversational Management sections. SOTXs are a pathway to make that easier.. which are topics near or related to seduction (a step or two away from SOTs). and using this type of approach you will have fascinating conversations with people that lead to where YOU want to go! (See Figure 5. You can start from almost ANYWHERE. and topics that are close to that (SOTXs). or as close as you can towards SOTs. or anything that is "related" to an SOT.
Move towards SOTs.)
. then start to pay attention for SOTXs.
Listen for SOTXs Anything near or related to an SOT.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
SOTs in the Conversational Management Model
The end goal is to get to.5-1.
5. then you can simply move things towards a topic that is very seduction-oriented! The point is not to have a "list" in mind.4-3: SOTs Are THE Goals in Conversational Management As you move through a conversation.5
THE COMPLETE CONVERSATIONAL MODEL
Start from any topic and get to where you want! Yes. Period. it's that you have trained yourself to recognize things that are SOTs. Then move the conversation towards an SOT! This works.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Figure 5.5-1: The Complete Conversational Management Model (continued on next page)
or SOTX... interesting .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Figure 5.Fun. or very close!
. fascinating.. exciting. Fractionate If you take a wrong turn.Romantic. and see how easy it is to get to some good topic that is an SOT. seductive things Direct the Conversation Pay attention when Good Subjects come up (SOTXs) Listen for anything a step or two away from an SOT Move towards SOTs Stay there as long as you can Use The Language Tools! As much as possible.Engaging the emotions and imagination in a positive way . Steer towards .. Especially when at or near SOTXs and SOTs. Steer towards .. back up! If you move back to a general topic.. start over!
Assignment! 1) Try it! Start directing conversations using the conversational management model.5-1: The Complete Conversational Management Model (continued) Start a Conversation Manage the Conversation Move the Conversation in a Good Direction Steer towards .
Link and associate these feelings to you. Present a Call to action. Its just a "type" of talking that you can (and will be able to) use when you feel it is appropriate. and being aware of when you DO get to an area of conversation that does allow you to use a pattern. With this new approach to learning and using these tools. A representative sample.Many of the details of driving a car are things you just "do". or "how can I bring up a pattern that I know". You practice bits and pieces of the sport.0
6. and as "a way of speaking". It's best to just think of patterns as examples.
The Pattern Formula in detail. the clutch. "A plan" or "model". diagram. Use the language tools. • While talking to a woman. etc. The navigation is handled through our use of Conversational Management techniques. Don't think of "how can I get to the pattern". Examples/Analogies: • Sports . or series of actions. Once you actually play the game though. clarifying.You don't play the entire game ahead of time. • An example of what you can say. or "how can I bring this pattern up". • Driving . "how can I get to my pattern". She may take the conversation into better places that you could have predicted. You don't have to think about moving the wheel. • Instead. get her to "experience" good feelings and states o Use the Conversational Management Techniques to get there o Get her to think about good and/or exciting feelings
. • Maybe talk to a woman and allow HER to bring up things that end up working well in pattern-like language. or could say. think about having a conversation (and managing it correctly).1
PATTERN OVERVIEW D10-T1
What is a pattern? • A plan. asking.2 PATTERN FORMULA D10-T7
Tactical Formula for Patterns While talking to a woman. Amplify these feelings and states by talking. We practice specific parts of areas of the skills we wish to use later on. plus these areas will work for HER because SHE selected them (in a manner of speaking) • Talk and manage the conversation into an area that DOES work for you. certain actions. or navigation.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
6. we have practiced the small details (language skills) so that these are automatic. you make decisions on-the-spot as to what to do and how to proceed. These smaller skills become automatic and you focus instead of driving. get her to "experience" good feelings and states. we work in that manner. A New way of thinking about the use of patterns • The wrong way is to talk to someone and to keep thinking. 6. THAT ends up being a very effective way to create "patterns". that's the key. Patterns are just examples of the use of these tools. In the same manner. or model to be followed in making things. handling the gas pedal.
o Use "this" and "these" (be aware of that and those as well) o Point and mark appropriately Present a Call to action o "Do it now" language o Create a Challenge o Create an Opportunity o Talk about the chance to "Seize the moment" o A simple add-on to the Language Tools
There are two main ways of doing patterns. what you need to do is to look at. "Canned" patterns. "this person. Some times that does happen. So. for her to elaborate and describe o Repeating back what she has said o Provide examples from your own life o Provide examples from friends. • The interesting topic that she and you are discussing o what is happening o what you know
. However. and the proper context is not created. and to use what is needed in the moment.these pre-written or canned patterns can work very well. and do. pre-written patterns that you have seen and heard.. sound quite strange. canned patterns are good. they can. when you are talking to a woman.3 CANNED PATTERNS D10-T12
These are the pre-rehearsed. In THAT case . The good ways to use these are as teaching and learning tools. The problem is if you are SO focused on just "getting to the pattern" that you know (or even one of many that you know) then it's difficult to have a good conversation. In the real world. asking. pre-rehearsed... etc Link and associate those feelings to you o Use the Language Tools o Use linkage phrases like "now with me". But. many times it does not.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
o Get her feeling good and/or exciting feelings o Get her experiencing (or recall the experience of) good and/or exciting feelings o Get her to think about things that she wants or desires Amplify these feelings and states by talking. Their best use is when you use the Conversational Management techniques and then find that the conversation just happens to get to or near a pattern that you DO happen to know already. 6. but they assume that you are in a conversation where they will work and be somewhat "appropriate" to what is being discussed. because doing so may work against you. don't focus TOO much on them. and have them there for your use if and when the correct situation comes up. Pre-written. and real-time "Riffing". clarifying o Use the Language Tools o Asking her for info. or things you have read. if you just "drop" a pattern into the conversation. 6." etc. and that the woman will react to what the patterns is about.4 PATTERN RIFFING IN REAL-TIME D10-T13
This is the ability to just create pattern language on-the-fly. Therefore it is best to maybe have some of these memorized. these canned patterns DO have some usefulness.
Use the language tools so that YOU become associated with those things. and and use the language tools. looking and listening for positive feelings.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
o what she is reacting to o and discuss things which are appropriate. THE BEST PATTERN IS THIS: • • Get her to talk and think about positive. Then you have a conversation and. • Talk about these things or listen to you talk about these things • get her to think about these things • get her to feel these things • get her to link them to you. Yes. get her to. emotions.. and sensual things. interesting. exciting.
. Wanting to take action or seize an opportunity
Always • • • •
See the pattern here? We are in general. using the tools.. • Use some "act now" languaging. states. it really IS that easy! look for: Positive emotions and feeling Positive sensations (as in physical ones) Exciting feelings. and actions in the conversation. Then we use those as a basis for discussion.
Now we can look from the "top-down". 7.1
REVIEW AND SUMMARY
The course has followed a "bottom-up" approach to training. Both you and her talk! 2. focusing first on small details. AND FOLLOW THE COURSE. Use the Language Tools 7. D10-T28
The more energy and effort you put into this. Fractionate if and when needed. and/or compulsion to act a. a. Keep the conversation going. and view an overall strategy. 7. Use the Language Tools 5. Keep her there and keep talking! a.0
7. Use the conversational management techniques b. Direct and/or link those feelings towards you. SOTs) 4. and then building up to bigger and bigger pieces. We really are focused upon changing you. you will benefit. Engage her emotions and imagination in a positive way. DO THE EXERCISES. Get the conversation into good subjects (SOTXs.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
7. but the method of approaching it is very different. the greater your results will be. Use the conversational management techniques b.2 SUMMARY D10-T26
This may be similar to information you have heard in the past.3 LISTEN. Whether its your first. It really is up to you. fifth. comfort in. 3. Create a willingness. Talk about something positive and interesting c. -' d. 1. a. and really take the time to do the exercises.4 BE WILLING AND PREPARED TO PUT ENERGY INTO THIS COURSE. 7. and the more engaged you are in the process. D10-T27
Listen to the full explanations. of fourteenth time through. and how you speak. Direct the conversation in a way that takes you toward good topics a.5 CONGRATULATIONS! WELL DONE! D10-T29
and provide you with some real-world examples of their use.0 EXAMPLES. EXAMPLES. EXAMPLES
The discussions presented on the audio for this section are intentionally "casual" to familiarize you even more with the use of these tools.
.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
. to be cool. • Slow. Mouth. use Adjectives And Adverbs Trance Words Help to get the subconscious mind of the listener to be more of apart of your conversation. powerful.. • If I were to . • If you were to . • Have you ever .. • Instantaneously " Suddenly • Find Yourself • Convince Yourself • Suppose • Imagine " Mysterious (-ly) • Wonder (-ous) (-ously) Weasel Phrases Use Weasel Phrases to keep the conversation going. emotions. allowing you to say more (and maybe more provocative things) about a subject.. so that their feelings. Pause? Energy And Enthusiasm Using energy and enthusiasm when speaking so that people can become energized and enthusiastic about listening to and being with you. and processes awaken. and to "soften " the way in which something is said.... or Chest? Pacing And Pausing Use variations in pace.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
APPENDIX 1 Course "Cheat Sheet"
• SPEAKING POINTERS o The "Cool" Factor You don't have to be cold. • Passionate or Boring?
LANGUAGE TOOLS A N T D E T A I L S o Adjectives And Adverbs Use more adjectives and adverbs in your speech to appeal to and excite the emotional side of the listener. Voice Tone And Tonality Use your best tone of voice (speaking from your chest) to convey a relaxed. and charismatic presence. " As you.. Fast.. to convey a sense of drama and intrigue in what you are saying in a way that "captivates "people and makes them want to listen to you. and well-placed pauses. • Nose. • Be descriptive. • What's it like when ..
• Can you do this now. motion. Point to you • Negative statement. • Use "That" and "Those" when referring to anything negative. Say "that". allowing you to move things more in your favor later on
.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Embedded Commands Use embedded commands repeatedly and in the proper context. interest. • Whenever you say something positive. Say "these"... intrigue. Those • Positive statement. Say "this". • Move! Point! Linking Gestures Towards And Away • Whenever you say something negative. Point away. That. a smile. These. touch them to help anchor it to you. Easy Anchoring When the person you are talking with displays a positive feeling of some type. gesture. laugh. Point to you • Negative Say "those". point or gesture away. to create a compelling will on the part of the listener follow you and listen to you..
MORE TOOLS o Pointing And Gestures Move. link them to you so that YOU become something and someone that they feel good about • Now with me • In me • In myself • with this • these • this belief • these feelings Easy-Linking • Use "This" and "These" when referring to anything positive. Point away • Positive statement. Easy Linking Expanded Pointing With This. etc. Linking After getting someone to experience good feelings and emotions. point or gesture towards yourself. and accentuate what you are saying in order to be more compelling as a speaker and to get even more attention from your listener or audience. • Point Or Touch On Positive
LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES o Pace And Lead Pacing and Leading allows you "be " in the conversation for a while and gain rapport and information.
The more Y. etc. the More Z. • Topics and Subjects • Mindset or Frame of Mind • Current Reality • As (while) you are "X" (Pace) Where "X" is something that is true in their current reality (perceptions. B. • Request X because (of) Y. "List" several things or examples which support your point. statement. keep the discussion focused on a topic that serves your purposes. LAST • Burying Items Listing . statement. the More Y. B. b. but mention the one which YOU want to put the most emphasis on. experiences. Listing • General Listing General Listing is a way to quickly provide several reason. understanding. acknowledgement.another option
. The More Z. or thoughts) use "More and More " as a way to string them together (and increase your chances of that happening • The more X. you can get away with an outrageous or very direct option by burying that option in the middle of a List. or giving an example. and C When making a point.Burying Items is a way to mention an outrageous or very direct option for "testing" purposes. in order to provide more power to what you are saying • At The End Listing at The End is a way to provide several options (which may differ) but to emphasize the option that YOU want. • a. a way that you want. Compare And Contrast Use this technique to keep the conversation going. "List" several things briefly in order. and c When giving examples or options to someone. the More Y. • As you X. and C When making a point. or giving an example. etc.Bad • One option . thoughts. More And More If you want to lead someone through a series of steps (actions. and incorporate the language tools • This thing vs that thing • How two things are similar • How two things are different • Good . etc. the more Y. or to maybe see if you can get someone to agree to it! • a.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Show agreement. and/or interest. which support your point • A. Then start to move or shift things in a different way.) • Then you will "Y" Where "Y" is something you want them to experience (Lead) o Give Them A Reason Giving a reason will make people more apt to do things for you and agree with you.
even when the other person claims or demonstrates that such parts are NOT there • For every part of a person that will work against you..
Opportunities And Challenges • Find out what someone wants. • Use the language tools in the discussion... • You might.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Parts Of A Subject Discussing many of the parts of a subject keeps the conversation going. to be a way for them to get what they want. • If you can . or point in a discussion.. idea. • Find a way to map what YOU want.. or adventurous. can (use smart. • Maybe you can . Parts Of A Person Use Parts of a Person as a way to find. discuss. • You seem as if. • You might see .
. feelings and emotions.... assume there is a part that will work WITH you. allowing you time to gather information and link yourself to good thoughts... • If you are able to .. • The smart people I know. feelings. • Challenge them to demonstrate it. and beliefs. • Challenge them to do that.\ Universal Wants You can assume that most people want these. do it. or fun.... • You may . • Using Their Own Processes • Find or assume what someone wants • Create an opportunity for them to get it or demonstrate they have it • Make that "demonstration" work in your favor. etc).. • etc. or show it.. feelings and emotions to yourself... or want to be perceived as having? • Talk to them and find out... • Are you able to . • Link good thoughts. • Confidence • Maturity • Security • Self-Directed • Intelligence • Control Particular Wants What does she want to have.... • Break it down into its component parts and discuss them. • Take any subject. and evoke favorable states. • I wonder if you can .. Mini-Challenges • You seem. • You seem like .
interesting things. then .. • Can she see an opportunity to have "X".. • Don't engage in conversations when it's NOT about positive. positive. • Navigation Don't think of an exact plan. interesting things • Keep thinking .. positive and interesting. fun.. Creating Them -. think of general navigation • She Must Be Engaged In The Conversation! You need her to talk. fun. Consider the wants and needs that a person may have . General Conversational Management To steer the conversation in a good direction. •• Show interest when someone discusses positive. • Repeat. fun. she may have to do Y to prove that."Where can I go that is fun.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Opportunities. by doing Y? • Does she want you to THINK she has X. listen and be IN the conversation! • Conversational Dynamics Topics flow from one to the next. steer the conversation towards directions that engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way
. • Introduce topics that are fun.. and interesting?" " Move the conversation in that direction.. • Topic Turning Point The process of moving from one topic to one of 6-8 relevant topics • In general. Advanced Conversational Management To direct the conversation into even BETTER areas. • Confidence • Maturity • Security • Self-Directed • Intelligence • Control " • Excitement Challenges Challenge them to get what they want.... Are they ready to take advantage of that (this) opportunity? • Does she really want X and see how Y can get that? • Does she really have X.-and do Y to get it? • Can she do Y and make it happen? • Can she see that Y will get her what she wants? • Can she trust herself enough to do Y?
CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT o
General . bring up positive. or show what they have. and see how doing Y would demonstrate it?> • Does she have what it takes to get X. interesting things.
back up a few steps. use the language tools. Seduction Oriented Topics SOTs are topics that. seductive things?" " Move the conversation in that direction."Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic. by there very nature. and while there. and get the effect. Get the conversation there. seductive tilings? • The entire time: o If you hit a "dead end".Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
• • • o
Keep thinking . use the language tools as much as possible! • What If The Outcome Is Not What You Expected? • Move on!
TOPICS o Topics Of Enthusiasm and Passion Few things are more compelling in a person than for them to be passionate about something (hopefully many things) in life. keep it there. use as many of the language tools as you can. and interesting? • Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner? • Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic. • Keep thinking . Conversational Fractionation • Using Conversational Fractionation • Start • Move • Back Up • Repeat • Dead Ends Come Back To Life! • Just back up and start over! Conversational Overview and Review • General Flow • Start on just about ANY subject. and seductive things. stay there for a while. positive.
More Advanced Conversational Management To further direct the conversation into even BETTER areas. • Repeat. bring up images and thoughts that may work for you. fascinating. fascinating. Repeat. • Connections • Going for it • Making good decisions
.Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner? Move the conversation in that direction. • When on good topics. o If you get to a good subject or topic. steer the conversation towards romantic. • Where can I go that is fun. fascinating.
. Conversational Model With SOTXs. The Complete Conversational Model See Appendix 2
PATTERNS o Pattern • • • • Formula While talking to a woman.. o Wanting to take action or seize an opportunity • Use the language tools.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
• • • • • • • • o
Surrendering to feelings Getting excited Feeling excited Trusting your judgment Taking chances Indulgence Maturity Good decisions
Expanded Seduction Oriented Topics . Present a Call to action. • Get her to.Great as EXAMPLES • Learn and know some of them they may be useful. and • Look for: o Positive emotions and feeling o Positive sensations (as in physical ones) o Exciting feelings.Use the conversational Management Techniques.. • Manage . Link and associate these feelings to you. Those are STOXs. there are easily 6-8 variations on that SOT that you can talk about. get her to "experience" good feelings and states. o Talk about these things or listen to you talk about these things o get her to think about these things o get her to feel these things o get her to link them to you. • Direct .
Canned Patterns .Look out for SOTXs • Direct 0 Move towards SOTs. clarifying. asking. Amplify these feelings and states by talking.SOTXs For each SOT. Pattern Riffing In Real-Time • Use the Conversational Management techniques to get to good subjects • Look at the interesting topic that she and you are discussing o what is happening o what you know o what she is reacting to o and discuss things which are appropriate.
interesting. • Use the language tools so that YOU become associated with those things
. and sensual things. exciting.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Use some "act now" languaging.
o The Best Pattern Is This: • Get her to talk and think about positive.
These. That..Point Or Touch On Positive And Negative LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES o Pace And Lead • Topics and Subjects • Mindset of Frame • Current Reality o Give Them A Reason o Listing " General .) o Easy Anchoring .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
APPENDIX II Speaking and Language Tools "Cheat Sheet"
• SPEAKING POINTERS o Voice Tone And Tonality o Pacing And Pausing o Energy And Enthusiasm LANGUAGE TOOLS AND DETAILS o Adjectives And Adverbs o Trance Words o Weasel Phrases o Embedded Commands o Linking o Easy-Linking (This. That.At the End • Burying Items o More And More o Compare And Contrast o Parts " Parts of a Subject • Parts of a Person o Opportunities And Challenges • Mini Challenges " Opportunities And Challenges o Ambiguities
.. Those) MORE TOOLS o Pointing And Gestures o Linking Gestures (Towards And Away) o Easy Linking Expanded (Pointing With This.
Fascinating. Fun. Positive.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
APPENDIX III The Complete Conversational Management Model
The Complete Conversational Management Model
General Mgt. Seductive
The Complete Conversational Management Model
. and Interesting
Advanced Mgt. Emotions and Imagination in a Positive Way
More Advanced Mgt. Romantic.
interesting .. back up! If you move back to a general topic.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
The Complete Conversational Management Model (continued) Start a Conversation Manage the Conversation Move the Conversation in a Good Direction Steer towards . positive. start over!
. seductive things Direct the Conversation Pay attention when Good Subjects come up (SOTXs) Listen for anything a step or two away from an SOT Move towards SOTs Stay there as long as you can Use The Language Tools! As much as possible.Romantic. Fractionate If you take a wrong turn.Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way .. Steer towards ... Steer towards . fascinating. Especially when at or near SOTXs and SOTs..Fun..