Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
A structured training program that teaches the language and conversational skills of Speed Seduction .
Speed Seduction is a registered trademark of Ross Jeffries, used with permission.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Table of Contents
Page No. Title Page Legal Notices Table of Contents Product Content Product Protection and User Consent Formatting and Conventions Acknowledgements Forward Registration Important Note About Exercises and Assignments 1.0 INTRODUCTION AND GETTING STARTED i ii iii vi vi vii ix x xii xii 1 D1-T1 Disk and Track No.*
1.2 1.3 1.4 1.5 1.6 2.0 2.1 2.1.1 2.1.2 2.1.3 2.1.4 2.2 2.2.1 2.2.2 2.2.3 2.2.4 2.2.5 2.2.6 2.3 2.3.1 2.3.2 2.3.3 2.3.4 2.4 3.0 3.1 3.1.1
Why Is This Course Needed? What We Will Handle, and How Investing In Yourself, Or Not Can We Change The Way You Speak? Manipulation and Ethics Concerns SPEAKING AND LANGUAGE
1 2 3 4 5 7
D1-T10 D1-T15 D1-T24 D1-T26 D1-T32 D2-T1 D2-T1 D2-T1 D2-T2 D2-T15 D2-T26 D2-T39 D2-T40 D3-T1 D3-T14 D3-T25 D3-T42 D4-T1 D4-T12 D4-T14 D4-T22 D4-T30 D4-T35 D4-T46 D5-T1 D5-T2 D5-T9
Speaking Pointers 7 The "Cool" Factor 7 Voice Tone and Tonality 7 Pacing and Pausing 9 Energy and Enthusiasm 10 Language Tools and Details 12 Adjectives and Adverbs 12 Trance Words 13 Weasel Phrases 15 Embedded Commands 17 Linking 19 Easy-Linking (This, That, These, Those) 21 More Tools 23 Pointing and Gestures 24 Linking Gestures (Towards and Away) 25 Easy Linking Expanded (Pointing With This, That, These, Those ...) 26 Easy Anchoring - Point Or Touch, On Positive 27 Review 29 LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES Pace and Lead General Pace and Lead Techniques 31 31 32
* Disk and Track Numbers References to the CDs and the tracks on them are shown in a format such as "D2-T4", which in this example refers to Disk 2, Track 4.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Table of Contents (continued)
Page No. 3.1.2 3.1.3 3.1.4 3.2 3.3 3.3.1 3.3.2 3.3.3 3.3.4 3.3.5 3.4 3.5 3.6 3.6.1 3.6.2 3.7 3.7.1 3.7.2 3.7.3 3.7.4 3.8 3.9 4.0 4.1 4.1.1 4.1.2 4.1.3 4.1.4 4.2 4.2.1 4.2.2 4.2.3 4.3 4.3.1 4.3.2 4.3.3 4.3.4 4.3.5 4.4 4.4.1 4.4.2 4.4.3 4.4.4 4.4.5 4.5 4.5.1 4.5.2 Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects Pace and Lead-Mindset Or Frame Of Mind Pace and Lead - Current Reality Give Them a Reason Listing General Listing Listing - At The End Listing - Burying Items Listing, Pauses, and Emphasis.. Listing Review More and More Compare and Contrast Parts Parts of a Subject Parts of a Person Opportunities and Challenges Using Their Own Processes What Do People Want? Mini-Challenges Opportunities and Challenges Ambiguities Summary CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT Challenges Detailed and Specific Plans Are Just Not Workable Navigation Example Navigational Strategies Are Needed She Must Be Engaged In The Conversation! How Conversations Happen Conversational Dynamics Conversational Model Topic Turning Point General Conversational Management Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Want How To Steer Conversations, Moment To Moment The Model With Strategy and Tactics In Place Exercises and Assignments Summary Advanced Conversational Management Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Really Want Steering Conversations Moment To Moment The Model With Advanced Strategy and Tactics In Place Exercises and Assignments Summary More Advanced Conversational Management More About Getting The Conversation To Go Steering Conversations Using More Advanced 33 35 38 39 41 41 43 45 48 48 48 51 54 54 58 61 62 62 63 64 69 69 71 71 71 71 72 72 72 72 73 77 79 79 81 82 83 86 86 86 88 88 91 93 93 93 94 Disk a n d Track N o . * D5-T12 D5-T20 D5-T29 D5-T32 D6-T1 D6-T4 D6-T15 D6-T24 D6-T36 D6-T37 D6-T38 D6-T54 D7-T1 D7-T4 D7-T15 D7-T34 D7-T36 D7-T38 D7-T40 D7-T43 D7-T64 D7-T66 D8-T1 D8-T1 D8-T3 D8-T4 D8-T5 D8-T10 D8-T12 D8-T13 D8-T14 D8-T15 D8-T16 D8-T16 D8-T19 D8-T23 D8-T25 D8-T32 D8-T33 D8-T33 D8-T35 D8-T38 D8-T39 D8-T46 D8-T47 D8-T47 D8-T49
6.6.2 4.0 The Model With More Advanced Strategy and Tactics In Place. .4 5.
APPENDICES I II III Course "Cheat Sheet" Speaking and Language Tools "Cheat Sheet" The Complete Conversational Management Model 123 131 133
.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Table of Contents (continued)
Page No. and Follow The Course Be Willing and Prepared To Put Energy Into Congratulations! Well Done! EXAMPLES. Do The Exercises.3 7.3 5. 94 96 96 97 97 98 99 99 99 99 101 101 102 104 109 111 115 115 115 116 116 119 119 119 119 119 119 121 Disk a n d Track N o .3 5.7. .2 4.3 4.6 4.0 7.0 5.1 6.5.0 6. Conversational Fractionation The 1-Shot Beeline Fallacy How Fractionation Works Using Conversational Fractionation Dead Ends Come Back To Life! Conversational Overview and Review Conversational Management Approach What If The Outcome Is Not What You Expected? Summary TOPICS Topics Of Enthusiasm and Passion Seduction Oriented Topics Expanded Seduction Oriented Topics .4 7..6.2 7.4 4. .5 8.3 4...1 5.7.1 4.3 6. .. EXAMPLES.1 4.6.SOTXs Conversational Model With SOTXs The Complete Conversational Model PATTERNS Pattern O v e r Pattern Formula Canned Patterns Pattern Riffing In Real-Time REVIEW AND SUMMARY Review Summary Listen. EXAMPLES v i e w .2 6.2 5.7 4. 4.4 7. * D8-T52 D9-T1 D9-T2 D9-T3 D9-T5 D9-T6 D9-T7 D9-T8 D9-T9 D9-T10 D9-T11 D9-T14 D9-T15 D9-T24 D9-T32 D9-T33 D10-T1 D10-T1 D10-T7 D10-T12 D10-T13 D10-T18 D10-T18 D10-T26 D10-T27 D10-T28 D10-T29 D11
.7.5 6.1 7. .
Usually the graphic is shown on the page immediately following where that graphic is first mentioned in the text.e. or major points in the workbook. This shows (for example) the Disk (3) and the Track number (5) that corresponds to that part of the workbook contents. Graphics are used in the workbook as well. This shows information that could be considered part of an overall "outline" of what the audio presentation contains. Italicized Text . However these conventions are guidelines. and the Formulas. a "serif typeface). The relationship between these two can be best described by considering the workbook text to be (for the most part) an "outline" of what is presented in the audio. There are certain conventions used in the formatting of the workbook.that is simply to show a list of related items. styles.At times. graphic captions. there is not an exact place in the book that correlates to the start of each and every track on the audio CDs. i. Lists . and the italics are simply used as a way to show a different manner of emphasis. and Assignments are all shown using this typeface (Arial.Boldface Text is used to emphasize certain text or passages. Although there are paragraphs of explanatory text. and to make it easier to reference those items at a later time. Therefore most of the track references are shown at the start of major sections. It is also used for subject headings so that these stand out and apart from the normal text. Listen to the audio where an example is presented. A majority of the workbook is presented in an "outline" form. The audio is NOT an exact duplicate of the text shown in the workbook. these are in most cases presented as a way to augment the content of the audio presentation. and their use is key to many students' understanding of the concepts presented. . or clarity..
Samples of the formatting and conventions used:
Typefaces . items are presented in a list-like fashion such as this: • Item 1 • Item 2 • Item 3 • Etc.Italicized Text is used for emphasis in many cases where boldface text may by nearby. The graphics in the latter sections are significant in that they are an essential part of the understanding and leaning. and conventions have been developed and are used throughout this transcript/workbook. Not every track number is listed. The written text is NOT a transcript. Exercises. graphic titles.
. Boldface Text . CD Location References are shown using terms such as "D3-T5" in the text. Italics are also used to point the reader towards specific content of the audio CDs.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Formatting and Conventions
The following formatting. D3-T5 CD Track References .As shown to the right Towards the right margin of section titles and headings. a "sans-serif typeface). If the graphic cannot fit there (due to page breaks) then the graphic is placed on the next available page. there may be instances when the conventions are not used for the sake of emphasis. Since the work book is an "outline" and not a transcript.A majority of the workbook content is shown in this typeface (Times New Roman.
Text within graphics..
Text boxes are used for very specific purposes in the workbook. it is required in order for the "flow" of the book content to remain consistent. The number is in the format of "XYZ-A" where "XYZ" denotes the number of the section where the graphic is placed.The workbook is laid out to minimize the amount of blank space where reasonably possible.If a graphic has text that helps to further explain that graphic. but that is a necessity due to the complexity of the book.
Candidate Topics Figure XYZ-1: Graphic Title Sub-paragraph . This may require that a graphic be placed on the next page after where it is first mentioned (instead of being directly below where the graphic is first mentioned in the text). or technique. and Assignments are shown inside boxes such as this. an Exercise may require interaction with other people.
Formula. there are instances where the definitions may be clouded to some degree.e. there are cases where text boxes may actually "break" across two pages. This also may result in some page breaks being in places which are not optimal. Each Formula is presented in its own "text box" as shown here. Exercises are a series of instructions that call upon the reader to do or perform certain actions. Most exercises can be done alone. Although this is not optimal. . fact.
. Similarly. then that text is shown immediately below the graphic using an indented paragraph such as this. Text Boxes .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Each graphic has a number and a title of some type. or maybe and Assignment can be done alone by the student. This is shown below. -2.1 . Assignments usually requier the reader to go out and interact with other person(s) in order to perform them correctly.
Page Breaks . -3) to account for multiple graphics in one section of text. For example. Although the difference between Exercises and Assignments is maintained through most of the workbook. Assignments also call for action on the part of the reader. and the "A" indicates the number of the graphic within a section itself (i. Exercises. A Formula is a way to present a concise explanation of some item.
and who has also contributed greatly to helping men change their minds about themselves. and this wait may have annoyed a few people. the creator of Speed Seduction . Yates Canipe. Thank you. and have opened the door for me to find many ways of self-improvement and understanding. MC.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
The first and foremost acknowledgement goes out to Ross Jeffries himself. To those in the original SD Lair group. and what is possible in their lives. and students (we are each all of these and more) in the TAGR Group. who was the business genius that brought Speed Seduction® to the masses through seminars and products. who helped me by allowing me to help them. To Dr. SP. mentors. The main reason is that I do not wish to release any product until I believe that I am able to provide the level of quality. and to all of the Students out there who I have met at Speed Seduction® seminars. Special thanks to my friends. who have placed their trust in me and allowed me the experience of showing them new and wonderful possibilities for what their lives may have to offer. Working with these clients was especially instrumental in formulating and perfecting the concepts and teaching methods used in this product. confidants. To my coaching clients.. teachers. opening the door for many into the world of self improvement. colleagues. but I sincerely hope that the results will prove to have made the wait worthwhile. and those who have entrusted me to teach you and to guide you. and MD. JL. SM. To the many experts out there who have augmented the SS teachings by showing me other aspects of the mind. To all of you. DM. those who have read what I have written. .insight and teaching that I think is possible. Dave Riker
. Ross's developments have lead not only to helping many men with this part of their lives. I may miss a few sales because of such a delay. but have also shown many the way to a new way of living. associates. EVS. most notably Hypnotica. / must apologize to some degree for the time it has taken to finish this product. and for the assistance they provided with this product. and to help you in finding the Women or Woman of Your Dreams..
And I am here to help correct it. and showing themselves in the best and most honest light. At least then he will be in a position of choice. and sharing experiences with them. spending time with them. is up to him. They don't know how to keep a woman's interest. are the ones that really DO look at this area of their lives. The women of the world will be better off in their own way. He will be able to decide for himself which he feels is the best option for him.
. So. that they will want to spend time with as well. should somehow not improve himself. there are a lot of great men out there who would like to meet interesting women. or "compromise". (and more importantly a LACK of information in some cases) that can prevent such connections and moments from happening. Good. there are a lot of wonderful women out there who would love to meet interesting men. that I create products such as this. teachings. women. other people. charming men. Whether a man decides to use this information as way to embark upon a period of his life which involves casual romantic interludes. This is so sad. interesting. as well. helps to provide these women with an even better choice. I know of many women who are always distraught that they seem to not be able to meet good men. They are the ones that really don't know how to introduce themselves. From that position. Having many interesting men available. whether this time has any sort of romantic or seductive component or not. the idea of simply communicating with and sharing experiences with the other half of the human population. As if the interesting.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
One of the most wonderful things about life is the idea of connecting with others. Sadly this is most apparent when it comes to men. It's for these men. and introducing themselves. she should decide to be with whom she wants to be with by having opportunities. most women will be far better off and have much better chances with the kind of men. in fact. for some reason seem to be in short supply. some of the most wonderful moments of life are brought about by people. There are many such men out there. or don't know how to present themselves in the best way. One of the biggest tragedies of life is that there are things. and set forth upon a path to improve this area of his life. Many men through no fault of their own have grown up to be adults and have had little instruction or assistance in a very important area of their lives. intelligent. so that they really may share wonderful experiences of ALL types with women. and grow. good-natured and well-intentioned man. and options. are NOT in short supply. And it's a shame for these women to be wanting for their company. Such men. and decide to move forward. learn. and in many cases the efforts of men to solve this problem on their own have been met by smallminded criticism and slander. They just have not been taught such things. information. and for those women. or whether a man uses this information as a means to improve his chances of finding one special woman. Whether that be as friends or acquaintances. to make an informed choice. the best men. or with that special woman of which they have always dreamed. A woman should never "settle". having and sharing experiences with. take action. who was simply deprived of an means to "learn about" how to meet and talk with women. I think that is not correct. I think that many men. or the kind of man. And.
. of your dreams. and applied by men. So in my own way. read. So guys . somewhat happier and able to enjoy their lives even more than before.. Get out there. my goal and my hope is that this product will make men. or Woman. Study. Apply. Dave Riker
. Have fun. and women. understood. even though this product is intended to be read. the benefits are meant to be for both men and women alike. Learn.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course So. And good luck in finding The Women.
You are already on your way! This course works on many levels. These techniques all need to sound and be "natural" to actually be effective. If you follow along and do the exercises. you can change the way you speak as well. and what works in the field.
This program is based upon experience with countless students. and "reprogrammed" in a way. You are not going to sound like this or talk like this all of the time! Just in the way that you shift and change how you speak now in different situations. along with spaces for written responses where necessary. We will teach you ways to easily manage conversations so that they go in interesting directions. then on some level. but this will help you if you are not. and get the full benefit of everything this course has to offer. Listen to it. If you are her "type" you don't need this.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
1.2 WHY IS THIS COURSE NEEDED? D1-T10
If you are here. to use these language skills naturally as just a part of the way they speak. there is a need. Present a series of exercises and assignments. Instructions for each are provided. Conversational Skills The ability to manage conversations is needed as well. Provide additional explanation of some points that are covered in the audio program. seeing what is needed.0
1. So even this "intro" section is starting to work for you. We will be teaching you the detailed language skills that will really help you. pay attention. 1. consciously and subconsciously. This workbook is meant to studied along with a series of audio lectures that are recorded on CDs. some people do this naturally. and on you as well. The purpose of this workbook is to: • • • Provide an outline of the material covered in the audio program. You will have this way of speaking as a PART of who you are and what you can do! Guys need to be trained. Some guys don't need this.1
INTRODUCTION AND GETTING STARTED
Welcome and Thanks. Welcome to Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course. Language Skills What works? What makes the successful guys able to use these technologies? Partly it's the ability to actually "talk" in this manner. you will do so in the future and use these techniques as well.
. • Working on several "levels" of you mind at once • Models to arrive at an overall understanding • Left brain and right brain are both addressed • Conscious and subconscious minds are both given what they need for real understanding and retention. must react to a steady flow of new information without interruption. interacting. some of the ways that you speak now will be reprogrammed so that speaking in a new way will be natural." Guys need to stop the worrying about "Doing something wrong" It's only "wrong" if you are TRYING to do or be something you are not.. responding. • Things may seem to "repeat". that is important. and how people speak. so we need to approach this in many ways. Sure. • Exercises to develop understanding and skills • Assignments for you to do in the field.
. listening.Enthusiasm and Passion Topics . but if you are "thinking" too much.. respond to input immediately .Seduction Oriented Topics Patterns and Riffing Examples Dl-Tl5
What Methods Are Used • Describe and explain the details of the techniques • Explicit examples of how the details work • Examples throughout and within the discussions • Examples section at the end. talking.3 Major • • • • • • • • WHAT WE WILL HANDLE. Real Time "Occurring immediately . so let's define and explain it for you. listen.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
You have to be PROGRAMMED to do this so you can have a conversation. and be a part of it. how it is learned. but it's really YOU talking! Guys are too focused on "how can I use this" when in a conversation. then you are not actually IN the conversation! You need to be engaged in a conversation.. but that's your left brain talking! We are reprogramming many years of your experience. not a "trick". You need to integrate skills to the degree that they ARE a part of who you ARE. many times! • In fact we have already started! Where Does This Material Come From • From SS Teachings. Guys need to be able to just "do this" and "talk this way" in REAL-TIME. • Other teachings about language.. Other parts of the language tools you may have to "think" about. This is a term that will be used throughout this course. some things will sound quite familiar. AND HOW Topics Speaking Pointers Language Tools and Details Conversational Management Conversational Fractionation Topics . In a way. for a while at least. Not inside your head "thinking" about "how can I use this?"! 1..
but in terms of THEM really being willing and ready to change. If they just "try" it. The Mind-Momentum Principle At Work • Get energy. you are doing just that. Be wary of those people who may want to "borrow" a copy. effort. If you need to make your own copies for use in multiple locations. they aren't really putting themselves INTO it. and engagement into your effort to really learn and use these materials. do it! But please. From working with clients and seeing what worked and how they were able to change. • Get some other written material to work with for this course. The best way to listen to this course is while also reviewing the workbook (especially in the conversational management sections). Is this information. see what works for you. Other SS products will work well.
.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
• • • •
From personal experiences and how I used the materials. to give you a real roadmap to actually learn the material. • Is there an "optimal way" to use the product. However. new. effort. and this is much easier if you have an active life where you can have many conversations. many of these people will be those negative types of people that will then dispute the benefits of this program! Why? Because THEY have not invested anything into it! Not just in terms of dollars. and who may "try" to listen to the course. do the exercises over and over. Applying a structured methodology of step-by-step methods. So. In addition. • Listen to other products in conjunction with this product. However. Many of the assignments will deal with talking to people.
The Ways To Study And Use The Product • Listen to the CDs. • Get that "Mind-Momentum" going to help you change and improve. Also maybe get a romance novel or two. and a few women's magazines as well. as assigned or as required. We are reprogramming years and years of you "speaking" in a certain manner.4 INVESTING IN YOURSELF. • This may seem complicated but the point is to get you SO familiar with the tools that you become the guy who does this! Some Very Important Points • Find all of your current SS products and inventory them. You will need them because you will have assignments that deal with these. the emphasis here is training you to do it for yourself. • Follow along in the workbook if you can • Do the exercises and assignments! • Listen over and over. • Be prepared to have a place to practice for this course! You will need to be able to speak out loud to do many of the exercises. listening multiple times in any setting also has a lot of benefit. and engagement. do the assignments over and over! • Be patient. Changing that will take some time. a concept that was brought up earlier. that YOU just DO. keep those copies to yourself. the more you will get out of it. or not? There are various ways. 1. the more you put into it. and this journey. By embarking upon this course. making it a part of YOU. • Having a good social life will help you. However. and being open to what benefits this program can bring. or revised? Yes. both audio and written materials. there IS some overlap and duplication with other products and systems. do whatever you need to do to listen to this course a LOT. OR NOT D1-T24
Any real change requires you to make an investment in yourself using energy.
just being YOU. there is a "right" and "wrong" way to do it! But if you are just TALKING. trying to "remember" what to say. sentences. Then it's about a "performance. Most people want to approach this by learning bits and pieces • • That's good in a way. its a memorized "thing". you heard it. there is no "right" way or "wrong" way. You keep trying to "remember" things. Imagine having to "think about" how to talk.
How People Initially Learn How To Speak • • • • Sure in middle school. and you started to form the ability to speak and communicate based upon that!
. It's less effective.But This Is A Different Type Of Learning. • • • • • • You will get some details. where you use the skills in the real world. some structures. some models. And actual assignments. Immersion is the key. But that's not how you learned to talk! You learned to talk when you were a child .5 CAN WE CHANGE THE WAY YOU SPEAK? D1-T26
Is this really possible? This sounds difficult. but to then USE it in conversation is difficult. will not benefit. Those who are not. • • • • • • • • This might be good as a learning TOOL. consequently. at will Engage in conversation Manage conversations
Yes. You will end up "memorizing" thing to some degree. you heard it in context. Can we literally change the way you speak? • • • • • • • How you select words Create phrases Form sentences Pick topics Speak passionately. its YOU being YOU! You cannot fail at being YOU!
The approach in this course is different. Also progressive exercises. you heard it a lot." So. Don't let their lack of willingness to improve themselves. Not as congruent. But it's tough to do that. where you learn skills piece by piece.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
People must be engaged in the process to get its benefits. Plus it's not YOU talking. about grammar. 1. hold you back. It Is Possible! .by hearing others around you speak! You were IMMERSED in language. because you will hear it so much! But a LOT of what is being conveyed here is learning by EXAMPLE. It makes guys nervous. because it addresses that analytical part of your mind. etc. paragraphs. at every moment!
Some people want to try to memorize. kids are taught about language. but only indirectly. then its easier.
We will have you become familiar with the range of ways of speaking and sounding. more natural. trade. Various Training Methods • • We use a lot of repetitive training methods so that these techniques have a better chance of becoming "automatic". or craft. Real-World Skills. • Break it down into small parts. deep ethics issues and blocks many guy's success. where I am just DOING these things all during the program. like when I say "here is an example" Implicit examples. we will change the way you talk so that it will be easier. so that you will have more ability and more flexibility to do what is appropriate MANIPULATION AND ETHICS CONCERNS D1-T32
1. more a part of YOU. it's not about throwing something AT her. With THIS approach HERE. based upon feelings that when using them.
. Examples • • Explicit examples. and be more of WHO YOU ARE. This causes some real. which we go over and over. "it's not me" or "I am just using a trick or technique". and who and what YOU are! Using these skills will be less of an "act".6
Many guys have been uncomfortable with using many of these skills. how you communicate.
Exercises and Assignments to Teach You the Skills • Skills Training like any sport.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
This Course Uses Many Techniques To Train You To Have Workable.
focusing on the back of your throat might make this easier to do). there ARE products that focus JUST on this area and you may want to invest in those. This is good as long as it's not BORING. etc. That "cool" feeling comes from being calm and speaking in a relaxed fashion. focusing on generating your voice from your nose. The audio section demonstrates these options quite well. there are great products and examples of this elsewhere.
SPEAKING AND LANGUAGE
SPEAKING POINTERS The "Cool" Factor D2-T1 D2-T1
Guys want to sound "cool". Why is this important? • Great voice tone conveys comfort. We will work on this here in this course. how they make you feel. reserved. BORING. Read several paragraphs.1 2. how they sound. and what people like in general. how calm you are. not out of nervousness. That's what women like. and read it aloud. but giving the impression that there IS more. do this for several minutes. and says a lot about you. something you are interested in.1. That's the "allure". Too many guys "try" to be cool but actually come off as COLD or even worse. 1) Take some of that reading material. but if you really want to work on this even more. how interesting you are. a sense of being relaxed and calm • It also allows you to express some energy and excitement at different times. calm. even some of the materials from other products. but because it's appropriate to the situation. Examples: One way to think of this is to consider "where" your voice is generated from in your body. and this time focus on speaking by generating the sound from within your mouth (or. that there is a "fire" beneath the surface.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
2. and even goes a bit over-the-top to really help you to understand what is being discussed. Your tone of voice really conveys a lot about who you are.2 Voice Tone and Tonality D2-T2
Listen to some examples of different tones of voice. If this is a challenge for you. 2. Cool does NOT mean to be boring and to put people to sleep while talking! The coolest people are the ones that are FUN to talk to and fun to be with! You don't have to be cold. to be cool.1. "Cool" comes from being calm and sure of yourself. Listen as the examples demonstrate: • Speaking through the nose • Speaking through the mouth • Speaking from the chest
Exercises for Speaking Pointers Grab some reading material of some type.0
2. 2) Read some more of that material out loud.
and where you are speaking from (your nose. make note of how you felt (nervous. mouth. relaxed-confident).
2) In the next few conversations you have with people. Focus on dropping your voice down from your nose/mouth. or chest). and really focus on having that voice generated from your chest. comfortable. Make notes below as to when it happened. but to actually HAVE the skills.in the real world! To get the most benefit from this course. 1) Over the next few days when speaking to anyone.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
3) Now read some of the material. Make notes below for some of the conversations and see if you can see a correlation between these items. and make them a part of who you are. where you were. but this time really focus upon generating the sound from deep within your chest. Real-world experience will really help you to not just "know" the skills. Assignments are where you are given a real task to go out and do . and whether or not you DID it! Day/Time Who you spoke to Situation (Where) Did you DO it?
. Day/Time Who you spoke to Speaking from? How you felt. and recall some time in the recent past when you were kind of nervous or fearful. make a note to yourself as to how you are speaking. Also. Can you recall how you spoke? Did the way you sound in that situation sound like any of the examples you just did? See the similarity?
Assignments for Speaking Pointers These are your first real assignments in the course. with whom. it's important that you do what you can to REALLY make a point of doing these assignments. SOUND relaxed. Relax. really make a note to speak lower. See how relaxed it actually makes you feel and how you really need to BE relaxed to do this! 4) Take a moment.
or don't quite understand the content. or almost a sense of panic. 1) Take some of that reading material and read it aloud. in a manner that makes you sound as if you are very confused. Focus on reading in a very hurried fashion as if you are very nervous. 2) Read some more of that material out loud.
There are many variations: Listen as these are demonstrated • Hurried showing nervousness • Hurried showing excitement • Slow as in hesitant and/or confused • Slow in a way that is deliberate and relaxed
Exercises for Pacing and Pausing Grab some reading material of some type. as we discussed in the past section.1. (Maybe even be aware of where your voice is coming from.)
Assignments for Pacing and Pausing 1) Over the next few days when speaking to anyone. Something you are interested in. and then far far too slow. Read several paragraphs and do this for several minutes. make a note to yourself as to how you are speaking in terms of your pacing and pausing. Too fast? Too slow? Hurried-nervous? Hurried-excited? Slow-confused?
. Speaking too quickly can show tension. even some of the materials from other products. and shows that the speaker is relaxed. but this time read it in a slow. 4) Now read some of the material. Why is • • • this important? Correct pacing and speed of delivery conveys comfort. deliberate. comfortable manner. and charismatic presence. and this time focus on reading in a quick and hurried fashion. Being able to vary your pacing and pausing can help a lot to convey a sense of intrigue and create interest.3
Pacing and Pausing
Listen to the examples where some various pacing is demonstrated. relaxed. but go ahead and convey excitement in your voice! 3) Now read some of the material.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Strategic Formula for Speaking Pointers Use your best tone of voice (speaking from your chest) to convey a relaxed. but this time read it slowly. powerful. first very very fast.
who. When someone else is being boring. where.1. energy. • This also allows YOU to convey how interesting someone ELSE is as well. It's good to have the ability and range to display passion. Who cares? Why does this matter? • Most guys are just TOO BORING. dead-end conversations. Day/Time Who you spoke to What type of pacing and pausing?
2) For the next few days. Make note of when. just make a note of this after-the-fact and write that down below. to convey a sense of drama and intrigue in what you are saying in a way that "captivates" people and makes them want to listen to you. and well-placed pauses. If they do or say something that is interesting to YOU.
2. start to focus on changing your pacing and pausing.. to convey a more relaxed and deliberate manner.
. enthusiasm. and excitement when appropriate. then you can show more enthusiasm.. • If someone else is being interesting.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course Slow-relaxed? You don't have to change it yet. or bored. and if you DID it! Day/Time Who you spoke to Situation (Where) Did you DO it?
Strategic Formula for Pacing and Pausing Use variations in pace. YOU can show an appropriate amount of energy and enthusiasm. YOU act boring.4
Energy and Enthusiasm
Listen to some examples of how this can sound . By doing this.. you get stuck in fewer boring.
and how much (or little) energy is conveyed. Watch on either TV. Do this for a good 10-15 minutes.. even some of the materials from . and read that aloud in a boring. and that are excited about. do that for 10-15 minutes. their tone. do that for 10-15 minutes. go ahead.
. Note how even if the material is something you do NOT care about. etc. dry topic. that a good speaker can really grab your attention with their energy and enthusiasm. technical presentations. 4) Get some written material that really DOES interest you. 5) Take that written material that really does interest you. bland voice with no energy or enthusiasm.
Assignments for Energy and Enthusiasm 1) Over the next few days. go ahead and SHOW your enthusiasm! Be energetic in how you speak. Read it OUT LOUD in a boring. Read it OUT LOUD in an exciting.. and how your respond. 2) Watch and listen to some speakers who use a lot of energy and enthusiasm when they are talking! Really pay attention to how they speak. 6) Take that earlier written material about the subject that you are NOT interested in and that really bores you. BE BORING and show no enthusiasm at all.
Strategic Formula for Energy and Enthusiasm Using energy and enthusiasm when speaking so that people can become energized and enthusiastic about listening to and being with you. make sure it is something that YOU are passionate about. something you are interested in. whatever it is. women. Again.. and how much (or little) energy is conveyed. and BE BORING. their pace.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
The audio section demonstrates more details about sounding boring/bored and also sounding as if you have energy and enthusiasm. When you respond or talk back. their tone. how you listen. 3) Get some written material that you have NO interest in. and read THAT aloud in a way that DOES show energy and enthusiasm! Make that sound as convincing as #4 above. whenever someone is talking about something boring. which bores you. 2) For the next few conversations you have with people where you ARE interested in the subject. other products.. Think as if YOU are convincing a group of people how great this is! Maybe your Dream Job of a lifetime is dependant upon YOU speaking well and showing how passionate YOU are about this! Do that for a good 10-15 minutes. bland. Really pay attention to how they speak. maybe sports. Again. your work. energetic voice. your car. taped lectures. their pace. monotone voice. animated.
Exercises for Energy and Enthusiasm Grab some reading material of some type. monotone. 1) Watch and listen to some speakers talk about a boring.
not the logical side of a person. and more ways of talking about processes.. use more Adjectives and Adverbs. talk about it in a descriptive way.2
LANGUAGE TOOLS AND DETAILS
These are the Bit And Pieces • These are the sort of things that can be powerful. while Adverbs will describe ACTIONS (verbs). feelings. These words modify or in some way describe. Most men could be helped by having more descriptive speech. (Maybe highlight them in some manner. Most guys are too dry in their speech. whatever. They sound cold. Most Adjectives and Adverbs are qualitative. Adjectives will describe THINGS (nouns). and make note of the adjectives and adverbs in it. add more descriptive terms to it. out loud. or they are too factual and leftbrained. talk about each thing or subject again.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
2. because to have to "think about" using them is almost impossible! • You need to be TRAINED TO USE THEM automatically.. Maybe say those adjectives or adverbs and put more energy into those words and emphasize them in some manner. Examples • Car reviews • Movie Reviews • This course!
Exercises for Adjectives and Adverbs 1) Find some written material that deals with something where people are speaking passionately about some subject. • Their use must be automatic. Re-live it. 2. and sensations. and stress the adjectives and adverbs in it. and uninteresting. they are not things that can be measured or specified. 4) Think of three recent conversations you had when you talked to someone about something that you REALLY liked. movies. If you really like this subject. Remember. nouns and verbs. and the subject you were talking about. boring. but must be done over and over. Note whom you were talking to.
. It's good if YOU are also interested in it. 2) Read it. Day. Do this for each of the conversations listed above.2.) 3) Read that text OUT LOUD. Who you spoke to Subject
5) Now.1 Adjectives and Adverbs D2-T40
Listen to an example where many of these are used in descriptive language. we are working to appeal to the emotions. but this time. Cars. sports. you should be able to do this for at least 3-5 minutes each.
Be descriptive. and with whom you spoke. Write down what the subject was.
Strategic Formula for Adjectives and Adverbs Use more adjectives and adverbs in your speech to appeal to and excite the emotional side of the listener. emotions. or objective manner.2. b. Trance words help to "open the person up" so that their subconscious. that you really enjoy. and processes awaken. "paint a picture" with your words. Act like you are really having the conversation again. factual. that you are passionate about. their emotional side. and c above). Trance words are words that "call upon" the subconscious mind in order for them to be processed and understood.
3) Practice out loud how you would have said those things in each of the three conversations. Trance • • • • • Word List Instantaneously Suddenly Find Yourself Convince Yourself Suppose
. so that their feelings.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Assignments for Adjectives and Adverbs 1) Make note of the next 3 times you are having a conversation which deals with something that YOU are really into. They are not "analyzed" in a conscious.2
Listen to an example where many of these are used. Start with just a few of them.
2. 4) The next several times any of those subjects come up in conversation. make sure to use some of those adjectives and adverbs in your descriptions. is listening and more engaged in the conversation. Day Who you spoke to Subject
2) Write down a few adjectives and adverbs that you could have used in each discussion (refer to a. and then maybe add some more as time goes on.
7) Pick a subject that bores you. See how many you can notice. Maybe play one tape or CD. 6) Pick two subjects in which you are interested. talk about it. work. Highlight or circle the Trance Words in a few sections. Think for a moment about using those trance words to describe that subject. See how many you can find and notice how they are used in context. something that you think is dull. 4) Get your SS audio materials and listen for Trance Words (maybe even THIS course here). sportscasters. Trance Word List
2) Watch or listen to some material where people are speaking passionately about something. and make it more interesting? Well. Boring Subject
. placing an emphasis on the Trance Words when you see them. Write them down below. You can copy the ones you saw listed earlier. Subject b. like advertisements. 3) Get out your written SS materials and look for Trance Words (maybe even use THIS course here). and see how many of those Trance Words you can use. Now speak OUT LOUD about that subject. With that list of Trance Words (above) in hand. almost boring or mundane thing. or religious speakers. see and hear if you can pick out when the speaker is using Trance Words. even something concrete like your job.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • • Imagine Mysterious (-ly) Wonder (-ous) (-ously)
Think of any subject. but also see if you can add some to the list. Looking at the list of Trance Words above. political speakers. that's the point!
Exercises for Trance Words 1) Make a full list of Trance Words. Look at the Trance Word List above. 5) Take the written text from an SS product (maybe from #3 above) and read it out loud. Maybe refer to some of your other SS products and see how many more you can find. or school. Doesn't that make it sound kind of "mysterious"? Maybe more exciting? Maybe you can take some normal. talk OUT LOUD about that subject and see how many times you can use those Trance Words! Subject a. and see if you can pick these out.
• • • • • Have you ever ..2. and more fascinating?
Assignments for Trance Words 1) Pick two subjects in which you are interested.3
Listen to an example where many of these are used.. The next time you are speaking with anyone about those subjects (in the real world guys!). make a point to use at least one of the Trance Words in the conversation. What's it like when . If I were to . to get from one subject to another..
. How do you talk about something without REALLY talking about it? How do you bring something up that may be a bit different.... If you were to . that's what Weasel Phrases are for! Weasel Phrase List (see if you can add to the list by listening to the audio). Subject a.... Subject b. more interesting. because it may be a bit too forward? Well. doesn't that make it-sound more "exciting". maybe even a bit odd? Maybe even a different topic or change of subject? Or maybe something that you were worried about bringing up..
2. 2) Integrate a few more of these words into your every-day description of those subjects. Use them when talking to different people. Just do whatever you can to start using some of them at first.
These also work as transitional phrases.
Strategic Formula for Trance Words Using Trance Words will help to get the subconscious mind of the listener to be more of a part of your conversation.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Even though that may seem a bit strange. Practice working with those subjects out loud some more and see if you can get even more comfortable using Trance Words when talking about those subjects. and using more and more as time goes on. As you .
we want you to talk about how it FEELS. make note of the weasel phrases. Take a moment and try to emphasize them in a way. doing it.
Assignments for Weasel Phrases 1) Look at the list of Weasel Phrases that you wrote earlier. after another. but selecting different Phrases to link the aspects together. 3) Take the written SS materials you had earlier. then use another Weasel Phrase. sensing it. Do this until you use all 4-5 of the attributes that you listed. and read some of this material out loud. For example. Maybe play one tape or CD. In a moment. getting into it. saying one slowly or quickly. The next several times that you talk about that subject with anyone.. etc. that it makes more sense. and do so with an awareness on some level that you are saying and using weasel phrases when they are in the text. It will get easier.
2) Note the subject that you used earlier for doing some exercises with Weasel Phrases (exercise 4 above). Use different Phrases. Subject
. See if you can pick these out. Just read the SS material out loud. 4) Pick a subject in which you are interested. While doing it. and see if you can string things together so that they sound better. and then use one of the Weasel Phrases and the bring up another "aspect". 2) Get your SS audio materials and listen for some Weasel Phrases. see if you can use some or all of your favorite weasel phrases when talking about it.) Pick 4-5 different aspects of this "experience" that you will talk about. don't use that one!)
Now talk about one of these 4-5 aspects for 1-2 sentences. 5) Did that sound weird? Strange? Ok .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Exercises for Weasel Phrases 1) Get some of your written SS materials and look for some Weasel Phrases in the text. Try it again. etc. This is necessary to have the kind of words and subjects that lend themselves to Weasel Phrases. Talk about THAT one for a few sentences. Maybe pausing for a moment before one. the experience of it. Pick 3 of them that seem the most natural to you. that seem as if they fit best into your way of speaking about subjects that you may like. the subject might be "going to a ball game" (pick your own. (Weasel Phrases tend to provide ways to connect sentences and paragraphs that talk about how something is felt and experienced..
that you want them to experience. Make a point to "lean on it" a bit. and incorporate Weasel Phrases into the next several discussions you have about that subject as well. once. While doing it. on some level. saying one slowly. "see how fascinated" . allowing you to say more (and maybe more provocative things) about a subject. intrigued. Take a moment and try to emphasize them in some way.just general things that would cause a person to be interested in something. 4) Pick a topic that YOU are very interested in. To make it easy. when separated from the context. These are not to be sexual or suggestive. • Context . a place you have traveled. but just general things (feelings or states).It's not just about using one. after another. or experience while they are thinking about that subject.). instead "you like this" (car). Again not "you like that color". Two key aspects of the use of Embedded Commands are often overlooked. See if you can pick out embedded commands while listening. 2) Get your SS audio materials and listen for these. maybe pausing for a moment before one. Think of general statements. feel. maybe a car.. your job. and to "soften" the way in which something is said.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3) Select another subject that really interests you. things you would like a listener to think about.
. "get excited". Just say this stuff out loud. Maybe play one tape or CD. Write down things that would make someone interested.2. that you are saying and using embedded commands at the time. and where the person's emotions or feelings are somehow active (This "context" issue is discussed later in the product in great detail in Conversational Management sections. "get into it".4
Listen to an example where many of these are used. Pick something that excites you! Maybe the subject is sports. think of it like this. feelings. • Repetition . its about multiple usage (bombardment)!
Exercises for Embedded Commands 1) Get our your written SS materials (written) and look for embedded commands in a few pages of the text. or "you want this" (car). or feel a certain way. etc. 3) Take the written SS materials. and read some of this material out loud. "this is what you have imagined having for yourself. Like "feel excited". your car. These are small snippets of words and phrases which. etc. make note of the embedded commands. and do so with an awareness. lets say you were selling something to someone.
2.. Write down a list of embedded commands. issue a "command" or statement that instructs someone do something. or more quickly. excited by something. Subject
Strategic Formula for Weasel Phrases Use Weasel Phrases to keep the conversation going.It's very important that the command be brought up in the context of a conversation that is interesting.
See how natural you can make them sound. start using a few of these commands when speaking. see just how many of the embedded commands in that list that YOU can say! First. Write down a list of at least 5 commands that work well in that subject. Subject Embedded Commands
3) Practice the use of those commands.
Strategic Formula for Embedded Commands Use embedded commands repeatedly and in the proper context. or maybe it has to deal with your job. 2) Select another subject that is a part of your life. or school. 6) Do the same thing again. to create a compelling will on the part of the listener follow you and listen to you. 4) The next several times that subject comes up in your life. work on just saying them and finding a way to bring them up. pausing. but something where being influential may help. and with that list that YOU wrote in hand. and make it sound natural. out loud.
Assignments for Embedded Commands 1) Look at the list of Commands that you wrote and practiced that deal with a subject in which you are interested (exercise 4 above). but now focus more on "leaning" on the embedded commands a bit. just enough to put the emphasis on the command. in the context of talking about that subject. Maybe slowing down slightly. The next several times that you talk about that subject with anyone. Start to place some emphasis on the command itself.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
5) Start talking about that topic out loud. that would assist you in being more influential.
. make some effort to use some of these commands in the context of a real discussion. changing your voice. Maybe you work in sales. Maybe it's not a passion or real interest.
you are talking "about" a feeling or sensation. also "this" and "these" as in "this feeling" of "these feelings".5
Linking is a way to take the feelings. which is an ambiguous way of referencing what she is thinking about. etc. it's easier than you think! Just talking about a subject and getting her to be a part of the discussion. the linking tools and techniques will add to this. 2) Get your SS audio materials and listen for these. In some ways.2.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
2. on some level. and talking to you. If she is experiencing these feelings in your presence. Linking Phrases . See if you can pick out Linking Phrases while listening. she has to actually feel it to some extent. and inexact. You can also make reference to "in me". Take a moment and try to emphasize the linking in some way. emotions. etc. • In order for her to understand the feeling being discussed. you speak of "this feeling". then on some level that is creating this "link". Maybe play one tape or CD. non-specific. change in voice tone. and getting her to experience. and experiences that are being discussed and associate or "link" them to you. For example.While listening to the audio. recall. However. then to the deeper levels of her mind. while looking at you. if you are talking about a great feeling of excitement that a woman has had or is having. and read some of this material aloud. make note of where linking is taking place. see if you can add more phrases to the list below. as long as there is good rapport). While doing so. and make this "link" even more effective. you are being ambiguous. • • • • • • • Now with me In me In myself with this these this belief these feelings
Exercises for Linking 1) Get our your written SS materials (written) and look for examples of Linking in the text. and then making an ambiguous reference to that feeling using your words. What is this based upon? • When talking. 3) Take the written SS materials. you become more associated with those feelings. Just to "process" what is being discussed. Are you talking about the "feeling" she had at some time in the past? Are you talking about the feeling she is having right now? • Because you are using terms like "this". will "link" them to you.)
. she has to feel it on some level (and she will. which is ambiguous (non-exact). and feel emotions. "in myself. using some of the techniques that have been discussed in this course (pausing. when you say "this feeling". • However. The most common linking phrase/tool that guys think about is the phrase "now with me". "this interest". ALL of those possible definitions apply! Then.
Assignments for Linking No separate assignment for this.2. First. and using the list above. or change your voice. this will come to you much more easily. In some manner. This will sound easier for you as we go on. "these feelings". with me" after one of more of the commands in your list. As you hear more and more examples of this throughout the course. Maybe slow down slightly. Another example would be to take the phrase "Get excited" and turn that into "get excited by THESE things". it's much better if picked up along-the-way. where you listed "feel excited". You can even add the ever-popular "now.) For example. Start talking about that topic out loud. (Again. Plus the next section will make this much easier!
Strategic Formula for Linking After getting someone to experience good feelings and emotions. work on just saying them and finding a way to bring them up. pause.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course 4) Take the list of embedded commands that you created in an earlier exercise (Exercise #4 in section 2. just enough to put emphasis on the Linkage Phrase. link them to you so that YOU become something and someone that they feel good about.2. and see if you can "add" text to each to link them to you in some way. but now focus more on "leaning" a bit on the Linkage Phrases. A quick way of doing this is to simply add "this feeling". Embedded Command Linkage Phrase
5) Pick a topic that YOU are interested in as we did before (it can be the same one you used in Exercise #4 in section 2. see just how many of the Embedded Commands and Linkage Phrases that you can use in your dialog. etc.
. "this person or thing". 6) Now do the same thing again. the linking is ambiguous and doesn't reference you directly. That's ok.4). This may seem strange and sound a bit "off". you could say "feel excited by this" or "feel excited now" (you can also link things by putting in a reference to NOW). Doing linking in an exercise like this is difficult and hard to make it sound "natural". Write down the list of commands and an associated linkage phrase for each below.
that feeling • This sensation.Non-Possessive (seems to reference something "else" or something "away") Consider these and those. This is a new and very effective way to do linking that is easy to learn and master.Non-Possessive For example.Possessive • Those . with you.6
Easy-Linking (This. those feelings • These sensations. who cares? Well these are almost interchangeable! You can switch this/that in sentences as you wish. In this case. one "thing". this & that are singular • This . So. with "these" being the possessive form. that sensation They differ though in that "this" seems possessive. seductive feelings to you may be great but. Consider four words in the English language: • This • That • These • Those These are forms of pronouns. these and those are plural • These .2.Possessive (sort of "includes" something) • That . Given that one type is possessive. but that will be quite obvious when you try to do that). (In some cases. those sensations So. This means they are ambiguous! Consider this and that. For example. Whereas "that person" refers to someone "away" some "other" person who is not in the immediate area. exciting. they reference a "thing". "this person" tends to sound like the person that is there. so you are not using a name or specific reference. This and that tend to refer to singular items. and included. these refer to plural items. but do so in a general manner. Those)
Listen to an example where many of these are used. These. or not there at the time. use the possessive form when saying or talking about ANYTHING POSITIVE and use the non-possessive form when saying anything negative!
. So. that direction • This feeling. in general. • This person.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
2. for that multiple-instance bombardment that we spoke of before! The idea of linking wild. and one is not. and it can be done a LOT. a GREAT strategy is to link anything and everything positive to you (and link negative things away from yourself. there are times when they cannot be switched. and "that" is not. that person • This direction. those people • These directions. That. those directions • These feelings. • These people.
These. This is good. write a small sentence for each. These. Small sentence that includes that attribute. Write down (below) ten attributes. using the correct versions of That.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course • • • • This That These Those Singular possessive Singular non-possessive Plural possessive Plural non-possessive Anything Anything Anything Anything Positive Negative Positive Negative
You can learn to do this (to choose which of these words to use) in real-time through training!
Tactical Formula for Easy-Linking Use "This" and "These" when referring to anything positive. Those people are not.
Exercises for Easy-Linking 1) Say the lines below. and those depending on whether the item is positive or negative. Those are not. That person is not. That. That. Use "That" and "Those" when referring to anything negative. or singular/plural. For each of these attributes or things. These are good. Those
. This person is good. That is not. out loud. These people are good. for a good ten minutes. for a good ten minutes. you have discussed a subject (and written a lot of text about it) that is important to you. out loud.
3) Earlier in the workbook. Subject: Attributes or "things about" that subject. 2) Say the lines below. or "things about" that subject. and the correct form of This.
These. Great speakers use movement to their advantage.
2. Anchoring Anchoring is associating a feeling or emotional state to a sensory experience. That. 5) Pick another subject. D4-T13
. and the correct form of This. Those
6) Talk out loud about the subject mentioned above for a good 5-10 minutes. These. and Those. beyond the small bits and pieces of language. and use as many of the sentences (above) as you can while talking. and then write a small sentence for each.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
4) Talk out loud about that subject for a good 5-10 minutes.3
Now we are getting into a different area. These sections help to train you in these types of techniques. Subject: Attributes or "things about" that subject. list ten attributes or things about that subject. Small sentence that includes that attribute. and once again. using the appropriate form of This. That. and use as many of the sentences (above) as you can while talking. and their movement becomes a part of their communication.
and that are very very easy to do. political speaker.3. make note of where your hands are when speaking. towards. and then we can work on deliberate movement such as • Pointing towards and away from things • Towards yourself and away from yourself
Exercises for Pointing and Gestures 1) Find a good speaker on TV. talking about a subject that YOU are interested in. Then later on see if you can start to become aware of what your hands are doing WHILE you are in the conversation. and that you end up talking about with people quite often. and that you are passionate about. 2. so these techniques discussed here will help. However we will focus on things that can create a LOT of effectiveness. embedded commands. maybe a motivational speaker. How often are they in your pockets? How often do they just lie by your side and never move? Make note of this after-the-fact. to help make their point. point up. We will break down many of the component parts of this into skills that we will teach you bit by bit. Read some of that text (from an earlier exercise) out loud. etc. Use your hands to accentuate certain points.
Assignments for Pointing and Gestures 1) For the next few days. or even a preacher. Watch how they move. and away from yourself. How to • • • do this: Get your hands out of your pockets. etc. etc). Move!
We will start by generating SOME movement. BE excited! Use your hands and arms for emphasis. passionate.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Many different types of anchoring can be done and we are only going to cover some very basic tools. Subjects
. have energy. 2) List 3 subjects that you really enjoy. Most guys are too boring and too reserved when talking. and to do multiple times. so that the use of these becomes automatic. Don't flail about wildly. down. and hopefully the conversations are interesting. They may be a bit over-the-top (speaking to an audience is different than speaking one-on-one) but just watch them for a while. Pick something YOU are interested in. Get your hands OUT of your pockets and AWAY from your body! Act excited. and some gestures. 2) Get one of the text lists from an earlier exercise (weasel phrases. after the conversation has ended. and way from your sides.1 Pointing and Gestures D4-T14
Good speakers use their hands.
Small sentence that includes that attribute. and use as many of the sentences (above) as you can while talking. and once again. These sections help to train you in these types of techniques. Great speakers use movement to their advantage. Those
6) Talk out loud about the subject mentioned above for a good 5-10 minutes.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
4) Talk out loud about that subject for a good 5-10 minutes. beyond the small bits and pieces of language. That. 5) Pick another subject. These.
. list ten attributes or things about that subject. Anchoring Anchoring is associating a feeling or emotional state to a sensory experience. These. and their movement becomes a part of their communication. and Those. and use as many of the sentences (above) as you can while talking. That. and then write a small sentence for each. and the correct form of This. using the appropriate form of This. Subject: Attributes or "things about" that subject.3
Now we are getting into a different area.
many people move when talking This technique is most powerful when used at a time when emotions and/or imagination are engaged in the conversation. and others. Read that out loud. and MOVE! Do this out loud. or • You can place your hand on your chest or abdomen in a subtle manner (to link things to you) . This technique allows you to do this many many times. and the repetition works for you! • Can do in various contexts. point or gesture away. Whenever you say something positive.). and accentuate what you are saying in order to be more compelling as a speaker and to get even more attention from your listener or audience. just start to MOVE. Bad.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course For each of these subjects.
Strategic Formula for Pointing and Gestures Move. Good. very easily. and send Negative things away • You can point towards or away from yourself. Do something. recall a recent time when you had such a discussion. gesture. point towards yourself. point away.2
Linking Gestures (Towards And Away)
This is a fast and easy way to link positive states to you.) 2) Grab some of your written SS materials. and AWAY from your sides and MOVE when talking about these subjects. but this time use your hands..
Exercises for Linking Gestures 1) Stand up. Bad (gesture towards. etc.
Tactical Formula for Linking Gestures Whenever you say something negative. As you get more comfortable with this. make a point to get your hands OUT of your pockets. etc. • Or hold your hand away from yourself (to send things "away") How to use it • Good to do in the context of being a person that already MOVES when talking! • Make this subtle. or at least be able to move. Bring Positive things toward yourself. and MOVE.. gesture. away. towards.3. no need to WILDLY gesture! • You can do this many many times. ANYTHING.
. point or gesture towards yourself. 3) With these three subjects in mind.
2. and animate to some extent the next time you talk about them. motion. Say the following out loud while gesturing in the correct direction: Good. and every time something positive is being talked about. and to send negative things "away" from yourself. Do your best to re-enact that discussion (say what you said. arms. and when anything negative is mentioned. make a note to go ahead and move. away.
Conversely. and MOVE. When you say These or Those. Say "that". These. point towards yourself and when anything negative is mentioned. etc. For each of these subjects. make a note to go ahead and use these Linking Gestures to some extent the next time you talk about them. or at least sit where you can move. etc. 2) With these three subjects in mind. Do the following out loud:
. points towards yourself. Point away Positive statement. Point to you Negative statement.
Assignments for Linking Gestures 1) List 3 subjects that you really enjoy. Point away.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3) Remember the text we used in an earlier example here in the workbook? Read that out loud.
Exercises for Easy Linking Expanded 1) Stand up. Say "this". That. Start subtle. That. (yes. Use "This. have energy. Those . Subjects
Do your best to re-enact that discussion. but this time when you are speaking of anything good or positive.3
Easy Linking Expanded (Pointing With This.
2. but you don't have to do it every time! That will seem strange!
Tactical Formula for Easy Linking Expanded Positive statement. Pick something that YOU are interested in. Say "these".)
Now we bring together Linking Gestures and Easy Linking. recall a recent time when you had such a discussion. Linking Gestures and Easy-Linking together: • • • Use the pointing/gestures on Positive and Negative things (point towards and away). and every time something positive is being talked about. when anything negative is mentioned. Do this out loud.. Those" correctly Combine these and use them at the same time!
When you say This or These. point away. start with a few. These. This is veryeasy to do over and over for that repetitive effect. Point to you Negative Say "those". point away.. passionate. it will become easier and easier. these can be the same as the last set of assignments). and hopefully the conversations are interesting. say what you said. and that you end up talking about with people quite often.3. motion away or place your hands/arms away. gesture towards yourself or place your hand(s) on yourself.
Practice it enough and in connection with earlier exercises. it will become automatic.. and able to be done many many times. it's very useful to Anchor anything and everything positive to you! In some ways. it's good to be close enough (within arms-length) so that the "touch" is easy to do. and say "this". The more that "emotions" are being accessed.Point or Touch. a laugh. specific states. That. a realization. These. Point away. touch them This is best done in a "moment" with some emotion. and thoughts to you but in a general sense. but actually. and Those.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Point to yourself. These. and Those if you can.
Strategic Formula for Easy Linking Expanded Combine the use of Linking Gestures (towards yourself when positive. If you are head-on directly in front of a person. etc. Use the correct versions of This. Point back to yourself and say "these".
. Point away and say "those" Repeat! This WILL help to train you! 2) Remember the text we used in an earlier example? Speak that text out loud. or when the person you are talking to goes into a Positive state. an expression. it's more difficult. Also. while pointing towards or away from yourself in the correct manner. On Positive
Let's look at anchoring in light of the 80/20 rule (where 80% of the results come from 20% of the effort). That. and emotions to yourself. and say "that".
2. touch them • they smile.4
Easy Anchoring . Can we apply this to anchoring? Yes! • We need a way to do some basic anchoring that is very simple. and away when negative. touch them! This "Easy Anchoring" works in any context: • they laugh. touch them • they seem to go into a pleasant state. It may be good to anchor feelings.3. states. But to get even more effectiveness when anything positive happens. you are anchoring them in a subtle way.) with Easy Linking (using This. trying to add in more instances of This. These.. we are doing that already by pointing "towards" on positive things and "away" on negative things using Linking. Those in the correct ways) to associate even more positive feelings. the more effective it tends to be. That. This is more easily done if you are standing at the side or at an angle. Do this in a way that maybe makes it seem like you are doing it for emphasis.
• Think about when you greet a friend. and the situation or topic being discussed. maybe someone who you have heard about). 2) Spend some time looking for moments (positive ones) where a touch would be appropriate. touch them to help anchor it to you. See if you can recall how it was. What do you do? You shake their hand. but yet have some degree of rapport already (maybe this is a friend-of-a-friend. also make a point to make and maintain eye contact as well. a smile. without really thinking about it. such as. just a touch..
Assignments for Easy Anchoring 1) The next several times you shake someone's hand. intrigue. interest.. This is the same type of thing. directly to you.. vividly. Also note the degree of eye contact. you grab their upper arm as well. or Topic being discussed
2) Recall those 5 times. Write those down. • When joking with someone. etc. maybe pat on the back. but in many cases.
Exercises for Easy Anchoring 1) Think about the last 5 times where you touched someone in this type of way. laugh. Person '" Situation. • Think about when you meet and are introduced to someone. A laugh A moment of recognition or realization When someone starts talking quietly. and note to yourself the correlation between how long the touch lasted and the level of rapport. make a point to hold it just slightly longer than usual. but a bit more "deliberate".Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
You probably do this already in certain situations.
Tactical Formula for Easy Anchoring When the person you are talking with displays a positive feeling of some type. (Not romantically. you just touch his or her upper arm or upper back.) Maybe a handshake Maybe a pat on the back Maybe a funny gesture Make a note of the person.
think "I could have touched them THEN". that a touch is appropriate. That. o Embedded Commands • Can you do this now. Chest o Pacing And Pausing
• Slow. o Linking " with me.. Then.. That. Fast
• Pause o Energy And Enthusiasm • Passionate or Boring? LANGUAGE TOOLS AND DETAILS o Adjectives And Adverbs • Be descriptive o Trance Words • Instantaneously. These. we want you to actually DO IT! So. Find Yourself o Weasel Phrases • If I were to . maybe you don't touch them. • SPEAKING POINTERS o The "Cool" Factor • You don't have to be cold. Those
. language. see if you can have at least 5 instances of knowing. Suddenly.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
At first. and you have already learned a LOT of the detailed speaking.. You are noticing this after-the-fact. and movement skills that will be used later in the course. o Easy-Linking • This. Those MORE TOOLS o Pointing And Gestures • Move! Point! o Linking Gestures • Towards And Away o Easy Linking Expanded • Pointing With This. Mouth. These... anchoring and associating yourself to positive and intriguing feelings in other people helps to make them feel positive towards and intrigued by you.
2. when you have the chance. 3) Now that you have started to notice these "moments" where a touch would be appropriate. DO IT!
Strategic Formula for Easy Anchoring In general.4
We are well on our way. but as you notice these moments. in-the-moment. to be cool o Voice Tone And Tonality • Nose.
we will move onwards to work on Language Structures.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Easy Anchoring • Point Or Touch On Positive And Negative
With these parts behind you. and later to Conversational Management techniques.
or "bigger chucks" as we say. but you need a lot of power to do it and you risk breaking rapport. however you can break rapport. the sort of things that you need to get used to doing automatically. then and give them another way of looking at it. or to try to "impress" them. 3.. move them . These were tactical details. be able to just "do". move with them conversationally for a while. into higher-level stuff.. acknowledge what the other person is saying. Fast and abrupt changes . Agree or not agree? . but you can break rapport in the process. Changing the Viewpoint or Frame if Mind .A way to change directions • In someone's way of thinking • In the conversation To make a change in direction in some manner. etc. say things such as.. and then take them in some direction. You almost NEVER impress people that way! To pace/lead well. o That's one way to see it o I understand your point
.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3. incorrect. you might bring up a new way of looking at it. towards where you want things to go.. but will hopefully at some point.Some people try to display higher knowledge or value by "arguing". Don't argue! . Are they useful and possible? • • • Trying to knock or jar someone into a different direction or way of thinking can be risky.Some people misunderstand and think that to "Pace" means to "agree".. telling someone they are wrong.Can you just abruptly jerk a conversation towards where you want it to go? Maybe. Changing Topics and Subjects .
Pace and Lead allows us to "join" someone. You might disagree.0
LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES
D5-T1 We have been working on bits and pieces of language.Can you just knock someone into agreeing with you? Can you be that bold? Yes. For example.1 PACE AND LEAD D5-T2
Pace and Lead .. To "Pace" means to just BE a part of the conversation.. and more influential in general. show understanding (does not have to be agreement necessarily) and then . but agreeing is just a special case.. You MAY be able to do that. The minute you do anything like that to get someone else's "approval". It can mean this. you are lost. These techniques give you ways to use and arrive at languaging in a manner that will make you more persuasive. Challenges • Can't you just bluntly offer a different view? Yes. Now we are moving "up" a level. it's best to meet or join someone in some way. things that you should not even have to really "think about". you might make comments (some that agree and some that may not) but the key is that you are "Taking part in" the conversation and topics at hand. all of the time. but you must do so powerfully and do NOT look for "acceptance".
That hardly ever works... To TRY to IMPRESS is bad.
Impressing someone with your knowledge... as if you "need" their approval. Let me make sure I understand . the implication is that you NEED someone's approval. understanding.. The point here is not to memorize these "lines".. what you are saying is . showing that you are a part of it. or.. acknowledgement... Then start to move or shift things in a different way. allowing you to move things more in your favor later on. Maybe • • • • • • continue showing an understanding or interest So what you mean is ...
Tactical Formula for Pacing and Leading Show agreement. if you attempt to do that. • Well. . I read/saw/heard the same thing . So if I understand this . and some of then want to go out and "impress" people with their newfound knowledge.it's like this..
Then start to direct things in a different way .
3. Arguing! Many smart guys study these techniques and technologies.BE IMPRESSIVE! People really don't like to be proven dumb or wrong! Most people are offended or "put off by such attempts. • Alright. I see • That's interesting • I get it • Hmmmmm ....... a way that you want. In addition...) • Yes.. Instead . it makes YOU look bad....1
General Pace and Lead Techniques
Here are some examples of ways to do these steps with example wording for each. I get it.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
That's interesting I see what you are saying.
Strategic Formula for Pacing and Leading Pacing and Leading allows you "be" in the conversation for a while and gain rapport and information. Let them know you are listening and understand (using wording such as shown below. • Ok . So.. and/or interest... have you thought about this . but to really get a sense of being IN the conversation.
..1.. Ok. I also think you can see . and then moving things forward in some manner.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
I hear you, and what else is interesting is .... •-. That's a good way of looking at it, something else that is important is ....
The Formula for Pacing and Leading is ... acknowledge and then start to shift things ... Maybe you want to shift things more and/or bring up another issue or viewpoint entirely (or maybe you actually disagree) • That's one way of looking at it, however I think ... • Yes, I understand, I have also heard ... • Ok, that makes sense, another way of thinking about it is .. • Alright, but on the other hand... Some general methods you can use to introduce the "leading" aspect, you can talk about... • What you know, believe, understand • What a friend or colleague has said • What you heard • What you read • etc. 3.1.2 Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects D5-T12
Lets say you find some people talking about a topic. Do you walk up, interrupt, and start an entirely new topic? No. (Well, you can, but that takes a lot of power and has a lot of risk.) A better way is to enter the conversation, talk about it (Pace), and then move the conversation into areas that you want it to go (Lead). Examples: • You are in a conversation and the topic is cars. People are talking about prices, loans, etc. You acknowledge what is being said, contribute to that conversation (pace), and then start to bring in the idea of how a car handles, how it feels, and how exciting it is to drive certain cars (lead). • People are discussing clothes, various brands, types, etc. You talk about that with them (pace) for a while, and then start to bring up the idea of how clothes make you feel, how you feel differently when wearing different things ... etc (lead)
Tactical Formula for Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects Show agreement, understanding, acknowledgement, and/or interest in the topic or subject. Then start to move or shift topic or subject in a different way, a way that you want.
Exercises for Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects 1) Think about some recent conversations you have had with people about different topics, hopefully these conversations and/or this topic is something that occurs a lot for you (based on interests you have, people you know, etc). Recall a specific "moment" in each conversation. Note what was being discussed, and what point was being talked about. Make a note of each of them. Also note, where did that actual conversation go next?
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course What were you talking about in this "moment"?
Conversation with whom?
Where did it go next?
2) Pace and Lead Gently Out loud, practice as if you were talking in each of the discussions above, and paced the conversation and topic, and then lead it in some direction. In this exercise, simply show agreement, understanding, and/or interest, and then lead in the same general direction. Maybe bring up a new example, new point, new issue, but just sort of "take over" the conversation. 3) Pace and Lead in a New Direction Next, for each of those instances, provide an example where you show agreement, understanding, and/or interest, but now start to "move" things in a new direction. Maybe the conversation that you had started at this one "point" and went in a specific direction ... Now, for this exercise, practice taking it in a new and different direction. Maybe introduce a different aspect of the topic or subject, something not mentioned before, or not normally talked about. The key is to first show agreement, understanding, and/or interest and THEN do this "shift", and you LEAD things in a different way.
Assignments for Pace and Lead - Topics and Subjects 1) Make note of three conversations that you tend to have with people on a regular basis. Person or People Subjects we discuss
2) The next times these conversations happen, make a point to "Show agreement, understanding, and/or interest" (Pace). Then "Then start to move things" (Lead) in your own way, Do this by introducing a different aspect of that topic, or a related topic/subject. Don't make this shift or change really abrupt or different, just make a point to sort of "direct" where things move, even if that direction is close to where it was going anyway. Just make sure YOU are the one that moves it. Note the text and examples given earlier as a way to do that. 3) Once you can do the above, now make a point to have your "Lead" incorporate a real change of some type.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Normally, even without your input, the conversation tends to go in a certain way. The earlier exercise had you just keep thing moving in that same direction. Now you are to "take" the conversation somewhere else towards a different or related topic. Just introduce a new aspect of the topic, a different thing, a different direction, so that you are really "leading" where things go. Remember the language that you were shown earlier. Use languaging like... You know what ELSE is interesting You know what * l * have found (seen, felt) Another way of doing this would be .. You know what ELSE can happen ... is ...
Pace and Lead-Mindset or Frame of Mind
You can change the way people look at things, their mindset, and their "frame of mind". For example, imagine you are having a discussion and people are talking in a certain "frame of mind" (not directly, it's just their way of seeing things). The point here is to acknowledge that frame, and then introduce another way of seeing things, another "frame", or another "mindset". What is • • • • a "frame"? In general it's ... A way someone "sees" something. What it "means" to them. The way they "feel" about it. The significance or meaning that it has.
Looking at the formula for Pace and Lead, you apply that by first acknowledging the current Frame, and then start to lead by bringing up another way of thinking about it and/or looking at it. You bring a new "frame" into the discussion. (This is a way of shifting that way people LOOK at things, the significance that it has, or their mindset regarding certain topics or behaviours). In the earlier example of Pacing and Leading of Topics and Subjects, we were talking just about a thing, a topic, or subject. Now we are talking about a feeling, or the way things are "seen" or what they "mean". For example, people may be talking about: • Taking risks • Feeling good or bad • Having a good day or a bad day • Making choices • What an event "meant" to them • How someone else actions affected them • How a decision affected them. There is a "frame" (of mind) behind each of these discussions and with proper technique, that frame and mindset may be changed. Look back at the "Methods" section earlier for some details and examples of how to introduce this pacing and leading (there are some lists of languaging examples provided). Examples: • You enter a conversation where people are talking about risks, Risks at work, risks in finances, risks in life. You Pace by discussing this for a while. The frame or mindset here is that risks are bad, dangerous,
a new meaning. (Risk was framed as dangerous. and paced it. What it "means" to them.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
have consequences. and then lead it in some direction.
Exercises for Pace and Lead . weight..Mindset or Frame of Mind Show agreement. The frame here is that she has her "standards" and that this is good for her. and the "frame" that was in use. Again. and/or interest in the Mindset or Frame of mind. Do this OUT LOUD.)
Tactical Formula for Pace and Lead . Then you start to lead by bringing up the idea that some risks are fun and interesting. etc). who is like 5 lbs overweight. In this exercise simply Show agreement. Towards a way that you want. the frame of mind or mindset is the focus here.. Recall a specific "moment" in the conversation. understanding..
. With whom? Topic? Mindset / Frame of Mind
2) Pace and Lead Gently Practice as if you were talking in that discussion. what point was being talked about.. where the point of the discussion in that moment was: The way they "see" something. or may be perfect but with the wrong hair color (lead). now its being framed as exciting).. What was the "frame". looks for more. and/or interest in the mindset or frame of mind . Then start to move or shift the frame by introducing another way of looking at things.. The way they "feel" about it. understanding. and what "kind" of man she likes (height. or provide a relevant example. and you are working to change the way she screens out guys. The frame you are bring up is how superficial it is to judge based on numbers and details. some risks have good rewards.Mindset or Frame of Mind 1) Think about some recent conversations you have had with people about different topics.. the people. Make a note of each of them. some risks make you feel alive. and how anyone of quality . • Another conversation has a woman talking about what she looks for in men.. etc. some men will just "write off a woman that is a certain size. the assumption? What is the frame of mind behind the viewpoints that they had? Write down the topic. she talks about what their professions are. then lead in the same general direction. (You are shifting her frame so that she may start to look at different things in men. Maybe bring up a similar way of looking at it. the viewpoint. then start to move into talking about how men do this as well.. Note what was being discussed. acknowledgement. etc. You agree on some level (pace) and chat about that. Just sort of "take over" the conversation.
and they are the one not taking risks someone is prejudiced or judges other people.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
3) Pace and Lead in a New Direction Next.Mindset or Frame of Mind 1) Make note of three conversations that you tend to have with people on a regular basis. and THEN do this "shift". These should be of a type where THE "frame" or mindset is something of which you are aware. understanding. Think about discussions where YOU can see that these people involved are working on a certain set of assumptions. Maybe acknowledge and then bring up an opposing view. for each of those instances. and maybe point out a similar example from your own life. Do this OUT LOUD for each example. and makes assumptions (has a certain frame) about people or groups. Maybe bring up a way of looking at things that is totally different. and HE is the one with the limitation someone complains about work and the managers. and their motivations
etc. etc someone looks at a political issue. and you LEAD things in a different way. A good way to do it is to show agreement and understanding. you are just acknowledging the Mindset or Frame in this example. or something someone said.
Assignments for Pace and Lead . a frame of reference. Examples: someone complains a lot. even if that direction is close to where it was going anyway. understanding. but really his mindset is the problem someone talks about wanting something different. but just make a point to sort of "direct" where things move. and the frame associated with each.
Write down these subjects. Do this by introducing a "way of looking at it" that is similar to the one that is already being used. and/or interest" (Pace). Maybe bring up a different viewpoint or way of looking at it. understanding. Don't make this really abrupt or different. Then "start to move things" (Lead) in your own way. The key is to first Show agreement. and/or interest.
. provide an example where you Show agreement. Basically. to find a positive way of looking at the situation. With whom? Subject/Topic? Mindset / Frame of Mind
2) Pace and Lead Gently The next times these conversations happen. and/or interest in the Mindset or Frame of Mind but now start to "move" things in a new direction. some way. make a point to "Show agreement. what it "means" that is not really in agreement with what was said. Maybe find a way. or something you heard or read. and says they are cheap. maybe even limiting beliefs or beliefs that really hold them back.
another way of looking at it is .. A friend of mine used to feel the same way and they. and then use that to lead someone somewhere... Continue to Pace by maybe stating an obvious point about their current reality o seeing XYZ o feeling XYZ o thinking about XYZ o etc. o As you feel..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3) Pace and Lead In a New Direction Once you can do the above. and allow the conversation to continue with the same frame of mind in place. What is done here is that you Pace based on something that is obvious (obvious in their "current reality").. o While you see . o While you are . A "safe" way to do this would be to find a positive way to look at the situation. (for example.. a new mindset. or used by very powerful speakers. Again. using words such as) o As you are . Well.
3. it could be . but just find a positive way to look at what is being discussed. o You are probably wondering
. Now you are to "take" the conversation somewhere else and bring up a new mindset or frame of mind... now make a point to have your "Lead" incorporate a real change of some type. Meaning.... Just introduce a new frame. "Pace" their mindset.. o etc. there was a certain "frame" being discussed... • At least it's not like XYZ... even without your input..... You know.. point towards a specific Mindset or Frame that is of YOUR choosing. or assumed by the people involved. Some ways to do that is by saying things such as.. This is a small-chunk detail and technique.... but it can work well and adds to the power of the languaging.. This may be different from the way the subject or belief WAS framed or thought of. o While you think . a new aspect of "what it means". o After you have . o While you are . The earlier exercise had you just sort of "run" with that. these techniques are used a LOT. o As you see . and new way of looking at things. focus on the Mindset or Frame.. The general way to approach this is: • Start by pacing something that is obvious about their current reality ...1.. o As you realize . it might not be that bad...4
Pace and Lead . and/or express what is on their mind..Current Reality
If you look at the languaging used in things like hypnosis.
...2 GIVE THEM A REASON D5-T32
Give someone a reason for someone to listen . what you are hearing.".Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
o As you are thinking about o I know you are concerned about o The issue that may be on your mind is o The question you may have is Begin to lead ..Current Reality As (while ) you) are "X" (Pace) Where "X" is something that is true in their current reality (perceptions.Pacing Reality too much can seem arrogant. • You are talking to someone at work ...... and do. it starts to become annoying to the listener. thoughts.." • Physical demos use this a lot.. etc." • You will hear a LOT of this in this course (which is part of your re-programming!)
Tactical Formula for Pace and Lead ... the more it will "sink in"..... "as you are watching this presentation . what you are reading. Make note of how many times I have paced your current reality... Rewind or go back a few tracks...) • Then you will "Y" Where "Y" is something you want them to experience (Lead)
Exercises for Pace and Lead . "As you feel this.
. o you will start to notice o you may realize o you may start to think o you may see how .... then you are probably wondering . 3. o state what you want them to see/feel/hear/realize
Examples: • As you are listening to this program .. and "As that feeling builds. o notice what its like as . Point them to where you want to lead them .. what you are thinking.. you will begin to notice this . If you spend too much time saying things similar to "I know what you are thinking". The more you hear this...
Warning .. Studies have been done with persuasive language that show that giving a reason will make people more apt to do things for you and agree with you.Current Reality 1) Listen to this section again. o another thing you will see/feel/notice is .. o you will then . Really pay attention and see how many times I have done pacing and leading in this manner.
However. they may go with you. then it may be difficult to get people to agree. "hey. just providing a reason. asking "can I pay by credit card". Write these down. you don't need to be concerned about these things. because I am really in a hurry" then. the addition of this small "reason" will make people much more agreeable and apt to let you do what you would like. • You are talking to someone and you would like to pull her aside and make the conversation more private. If you just say. but put in a reason of some type. "Is it ok if I make copies next". Write these down. If you say. Examples: • You walk up to a copier at work and there are three people in line. come up with another reason. However. if you say "Let's move over there because it's more quiet" you will be amazed at how much more agreeable the person may be. It could be asking for coffee. if you say "Is it ok if I make copies next.
Tactical Formula for Give Them a Reason Request X because (of) Y
Exercises for Give Them a Reason 1) Make note of the last five times you asked someone for something. lets move over there".Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Don't worry about "losing your power" or being too "nice". anything.
. requesting something. This technique does not provide a 100% guarantee. remarkably.
Assignments for Give Them A Reason 1) Make note of five routine situations that you have in your life where you are asking for something. You are not being apologetic or anything. and out loud. The examples will be better if these are people you do not know. Person What did you ask for?
2) Practice out loud how you might "ask" for that favor or make that request again. or at least people that are not close friends of yours. 3) Go through the same list again. or asked someone to do something. it just helps to make people more agreeable (and there are statistics to support that as well).
go ahead and mention the "reason". just as an example) • Hypnotists use this technique a LOT. People) What do you ask for?
2) Practice out loud some "reasons" that you could give in these situations. statement. the items that you will "list" need to be brief points. • This is somewhat similar to a "pace and lead". "List" several things or examples which support your point. • Training for sales people use this quite a bit.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Situation (Place.Repetition in a way that serves you.1 General Listing D6-T4
Strategic Formula for General Listing General Listing is a way to quickly provide several reasons. Power in Numbers .3.3
Listen to an example where many of these are used. actually ends up being several points. • When you give a reason. See if you can make it automatic. in order to provide more power to what you are saying. and quite well.
. it's difficult to debate them all or object to them all (not to be combative.
3. and flow easily. you get someone to agree and then lead them 3. which support your point. provide several. 3) The next times these situations come up in your day-to-day life. or giving an example. point. • For the sake of a conversation. or make a statement. This technique has been developed based on observing how many good and influential people speak: • Successful sales people • Charismatic speakers • Good debaters • Component of hypnotic languaging « Very important. • When you give several reasons at once. so that your one "opportunity" in a conversation to make "a" point. or excuse. or make a point. don't just provide one reason.
Tactical Formula for General Listing When making a point.
. and still." and mention those three different ways. Z". where each lasts several minutes.. Write them down. Pick three ways that can go .2. Something you are interested in. write down who it was with. what are three ways that can go? Good? Bad? Indifferent? Exciting? Boring? Pick three and write these down What are three "ways" that the experience of "meeting people" can go?
2) Now practice out loud by saying something like "Isn't it interesting how you can meet people and it happens in different ways? I mean sometimes . you may begin to agree. maybe watching sports. Who you were talking to
. maybe trying to convince someone of something (NOT an argument-just that you were making a point and would like to be more persuasive).. and maybe 3 different things that support your "point". Activity that you like or do often List a particular part of aspect of that activity What are three "ways" that can go? "
4) Now describe "What its like to do your activity .each of which lasts just a few seconds. etc. Then. a. and somewhat new (3). but instead you talk ' about each for a few moments. Y.. Listing can be short. Select a particular aspect of that activity. but as you listen to it (1). 3) Pick an example of an activity that you do often. listing is like pacing and leading.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Example (see the listed items shown as 1. make them brief. Do that out loud. and the types of things to which no one would object. doing some type of work... For each conversation. etc. briefly. 5) Think of three recent conversations you have had with people where you were making a point. really recall listing to good speakers (2).. playing a game.. Now.. partying. In many ways. Now try again by expounding on each of the items... Mention the first item.) • I know this may sound a bit different (1). and start to think about in a positive way (3).. Each of the items in a list can also be much longer. Maybe your first two items in a list are obvious.
Exercises for General Listing 1) Lets say you are talking to someone about "Meeting people". strange (2). Y. then the second. true.X and then other times . Z (selecting your items listed above). the third item may tend to "lead" someone in some way. and/or what it's like to meet people. talk about it for a sentence or two. as in saying three items . what point you were trying to make. so that you don't just say "X.. as a list. sometimes . etc. 3.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Point you were trying to make Three items that support your "point"
b. a table. Who you were talking to Point you were trying to make Three items that support your "point"
6) Recall a specific moment in each conversation. Now practice. we were talking about three points in a list that all were similar. and an elephant) what tends to "stick" in your mind? (The Elephant!) The last item! By hanging an item at the end of a list. Here is a way to think about it.3. it's easy to think of that
. and tends to make THAT point the most important one. suggestion. the one that comes to mind the easiest is the one that YOU want someone to agree with. or different types of alternatives (to a thought. it sticks in the listener's head more. Therefore.
Listing . how you could bring up these three points in a list-like manner. the other. You weren't trying to emphasize one point vs. it makes it seem as if you are being fair. However. However. Placing that particular item at the end of a list can have that effect. out loud. Do that for each of the three examples above. you put more emphasis on it. activity. Maybe you want your list to contain many options.At The End
If several items are mentioned in a list (for example a car. at times you want to use listing as a way to highlight or focus upon one item. etc) By doing that. and just providing a series of options. you were just listing several things in a list. In the earlier Listing examples. Who you were talking to Point you were trying to make Three items that support your "point"
c. by placing YOUR preferred item at the end. Maybe you want to list several options or examples. Normally.
but by placing "it could be fun" last. how they can almost become a blur. you know that those people are NOT qualified (1) o Others you maybe have thought were ok at first. o May be frustrating to you.. and there is just something about this person. this is one of those subtle but very powerful things that many persuasive speakers do a LOT. It's interesting though. interesting. you just know . lets say you are talking about doing some activity. Again.. or this person presents himself really well (b). or it could really be fun. This course. or instances FIRST. It may be because you like the resume (a). you just really click and you feel this connection .. you put more emphasis on it and it tends to make that one "stick" more. maybe it's boring... I mean.. o It could suck. o You know what it's like when you meet someone . See? Not only did I have a list of three (1. I know. or maybe you are really seeing the power of all of this! I think you can tell which option I was going for! Meeting People. Again let's bring up this example of "meeting people"..
. was said that at the end? By the way. Examples • • Fun activity.. the more convinced you are that that person is NOT the one! o Hopefully though. did you notice the use of the words this/that/these/those? Also where do you think I might have been pointing and gesturing during those examples? Job interview o Have you talked to many candidates? Yes. and the third one "eventually find this person" was the one I wanted to really "stick".. but even when describing that person.. I put another list within THAT description (a.. right away.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
one. Sometimes there is nothing special.. or they just have the right answers (c). but you spend some time with that person (2) and the more that person talks. you meet someone. and then finish with YOUR preferred item. o And other times . When I have interviewed a lot of people. I have had to do that myself at times... it could be boring.A t The End Listing at The End is a way to provide several options (which may differ) but to emphasize the option that YOU want. they sort of fell into several groups o There are some people that.that is the one (3). those people doesn't mean much either way . 3). In general.. examples. Say that one LAST and bring up two other options. They are not all the same. o Other times you get that sort of a "friend" vibe with that person. you eventually find this person that on some level.2. It's just a matter of getting to this person. b. they are nice. you know? See how I did that? See how the item which I really wanted them to think about. one after another. Now those are different ways of seeing it. etc . c)!
Strategic Formula for Listing . you know ..
At The End 1) Lets say you are going to spend a day or evening with some friends. statement. etc. is the item you mention LAST. and seem too direct. In that case. it can be TOO obvious. talk about the issue.Let say you arc trying to get someone to buy something. Examples: • Sales . buy some thing. List three possible things that you could do and write these down.. and bring up at least two other "options" BEFORE you mention the one option that you want.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Tactical Formula for Listing . mentioning all of these in a list. Go ahead and suggest that item. make sure that the one that YOU want to do. and they are haggling or objecting a bit. Maybe add a small "list" within that last item (because it's inexpensive. placing something at the end can add to its power and make it stand out. or giving an example. You may want to "test" to see how the person will react to it.. LAST. Here is a way to think about it. 4) What is an example from your life (recently). Maybe add an embedded command of some type. "List" several things briefly in order. agree to some point. where you are trying to convince people to do something. it makes sense to "bury" that item in the middle of a list. You want to mention or suggest something that is quite strong. out loud. etc.3. maybe controversial. Three things that you and your friends could do (activity)
2) Practice. 3) Do that again.? Write down what the "issue" is. and you are all figuring out how you are going to spend your time. close. However. Maybe you want to suggest something very direct or quite controversial and you do NOT want to give it too much prominence. but bury it inside a list.At The End When making a point.
Exercises for Listing .3
Listing . If you say
. and we always have fun . out loud.Burying Items
When using a List. and what the result is that YOU want. Issue or Option What do you want?
5) Now. At times however. but place some more emphasis on that last item. Maybe pause when saying it.
3. go somewhere.). and therefore you do NOT want it to stick out too much. but mention the one which YOU want to put the most emphasis on.
it seems too obvious.Burying Items Listing . bury it inside a list. and maybe there is a possibility of you even spending that night together.. or maybe I'll call you tomorrow". Lets say your idea is so controversial and over-the-top.Lets say you have met a women at a party. For example. or possibly you just still want to negotiate . it seems a bit easier for you to say it. that you will just seize this chance and get it while you can! That sounds almost TOO forceful. o "well. or maybe you want it so much. or to maybe see if you can get someone to agree to it!
Tactical Formula for Listing . It also allows you a chance to watch the persons reaction to it. So maybe you say something like o "Well.. you don't just say "we can slip the deadline".
Instead of thinking about it in terms of a list. maybe you aren't ready to buy this now. This is also a good way of testing someone's response. and you are talking about you two getting together sometime.. maybe you seize this chance and get it while you can . one of them is to just slip the deadline. its your choice.Burying Items is a way to mention an outrageous or very direct option for "testing" purposes. it's your choice. But if you switch the order. just suggesting. honestly.
Strategic Formula for Listing . "let's slip the deadline" might be a problem in some circles! So when people are talking about options to help the project.. However. The idea of " seize this chance and get it while you can" is something rather challenging to say (as the seller) that directly.. But of she smiles and seems interested. maybe you aren't ready to buy this now. Instead.. If she gasps and has a look of shock and horror when you make that suggestion.. or possibly you still want to negotiate. that may be a GOOD sign. Very direct. and when you say it at the end like that. maybe it IS too direct. lets say that you want to say something or suggest something that is very direct. we can leave together right now. seems to "lighten" it up somehow. more powerful and direct statement in the middle. See? Putting that one. Sometimes you have that "direct" item in mind and you surround it with other.
..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
"Well. There are several options but. you can get away with an outrageous or very direct option by burying that option in the middle of a List." Doesn't that sound better? Meeting at a Party .Burying Items When giving examples or options to someone. lets say you are working on a project and things are behind schedule. that you are almost "worried" about how the listener may react. we can talk in a few days. more "appropriate" items to lighten it up.
After these situations occur. make a point (afterward) to think about that outrageous option. but as with any technique. For three different situations that have come up in your life recently.
. or the most direct item. go ahead and do so. Situation Outrageous or Direct Suggestion
4) For each of those examples (above) go ahead and practice out loud. 3) Think of some recent situations where you would have liked to mention a quite outrageous or direct suggestion. and go ahead and practice how you COULD have said it. you will probably encounter some situations where you might want to suggest something quite outrageous or direct. in the middle and see if it is a bit easier to imagine saying that list. Look at the items that were listed and see if one of them maybe seemed very "strong" or "direct".
2) In the near future.
Listing can be powerful. Situation Outrageous or Direct Suggestion you could have made. it can stand out too much and be annoying. you may even want to say it in a joking way. but see if you CAN say it. 2) Practice out loud how you would say that list in the situation you used in the previous exercise. and then trying saying that item in the middle. as any opportunities come up where you would like to make an outrageous or quite direct suggestion.Burying Items 1) Go back to the previous exercises where you said some "lists" out loud.Burying Items 1) As you go out and live your life. but do it by burying it in a list.
Assignments for Listing . see if it seems easier to say. suggesting a List of options but burying that outrageous option in a list.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Exercises for Listing . by burying it in a list. go ahead and create a new item that is very outrageous or direct. If there is not one. if you do it TOO much or too blatantly. write down an outrageous or very direct suggestion that you would have liked to make (for each). Bury the strongest item. Try saying it with the strongest item at the end. Try it out loud. See if you can make it sound natural. Go ahead and change the order of the list that you used earlier.
... etc". 3. emphasis. remember to use emphasis and change your voice tone with the items. if it's a VERY outrageous option. The general structure here is: • • The more X o where X is something that is hopefully quite obvious and true to the listener . we are pacing and leading. In a way. D6-T38
You have heard language like "The more X." "More and More" is just a way to use these and bring them together. o See how they are incorporated. consider this: • We talked about listing . think. o See how we are listing several items? • We discuss Pace and Lead .. the more Y
. Lets use this as a chance to really step back for a moment and look at this structure. I gave an example (in the audio) of several things I wanted someone to do. etc. or experience. and I just strung those together . and Emphasis
You may be worried about coming up with three things in a list . the more Z".. and they WILL stay through the pauses! As you are saying various items in a list. thinking about languaging such as "The more X. you are walking someone through a series of steps or thoughts. then mention several of your points or examples that support what YOU want.. while incorporating the language tools we have already discussed. then the more Y.How do you think of them quickly? How do you make them sound natural? Don't worry! It is ok to have pauses! Pauses make things sound more natural and gives you time to come up with options! We talked about the use of pauses as a way to convey some drama and to make things interesting.. 3. so this all works in your favor! Just be interesting enough to keep their attention.. Or. really.. So.3. as in . and using lists. In a way.4 MORE AND MORE.. in a List. this is just a way of bringing together many of the things we have learned.. changing tone.. and the more Y. place that item at the END of the List for more power. Pauses. and provide many examples to support it. then present it buried within a List of options. o See how that is being used here? • We have discuss language details . but have ONE that YOU really want to emphasize or get people to agree to. can help to alter how the options (and you) are perceived. Using pauses. Maybe you want to stress one item more or less.4
Listing. then the more Y.3. If you must suggest several different examples or options. to "pull" the listener in.5 Listing Review D6-T37
If you want to get your point across.. and see how..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3.. then. "the more YOU FEEL this . Maybe one or more of the items actually has an embedded command in it.
The best way to do this is to start off with the first item as quite general. future) can be altered to make it fit well. or as Y is happening . etc). etc
Examples • Convincing friends to go do something that you want to do.. present. experiences. or a new "pattern". from a general item towards something that YOU want. The More Z. If you have something that you want to lead someone through. then. and even more so with the next (more. etc. you can use "as you" or "while you" as a way to bridge between sections as well. The small words and verb tenses (past. 3.. .. agreeable.
That's a general version of it. towards what YOU want.. then just list them but use "more" as a way to go from one to the next. which is more of an example of using Pace and Lead of their current reality.. o walk someone through though process . as you feel this. more and more.
Strategic Formula for More and More If you want to lead someone through a series of steps (actions.) or thoughts (things you experience or think about.... and the more Y happens . you notice this. step 1. and something obvious.
.. • Sell TV sets.) specific.. THEN make the next item (more.... the more Z. and as Y happens o or as you sense Y. Instead of seeing this as a new type of language. As you X. or thoughts) use "More and More" as a way to string them together (and increase your chances of that happening.. then..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
o Where Y is something that is a logical extension of what the listener knows and they see this as something that makes sense . like a series of successive steps (things you do. etc
How to use it. You can even start by "pacing" a bit more. You are "leading" someone.. the More Z. As an alternative. the more Y. see it as just a way of using many of the things we have already covered! More and More tends to be best thought of as a "List". or realize Y... 2.. the more you can notice Y .. and then use More and More to lead them forward . then the more Z starts to happen.) item. with "as X is happening". the More Y. • • • • As you (or while you) X .. The more Y. the More Y. o You can start off with something obvious as a statement to kind of pace them. or "as you notice X".
Tactical Formula for More and More The more X..
. You may start with "As you" or "while you" for the first one. maybe an activity. or something you want to lead people to do somehow. of what you want to have happen. but more and more get closer to what YOU want. 2) Think of the last time you were trying to convince a friend to do something. etc.. practice and see if you can talk about these one by one. more leading. something you convince people to do (or wish you could). who should do what. Think of all of the things you can do tonight Realize that going to a movie would be a good idea Going to see the latest XYZ movie (use whatever movie you wish) See how that is a series of steps? Of thoughts? Like leading someone down a path? Now out loud. Think of three "steps". the second. work around it and make it sound natural. what to buy. something. 4) Think of another series from your life. while you. and bridging between them as we discussed earlier (More. The first should be obvious. or as alternatives. more in your direction. What do you want to convince someone to do Three steps. practice saying those in series. o Walk her through the process. they would end up doing what you wanted. to get towards doing what you want.) Write down three steps. The first should be obvious. that would "walk" the other people through the process of agreeing with you.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Talking to a woman . a series of thoughts or actions that.. "as you" or "while you". what project to work on. to get towards doing what you want..
3) Now out loud. a plan. and string them together using "more". (Agree where to go to dinner. or have them experience.
5) Out loud. etc . Write these down. as you. Do the series several times. more and more. a movie. Think of three "steps". practice saying those three steps. as if in a conversation. etc... Don't just say "more". The next is another step in the series. something with which you are familiar.)
. something simple. What you were trying to convince a friend to do Three steps. if the person followed them. or series of thoughts or actions. using "More". etc. Do that several times.
Exercises for More and More 1) Consider the idea of convincing some friends of going to a movie. a trip. Think about a series of steps. what to do. that start off in general.
becoming more and more convinced.. and you discuss these two aspects using Compare and Contrast. etc. A Tactic for Talking • Too many guys let a good conversational subject finish far too quickly. and piece them together and have it sound natural. and even change the specifics of that sequence. you can talk about. look for opportunities to use that in your life.Left
. Just make sure that with that subject. • It also a great way to get information about the person with which you are speaking. seductive. So. But get to the point where you can flow easily through the 3 in a series. This method provides a way to keep the conversation going.) • Too many guys focus on standard lines such as "So what do you like about X". This Compare and Contrast method here gives you a way to talk about and around the subjects at hand.. Practice that series more! Get very familiar with it. or various aspects of a subject. Maybe just try 2 of the 3 steps once or twice. • You are just comparing and contrasting things. • • Take a subject and either mention another aspect of that subject. The more that happens.another option • Black . • It's not magical in a persuasive sense.Bad • One option . • This works especially well if the subject of the discussion is one that "works" for our purposes (fun. the more things like "knowing what to say" and "what pattern to use" will become easier and easier for you! Notice how we are not doing these examples necessarily with women? Wonder why? 3. we had you think of something from your life.White • Right .. to continue.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Assignments for More and More 1) In the exercises. • How two things are similar • How two things are different • Good .. it's just a good way to think about discussing a subject.5 COMPARE AND CONTRAST D6-T54
Listen to an example where many of these are used.
There are various means of doing this. How to use it. you have two (or more) aspects of a topic. or else have the person you are speaking with mention it. exciting. the more you will understand how they fit together. 2) With that "More and More" sequence practiced. where you could have a series of "states" lead someone through the process of doing what you want.
You will see that the more you get these bits and pieces. you are able to easily go through such a "sequence". or several different subjects. Maybe add or change some of the reasoning. this is a means to keep speaking. and move a conversation.
you can take note of how the person is responding. and you start to talk about something she likes and enjoys doing. • Maybe what is more important to a sports team. good or bad. link away. • Anything bad. and to let the person think about. you can anchor and link positive things to you! o While talking about things she does not like.
Tactical Formula for Compare And Contrast Take any subject. o You select two items. taking a position with a more promising future. • You may talk to a woman.. You discuss this. you can anchor those away from yourself. experience. team sports. feelings. or individual sports vs..
. and start to compare and contrast the two. you can talk about one car. • Notice what is liked and not liked • Notice any reactions. her. this meeting. and contrast these things. etc. or its power. • • Use opportunities to use commands and trance words to create thoughts. Select another subject. that are good for you. etc. and talk about its attributes as well. or point in a discussion . and feel those states and emotions for a while as well. keep the discussion focused on a topic that serves your purposes. vs. compare.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
One aspect . deciding to focus on making a good living now.another attribute
As you are talking. One attribute . • Link anything good to you. Use the other language tools during the discussion. What is different about each? How are they the same? How are they experienced? What is good? What is bad? etc.
Strategic Formula for Compare And Contrast Use this technique to keep the conversation going. idea. what they like. then discuss these by comparing and contrasting. • Decisions about a career or job. As you are talking. and this situation that you are sharing. How do these differ How are they the same Which is good-bad. o While talking about what she does like. idea. and discuss whether the handling makes it better. the offense or the defense. two facets of that subject.about her) and she mentions various things about that subject. easy-difficult. • You talk to someone for a while and she say she likes scuba diving.another aspect -. This all provides a good way to allow the discussion to continue for a while.
Examples • One brand of car vs. Then discuss the other car. o Maybe you start to ask her about it (have a discussion with her . and incorporate the language tools. states. better-worse. what they do not. another brand. you can use all of the other tools we have discussed. or point in a discussion. associate them with things other than you.
different computer. somewhere else. Subject or thing that they like Attributes (things about) that. 4) Select two of the following 4 topics. Not-Like" set of things to compare and contrast. In addition. Now talk out loud about each. etc. peace. Be vary aware that even when you are discussing the thing you "Like". but this time put some effort into being very aware of the positive and negative things that are being said.. that they do like
Do the re-enactment again. clothes. offer the compare-contrast ways of discussing it. computer. She says she likes the aspect of it being very quiet and serene under water. your pacing.. As in "so let me make sure I understand this . etc. etc). Use compare and contrast to talk about each of the attributes that your friend would say they like about that subject. Also. and this time. different style of clothing.same type of thing (another car. where they were really describing or talking about something they like.. and negative things . bike..."Oh. Something that you like Something that is opposite 2) Now take that same topic.. 3) Recall a recent conversation with someone you know. and put effort into correct linking/anchoring/pointing to associate positive things to you..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Maybe you ask about it. o So we talk about the feeling of quiet. and anchor/link/point appropriately.. and those that are not good. and this time.". Be aware of your language! Throw in adjectives and adverbs. Something New Control vs.(because). and serenity on one hand o and compare and contrast that to the feeling of something new and different on the other. Now think of what is opposite to that . Be descriptive! Use pauses. etc. then I KNOW that you would NOT like THIS .
. be very aware of the positive and negative things that are being said. and talk about it again." or . that within that may be attributes that are good.. Familiarity vs. and compare/contrast the two. change your tone of voice. so if you like THAT. This example uses a very obvious "Like vs.. etc). she finds the experience of seeing new and different things to be interesting as well. Re-enact that conversation again. the same holds true even when discussing what you do NOT like.. Letting Go Safety and Excitement Liking someone mentally and/or physically o
• • • •
Exercises for Compare And Contrast 1) Pick some possession that you have that you REALLY like (car. and various things about that subject or topic that they like. Be mindful of that and anchor/link appropriately. Maybe some of the language that you are using that may lend itself to be embedded commands. she mentions various things about it.
some are bad • Talk about the good parts. link away Now this may seem tough .. and get them to talk about what THEY are interested in. People tend to think you have one OR the other.
For even more Power There IS a very powerful aspect of this technique that is important to mention. By comparing and contrasting them. BOTH linked and anchored to YOU. exciting. it's too weak. Safety vs. However there ARE ways to have BOTH. link them to you • If the bad or boring parts some up. Excitement. 3. topic." and that's ALL they talk about! Yes. Think about the possibilities. etc. this doesn't necessarily show that you
. and that's ALL you discuss.. this provides a good way to train you to be able to talk and ask questions of people.6 PARTS D7-T1
Listen to an example where these are used. etc. and the positive aspects of excitement. together. but when you go STRAIGHT for the BEST thing that she likes the MOST. then talk about all of the various aspects and parts of it. it is GOOD to focus on the positive aspects of what she likes. There ARE many things that people tend to THINK of in an "either-or" way.Who wants to talk about something that you are NOT interested in? However. Some are good. Who knows. you can show someone how that can be possible. Parts of a subject. of having all of the positive aspects of Safety. if you are asking many questions about something that is NOT of interest to you. Parts. and you lose out on spending a LOT of time having them discuss something that she REALLY likes! This is just a way to have a discussion. you may end up liking the subject and find a new activity for yourself! Don't worry that you will "give the wrong impression" by inquiring and discussing these "parts".1 Parts Of A Subject D7-T4
This is a variation on the contrast principle. theme. Meaning. Letting Go Safety and Excitement Liking someone mentally and/or physically Familiarity vs. this just helps to keep things moving in a conversation.6. Too many guys just blow things to quickly. that is fun. Something New Now do your best to speak out loud and "talk" about these for a while using a Compare and Contrast structure. and parts of a person 3.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Control vs. If you are talking about an interesting subject.. Two types of parts we can work with . YOU are then showing someone how BOTH of these things can be experienced. and say (for example) "what do you like most about scuba diving" or "what is the most fascinating thing about. For example..
maybe a hobby. If she LIKES scuba diving. Break it down into its component parts and discuss them. feelings and emotions to yourself.Don't just "talk about" Scuba Diving! Or. know about.. new things.
Examples • Scuba Diving . feelings and emotions. area of interest. don't just ask "What is the most exciting thing about Scuba Diving?" That IS a good question. sport.many of which can be linked to you. be comfortable talking about all of the parts of that subject. or point in a discussion. that you know.. o Where have they dived? o How did they get into it? o What's their favorite place? o Do they have their own equipment? o Do they use different types of equipment for different locations? o How long have they dived? o Have they ever been in danger? o Have they taken photos? o Have they met interesting people? o Has this exposed them to any other cool sports or activities? o etc. and she may have a lot of positive emotions and feeling associated with that . allowing you time to gather information and link yourself to good thoughts.
Exercises for Parts of a Subject . just curious. and enjoys. just say "I like learning about people. This is a great way to build rapport with a person as well. This isn't just a way for you to ask ask ask HER about things." This technique makes it easier to have conversations with people because THEY are giving you information and ideas for new things to ask about. like. etc. artistic endeavor.
. idea. etc. list various "things" about that subject.
Tactical Formula for Parts of a Subject Take any subject. activity. Subjects come up. that an opportunity to talk for a WHILE about something she likes. Link good thoughts. it's hard to talk about that subject for a while. etc.. If someone asks you about this. Now. Use the language tools in the discussion. topics come up.
Strategic Formula for Parts of a Subject Discussing many of the parts of a subject keeps the conversation going. don't like. what people do. You are just asking. but if you start there. 1) Pick a subject that you like.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
are interested in it (the subject).
. If you have trouble. or Things About. a job they like. and you have heard him or her talk about this. This should be someone you know well. That Subject:
2) Think of one of your friends or family members and some activity or topic that THEY are really into. or maybe someone in your life that you don't know very well. etc. Now think of something that THAT person is interested in or they are involved with. if your subject was football. and you were going to have someone (who knows very little about the subject) interview you and learn all about football. You should easily be able to come up with 10-20 items. someone you met at a party. Someone that you recently met. like a co-worker. what would you ask about? What are all of the various things and aspects of it that YOU could inquire about or that could come up in a discussion? These are the "parts" of that subject. Now. Write these down. Subject: Parts. if you were going to talk to them for like 30 minutes about that subject and were really going to ask them about it. That Subject:
3) Now think of someone who you are NOT close to (that you do not know that well). or Things About. what parts about football would you want them to ask about? For your chosen subject. maybe pick a different "person" as your subject. maybe a cousin you hardly see or talk to. but hopefully this "subject" is something you are not really into. Maybe their hobby. You should be able to come up with at least 10 items. passion.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course For example. Person: Subject: Parts. make a list of these parts.
That Subject: "
4) Think of another person and subject. out loud.. you should be able to list at least 10 items. They are talking about something THEY like Thinking about it. when you are speaking with a person you do not know hardly at all (yet you feel you will be able to talk to them for 10-15 minutes). The subject they are interested in is something with which you are NOT familiar. off the "top of your head". Now. while YOU are there And you are linking and anchoring things to yourself Using all of the language tools and details And that person is finding YOU so fascinating and charismatic . and were really going to ask them about it. when you are speaking with a friend or family member that you know well. make a point to have a good 10-15 minute conversation about a subject that THEY are really interested in. Again. Person: Subject:
Assignments for Parts of a Subject 1) Sometime soon.
. but with which you are NOT familiar. mention like 10-15 different things you could ask or inquire about that subject. what would you ask about? What are all of the various things and aspects of it that YOU could inquire about? What are the PARTS you could ask about? Write these down. like the exercise above. If you were going to talk to them for like 30 minutes about that subject. but with which you are NOT familiar. or Things About. don't know really well. and feeling it. You know the person but you are not real close to them.. experiencing it.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course The key here is that this is someone you don't see often. Person: Subject: Parts. make a point to have a good 10-15 minute conversation about a subject that THEY are really interested in. And of course the entire time. who is interested in something that you are NOT familiar with. Make a point to ask about many different parts of that subject. Make a point to ask about many different parts of that subject. 2) Sometime in the future.
" • There will be a lot of this shown in examples here in this section and at the end of the program.. or parts. if a personality trait. in a way you are also using Compare and Contrast as well. they hold back. o Either in general like "there may be another side" o or more directly. lean more on the language and linking tools to bring it out. (where XYZ is a different or maybe the opposite behavior.. make it be experienced. Don't Confront.. they are quiet.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
. Because you are discussing several things. • If a person is shy. In fact a friend of mine is very shy and one time.. Discuss. In this context." o "You may have (or do have) another part (or side. link it to you... etc. there is a more quiet side • If a person is well-thought-out (thinks things through and takes time).. • "That's because there is another part.6." o "Many people like that also have another side to themselves. and I have found she has this other side. or has the same wishes that you do. or part of a person.. their way of walking through and looking at the world. In a discussion. etc)" o "I know someone similar who as this other part to themselves. if the person is shy o "I understand how some people are shy. or normally don't "do" certain things? • Then talk about that first (shy) part. or side. etc." • If this new or other "side" works more in your favor. that XYZ part". that is more .2
Parts Of A Person
Listen to an example where this concept is used. or reserved. a way of acting or being is being discussed (and one that does not necessarily work in your favor) . that part of the person or type of behavior that DOES agree with you). that adventurous side is just waiting to come out. Let's break this down. or way of looking at it. or view.. • Acknowledge the first part that is being discussed. and they feel that way." • Bring up and acknowledge the fact that there is "another" part. adventurous . their reactions. just looking for the right time. • What if it is not? What if they say they are shy. another part hidden away. verify it. etc. A key concept to think about is to ALWAYS assume that there is a part of someone that does agree with you. more spontaneous side to them. "you may have the other side" o or by example "I know someone like that. "parts" are meant as in a personality trait. there is a more decisive. there is a more adventurous part to themselves • If a person is outspoken. experiencing it. exciting part of a person is being discussed. • If an adventurous.. This can be VERY powerful... etc. what she did . directly or indirectly o For example. a "side" to the person. and start to discuss and validate that OTHER part. we are also reframing! We are changing the way they look at things. You do not want to appear to challenge or invalidate and personality trait that is being shown.. In many ways..... and then say (for example). great. a way of thinking... etc" • Discuss this new or other "part" o "With many people. o "When you start to listen to this adventurous side . Let's say you are in a discussion with someone.
. and beliefs. way of thinking. Well... even when the other person claims or demonstrates that such parts are NOT there.. deep down. People have many sides to themselves.. but it can be handled . Traits similar to "Being Boring"
.. so be careful. discuss. etc etc etc.. way of thinking. etc. Find a personality trait... and evoke favorable states. and what I noticed about her is that she also has this other side to her. You can work around this issue (of possible confrontation) by saying things like o "I think another way of looking at that trait is . Introduce and discuss that "other part" in a way that works to your advantage. or part of the person (mostly something which has a negative connotation) Acknowledge that personality trait. o "I was reading somewhere about things like that and what it was saying was. This one side .. and 3 that are opposite. What personality traits (or what other parts or ways of thinking) are similar? Which are somewhat opposite? Write down 3 that are similar. having a conversation... • Maybe someone says they can be jealous.
Examples: • Lets say that a person says they are not into taking challenges. (not good in a person. . I understand you have that side to you. • Maybe someone is secretive. that may be true but also there is another part of them . feelings. or part of the person by discussing or addressing it Think about a personality trait. • Maybe someone lies . and she realized that she. "I am boring". o "Well. it may sound like you are arguing or challenging the person. Remember.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
• • •
Many times you don't want to say "because there is another part" because that seems too direct..."
Strategic Formula for Parts of a Person Use Parts of a Person as a way to find.)
Exercises for Parts of a Person 1) What if someone says. "you are wrong" or to show how smart you are! You are just talking. assume there is a part that will work WITH you. was also "Y".. or part of the person that is somehow related (which works in your favor) or somewhat opposite. There are also other sides to people . way of thinking. that can work in your favor... you are NOT discussing this as to say.. o "A friend of mine does that as well. they like to play things safe.. too confrontational. o "I have a friend who was "X" (where X is the trait being discussed)..
Tactical Formula for Parts of a Person For every part of a person that will work against you..
etc. pick another part or trait. 3) What if someone says that they are shy? What personality traits (or what other parts or ways of thinking) are similar? Which are somewhat opposite? Write down 3 that are similar. and then bring up this other "part" that you selected. Look at the formula earlier. What personality traits (or what other parts. which could you maybe "use" in a good way? 2) Think about how you would discuss the boring part. Imagine a conversation and how you might do this. 6) Lets say someone says "I am not into meeting any new people right now" . Imagine a conversation and how you might do this. maybe do some linking an anchoring.
. Now do a similar exercise again out loud..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Traits opposite to "Being Boring"
Of those that you listed. 5) From the list you just made (and selected from). and some of the variations mentioned for language examples. Look at the formula earlier. Practice this out loud. Traits similar to "not into meeting any new people"
Traits opposite to "not into meeting any new people"
Practice out loud how you might first discuss "I am not into meeting any new people right now" and then transition into the other parts or traits that you selected. Traits similar to "Being Shy"
Traits opposite to "Being Shy"
Of those that you listed. and then bring up this other "part" that you selected. use this/that/these/those .. which could you maybe "use" in a good way? 4) Think about how you would discuss that shy part. Practice this out loud. but this time.. or ways of thinking) are similar? Which are somewhat opposite? Think about 1-2 that you could use. and 3 that are opposite. and some of the variations mentioned for language examples. be aware of opportunities to maybe mark off an embedded command or two (or more)..
See if you can arrive at a similar part or trait that you can discuss that could be used in your favor. trusting their own judgment.. but ROW see how many of the speaking and language tools you can use.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 7) Do the above example again. see if you can notice them WHILE talking to someone. start to bring them up IN the conversation. You don't have to discuss them (yet) just make a point to note these traits. You have probably heard the phrase "structure opportunities. or mentions a "way of thinking"). and has been a bit difficult for many to really understand
. being open. 9) Lets say someone says "I only like dating my TYPE"? What other part. trait. or parts. make note of when you are having a personal conversation with anyone. This area has caused some confusion. acknowledge it. and offer challenges to you on the audio. see if you could maybe think of an opposite one that could be discussed. WHILE talking to someone.
2) After you have become more comfortable noticing such traits after-the-fact.? What other part.
Assignments for Parts of a Person 1) For the next week or two. 3) Now that you can recognize these traits when talking to someone. See if what they are saying describes or is pointing out any personality traits (or a "part" of themselves. After the conversation. Use the formula and the variations mentioned earlier.7
OPPORTUNITIES AND CHALLENGES
Listen to an example where I structure opportunities.
3. and offer challenges" many times when studying these materials. etc could you discuss? Try that out loud.. and then find a way to discuss another part that is more favorable or positive. An easy way to do this is when a friend or acquaintance is being self-deprecating in some manner. or putting him or herself down for some reason. trait. Or. Opposite (or similar?) trait or part that might actually work in your favor
Traits or parts that were discussed. 8) Lets say someone says they have trouble meeting new people. and then point out some other trait or part that might work in your favor somehow. etc could you discuss? Try that out loud. make a note of these traits or parts. Just notice the trait or part being mentioned. See if you can note that "part" of who they are.
this can be very effective.
3. these concepts are broken down and offered to you in a way that will truly help you to be able to use these powerful techniques. then by using their existing desires." • This is NOT about arrogance. "You may be beautiful. • It's easy. • These are also good and convenient for practicing and examples. you are just showing that YOU have standards.1 Using Their Own Processes D7-T36
If you know what people want to have. • Use these general things and assume they are there. • Show that you have standards.
Strategic Formula for Opportunities And Challenges Find or assume what someone wants Create an opportunity for them to get it or demonstrate they have it Make that "demonstration" work in your favor. You are in. • Show that you are qualifying and screening to some extent.7. then they already have mechanisms for that in their mind. For example if someone is intelligent. but may not be the most effective strategy. or want to be perceived as having. It's good to somehow work with structures and things that are already in someone's mind. you are using processes that they ALREADY have in their minds. and wants to be seen as intelligent. If you can somehow frame or map yourself as being a way for a person to fulfill things that someone already wants. do it. and that you believe in yourself. but I am looking for more. o This is the opposite of pleading and the "pedestal" scenario. or like to be perceived as having. Universal Wants • Confidence • Maturity • Security • Self-Directed • Intelligence • Control • Excitement
. or be with you.2
What do people want?
"Universal Wants" = Good.7. effect. In this section. using motivations that a person already has. or show it. Why this matters. Work with universal things that people would like to have.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
and utilize. o You are saying in a way. Challenge them to demonstrate it. 3. is a way for them to show their intelligence. You then find some way to set things up so that choosing to listen to you.
o Talk about what she does. o If you can .. o Try using some of the above items. can (use smart. o You might. o Talk about some of yours and see how she reacts. What does she want to have. that's even better. or fun.. o Talk to her and find out what she wants or needs. "you can show me that you have the thing you desire. Warning .. o You seem smart enough . but if you can find or work with specific wants or desires.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
"Particular Wants" = Better! What does THIS person want? • Notice o o o particular things that this individual would like to have or be perceived as having She mentions wanting respect She defends her position.. o You seem like you may have good taste o etc.. wants to have.. Mini-Challenge Cheat Sheet o You seem . and challenging them in a way that says.. or want to be perceived as having. o You seem cool enough . o You seem as if.. o Always have the question below in mind.This technique can be overused. o The smart people I know. etc
Finding these particular wants and desires o These "wants" can be possessions. You are challenging an ASSUMED desire (a "Universal Want")... what she likes to do. o Maybe you can .. o You seem like .. • Mini-Challenges o You might get this . o If you are able to ... her interests.. or maybe a value. and it can really annoy people if you do!
. o I wonder if you can .. o You may . or an image she wants other people to have of her. along with the Universal Wants listed earlier!
We assume here that with a mini-challenge. o You might see .7.. etc).. o Are you able to . or want to be perceived as having? Mini-Challenges D7-T40
3.. or be seen as having "X".3
There are certain things you can assume that most people may want to have. by listening to me or agreeing with me". You can imply a "test" for these things by issuing a mini-challenge....... or adventurous.. we are using one of these sort of "universal" wants.. o etc... and discusses what is important to her She mentions something she likes or dislikes about a past boyfriend..
• Confidence • Maturity • Security • Self-Directed • Intelligence • Control • Excitement
.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Tactical Formula for Mini Challenges Assume something she wants to have. (and again.4
Opportunities and Challenges
Think of it like this...
Exercises for Mini-Challenges 1) Try piecing together items from the Universal Wants List. Make a statement that says. by doing "Y" Make "Y" something that works in your favor.. • Create an opportunity for them to get that • Make it so that them "getting" that works in your favor. or hopefully find..
3. you will show me you have that". "Show me you have that thing by listening and/or agreeing with me" or. • Find what someone "wants". and Mini-Challenge Cheat Sheet. "By listening to and/or agreeing with me.7.
Tactical Formula for Opportunities and Challenges Find something "X" that the person wants to have. • Challenge them to see if they will follow through and take action to get it. or been seen as having You can assume based on normal things that people want (Universal Want) or Get information from talking (Particular Want) Create an opportunity for them to get or demonstrate "X". here we have to "assume" things for the sake of teaching) . or be seen as having. in a way. • Universal Wants • Particular Wants Opportunities. Challenge the person to do "Y". and see how many combinations you can come up with. what someone wants. Creating Them Consider the wants and needs that a person may have .
What does someone Want? Assume.
o .. by meeting this "challenge".. Create the opportunity for them to show or demonstrate that they have or are perceived as having. • Maybe point out something a friend did .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
You need to create an "opportunity" for each of these.. Examples. and/or HAVING them. Provide an example of someone. on their own. o Talk about how confident people can make their own choices. o They can do exciting things.
Provide a way to demonstrate that they DO have what they want. Examples: • Does she really want X and see how Y can get that? • Does she really have X. • Confidence ... Maturity . where this opportunity benefits you (and hopefully pertains to the situation). or want to be seen as having Structure this so that it is something that YOU would like them to do. • Here is how I read/heard that someone else had or was able to get X. o Let the person demonstrate how confident they are. or some way for this person to capture the opportunity • Provide an example of something she can say or do... even if their friends don't approve. • Here is a way a friend of mine showed that they have or was able to get X. or show what they have. and see how doing Y would demonstrate it?> • Does she have what it takes to get X.How can you create an opportunity for someone to appear confident (that works in your favor)? o Discuss people that YOU know. Challenges Are they ready to take advantage of that (this) opportunity? Challenge them to get what they want. and how the confident ones are able to take chances and have fun. and feel very comfortable with that.. by doing Y?
.. o They can go against the grain. • Provide an example from your own life. what does a mature person do? How are they seen? How do they react? o They make their own decisions o They trust their own judgment o They can decide to do something NOW. talk about DOING them. How can you make that sound like a way for them to "show" something? How to create an opportunity? • Here is a way for you to show me that you really have or was able to get X. Talk about those things. o Mention how confident people can meet someone new. something they want..Think about maturity . • Mention something that you have read.
and do Y to get it? Can she do Y and make it happen? Can she see that Y will get her what she wants? Can she trust herself enough to do Y? etc. there are others shown earlier. then . It's different from the way most guys think. Then at some point you talk about you and her getting together. to be a way for them to get what they want. and say something like "well.. she actually felt more secure about being able to take care of herself. You talk about a friend who has always wanted to feel secure. or be perceived as having.
. I don't know if you are adventurous enough for this." Adventurous o Maybe she wants to feel adventurous... Some examples are shown below.
They want X.. to show or demonstrate that? Examples: • Security o Say she wants to feel secure. • Challenge them to do that. Later. and she found that by taking chances and risks. how she may be adventurous.. but.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
• • • • • •
Does she want you to THINK she has X. You talk about that for a while.". she may have to do Y to prove that.. you mention "We should get together sometime. Can she see an opportunity to have "X". Assumed Wants
2) Write a Mini Challenge for each if the above items.. I mean. what this means to her. Success o Maybe "success" is important to her. as long as you trust yourself enough to feel that is OK .. You discuss success for a while.. • Find out what someone wants..
Exercises and Assignments for Opportunities and Challenges 1) Make a list of some assumed things that many people may want to have. Are they ready to do Y. and mention that you read somewhere that successful people tend to be able to trust their own judgment. Is she ready to take chances? Take risks? Do something different? Maybe not . It's NOT about creating an argument! Again..
I know this is tricky. These are your "Assumed Wants". • Find a way to map what YOU want. their own intuition.
For each person.. "lets see if this makes sense to you "see if you can follow this . Person What they want to have." Mini Challenges
3) Practice the list of Mini Challenges you just created. out loud 4) Make a note of some of the ones you practiced that seem closest to something you could easily say or do with people in your life....Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course "you seem like .. Hopefully these are specific to them. or wants to be perceived as having. friends.
5) Think about some people that you know quite well like family. and go out and actually USE them for a while. and focus on using these. and NOT just things from the "assumed" list. write down something that each wants to have. etc. Note some of your favorites ones below... co-workers. or be perceived as having
. quite unique. "you might. Practice these more. Write down these "Wants". "you may .
even subconsciously. see if you can create a "challenge". Person Opportunity for them to get what they "want" that somehow works in your favor
7) For each "want". and that allows them to be better at their sport. Person Challenge
8) Practice each of those "Challenges" out loud.A friend wants to be really good at a sport. (You want that friend to lighten up and be able to spend more time going out and having fun. Example .. and "opportunity".) So you challenge their dedication to their sport by saying "I was reading about really good athletes and one thing that was pointed out was that a lot of them really can get burned out. Is there a way to create an "opportunity" for them to get or achieve that? Can you somehow create an opportunity that can be "mapped" in some way towards yourself. and write them down. they will be doing something that YOU want. as making them look at you more positively. or that in some way could be interpreted..
. Some way that questions . The good athletes find a way to relax and have fun. are they ready? Can they take action? Can they DO this? Write down these "Challenges"." The "opportunity" is for them to be a better athlete. and how can you "map" it to yourself? Write down these "Opportunities". You are "mapping" it to you because by doing what you discuss. etc? Give that some thought.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
6) Consider the "want" that you identified from each of those persons above. What is the opportunity. want to do what you wish. See if you can make it sound natural. and they spend a LOT of time practicing.
These are those words or phrases that can mean more than one thing. look at how many items we have covered so far. • SPEAKING POINTERS o The "Cool" Factor o Voice Tone And Tonality o Pacing And Pausing o Energy And Enthusiasm LANGUAGE TOOLS AND DETAILS o Adjectives And Adverbs o Trance Words o Weasel Phrases o Embedded Commands o Linking o Easy-Linking (This. Do what you can to bring these up while in the conversation if you can. What do they "want". but also ask some questions and get into a discussion about it if possible. but now also start to look for "opportunities and challenges" in a way that directs their desires towards you.. they mean something different..Point Or Touch On Positive And Negative LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES o Pace And Lead " Topics and Subjects * Mindset of Frame • Current Reality o Give Them A Reason
.. you no doubt have heard many examples of "ambiguities".8
If you have studied this material for a while. that these become familiar. listen. do the same in terms of observing desires.) o Easy Anchoring .9 SUMMARY D7-T66
Bringing it together. Listen. to do things that you would want. we will not be doing any specific work on Ambiguities. 10) While you are talking to people for the next 1-2 weeks. That.
3. That. This is one area that many guys actually ARE able to pick up and use easily if they have listened to the materials enough. but in another context. listen. These. 3. given that this IS an area that many guys are able to do (with enough listening) and given the many OTHER areas that really DO need the assistance of a program like this. Try to guess. really focus on what each person desires.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
9) As you become more familiar with these practiced challenges and opportunities. see if you can bring them up in conversations over the next few weeks. Those) MORE TOOLS o Pointing And Gestures o Linking Gestures (Towards And Away) o Easy Linking Expanded (Pointing With This. Although there could be a section in this course that deals with these areas. 11) For the next 1-2 weeks.. so that you have heard them SO MANY TIMES. listen. They may have one meaning in one context.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
o o o
Listing • General • At the End • Burying Items More And More Compare And Contrast Parts • Parts of a Subject • Parts of a Person Opportunities And Challenges • Mini Challenges • Opportunities And Challenges Ambiguities
These are the building blocks for good Language skills. These are the sorts of skills that are most workable when they are truly "wired in" to someone, so that they are able to be used automatically. To try to "remember" to do such things can be very difficult. That approach would make having a conversation far too difficult and too much work! The best way is to work with these techniques SO much that these truly are just a part of "how you talk". With enough practice, and hearing these enough, you CAN have these become a part of how. YOU talk! So listen, practice, do the exercises, do the assignments, and do that all again, until these really do become a part of you, and a part of how you speak.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
D8-T1 A key aspect of making these tools work is getting the conversation into topic areas that will really work for you. The language tools you studied earlier are best used in the proper context, and in this section, we will learn how to get the conversation into areas that will create that context. Have you had these problems? • You JUMP too quickly into a pattern or topic, and it sounds really strange? • You just THROW a pattern AT her, and get a weird reaction? When you use these tools, or even use "patterns", it's not enough to just "say it", there has to be the correct CONTEXT for what is said! It's a process that she needs to go on and through with you. It's not enough to just find a conversational excuse to "throw" a pattern (or language tool) AT her! This section is about finding ways to just get into an interesting conversation and then towards and onto good topics. We want this to seem natural, and with some understanding, practice, and a few key strategies and tactics it will BE natural and automatic! 4.1 4.1.1 CHALLENGES -a Detailed And Specific Plans Are Just Not Workable. D8-T3
It's good to theorize to "say this", and then "say that", and then to use "this pattern", and "that pattern". However, the problem is that a lot of time the proper context is not presented well enough. The examples you may have seen in other products are just that, examples. The problem is that too many guys have taken them literally! Guys try to do "X, Y, Z," exactly, in order, with no sense of calibration, or being able to work and re-direct things in real time. Therefore, detailed tactical plans are not realistic. 4.1.2 Navigation Example D8-T4
Think of moving a conversation to a certain point, like taking a trip somewhere. Say you are in Chicago, and want to go to Los Angeles. You could have a detailed map of every turn and road, exact route numbers and lengths, etc. The problem is... what do you do if there is a detour? What if the road is changed, what if the map is wrong? You are lost! What if, instead, we teach you how to drive the car, and give you a general set of directions like "keep driving west, until you see the ocean, then turn left (south)". That way, you can handle just about any turns, roads, or detours that you may encounter! Conversations are different from roads too, because people are all unique, situations, times, surroundings etc. are unique and change from moment to moment. Therefore, if you want to get a conversation to go a certain way, then detailed plans made ahead of time are hard to work with. There are too many variables! We need a workable set of strategies and tactics that allows you, in real-time, to direct things the way that you want them to go. They need to be easy to follow, and easy to use, and something that you don't need to "think about", but can just DO easily.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Navigational Strategies Are Needed
So we need a general set of guidelines, some overall strategies and tactics, so that you can have this good, intuitive sense of how to "steer" things, and get conversations to where you want them to go. As long as you are engaging a woman's emotions, capturing & leading her imagination, then you are moving in the right direction. Then, in that situation and in that context, linking all the positive & powerful things to you becomes more workable. Instead of a map, we are giving you a "compass". We need a strategy for managing conversations that can to do this gradually, in a way that seems natural! If it's too abrupt or makes the conversation strained, it will sound weird. The strategy must LEAD the conversation towards good topics and subjects in a way that seems natural, and is not TOO abrupt. Examples: (Listen to the audio.) • Talking about a printer o Moving TOO quickly towards emotional topics o Can sound strange • Driving a car and taking a turn (Analogy) o Think of driving down freeway and needing to switch to different direction. o You can't make a hard, right angle turn on a dime! o You need to turn the car, slowly, on a ramp to go in a different direction. When we control conversions, we need to find a way to take it gradually in a new direction. Many guys try to do the hard and fast switch, and they crash in the process! We will learn to move things in a way that makes it seem natural, but it will be deliberate. 4.1.4 She Must Be Engaged In The Conversation! D8-T10
It's important to get conversations into the right area and have HER go along with you. Not just "bring it up" (a topic or pattern), but it must be natural and she must "go along" with it and be a PART of it. She must be actually THINKING about what you are discussing! It has to happen naturally. No weird jumps. It's not enough to just talk; she must BE a part of the conversation! So, don't just "jump" to a topic. Don't find an "excuse" to bring it up. Take the conversation there, take her WITH you, and have her be a part of it! What really helps is to have a genuine interest (or at least curiosity) in her and the conversation, not just thinking to yourself; "How can I use this?" 4.2 HOW CONVERSATIONS HAPPEN D8-T12
How does this really occur? We will break this down so that we have a way to really affect this process. 4.2.1 Conversational Dynamics D8-T13
How do conversations happen? Most of them occur somewhat randomly as the conversation flows from topic to topic over time, and can end up almost anywhere after a while. By the time YOU move from one topic to the next,
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
you may end up in a very different place from where you began. However, there is a series of steps as things move forward, as shown in Figure 4.2.1-1.
Figure 4.2.1-1: Conversations Move Through Many Topics
Each of these steps between topics tends to be related. Topic 1 relates to Topic 2. Topic 2 relates to Topic 3, etc. For example, you can start to talk about Cars, and then move to one aspect of that topic, Car Seats. Then it's easy to move to some aspect of that topic, which maybe something that seats are made of, like Leather. Then maybe you talk about Leather Furniture, etc. (See Figure 4.2.1-2.)
Figure 4.2.1-2: Each Topic Flows To the Next Topic In most cases, each Topic is related to the one before.
After a series of such steps, you can be at a quite different topic (like an apartment that you used to live in) even though you started at a quite different topic (Cars). In most cases, it's very difficult to predict where a conversation will go after many of these steps. As you go through a few topic shifts (as shown in the diagrams), although each individual shift relates to the topic before and after that shift, after a series of shifts you can end up talking about almost anything! Therefore, even if you start the conversation at a great topic, you can get off-track and into topics that will not work in your favor. Conversely, what is needed is a way to start at almost any topic at all, and by steering that process (of moving from Topic 1, to Topic 2, Topic 3, etc) take the conversation into better and better topic areas that will serve your purposes. 4.2.2 Conversational Model D8-T14
We introduce a model to assist in discussion, understanding, and control of conversations. If you start at a topic, how do you go to another one? This process happens all of the time very easily. The key is that the movement from one topic to the next takes places easily because there are so many options involved. From any topic (Topic 1) it is easy to flow to any of 6-8 other, related topics (Topic 2 Candidates). People usually just "talk" and naturally the conversation moves from the first topic to the next one. Since the "next" topic is related, this process seems natural and is easy to do. In fact, you do this all the time without really knowing about it. (We are creating a model to describe a process that happens naturally, so that we can teach you a way to have an affect on that process). Figure 4.2.2-1 shows how from one topic, the conversation can flow easily to many related topics.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Car you own Seats in it Interior of your car How Powerful it is What Gas does it use How Fast it is Feel of Driving Places you have gone Where you bought it
Topic 2 Candidates
Figure 4.2.2-1: From One Topic to many Candidate Topics The topic of Cars is discussed, and from there are many ways the conversation can easily move.
Once the conversation moves to one of these eight topics, it's easy to move to one of eight more. For example if in Figure 4.2.2-1, the conversation flows from "Cars" to "Where you bought it" (as in, where you bought the car), then now we have a situation like that shown in Figure 4.2.2-2.
Where you bought it
That car dealer The salesman Part of town Other car dealers Who went with you How you bought it The Loan you used etc. Topic 3 Candidates
Figure 4.2.2-2: From A Second Topic, Another Group of Candidates If "Cars" was discussed first, and then "Where you bought it" was discussed next, there are now many ways to go in the next step. In the figure, you see how the conversation moves from Cars, to "Where you bought it". After that, there are many "candidate" topics where the conversation can flow. Perhaps it moves to the "Part of town" where the car was purchased.
Now from the topic of "Where you bought it" (a car), there are easily eight places that you can go from there, shown as the "Topic 3 candidates". This process continues throughout a conversation. This process happens regardless of the specific topics being discussed. Conversations flow from topic to topic, as shown in a general manner in Figure 4.2.2-3.
then talk about Z" are very difficult to really work with. This results in easily over 500 topics that could be selected by the time we arrive at Topic 4! In only three shifts of the topic ("topic shifts" as shown in the figure) we end up with many many possibilities of where the conversation might end up.2-4 shows what happens when all the topics are considered. you can affect this process (and we will teach that to you). In general. you can have up to eight different ways to go at EACH step. an so on. since it's so easy to go from any topic to 6-8 others. Do you see why the pre-planned approaches can be difficult?! Even if you ARE able to have the conversation start from a specific place (Topic 1). However. then EACH of the eight different candidates for Topic 2 can then lead to their own eight.2. the plans that many guys try to use to "Talk about X. If Topic 1 can lead to eight different candidates for Topic 2. and at each step after that.2. when talking to some random person.
In many ways. there is no way to know exactly where it will end up by the time you have moved forward a few steps! Imagine trying to predict ahead-of-time exactly where you may arrive (among those 512 options).2-3: Topics Flow from One to the Next Each topic in a conversation can easily lead to 6-8 others. because there are SO many ways that things can go!
. the Figures that have been shown so far only show a small portion of the total topics towards which a conversation can flow. and the conversation flows along in this manner. then talk about Y. With some skill and technique. When this happens in succession.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Figure 4. you can end up with the conversation going almost anywhere! Figure 4.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
1st Topic Shift
2nd Topic Shift
3rd Topic Shift
Figure 4. it can flow from there.2.
. you can end up in over 500 different topic areas!
We can create a general Conversation Model that shows this process (Figure 4.2-4: Topic Candidates and Topic Shifts If each topic can flow to eight others. As seen in the diagram.2. then after only three shifts in the topic. Once Topic 2 has been discussed.2-5). and so on. It then can flow easily to maybe 6-8 others (the diagram shows fewer for the sake of clarity). a conversation may start from one topic or subject (Topic 1).
is an awareness of this phenomenon that is called the "Topic Turning Point". In fact. then for that diagram to be really accurate it would have to show over 30.
There are SO many ways it can flow. that they become far too many to shown in the diagram.2. If you are discussing one specific topic.
. The diagram only shows a small fraction of them (so that the diagram is not even more cluttered than it already is!).2.000 different subjects or topics that could be discussed by the time you are at "Level 6" in the conversation!! 4.2. This process of moving from the first topic to one of 6-8 relevant topics is the process of moving through a "Topic Turning Point" as shown in Figure 4. if you assume that from any topic you could go to any of 8 other topics.3-1. it is quite easy to move from that onto 6-8 related topics.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Figure 4.3 Topic Turning Point D8-T15
The KEY concept the needs to be understood to gain the ability to manage conversations. (The figure only shows a portion of how many subjects and topics can be reached).2-5: Conversation Model The "Tree of Subjects" showing how thousands of subjects can be reached in just a few steps of the conversation.
The key thing to realize is that this process of Topic Turning Point (TTP) selection occurs over and over. as long as the new topic is "related" to the first (this is shown in the diagram by the "candidates") then this change is easy to do.3-1: The Topic Turning Point (TTP) When discussing any topic (First Topic) there are easily 6-8 different topics to which the conversation can be moved (Candidate Topics).3-2: How TTP Selections Effect the Conversation The selections made at each TTP are what actually "steer" the conversation in a certain direction.3-2
Topic Turning Points
Figure 4.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Candidate Topics Figure 4. the conversation "shifts" slightly. the conversation can then move to another topic.
For example. and throughout a conversation. introduce an idea. Therefore. A general way of looking at this process is shown in Figure 4. Someone might make a comment. However.2.
. make a statement.2.2. etc. the overall flow of a conversation comes about due to many of these TTP choices being made. after one topic has been discussed for a short while. ask a question.
no one is "deciding" the TTPs. conversations are one of four types: • • • • Fun.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Normally. positive aspects of every topic being discussed. and they quick steer the conversation in that manner. These types of people are making TTP selections based on a strategy of finding things that are negative to talk about. and the conversation tend to into one of four general areas. and some training (which . very quickly. IMPORTANT: The overall direction of a conversation comes about due to a successive selection of TTPs.
So to start our process of learning how to manage conversations. fun.1-1. The flow of the conversation starts. they find a way to point out something negative. we are going to later teach you a way to be able to make these TTP selections. they somehow see it in terms how in effects their beliefs.. fun. By manipulating TTPs from moment to moment. and do so in a way that sounds VERY natural. As you have probably guessed by now. and that work in YOUR favor. Sometimes this can be VERY apparent. In a very broad sense. we want the conversation to be positive. D8-T16 D8-T16
So how can you actually affect the flow of a conversation.. depressing Confrontational . positive way to look at anything. interesting things".3.3. to "route" conversations so that they end up being the kinds of conversations that YOU want to have. Can you see how you may be able to affect where a conversation goes? You might not be able to predict EXACTLY where it ends up.)
. and interesting.. and imagine if you had a general way to manipulate these TTPs. positive. you can direct where the overall conversation goes. These people are able to automatically make TTP choices based on a strategy of finding good. However. isn't it? In general. they Good Boring Bad Argument could be more specific (and we will get there). moment-to-moment.Those are just general examples.. easily and naturally? That IS the point. No matter WHAT you talk to them about.1 GENERAL CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Want. conversations tend to go in one of several ways. • Other people able to direct conversations based on their own beliefs and their own political motivations as well. This selection just "happens". 4. interesting Mundane and uninteresting Negative. The overall strategy at the beginning is then to "talk about positive. fun. (See Figure 4. For example: • Maybe someone always finds a fun.) then you CAN direct how a conversation flows. no matter WHAT is discussed. Look in the diagrams. but you will have some control over the overall direction.3 4. is coming soon.. we want to first start to steer things in the best general manner. • Other people direct conversations based upon their own moral or religious values. choices are made moment to moment. Many people do this "TTP selection" process automatically. • Other people may do the opposite. That ability alone is enough for our purposes. with some awareness of this process..
Figure 4. fun. fun. and Interesting". do what you can to steer in that direction.
Strategic Formula for General Conversational Management To steer the conversation in a good direction.1-1: General Conversational Management Consider all of the ways a conversation can go. Positive. interesting things. interesting things. Introduce topics that are fun. If you break that down into 4 main directions.
. interesting things. bring up positive. Positive.3. you can still "steer" back towards "Fun. Even if things move towards other areas. Don't engage in conversations when it's NOT about positive.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
General Conversational Management
Conversations tend to flow in one of four major ways. fun. steer towards Fun. positive and interesting. you see that you want to focus the conversation onto topics that are "Fun. No matter what is brought up. and Interesting topics and subjects. and Interesting" things. so from the earliest stages. Positive.
How do you do that? • • • Show interest when someone discusses positive.
the TTP. the topic "candidates" that were shown earlier)."Where can I go that is fun. and then you move things in that direction! Remember .)
Tactical Formula for General Conversational Management Keep thinking . positive. you can direct where the overall conversation goes. TTP Mantra . So you just think to yourself "Where can I go that is fan. You then think of several ways you can go (the related topics. as long as it moves things in a way that answers the question "Where can I go that is fun.The overall direction of a conversation comes about due to a successive selection of TTPs. and Interesting". and interesting?" Move the conversation in that direction. you can always think of 6-8 other related topics or subjects. By manipulating TTPs from moment to moment.2-1. You think of the "candidates" (the related topics or subjects that you can discuss) that serve you at the time.Where can I go that is "fun. TTP options. For any subject. positive. Positive.3. and interesting" and just move things in that direction. and interesting"? Moment-to-moment. or something you read.. . positive.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
4. you make note of where you are in the conversation. and interesting" (See Figure 4.
.3. as we discussed earlier. Positive.2
How To Steer Conversations. move things towards the related topics that are "Fun.3. Moment To Moment
Look at the overall flow of a conversation and break it down to its smallest point that we can affect.2-1: Topic Turning Point Navigation for General Conversational Management No matter what subject you start talking about. positive.
Which Of these are Fun.. • Etc. and Interesting? That is the direction to go! Candidate Topics Figure 4. How do you move things in that direction? You can: • Ask a question • Make a comment • Make a joke • Quote someone you heard. Repeat. and then steer things in the correct direction.
3 The Model With Strategy And Tactics In Place D8-T23
As you make TTP choice after TTP choice (See Figure 4. Positive.. positive.3. (See Figure 4.3-2.)
Keep things moving in the direction of Fun.
.3-1: Moving Through Topics Using General Conversational Management Early in a conversation. and Interesting!
Figure 4. Do this for a while. the most important thing to do is to focus on moving thing in a direction that is .3. "fun. just keep thinking about where you can go that is "Fun. and Interesting". but in the early part of the conversation.. and interesting". you can work more towards certain topic areas.3-1. you get to an overall "area" that will work.3.).Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Later in the conversation.3. Positive. You are steering things towards the direction that you want the conversation to go. 4.
Even if you temporarily move away from that direction or end up in an area that is not very positive or interesting. and Interesting topics and subjects. keep steering in the right direction and in many cases you WILL get towards the right area soon enough (and if not.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
General Conversational Mgt Model
No matter where you start.
4. Positive.3. always move towards topics and subjects that are Fun. and Interesting!/
Figure 4. what was the main topic? Topics
. and write down the topic for each.3.3-2: General Conversational Management Model The most important direction to go. At some particular moment early in the conversation. Positive. especially early in a conversation. is towards Fun.4
Exercises and Assignments
Exercises for General Conversational Management 1) Think of some conversations that you have been in recently. maybe that person is not someone that you want to talk to anyway). or where you are.
For each of those Topics. Write each of those down. consider it a topic that leads to a TTP (copy each item above into the "Topic" area below). things you could comment on. list 6-8 different ways you could go. directions you could "take" the conversation (these are the TTP Options. or Candidate Topics). Topic TTP Options (Candidate Topics')
.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
2) Based on each of those topics. ask about.
. and Interesting")? Select two "candidates" and circle or highlight those two. which are the best? Which of these would move the conversation in a way that is best for you (think of "Fun.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3) Of the 6-8 different TTP Options you have written above for each Topic. 4) For each Topic. asking a question. what would it have been like to have moved the conversation in the direction of the first item you circled? Practice that out loud for each Topic above. etc. 5) Practice again on each by moving things in the direction of the second item that was circled. maybe by making a comment. making a statement. whatever it might take to move things in that direction.
whatever it takes. You then have to wonder . they will not go down a path of having a fun.1 ADVANCED CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Really Want. and people REALLY interested."
4. maybe offer an opinion. we can start to direct the conversation into an even BETTER area. look for moments where things can be "steered" in a certain way. don't worry. we want things to get even more
. start to take the conversation there! Ask a question. make a comment.5
Remember what was said earlier: • The overall direction of a conversation comes about due to a successive selection of TTPs (which normally occur at random. engaging. Make it so that it becomes easy for you to come up with a list of "options" very quickly. At any moment you should be able to think "Where can I go with this?". that no matter WHAT you do with some people. Building on what we learned in the last section. you can direct where the overall conversation goes. really be aware of the TTP opportunities in your day-to-day life. fascinating. but the REAL key is to at least get to the point where you can very quickly think of at least 1 or 2 ways to go that are Fun. and positive conversation. where COULD I have taken things".Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Assignments for General Conversational Management 1) For the next week or so. positive and interesting topics. Maybe start out by looking at conversation after the fact. D8-T33 D8-T33
We want the conversation to be more than just positive. After a while.4. or without an overall strategy in mind). even at the start of a conversation. Positive. Instead of the more general area of fun. Do this for a while until the process of finding 1 or 2 good "Ways to go" in a conversation (good TTP options) can happen very rapidly for you. interesting.
By moving things in this way. inquire about something. In general. we are turning you into someone that people LIKE to talk to! You know the type of person that people enjoy talking to. We want to focus the aim of our conversational management skills even more. 2) Now that you are able to quickly find 1 or 2 good TTP options. It WILL get easier. If this is a challenge for you. having conversations with. we want to work with topics that get the emotions involved. When talking to anyone. we want it to be really interesting. thinking "what COULD I have done.Is that the sort of person you want to talk to and spend time with? Maybe not.4 4.3. the more YOU can and will become that guy! 4. the conversation becomes more enjoyable for everyone. positive. Just do what you can so that the TTP shifts in a direction that is fun. Interesting. By manipulating TTPs from moment to moment. You may start to find however. interesting. and spending time with? The type of guy that people seek out to spend time with? The more you do these types of exercises. the imagination moving. you may have to think of 6-8 options. At first. etc.
there are many ways the conversation can move.)
General Conversational Management takes the conversation into the Fun.
Strategic Formula for Advanced Conversational Management To direct the conversation into even BETTER areas. (See Figure 4.1-1: Advanced Conversational Management Focuses the Steering From the start of a conversation. and steer using Advanced Conversational Management
Figure 4. and more involvement of the imagination. To move the conversation into more interesting areas. we were able to move things in the direction of Fun. We use our strategy of working with the TTPs. how do we work that in what we are doing moment-to-moment? How can we do things that will make that happen?
. you move it in ways that engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way.4. Now from that point. Positive. steer the conversation towards directions that engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way. we now shift our strategy of "steering" things to direct the topics in a more focused manner using Advanced Conversational Management. We move forward and want to get a more emotional tone. there are many ways to go.
From there. there were 4 main directions towards which a conversation may go. Positive.
With that as a general strategy. more excitement. to "steer" things even more towards what we want.
So we narrow our focus. Interesting area.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
interesting.4. Using General Conversational Management. and Interesting. So.1-1.
Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner? Move the conversation in that direction. 4.)
. Interesting Topics
Which of these "Engage the Emotions and imagination in a Positive Way"? That is the direction to go!
Figure 4. and Interesting" area. (See Figure 4. With that established. Positive. but now think "where can I go that will engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way".3-1 for an explanation.2 Steering Conversations Moment To Moment using Advanced Conversational Management D8-T35
Again.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course 4.) TTP Mantra " Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner?
Tactical Formula for Advanced Conversational Management Keep thinking .3 The Model With Advanced Strategy And Tactics In Place D8-T38
(Before we move on to looking at the model.4. we need to change the way the model is shown. and explain a bit more as to its meaning and interpretation. we need to use the TTP as a way to move things in the right direction.2-1: Topic Turning Point Navigation for Advanced Conversational Management After using General Conversational Management for a while. we shift the focus of how we navigate TTPs.4. Repeat. we can assume that we are talking about subjects which fit into the "Fun. and with that strategy in mind.
TTP Fun. See Figure 4.4. we look at the concept of the TTP.4. Positive.4.2-1.
the graphics we will use will show an even more "condensed" version of this process.
Figure 4.) the conversation moves on for a while. But after using the general techniques (Fun. The locations of points (1). these diagrams will indicate a VERY condensed version of the number of steps involved. This can result in so many possibilities (many thousands within a few steps) that it's important to look at these diagrams as a way to show "trend". where every "step" (TTP. we are not showing that there are exactly "four steps" between points (1) and (2). with thousands upon thousands of possible possible routes and outcomes. When starting from ANY topic (1) to a place where you are firmly established for a period of time in a Fun. the model above is what we used to show a starting point (1). For example. (2).Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Understanding the Conversational Management Model
The model attempts to show a process that has many many steps. so that the various stages of a conversation can be easily illustrated. At that point. etc. and (3) in the figure above (and in the next figure) helps to show this. It may happen in ten minutes.
. but a way to show a "trend". Positive. not an exact number of steps or outcomes. and it ends up at a certain area (2). From now on in the course. or topic shift) shown on the digram may represent many steps in an actual conversation.4. For example. Positive. once again ending up with thousands of topics that could be discussed by the time you get through more topic shifts (3). it may take ten.3-1: Understanding the Conversational Management Model The "levels" shown in the models are not meant to be exact. and Interesting conversation (2) may take four steps. there can be a whole "tree" of possibilities leading from there. In practice. or thirty.
For a while. Positive. General Conversational Management techniques are used. After that has been established.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
We started at one topic. the conversation will get better and better. If you follow these two simple strategies together (and the tactical approach of simply watching the TTPs and moving things in the right way). until it is firmly established that the conversation has engaged the emotions and imagination of the participant. subjects. And of course while doing that. if you use the language tools which we learned about earlier in the course. to yourself!
Advanced Conversational Management Model
Figure 4. 8.4. 10. feelings. This also is followed for a series of steps and a period of time. Although the diagram shows only 2 steps (for simplicity). This is shown between points (2) and (3). are used together to move forward in a conversation. 20. This too can take any number of steps. emotional topics. or 30 minutes. and states. only a few of which are shown in the diagram. The subjects will get more and more fascinating. the conversation will get more and more of an "emotional" tone to it.4. If you refer to Figure 4. and Interesting conversation (2). As time goes on.3-2: Advanced Conversational Management Model Early in the conversation. or however long it takes to be firmly established in a Fun.3-2. 10 topic shifts. in practice it may be good to follow a series of topics for 5.
. Then a shift is made towards focusing the conversation even more using Advanced Conversational Management. This is shown from point (1) to point (2) in the diagram. and then Advanced Conversational Management. exciting. and could be at any of thousands of topics after 6. Now the emphasis is on ways to "Engage the Emotions and Imagination in a Positive Way". we now focus more on moving in a direction that will "Engage the Emotions and Imagination in a Positive Way". you end up linking and associating many fascinating. you can see how General Conversational Management. we focused the conversation towards moving things in a direction that is "Fun Positive and Interesting.
or Candidate Topics). and write down the topic for each.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
4. list 6-8 different ways you could go. positive. Write each of those down. These should be conversations where it is already obvious that it is a fun.4. consider it a topic that leads to a TTP (copy each above into the "Topic" areas below). At some particular moment in that conversation.4
Exercises and Assignments
Exercises for Advanced Conversational Management 1) Think of some conversations that you have been in recently. Topic a. directions you could "take" the conversation (these are the TTP Options. and interesting conversation. things you could comment on. For each of those Topics. what was the main topic? Topics
2) Based on each of those topics. TTP Options (Candidate Topics')
. ask about.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
make a comment.. but be especially aware of wanting to move things to "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way"..
D8-T46 D8-T47 D8-T47
As you can see. It WILL get easier. maybe by making a comment. we focus further on the TTP options!
.. what next? At some point in the conversation.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
3) Of the 6-8 different TTP Options you have written above for each Topic.
4) For each Topic. we are "steering" things more and more in a direction that we wish to go. until the process of finding 1 or 2 ways to go that "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way" in a conversation can happen very rapidly for you.
5) Practice again on each by moving things in the direction of the second item that was circled. maybe offer an opinion. If this is a challenge for you. even things with some degree of sensual connotation to them. positive. and interesting.4. don't worry. 2) Now that you are able to quickly find 1 or 2 good TTP options for yourself that "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way". whatever it takes. but the REAL key is to at least get to the point where you can very quickly think of at least 1 or 2 ways to go that "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way". start to take the conversation there! Ask a question. thinking "what COULD I have done. where COULD I have taken things". fascinating.5. Maybe start out by looking at conversation after the fact. making a statement. At first. we want to steer things more towards romantic.5 4.
4. Just do what you can so that the TTP shifts in a direction that can "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way".
Assignments for Advanced Conversational Management 1) For the next week or so. which 1 or 2 would tend to "Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way"? Which ones move things in a way that is best for you? Select two "candidates" and circle or highlight these two. Do this for a while.1
Summary MORE ADVANCED CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT More About Getting The Conversation To Go Where You Really Want. This is best when applied to a conversation that is ALREADY fun. So. really be aware of the TTP opportunities in your day-to-day life. what would it have been like to have moved the conversation in the direction of the first item you circled? Practice that out loud for each Topic above. whatever it might take to move things in that direction. once again. etc.5 4. you may have to think of 6-8 options. seductive things. So. inquire about something. asking a question.
5.5. Fascinating. fascinating. This gets her mind into thinking more and more about these things. steer the conversation towards romantic.2-1: Topic Turning Point Navigation for More Advanced Conversational Management After using General and Advanced Conversational Management. Repeat.3 The Model With More Advanced Strategy And Tactics In Place D8-T52
We are just closing in. However. and seductive things. fascinating.5. you will have taken things in the right direction and this will be much easier. and then topics that engage the emotions and imagination. and followed the other strategies and tactics shown earlier. Moving towards romantic.
4. and focusing more and more towards areas and topics that work.2-1.5. The focus now is upon topics that get you closer towards Romantic. seductive things?"
Figure 4. seductive things is much easier after you have first move towards fun. then the focus shifts again towards directing things in a specific way.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Strategic Formula for More Advanced Conversational Management To further direct the conversation into even BETTER areas. Seductive things
Tactical Formula for More Advanced Conversational Management Keep thinking .
This may seem odd or hard to do.3-1. if you have been in a conversation for a while. seductive things?" Move the conversation in that direction. fascinating.2
Steering Conversations Using More Advanced Conversational Management
TTP Mantra (See Figure 4. and associating YOU with them! (See Figure 4.)
.) "Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic. positive and interesting thing."Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic.5. 4. fascinating.
there is a different focus at each stage. moving to point (4)
. General Conversational Management techniques place the focus on selecting items that are Fun. and Seductive. and Interesting. the focus moves towards selecting items based on More Advanced Conversational Management. moving to point (3).. Then the Advanced Conversational Management Techniques place the focus more upon items that involve the Emotions and Imagination in a Positive Way.3-1: More Advanced Conversational Management Model As the conversation progresses. Early on.5. which targets topics and subjects that are Romantic.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
More Advanced Conversational Management Model
Figure 4. Positive. Fascinating. shown from point (1) to (2). After that type of conversation has been established (3).
to a positive one. and then .6.1 The 1-Shot Beeline Fallacy D9-T2
Guys assume that they will travel from a general topic.)
The Dream that Does Not Happen!
Figure 4. and get things to be more and more fascinating and exciting. the way it really DOES happen.1-1. This hardly ever ever happens.
.6. 4. that they will get an AMAZING reaction in their first movement across the Model.1-1: The Dream of a 1-Shot Path To Success! A common misperception is that many guys think that if they can just move a conversation from the start. Moreover.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
4. and then an emotional one.6. Too many guys are too caught up in this one-shot dream of traveling once across the model and getting an amazing result. will work in your favor. then a sensual one.MAGIC! However that is NOT the way it works in the real world.6
Using these Conversational Management skills in the real world may be quite different in practice from the way most guys "think" it will happen. (See Figure 4.
Maybe several times. Just start the process again. here is how this works. This actually works better! We are actually using Fractionation. (See Figure 4.6. Then at some point. you back off. g) Do the whole process over and over. Use the language tools. no matter how the conversation jumps around..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
4. Of if you can't seem to get to a good place.. Great! Talk about that for a while.6. moving through the model towards the right. If you get to a very good place.2
How Fractionation Works
The real world has stops. you may jump back just several steps in our Conversational Management Process. Have fun. So.31. Start at any topic (you are on the far left side of the Model) Move forward towards the right.6. and fascinating and seductive topics.. you go back towards something more "normal". you are always moving towards positive topics.. You might do that on your own. So. Maybe you move all the way back to a very "normal" topic (which would be all the way on the left side of the model).. In this way. Then you "back up" to some extent (even all the way back to a very general topic area) and then move forward across the model again.. You just start the process again. and then . Because no matter where you start from.. No problem. The conversation starts.. e) Then move back (towards the left side of the model) This may happen because: • The person you are talking to does that (she asks a question) • Or maybe you do it (just to lighten things up) f) Then start again. etc. the conversation ends up being very interesting and fascinating! 4. Maybe you start from a very general topic and get all the way through the model towards a very very fascinating topic or subject. You back up to a more general topic. no matter where you start. and then at some point. or maybe the conversation shifts back to that place due to something she says. you take a conversation from the early stages through the process. This actually ADDS to the power and effectiveness of what you are doing. stay there and talk about it for a while. starts.. restarts. goes for some distance through the model (maybe all the way through).) a) b) c) d)
. This is where a process is done repeatedly over and over..3 Using Conversational Fractionation D9-T5
Start at some normal topic and move through the model towards the right. emotional and imaginative topics. When we say "go back". No problem. using the Conversational Management techniques Get as far through the model as you can. move on to the next step. And again.
Fractionation happens at times because even when you may be at a fairly good place for a while (8).6. there is no such thing as a conversational "Dead End"!
. at times maybe they move towards an area that is not too good (2). over time. it ends up being fun. This is not a problem. interesting. You become one of those fascinating guys. The overall trend is that. it's not a bad idea to back up a bit (9) and then move forward again. that no matter WHAT you talk about.4 Dead Ends Come Back To Life! D9-T6
With this new strategy of using Conversational Fractionation. As time goes on (5-12) the conversation gets into better and better areas. simply back up (3) and then try moving into a better direction (4).6. there is a continued movement up and into better and better areas of conversation. As things move forward from (1). and fascinating! 4.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Conversational Fractionation at Work
Figure 4.3-1: How Conversation Fractionation Works on the Model Follow the conversation as it moves from (1) to (12).
this can happen.. how do we pull this together? 4.7. Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner? Move things in that direction. Where can I go that is fun. • What if you can't make the conversation positive? • What if she always points out the negative aspect? • What if there is NO emotional engagement at ALL? Well.. and go down another path! 4..2 What If The Outcome Is Not What You Expected? D9-T9
Despite your best efforts. you just back up. and get the effect.7. use the language tools.. or maybe negative. positive.. No problem. you might have just found out that they are NOT someone you want to spend time with! That's not a total loss because you STILL learned more. talked more. etc.7 CONVERSATIONAL OVERVIEW AND REVIEW D9-T7
So. seductive things? Move things in that direction. uninteresting. Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic. and the person becomes interested and fascinated... Do that for a while and then think . o Comment on what is around o Mention common items. o If you get to a good subject or topic.. Just back up. Do that for a while and then think . use the language tools as much as possible! D9-T8
• • • • • • • •
Keep moving the conversation into these interesting fascinating areas . stay there for a while. or what you both have in common Move forward with the Strategies and Tactics in mind. and interesting? Move things in that direction..7.3 Summary D9-T10
Go have fun with these tools!
.1 • Conversational Management Approach Start on just about ANY subject. have more material to use in conversations in the future! 4. back up a few steps. When on good topics. —* The entire time: o If you hit a "dead end". and use the Strategy and Tactics of the Conversational Management techniques! Look at "Dead Ends" as being just like a bad turn on a road.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
If you happen to take a "wrong turn" somehow and get into an area of discussion that is boring. (think of your TTP options). with you! 4. fascinating.
fun. You want to be able to discuss these topics easily.. What do you talk about? There is no substitute for experience. what can we do here in this course to help you? We have talked about the way to talk and use language. and then the more "material" you will have.. we have talked about managing conversations. However. You will be able to say things like "I was talking to someone about this the other day. if using those language tools is problem for you. Topics • • 5. and while talking about subjects and topics that YOU are really passionate about. and it's even better if you are passionate about those topics. fascinating. and closer towards the subjects that will really serve your intent.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
5. this is something we can and will work on with you. Most men may not be very familiar with many of the topics that we REALLY want to get into.) Before you can use the language tools with new subjects that you are learning about. Themes vs.great! It's easier to use the language tools if you are discussing topics with which you are familiar. you should be able to use them with subjects in which you are already interested!
. go ahead and practice! (Or maybe do that the next time you go through the course. and that statement (regarding having actually talked to someone about the topics) will be TRUE! So. Can you talk passionately about something? Anything? Hopefully. and some familiarity with this type of thing. The more experience you get. Talking about these topics may be a challenge for many men. and THEY said. especially as they get more interesting. the easier it will get. then you may want to go back in those earlier sections. A topic is a particular area of discussion that is taking place in a moment.". Now we want you to become familiar with topics that will really work well for you! We are going to work with some of these topics.0
D9-T11 What do you talk about? As the conversation gets more interesting. the more familiar you will be with these topics. so that YOU have some material. to get the best effect you will have to be a PART of that conversation and familiar with the topics that may come up. yes! How well can you talk about topics that YOU are passionate about while using many of the language tools we talked about in the earlier parts of the course? If you can do that very well . However. the more you talk to people about such things. fascinating. some practice.1 Themes are a way through a discussion or through the "tree of subjects" that we showed earlier. TOPICS OF ENTHUSIASM AND PASSION D9-T14
What are you passionate about? Few things are more compelling in a person than for them to be passionate about something (hopefully many things) in life. In the meantime.
. These are called "Seduction Oriented Topics".just TALKING about these can create a good effect. The conversational management sections will help you to move the conversation in a way that will get you near these topics areas.2 SEDUCTION ORIENTED TOPICS D9-T15
In the context of this course (and your intent in talking with . or cleaning the toilet.. or. but a good number of them. work it. SOTs are the "end goals" when it comes to managing or directing a conversation. or sports. sensual. Your point is to get to. and seductive.. Seduction Oriented Topics (SOTs) .. You may talk about cars. Examples of SOTs • Connections • Going for it • Making good decisions • Surrendering to feelings • Getting excited • Feeling excited • Trusting your judgment • Taking chances • Indulgence • Maturity • Good decisions • . (Every guy has his favorites and ones that work best for him. 5.Topics that bring up images and thoughts that are romantic. in some ways. judge for yourself. feelings. in the right way Use the language tools!
You want to be familiar with these topics (SOTs) and able to discuss them easily: maybe not ALL of them. and link it to you! When • • • • • you are at or near an SOT: Use the correct tone of Voice Pace and Lead correctly Link things to you Point at the right times. but how effective are those as subjects given the "purpose" of the discussion? You want to discuss topics and things which deal with seduction. stay there as long as you can! Talk about it.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
So. someone) some topics are easier to work with than others.. How good are you at the earlier sections that dealt with the language tools? It may be a good idea to go back over those sections. Topics that access emotions. or topics that are very close to that concept. or near. or the office.. a topic that is an SOT. can create an AMAZING effect! When you do get a conversation into an area near an SOT. etc. and emphasize discussing topics in which YOU are interested and passionate about. excitement. You want to be able to discuss topics that deal on some level with Seduction. but doing so while using the language tools..
or even watched in a movie! (Or heard in a course that you took . You can use some of those that were listed earlier if you wish. or in movies. or seduction per se. Think of SOME way to discuss these. Meaning. keep it there. or comment on them! Talk aloud for several minutes about each. but the more you think about them. easily. or anything like that. the easier it will get!
Strategic Formula for Seduction Oriented Topics SOTs are topics that.
Exercises for Seduction Oriented Topics 1) Build your own list of SOTs. Think about other topics you have heard mentioned in this program. have stories about them. and also topics that you have heard in other materials and products that you have. you JUST need to be able to talk. read. Or are taking!) . Get the conversation there. 3) Practice talking about each aloud.
Assignments for Seduction Oriented Topics 1) Pay attention to conversations in your life (even things you hear on the radio. by there very nature. or overhear from others) and listen for when any of these SOTs come up in conversation. and discuss these subjects. bring up images and thoughts that may work for you. talk about something you heard. the more you work with the materials. or on TV. Don't worry about talking to women. and hopefully add some of your own..
. Seduction Oriented Topics
2) You must become familiar with these! You must be able to talk about them. hopefully some way that involves you and your own life. or ask questions. you will be able to just "talk" about the subject while using the tools that are available. and without "thinking" about the language tools. ask about them.. and while there.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
These topics may seem foreign to you. or joke about them. the more you practice using the tools. the easier it will be to "riff" on these using the language tools. using as many of the language tools as you can. the more you practice. Write down your list of SOTs.Are you able to somehow relate to these in your own life? Maybe something you read or heard? Maybe questions you can ask? ANYTHING?!?!? You do not need to "know" a lot about these topics or be an expert. Eventually. use as many of the language tools as you can. and the more you talk to and with people about them. Or..
However. show interest. They started and became more and more familiar with these topics. it gets easier to enter into more conversations that deal with these topics. Maybe ask some questions about things that deal with your SOTs. what is said. I can tell you that it DOES get easier and easier to be able to talk about these things. quote. but as long as you start it. and start to get your brain working on them. Then you get to hear MORE people talk about them. 5. "the other day I heard someone talking about. what people think.
. after having worked with hundreds of guys. and easily come up with 6-8 related topics. ask an opinion. That is understandable. These are called Expanded SOTs (SOTXs). and makes it easier for you to talk about them. Use as many of the language tools as you can. but this time with SOTs. So can you. (As in.SOTXs D9-T24
What if you had not just 10 ways of discussing "Seduction Oriented" subjects. Really! Learning to discuss such things may start out slowly. this process must start somewhere. However. it WILL get easier. You listen more to when they are discussed. Because of that."). You start to listen and take notice of when these are discussed. this is one of the key challenges that many guys face. We learned how you can move from any topic.
See? We are working on a process to get you to become more comfortable and familiar with these things. That's what we want to do here. Make special note of topics that are CLOSE or similar to these SOTs in some way. the more you listen. and frankly. ask. That makes you really think about them. The more you hear. etc.. anything at all! Talk. 2) Now . or even just TRY to do so. It may start a bit slowly and awkwardly. Many guys who can now talk about these things VERY easily and comfortably started from a place of having NO idea of what to say! They changed. You do a few exercises to talk about them.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course Listen to what is being said. but we are walking you through (at least the first steps of) the process to make this easier: • • • • • • • • • • • You have made a list of SOTs.3 EXPANDED SEDUCTION ORIENTED TOPICS . They did it. and move through these exercises and assignments. discuss. And that gives you MORE material to talk about! Which make it easier for you to enter into more conversations about these subjects and topics.Talk about these subjects and topics! Make a point to enter into a discussion when one of your SOTs is mentioned. but had even more? Maybe 50? What if that was easy and familiar for you? Think back to how we looked at topics earlier. make a comment. That gives YOU more familiarity with discussing them.
SOT Summary I KNOW that these topics may seem foreign to you.. then the more material YOU will have to talk about.. or even when anything CLOSE to one of your SOTs is discussed. ask what something means.
and build a whole list of very similar things to talk about -which are SOTXs! For example.. if friends.. However as we see here. see Figure 5.... SOT Connections SOTX Connections with family Connections with friends Connections with coworkers Connections with pets Connections with a girlfriend Connections with someone you just met Connections with someone while on vacation Connections with music Connections with your teammates
Many guys worry about talking about something like "Connections".with your teammates
Figure 5. you can take any SOT..with friends . can you think of different aspects of that? Parts of Connections? Questions about Connections? Ways of experiencing Connections? People or things with which you can experience Connections? By asking those types of questions (to yourself). (Does that diagram look familiar?)
If "Connections" is an SOT.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
Expanding on a Topic Area "Connections" is an SOT. there are many different types or examples of connecting to people. comes up in a conversation.. Then. They think of only one way of talking about that subject.with someone while on vacation .. etc. (You do not really need to list "connections with" for each..with family . it's easy to think of several different aspects of that topic or related topics. you can talk about that for while. family. you now have 6-8 ways to discuss it.with a girlfriend . or only one aspect of that to discuss (connections in a romantic or sensual context).with pets ... That is one subject.with coworkers . Instead of worrying about getting to that one topic (SOT) in a certain way. Look at the list above. how easy would it be to talk about how you CONNECT with those? And if you talk about
..with someone you just met .3-1. how we discussed a Topic Turning Point?) If Connections is a particular subject. and things that can be discussed. the SOTX list consists of all of these items shown in the diagram and listed below.. pets.3-1: How SOTs are related to an SOTXs. That just makes it easier for our example below).. places. but can you think of 6-8 different aspects of this? (Remember what we did in the earlier sections.with music . coworkers.... For any given SOT.
c. a. if someone is talking about pets... ask a question. Just make a comment. that you just met! When you expand SOTs in this way.. this is a TTP diagram in reverse!)
For example.to . SOTs " SOTXs List
. If you talk about that for a while. or how that topic can be experienced. or maybe even someone. then you can shift towards ANOTHER type of "connection" very easily! (See Figure 5. and how you (or someone else) can connect with a pet. then you can shift to talking about "how you can connect with a pet" fairly easily.3-2. (Yes. or different aspects of that topic. it's very easy to then shift..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
THAT (how you connect in that manner) for a while. you are to list 5 (at least) related topics. or a special person. point out an example regarding pets. how to connect with people..3-2: SOTXs Can Lead Into SOTs If any of the topics in the SOTX list comes up in conversation. b. This is your SOTX list. all of a sudden there are many MORE ways to get to these really GREAT topics!
Exercises f o r Expanded Seduction Oriented T o p i c s 1) Take the SOT list you had earlier (copy those down into the first column below. etc.)
Family Friends Coworkers Pets Connections A girlfriend Someone you just met Someone met on vacation Music Teammates Figure 5.) and for each SOT. you can be as close as one step away from an SOT..
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
That gives you a LOT of flexibility in conversations!
. and see if you can then focus what you are saying towards the SOT itself. (Like the earlier example. then about connecting in general.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
2) Now for each SOTX.)
3) Do the same thing again. Talk about that SOTX for a moment or two. practice talking about it out loud.
Step back and look at what you have done! You have 10 SOTs with which YOU are familiar. then about connecting with pets. You have 50 SOTXs that you are now familiar with as well. you talk about pets. but now do so while using the language tools.
with music .4-1: SOTXs Are The Pathways To SOTs
SOTXs are an easy way to get towards SOTs. See if you can move the conversation a bit towards the SOT itself. concept of "topics related to a topic" in many many places. or anything like them mentioned.with coworkers . However.with family .. broke it into bits and pieces that you can learn and do as exercises.with friends . Maybe you will even start to notice SOTXs that were not even ON your list. but it IS related to an SOT that I have worked with". SOTXs are now like "conversational landmarks" for you in terms of navigating a conversation.. Good speakers. D9-T32
We discussed how to develop an SOTX list from an SOT.... the easier it will be to notice SOTXs. especially politicians and activists. In addition.. and move the conversation towards SOTs. use such techniques a LOT..
Summary You now have MORE material to work with than you ever thought possible! This is not about memorizing. you know that you are very close to getting near a subject area that will work very well for you.with someone while on vacation ... modeled the process arid the steps involved.. "I didn't list that SOTX. spotting these opportunities get easier and easier. if you hear any of them mentioned... It ALL gets easier! 2) Start to "direct" the conversations you encounter where your SOTXs are mentioned. If anything like an SOTX comes up in a conversation.. and then built upon that step by step.4 CONVERSATIONAL MODEL WITH SOTXs. it's about getting YOU comfortable and familiar with these topics. We have broken these down.
.. The more familiar you are with these subjects. that process can work both ways.with pets Connections .with a girlfriend .4-1..with someone you just met .
.. 5.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Assignments for Expanded Seduction Oriented Topics 1) Look at all of your SOTXs! That's a LOT of subjects! Pay attention in your life to see how often any of those items come up in conversation (or maybe you just hear them somewhere).. The techniques that you have learned are the sort of things that many people do naturally.. use the language tools if and whenever you can.with your teammates Family Friends Coworkers Pets A girlfriend Someone you just met Someone met on vacation Music Teammates Connections
This is how we developed SOTXs
This is the most useful way of thinking of SOTXs Figure 5. The real usefulness of this is when you reverse the order as shown in Figure 5. You will start to notice this. . it is easy to then move the conversation towards topics that will work better for you (SOTs). The more you work with this. You may think.
you have already worked with 10 SOTs and 50 SOTXs as shown in Figure 5. As the topics get better and better.4-2: Your Multiple Pathways to SOTs! Now that you have worked with 10 SOTs. It's to have you practice and become familiar with them. The point here (again) is not to memorize the SOTs.. to be able to notice when you are talking about things which are "close to" topics that will work well for you. you will get closer and closer to SOTXs. you have started to train yourself to "recognize" these landmarks. we can then show them as part of our Conversational Model.the number that YOU have actually worked with so far!
Since SOTXs and SOTs are the "goals" in terms of managing a conversation. and for you to just start to "recognize" these things on your own . we have had to compress or simplify them quite a bit and show only a fraction of the actual steps and numbers involved so that the diagrams do not become too large or complex. you now see how easy it can be to move over to an SOT! In fact. there are really 50 SOTXs and 10 SOTs shown . After all.4-2. If you have followed the program. that is not an abbreviation or exaggeration. Figure 5. or the SOTXs. In many of the diagrams.
Figure 5. and done the exercises and assignments.4-3 shows this in the model itself. However in the figure above. and then towards SOTs. that this process will now be easier than you may have imagined. this will start to happen for you. and 50 SOTXs (in the earlier exercises) you now have many many SOTXs with which YOU are familiar! More importantly. and anything like an SOTX comes up in the discussion.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
So whenever you are having a conversation.without "thinking" about them. you have practiced with so many of these SOTXs.
Listen for SOTXs Anything near or related to an SOT.5
THE COMPLETE CONVERSATIONAL MODEL
Start from any topic and get to where you want! Yes. You can start from almost ANYWHERE. then start to pay attention for SOTXs. and ANY TOPIC. When you get to an SOTx.
5. which are topics near or related to seduction (a step or two away from SOTs). or as close as you can towards SOTs. and topics that are close to that (SOTXs).)
. Stay there for a while if you can!
Figure 5.4-3: SOTs Are THE Goals in Conversational Management As you move through a conversation. or anything that is "related" to an SOT. just follow the steps listed earlier in the Conversational Management sections. then you can simply move things towards a topic that is very seduction-oriented! The point is not to have a "list" in mind. SOTXs are a pathway to make that easier. Period.. and using this type of approach you will have fascinating conversations with people that lead to where YOU want to go! (See Figure 5. you can start from just about ANY topic and get to GREAT topics! It's easy.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
SOTs in the Conversational Management Model
The end goal is to get to. Then move the conversation towards an SOT! This works.
Move towards SOTs. you start to "listen" for topics that are SOTXs.5-1. it's that you have trained yourself to recognize things that are SOTs.
Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Figure 5.5-1: The Complete Conversational Management Model (continued on next page)
Romantic.. Fractionate If you take a wrong turn. fascinating.Fun. or very close!
. back up! If you move back to a general topic. exciting.Engaging the emotions and imagination in a positive way .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Figure 5. or SOTX. Steer towards ... seductive things Direct the Conversation Pay attention when Good Subjects come up (SOTXs) Listen for anything a step or two away from an SOT Move towards SOTs Stay there as long as you can Use The Language Tools! As much as possible.5-1: The Complete Conversational Management Model (continued) Start a Conversation Manage the Conversation Move the Conversation in a Good Direction Steer towards . interesting . Especially when at or near SOTXs and SOTs. Steer towards . and see how easy it is to get to some good topic that is an SOT... start over!
Assignment! 1) Try it! Start directing conversations using the conversational management model..
diagram. The navigation is handled through our use of Conversational Management techniques. "how can I get to my pattern". get her to "experience" good feelings and states o Use the Conversational Management Techniques to get there o Get her to think about good and/or exciting feelings
. and as "a way of speaking". "A plan" or "model".
The Pattern Formula in detail. we work in that manner.0
6. Its just a "type" of talking that you can (and will be able to) use when you feel it is appropriate. asking. THAT ends up being a very effective way to create "patterns".Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
6. and being aware of when you DO get to an area of conversation that does allow you to use a pattern.2 PATTERN FORMULA D10-T7
Tactical Formula for Patterns While talking to a woman. Use the language tools. etc.Many of the details of driving a car are things you just "do". or navigation. Examples/Analogies: • Sports . certain actions. plus these areas will work for HER because SHE selected them (in a manner of speaking) • Talk and manage the conversation into an area that DOES work for you. • Instead. the clutch.You don't play the entire game ahead of time. • While talking to a woman. A representative sample. Amplify these feelings and states by talking. It's best to just think of patterns as examples. With this new approach to learning and using these tools. Link and associate these feelings to you. Once you actually play the game though. clarifying. Don't think of "how can I get to the pattern". or series of actions. Present a Call to action. or "how can I bring up a pattern that I know". you make decisions on-the-spot as to what to do and how to proceed. get her to "experience" good feelings and states. • Maybe talk to a woman and allow HER to bring up things that end up working well in pattern-like language. A New way of thinking about the use of patterns • The wrong way is to talk to someone and to keep thinking. • Driving .1
PATTERN OVERVIEW D10-T1
What is a pattern? • A plan. You practice bits and pieces of the sport. You don't have to think about moving the wheel. or model to be followed in making things. or could say. or "how can I bring this pattern up". 6. handling the gas pedal. In the same manner. • An example of what you can say. we have practiced the small details (language skills) so that these are automatic. We practice specific parts of areas of the skills we wish to use later on. that's the key. These smaller skills become automatic and you focus instead of driving. think about having a conversation (and managing it correctly). She may take the conversation into better places that you could have predicted. Patterns are just examples of the use of these tools.
but they assume that you are in a conversation where they will work and be somewhat "appropriate" to what is being discussed. However.4 PATTERN RIFFING IN REAL-TIME D10-T13
This is the ability to just create pattern language on-the-fly. these canned patterns DO have some usefulness.3 CANNED PATTERNS D10-T12
These are the pre-rehearsed. Pre-written. Their best use is when you use the Conversational Management techniques and then find that the conversation just happens to get to or near a pattern that you DO happen to know already. when you are talking to a woman. Therefore it is best to maybe have some of these memorized.. So. o Use "this" and "these" (be aware of that and those as well) o Point and mark appropriately Present a Call to action o "Do it now" language o Create a Challenge o Create an Opportunity o Talk about the chance to "Seize the moment" o A simple add-on to the Language Tools
There are two main ways of doing patterns. if you just "drop" a pattern into the conversation. many times it does not. they can. In THAT case . • The interesting topic that she and you are discussing o what is happening o what you know
. In the real world. "this person. sound quite strange. The problem is if you are SO focused on just "getting to the pattern" that you know (or even one of many that you know) then it's difficult to have a good conversation. The good ways to use these are as teaching and learning tools. 6. 6.these pre-written or canned patterns can work very well. clarifying o Use the Language Tools o Asking her for info. and that the woman will react to what the patterns is about. or things you have read. Some times that does happen. and to use what is needed in the moment. and the proper context is not created. etc Link and associate those feelings to you o Use the Language Tools o Use linkage phrases like "now with me". for her to elaborate and describe o Repeating back what she has said o Provide examples from your own life o Provide examples from friends. and have them there for your use if and when the correct situation comes up. don't focus TOO much on them. canned patterns are good." etc. "Canned" patterns.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
o Get her feeling good and/or exciting feelings o Get her experiencing (or recall the experience of) good and/or exciting feelings o Get her to think about things that she wants or desires Amplify these feelings and states by talking. asking. because doing so may work against you. pre-written patterns that you have seen and heard. pre-rehearsed. and real-time "Riffing". and do. But... what you need to do is to look at.
it really IS that easy! look for: Positive emotions and feeling Positive sensations (as in physical ones) Exciting feelings.. using the tools. emotions. and actions in the conversation. Then you have a conversation and.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
o what she is reacting to o and discuss things which are appropriate. Then we use those as a basis for discussion. Wanting to take action or seize an opportunity
Always • • • •
See the pattern here? We are in general. THE BEST PATTERN IS THIS: • • Get her to talk and think about positive.. and and use the language tools. exciting. states. get her to. interesting.
. • Talk about these things or listen to you talk about these things • get her to think about these things • get her to feel these things • get her to link them to you. • Use some "act now" languaging. and sensual things. Use the language tools so that YOU become associated with those things. Yes. looking and listening for positive feelings.
but the method of approaching it is very different. Talk about something positive and interesting c.0
7. a. fifth. 1. DO THE EXERCISES. Get the conversation into good subjects (SOTXs. comfort in. AND FOLLOW THE COURSE. Both you and her talk! 2. Use the conversational management techniques b. Use the Language Tools 7. and/or compulsion to act a. Fractionate if and when needed. and the more engaged you are in the process. Whether its your first. Use the Language Tools 5. 3. Keep the conversation going. We really are focused upon changing you.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
7. 7. focusing first on small details.1
REVIEW AND SUMMARY
The course has followed a "bottom-up" approach to training. Use the conversational management techniques b. SOTs) 4. of fourteenth time through.4 BE WILLING AND PREPARED TO PUT ENERGY INTO THIS COURSE. 7.5 CONGRATULATIONS! WELL DONE! D10-T29
. It really is up to you. Now we can look from the "top-down". and view an overall strategy. D10-T28
The more energy and effort you put into this. Direct the conversation in a way that takes you toward good topics a. D10-T27
Listen to the full explanations. Create a willingness. Direct and/or link those feelings towards you. Engage her emotions and imagination in a positive way. you will benefit. and how you speak. the greater your results will be.3 LISTEN. 7. Keep her there and keep talking! a. and really take the time to do the exercises. -' d. a.2 SUMMARY D10-T26
This may be similar to information you have heard in the past. and then building up to bigger and bigger pieces.
EXAMPLES. and provide you with some real-world examples of their use. EXAMPLES
The discussions presented on the audio for this section are intentionally "casual" to familiarize you even more with the use of these tools.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
and charismatic presence. • Nose. • Be descriptive.. • Instantaneously " Suddenly • Find Yourself • Convince Yourself • Suppose • Imagine " Mysterious (-ly) • Wonder (-ous) (-ously) Weasel Phrases Use Weasel Phrases to keep the conversation going... • What's it like when . allowing you to say more (and maybe more provocative things) about a subject. to be cool. • Passionate or Boring?
LANGUAGE TOOLS A N T D E T A I L S o Adjectives And Adverbs Use more adjectives and adverbs in your speech to appeal to and excite the emotional side of the listener. Mouth. Voice Tone And Tonality Use your best tone of voice (speaking from your chest) to convey a relaxed.
.... and well-placed pauses. Fast.. and to "soften " the way in which something is said.. emotions. to convey a sense of drama and intrigue in what you are saying in a way that "captivates "people and makes them want to listen to you. • Slow. so that their feelings. Pause? Energy And Enthusiasm Using energy and enthusiasm when speaking so that people can become energized and enthusiastic about listening to and being with you.. and processes awaken. " As you. use Adjectives And Adverbs Trance Words Help to get the subconscious mind of the listener to be more of apart of your conversation.. • If I were to . powerful. • If you were to .Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
APPENDIX 1 Course "Cheat Sheet"
• SPEAKING POINTERS o The "Cool" Factor You don't have to be cold. or Chest? Pacing And Pausing Use variations in pace. • Have you ever .
• Use "That" and "Those" when referring to anything negative.. Point away • Positive statement.. etc. Easy Linking Expanded Pointing With This. • Can you do this now. laugh. Point to you • Negative statement. Point to you • Negative Say "those". Easy Anchoring When the person you are talking with displays a positive feeling of some type.
MORE TOOLS o Pointing And Gestures Move. Say "these". a smile. Linking After getting someone to experience good feelings and emotions. to create a compelling will on the part of the listener follow you and listen to you.. point or gesture towards yourself. link them to you so that YOU become something and someone that they feel good about • Now with me • In me • In myself • with this • these • this belief • these feelings Easy-Linking • Use "This" and "These" when referring to anything positive. interest. motion.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Embedded Commands Use embedded commands repeatedly and in the proper context. Point away. Say "that". • Move! Point! Linking Gestures Towards And Away • Whenever you say something negative. • Whenever you say something positive. intrigue. Those • Positive statement. Say "this". gesture. point or gesture away. These. That. touch them to help anchor it to you. allowing you to move things more in your favor later on
. and accentuate what you are saying in order to be more compelling as a speaker and to get even more attention from your listener or audience. • Point Or Touch On Positive
LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES o Pace And Lead Pacing and Leading allows you "be " in the conversation for a while and gain rapport and information.
the More Y. etc. B.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Show agreement. Listing • General Listing General Listing is a way to quickly provide several reason. or giving an example.) • Then you will "Y" Where "Y" is something you want them to experience (Lead) o Give Them A Reason Giving a reason will make people more apt to do things for you and agree with you. and C When making a point. statement. and/or interest. experiences. B. which support your point • A. Compare And Contrast Use this technique to keep the conversation going. and c When giving examples or options to someone. "List" several things or examples which support your point. a way that you want.Burying Items is a way to mention an outrageous or very direct option for "testing" purposes. or thoughts) use "More and More " as a way to string them together (and increase your chances of that happening • The more X. More And More If you want to lead someone through a series of steps (actions. • Request X because (of) Y. statement. and C When making a point. • a.another option
. in order to provide more power to what you are saying • At The End Listing at The End is a way to provide several options (which may differ) but to emphasize the option that YOU want. the More Y. thoughts. • As you X. the More Z. Then start to move or shift things in a different way. you can get away with an outrageous or very direct option by burying that option in the middle of a List. or to maybe see if you can get someone to agree to it! • a. etc. and incorporate the language tools • This thing vs that thing • How two things are similar • How two things are different • Good . "List" several things briefly in order. b. the more Y. acknowledgement.Bad • One option . or giving an example. keep the discussion focused on a topic that serves your purposes. The more Y. The More Z. • Topics and Subjects • Mindset or Frame of Mind • Current Reality • As (while) you are "X" (Pace) Where "X" is something that is true in their current reality (perceptions. etc. understanding. but mention the one which YOU want to put the most emphasis on. LAST • Burying Items Listing .
.\ Universal Wants You can assume that most people want these. do it. or show it. and evoke favorable states. or adventurous.. • If you can . or fun.... and beliefs. to be a way for them to get what they want.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Parts Of A Subject Discussing many of the parts of a subject keeps the conversation going. • Using Their Own Processes • Find or assume what someone wants • Create an opportunity for them to get it or demonstrate they have it • Make that "demonstration" work in your favor. • Break it down into its component parts and discuss them.. • Use the language tools in the discussion. • Find a way to map what YOU want.. discuss. • Challenge them to demonstrate it.. idea.. • You seem as if.. • Are you able to . • Maybe you can .. • The smart people I know. can (use smart... or want to be perceived as having? • Talk to them and find out. • I wonder if you can .. Parts Of A Person Use Parts of a Person as a way to find.
... • Take any subject. • You seem like .. • You might. feelings. • Link good thoughts... even when the other person claims or demonstrates that such parts are NOT there • For every part of a person that will work against you.. feelings and emotions. • Challenge them to do that.. • You might see .
Opportunities And Challenges • Find out what someone wants. • Confidence • Maturity • Security • Self-Directed • Intelligence • Control Particular Wants What does she want to have. Mini-Challenges • You seem.. • etc. feelings and emotions to yourself. etc).. or point in a discussion.. allowing you time to gather information and link yourself to good thoughts. assume there is a part that will work WITH you. • You may . • If you are able to .
fun. Consider the wants and needs that a person may have . • Introduce topics that are fun. positive and interesting. Creating Them -. • Navigation Don't think of an exact plan.. interesting things • Keep thinking . think of general navigation • She Must Be Engaged In The Conversation! You need her to talk. interesting things. and interesting?" " Move the conversation in that direction. then ...Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Opportunities. • Confidence • Maturity • Security • Self-Directed • Intelligence • Control " • Excitement Challenges Challenge them to get what they want. General Conversational Management To steer the conversation in a good direction. • Topic Turning Point The process of moving from one topic to one of 6-8 relevant topics • In general.. • Can she see an opportunity to have "X". listen and be IN the conversation! • Conversational Dynamics Topics flow from one to the next. • Don't engage in conversations when it's NOT about positive. she may have to do Y to prove that. and see how doing Y would demonstrate it?> • Does she have what it takes to get X. fun.. bring up positive. or show what they have. interesting things... •• Show interest when someone discusses positive. by doing Y? • Does she want you to THINK she has X.. steer the conversation towards directions that engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way
.-and do Y to get it? • Can she do Y and make it happen? • Can she see that Y will get her what she wants? • Can she trust herself enough to do Y?
CONVERSATIONAL MANAGEMENT o
General . • Repeat."Where can I go that is fun. Are they ready to take advantage of that (this) opportunity? • Does she really want X and see how Y can get that? • Does she really have X. fun. Advanced Conversational Management To direct the conversation into even BETTER areas. positive..
• Where can I go that is fun. fascinating. and seductive things. • Keep thinking .Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner? Move the conversation in that direction.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
• • • o
Keep thinking . steer the conversation towards romantic. use as many of the language tools as you can. Get the conversation there. stay there for a while.
More Advanced Conversational Management To further direct the conversation into even BETTER areas."Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic. use the language tools as much as possible! • What If The Outcome Is Not What You Expected? • Move on!
TOPICS o Topics Of Enthusiasm and Passion Few things are more compelling in a person than for them to be passionate about something (hopefully many things) in life. seductive tilings? • The entire time: o If you hit a "dead end". and interesting? • Where can I go that will engage her emotions and imagination in a positive manner? • Where can I go that will get me closer towards romantic. positive. • When on good topics. use the language tools. back up a few steps. seductive things?" " Move the conversation in that direction. bring up images and thoughts that may work for you. Seduction Oriented Topics SOTs are topics that. o If you get to a good subject or topic. • Connections • Going for it • Making good decisions
. fascinating. and while there. fascinating. keep it there. • Repeat. and get the effect. by there very nature. Repeat. Conversational Fractionation • Using Conversational Fractionation • Start • Move • Back Up • Repeat • Dead Ends Come Back To Life! • Just back up and start over! Conversational Overview and Review • General Flow • Start on just about ANY subject.
• Get her to. The Complete Conversational Model See Appendix 2
PATTERNS o Pattern • • • • Formula While talking to a woman. o Talk about these things or listen to you talk about these things o get her to think about these things o get her to feel these things o get her to link them to you. get her to "experience" good feelings and states..
. clarifying.Use the conversational Management Techniques.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
• • • • • • • • o
Surrendering to feelings Getting excited Feeling excited Trusting your judgment Taking chances Indulgence Maturity Good decisions
Expanded Seduction Oriented Topics . Pattern Riffing In Real-Time • Use the Conversational Management techniques to get to good subjects • Look at the interesting topic that she and you are discussing o what is happening o what you know o what she is reacting to o and discuss things which are appropriate. Conversational Model With SOTXs. Those are STOXs. o Wanting to take action or seize an opportunity • Use the language tools. Amplify these feelings and states by talking. and • Look for: o Positive emotions and feeling o Positive sensations (as in physical ones) o Exciting feelings.
Canned Patterns ..Great as EXAMPLES • Learn and know some of them they may be useful. • Direct .SOTXs For each SOT. Link and associate these feelings to you.Look out for SOTXs • Direct 0 Move towards SOTs. Present a Call to action. there are easily 6-8 variations on that SOT that you can talk about. asking. • Manage .
o The Best Pattern Is This: • Get her to talk and think about positive. exciting.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
Use some "act now" languaging. • Use the language tools so that YOU become associated with those things
. and sensual things. interesting.
) o Easy Anchoring . That.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
APPENDIX II Speaking and Language Tools "Cheat Sheet"
• SPEAKING POINTERS o Voice Tone And Tonality o Pacing And Pausing o Energy And Enthusiasm LANGUAGE TOOLS AND DETAILS o Adjectives And Adverbs o Trance Words o Weasel Phrases o Embedded Commands o Linking o Easy-Linking (This.At the End • Burying Items o More And More o Compare And Contrast o Parts " Parts of a Subject • Parts of a Person o Opportunities And Challenges • Mini Challenges " Opportunities And Challenges o Ambiguities
.Point Or Touch On Positive And Negative LANGUAGE STRUCTURE AND TECHNIQUES o Pace And Lead • Topics and Subjects • Mindset of Frame • Current Reality o Give Them A Reason o Listing " General ... These. Those) MORE TOOLS o Pointing And Gestures o Linking Gestures (Towards And Away) o Easy Linking Expanded (Pointing With This. That.
The Complete Conversational Management Model
. Emotions and Imagination in a Positive Way
More Advanced Mgt. and Interesting
Advanced Mgt. Fascinating. Romantic. Positive.Dave Riker's Speed Seduction Language and Conversation Course
APPENDIX III The Complete Conversational Management Model
The Complete Conversational Management Model
General Mgt. Fun.
. Steer towards .Fun. Steer towards ..Dave Riker's Speed Seduction® Language and Conversation Course
The Complete Conversational Management Model (continued) Start a Conversation Manage the Conversation Move the Conversation in a Good Direction Steer towards .Engage the emotions and imagination in a positive way ... positive. interesting . fascinating. Fractionate If you take a wrong turn... Especially when at or near SOTXs and SOTs.. seductive things Direct the Conversation Pay attention when Good Subjects come up (SOTXs) Listen for anything a step or two away from an SOT Move towards SOTs Stay there as long as you can Use The Language Tools! As much as possible. back up! If you move back to a general topic.Romantic.