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Leyva Pg.

Eduardo Leyva

Ms.O'keefe & Ms.Robinson

English IV

4-3-19

People often face difficult times throughout their lives and when I see this I think “How

can I help” or “How can I make them feel better”. Everyone faces a difficult time at some point

in their lives and I feel like things can be done to help. One way I have found that can help

people feel better in difficult times is trying to engage in new techniques which can help you be

more compassionate and helpful towards others. While this can work others in order to help

others out you must first help yourself and change things in your life for the better. All of these

ways of helping people to deal with issues can work and still others believe that being a better

listener is all that people need. These different point of views disagree with each other in ways to

help people overcome challenges and what the best way to do so is. There are numerous ways

people think is the best way to help others.

Everyone has different way of solving problems or helping others out such as talking

with people, giving advice and just being an active listener. One way I found which can help you
be a better help to others is to practice techniques to make you a more compassionate person

which

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can make you be more helpful to people who have problems. In an article it was stated

that “engage in compassion meditation, an ancient Buddhist technique to increase caring feelings

for people who are suffering...that people trained in compassion were more likely to spend their

own money altruistically to help someone who was treated unfairly than those who were trained

in cognitive reappraisal” (​Brain Can Be Trained in Compassion...Association for Psychological

Science​). This quote shows that when people practiced things to be more compassionate they

ended up helping others more than usual. Another piece of information that I found shows that

people can actually teach themselves to be compassionate. In the article I found it stated that “if

you orient yourself to compassion, then you’re going to change the whole orientation of your

mind. And the key here is to understand that we can select, on purpose, one of our basic

motivational systems—for caring—and we can cultivate it, help it grow and mature, through

practice “ (​How to Turn Your Brain from Anger to Compassion...Greater Good)​ . This shows that

people who want to be more compassionate towards others can easily learn to do so and help

them in a positive way. The articles also states that “Compassion is going out and confronting

your anxieties.” which means that in order to be compassionate you have to face your own

troubles and see ways to fix it. This reveals that practicing ways to be more compassionate and

better towards other people can work and can even be life changing to a person's way of

thinking.
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Another way in which I found that could help people is to judge what we are doing

wrong as individuals. In the article it is stated that “in order to help others you must “Start with

yourself”(​Squillaci, Laurie​). This is saying that in order to be able to help others you must first

see what you can do better yourself. Another article that ties into this also says that in order to

help other people you must “Start with yourself”. This article also says if you want to help others

you can also start with yourself and see how you can improve. The article says to “ Practice

radical self-care” and also “Heal your own trauma”(​Rankin, Lissa)​ which means that you should

look for ways to help yourself before helping others because you can give people bad

advice.This reveals that in order to help someone who you want to help you must first see what

you can improve on in your life to give that best advice possible. This reveals that there are many

ways people can go about to help people going thru difficult times.

The third way that I found people were able to help others is by being an actively listener.

Being an actively listener is important because it shows interest in a person and it shows that you

really care about what they have to say. In the article it states that ”Think before responding.”

and “Know when it’s wise to interrupt.” are important because these things show people that you

are interested in the conversation and also pay good attention to it because the person on the

other end might think you don’t care about what they are saying. The article also says to “
Recognize changes in tone and ​body language​”(​How to Become a Better Listener.” Psychology

Today, Sussex Publishers,)

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because it can say alot about how they feel or what they are thinking. This shows that another

key way to help people is to pay close attention to what they have to say and that sometimes it

may be better to not say anything at all.

People have different ways of helping others overcome difficult challenges. This idea

believes that its better to let people talk to you about their problems and just listen to what they

have to say because this can make a big difference. One way I found that people help others is by

doing basic things such as listening and paying attention. In an article it is stated that

”Sometimes some basic help can make a big difference”. This is saying that getting hep from

someone can make a difference. The article also said that “People who often focus on the

positives in their lives are less upset by difficult memories”(​Deal Better with Hard Times.

Mental Health America​). This could be a good way to help people feel better in difficult times.

This is saying that other than talking to a person about their problem just listening can make a

big difference in their lives. Showing people positive things or just being positive around them

can also help tremendously. This shows that there are small ways which you can help people

overcome difficult challenges without immediately trying to give advice.


Another way I found that can also be helpful towards people is sometimes just to leave

people alone and let them overcome their challenges. One article I found states that sometimes it

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is better to try to let people resolve their problems if you see that what you are doing is not

helping. This article shows that depression is a difficult problem to tackle and often people

suffering from it cannot just “snap out of it” by sheer force of will. This article also says that

although there are many ways you can help recovery “ is in the hands of the depressed person.”

This shows that sometimes although you try to help as much as possible it is up to the person to

get better or try to get better and to think more positively about their future. This article then

goes on to say that “being a compassionate listener is much more important than giving

advice.”(​Helping Someone with Depression.”​) which shows that sometimes it is better to be an

active listener than trying to give solutions. This reveals that although your intentions may be

good and you are doing what's best for the person it is up to that same person to try to change for

the better.People can’t be helped unless they want to be helped.

The last way that I found which shows that sometimes it is better to leave people alone is

the fact that not everything you say applies to another persons and the information you give out

can actually cause more damage. Going back to a article I found before it states that you have to
“Practice radical self-care...Heal your own trauma...If you hold on to unhealed trauma, you'll

likely traumatize others unintentionally”(​Rankin, Lissa)​ , which means

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that you should look for ways to help yourself before helping others because you can give people

bad advice. This adds to the idea that sometimes it is better not to try to give people advice

because you may no give the best advice and it is better to just listen to others problems.

In conclusion the articles I found mostly had different ways of going about helping

people overcome difficulties some ways required more personal involvement and change while

others just required very minimal things such as “being an active listener”. In my opinion the

way you go about helping someone depends on the person you are trying to help. For example If

you don’t know nothing about a person but you see they are looking very sad and you try to help

I think the best way to help them is to listen to what is wrong rather than trying to give them

advice because you don’t know everything about that person. On the contrary if you have a

friend who you know all about and see that they are going thru a difficult time you can step in

and try to give advice because you know more specific things that may have caused this

individual to be faced with a challenge.


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Works Cited

Brain Can Be Trained in Compassion, Study Shows.” Association for Psychological

​ ww.psychologicalscience.org/news/releases/compassion-training.html​.​ (Pg.2)
Science, w

How to Turn Your Brain from Anger to Compassion.” Greater Good,

greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_to_turn_brain_anger_compassion(Pg.2)

Squillaci, Laurie. “Blog.” Image, 2012,

www.cc-sd.edu/blog/10-ways-of-showing-compassion. (​ Pg.3)

Rankin, Lissa. “10 Easy Ways To Cultivate Compassion.” Mindbodygreen,

Mindbodygreen, 26 Jan. 2016, (Pg.3,5)

How to Become a Better Listener.” Psychology Today, Sussex Publishers,

www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/how-do-life/201405/how-become-better-listener. ​(Pg3-4)
Deal Better with Hard Times. Mental Health America, 4 Feb. 2014,

www.mentalhealthamerica.net/deal-better-hard-times​. (Pg.4)

Helping Someone with Depression.” Healthy Eating Tips to Prevent, Control, and Reverse

Diabetes, 7 Jan. 2019,

www.helpguide.org/articles/depression/helping-someone-with-depression.htm/.​ (Pg.5)