You are on page 1of 4

THE XYZ CHRONICLES

Volume I

The Royal Society of Chroniclers

Most Honorable and Esteemed Chroniclers:

I come before this great assembly to report to you such events as no one has
never seen. As a foreign diplomat to your assemblage, bestowed with the
honors of your membership granted to me as the highest honor, I offer my
deepest gratitude. Only nine others have that privilege in your great
country. Though I live on shores far away from your country, I will provide
you the reward of your investment in my work.

I tremble even to think about the events that took place as I slipped into
another dimension and entered a universe passing through ours1. Although
it is not our practice to divulge the intricacies of our chronicling, I consulted
with our wise and most honored Master Chronicler, Dr. Winston, who said I
must tell the whole world. Our bylaws do not prohibit us to report on such
things, so I shall break tradition at the urging of Dr. Winston. All civilization
must know of the things I experienced and how it may affect our whole
universe, for these are indeed sobering realities we have not yet seen in this
world.

THAT STRANGE PLANET
On a cold day, when the stratus clouds wisp across the Colorado sky and tiny
crystalline snow mysteriously appears and floats past your face in the
brilliant sun, I stepped through a gated door to take another look inside Ida
Wanna’s old abandoned house, which I can no longer describe nor find! I set
foot on a planet just like ours in every respect, yet it was mysterious in that
you felt relief, like a satisfied burp of some burnt blue mist going out to
consume cities of the same names and locations as ours.
1
http://www.universetoday.com/2008/02/04/large-hadron-collider-may-help-us-
glimpse-into-another-dimension/
High energy collisions by the nearly-completed Large Hadron Collider (LHC) may be able
to generate particles that are sensitive to dimensions beyond our four dimensional space-time. These
exotic particles, called Kaluza-Klein gravitons, would be highly sensitive to the geometry of extra-
dimensions, giving scientists an idea about what lies beyond our universe. If these particles are
detected, and if their characteristics can be measured, then perhaps the extra dimensions predicted
by string theory may be proven to exist…
But, yes, yes, one thing was missing. War. Yet the world was still full of
error and sin. And, this other-dimensional planet had world peace, but only
in the sense of the burnt blue mist. Can you believe it – yes, world peace, as
I could never have imagined! The world was pristine with the burnt blue mist
hanging over the cities. I observed no slums, no extortion, no political
intrigues( nor parties nor despotic rulers), and the list goes on and on!

But, yes, yes, one thing was mischievously present. I could smell it in the
vanilla-fresh, air and I could feel it at all times. The pressing feeling, pushing
freely at my brain felt like the time, the time, … the time when at the age of
15, my curiosity was saturated with one subject alone. I asked my
grandmother for some homemade “stuff,” which I knew not why she called
“squeez'ns” at that time in my life. I asked her to give me some of that
distilled mash out of her hidden mountain still that produced what she
considered a remedy for all sorts of ailments. I was ailing more after asking
her for the treatment! All I asked for was a gallon. Go figure. Besides, I had
an excuse to use it for an explosive experiment with my chemistry set down
in the secret places of our basement, and that is another tale.

The state of affairs on this strange planet, which I've told you fine members
about, came with a struggle, and I shall recount such events as given to me
by a little girl of that other dimension. I cannot divulge her location. She
may have slipped into this time and space to be your neighbor. If I gave her
home GPS coordinates, she would make me swallow my pride, dig my music,
and shiver me timbers. Honorable Chroniclers, this world of other
dimensions had no name, with it's the burnt blue mist and its air whisping
with an aroma of vanilla. Though I do not know how to access the privilege
of again entering that world passing through ours, you will experience it in
my Recounts.

MY NEW FRIEND, XYZ
XYZ is the subject of my whole story. It is through her that I met the people
of her world and met their amazing leader, Lamlios, the one who brought
peace in a most unusual way, though the cost was astronomical in order to
defeat the Moon Mobster who ruled the dark side. No longer is there a dark
side. But there is a burnt blue mist, which, by the way, “shivers me
timbers,” as I mentioned earlier. Now, I will skippity skip on to my
adventures and call them RECOUNTS.
Oh, oh (cough), uh, uuuh---uhhh---h’mmm, I apologize for my reversion to
such an uncultured word as “skippity skip” in my last statement, and maybe
even “shiver me timbers” earlier, my Honorable Colleagues. I am still
inexorably affected, afflicted, depicted, and re-plicted, ---uhh, ouch, there I
go again. Yes, mmmm, yes, the old and ever-present blue burnt mist affects
me deep within the cliffs of my undulated brain. Yes, mmmm, yes, it is that
mist of the other-dimensioned world, of which I will begin with in my
Recounts. I can only guarantee one thing. My whole personality will change
as I speak. The residual blue burnt mist will work its magic in the centrifuge
of my brain as it concentrates that little girl's adventures, drawing all that is
solid to a common center and making fluid the end.

XYZ begins my friends!!!

Recount 1
Xyz AND THE BLUE BURNT MIST

“Mr. Suniferon!” shouted XYZ as she slipped past the scented lilacs of blue to
reach a thin, yet jocular, old man in his 80's working on his flower
propagation experiments. He had no hair, but he had brains. He had no
teeth, but he could grip your mind like a bulldog. He owned no cane for his
arthritic joints, but with the blue burnt mist he could walk briskly and run like
the winter Schnook that shoots down from the north and hits my old
Colorado home and reaches it's grip far south.

“I saw it with my own eyes! I saw the giant green preying mantis that has
become our friend! The one that can smell cheese and tell us so!”
exclaimed XYZ with a flow of words that tickled my mind.

The blue burnt mist carried me beside her wherever she went. That's how I
can tell you these Recounts. I have to admit that her words could also tickle
the innermost state of curiosity in any person, since XYZ always spoke the
truth, even though mischievous adventures surrounded her very nature.

To be continued
The tale of the burnt blue mist of intrigue and peace, known and distributed
by one Man, Mr. Lamlion shall come into view.