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Ecstasy Reflections

Mai El-Moraly

Rasha Adel

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Ecstasy Reflection Poetry Collection Mai El-Moraly Rasha Adel First Edition November 2008 Creator Publications Under the license of; Oktob Publicity, Inc. Elma‟ahad El-Diny St, El-Marg, Cairo, Egypt Telephone: 02 24405047 Cell Phone: 012 9251592 018 2363035 General Manager: Yahia Hashem Cover Designer: Ahmed El-Moraly Editor: Jailan El-Deeb ISBN: 978-977-6297-53-1 Dar Oktob: 21048/2008 Copyrights © All rights reserved, according to the contract. No part of this book may be reproduced, in any form or by any means, without a written permission from the publisher. This edition may be sold inside and outside Egypt. This edition is printed in ARE.

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Dedicated to all our beloved ones … 4 .

yet profound experience of life. investigate and portray a clearer.AUTHORS’ NOTE Our collection of poetry is intended to explore. rather revealing more of ourselves as new born writers and as individuals. It depicts different vital aspects of human nature. faith to betrayal. without necessarily being personal. determined to create their own voices. varying from love to hatred. In writing it. Mai El-Moraly & Rasha Adel 5 . yet not a full picture of the human psyche. we have tried to share our limited. hope to loss and life to death.

CONTENTS PART ONE  The Lady in Blue  The Story of “HE”  Days …  A Silent Call  Night of the Fall  You and Yourself  Good Mourning  Together Forever  A Sonnet to the End  An Outrageous Call! “On the 6th of April Strike”  I am 21…  A Day in the Life of an “Eye” 10 12 15 16 17 19 25 27 28 29 32 33 6 .

 An Apology  An Epitaph  Now I am 29!  I Lost my Ring  WHY???  Smoother-Land  My Old Man 35 36 37 38 40 41 42 7 .

PART TWO               She who Said Farewell to Grief Little or Nothing at All As Fickle As the Weather On Pause A solemn Moment Insignificant Against All Ah Love! She Entombed THEY Hey You! Dust A wasted Dream A Beauty Queen 45 48 50 51 52 54 56 58 59 61 62 63 65 66 8 .

      Looking Glasses Tick Tock Me and Thee People Come and People Go Misjudged When Honesty Prevails … 67 69 70 71 73 74 9 .

PART ONE Mai El-Moraly 10 .

The moment she entered the room. When you see her in motion. Like a full moon so bright. Like Athena she is wise. In a princess gown so blue.The Lady in Blue Like a soft feather she flew. Her lips as red as blood. Her words can be deceitful. Like a Greek goddess full of grace. She perfectly meets the perfection. A beautiful mind. In a woman! What a dangerous duality! Like Aphrodite she is beautiful. She possesses every fine quality. She sweeps you like a flood. A pure virgin for eternity. and a beautiful face. Who never commits a sin! 11 . She captured all attention. With a magical halo of light. Beware the look of her eyes. Of a beautiful bride but with no groom! Her eyes as blue as the ocean. No one can touch her skin. She's no man‟s property.

And independence too. Freedom is her main theme. But she left before I can tell. a daydream. With pain that is so extreme ! 12 . Within a blink she disappeared. That left my heart aching. Like a fantasy . I couldn‟t make a decision! Her angelic beauty captured my heart. Not a chance to bid farewell! She was simply breathtaking. That will never come true.She is everyman‟s dream. As if she was a mere vision. And hence many doubts appeared. Here comes the end before the start.

Prevented him from believing. Innocence . Silence ... He was gaining.. Was forsaken. He was seeking... Was mistaken... Fakes . Happiness ... He was faking. No more speaking.... He was aching. Sadness . Please awaken! 13 . Life is so deceiving. Conscience ....The Story Of “HE” --The Case – Emptiness .. He felt while he was leaving. Rightness . Arrogance .. Pretence ..... Madness ..

Evil . Exceeded. 14 .. Pain ...... He pleaded. Succeeded.... Treachery .. He needed.. Preceded.The Trial – Tragedy ..-. Verdict .. Help . Has seeded. Guilty . Proceeded..

. "Still I don‟t know.. No breathing. Finality … What a scene! Death … Opened the gate..--The End – Suffocation . Irony Of fate... Dear ones farewell „Cause now I shall go".. He‟s dreaming! Reality . Complexion … Went pale. Was mean. Awareness .. 15 . Soul … Departed. A life For sale!!! To heaven or hell. The auction Started.. Salvation . He‟s screaming.. Forgiveness . Redeeming..

In my orchard watching the universe. Nothing but Fragrance remains everywhere. Forgot my morning wishes.Days … Like Petals of an immaculate flower. And I. Bowing to Mother Nature. 16 . Forgot my night prayers. And the day turned and departed in silence. Then leaving on the wings of minuets Racing with seconds. vanishing into thin air. Bashfully.

in pleasure Sipping the wine out of your royal veins. you know To leave this world behind is death. Dare not to part my love. Nor knowledge to fight this beast called “cancer”. And if from this world you go. Or if delusions. your soul haunted. Except to die at your fences. 17 . And what kind of Evil might be it? Consuming you this tyrant. And won‟t be able to celebrate. To change a celestial order. O scholars‟ minds do search for answer. For more than Man needful is. My poor mind has not the wit. when you are gone. fearlessly facing intolerable pains.A silent call O love don‟t die for I shall hate All men. The whole world ends with your breath. Decaying a refined soul beyond measure. Nor long bear such painful disorder. When I remember that you were one. Then all delights remain unwanted. And yet you can‟t be occupied by this. And the mind lost its senses.

all gone One after one. It scattered them too and left no one. Am I guilty because I trust? Now what inside shall remains inside. Tell me whether I am wrong or right? Night! Night of the fall! Who's the naïve stupid fool? All deceived me. all lied. Answer me and ease my mind Tell me whether I am wrong or right? 18 . Answer me and ease my mind. I thought they won't change forever. your cold wind makes us shiver. They should have listened! They should have tried! Answer me dark cruel night. As your wind scatters the leaves.Night of the fall Night! Night of the fall! Who's the loneliest one of all? All left me. Oh night. No one left to confide. They should have stayed! They should have tried! Answer me dark cruel night.

In my soul… You should have mercy! You should have heart! Answer me dark cruel night.. Please I am running out of fuel.Night! Night of the fall! Why don‟t you answer my call! Night! Night of the fall! Heel this empty broken soul! Night! Night of the fall! Help me. Answer me and ease my mind Tell me whether I am wrong or right? 19 . With your wind moving west Ask your leaves to fill this hole In my heart.. Cause I will quit the duel Get this burden off my chest. I‟m losing control! Tell my enemies now to rest.

The land of no one. But You! Your apathy. Yourself-seeking.You and Yourself Your egocentricity is overbearing. your inhumanity. Your everything will end! Now … No hasty conclusion. 20 . Yourself-centred world. And let the play begins: “You & Yourself” is the title. But don‟t judge until it ends. Detach Yourself from You! You are living in the land of nowhere. your vanity.

no core! A duel takes place between them both. You & Yourself. She cries in vain. A fake dream. And cursed being.Scene I Curtains up. A Dark Place Enter the main characters: A Princess. For each one has his own needs. A maimed soul. 21 . And the princess is torn between them both. her heart bleeds. A silent call. Both have no essence. Both interest her no more.

Another soil to bury your shame. Go seek another sky to breathe. 22 . My world is out of air. For I no longer care! Exeunt. To reach the top. For once try to be fair.Scene II (The Princess cries alone) Don‟t step on me.

Scene III “You & Yourself” (The confrontation) You cherished Yourself. You loathed Yourself You ruined Yourself You killed Yourself And no one is left to judge You! For no one is watching … But Yourself! 23 .

Scene IV (Enter the Princess) Alas! Seek no salvation in my arms I won‟t welcome You Seek no forgiveness in my heaven I won‟t welcome You Not even damnation in my hell I won‟t welcome You! You mortified Yourself! And Yourself abetted You! 24 .

You lost Yourself . This deed provoked the course of the universe. Exeunt. and rain.Scene V (The Princess leaves and You remains alone) The blackened sky is infuriated. With thunder. This act is really well done! And for the broken hearted princess. Curtains fall. And no one is left to blame. That You wish will pour and pour To wash your guilt and shame. And made the heavens frown. This is the end of the game. lightning. The End 25 . You lost your love. Applause for You and for Yourself. But what has gone is gone. Now let the curtains down. You lost all your beloved ones.

Good mourning you my dear companion. and died. waited And on seeing you. and clutched. The pulses stopped and it‟s time to leave. the heat cracked the leaf. they sang and celebrated. With smothered tears and deep woe. Carried on the wings of angels you flied. Phantoms of thought and memory fled. Nothing to console you but a flower bud. Fragments muddled up with golden tears. where you will reside. slaughtered. The roaring winds rushed inward and you sighed. swift from your lulled head.Good Mourning Good mourning you my dear companion. Like fading fumes. To the heaven of heavens. watered. The sun waved goodbye. And before its time for your sake. 26 . Wretched and stretched under dirt and mud. And got finally relieved from worries and fears. Searched for a friendly hand. With merry hymns on the gate fairies.

cold and blue. From the other world I‟ll be watching you Good mourning you my dear companion. but now goodbye. 27 . but now farewell Fated to have another place to Dwell.Good mourning you my dear companion. Though parting makes it all hollow. on you I‟ll keep an eye. Even when it gets really dark. We once had each other. Pale ghastly faces. No matter how far. Just try to guide me with a spark. Good mourning you my dear companion. Surrounded by creatures you‟ve never known. We once had each other. But deep inside you know it‟s true. For this course of nature we have to follow.

. the more I know you better. The more I sink into you. No I never! I know you well. Still I want to venture.Together Forever You said we will be together forever. Sometimes we find in torturing ourselves a pleasure! 28 .. I never believed you …. you‟re like a deep river. however! I wish my feelings will someday differ.. BUT IT’S TRUE.

Blowing to disturb tranquillity of deaf ears. Dried all the waters of seas and oceans. The universe crashes down in an indistinguishable disorder. a powerfully blown horn shatters Earth into pieces. And in a deep hole gathered all species. Then.A Sonnet to the End Drums beating so loud and fierce. As differences between Man and animal are seen no more. Fooled senses that were formerly right. Uncovering piles of bones and flesh so rotten. While Suns vigorously burning the green fields of the mind. And nothing remains as it was before. And suddenly stopped all the motions. And dusty faces searching though stricken. Summoning souls that were long forgotten. Moons with flashes of blinding light. And celestial bodies go utterly out of order. That once blossomed with philosophy so refined. With dismay as drums howl and movements quicken. 29 .

and those who won‟t. For those who doubt. and those who grant. and those who forget. An outrageous call! For those who believe. and those who can‟t. For those who give up. For those who reject. For those who sell. and those who buy. An outrageous call! For those who fight. and those who submit. For those who reap. and those who deny. and those who don‟t.An Outrageous Call! On “The 6th of April Strike” An outrageous call! For those who care. For those who surrender. and those who try. An outrageous call! For those who can. For those who laugh. For those who dare. For those who remember. An outrageous call! For those who kill. and those who accept. 30 . and those who plant. and those who defy. and those who die. and those who cry. and those who don‟t. For those who will.

and those who enjoy. and those who erupt. and those who live. For those who suffer. and those who write. For those who object. An outrageous call! For those who take. 31 . For those who guide. An outrageous call! For those who leave. and those who forgive. and those who are right. and those who bite. For those who hold back. For those who read. and those who obey.An outrageous call! For those who build. For those who please. An outrageous call! For those who are wrong. and those who destroy. and those who stay. and those who annoy. and those who stray. An outrageous call! For those who develop. and those who give. and those who corrupt. For those who die. and those who interrupt. For those who resent. For those who continue. For those who suck.

To set our souls free! To set our souls free! 32 . and those who agree. An outrageous call! For all human beings. and those who can see. For those who plot. For those who are blind. and those who decree.An outrageous call! For those who disagree.

The answer is... So run! But where to? . I‟m 21.. Anyway what has gone is gone.. Can no longer see the sun... Who survived life? Think about it son. and pain no fun.. Nothing left to be done! Lots of sufferings. None…None! 33 . The curtains are falling though Life has just begun. None….I’m 21 .

his small black metal thing Beside the bed sends flashes of light! She holds it. Within a blink.. “S-w-e-e-t H-e-a-r-t” With a small picture beside Of a real beauty!!! He grasps this thing from her hands violently! His face changes. as usual I can see love in the air He is touching her face tenderly She is holding his hand softly Then. he seems nervous Her face changes.. her lips are trembling. she seems shocked An overflow of mixed emotions follows She sits on the chair gazing at the window. she looks so pale! He rests his head on her knees. he looks so hopeless! Words of forgiveness rushed to her lips ….. 34 . she is giving it to him But something attracts her attention!!! The letters on the screen.. his lips are trembling.A Day in the Life of an “Eye “ Curtains up… A new bright day He‟s here beside her.and died there Then silence reigned ….

35 .The" bright day" turned into a "misty night" My vision isn‟t clear … not anymore! It is raining now! A flood of tears blocked my view Night is falling faster and faster Now I can see only Sadness Darkness Nothingness Curtain falls.

My Sincere Candle. Sometimes I tangle. 36 . And Light my darkness. I can be mad or evil.An Apology I'm a human being. I‟m not an angel! I have a heart that loves and beats. But out of anger So please forgive me.

But sadly forgetting. Too genuine. And capable of forgiving. Too valiant. And too full of the sap of living. Too genial.An Epitaph Too vigorous Too young. I WAS! 37 . Too realistic. Too artistic. Too strong. Too mystic.

Have faith. “Life”. and believe. And all what I have dreamt of. Shall I resign?!! The answer is not to whine.! 38 . But waiting for the right sign. Can you define? A huge empty place. Rebel against confine! Say farewell to grief..Now I’m 29! I‟m Twenty Nine.. Decline…! Decline…! Decline…. It‟s Nature‟s Design! I‟m accepting … and doing just fine. Not to be deceived by life! What a word ….. I know the sun will always shine. Someday will be mine. where you have to wait in line! Driven by a hidden power that is so divine.. trust.

I thought it‟s a bless. I guess I need to be free. It Never belonged to my hand. 39 . This golden circle. This stillness of emotions. Maturity … maybe. It‟s not mine … I‟m not mine! “Me” I‟m just a fake identity. My empty soul . Wounded entity . my spring. May be its insanity. Surrounding my finger. Suffocating my blood This thick mud. No I am sure it‟s a damn curse. But this is my nature. Have I given it up? Negativity… maybe. This deserted land.I Lost My Ring I lost my ring … Maintained my humanity. Perhaps searching for Purity.

Instead of this artificial light. left and right. That causes me distress! To lose to win I care no more . I find it bright. Find the real brightness. I panicked … I searched …I tried! But it‟s gone! It disappeared! I‟m breathing now… isn‟t it weird? I can have another one . A better one. I‟ll start again . But mine …. . I can. Faded into the dark night.. faces and hands.I examine those around me. I think! I lost my ring but not everything!!! 40 . One day I„ll find what I‟m looking for. With a shiny Diamond.

WHY???
This monosyllabic word has been going through my mind all day long, Echoing loudly in my head ….still don‟t know “Why” I‟ve been investigating everything around me, Every feeling, everyone! I was even investigating the tone of the word… “Why” The voice in the end of the word is like a cry, But for what?! Is it a deep cry for help, for knowledge? A cry to be heard, or to be noticed!!! “Why “…..it sounded like a sigh, As when you fail to reach something high, When you seek the ocean but find it dry, Or when dear people suddenly die, In every time we say good-bye, When things get complicated when there is no reply, When you are forced to face things you cannot deny, When you lose it all within a blink of an eye, And you are no more able to give it a try, When you need help but there is no one ready to sacrifice, We are always asking “Why “ But still don‟t know “Why “??

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Smother-Land
Hail king of Smother-Land, We are all at your command. My grandpa told me about your deeds, My father did as well! Now it‟s my turn to tell my kids, For their turn will come to tell! The same old story, Of a king with a will of fire, With power, authority and wealth, Who does whatever he desires, The same old story, Over and over told and sung, The victory, the glory, That no one can deny, No matter old or young, A happy nation, Firm foundation, Great expectation, Green plantation, No obligation, Free medication, Perfect education, Self motivation, Promising generation, Policy revelation, Fair regulation, Civilized conversation, Ohh … have I strayed again?! Forgive my imagination!!! Hail king of Smother-Land, We are all at your command.

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My Old Man
My old man wrote, Words of wisdom to me, On a dead leaf of a lemon tree, He said believe me little girl, Behind your mask I can see, Because I know you deeply, So dry your tears away, And listen carefully. Sometimes letting go, Can make you stronger, Can set your soul free, And in this life we are fated, So what shall be! One day will be! But face your fate with dignity, With a head highly raised, With a heart full of serenity, Ease your worries … One day the wound will heal, All your sorrows and sadness, You don‟t have to conceal, Burst into tears! Shout to their ears! Let the world know, Your existence is real, Show them how you feel! Show them how you feel!

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Before your eyes blink You will have the reply. Relive your life. trust in you. Trust in HIM. You believe to be true. Ask God to help you On HIM you should rely. Make everything possible. Make everything new. Above highly high. Trust in everything. Life is a deal! Take it or leave it. Wave to your past. Live it or die. So. We know life is tough. How merciful you are God! No one can deny. Reject or suspect. But look at the sky.Rebel or object. Goodbye! Farewell! Adieu! 44 . But never quit trying to Give it a try.

PART TWO Rasha Adel ___________________________________ 45 .

Now seemed to be. A subject of self-reproach. So gloomy. Plodding along. She long remained lost. And so horror stricken. They are her burdens. She always thought. She has a heart. Ironically. They are her temptations. With a satisfaction so radiant. With eyes bent down. Rapt in thoughts.She who Said Farewell to Grief She. She has a mind. These impressions would fade away. She drags them along. 46 . Who always looked back upon her actions. She helplessly yields to them both. With the lapse of time.

Through her fatal mistakes. A weak creature. She could see nothing. Upon the dreadful brink. She recoiled. Our coming destination. And sadly indulges us. Of things beyond. 47 . She would have died. But with horror. And unfortunately. Led to her condemnation. That separates us. That pathetically shapes. From the mystery.Standing shivering. Broken the wall. To sip at her own chosen drink. Within a blink. That fails to get bold. Into deep isolation. She was looking beyond this world. Had in some art. The terrible consequences. How she was not ignorant enough. But herself.

'Be careful of the way. It is a fall. And rest us for so many years. Come along. Guided her to North. Death is definite. Get into real life. An ex-sinner.Yet of a sudden. The weight of humanity. And say farewell to grief. With hope. Turn the page. pray. Words of wisdom. At the heart of grace' Indeed. That she is redeemed. In which you think of all the decayed. Relief! Repent. Of your well beloved dead. But a fall upon the knees Which may end in prayer. The living glory. believe. Showed her the light. Upon which. 48 . She. And you shall see. Finally feels. And an everlasting. Most heavily falls.

In a world where a soldier in a tattered battledress. On others who have got no sense at all. Lady that I am: Pretty as a picture. I am the cream of all your kind. But a mother's choice may sometimes fall. Whatever she thinks. My vigour and free spirit. From old novels of courtly romance To ballads of Springs and Falls. Lady of the living. And although she may boast she knows. 49 . lady of the dead. Shape the woman who now I am. She knows little or really nothing at all. Is as honourable as a college man. And chat about symbols and myths. As only when she trusts in her maternal wit. fine as gold.Little or Nothing at All Cast your worn eyes upon me. How to distinguish verse from prose. should fit. Unwinds the scheme of my real fame. And the thread of my poor garment. Does she argue by intuition. Behold the elegant figure. Though she has learned this and more. I simply hold sway over all. for her most beloved.

That even the cleverest woman of all. That she despises those of worth. Knows little or nothing at all. now go and join the sore losers. And Oh! Poor she.Now observe her taste. Who dwell in her cage. And she. Like animals who rant and rage. and how sad. who is in awe. Whereas I have got myself and for no change. Isn't it bad? Yes. Whom only wealth supports? Yet I am not insulted by her notions. And favours mud to solid force. 50 . I won. How could she know what inner beauty is. who fails to know.

As Fickle As the Weather As the winds must shift and veer. Step by step. Though centuries pass swiftly by. Naked. through winter. Of being as fickle as the weather?! 51 . As Mother Nature must change attire. we deck in leaves. Never do we change. through summertime. As we live on and live forever. As on our sturdy bodies. When we stay at a million years of age. May no leaves ever wither. Though night succeeds each day. measure for measure. Before. we stand as trees. Hey! Can't you feel the pleasure. It's only our dances that change in time.

On Pause Love is such a cruel tyrant. That has creation in its keeping. In which he's never seen himself before. Of love and passion beyond all extremes. Sorrowfully in her heart. Of walking away and humming their dreams. And her beauty is shattered by his flaw. All the sorry quarrels buried in his soul. That would put their hopes together on pause. No longer trembles at applause. And make Time so vicious in his reaping. Still waiting for his call. As when her blood suspends in doubt And each full impulse backward rolls. Or holds mercy on all his weeping. And he who delves in her beauty's lore. Oh my. That heedless of all the faith he keeps. Grieves over what he's done before. Pitiful so it is to drag out. he is a companion. Who puts an end to all her sleeps. 52 . The moment all their love stops breeding. Does he behold her weak figure. how year on year is gone. For whatever inexorable cause.

To where I walked clumsily. Hinting at some other order. Of some inner emotions. 53 . Bound by the tremendous power.A Solemn Moment A wake of light seemed to lie on the grass behind us. You rolled yourself over in the long green grass. As time approaches. As the trees wave. We have sat together. Our soliloquies were finally to be shared. You chewed a stalk between your teeth. We sat with our arms binding our knees. As the clouds pass. You made me laugh. To where the great elm trees stand. On this ring of grass. Which makes a reason everlasting. And … On this ring of grass.

With admiration. 54 . Rather. Forbiddingly. By a loose but a fundamental tie. And thought with a sigh. So that your eyes sparkle. If I don't purse my lips. I looked at you vaguely . If I don't screw my handkerchief. I shall cry. And sticking it behind her ear. How we were bound together. At her and not me.Until … I saw her picking some flowers.

Between mysticism and madness. Out of me now.Insignificant My roots go down to the depths of the world. And I am being knocked against. And I am torn. 55 . my mind can pour Blank melodies of human experience. The world is entire. And I am twisted. And I wind up on the edge of the margin. And when future can only blossom out of the past. Words move darkly in the depths of my mind. I can only struggle to arrest a moment in time. I begin to draw a figure and the world is gathered in it. And I yield to madness. And I am outside. And I am being damaged. I hear nothing but the murmur of the waves in the air.

And I was bleeding.And I was weeping. And I sink. I am a hollow phantom moving mistily without a background. Waters sweep me. Waters heap themselves over me. And I fall. And I am stretched among endless paths with people pursuing. I have no personal experience I am shattered. 56 . I am insignificant. Through darkness I sail on alone. And I am tumbled. For someone to save me from being blown forever outside the loop of time. And When I try to pull myself." And I am turned. I have no face. And I was searching. "I am a collective identity without a single self. And When I try to shout.

Against all the deaths. Long has been confused. Against all the lives. Against all the evaluations. Against all the goods. Against all the truths. 57 .Against All … Against all the beginnings. A muse. Against all the madness. Against all the repents. Against all the heavens. Against all the odds. Against all the forbidden. And. Against all the false. Against all the hells. Against all the logics. And. Against all the hidden. Against all the sins. Against all the angels. Remains a muse. To its author who. Against all the humiliations. Against all the devils. Against all the endings.

Will always be my muse. Till after the last syllable. 58 .And so. Embodied in you. Will prevail. Whose memory. Of my recorded youth.

which have long been falling apart. And bring it on for the sake of ultimate satisfaction. By our souls. Ah. difficult to be found. 59 . The force that makes the whole world goes around. let us be true. love. Until we are no longer in confine. Let's stick together and be wild. And corruption is taking all control. In an inspiring way. faith is fading down our souls. Until we are finally able to resign. Indeed. Yet it's never too late. Urging me to search for the core of your perfection. Let's stick together and face the tide.Ah Love! You have a magnificent power that changes the hearts. We can still change our fate. Your image haunts me so many years ago.

That made humanity bleeding. Unable to draw herself back. How I wish I could rather help you stand. Like a lonely feather drifting aimlessly. Like a desperate mother in agony. To face all your miseries. Don‟t you know that the great work of the world. the gateway that would set me free. From all the evil inherited by me. How I wish I could rather offer you my hand. But. She is my outlet. I could see her whirl down caverns.She Entombed Her eyes make me see the devil in me. To set free all the banned. I could hear her cry mercilessly. In her is the end of breeding. Is planted in your lands? 60 . In her is the end of corruption. And. In her is the end of weeping. Calling death to summon her fast.

By all the beauty I can see. From accomplishing all what I was meant to be. 61 . Shall dim your eyes that now are faded! No more with sickening loneliness. Shall ache your heart that now is dreaded. No more with overflowing darkness. And so. I wish I am not forsaken. By all the evil that exists within me. And make your life remain longer shaded. In your eyes that mercilessly hinder me.But. I wish I am not over taken. And. No more of me shall quiver down your days. Yet. I am resigning integrity to my creator. I am resigning loyalty to my maker.

They fumble at your door. They never took your breath away. Starts nearer and then so slow. And scalp its shape as a piece of clay. For you were definitely smart enough.THEY They fumble at your door. They can make your pretty eyes. As some sort of a drunken Bee. They stun you by degrees. Unable to stand tall. Before a tremendous blow. They stun you by degrees. They never took your breath away. Beware of their tricks. To drag their naked souls along. 62 . Prepare the iron maiden in you. Fall into tears. Prepare the iron maiden in you.

when we are long driven and led.Hey You! Your confession is not very much too late. Yet. I am not a kid. "Did I fool you around?" … Oh God again I did! Indeed. By our restless souls which are long twisted and full of hate? 63 . it's a seasonal date!" I tell you. but pardon me. you made me believe that there is a certain fate. You dragged yourself to confess what you have already said. you sounded very much like trying to wake up the dead. I warned you before not to mess around. life is a chaos and too many years are still coming ahead So how are we ever going to face them. I knew you were sincere when you once said "I like you. Behind your lowered voice now and bowed head.

Down in the dust. I will stamp the ground.Dust I will stamp all this dust. Hard as a rock. I distrust 64 . Underground! Love has crushed. Yes! I will make it bust. All my luck. So deep and quick. I must kick. Though it sounds to be. Alas! My own grave. So that love will break. The hardest ground. So heavily. All the evil. Until I am dust. To destroy the evil. Until my heart busts. Open for me.

Underground. And leaving only. 65 . Disregarding me faith and grace. Happiness has passed me by. Upon my face.Dead and silent. This heavy pile of dust.

And all was foreseen. I was unseen. That were about to shatter it. When a storm sweeps over me. I had to protect it from me and your growing debate. From the blunt fist of the shameful attitude. And then the remedy would be too late! 66 . Where all was green. When I look at the stars. I fear not to call myself a pathetic retarded. As they drawback and are extinguished and then departed. I had to kill it at birth. Where I lie in a ditch disregarded. My youth is confined to remain in an everlasting solitude. I had to save it from its impending fate. And they carried me to the chapel of dreams. And the dreadful regrets that rise up to multitudes.A wasted Dream From the dark claw of ingratitude. As my numb limbs were once alert with philosophy. Please forgive me … Sorrows were to be great.

The air is thick with dust and flees.A Beauty Queen A Beauty awakens at dawn. Like a net full of rocks that one flings over some sea. She wrestled inside with all the rest. To maintain all the dignity she lacked. As reluctantly she lowers her eyes from the perfection of heaven. 67 . An Opium addict who was lulled into warm drowsiness. In which she could see nothing but flowerbeds stretched everywhere. The rags had her long forgotten human face. Before her case come to trail. And who if survived. A victim. Who if died of her injuries. She sees a cluster of vehicles and a knot of people falling into tears. And gently fogging her mind. A Beauty walks the city's dirty streets. And easing away her mental pains. A Beauty roams the world for an outlet. would spend years rotting in jail. Was her Opium outlet. A prostitute who had spent her short life. She never thought that she will sink that deep. no one would know or care. And their stomachs with hers growl in fierce. A smell of cooking tugs at their nostrils. A pack of children quarrel with each other and then frown. A Beauty seeks to rebel and fight back. They pick at what looked like a bundle of rags. On the lowest rung of the ladder of human race. Thrown into the cells and beaten half to death. Creeping deliciously through her thin body.

They are here. I attach my devilish face only to shadows and ghosts. They say yes. But I will duck behind him to hide it. And I am seen through a second. Whenever I remember How I was born entire. They exist. Their world is the real world. And I am rocked from side to side. Out of discord 68 . My heart fails to turn rough. My eyes swell. By the violence of my emotion. They say no.Looking Glasses This is my face in the looking glass." I have an ugly face. I choke. Whereas I shift and change. Out of hatred. Other people have faces. Behind the devil's shoulder. My eyes prick with tears. And When I see someone passing me. "That is my face.

"I no longer follow any word through its changes. There is nothing staid. Lest I should fall off the edge of the world. I must push my feet strongly. And go back into nothingness. 69 . Alone I have fallen down into nothingness. And I die pierced with arrows to win their tears. I leap high to excite their admiration. This universe is falling into nothingness." I am crying in despair. Nothing settled in this universe. Oh God! I am avenging myself upon the moment.I imagine people watching me from far behind. I hate looking glasses which show me my real face. I no longer follow any thought from present to past. I created the devil in me.

we grow old. Tock. Tick. We are dissolved. Tick. Is ever all. As fast as a fire blazes on some far horizon. Upon the rich soil of my imagination.Tick Tock Tick. We are cut up. Images of our past breed instantly. I here. Tick. And as I rest my head on my pillow. That has long been asserting its so-called freedom. Your image blasts. Tock. ambition is vain. You there. Tick. And each time the suspense sharpens. Tock. Tock. I push my thread through the needle. Tock. I miss you … 70 . You leave me. But to sit with you. Tick. Tock. Tick. Time passes. I grieve over my worn out individuality. And as the old tap finally stops dripping. So why look at the clock ticking? I clutch your hands. Tick. Tock. Time is endless. Tock.

That she loses all self-esteem. Though eventually destroys all her eagerness. Still Me fails and loses her mind. what was happiness? Yet she yields to nothing but to loneliness. When yet grief accompanies Me. And indulges herself in more grief. And makes her get over all the things she once denied. She fails as always and thinks of herself so mean. Until Me leads herself to sleepless nights. And Me's psyche at last realizes it has been tortured not By Me. For still Thee are not more powerful than Me. For too long and underestimating Me! 71 . Which sadly over control her psyche. She mercilessly mocks at the very sight of Thee! When Thee is what has always been tormenting Me. So Me crashes down the mirror that has been holding Thee. But Thee! Me gets strong enough to get back at Thee. And drives her to no where but to darkness. She tries hard to remember. Though she looks around and thinks if this is where she ought to be. Like a statue she crumbles into dust and is no more seen. When Me's ill psyche plays tricks on her. Though she has everything that should ease her mind.Me and Thee When Me is lagging behind.

But life is short. People come and people go. I am watching your face fading so slow. People come and people go. Without a trace to follow them through. People come and people go. Like ghosts. You left no trace to remind me of you. People come and people go. Long forgotten. I saw you walking away irresolute of where to go. People come and people go. People come and people go. You didn't have to go though.People Come and People Go People come and people go. don‟t you know? 72 . lingering alone. It was your choice after all. Like shadows. People come and people go. People come and people go. Like visions. Lost long time ago.

unlike all the rest. And remain. will fail to insist. Who flew away. When they too. You are nothing but a fake land of dreams. Why bother about those who still exist. like birds from their mothers' nests.So. Oh life. 73 . Fooling us beyond belief.

How I made them despise. Me falling into vice. Yet as all their logic would fill my soul. I regret it. My right might be love. But theirs is need. And my object in life is to unite. 74 . I am proud to state it.Misjudged I know it. Between what I love and what I need. It failed to show me who is the real fool. For being misjudged by their appropriate role. By the numb look in their eyes.

"Farewell to dreams. By our wild appetite for experience." 75 . Will you marry a dead corpse? Unable to think. And our hearts were never pleased. Far away from conscience. Will you feel content? With failure accumulating by. The heart of society. And a grain of truth shouts a long cry of hails. The voice of society. And a grain of truth shouts a long cry of hails. Very close to fakes. Which has long been ceased. With life growing shorter. In which she has been bred. When honesty prevails. And youth waving goodbye. In which she has been killed. Our conscience was never at ease. Unable to speak.When Honesty Prevails … When honesty prevails.

And then weeping for fertile conclusions. When we are nothing but mere guests. Wherein ultimate civility is found. On broken dead leaves.When honesty prevails. Hanging on to illusions. Will we intend to believe. Running. Accepting self-delusions. sinking in sin. And a grain of truth shouts a long cry of hails. And heading to real immortality. You were rather born towards eternity. Violating nature. Please do not weep. You were never born to drill and die. That we will be crowned as kings and queens. 76 . With your head raised up so high. When honesty prevails. Leaving behind devils. leaping. And will remain till the end of years. And a grain of truth shouts a long cry of hails.

77 .