This action might not be possible to undo. Are you sure you want to continue?
Ma Maw sang in a falsetto voice. She had a very strong, full, deep speaking voice and the n when she broke into song; she switched to this high, breathy, falsetto that just did not seem to fit. When I was around 12 I was sitting next to her in church. At that age, everything seems to be worth a giggle. I laughed and said something about her singing voice. It shocked me when she made a tart response and did not seem to enjoy the humor that I found. Several months later I was asked to sing a song in the church Christmas program. My voice had started changing, but had not given me a lot of trouble. When I started to practice the song, it was obvious that my voice was going much deeper and at a rapid rate. I thought I had it under control, but when I got up in front of the church my voice broke into this high, off-key, squeak whenever I went for a higher note. I was horrified and rushed to Ma Maw for comfort as soon as service was over. When I tried to wrap my arms around her for her to hug me back, she pushed away and said ´Hurts, don·t it?µ. I immediately remembered making fun of her and felt the heat of embarrassment rush over me. I did not learn my lesson right then. I got angry at her for not ´caringµ about my feelings. It did stick with me, and eventually sunk in.
and immediately let out a loud. ´In all thy ways acknowledge Himµ. and though I do not support letting one rip when others are around. My first exposure to this was after Pa Paw died and Ma Maw came to live with us for awhile. I wonder how different my life would be if gratitude was such a part of my thinking that I gave thanks even for basic body functions. let alone. It is impossible to do just one story of gratitude from Ma Maw. Ma Maw was coming down the hallway and just let one rip. if that had come out of youµ. My Grandmom that I saw all the time was a quiet soul that rarely raised her voice. because Ma Maw looked at me and said ´Child. I guess I had a strange look on my face. ´thank-you Jesusµ.Gratitude ´Thank-you Jesusµ. If I heard that once growing up. I have gotten many laughs from telling that story over the years. From mundane daily occurrences to nightly prayers. Thank-You Jesus. since this was her way of life. I heard it a thousand times. . I had only been around her a few times. you·d be thanking Jesus too. I was standing in the doorway of my bedroom wondering who in the world this person was living in my house. share personal body functions.
I had a car. my parents gave me money every week even though I had a job. this all added up to a miserable life that was barely worth living. At 16. I had enough cloths to go two weeks without repeating anything. but did not have the money to do the things I wanted. Ma Maw came back with her accusation of being an un-grateful spoiled brat. My life was horrible and she did not know what she was talking about. Her words stayed with me. my car had a leak when it rained.Un-grateful Spoiled Brat If I had not been 16 years old. they did not change me. The true challenge here was that she had just expressed honest feelings and had spoken her true thoughts. when Ma Maw and I got into many of our long conversations. we were not poor. . and I had not gotten the leather jacket for Christmas that I wanted but got tons of things I had not asked for. I had plenty of food and we ate out 3-4 times a week. I was able to get a car that did not leak and my Mom put a tape player in it for me and I still bought clothes with every spare dollar. my father would not let me grow my hair. the car did not have a tape player in it (8 track that is). my own room. She went on to share my life from her perspective. I did not see her point at all. a portable stereo. But I never forgot her words and have given thanks many times for being called a brat. After spouting out my complaints. She wanted me to see that it was all in my perception. and the father that would not speak to me worked 4 jobs in order to have the money for me to have all these things. My father and I did not get along. I would have probably broken into tears and locked myself in my room after Ma Maw called me this. This day I was on a good role about how horrible my life was. I had a color television. One thing that I am grateful for is afternoons after school before my parents got home. something of a rarity in my home at that time. my parents were certainly not happy. a camera. then. at least that was what I spouted out.
no one entered unless they were invited. a room of her own. ´When I am staying here. I have my own place. and her bedspread. but it wasn·t hers. I can shut the door and read out loud. she had. . At 16. She was not allowed to change the pictures on the wall and other things in the room. She said that at our house. I had a place of my own in this world and I was grateful. She said she grew up with 10 brothers and sisters. It took m a few weeks. She had no money and had to put up with my father making smart remarks or using his sarcastic humor to put her down. He became a minister and they lived in borrowed housing having to move every couple of years. things did not seem so bad. When her door was shut. The first house she had ever owned was the 3 room cottage they retired in. Her privacy was not respected. So. I did not get it. It has been about 10 years since I lost pretty much everything of material value and moved back into my parent·s home. I do not remember exactly what came out of my mouth. and look at my things on the dresser and my pictures on the wall and I thank God because I have a place of my own in this world. Ma Maw saw it differently. say my prayers. still the way it was when she had died. She got to pick out the curtains. Once the door was shut.µ It is all in the perception. and my Aunt would go into the room when she was not there and move things around or leave her notes. but her words stuck with me. she married Martin and took off traveling in a gospel band. she said. She said that at my Uncles house she had a room. I found myself living in MaMaw·s room. for the first time in her life. but it was within the context of her not having anything to be grateful for. but I got to where I could not wait to get to my room. and being a spoiled brat.Un-grateful Brat Part II I certainly was not going to let her get away with name calling at the age of 16. and the color for the walls.
or dress a pig and when they got to larger churches the people would take them home and feed them a prepared meal in exchange for monetary compensation.. . She said she had a hard time expressing her gratitude for many years. Tenn.Lassie·s Lessons in Gratitude MaMaw often talked about the poverty that she had lived most of her life in. so PaPaw and even my Mother had gotten jobs. Everyone had to have a job and being a minister was not considered a job. Crops and livestock were what they had. She said they had more cash on hand then they had at other churches. She said that she did not know how PaPaw kept his mouth shut because she gave him ´What forµ for not standing up to the people and making them pay them in money. but because of shortages and rationing. where the nuclear research center was. She told how church people would often pay them in food and not money. so that after church. they did not have money. she would have to shuck corn. she would have rather gone and bought her own food and chosen what she wanted to eat. pluck a chicken. she still couldn·t buy what she wanted at the store. She said God taught her a lesson when they were in Oak Ridge. She said that she eventually realized what good hard working people most of the church members were and they were just treating them like they did their own family. Having money doesn·t always solve the problem.
knew that she had a tendency to worry. The belief was that if you were saved. MaMaw grew up in rural Florida. After they were ´savedµ they sat on the front pew and one of the women brought over a gas lamp. These churches took the Bible literally. then you still had sin in your life. The difference was that the fire had burned the skin off the palms of her hands. just about as back-woods as you can get. When it was her turn she grabbed the fire and jumped up and started dancing and praising God as well. and thought that they were not bound by physical laws of nature. she had overcome a lot of fear in her life. and she had reoccurring nightmares that always involved some man stealing her purse. but she never told until decades later. She worked in the fields for several weeks with rags tied around her hands and kept her hands hidden in her skirt when anyone was around. She was too embarrassed to let her family know she was still a sinner. so she hid her hands. She said she had open wounds with infection running out and the pain was so horrible she could not sleep. It has many lessons beyond that of dealing with fear. She said that they past the fire down the row and one by one the women all jumped up and started dancing in the Spirit and praising God that the fire did not burn them. . This story is the most powerful story from MaMaw. That being said. Some time during her teen years her family started going to one of the new Holy Roller churches. if it did. even though this was the second decade of the 20th century. MaMaw said that her sister had been saved and she wanted to be a part of it and went up to the altar. as long as they had faith.Fear Anyone who knew MaMaw. the fire would not burn you. She did not see a locomotive until she was a teenager.
µ That was her lead in to tell me for the first time about handling the fire. Movies. ´Work out your own salvation. cutting your hair. She had left that church before she married J. She had lived in fear that God would punish her by afflicting or taking one of her children from her. She said she hoped that God accepted ignorance as an excuse. She said ´I·ve sent a lot of people to hell that didn·t have no reason for being sent there. my PaPaw. women in pants. She said she saw it in my Mother. Martin. etc. wearing a wedding band. drinking Coke (or any soda). that was now considered not to be a sin. but it was still a Pentecostal church with its own fair share of fear to go around.µ . She was 39 years old before she says that she was finally able to make peace with it all while praying one day. so she was constantly trying to protect them. A rich lesson in the power of fear. In 1975 MaMaw was talking one day about how many things the church had taught was a sin. make-up. They were born when she was 25. Her remorse then was that she felt she had passed her fear down to her children.MaMaw lived in absolute fear that she still had sin in her life and that God would not forgive her for lying about not being burned. getting a perm. She had passed that fear down and couldn·t do anything about it.
and in those days. She then uttered one of her priceless honest expressions. She said she thought if you found someone you liked that could provide for you. Unfortunately. Being raised poor. the first time I ever remembered these subjects being talked about with her. She said. though. Ma maw tried to hide her disappointment. she had a gentleman who owned the house next door to her show some interest in becoming a couple. by the time she had talked to her family and contacted the man. She said that love was not enough when she had to put her children to bed without a meal or couldn·t afford to heat the house. She explained that she dearly loved Pa Paw and he had worked hard. that she was speaking for herself.Be Honest About What You Want. so she thought he must have had money. he had started dating someone else. you did not have a whole lot to say about who you would marry. The first time she had met PaPaw. While we were home alone one day. her had come with his father to do some business with her father. She added. you could learn to love him. . ´I married the first time for love. and Need When Ma Maw was around 70 years old. She said he looked very handsome and that he was riding his own horse. but you could see it in her face. and you had to be honest about what you wanted and needed. She came north to talk to her family about how they felt about her dating someone or even marrying. she started talking about marriage and love. Ma Maw had gone to Florida to stay for a little while at her home there. She said she did not agree with the idea of love being enough. it had not occurred to her that she could have any other life. but he was not a man that knew how to make money or how to manage it. and love never put no milk on my tableµ.
the things she wanted in life required money. Remember. did not get the chance to exercise her choice. ´Love never put no milk on my tableµ. She said if she had another chance she would marry for money. She wanted to travel. Pa Paw gave her a ball point pen as a token of his love. and they were married after service one Sunday. So. and she wanted to be able to eat out when she wanted too. but not love. The response I got as to why she married him was that she didn·t have any reason not too. but then quickly added that he was very handsome and a proud man that stood tall and would have on pressed neat clothing. Well. a new dress every now and then. perhaps I am rambling now as memories flood my mind. remember. At her age. but unfortunately. She knew what was important to her than. have a comfortable home. be honest about what is important to you. and take time to figure out what it is that you really want. I will close this story with what Ma Maw said about dating again. .Their dating was mostly just church and walking home afterwards.
You never knew when you went to the assembly. They moved every couple years. TN. and then to Montgomery. Lassie played piano in the group. Paw played the mandolin. Alabama and on to Oak Ridge. was in the group. Lassie·s brother H. She could only play music with shaped notes. when the church would have it·s assembly. Lassie grew up in rural Florida in the early 1900·s. they were in a traveling gospel band. in 1927.W. L. They moved all over Florida. Juanita and J. but the shaped noted told her what chords to play. She came from a family of 12 children and went to a one room school house. Pa. I knew her as Ma Maw.Lassiephine Missouri Chesser Baldree ´Lassieµ ´Ma Mawµ This book is filled with memories and words from Lassiephine Missouri Baldree. They travelled the south and went all the way to Texas (God forsaken land according to Lassie). By the time their children were born. Ma Maw always said she remembered the Parton family. Lassie·s brother P. Cleveland. but she didn·t remember any bosoms that big. She could not really read music. one of the first. Ma Maw and Pa Paw were pasturing churches for the Church of God. For a while. They were in Oak Ridge when the bomb was being built and then went over to Seveirville. were married. whether you would be returning home to the same church. played guitar and his wife Maggie played tambourine. TN. . who was my grandmother on my mother·s side. Martin Sr. Martin Jr. which was the church that Dolly Parton·s family went to. When she and J. She was born in 1903 and married in 1924 and gave birth to her only children. In Dolly·s autobiography she mentions starting to sing at the Friday night gospel sings at the Church of God.
That was Ma Maw·s pride and joy. I have discovered over the years that Ma Maw told me things she did not tell others. Whenever we took Ma Maw home. The first house they ever owned was on the camp ground in Wimauma. She had her share of faults and shortcomings. and Paul-Michael. Put the mullet fillet down. I credit her with helping me to maintain my sanity. She would clean the house from top to bottom and start working out in the yard. I call this: Lessons From Lassie . She was not a wise woman uttering life lessons all the time. a lime. Tiffany. She had orange trees. Her favorite dish was fried mullet with grits and eggs. The home had no a/c and the only heat was small electric heaters built into the wall. Pa Paw did all the shopping and controlled the check book. dump a pile of grits on top and then put the egg. I feel very privileged to have these memories and to be able to pass them on to you. He had a heart attack on their way home from visiting a church in another town. She started living with us part of the year when I was around 6 years old. her energy level and her attitude changed completely. The first one was a shack sitting on cinder blocks and then they built a block 3 room home with a carport. She was honest about what she was thinking and she was just herself. Ma maw got him to the house. Pa Paw did not live very long after they built that home. but there was no ambulance or hospital close by and he passed away. To the next generation. when Pa Paw died. FL. Ma Maw did not even know how to use the checking acct. a grapefruit and an avocado.Ma Maw never learned to drive until after pa Paw died. I hope that you find comfort and some usable wisdom in my stories. but she had times where she could cut through all the emotions and speak to the real issues and share words of wisdom. Jana.
Macey. Lassie and Macey had loaded the water and were ready to head home. she pulled out a handful of oats. Macey hated fetching water and hated the old mule. He fist and forearm disappeared up where the sun don·t shine in the mule. The mule lunged forward and Macey fell with her arm still raised. Ma Maw said her hand went so far up. They had a wagon with barrels on it that they would have to go down and fill up. One afternoon when Macey had something she wanted to do. but she either hit the mule or threw something at it. The wagon was pulled by an old mule. The story has varied some over the years. Ma Maw used this story as an example of the consequences of your actions.Suffer the Consequences When Ma Maw was a teenager. nothing worked. it was her responsibility. this story was priceless to her. but the mule would not move. along with her sister. as it was to those of us who got to hear it. because he was so stubborn that it would take twice as long to get the water. Which got the mule going. . and also when she needed a good laugh. to fetch the water. the mule was being extra stubborn. The mule ran all the way home. Macey stood up and was screaming (and evidently cursed some) at the mule with her fist raised. They had a watering hole about ½ mile from the house. As the only witness. Slapping the reins hollering.
She said there is the fear of doing something you don·t want to do. Once you·re here. Half way up the hill you aren·t sure you really want to do it. there is no way out except to stay on the ride. saying that if she really believed what the church taught. She said she wasn·t really afraid. . so she was a little apprehensive. and the fear of doing something for the first time. She went on later in the conversation to say she figured it was like riding a roller coaster. than she would not have any fear of death. but you can·t get off now. it was just that she had never done it before. She said that was like life. She gave me her explanation. Seems to make sense to me.Fear Of Death One day I was chiding Ma Maw some.
This action might not be possible to undo. Are you sure you want to continue?
We've moved you to where you read on your other device.
Get the full title to continue listening from where you left off, or restart the preview.