You are on page 1of 4

Minutes of the 731st meeting of the

Paddock Party Committee


Held at Hibiscus House, Friday 1 August 2008, theoretically with a 7:30pm
start but as all the South Side members took some time to assist Sue and
her summer pudding reach the North side intact there was no quorum until
more like 8pm.

Present
Graeme Maggie Richard Penny SarahB Adrian Sue Summer Pudding
Andrew

SarahD and Steve arrived rather later in the evening, the Astcote Express
encountering cheese on the line on the return run from Portugal.

Minutes of the previous meeting


Sue did, in fact, manage to read them this time but wished to apologise to
her neighbours for assorted loud gurgling noises and screeches that
emerged shortly after taking delivery of a hard copy. As a midwife one might
have expected her to have become accustomed to these type of noises but
not actually to create them herself.

Matters arising
SarahB wished to make it clear that there had been no prevarication going
on and a fourth request to put the German towel down on Cold Hiccough
Village Hall furniture would not be necessary.

Tickets
The Chairman reported that at a sub committee meeting held earlier in the
day stock had been taken of several members' estimates of attendance so
there remained only what he hoped would be the simple task of noting the
updated numbers from others. Unfortunately, his hopes were in vain as it
proved impossible for anyone to come up with a number, determined
instead to describe in some detail the name, appearance and other
attributes of sundry individuals encountered on their ticket sale travels.

With a satisfying thud of Chairman's hand on trouser leg (fortunately his


own) tales from the river bank of Astcote life were brought to a juddering
halt reminiscent of Steve's train ramming a closed cat-flap last year. All he
wanted, it seemed, were the numbers.

These were:
Responsible for distribution Minimum pretty sure Likely maximum
Penny & Richard 2 6
Sue 20 24
Adrian & SarahB 6 6
Andrew 14 18
Graeme & Maggie 17 20
(performers etc)
Graeme & Maggie (guests) 29 30
Cathy 9 9
SarahD & Steve 10 12
Minutes of the 728th meeting of the Paddock Party Committee

Total 107 125

It was agreed that for the event to have the best ambience guest numbers
needed to be 120 or so and that, at the moment, we were falling quite short
of this target. Everyone was urged, therefore, to encourage friends or
associates in local institutions to attend. Steve beamed, presumably at the
use of the word ambience. The Minutes Secretary thought it should be made
clear that by institutions the committee meant something like Women's
rather than Mental.

Several members reckoned that they could now approach people who had
been interested and a big effort would be made to get the numbers up.
Graeme needs to know how many extras can be pretty much relied on as he
will have to finalise the hog dimensions on Friday 9th. All to confirm their
numbers by then please. (This should include those who may not yet have
paid but are still pretty sure to come).

Tables, fixtures and fittings


Hey folks! Some really exciting good news to be reported. The committee
were delighted to note that the redoubtable SarahB should never have
been faintly doubted, or even re-doubted as had been minuted previously.
Not only has she fully and completely done the business with the Powers
That Be in Cold Hiccough to nab the furniture from beneath assorted butts
west of Watling Street but also proffered the services of a somewhat
surprised Adrian to transport the buttless objects in the veritable green
Polo.

After due celebration (that's enough positive spin, Ed.) Maggie said that
Peter might be persuaded to collect same in his van in one trip rather than
the 34 estimated to be required for the VGP.

The Minutes Secretary agreed to liaise with Peter next time he encounters
him.

Graeme had booked the Scout tent.


Maggie had investigated the contents of the barns and decided that there
were sufficient bales in good condition there and needn't trouble Farmer
Evans about ‘is bales.

The gate
Just as everyone thought the meeting was over and discussion might return
to the merits of Portugese architecture or the type of bean found in some
quiche the Minutes Secretary sobered up to pose the query raised at the
previous meeting as to what we should do about flogging raffle tickets,
taking money for unpaid tickets and ensuring that guests are suitably
greeted and watered upon arrival.

Pressing on despite the groans of I Wanna Go Home (from an early Beach


Boys track) he suggested that two people be on the gate from 6:30pm for an
hour or so. One couple to start and then another couple to relieve them at 7
would make half-hour shifts easily taken on. Andrew, Adrian and Richard
agreed to do shifts and we would look around for an extra bod to complete
the Welcome Committee.

Music
The Chairman reported that he would be using his iPod to entertain the
crowds. Members looked a little askance initially, wondering whether there
would be enough headphones for everyone. Apparently, though, he believes
that he can plug his end into an amplifier and that'll do the trick. To that end,

Page 2 of 4
Minutes of the 728th meeting of the Paddock Party Committee

Richard, Adrian and Andrew will provide mp3 files or CDs to add to his
collection. It will then be possible to select tracks to meet the inevitable “We
need Aretha” and variations on that theme. Whether it was also practical or
feasible, as no-one will have glasses available or be sober enough to
distinguish between Cleo Lane and Leo Sayer, was another matter.

Special requests received to date by the Minutes Secretary include the


aforementioned Cleo and Sade. Richard would provide Graeme with a Sade
CD. The Minutes Secretary will attempt to download tracks that aren't in
anyone's easily accessible collections.

Saladeers’ report
The shopping will be taken care of soon and all was in order.

Raffle
SarahB had yet another bright idea. It was called A Hamper. She would do
the hamper base (and the sides, too, members mused) and invited members
to donate some content. One or two offers were made with varying degrees
of both suitability and humour, in inverse proportion to the other. All
members should please tell SarahB what they've got as soon as possible
please so that she can gauge the size of container required.
Graeme reported that he expected a large bottle of whiskey to be donated
and would advise what was meant by the term large in due course.

There was also further conversation on what might be 1st, 2nd, 3rd etc. It was
resolved to wait and see what came in.

Steve woke briefly from recollections of how Romanesque influence arrived


in the 11th century when Portugal was emerging as a nation state, brought
from France by Burgundian knights and monks, of cathedrals built in this
style as local fortified castles, explaining the need for fortification against
the continued military threat of the Moors and, later, the Castilians, and
musings of the cathedrals of Lisbon, Coimbra, Porto, and Braga and their
crenellated façade towers when the list of prizes appeared to be
approaching a number larger than that of which he might approve.

Next meeting
The next meeting will be for erection practice on Friday 15 August. Members
should be out in the paddock from the afternoon onwards.

There then followed some discussion as to what may or not comprise a


shriek and a further discussion about the gate. An idea had been submitted
to combine the meeting and greeting with the booze infusion service,
commonly referred to as The Beer Tent, by moving said tent to the gateway
itself so that SarahB could, in theory, allow only those who contributed
amply to the raffle pot to sample her wares in the alcohol department.

This idea was roundly rejected by SarahB announcing that there would be no
erections of that sort over her dead body. At which point, after
demonstrating a remarkable knowledge and digestive effect of different
types of bean again, the Chairman brought the meeting to a thunderous end
and wondered out loud whether there might be any more of that superb red
wine left.

Thanks to Penny & Richard for the superb demonstration of culinary skills
and use of their patio and standard lamp.

Page 3 of 4
Minutes of the 728th meeting of the Paddock Party Committee

Page 4 of 4