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volume sixty-five, issue 7 january 13, 2020 Masthead managing editor-in-chief amin ‘content editorin-chies Editor's Address sofia champion Cheers iiss, Treshuoman near Weleome othe new decade and the new semester. Before we allscome disilisioned by the return to monotone treasurer ‘cadena, we would ik ake a second to appreciate the rin bali finer things. Namely, convenience store and ther bountifal processed offerings which will no doubt conte to fel out arts & culture Inte night study sessions and post sciaiing munchies binges maya morgan & emma kelly panera » ‘Ove the break the masthead assembled for he cstomary opinions Bevvy Review. Read futher for ou resulting expert selection Iocashentsman meskar ofthe inst 7/1 vintages and international specialties. These pages aso abound with contributor guides tothe best ener avant-garg ‘drinks, rare sodas and late night snack picks, alongside poetic Isobel carnegie Siam p. bryant tebutes to convenience in the ste of Rupt Ka Enjoy the tasty comic bites and serious examinations of the goings-on of polities ‘ou world, and don't forget to wash it all down with your sofa champion Biggest Gulp, comics Buy us lottery ticket while you're at it, race kovacs&calebsandblom Sofia Champion & An Li Tsang Efitors.in-Chiet distributor frida cera stall anna brie augustine Josh benstork ble glantz subhijha kitkeaton cD > What am doing here? Noe, but the guy atthe cash register is falling Now Tim here, now; hen Time doesn exist here “A WAK Down THE AISLE, acee eco buathing, specs with a unistbe, tne Entitaining ant timont mun bees Zap snemeseles with shogans, bs Onss. tat ia eae @ Monday Blues. GR aleve we. es Ne A sign abe These wines, ie eackernar, Watching, Ty, fe ve sate of oping cod hy, fod te flow in sticky strrents, In Tha. Daytime, ing me A oe pacers, © idl Monday Morning, Yt Mat ne, oe ee bi Ge been tomes T have cla, Seah ae wy oniete Ta, ee 1 Uasaeoe wah calle ace” vo Act ture Cle ices ais ) Whe am I becomiitg “7 Read Tatetetn in aie whee J fas et Who heve I become win tne Spemtgpe’ cee LT nd to stop Praiang, gysen emd red iduls nonetheless, © > Skippins, AS a Perego Sen Foe bar oat dase? TE she drow amd. Kited, Like 6 gpdtess 04 tnquitos ond suushies: ae t Bev: wapveve Rating: €/10 Comments orried about Submitting? Don’t Be! Caen HED IM TE PLeMRE OF Cie ‘We often hear people are nervous about a, contributing to the Garg because they're worried manaceas {tr pocty/prose/opinions/artes arent we foe “good enough First of al, we LOVE trash, so never think our ‘Standards ar too high But in ease you want to pitch before submitting ‘or want to Brig a workin prosress to workshop, ‘we wil be hosting OPEN OFFICE HOURS 6- Spm before next prodvetion lanuary 234) in the Ancillary Of. Io thelet coming up the Sais from the H door. Orema us (a ‘esutgonleg gmail com) for feedback at any time just make sure to se TRASH i the subject Tine ‘Sal ya later! sit @ bquid coulh give Jour movtn shir + milk-+ grape) os I mods aig 3/10 | tastes ce Attention!-> Pas I a The Gargoyle hereby sols submisonstots anual athe Hudes Contest tobe published in February's SEX Issue Se ee ‘ Mr ee ¢ i fore Eeopporents to win oto =a com Silicone Marital Aids 9 Goer we shives] T 1 } a oe + gga spi dng le com Do wih | | | Mest ‘ nO eet Pras Sop _ oo ‘t Scene eye SOFIA? Ee SENSU pens GA Bey: NAAT gal Bev: ‘ten GURY USAT — — a Sine to oo 0 8/10) mug Sit aa sip ng uci ce Nie HEALTHYmetalie 4 share ha mio anal ht operon NESE, Gee? euarftthon’s He ; r ® .| SSek euwour | yeast ponese on cinta ae a oan ee Le Sr tr fg maga sorpeo See vevivigh moss |x doogl oa make HAVE. Rain no Kem teagan Seale lat = Soma feons drink ® | canceled each | AGSTAINSTAINER cpecte Singer | cHttored! nardic acprsiap OG AMd FeO iy AIRY inétausk tam |” a i! Soy austirl its ntthing =gooty yoory _| - kefir 6 oldey Sate on mice PENIS CD consiorency. si